December 23, 2025 • 15 mins
On today's unheard moments from 2025, get a Powerade and a pie, undo your shorts and wash your swamp ass.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Whole Aching Big Show with Jason, Mike and Keyzy.
Tune in week days at four on Radio hod IK
Lincoln Park.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
There on the Radio Honarchy Big Show this Monday afternoon.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
The time is twenty six minutes past four o'clock.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
We're talking about horrendous things to do when you hungover, yeah,
and not that it was horrendous that you went to
watch your daughter play do ballet.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
That's right.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
I went to my daughter, six year old daughter's ballet
recital yesterday. It's a massive school that did great work,
but it doesn't feel like the best thing you could
be doing with your time when you're massively hungover, going
to a two and a half hour long show and
pretty brutal heat yesterday here in Auckland.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
You just reminded me too, actually, Mogi of another thing
that was a nightmare back in the day for me
was the old sports tawneys.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
So it would be an all day a fear, yeah,
and so you'd have to go. I mean, I loved
watching my girls play sport, genuinely, But if you're pretty
hungover and she's pissing down all day and you're standing
on the sidelines just going ah.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Anything a couch man. Yeah, yes, interested, like you said
the should we go under the beach for an ice cream?
It's absolutely not absolutely.
Speaker 5 (01:10):
Someone here says text through on three four out three
three four eight three watching junior nitball in the rain
as a ball lake. Yes, I think I mean ball lake. Yeah,
but they agree with you, Jose.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
A lot of my girls playing netball, so I did
a lot of that. I basically stayed in the car
with my spectacles, you know, with machades on, and just
observed it from there.
Speaker 5 (01:32):
My newspaper, heaps of ticks coming in on three through.
The worst thing UK have done whilst hungover. Someone here
jack hammering, that would be pretty tough, Okada, fellows. I
went to my mate's funeral hungover. A bunch of us
caught up the night before. I didn't shot the bed
in the morning of the funeral.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
Not good, although could be worse.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Yeah, because it was. Yes, but that is pretty Ballet
show Sunday morning, three hours long. Little cute, little kids
are cute, but this was an adult first time ballet
class that they were watching. It goes on to start,
I want to see your mum looking like a sausage
and a leotard on stage under mistletoe.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
No.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Worst thing was my mate's daughter's first birthday a couple
of years ago. Butterfly Creek, which is up here in Auckland.
I know the place is almost died waiting for them
to feed the alligators. Felt like I was going to faint,
but there were kids and alligators everywhere. So it's just
it's not good, is it.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
I told you the other day he felt. I was
on the podcast Outra. My wife booked us tickets to
a choir. I wasn't hungover or anything, but it was
two hours long and it was an old a choir.
Speaker 4 (02:44):
Yes of enthusiasts, Yeah, that's right, enthusias, plenty of enthusiasts.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
And as soon as the first note hit the air,
I went, We've got.
Speaker 5 (02:54):
Lyle from Auckland on the line. Gooday, Lyle, Yeah, good, Hey,
what's the worst thing you've done?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Well?
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Hungover?
Speaker 6 (03:02):
Well, back in the day when I was first going
out with the missus, she's a scientist, and we went
to a native bird release and they fenced predator free
and it happened to be on a Sunday morning, right.
Speaker 5 (03:18):
Hangover, and they were what were they doing? They were releasing.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
Birds, releasing endangered bird.
Speaker 5 (03:24):
Right, okay, and you're hungover doing that? Yeah that sounds bloody.
Speaker 6 (03:28):
So you know it was a windy road there. That
was tough. Luckily she picked me up. Yeah, I do remember.
The bird was a stitch bird. I think, tiniest bird
you've ever seen. So when when all the kids lined up,
(03:48):
they all opened the box, they were so fast you
didn't even see them come out. And then you know,
the paper were there and everything, and I'm like, is that?
And then a walk and I had to sit under
a tree for a while.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
I was.
Speaker 5 (04:04):
Yeah, good on your law. That's an excellent story mate.
You hold the line old pugs on a hook. You
up for something good?
Speaker 2 (04:09):
What about you, Kezy, because I mean, I know you
don't have kids and stuff, but yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:17):
I'm going to should.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
I what you announce that?
Speaker 4 (04:21):
I'm all right. I promised I wouldn't say that.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
Yeah, you know, no, no, stop announcing that I'm having kids.
Speaker 4 (04:27):
We're not. You're announcing. If there's one thing I know,
if anybody is going to announce the fact that your
wife is pregnant, it's going to be you.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Yes, totally, I'm not going to do it.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
But you've been hungover a few times in your life, keasy,
what's the worst thing you have had to do?
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Probably this show right now, The Hidarchy Big Show week
days from four on Radio Hdarky.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Indeed, David Bewie there on the radio Holdarky Big Show
this Tuesday afternoon of time, twenty three minutes past five o'clock.
Speaker 4 (04:58):
Fellas, I'm a little bit worried that I'm getting old. Okay,
I've had a couple of things going on lately, you know. Well,
one of them is that I keep losing everything. Old
old Foggy Moggie is losing his car keys, He's losing
his wallet, his sunglasses and pretty much everything. Yes, everyone
carry it around with me. I can lose it. I
haven't lost my balls yet, no marbles? Oh yeah no, what.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
Well, you need a fanny pack?
Speaker 4 (05:23):
Cheers, cheers? Well, Christmas is coming, So I kept that
in mine.
Speaker 5 (05:27):
Brother. That's actually a really good idea. If you just
had a fanny pack, yes, with all that stuff in it, Yes,
could be a you know.
Speaker 4 (05:33):
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, I agree. Happy happy holiday.
So old Mogi came out. This is exciting. Hey, guys,
I went to a cafeteria the other day, a cafe
they call them here in Auckland. And as further evidence
that I'm getting old, I was speaking to the waitress
there and a dad joke formed in my mind, clear
(05:55):
as day, right in front of me, in my mind's eye. Okay,
not visible to anybody else right now.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
I saw it.
Speaker 4 (06:01):
I read it, and I went in my head. I
was like, now, I'm not saying that. She left the
waitress and then I told my wife. I said, she
so that was close. I nearly said a dad's joke.
She said, what was a dad's joke? And I told
her what it was, and she says, oh yeah, Jesus,
oh god, that's not good. Now I'm assuming that time
is going to come where I don't think that's not
that's not a go. I'm just going to start saying
(06:22):
it as far it out. Is that how it worked
for you, James, because obviously you've got four daughters.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yeah, look, they're just contant. That don't stop now pour
out of me.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (06:32):
So if I was to say to you, Dad, I'm hungry,
what would you say.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Go and get a job and pay for your own food?
You sponge?
Speaker 5 (06:41):
Right, I thought you were said, high hungry. I'm dead?
Speaker 4 (06:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Is that not?
Speaker 4 (06:45):
That's another word?
Speaker 5 (06:46):
Yeah, it's yeah, okay, cool? Right, So how do you
want to tell us what the dad joke was?
Speaker 4 (06:51):
Well, I think context is a key, because I thought
my wife was bloody harsh on me. Actually I could
see her falling even further out of love with me
as I described it. But I said to her, in
my defense, I didn't say it. I only thought it.
I recognized that it was a terrible joke, and I
didn't say it. Surely I get some respect for that.
She said, no, you don't, right, right, yeah, So can
we can we play this out? Keysy? Is it or?
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Good? Man?
Speaker 4 (07:11):
I want you to? Can you be the waitress? Okay, okay,
all right? The waitress? Yeah she was a waitress. Okay,
yeah you're a waitress. Yeah, you're the waitress. And I'm
just sitting down at the table. And it's me and
my daughter, Mogi Minogui, who's six years old, and then
my and my wife as well, whose age doesn't matter, Keysy,
it's none of your business, all.
Speaker 5 (07:30):
Right, who's playing? So is Jase playing someone? Jase, You're
gonna be my missus if you want?
Speaker 4 (07:34):
Men? Oh, yeah, I'll just I'll just be sitting here. Okay, okay, okay,
here we go.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
Hi there, Hi, How are you good? Thanks? Would you
guys like something to drink to start?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (07:48):
Yes, please? I think I'm going to hear. I have
an especially with some hot water on the side, and
I'll get a fluffy for my from a little mate
over here.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
And I'll have an oat flat white. Thank you.
Speaker 5 (08:00):
Okay, no problem, man. Would you guys like some coloring
pencils as well? Oh?
Speaker 4 (08:04):
Yes please? And can I have some for my for
my daughter as well? So that was the dad joke.
So that was a dad joke.
Speaker 5 (08:14):
I thought you were gonna say not for me like
that would to be fair that it was the funnier
dad joke that I thought.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
Yeah, it's not too bad. It's too bad.
Speaker 4 (08:22):
It felt shocking because my wife's talking divorce. Yeah, yeah right,
I mean it's not great.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
I don't want to I think, yeah, I just don't
need to be too hard on yourself.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I mean it's a shocker, yeah right.
Speaker 4 (08:34):
Because the other problem as well is what the waitress
early twenties. Now, if I'm saying that joke to somebody
who's older, sort of my age. It's sort of like
he gives you know, you're just an idiot anyway. Yeah,
but as just sort of young people think you're suck anyway.
So coming in with a joke like that is just
going to be you know, you're gonna get hit with
some real fake laughter.
Speaker 5 (08:56):
Good one, Mogi.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
I would actually be a show with Jason, Mike and
keysy tune in week days and four on Radio Hodarkey.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Off spring there on the radio hold Archy Big Show
this Friday afternoon.
Speaker 5 (09:10):
Day fellas, you might notice pug Sons.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
In the room.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
Yes, hello, hey you pie guys. Pugs, Hey, first time
in the new studio guys. Yeah, oh man, so good.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
That's a different thing.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Not loving your cap.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
Okay, Pugs, Not loving your turkeys Pugs.
Speaker 5 (09:25):
Yeah turkey shit. No, seriously though, Pugs. I've got a
bone pit with you, man, What I got a bone
a pit? You mentioned something yesterday which I thought was disgusting.
What you said that you went for a run, which
is great, but you said that you needed to do
wheeze and that your pants were too tight, and so
instead of undoing your pants, you knelt down and pulled
(09:48):
your pant legs sideways and peede out the side of
your shorts. What say you?
Speaker 7 (09:53):
I have a few corrections to make their keysy. Right first,
before I get to those, thank you for your compliment
on my running.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Okay, really appreciated running is great. Yeah, i'd say your
running was great, but yes, go four k. Well, I
appreciate it was really hard. Secondly, there was no kneeling.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
Involved because it's a Jerry Collins.
Speaker 5 (10:15):
Yeah, that's the Jerry Collins before the during the hucker,
not just after the hukker.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Right near on the field and get your piece out
and then urinate on what was the cake?
Speaker 5 (10:23):
T believe was the ca yea on National Teller. Yeah,
really really.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
Loved that from him.
Speaker 5 (10:29):
Uh, there was no kneeling.
Speaker 7 (10:31):
It was simply pull the pant the short leg as
far across as was appropriate to avoid any splashing.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
Right.
Speaker 7 (10:40):
Yeah, And the reason they weren't too tight the waistband
was too tight.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
Because I was about to go for a running.
Speaker 7 (10:45):
They got them the perfect amount of tightness that they
wouldn't do any falling while I was running. So the
drawstring was really tight and I couldn't be bothered getting
them back to that perfect into a toilet.
Speaker 5 (10:54):
Yes, oh right, I thought you.
Speaker 7 (10:56):
Sorry, Chris, if I can say in the privacy of
my own home, if that's okay with you.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
I was wondering. I want you to know that. And
I can't speak for you, Jos, but I knew nothing
about this bone to pick, and I don't support it.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
The same thing when I'm wearing jeans.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
Chase Jace.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
No one believes that your peace all the way down
to the bottom of your bone.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
De peck with me this bullshit.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
I got a bone a bit.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
I'm with Moggie on this surprise and the fact that
you had a bone depick without informing Moggie. And I
want you because I would never have allowed your bone
to be picked. If that's what.
Speaker 5 (11:37):
Who made you the picking bone police, the people that
have to approve every bone that's getting picked.
Speaker 4 (11:42):
I'm going to say that I often do that as well.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
Pat.
Speaker 4 (11:45):
So you reach down your under hook. It's a classic
under hook. You get a bit of a crab claw
going on, you pull it over to the side there
after the races, and then just let it snap back
into position. If you haven't urinated like that, Kisa, you
haven't lived man. It's just another sign to me that
you're living two shelters a light.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
I agree.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
If now, can I tell you something that you probably
you guys will be a little bit grossed out by this, maybe,
but often when I'm walking to the car with your Keysy,
I'm just weaing as we're walking along, and she's just
going out into the gut of there.
Speaker 5 (12:19):
Well, are you like sure shait redemption and you're just
emptying it out at the bottom of your trouser legs.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Yeah, out of the jean legs on the way to
the car, because I because you know what happens.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
You need to go to the toilet and it takes.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
Agey, You've got the staccato wheeze going, So I've.
Speaker 5 (12:35):
Got staccato wheeze now right. So I was wondering why
wherever we went you lift a snail trail. It's disgusting.
That explains the smell too. Sorry for the bone to
pick pugs. It seems I was wrong.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
Yeah, The Hiarchy Big Show was Jason, Mike and Kezy
tune in on Radio.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Hoki smashing pumpkins. There on the Radio Hodoki Big Show.
There's glorious now Thursday.
Speaker 4 (12:59):
Evening, fellas, man, have I got a story for you?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Great stuff.
Speaker 4 (13:05):
This music appropriate? Maybe the sexy music actually.
Speaker 5 (13:10):
Okay, I can't do man.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Oh yeah, last night I had, for the very first
time in my life, a shower.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Oh yeah, now you.
Speaker 5 (13:24):
Too, the first shower.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Let me finish.
Speaker 5 (13:27):
Sorry, did I interrupt you?
Speaker 4 (13:30):
Where I didn't wet my hair? What? I can't remember.
I don't think i've ever. I don't think i've ever
in my life had a shower and not put my
head underneath the knows it a force? It's that head?
Speaker 3 (13:43):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (13:47):
And I said to my wife, I think it's the
first time because I just couldn't be by the drug,
because I was literally just getting into bed straight afterwards.
And I thought there's no real point because I had
the case of the swamp ass.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
Because he was cycling.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
I wasn't. But it was quite bad. Do you know
how bad the swamp? And this is? I guess this
is a bit of a sidebar here. We'll come back
to the chat about the heres keeezy, all right. It
was so bad that I actually went to bed, and
then I was lying in bed, I was like, you
know what, I've got every shower.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
So should I keep the sexy music on?
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Swamp?
Speaker 3 (14:19):
Yeah? I'm finding this real hot.
Speaker 5 (14:23):
Well him having swamp pass.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
Yeah, well the bit where I cleaned it out, that was.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
I cleaned it out, opened some SuDS there.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
But I was wondering with you guys, when it comes
to have a shower, do you always have swamp ass? Sorry, no,
you're here, I'm always you here.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I don't consider that I've had a shower unless I
do so, thank you.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
Right, Okay, So that's how you define having a shower.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
I can't conceive of having a sho without whipping right here.
Speaker 3 (15:01):
But you were saying, we're a shower cap.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Uh.
Speaker 5 (15:06):
Sometimes, like if I've done my hair real nice, one.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Of those sort of puffy putting sort of things on your.
Speaker 5 (15:13):
Hair, Yeah, puffy pudding put that on my hair there.
Sometimes I've done my hair real nice and I've got
swamp pass.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Yeah. Gross.
Speaker 4 (15:20):
You put a cap over your swamp ass just so
it doesn't get washed out, to preserve it. You don't
want to ruin it.
Speaker 5 (15:28):
Yeah, sometimes like a puffy pudding swamps.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
I don't get swamp passed because the hell's swamp pass
because I wipe so thoroughly.
Speaker 5 (15:42):
I still think we should get rid of the sixy music, No,
it's this is hot, is it?
Speaker 2 (15:46):
I mean you you grace me out a bit, but
Mogi swamp Pass bring it.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
The wold Aking Big Show with Mike and Kesy. Tune
in week days and four on Radio Hodaki
The Whole Aching Big Show with Jason, Mike and Keyzy.
Tune in week days at four on Radio hod IK
Lincoln Park.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
There on the Radio Honarchy Big Show this Monday afternoon.
Speaker 3 (00:10):
The time is twenty six minutes past four o'clock.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
We're talking about horrendous things to do when you hungover, yeah,
and not that it was horrendous that you went to
watch your daughter play do ballet.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
That's right.
Speaker 4 (00:22):
I went to my daughter, six year old daughter's ballet
recital yesterday. It's a massive school that did great work,
but it doesn't feel like the best thing you could
be doing with your time when you're massively hungover, going
to a two and a half hour long show and
pretty brutal heat yesterday here in Auckland.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
You just reminded me too, actually, Mogi of another thing
that was a nightmare back in the day for me
was the old sports tawneys.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
So it would be an all day a fear, yeah,
and so you'd have to go. I mean, I loved
watching my girls play sport, genuinely, But if you're pretty
hungover and she's pissing down all day and you're standing
on the sidelines just going ah.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Anything a couch man. Yeah, yes, interested, like you said
the should we go under the beach for an ice cream?
It's absolutely not absolutely.
Speaker 5 (01:10):
Someone here says text through on three four out three
three four eight three watching junior nitball in the rain
as a ball lake. Yes, I think I mean ball lake. Yeah,
but they agree with you, Jose.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
A lot of my girls playing netball, so I did
a lot of that. I basically stayed in the car
with my spectacles, you know, with machades on, and just
observed it from there.
Speaker 5 (01:32):
My newspaper, heaps of ticks coming in on three through.
The worst thing UK have done whilst hungover. Someone here
jack hammering, that would be pretty tough, Okada, fellows. I
went to my mate's funeral hungover. A bunch of us
caught up the night before. I didn't shot the bed
in the morning of the funeral.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
Not good, although could be worse.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Yeah, because it was. Yes, but that is pretty Ballet
show Sunday morning, three hours long. Little cute, little kids
are cute, but this was an adult first time ballet
class that they were watching. It goes on to start,
I want to see your mum looking like a sausage
and a leotard on stage under mistletoe.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
No.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Worst thing was my mate's daughter's first birthday a couple
of years ago. Butterfly Creek, which is up here in Auckland.
I know the place is almost died waiting for them
to feed the alligators. Felt like I was going to faint,
but there were kids and alligators everywhere. So it's just
it's not good, is it.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
I told you the other day he felt. I was
on the podcast Outra. My wife booked us tickets to
a choir. I wasn't hungover or anything, but it was
two hours long and it was an old a choir.
Speaker 4 (02:44):
Yes of enthusiasts, Yeah, that's right, enthusias, plenty of enthusiasts.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
And as soon as the first note hit the air,
I went, We've got.
Speaker 5 (02:54):
Lyle from Auckland on the line. Gooday, Lyle, Yeah, good, Hey,
what's the worst thing you've done?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Well?
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Hungover?
Speaker 6 (03:02):
Well, back in the day when I was first going
out with the missus, she's a scientist, and we went
to a native bird release and they fenced predator free
and it happened to be on a Sunday morning, right.
Speaker 5 (03:18):
Hangover, and they were what were they doing? They were releasing.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
Birds, releasing endangered bird.
Speaker 5 (03:24):
Right, okay, and you're hungover doing that? Yeah that sounds bloody.
Speaker 6 (03:28):
So you know it was a windy road there. That
was tough. Luckily she picked me up. Yeah, I do remember.
The bird was a stitch bird. I think, tiniest bird
you've ever seen. So when when all the kids lined up,
(03:48):
they all opened the box, they were so fast you
didn't even see them come out. And then you know,
the paper were there and everything, and I'm like, is that?
And then a walk and I had to sit under
a tree for a while.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
I was.
Speaker 5 (04:04):
Yeah, good on your law. That's an excellent story mate.
You hold the line old pugs on a hook. You
up for something good?
Speaker 2 (04:09):
What about you, Kezy, because I mean, I know you
don't have kids and stuff, but yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:17):
I'm going to should.
Speaker 3 (04:18):
I what you announce that?
Speaker 4 (04:21):
I'm all right. I promised I wouldn't say that.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
Yeah, you know, no, no, stop announcing that I'm having kids.
Speaker 4 (04:27):
We're not. You're announcing. If there's one thing I know,
if anybody is going to announce the fact that your
wife is pregnant, it's going to be you.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
Yes, totally, I'm not going to do it.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
But you've been hungover a few times in your life, keasy,
what's the worst thing you have had to do?
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Probably this show right now, The Hidarchy Big Show week
days from four on Radio Hdarky.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Indeed, David Bewie there on the radio Holdarky Big Show
this Tuesday afternoon of time, twenty three minutes past five o'clock.
Speaker 4 (04:58):
Fellas, I'm a little bit worried that I'm getting old. Okay,
I've had a couple of things going on lately, you know. Well,
one of them is that I keep losing everything. Old
old Foggy Moggie is losing his car keys, He's losing
his wallet, his sunglasses and pretty much everything. Yes, everyone
carry it around with me. I can lose it. I
haven't lost my balls yet, no marbles? Oh yeah no, what.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
Well, you need a fanny pack?
Speaker 4 (05:23):
Cheers, cheers? Well, Christmas is coming, So I kept that
in mine.
Speaker 5 (05:27):
Brother. That's actually a really good idea. If you just
had a fanny pack, yes, with all that stuff in it, Yes,
could be a you know.
Speaker 4 (05:33):
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, I agree. Happy happy holiday.
So old Mogi came out. This is exciting. Hey, guys,
I went to a cafeteria the other day, a cafe
they call them here in Auckland. And as further evidence
that I'm getting old, I was speaking to the waitress
there and a dad joke formed in my mind, clear
(05:55):
as day, right in front of me, in my mind's eye. Okay,
not visible to anybody else right now.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
I saw it.
Speaker 4 (06:01):
I read it, and I went in my head. I
was like, now, I'm not saying that. She left the
waitress and then I told my wife. I said, she
so that was close. I nearly said a dad's joke.
She said, what was a dad's joke? And I told
her what it was, and she says, oh yeah, Jesus,
oh god, that's not good. Now I'm assuming that time
is going to come where I don't think that's not
that's not a go. I'm just going to start saying
(06:22):
it as far it out. Is that how it worked
for you, James, because obviously you've got four daughters.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yeah, look, they're just contant. That don't stop now pour
out of me.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (06:32):
So if I was to say to you, Dad, I'm hungry,
what would you say.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Go and get a job and pay for your own food?
You sponge?
Speaker 5 (06:41):
Right, I thought you were said, high hungry. I'm dead?
Speaker 4 (06:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Is that not?
Speaker 4 (06:45):
That's another word?
Speaker 5 (06:46):
Yeah, it's yeah, okay, cool? Right, So how do you
want to tell us what the dad joke was?
Speaker 4 (06:51):
Well, I think context is a key, because I thought
my wife was bloody harsh on me. Actually I could
see her falling even further out of love with me
as I described it. But I said to her, in
my defense, I didn't say it. I only thought it.
I recognized that it was a terrible joke, and I
didn't say it. Surely I get some respect for that.
She said, no, you don't, right, right, yeah, So can
we can we play this out? Keysy? Is it or?
Speaker 3 (07:11):
Good? Man?
Speaker 4 (07:11):
I want you to? Can you be the waitress? Okay, okay,
all right? The waitress? Yeah she was a waitress. Okay,
yeah you're a waitress. Yeah, you're the waitress. And I'm
just sitting down at the table. And it's me and
my daughter, Mogi Minogui, who's six years old, and then
my and my wife as well, whose age doesn't matter, Keysy,
it's none of your business, all.
Speaker 5 (07:30):
Right, who's playing? So is Jase playing someone? Jase, You're
gonna be my missus if you want?
Speaker 4 (07:34):
Men? Oh, yeah, I'll just I'll just be sitting here. Okay, okay, okay,
here we go.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
Hi there, Hi, How are you good? Thanks? Would you
guys like something to drink to start?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (07:48):
Yes, please? I think I'm going to hear. I have
an especially with some hot water on the side, and
I'll get a fluffy for my from a little mate
over here.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
And I'll have an oat flat white. Thank you.
Speaker 5 (08:00):
Okay, no problem, man. Would you guys like some coloring
pencils as well? Oh?
Speaker 4 (08:04):
Yes please? And can I have some for my for
my daughter as well? So that was the dad joke.
So that was a dad joke.
Speaker 5 (08:14):
I thought you were gonna say not for me like
that would to be fair that it was the funnier
dad joke that I thought.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
Yeah, it's not too bad. It's too bad.
Speaker 4 (08:22):
It felt shocking because my wife's talking divorce. Yeah, yeah right,
I mean it's not great.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
I don't want to I think, yeah, I just don't
need to be too hard on yourself.
Speaker 3 (08:31):
I mean it's a shocker, yeah right.
Speaker 4 (08:34):
Because the other problem as well is what the waitress
early twenties. Now, if I'm saying that joke to somebody
who's older, sort of my age. It's sort of like
he gives you know, you're just an idiot anyway. Yeah,
but as just sort of young people think you're suck anyway.
So coming in with a joke like that is just
going to be you know, you're gonna get hit with
some real fake laughter.
Speaker 5 (08:56):
Good one, Mogi.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
I would actually be a show with Jason, Mike and
keysy tune in week days and four on Radio Hodarkey.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
Off spring there on the radio hold Archy Big Show
this Friday afternoon.
Speaker 5 (09:10):
Day fellas, you might notice pug Sons.
Speaker 4 (09:12):
In the room.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
Yes, hello, hey you pie guys. Pugs, Hey, first time
in the new studio guys. Yeah, oh man, so good.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
That's a different thing.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Not loving your cap.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
Okay, Pugs, Not loving your turkeys Pugs.
Speaker 5 (09:25):
Yeah turkey shit. No, seriously though, Pugs. I've got a
bone pit with you, man, What I got a bone
a pit? You mentioned something yesterday which I thought was disgusting.
What you said that you went for a run, which
is great, but you said that you needed to do
wheeze and that your pants were too tight, and so
instead of undoing your pants, you knelt down and pulled
(09:48):
your pant legs sideways and peede out the side of
your shorts. What say you?
Speaker 7 (09:53):
I have a few corrections to make their keysy. Right first,
before I get to those, thank you for your compliment
on my running.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Okay, really appreciated running is great. Yeah, i'd say your
running was great, but yes, go four k. Well, I
appreciate it was really hard. Secondly, there was no kneeling.
Speaker 4 (10:13):
Involved because it's a Jerry Collins.
Speaker 5 (10:15):
Yeah, that's the Jerry Collins before the during the hucker,
not just after the hukker.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Right near on the field and get your piece out
and then urinate on what was the cake?
Speaker 5 (10:23):
T believe was the ca yea on National Teller. Yeah,
really really.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
Loved that from him.
Speaker 5 (10:29):
Uh, there was no kneeling.
Speaker 7 (10:31):
It was simply pull the pant the short leg as
far across as was appropriate to avoid any splashing.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
Right.
Speaker 7 (10:40):
Yeah, And the reason they weren't too tight the waistband
was too tight.
Speaker 4 (10:44):
Because I was about to go for a running.
Speaker 7 (10:45):
They got them the perfect amount of tightness that they
wouldn't do any falling while I was running. So the
drawstring was really tight and I couldn't be bothered getting
them back to that perfect into a toilet.
Speaker 5 (10:54):
Yes, oh right, I thought you.
Speaker 7 (10:56):
Sorry, Chris, if I can say in the privacy of
my own home, if that's okay with you.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
I was wondering. I want you to know that. And
I can't speak for you, Jos, but I knew nothing
about this bone to pick, and I don't support it.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
The same thing when I'm wearing jeans.
Speaker 4 (11:12):
Chase Jace.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
No one believes that your peace all the way down
to the bottom of your bone.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
De peck with me this bullshit.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
I got a bone a bit.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
I'm with Moggie on this surprise and the fact that
you had a bone depick without informing Moggie. And I
want you because I would never have allowed your bone
to be picked. If that's what.
Speaker 5 (11:37):
Who made you the picking bone police, the people that
have to approve every bone that's getting picked.
Speaker 4 (11:42):
I'm going to say that I often do that as well.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
Pat.
Speaker 4 (11:45):
So you reach down your under hook. It's a classic
under hook. You get a bit of a crab claw
going on, you pull it over to the side there
after the races, and then just let it snap back
into position. If you haven't urinated like that, Kisa, you
haven't lived man. It's just another sign to me that
you're living two shelters a light.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
I agree.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
If now, can I tell you something that you probably
you guys will be a little bit grossed out by this, maybe,
but often when I'm walking to the car with your Keysy,
I'm just weaing as we're walking along, and she's just
going out into the gut of there.
Speaker 5 (12:19):
Well, are you like sure shait redemption and you're just
emptying it out at the bottom of your trouser legs.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Yeah, out of the jean legs on the way to
the car, because I because you know what happens.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
You need to go to the toilet and it takes.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
Agey, You've got the staccato wheeze going, So I've.
Speaker 5 (12:35):
Got staccato wheeze now right. So I was wondering why
wherever we went you lift a snail trail. It's disgusting.
That explains the smell too. Sorry for the bone to
pick pugs. It seems I was wrong.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
Yeah, The Hiarchy Big Show was Jason, Mike and Kezy
tune in on Radio.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Hoki smashing pumpkins. There on the Radio Hodoki Big Show.
There's glorious now Thursday.
Speaker 4 (12:59):
Evening, fellas, man, have I got a story for you?
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Great stuff.
Speaker 4 (13:05):
This music appropriate? Maybe the sexy music actually.
Speaker 5 (13:10):
Okay, I can't do man.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Oh yeah, last night I had, for the very first
time in my life, a shower.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Oh yeah, now you.
Speaker 5 (13:24):
Too, the first shower.
Speaker 4 (13:26):
Let me finish.
Speaker 5 (13:27):
Sorry, did I interrupt you?
Speaker 4 (13:30):
Where I didn't wet my hair? What? I can't remember.
I don't think i've ever. I don't think i've ever
in my life had a shower and not put my
head underneath the knows it a force? It's that head?
Speaker 3 (13:43):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (13:47):
And I said to my wife, I think it's the
first time because I just couldn't be by the drug,
because I was literally just getting into bed straight afterwards.
And I thought there's no real point because I had
the case of the swamp ass.
Speaker 3 (13:59):
Because he was cycling.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
I wasn't. But it was quite bad. Do you know
how bad the swamp? And this is? I guess this
is a bit of a sidebar here. We'll come back
to the chat about the heres keeezy, all right. It
was so bad that I actually went to bed, and
then I was lying in bed, I was like, you
know what, I've got every shower.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
So should I keep the sexy music on?
Speaker 4 (14:19):
Swamp?
Speaker 3 (14:19):
Yeah? I'm finding this real hot.
Speaker 5 (14:23):
Well him having swamp pass.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
Yeah, well the bit where I cleaned it out, that was.
Speaker 3 (14:28):
I cleaned it out, opened some SuDS there.
Speaker 4 (14:35):
But I was wondering with you guys, when it comes
to have a shower, do you always have swamp ass? Sorry, no,
you're here, I'm always you here.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
I don't consider that I've had a shower unless I
do so, thank you.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
Right, Okay, So that's how you define having a shower.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
I can't conceive of having a sho without whipping right here.
Speaker 3 (15:01):
But you were saying, we're a shower cap.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Uh.
Speaker 5 (15:06):
Sometimes, like if I've done my hair real nice, one.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Of those sort of puffy putting sort of things on your.
Speaker 5 (15:13):
Hair, Yeah, puffy pudding put that on my hair there.
Sometimes I've done my hair real nice and I've got
swamp pass.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Yeah. Gross.
Speaker 4 (15:20):
You put a cap over your swamp ass just so
it doesn't get washed out, to preserve it. You don't
want to ruin it.
Speaker 5 (15:28):
Yeah, sometimes like a puffy pudding swamps.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
I don't get swamp passed because the hell's swamp pass
because I wipe so thoroughly.
Speaker 5 (15:42):
I still think we should get rid of the sixy music, No,
it's this is hot, is it?
Speaker 2 (15:46):
I mean you you grace me out a bit, but
Mogi swamp Pass bring it.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
The wold Aking Big Show with Mike and Kesy. Tune
in week days and four on Radio Hodaki
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