#255: Skeery Slept With a Man In Paris

#255: Skeery had dinner near Brody's house and didn't invite him; Brody had a "we good?" moment after paying extra for crunchy Chinese noodles; Skeery calls an old friend live on the podcast and tests him to see if he voluntarily invites Brody to an upcoming gathering- while Brody listens in; Skeery's friend crashes his room- and bed in Paris; A nasty man tries to screw Brody on ebay- but Brody gets the last laugh; Listener Talkbacks

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Start up, dot Up, start Up, Brooklyn Boys, start Up,
Brooklyn Boys, start up.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
Dot dot Up.

Speaker 1 (00:10):
They making noise, dot up, start up, dot dot up.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
Episode two fifty five, it's the Brooklyn Boys podcast. Whoa, Whoa?
Will you the voice? No else? Can I do a podcast? Nope? Nope,
not doing quiet Storm. Not doing that. That's not Quiet Storm.
And just talk about what just happened? What just happened? Well,

(00:39):
I just popped in onto your other podcast. Yeah, we're
Wreaking Volumes with Shared, Scary and Share. So explain to
people how they can see what we just did. You
guys were running long and I was tired of waiting. Yeah,
that was crazy. So even though Brodie and I do
an audio podcast, we still pop up on video, so

(00:59):
we share the same studio virtual studio that I use
for Share when we record the podcast Speaking Volumes. So
Brody was like, yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, we're over the
time limit time for me to jump on. So Brody
just busted in to the Speaking Volumes podcast like the

(01:20):
Kool Aid Man on camera. He's like, okay, oh yeah,
like the Kool Aid Man where it's a large pitcher
that breaks through a wall. But yes, I did bust in. Yes,
he busted into the podcast, which was really funny. So yeah,
so you can actually listen to that or actually watch
it's better to watch it on the shares YouTube channel.
We'll be posting links to that on my Instagram at

(01:43):
Scary Jones. And what's the name of her podcast channel.
It's us It's Speaking Volumes. So yeah, that's okay. We're
at Share Cassenza. She's got a YouTube page, so yeah,
you'll see it there. But anyway, okay, we're gonna post
I'll probably post a clip of us, the three of us,
because it's a nice crouss promote for the Brooklyn Boys.
You know, one of these days slices, Brody's gonna be like,

(02:05):
you know what, Scary, Let's do video one of these
days for the Brooklyn Boys podcast. I'm just saying, but okay, ah,
you giving me the silent treatment. Now, what are we
in the fucking fifth grade? The fifth grade? Well, you
can see my face now because we we're video you
can see my silent treatment. Yeah, but no, I'm excited.

(02:26):
Oh speaking of video. Yeah, and again there's a reason
I did the video for this. What I'm about to
mention and not our podcast s n Y, which is
Sports Net New York. It's the Mets Sports Network here
in the New York metropolitan area and if you have
it on your satellite or cable system or you stream it.
So one of our former interns, Sam, another female Sam,

(02:51):
not Sam, the producer who's still with the show, Blonde. Sam,
got a job working at SNY and she came up
with a great idea for a new show. When the
Mets have off and there's no game, let's give the
Mets fans something to watch in the meantime. So there's
a show called Mets Day Off Live and every week
they have a different two guests on the show. And

(03:13):
last week I was one of the guests along with
Jerry Blevens who used to pitch for the Mets and
the Braves and the A's. I was on with a
major league player. Where was this on TV? No, It
was a live podcast on S and Y's YouTube channel.
So you can either go to S and Y's YouTube
channel and click on lives right because if you just
go to the videos, there's other videos, but there's a

(03:34):
section for the lives, or you can go to my
Twitter where it's pinned. It's my most recent tweet or
just search for sn y and the Mets and me
and okay, good, this is great, Brodie, you're getting h Yeah.
So this video I was on for like thirty seven
minutes and I was talking baseball with the host of
the TV show and Jerry who's on Baseball Night in

(03:55):
New York and a former Major league pitcher, and me
talking about pitching. Phenomenal. That's great. Please check that out
now check expert. By the way, you didn't never played baseball?
Have you ever left a review on Yelp for a
restaurant you went to? Do you need to be a
chef to enjoy and critique food. I am a student

(04:17):
of baseball and love the ins and outs and intricate season.
So I'm knowledgeable about the Mets. And you've studied studied
the game. You've studied the game. Yes, so we talked
about baseballs. Are being ejected? Yeah? So now it was
episode two. Episode one was co hosted by a guy

(04:38):
who does a Mets YouTube blog podcast. He does a
weekly uh you know video thing and right now he
has more views on his YouTube on the on the
YouTube version than I do because everyone's watching mine on
Twitter Okay, So if you happen to click on the
YouTube link, I appreciate the views. Thank you here. You'll

(05:00):
have me back a little commercial for that. That's great.
So I don't get I didn't get paid. How is
it for free? How is your week? Has your week
been doing well? Brody? Have you been doing okay? Getting
into fights lately? Well, I had a situation at a
Chinese restaurant and I'm very excited to talk about that. Yeah,

(05:25):
I had a fight with US Postal Service. God man
having a fight with an asshole on eBay Jesus and
I had a fight with the Best Buy rewards the
vision of their credit card department. Yeah, I've had some.

Speaker 3 (05:39):
I've had.

Speaker 2 (05:39):
Your day is full of negativity, Your day is full
of angst and just having to be right. Well, it's
not about having to be right like today, I have
to when we were done with this, I have to
call Bloomingdale's. But how is it because they charged me
thirty dollars late feet when I wasn't late? Why is
it that more people rip you off than anyone I know? No,
they attempt to rip me off, but they don't okay,

(06:01):
rip off attempts. I feel like no, you're targeted at
this point. Okay, well, because I don't feel like I've
been ever, you know, not many attempts to rip me
off on my a day to day basis. Or do
I just let it roll off my shoulder easily? Do
I just think you do it? What do you do
all day? You go to work, you come home, you

(06:22):
hang around, then you go to a rooftop bar. Where
is anyone going to rip you off? And you got
to a restaurant to drink, come home? Yeah, I know, yeah,
but you don't care. You drink so much you don't
even notice. Is that what it is?

Speaker 4 (06:33):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (06:34):
When was the last time you walked into a Chinese
restaurant for takeout? And and you know what, every time
you use Uber Eats or any of those food service
problems delivery systems, you have a problem. Oh there is time, Yeah,
every time. But the best part is they've got the
best customer service because all I do is report the
problem that I got screwed, and then they give him
a money back without even dealing with a human half

(06:54):
the time, and and and prior to my teachings, you
would have let it slide. Maybe I don't know all
that shit's lie now, you know. So part of my Okay,
let me tell you. One of the things I'm having
a problem with right now is your fault. Okay, well
what is mine? You gave me something. You gave me
something to sell for you, which I posted on eBay.

(07:15):
We'll call it a flirp. You gave me this flirt
that you had unopened and new in the box. Flirt.
You say, Brody, can you sell us flirt? It's sitting
around my house. I'll give you. I'll give you. I
get a percentage. I said, yeah, I'm chilling on the
couch watching Mets games. I'll sell you flirt for you.
So I put it up and it was up for
a few weeks. I had a lower the price a

(07:36):
couple of times, and I finally sold the flirp for
fifty two dollars. And this is what I complained about
a couple of weeks ago when I was talking about
eBay ripping me off. Right, So it was twelve seventy
five to ship your flirp. Yeah, plus tax, The whole
thing was like sixty eight dollars. Okay, that's what the
total was that the buyer paid sure, and I shipped

(07:56):
it to South Carolina to some guy to enjoy the flirp. Well,
I printed the label and as soon as you print
the label on eBay, you get a tracking number, and
then when you bring it to the post office, they
will scan it and then the tracking number goes in
the system. You follow me, so far, so far, I do.

(08:16):
So most post offices have a ledge that says prepaid packages,
put them here. You don't need to wait online. You
just put the box on the shelf and when they
get to it, they scan them all and they're done, right, Okay.
So I went in on a Tuesday. It on a Tuesday,
I believe it was, let's just say, the eleventh of
the month, and I I print out the label on

(08:39):
the tenth. I went in the next day and I
dropped it on the ledge. I waved to the person
who worked there, and she was like, yep, right, there's good.
And I left. Five days later, the buyer of the
flurp messages with me on eBay and says, hey, there's
no tracking information on the FLIRP. I went and put
in the number that you gave and that eBay provided
and there's no record of So I said, all right, Well,

(09:01):
no problem. Hold tight, I'll go into the post office
tomorrow and i'll find out what's going on. When into
the post office, says, oh, we're having problems where the
tracking numbers aren't showing up on systems and a lot
of people have been complaining about that. But don't worry.
Your package is on the way. So I brote the
guy back. I said, your package is on the way.
The flip will be there any day now. He says, hey, man,

(09:23):
thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Great. So
four or five days later, he doesn't have the package.
He says, I didn't get the package. So I filed
a complaint with United Postal Service and they said we'll
take care of it. Give us until give us three days.
I told the guy. He says, all right, I'll wait
three days. I said, great, thank you for your patience.
I'm so nice to be patient. I don't know what

(09:44):
could have happened, but I mailed it. I don't know
where the package is. So then he says, all right,
I'll wait. And then two days later, after saying he'd
weighed three days, he files a report that he didn't
get the package and he wants a full refund. So
I hit him up and I said, hey man, he said,
you're gonna wait three days. Well, I counted yesterday as

(10:04):
a day, and now it's two days. I reported it.
I say, no, but the post office is investigating. Well,
I want my money or I want the item. I said,
I totally understand that. Let's see what the post office says.
But you know eBay is going to refund your money.
You're not gonna be out the money. Don't worry. And
I said, I have one hundred percent feedback. By the way,
I should say this, I've been doing eBay for over
twenty years. I have one hundred percent feedback, which I

(10:26):
put in all my posts. One hundred percent feedback. You
can trust me. I've never had a problem. I go
out of my way to be nice to everybody. It's surprisingly,
I know, yep. And so I said, look, I have
one hundred percent positive feedback. I'm a great guy. You
will get your flirp or you get your money back.
It's a win win for you. You have no to worry about. Sure,
at the worst case, I'm out the money, which means
scary is out the money, which means we're screwed. But

(10:47):
you're going to get your money back. So eBay comes
to me and says, what do you want to do.
I said, well, give him his money back if the
package isn't found by a certain day, giving you money back.
So the post office gets back to me and said,
we will have this case closed by May seventh, and
in the event that we can't find it, we'll refund
your money because you have one hundred can a lot.
This is getting really convoluted, but go for it. Okay.

(11:09):
So we're okay. So the thing closes out, he gets
his money back and I write him real quick, scary.
I say, hey, sorry, this didn't work out. Sorry they
lost your package. Good luck getting your next package. Have
a wonderful weekend. He goes, hey, man, same to you,
thanks for being so cool. Great. An hour and a
half later, I get an alert on my phone. You

(11:29):
have received negative feedback. This guy left me a negative
review on eBay because of your flurp, even though I
was nice to him. So I wrote him back. I said, hey, man,
why'd you leave me a negative comment? Yay, have a
nice weekend, so nice. Everybody's great, and he goes, well,
I didn't get my item. I don't know you could
be scamming me. What So now I have a ninety

(11:52):
point nine rating. It went down. My rating's ruined. So
I wrote him back and I said, I said, hey man, wait,
I thought the transaction was complete, right, So I said,
hey man, listen, you got your money back. I wish
you good luck. You know, I went to the post
office twice. I reported it to the post I did
everything I was supposed to do. Can you please change
your response back? You're ruining my selling ability, he wrote,

(12:15):
I see no evidence of anything other than wrongdoing on
your part, and until you can prove to me the
post Office is taking responsibility, I refuse to change my
review of you. Well, fuck you. So I called eBay
and I said, hey, this guy's being a prick to me.
You can look at our messages and see how nice
I was right, and see how I'm polite. And I

(12:36):
kept him informed and I said, you got to take
this off. He goes, well, we don't normally do that.
I said, this is ruining my night. You got to
So eBay went in and they went in three days,
you will be changed back to one hundred percent. So
we will strike that because he's inconsiderate. So I wrote
him back and I said, you know what, you can
take your narcissistic attitude and shove it. eBay is putting
me back to one hundred percent. So fuck you. So

(12:57):
I said, I'm glad I didn't say fuck you. I said, so,
you know what, you can keep your review. I'm glad
you didn't get the flip. Enjoy your life. Can you
imagine being such a nasty prick that you leave someone
a negative review, even though it was not my fault.
He wants me to burn You gave it. At the
end of the day, you gave him the money back.
That shows right there that that you weren't around him. Wow. Wow,

(13:20):
Fuck you Sam from South Carolina. Another Sam, Fuck you, Sam.
Imagine that I didn't care that, I said. I was
upset about it. I'm like, you got your money, but
I've been nice to you every step of the way.
I need to see proof. How can I prove to
you a negative I can't prove they lost it. I
can only tell you. So, I said, so, what are
the options? See this scary? What could have been the
other option? I paid thirteen dollars for the label and

(13:40):
I kept it. I kept the flirt and I didn't
ship it. You might as well at this point, knowing
that he's an asshole, you I keep it, you keep
it em. So where's the flirp? No idea? Where the
flip is? The Flip's gone a second. No, now that's
a fight. That's a fight. I need you to fight.
Find it with the post office. Don't they owe your money?

(14:02):
Isn't there some kind of insurance going on here? What
I said to Sam from South Carolina? I said, you
know what, For all I know, you took advantage of
the fact that there's no tracking information. You could have
received the FLIRP. You reported that you never got the flirp,
and you got your money back. I should leave a
negative review on you. But guess why EBA hasn't let
you do that anymore. You can't leave a negative review
on the buyer. You can't. You can only leave a

(14:23):
positive review. Nope, can't leave a negative view on the buyer.
Why Otherwise I would have written twelve paragraphs why? Because
they don't because they don't want you being vindictive like
I was going to be. Why Yeah, But but you
see that's where eBay is wrong, because if you were
able to leave a negative on the buyer, he would
he would think twice before leaving a negative on you,
because you guys could you guys could be vindictive to

(14:44):
each other. See this is it's unfair, unfair advantage. I
think eBay did a bad thing by taking away that
ability thing. eBay wanted buyers to feel comfortable leaving negative
reviews to the sellers to increase sellers caring more about
being good, and so there's no The downside is this
guy has no worries that I'm gonna, you know, right
back and give him negative review for being a douche.

Speaker 5 (15:06):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
Wow, it's your fault. You gave me the flip, so
it's Scary's fault. That's what I'm going on. Real, dude,
I got one more day, one more day, one more
day for my hundred percent to go back up. Otherwise
I got a problem. And then you're gonna sew more
flips from me. We'll see how this goes. Oh, I
sold your sneakers, Yes, sneakers. Sneakers are stolen. I mean,

(15:30):
I mean it's been five days and the guy hasn't
paid yet. Five days, five days and I've sent them
two reminders. What is wrong with people? There are a
bunch of trucks. What kind of people? What kind of client?
Tele is lurking on eBay these days? Does anyone does
anyone who's a slice listening still use eBay? I mean

(15:51):
are they using other things?

Speaker 5 (15:53):
Now?

Speaker 2 (15:53):
You know? It's like how there's tinder and then there's bumble,
and then there's hinge, and now Tinder is kind kind
of considered like the bottom of the barrel. The scum
of the earth is eBay. That and people have moved
on to other places to buy things because I don't know,
because honestly I don't know. It does not sound like
a good crowd of people. I wouldn't want to go

(16:15):
to that people. These people all have one hundred percent
positive feedbacks. But speaking I want to I want to
give a shout out speaking of Facebook, Kristin Marie m
A R I E. Kristin Marie, what do you know?
I sent you a video? Did you watch the video
I sent you? No? So Kristin Marie does a video.
All her videos are as an old white woman. She's

(16:36):
a young girl, but she does all her videos as
like middle aged Midwestern, not middle age like a boomer, right,
A boomer Woman is her character. So she's typing in
this video and she says, I want to sell and
she does a whole bunch of things, I want to
sell concert tickets, and then she does the old lady
responding back on Facebook. I have a hard time with

(16:58):
my ears, so I don't go to concerts and then
she then she goes, I'm gonna oh, I'd like to
get put my cat up for adoption, and she types
and then she does the old lady bitch, I'm allergic
to cats, so I'm not going to adopt your cat.
In other words, the whole video is about old people
how they have to comment on Facebook when you ask
a question. So she goes, I'm looking for a plumber,
and then she does the old lady. My son was

(17:18):
a plumber, but he died in two thousand and seven.
Just trying to be relatable, Just trying to be relatable. Yeah,
So it's she it's a great video about all the
things that people have to put up with when old
people have to comment. So all right, you know what,
let's go to commercial because I can see your face.

Speaker 4 (17:36):
And Brody.

Speaker 2 (17:38):
God, you like listen, that's my life. It was a
long situation. I understand there's a long story, but people
on eBay understand the problem. I guess giving someone negative
feedback like that, fucking no. I get it, I get it.
I understand it's and it's not right. It's not right,
it's not right. But anyway, you know, I did feel
bad that I was about five minutes from your house

(18:00):
last Saturday night and I got a phone to pick
with you. Yeah, I know, I know. Another bone slices
Brodie has another bone to pick with me. I'm gonna
let you tell the story, but when Scary comes, I'm
gonna let you finish. But best album of all time? What? Oh?
Thanks Kanye? Kanye? You just Kanye my tailor. I'm gonna

(18:23):
let you finish. But Scary over the years has often
come to the catering hall in the area nice restaurants,
and he leaves it open ended. He'll text me and say, hey, man,
I'm gonna be in your backyard, which I assume means
he's gonna jump in my pool. But he's in my neighborhood.
What do I do with that? Do I say, oh,
come over kay? What do I say? Huh?

Speaker 6 (18:45):
So?

Speaker 2 (18:45):
What happened this time? We gotta get you some barbituates. Yeah,
I'm a little wired up. You think, yeah, scary you
texted me. I'm saying, no, no, no. I felt bad
at first, but now I don't feel so bad anymore.
And I'll tell you why. So I thought twice before
calling you and letting you know that I last minute

(19:06):
planned with my Hoboken friends that we were gonna come
out to your area and go to an awesome restaurant.
And they redid the place. So I was happy to go,
and it was gonna be a fantastic time. And I'm like,
you know what, Brody's right there. Let me call him
right And then I think, wait a second, he's not
really coming to dinner with us, but let me call
him anyway and let him know. By the way, you

(19:26):
did have the opportunity to say, hey, Brody, we're gonna
be at this restaurant. You should join us. And and
I'll tell you why I didn't do that, because there's
part that's a part two to what I'm about to
tell you. It's to finish part one. So I'm thinking
about the group of guys I'm going with. He's like
six of us, and I'm like, mmm, I'm like, does
Brody fit in this friend group hard? No, he doesn't.

(19:50):
So that's strike one. Okay, strike two. These dudes are
from the school of thought is you come to you come,
you come to hang, You take a seat at the table,
you participate in eating and drinking. We're splitting the bill evenly,
no matter how much or hell littill you eat or drink.

(20:11):
And and by the way, exactly yeah, and I know you, Brody.
I'm like, Brody, Brody first of all, is not gonna
go shot for shot, drink for drink with these guys,
That's for sure. Because these guys like busting out bottles
of wine. They like to order seventeen apps, like I do.
What do you think I get that from this? I'm
like Brody's Bertie's like, I'm not gonna eat half of that,

(20:33):
there's no And these dudes don't itemize bills. This is
a day. Seven people at the table, the bill comes,
we divide it by seven, and everybody ate and drank
like kings. And if you didn't, that's on you, you know,
meaning and I know that you wouldn't have eaten half
or drank half of the stuff. Three quarters of the
stuff so that's another thing. And then the third thing,

(20:54):
and I just know this a couple a couple of
you told me you don't need to mention that a
couple of these guys have different different attitudes and mindsets.
And then I talk about other things that Brody wouldn't
you'll be able to fry. You'll be able to fry
an eggun at Brodie's head, he would have debated these

(21:14):
guys the debate. You would have just jumped in the
ring and it would have been all out of war.
So yeah, I gave you the courtesy of calling you
to let you know that I was coming to your
area because I didn't want you to find it, because
I didn't want you to find out on Instagram later
that I was gonna be in your area, like, oh,
you know, you didn't call me, You're in my backyard.

(21:35):
So I wanted to let you know ahead of time
because I knew that you'd be seeing some stories from me.
It was almost like, hey, by the way coming through,
but I'm not inviting you because of the reasons I
just gave. So then we were you preemptively. You preemptively
took care of any complaints I might have exactly, because

(21:56):
I know that this whole podcast would have been about
you bitching about the awful time that you had at
dinner with me and my friends. It would have been
great content. Plus it could have written it off because
it was for pod, the podcast the dinner off on
my taxes. It's all good. You have You have on
many occasions texted me, hey, man, I'll be in your area,

(22:18):
but you never follow it up with anything. Then I go,
what does that mean? Now? Am I a dick for
not inviting you over to my house? I feel like
am I is? He saying it? Like, so after dinner
maybe I'll stop by. I was like, oh, great, that okay.
So I was like, it's what does that mean? So
I was like so then later I was like, I
don't know, I'm supposed to invite you over. He's like, no, man,
I didn't drive, so I have to go home when

(22:38):
the guy drives me home. So I was like, I'm
off the hook. And it was at night. So my like,
you know, by the way, the pool's open, but it's
not clean yet, so you want to go in now?
It's it's green and with dirt on the bottom. I
just opened yesterday, but yeah. So, yeah, so you were
in my area and you didn't It's no, it's all good.
I forgive you on this one. Yeah, I don't need
to argue and overpay for ship as long as as

(23:00):
long as as long as you know that it didn't
come from a bad place, not like the time that
I was at a party and called you from the
party to let you know that. They would say like, Rodi,
whyn't you here? I'm like, because you didn't tell me
about it and I wasn't invited. Yeah. Oh, it's the
greatest party ever, dude, everybody's here. Everyone. I'm gonna give
you a chance. I'm gonna give you a chance to

(23:21):
join me and some old school Z E one hundred
friends at a dinner that we're going to be having
in about a month. School like sal Yeah, like Sala
and Josh and people like that. Because okay, now, because
the last time we did one of those, I also
didn't invite you. No, you didn't, you didn't. How do
you feel about it this time around? I don't know.
I'll tell you what the last time, the last two

(23:43):
times you went out with the people who worked at
Z one hundred, many many, many, many, many years ago.
I remember thinking, look, it's scary and then nice. He
kept in touch with those people from back in the
day that used to work with him, Like those guys
going back twenty years on, some of these dudes. Yeah,
now I feel like I'm gonna be one of those guys. Well,
now I'm the guy that used to work there. I'm like, oh,
I'm part of the group. Now you fit it even better.

(24:06):
I can hang out now with all the people who
don't work there anymore, Like, hey, Josh, remember what it
was like to work there? Hey, hey, that's an interesting point. Yeah,
when when I do hang out with that group of people,
not the ones that I was talking about very much,
by the way, not the people I was talking about before,
but these group of people. Yeah, it does turn into

(24:28):
that that you start waxing nostalgic on. Like, hey, remember
two thousand and two when we took the Flaming Red
Hummer and we took it down the turnpike and we
were on supersticker patrol and I called in and Frank
and you know, Frank Kenally called into the radio station
and you know, we you know whatever. I mean. It's

(24:49):
weird because we always fall down that rabbit hole, whereas
with everyone else I hang out with, we talket, we're
up in talking about current things. But I feel like
this is like frozen in time. It's like going to
that playground that that has just been abandoned and there's
rusty swings and seesaws and stuff and then just growing

(25:09):
tumbleweed everywhere, and it's just a kind of frozen in time.
Like That's what it's like hanging out with this group
of guys. Not that it's a bad thing, but I
feel like I feel like when you're out, when we're
hanging out with the current people that you work with,
talking about current stuff. Yeah, I feel like I see
a light at the end of the tunnel, like Heaven
calling me, and it's the people that used to work

(25:30):
there at fifteen years ago. Come join our group. Now
you can eat with us and talk about things nobody remembers. Yeah,
that's fine, I'll be part of that that old group.
I like those guys, and since I was there when
they worked there, they like you too. That's probably an
overstatement to clear they put up with you too. I'm sorry.

(25:52):
What No, I'm still Facebook friends and all those guys, Josh,
I go back and forth on Facebook almost three times
a week. No, it's sounds great. I've seen salop at
Serious XM when he was working there. No, that's a
good group. I'll call one right now. I should call
Josh and be like, Yo, what's the other guy's name?
He's working promotions Brandon Brandon, Bernie, Bernie Brandon mooch. Yeah,

(26:15):
I'm gonna call Josh real quick. If we get your
permission to come, we can ask him live if he
wants me to come now that, I'm gonna put him
on the spot. Hello, Well, how's everything? Man?

Speaker 4 (26:27):
Everything is great? Am I being recorded?

Speaker 2 (26:30):
No? Will I do that to you?

Speaker 4 (26:33):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (26:34):
No, I'm thinking about our old school is one hundred
dinner that we're gonna be having in about a month
or so? Yes, yeah you're going. You're going there tonight.

Speaker 4 (26:44):
I had dinner but your block tonight. Yeah. I was
there last week too.

Speaker 2 (26:48):
Yeah, you're obsessed.

Speaker 4 (26:50):
I get around.

Speaker 2 (26:51):
What who are we thinking about for this time around?

Speaker 7 (26:55):
So scary you me?

Speaker 8 (26:59):
Sal Brandon Bernie would love to get Bachelor Scottie down there.
Would love to get Greg and Cubby. I know it's
tough for Covey with with kids. I know it's tough.

Speaker 4 (27:13):
For Greg being Greg.

Speaker 8 (27:17):
Would love it if Brian's coming into town that weekend.
I know Rich is coming to town this weekend, or
he's here now so he won't be back.

Speaker 4 (27:27):
But yeah, it's the usual.

Speaker 8 (27:29):
Me, you, Sal, Bernie Brandon are the core, but would
love to bring in.

Speaker 4 (27:36):
I don't really care. Ye sucking invite Darren, you know,
I you.

Speaker 2 (27:42):
Know, okay, So you're okay with Brody, then I'll invite Brody.

Speaker 4 (27:48):
No, Brody, is he on the line with us right now?

Speaker 5 (27:52):
No?

Speaker 4 (27:53):
Can he? Can he afford it? You to answer your
podcast right now?

Speaker 2 (28:01):
I know? Is there anybody else on the planet you
could have mentioned other than me? Josh? Anybody?

Speaker 7 (28:11):
Hey?

Speaker 2 (28:12):
What about? What about let's us the guy that worked
in the mail for three hours, Wilson, the cleaning.

Speaker 8 (28:17):
Guy, Wilson, Let's get Hamilton, Let's get Bodega, Brad, what about?

Speaker 4 (28:23):
What's all the salespeople? Cuckoo, car Cuckoo, Carly.

Speaker 2 (28:29):
The vegetarian intern.

Speaker 4 (28:32):
What's TJ the DJA?

Speaker 2 (28:35):
He's got a radio show again? He does he does radio? Yeah,
you're in the Brooklyn Boys podcast, by the way.

Speaker 4 (28:42):
You know, I figured I was, you know, I asked
about you guys.

Speaker 8 (28:45):
The other day, I had a call with iHeart National advertisement,
and they're trying to sell me on podcasts. And I
asked him if anyone listens to Brooklyn boys, he.

Speaker 4 (28:54):
Goes who they are?

Speaker 2 (28:57):
Are you serious?

Speaker 4 (28:57):
I swear to God, I swear to God.

Speaker 2 (28:59):
Where one of the top iHeart podcasts? So f that guy?

Speaker 9 (29:02):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (29:02):
Wow, you're a sales guy who I will text you
his name? Had no idea? Maybe we can invite them
to the dinner.

Speaker 2 (29:13):
Wow, bro let's invite Brody's wife to dinner?

Speaker 4 (29:17):
To his wife? Actually, what about his rabbi? Brody's rabbi?

Speaker 2 (29:21):
Great guy, Brody could come to. I guess Brody could
come to.

Speaker 8 (29:26):
He had apologize to someone there for not inviting him
to Mets games years ago.

Speaker 4 (29:33):
Really yep, oh Josh, I'm sorry it wasn't me.

Speaker 2 (29:40):
Wow, Okay, Well who else was I supposed to invite
to Mets games? Brandon? I think, I think, I think
Josh is fucking But.

Speaker 8 (29:46):
Yeah, let dude, let's get a fucking table for fifteen
and let's fill it up.

Speaker 2 (29:50):
All right, That's what I did.

Speaker 8 (29:53):
I got a table for eight tonight, and then I
filled it up with like people on network with for work, David, nice,
learn from you.

Speaker 4 (30:02):
Look talk talk Mets. We suck.

Speaker 2 (30:05):
So it's safe to say you're not going to training
camp this year.

Speaker 8 (30:09):
No, I'll go to I go to Mets fantas camp
every year. This year will be number six. A.

Speaker 2 (30:14):
Yeah, I'm jealousy.

Speaker 4 (30:17):
You should come on, you get a job one day,
you should come with us.

Speaker 2 (30:20):
Yeah, I got it. Yeah, I have all the time.
I have the time to go now. But yeah, yeah,
I love you, love.

Speaker 4 (30:27):
You to listen, Josh.

Speaker 2 (30:28):
If you're hiring, let me know.

Speaker 4 (30:30):
Yeah, you don't want to work. My bus doesn't pay.

Speaker 2 (30:33):
You don't want to work for us. But thanks for you.
I've already had a job like that.

Speaker 4 (30:39):
Thanks, that's true.

Speaker 2 (30:41):
Wow, you'll have to know fury Wow Josh, Wow, that
is that is that? By the way, for the slices
that that is not coaster boy, Josh, I know you
hear the names Josh. That is it's Josh who used
to work in the afternoons and uh, big Mets fan,
big Mets fan. All right, Yeah, I don't know. I

(31:01):
feel dirty right now. I was too. He was feel
like crap. He was spilling the team. He mentioned the
phone book that was hysterical, Nah, no, Brody, and then
he's like, wait a minute, am I being reported? Am I?
That party was just being see you know, careful what
you wish for? Brody? I was gonna tell him right
up front. You were on the phone, Josh, Josh. Josh

(31:22):
was concerned that, Uh, I wouldn't want to go, but
I of course I'll go, all right, okay the Glen
Boys podcast.

Speaker 4 (31:29):
We will be right back.

Speaker 2 (31:31):
I'm trying to get my Bundy tall Darren on the phone.
But okay, is this related? Okay, before the podcast started,
Scary says to me. I said, he, Scary, is any
you want to talk about in the podcast today? Because
somebody say'll go listen. I need you to hear this
backstory before we go on the podcast. But usually he
just goes, yeah, I got a thing with a glass
of wine, and I go, okay, I'll remind you about
the wine. He says to me, we got to talk

(31:53):
about dog Penis today. What yeah, erect dog Penis? What
are you talking about? I'm gonna tease it here. I
want I wanted told Darren on the phone. Uh, We're
going to get him on shortly. But the short of
it is long talk about last week at all. We
didn't did I don't know if we teased this. I
don't think we did. Did we talk about it? I
don't think we did.

Speaker 4 (32:14):
We did?

Speaker 2 (32:15):
Did we? Did we tease it? When they have teased it?

Speaker 4 (32:19):
Well?

Speaker 2 (32:19):
Anyway, Darren told Darren joined me in Paris after my
girlfriend went home. She had to leave for the weekend,
celebrated her dad's birthday. So I spent the weekend because
it was still my vacation. You went to see the weekend. No,
I spent the weekend in Paris. So he spent the
weekend with the weekend. That sounds that sounds like a
poor No. By the way, spent the weekend in Paris,

(32:42):
so told Aaron, who now lives in London, used to
be living here. He said, fuck it, I'm gonna have
a flight. I'll join you for a couple of nights.
Part one of this is really crazy. Uh. That is
he shows up at the hotel and proceeds to did

(33:02):
he get a room on your floor? Did he get
a yeah, it's called my room. He actually he didn't
book his own room. Why not? I don't know. With money.
He's a CMO of a major company and he's like, hey,
come on here. I'm like, all right, cool, let's go.
But the thing is, my girlfriend and I were sharing
a queen size bed, so that's okay for me and

(33:24):
my girlfriend. Yeah. Well, so Darren and I were hanging
out in the hotel and uh he uh, you know
he shared a bed with me. We shared the same
bed from no no pull out? What could you clarify
really quickly what you mean by pull out? There's no
pull out, no pull out couch now, no cot, no pullout.

(33:47):
There's really no room for it. Keep in mind where
we're in the heart, the heart of Paris. And then
you know, it's like a New York City think of
a New York City size hotel. They were all a
bunch of shoe boxes, so you know, space is at
a premium. So yeah, I mean, but I thought I
couldn't even He just assumed he was going to sleep
in your queen. He goes, I guess I'm gonna crash
with you. I'm like, I cool, crash on the floor.

(34:10):
That was weird. Nah, I can't do that. Can't do
that to the guy. And we're old friends from way back.
So when I can't, I ask, is it awkward for
two grown ass men to share. Ask man, I leave
that out. He did the wall. He did the wall
of pillows, though right between the two of you, we
separated them. Let me tell you, when we were sharing
beds down the Jersey Shore, we used to do that.

(34:30):
We used to put up the fortress of pillows that
divided down the center so we can kind of make
it feel like we have our own beds. We didn't
do that anything that right now, we don't bother anymore.
We're all we're older, we're mature. But is it awkward,
because I sure as hell think thought I think it was.
I brought it up to the morning show today on
the Elvis Durantchow Crickets. Nobody found it awkward. In fact,

(34:55):
it was an awkward moment of silence where they just
like stared at me and no one said a word.
And I'm like, hello, I'm like, nobody's gonna comment on this,
So maybe I'm the crazy one. But I guess it's normal.
I guess it's normal. No, I mean up a problem
with the for two. I'm not a problem with the
two guys in bed. I don't have a problem. He
lived on the wall of pillow, because I've seen trains,

(35:16):
plans and automobiles hands wander at night. I have a
problem with a guy volunteering himself to being a queen
size bed even volunteer. I guess he was like, hey,
I'm gonna I'm gonna crash with you. I thought maybe
he was gonna get his own room, but he didn't
at the hotel, but maybe that maybe there was a
miscommunication error, but that they were sold out. They were

(35:39):
not sold out. But listen, he was saving money. So
I said, all right, well, what did he buy for you?
They say, my lunch, mesa suit, casa yeah me, hotel
is not sue hotel. Now you probably paid I don't know.
Let's just say three four hundred dollars for the room,
because so now he owes me some money for the room.

(35:59):
Is that what you said was your favor? Little something
he saved. He saved himself one hundreds of dollars took
up your space. Did you get a little little little
spooning going on anything? Those little robin tug I just
didn't know. I want to hear some talkbacks from the slices.
Is it awkward for two grown ass men again? We're
not in their twenties by any stretch of the imagination.

(36:23):
Why can't you just say you're adults? What's with the
grown ass thing? We're adults, We're two adult men. Yeah,
is there any Is there anything wrong with sharing a
bed or not? I don't think it doesn't thing. It's
the problem sharing a bed. I'm sure there's people who
shared beds with their friends. I the problem I'm having
is that he volunteered himself to No, don't even go there.
I'll stay in your room. Now, have a problem, kid.

(36:46):
The weekend came and went, and I invited him, I said,
I said, I invite in all fairness, I said, he
come and went. All right, now that's gross. What are
you doing over there? Nothing? Don'torry about me. Go I
want your story. No, it's not a story. I'm just saying,
that's it. I posed a question. I'm moving on. What
do you think this is a Brodie rant? Yeah? You

(37:08):
should have like five more minutes. You fall apart over it?
Birdi's birdies. You're you're fidgeting with your microphone over there.

Speaker 4 (37:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (37:15):
I was just tightening up the bolt on the end
because I moved the microphone and.

Speaker 9 (37:19):
It was.

Speaker 2 (37:22):
Greg Goose got the girl feeling loose. I suppose, I'm
I wouldn't do that. He's in the wrong.

Speaker 3 (37:27):
I don't.

Speaker 2 (37:27):
You don't volunteer yourself to go on someone else's room. No,
hold on, I mean, you know, in all fairness, I
did say, hey, I got nothing to do here, I'm
in town for another couple of days. I invited him.
What did you sleep in my pajamas? No? No, my
boxer shorts O boxer short of button, no button boxer button,
no button on the fly, but boxer. The boxers don't

(37:51):
have No my boxers don't. Mine don't have buttons. Some
do so shirt flapping in the way. We both had
boxes and t shirts on. It doesn't matter. You can
fall out middle of the night. Grant little grab action.
You're no, I'm just saying, scare. You and I have
shared many a hotel room on many a business trip.
Would we share a bed together? You and I know

(38:12):
we Yeah, we've always had like twin beds in the room.
If there was a mistake made, one thing to share.
If we were on a party plane or a business trip,
and they're like, oh, Broughdan's scared. You're in the room
three seven to two, and we walked in and there
was a queen sized bed. Would you be like the
fuck it?

Speaker 4 (38:27):
Ord?

Speaker 2 (38:27):
You were immediately called downstairs and get another room. I
was thinking about maybe at least getting a room with
two beds in it and switching over when he came in.
But whatever, it's okay. Well, we have a preference for
tall down you're like taller guys. Anyway, that's not the
reason why I wanted to talk to him. We'll talk
to him a little while. I know you have some
things that you wanted to get to. Uh, but yeah,

(38:48):
he has a problem with his dog, or had a
problem with his dog. Well, I'm curious as to what
the dog's penis has to do with this, because you
said we got to talk about a wrecked dog penis.
What have you said his dog's penis? You know how
dogs have retractable penises ideah, oh, king missile, that's a
big hit, the retractable that's detachable penish. Yeah, well his

(39:10):
his his dog's penis wouldn't retract it just kind of.
And and he was away and his brother in law
was watching his dog, and he got a call while
he was away saying his dog's penis wouldn't go away,
wouldn't wouldn't retract, and it's probably going to be an issue.

(39:32):
All right, Well, speaking of penis, so he needed a remedy.
So yeah, before we get him on, if I need
your opinion on something. So one of my friends, I
know him about seven eight years and uh, he's a
friend of a friend, but he's a friend of mine now.
And I want to say, about four months ago, he

(39:54):
and his wife got separated, okay, right, so he he
moved out and uh, she stayed in the house and
I was touching base with him, seeing what's up. I
think we were talking about comic Con whatever. He's a
sci fi guy, and I said, hey, man, how's it going.

(40:14):
He says, well, be honest with you. Uh, this past weekend,
my wife and I tiptoed through the tulips. Now, based
on that, what would you think he was talking about?
Had sex?

Speaker 4 (40:28):
Right?

Speaker 2 (40:28):
So I said, dude, that's awesome. You guys are working
things out. You banged your wife, that's great, And say banged.
He's like, oh, that's a little crass. No, I didn't
say that, but I was like, you know, that's fantastic.
Good for you. He's like, well, you're very excited about that.
I go, yeah, because I know that you, you know,
been on a dry spell, you separated. I know you're

(40:50):
working on things. That's great. He's like, well, is that
the kind of thing. I don't know. He's not, honestly,
you understand WHATY So I go, wait, we we're excited
for him. I'm excited that you and your wife are
having sex because we didn't have sex. What are you
talking about? He says, this past weekend, we went to
a tulip farm in Connecticut and we went walking through

(41:13):
the tulips. I was saying, we went tiptoed through the tulips.
Like what you know, you made it sound like sex.
If somebody says to you, scary, yeah, my wife and
I went tiptone through the tool Yeah. Absolutely. He's like,
that doesn't mean sex. I go, dude, if you say
any euphemism, it sounds like sex. If you're like, hey,
my wife and I did a little grocery shop, you
know what I mean, that's sex. That's sex. Hey, my

(41:33):
wife and I rearranged the closets. Any I'll tell you what.
Any euphemism anything like that guaranteed mean sex. I mean
you could whatever you say, but we fry we we
we we were frying some bacon. Yeah you're like, oh right,

(42:01):
that's what I'm saying. So slices, use the talkback feature
on on the iHeart app. I want to know what
you think, what you would have thought of if your
friend who hadn't had sex in a while was suddenly like, yeah,
my wife and I went tipped into the tubs this weekend,
or even better, leave us your talk back on what
your euphemism for sex is. Yeah, I want to. Yeah,

(42:21):
you're like, oh, park the car in the garage this weekend.
Oh you did nice. We went shopping and then we
came home and I ate the groceries. You know what
I'm saying. Well, isn't there isn't there a song that
was big on TikTok where there's a hip hop song.
She goes, I want you to eat that booty like groceries.
But you gotta eat the booty like grocery. Yeah, yeah,

(42:41):
that was still is gotta eat the booty groceries. Scary
is looking at the book because I don't want to.
Don't tweet us eat the booty like groceries. Eat what song?
We used to play that on the range Hearing did it?
She Hearing get sued for ripping met off from somebody.
It's like, what song is it? And Whee's song Taylor Swift,

(43:03):
It's it's called post to be, Oh, posed to be? Yeah,
supposed to be? It's Omarion, Chris Brown, Chris Brown and
Jenny Iako Aiko. How do you pronounce your name? Jennie
Jenny Ako? I don't know. I'm still working on Kelly
Cuoco from a big bang theory. I might let your
boy show from me, but he gotta eat the booty

(43:24):
like groceries at his poetry. That song is several years
old now, yeah, twenty fourteen, alost ten years old, but
it was big on TikTok a couple of years ago. Yeah,
we came back, came back and made a resurgence because
who the hell says that? I mean, well, Omaran Mario,
well whoever the girl is in it was a comedian
that did a riff on that too, about like what

(43:47):
it was it Chris Rock. Somebody did a whole bit
on on that line from that song. But you better
look it up now you're gonna get No, I'm not
gonna look it up. You gotta take a break, okay,
and scary. If we're not getting down on the phone,
then I should probably tell you the Chinese food restaurant story.

(44:07):
Go for it. So I went to my favorite Chinese
food takeout place, go in there for twenty years. I
call up. They hear my voice and know who I
am and how I like my food no vegetables. I
know them, I know the family. Their son started a business.
I hired him to do work on my house. I
spent a lot of money there, a lot of money.

(44:28):
They're going there forever.

Speaker 9 (44:29):
Now.

Speaker 2 (44:29):
One of the things they do on the menu, they
have little tear offs at the bottom of the side
of the menu, and as much money as you spend,
you get something for free, which who doesn't love that?
So I'm going to approximate. I don't rember the exact,
but if you spend fifteen dollars, you get a can
of soda for free. Okay, go up to refrigerator, grab
can of soda. You spend twenty dollars, you get like
a sixteen sixteen point nine ounce bottle. You spend twenty

(44:51):
five dollars and you get a free two lead a
bottle of soda. Okay, and over the years that those
numbers have gone up as the economy goes up, as
he goes south. Yeah, if you spend a certain amount
of money a lot more than they get the bottle
of soda, you get a free General Chose chicken, which

(45:14):
is like a eleven twelve dollars value. Who does love
General So's am? I right? Right? Okay? So I go
in originally a Taiwanese dish, by the way, and there
was no General so and if there was, there's no
proof he like this chicken anyway. So I go and
I order the food. I call up and order the food,
and I go and I get there, and my total

(45:36):
was forty cents short of a General Soace chicken. When
I when I go to pay the bill, she goes, oh,
go get your two lida bottle of soda. Go pick
out your soda, because she knows I qualified at the
two liter bottle range. Now I got this giant bag
of food, and I spend a lot of money and

(45:58):
I got. One of the things I got was one
time and I drop soup, no greens because you know
it's vegetables. I got a bunch of other stuff. But
I ordered a large soup. Now, when you go there
and you order a small soup, you get a bag
of noodles. When you order a large soup, get the
same bag of noodles. I always run out of noodles.
Now again, I've been going at twenty years. So I
go and get my two leada bottle of soda and

(46:19):
as she's packing me up, I ask for extra duckt sauce.
She throws it in the bag and I said, oh,
can you do me a favorite? Can I get an
extra bag of noodles? Because I always run out? She goes, oh, yeah, sure,
fifty cents. What fifty cents? So I looked at her, like,
you're gonna charge me fifty cents for a little shitty
bag of noodles when I just spent a lot of

(46:42):
money and I'm a regular customer. Wow. So I go
in my pocket. Balls, by the way, that's the kind
of shit that gets me angry, that right there. So
I'm like, what the fuck, Like it's me you could
have just thrown in there. I just spent a lot
of money. So then I go in my pocket for
the fifty cents, and I realized to myself. Wait a minute,

(47:03):
I just qualified for General SOA's chicken. So I said
to her, you know what, add the fifty cents onto
my bill. I would like a free General Soce chicken now,
so back fuck you. She looked at me and she goes, oh,
I said, no broccoli, And I looked at her and
I sweated. Guy, I went, were good the return of

(47:26):
we good? Were good, but this one was legitimate, and
this legitimate so the bag of new I wasn't gonna
You know what, when I first got the bill, I'm like, oh,
I'm forty cents short.

Speaker 7 (47:36):
You.

Speaker 2 (47:36):
I thought, I don't really need the food. I'm not
gonna be a dick about it. In order one what
I'm like, guh, leave it along. Take the soda, right,
But I cleared the soda barrier by like fifteen bucks.
So I'm like, you know, you made it to the
next level. You are locking in a higher reward. That's it.
I'm like, you're gonna charge me for the noodles. Wait
a minute, the price is right. I just reading reached

(47:56):
a new threshold. General saw me, bitch, no broccoli, So
how about that? We very good? But let me okay
that noodles cost her a general social So are you're
gonna lift up the noodles though and pull a week
good and walk out without paying? Had you not thought
she wouldn't hand them to me? She knows. She held

(48:17):
the bag up, she goes fifty cent. So I said
what I didn't? I thought she was kidding. I thought
she was gonna go haha. You paid a dime a
dime for general sos chicken with no broccoli? Yep, yep,
thank you? Do they give you more much chicken when
they delete the broccoli? Is that I'm gonna say?

Speaker 9 (48:37):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (48:37):
Although there's some places in Manhattan I've told this story.
I when I used to work in Midtown with the
Comedy Department. When we were in another building. There was
just a couple of places we used to order from.
But if I ordered like roast pork, lomino, vegetables, they
go dollar more. I go for what we gotta put
more more noodles, more noodles and pork. I go, I
don't want noodles and pork. Well, if I woulded like
chicken and cashews, no vegetables, Oh we gotta put more chicken.

Speaker 4 (48:58):
No you don't.

Speaker 2 (49:00):
I just don't want the vegetables. I always order from them.
I always felt that if you start, like, for instance,
not that you would ever do this, but if you
or if you order a salad, let's say, okay, though
I might not like a cob salad, a cob salad
with things in it like hard boiled eggs and bacon, chicken,
all this stuff. If I start, if I start saying,

(49:23):
I want, you know, instead of having or let's take
it to like a bowl, like like a poke bowl
or something that has like a rice base, like rice
instead not not not let us forget about the salad idea. God,
your stories are so long. Oh yeah, they're they're awful.
But if I if you start removing things in the base,

(49:44):
remove the salad, remove and I don't want one kind
of remove one kind of grit a salad, no salad,
yes I would do. Or you remove the rice, or
you remove the quene wat or something that bulks up
and takes a lot of space in the bowl, we
get it. I always wonder if they give you more
of the chicken, more of the protein, because they have

(50:06):
to make it look full, they have to get to
the small a bowl. They'll put it on a plate.
Then no, these places are These places are one size
plastic bowls. I'm saying. When you order a salad and
you start taking out the unnecessary things and you just
cobb salad where they put like a pie chart right
where like they put the bacon in one yeah, the

(50:27):
chicken and they egg out the bacon. Then they just
spread everything out. They don't give you more of the
other stuff. It's pretty porta. What if I take out
some salad leaves or what if I take out I
don't want rice in my you know what in my
my Chipotle bowl. I don't if I order if I
order a Ruben sandwich, which is either cornby for pastrami
Russian dressing and sala kraut and Swiss cheese, if I

(50:50):
say no, sala kraut sub tomato, they don't say, Well,
the tomatoes the same price as sala kraut. They take
the sala crowd out and they charge me with a tomato.
And in my mind, I'm going, I'm taking something out
and putting something in. Don't charge me more for that shit.
So that no one's helping you out scary. No one's like, oh,
let's get extra chicken because we saved on snow peas.
They're not doing that. I think they do because they're

(51:12):
embarrassed to hand you something that looks puny. No, no,
you don't know. Then their minds are going on. This
guy don't want to let us fuck them. I don't.
They have to fill it off to the top. It's
like a visual thing. Low maine, no lomain. And see
I'm a true's book. I get. Yeah, it's like that almost,
but not that specifically. Not. I'm talking about items that

(51:35):
have three or four ingredients in it and you remove
one of the ingredients, oh, the least expensive one, but
you keep that reminds me. Okay, no, go ahead, No
what I'm just saying. Yeah, they're gave it an empty bowl.
I put it on a plate. Just go here you go?
Is the shit you want it?

Speaker 6 (51:49):
Here?

Speaker 2 (51:49):
It is all right? I'm you know me. I like
Chinese food. I added boneless ribs as part of my meal.
Boneless ribs are like glazed over chunks of pork. I
want the pork that's in the fried rice, plain old
roast pork. I want a bucket of that. That's what
I want. How do I order that? Nobody has that
jug up pork. Yeah, the roast pork in the Low

(52:11):
Maine is the best part. I just want like a
play to that. They don't sell that. You can't get that.
That's what I want to find. I want that. I
want that. Oh you know what else I want to find?
What the fudge nut brownie from Drakes I had? I
had a craving this week. Do they still make those?
I remember them? I remember them. So Drakes was brought

(52:31):
up by Hostess, and then Hostess was brought out by
whatever company Little Debbie. Whatever company owns the Little Debbie
now owns Drake's Cakes. Well, I called him yesterday to
ask if I could find them anywhere. She says, nope,
they were discontinued. And I go, I must have missed it.
Pandemic No. Twenty thirteen. So my favorite brownies that I
used to get in every grocery store, every candy store,

(52:52):
the little little nut, the little walnut in it, little walnuts.
And then they had let that that thick layer of
chocolate you could peel off. Yes, it was like gue
each falklate. Oh yeah, they don't make that anymore. They don't.
I'm devastated. I know it took me ten years to
miss them, but now that I miss them, our Brooklyn,
our Brooklyn Intimates Entimens. Yeah, they don't make the maple
cake anymore. No, but they're coming out with Intimate's ice

(53:14):
cream sandwiches. Google them. Oh, google it right now. You're
gonna there's like three four different kinds. Oh, I'm in
for that. And with with the chocolate donut as like
the the sandwich as the sandwich donuts. The best, actually
the best cake on the planet is the Intimate's chocolate
do they're making ice cream sandwiches from Intimates Intimen's ice
Cream sandwiches. Look them up. And if you know what

(53:34):
Intimates is. It used to be a Brooklyn thing then
in turn regional and I think it's national now, right,
I think it's national. Now, Okay, that's not you need
to move. They don't make as many of the products
as they used to. They discontinue No, no, because other
companies buy them. And then they're like they trim it
down because they want to make a profit. That we
needs profits. We don't need profit. Bring back to Brownie,
you son of a bit. We need a profit, Brony,

(53:54):
we need to make profits now. No, I want to
talk dog Penis, where's your boy? Wait? We got to
take a break. We've got to make some profits, damn it.
All right, past, I'm trying to get him on the line.
All right, he's in me. We should do talkbacks at
some point, Yeah, we could do talkbacks. I don't know.
This was the segment He's like, I'll be there for

(54:16):
you guys. I'll be there for you guys. And we
keep pushing and pushing and pushing, and here we are
in our last segment and we don't have him on
the phone. Well, I teased something on the share nos
the Speaking Volumes podcast. I'm sorry, speaking Speaking Vibes might
as well be the share Nose podcast, wasn't it. What
do I get that name? Share Noses is one of
the features that she does. Oh right right, yeah yeah,

(54:38):
So I teased something on that podcast that we can
talk about this point we haven't talked about yet. It
happened on the cruise I went on with my wife
mm hm. We went to dinner at a restaurant on
the Royal Caribbean ship called Wonderland, which is all Alison
Wonderland themed, right, really good incredible food, but that they
make the food look like stuff like some of these
places that makes creative food, like they look like the

(54:59):
mush shooms like we're made out of like merangue. And
that was craziness. Anyway, So the photographer comes over. My
wife is sitting in a giant chair like an Alice
in Wonderland royal chair. And he says, oh, let me
get a picture of you two. You know what they do.
They charge you like thirty bucks for the picture if
you want it. So he goes, I'll go, I'll may
take a picture of you, you guys. So I go
around and I get on my knee so I could

(55:21):
be at the same height as my wife in the chair.
And he says to he says to my wife, He
says to me, rather, we'll get closer. Act like your
lover they you know, cuddle, act like your lover, you know,
like you know, like get romantic. So I said. So
I looked at him. You know I can do him provs.
I looked at him straight in the face. I went, sir,
this is my sister. That's kind of weird. Oh my god,
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean I

(55:45):
assumed you were a couple. Oh please, forgive me, forgive me,
forgive me, forgive me, forgive me. That's funny. And I said, no,
I'm only kidding. It's my wife. I'm only kidding. He goes, oh, oh,
you scared me. He goes, ah, I messed up once before,
and I thought I messed up again. I said, what happened?
What did you do? He said, I'm so embarrassed. I
messed up. I happened. He goes, well, there was a couple,

(56:05):
a husband and wife, and uh, she was pregnant. And
so when he got next to her for the picture,
I said, why don't you you know, uh uh do
a picture where you put your hands on the baby
and kiss the baby. And she says, I'm not pregnant.
Oh ouch. So he basically called her fat. Never assumed

(56:33):
so much pregnant never ever. Oh my god, that is
rule number one. I learned that years ago, years ago.
So he told this guy to basically kiss his wife's
pregnant belly and she's just heavy. I love that. So
he thought he fucked up again when I said, no,
she's my sister. So that's why he got like, yeah,
remember the time we were out of a play. We

(56:55):
were and we were on the street. We met a
couple of listeners and this guy was like in his
sixties and he was with a girl like in her
mid twenties, and he's like, Oh, it's great to be
out here. We're having a great time. And I'm like, oh,
so you brought your daughter to the city to the show.
That's not my daughter, that's my girlfriend. Tall foot in mouth,
the whole morning show. I did this in front of everybody. Elvis,

(57:16):
the whole crew is there, and I'm like, uh, okay,
sorry about that. Yeah, so well, all right, I did
that to someone that you know, we were at a
thing together and he and his wife had had a baby.
I want to say, a year ago, you know, to
this event, maybe eleven months, ten months, whatever, And I

(57:38):
don't often, didn't often see his wife and she comes
to this event and you know, again, this is like
fifteen years ago. She looked like she was pregnant again,
like the way that she was recovering from pregnancy. She
was heavy in the belly area, but not heavy everywhere else.
And I know that's normal. I know that now, and
I allowed the way you do it closes heavy in

(57:59):
the middle. Yeah. Sorry, So I said to the guy song, Hey,
congratulations on the you know on uh you know, I'm
pregnant again. Yeah, and he's licensed to me because uh
well all right man, but you know the baby's like
eleven months old. But that's so so I quickly backed

(58:24):
out of that park verse and I went, yeah, I know,
but I haven't really seen you. And I was just like, yeah,
you go. Being the father three, I was just saying, man, congratulations,
you know, kick saving. But for a second, I went
like the record scratch sound effect, like I hit the
and I was like, oh my god, she's not pregnant again.
I thought like there was a turnaround, like, you know,

(58:46):
the baby's like out? Can me get another one going?
So I saved myself there. He gave me the out.
We got some talkbacks. Oh, if you're watching on the
air listening on the iHeart radio app, feel free to
hit the microphone leave us a talk back on to
what we're saying. Let's see what even by the way,
even if you listen on another app like Spotify, if
you want to tell us something, then just open up

(59:08):
the Diheart app and leave a message. You enough have
to leave the talk back the second you hear something
that's true. Most people do it in the moment, though
I found.

Speaker 10 (59:16):
Rody during the duck Heart you missed a grammar. He
said my friend and me, oh, me, wouldn't go to
the place.

Speaker 2 (59:29):
Oh no, and the sentences my friend you.

Speaker 10 (59:32):
Were infatuated with the duckhearts, which, by the way, I'm
gonna I'm gonna, I'm gonna take a pass on that one.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
Wow, kicking off second, going strong, starting strong here on
the talkbacks. Okay, I don't remember the exact line Scary used,
and I do like the analogy, well, the explanation that
you wouldn't say me without the first I get it.
But if Scary said, oh, I went I was at
the restaurant with uh, it was just Mike and me.

(01:00:06):
That's that's grammatically correct. But I started the sentence with
my friend and me, or me and me and my friend.
That's okay. Well that's bad. No, you can't say me
and my friend because you wouldn't say me went to
the restaurant. All right, I can't the sentence with the
word me. There are no sentences that start with this
the word me. I don't care anymore, all right, Well,
I don't know, Okay, Yeah.

Speaker 10 (01:00:26):
Brooklyn boy down here in southwest Florida. Dolphin is actually
a fish. The things you guys are thinking of of
the are called porpoise or poor buy. But a dolphin
is actually a fish.

Speaker 2 (01:00:43):
Okay.

Speaker 10 (01:00:43):
So when you say would you eat dolphin? Would you
eat dolphin?

Speaker 3 (01:00:47):
Uh?

Speaker 10 (01:00:48):
Yeah, that's what mahi mahi is. Hello, lady?

Speaker 2 (01:00:52):
Is it? Okay? So hold on? You know rule number
one of correcting people, be correct, be correct. Dolphin are mammals.
Mahi mahi is not a dolphin. I'm not going to
get into it, but mahi mahi is a third cousin
of a dolphin, and it's not a dolphin. And as

(01:01:12):
far as a porpoise, hold on, I'll tell you what
the difference is. I want to give you the exact
mahi maya. Mahi mahi is a fish and dolphin is
a mammal. But wait a second, it is porpoises. Although
they are similar in appearance to dolphins, are more closely

(01:01:35):
related to narwhals and belugas. That's because of the hump
on their head. They're a different shaped head. But I
assure you they are mammals, all right. And I don't
know why you wouldn't look at look that up. And
a mammal gives birth? Is that what makes it a mammal?
It gives actually gives birth like you know, like we
do like humans. Mahi mahi are known as dolphin fish. Okay,

(01:01:57):
but they're not dolphins. They're not dolphins. That's like a
sea monkey. It's not really a monkey, right, Okay, glad
we cleared that up. Spider crabs.

Speaker 10 (01:02:06):
I've been on five this episode, three in or not
four and one? Ooh you guys got me going going,
oh yeah, brother, bring it on back now, finish it strong.

Speaker 2 (01:02:24):
Wow. Some people like to imbibe in the liquor while
they are watching and listening listening to the Brooklyn Boys.
By the way, mahi mahia called dolphin fish, guys. They
swim ahead of ships like dolphins. Are we still on
that dolphins or mammals. That's why back in the day
when people wanted to when the Dolphins would play football,
people and other teams would say, squish the fish, and

(01:02:45):
then Dolphins fans would go fish mammals, So dolphins and mammals.
I still like the way he was tying one on.

Speaker 3 (01:02:53):
Yeah, all right, it's number five now, Oh Jesus cows
have actually been found to have best friends and have
very complicated emotions.

Speaker 10 (01:03:05):
However, that's rare. File steaks, free steaks.

Speaker 2 (01:03:13):
I'm telling you these guys Brody's free Steaks. He's on time.

Speaker 10 (01:03:16):
I'm seeing a connection there, Ah, Brodie's Freeze steakup day.

Speaker 2 (01:03:22):
I could smell the liquor on this guy's breath. He apologized.
He sent me a DM and he said, I'm just apologizing.
I left you three voicemails. Oh, here comes another two
and it's Brodie's Steak dinner update.

Speaker 10 (01:03:33):
Okay, so quick, way too many. Sorry. A very humane
way to kill crustaceans, fish, anything is to freeze them, actually,
and that's scientifically what the scientists do, because they slowly

(01:03:54):
fall asleep like you are, and go as a poise
to being dripped in boiling water. It sounds crazy, but.

Speaker 2 (01:04:02):
It's but it's cut off. He got cut off. Here
here's part two of that Brody Scary Scary.

Speaker 10 (01:04:09):
I'm Brody from Twitter and Youngstown.

Speaker 4 (01:04:14):
I would probably go to Amby.

Speaker 8 (01:04:16):
Beach for a few days, go out and party, hit
up strip club like how Scary loves.

Speaker 10 (01:04:21):
That kind of stuff and Brody go out and have
a fun.

Speaker 9 (01:04:25):
Maybe go sit out by the pool, have a little
cocktail and just two out.

Speaker 2 (01:04:30):
Okay, I'm not a strip club guy, but okay, no
scary is it by the pool guy where the girls
are with the bottle service. He likes the bottle service.
I like the bottle service. Not a strip club guy.

Speaker 5 (01:04:40):
Here you go, Brody, Serious question from someone in rural America.
Do you not mow your lawn because you you don't
want to or like you don't know how? Because and
where we are, like you don't, we don't hire people
to mow our lawns. So like, is it, like, why

(01:05:02):
do you have to hire someone to mow your lawn?
Serious question, just curious.

Speaker 2 (01:05:06):
I'll answer that, go for it. I'll answer that. I'm
going to generalize a little bit, but I would say
probably if you live in a rural area, and if
you live like like, you know, really rural, you probably
have a giant property. You probably have a riding mower,
right you, Probably it was worthwhile to pay for a
riding more nice John Dee or whatever and get on
it and ride around mow the lawn. You probably have
the space for it too, right. I'm from Brooklyn where

(01:05:30):
there was three trees on the block. I didn't grow
up knowing how to mow my lawn. And then when
you get old enough to buy a home and you've
reached a point in your life where you can afford
a home, because the homes are crazy in our area,
the last thing I want to do as an adult
is mow my lawn. So everyone, I would say, either

(01:05:52):
the twenty five houses on the block, twenty six or
whatever it is, eighty percent of the people hire a
lawn service. To hire services. They seed the lawn, they
fertilize the lawn, they trim the lawn, they trim the hedges,
they do all the stuff I'm not qualified to do
now could after working two jobs for twenty four years,
the last thing I want to do is come home
and do more work. So I find my time is

(01:06:15):
more valuable. I would rather pay someone who's better at
it a nominal fee to do the work so I
don't have to also have a bad back, so I
don't want to push the lawn more around. And it's
not it's not that it's not noble. It's not that
it's not If that's what you do, great, But I
didn't grow up where my dad was like son and
learn how to mow the lawn. Yeah, I didn't. I
washed the car because he was like, go wash the car.

(01:06:36):
He's a shammy. But no, I raise Gary. I think
maybe if you make good on that.

Speaker 10 (01:06:43):
Steak dinner finally, maybe Brody will invite you to the
pool just fun.

Speaker 2 (01:06:48):
No one has nothing to do with the other, and
I hurt. I repaid him twice on the steak dinner.
Go listen to my excuses on the other everybody knows you.
Everybody knows you. Nope, paid in full. Liar, liar, Hey scary,
Maybe Brody will invite you to actually give him his

(01:07:10):
two people in a row now that are completely wrong
and don't know David Brody. I'm never getting the invite
to his backyard, not a shot. Hey, Scary, what's that there, Brody.
I'll pause that I'll invite you on a rainy day
to come to go in the pool, and you'll say, no, man,
it's raining, and then I'll claim for years that I
invited you and you turned it down the way you

(01:07:30):
try to detect the canty.

Speaker 9 (01:07:33):
Scary and Brody. Michael here from originally from Brooklyn, Slice
for Life fifty four. Hey, I think you guys should
take a vacation together and the Keys. That's when Nate
just went, you don't have to go all the way
down to Key West, but you could do Marathon Key
nice hotels, nice beaches, Jets, Keys and Brody does a
pool there for you, so you don't have to get

(01:07:53):
into the ocean and you'll have some fun.

Speaker 2 (01:07:55):
We'll love it, really, guys, Jets, thank you, thank you.
I like that idea vacation.

Speaker 11 (01:08:00):
Together, guarden and under a bush. And then my poor
Meatball was nothing but mush mush nice for life, y'all
love you?

Speaker 2 (01:08:12):
Ah nice that of the second version of the Meatball song. Yeah,
all right, how about this one over here? We're rolling,
We're cooking, We're cooking another talk back.

Speaker 12 (01:08:26):
Hey, guys, this is Lee from last week. I'm scary.
I just wanted to say I had over a week
two weeks now to think about this, and I am
only going to half say that scary is wrong. Like
the other half, I'm going to say that, like Ghania
and Sam, we're also partially wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:08:46):
So okay, have a good day, guys. This was talking
about the time when we were in my car at
the gas station and the guy came up with the
Jesus pamphlets and Gandhi and Sam tried to pick a
fight with the guy and talk back to him, and
all I want to do is keep by no clean,
take the pamphlet and say thank you very much because
they didn't want the guy to beat the shit out
of my car or me or the girls. But okay,

(01:09:06):
that's how he feels. And this is a good time
to remind people. If you're going to reference something from
a couple of weeks ago, you gotta tell us what
you're set it up, tell us what you're talking. Set
it up, set it up, shut it up full Send
Hi b boys.

Speaker 4 (01:09:19):
Christine from Saddlebrook.

Speaker 13 (01:09:21):
You have some vacation ideas for you guys. The keys,
the key, any key is fabulous.

Speaker 2 (01:09:29):
Look at this again, Nashville.

Speaker 13 (01:09:30):
I know there's no beach there, but it's still fabulous Nashville.
And then Kiawa Island in South Carolina. Really nice jet skis,
good food, et cetera, et cetera. Romantic guys, have fun
wherever you go.

Speaker 2 (01:09:45):
Thank you romantic. If we go to South Carolina, I
could knock on the door of Sam, who left me
a bad review on eBay. That's right, I have his address.
Oh but think about that. I like that. I like
the keys idea. That's two in a row.

Speaker 6 (01:09:59):
Danny donc A chiming in on the conversation with Gandhi
from the one of the last.

Speaker 2 (01:10:05):
Episodes, well done.

Speaker 6 (01:10:07):
I'm kind of agreeing with Scary on this. Although I
am a white male, I'm not Catholic or Christian, but
I think being rational with an irrational person does not
make sense, and I think him trying to diffuse the
situation was the right way to go anyways. Doesn't just
care about his car, is looking out more for everyone.

Speaker 2 (01:10:28):
Of course, that's a man with a lot of sense,
right there. I like you. How many did you just
go digging through to find that one? No, I'm playing
them in order, buddy, Danny dimes again.

Speaker 9 (01:10:36):
I just want to add.

Speaker 7 (01:10:39):
I don't get Sam and Gandhi's perspective just because I
haven't lived the life they lived, so it's kind of
tough to see what they've been through in the past.
Versus was scary myself.

Speaker 6 (01:10:54):
I've been through in the past scary, and I am.

Speaker 2 (01:11:00):
All right, don't retract on it, don't walk it back.
You're on my side. I heard a little hesitation. My
second dog is Danny Diamond, Danny Dimes. Again, just want
to say I disagree with scary Danny Dimes. I've been
giving it's a lot of thought. And well, tall Darry,
you let me down because we've come to the end

(01:11:20):
of this and uh, we're we're out. Yeah, we're out
of gas, out of time and we will have to
get him next time. Damn it. Well hard dog penis,
we don't get to talk about the erect dog. No,
this is you know what this We're gonna We're gonna prolonged.
We're gonna prolong this. We're gonna leave We're gonna leave

(01:11:42):
the penis out the same way it was out for
the dog. We're gonna leave it out for another week. Oh,
we're gonna have to let it hang for another week,
if you know what I'm saying. Yep, Look, we're not
putting the lipstick back in the tube. Sorry, guys, I
know you're disappointed that we don't get the doggy dick

(01:12:03):
conversation on the that was and by the way, we
were most excited to give you that this week. And
you would you please admit to the slices that you
tease the doggy Dick. Just say to them, I'm sorry.
I teased the doggy dick. I'm sorry I teased the
doggy dick. How long did you do that? For the
whole podcast? I teased, Wow, you tease the doggy dick

(01:12:24):
the whole the wather it was hard so long. Sorry,
Look at him. He's in London time, you know, through
the tulips with his girlfriend this weekend. Yeah. Brooklyn Boys
Boys