October 7, 2025 • 45 mins
Paid to Talk is joined by one NZ’s most available guests, the boys chat to their mate Mike Lane. They discuss his youth, his vasectomy, starting the ACC, general circumcision chat, Leigh’s £3000 London bar tab and Cancer!
Catch more Paid To Talk, every Friday at 3pm on Radio Hauraki. Get set for a full-on assault on your sense of humour as Leigh and sparring partner Matt Ward delve into the big topics of the week.
Follow the boys on Instagram: @paidtotalk_podcast
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
This is an iHeart Radio New Zealand podcast. Well, I've
got you guys here, Lee. Can you do for Friday?
The third Friday? Third twenty?
Speaker 2 (00:21):
There's T twenty?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Is it? Black Cats Aussie?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
It's just hard to do one day once you've done
T twenties, it's hard to go back to mondays.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
You just want to do T twenties? Well, do you
just want to do one days? No?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
No, I'll prefer to do T twenties. Okay, I'm more
of a T twenty specialist. Okay, we'll lock you in
for the fourth inn Matt. You're on for the rugby,
aren't you that night? Because I'll do That's it in
the England series as well, which is like a week later.
Can I just put you in for all of the
T twenties? No?
Speaker 1 (00:48):
One days.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
You can put me in all, but I might have
to pull back out of them, out of some of them.
So easy. If you put me in, put me in for.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
All, and then I'll just pull back and probably end
up doing one of them. This is the kind of
stuff I'm kind of thinking maybe would have been best
done off off here before we.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Start of the podcast.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
It's sort a bit in the house, you're doing the
rugby in after the broadcast, they.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Do you want to kind of kick us last we can,
We'll welcome along to Pay to Talk another episode live
from the Eco Lodge for fully happing Matt Ward All
thanks to uber One, we.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Got a new sponsor on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
And when we started this podcast, we're always sort of saying,
you know, we're going to get some hard heading guests
in here. We're gonna we're not going to just sort
of fill voids with calling and favors and whatnot.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
But don't want to do it. You know, it's just
filling podcast with sort of your mates and stuff. You know,
my research says you've.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Got a hard hitting guests and you.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Know it's not just feeling avoid that you're sort of
contractually obligated.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Filling avoid and avoid Mike and that category.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
But having said that, joining us now a guy who
needs now introduction sending to the podcast world is my.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Claim, Well, great to be here, what an intro. Hey,
good to be at the Eco Lodge.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
My debut appearance at the Eco Lodge here as you say,
this is Mike Lane on our Circle Jerk special. Yeah,
you'd call it guests that we know, well, it feels
like yesterday.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
It literally was yesterday. It was Yeah, yeah, Mike, I'm
going to.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Take you right back if you can, If you can
just close your eyes and think back to where it
all began for you.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Born and bred in Hilton. Yep, okay, tell us about that. Now.
Did the tron gets a bad rap? The Tron? I
like the Tron.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I think any place that gets a bad rap must
be a cool place.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
Look, it was just far enough away from Auckland that
you could dabble in Auckland, but just close enough to
nowhere else where you were quite isolated as a teenager.
It was a good place to screw up.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
You don't get tainted with the you know, I'm from
Krayshach kind of thing. You don't get tainted with the
Auckland brush. You know, you're in North Ireland, which is
bad enough, but Hamilton there's got a enough Bogan in
it to not be Auckland.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
Yeah. More than chlamydia brush than we got tired with.
Because while I was there was the infamous Chlamydia triangle,
which was the three bars. It was the bank, the
outback and the loaded hog. Yes, and they traced back
ninety percent of the cases back to the triangle.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
So thatting equidistance between those three spots.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Yeah, they did go to all three of those when
you're a baron and all three of them just one
just the one the bank. Yeah, for your patient's err
but I don't think I was to be honest that
there's a lot of indential candidates. Hm hmmmm. Your father
was the doctor.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
There will be no changing to that kind of Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
It was a pretty open conversation around the dinner table.
Was the rate of chlamydia around around Hamilton? I mean
he removed a lot of foreskins as well. In Hamilton
he was known as doctor for skin. Not many, not
many doctors were prepared to move remove fours. So why
is that there was a size technical I just wasn't
overly brain. It wasn't well yeah, well no, I wasn't.
(04:03):
It wasn't really trendy, you know at that stage. Yeah.
I mean most of the removals were done for religious
purposes or cash only, all right, Because you see a
side house. I was thinking, is it like a home
surgery or I was done in a very sterile environment.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
But you know you've got a bet a mobile van
or something wul been kind good? Wouldn't it like a
panel vane? Let's move away from that. Obviously you went
to school there. Now, look, my first sort.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
Of interaction with U.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Spose has been through the ACC. We were joking about
it earlier on. It was about ten eleven years ago,
which I just can't believe. Be honest, you know, I
must have been at least twenty nine then, you know,
that's amazing how that that time flies.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Matt.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
But I'm guessing and from what I've seen from you,
you were kind of a sporty kind of kid, you know,
probably rugby and sort of cricket.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yeah, were you your typical key week.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Kid that probably had the aspirations to be in all
black or a black capes that you.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Yeah, one hundred percent. It was I finally gave away
my dream of being either a black cap or in
all black when I hit thirty, because before then, in
my mind, if I quit work, you've been trained for
two years, I reckon I could compete and a bit
of a bit of.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Luck going your way, a few people getting injured, and
you know.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
But you know, thirty and thirty, I was like, yeah,
it's not going to happen. Now, I was a good
schoolboy player. I played like red, cricket and rugby, but
there was about it. I discovered beers, beers and other
extracurricular activities at a young younger age, and just just enough.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
I mean it's appreciated. I think that would you be
the same.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
I mean a lot of people, I mean it doesn't
matter how good they are, they still by these I
could be in all black, I could be a cricket Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
No, I wasn't really the same.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
I was sort of I got to eighteen nineteen and
left school and realized how much I hate playing rugby, right,
I sort of forced to just because I was one
of five boys. So it's kind of just an expectation
that like that.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Myself, be honest. Yeah, I played with a lot of
people who went on to play for the black Caps,
like I played against Scott Styris. I played with the
Hamish Marshall and James Marshall and Tory and stuff. So
I played with a lot of but I was not.
I was never anywhere as good as them.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Yeah, But playing with those sort of people at that level,
you're getting to taste for it.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
You get these people like.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
Who decide am I going to go rugby, I'm going
to be an all black, I'm going to be a cricketer.
It was pretty easy for me to decide I'm not
gonna be either, you know, you know the decision was
made for me well early. So you can start focusing
on other stuff.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
You say that, Lee, but you've you've got a couple
of international scalps. See I haven't. So you've you've both
you've dismissed both the here Javelin grown Elliott and Martin Guppdal.
I'm glad you.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Brought up because it says me bringing it up, that's
going to and that was on my next I was
going to bing that.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
I'm up the break in the whole segment on that.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
But you brought that up so you wouldn't realize you
weren't going to be a black capa stage, but you
never lost a passion for it. And but you basically
became a full time base brigade that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Yeah, So I discovered that potentially my skills were bitter
used on past the sideline and over the boundary rope.
So started the Beige Brigade as what twenty year old
student in Canterbury got given a base shirt and wore
it around to all the games and everyone was like,
I was like, oh, where do you get that from?
I mean, that's where do you get that shirt from?
Speaker 3 (07:10):
Him?
Speaker 1 (07:11):
In those in years and I got asset so many
times that I thought maybe I should make some so
I did taught myself.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
So eighties New Zealand cricket eighties look who Brown?
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah, yeah it was, but we're pretty good. I think
it was a nostalgic time for a lot of key
cricket fans because they were actually pretty good but regularly
beat Australia. We had Martin Crowe Hadley, you know, icons
like Lance Ken's and John Wright, BRUCEI, Jeff Howardny Coney. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (07:39):
I think my first indirect contact with you would have
been back in the day when what have been the
late nineties earlier. Was that when the base we gave
us sort of yeah, that's kind of when it took
off a little bit. Yeah, Eden Park tearises and it
was a one day and there was there was obviously
beers involved and certain charts getting thrown out there and
there was I think the Indian crowd took exception to
(08:01):
some of the charts and there was a bit of
a bit of an altercation, but it was a.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Couple of Bay shirts involved in there. I think that
was back in the day when we got a bit
geopolitical on it with the Indian and they didn't appreciate.
I don't think they've ever been taken down that route
before by cricket fans, and so a little bit of
a kerfuffle resulted.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
It's what we're trying to do in a way.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
I mean, is it a frustration in a sense, and
also that our crowds are fairly dully know compared to
this maybe others, and try to bring some life into
the whole.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
I just don't think we're allowed to, you know what
I mean. I don't think there's a I think I
don't think naturally we're quiet in terms of fans. I'm
not passionate about it, but I don't think we've given
an environment in which we can express ourselves as opposed
to overseas, as opposed to the likes of America or
in Europe. You come to New Zealand and this is
just I don't know what it is, but our stadiums,
(08:55):
you're treated like a threat. As soon as you walk in,
you're not treated as a guest. So you walk in
and you're immediately under threat, You're searched, you're told you
can't do this, you can't do that. A better behave
yourself and invariably you behave terribly because that's what you
do when you treated You know, you treated terribly, You
behave terribly, and it's just kind of ruined. It's kind
of dulled down all the passion because you go to
(09:16):
a ground now and you don't feel welcome. It's overpriced.
You pain lots, and then you make a bit of
noise and you get accused of being drunk, and then
you get throng and then you go, well, I'm just
going to do this at home. That's slowly changing the
likes of Auckland f C and the likes of the
Warriors and stuff. They're embracing their fans a little bit
and letting the fans dictate terms a.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Little bit more and also less fair. Weare the fans
in a way.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
You know, the black Caps are not always going to win,
always going to lose, but you've got to support them
through good and bad, like you know European football teams,
you know, they're up and down and your team they're
losing most weeks, demanding who you sport?
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Yet you're still a fan.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Oh yeah, I've been a cricket fan in the in
the kind of nineties and early two thousands. It was
a pretty torrent, torrid time, so you had to have
a thick skin and you're in it for just going
to the because create was the reason we love cricket.
Paul Fortnite, it's like it's a full day on the
embankment and we only watching i'd say thirty forty percent
of the game. The rest of it is just having
(10:14):
beers talking absolute nonsense with your mates. You can dip
it an out of the game. That's what's so good
about going along to a live game. And then we've
just flipped that into a job by actually turning it
into a commentary. So we basically talk rubbish and we
watch it every now and then we talk rubbish.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, so before we talk about the AZEC, you're right
about the crowds and you think that's changing them. I
go back to the sevens and you remember that as well,
and the heyday of the sevens and Wellington.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Yeah, the redone, it was.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Fantastic and that of course people are getting dressed up.
That was a part of it. And sometimes they've got
their back to the game because they're engaging, but by
and large they are watching it. They're waiting for them
their games. But they I mean, I got banned from
drinking out of a rubber chicken with Ritz Sleets and Medley,
I suppose as one of the broadcasters and someone passing
(10:59):
me a rubber chicken with beer in it and having
to be on camera, and we got reprimanded the next
day about that, and they said you can't drink beer
out of a rubber chicken, which is fair enough.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Because I was, yeah, where they prefer you doing out
of a couple?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
So I said, what can I drink out of? And
they preferved and drink it all because I was broadcasting.
But what I mean is they stopped the Sevens of course,
because it will got too much of a party, and
that affected Wellington in look all we keep.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
It going to that.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
But they tried to make it like a family affair and.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
They went to Hamilton, and I think it's I don't
think it's going at all anymore.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
It's a it's a it's a real shame because I
think there is always going to be five percent of
any sporting crowd who al idiots, Yeah, he will probably
drink too much or swear they easily weaned out at
the time, and naturally a crowd, a community actually sorts
those people out usually anyway. But what's happened is the
rest of the ninety five percent are being treated the
(11:59):
same as that five percent. So and I feel sorry
for a lot of the stadiums in terms of their
in stadium experience because they are hamstrung by licensing and stuff.
That's why you go along and a half time you're
allowed one beer at a time, and so you there
with twelve mates or twelve you have to line up
at half time.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Twenty minutes before the end of the game. They've cut
it down now you're not allowed anything in the last
twenty minutes around in the UK years an hour and
a half after the game, and you're still in the
car park end of the stadium, not over drinking, but
talking about the game.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
Partying and yeah, and in the States is a big
trend in the States now as well. Within you FL
teams and MLB teams just getting people there two or
three hours early, and the only way to do that
is by providing one dollar hot dogs, five dollar beers,
getting people there for the for a longer period and
encouraging them and just feel like you've got a price
tag on your head. As soon as you come into
(12:50):
a big stadium here, it's like, okay, it's good for
rents to this guy as much as possible that I
know it's not what's happening, but that's what it feels
like as a fan. So it's going to be an
interesting a few years obviously. Like I said, the likes
of Walk and the f SE, I embraced the port
and their fans and I've given them an area and said,
you guys can do whatever you want. We'll we will
embrace it and will help you. And it's taken off
and people watch that on TV and actually you watch
(13:12):
the Port inn and you see them all singing and
you got and you know, even kids go like that
looks awesome. I want to be at that ground and
you go along and it's kind of self serving. Same
with the Warriors who will watch warriors on the ground.
It's a full stadium. You go to a super rugby,
watch a super rugby game's nowhere near yep, your kids
aren't going Hey can I go to that?
Speaker 3 (13:28):
You will take a quick break here if we can,
and we'll come back and talk with the ACC how
it started bout and when it's going to end hopefully.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Well, back to pay to Talk live from the Eco Lodge,
all thanks to Uber and special.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Guest Mike Clain with us and we're.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
Just talking ACC and how it all beganther link Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Well Lee kind of alluded to it. You know why
wins are going to end? And that's a good question
actually because when it started, I probably gave it a
couple of years, particularly how it started as well and
the kick deck two or three years when it did start. Yes,
But when we.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Talked about the frustration with as a fan and fans owns.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
Et cetera in New Zealand sport, did you have a
frustration then with the current broadcasting of sport?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Yeah. Well not many people will know this, but it
was actually New Zealand Cricket that started the Alternative Commentary
Collective because they were they were at the low of
the low. Remember they went to South Africa and got
a bowled out for forty five. It was the McCallum
Taylor fight and everything was. Cricket was at its lowest.
People were completely disengaged, they weren't performing. And we actually
(14:38):
had a friend at at an agency who was pitching
for their business for New Zealand Crickets, but its business.
We threw a few ideas around and we said, why, like,
why don't we do something that's slightly alternative, that's fan
based commentary, that it's what we do when we go
to the ground, which was drink beers, talk shit and
just engage with the game whenever we want. And so
(14:58):
we kind of pitched it thinking there's no way they'll
go for it. But they were in crisis. They were
looking to re engage fans. They're in a corner. They
were in a corner and they were they were, and
good on them. They took a risk and they said, okay,
look what do we have to lose here. So the
first year Juram and I did these alternative updates with
radio herdak He and we'll just do once an hour,
(15:19):
we'd do updates from the cricket and never give the
cricket score. It was always something to do with someone
in the crowd or whatever, which was probably a bit
too far because people actually wanted to know what the scores.
And then the next year they said, oh, we need
to go, but what do you reckon And we said, oh,
what if we get a caravan and we'll just do commentary.
At that stage, iHeartRadio had just come out, and this
is eleven years ago. Digital radio was feeling new to
(15:41):
people listening to radio on your phone and it was
fortunate for us because actually being on the radio is
quite an expensive operation. You've got frequencies and you've got
these overhead costs, you've got towers, you've got all sorts
of bits and pieces, whereas digital radio, internet connection and
you're away. All you need is the feedah from cricket. Yes,
(16:01):
you just need the sound effects and you're away. So
all the back window of a caravan a mba at
the cricket. So we so that first season our New
Zealand Cricket helped fund get us getting a caravan and
then we got a pretty motley crew together that we
thought would fit the bell in terms of.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
You thought knew something about cricket, didn't need to know
any about cricket.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
This was the thing only two or two or three
people needed to know about cricket, and that was probably
the people doing the ball by ball and it was
actually even better to have people who didn't know about
cricket to be in between and just talk nonsense. And
that's where your self likes yourself. And now peace came.
I thought it was one of the people that knew
the credit well stats wise, you were quite good. Yeah,
But anyway, that's how it started. It just started. It started,
(16:42):
and then we kind of knew that we were onto
something a little bit because obviously people were crying out
for something different. We didn't think the coverage was terrible
of cricket at the time, but it didn't appeal to us.
It was pretty boring.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
There was a void there, you know, and I mean
there was a there was a formality about it that
was the same voices were great voices by the way,
you know, and they're doing.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
A great job.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
But there was these people, as you say, sitting at
home watching the cricket who wanted to be more conversational
about it.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
But yes, you know, and there was a lot of Yeah,
there was a lot a disengaged fan, but there's also
a lot of fans who were kind of kind of
fifty to fifty though, oh cricket someone whatever. They needed
that little spark to come back into it, and I
like to think that we provided that because people would
be like, oh, what is this about, and then they'd listen.
We'd still give the score, would still give the updates
and everything. It would just provide a little bit of entertainment.
And funnily enough, a lot of particularly guys got to
(17:33):
listen to the cricket again at home because their wives
or partners were quite intrigued about what was going on
in this commentary because it felt like they were listening
into a locker room conversation. Because I'd be like, is
this what you guys talk about?
Speaker 3 (17:44):
You to say, there are actually a lot of people
listeners that came forward with that I've heard of anyway,
that never listened to Creckit at.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
All before that. Yeah, you know, you didn't need to
because I mean there's some of the stories and some
of the stuff with the angles we went on were
so wildly ridiculous that I didn't think you need to
be a cricket fan.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
And the timing is everything.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
As you say, Yeah, the cricket was on a bit
of a low witch but when we came in that
first year, they went on a high.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah. We was eighteen of twenty games, eighteen of the
first twenty all that I think we can. I think
we can because that was Brendan McCallum. That first series
was India, Brendan McCallum. It was a five match series.
We won that four nell and we had one tied
match and that was our first series in India. That
was India. That was when we charted the helicopter. Yep.
(18:31):
That was it was. It was a pretty wild three
or four weeks that one we were smugg We smuggled
in a mixologist to go and make cocktails in the
back of the caravan. The caravan was this trojan horse
that would come in with so much liquor in it.
Sometimes I can't remember leaving the ground like it was
pretty wild. It was pretty wild a couple of times.
(18:51):
I can't remember riving at the time. And that first
series because we were, like to be honest, like Jeremy
and I were putting together. We didn't know how long
it was going to last, so we were almost spit.
Every series was almost we were treating it like our last.
And then we went into the to the pre World
Cup series against Sri Lanka and then we managed to
get rights to do the World Cup. Yeah, and then
(19:12):
it just exploded from there. Really, any year, wasn't it. Yeah,
it was a very busy year because we did that
Indian series and then went straight into the World Cup.
Got thrown out of the World Cup, which is quite
commonly known.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
But it wasn't a conscious thing, was it. I mean
we certainly I used that word disrupt kind of thing.
I mean we were winding a lot of people up
the POW's it be in the International Cricket ICC, Yeah,
especially during the World Cup because they weren't used to
this kind of stuff. But that just kind of encouraged
us more, or probably encouraged you more because you kind
(19:45):
of got an anti your thority attitude to a degree,
which is a good thing and a lot of us do. Yeah,
I mean that's a good thing. But we sort of
felt that, you know totally. It was like every time
they see that we couldn't do something, we were like.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Yeah, why not? Yeah, well let's we got to get
around that.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Yeah, Like can you recall the first game of the
World Cup in christ Church Hagley Oval it was Sri Lanka,
New Zealand, and we had the right to be there.
We had the rights via the radio network at the time,
and we had the caravan and they remember they placed
the caravan over the back of the hill and amongst
some trees. We couldn't see anything. And then I said,
so we've got a TV signal so we can at
(20:22):
least watch the TV so we know it commentated anywhere.
And then and they said no, and we're like, well,
how are we supposed to call the game? And then
they were sold our problem and I'm like fuck. So
I had to go. I ad to fix this problem
because we've been doing it. So I had to go
to the broadcast compound and I knew they sold cabling
there because that's what they do, you know. So I
bought one hundred and fifty meters of CAP five cable
(20:42):
company credit card. Remember, I came back and plugged it
into the back of the TV and then we laid
it cable under the underneath the path and I climbed
the SCAFF tower and there's this poor operator camera operator
up there, that the Indian guy, and I chicked him
on the shoulder and he's like a TWI into the
output of his camera and he's like, and I'm like,
I'm in a beige suit. You guys are all drinking
(21:04):
gears down below the tower and he's like, coming back
is this? And then seriously, fine, we were we were
supposed to because someone was supposed to do that for us,
but they never wanted to help us, so they never
We'll get round to it. And then we were there
and everything was going fine, and then like the caters
(21:25):
would go past it because we were back a house,
we were in public. We were just in the middle.
Caters wud go past me with their trolleys and they'd
wave out to us, and then they'd just grab a
couple of boxes of beers and put them in the window.
And as they were doing that, a whole icy cee
delegation came past us and we were all in there
with our suits on the swimming switting away like liffing
beers and these people pining beers, and I can remember
(21:45):
them looking over and the discussion started and I knew
they were going here is that? And then especially we
had a chance going on something where the Rocky Donkeys.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
They were like cling I remember wellmington they put us,
but the bankers stating by the railway lines.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
We were facing the railway lines. We were literally facing
the railway lines. And again once again we didn't have
a TV signal. And I remember going into the operational
room this container and I knocked on the door and
like all these guys turned me and said, hey, yeah,
leaving my hand. Any chat to a feed anywhere. Every
(22:19):
game was the same, and then obviously we were like
you're saying, we were I felt like we were doing
it almost out of spite.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
By that stage, there was a sort of a bit
like when you have a something stance off small but
a sort of neighbors at war with your neighbor.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
It builds into us sort of an.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Escalates yes, and then we'll show them yeah. And then
there was then we went to Eating Park and it
was the Aussie game and Eating Park absolute thriller of
a game. And remember there they put us usually we
were down in the in the tunnel so we could
see the ground. They put us way back in the
tunnel and closed the gates on us. So there were
signs and everything and it and then we're like, how
(22:58):
don't we just push the caravan as close as we
can to the gates, so at least we can see
through the gates. And so we did that and and
they came down and the guy was steaming and goes,
how do you move the caravan? He was from the ICCs,
how dare you? And I'm like, I was like, oh,
we can't move it, like we need something to move it.
And he stormed off and goes, I'm coming back with security.
(23:19):
So I quickly ran off and I saw a groundsman's tractor,
a John Dere tractor, and I jumped on and I
had the keys in it, and I was like, oh,
this is good. So I started the tractor and I
drove the tractor right up against the caravan, up against
so physically could not be moved. Took the keys out
and jumped back in the caravan. And the guy comes
back with security and he goes, what And I said,
some groundsman's part with the trek. Then we can't move,
(23:40):
and he's like pilot and he goes and he goes,
where are the keys? I don't know where the keys are.
I wouldn't move it. And then I remember sitting on
commentary with Jeremy, and Jimmy goes, do you know where
the keys are and I just went so eventually, eventually
a groundsman came two hours later and moved it, and
then in the middle of the broadcast we had to
push it back five meters because an ICC official, and
(24:03):
then we had a bit of a to do with
him because we had a creditation that allowed us pitch side.
So when we were commentating, we went through the gates
and we stood behind the boundary behind the songs and
watched the game and a huge fight started there as
Jeremy and Paul weinst they had a massive fight with
an icy SA guy and it started to you. By
that stage, you'd gone home on your own, coord both.
(24:26):
I think that I think the beggst part of that
was when you left to go have some nine eyes
in the middle of the that day. We see clearly
you lived quite close by, so it was fine and
you and you leaned in to grab your phone and
you greenned and you didn't look what phone you were grabbing,
and you just went and you grabbed it, and you
grabbed our O two two one, and you left your
(24:48):
one and your one was going off like like a
frog and a sot and it was messages. It was
the wives ringing over and over and we're like, why
where's our two two one six Sid, We've got your
phone and we've got your ex wife ringing over again.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
On these thoughts, commentated that got banned from a ground, Yeah,
stand out from a ground.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
Yeah, you got markin, got frog batched out in the end,
But the so that culminated that was kind of building.
And then one Yeah, the straw that broke the camel's
back was napier when you jumped on the drinks trolley
with Pittsi who invited us to go on that. Ironically,
it was the one thing we did that we didn't
really want to do, but we were kind of obliged
to because of a sponsor, and it's the one thing
(25:29):
that got U kicked out.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
It was a sponsor's commitment.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
They wanted one of us to go out the gatorade
and a drinks break. Could have been any of us,
but just how it worked and ended up being me
that went out chatting to a couple of players, went
back ICC of course I'm out there match fixing or whatever.
They didn't they knew that it was just it was people.
Just to light the fact that we had that yeah,
(25:53):
access access I suppose it was hilarious because of the
end of that game.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
I mean, been at the airport and I turned my
phone back on and I had probably twenty miss calls
from one number, so ran it's never good. It's never good.
Rang that back and it was Dallas Gurney, who was
a head of sport from News or whatever, the radio network,
but he was in charge of radio sport and in
charge of the rights they had. And he said, first
(26:20):
words he said to me was like, please tell me
you didn't do it. And I was like, what the
guests the commentator's peraneum And he goes, no, okay, well
guess the commentator's milk or the jetsy and he goes no.
I was like, what is it? The are the two
worst things we did today? And he goes, tell me
you didn't steal a drinks trolley, drive it on the
(26:41):
field and interview players live on the field. And I
was like, no, that's actually one thing we didn't do.
We got invited on all that, and he goes he said,
it's too late. He didn't even make finish. He goes,
it's too late that you've been thrown out. They've gone
I mean, I don't want to throw them out of
the bus. But they threw us under the bus. Yeah,
they did.
Speaker 3 (26:57):
We had that meeting the following week. We were asked
to do it officially. We didn't want to do it.
That's the last thing we'd want to That's not the
sort of thing I would do. Or you, Yeah, jump
on there and.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Try to hijack again, hijack again. That's kind of cringey.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
Yeah, we do that.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
We were literally doing an official thing. But obviously in
the media everyone's saying, oh, yeah, typical, Yeah, wacky guys
trying to be cool. And then they said, look, you're
just going to have to take a hit on this
and make out it was you because the SEC is
all over us.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Yeah, and you're not going to stick up for us.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
And they said no, no, And then the story's got
more water. They got moved into match fixing, it moved
into like talking to the players and arrange because the
couple of players we passed you like, I think it
was a hereage have and gat to and walked on.
Then here was a couple of media who rated us
out as well, who were upset that we were on the
field because they had exclusive on field rights or whatever,
So it's kind of it was a mixture of but
(27:48):
the problem with us, the fact that we had to
actually probably lie down and take it was the litany
of ship that we've done for Yeah, we were happy
to take that. Yeah, because I was right about the.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
Meet before, so much shit on us already that we
were like, we're like, if we do fight this, they're
going to just turn around and just go what about this, this?
Speaker 1 (28:06):
This? And then Yeah, But in the end it was
the best thing that ever happened to us. We couldn't
go to the games because going to the games was great.
It was, so it was banned from all games, so
we were allowed to still broadcast. The negotiation. Negotiation was
we were allowed to still commentate, but we weren't allowed
(28:27):
at the grounds, so we were deemed just to be
disruptive for the grounds. So we had to then go
somewhere at a studio and get a feed and do
it from a studio. So we still covered the games,
but it just wasn't quite the same in the same
atmosphere because been at those games was incredible, like that
they're Eden parks, old ad eating park game. We didn't
get to go to the semi final with the Hairy Jab.
We had to do that from a studio, so it
(28:48):
took it away a little bit, but in the end,
if you look back on it, it.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Was a good thing. As far as awareness.
Speaker 3 (28:53):
We got a lot of publicity, not that we were
looking for that and they certainly weren't, but the everyday
people were reading the articles.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
You know, who are these people? And you know went
international and we are still the first and only commentary
team to be thrown out of a World Cup.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
I'm quite proud of that, and first and only to
have a besect me.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
But we'll talk about that and also how it's morphed
into perhaps right being other.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Things right after this break. So surely.
Speaker 4 (29:24):
Welcome back to Paige to talk life from the ecological
Thanks to uber one, we've got Mike Clane from the
ACC here obviously acc of the boss. I meet a
Tenure's radio Hdarchy boss as well, which was being the
boss for Leehart for ACC or Hodak you take more
years off your life?
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Wow. There was about a three year period there working
in an ACC and Hodaki were kind of intertwined. I
think potentially it was the beginning of the end of
a couple of marriages. But it was a great mind. Yeah,
I was that year and I'm not sure what's that worth.
Doubt exactly what it's worth. You go to GSD with it. Yeah,
(30:05):
that it was great fun running both and an the end,
one had to take priority out of the other in
terms of my passionalize with sports, so that's why they
kind of had to separate a little bit. And I
left RADIOHDEKI probably three or four years ago.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
And actually you know that the cricket, I mean I
mentioned some I don't know if a highlights and low
lights you've got to reseect me live on.
Speaker 2 (30:25):
I mean that wasn't purely for agents. You needed to
get the zect.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Yeah, I did see me booked in and I just
double booked it on the day that we played Australia
at eating Part. You're not going to miss that, no,
So I just decided to do both.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
You can get someone to fill in.
Speaker 3 (30:38):
You can get someone to fill in for the commentary,
but not for the you know, you've got.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
To have it. Yeah, So that was that was interesting
getting that done because it's an interesting procedure even if
you've had it done. But you father didn't do that, No,
I didn't get it. I wouldn't have trust him down there.
He's more a foury guy rather than tubes guy. But yeah,
that was an interesting afternoon. I felt sorry more for
Joe Jury who had to be on there and film
it with me. But I didn't forget that game. That
(31:03):
was the game that Marcus Thynus nearly nearly beat us in.
At the end, Mett Heath threatened to stomp on Josh
Hazeld's head at the end. It was a very eventful game.
But yeah, I'm always than one.
Speaker 3 (31:18):
Any real low lights, We've covering most of them. The
low lights are highlights. This is the thing.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
There's a mixture of it, yeah, because there's so many
stories of what we got up to. Probably a low
light is because we obviously always trying to like push
push the barrel, push it out a little bit, and
do things that you don't necessarily do, like we spent
We did a whole game on nos once that was interesting,
and when people asked us whether we were really doing it,
(31:43):
We're like, of course not, We're not that stupid, when
really we were that stupid. And then we had a
message one day and we were in a studio and
we had a message saying, Hey, I'm such and such.
I own a strip bar, a strip joint, whatever. We'll
seend someone around and I think we replied sure, didn't
give them an address or anything. And then about an
(32:04):
hour later there was a knock in the window and
there was a girl by the name of Darcy standing
outside the studio, girl by the name of Darsi, girl
by the name of Darcy, who was carrying what can
only be described as a suitcase, a weally bag suitcase.
And I sent Joe jury out and I said, can
you just find out what's going on. There was a Sunday,
so there was no one really else around, and she said, oh,
(32:24):
I've been sent down here apparently to do some shows.
I can do this there and the other. And Joe
just came in and said, you've got to come out
and sort this out. And so I went out and
I went, okay, what can you do? She just like
said some outrageous stuff around flames and balls, and I
was like, okay, well, and I was kind of trying
to think on my feet, and this is one thing
I do regret. This is a low light. I thought,
wouldn't it be funny if at the stage. We were
(32:47):
live streaming the video of the commentary team in the studio.
Wouldn't it be funny if she came in and she
stripped with her back to the camera and everyone on
the team ignored her, And it was actually worked perfectly.
And I said to whatever you do, don't turn around
and don't show any nudity you or stuff, because that's
going to probably get problematic for us. Word of advice,
never trust the strapper, because what happened was she went
(33:11):
and it worn't perfectly because in the air it was
Jason Hoyt, which was perfect, James mcconey and Matt Heath
and they were there were a huge debate around biscuits
and the biscuit eleven and who would be only in
the Batsman? Would it be Tim Tams and ginger Nuts whatever,
and so there was and they did not even give
her the time of day. They completely ignored her. So
it was actually quite funny. But then she obviously got
(33:33):
upset that they were ignoring so she didn't see the
gag in it. So she then climbs up on the desk,
removes her top, starts grinding on the desk like full
nudity and I was like, oh God, oh god, this
is going terribly wrong, and it's all been live streamed out.
My phone's lighting up, and I'm like, oh god God.
I had to ext how extract her off the desk,
(33:54):
extract things that she was using on the desk, which
was sponsored products. So you want to ever want to
see a mammoth mammoth milk bottle be used in an
appropriate way. It was fat, so it was also going
on snaggy jangyhead, so I may just go out of there.
And it just blew up because one of the sponsors
watched it and then got a hold of another sponsor
(34:16):
who got and all the sponsors knew and then obviously
and then it spread like wildfire. We quickly took it down,
tried to delete it, tried to big it ever happened,
And then it got to the CEO. CEO gets a
story that we had strippers in on a Sunday after
lean in the office, and all of a sudden it
became a big thing and I had to do this
big mere culpa and I like, and I just say, like,
it was a misjudgment. I thought I thought it was
(34:37):
going to be a gag. It went horribly wrong, and
it was about a week of me just with personally
ringing people apologizes. So that's home a good story, but
at the time it was terrible.
Speaker 2 (34:48):
And naturally morephen to rumpy and pretty quick. We're just
going now so you know.
Speaker 3 (34:53):
You're coming right of sports now, which is great Rugby
World cover course two thout fifteen.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
Your yes meant went over there. I don't know what
for beastity.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
We were there. We weren't commentating, No, we weren't. Twenty fifteen,
we got an invite from the All Black Tours guys.
They said, can you come and help host the planes?
They chatted two planes, remember the Beaver plane and the
ram Henry plane, the plane the Ted plane, and we
were like sure, I mean there's eight of us, so
he's fine, okay, And they made it. Remember they made
(35:21):
us do some gags on the Oh it's terrible, like
like no one wants to. When you're on a plane
and you start watching a movie, the last thing you
want to hear is someone get on the intercom and
start talking.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Because it stops you movie. Listen to this idiot speak.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
And this is where I learned where Jeremy Wells and
Lee Hart are experienced campaigners because they immediately said to
the guy, will go first. We'll go on the Auckland
to La leg straight away because everyone was fizzing. People
were quite hammered because they've all been drink excited they're
going to the World Cup. So Lee and Jeremy got on,
did a few gags and everyone was laughing bah, and
then they said, also, Matt Heath and Lane, you can
(35:55):
do LA to London. And so we get yeah, and
we get to La. Everyone's was hungover and we get
on the plane and when we said to the guy,
people want to hear from us, like you know, they
just want to want to sleep. He goes, nah, you've
got to you need to talk with baby. Yeah, need
to interview Bever. And we're like, oh no, like you know,
(36:17):
of course give and gets on. Everyone's deep in their movies.
We're wanting to go to sleep, and we're like, get
everyone here, you go. I was like, and then we're
getting abu, like we're getting heckled, like shut out losers.
We're like, oh, set and start. But we spent I
think we were in London for twelve days. We were
there for the semi and the final, but kind.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
Of rudding us as well. We had no there's no
commentary to do. It's just kind of quasi quasi.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Things, you know, we need to do commentary and commentary.
We hosted an event, a couple of like Q and
A events and stuff like that with the punters, but
ninety percent of the time we were idle hands, and
it was not good for idle hands to make bad decisions,
very bad decisions. Little hands end up in Amsterdam, speaking
(37:05):
of which I think you still there is you still
owe me because we give remember chicking out of that hotel.
We're going to go there that you talk about the
you lift it day early to go film some stuff
or hellas I think, yes, yes, And she left me
with the room bell. Now this is a twelve day
room bell.
Speaker 3 (37:23):
But bear in mind it wasn't on me because you yeah, yeah,
and there are other people were putting stuff.
Speaker 1 (37:29):
On our Yeah. The one thing I do remember is
checking out of that hotel each way Hilton, well it's
not a Hilton, and going to the counter and I'm
already full of anxiety and sweating anyway, after twelve days
of terrible behavior, so I'm riddled with no serotone and
nothing go up to the disk, and I said, I
need to clean up the bar tab for room twenty
one sixteen or something, and she's like okay. She goes
(37:54):
and she puts the thing down. I'm like, oh, six
hundred pounds, magnificent. And I put my credit card out
and she's like, sorry, sir, there's six more pages. And
I was like check chick, chick. Oh my god, and
then I've seen I was. I was so dumbfounded there
for a while that they actually took me out the
back into a room where I had to go through
(38:16):
line by line and it started, you don't know, it
started at five thousand pounds. So I had to go
through all the miniatures and say, look, you can go
to our room. We didn't drink the miniatures, which I
can't believe we didn't because I was still on the shelf,
and so all the miniature charges came off. So that
was fifteen hundred pounds wiped off it. So you think
about that, this was three thousand dollars. It's a bonus.
(38:37):
So I'm like, okay, I'm down to three thousand, five
hundred pounds and then I'm looking at it going bucket
of Peroni three thirty. Yeah, that's definitely us two buckets
of Peronis, four buckets, so Pernis. I'm like, I couldn't
argue with the sheer volume of Peronis that were on it.
And then I did, okay, I'll pay this tree and
(38:59):
a half thousand pounds and then and I put my
cart down and to climb, so I just split it
across to credit cards and then I've been then you
seeing me a message scene get as well? What was
the wash up? How was it? Pretty bad? Pretty bad?
(39:21):
It was no good.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
It's all good. Cancer brings it down to it.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
Yeah, you had a bit of a interest, scared a
bit of a episode, I suppose.
Speaker 1 (39:43):
Yeah, talk us to that. Yeah, that was that was interesting.
That was about five years ago. Now try to bring
that up mac ratings. Do you want that? Do you
want me to cry?
Speaker 2 (39:53):
If you could?
Speaker 1 (39:53):
Yeah, if you could, I'll try. So you know, that
was about five years ago. I had a little lump
on my forehead which wasn't and wasn't a mole or anything.
It was just a little lump and I got win
and got it checked out and the GP ah, you've
got a bit of a syst there. I'll get rid
of that, and GPS are pretty keen to get the
scalpel out. So you got there, put a bit of
local and set it around my forehead and start slicing away.
(40:15):
And he's removing it. And I could tell immediately because
he was like, hill have gone on here than I thought,
and he could scrap it around a bit more. Anyway,
he said, I probably should send this way to get tested,
and it kind of the back of my mind, I
was like, I don't think it's nothing. And then a
week later got a positive result for a DFSP, which
the dermo fibrosis so comia pertubian, which is a very
rare and slow growing.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
Some just appears there's no reason to it. No, it's
just completely random, so random.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
In fact, it's a cancer most commonly found an African
American woman on their abdomens, and I was a middle
aged white guy right in the middle of my forehead,
so I had the only way to get rid of
them is by surgery. So you had to get it
surgically removed. So I then went and got a couple
of days of mose surgery, which they take a margin
around here and then they test it to see because
(41:01):
it's basically like a spider, so it's kind of spreads
like that, so you've got tentacles that go off. So
they had to take margins margins. And now after two
days of that, and I was awake during those ones,
that was pretty horrible. And then they said this is
too big. You're going to have to go under a general.
And then I went under a general and I came
back from that general with what can only be described
as a cherry pie on my forehead. They went right
down to my skull, took three mile off my skull
(41:23):
to get rid of it. So I was left with
this John Normals hole in my head. But it's kind
of I don't know how you approach. It's kind of
weird when you get diagnosed or something like that, because
you don't you kind of everything kind of comes into
focus and you kind of don't worry about anything else.
You just worry about getting yourself better, and you go,
what do I need to do? And the doctors you
gotta get rid of it. I said, okay, fine, this
is that's work on that. You get rid of it
(41:46):
and then what's next, Well, next is probably make repairing
the cherry pie. Okay, what to do this skin graft
and what do I have to do now? Well, we
have to make let it heal and then we'll do
it again and do a reconstruction. What do I do now?
So you kind of just you just you can't departmentalize
everything they knew.
Speaker 3 (42:04):
Okay, it's not it's not going to get worse. It's
more of a surgery thing. It was there a time
where you got this could be.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
It was one time because the first time they operated,
they said we got rid of it. And then the
next operation they said, oh, this is a little bit
more that we just need to sort out. And I'm like,
what do you mean you didn't get it? No, I
don't think so. And that's when I was like, oh, okay,
But they did get rid of it because I went
and got a pet skin after that and it was
all gone. So that was fine. But then I had
(42:32):
to go through with the reconstruction of my forehead here,
so I can't move my forehead anymore. It's all because
I've done a pretty good job they have. Well. Famously,
I got the tits put on my head as well.
I got two expansion tissue expanders in here, and then
they flapped it across and covered it up. So it's
all gone now. But it was a hell of a
five years. Yeah, And I had to approach it pretty
(42:53):
straight on because otherwise you are there's two options you got.
You can either feel sorry for yourself, sit at home
and hide away, or you can just front foot it.
I mean to work with these big tits on my
head every.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Day, change your perspective on stuff, and generally little bit
a little.
Speaker 1 (43:07):
I suppose it to change your in terms of your priorities.
I guess was probably the biggest thing in terms of
spending more time with your family and stuff like that
or whatever kind of put into perspective. Because I was
working pretty hard up until that point, Like that was up.
It was kind of just before COVID, we're going pretty
hard with the a SEC. And I suppose once COVID hit,
I got that and everyn kind of slowed down a
(43:27):
little bit. And it can prioritize pretty hard of you.
Speaker 3 (43:31):
If you ask me, just just in wrapping up, then
what's next? Not so much of the a SEC. I
can just see that carrying on, and but how about
you know, and the big picture sort of things like
it's almost like the lunatics taking over the asylum to
a degree. I mean, can you see yourself perhaps moving
into a field perhaps with New Zealand cricket or rugby
(43:55):
that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1 (43:56):
Yeah, yeah, mind, as you say, it's a fans it's
a fans world.
Speaker 2 (44:01):
They need to see it from a fan's perspective.
Speaker 3 (44:03):
So should some of these entities us on rugby, cricket,
et cetera, perhaps be bringing on people who see it
from a fans perspective.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
Yeah, I've thought about that actually, and that is in
terms of we we treat of it. Do treat up
in fans terribly here for whatever reason, And that's all
it is about, is fancy entertainment. That's what it is. Yeah,
And I really I'm really kind of envious of America
and envious a little bit of even Australia a little
bit about their fan experience and what they do, because
I think, for ages, the fan experience in New Zealander
(44:35):
get a DJ in the ground and play loud music
and then get some boomsticks and some tinsel wigs and
you know, tick the box. But it's it's a bit
deeper than that. So yeah, I mean, look, that's probably
why I will go, you're right, because at some stage
I'm going to be completely irrelevant and the stuff we
do is going to be irrelevant.
Speaker 2 (44:51):
Well, I don't think so. I think it's is relevant.
That's the point. It's all.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
It's a learning, it's a training ground for for that,
for that next job, so that you know, we've got
to be able to give them the best here as
an entertainment package.
Speaker 1 (45:05):
Totally. Yeah, it's gonna be Yeah, it's gonna be interesting.
Kind of next ten years, the ACC will kind of well,
we'll bubble away. We'll kind of keep innovating and keep
doing new stuff. Obviously, the podcast Realm has been good
obviously getting into more YouTube and video along with the
commentary as well. How we can reinvent that channels changing
platform every day is a platforms changing so you just
(45:25):
got adapt with Yeah, totally. You just gotta roll the
punches and digital. It's pretty good because you can fail
super fast. You just turn it off. People aren't watching
or listening. You just stop, whereas's hard to do in
that mainstream because you're so invested. You have to make
it work.
Speaker 2 (45:37):
Well, I'm sure they're still listening to this. On that note,
we'll live there, I got.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
Can I stay the night in the cological of course? Yeah,
just keeck on.
Speaker 2 (45:47):
Now you're back to twenty third and I can't do
that one you did.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
You could do the tween you said, you said all
t twenties you could do. Okay, well it
This is an iHeart Radio New Zealand podcast. Well, I've
got you guys here, Lee. Can you do for Friday?
The third Friday? Third twenty?
Speaker 2 (00:21):
There's T twenty?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Is it? Black Cats Aussie?
Speaker 3 (00:23):
It's just hard to do one day once you've done
T twenties, it's hard to go back to mondays.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
You just want to do T twenties? Well, do you
just want to do one days? No?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
No, I'll prefer to do T twenties. Okay, I'm more
of a T twenty specialist. Okay, we'll lock you in
for the fourth inn Matt. You're on for the rugby,
aren't you that night? Because I'll do That's it in
the England series as well, which is like a week later.
Can I just put you in for all of the
T twenties? No?
Speaker 1 (00:48):
One days.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
You can put me in all, but I might have
to pull back out of them, out of some of them.
So easy. If you put me in, put me in for.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
All, and then I'll just pull back and probably end
up doing one of them. This is the kind of
stuff I'm kind of thinking maybe would have been best
done off off here before we.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Start of the podcast.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
It's sort a bit in the house, you're doing the
rugby in after the broadcast, they.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Do you want to kind of kick us last we can,
We'll welcome along to Pay to Talk another episode live
from the Eco Lodge for fully happing Matt Ward All
thanks to uber One, we.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Got a new sponsor on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
And when we started this podcast, we're always sort of saying,
you know, we're going to get some hard heading guests
in here. We're gonna we're not going to just sort
of fill voids with calling and favors and whatnot.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
But don't want to do it. You know, it's just
filling podcast with sort of your mates and stuff. You know,
my research says you've.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Got a hard hitting guests and you.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Know it's not just feeling avoid that you're sort of
contractually obligated.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Filling avoid and avoid Mike and that category.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
But having said that, joining us now a guy who
needs now introduction sending to the podcast world is my.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Claim, Well, great to be here, what an intro. Hey,
good to be at the Eco Lodge.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
My debut appearance at the Eco Lodge here as you say,
this is Mike Lane on our Circle Jerk special. Yeah,
you'd call it guests that we know, well, it feels
like yesterday.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
It literally was yesterday. It was Yeah, yeah, Mike, I'm
going to.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Take you right back if you can, If you can
just close your eyes and think back to where it
all began for you.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Born and bred in Hilton. Yep, okay, tell us about that. Now.
Did the tron gets a bad rap? The Tron? I
like the Tron.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
I think any place that gets a bad rap must
be a cool place.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
Look, it was just far enough away from Auckland that
you could dabble in Auckland, but just close enough to
nowhere else where you were quite isolated as a teenager.
It was a good place to screw up.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
You don't get tainted with the you know, I'm from
Krayshach kind of thing. You don't get tainted with the
Auckland brush. You know, you're in North Ireland, which is
bad enough, but Hamilton there's got a enough Bogan in
it to not be Auckland.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
Yeah. More than chlamydia brush than we got tired with.
Because while I was there was the infamous Chlamydia triangle,
which was the three bars. It was the bank, the
outback and the loaded hog. Yes, and they traced back
ninety percent of the cases back to the triangle.
Speaker 4 (03:17):
So thatting equidistance between those three spots.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Yeah, they did go to all three of those when
you're a baron and all three of them just one
just the one the bank. Yeah, for your patient's err
but I don't think I was to be honest that
there's a lot of indential candidates. Hm hmmmm. Your father
was the doctor.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
There will be no changing to that kind of Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
It was a pretty open conversation around the dinner table.
Was the rate of chlamydia around around Hamilton? I mean
he removed a lot of foreskins as well. In Hamilton
he was known as doctor for skin. Not many, not
many doctors were prepared to move remove fours. So why
is that there was a size technical I just wasn't
overly brain. It wasn't well yeah, well no, I wasn't.
(04:03):
It wasn't really trendy, you know at that stage. Yeah.
I mean most of the removals were done for religious
purposes or cash only, all right, Because you see a
side house. I was thinking, is it like a home
surgery or I was done in a very sterile environment.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
But you know you've got a bet a mobile van
or something wul been kind good? Wouldn't it like a
panel vane? Let's move away from that. Obviously you went
to school there. Now, look, my first sort.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
Of interaction with U.
Speaker 3 (04:30):
Spose has been through the ACC. We were joking about
it earlier on. It was about ten eleven years ago,
which I just can't believe. Be honest, you know, I
must have been at least twenty nine then, you know,
that's amazing how that that time flies.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Matt.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
But I'm guessing and from what I've seen from you,
you were kind of a sporty kind of kid, you know,
probably rugby and sort of cricket.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yeah, were you your typical key week.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Kid that probably had the aspirations to be in all
black or a black capes that you.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Yeah, one hundred percent. It was I finally gave away
my dream of being either a black cap or in
all black when I hit thirty, because before then, in
my mind, if I quit work, you've been trained for
two years, I reckon I could compete and a bit
of a bit of.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Luck going your way, a few people getting injured, and
you know.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
But you know, thirty and thirty, I was like, yeah,
it's not going to happen. Now, I was a good
schoolboy player. I played like red, cricket and rugby, but
there was about it. I discovered beers, beers and other
extracurricular activities at a young younger age, and just just enough.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
I mean it's appreciated. I think that would you be
the same.
Speaker 3 (05:34):
I mean a lot of people, I mean it doesn't
matter how good they are, they still by these I
could be in all black, I could be a cricket Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
No, I wasn't really the same.
Speaker 4 (05:44):
I was sort of I got to eighteen nineteen and
left school and realized how much I hate playing rugby, right,
I sort of forced to just because I was one
of five boys. So it's kind of just an expectation
that like that.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Myself, be honest. Yeah, I played with a lot of
people who went on to play for the black Caps,
like I played against Scott Styris. I played with the
Hamish Marshall and James Marshall and Tory and stuff. So
I played with a lot of but I was not.
I was never anywhere as good as them.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Yeah, But playing with those sort of people at that level,
you're getting to taste for it.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
You get these people like.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
Who decide am I going to go rugby, I'm going
to be an all black, I'm going to be a cricketer.
It was pretty easy for me to decide I'm not
gonna be either, you know, you know the decision was
made for me well early. So you can start focusing
on other stuff.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
You say that, Lee, but you've you've got a couple
of international scalps. See I haven't. So you've you've both
you've dismissed both the here Javelin grown Elliott and Martin Guppdal.
I'm glad you.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Brought up because it says me bringing it up, that's
going to and that was on my next I was
going to bing that.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
I'm up the break in the whole segment on that.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
But you brought that up so you wouldn't realize you
weren't going to be a black capa stage, but you
never lost a passion for it. And but you basically
became a full time base brigade that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Yeah, So I discovered that potentially my skills were bitter
used on past the sideline and over the boundary rope.
So started the Beige Brigade as what twenty year old
student in Canterbury got given a base shirt and wore
it around to all the games and everyone was like,
I was like, oh, where do you get that from?
I mean, that's where do you get that shirt from?
Speaker 3 (07:10):
Him?
Speaker 1 (07:11):
In those in years and I got asset so many
times that I thought maybe I should make some so
I did taught myself.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
So eighties New Zealand cricket eighties look who Brown?
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah, yeah it was, but we're pretty good. I think
it was a nostalgic time for a lot of key
cricket fans because they were actually pretty good but regularly
beat Australia. We had Martin Crowe Hadley, you know, icons
like Lance Ken's and John Wright, BRUCEI, Jeff Howardny Coney. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (07:39):
I think my first indirect contact with you would have
been back in the day when what have been the
late nineties earlier. Was that when the base we gave
us sort of yeah, that's kind of when it took
off a little bit. Yeah, Eden Park tearises and it
was a one day and there was there was obviously
beers involved and certain charts getting thrown out there and
there was I think the Indian crowd took exception to
(08:01):
some of the charts and there was a bit of
a bit of an altercation, but it was a.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Couple of Bay shirts involved in there. I think that
was back in the day when we got a bit
geopolitical on it with the Indian and they didn't appreciate.
I don't think they've ever been taken down that route
before by cricket fans, and so a little bit of
a kerfuffle resulted.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
It's what we're trying to do in a way.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
I mean, is it a frustration in a sense, and
also that our crowds are fairly dully know compared to
this maybe others, and try to bring some life into
the whole.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
I just don't think we're allowed to, you know what
I mean. I don't think there's a I think I
don't think naturally we're quiet in terms of fans. I'm
not passionate about it, but I don't think we've given
an environment in which we can express ourselves as opposed
to overseas, as opposed to the likes of America or
in Europe. You come to New Zealand and this is
just I don't know what it is, but our stadiums,
(08:55):
you're treated like a threat. As soon as you walk in,
you're not treated as a guest. So you walk in
and you're immediately under threat, You're searched, you're told you
can't do this, you can't do that. A better behave
yourself and invariably you behave terribly because that's what you
do when you treated You know, you treated terribly, You
behave terribly, and it's just kind of ruined. It's kind
of dulled down all the passion because you go to
(09:16):
a ground now and you don't feel welcome. It's overpriced.
You pain lots, and then you make a bit of
noise and you get accused of being drunk, and then
you get throng and then you go, well, I'm just
going to do this at home. That's slowly changing the
likes of Auckland f C and the likes of the
Warriors and stuff. They're embracing their fans a little bit
and letting the fans dictate terms a.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
Little bit more and also less fair. Weare the fans
in a way.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
You know, the black Caps are not always going to win,
always going to lose, but you've got to support them
through good and bad, like you know European football teams,
you know, they're up and down and your team they're
losing most weeks, demanding who you sport?
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Yet you're still a fan.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Oh yeah, I've been a cricket fan in the in
the kind of nineties and early two thousands. It was
a pretty torrent, torrid time, so you had to have
a thick skin and you're in it for just going
to the because create was the reason we love cricket.
Paul Fortnite, it's like it's a full day on the
embankment and we only watching i'd say thirty forty percent
of the game. The rest of it is just having
(10:14):
beers talking absolute nonsense with your mates. You can dip
it an out of the game. That's what's so good
about going along to a live game. And then we've
just flipped that into a job by actually turning it
into a commentary. So we basically talk rubbish and we
watch it every now and then we talk rubbish.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, so before we talk about the AZEC, you're right
about the crowds and you think that's changing them. I
go back to the sevens and you remember that as well,
and the heyday of the sevens and Wellington.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Yeah, the redone, it was.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Fantastic and that of course people are getting dressed up.
That was a part of it. And sometimes they've got
their back to the game because they're engaging, but by
and large they are watching it. They're waiting for them
their games. But they I mean, I got banned from
drinking out of a rubber chicken with Ritz Sleets and Medley,
I suppose as one of the broadcasters and someone passing
(10:59):
me a rubber chicken with beer in it and having
to be on camera, and we got reprimanded the next
day about that, and they said you can't drink beer
out of a rubber chicken, which is fair enough.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Because I was, yeah, where they prefer you doing out
of a couple?
Speaker 3 (11:14):
So I said, what can I drink out of? And
they preferved and drink it all because I was broadcasting.
But what I mean is they stopped the Sevens of course,
because it will got too much of a party, and
that affected Wellington in look all we keep.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
It going to that.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
But they tried to make it like a family affair and.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
They went to Hamilton, and I think it's I don't
think it's going at all anymore.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
It's a it's a it's a real shame because I
think there is always going to be five percent of
any sporting crowd who al idiots, Yeah, he will probably
drink too much or swear they easily weaned out at
the time, and naturally a crowd, a community actually sorts
those people out usually anyway. But what's happened is the
rest of the ninety five percent are being treated the
(11:59):
same as that five percent. So and I feel sorry
for a lot of the stadiums in terms of their
in stadium experience because they are hamstrung by licensing and stuff.
That's why you go along and a half time you're
allowed one beer at a time, and so you there
with twelve mates or twelve you have to line up
at half time.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
Twenty minutes before the end of the game. They've cut
it down now you're not allowed anything in the last
twenty minutes around in the UK years an hour and
a half after the game, and you're still in the
car park end of the stadium, not over drinking, but
talking about the game.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
Partying and yeah, and in the States is a big
trend in the States now as well. Within you FL
teams and MLB teams just getting people there two or
three hours early, and the only way to do that
is by providing one dollar hot dogs, five dollar beers,
getting people there for the for a longer period and
encouraging them and just feel like you've got a price
tag on your head. As soon as you come into
(12:50):
a big stadium here, it's like, okay, it's good for
rents to this guy as much as possible that I
know it's not what's happening, but that's what it feels
like as a fan. So it's going to be an
interesting a few years obviously. Like I said, the likes
of Walk and the f SE, I embraced the port
and their fans and I've given them an area and said,
you guys can do whatever you want. We'll we will
embrace it and will help you. And it's taken off
and people watch that on TV and actually you watch
(13:12):
the Port inn and you see them all singing and
you got and you know, even kids go like that
looks awesome. I want to be at that ground and
you go along and it's kind of self serving. Same
with the Warriors who will watch warriors on the ground.
It's a full stadium. You go to a super rugby,
watch a super rugby game's nowhere near yep, your kids
aren't going Hey can I go to that?
Speaker 3 (13:28):
You will take a quick break here if we can,
and we'll come back and talk with the ACC how
it started bout and when it's going to end hopefully.
Speaker 4 (13:38):
Well, back to pay to Talk live from the Eco Lodge,
all thanks to Uber and special.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Guest Mike Clain with us and we're.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
Just talking ACC and how it all beganther link Yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Well Lee kind of alluded to it. You know why
wins are going to end? And that's a good question
actually because when it started, I probably gave it a
couple of years, particularly how it started as well and
the kick deck two or three years when it did start. Yes,
But when we.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Talked about the frustration with as a fan and fans owns.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
Et cetera in New Zealand sport, did you have a
frustration then with the current broadcasting of sport?
Speaker 1 (14:17):
Yeah. Well not many people will know this, but it
was actually New Zealand Cricket that started the Alternative Commentary
Collective because they were they were at the low of
the low. Remember they went to South Africa and got
a bowled out for forty five. It was the McCallum
Taylor fight and everything was. Cricket was at its lowest.
People were completely disengaged, they weren't performing. And we actually
(14:38):
had a friend at at an agency who was pitching
for their business for New Zealand Crickets, but its business.
We threw a few ideas around and we said, why, like,
why don't we do something that's slightly alternative, that's fan
based commentary, that it's what we do when we go
to the ground, which was drink beers, talk shit and
just engage with the game whenever we want. And so
(14:58):
we kind of pitched it thinking there's no way they'll
go for it. But they were in crisis. They were
looking to re engage fans. They're in a corner. They
were in a corner and they were they were, and
good on them. They took a risk and they said, okay,
look what do we have to lose here. So the
first year Juram and I did these alternative updates with
radio herdak He and we'll just do once an hour,
(15:19):
we'd do updates from the cricket and never give the
cricket score. It was always something to do with someone
in the crowd or whatever, which was probably a bit
too far because people actually wanted to know what the scores.
And then the next year they said, oh, we need
to go, but what do you reckon And we said, oh,
what if we get a caravan and we'll just do commentary.
At that stage, iHeartRadio had just come out, and this
is eleven years ago. Digital radio was feeling new to
(15:41):
people listening to radio on your phone and it was
fortunate for us because actually being on the radio is
quite an expensive operation. You've got frequencies and you've got
these overhead costs, you've got towers, you've got all sorts
of bits and pieces, whereas digital radio, internet connection and
you're away. All you need is the feedah from cricket. Yes,
(16:01):
you just need the sound effects and you're away. So
all the back window of a caravan a mba at
the cricket. So we so that first season our New
Zealand Cricket helped fund get us getting a caravan and
then we got a pretty motley crew together that we
thought would fit the bell in terms of.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
You thought knew something about cricket, didn't need to know
any about cricket.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
This was the thing only two or two or three
people needed to know about cricket, and that was probably
the people doing the ball by ball and it was
actually even better to have people who didn't know about
cricket to be in between and just talk nonsense. And
that's where your self likes yourself. And now peace came.
I thought it was one of the people that knew
the credit well stats wise, you were quite good. Yeah,
But anyway, that's how it started. It just started. It started,
(16:42):
and then we kind of knew that we were onto
something a little bit because obviously people were crying out
for something different. We didn't think the coverage was terrible
of cricket at the time, but it didn't appeal to us.
It was pretty boring.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
There was a void there, you know, and I mean
there was a there was a formality about it that
was the same voices were great voices by the way,
you know, and they're doing.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
A great job.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
But there was these people, as you say, sitting at
home watching the cricket who wanted to be more conversational
about it.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
But yes, you know, and there was a lot of Yeah,
there was a lot a disengaged fan, but there's also
a lot of fans who were kind of kind of
fifty to fifty though, oh cricket someone whatever. They needed
that little spark to come back into it, and I
like to think that we provided that because people would
be like, oh, what is this about, and then they'd listen.
We'd still give the score, would still give the updates
and everything. It would just provide a little bit of entertainment.
And funnily enough, a lot of particularly guys got to
(17:33):
listen to the cricket again at home because their wives
or partners were quite intrigued about what was going on
in this commentary because it felt like they were listening
into a locker room conversation. Because I'd be like, is
this what you guys talk about?
Speaker 3 (17:44):
You to say, there are actually a lot of people
listeners that came forward with that I've heard of anyway,
that never listened to Creckit at.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
All before that. Yeah, you know, you didn't need to
because I mean there's some of the stories and some
of the stuff with the angles we went on were
so wildly ridiculous that I didn't think you need to
be a cricket fan.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
And the timing is everything.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
As you say, Yeah, the cricket was on a bit
of a low witch but when we came in that
first year, they went on a high.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah. We was eighteen of twenty games, eighteen of the
first twenty all that I think we can. I think
we can because that was Brendan McCallum. That first series
was India, Brendan McCallum. It was a five match series.
We won that four nell and we had one tied
match and that was our first series in India. That
was India. That was when we charted the helicopter. Yep.
(18:31):
That was it was. It was a pretty wild three
or four weeks that one we were smugg We smuggled
in a mixologist to go and make cocktails in the
back of the caravan. The caravan was this trojan horse
that would come in with so much liquor in it.
Sometimes I can't remember leaving the ground like it was
pretty wild. It was pretty wild a couple of times.
(18:51):
I can't remember riving at the time. And that first
series because we were, like to be honest, like Jeremy
and I were putting together. We didn't know how long
it was going to last, so we were almost spit.
Every series was almost we were treating it like our last.
And then we went into the to the pre World
Cup series against Sri Lanka and then we managed to
get rights to do the World Cup. Yeah, and then
(19:12):
it just exploded from there. Really, any year, wasn't it. Yeah,
it was a very busy year because we did that
Indian series and then went straight into the World Cup.
Got thrown out of the World Cup, which is quite
commonly known.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
But it wasn't a conscious thing, was it. I mean
we certainly I used that word disrupt kind of thing.
I mean we were winding a lot of people up
the POW's it be in the International Cricket ICC, Yeah,
especially during the World Cup because they weren't used to
this kind of stuff. But that just kind of encouraged
us more, or probably encouraged you more because you kind
(19:45):
of got an anti your thority attitude to a degree,
which is a good thing and a lot of us do. Yeah,
I mean that's a good thing. But we sort of
felt that, you know totally. It was like every time
they see that we couldn't do something, we were like.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Yeah, why not? Yeah, well let's we got to get
around that.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Yeah, Like can you recall the first game of the
World Cup in christ Church Hagley Oval it was Sri Lanka,
New Zealand, and we had the right to be there.
We had the rights via the radio network at the time,
and we had the caravan and they remember they placed
the caravan over the back of the hill and amongst
some trees. We couldn't see anything. And then I said,
so we've got a TV signal so we can at
(20:22):
least watch the TV so we know it commentated anywhere.
And then and they said no, and we're like, well,
how are we supposed to call the game? And then
they were sold our problem and I'm like fuck. So
I had to go. I ad to fix this problem
because we've been doing it. So I had to go
to the broadcast compound and I knew they sold cabling
there because that's what they do, you know. So I
bought one hundred and fifty meters of CAP five cable
(20:42):
company credit card. Remember, I came back and plugged it
into the back of the TV and then we laid
it cable under the underneath the path and I climbed
the SCAFF tower and there's this poor operator camera operator
up there, that the Indian guy, and I chicked him
on the shoulder and he's like a TWI into the
output of his camera and he's like, and I'm like,
I'm in a beige suit. You guys are all drinking
(21:04):
gears down below the tower and he's like, coming back
is this? And then seriously, fine, we were we were
supposed to because someone was supposed to do that for us,
but they never wanted to help us, so they never
We'll get round to it. And then we were there
and everything was going fine, and then like the caters
(21:25):
would go past it because we were back a house,
we were in public. We were just in the middle.
Caters wud go past me with their trolleys and they'd
wave out to us, and then they'd just grab a
couple of boxes of beers and put them in the window.
And as they were doing that, a whole icy cee
delegation came past us and we were all in there
with our suits on the swimming switting away like liffing
beers and these people pining beers, and I can remember
(21:45):
them looking over and the discussion started and I knew
they were going here is that? And then especially we
had a chance going on something where the Rocky Donkeys.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
They were like cling I remember wellmington they put us,
but the bankers stating by the railway lines.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
We were facing the railway lines. We were literally facing
the railway lines. And again once again we didn't have
a TV signal. And I remember going into the operational
room this container and I knocked on the door and
like all these guys turned me and said, hey, yeah,
leaving my hand. Any chat to a feed anywhere. Every
(22:19):
game was the same, and then obviously we were like
you're saying, we were I felt like we were doing
it almost out of spite.
Speaker 3 (22:26):
By that stage, there was a sort of a bit
like when you have a something stance off small but
a sort of neighbors at war with your neighbor.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
It builds into us sort of an.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Escalates yes, and then we'll show them yeah. And then
there was then we went to Eating Park and it
was the Aussie game and Eating Park absolute thriller of
a game. And remember there they put us usually we
were down in the in the tunnel so we could
see the ground. They put us way back in the
tunnel and closed the gates on us. So there were
signs and everything and it and then we're like, how
(22:58):
don't we just push the caravan as close as we
can to the gates, so at least we can see
through the gates. And so we did that and and
they came down and the guy was steaming and goes,
how do you move the caravan? He was from the ICCs,
how dare you? And I'm like, I was like, oh,
we can't move it, like we need something to move it.
And he stormed off and goes, I'm coming back with security.
(23:19):
So I quickly ran off and I saw a groundsman's tractor,
a John Dere tractor, and I jumped on and I
had the keys in it, and I was like, oh,
this is good. So I started the tractor and I
drove the tractor right up against the caravan, up against
so physically could not be moved. Took the keys out
and jumped back in the caravan. And the guy comes
back with security and he goes, what And I said,
some groundsman's part with the trek. Then we can't move,
(23:40):
and he's like pilot and he goes and he goes,
where are the keys? I don't know where the keys are.
I wouldn't move it. And then I remember sitting on
commentary with Jeremy, and Jimmy goes, do you know where
the keys are and I just went so eventually, eventually
a groundsman came two hours later and moved it, and
then in the middle of the broadcast we had to
push it back five meters because an ICC official, and
(24:03):
then we had a bit of a to do with
him because we had a creditation that allowed us pitch side.
So when we were commentating, we went through the gates
and we stood behind the boundary behind the songs and
watched the game and a huge fight started there as
Jeremy and Paul weinst they had a massive fight with
an icy SA guy and it started to you. By
that stage, you'd gone home on your own, coord both.
(24:26):
I think that I think the beggst part of that
was when you left to go have some nine eyes
in the middle of the that day. We see clearly
you lived quite close by, so it was fine and
you and you leaned in to grab your phone and
you greenned and you didn't look what phone you were grabbing,
and you just went and you grabbed it, and you
grabbed our O two two one, and you left your
(24:48):
one and your one was going off like like a
frog and a sot and it was messages. It was
the wives ringing over and over and we're like, why
where's our two two one six Sid, We've got your
phone and we've got your ex wife ringing over again.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
On these thoughts, commentated that got banned from a ground, Yeah,
stand out from a ground.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
Yeah, you got markin, got frog batched out in the end,
But the so that culminated that was kind of building.
And then one Yeah, the straw that broke the camel's
back was napier when you jumped on the drinks trolley
with Pittsi who invited us to go on that. Ironically,
it was the one thing we did that we didn't
really want to do, but we were kind of obliged
to because of a sponsor, and it's the one thing
(25:29):
that got U kicked out.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
It was a sponsor's commitment.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
They wanted one of us to go out the gatorade
and a drinks break. Could have been any of us,
but just how it worked and ended up being me
that went out chatting to a couple of players, went
back ICC of course I'm out there match fixing or whatever.
They didn't they knew that it was just it was people.
Just to light the fact that we had that yeah,
(25:53):
access access I suppose it was hilarious because of the
end of that game.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
I mean, been at the airport and I turned my
phone back on and I had probably twenty miss calls
from one number, so ran it's never good. It's never good.
Rang that back and it was Dallas Gurney, who was
a head of sport from News or whatever, the radio network,
but he was in charge of radio sport and in
charge of the rights they had. And he said, first
(26:20):
words he said to me was like, please tell me
you didn't do it. And I was like, what the
guests the commentator's peraneum And he goes, no, okay, well
guess the commentator's milk or the jetsy and he goes no.
I was like, what is it? The are the two
worst things we did today? And he goes, tell me
you didn't steal a drinks trolley, drive it on the
(26:41):
field and interview players live on the field. And I
was like, no, that's actually one thing we didn't do.
We got invited on all that, and he goes he said,
it's too late. He didn't even make finish. He goes,
it's too late that you've been thrown out. They've gone
I mean, I don't want to throw them out of
the bus. But they threw us under the bus. Yeah,
they did.
Speaker 3 (26:57):
We had that meeting the following week. We were asked
to do it officially. We didn't want to do it.
That's the last thing we'd want to That's not the
sort of thing I would do. Or you, Yeah, jump
on there and.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Try to hijack again, hijack again. That's kind of cringey.
Speaker 1 (27:11):
Yeah, we do that.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
We were literally doing an official thing. But obviously in
the media everyone's saying, oh, yeah, typical, Yeah, wacky guys
trying to be cool. And then they said, look, you're
just going to have to take a hit on this
and make out it was you because the SEC is
all over us.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
Yeah, and you're not going to stick up for us.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
And they said no, no, And then the story's got
more water. They got moved into match fixing, it moved
into like talking to the players and arrange because the
couple of players we passed you like, I think it
was a hereage have and gat to and walked on.
Then here was a couple of media who rated us
out as well, who were upset that we were on the
field because they had exclusive on field rights or whatever,
So it's kind of it was a mixture of but
(27:48):
the problem with us, the fact that we had to
actually probably lie down and take it was the litany
of ship that we've done for Yeah, we were happy
to take that. Yeah, because I was right about the.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
Meet before, so much shit on us already that we
were like, we're like, if we do fight this, they're
going to just turn around and just go what about this, this?
Speaker 1 (28:06):
This? And then Yeah, But in the end it was
the best thing that ever happened to us. We couldn't
go to the games because going to the games was great.
It was, so it was banned from all games, so
we were allowed to still broadcast. The negotiation. Negotiation was
we were allowed to still commentate, but we weren't allowed
(28:27):
at the grounds, so we were deemed just to be
disruptive for the grounds. So we had to then go
somewhere at a studio and get a feed and do
it from a studio. So we still covered the games,
but it just wasn't quite the same in the same
atmosphere because been at those games was incredible, like that
they're Eden parks, old ad eating park game. We didn't
get to go to the semi final with the Hairy Jab.
We had to do that from a studio, so it
(28:48):
took it away a little bit, but in the end,
if you look back on it, it.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Was a good thing. As far as awareness.
Speaker 3 (28:53):
We got a lot of publicity, not that we were
looking for that and they certainly weren't, but the everyday
people were reading the articles.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
You know, who are these people? And you know went
international and we are still the first and only commentary
team to be thrown out of a World Cup.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
I'm quite proud of that, and first and only to
have a besect me.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
But we'll talk about that and also how it's morphed
into perhaps right being other.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
Things right after this break. So surely.
Speaker 4 (29:24):
Welcome back to Paige to talk life from the ecological
Thanks to uber one, we've got Mike Clane from the
ACC here obviously acc of the boss. I meet a
Tenure's radio Hdarchy boss as well, which was being the
boss for Leehart for ACC or Hodak you take more
years off your life?
Speaker 1 (29:41):
Wow. There was about a three year period there working
in an ACC and Hodaki were kind of intertwined. I
think potentially it was the beginning of the end of
a couple of marriages. But it was a great mind. Yeah,
I was that year and I'm not sure what's that worth.
Doubt exactly what it's worth. You go to GSD with it. Yeah,
(30:05):
that it was great fun running both and an the end,
one had to take priority out of the other in
terms of my passionalize with sports, so that's why they
kind of had to separate a little bit. And I
left RADIOHDEKI probably three or four years ago.
Speaker 3 (30:18):
And actually you know that the cricket, I mean I
mentioned some I don't know if a highlights and low
lights you've got to reseect me live on.
Speaker 2 (30:25):
I mean that wasn't purely for agents. You needed to
get the zect.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Yeah, I did see me booked in and I just
double booked it on the day that we played Australia
at eating Part. You're not going to miss that, no,
So I just decided to do both.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
You can get someone to fill in.
Speaker 3 (30:38):
You can get someone to fill in for the commentary,
but not for the you know, you've got.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
To have it. Yeah, So that was that was interesting
getting that done because it's an interesting procedure even if
you've had it done. But you father didn't do that, No,
I didn't get it. I wouldn't have trust him down there.
He's more a foury guy rather than tubes guy. But yeah,
that was an interesting afternoon. I felt sorry more for
Joe Jury who had to be on there and film
it with me. But I didn't forget that game. That
(31:03):
was the game that Marcus Thynus nearly nearly beat us in.
At the end, Mett Heath threatened to stomp on Josh
Hazeld's head at the end. It was a very eventful game.
But yeah, I'm always than one.
Speaker 3 (31:18):
Any real low lights, We've covering most of them. The
low lights are highlights. This is the thing.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
There's a mixture of it, yeah, because there's so many
stories of what we got up to. Probably a low
light is because we obviously always trying to like push
push the barrel, push it out a little bit, and
do things that you don't necessarily do, like we spent
We did a whole game on nos once that was interesting,
and when people asked us whether we were really doing it,
(31:43):
We're like, of course not, We're not that stupid, when
really we were that stupid. And then we had a
message one day and we were in a studio and
we had a message saying, Hey, I'm such and such.
I own a strip bar, a strip joint, whatever. We'll
seend someone around and I think we replied sure, didn't
give them an address or anything. And then about an
(32:04):
hour later there was a knock in the window and
there was a girl by the name of Darcy standing
outside the studio, girl by the name of Darsi, girl
by the name of Darcy, who was carrying what can
only be described as a suitcase, a weally bag suitcase.
And I sent Joe jury out and I said, can
you just find out what's going on. There was a Sunday,
so there was no one really else around, and she said, oh,
(32:24):
I've been sent down here apparently to do some shows.
I can do this there and the other. And Joe
just came in and said, you've got to come out
and sort this out. And so I went out and
I went, okay, what can you do? She just like
said some outrageous stuff around flames and balls, and I
was like, okay, well, and I was kind of trying
to think on my feet, and this is one thing
I do regret. This is a low light. I thought,
wouldn't it be funny if at the stage. We were
(32:47):
live streaming the video of the commentary team in the studio.
Wouldn't it be funny if she came in and she
stripped with her back to the camera and everyone on
the team ignored her, And it was actually worked perfectly.
And I said to whatever you do, don't turn around
and don't show any nudity you or stuff, because that's
going to probably get problematic for us. Word of advice,
never trust the strapper, because what happened was she went
(33:11):
and it worn't perfectly because in the air it was
Jason Hoyt, which was perfect, James mcconey and Matt Heath
and they were there were a huge debate around biscuits
and the biscuit eleven and who would be only in
the Batsman? Would it be Tim Tams and ginger Nuts whatever,
and so there was and they did not even give
her the time of day. They completely ignored her. So
it was actually quite funny. But then she obviously got
(33:33):
upset that they were ignoring so she didn't see the
gag in it. So she then climbs up on the desk,
removes her top, starts grinding on the desk like full
nudity and I was like, oh God, oh god, this
is going terribly wrong, and it's all been live streamed out.
My phone's lighting up, and I'm like, oh god God.
I had to ext how extract her off the desk,
(33:54):
extract things that she was using on the desk, which
was sponsored products. So you want to ever want to
see a mammoth mammoth milk bottle be used in an
appropriate way. It was fat, so it was also going
on snaggy jangyhead, so I may just go out of there.
And it just blew up because one of the sponsors
watched it and then got a hold of another sponsor
(34:16):
who got and all the sponsors knew and then obviously
and then it spread like wildfire. We quickly took it down,
tried to delete it, tried to big it ever happened,
And then it got to the CEO. CEO gets a
story that we had strippers in on a Sunday after
lean in the office, and all of a sudden it
became a big thing and I had to do this
big mere culpa and I like, and I just say, like,
it was a misjudgment. I thought I thought it was
(34:37):
going to be a gag. It went horribly wrong, and
it was about a week of me just with personally
ringing people apologizes. So that's home a good story, but
at the time it was terrible.
Speaker 2 (34:48):
And naturally morephen to rumpy and pretty quick. We're just
going now so you know.
Speaker 3 (34:53):
You're coming right of sports now, which is great Rugby
World cover course two thout fifteen.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
Your yes meant went over there. I don't know what
for beastity.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
We were there. We weren't commentating, No, we weren't. Twenty fifteen,
we got an invite from the All Black Tours guys.
They said, can you come and help host the planes?
They chatted two planes, remember the Beaver plane and the
ram Henry plane, the plane the Ted plane, and we
were like sure, I mean there's eight of us, so
he's fine, okay, And they made it. Remember they made
(35:21):
us do some gags on the Oh it's terrible, like
like no one wants to. When you're on a plane
and you start watching a movie, the last thing you
want to hear is someone get on the intercom and
start talking.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Because it stops you movie. Listen to this idiot speak.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
And this is where I learned where Jeremy Wells and
Lee Hart are experienced campaigners because they immediately said to
the guy, will go first. We'll go on the Auckland
to La leg straight away because everyone was fizzing. People
were quite hammered because they've all been drink excited they're
going to the World Cup. So Lee and Jeremy got on,
did a few gags and everyone was laughing bah, and
then they said, also, Matt Heath and Lane, you can
(35:55):
do LA to London. And so we get yeah, and
we get to La. Everyone's was hungover and we get
on the plane and when we said to the guy,
people want to hear from us, like you know, they
just want to want to sleep. He goes, nah, you've
got to you need to talk with baby. Yeah, need
to interview Bever. And we're like, oh no, like you know,
(36:17):
of course give and gets on. Everyone's deep in their movies.
We're wanting to go to sleep, and we're like, get
everyone here, you go. I was like, and then we're
getting abu, like we're getting heckled, like shut out losers.
We're like, oh, set and start. But we spent I
think we were in London for twelve days. We were
there for the semi and the final, but kind.
Speaker 3 (36:37):
Of rudding us as well. We had no there's no
commentary to do. It's just kind of quasi quasi.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Things, you know, we need to do commentary and commentary.
We hosted an event, a couple of like Q and
A events and stuff like that with the punters, but
ninety percent of the time we were idle hands, and
it was not good for idle hands to make bad decisions,
very bad decisions. Little hands end up in Amsterdam, speaking
(37:05):
of which I think you still there is you still
owe me because we give remember chicking out of that hotel.
We're going to go there that you talk about the
you lift it day early to go film some stuff
or hellas I think, yes, yes, And she left me
with the room bell. Now this is a twelve day
room bell.
Speaker 3 (37:23):
But bear in mind it wasn't on me because you yeah, yeah,
and there are other people were putting stuff.
Speaker 1 (37:29):
On our Yeah. The one thing I do remember is
checking out of that hotel each way Hilton, well it's
not a Hilton, and going to the counter and I'm
already full of anxiety and sweating anyway, after twelve days
of terrible behavior, so I'm riddled with no serotone and
nothing go up to the disk, and I said, I
need to clean up the bar tab for room twenty
one sixteen or something, and she's like okay. She goes
(37:54):
and she puts the thing down. I'm like, oh, six
hundred pounds, magnificent. And I put my credit card out
and she's like, sorry, sir, there's six more pages. And
I was like check chick, chick. Oh my god, and
then I've seen I was. I was so dumbfounded there
for a while that they actually took me out the
back into a room where I had to go through
(38:16):
line by line and it started, you don't know, it
started at five thousand pounds. So I had to go
through all the miniatures and say, look, you can go
to our room. We didn't drink the miniatures, which I
can't believe we didn't because I was still on the shelf,
and so all the miniature charges came off. So that
was fifteen hundred pounds wiped off it. So you think
about that, this was three thousand dollars. It's a bonus.
(38:37):
So I'm like, okay, I'm down to three thousand, five
hundred pounds and then I'm looking at it going bucket
of Peroni three thirty. Yeah, that's definitely us two buckets
of Peronis, four buckets, so Pernis. I'm like, I couldn't
argue with the sheer volume of Peronis that were on it.
And then I did, okay, I'll pay this tree and
(38:59):
a half thousand pounds and then and I put my
cart down and to climb, so I just split it
across to credit cards and then I've been then you
seeing me a message scene get as well? What was
the wash up? How was it? Pretty bad? Pretty bad?
(39:21):
It was no good.
Speaker 2 (39:25):
It's all good. Cancer brings it down to it.
Speaker 3 (39:36):
Yeah, you had a bit of a interest, scared a
bit of a episode, I suppose.
Speaker 1 (39:43):
Yeah, talk us to that. Yeah, that was that was interesting.
That was about five years ago. Now try to bring
that up mac ratings. Do you want that? Do you
want me to cry?
Speaker 2 (39:53):
If you could?
Speaker 1 (39:53):
Yeah, if you could, I'll try. So you know, that
was about five years ago. I had a little lump
on my forehead which wasn't and wasn't a mole or anything.
It was just a little lump and I got win
and got it checked out and the GP ah, you've
got a bit of a syst there. I'll get rid
of that, and GPS are pretty keen to get the
scalpel out. So you got there, put a bit of
local and set it around my forehead and start slicing away.
(40:15):
And he's removing it. And I could tell immediately because
he was like, hill have gone on here than I thought,
and he could scrap it around a bit more. Anyway,
he said, I probably should send this way to get tested,
and it kind of the back of my mind, I
was like, I don't think it's nothing. And then a
week later got a positive result for a DFSP, which
the dermo fibrosis so comia pertubian, which is a very
rare and slow growing.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
Some just appears there's no reason to it. No, it's
just completely random, so random.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
In fact, it's a cancer most commonly found an African
American woman on their abdomens, and I was a middle
aged white guy right in the middle of my forehead,
so I had the only way to get rid of
them is by surgery. So you had to get it
surgically removed. So I then went and got a couple
of days of mose surgery, which they take a margin
around here and then they test it to see because
(41:01):
it's basically like a spider, so it's kind of spreads
like that, so you've got tentacles that go off. So
they had to take margins margins. And now after two
days of that, and I was awake during those ones,
that was pretty horrible. And then they said this is
too big. You're going to have to go under a general.
And then I went under a general and I came
back from that general with what can only be described
as a cherry pie on my forehead. They went right
down to my skull, took three mile off my skull
(41:23):
to get rid of it. So I was left with
this John Normals hole in my head. But it's kind
of I don't know how you approach. It's kind of
weird when you get diagnosed or something like that, because
you don't you kind of everything kind of comes into
focus and you kind of don't worry about anything else.
You just worry about getting yourself better, and you go,
what do I need to do? And the doctors you
gotta get rid of it. I said, okay, fine, this
is that's work on that. You get rid of it
(41:46):
and then what's next, Well, next is probably make repairing
the cherry pie. Okay, what to do this skin graft
and what do I have to do now? Well, we
have to make let it heal and then we'll do
it again and do a reconstruction. What do I do now?
So you kind of just you just you can't departmentalize
everything they knew.
Speaker 3 (42:04):
Okay, it's not it's not going to get worse. It's
more of a surgery thing. It was there a time
where you got this could be.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
It was one time because the first time they operated,
they said we got rid of it. And then the
next operation they said, oh, this is a little bit
more that we just need to sort out. And I'm like,
what do you mean you didn't get it? No, I
don't think so. And that's when I was like, oh, okay,
But they did get rid of it because I went
and got a pet skin after that and it was
all gone. So that was fine. But then I had
(42:32):
to go through with the reconstruction of my forehead here,
so I can't move my forehead anymore. It's all because
I've done a pretty good job they have. Well. Famously,
I got the tits put on my head as well.
I got two expansion tissue expanders in here, and then
they flapped it across and covered it up. So it's
all gone now. But it was a hell of a
five years. Yeah, And I had to approach it pretty
(42:53):
straight on because otherwise you are there's two options you got.
You can either feel sorry for yourself, sit at home
and hide away, or you can just front foot it.
I mean to work with these big tits on my
head every.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Day, change your perspective on stuff, and generally little bit
a little.
Speaker 1 (43:07):
I suppose it to change your in terms of your priorities.
I guess was probably the biggest thing in terms of
spending more time with your family and stuff like that
or whatever kind of put into perspective. Because I was
working pretty hard up until that point, Like that was up.
It was kind of just before COVID, we're going pretty
hard with the a SEC. And I suppose once COVID hit,
I got that and everyn kind of slowed down a
(43:27):
little bit. And it can prioritize pretty hard of you.
Speaker 3 (43:31):
If you ask me, just just in wrapping up, then
what's next? Not so much of the a SEC. I
can just see that carrying on, and but how about
you know, and the big picture sort of things like
it's almost like the lunatics taking over the asylum to
a degree. I mean, can you see yourself perhaps moving
into a field perhaps with New Zealand cricket or rugby
(43:55):
that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1 (43:56):
Yeah, yeah, mind, as you say, it's a fans it's
a fans world.
Speaker 2 (44:01):
They need to see it from a fan's perspective.
Speaker 3 (44:03):
So should some of these entities us on rugby, cricket,
et cetera, perhaps be bringing on people who see it
from a fans perspective.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
Yeah, I've thought about that actually, and that is in
terms of we we treat of it. Do treat up
in fans terribly here for whatever reason, And that's all
it is about, is fancy entertainment. That's what it is. Yeah,
And I really I'm really kind of envious of America
and envious a little bit of even Australia a little
bit about their fan experience and what they do, because
I think, for ages, the fan experience in New Zealander
(44:35):
get a DJ in the ground and play loud music
and then get some boomsticks and some tinsel wigs and
you know, tick the box. But it's it's a bit
deeper than that. So yeah, I mean, look, that's probably
why I will go, you're right, because at some stage
I'm going to be completely irrelevant and the stuff we
do is going to be irrelevant.
Speaker 2 (44:51):
Well, I don't think so. I think it's is relevant.
That's the point. It's all.
Speaker 3 (44:55):
It's a learning, it's a training ground for for that,
for that next job, so that you know, we've got
to be able to give them the best here as
an entertainment package.
Speaker 1 (45:05):
Totally. Yeah, it's gonna be Yeah, it's gonna be interesting.
Kind of next ten years, the ACC will kind of well,
we'll bubble away. We'll kind of keep innovating and keep
doing new stuff. Obviously, the podcast Realm has been good
obviously getting into more YouTube and video along with the
commentary as well. How we can reinvent that channels changing
platform every day is a platforms changing so you just
(45:25):
got adapt with Yeah, totally. You just gotta roll the
punches and digital. It's pretty good because you can fail
super fast. You just turn it off. People aren't watching
or listening. You just stop, whereas's hard to do in
that mainstream because you're so invested. You have to make
it work.
Speaker 2 (45:37):
Well, I'm sure they're still listening to this. On that note,
we'll live there, I got.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
Can I stay the night in the cological of course? Yeah,
just keeck on.
Speaker 2 (45:47):
Now you're back to twenty third and I can't do
that one you did.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
You could do the tween you said, you said all
t twenties you could do. Okay, well it
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