Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Live for the Export Beer Gaddin Studio and brought to you,
as always by Export Ultra the beer for Here. This
is the Agenda Podcast for Tuesday, the nineteenth of No
Remember The.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Agenda Podcast, the home of Sporting nonsense and clap Trap,
brought to you by Export A vulture.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
In a very heavy Tuesday to j Lane.
Speaker 4 (00:18):
Oh, great to be here. Great to be here on
a Tuesday.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
It feels like summer today, it does.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
I've come. I've got the dogs out. Yeah, you do
the dog the dogs out. I got the shorts, I
got the birkenstocks on.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (00:29):
It had a vibe to it. This morning I caught
the faerry to work. It was glassy, it was there
was not a cloud in the sky. I almost felt
like crashing a beer on the ferry. But they don't
serve before ten. Uh, it's disappointing.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
But I mean, how why do they not serve before ten?
How slosh could you possibly get on a half hour?
Speaker 4 (00:48):
I'm not sure. It's just a good look. And when
I was a youngster on this is another store on
the Devonport Firry when they used to have the Kia.
If you've been to Auckland, the Kia was this kind
of fairy that had two fronts and it just go
backwards and forwards, so I wouldn't have to reverse or
come out. And it was quite slow, and it had
a bar at the top. And when I used to
live over and Devin Purt in my twenties, mahyday at
(01:10):
least to have a competition about how many beers you
could drink between and the ferry. And it was only
fifteen minutes. But you've got to get up to the
bar straight away, order the beer while it's still boarding,
and then you only you biffit so you could turn
around and you have two big gulps, put it in
the recycle bin, order two more, try and neck as
much as that one, then back to your table. And
I think.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Four was we've got four and right four is about
part Yeah. Yeah for all competitive junger. You want to
you want to have one down before boarding's finished, yes, yeah,
before it leaves the dock.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
You've got to be at least one down, and then
you've got another fifteen minutes to climb through three. But
you've got to do it without being spotted by the
bar manager.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
So you're going to want a busy commute so that
other people are hiding as you were up to.
Speaker 4 (01:50):
Correct and then then lining up. Usually it's a Friday
afternoon is when things get a bit funky. And we
also used to use the Kere as a speed dating
scene because on a day night we would sit up
in the bar and it would go from Dimport to
Auckland and we're just try and meet people up in
the bar rough stairs. Yeah and yeah what he goes
up to tonight? We hit it and then if we
didn't get any bites, we'd just stay on the fury
(02:12):
and come back to Devenport and wait for new and
wait for a new load. And me and my mate
Ramma Ramma Lama Dingong, we used to sit out the
top of that theory and go back to some forwards
until someone was dumb enough to tell us where they're
going and asking us if we wanted to come hell you,
we'll go to Degree with you, or we'll go to
(02:33):
Provadore or some other ship hole and.
Speaker 3 (02:37):
This is grotten.
Speaker 4 (02:41):
Likely Hawk and Rat went with us, which my other
mates is I remember we did. Actually someone introduced us
as that a girl. What is this is a fucking
zoo We're like, okay, this is not going to go well.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Just picture you guys because the naval bases over there.
Yeah yeah, you never close your eyes.
Speaker 4 (03:02):
And we had may in the navy too old. You've
last loan we needed was a piano up there on
from the top of the kere to show.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Oh, grot and ram on the Divenport Express.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
We never pulled, not fucking once.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Because everyone is going somewhere.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Ah fuck, it was us well useless.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Where I kiss.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
I don't think that's ever works. Then Gas tried that
at the Sail and Anchor and too didn't work in it. Hey,
Becky Cricket, we're talking about summer. It feels like it's here.
Everyone's going to be playing by C this summer, and
we at the A C C have finally done something
about it for you. We're bringing out our own classic
range of BYC equipment.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Here.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
We are finally here, the ACC B YC range.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
Yeah, we've partnered with Rebel Sport and Silver Fern Sports
and we're bringing out We've got a whole range. So
first of all, we've got the straight up plastic Kiwi
cricket set, your yellow plastic, yellow plastic cricket set. And
the thing with that is everyone must have one and
for that we're got a bit of a charity angle
on that and the fact that every set you buy,
(04:27):
one gets donated to charity. So I mean, no one's
making any money off this to trust me. See, you
buy one of those sets and we gift one to
charity and it gets distributed by the Tanya Dalton Foundation
and another charity to schools and communities. So that's the
first one. It's just the straight up set. However, we've
introduced something I wouldn't say controversial, but I think it's
(04:48):
going to be popular.
Speaker 1 (04:49):
It is going to tear families apart in the backyard
this season. What it would say is six and out
needs to be mandatory for all backyard crickets games around
the country this summer. We've we've released the punisher.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
It's a it's a cricket. It's a backyard cricket bat,
a plastic mold. It's hollow, but it is the size
of a David Warner Cuoko bar T twenty bat.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
Is I'd say, I don't know, fifteen to twenty centimeters thick,
and it's it's a point. It is a weapon and
when you just when you time it just in a block,
it full lies. Yes. So if you roll out into
the backyard with the punisher this summer, people will laugh.
They'll laugh. They only laugh once.
Speaker 3 (05:30):
Yeah, they'll laugh until they cry.
Speaker 4 (05:31):
Yeah, and then you pump them into the subcanopy and
then they won't be laughing.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Everyone that bays one should get like a letter that
they can hand out to their neighbors. Hey, just so
you know, I've got the a SEC's punisher, So tape
your windows up because I'm going for it.
Speaker 4 (05:46):
Yeah, we'll get a video up with the punisher. It's one.
It's it's almost a comedy batah, but it's almost almost.
It is a comedy bat But go into your rebel
sport and check it out. The whole backyard cricket range.
So there's there's wooden sets, there's a little and the
mini punisher. So you can get the little ones, but
the big punisher is the one you want. Range of balls.
We've got the swing ball pre taped for you. We've
(06:08):
got the training ball. We've got the kind of semi
hard ball that will kind of if you get on
the front prawn and it hits you in the shep
it's going to hurt. Yeah, I've got the soft plastic
one that's probably ideal for just pinning young young nephews
and nieces.
Speaker 3 (06:20):
There's the one with the actual sem on it.
Speaker 4 (06:21):
Yeah, there's a harder one for kind of an open
wicket situation. And they're good and they've got instructions on
all of them of what the balls do. And yes,
exclusive to Rebel Sport. Ideal stocking stuffers.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
Yeah, three pack of balls with the swing ball and
the soft ball.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Yeah, so hit into Rebel Sport, have a go.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
And then yeah, like you said, for everyone that you buy,
another one will be donated. Yeah, you have to have
every New Zealander has to have a cricket a plastic
backyard cricket set.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
Yeah, you do. And when they get totaled as well,
so you've got to replace them. The text sport to
three two three six. You'll get a to rent link
to a link to all the kit and check it out,
especially the the punisher is I'm pecking. It's going to
sell out. I would get there quick with the punisher.
That's going to be the hottest item you'll ever see.
You roll, you roll into a music festival. If you're
(07:12):
camping and you've got the punisher.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
Oh my god, it's the first.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
That's the only beat I would consider taking around to
someone else's house showing up with their own backyard cricket
bat as a power move when you've got the punisher.
It would make so much sense. Everyone would be like, oh,
I get it. Yeah, old uncle Lane's shut up with
his own bat to Christmas, and you need to pull
it out of a bag as well.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
It needs to be you need to turn it into
a ceremony.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Anyway, so yeah, sport two three two three six to
check that out, and yeah, just go into it now
and then that's all You're Christmas shopping done.
Speaker 4 (07:42):
For the year. And that you've got the acc book.
Look out for the Black Friday special coming up for
that because it's going to be a ripper and I
think that would probably do two or three people.
Speaker 1 (07:52):
After Yeah, after the Golden State Warriors cleaned us out
of hats, we just received a new ship this morning.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
Just come in, so we've got hats and law as well.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Yeah, easy, just quickly before we take a break. The
World Rugby Award nominations have come out and we're going
to go through this quickly because we have not been
nominated for many We didn't get one in the World
Rugby Men's Fifteens Player of the Year. Would you put
in there though? Who would you have put forward? Or
this is the thing, So this covers the World Cup
last year?
Speaker 4 (08:20):
Does it? Yes? I presume so?
Speaker 3 (08:23):
Or would last year? Is one have mopped that up?
Speaker 4 (08:25):
I guess this is two twenty twenty four?
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Yeah, so yeah, only.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
This year actually, so yeah, you're right.
Speaker 3 (08:32):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Maybe Ardie Savi here, but they've got Caitlin Doris, the
Irish fella even it's a Peter Stiff to toy and
Chislin Cobby, which makes me think that it covers the
World Cup. World Cup. Yeah, those guys were outstanding.
Speaker 4 (08:46):
No Doon.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
He was nominated for the Sevens Player of the Year,
which I think he's one hands down either.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
He was outstanding in the.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Sevens campaign at the Olympics. Mikayla Blyd and Georgia Miller
both normally noted for the sevens as well. We did
get him in in the men's fifteens Breakthrough Player of
the Year. Wallace citt Ah side Teddy Well. It must
just be this year then, yeah, it must be just
this year. But I just looked at his and I
don't know who Jamie Osborne.
Speaker 4 (09:14):
Never heard of him, but I see Emanuel also he
had a pretty outstanding year. Was that his first year
of international rugby? Think it? I think it was? Yeah, okay,
it was excellent. Side Teddy might be up against X
I think we're both so may take that out.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Yeah, and such a fine Berg and Gormezulu from the
Republic of South Africa.
Speaker 4 (09:33):
I couldn't name you who that was it? One of
the bombs squads.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
I thought Sasha Feinberg was an actor or some sort.
I think in a Sasha Baron car. Yeah, I don't
know anyway, So those are the awards I think. I
think well of the tit would be up there. I mean,
when those Welsh guys accosted us in Amsterdam, all they
wanted to talk.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
About was what was t T is a good rugby player?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
If I am and lost the X yeah, always have
edged some or a gripping game at eight mil.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
And I love how people commented as a commentators are
saying a good, good game because it didn't blow out
too much. Are they expecting a twenty nil or an.
Speaker 1 (10:11):
I mean it was three at half time, so you know,
I feel like I don't think they left anything out there.
Speaker 4 (10:16):
So they say, all whites, this is our path to
facall World Cup in America, Canada and Mexico. Is we've
got Fiji next, yeah, yeah, or Tahiti or.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
So who do you think wins that? Tahiti or two.
I don't know, Tahiti.
Speaker 4 (10:33):
I think yeah, the verbositi Tahiti will probably win that.
I imagine it's I think a bit more Frenchies than
Tahiti who they got Dave, Yeah, Dave goes hard to
be fair, but you've got to say that is a
(10:58):
pretty good path to the Fifth Cup for the because
at the time it was easier in Asia than it
was coming through Oceania in South America because they limped
us into South America and they're like, I've playing Columbia
or Mexico every time to qualify, and they went, we're
back ourselves to beat because in Asia is the Middle
(11:19):
East as well, so that you know, you've got the
Bahrains and the Saudis and stuff. So the Australians are
like and I think from the Asia group, I think
the top four go through, so you've got to so
you can come forth and still go through, whereas Oceana
you've got to win and then you play the fifth
place South American team, which is usually a weapon of
a team because they're so good at football.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Right, So what so if we win this whole thing,
then do we still have to play South America Australia?
Speaker 4 (11:44):
This is? This is They've changed it. So we automatic
qualification from Oceania. Hell yeah, and we will be at
the FIFA World Cup again in America as well, Canada,
Mexico and the stadiums they're playing at mean.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
College football stadiums, yeah yeah, and some.
Speaker 4 (12:01):
Mean cities as well. So target that if you had
been to a FEEFA World Cup, it's I went to
one in Germany, is mean. Yeah, you'll never experience anything
like it.
Speaker 3 (12:11):
I am.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
So we don't have to play the Middle East and
team Okay, good, none of man.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
I'm surprised.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
I've seen some football pitchers in the Middle East that
would shock and appolla. They are like on rock beds
with just two goals set up at each end. Yeah,
I've never seen anyone playing on them, but I was like, jeez,
imagine the kids.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
That is that's through Oman Yeah yeah, yeah, that's just.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Like it's like Central Otago, just on a bit of shift. Yeah,
it's just imagine the old body dry waddy beds. They
just set a couple of posts, go for it.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
That truly is the global game.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
A hat trick to New Zealand's greatest ever athletic Chris Woods.
He scored three of the best last night as well.
A go hard stadium, So oh what's advanced? And one
step closer to the Rugby World Cup? I have the
Football World Cup. I have come across a startling fact
that will shock you to your core, and it regards
(13:05):
cricket and music.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
And I will regale you with this.
Speaker 4 (13:10):
No, no, okay, maybe no, we're right back.
Speaker 1 (13:17):
The White Stripes album Elephant, Yes, I'm familiar with it.
It came out in two thousand and three, is the
one that had seven Nation Army on it.
Speaker 3 (13:25):
It's sold.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
One of the all time sports chants as well, and
chants the affairs chance, Oh yeah, yes too, and one
of the first songs that you learned on guitar.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
Yeah, you pick up a guitar. It came out in
two thousand and three.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
It sold four million copies worldwide and the cover, fun fact,
had a cricket bat on it. I did not know
that until I heard about it this morning, so I
went and had a look at it. Sure enough, there's
Jack White sitting on a cricket bat on a thing
holding a cricket bat. John Baker was a Kiwi bloke.
He was the tour manager for the White Stripes and
(13:59):
he'd been playing beach cricket during the summer holidays as
everyone's about too with the acc bice with one of
his cousins, and then he ended up taking the bat.
It was a kooka burrough I think it was kooka
borrough Fisher or something.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
This in two thousand and three, remember, he.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
Took the bat with him back to Detroit, but ended
up with him in the studio with Jack White. Jack
White found the bat and put it on the cover
of the album to symbolize an elephant tusk. The way
he's sitting, he's holding it and it looks like an
elephant tusk.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
The cousin that John Baker was playing with was none
other than Kane Williamson.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
Caine.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Williamson's bat is on the cover of the White Stripe's
most successful album, Elephant.
Speaker 4 (14:41):
That is the most bizarre kind of degrees of separation.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
It's like, when we first heard about it, we were like,
that's not true that it wasn't on Kan Williamson's Bat
wouldn't have been on there. First of all, two thousand and three,
how old would Caane Williamson had been about ten twelve?
Speaker 4 (14:57):
Yeah, he was very young.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Yeah, And so yeah, it turns out there's a Kiwi connection.
The tour manager back in the day, John Baker, he
had it. He just happened to leave it in the studio.
It ends up on the cover of one of the
most successful rock albums of all time, and it is
Kane Williamson's bat.
Speaker 4 (15:13):
How's that for a bit of trivia. That's a great
pub fact. Yes, it's a great pub fact to just
blow you and then everyone will get on their phones.
Speaker 3 (15:21):
But no, it's not. Yeah, that's exactly what we did
this morning.
Speaker 4 (15:23):
Something fucking kids do to me at home. I get
fact check every time, and most of my facts are
completely made up. Yeah, hey, Siri, I'm like, fuck Surry. Yeah, yeah,
but that one will check out. That one will check out,
because that's exactly what we did this morning.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
We heard this. It may or may not pop up
in a promotion we're running across.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
Summer that fact. So you got you got to hit start.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
You've got a hit start now if you've listened to
this podcast. So we were checking through that and then
we saw this fact. We look, it wasn't on. It
was never Cain. When Cain Williamson's bat have been on
a fucking album cover? Sure enough Elephant two thousand and three,
four million copies. Kane Williamson's bat is the tusk and
the elephant ridiculous. Speaking of Kan Williamson and that, for
(16:05):
those of you young broadcasters out there, is known as
a segway. He has been interviewed off the back of
Tim Southey's announcement that he's going to retire, and Kane
Williamson said, yeah, look, I'm probably closer to the end
of my career than to the start.
Speaker 4 (16:18):
He was about four years ago.
Speaker 3 (16:20):
Yes, that's right, he is getting he is getting older.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
But when I just wanted to jump away ahead of
ourselves here, when he does retire, where does he is
he on the Mount rushmore of batsman?
Speaker 4 (16:33):
He is New Zealand's best batsman statistically he is, so
he will he would be the first head carved. I
know that everyone's got a bit of white on for
Martin Crow and yes, yes, potentially if Martin Crow played
as much to his cricket as can Williamson, I'm sure.
But he is the first head you carve.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
When you carve the other So he's in there?
Speaker 3 (16:54):
Are you putting Martin?
Speaker 4 (16:55):
And Martin craw has to be in there? I think
Ross Taylor.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Ross Taylor has to be in there because when you
look up the total amount of international runs, he's right
at the top there. Yeah, it's goored more than anyone else.
Then it gets a bit squirrely. I think does Stephen
Fleming go in there in the fourth spot?
Speaker 4 (17:12):
I think you've got to look, there's going to be
some people that are going to look back into the
kind of fifties and sixties kind of and say that, look,
these players over just as talented, just didn't have the opportunities,
whereas this current generation plays so much. We're compared to them,
not as much as England in Australian India pay a
lot more. So they'll be like, I'm trying to think
(17:33):
of some old school, some old school the people are going,
you can't forget this guy and this guy. But in
my head and in my experience and my heart goes,
it goes Williamson, Taylor Crow and then got no, No,
(17:55):
I mean, look, oh shit, are we doing all formats?
I was just thinking tests. I was just thinking tests.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
If we just go tests, then yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:02):
Yeah, okay, and then I'm probably I'm probably putting I'm
probably putting Fleming in there. Yes, I mean his Cricket
Bears was great, but I you know, three hundred. But
if we go for entertainment all forms you go Gapital Bears, Yeah,
a steal and Chris Key, Roger two. Yeah, you know
(18:25):
what I mean. Like in terms of Roger too. Yeah,
there's gonna be some naughties. It's probably a question you
should you should pose to the b YC podcast. Yes,
because I'd say Dylan Cleaver and full Forward would go
balls deep in this, yes, and argue about it and
get quite a lot of correspondence that doesn't involve Fox
South Canterbury. Yes.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
Well, we've done the exact same thing. So last week,
after Tim Southey said that he was retiring, and again
for those few young broadcasters out there, this is another segue.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
We were talking about.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
The Rushmore of Bolus when we heard that he was retiring,
and so we put that out on social media and
there's been some great suggestions.
Speaker 3 (19:00):
We missed a lot of bowlers out there.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
Like, yeah, okay, go for it. Help me.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Richard the Groin, I love the grown Robert Kennedy, brook Walker,
Mark Heslam. What is Mark Heslin bowl?
Speaker 4 (19:12):
He spins a spin bowler, Murphy Sawer, he has.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
Got a lot, a lot, a lot of.
Speaker 4 (19:19):
The Rushmore was just for the what category are we
looking at?
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Rushmore of New Zealand bowl?
Speaker 4 (19:25):
Okay, so there's a lot of irony flowing through here.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Murphy saw Seth Runce. Someone here has come through Headley
Chatfield for.
Speaker 4 (19:33):
Tory Bond I Chatfield. I love Chatfield, but he's not
one of our greatest bowlers. He was a he was
a great player, a great servant, and you'd have to
say great partner and crime with Headley. But I don't
have your beer on a Rushmore.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Because if Headley wasn't as good as Headley was, would
Chatfield have been perceived to be that good?
Speaker 3 (19:54):
You know what I mean? Yeah, Like if he's just
out there by himself plugging away.
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Yeah, I don't know. I don't think because you think
Headley and Chatfield and Bond. You can't leave Southdi's on them,
Brush Moore, Headley's on there for Tories on there. I
guess the next one, is it Bolt or is it Bond?
I'd have to say Bolt because Bond didn't quite get
a crack in the rest of his career.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
Well, and this is the other age old debate about
the Mount Rushmore. Is it longevity or is it apex
because ab you would probably say Bond, I say, at
the height of his power, because he was tearing up
that awesome Australian team when they were you know, the
big swinging dicks of world cricket. He was ripping them
to bits. But it didn't last. So would you rather
(20:36):
have the wildest, you know, minute and a half of
your life or would you rather go all right?
Speaker 4 (20:41):
Well, then we look at the fucking manor express see,
because he's bowling quicker than Bond. Yeah, and when he's
on fire doing hat tricks. Scoring a hat trick got
some suggestions. More suggestions came through Michael Mason. I couldn't
point Michael Mason out of a lineup. He's got a
big great I think you recognize it. It looks like
(21:01):
an Easter Island Stead Brent Arnell, Jesus. And then someone
said the Mount Rushmore of Enzi Cricket party. It's Chris
Pringle in brackets, Bear, Jesse Ryder, Shot, Ken Rutherford Wine,
Dion Nash, South African chronic. Well you've left the latest
one off. Yes, that's right, because I think you could
probably replace Ken Rutherford Wine. I mean, look, you've got
(21:22):
Jeff Howard gin as well, and he would be up there.
He not really known for his gin.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
There's a lot in there, and there's there is the
most recent addition to that potential Mount Rushmore as well.
By the way, kids, this is a masterclass of Seaguays.
Former Black Cats bowler Doug Bracewell has been handed they'll
study this in RADIOSCA has been handed a one month
band from cricket for having been found to have used cocaine.
Bracewell tested positive for cocaine and its metabolite benzole after
(21:53):
a supersmash domestic teach when you match between the Stags
and the Firebirds in January, it was accepted he had
used cocaine out of competition and for reasons unrelated to
sports performance. They shit, according to a statement from the
Sport Integrity Commission or sick.
Speaker 4 (22:08):
So he so you got a one month ban. You
got that taken down from three months because he went
to rehab or went to a counseling session, whatever, and
he served it in April. Not a lot of cricket
going on in April. Also, this is a lesson lady
and gentlemen, because this is it's now November. This will
(22:28):
happen in January. He was suspended in April and it's
now come out and this is a lesson people and
pay your bills, okay, because what's happened here is New
Zealand Cricket have lapsed on their whitewash investigations retainer. And
what a whitewash do to send a.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Message, They release it.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
They release it because obviously whitewash had come along here
and they had done extremely well to keep this quiet
for up to seven months eight months, that's right, and
no one knew about it, and no one was going
to know about it until that automatic payment didn't come
through on the fifteenth of October and whitewasher like, you
can't do that shit.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
For anyone who's unfamiliar with white washed investigations, these are
the guys who managed to sweep almost every major sporting
scandal under the rug ye most notably known for their
work around the Hawk's Bay, winning the Ronfailly Shield. Yes,
and you made a good point before about Bracewell and
the team he plays for Central Districts, which covers Hawk's Bay.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
M See now we're talking. Now we're doing conspiracies. Where
was Dougie when Hawk's Bay? We're looking after the shield?
Speaker 3 (23:35):
That's right?
Speaker 4 (23:35):
Was he responsible for some of that reason?
Speaker 3 (23:37):
That's right?
Speaker 1 (23:38):
And if he was, do we need to go and
test the samples again? So this is what happens. This
is what I keep saying. This is a subscription service
whitewashed investigations. It's not a one time payment and everything
goes away because they still have the dirt on you.
Speaker 4 (23:53):
Yeah. Absolutely, And then and they have got the biggest
arsenal takedowns ever. So once once you're in, you're in.
You're stuck with them. That's the brilliant business model of whitewash. Yes,
I've got so much on everybody. Yeah, that at any
one time they can take down an entire team, an
entire organization.
Speaker 3 (24:09):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
And one payment's not sweet because they've still got all
the digital copies of all of the evidence for everything
you've ever done. So this is a subscription service, and
the subscription gets heavier and heavier, and the consequence is
a dire And this is this must have been the
first missed payment.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Yeah, because this one was relatively minor.
Speaker 4 (24:25):
Yeah. Absolutely, They've probably got so much more. Yeah, so
so much more, and they've like this is a this
is a shot across the bow to New Zealand Cricket
to say start that ap.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
Back app or more will flow. Chris Kens gets it again.
Speaker 4 (24:36):
Yeah, we release his bank statements, not than anything went
through the bank. It was mainly cash, okay allegedly yeah, allegedly.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
So I'm looking forward to seeing Daty Bracewell and the
Big Match supersmash this this summer.
Speaker 4 (24:51):
There's been some good sledging that's going to go on there.
Surely there'll be little baggies thrown onto the good link. Definitely,
they just just the link here and to someone just
drop an empty little baggie on.
Speaker 1 (24:59):
This sniffing around short of the line line. All right,
let's take a quick break. When we come back.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Yours please, yours please, brought you by Leader home of the.
Speaker 1 (25:13):
Whole host of voicemails to get through today. So we
hit the phone lines. Now call it yours please.
Speaker 5 (25:19):
Yeah. I once shot myself on a bus from Glasgow
out into the country. But the bus head the entire
wedding party and I was seated next.
Speaker 6 (25:31):
To the groom.
Speaker 5 (25:32):
So yeah, I had to.
Speaker 4 (25:33):
I had to.
Speaker 5 (25:36):
I had to sit on my own feces for an
hour and a half until we got there.
Speaker 6 (25:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (25:41):
It was fucking grum.
Speaker 5 (25:43):
A real low moment, that one.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
Oh that does sound low. Yeah that sounds low because
I can imagine he where a stunk as well.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
Oh well they're shut himself on the bus. Yeah, I
reckon he might have.
Speaker 4 (25:54):
Surely the groom's like you just oh myself.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
This is what I was saying about that woman who
shot herself while she was running the trithle or whatever
she was doing. If I shipped myself, there's the end
of my day. I'm not carrying on. Like what did
that guy though? Did he clean himself up and then
go to the wedding. I presume they were going well.
Speaker 4 (26:12):
He sounds like it because obviously the glove the winning
was in Glasgow in the after match was an hour
and a half out. Yeah, because he had the whole
wedding party on the bus. Yeah that's uncomfortable. Hour and
a half.
Speaker 3 (26:21):
That's long time and then no respite once you get
to wherever you go.
Speaker 4 (26:25):
I commission it would have dried up, but he would
have had to proper clean up.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
And I think we kind of glossed over it, or
we were in Munich, but one of the guys shipped themselves.
Speaker 3 (26:32):
Well, yeah, we did just gloss over the top of it.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
Yeah, it fell He fell out a bit of an accident,
but he was a bit sick. He did say it
was struggling a little bit with his bows.
Speaker 3 (26:42):
Yeah, he was doing well to even be there.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
But we made jokes before that about she wouldn't want
to shit yourself and a leader, who's it?
Speaker 3 (26:48):
Because how do you wash it?
Speaker 4 (26:49):
He too, Yeah, he found out a way. He took
it to the laundromat.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Fellow to you.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
Yeah, you know what, in hindsight, that's why when I
took my clothes to the laundromat that woman goes mum,
mumy yeah, because she just said fell.
Speaker 3 (27:00):
The night before. It's like a fucking another one of
these guys.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
Thank you very much for sharing that, and I hope
that that's lifted a little bit of a weight off
your chest for sharing that. This might be the first
time anyone's found out about that.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Another call here yours.
Speaker 5 (27:14):
Please boys game.
Speaker 3 (27:24):
Concussion and motivated.
Speaker 4 (27:30):
How good is that? How good is the sound effects
of a V eight? Who someone they must have been
an adelade or something. I think the V eight's are on.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Potentially you're asking the wrong person, But it was an
interesting point that he raised that one of the bucks
had to be removed for a concussion. I don't know
how you get a concussion in the car, but I
do crashing.
Speaker 4 (27:47):
Into the wall. That's probably you probably suffer the worst
concussion in a motor vehicle. You don't really want to
be driving concuss because you get a bit I mean,
you've bet a blue v a bit of perception issues.
Speaker 1 (28:02):
I had a friend who got a concussion at Nipple
one day. She was trying to drive men who were
going back home and she just took the wrong exit
off the motor and Wellington ended up in fucking Upper
Hut and she was like, I thought this was where
we were supposed to go.
Speaker 4 (28:15):
So what get out of the car.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
Yeah, give me the kids so I can completely understand
why you wouldn't want to drive can causs.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
But I appreciate the plane access.
Speaker 4 (28:26):
Yeah, I think that's in terms of Yours Pleases, that's
the best atmosphere at Yours Please. We've had. We've had a.
Speaker 1 (28:31):
Couple of dudes like in the toilets at the stadium
while the keyis are playing things like that, But no,
that was the best. That's just the kind of access
you get here on the Agenda podcast. Another caller here,
we go back to the phones, Yours Please.
Speaker 6 (28:43):
Hey, fellas a bit of.
Speaker 7 (28:45):
A conspiracy theory here, Manaya, I'm getting a lot of
advertisements for the White Taki district. I know it's geolocation,
but on your podcast it's just full of advertisements for
the White Taki district.
Speaker 5 (28:59):
Are you?
Speaker 7 (29:00):
Is this some sort of thing about getting anti South
Cannabury anyway, Fuck South Canabury.
Speaker 4 (29:07):
That'd be quite good from you, actually, if you put
together your own geo targeted podcast campaign, just make everyone
hate northo target. Yeah, and that's a good that's a
you know, any potential advertisers out there, that's what we
can do. Yeah, with this podcast here, we can hyper
target regionally, we can geo target, so you know, get
in touch.
Speaker 3 (29:26):
Absolutely, we can.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
We know so much about you listening that it's scary
the amount of targeting we can do. We can target,
you know, main household grocery shoppers, we can target, you know,
thirty five year old single mothers. We can target, can
we men who bat your left handed and bowl right handed?
Speaker 4 (29:43):
Go back to the single mother's one? How do you
do that?
Speaker 3 (29:45):
After the show? But what air are you going to
put together? Amen?
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Rammer a bit at the top of that, I'll bring
Radon Hawk ratten Hork going to be out the top
of the Old Express to Devonport on Friday afternoon. If
any thirty five year old single mothers again, No, I
would just like to remind that call a couple of points.
First of all, if I can hate North Otago, so no,
I'm not trying to advertise for them. And second of all,
(30:11):
the targeted to you, not to us, So it's more
of a reflection of you. And if you are in
North Otago. Just bear in mind you can always leave.
There are brighter days ahead.
Speaker 3 (30:22):
You could go.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Literally anywhere and it'd have been improvement except for mid Canterbury.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
Another caller here yours please.
Speaker 6 (30:28):
Good lad's hoping you can point me in the direction
of the reimbursement form on the ACC website. Was listening
to the podcast on Thursday Friday and Glane was making
a lot of sense about Mike Carson knocking Jake Paul
Out followed him in on that one quite heavily, and
it's not going to be a good week. I'm on
the two minute noodles. Let's put it that way, being responsive,
(30:48):
responsible expensively. But yeah, I just sort of fluck it
through and you guys can improve that and put the
money back in my account.
Speaker 4 (30:54):
Anyway, no problem, got great pipes there, guy. Look there
there is a complaints form. It's not so much a
refund form, but you can put your complaints together and
send them to Private Bag ninety one nine eight Auckland.
We'll deal with it how we please. We don't uph
hold any of the complaints. But look, I mean I
(31:15):
followed myself in on that one. I just wanted a
one part. It was actually my it was my heart
thinking with that one. But yaes, I hated Jake Paul
so much.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Yeah, that's what you want to see and then what
you think will happen. Yeah, that's how I thought it.
I put five dollars on the gone in sixty seconds, yeah,
one which was paying twenty six bucks, and then I
put the house on Jake Paul by decision.
Speaker 4 (31:38):
Ye as soon as I saw Tyson walk out with
those chicken legs drop over.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
Oh god, a couple of squats.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
Yeah, mine, all right, another call here, you're suppose.
Speaker 6 (31:48):
Get I read bags.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
Just following on from Mitchell sent they're having a new nickname.
I think Father.
Speaker 3 (31:54):
Christmas was it. Yeah.
Speaker 8 (31:56):
I was wondering if we could help withstra out and
do so and work with poor Rifle. Change it from
the pistol pathetic Australia pathetic.
Speaker 6 (32:06):
Maybe usual Lee Harvey Oswill when he's uptears in the box,
the third umpire of the cricket.
Speaker 4 (32:12):
See yeah, so as he suggesting, we renamed poor Rifle
Lee Harvey Oswald.
Speaker 3 (32:18):
He's umpire right, yeah poor right yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (32:20):
His nickname was pistole, but he's but obviously he was
up and there he was he did us as solid
in those test matches. He really was hating on the
Indian team.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
But as he should have totally.
Speaker 5 (32:31):
So.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
He Texas Books repository Lee Harvey Oswald, Yeah, Lee Harvey
Osword like it and that's great question without warning. But
hopefully he's over here unboring some of our games.
Speaker 4 (32:44):
Yeah, that would be good. He's a good umpire in Yeah,
big unit.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
All right, one last caller here.
Speaker 4 (32:51):
Yours Hi Julane.
Speaker 8 (32:57):
Big of the day against Park there was just two
students in a cow suit being led round by another student.
They were Mulu could get a few students shut them
in a camel suit for the sixth Camel Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (33:17):
I thought that was going somewhere else actually, because I
was thinking about my days back back in White going
to Whiteado games, and I was like, oh god, where's
this going? With two men in a suit we lead around?
I'm like, what did I do?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
Teenager? I sold a cover of pers to.
Speaker 4 (33:36):
A four pack of They got their money with. That's
not a bad idea. It's we're going to fight. I
mean I must have met the whole the cow suit.
You probably find one of those. You go to first
scene and find a two man cows would have a
camel suit. It's true. It's dangerously uncomfortable being the back end.
(33:58):
The front end is fine because you're standing up, you're
getting all the all the love and yeah, in the
back end you've got to be hunched over. You gotta
be like all o Brown. You've got to straighten the back. Yeah,
maybe we can ask what's the vow up to just
get him to pop pop into it like a yeah,
perfect straight back.
Speaker 1 (34:15):
He's punishing me on a sky TV at the moment,
is what he's doing. Yeah, yeah, Okay, Well I'll hit
Gus up and see if he's happy to be.
Speaker 3 (34:22):
Would he fit in the back end of a camel?
Speaker 4 (34:24):
Yeah, I don't know. Like, like, our quest for the
camel continues, so even if it is a costume, it's
a costume. I don't mind.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
I'd like to just apologize. I've just realized I've massively
dropped the ball on this. I work with, I mean,
I live with someone who's in the in the zoo,
in the zoo industry here in New Zealand, and if
anyone would know if there's a camel in New Zealand,
she would And I've forgot to ask it.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
I haven't asked it.
Speaker 4 (34:46):
How do they travel? I know they travel well across
the visits by caravan. You're right, what do you mean, like, like,
how would you get one to Yeah? Could we just
get a horse float and have one on the back.
Speaker 1 (34:56):
Have to be well again, this person part it has
transported multiple giraffes around the place, so it can be done.
They've got a horse float that can fit a giraffe
in it. For the camel, camels are a lot bigger
than horses.
Speaker 4 (35:09):
Yeah, but I guess getting a live camera into a
stadium with lots of people might cause a few issues.
They might get spoken camels. Camels are pretty good. I
know that.
Speaker 3 (35:21):
Over and Dubai they've got because they do all the
desert tours. You can go out there. I've done it.
Speaker 1 (35:26):
Sit on the back of camel with your missus and
right around blah blah blah, so fucking uncomfortable in the back.
An issue that they're having over there is that they'll
just set up their little tent thing and have their
cultural night there. You go as a tourist, but they're
set up in the same spot as all the June
bashes are, and so the problem they're having is dudes
come flying over a june and you're park sixty camels there,
(35:47):
so they are obliterating camels.
Speaker 4 (35:48):
Well, I'll say the camels. I saw the funniest shit
in the Middle East when I lived there. You'd be
driving along and there be a car in front of
you with a trailer and and it is a camel
laid down and it's head coming over the back looking
at you out of the out of the trailer. Just
a flat trailer, not like a big trailer. And I
took a photo of it because I was like, this
camel is just it's tied down with tidoun and it
(36:11):
drops strops and it says, looking out the back of
this flat looking lips are like, because it's on the
back and the lips are flying over it, this place
is weird. The funniest looking back. Yeah, and they and
they want to obviously wander around the desert. Is they
obviously some better ones look after them. But you'd be
driving along and one would just be walking across the road.
You're doing one hundred and eighty and a cam You
(36:31):
don't want to hur to cut a camel at one
hundred and eighty. God, you clean the legs out, no problem,
but it's there. It's then the one ton upper body
that wishes you.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
They are the funniest looking animals of all time.
Speaker 3 (36:43):
Camels.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
You just see them standing on the side of the
road eating a cactus. No worries. Well, maybe here's a
text from my missus right now, she's coming. She's going
to drop my bloody lunch off. Okay, good shre So
I will ask her if she knows of any camels.
Speaker 4 (36:56):
I think we need to think a bit more lattery
laterally on this because even if we do find a camel,
yeah I'm sure. I mean, we've done some stupid shit
in some stadiums before, but I'm pretty sure they might
veto the camel.
Speaker 1 (37:09):
So we run a Trojan camel situation where we somehow
try and drive it in and the pretens do we say, hey,
as a gesture of good will for Tim Southy's last
ever game, we'd like you to allow us to bring
the caravan back in, and inside the caravan we have
a Bactrian camel.
Speaker 3 (37:27):
From the deserts of the Middle East.
Speaker 4 (37:29):
Rip the roof off the caravan, but the roof's already ripped,
speaking which we are. We're commentating the chasing the fox
from the caravan, and we've just had a notification both
the warrant and the ridge over've expired. Okay, but I
will ask.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Him if he thanks are good for the camel in it?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
Otherwise, like I said, maybe it's a stuffed camel. We've
got a taxi doomid camel anywhere?
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Oh, you just roll it in, Yeah, and.
Speaker 4 (37:51):
We can put that on casters. Otherwise we might be
having to go for the Surely we can get some
little blow up camels. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm not
sure where from?
Speaker 3 (38:02):
No, lookshup.
Speaker 4 (38:04):
Can we go to someone like Philip Morris, a cigarette
company and say, have you got any leftover camel merch?
Get out there.
Speaker 3 (38:10):
That's a good point.
Speaker 4 (38:11):
Camel cigarette.
Speaker 1 (38:11):
There's a liquor store called camel. Anyway, We're off into
the words now, ok yeah, reach out camel owners. If
anyone out there knows of a camera, will please get
in touch. This is our one mission for the summer.
Enjoy the rest of your sunny Tuesday. Hopefully it is
sunny wherever you are, and we will be back tomorrow
for a Wednesday episode of the Gender Podcast.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
You've been listening to the ACC's a gender podcast brought
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