March 19, 2018 • 38 mins
The first episode of "Fej Ham" with Danielle, Greg T and Garrett is FINALLY LIVE! What is 'Fej Ham'? Great question BUT we don't even know. Join us as we try to put this podcast together!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Headphones one, two, five. Okay, all right, today's March nine.
You guys ready ready? Episode one fetch Ham? Are you ready?
What did he say? What did they say? What does
she say? You're having a good day in fetch Ham?
(00:27):
You know, I don't like the way he says that
the end is fetch Ham. How do you already have
a problem? We did? This is our first podcast. We've
not even been here for two seconds and you're already complaining. Well,
because the way that the voice guy said at the end,
like you know that would be Stacks, not the voice guy.
I'm just saying fedch Ham. You know you should be like,
(00:48):
there's fetch Ham. Okay, I think it's fine. Do you
think it's fine? I think it's fine. Al Right, guys,
welcome to episode one to fetch Ham. It is March
the nineteen. I'm great t We got Daniel Mnaire and
of course we've got Garret. You guys will definitely know
us from the five am pre morning show. That's only
if you listen to New York Which one you said?
(01:10):
Tell me I haven't the yeah you got? You gotta
turn it down a little bit. Why don't ask questions?
Just follow because I will explain everything to you, but
then you'll be You'll it'll go in one year out
the other like it already did ten minutes ago. It
was the first thing I said before we hit start listen,
(01:31):
please lower the bed. Okay, here's here's what everybody has
to understand. So we're in the studio. Now, that's not
here's the five Am pre Morningshaw studio, and nor is
that the Elvis Story Morningshow studio. So when I walked
in here, Danielle Garret's like, hey, man, I'm gonna need
to sit there and work the board. And I'm like, dude,
what are you talking about on the five AM show?
Because you know it's been Here's the thing. He knows
(01:53):
you're gonna have over modulation. The beds are not gonna work,
the sound's gonna be off. You know that is all
on your concerned. And my first direction to him was, hey,
when you start the intro to to this, just lower
the bed a little bit so our voices could be
heard over the music. Maybe it's like an education. This
is this is what's called the bed ladies. Yes, So
(02:15):
what Greg t does is keeps the level where it
is already. First direction. Well, what I want to know
is this, Garrett, if I see because now what what
the audience also doesn't know is that in front of me,
I see these digital lights and they go from green
to yellow to red. When it goes to red, it
means that the music is too loud. Correct, So when
(02:37):
they never they never go to red. It doesn't matter
when it goes to red or not. But when you
keep the levels at a certain spot, like when you
start it and don't fade it down, the level stay
where it is, and our voices stay where it is.
So to hear our voices, you have to lower the music.
You know, you're such a veedge? What does that mean?
It start? You call a podcast that, then you start
(02:59):
you the way you delivered it. I'll take it as
an insult. We don't know what it means. Danielle has
asked me before. What were you asking me? Danielle, We're
gonna do fed to the week? And I said, well,
fed to the week? Should that be a positive or
negative person? And he said I don't know. I don't so,
daniel if you go, hey, we have the FECh of
the week, I will take that as a positive. The
(03:19):
fedge of the week. The way the way Shrek over
here just delivered that's not nice. The way he just
delivered fedge towards my direction it was I'll take it
as a negative. Two things. One, if you do a
side by side of means Shrek, I admit there is
a resemblance. Why are we going off the rails already?
We haven't even been talking for like six seven minutes.
(03:40):
Welcome to fedg Ham, Danielle, take control of this, okay,
So what is fedg Ham? Honestly we don't know. We
do a pre show together in New York on the
lead into the Elvis during morning show, and some people
have said to us, you guys should talk more, and
I'm like, well, we only have that platform. So we
decided to talk more and give you fedge Ham. But
(04:01):
we really couldn't think of what to call the podcast,
and so Greg T came up with f e j Ham.
So it's fedg Ham. Honestly, we couldn't tell you what
it means, but it's basically the three of us sitting around.
We went out on a limb. And of course Gregg
T's very good at this. When he's excited about something,
he he wants to tell the masses. He's not about
(04:24):
the element of surprise. If he was working with Beyonce's team,
he would be fired already because Beyonce says, Hey, I
want to drop an album no one knows about, but
Gregg T would tell everybody. So once we decided to
do fedg Ham, gregg T decides to go on a
radio where a few people listen to to our to
one in the morning before we start the Elvis Duranto.
You know what, here's the other thing that people are
(04:45):
if they don't know, they're listening right now for the
first time. So yeah, So, even though the Elvis duran
Morning Show is syndicated across the country, unlike close to
a hundred radio stations, there is a station that carries
us right here in New York City are our home base,
and we have a five am lead in show. So
we go on at six am New York time. We
(05:06):
go on to do a five am show here in
New York. So great to talking to the New York,
New Jersey, Connecticut. Yes. Great T decides to give out
the name of the podcast where a year ago we
haven't even started yet. Jam the idea we've been talking
about this for over a year the idea was born,
(05:26):
nothing has come together yet. So he goes out, he
spells it on the radio. Someone someone took mostly all
the social media accounts for fedge Hams, so now you
can follow us on Instagram and on Twitter. It's at
fedg ham Official, f E J Ham Official at fedgeham
(05:48):
official official. Yes, because somebody, Well here's the other thing.
If you listen and you hear Greg t very excited
about something, the reality is it's still months away from happening.
So so when he comes out and says, hey, I
got this thing, we're still the idea literally just probably
came to us no more than ten seconds prior to
(06:08):
you know, guys, I'm in the room here. I feel
like a third person. I feel like, you know, you're
like you're talking about it, but I'm here, and I
think we're on here. We're going to discuss lots of things.
We're definitely going to throw in some conspiracy theories because
you know, Greg Tea's all about conspiracy theories that picked
up on the Chicken have been begging not to do it.
But see, originally I wanted to do a podcast called
Conspiracy Theories, and we were going to do that, and
(06:30):
people wanted that. People because it started with tease conspiracy
with chicken. He is totally convinced that chicken. It's a
lot of proof. Now, okay, it start, don't explain it
quickly about your chicken conspiracy. It was one day I
was sitting in traffic and on the right of me
(06:53):
were all these like stores, these strip malls, you know,
and they all were like, you know, they're all food
stores that I've ever even heard of before, right, and
they all had chicken in them. There were supplying chicken,
so adorned on me. There's a very common food. Yes,
if everybody is selling chicken, even your local gas station,
you can run in and go get a chicken sandwich.
There's so much, so many people, there's not enough chicken
(07:16):
to be had. So he thinks that's what is it
manufactured chicken in factories that you know, in places that
we can't go to. The government is making chicken fake chicken.
You never know, he could be true, could be he
could be onto something because how can you possibly go
to all these different places and ask for chicken and
they all have it. Have you ever been to a
place where chicken was sold out No. I guess well no,
(07:39):
but I actually have been to restaurants where they've running
run out of chicken. I swear to you, with the
chicken is no longer available. That's what they said, already
poking holes in your theories. The thing is is that
there's if if my kids and your kids and Garret
kids ever eating damn chicken. We have chickens everywhere. You
(08:00):
wouldn't be able to run away from chickens. You have
chickens on the sidewalk, chickens and downstairs, chickens to the
red light. You have chickens in your neighbor, in your backyard,
your chickens in So you're saying chickens would out outnumber
all of humanity in order to supply the United States
of America. You have chickens everywhere. Not the world, No,
you have chill on the world for sure, Chickens on yachts.
On chickens on yachts. I'd like to see chickens on
(08:24):
BII outside the wings maybe maybe flying and landing everywhere.
Chickens everywhere, Chickens on your roof, Chickens everywhere. In your name, Danielle,
this is the equivalent of giving a child candy right
before bedtime. Now he's all wound up. Listen all right,
So anyway, that's just a little taste. But yeah, so
that's how it all began. We were like, oh my gosh,
(08:46):
this is great. You have so many of these conspiracies.
We're gonna do a conspiracy podcast because he on the
on the Elvis de Rancho a lot of times he
gives us his wonderful conspiracies. And then he decided he
didn't want to do that podcast, and he decided he
wanted to do something else because too many people will
think I'm crazy. Too many What do you mean, think
(09:06):
I'm not crazy? Okay, I am not crazy. These are
real thoughts he did over the weekend. What did he do?
He decided to try to cut down a tree. Guess
how long it took? Four hours? You cut down a
tree yourself, a huge tree, Well it was a limb
a little four hours. Well, that's what I wanted to
do here on fed Sham. I felt like, you know,
(09:27):
Mondays are always good days for us to do the
Fedham recording. Now, w are we doing it not every week? Right? Well?
I guess we would try to do it as often
as we can Let's let's put our pinky toe into
the water before jumping into the deep end. So what
we'd like to aim for is like every Monday, we
would like to record a podcast fed sham podcast, right,
(09:48):
but who knows? I mean the things that Again, what
we have going on here is that there's so much
to do behind the microphones, behind the scenes, on the scenes, right,
Like for instance, Danielle today like what is your what's
on your Genits? Well, no, normally on a normal day,
I would after the show, I record commercials, right, then
I do right, possibly a phone tap depending on the
(10:09):
day after Elvis, which is our after Avis thinking we
do the fifteen minute morning show podcast right, Um, so
there's a lot going on, and then we might have meetings.
So it just depends on you know, today we were
very lucky because we managed to fit it in. But
it just depends. What would you have on a normal Monday.
I don't know. Come on, it's different every Monday, different
(10:31):
every Monday. Again, that's the negative. I think a fedge
can be a positive or negative. You're such a fedge,
but normally it's coming negative from him, So I have
not heard things are negative from him Daniel. You know
you look, you look at your fete today. See that's
a positive, it better positive thing. But you know, you
(10:52):
know it's funny we're talking about great t top chopping
down a tree. You know it's funny he considers his
neighbor crazy. Why so if we're gonna talk about the story,
so what happens. See, we're like all over the place.
By the way, if I was listening, I would have
turned us off. It's a big vegg and mess. You're
just gonna work it into everything. Well, if I was
(11:12):
going to go into my story about cutting the limb down,
I would want to have like a sound if I
got a chainsaw, because that's where I believe fed should
also be fedge, should be theater of the mind. We
should be able to take our audience on a journey.
So that if I'm gonna say I was in my backyard,
you know, So take down. Take that keyboard right underneath
(11:34):
by your stomach. Alright, so I have a keyboard here,
you ahead control. It's always control. F I don't know
why chainsaw chain got a type into the computer. And
this is live, this is real deal. This isn't live.
We're recording it. Later. You know, no, see this it
says guy pranking a friend with a chainsaw. Let's say,
didn't say chainsaw effect. Maybe we should have planned this
(11:57):
before we open. That sounds fun. That would be a
real show. This is fedge Ham. We don't do that here.
We don't fetch him. I don't think people come here
for like a real show. They're coming here to be
a fedge. Oh my gosh, this is why I wanted
to be where he's sitting. I know, yeah, exactly. So. So,
so we're in the backyard because this nor easter blew through.
(12:20):
Let youn't find it right now? What easter blew through
the two weeks ago, I think, like this weekend. I'm like,
what are you talking about? No, So then what happened was,
so we have these ginormous pine trees in my yard,
you knowinous, like like Colorado put a number on it,
put a number on it. These things got to be
like eight feet tall maybe I'm sorry stories eight stories tall.
(12:44):
Ginormous is eight feet tall, eight stories, eight stories tall.
They're massive. So the nor easter blew through, and all
the weight was weighing on some of these limbs, and
the limb just woom, and it cracked down and it
fell half into the forest and half onto my my property.
So when happen it was? I said to my neighbor,
I said, hey, Glenn, come over and look at this thing.
You think we can cut this ourselves? Or should I
(13:05):
call a tree company? And he came over to look
at it. Now, we could do it. We could do it.
He's one of those I could do it. Okay, So
what happens preface you you think your neighbor is crazy.
I think he's crazy because because he which is ironic. Well,
he's one of these people who thinks he could do
everything no matter what it is. It familiar. No, I'm
not like that. So he comes over at noontime on Saturday.
(13:29):
We finished four fifteen. Let me tell you something comes over.
It comes over this limit is this from history? My
tree gives something out into his yard. He's been four
hours helping you out. I hope you got the guy
a beer. Well, my gift card after gatorade. I paid
his kid. His son was there too. I give us
sons three dollars twelve years old, four hours worth of work,
(13:52):
twelve year old kid. How much you gonna give it
twelve year a kid. How much did you give a
twelve year Fifty bucks would have been good. I don't know.
But you pay your barber or than you paid the
kid that did manual labor in your yard. That's good
point we'll get to another day. But so anyway, so
we started with the chainsaw right, and we got the
ear gear on right, and I'm like, god, I'll do
(14:13):
to the side that you're cutting them brack and everything's
cracking and everything. By two o'clock we must add three
or four ft of brush. Like it was so big
that like we couldn't even we were surrounding ourselves in brush.
It was unbelievable. So finally we got it all done,
brought out to the curb, and the good thing about
where I live, the community comes by and they pick
(14:33):
it up, which is awesome. Twice a year they do it.
So my my next day to come to do it
is uh March, They're coming to pick it up, so
hopefully they come. But why did it take four hours?
Four four hours fifteen minutes? Why took forever? This thing
was massive? No, it was not like a little limb.
With this thing, the size of the limb is equal
(14:54):
to like it could have been two and a half
feet in diameter. I swear to god massive. Did you
hit anybody with the limb? Did the limb fall on nobody? No? No, no,
it was It was on the ground already. We were
very nervous that it might roll on top of us
because the way it was sitting was sitting on top
of a knowledge. So what did you do? Cut it
in pieces? And are you using it for firewood? No?
(15:15):
Take out the curb. I don't know fireplace, so you don't.
I do. We don't use it house with the fireplace.
Why wouldn't you use the fireplace in your house that
you crap this in there? Are you serious? So I
have candles in it? Oh? Candles would kill for a
(15:36):
house with a fireplace, And you don't use it? No,
because I have candles and it looks much nicer a
little candle lab run there. It looks nice. It's clean,
It's all beautifully clean, and stare at the candles. Tease
if you don't know, tease one of those people that
his house has to be. If he came to my house,
he would probably vomit because certain parts of my house
I have so much crap that I need to go
(15:57):
through and clean out nice and clean, like my bedroom.
Yesterday I was sitting there, coming what are all these
boxes stuff? We have a lot of boxes stacked up
that I have to go through Amazon on them. You
know those are all open. And he also has he's
got some O C D. We all do. I have
a little. I have O C D as well. But
(16:19):
Queen wait has to have his hangers a certain distance
apart in his closet. What is it? How far apart
is thumb between each other? What do you think in
his closet? Where do you think it came from? I
feel like Elvis put you guys up to No, he didn't.
He didn't even know we're doing fedge haam today. My
conspiracy is that Elvis talk. He took you guys. He said, listen,
(16:41):
here's a new conspiracy. Here's another one. He is not
going to go to a shrink, so be his friends.
But not a shrink. That's not nice for him to shrink.
It's a therapist or psychiatrist. There's a shrink. A lot
of people see them because we all could use somebody
to talk to you being such a fedge. I'm the
see that was only episode one. Here's a score card
(17:04):
if you're playing at home, So I want you to
keep tracking. Conspiracy is great. Tea comes up and every
time Danielle says I'm done, I'm walking out of here,
and one go ahead. This conspiracy. So your your conspiracy
is that Elvis put us up to this here in
the making. Elvis told told you guys in the making.
Try to get him to open up and like talk
(17:26):
about what's going on in his life, and then it'll
like be a the it will be a therapy session.
Trust me, I know not to go there. You are
doctors fedge Hams, and I'm here to talk to you
guys about my problem. No way. Well, okay, so anyway,
enough about me. What did you guys do over the weekend.
I went to a wrestling event on us on Friday
night at Madison Square Guarden. I mean, give it for
(17:50):
what it is. Yes, it is fake, beyond fake. But
did you sit close? Because when you sit close you
can see how fake. It's better on TV personally, but
but when you're there with a bunch of friends and
there's nothing to worry about except for who's getting the
next beer. By the end of the night, you start
believing that it's real and you started. I messed up.
(18:11):
I'm sorry starting Take a good look, Cleveland, because this
is what a world championship looks like. Trying to idiot
face over. There's never gonna bring you a title that
that wasn't from Friday. He was just trying to relate.
He was trying to relate. I'm trying remember one album. Yeah,
(18:38):
so so I did that and then uh Saturday with St.
Patrick's Day? So wait, you are you are driving the
Titanic right now searching for something with a white What
(18:58):
did I say yes to? Why did I agree to
do this podcast? Because we're a bunch of fetg is
gonna be a big fetge and mess? Oh my god,
Hold on a second, there's some good stuff here. I'm
not even kidding you. Wait, where's my words? My Irish stuff?
I love? I played it from the other over the weekend.
What did I do? So? I had my family over
because my son's birthdays at the end of the month,
the family, Do you have a happy Fritnday? No, we're
(19:21):
past St. Patrick's. That's not even Irish. Do you know
it's gonna sound like Irish? That sounds like Irish. Come on,
this is Irish. It's that's full Irish. That's not the
Irish I'm talking about. I'm sorry, I didn't know you
were thesh. I think we've been talking too long. How
(19:45):
long is this podcast? As great tea searches for stuff?
So Danielle the family came over exactly. We had a
nice day with the family. Um what else did I
do this weekend? We watched a couple of movies at home.
We have, oh, A couple of friends came over. Because
I did not watch Jumanji. We actually watched some kids
movie a different we all Ferdinand. We were going to
(20:07):
watch It's okay, we were going to watch Jumanji, but
I didn't have enough time. But John Cena is the
voice of Ferdinand. It was cute. I mean it was
you know. I felt like, um, I felt like parts
of it were too much for kids, to be honest,
if you haven't seen it, yeah, because it's bullfighting, and
(20:28):
you know, if the bull doesn't do well, it goes
to anything. And then there was half of the half
of the movie they're trying to save their other friend
from the slaughterhouse. It's like, I don't know that this
is the problem. We give you a toy. I just
found my We're onto the next subject and he's gonna
Now he's gonna come up with the music. Here's the
here's yeah, listen to this. Do us from St Patrick's
(20:53):
day to hear that this is the worms? Don't want
to be here? Kicks into the coast of this podcast. So, guys,
(21:14):
we promised that not every podcast I'll be like this.
I think we just had to get one out there.
But we promise that this is fun. We will do
more and actually we'll come up with segments. Wait, we
will do fed to the Week. Do we have an
email address yet? You were supposed to put that together something? Wait,
(21:34):
you know what, Hold on, I want to tell you
something about the segments. So when you do fed you
the Week. Yeah, I've got music for you ready already,
So like, come up with who would you do for
fedge the week? Right now? I don't know. It's the Monday,
so they don't have a fed to the weekend? Could
be anything good or bad? Um, Garrett, help me with this.
Let's see fed of the week. Anybody I would say
(21:56):
logic logic, Well I logic depends on what's going on.
Who you want to use, I'll use that grandmother. Who's
the who's the double A team? The sixteenth bracket U
m C. They had that none that was pretty much
went to every game. Yeah. I don't know the whole
story about her though. Okay, so only stories that you're
(22:19):
from this podcast? Are you talking about CBS March Madness?
Here we go. Can we make let's make the Backstreet
Boys the Fedge of the week. Okay, okay, so wait,
so right, but there's a positive fedge, so right now
we can't say if it's positive. We're all laughing about
(22:40):
something just happened, right, all laughing? That's awesome. All right,
It's now time for Fedge of the Week. Now we
got Danielle. This is the music we alright, guys, we're
gonna get the Fedge of the Week to the Backstreet Boys.
And why are we doing this? Well because Backstreet's back, baby,
and they're actually doing a whole one two other things.
(23:01):
Right now. They're opening a restaurant called Backstreet Barbecue. They
just decided that they're going to start this. They also
want to go into the tequila business once they find
a partner in Mexico. The Backstreet expanding from music, doing
other things together, trying to make some more cash. So barbecue, yes,
I would, of course I would back Street barbecue, would
(23:22):
I don't think so. I ate stake that Greg t
cooked on his bare butt, George Foreman grill, I ate
a fees. Yes, the bar is low for me, so yes.
So that that's why we're giving Backstreet the offecte of
the week. Congratulations branding business to the Backstreet Boys. I
gotta tell you, I will not criticize her if she's
(23:43):
if Danielle picks backstret the week, it is what Danielle said,
it is what it is. That's why I will not
criticize Danielle's fed. That's how we're starting. So Okay, we're
gonna do other things too, but at least we have
we already have one segment that to the week. The
week you go back to the first one for Danielle.
What do we two segments? What's the other one? We
(24:09):
have Garrett's Fetch News? What I let him create the name?
What do you do for FS? Well, let's recap. Let's
recap you know some stuff that's happened over the last
few days. I think goes I got a segment. I go,
what's your segment? He goes, fetch news. I didn't say
fetch news. I let him create it. But you know, so,
(24:30):
so this being Monday, what's the date, March March nineteen
March nineteen. So there's been, you know, a ton of
music that's always been released. But are you always curious
what music was number one? You know, almost maybe forty
years ago. So let's go through the last almost forty
years of number one's right here, okay, we're doing all
forty this sorry, here you go, Oh my god, number
(24:55):
one this week in music history. Years love that song? Right?
Five years ago, nine eight three? Really thirty years ago,
that's such a great sive years ago nine a right,
(25:23):
twenty years ago, twenty years ago, fifty years ago, two
thousand three. We'd be ten years ago two thousand eight,
five years ago, two thousand thirteen, remember that when we
(25:44):
all sat here in Harlem sad? All right, back to
the new it's five years ago, all right, back to
French one year ago, two thousand seventeen. Yeah, in love
with the shape you there you go. That's cool, Gary, right,
going back in history, So let's talk it on her.
He doesn't bring it to the five am show. But
he's got this for fed Champ. I said to my go, dude,
(26:07):
I go all these years during the five am pre show,
you couldn't have brought that to me. I would have
loved to have played that. He's like, yeah, you know,
I have fetcham that it right done. He's gonna come
over there and said, all right, So American Idol last night, Daniel,
did you watch? I watched parts of parts of it.
Did you see Amelia Hammer Harris? Is that the girl
that was sitting at the piano with all the tattoos?
I know that's effing. Her name is effing excuse me,
(26:31):
no, no no, no, for real, her name is effing. I
swear was fantastic us your name, Amelia Hammer Harris? How
old are you so? Do you come from musical family
with Yes, my father wrote like a lot of songs
from the sixties and anything we know. Yes, he wrote
great Balls of Fire? What iconic? So what did they
(26:54):
say after that? They were impressed? Here? I keep going,
it's great, Grandam, come down. I need that leash like
on a dog. Seriously, you can't let your dog go
too far. I didn't do you come from musical family. Yes,
(27:19):
my father wrote like a lot of songs from the
sixties and seventies anything we know. Yes, he wrote Great
Balls of Fire and he wrote Don't Talk back t Yeah,
it's just a shot high, it's just a yeah. It's
(27:45):
kind of interesting to see, you know, musical history kind
of play out on American Idol, and who knows what
she could do. My problem with Idol though, they just
need to take away guitars from everyone. Everyone in their
mother plays from the show. You know what should do
when when they get shot? We do Greg t fetch Ham.
When we get to the finals, we should choose a
name randomly and then those are the you know, like, well,
(28:07):
choose like a fantasy the finals of what Idol? I
don't watch American Idol. Really, we'll do it. We'll do
a fantasy American Idol. It's like March Madness. No one
watches March Madness. And then we'll see and well, yeah, exactly,
that'd be great, all right. So SNL Bill Hayter, former
cast member sel came back and brought back some of
his old characters like Stefan. Do you watch that? Do
you watch just on the life? No, I don't like
(28:28):
this unless Justin Timberlake is on it. When Justin Timberlake
is on it, then I like it. You really don't
want what are you looking for her to turn around
and say, nope, nope. I really only find it funny
when um jessin Timberlakes on it. Really yeah, we could talk,
It's fine. I don't know. I get business to do. Gary,
(28:50):
We're doing fetch Ham. I'm sorry, what's what are you
doing something on the tell everybody, tell everybodybody that's we
got some beautiful pastries in here, and I just wanted
permission to put them in the hallway because people are
licking the glass and salivating. Shout about where do we
get the Patriots from Alfonso's Bakery and stand Alan very nice?
(29:13):
All right, thanks man, Thank you guys, as you were.
I didn't mean to. I don't even know what we're
talking about America, so anyway, so yeah, yeah, alright, so
Bill Hater from starting Alone and Daniel does not watch. Yes,
if you're Irish, we're just white and violent. I think
Patty's place for you. New York's hottest Irish club is
(29:35):
off the Church, located in the clogged heart of the
Bronx at the corner of three thousand Streets and Gary
Marshall Memorial Drive. This gang ridden skateboard park was the
ceremony spot for Verne Troyers two thousand and four weddings.
(29:57):
Why is that funny? Like, I don't even think that's
funny at all to stuff on it's funny. It's more
of a visual where he's a guy that is a
club guy that has all these crazy clubs in New
York City that he goes to, So he pretty much
invents clubs in his head that when he's on there,
so he's more improv Your assignment for next week is
to watch a certain way. We want to get your thoughts.
(30:17):
It's just going to be on He makes it very
funny town next week, so maybe he will be on
the DR and just watch a couple of minutes and
give us your feelings of it a couple of minutes.
I'm excited, though. I think has Chadwick Boseman and Cardi
b That's an episode I'll watching it. Is that one.
I think I'll watch that one. Daniel watching Sign me that?
(30:38):
Sign me up for that one down. I'm gonna check
back with our homework assignment. You can't give me homework
we're gonna do? What are you gonna do? The podcast?
You're not a teacher. If she doesn't do it, I
will make her rite on the Black corch. I will
watch our net live. And then after she writes it
and doesn't watch it, what's going to happen? Nothing? Yeah,
there we go all on so great tea. You have
(31:00):
played a leprechn before on on the radio from Tom
Let's hear that Irish accent. But yeah, how you there
we go just like thatsh now try it. I can't
howld you do it? I cannot do it. If I'm
not going to try, I can't do it. You have
to were you stopping? I'm leaving. I'm getting up and leaving.
(31:22):
That's too for Daniel doing that. By the way, So
John John Oliver played a montage of all the local
news reporters across the country trying to relate to it
being St Patrick's day by doing fake bad Irish accent.
Who can relate tolf of the morning of the morning
to you up on the morning for you sorry get
(31:44):
it now morning? Where my lucky child? They're always stealing
me lucky charms? That was better though. British luck at
the Irish and that was that a good access look
at the Irish top of the morning til we occurred
for you. You're doing paying for God. Nobody can do it.
(32:07):
I'm not about the only one. But this is kind
of cool. Nate does a pretty good one. He does
very good voices. He really does so over the weekend
this just came out. So if you know the story,
that's the only thing that's really produced that that we have.
Nothing else always done his bullshit and the week we
did we need to come up with. If you know,
(32:29):
that's three times. So if you know the story of
John F. Kennedy, right, Daniel, he was on his way
to give a speech. Unfortunately he was assassinated in the
United States government conspiracy number three. That is a fact.
That is a fact. Keep notes, that is a fact.
What old country took them out? I don't care what
someone did was they took the speech that John F.
(32:49):
Kennedy was going to give that day, found all the
speeches that he has gave before that speech, put them
all together to form the speech he was supposed to
give the day he was assassinated. World of complex and
continuing problems in a world full of frustrations and irritations.
American leadership must be guided by the lights of the
(33:11):
blurning and reason. And that was by a computer computer. Wow, man,
look how computers are gonna run the world. What did
they do with the actual speech that he had written?
That he must be somewhere They had it because they
put it together, So it has to be, you know, somewhere.
I'm guessing the Smithsonian took him out or it's in
the White House and Monroe, see Merril Monroe. I'm kind
(33:32):
of with you there, but there's so much pay there
so that I don't believe that that was innocent. You
know what I was just reading. Knew too much seriously
to jump on the conspiracy bandwagon and and not to
go deep into politics. You know, I would like to
have that kind of spooky music there. I mean, why
do you do that? You think you put me out there?
(33:53):
You tell me to walk the point we should We're
going to play a drinking game. Every time he says
fedge in the by cast, you can take a shot
everyone out there, because it's the only definite at homes
of you. Really, is that why it's it's it's green.
Don't tell anybody that you're drinking at work. It's mostly water.
(34:14):
It's you have a problem, you have an issue. You
have lots of issues. We need to talk. I worry
about you. But you know what I was just talking about,
we're talking about conspiracy is real quick. The story just
came out. So Ivanka Trump and her husband Jared Kushner
(34:35):
were on a government helicopter and there was engine failure.
Already it begins. I'm just saying, form your own conspiracy.
But that's kind of like, it's kind of interesting though. Okay,
no political talk of fetch him. I'm not doing Emerson walking, Okay,
but yet you could say, you could say the government
killed JFK. That's different. That's a conspiracy. That's different to
(34:58):
the Trumps. Just politically, did not yell. You're yelling a
lot about politics. No politics, okay, so no politics. So
Danielle contributed to the show. I just contributed to the show,
fellowing up that these alcohol in his water. Well, okay, listen,
are here we go feed him sports news. Hold on,
here we go, fed Jim sports news. Are you guys,
(35:21):
are you guys playing in the brackets now? No, because
you never brought him in for us to to use.
There's been so many upsets it's crazy. Yesterday, like all
the everything was upset this weekend. You guys don't follow
college basketball. No, I don't know why. I'm going to time. Okay, great,
se go ahead and name the starting five for for Duke,
(35:41):
for duke for duke. What about what about Michigan? They
had a big upset the other night, SAP five in
Michigan fire. That was that was almost twenty years ago.
You would see was Michael Jordan's Yeah again, almost twenty
five years. I'm gonna get you. So do not throw
stone houses when you think yourself cannot know what. I think.
(36:03):
We're done here for the day. But you know what
I do. Want to throw stones in glass houses? Almost
what's gonna happen? Don't you think they're a thick glass
or thing glass? What are you even say? I'm just kidding. Okay,
thank you guys for listening for what I do. I
do one question though, for real, no lie um my
one question regarding what we could do here is I
was watching a for real, I was watching a infomercial
(36:26):
and they were discussing this this vacuum the shark ion
Flex that's not a sponsor and don't do it anything
at all. I'm wondering, can we get some of these
items that we see these infomercials and then try it
for ourselves and see if the stuff really works? I
guess we could. Yeah, why not? Why not? Oh you
mean like us, go buy it and then bring it
in and like as a as scene on TV sexactly.
(36:50):
I like that that'd be fun. Okay, So you go
buy the first thing and bring it in next Okay,
So I'm gonna take it again. I'm gonna buy this
one that's right at the idea from the vacuum the
shark ion Flex. Because I'm the infomercial. They've got like
piles and poles, like I'm like, cat, what do you
call that stuff to pat hair? Cat litter? And they're
like chucking it up? So what are you gonna bring
(37:13):
in here? And are you gonna done something on are
and just run this sucker through? So we really do
need a visual on a podcast as well. We'll film
some stuff, okay, Yeah, and then you're in charge next
week of bringing in this scene on TV for the
second give me homework assignment. Yes, I'm giving you a
homework assignment now, Greg homeworker infomercial forget very for commercial stuff.
(37:37):
All right, I got you, no problem, That's what I'm
gonna do. All right. Well, listen, ladies and gentlemen, thank
you so much for putting up with us. Thanks right.
This has been our very first podcast, hopefully not the last,
and we do hope that you've enjoyed it or maybe not.
Please at fetch Ham official on Twitter on Instagram. There
and how do we spell that champ f e jy him.
(38:01):
I don't know, but maybe it's with one M, not
too yes eek Greg dia M e j h a M.
John Ham, Okay, but that's that's not a person, that's
a person. John. You know, you guys are such vedges gods.
(38:22):
Thank you all right, thank you for listening or whatever
to fetch Ham. We love you, don't We have to
have more than one episode in order for them to
put it up, but I like it. It was very lighthearted.
It was very lighthearted.
Headphones one, two, five. Okay, all right, today's March nine.
You guys ready ready? Episode one fetch Ham? Are you ready?
What did he say? What did they say? What does
she say? You're having a good day in fetch Ham?
(00:27):
You know, I don't like the way he says that
the end is fetch Ham. How do you already have
a problem? We did? This is our first podcast. We've
not even been here for two seconds and you're already complaining. Well,
because the way that the voice guy said at the end,
like you know that would be Stacks, not the voice guy.
I'm just saying fedch Ham. You know you should be like,
(00:48):
there's fetch Ham. Okay, I think it's fine. Do you
think it's fine? I think it's fine. Al Right, guys,
welcome to episode one to fetch Ham. It is March
the nineteen. I'm great t We got Daniel Mnaire and
of course we've got Garret. You guys will definitely know
us from the five am pre morning show. That's only
if you listen to New York Which one you said?
(01:10):
Tell me I haven't the yeah you got? You gotta
turn it down a little bit. Why don't ask questions?
Just follow because I will explain everything to you, but
then you'll be You'll it'll go in one year out
the other like it already did ten minutes ago. It
was the first thing I said before we hit start listen,
(01:31):
please lower the bed. Okay, here's here's what everybody has
to understand. So we're in the studio. Now, that's not
here's the five Am pre Morningshaw studio, and nor is
that the Elvis Story Morningshow studio. So when I walked
in here, Danielle Garret's like, hey, man, I'm gonna need
to sit there and work the board. And I'm like, dude,
what are you talking about on the five AM show?
Because you know it's been Here's the thing. He knows
(01:53):
you're gonna have over modulation. The beds are not gonna work,
the sound's gonna be off. You know that is all
on your concerned. And my first direction to him was, hey,
when you start the intro to to this, just lower
the bed a little bit so our voices could be
heard over the music. Maybe it's like an education. This
is this is what's called the bed ladies. Yes, So
(02:15):
what Greg t does is keeps the level where it
is already. First direction. Well, what I want to know
is this, Garrett, if I see because now what what
the audience also doesn't know is that in front of me,
I see these digital lights and they go from green
to yellow to red. When it goes to red, it
means that the music is too loud. Correct, So when
(02:37):
they never they never go to red. It doesn't matter
when it goes to red or not. But when you
keep the levels at a certain spot, like when you
start it and don't fade it down, the level stay
where it is, and our voices stay where it is.
So to hear our voices, you have to lower the music.
You know, you're such a veedge? What does that mean?
It start? You call a podcast that, then you start
(02:59):
you the way you delivered it. I'll take it as
an insult. We don't know what it means. Danielle has
asked me before. What were you asking me? Danielle, We're
gonna do fed to the week? And I said, well,
fed to the week? Should that be a positive or
negative person? And he said I don't know. I don't so,
daniel if you go, hey, we have the FECh of
the week, I will take that as a positive. The
(03:19):
fedge of the week. The way the way Shrek over
here just delivered that's not nice. The way he just
delivered fedge towards my direction it was I'll take it
as a negative. Two things. One, if you do a
side by side of means Shrek, I admit there is
a resemblance. Why are we going off the rails already?
We haven't even been talking for like six seven minutes.
(03:40):
Welcome to fedg Ham, Danielle, take control of this, okay,
So what is fedg Ham? Honestly we don't know. We
do a pre show together in New York on the
lead into the Elvis during morning show, and some people
have said to us, you guys should talk more, and
I'm like, well, we only have that platform. So we
decided to talk more and give you fedge Ham. But
(04:01):
we really couldn't think of what to call the podcast,
and so Greg T came up with f e j Ham.
So it's fedg Ham. Honestly, we couldn't tell you what
it means, but it's basically the three of us sitting around.
We went out on a limb. And of course Gregg
T's very good at this. When he's excited about something,
he he wants to tell the masses. He's not about
(04:24):
the element of surprise. If he was working with Beyonce's team,
he would be fired already because Beyonce says, Hey, I
want to drop an album no one knows about, but
Gregg T would tell everybody. So once we decided to
do fedg Ham, gregg T decides to go on a
radio where a few people listen to to our to
one in the morning before we start the Elvis Duranto.
You know what, here's the other thing that people are
(04:45):
if they don't know, they're listening right now for the
first time. So yeah, So, even though the Elvis duran
Morning Show is syndicated across the country, unlike close to
a hundred radio stations, there is a station that carries
us right here in New York City are our home base,
and we have a five am lead in show. So
we go on at six am New York time. We
(05:06):
go on to do a five am show here in
New York. So great to talking to the New York,
New Jersey, Connecticut. Yes. Great T decides to give out
the name of the podcast where a year ago we
haven't even started yet. Jam the idea we've been talking
about this for over a year the idea was born,
(05:26):
nothing has come together yet. So he goes out, he
spells it on the radio. Someone someone took mostly all
the social media accounts for fedge Hams, so now you
can follow us on Instagram and on Twitter. It's at
fedg ham Official, f E J Ham Official at fedgeham
(05:48):
official official. Yes, because somebody, Well here's the other thing.
If you listen and you hear Greg t very excited
about something, the reality is it's still months away from happening.
So so when he comes out and says, hey, I
got this thing, we're still the idea literally just probably
came to us no more than ten seconds prior to
(06:08):
you know, guys, I'm in the room here. I feel
like a third person. I feel like, you know, you're
like you're talking about it, but I'm here, and I
think we're on here. We're going to discuss lots of things.
We're definitely going to throw in some conspiracy theories because
you know, Greg Tea's all about conspiracy theories that picked
up on the Chicken have been begging not to do it.
But see, originally I wanted to do a podcast called
Conspiracy Theories, and we were going to do that, and
(06:30):
people wanted that. People because it started with tease conspiracy
with chicken. He is totally convinced that chicken. It's a
lot of proof. Now, okay, it start, don't explain it
quickly about your chicken conspiracy. It was one day I
was sitting in traffic and on the right of me
(06:53):
were all these like stores, these strip malls, you know,
and they all were like, you know, they're all food
stores that I've ever even heard of before, right, and
they all had chicken in them. There were supplying chicken,
so adorned on me. There's a very common food. Yes,
if everybody is selling chicken, even your local gas station,
you can run in and go get a chicken sandwich.
There's so much, so many people, there's not enough chicken
(07:16):
to be had. So he thinks that's what is it
manufactured chicken in factories that you know, in places that
we can't go to. The government is making chicken fake chicken.
You never know, he could be true, could be he
could be onto something because how can you possibly go
to all these different places and ask for chicken and
they all have it. Have you ever been to a
place where chicken was sold out No. I guess well no,
(07:39):
but I actually have been to restaurants where they've running
run out of chicken. I swear to you, with the
chicken is no longer available. That's what they said, already
poking holes in your theories. The thing is is that
there's if if my kids and your kids and Garret
kids ever eating damn chicken. We have chickens everywhere. You
(08:00):
wouldn't be able to run away from chickens. You have
chickens on the sidewalk, chickens and downstairs, chickens to the
red light. You have chickens in your neighbor, in your backyard,
your chickens in So you're saying chickens would out outnumber
all of humanity in order to supply the United States
of America. You have chickens everywhere. Not the world, No,
you have chill on the world for sure, Chickens on yachts.
On chickens on yachts. I'd like to see chickens on
(08:24):
BII outside the wings maybe maybe flying and landing everywhere.
Chickens everywhere, Chickens on your roof, Chickens everywhere. In your name, Danielle,
this is the equivalent of giving a child candy right
before bedtime. Now he's all wound up. Listen all right,
So anyway, that's just a little taste. But yeah, so
that's how it all began. We were like, oh my gosh,
(08:46):
this is great. You have so many of these conspiracies.
We're gonna do a conspiracy podcast because he on the
on the Elvis de Rancho a lot of times he
gives us his wonderful conspiracies. And then he decided he
didn't want to do that podcast, and he decided he
wanted to do something else because too many people will
think I'm crazy. Too many What do you mean, think
(09:06):
I'm not crazy? Okay, I am not crazy. These are
real thoughts he did over the weekend. What did he do?
He decided to try to cut down a tree. Guess
how long it took? Four hours? You cut down a
tree yourself, a huge tree, Well it was a limb
a little four hours. Well, that's what I wanted to
do here on fed Sham. I felt like, you know,
(09:27):
Mondays are always good days for us to do the
Fedham recording. Now, w are we doing it not every week? Right? Well?
I guess we would try to do it as often
as we can Let's let's put our pinky toe into
the water before jumping into the deep end. So what
we'd like to aim for is like every Monday, we
would like to record a podcast fed sham podcast, right,
(09:48):
but who knows? I mean the things that Again, what
we have going on here is that there's so much
to do behind the microphones, behind the scenes, on the scenes, right,
Like for instance, Danielle today like what is your what's
on your Genits? Well, no, normally on a normal day,
I would after the show, I record commercials, right, then
I do right, possibly a phone tap depending on the
(10:09):
day after Elvis, which is our after Avis thinking we
do the fifteen minute morning show podcast right, Um, so
there's a lot going on, and then we might have meetings.
So it just depends on you know, today we were
very lucky because we managed to fit it in. But
it just depends. What would you have on a normal Monday.
I don't know. Come on, it's different every Monday, different
(10:31):
every Monday. Again, that's the negative. I think a fedge
can be a positive or negative. You're such a fedge,
but normally it's coming negative from him, So I have
not heard things are negative from him Daniel. You know
you look, you look at your fete today. See that's
a positive, it better positive thing. But you know, you
(10:52):
know it's funny we're talking about great t top chopping
down a tree. You know it's funny he considers his
neighbor crazy. Why so if we're gonna talk about the story,
so what happens. See, we're like all over the place.
By the way, if I was listening, I would have
turned us off. It's a big vegg and mess. You're
just gonna work it into everything. Well, if I was
(11:12):
going to go into my story about cutting the limb down,
I would want to have like a sound if I
got a chainsaw, because that's where I believe fed should
also be fedge, should be theater of the mind. We
should be able to take our audience on a journey.
So that if I'm gonna say I was in my backyard,
you know, So take down. Take that keyboard right underneath
(11:34):
by your stomach. Alright, so I have a keyboard here,
you ahead control. It's always control. F I don't know
why chainsaw chain got a type into the computer. And
this is live, this is real deal. This isn't live.
We're recording it. Later. You know, no, see this it
says guy pranking a friend with a chainsaw. Let's say,
didn't say chainsaw effect. Maybe we should have planned this
(11:57):
before we open. That sounds fun. That would be a
real show. This is fedge Ham. We don't do that here.
We don't fetch him. I don't think people come here
for like a real show. They're coming here to be
a fedge. Oh my gosh, this is why I wanted
to be where he's sitting. I know, yeah, exactly. So. So,
so we're in the backyard because this nor easter blew through.
(12:20):
Let youn't find it right now? What easter blew through
the two weeks ago, I think, like this weekend. I'm like,
what are you talking about? No, So then what happened was,
so we have these ginormous pine trees in my yard,
you knowinous, like like Colorado put a number on it,
put a number on it. These things got to be
like eight feet tall maybe I'm sorry stories eight stories tall.
(12:44):
Ginormous is eight feet tall, eight stories, eight stories tall.
They're massive. So the nor easter blew through, and all
the weight was weighing on some of these limbs, and
the limb just woom, and it cracked down and it
fell half into the forest and half onto my my property.
So when happen it was? I said to my neighbor,
I said, hey, Glenn, come over and look at this thing.
You think we can cut this ourselves? Or should I
(13:05):
call a tree company? And he came over to look
at it. Now, we could do it. We could do it.
He's one of those I could do it. Okay, So
what happens preface you you think your neighbor is crazy.
I think he's crazy because because he which is ironic. Well,
he's one of these people who thinks he could do
everything no matter what it is. It familiar. No, I'm
not like that. So he comes over at noontime on Saturday.
(13:29):
We finished four fifteen. Let me tell you something comes over.
It comes over this limit is this from history? My
tree gives something out into his yard. He's been four
hours helping you out. I hope you got the guy
a beer. Well, my gift card after gatorade. I paid
his kid. His son was there too. I give us
sons three dollars twelve years old, four hours worth of work,
(13:52):
twelve year old kid. How much you gonna give it
twelve year a kid. How much did you give a
twelve year Fifty bucks would have been good. I don't know.
But you pay your barber or than you paid the
kid that did manual labor in your yard. That's good
point we'll get to another day. But so anyway, so
we started with the chainsaw right, and we got the
ear gear on right, and I'm like, god, I'll do
(14:13):
to the side that you're cutting them brack and everything's
cracking and everything. By two o'clock we must add three
or four ft of brush. Like it was so big
that like we couldn't even we were surrounding ourselves in brush.
It was unbelievable. So finally we got it all done,
brought out to the curb, and the good thing about
where I live, the community comes by and they pick
(14:33):
it up, which is awesome. Twice a year they do it.
So my my next day to come to do it
is uh March, They're coming to pick it up, so
hopefully they come. But why did it take four hours?
Four four hours fifteen minutes? Why took forever? This thing
was massive? No, it was not like a little limb.
With this thing, the size of the limb is equal
(14:54):
to like it could have been two and a half
feet in diameter. I swear to god massive. Did you
hit anybody with the limb? Did the limb fall on nobody? No? No, no,
it was It was on the ground already. We were
very nervous that it might roll on top of us
because the way it was sitting was sitting on top
of a knowledge. So what did you do? Cut it
in pieces? And are you using it for firewood? No?
(15:15):
Take out the curb. I don't know fireplace, so you don't.
I do. We don't use it house with the fireplace.
Why wouldn't you use the fireplace in your house that
you crap this in there? Are you serious? So I
have candles in it? Oh? Candles would kill for a
(15:36):
house with a fireplace, And you don't use it? No,
because I have candles and it looks much nicer a
little candle lab run there. It looks nice. It's clean,
It's all beautifully clean, and stare at the candles. Tease
if you don't know, tease one of those people that
his house has to be. If he came to my house,
he would probably vomit because certain parts of my house
I have so much crap that I need to go
(15:57):
through and clean out nice and clean, like my bedroom.
Yesterday I was sitting there, coming what are all these
boxes stuff? We have a lot of boxes stacked up
that I have to go through Amazon on them. You
know those are all open. And he also has he's
got some O C D. We all do. I have
a little. I have O C D as well. But
(16:19):
Queen wait has to have his hangers a certain distance
apart in his closet. What is it? How far apart
is thumb between each other? What do you think in
his closet? Where do you think it came from? I
feel like Elvis put you guys up to No, he didn't.
He didn't even know we're doing fedge haam today. My
conspiracy is that Elvis talk. He took you guys. He said, listen,
(16:41):
here's a new conspiracy. Here's another one. He is not
going to go to a shrink, so be his friends.
But not a shrink. That's not nice for him to shrink.
It's a therapist or psychiatrist. There's a shrink. A lot
of people see them because we all could use somebody
to talk to you being such a fedge. I'm the
see that was only episode one. Here's a score card
(17:04):
if you're playing at home, So I want you to
keep tracking. Conspiracy is great. Tea comes up and every
time Danielle says I'm done, I'm walking out of here,
and one go ahead. This conspiracy. So your your conspiracy
is that Elvis put us up to this here in
the making. Elvis told told you guys in the making.
Try to get him to open up and like talk
(17:26):
about what's going on in his life, and then it'll
like be a the it will be a therapy session.
Trust me, I know not to go there. You are
doctors fedge Hams, and I'm here to talk to you
guys about my problem. No way. Well, okay, so anyway,
enough about me. What did you guys do over the weekend.
I went to a wrestling event on us on Friday
night at Madison Square Guarden. I mean, give it for
(17:50):
what it is. Yes, it is fake, beyond fake. But
did you sit close? Because when you sit close you
can see how fake. It's better on TV personally, but
but when you're there with a bunch of friends and
there's nothing to worry about except for who's getting the
next beer. By the end of the night, you start
believing that it's real and you started. I messed up.
(18:11):
I'm sorry starting Take a good look, Cleveland, because this
is what a world championship looks like. Trying to idiot
face over. There's never gonna bring you a title that
that wasn't from Friday. He was just trying to relate.
He was trying to relate. I'm trying remember one album. Yeah,
(18:38):
so so I did that and then uh Saturday with St.
Patrick's Day? So wait, you are you are driving the
Titanic right now searching for something with a white What
(18:58):
did I say yes to? Why did I agree to
do this podcast? Because we're a bunch of fetg is
gonna be a big fetge and mess? Oh my god,
Hold on a second, there's some good stuff here. I'm
not even kidding you. Wait, where's my words? My Irish stuff?
I love? I played it from the other over the weekend.
What did I do? So? I had my family over
because my son's birthdays at the end of the month,
the family, Do you have a happy Fritnday? No, we're
(19:21):
past St. Patrick's. That's not even Irish. Do you know
it's gonna sound like Irish? That sounds like Irish. Come on,
this is Irish. It's that's full Irish. That's not the
Irish I'm talking about. I'm sorry, I didn't know you
were thesh. I think we've been talking too long. How
(19:45):
long is this podcast? As great tea searches for stuff?
So Danielle the family came over exactly. We had a
nice day with the family. Um what else did I
do this weekend? We watched a couple of movies at home.
We have, oh, A couple of friends came over. Because
I did not watch Jumanji. We actually watched some kids
movie a different we all Ferdinand. We were going to
(20:07):
watch It's okay, we were going to watch Jumanji, but
I didn't have enough time. But John Cena is the
voice of Ferdinand. It was cute. I mean it was
you know. I felt like, um, I felt like parts
of it were too much for kids, to be honest,
if you haven't seen it, yeah, because it's bullfighting, and
(20:28):
you know, if the bull doesn't do well, it goes
to anything. And then there was half of the half
of the movie they're trying to save their other friend
from the slaughterhouse. It's like, I don't know that this
is the problem. We give you a toy. I just
found my We're onto the next subject and he's gonna
Now he's gonna come up with the music. Here's the
here's yeah, listen to this. Do us from St Patrick's
(20:53):
day to hear that this is the worms? Don't want
to be here? Kicks into the coast of this podcast. So, guys,
(21:14):
we promised that not every podcast I'll be like this.
I think we just had to get one out there.
But we promise that this is fun. We will do
more and actually we'll come up with segments. Wait, we
will do fed to the Week. Do we have an
email address yet? You were supposed to put that together something? Wait,
(21:34):
you know what, Hold on, I want to tell you
something about the segments. So when you do fed you
the Week. Yeah, I've got music for you ready already,
So like, come up with who would you do for
fedge the week? Right now? I don't know. It's the Monday,
so they don't have a fed to the weekend? Could
be anything good or bad? Um, Garrett, help me with this.
Let's see fed of the week. Anybody I would say
(21:56):
logic logic, Well I logic depends on what's going on.
Who you want to use, I'll use that grandmother. Who's
the who's the double A team? The sixteenth bracket U
m C. They had that none that was pretty much
went to every game. Yeah. I don't know the whole
story about her though. Okay, so only stories that you're
(22:19):
from this podcast? Are you talking about CBS March Madness?
Here we go. Can we make let's make the Backstreet
Boys the Fedge of the week. Okay, okay, so wait,
so right, but there's a positive fedge, so right now
we can't say if it's positive. We're all laughing about
(22:40):
something just happened, right, all laughing? That's awesome. All right,
It's now time for Fedge of the Week. Now we
got Danielle. This is the music we alright, guys, we're
gonna get the Fedge of the Week to the Backstreet Boys.
And why are we doing this? Well because Backstreet's back, baby,
and they're actually doing a whole one two other things.
(23:01):
Right now. They're opening a restaurant called Backstreet Barbecue. They
just decided that they're going to start this. They also
want to go into the tequila business once they find
a partner in Mexico. The Backstreet expanding from music, doing
other things together, trying to make some more cash. So barbecue, yes,
I would, of course I would back Street barbecue, would
(23:22):
I don't think so. I ate stake that Greg t
cooked on his bare butt, George Foreman grill, I ate
a fees. Yes, the bar is low for me, so yes.
So that that's why we're giving Backstreet the offecte of
the week. Congratulations branding business to the Backstreet Boys. I
gotta tell you, I will not criticize her if she's
(23:43):
if Danielle picks backstret the week, it is what Danielle said,
it is what it is. That's why I will not
criticize Danielle's fed. That's how we're starting. So Okay, we're
gonna do other things too, but at least we have
we already have one segment that to the week. The
week you go back to the first one for Danielle.
What do we two segments? What's the other one? We
(24:09):
have Garrett's Fetch News? What I let him create the name?
What do you do for FS? Well, let's recap. Let's
recap you know some stuff that's happened over the last
few days. I think goes I got a segment. I go,
what's your segment? He goes, fetch news. I didn't say
fetch news. I let him create it. But you know, so,
(24:30):
so this being Monday, what's the date, March March nineteen
March nineteen. So there's been, you know, a ton of
music that's always been released. But are you always curious
what music was number one? You know, almost maybe forty
years ago. So let's go through the last almost forty
years of number one's right here, okay, we're doing all
forty this sorry, here you go, Oh my god, number
(24:55):
one this week in music history. Years love that song? Right?
Five years ago, nine eight three? Really thirty years ago,
that's such a great sive years ago nine a right,
(25:23):
twenty years ago, twenty years ago, fifty years ago, two
thousand three. We'd be ten years ago two thousand eight,
five years ago, two thousand thirteen, remember that when we
(25:44):
all sat here in Harlem sad? All right, back to
the new it's five years ago, all right, back to
French one year ago, two thousand seventeen. Yeah, in love
with the shape you there you go. That's cool, Gary, right,
going back in history, So let's talk it on her.
He doesn't bring it to the five am show. But
he's got this for fed Champ. I said to my go, dude,
(26:07):
I go all these years during the five am pre show,
you couldn't have brought that to me. I would have
loved to have played that. He's like, yeah, you know,
I have fetcham that it right done. He's gonna come
over there and said, all right, So American Idol last night, Daniel,
did you watch? I watched parts of parts of it.
Did you see Amelia Hammer Harris? Is that the girl
that was sitting at the piano with all the tattoos?
I know that's effing. Her name is effing excuse me,
(26:31):
no, no no, no, for real, her name is effing. I
swear was fantastic us your name, Amelia Hammer Harris? How
old are you so? Do you come from musical family
with Yes, my father wrote like a lot of songs
from the sixties and anything we know. Yes, he wrote
great Balls of Fire? What iconic? So what did they
(26:54):
say after that? They were impressed? Here? I keep going,
it's great, Grandam, come down. I need that leash like
on a dog. Seriously, you can't let your dog go
too far. I didn't do you come from musical family. Yes,
(27:19):
my father wrote like a lot of songs from the
sixties and seventies anything we know. Yes, he wrote Great
Balls of Fire and he wrote Don't Talk back t Yeah,
it's just a shot high, it's just a yeah. It's
(27:45):
kind of interesting to see, you know, musical history kind
of play out on American Idol, and who knows what
she could do. My problem with Idol though, they just
need to take away guitars from everyone. Everyone in their
mother plays from the show. You know what should do
when when they get shot? We do Greg t fetch Ham.
When we get to the finals, we should choose a
name randomly and then those are the you know, like, well,
(28:07):
choose like a fantasy the finals of what Idol? I
don't watch American Idol. Really, we'll do it. We'll do
a fantasy American Idol. It's like March Madness. No one
watches March Madness. And then we'll see and well, yeah, exactly,
that'd be great, all right. So SNL Bill Hayter, former
cast member sel came back and brought back some of
his old characters like Stefan. Do you watch that? Do
you watch just on the life? No, I don't like
(28:28):
this unless Justin Timberlake is on it. When Justin Timberlake
is on it, then I like it. You really don't
want what are you looking for her to turn around
and say, nope, nope. I really only find it funny
when um jessin Timberlakes on it. Really yeah, we could talk,
It's fine. I don't know. I get business to do. Gary,
(28:50):
We're doing fetch Ham. I'm sorry, what's what are you
doing something on the tell everybody, tell everybodybody that's we
got some beautiful pastries in here, and I just wanted
permission to put them in the hallway because people are
licking the glass and salivating. Shout about where do we
get the Patriots from Alfonso's Bakery and stand Alan very nice?
(29:13):
All right, thanks man, Thank you guys, as you were.
I didn't mean to. I don't even know what we're
talking about America, so anyway, so yeah, yeah, alright, so
Bill Hater from starting Alone and Daniel does not watch. Yes,
if you're Irish, we're just white and violent. I think
Patty's place for you. New York's hottest Irish club is
(29:35):
off the Church, located in the clogged heart of the
Bronx at the corner of three thousand Streets and Gary
Marshall Memorial Drive. This gang ridden skateboard park was the
ceremony spot for Verne Troyers two thousand and four weddings.
(29:57):
Why is that funny? Like, I don't even think that's
funny at all to stuff on it's funny. It's more
of a visual where he's a guy that is a
club guy that has all these crazy clubs in New
York City that he goes to, So he pretty much
invents clubs in his head that when he's on there,
so he's more improv Your assignment for next week is
to watch a certain way. We want to get your thoughts.
(30:17):
It's just going to be on He makes it very
funny town next week, so maybe he will be on
the DR and just watch a couple of minutes and
give us your feelings of it a couple of minutes.
I'm excited, though. I think has Chadwick Boseman and Cardi
b That's an episode I'll watching it. Is that one.
I think I'll watch that one. Daniel watching Sign me that?
(30:38):
Sign me up for that one down. I'm gonna check
back with our homework assignment. You can't give me homework
we're gonna do? What are you gonna do? The podcast?
You're not a teacher. If she doesn't do it, I
will make her rite on the Black corch. I will
watch our net live. And then after she writes it
and doesn't watch it, what's going to happen? Nothing? Yeah,
there we go all on so great tea. You have
(31:00):
played a leprechn before on on the radio from Tom
Let's hear that Irish accent. But yeah, how you there
we go just like thatsh now try it. I can't
howld you do it? I cannot do it. If I'm
not going to try, I can't do it. You have
to were you stopping? I'm leaving. I'm getting up and leaving.
(31:22):
That's too for Daniel doing that. By the way, So
John John Oliver played a montage of all the local
news reporters across the country trying to relate to it
being St Patrick's day by doing fake bad Irish accent.
Who can relate tolf of the morning of the morning
to you up on the morning for you sorry get
(31:44):
it now morning? Where my lucky child? They're always stealing
me lucky charms? That was better though. British luck at
the Irish and that was that a good access look
at the Irish top of the morning til we occurred
for you. You're doing paying for God. Nobody can do it.
(32:07):
I'm not about the only one. But this is kind
of cool. Nate does a pretty good one. He does
very good voices. He really does so over the weekend
this just came out. So if you know the story,
that's the only thing that's really produced that that we have.
Nothing else always done his bullshit and the week we
did we need to come up with. If you know,
(32:29):
that's three times. So if you know the story of
John F. Kennedy, right, Daniel, he was on his way
to give a speech. Unfortunately he was assassinated in the
United States government conspiracy number three. That is a fact.
That is a fact. Keep notes, that is a fact.
What old country took them out? I don't care what
someone did was they took the speech that John F.
(32:49):
Kennedy was going to give that day, found all the
speeches that he has gave before that speech, put them
all together to form the speech he was supposed to
give the day he was assassinated. World of complex and
continuing problems in a world full of frustrations and irritations.
American leadership must be guided by the lights of the
(33:11):
blurning and reason. And that was by a computer computer. Wow, man,
look how computers are gonna run the world. What did
they do with the actual speech that he had written?
That he must be somewhere They had it because they
put it together, So it has to be, you know, somewhere.
I'm guessing the Smithsonian took him out or it's in
the White House and Monroe, see Merril Monroe. I'm kind
(33:32):
of with you there, but there's so much pay there
so that I don't believe that that was innocent. You
know what I was just reading. Knew too much seriously
to jump on the conspiracy bandwagon and and not to
go deep into politics. You know, I would like to
have that kind of spooky music there. I mean, why
do you do that? You think you put me out there?
(33:53):
You tell me to walk the point we should We're
going to play a drinking game. Every time he says
fedge in the by cast, you can take a shot
everyone out there, because it's the only definite at homes
of you. Really, is that why it's it's it's green.
Don't tell anybody that you're drinking at work. It's mostly water.
(34:14):
It's you have a problem, you have an issue. You
have lots of issues. We need to talk. I worry
about you. But you know what I was just talking about,
we're talking about conspiracy is real quick. The story just
came out. So Ivanka Trump and her husband Jared Kushner
(34:35):
were on a government helicopter and there was engine failure.
Already it begins. I'm just saying, form your own conspiracy.
But that's kind of like, it's kind of interesting though. Okay,
no political talk of fetch him. I'm not doing Emerson walking, Okay,
but yet you could say, you could say the government
killed JFK. That's different. That's a conspiracy. That's different to
(34:58):
the Trumps. Just politically, did not yell. You're yelling a
lot about politics. No politics, okay, so no politics. So
Danielle contributed to the show. I just contributed to the show,
fellowing up that these alcohol in his water. Well, okay, listen,
are here we go feed him sports news. Hold on,
here we go, fed Jim sports news. Are you guys,
(35:21):
are you guys playing in the brackets now? No, because
you never brought him in for us to to use.
There's been so many upsets it's crazy. Yesterday, like all
the everything was upset this weekend. You guys don't follow
college basketball. No, I don't know why. I'm going to time. Okay, great,
se go ahead and name the starting five for for Duke,
(35:41):
for duke for duke. What about what about Michigan? They
had a big upset the other night, SAP five in
Michigan fire. That was that was almost twenty years ago.
You would see was Michael Jordan's Yeah again, almost twenty
five years. I'm gonna get you. So do not throw
stone houses when you think yourself cannot know what. I think.
(36:03):
We're done here for the day. But you know what
I do. Want to throw stones in glass houses? Almost
what's gonna happen? Don't you think they're a thick glass
or thing glass? What are you even say? I'm just kidding. Okay,
thank you guys for listening for what I do. I
do one question though, for real, no lie um my
one question regarding what we could do here is I
was watching a for real, I was watching a infomercial
(36:26):
and they were discussing this this vacuum the shark ion
Flex that's not a sponsor and don't do it anything
at all. I'm wondering, can we get some of these
items that we see these infomercials and then try it
for ourselves and see if the stuff really works? I
guess we could. Yeah, why not? Why not? Oh you
mean like us, go buy it and then bring it
in and like as a as scene on TV sexactly.
(36:50):
I like that that'd be fun. Okay, So you go
buy the first thing and bring it in next Okay,
So I'm gonna take it again. I'm gonna buy this
one that's right at the idea from the vacuum the
shark ion Flex. Because I'm the infomercial. They've got like
piles and poles, like I'm like, cat, what do you
call that stuff to pat hair? Cat litter? And they're
like chucking it up? So what are you gonna bring
(37:13):
in here? And are you gonna done something on are
and just run this sucker through? So we really do
need a visual on a podcast as well. We'll film
some stuff, okay, Yeah, and then you're in charge next
week of bringing in this scene on TV for the
second give me homework assignment. Yes, I'm giving you a
homework assignment now, Greg homeworker infomercial forget very for commercial stuff.
(37:37):
All right, I got you, no problem, That's what I'm
gonna do. All right. Well, listen, ladies and gentlemen, thank
you so much for putting up with us. Thanks right.
This has been our very first podcast, hopefully not the last,
and we do hope that you've enjoyed it or maybe not.
Please at fetch Ham official on Twitter on Instagram. There
and how do we spell that champ f e jy him.
(38:01):
I don't know, but maybe it's with one M, not
too yes eek Greg dia M e j h a M.
John Ham, Okay, but that's that's not a person, that's
a person. John. You know, you guys are such vedges gods.
(38:22):
Thank you all right, thank you for listening or whatever
to fetch Ham. We love you, don't We have to
have more than one episode in order for them to
put it up, but I like it. It was very lighthearted.
It was very lighthearted.
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