Ep. 358: This Ep. Gets 4.5 Stars

#358: Brody wants to give less of a wedding gift because he had to go out and buy a suit; Skeery was tricked into eating lousy food in spite of the high restaurant rating; Brody's cheesy beef burrito escapade; Skeery has the perfect plan to deal with porch pirates; Brody proposes a hypothetical dilemma in the event of a zombie apocalypse; Skeery has a message for Gen Z who apparently think "cash is cringe"

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Start up, dot up, start up, Brooklyn Boy, start up,
Brooklyn Boys, start up, dot dot up. They making noise,
dot up, start up, dot dot up, Episode three fifty
eight of the Brooklyn Boys Podcast.

Speaker 2 (00:23):
Hello David Brodie, What was that? What kind of introduction
was that? You're like, it's episode three fifty eight, Try
and give it a little every time. You kind of
like give like a dramatic pause before you said hi
to me, little rat. It was like reminded me of
a remember the old show WKRP in Cincinnati. They did

(00:44):
a nighttime show called the Quiet Storm. I think that's
what from that show. They're like, the Quiet Storm, that's
what you do. Like it's episode three fifty eight. I said,
you're trying to be sexy, trying to make our podcast
a little a little seductive. I've been told I have
a very sexy voice by what death man when I

(01:04):
drop it down low, if I get closer to the
mic scared. Let's let's be honest. You haven't been able
to drop it down low in a long time. If
I ever, If I if I get close to the
mic like this, when you dip, you break your hip
and oh yeah, give me sexy, scary ahead, all right,
this is and just speak like this. How about that?
How does that sound so sexy? Again? Anytime you're ready

(01:26):
to speak sexy? Go ahead, I'm going this is it.
This is my Oh this said, I missed it, so
I do it again. I'll pay at ladies. Ladies, turn
the volume up, turn the volume up. Okay, how I'm
just gonna talk like this? Yeah? How does that sound
sound good? Sounds like your regular voice? Scary? No, no, no,
it's me. This is me. This is me talking really low,

(01:49):
like very low. No, this isn't is not sexy to you.
Isn't it the voice that caused them to keep you
three hundred yards away from any school show? That's that's
you being sexy. This is this is scary. I am
scaredy Johns a sexy, I'm scary Jones. Oh it was
talk softer, you didn't get sexy. Yeah, talking softer for

(02:13):
me brings out the sexiness in my voice, that's all.
Oh does that work for Robin? You're like, hey, Robin,
how's it going? I don't know? Maybe if I if
I but like I'm not, I don't have sexy voice,
but I think you have to give it a little
more like, Hey, yeah you do it. Oh yeah, you
feel good tonight. You gotta like you gotta sound You

(02:35):
didn't sound sexy. You just went, hey, it's scary Jones.
You just lowered your voice. You went, hey, it's scary Jones.
Instead of Hey it's scary Jones. You went, hey, it's
scary Johnes. I'm used to yelling. I'm used to yelling
on this podcast. There's nothing sexy. Anything not yelling is
so anything not yelling is like sexy. You're in sexy zone, right.
I feel like we are the loudest of any podcast

(02:56):
out there. We have to be. I think a lot
of podcasts. If you notice some of these podcasts, these
guys are sitting on couches and they have like a
microphone propped up to the couch, and they're just like
they're leeling back there, leaning back in their hoodies and
they're just chilling, you know, They're they're just hanging. Yeah. See,

(03:17):
I feel like if we were put in that type
of atmosphere environment, I think we too would sound like that. Okay,
so but it's still doing a live broadcast possibly early
next year. Yeah, and the venue is a pretty chill venue,
and I don't know if they're gonna give us couches
or not to sit on. But I don't think that's

(03:39):
gonna affect at least me. You may be sexy scary
on the podcast live, but I'm gonna be broady from Brooklyn.
I think it depends. I think your your demeanor, your voice,
your attitude all has to do with the environment that
you're in. And you know, not for nothing, but me
sitting in my apartment is a pretty eryl Envinor environment.

(04:02):
Everything's white. We have a microphone boom here my gold ye,
by my gold mic that I was gifted for my
fiftieth birthday by the Morning Show. That that really has
to be part of this. You have to you have
a gold mic. But yeah, I've got a gold mic
the Morning Show gifted to me two years. How is
that part of the story and the environment of you
being chill, I'm paint I'm painting the picture. No that
I'm saying it's it's cold here. I'm just you know,

(04:24):
just I have a desk, you know, and it's bedroom white.
But I'm saying in my living room it's just not
it's this is not the place. Yeah, earth tones, No,
but here this is my living room, though it's slightly blue,
like light blue. But my point is it's not warming,

(04:48):
it's not cozy, it's not inviting, it's not welcoming. Correct,
So it breeds this monighal, chaotic tone that we you know,
like we're and we're screaming at each other. That's what
we do on this and I know that that's what
we're known for. But I'm just it's an observation that
I don't think we scream. I get animated. You scream

(05:09):
at me all the time. We're both very animated, both
of us. Sometimes we're more than others. But anyway, would
you at least admit your couch is not comfortable. It's
not My girlfriend refuses to sit on it. It's terrible.
You you bought a page out of a magazine. You
bought the rug and the chairs, the couch, and it
looked great in the picture. But this is why Scary

(05:29):
doesn't watch a lot of television. You know. We talk
about how Scary is like not into anything. It's like, oh,
he's not watching this is not watching that. This couch
is the problem. I have a recliner couch with big
cushiony pillows and I sit down and go, oh, and
it's scary. You you bounce off the couch when you
sit down on the couch. It's so hard and uncomfortable
plastic or leather, whatever it is. It just kind of goes.

(05:52):
It doesn't It doesn't suck you in, it doesn't welcome
you in, It spits you back out. Can we get
the microphone close up to the couch to have you
sit down hard on it to get that sound? No,
that's not even close anyway. So Birdie and I are excited.
We're we're going to see each other. How can you tell? Right,

(06:12):
we're all going to see each other. We're going We're
going to Carla Marie and Anthony's wedding. It's finally here
the days here this Friday, really and if you don't
know who they are, there are two people that were
part of the morning show. Yes, and we had Carla
Marie on not too long ago. This was the one.
This is the couple with the blackout wedding where everything
is blackout. So I had further questions for them and

(06:35):
they were answered, and that was am I not allowed
to have? You know, I have to have black accessories too,
like like for instance, if my girlfriend wants to have it,
you're gonna bring black Lloyd. No, she's gonna have a
purse and it's like a gold logo on the purse.
Is that okay? What about red bottom shoes, the red bottoms? Okay?

(06:58):
Off that bottom? Girls? Anyway? Wait a minute, Well, you're
not really gonna wear lubitons? Are No, I'm not. I'm kidding.
It's okay, but but you know, people have these questions.
Apparently I have to go. Yeah, it's apparently when it's
all black. But but it's okay to have my cuff

(07:18):
links are not black. It's okay. If my what about
my pocket square? Oh, god forbid, I put some color
in my pocket square. If I see a red door,
I want to paint it black. All right, rolling stones,
thank you? So I have go ahead ahead? No, No, So
I'm wondering. I'm just wondering. I'm wondering how far we

(07:39):
have to carry this? And the answer is pretty far.
It's it's heard you were thinking about going in blackface?
Is that true? All right? You gotta you gotta really
that's not that's not nice. So I I heard uh
that Scotti had a similar dilemma. Scotty Bee from the
Morning Show had a similar dilemma to me. Now, Scotti's

(08:02):
theory and it's it's kind of my theory as well.
We'll tell them what I'm not. You think I'm gonna
leave them in suspense and not tell them slices some
of the man of the television. Okay, So Scotty and
I are the kind of guys that don't have a
lot of fancy clothing, right we were. We wore shorts
and T shirts to work every day, and I don't
I don't enough suits. Uh So I wore I wore

(08:25):
a blue blazer to a funeral recentlya caause I didn't
have a black sport coder or even a suit. So
Scotty and I coincidentally both went out and got black
suits and black shirts. And he had to buy black
shoes because he didn't have black shoes and black tie
and I had a black tie. Added buy a black
suit and a black shirt because I didn't have anything

(08:47):
to wear for this wedding. So Scotty on the Morning
Show to call him Maurice's face because this was what
he told all you guys, but he had the balls
and tell right your face so in similar fashion, when
we talked about if you go on a destination wedding
and you have to spend hundreds of dollars on a
plane ticket and hotels and everything else, you give a

(09:08):
smaller gift because you spend one thousand dollars to get there.
His theory is and I think I kind of agree
with him. Slices, let us know what you think is
he's going to give less of a gift because he
had to spend a few hundred dollars just to go.
And I think I might agree with that because I went.
I went to Macy's because Macy's you can get a

(09:29):
good deal if they have a sale going on, if
you get a pretty good quality suit but not a
lot of money. Now, I could have gone to Men's warehouse.
We were having this conversation, by the way, where you
get nine suits for forty dollars. But I didn't go
to Men's Warehouse. I went to Macy's and I found
a suit I really liked. And I had a great
woman helping me, you know, because the guy with the
tape and the and the chalk wasn't working. But a

(09:49):
woman helped me, and she was terrific. And she found
me a shirt, a black shirt I liked, and she
took me around. She got me a suit and a vest.
I like a three piece suit. So she got me,
found me a a suit had a vest, and she's like,
this is a modern cut. You're gonna like it. She
found me a shirt with a style I like, and
it was a little trendy in the tar not so Trent. Okay,
that's important. So I'm really excited, I said, listen she was,

(10:12):
And everything's fifty percent off. Now. Now, if you've ever
been to Macy's, their stuff is a little expensive, and
then fifty percent off makes it moderately expensive. With fifty
percent off, like, it's like, oh, it's a lot of money,
but it's fifty percent off. They get you, they mark
everything up, and then they make it on sale. So
she says, listen, if you open a Macy's card, you

(10:33):
get thirty percent off. Now, normally, when you open up
a credit card at Macy's, it's ten percent off you purchase.
So I'm like, oh, thirty percent, no problem. Now, before
I get to that fiasco, I spent hundreds and hundreds
of dollars to go to this wedding and I love
calling Marie and Anthony. So my question is, am I
also entitled to maybe chintz on the gift a little bit? Yea,

(10:53):
because I spent a shitload of money on I'm never
gonna wear a black suit again lest it's to a
f and if you do, and if you do, then
you need to donate the suit to them too. You
need to package that up and give it to them,
because that's part of the present. Can't fit Anthony, can't
fit my suit. He's freaking let me say something muscular. Yeah,
And this is what was said to Scottie as well.

(11:14):
What grown ass man doesn't have a black suit? You're
you're you're sixty something. You know what? You need to
have a black suit? Talking about you and I are
both in our fifties. You talking about you at the
ladder end of the fifties and me at the beginning beginning.
You have a black You need a black suit. How

(11:35):
could you not have that in your wardrobe? How did
you get what? I wear a blacks? What would I
wear a black suit for besides get this foreign life
without owning one black suit? It's kind of like I have.
It's a it's a prerequisite to being an adult. I
have one black suit that I bought maybe fifteen years ago,
and I went to try it on, and not only

(11:56):
is it no longer in fashion, but it's too big
on me. Fair enough, but but it doesn't fit what
they lost weight and and shoes anywhere? Pants fall off me.
Your black shoes still fit. I didn't look. You have
black shoes. Of course, I have black black shoes. Have
black shoes, so and once again, I have black shoes.
You got black shoes, so you had to buy a suit.

(12:18):
I'll tell you why I have black shoes because I
bought black shoes because they go with every colored suit
you could own. Black is you get black shoes, You're good.
So I bought a pair of black shoes again, maybe
six seven years ago. I don't wear shoes, so I
wear sneakers every day. Why do any black black suit?
Slices back me up here, female slices. Does your man
have a black suit? Does he wear all the time? Slices?

(12:39):
You wear playing? Come on? You shaded? You mopstay You
don't have a You don't have a black shirt. You
had to buy a shirt too. I had to buy
a shirt. I have a black shirt. Wear wear black shirt,
white shirt, white shirt, you play pick a ball? Now, okay,
the white shirt I had too big swimming on me.
All you needed was a white or black shirt and
you got to go buy that. But I went down

(13:01):
like a shirt size and a half. In the past
year and a half, Well, congratulations, That tell us slices
how good I love. Do not do not chints on
their gift they you know, I just that's this way
this I look at it scary. In two thousand and nine,
I hired a little blonde girl named carl and Marie

(13:23):
to be an intern, and then I hired her over
the show. Hired, but I recommended her to be hired
to be our phone producer. Then I helped train her
and groom her and she said, listen, it's all her talent.
But I helped her become a co host and doing
segments on the show, and then she went off to
get her own radio show. But however, by hiring her
as an intern, she got to meet Anthony, who was

(13:45):
working for Elvis as his personal Technically, you are responsible
for them getting married, you is correct? That is correct?
And who's her her maid of honor? Her sister? Right?
But who's there in her wedding party. Oh producer Sam? Yeah?
And who else Ricky in the wedding party. I don't know.

(14:09):
She may, I don't know. I don't know anyway, Okay,
producer Sam is her best friend, right yeah? I hired Sam. Okay,
so I because of me. She has a husband soon
and a best friend. So I feel like that's enough
of a gift, don't you think? Man? You know, I'm
just I'm feeling personally that I'm feeling we can't feel.
I'm feeling a commercial break coming on. But before that,

(14:34):
I really, I really do think that you really shouldn't
take it out on this couple. For you having to
buy a suit that you will and could wear again
and again and again. You're gonna get You're gonna get
it get. You didn't get a life's use out of
this suit. Oh yeah, think about it. The next time
someone I know dies, well, it could be about you

(14:55):
might be the one buried in this suit. At the end,
I won't be buried in a suit. I'll be buried
in a some thing METS related. But that being said,
next time I'm at a funeral, I'll be thinking to myself,
how sad they're dead. But you know what, I had
a really good time at calling me and Anthony's wedding.
Thanks calin me and Anthony. If having a black tie wedding, now,
I have a suit to go bury a relative of mine.

Speaker 3 (15:16):
It's a boy's podcast.

Speaker 2 (15:21):
I for one am not taking anything out of the gift.
The gift is the gift, and if anything, I'm gonna
have to, you know, step up to the plate. Because
have you seen the place. It's very nice. It's a
really nice place. So and it's a weekend wedding. I mean,
I'm not bringing a guest. And I hear the food

(15:42):
is insane here. I mean it. Actually I was at
a wedding here at once. It's awesome. It's it's everything
you want in a wedding venue. So it checks all
the boxes. This is gonna be maximum scary Jones gift.
I mean, because if it's black tie, it's fancy bringing

(16:02):
a guest weekend wedding forgetting I mean, this is I
feel like that's not fair to me as your co host.
Oh no, you're not gonna guilt me into giving less. No, No,
I just feel like maybe you and I should have
just gone half on a gift, and then it would
be like, oh from the Brooklyn Boys. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no,

(16:23):
We're not playing that game. No way, broh, no way.
I got I got my girlfriend with me and everything.
This is this is like date night here. It is
a little weird, though, Friday versus Saturday, because you're coming
off a day of work and you, you know, our
day starts. My day forget about you. My day starts
at four am. Your day starts at four pm. Uh,

(16:48):
so you know I'm gonna have to I hate it Friday.
Friday is a little difficult for me. But I'm I'll
figure something out, I guess. But I'm looking forward to
seeing you, Brody. It's gonna be good because we don't
really get to I'm looking forward to getting all the
food that you owe me. You better put that in
your car. Oh yeah. Oh. And I was informed by
the mail room after I left today that something showed up.

(17:10):
Another thing showed us be my gift from Reggie get
that ship. Ye yes, yes, and the label I had
big scoops. I had them read the label to me,
and it said something like Scary Jones for David Brody,
not somebody else's wife. Oh, that's definitely Reggie. That was
on the on the label, I'm like, that has to
be Reggie. So yeah, I don't need Cubby's wife getting

(17:32):
my bike scoops. I'm gonna I'm gonna pick up that, uh,
that gift for you tomorrow. I'll bring that along with
everything else. I got so much stuff to hand you, man,
I mean I can't wait. By the way, if you
bump into somebody at work who's like outside smoking pot
and they're baked, I'll be like, oh, you're baked. Here's
some big scoops out of mind. So thanks Reggie. Reggie
found baked scoops for me? Is that what Wedmons? The

(17:54):
world's greatest grocery store? And uh and she picked me
up a couple of bags. I offered to pick them
up repay her. She's like, absolutely not, so thank you.
Reggie up Reggie here, this justin Oh oh oh, speaking
of Reggie, I gotta tell you what happened to Reggie here.
We have already agreed that about I don't know ninety

(18:15):
five ninety four percent something like that depends on them.
On the week of people who listen to the Brooklyn
Boys also listen to our companion podcast the Slice Time
episodes that are listen. You know, our listeners leaving talkback messages,
voicemails basically to comment about the show. And I think
the shows are hilarious, but not everybody listens. We can
tell by the numbers that about five percent don't listen

(18:38):
to both shows. And that's fine if you don't, if
you're not a big fan of Slice Time. However, this
past episode Slice Time, for episode three fifty seven, it
went off the rails. It went off the rails, out
of control. This was no excuse for this, Slices. We
apologize that you need to reclaim your time because because
we took over your show on this last episode. Yeah,

(19:01):
and I blame Scary because he said something so offensive.
Struck a nerve. Struck a nerve. Scary pooped on on
people from the heartland of our country, to the big cities,
to the mountains, people all over our great country. No
poo on that pooed them. He put pooed them. I
didn't put poo them all. I mean, we'll bring it

(19:22):
up right here, but I don't want to get into
it again because this is this is like a fifteen
minute diversion, but Okay. The crux of it was that
I think that there's something a little sus about grown
ass adults crying when they meet a Disney character at

(19:42):
Disney World because costumed character, because it's basically a sweaty
college kid in the friggin costume. It's like, so it's like,
you're hugging this kid, you know, And I'm like, what's
going on? What are you doing? Like again, not faulting
you for going on rides, for wanting to be excited

(20:05):
about the excitement of a Disney World, going to Epcot,
doing all the things you even but even you know,
I'm even gonna take it as far as not just
the costume characters Brodie, Yeah, yeah, yeah, but like the
characters dressed up like like Jasmine the Princess, you know,
or Cinderella or whoever, like these these these characters. So

(20:28):
so that's the crux of what you're an actor, you're
an actress. And I disagreed with Skeary. I stood again
a man of the people. I said, there's something of everybody.
Here's what you can do. Go and listen to it
if you haven't already, and then leave us a talk
back about the time we took over the talkbacks, but
I I felt very strongly that it's totally okay and

(20:50):
makes total sense to me that grown adults would be
moved by meeting a Disney character, And I explained why,
So go back and listen to Slice time and let
us know your thoughts, especially if you're someone doesn't normally
listen to s Lifetime. But in the middle of Lifetime
it broke out and got it got heated. Yeah, and
I was given some pretty valid parallels on people that

(21:13):
on things that we shouldn't, Yeah, will look weird. That
would look weird and sound weird if we did that
was you know what, I don't want to give it away.
Just don't give it all away. Listen to this segment.
Let us know what you think on that, all right,
because some of you, some of you don't listen to Lifetime.
You just listen to this main episode, which I'm okay with,

(21:34):
but you should listen of you are missing out on
some quality entertainment, all right. So, speaking of giving it
all away, there's a new I'm not gonna give it anyway,
there's a new show on Apple TV called Pluribus. It's made,
It's it's it's created by the same guy, Vince Gilligan
who created Better Call Saul and uh Breaking Bed. Okay,

(21:57):
so he's acclaimed TV show creator, and I need to
know what you would do scary because I feel like,
again I'm not gonna ruin the show. I'm gonna tell
you something that happens in the trailers, and it's a
I'm not gonna be specific, I promise no spoilers. The
woman in the show who was on Better Call Solid
so blonde actress. She plays an author, a very cynical,

(22:23):
I hate the world, author of books, very successful, rich woman,
and something happens to almost everyone on earth. Okay, okay,
so imagine a zombie apocalypse, right, Imagine everyone's a zombie
but you and like a handful of other people, the

(22:45):
whole planet is zombie apocalypse. Okay, so let's just call
whatever happens in the show, we'll call it a zombie apocalypse.
I don't give anything way in this show. She's not
a zombie, but everyone else is a zombie and they're
not unhappy about it. There's zombies, and she doesn't like
the fact everyone in zombies. And she meets a couple

(23:07):
of other people on the whole planet that aren't zombies,
and she says to them, dude, we gotta we gotta
do something to fix the planet. We gotta gotta change
the zombie apocalypse. Gotta find a cure for the zombie apocalypse. Okay. Now,
in this world, scary, the zombies will do anything you

(23:29):
want them to do to make you happy. Okay, Okay,
So if if you want to have sex with beautiful people,
or you want to already have food, you want to
have food, yes, you will want to have any food
made for you. Uh, you want a new car, you

(23:50):
want a plane, whatever you want, these zombies will make
sure you have it. So when she meets these other
non zombies, she's like, let's go, we gotta work together,
and they're like, oh fuck that, I'm getting everything I want. Like, yeah,
I would would, I would side with them. Why the
hell would I want to change the rors? Hold on, scary.

(24:11):
Everyone you know is a zombie. Yes, your girlfriend, everybody,
your parents, everyone is a zombie. However, anything you want,
you can walk into a department store, everything is yours
if you want it. You can go to any car
on the street. You want to want a private jet,
they bring you a get How are you not describing

(24:31):
my paradise? Okay, So what I'm saying is scary. Given
that scenario where you could maybe get everyone back from
being zombies or live like a god, pampered day and night,
which would you want? Would you help try to overde
kill the ladder? I would want? I would want to

(24:51):
continue life the way that I get everything that I
want because I'm a glutton. All right, Yeah, well what
was there more than this? Or is that you're saying?
So what you're saying is what's the hook here? You
would want to be pampered and have sex with anyone
on the planet at any time and get anything you wanted.

(25:14):
But Robin's gone, Well she's part of it, she's part
of the zombie Nope, Nope, she's part of the zombie world.

Speaker 3 (25:22):
Nope.

Speaker 2 (25:23):
Yes, right right, so she doesn't get to be part
of your world. You're still human. I'm right, I get
back sex with a zombie, So there I'm good. No, no, no,
you technically yes you could, but it wouldn't be Robin. Okay,

(25:44):
who would it be? It would be someone in It
would be a zombie Robin. It wouldn't be Robin's consciousness
so you're saying you want to should I get But
wait a second, But then I could just snap my
fingers and say, you guys would make me much more
happier if you guys acted, if you guys acted like
humans and not zombies, and then they would come back.

(26:06):
You just said more happier. That thing said, no, you
can't wish for more wishes. So what you're saying is
not an option. You either put up with the world.
Everyone's been fucked up, and not the people that used
to be but you and the four other people of
five other people can have whatever they want and live
like kings and gods. But everyone you know is gone.

(26:28):
And this is cerebral. All you have to say is scary.
You could say, you know what, I once had dinner
at a restaurant in Switzerland in two thousand and five,
the greatest meal of my life, and then they and
they make it for you. Boom. You drive a hard
bargain here. Why would I want the real world back?

(26:50):
There's so much there's so much trouble, there's problems, it's chaos, right,
So this is a world with no chaos, and you
could have whatever you want, but everyone you know is gone,
sign me up. Okay, slices, what would you do? Leave
us a talk back on all your family and friends? Back?

(27:10):
Are you want to be treated like a king and
a god forever? I'm in all right, I know it,
I know it a world. It will also be a
world without commercials. Oh what's that like? Because this isn't
that exactly? All right? Again, I didn't spoil anything other
spoilers there. But it's a very good show. I recommend

(27:32):
it highly. It comes out every week on Friday nights,
not a sponsor, and three episodes have come out. Now,
Oh what what's today's day? Oh? Today we are? What
is it? November twenty No, November eighteenth, nineteenth, nineteenth nineteenth. Here,
eight forty pm. Your president just signed the bill directing

(27:55):
the Justice Department to publicly release all of the Epstein files.
So here we go, everybody, it's coming, it's coming, it's coming.
I heard it. I heard it again. Not to get political,
but Inny, this is not a political thing. This is
just oh ship, it's going. It's coming everywhere. Boom boom
boom boom boom boom boom. Yeah, now you saw you

(28:16):
saw the email. It's all coming out. Blowing Bubba. The
blowing Bubba email was great, but I heard it was
it wasn't Bill Clinton's brother. Yes, it was funny for
an hour. Yeah. So, so imagine as a parade going by, right,
and you grab a baton from your basement. Right, you

(28:36):
have a baton in your basement, and you jump out
in front of the parade and start walking with the
baton like you're leading the parade, right, And I was like, oh,
he's leading the parade, but you're not leading the parade
because it was already a parade. That's basically what happened
in the past day two days. Someone realized everyone else
is already gonna vote for it, and they were like, yeah,
I vote for it, absolutely, I'm not. Let's go, let

(28:58):
me get my botinio. But but but you know, really,
I'm just by the time you hear this podcast, who
knows what kind of news and what kind of things
are going to be uncovered, because there's a lot of
shit that is about to be unearthed. Well, but here's
the thing, and again I'm not taking aside, hi, I'm
just telling you, like, what the facts are. Here are
the facts. The DOJ now has to make a decision

(29:23):
as to whether or not they're going to release all
of it, part of it, some of it, redact it,
meaning cause oh no, he said, go for it, go
for it. Go everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, no time
of scenes. You might yeah wink wink. Okay. So here's
the thing. Some people, I'm just gonna give you some
facts in case you're not like deep into it, because
that's a huge story. A lot of people are like, well,

(29:43):
why didn't Biden release the files if it's such a
big deal. Here's why, because it's important to what's going
on today. Gallainne Maxwell, Epstein's girlfriend, partner, whatever she was.
She went to jail in twenty twenty two and then
she appealed her case. So because it was an active case,
they couldn't release the files until the case was settled

(30:04):
in January twenty twenty five, January of this year. Then
we were legally able to release the files. They were
not releasable prior to January. Now here's why I'm bringing
this up. A couple of days ago, when there were
names kind of leaking out in those early emails, the
President said, I want my Department of Justice to investigate
former President Clinton, some other billionaires, a bank, different things. Right. Okay, Okay,

(30:29):
here's the thing. If they open up that investigation, then
they legally can't release the files because there'll be an
active investigation. What stop being so speculative. I'm just going
by because I I want to read them. I want to.
This is you know, I want to. That was the
point of why I said what I just said, because
it's let's see where this is going. This made did

(30:52):
juicee last night, the guy Larry Something. He came out
and he said, I'm stepping back. I'm stepping out of
a public life that I was just giving facts. Please
don't make life time about this the big news, breaking news.
That's all. No more importantly, I lost my fantasy football
game by point one four points. Ooh, that has to hurt.

(31:17):
That has to hurt. That's fourteen yards. That's out of
my nine players just needed to get fourteen more yards.
And yeah, I'm told it happens, man, it happens. So
on ESPN. I was, I'm watching the Monday night game
and uh, it says my chances of winning are ninety
nine percent because it was like six minutes left in

(31:39):
the game and I needed a point and a half, like, oh,
chances of winning, and then as the game is getting closer,
it's like ninety chance, yeah, percent chance. And then the
game ended.

Speaker 1 (31:48):
It was.

Speaker 2 (31:50):
I lost. So I saw I love fantasy. The most
brilliant thing this is. This is great. You're looking at him,
thank you. Yeah. So obviously porch pirates are a problem, right,
and they are. They are the worst, and they deserve
everything that that that's coming to them. Now, I've been
seeing a series of videos, right, but not what's coming

(32:11):
to me. They don't deserve what's coming to me. No,
they don't know, they don't. They take what's coming to
you and it goes to them. But I'll say that again. Now,
people telling me these are AI, I don't know if
they are not. But there's this one video that is
just magic and it is not AI. But but have
you seen the series of videos where they they run

(32:34):
up to the porch, the porch pirate, and they pick
up the package and it explodes in their face with
like with paint, it's like a paint bomb. And then okay,
so there's a lot of videos out there. You can
google them. Some of them. The really good ones are
when the package doesn't explode until they get to their car,

(32:55):
so they run into the car and then the fucking
paint goes into the car all over. But there's there's
there's a series of these where the package blows up
and it's like bright pink paint, yellow paint, blue paint
in their face, gets everywhere, gets in their car. I
think the average person, the average person can create a
paint point. Well apparently no, you they're expensive, but you can. Yeah, yeah,

(33:17):
you can actually buy these rigged gifts, right, you could
buy these rigged Now again, people are telling me, nah,
that's AI. That's not real. Regard Brody. Regardless if those
are real or not, you cannot legally buy sellowship a
package rigged to explode with paint. As such items are

(33:39):
classified as illegal booby traps or hazardous materials. We're not handled.
But it doesn't exist always an AI. That's the bigger question.
All right, But here's what you can do, all right,
all right, yep, here's what you can do. And this
this video is not AI. It's real. Somebody packaged up

(34:00):
their old broken damage TV set and they packaged it
up and they put it on their porch and they
just waited and sure enough a porch pirate came had
fucking hauled that thing away. So they turned a porch
pirate into a junk lugger and that was fucking hilarious.
Oh that's very fun. That's great. So if there's some

(34:22):
shit that you want to get rid of, brody, that's like,
ough this garbage box it up, put it on your
porch and just wait and then somebody's Facebook marketplace take
your shit out. No, but if it's something that's beyond
shit broken damage television, that would be amazing. I'm just
like that. Now, I feel like that's a very brody move. Uh,

(34:44):
it's a brody move. Now, what I'm reading online is
if you have a glitter bomb package, it says you
A lot of influences are putting up videos with glitter
bomb packages for porch pirates and whatnot. Now, I don't
know if it would stand up in court, but if
you get injured opening up a booby trapped package, you
could sue. Now, whether you win or not is another story. Yeah. Well, yeah,

(35:10):
imagine that a porch pirate. Yeah, the worst of humanity,
some of the worst, some of the worst are porch pirates. Hey,
have you ever been a victim of being a porch pirate,
slices you drop us a talk back, not of being
a no arch pirated. Have you ever been porch pirated?
Or are you a porch pirate? We want to hear
from you too. No, we don't. You'll not, You'll not,

(35:33):
you will not remain anonymous. We will not change your voice. Yeah,
So what else is news? Anything? Good? Well? I started
telling you about the suit I bought. So the woman
at Macy's tells me, oh, if you open up a
Macon's credit card, you have thirty percent off. So I said, well, uh,
you know, every ten years or so I opened up

(35:54):
a Macy's credit card for the discount and then I
don't use it and it gets closed. He said, oh no, no,
how long has it been. I said, I don't know
about may be ten years I had it. Oh, oh,
you should be fine. I said, all right. I said,
what happens if I already have an account? There's no, No,
you're fine. So she looks at up. She says, you
don't have an account. You're good. It's okay, great, Now
my credit scores is My credit scores are great. I

(36:14):
have money in the bank. It's all good. We get
money in the bank. You have money in the that's
by buy you a drink. You're gonna buy you a
try Yeah, all right, yo, thirty percent off is like,
you know, it's it's a couple of hundred bucks almost
considering how much I'm spending on his suit and his
shirt and the vest and everything. So I run the

(36:35):
credit card and she goes, oh, it was declined. I said, what, Yeah,
you didn't get approved. I said, how could I not
get approved? Are talking about now? I said, uh, now
before you slices are like, well, you're unemployed. I I
put down a household income that was approvable, right, and

(36:56):
I again, my credit's good, I have money in the bank.
I have. I just realized something that if you're unemployed
and you admit that that they might they might know.
I'm just saying that they could not approval. Here's the thing,
it's possible for them to not approve it. Right. I
put down the household income and I included whatever little

(37:17):
money we make on the Brooklyn Boys, and it came
to a decent number. Okay, the number, solid number? It
all right? So she's just so sorry. Just we've been
having a problem lately where it's been declining people I
don't know. I don't know. So I take out my
credit card ma app and I show her I have
a very high credit score, and she goes, oh my,

(37:38):
I'm so sorry. I don't know what this could be.
So not only did I not get the discount or
thirty percent off, but now I have a credit hit
on my account. Yeah, because they made it hard inquiry,
which is a hard inquiry that that that you'll take
a little bit of a hit for that. Are they
going to rectify the situation? Well, they told me I'll
receive a letter in the mail in five to ten
business days with that possibly might explain, and then I

(38:00):
can appeal it and come back with the letter and
and uh. So I called the credit card company. I
called the division that handles it, and I got, you know,
not in America. When I answered yes, oh uh, he
said his name was Cliff. Okay, this is Cliff. Okay,

(38:20):
you're not Cliff right. Then he goes, I gotta transfer
you to the applications department. So then I so, then
I got I got let me check my notes here, Janet.
I got Janet, and Janet says to me, oh, yeah,
we can't help you, I said, But Cliff told me
you guys can help me. Yeah, you'll get a letter
in the mail I got. I know, but I want

(38:41):
to fix this because I want my discount. Uh, there's
nobody here that can tell you why you would you
would turn down? Wow, you'll get a letter. Will the
letter tell me? Probably not. So I'm gonna get a
letter confirming I was turned down. Wud already know it's
not gonna tell me why. So I bought a suit.
At that point, Gary, I couldn't put anything back. No, no,

(39:01):
you had to go forward with it. I like, oh,
I didn't get the I didn't get the thing. Well,
then put the shirt back and I'll go some and
get a cheap shirt. Like I felt awkward. So I'm like,
you know what, I'll just buy it and then if
if it's a problem, then I'll buy a cheap shirt
somewhere else. And we turned this one. But I wasn't
gonna like not take it there and be like, oh,
well I'm not getting my discount. Take the shirt back,

(39:22):
you know, like what like when you go to buy
groceries and like it's too it's more money than you have,
and like, uh, put the chicken back, and yeah, can
the cans of corn? And you say, which terrible? What
do you have to do that? So yeah, I got
denied and I'm telling you, oh, yeah, I should have
mentioned we've had that problem. So then the manager, she goes,
let me call my manager see if they can fix it.

(39:42):
So she calls the manager and he says, would you
like to run it again? We can give it another shot.
And I said, if I run it again when I
get another credit hit, yes, yeah, I don't do that.
Now I'm not getting a second credit hit. She's just, oh, yeah,
we've been having a problem. I said, oh okay, well
what are you gonna do? Can you take the can
you take the hit off my credit report? Now we
can't do that. There's no way to do that. So

(40:03):
I'm fucked, double fucked. So I'm gonna wear that suit
to go play pickleball to get my money's worth, is
what I'm saying. Okay, oh my god, Oh update you
wanted to know about? Well maybe you didn't. I didn't,
but I you know, I had my I had my
uh all the Brooklyn boys and then we went up

(40:26):
we went up to Yeah, we went camping. We didn't
go camping. We went up to Hudson Vallance. We were
not pitching tents. Bro We stayed at my buddy's house.
Did you blow Bubba in the woods? I was up there.
We went to uh well, first of all, we went
to Cornwall on Hudson and uh you a cornwalling? And

(40:48):
we went to Now we went to our favorite place
we did it, did it three years in a row now,
the Drowned Lands Brewery in Warwick, New York. We had
an awesome time drinking all afternoon, hanging out there. It's
artisanal pizza there that they you know, beautiful old school
pizza oven. Wait a minute. Artisanal pizza means it's handmade
like all pizza. Yeah, hand made, well, artisical, but the

(41:11):
rustic kind, you know you know what I mean, right,
not the mass produced pizza had had, wouldn't it. It
wasn't Papa John's dick. It was an actual, real like
handmade calling it artisanal, no, it was. It was good.
We had a good time there all afternoon, and then
we went up. We went up to Beacon, New York,
which is really Beacon's beautiful Beacon. Beacon is you can

(41:36):
go antiquing Antiakon and Beacon you can. We we didn't
go antiquing, but but we we went been to the
I've been to the Beacon theater. Now can you see
beacon from a long distance? Is that a joke? Yeah,
like if you're beacon. Yeah, that's where I thought you
were going with that. There's no lake. You didn't go
out on the lake. I was thinking maybe you go

(41:57):
out a lake and no, no, no, we went to
a restaurant, I mean a couple of bars. Uh yeah,
in the sleeping situation, it was a little awkward, but uh,
you know, something was on the bottom. I nope, I
was a room in the room by myself, in the
bunk bed bottom. That was by myself, all right, So
there was no one ever tell you woke up? Were
you still by yourself? I was still by myself? Of course.

(42:19):
One thing I noticed, though, when we go out of town,
you would come to me. You know me, and you
know me and and Google ratings, right, oh, absolutely, I live.
I live by my and died by my Google ratings.
You used to be as a gad guy, you lived
and died by the gad Well, well I learned that
and you guys, could this is google able that Yelp

(42:45):
is bought and paid for and is never an honest review?
You can you can actually pay. I can't say never
because I've left honest reviews all right, No, no, no, no, no,
the reviews you are If you don't, if you're a business,
a small business, and you're not paying into Yelp, you're screwed.
But if you pay into Yelp, you can actually pay

(43:06):
to have bad reviews removed. And are you saying it's
like the mafia? Yeah, hey a top So you may
see some four point seven eight to nine on Yelp knowing,
but the bad reviews have been removed, probably by the
business because they paid for it. You can't do that

(43:26):
with Google ratings. So they're right away, right up from
the jump, they're a lot more honest. Well what I say,
I got what is the restaurant owner pay one hundred
people he knows to give great park There are some
places that may do that that say, hey, leave us
a great review, you get twenty percent off your bill,
But for the most part, damn party does that. They're

(43:49):
pretty they're okay. I would say that they're fairly accurate.
So when I see with Scary Jones when I'm talking
about myself on the third person, Scary Jones sees a
four point five or fourth quarter is scary. You're pretty
much the third person. Thanks. When I see a four
point five and above, I get excited because I know

(44:11):
that that's a special place. It's hard to sustain a
thousand reviews. Let's say, if a thousand reviews and have
a four point five and up in New York City
or the area around here, you're always gonna be It's
always gonna be a home run. You're never gonna be disappointed. However,
terrible at maths. You're terrible at math scary because the
more reviews you have at a four point five means

(44:32):
the more reviews bad reviews. You needed to bring that
from a five to a four point five. No no,
no, no yet, no, no no, you're not understanding not understanding this. No, no,
no bad no. Hold on the four point five. Nope, okay,
no one gives it, gives these restaurants five five five,

(44:53):
I mean the stars. Here's what happens. You gotta play.
How do I even explain this? Restaurants? Yes, I know,
but there's gonna be there's gonna be there's gonna be
like the the law of averages and the or the
there'll be points taken away because people give it one

(45:14):
star for let's say, bad service here and there or
whatever that means. They have a lot of one stars
to bring it from five to yes. No, but you
have to no, no, no, no, no. A lot a lot
of people downvote these fucking places. They're a lot more
critical and a lot more harsh on Google ratings. So
so if you have a four point five and above

(45:37):
in in New York and these places with a thousand
thousand ratings, it's hard to sustain that. But those those
are considered amazing restaurants, Those are excellent four point five point,
four point six, four point seven. It's hard, it's hard
to keep up. No one's got a fucking five. Oh,
No one who got a five? Oh? There's always there's

(45:59):
always an asshole like you out there, and and there's
a lot of you. There's a lot of Caro. I
don't leave. I don't leave a lot of car lot
of Karen I leave good reviews. Here's what I'm gonna say.
You shop on eBay Okay, I have one hundred percent
positive ratings. That's different. No, no shout back back. Sometimes
you'll see a company with a ninety nine point five

(46:20):
percent positive rating. Now you think that's pretty good, don't you.
Ninety nine point five percent, that's great. They've sold twenty
five thousand things. Oh my god. Okay, But then you
look and you see this eighteen hundred negative reviews. That
means eighteen times they fucked up. That means out of
one hundred, uh a half out of one hundred is bad.

(46:45):
I get that. I get that. That means one out
of two hundred is bad. I get that. That's pretty
good odds, except this eighteen hundred bad reviews. I'm not
buying from them. You should have no bad reviews. Yeah,
but yeah, but if you do business, if you do
business on such a large scale like that, you're bound
to have cola. Not if you read them and they

(47:06):
get very specific o activity. My point is, no, here's
here's what you should do. Go to any restaurant review,
any business review. Don't read the positive reviews. You read
the negative reviews because if they say and then you
see if they're valid or not. If somebody writes, I
went and there's a roach in my pasta, and then
someone else writes there was a roach in my pasta.

(47:27):
Then guess what a thousand good reviews. I don't care
if two people saw roaches in the pasta. I'm out
saying yourself the time anyone. Chances are those places are
going to have other things wrong with them as well,
and they will get down voted a lot quicker, you
know it is. I don't want to argue with you
on this Google ratings things for resting, specifically Google Google

(47:51):
ratings for restaurants. When you see all right, forget about
what Brody just said for a second. Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure,
When you see a four point five and above four
point six, four point seven, you're in a fucking insanely
awesome restaurant and you will never go wrong, despite what
Brody's telling you. And can you go to a restaurant
with a four point eight that's a great restaurant. Hold on,

(48:16):
My larger point of this entire conversation is four point
five is it's trash? It's no, it's not. Four point
five is awesome. Four point five is really good. It's
hard to sustain a four point five with a thousand rating.
Let me ask you a question. But hold on, you
were in a world where everyone was a zombie and
you were the only one left alive, would you want
them to bring you food from a four point five

(48:37):
or a four point eight. You're not even letting me
get to finish. Finish, go ahead, I'm sorry. Otherwise Slices
will tell me that interrupted. Sorry, go ahead. What I'm
saying is if four point five it just humor me
for a second, Brody. If four point five and above
is an amazing, outstanding restaurant, which according to say, which

(48:59):
fuck Brody it is, trust me, Slices, I'm the foodie
he's not. Or I'm the man of the people. For
whatever reason. When you go to a smaller town like
a beacon or your neighborhood whatever, mm hmm, a four
point five, who are like a three point five? It

(49:21):
We went to a place which I was so disappointed.
I'm not gonna give the name out. I don't want
to ruin their small business. But the food sucked. The
pork wasn't porking, the steak wasn't staking, it was gross,
and the food was bland. The tuna tartars, the tuna
crispy rice had was bland had no taste to it,

(49:44):
no flavor. Take me to flavor town and we all
look at each other. I'm like, this is a four
point five that's supposed to be awesome. This is not
a four point five, guys, I'm sorry. So I think
you hate when you're when you're you're tuna tartar is
not as good as you'd like. Don't hate, that's like,
no hold on even But we had we spent a
lot of apps. We sput a lot of apps. But

(50:06):
I feel like they don't have an advanced palette, so
they don't know what good food is. Oh there he is.
That was the big wind up. You went to small
town America. Yeah, I went to a small town and
you want you or a tartar? Was the baked Alaska

(50:28):
taking too long? We all listen. Some people ordered burger
and fries. They couldn't even do the fries right, they
were The fries were fucking soggy as hell, as we
say in Italian shanghat. It was gross, bro, it was disgusting.
This would not be you would have you would have
sent three things back. And I was appalled, and we

(50:49):
were looking at each other, and one buddy was like,
it has a four point five, it should be awesome,
and I'm like, you're right, it should be. But I
came to the conclusion that when you go to smaller
it takes less to please them and it takes less
for them to give it high marks. Okay, I would
like to say two things. If you would listen to
David Brodie's advice, you would have said four point five,

(51:11):
I'm not eating there. Second, of all slices, I would
like to apologize to the large amount of slices that
live in small town America who enjoy our podcast, who
have a wonderful palette, a taste palette, and appreciate good food,
who go to places and get whatever they want, whether
it's steak or this is not now, this is don't

(51:33):
try and and couch me as that guy. Okay, this
is not me throwing shade at because your couch is
hard and you're not. No who listen in smaller towns.
I'm just saying I heard what you said. I heard overall, Mike,
go on overall they It goes back to the pizza conversation.

(51:56):
We have the best and most available pizza in the
fuck in the universe. So you in your in Brody
same similar in Verty's similar and analogy. He'll say, then,
how can it How can new Haven pizza and people
there judge what good pizza is. They're in New Haven.

(52:20):
There's only a few great standout places, So how can
new Haven be the pizza mecca of the world? To that,
because people people in Connecticut grew up liking that style
of pizza, and I get that. But New York has
all styles of pizza, and we've already beat that to death.
What you did was you said, anyone from a small
town has no taste palette. That's what you said. I

(52:42):
did not say that. I said I did rewind the tape.
If we had tape, I red. There's no such thing
as tape. I know no. But and again, this is
not a bougie thing. This is an observation. There's no
other way. What you had? What did you have that
you like? The state tartar? Would no my pork, the caviar,

(53:02):
the pork chop caviar. It was a pork chop, bro
it was. And the asparagus sucked, and so and so
was a golden flake disparagram. We had Brussels sprouts, we
had you know what was good, the onion rings. The
onion rings were great, so the onion rings, the onion rings.
But I'm just trying to search for an answer really

(53:25):
as to why a four point five, which which by
the way, is a really great fucking score. Trust me, Okay,
I'll tell you. In the world, why is a four
point five? You they're different than a four point five
in a bigger city, okay. Number one, the people there
may appreciate the tuna tartar there, or maybe they get

(53:48):
but maybe they go for onion rings and they give
it a high score. Maybe they go for the things
that they liked, that they do well. And you what
you did, scary. You went to a diner, all right,
and ordered chicken palm and were disappointed that it wasn't great.
You went to a diner and ordered something like a
fancy lobster dish, and you're like, I can't believe that

(54:10):
the diner didn't do my los to the right way.
You shouldn't go to a small town then at a
restaurant you never been to. It isn't known for that
tun of ta tar in order toun to tatar. Is
it a seafood place? No? Because you have just proved
you are a re Tar Tar and I didn't say
the words. So it's okay.

Speaker 3 (54:27):
The Brooklyn Boys Podcast We will be right back.

Speaker 2 (54:33):
Scary. There's a movie out this weekend. I'm so excited
for it's it's a movie that you wouldn't see because
you don't go to the movies. But if you like
John Wick gun Fo type movies, gun Foo. Yeah. I
told you about a movie about a year ago called
I think it was The Train or Train Ride or

(54:54):
something like that, and it was an Indian film where
the guy gets on the train and basically that people
are trying to kill him, so he kills one hundreds
of people. It's a great movie. Oh it's called Kill.
It's called Kill anyway if you like that kind of movie,
NonStop action, no plot necessary, not a lot of dialogue,
just the clever ways to kill people. A movie came

(55:17):
out about a year and a half ago called Se
Sue sis U. Takes place in the forties or in
the thirties, so the Nazis exists at that point, and
it's a guy I think he's from Finland and he's
on the Finland German border, so he's near the border
of Germany. Okay, I think it's Finland. If anyway they

(55:42):
they I'm not gonna tell you too much about that
movie other than people kill his family, and like any
good action film where somebody kills your family, you want
to make them pay. And he goes go see this
movie c Sue Si Su and he doesn't speak. The
man doesn't speak. He doesn't talk the whole movie. He
may have like two words. He's just a big burly

(56:04):
man with a beard, and he kills people in unique, hilarious,
kick ass ways. And it's a lot of Nazis. You're like, yeah,
kill those Nazis. Okay, it was fantastic. This weekend's scary.
The sequel is out and it's called Cisu Road to Revenge,

(56:25):
and just like the last one, terrific reviews ninety eight
percent on Rotten Tomatoes four and a half out of
five stars, which, by the way, four and a half
out of five stars is better than a restaurant that
gets four and a half out of Okay, rody whatever, because
movies don't typically get one star, so four and a
half means it's probably mostly fours and fives, whereas restaurants

(56:46):
get a lot of ones. And two's that bring it down.
It's a different rating system before you're like four and
a half. I'm recommending going to see Seasu. Now that
being said, I had a little problem at Taco Bell
because I think I told you this. They brought back
the chili cheese burrito. Did I tell you this story? No,
for a limited time only they did. Oh oh okay,

(57:06):
yeah you did. They brought back nineties week, nineties month,
and it was supposed to end November first, nineties month
is over. Well. On my Facebook feed, Taco Bell, your
official Facebook account and Instagram advertised, we heard you. We're
keeping the chili chili cheese burrito on the menu. Great,

(57:26):
You're not alone. I'm so excited and I just can't
hide it. So I go to a place and order.
I told you this last week, and it's no longer
in the app. Gone. So they told me they could
add it to my order. Okay, I remember this, yes,
this whole yep. I don't know how to do that, Okay,
So I emailed a comment to corporate. In the app,

(57:47):
it says email us your comments, give us feedback, and
I said, hey, you know, I'm a big fan of
the chili cheese burrito, and I gave them. It says
what location you have to put in what store you
went to? And I said, listen, I live in New
Jersey at this store. It's not in the app you're
selling it. It's not in the app. So I get
a phone call a couple of days ago from Mike.

(58:07):
Mike is the manager of the Taco Bell that I
go to. I said, hey, Mike, what's going on. He goes, hey,
I got you your email and it gets flagged as
a criticism of our store, even though it was about
the app. I said, I didn't criticize your store. You
guys are great. All I said was he goes, yeah,
But because you listed our store at the beginning when

(58:28):
it asked you, corporate doesn't even see it. It goes
right to the local store. So, guys, if you go
to Taco Bell and you want to complain to corporate
about something you can't, it goes right to the local store.
So it's got to be an idea for this. There's
got to be a way to find someone's email address
in the corporate chain. I guess there is. Go on
LinkedIn or call the eight hundred number. But the point
is the app fucked me. So then Mike is like, hey, man,

(58:52):
I have to make sure you're happy so I can
report to my regional so we don't get a strike
against us. I said, Mike, I love you guys. I'm
there all the time, nothing but Rave reviews, except you
know a couple of years ago when you used to
make me pull over by the garbage because you didn't
want me to sit and get timed. But I didn't
bring that up. They don't do that anymore, he says. Listen,
here's what I'm gonna do. I feel terrible, he said.

(59:12):
If you can't order it through the app. My name's Mike.
You come in. I'm there almost every day, and I'm
going to give you. I'm going to give you some
free chili cheese burritos as my way of saying it's nice.
I said, Oh, that's terrific. That's terrific, he said. But listen,
I gotta be honest with you. They're taking it away.
In New Jersey. It's a regional item, and in some

(59:34):
parts of the country it's staying like Arizona, New Mexico.
But here in New Jersey it's going off the menu
and individual franchise owners can decide if they want to
order the seasoning, but we are not. I have forty
pounds of seasoning at the store and our boss decided
we're not going to sell it anymore. So if you want,
I'll give you a big bag in seasoning for free.

(59:55):
I can't do anything with it, I said, what am
I going to do with a pound of seasoning? He goes,
could make tacos, You could do whatever you want, and
you can read you'll have that. I was about to say,
you'll have that flavor on just about anything that you want.
So I said great. So he says, come by, So
I said, I, I'll come by in a couple of days.
So today is what Wednesday. I went by Monday a full.
I was like, I'll get some lunch. I'm gonna go

(01:00:17):
buy and I'll get a couple of free chili cheese
burritos because, as he told me, it's expiring. They're taking
it off the menu. I had five days. That was Monday,
which means Friday or Saturday roughly it's gone. So I'm like,
you know what, I'm gonna get a couple. So I go,
and I go, and I it's in the app scary
it's back in the app. I couldn't be more excited.
I'm like, holy shit, it's back in the app. I

(01:00:38):
guess somebody heard me. So I order five of them.
I'm like, fuck it, I'm gonna order enough. It's gonna
get me through the week because they'll give me gone.
I go to the drive through. The AI says, is
this your order to look? Correct? Is you want to look?
I guess it does. I'm so excited, and I pull around.
I figure, you know what, I'm gonna buy five and
if Mike's there, he'll give me a couple of extra
because he sees I'm I'm a legit fan of the

(01:00:58):
chili cheese brito. I get to the window. I get
to the window and there's the woman with the headset
and one of the cooks, the tall guy, And I said, Hi, yeah, Hi,
how you doing? You ordered the five chili cheese Britos? Yes?
I did. Is Mike here? No, Mike's not here. Oh okay,
what's up? Can you pull around and come in the store. Why, well,

(01:01:21):
there's a line of cars behind you. No, I get that,
But why do you want to come in the store?
She says, we have to heat up the chili for
the chili cheese burrito, and we have to mix it,
and it's gonna be it's gonna be a little while.
And I said, what do you mean it's on the menu.
What do you mean. Yeah, we didn't make any of
this morning, and we have to mix it and put
the seasoning on it and put the So she says,

(01:01:42):
have you come in, it'll be like ten minutes tops.
So I said, you know what, I'm good, just cancel
my order. Sheas, you have to cancel the order in
the app. I said, I no problem. Meanwhile, it's her fault.
So I pull over and I pull over by the
garbage pail and I go to cancel the order. I
can't cancel the order. Scary, Why because not only the restaurant. No,
the restaurant has already started making your order. Oh you

(01:02:04):
can't cancel it. Oh shit. So I had to go
in now because I just rang up like fifteen dollars
worth of chili cheese burritos. So I had to go
in and I had to get my money back, so
I didn't get any chili cheese burritos. I said, when's
Mike going to be here? We don't have Mike's schedule.
I don't even know if Mike works there. I need
a chili brit scary before they take them off the Metica. Well,

(01:02:26):
why don't you, Why don't you go to a restaurant
that serves him in a four point seven rather than
the three point eight taco bell that you decided to
go to. Okay, scary, All the taco bells are three
point seven exactly, They really are, every single one of them. Yeah,
but I love them. That's it. Yeah, just a public service.

(01:02:46):
I don't know. This has been on my mind lately
at service announcement. No, I just this is this is again,
this is the uh, the the the crumbling of of
of humanity. Okay, there's ay who doesn't care if humanity does.
Another viral trend that I'm seeing where people are filming

(01:03:07):
themselves in traffic passing a car wreck and then the
car is like upside down or wrapped around the tree,
and the people are going through the worst their likes life,
and and you hear them say you can't part there,
and then the people get fucking angry, and they're already

(01:03:27):
in a time of despair and pissed off. They're trying
to be funny. They're they're rage baiting. They're rage baiting
the people that are already having a shitty fucking day. No,
they're trying to get a fun video where it's like,
Aha'm being funny. You can well it's a viral trend
and it's got a fucking stop. You don't, you don't.
You don't do that to people in their worst moment,

(01:03:49):
in their worst hour, when they're when they're agonizing, or
god forbid, somebody's trapped in a vehicle or something, or
they're they're hurt and they're they're all they get people
when they're all discombobulated, when they're all like and they go,
you can't park there, you know, it's illegal to park there.

(01:04:10):
And then the people, some of them come running at
trying to you know, running at the cars, and then
they speed away. But that's fucked up other than I
looked in the comments and some people are like, oh no,
that was a voiceover. They just voiced that over. They
just found that d No. No, A lot of them
are actually real, A lot of them are And that's

(01:04:31):
pretty shitty. I don't know, that's all. I just wanted
to say that there's no punchline here, there's no funny moment,
there's no haha, that's just rude. Does and then did
the package explode and pink on all over the people
that were exactly just be better at people. You didn't
see these their rage baiting videos. But yeah, they they
want to make a funny viral video. They think they're
going to get clicks and likes and follows, and they're

(01:04:56):
just at other people's expenses. While people are are in
an accident on the side of the road, they have
to fucking yell that out the window. Yeah, that's terrible,
terrible people. All right, on that note, that down note,
We'll be right back, all right.

Speaker 3 (01:05:10):
With Scary and Brodie.

Speaker 2 (01:05:12):
All right, Scary, would you like to hear a terrible
voiceover commercial or some Facebook riddles with some really bad answers?
I want to hear and I actually want to hear
the audio. Okay, let me plug this in if you can.
I I edited out the company names. You might hear
like a little glitch in the middle. But this is
supposed to be a husband and wife or a brother

(01:05:33):
and sister or whatever talking about their problems and making
it sound natural. Now she's average at best, but he's terrible.
You've heard these commercials, Oh, Mike, the sink's broken again,
and they're like, we really should have brought insurance. Yeah,
we should have. So listen to this commercial and tell
me how this guy, what would you hire this company

(01:05:54):
that hired these people as their voice over people. Listen
to the guy.

Speaker 3 (01:05:59):
You're telling me credit cards are maxed out?

Speaker 2 (01:06:02):
Kay. So he should have said, you're telling me right.
Our bills are piling up, and he should have said,
you're telling me, But instead he says, you're telling me.

Speaker 3 (01:06:13):
Yeah, up, you're telling me credit cards are maxed out,
red as due, and the car payments right around the corner.
He needs some extra cash.

Speaker 4 (01:06:22):
Want my friend from work out and back the then
she needed the next day?

Speaker 3 (01:06:26):
Our credit is not great? Are you sure that would
work for us?

Speaker 2 (01:06:29):
Our credit is Oh my god, that is so bad.
That's bad acting. Feel it gets worse. Here we go
one of the.

Speaker 4 (01:06:35):
Largest personal loan networks.

Speaker 3 (01:06:38):
Sounds like it's going to be a hassle.

Speaker 2 (01:06:41):
Sounds like hassle crazy.

Speaker 4 (01:06:46):
She did it right from her phone during our lunch break.

Speaker 2 (01:06:49):
Are you telling me you couldn't get anyone else to
do this commercial? And the writing is pissed poor. Also,
you're telling me, yeah, she's telling you exact exactly. No, no,
go back, go back to that other line. What did
she say?

Speaker 3 (01:07:07):
Up, you're telling me credit cards are maxed out?

Speaker 2 (01:07:10):
Did you notice they edited it so there's no space.
There's no space. You're telling me credit you're telling me
credit cards all lot of play.

Speaker 3 (01:07:17):
You're telling me credit cards are matched out. Renisdu and
the car payments right around the corner. He needs some
extra cash.

Speaker 4 (01:07:24):
Want my friend from workday and that the many she
needed the next day.

Speaker 3 (01:07:28):
Our credit is not great. Are you sure that would
work for us?

Speaker 4 (01:07:31):
Tom is one of the largest personal loan network.

Speaker 3 (01:07:34):
Sounds like it's going to be a hassle.

Speaker 4 (01:07:36):
My friend said it was super easy. She did it
right from her phone during her lunch break.

Speaker 2 (01:07:40):
She didn't right, I found it. Yeah, you're telling me,
is there more? No, that's it. I I edited up.
Like the voice the voiceover guy at the end is like,
you should use this company. He's terrible also, but he
kept saying the name of the company. I don't want
to edit it. I can't believe, like like she's so
surprised by her own statement. She did it right from
her phone. I mean, I don't know how else would

(01:08:01):
you fucking do it? Like this is like twive. It's amazing.
You pick up a phone and you and you're able
to complete a task right from the desk. Her bills
paid to her phone, right from her desk. Mind you.
I mean, she wasn't anywhere else. She was at her desk,
her own She was in her hometown where the restaurants

(01:08:24):
get a four point five. She didn't have to go
to a big city on her phone. Scaring shit, they're
so amazed. You're telling me, you're telling me from now
on scary when you say something shocking, I'm gonna go.
You're telling me, you're telling me. Hey, did we talk
about how gen Z thinks cash is cringe? Oh, it's

(01:08:44):
it's chopped. It's chopped. Yeah, over thirty chopped. They said.
There's an article out that over thirty percent of gen
Z feels that cash is cringe and they don't want
to have anything to do with it. They don't. They're there.
Some of them are awkward, they're weirded out by by
the side of cash. Their anxieties go up, and I

(01:09:06):
don't know whether it's it's because they don't know where
it's been. That's okay, So so that that was my
other suspicion is that they start sweating because they don't
know how to remember what I get. A few times
on this podcast, we've had examples of people like miscounting
the change. They can't make change of one hundred, change

(01:09:28):
of a twenty, change of fifty. I think that makes
them sweat because they don't they're not used to it,
and they're afraid they're going to fuck it up. But
there's that, But a lot of them, some of them say, oh, yeah, well,
I don't know where this dollar that you know, this
money has been. Has this been in a stripper's ass crack,
you know where you know what, filthy, unsavory places, and

(01:09:51):
now I'm handling this money. But yeah, they if you
google that cash is cringe gen z. We're you know,
and you know it's cringe up until you're a server
or a waiter or a bartender and you get tipped
in cash. Because if you get tipped in cash, you

(01:10:13):
don't have to pay the processing fee on the credit card,
which a lot of businesses and employers passed that fucking
fee on to the employee. So if you know, and
it seems to me that gen Z are the ones
that are in those server roles and those bartender roles,

(01:10:33):
so they should get over it real quick and start
appreciating cash and and how and how can gen z
work as strippers If I put a dollar bill in
your g string and you're like, oh, no, cash is cringe, Okay,
give me a dollar bill back. I did get a
really dirty look at the strip club. No bill bill

(01:10:55):
was one hundred bucks. We gave we gave were paid
by credit card, but we put the twenty in cash.
We gave it to her and she was like kind
of weirded out by it. I'm like, oh my god,
that's free, right to go. This is one of those
this is one of those moments. First of all that
I'm thinking like, oh my god, this is one of

(01:11:15):
those cashes cringe people. She must be one of the
thirty percent. But when she took the money, I'm thinking like,
had we put the fucking money at the twenty dollars
on the credit card, her employer would have charged her
the processing fee and she would have gotten less than
twenty dollars. She would have gotten like seventeen whatever, whatever,
it is. I don't think they charge you for a process.

(01:11:37):
They do the server, employee, employers. I just said it earlier.
You'd have missed when I said, oh no, no, to
go back and add a tip. I don't think this
is you play with pay with the names card. There's
a processing fee right the business. The businesses lose money,
so what are they gonna do. They're gonna and you
put twenty dollars tip on there that comes out of

(01:11:59):
the server pocket. They think you're wrong. It's not tax
processing fee, the processing fee for the purchase. But I
don't think the tip is. Hold on, there's no tax
on tips anymore. That's been abolished. It's not the tax.
It's not tax, dude, hold on, it's the credit card
processing fee, folks. That's what I'm looking up. I didn't

(01:12:20):
say anything about the hold on, dude, I already know
it is. What do you what are you trying to
fact check me, you dick, because because I like facts,
you are correct. Of course I'm correct. I would just
spew terrible. Of course it's terrible, and employers aren't gonna
take the hit. They passed that on to the employee
that got the tip. So hey, assholes who hate cash.

(01:12:44):
You're losing money if it goes on the credit card.
Take the fucking cash and deal with it. Hey, I'm
gonna say this. I've said it before, and if they're
a sponsor in this podcast, I apologize. But fuck credit cards.
They charge you, they charge Look, first of all, I
don't appreciate businesses charging me the fee for the credit card.

(01:13:07):
You want to be in business and use credit cards
where I can then pay you for my food more easily.
That's the processing for you should pay. However, to add
a tip to a server, credit card companies to absolutely
not be charging three percent for what amounts to no
effort on their part other than allowing you to add money.

(01:13:28):
That's bullshit. Of course it's bullshit. B And then and
then when that server can't afford to pay a credit
card bill or his credit card bill, what do they do?
They charge them nineteen to twenty nine percent Like the
fucking mob. You can get your knees broken for a
lower interest rate than credit card companies charge you, and

(01:13:48):
then a lower extortion a lower extortion rate. Oh, what's
in your wallet? I don't know, celebrity, you know it's
not in my wallet. A billion fucking dollars like you have.
So don't be doing credit card commercials where you can
pay yours and I can and now I'm paying twenty
nine percent interest and I'll never get off from one
of those credit card bills. Never. So I don't care
if you're at a restaurant, Oh, I with my cash back.

(01:14:09):
What's his name, the comic, the little short guy, Kevin Hart,
Kevin Hart. Hey, Kevin Hart. I'm glad you're a multi
millionaire and you're sitting at a cafe and you go
into Lakers games whatever, you're getting your cash backing. You're
cash backing. That's great, Kevin Hart. I'm cash backing. Who's
cash backing with me? You know what? I'm giving my
cash back to the credit card company because it charges

(01:14:30):
me twenty five percent interest. I'm sorry, twenty four point
nine nine percent interest. The Smoking Mirror show, bro. It's
like because they're they're they're they're like saying, oh, look
at the shiny little toy over here, which is cash
back and points and miles and earning. Yeah, you get
three percent. You have to pay that balance from month
to month, and you're you're fucking you're underwater. And you'll

(01:14:51):
you'll you'll never catch up. Yeah, don't fall for that. Now. Look,
if you have someone who pays your credit card bills
like like clockwork, that's me, God blessed. Get the mileage
you get you three saying, yeah, I'm bound fucking bucking
the system with that. I don't care. What they do
is zero percent interest for eighteen months, but bounce transfer.
Yeah that's terrific. It's great. Then when the eighteen months
is up, thirty percent interest on that money, No, you

(01:15:13):
better get that you get paid. Don't get that paid
off within those fucking within those thirty months, absolutely, or
get another zero percent and transfer to that one. All right,
play the game. Thanks for listening to the Finance Guys podcast.
It's the Finance Guys. Hey, hey, fine, we gotta go
excu well listen to Size Time. Yes please do

Speaker 3 (01:15:42):
Boys, boys,