September 24, 2024 • 6 mins
It's Mental Health Awareness Week and today we talk to an inspirational woman who really has walked the walked with her husband Wayne, the President of Federated Farmers.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is Mental Health Awareness Week here on the country.
It's supported by Federated Farmers. They're backing key we farmers
when times are tough. Well, here's someone who can not
only talk the talk, she can walk the walk. Her
name is Tyler Langford, the Better Half. I think I
can say that Tyler of the Tyler and Wayne Langford Show.
(00:21):
Here's a starter for you. Tyler. Are you two ever
at home?
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Yeah, that's a great question. Hey, look well we are.
Really we're sort of. We're home pretty much most weekends
together because we do sport and stuff and running around
doing that. But yet during our week we're definitely busy.
We are crossing paths constantly. But I always say it
takes a village, and in our case it's differently, it's
definitely how it goes.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
So Wayne is the president of Federated Farmers. Tyler, you
spend a lot of time traveling. I know today, for instance,
you're making your way to Ashburton to do a presentation
to the Rural Support Trust on mental health. You are
walking the walk in your case because you've got firsthand experience.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Of all this. Yeah, I do. So we were really,
like you say, we have put together a few films
over the time, but we were really, I guess, unfortunate,
but we caught the world's greatest blessing to Hedwayne go
into some dark times several years ago now, and Wayne
actually started sharing his journey, and then one of the
(01:25):
kind of things that came out of it was people
just started asking questions about what it was like to
be the partner, and so I sort of felt, not
necessarily an obligation, but I guess really a privilege to
share my part of the story and hope that if
someone else was in my situation they wouldn't feel as
alone and isolated as I did when I was going
through it with Lane.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
For all of us who know him, and he's doing
a great job as the front man for Federated Farmers,
he has boundless energy, always got a silly grin on
his face. He's very sharp. I just can't imagine the
guy being down, I know, and.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
That's actually it's a really point in Jamien's I think
it's actually something. It's probably one of the illusions we
need to I guess, break down from a mental health
point of view, because we look at the people who
are overly positive and overly outgoing and we think, oh, no,
they're not struggling, but actually then themselves have their own
struggles and behind the scenes, and they're probably the ones
we need to watch because they project a different image
(02:20):
to the world than the one they're struggling with at home.
And so yeah, for him, and he was I think
he was still doing dairy cheer stuff at the time,
so he was still really engaged with the industry, but
he would just come home and go to bed for
days on end. And so yeah, I think that's a
really good point. You're raised, and those are the people
I think we need to keep a really good eye on.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
When was rock bottom for you?
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Yeah, so for us it was Wayne talks about it
his thirty fourth birthday, so for us that was two
thy seventeen. I think actually for me it was probably
a few months before. So I say, it wasn't something
that happened overnight. This was like sort of a slow
fog that creept in over our valley which we often meet,
and you know, we just lost little bits of Wayne
(03:05):
over and over again, you know, from pulling away from
his friends, to you know, not hanging out with his children,
to not making decisions on farm and then eventually for Wayne,
he had a breaking point. I guess where he recognized it.
But for us it was and I say, asked, because
of the boys, it was well and truly before then
that we were really struggling.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
What was the turning point? What turned him around?
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Yeah? So for Wayne, so he actually we went to
the beach on his thirty fourth birthday and we just
had a great day. We happened to live in a
beautiful part of New Zealand and he drove back to
the house with me and he just looked at me
and he said, you know, I think we need to
do something to say we've lived every day. And I
wouldn't say it was a turning point, because I think
for mental health it's up and down. You know, it's
(03:50):
a rollercoaster however you want to metaphor it. But that
for him was a point where he was like, Okay,
I can take one step forward. There were days ten
steps back, but it least, I think for the first time,
probably in about eighteen months, he was actually taking one
step forward and not constant steps back.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
What's your word of advice to women out there or
blokes out there whose partner is suffering from depression and
perhaps they haven't come to terms with it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
So my first word of advice I say to people
is get it wrapped around your head that it is
not about you. So's you cannot be a better wife,
a better mother, a better farmer, a bet of anything else.
This is their journey. And you can walk beside them,
and you can walk in front of them showing them way,
and you can kick their butts sometimes like I did
with Wayne, but you can't do it for them. So
my word of advice is just make sure that you
(04:41):
are putting the things in place to support you so
that you can support them.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Let's just finish on a more humorous phone. Tell me
how you and Wayne met.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yeah, so we met day two or three at Lincoln University.
I didn't actually, as much as it will make you laugh,
I didn't realize Lincoln an agricultural guin until I got there.
I just that I wanted to go somewhere I didn't
know anyone, and I definitely didn't know anyone at Lincoln.
And on the second day it was Valentine's Day and
Wayne was walking around with us. They love heart stretcher's
(05:12):
chairs with the whole little love hearts in his hand,
saying to the girls, would you like a piece of
my heart? Handing it out? And I have to have Matt, Jamie.
I actually wrote in my diary that day and someone
read it out. At our wedding met a guy called
Wayne lengthor today what a deck. So I definitely was
not love it for a sight, but he grew on
me or wore me down. You take your pack of
(05:34):
the metaphors and so yeah, it's a long time ago
now over twenty years ago, but he's differently. He's definitely
wanted to keep around for a while.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Well, he's a keeper. He's grown on us all. Look.
I think you two are sort of the posh and
becks of New Zealand agriculture, the power couple. Next thing
will be a Netflix documentary on you, Tyler Langford. Thank
you so much for some of your time today for
Mental Health Awareness Week, of course supported by Federated Farmers
Wayne as the president. He's doing a great job. And
(06:04):
behind every great Federated Farmer's president there is a great
woman and you truly are one. Thanks for your time.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Awesome Thanks Jamie. Great chat.
It is Mental Health Awareness Week here on the country.
It's supported by Federated Farmers. They're backing key we farmers
when times are tough. Well, here's someone who can not
only talk the talk, she can walk the walk. Her
name is Tyler Langford, the Better Half. I think I
can say that Tyler of the Tyler and Wayne Langford Show.
(00:21):
Here's a starter for you. Tyler. Are you two ever
at home?
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Yeah, that's a great question. Hey, look well we are.
Really we're sort of. We're home pretty much most weekends
together because we do sport and stuff and running around
doing that. But yet during our week we're definitely busy.
We are crossing paths constantly. But I always say it
takes a village, and in our case it's differently, it's
definitely how it goes.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
So Wayne is the president of Federated Farmers. Tyler, you
spend a lot of time traveling. I know today, for instance,
you're making your way to Ashburton to do a presentation
to the Rural Support Trust on mental health. You are
walking the walk in your case because you've got firsthand experience.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Of all this. Yeah, I do. So we were really,
like you say, we have put together a few films
over the time, but we were really, I guess, unfortunate,
but we caught the world's greatest blessing to Hedwayne go
into some dark times several years ago now, and Wayne
actually started sharing his journey, and then one of the
(01:25):
kind of things that came out of it was people
just started asking questions about what it was like to
be the partner, and so I sort of felt, not
necessarily an obligation, but I guess really a privilege to
share my part of the story and hope that if
someone else was in my situation they wouldn't feel as
alone and isolated as I did when I was going
through it with Lane.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
For all of us who know him, and he's doing
a great job as the front man for Federated Farmers,
he has boundless energy, always got a silly grin on
his face. He's very sharp. I just can't imagine the
guy being down, I know, and.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
That's actually it's a really point in Jamien's I think
it's actually something. It's probably one of the illusions we
need to I guess, break down from a mental health
point of view, because we look at the people who
are overly positive and overly outgoing and we think, oh, no,
they're not struggling, but actually then themselves have their own
struggles and behind the scenes, and they're probably the ones
we need to watch because they project a different image
(02:20):
to the world than the one they're struggling with at home.
And so yeah, for him, and he was I think
he was still doing dairy cheer stuff at the time,
so he was still really engaged with the industry, but
he would just come home and go to bed for
days on end. And so yeah, I think that's a
really good point. You're raised, and those are the people
I think we need to keep a really good eye on.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
When was rock bottom for you?
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Yeah, so for us it was Wayne talks about it
his thirty fourth birthday, so for us that was two
thy seventeen. I think actually for me it was probably
a few months before. So I say, it wasn't something
that happened overnight. This was like sort of a slow
fog that creept in over our valley which we often meet,
and you know, we just lost little bits of Wayne
(03:05):
over and over again, you know, from pulling away from
his friends, to you know, not hanging out with his children,
to not making decisions on farm and then eventually for Wayne,
he had a breaking point. I guess where he recognized it.
But for us it was and I say, asked, because
of the boys, it was well and truly before then
that we were really struggling.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
What was the turning point? What turned him around?
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Yeah? So for Wayne, so he actually we went to
the beach on his thirty fourth birthday and we just
had a great day. We happened to live in a
beautiful part of New Zealand and he drove back to
the house with me and he just looked at me
and he said, you know, I think we need to
do something to say we've lived every day. And I
wouldn't say it was a turning point, because I think
for mental health it's up and down. You know, it's
(03:50):
a rollercoaster however you want to metaphor it. But that
for him was a point where he was like, Okay,
I can take one step forward. There were days ten
steps back, but it least, I think for the first time,
probably in about eighteen months, he was actually taking one
step forward and not constant steps back.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
What's your word of advice to women out there or
blokes out there whose partner is suffering from depression and
perhaps they haven't come to terms with it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
So my first word of advice I say to people
is get it wrapped around your head that it is
not about you. So's you cannot be a better wife,
a better mother, a better farmer, a bet of anything else.
This is their journey. And you can walk beside them,
and you can walk in front of them showing them way,
and you can kick their butts sometimes like I did
with Wayne, but you can't do it for them. So
my word of advice is just make sure that you
(04:41):
are putting the things in place to support you so
that you can support them.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Let's just finish on a more humorous phone. Tell me
how you and Wayne met.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
Yeah, so we met day two or three at Lincoln University.
I didn't actually, as much as it will make you laugh,
I didn't realize Lincoln an agricultural guin until I got there.
I just that I wanted to go somewhere I didn't
know anyone, and I definitely didn't know anyone at Lincoln.
And on the second day it was Valentine's Day and
Wayne was walking around with us. They love heart stretcher's
(05:12):
chairs with the whole little love hearts in his hand,
saying to the girls, would you like a piece of
my heart? Handing it out? And I have to have Matt, Jamie.
I actually wrote in my diary that day and someone
read it out. At our wedding met a guy called
Wayne lengthor today what a deck. So I definitely was
not love it for a sight, but he grew on
me or wore me down. You take your pack of
(05:34):
the metaphors and so yeah, it's a long time ago
now over twenty years ago, but he's differently. He's definitely
wanted to keep around for a while.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Well, he's a keeper. He's grown on us all. Look.
I think you two are sort of the posh and
becks of New Zealand agriculture, the power couple. Next thing
will be a Netflix documentary on you, Tyler Langford. Thank
you so much for some of your time today for
Mental Health Awareness Week, of course supported by Federated Farmers
Wayne as the president. He's doing a great job. And
(06:04):
behind every great Federated Farmer's president there is a great
woman and you truly are one. Thanks for your time.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Awesome Thanks Jamie. Great chat.
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