August 21, 2024 • 42 mins
This week Tayla explains how nervous she gets while watching Marcelo play, and it turns into a fight about which toilet she should use... They finally talk about how they first met, and Marcelo has a VERY hot take on cheerleaders.
Follow the behind the scenes funny on TikTok and Instagram: @themontoyaspodcast
Join in as The Montoya’s lift the curtain on the life and relationship of Aussie imports assimilating into New Zealand as a newly married couple. Think Keeping Up with the Kardashians crossed with Modern Family and tune in for the podcast you never knew you needed.
About The Hosts:
Tayla Montoya is an ex-cheerleader, and current radio producer for Jono and Ben on The Hits. Her roots are from a large Italian Australian family, with all the passion and fire that comes with that.
Most importantly, she is like that friend at the BBQ that is constantly surprising the group with a new questionable take, internet-based obsession or just something to annoy her husband.
Marcelo Montoya is a Fijian Australian professional rugby league player and brings insight into what it actually means to be a professional sportsman. He is a little bit bogan, and a whole lot of a perfectionist. He strives for everything in his life to be cantered and deliberate so he can perform at the highest level, while contending with his wife’s need to try and throw him off balance.
This is an iHeartRadio NZ Podcast.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is an iHeart Radio New Zealand podcast. We're back
here every week. But it's Jesus give you material.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Because when I come home there's leftover room. No, there
isn't sit there.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
You're a fucking liar. Yeah, you're one step away from
the actual cheerleaders. You're the closest player. Keep coming a cheerleader.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
On the SIDELO. Hey guys, you are back again for
another episode, bringing the energy with them one Toys Welcome.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Welcome into our spare bedroom. That's what this is.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
We actually filmed in our spare bedroom at home.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
No fancy studio here.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
No fancy allow not yet anyway.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Yeah, watch out, Joe Rogan. We're fucking coming for your setup, mate,
gum knocking bitch, get out. No, I wouldn't want to
be on a podcast with him. Actually I never listened.
Have you listened to his stuff?
Speaker 2 (01:08):
No?
Speaker 1 (01:08):
Yeah, come be bothered. No, I haven't seen a few
weird clips are where he gets high.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
But he's good. He's good at what he does, is
he Yeah? Really? You know, well, because he's a commentator
for the UFC, so.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
That makes him qualify to do a podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, he speaks very well. Oh okay, yeah, true, So
that's why, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
True, one mate? Can can I just say you look good?
You've got a haircut, thank you. You smell really nice too.
That's the big occasion.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Because we're filming our podcast. Okay, and another week you
told me that I looked ugly.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Wow's what it works into mouths.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Now, I'm just using your techniques.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
I didn't say you look ugly, though. I would never
say that because I don't think that. I think you're gorgeous.
I think you're a beautiful specimen, which is why I
chose you to procreate with.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Well, you said something down the lines of I was
looking scruffy, which.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
To me look like you had dropped the ball a bit.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Which so you're pretty much saying, I look.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
What can I just say? You're the first person to
point out when I haven't shaved my legs, You're the
first person to point out when I've got shit on
my face, and you're the first person to point out
on my hand looks like shit. So how does it
feel to get a bit of your own medicine?
Speaker 2 (02:15):
And you know what I've got out of this little
start here is that we're both use it a bit
of our own techniques.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
We are that of a learning yeah right. AnyWho, you
haven't been home for a while, yes, but now it's
lovely to have you back home. So when you do
come home, right, yes? Is there anything that you love
about being home? Doesn't have to be me now, but
(02:43):
like you know, coming back to your own house.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I love coming home to a clean house.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Yeah, that's all that happens often. That's important every time
I assume that that's what you'd come home to.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Yeah, but I feel coming back home to you and
louis really nice.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Yeah, Jesus, that hope.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
So we obviously have no kids yet, so when you
come home and see you guys, it's it's always a
nice surprise.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yep, surprise. And is there anything about when you come
home that I do that pisces you off?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Yes? We spoke about this.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
Did we go? Where was it? I can remember?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
So in our house we have three toilets. The one
downstairs what are you talking? The one downstairs is supposed
to be off use. It's only supposed to be used
for number onesn't.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
How do you not doing this? How do you know
I'm using the toilet downstairs for that?
Speaker 2 (03:39):
When you're not even fucking here because when I come
home there's leftover room. No there is, but don't sit there,
a fucking liar. We can go down right now and
we've got Pumps is here. Pumps can come down with
us and I'll show him right now. So if you
want to carry on, I can go down and show
him right now. Because downstairs, don't hang on toilet. It
(04:01):
doesn't matter. It's downstairs, you do we agree with we moved,
didn't it's downstairs.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Who cares where the fuck it is? It's a fucking toilet.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
See, it doesn't matter you said to me, We're not
using that toil of for number twos, I'll come home
remnants everywhere.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
You want to know the real reason why use that
fucking toilet? Because it's close to the TV. And when
I'm watching your games, I get the fucking runs because
that's how fucking nervous I'm watching your team this season. Okay,
so forgive me. I can't fucking hold it together for
eighty minutes. Okay, fuck you. I won't be judge for
(04:36):
where I go to the toilet.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Am I out? This is a thing.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
This fucking when you when you fucking bomb Japan in
every single one of our fucking toilets in the house
and go to come through. You mate, you need to
go see your fucking doctor because what I smelled when
you got home the other day.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
But that's what happens, because when I come home and
we eat on the weekend, we eat not junk food,
but we'd like to let LOOSEI bit, and then it
all comes out pizza.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
So I understand why you're not going to the toilet downstairs,
But me, I'm not like that. This is really easy
when you're away. I'm on starvation mode.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
It shouldn't even be an issue because we spoke about it.
Would have moved in and you said to me mass
the bottom toiler we don't use for number two. You
said it to me.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Sometimes I just say ship to make you happy, and
then I fucking do it behind your back. You should
know this mine. Now you just piss me off. So
I just go okay, and in my head, I'm gone,
fuck me. This guy's unreal.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
You know what? You know what like you know what?
The The funny thing is, you could get away with
this if you just took the scrubble from the middle
level and took it scrub Well, that's there, you would
have been out of it. That you would have been
out of it. You would have got.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
I'm not carrying the doorlet scrubber down.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You would have got, mate, I wouldn't even know you
used it for the number twos if you just took
the scrubble down, the scrub your ship.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
I'm not living in a cult. Okay, this feels like
I'm under cult leadership. I mean a fucking I'm being
held against my will in this house. I can't even
pick what toilet to ship in.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
That's not a cult. If you agreed on the terms.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Fuck you and your fucking thirst, and I'll keep going
and do a poo in that room until I'm fucking
still getting the runs watching you play make me sick.
And also when we have visitors, because that is the
main toilet that visitors use. Are you literally going to
be like, oh, you can't do a ship down here,
you have so go upstairs.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
All our visitors know to use the toilet on that.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
I tell Casey to go use that toilet. She gets
the runs too when she watches Adam play, So mate,
that toilet's getting a fucking work out. My god, she's
gonna die hearing this. She's gonna love it because me
and her and that this is gonna sound so fucking
(06:59):
we by care. Me and her are that close. We
go to the toilet with the door open so she
can watch the game as well.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
This is disgusting.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
This is what we gonna do.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
The kitchen is right there. The kitchen's they I.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Know what we're cooking for each other too. She makes
a beautiful pasta bake in your kitchen. And the sausage dogs.
They have a sausage dog as well, called Reggie. That's
our sausage dog, Louie's best friend. They're fucking running a
mark in and out of the toilet.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
That's fine. The dogs are running the mark. And guess
what all you past? The bake. Whatever she makes has
ship remnants go on floating around. You shut me the door.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
I don't think too much into this germs and so
I'm a germophobe. I don't care. Am I healthy? I'm
actually fucking thriving. So if I'm eating shit all day,
it must be working fair energy. That's good glucose, they say,
ask a GP. So a lot of people have been
(08:06):
wondering how we actually met.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Who's been wondering, Well, a lot of people. Actually, so
you're making shit up again.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
I'm not. I'm actually not. I'm actually not.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
No one cared, No people do care.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
And it's a fun story, all right, going there. Yeah, So,
like we we met because I worked at the club
used to play for and I was a cheerleader. You
were playing for the twenties at the time, and I
just want to get your perspective on how things unraveled
because like, in my head, females a lot of us
(08:41):
females romanticize the miniscule moments romanticized, Yes, like we make
it bigger in our head than what it was. And
I just liked to know of you who felt the
same vibes as me. So, like the initial contact, like
I knew you from around to the club, but like
the initial contact was at Cargo Bar in Sydney, Right,
(09:02):
So we're both out for a friend's birthday and we
were all out and then you you came through, and
everyone was telling me not to speak to you because
you had a girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
I didn't.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Yeah, well they were lying because they were obviously jealous
that we were hitting it off and they wanted to
have a go at you first. Okay, that ended. Hey,
and I remember I remember this pivotal moment from that
night because I was very You're very standoffish. You come
at me for having resting bitch face. You look like
(09:34):
you were ready to fucking kill someone that night.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
You know what, someone's no one said see me, but
we're winning in Sydney last week and you're just getting
a coffee.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
And then this I don't know if it was a fan,
but he's walking up, but he's obviously he's seen us
having a coffee at a cafe and he's saying, oh, yeah,
I know you boys, and he pointed them in eas
all You're scary really yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Yeah you did? You give off those vibes. You've got
these eyes that always look like you're like judging people.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
I'm not judging, but I'm ready to go. That's what
I'm ready go with. Do what if we're going to
have a crack, we're going to throw it down.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
No one, lets not throw it down with you, especially men.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Shut it on you.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I'm just trying to get a free drink out of you.
I'm not fucking trying to run it straight. Yeah, And
I'm them looking at you, of them across the table,
and when everyone's telling me you had a girlfriend, I
was like, well, obviously he does have a girlfriend because
he's not giving me anything. And can I just say
I was looking good. That was when I was in
my short dress face. I never the hair bad, platinum
(10:31):
blonde tail. I was wearing a red lippy, very tanned bond.
Diceands was my best friend back then. That's a ten.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I'd say, shits, Dany, that's what That's what fake tan does,
doesn't it What makes.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
You look like you're covered in fucking diarrhea?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Yeah? It does.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
No, it doesn't, you idiot, I probably got someone. Now
Do I look like I'm covered in ship?
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Especially because you never wash it off properly?
Speaker 1 (10:54):
No, I don't. You're right there. I let it disintegrate.
You should see between my cleavage right now. It's from
a hands three weeks. I look like leprosy. But I'm pregnant,
so that's fine. It's not fine, it's fine. Get the scrubber.
I don't have an exfoliator at the moment. Excuses a loafer. Sorry,
buy me one next time I go grocy. So yeah,
(11:14):
I'm like sitting watching across the table, watching you and
I'm like, clud the body language is so off. He
looks scary, like I don't want a bar or anything.
But then I saw you get up with your friend
and go towards the bar, and then I lappened to
be on the dance floor and then you came up
to me. You said you were sitting at them, and
then I went to the dance floor. Sorry should I
(11:37):
say I stepped with my left foot there? Right?
Speaker 2 (11:42):
We need to be more specific because you're.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Like boring, No one cares about the details. Okay, Well
you were.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
There, Yeah, you're and you were putting words in my mouth.
So that's what I'm saying, say it properly.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Okay, so fuck. We were all a dancel whatever, and
you came up to me and you were like, oh,
do you want to drink? And I was like, oh,
I've had a bit too much, Like no, But then
so I thought you took that. I was like, oh,
she's not interested. I was like, oh, but I'll still
come up to the bar with you. That was me
being like, you know, I want to entertain this. And
(12:20):
I remember that whole night. I was on cloud dog
because I was like, oh, you talked to me showing
general interest, and I just want to know if those
sparks were a life for you as well, or was
I just a quick conquest you were hoping.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
For no, actually for a drink. Yeah, so I was interested.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Yeah, but like interested, like like you're like, oh, she's beautiful,
I would like to call her my next girlfriend, or
like she'll be good for one, one and done, vibe.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
We don't think like that at the start anymore.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Oh you don't. Well that's good to know. Yeah, so
what were you? What were your thoughts?
Speaker 2 (12:53):
And you know the truth is we don't go. We'll
going on. I want to go look for my next husband,
my next husband or my next put.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Me. You didn't know, but I was like, I'd really
like the look of you. Yeah, I didn't know much
about the personality with those bloody demon I was looking
like they're going to kill me?
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Are you a resting bitch face?
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Nothing could be to yours?
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Mate?
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Mate? You do?
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Was I that night?
Speaker 2 (13:16):
You are all the time?
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Not back then?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Was I that night? I can't remember?
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Oh, there mustn't have left much of an impression on you.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
Ages ago now ten years, ten years?
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Holy shit? Yeah, I was eighteen? Yeah, Well what that
ages me. You were even older then.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
But that falls back to our first date. Where did
we go In our first date.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Hog's Breath Inkrenalla, And then we went to the movies
and watched that scary movie about incests. The brother was
doing the sister or something. Yeah. Actually on that note,
that episode we did called in the act about our
sex or when my brother caught us. Do you know
how many people on the TikTok commented saying they're brother
(14:05):
and sister. They look like siblings and like disgusted that
a brother and sister would have sex. I'm like, guys,
we're not brother and sister. Me and you, Yes, obviously
the fake Dan's fucking working mate.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
What brother and sister?
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Maybe it's that resting bitch racing both their eyes.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Probably, So I've.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Gone back because I'm hello, Peter, queen of this podcast.
I've gone back, like correcting it sank guys in no way,
shape or form, and are we related? But thank you?
So that means I look nice and tamped and you.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Yeah, that night we went out to the movies. Yeah,
your brother's friend was there, yes, yes, And I was.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
On the d ylcause I didn't tell anyone where I
was going. I was in my mum and dad because
when I did take the cheerleading job, my mum said
to me you can do this under one rule, you
are absolutely not to date a football player. And I said, yeah,
all good, mom, Oh I'm not into boys like that.
Six months later bo challenge accepted so and then yeah,
(15:15):
so I remember when we're at the movies, were waiting
to go in, and my brother's friend came up and goes,
oh is this and I made you tall? Not many
men look like you, and grona, lah that switch all
he stood out like it's all because very athletic build,
even back then. Yeah, yeah, so you're taller than the average.
(15:37):
And then what happens. I get home. It's like you're
seen out of the movie. It's all dark. Mum and
dad are in bed, turn the light on. Fucking brother
scares this year at me sitting on the catch and
who are you out with?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
And I said, StAst question yea, I.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
Said what and he goes, you're out with the football player.
Wreon't you? I said, no, Toby told me and I said,
how does Toby not was a football player? Said he
was tall, dark, looked, athletic, and apparently Toby described exactly
what you look like to the ability where Luke was
able to pinpoint you on the team list and he goes, yeah,
good player, got a good one there. He broke his
(16:15):
leg last year, but he's on the rebuild. I said, fucked,
did he really? And he's like yeah. Then he starts
going off on your stats. How many's tried you score
that season? He has, Yeah, I think you got to
win here? Played ling straight? Like can I? Actually I
want to address this with Luke because he actually has
been our biggest not not a lot of older brothers
(16:36):
would be keen to know that their youngest history dating
a football player, but he has been t Musselo from
day one, and there was a pivotal point in our
relationship that makes me fucking wet myself now. But when
we had our first oh it wasn't even we weren't
even official, but you went from texting me every single
day NonStop, to like this one weekend when you went
(16:58):
MIA on me and I am mate talk about gaslight
Actually I don't even know if you gas slped me,
but like it was like you love bombed me, and
then maybe I wasn't giving enough back. So you're like,
oh fuck, I'll give her a chicka her medicine, because
it's true. You were one of nine unsaved numbers my phone. Kidding.
(17:19):
I was saving for a reaction.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
That's all right, I know. I used to get around
back in the day.
Speaker 1 (17:24):
What the fucking light is? Shit? Missed out? Fucking I
go to Magic City every weekend. That was you. I
was Mother Teresa back in the day. Bitch, I saved
myself for you. No, So, so I remember I was
so anxious that weekend because I was like, oh my god.
In my head, I'm like, he doesn't like me anymore,
(17:45):
he's not interested. He's found someone else. And I'm like
it was like a mess inside making all these stories
up in my head. So Luke was like, what the
fuck's wrong with you? Because I was snapping at everyone.
That's a really bad personality trait when I'm in a
bad mood. Guess what, bitch, whoever else is in the
fucking rooms going down with me. I'm taking his all day.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Then, yeah, I just.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Said it's a bad person I trying to go on anywhere.
I still take that with me. So Luke was like,
let's just go to the beach. So he took me
for a drive in his car and we're sitting there
and he's like, what's wrong? And I just broke down
into and he does the best impersonation. He was like
(18:24):
what texting me? Crying like that? And he's like, what
the fuck's wrong with you? Just text you? And I
was like, I'm not fucking texting him. Man should text
with him first, Like so dumb looking back at it now,
but I was eighteen and then I was. I was like,
he doesn't like me, and he was like like, man,
Luke's like fucking can't down here, idiot. And we were
(18:45):
talking and I remember like, oh wait, being lifted off
my shoulders. I could vent to him about it, and
then it was like fucking witchcraft baby, who texted me?
You do?
Speaker 2 (18:54):
What about? Say?
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Hey, how's your weekend being?
Speaker 2 (18:57):
And I was like.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Crowing for want and I was like to look, oh
my god, lo clock he texted me and then Lukesle replied.
I was like no, no, let him wait. So yeah,
what what were you thinking that weekend? Why did it
take you so long to text me? I was just
giving back a bit of your medicine, so you were
(19:19):
so it was malicious.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Yep, because you'd message me, you'd message I'd message you,
and then you'd take about two hours to reply. And
I was like, what's wrong with this girl? May I
see you on your phone? Now? You have no problem
swiping up and down messaging this person, messaging that person.
So looking back now, you would have been on your phone.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
No excuse me. I worked in retail back then, eight
hours on my feet in a shop front. Come be
on your phone like I am today.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
Doesn't matter. And that's why I left it at that.
I said, all right, here you go?
Speaker 1 (19:49):
Really really did you used to get butterflies when you
saw my name pop up on your phone?
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Sometimes?
Speaker 1 (19:55):
Oh that's nice. See the sparks were there. It's crazy
when you look at your younger self what you used
to do when you were dating. Because I had this
thing where if you were to text me, i'd have
to I do want to look too keen where I
quickly text back? Now mate, I'm fucking sending your essay.
Like if you have a reply within two minutes, what
the fuck? Where are you get home now? Especially when
(20:16):
you're out at how far off are you? It's two am?
Where are you? Three am? Where are you. If you're
not home in a fucking ten minutes, I'm coming to
find you. I've got your location on how we laughed. Yeah,
and then so you can thank Luke for that because
he taught me off a ledge. I would have ended
(20:37):
it right there and then, mate, I observed better than that. Sure, No,
And then I hate I hate this story because it
literally gives me secondhand embarrassment and anxiety. But I think
Luke brought it up at our wedding speech. What is
it the night I brought you home? And we weren't
(20:57):
even dating, so no, we were, but we weren't official.
And I was like, I was so drunk at the time.
I was eighteen, living my best life. And you met
me out in Crinulla and like Fusions the nightclub iconic
nightclub back in the day, had clothes and you were like,
what are we doing now? And I wasn't ready to
sleep with you, so I was like, I was like, oh, well,
(21:20):
I don't know, like you could come back to my
house thinking that there was a safe environment, knowing that
my parents home and stuff. So U came.
Speaker 5 (21:30):
You came to my house and like two then in
the morning, were sitting down stairs in the back room,
the actual room that we actually got caught years later,
and me and you are sitting there and Luke comes home,
remember from a huge night he was and that was
the first time.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
He met you.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
And he's like trying to act all tough and cool.
And I remember, why, mate, I remember you were liked him.
Why you were a suit because he was in a suit.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
I met him. He's in a suit. He lives it.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Sleeps, and well he was I went to the racers.
Is that the racers ended at six pm? It's two thirty?
Because yeah, he's it, doesn't pick up me whatever. And
then and then I remember we were like just downstairs,
Luke goes to bed. We were just downstairs talking and
I hear my mom yellow Taylor, Taylor, do you have
(22:26):
fucking someone down there? And I was like, oh my god,
I didn't even think of like that. And then so
I've walked upstairs with my tail between my legs and
I'm like, oh, yeah, it's just my friend. Like he's
he's just here, like we're not doing anything. He's just
downstairs chilling. And she's like, you got to your fucking
bedroom now, So I got a bed, just sleep.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
He left me downstairs. He left me downstairs, and I'm
thinking she's brought me back to the house to do
what sit by myself in the sunroom.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
It is a nice room, that backroom. Yeah, and then
it gets worse. I forget my dad's a sheeft worker.
So Dad's alarm goes off. Twenty minutes later, he goes
downstairs to make breakfast and I'm sitting there.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
Jesus, I'm sitting in the sun room. He walks down.
He's probably seeing He probably thinks she's he's trying to
rob the out walks here, there's a black fellow in
the in his sun room. I just probably thinking, what what,
Who's this? And I'm and I'm sitting They're going, mate,
what has she done in me? She stitched me up,
literally And it was a big It was small talk.
I was so it was so am I said, I'm
(23:26):
just going to.
Speaker 6 (23:26):
Leave, yeah, and you just left? How embarrassing is that
of me? And I got into so much trouble the
next what happened. My mom was like, who the fuck
are you to bring a guy home? Like this isn't
just a hotel where you bring your mates in. There's
a brothel it's my mom's favorite line.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
It's not a brothel.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
I'm like, who's having sex in this house?
Speaker 2 (23:48):
My mom's She always says to us when we're younger,
it's not a hotel.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Oh yeah, my mom loves that too. You just come
and leave your staff. Yeah, yeah, we don't living for you.
Well you do, we do?
Speaker 2 (23:59):
What's it for? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Yeah, I was. I was so like off myself that night,
and I said to myself, Oh, if these days around
after this, Jesus, he's got to like you, because no
one would do that. In a few weeks later, picture
up from the airport. You just got home from Fiji.
No bags, you left them all in Fiji. And then
(24:25):
we're in traffic. It was New Year's Eve. We're in
traffic going out paramatt away and M four join me,
my girlfriend. I was like, is that it? That's the
big build up?
Speaker 2 (24:36):
How are you supposed to as?
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I don't know. I was expecting a bit more than that.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
Imagine these days with everyone on social media, you just
text it really well, you do a TikTok video. Yeah,
We're everything's so extravagant these days that people probably take
him here buying flowers. Shut up, No, one cares.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
What would you do exact same thing?
Speaker 2 (24:56):
I do the exact same thing in the car ask
that way, no one. So now I'm sociales in the
whole world. Who are you dating now? No one cares.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
We're back here every week.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
But it's Jesus.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
Give you material.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
That's my you know what, that's my material all the
way through this podcast. Wherever this podcast takes us.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
You know, this podcast is on socials. Yeah, I know,
it's so embarrassing for you.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
It's not because I told you I don't want to
see anything.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I don't care over this show.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
People say I don't care likes, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
I don't care about these comments anymore. I'm done. I'm
just going to start chuning you out. Well yeah, well
we've come. We've come a long way, mate. So that
was out all started people and they wanted to know
that's how we met. And we're at work when I
was at work cheerleading, when you were in the sheds
(25:50):
twenty you're in the twenties back then, ye don't you
think it was cute that you'd get butterflies when you
cross me in the sheds?
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Really?
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Cool? I wasn't thinking of but I was thinking about
playing foot.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Well, can I just say, well, I was thinking about
his you, mate, I'm going to go cheer my fucking
ass off.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
For him shaking your pomp pomps.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
No, we weren't even cheering for your team. We were
doing first grade. So now i'd be cheering for you
if I'm still a cheerleader.
Speaker 2 (26:18):
Yeah, what's the point of cheerleaders?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (26:22):
That's what I'm asking. What's the point Yeah, dancing? You
can't tell me right, I'm not being disrespectful. I'm trying
to be like I want to say this the nicest
way possible. Right.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
That means it's going to be bad.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
When people go and buy tickets to a game, they
go to watch the team play, right. Yeah, it doesn't
sound the ticket. Here's your ticket to the chair.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
It's part of the game day entertainment.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
Stop trying to brush the fight.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
I don't want to go there. I'm done. We get it.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Well, this is what I'm saying. No one cares about him.
Check a few pomp poms. Wave your head left to right.
Guess what, I don't care. No one cares. Get out
the waist so we can play. Move off the field
so we can run the ball. How about that?
Speaker 1 (27:06):
No one cares about you fucking running the balls. Come
so you're on the wing beach. People barely see you. Okay,
so shut up. You're one step away from the actual cheerleaders.
You're the closest player. Keep becoming a cheerleader on the side.
Shut up that sort of the world. No fucking on
(27:26):
your line in here. I'm done, I'm done. You can
fuck off.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
I love it. I love it so obviously when you're
with someone for so long. We've been together next years,
ten years. We haven't been married for long, only two years. Yeah,
(27:51):
but it feels like we have. Someone took a bit longer,
but it feels like we have. You still have these
little things, this little extra pish you off about the
person that you love. Agreed, you know one of mine
is with you?
Speaker 1 (28:02):
Oh, here we go.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Yeah, it's the dishwasher.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
How so I know the dishwasher. We have a nice one,
so after you use it and normally drives up everything
in there, right, But if you put containers in there,
your lunchbox containers, it doesn't dry the lunchbox containers up.
There's not there's not like a little person in there
walking around with a with a towel hand dry and
the lunch boxes in there.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
There's little person.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
There's when I unload the dishwasher, I do that. I
do that.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Yeah, because you have nowhere else better? No me, baby,
I've got shit on my side.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
No, it's because you're dirty. So what you know, listen, listen,
let me finish, Let me finish. And this is what
you do. This is what Taylor does. Listeners. She gets
the lunch boxes, well, there's a little bit of water
in there still, and just puts it straight in the cupboard.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
That's fine, that's not fine.
Speaker 6 (28:54):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
You know what water, you know what can go from
that mold? Mold, and we put food in there. You
don't do that.
Speaker 4 (29:00):
But you know what, he's science and that's my little
one of my little ex dries still, walle it's in
the cupboard. It doesn't doesn't stop drying, doesn't say oxygen.
You're out now, because we're in the cupboard.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
A little bit of water, not not not not puddles.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
Of it, puddles and it's droplets at the most.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
I've opened the cupboard up and I've seen in.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
There, what a flood keets you in the face, literally,
get fuck.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
I'm serious, And that's one of my ex I don't want.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
To go any your ex. One of my ex is
when we go out to somewhere right. We went to
the baby ex the other day and mate, I didn't
have one vendor bother me. They just see me have
face and they're not even going to bother your fucking
Everyone comes to you because you look so friendly and
like open, and they say that no, but they know
(29:53):
that because they know all he would go, we'll get
you fucking bypointless ship. And then I have to look
like the beach when you're like, oh, here's the mom here, mummy,
do you want something? No, we're fine, we don't need that.
Sorry you just said yes.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
You just said to me earlier on that when you
first farnd me, are like, I had a scary face.
Here you do. So all these people coming up saying
I look friendly.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Now, No, it's scary and I want to spend money.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
No, it's not very that's been more interested that we're
having twins. You don't even care. Ah, So we walked
through there. If I didn't buy you that strap, that
belt strap, how are you going to feed the girls.
How are you going to feed them to It's.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Called pillows, which we already own. They're just on the couch.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
One do you want to do the He's going to
help me do that when I'm not home and I'm
at training. You can't have two girls. Louis grabbed the pillows.
You can't grab the pillows.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Hello, women are one to women. We get shipped down
like that. Your mom had this fucking pillow in Fiji
when she raised you and four your three other brothers.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
No, so that was twenty eight years ago, my love time, she.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Still got the job done. Look at you, you bloody healthy.
It's fine.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Times have changed and you need that. So we've got
that right. We needed to get a bathtub. We got
the bathtub, which is we have a shower stand with
them in the shower. I'm just trying to save us
money before she hits the fan later. You just don't
even think with that part of your brain. You're you
(31:17):
whatever exactly whatever. People say you need this.
Speaker 1 (31:20):
You need this, You're like, oh, yeah, you don't need it.
Speaker 2 (31:23):
What did we buy?
Speaker 1 (31:25):
You just said it?
Speaker 2 (31:26):
What did we buy that? People told me to buy
the pillow the bathtub because I was having a yarn
with her, and she said, this is what I'll be
perfect for your wife.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Of course she's gonna say that, she's not gonna stay. Oh,
don't worry, keep walking. This is shit. Of course she
wants your money.
Speaker 2 (31:41):
But I see, Marvin, she had one of those as well,
and she used.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
It your sister in law. Yes, yeah, well cool, great,
I could just borrow hers. Then that's not for tweens.
You're a tight ass. Yeah I am? I am? Is
that another one in your egs? Y you'll say me
when I'm not getting paid on the two need to
leave me?
Speaker 2 (32:01):
But actually is on of my ex is it is
that you.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Your open arms when it comes to budgets.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Or budgets it's important. If it's important, we've got to
get it right. There are kids on away coming.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
We can we invest in a dishwasher that fucking dries containers.
Then we can't because that seems like a good good
news about money.
Speaker 2 (32:23):
There's no there's no little person that gets in there
that can do that. Do it yourself.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
Yes, I'm not going to be that little person either.
I don't care about a little water job. But in
a container that just has his food in the fucking freezer.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
No, the bigger one.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
No, I don't care about that either. I'm the other
one that eats tell a container. So do you care
if I'm eating mold?
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Because you want me to cop that? Because you're dirty.
That's why you dirty. I need to take shortcuts. Those
are my.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Ex It's called being time effiicient. I wish I had
the luxury of you and taking my time with all
these little activities. I don't.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
It's not taking the time. The way you do one
thing is the way you do everything. That's how it is.
That's how life is, all right, Taylor. If it was
about the podcast, you'd bend over backwards for it. But
because it's the dishwasher, you don't want.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
To touch it. I'm going to ask Ourheart Radio if
we can go back to exploring other opportunities.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
This isn't a work because you don't like the truth,
and sometimes the truth hurts.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
Like I want to talk to Adam producer. See I said,
I didn't sign up for a weekly doctor phel fucking
session with my husband. I just want a lighthearted beans.
Speaker 2 (33:30):
Well, sometimes you don't like the truth, the truth hurts.
Just copy your l's take it. Because it's the truth.
Speaker 1 (33:35):
Can you please promise me you're not going to be
this annoying with the daughters, because I don't deserve will be.
I'm not if on.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Social media like this. Hey guys, it's me again. They're
not doing that.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Don't talk about our daughter's like that. If they want
to get it out of social media, be like.
Speaker 3 (33:55):
Hey, guys, we are they're not doing that.
Speaker 1 (33:59):
I'm going to be a blogger with the two gals.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
I'm gonna gets fine, but they're not doing it.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Yeah, they're going to be in my videos.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Well guess what they're gonna know how to do? Make
their bed properly like you don't know, Dry the dishes
and just wash it properly like you don't do. I'll
be teaching them and all the little things. Do it properly.
When you get up in the morning, make your bed
before you go to bed, brush your teeth when you
wake up in the morning, brush your teeth.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
I can't stand you brush your hair. Are you insinuating
that I don't do all of your bus.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
I'm no, I'm just saying that's how parent my kids.
I will.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
I don't wash my teeth at night. I don't believe
in it dirty. I don't, but I'm going to wake
up and wash it in the morning.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
That's the point. By so everything you've eaten for dinner
or whatever you have for dessert, SIT's in your mouth
or a night.
Speaker 1 (34:47):
Pluk ros, you're going to wash it in the morning,
doesn't matter. What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
That's what I mean. I'm not a Coldgate scientist. I
can't tell you what.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
You shouldn't talk on the matter then, but that's the
way it should. I'm gonna get one of these days,
I'm going to get an expert on this podcast to
ask if it if it does anything, it does?
Speaker 2 (35:06):
I reckon you were cool.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
You keep wasting your time because guess what, while you're
in there doing your whole that's you washing your teeth.
You fucking make yourself gag that that long with five minutes,
I have to go to bed you So while you're
doing that, I guess I'm already onto my second dream.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
You're not. You're on your phone again, stro up and
down tiktoks.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Yeah, because I struggled to fall asleep when you're not
next to me. AnyWho?
Speaker 2 (35:35):
That was that was a few thank you the one.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
So I'm you threw it, and.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
I've got more in my back pocket. Of course, all.
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Right, are you clever? Because guess so, I've got plenty
more to come to, plenty more to come on that note, yeah,
so will while why I want to talk about the subject.
I've got a beauty up my sleeve, mate, not us,
thank you for once. I think we've just gotten rid
of all ours out there, but my mom and Dad.
(36:05):
So it's a nightly routine that I facetimed them all
their FaceTime me because they live in Sydney, so whatever
face time we can get with each other is good.
So I just stopped on the phone with them the
other day when you were in Sydney, and it was
just Mom who answered, which is weird because normally Dad's
always wherever Sueye is. He's two steps behind. They say
(36:30):
they ate each other, but god, they could not live
without each other. They had tied at the hip, those two.
And so I was just Mom and I'm talking to
her and I'm sensing like something's a bit off, and
then I'm like, oh, he's Dad, and she's like he's
in the kitchen. I was like, oh yeah, cool, Like
is everything okay? She's like, and that's that's rare for
(36:50):
my mom to be silent. She's like me, like we
talk about every day, and I'm like, oh, yeah, what's
wrong And she's like, me and your father aren't talking
at the moment, I said, Oh, what's happened? And so
he's the story. It's a fucking classic. It's one of
my favorite Lombardy stories evers. So, uh, they've just went
(37:11):
and got some new flooring done upseas, so my mom
had to move all the furniture downstairs. And she's got
this mirror that she's decided. Now that I've brought that down,
it kind of looks quite good on this war. So
she's hung this mirror on the wall. The wall is
part of the lounge room, but it also shares a
(37:34):
sharing war with the study. So if you see, if
you sit on the couch now and you can use
that mirror to see everything my dad's doing in the
commar And if you know my dad's history, which I've
mentioned it a few times, my dad's full time job
has been in that study. He loves his iTunes library,
(37:55):
he loves his music, that's his hobbies. He loves live streaming,
train rides from Land to Rome. He's a live cam
fanatic webcam fanatic. Sorry, we both me and him enjoy
watching Mount Everest live streams. He's always in there, blessed
men of the world when it comes to the Internet.
So my mom's just innocently on the couch watching an
(38:17):
episode of The Sopranos, a great show. It's about an
Italian family involved in the mafia. See a lot of
similarities in that show with my family, obviously, not the
drugs and corruption, but just angry Italian people exactly like
they just goes zero to one hundred, everything's a big deal.
So she's watching Tony Soprano, which is the main character,
(38:39):
and he's winching about it. The chef, the chef, and
he's saying things like he's always miserable, he complains about everything.
He's never happy about anything. Rah rah run, my mom'st
my mom's gona sounds familiar, and she catches my dad
in the mirror. Go like this like that, just like
(39:00):
that too to my mom. So he flicks the bird
at her. He puts the rude finger up and she
pounces and goes, I saw that inch sucked in. I
got you. I saw that He he jumped so fast
off his computer, cheers, what did you see, Jess? You
just fucking sucked the finger up at me and say no,
I didn't sure. I swear to god, I do know.
I sweat have got it in. I went like this,
(39:21):
I went like this, I put my glasses down. There
was a fly in my nes used every excuse under
the sun, and she's gone, fuck you, I saw everything.
He got caught out, sucked in. And then so they're
not talking. So when she's telling me this story on FaceTime,
I'm like, wait, mom, but mate, I've been at your hair.
Else when Dad's turned around, if you've done the finger
(39:42):
till they find his back Jess, he at least is
stupid to realize his son. But even while she's retelling
me this soy on face. So my dad's pounced from
the kitchen, go, oh, you're not telling Taylor about it.
I swear to god, I didn't stick the figure. But
your mom, I was going like this with my glasses,
(40:02):
all this stuff, and he's just on message damage control
right now.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
And then I could imagine what he like, what was
going through his mind as well when she's seen it?
Did he know that she put the mirror there.
Speaker 1 (40:14):
Yeah, but he wouldn't have thought or he's surveillance in me.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
I think she might be onto something new.
Speaker 1 (40:21):
Yeah, So they're going to come to New Zealand in
a few weeks to visit us. So I want to
get them on the podcast because I want to get
dad's side of the story, and then her mom started
the story, and that we could judge who's telling the truth.
I'm gonna say it's not looking too good for and
knowing his previous experience with behavior like that, so.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
When that gets nervous too, and end gets nervous, he
always rubbed his eyebrows.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
Does He's a nervous twitch.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
So if we get him on the podcast and.
Speaker 7 (40:53):
He rubbed his eyebrows and he was wrong, he's like,
so I see waters at the Lombardy house at the moment,
So it was a weird face time.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
They're fine now until we bring it up on this
week's episode and then they're listening to that fucking the
dinner and have you have you ever flipped flipped? Is
that flipped the bird? Flip the bird of me?
Speaker 2 (41:17):
Never?
Speaker 1 (41:18):
Never? No, you were just doing as joking A.
Speaker 2 (41:22):
Yeah, like my mouth gestures to.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
You, Oh, Yeah, well's immature, isn't it.
Speaker 2 (41:28):
You're talking ship and here talking.
Speaker 1 (41:34):
What can I just tell you when you went off
for me.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
Drive the lunchboxes property?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
Yeah? What am I doing behind your back when you
talking to that? I think I've ever had the need
to deal with you because I just tell you it's
your face. That's what needs to do to get the
courage to go to shut up. Anyways, I think that's enough. Okay, bye,
(41:59):
I see you Next week
Speaker 6 (42:03):
Is down.
This is an iHeart Radio New Zealand podcast. We're back
here every week. But it's Jesus give you material.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Because when I come home there's leftover room. No, there
isn't sit there.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
You're a fucking liar. Yeah, you're one step away from
the actual cheerleaders. You're the closest player. Keep coming a cheerleader.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
On the SIDELO. Hey guys, you are back again for
another episode, bringing the energy with them one Toys Welcome.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
Welcome into our spare bedroom. That's what this is.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
We actually filmed in our spare bedroom at home.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
No fancy studio here.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
No fancy allow not yet anyway.
Speaker 1 (00:52):
Yeah, watch out, Joe Rogan. We're fucking coming for your setup, mate,
gum knocking bitch, get out. No, I wouldn't want to
be on a podcast with him. Actually I never listened.
Have you listened to his stuff?
Speaker 2 (01:08):
No?
Speaker 1 (01:08):
Yeah, come be bothered. No, I haven't seen a few
weird clips are where he gets high.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
But he's good. He's good at what he does, is
he Yeah? Really? You know, well, because he's a commentator
for the UFC, so.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
That makes him qualify to do a podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, he speaks very well. Oh okay, yeah, true, So
that's why, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
True, one mate? Can can I just say you look good?
You've got a haircut, thank you. You smell really nice too.
That's the big occasion.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Because we're filming our podcast. Okay, and another week you
told me that I looked ugly.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Wow's what it works into mouths.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Now, I'm just using your techniques.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
I didn't say you look ugly, though. I would never
say that because I don't think that. I think you're gorgeous.
I think you're a beautiful specimen, which is why I
chose you to procreate with.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Well, you said something down the lines of I was
looking scruffy, which.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
To me look like you had dropped the ball a bit.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Which so you're pretty much saying, I look.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
What can I just say? You're the first person to
point out when I haven't shaved my legs, You're the
first person to point out when I've got shit on
my face, and you're the first person to point out
on my hand looks like shit. So how does it
feel to get a bit of your own medicine?
Speaker 2 (02:15):
And you know what I've got out of this little
start here is that we're both use it a bit
of our own techniques.
Speaker 1 (02:21):
We are that of a learning yeah right. AnyWho, you
haven't been home for a while, yes, but now it's
lovely to have you back home. So when you do
come home, right, yes? Is there anything that you love
about being home? Doesn't have to be me now, but
(02:43):
like you know, coming back to your own house.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I love coming home to a clean house.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Yeah, that's all that happens often. That's important every time
I assume that that's what you'd come home to.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Yeah, but I feel coming back home to you and
louis really nice.
Speaker 1 (02:59):
Yeah, Jesus, that hope.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
So we obviously have no kids yet, so when you
come home and see you guys, it's it's always a
nice surprise.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Yep, surprise. And is there anything about when you come
home that I do that pisces you off?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Yes? We spoke about this.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
Did we go? Where was it? I can remember?
Speaker 2 (03:22):
So in our house we have three toilets. The one
downstairs what are you talking? The one downstairs is supposed
to be off use. It's only supposed to be used
for number onesn't.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
How do you not doing this? How do you know
I'm using the toilet downstairs for that?
Speaker 2 (03:39):
When you're not even fucking here because when I come
home there's leftover room. No there is, but don't sit there,
a fucking liar. We can go down right now and
we've got Pumps is here. Pumps can come down with
us and I'll show him right now. So if you
want to carry on, I can go down and show
him right now. Because downstairs, don't hang on toilet. It
(04:01):
doesn't matter. It's downstairs, you do we agree with we moved,
didn't it's downstairs.
Speaker 1 (04:06):
Who cares where the fuck it is? It's a fucking toilet.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
See, it doesn't matter you said to me, We're not
using that toil of for number twos, I'll come home
remnants everywhere.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
You want to know the real reason why use that
fucking toilet? Because it's close to the TV. And when
I'm watching your games, I get the fucking runs because
that's how fucking nervous I'm watching your team this season. Okay,
so forgive me. I can't fucking hold it together for
eighty minutes. Okay, fuck you. I won't be judge for
(04:36):
where I go to the toilet.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Am I out? This is a thing.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
This fucking when you when you fucking bomb Japan in
every single one of our fucking toilets in the house
and go to come through. You mate, you need to
go see your fucking doctor because what I smelled when
you got home the other day.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
But that's what happens, because when I come home and
we eat on the weekend, we eat not junk food,
but we'd like to let LOOSEI bit, and then it
all comes out pizza.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
So I understand why you're not going to the toilet downstairs,
But me, I'm not like that. This is really easy
when you're away. I'm on starvation mode.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
It shouldn't even be an issue because we spoke about it.
Would have moved in and you said to me mass
the bottom toiler we don't use for number two. You
said it to me.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Sometimes I just say ship to make you happy, and
then I fucking do it behind your back. You should
know this mine. Now you just piss me off. So
I just go okay, and in my head, I'm gone,
fuck me. This guy's unreal.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
You know what? You know what like you know what?
The The funny thing is, you could get away with
this if you just took the scrubble from the middle
level and took it scrub Well, that's there, you would
have been out of it. That you would have been
out of it. You would have got.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
I'm not carrying the doorlet scrubber down.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You would have got, mate, I wouldn't even know you
used it for the number twos if you just took
the scrubble down, the scrub your ship.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
I'm not living in a cult. Okay, this feels like
I'm under cult leadership. I mean a fucking I'm being
held against my will in this house. I can't even
pick what toilet to ship in.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
That's not a cult. If you agreed on the terms.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Fuck you and your fucking thirst, and I'll keep going
and do a poo in that room until I'm fucking
still getting the runs watching you play make me sick.
And also when we have visitors, because that is the
main toilet that visitors use. Are you literally going to
be like, oh, you can't do a ship down here,
you have so go upstairs.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
All our visitors know to use the toilet on that.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
I tell Casey to go use that toilet. She gets
the runs too when she watches Adam play, So mate,
that toilet's getting a fucking work out. My god, she's
gonna die hearing this. She's gonna love it because me
and her and that this is gonna sound so fucking
(06:59):
we by care. Me and her are that close. We
go to the toilet with the door open so she
can watch the game as well.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
This is disgusting.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
This is what we gonna do.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
The kitchen is right there. The kitchen's they I.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
Know what we're cooking for each other too. She makes
a beautiful pasta bake in your kitchen. And the sausage dogs.
They have a sausage dog as well, called Reggie. That's
our sausage dog, Louie's best friend. They're fucking running a
mark in and out of the toilet.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
That's fine. The dogs are running the mark. And guess
what all you past? The bake. Whatever she makes has
ship remnants go on floating around. You shut me the door.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
I don't think too much into this germs and so
I'm a germophobe. I don't care. Am I healthy? I'm
actually fucking thriving. So if I'm eating shit all day,
it must be working fair energy. That's good glucose, they say,
ask a GP. So a lot of people have been
(08:06):
wondering how we actually met.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Who's been wondering, Well, a lot of people. Actually, so
you're making shit up again.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
I'm not. I'm actually not. I'm actually not.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
No one cared, No people do care.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
And it's a fun story, all right, going there. Yeah, So,
like we we met because I worked at the club
used to play for and I was a cheerleader. You
were playing for the twenties at the time, and I
just want to get your perspective on how things unraveled
because like, in my head, females a lot of us
(08:41):
females romanticize the miniscule moments romanticized, Yes, like we make
it bigger in our head than what it was. And
I just liked to know of you who felt the
same vibes as me. So, like the initial contact, like
I knew you from around to the club, but like
the initial contact was at Cargo Bar in Sydney, Right,
(09:02):
So we're both out for a friend's birthday and we
were all out and then you you came through, and
everyone was telling me not to speak to you because
you had a girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
I didn't.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Yeah, well they were lying because they were obviously jealous
that we were hitting it off and they wanted to
have a go at you first. Okay, that ended. Hey,
and I remember I remember this pivotal moment from that
night because I was very You're very standoffish. You come
at me for having resting bitch face. You look like
(09:34):
you were ready to fucking kill someone that night.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
You know what, someone's no one said see me, but
we're winning in Sydney last week and you're just getting
a coffee.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
And then this I don't know if it was a fan,
but he's walking up, but he's obviously he's seen us
having a coffee at a cafe and he's saying, oh, yeah,
I know you boys, and he pointed them in eas
all You're scary really yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
Yeah you did? You give off those vibes. You've got
these eyes that always look like you're like judging people.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
I'm not judging, but I'm ready to go. That's what
I'm ready go with. Do what if we're going to
have a crack, we're going to throw it down.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
No one, lets not throw it down with you, especially men.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Shut it on you.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I'm just trying to get a free drink out of you.
I'm not fucking trying to run it straight. Yeah, And
I'm them looking at you, of them across the table,
and when everyone's telling me you had a girlfriend, I
was like, well, obviously he does have a girlfriend because
he's not giving me anything. And can I just say
I was looking good. That was when I was in
my short dress face. I never the hair bad, platinum
(10:31):
blonde tail. I was wearing a red lippy, very tanned bond.
Diceands was my best friend back then. That's a ten.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
I'd say, shits, Dany, that's what That's what fake tan does,
doesn't it What makes.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
You look like you're covered in fucking diarrhea?
Speaker 2 (10:46):
Yeah? It does.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
No, it doesn't, you idiot, I probably got someone. Now
Do I look like I'm covered in ship?
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Especially because you never wash it off properly?
Speaker 1 (10:54):
No, I don't. You're right there. I let it disintegrate.
You should see between my cleavage right now. It's from
a hands three weeks. I look like leprosy. But I'm pregnant,
so that's fine. It's not fine, it's fine. Get the scrubber.
I don't have an exfoliator at the moment. Excuses a loafer. Sorry,
buy me one next time I go grocy. So yeah,
(11:14):
I'm like sitting watching across the table, watching you and
I'm like, clud the body language is so off. He
looks scary, like I don't want a bar or anything.
But then I saw you get up with your friend
and go towards the bar, and then I lappened to
be on the dance floor and then you came up
to me. You said you were sitting at them, and
then I went to the dance floor. Sorry should I
(11:37):
say I stepped with my left foot there? Right?
Speaker 2 (11:42):
We need to be more specific because you're.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Like boring, No one cares about the details. Okay, Well
you were.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
There, Yeah, you're and you were putting words in my mouth.
So that's what I'm saying, say it properly.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Okay, so fuck. We were all a dancel whatever, and
you came up to me and you were like, oh,
do you want to drink? And I was like, oh,
I've had a bit too much, Like no, But then
so I thought you took that. I was like, oh,
she's not interested. I was like, oh, but I'll still
come up to the bar with you. That was me
being like, you know, I want to entertain this. And
(12:20):
I remember that whole night. I was on cloud dog
because I was like, oh, you talked to me showing
general interest, and I just want to know if those
sparks were a life for you as well, or was
I just a quick conquest you were hoping.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
For no, actually for a drink. Yeah, so I was interested.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Yeah, but like interested, like like you're like, oh, she's beautiful,
I would like to call her my next girlfriend, or
like she'll be good for one, one and done, vibe.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
We don't think like that at the start anymore.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Oh you don't. Well that's good to know. Yeah, so
what were you? What were your thoughts?
Speaker 2 (12:53):
And you know the truth is we don't go. We'll
going on. I want to go look for my next husband,
my next husband or my next put.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Me. You didn't know, but I was like, I'd really
like the look of you. Yeah, I didn't know much
about the personality with those bloody demon I was looking
like they're going to kill me?
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Are you a resting bitch face?
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Nothing could be to yours?
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Mate?
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Mate? You do?
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Was I that night?
Speaker 2 (13:16):
You are all the time?
Speaker 1 (13:17):
Not back then?
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Was I that night? I can't remember?
Speaker 1 (13:22):
Oh, there mustn't have left much of an impression on you.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
Ages ago now ten years, ten years?
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Holy shit? Yeah, I was eighteen? Yeah, Well what that
ages me. You were even older then.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
But that falls back to our first date. Where did
we go In our first date.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Hog's Breath Inkrenalla, And then we went to the movies
and watched that scary movie about incests. The brother was
doing the sister or something. Yeah. Actually on that note,
that episode we did called in the act about our
sex or when my brother caught us. Do you know
how many people on the TikTok commented saying they're brother
(14:05):
and sister. They look like siblings and like disgusted that
a brother and sister would have sex. I'm like, guys,
we're not brother and sister. Me and you, Yes, obviously
the fake Dan's fucking working mate.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
What brother and sister?
Speaker 1 (14:21):
Maybe it's that resting bitch racing both their eyes.
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Probably, So I've.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Gone back because I'm hello, Peter, queen of this podcast.
I've gone back, like correcting it sank guys in no way,
shape or form, and are we related? But thank you?
So that means I look nice and tamped and you.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
Yeah, that night we went out to the movies. Yeah,
your brother's friend was there, yes, yes, And I was.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
On the d ylcause I didn't tell anyone where I
was going. I was in my mum and dad because
when I did take the cheerleading job, my mum said
to me you can do this under one rule, you
are absolutely not to date a football player. And I said, yeah,
all good, mom, Oh I'm not into boys like that.
Six months later bo challenge accepted so and then yeah,
(15:15):
so I remember when we're at the movies, were waiting
to go in, and my brother's friend came up and goes,
oh is this and I made you tall? Not many
men look like you, and grona, lah that switch all
he stood out like it's all because very athletic build,
even back then. Yeah, yeah, so you're taller than the average.
(15:37):
And then what happens. I get home. It's like you're
seen out of the movie. It's all dark. Mum and
dad are in bed, turn the light on. Fucking brother
scares this year at me sitting on the catch and
who are you out with?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
And I said, StAst question yea, I.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
Said what and he goes, you're out with the football player.
Wreon't you? I said, no, Toby told me and I said,
how does Toby not was a football player? Said he
was tall, dark, looked, athletic, and apparently Toby described exactly
what you look like to the ability where Luke was
able to pinpoint you on the team list and he goes, yeah,
good player, got a good one there. He broke his
(16:15):
leg last year, but he's on the rebuild. I said, fucked,
did he really? And he's like yeah. Then he starts
going off on your stats. How many's tried you score
that season? He has, Yeah, I think you got to
win here? Played ling straight? Like can I? Actually I
want to address this with Luke because he actually has
been our biggest not not a lot of older brothers
(16:36):
would be keen to know that their youngest history dating
a football player, but he has been t Musselo from
day one, and there was a pivotal point in our
relationship that makes me fucking wet myself now. But when
we had our first oh it wasn't even we weren't
even official, but you went from texting me every single
day NonStop, to like this one weekend when you went
(16:58):
MIA on me and I am mate talk about gaslight
Actually I don't even know if you gas slped me,
but like it was like you love bombed me, and
then maybe I wasn't giving enough back. So you're like,
oh fuck, I'll give her a chicka her medicine, because
it's true. You were one of nine unsaved numbers my phone. Kidding.
(17:19):
I was saving for a reaction.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
That's all right, I know. I used to get around
back in the day.
Speaker 1 (17:24):
What the fucking light is? Shit? Missed out? Fucking I
go to Magic City every weekend. That was you. I
was Mother Teresa back in the day. Bitch, I saved
myself for you. No, So, so I remember I was
so anxious that weekend because I was like, oh my god.
In my head, I'm like, he doesn't like me anymore,
(17:45):
he's not interested. He's found someone else. And I'm like
it was like a mess inside making all these stories
up in my head. So Luke was like, what the
fuck's wrong with you? Because I was snapping at everyone.
That's a really bad personality trait when I'm in a
bad mood. Guess what, bitch, whoever else is in the
fucking rooms going down with me. I'm taking his all day.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Then, yeah, I just.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Said it's a bad person I trying to go on anywhere.
I still take that with me. So Luke was like,
let's just go to the beach. So he took me
for a drive in his car and we're sitting there
and he's like, what's wrong? And I just broke down
into and he does the best impersonation. He was like
(18:24):
what texting me? Crying like that? And he's like, what
the fuck's wrong with you? Just text you? And I
was like, I'm not fucking texting him. Man should text
with him first, Like so dumb looking back at it now,
but I was eighteen and then I was. I was like,
he doesn't like me, and he was like like, man,
Luke's like fucking can't down here, idiot. And we were
(18:45):
talking and I remember like, oh wait, being lifted off
my shoulders. I could vent to him about it, and
then it was like fucking witchcraft baby, who texted me?
You do?
Speaker 2 (18:54):
What about? Say?
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Hey, how's your weekend being?
Speaker 2 (18:57):
And I was like.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Crowing for want and I was like to look, oh
my god, lo clock he texted me and then Lukesle replied.
I was like no, no, let him wait. So yeah,
what what were you thinking that weekend? Why did it
take you so long to text me? I was just
giving back a bit of your medicine, so you were
(19:19):
so it was malicious.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Yep, because you'd message me, you'd message I'd message you,
and then you'd take about two hours to reply. And
I was like, what's wrong with this girl? May I
see you on your phone? Now? You have no problem
swiping up and down messaging this person, messaging that person.
So looking back now, you would have been on your phone.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
No excuse me. I worked in retail back then, eight
hours on my feet in a shop front. Come be
on your phone like I am today.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
Doesn't matter. And that's why I left it at that.
I said, all right, here you go?
Speaker 1 (19:49):
Really really did you used to get butterflies when you
saw my name pop up on your phone?
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Sometimes?
Speaker 1 (19:55):
Oh that's nice. See the sparks were there. It's crazy
when you look at your younger self what you used
to do when you were dating. Because I had this
thing where if you were to text me, i'd have
to I do want to look too keen where I
quickly text back? Now mate, I'm fucking sending your essay.
Like if you have a reply within two minutes, what
the fuck? Where are you get home now? Especially when
(20:16):
you're out at how far off are you? It's two am?
Where are you? Three am? Where are you. If you're
not home in a fucking ten minutes, I'm coming to
find you. I've got your location on how we laughed. Yeah,
and then so you can thank Luke for that because
he taught me off a ledge. I would have ended
(20:37):
it right there and then, mate, I observed better than that. Sure, No,
And then I hate I hate this story because it
literally gives me secondhand embarrassment and anxiety. But I think
Luke brought it up at our wedding speech. What is
it the night I brought you home? And we weren't
(20:57):
even dating, so no, we were, but we weren't official.
And I was like, I was so drunk at the time.
I was eighteen, living my best life. And you met
me out in Crinulla and like Fusions the nightclub iconic
nightclub back in the day, had clothes and you were like,
what are we doing now? And I wasn't ready to
sleep with you, so I was like, I was like, oh, well,
(21:20):
I don't know, like you could come back to my
house thinking that there was a safe environment, knowing that
my parents home and stuff. So U came.
Speaker 5 (21:30):
You came to my house and like two then in
the morning, were sitting down stairs in the back room,
the actual room that we actually got caught years later,
and me and you are sitting there and Luke comes home,
remember from a huge night he was and that was
the first time.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
He met you.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
And he's like trying to act all tough and cool.
And I remember, why, mate, I remember you were liked him.
Why you were a suit because he was in a suit.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
I met him. He's in a suit. He lives it.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Sleeps, and well he was I went to the racers.
Is that the racers ended at six pm? It's two thirty?
Because yeah, he's it, doesn't pick up me whatever. And
then and then I remember we were like just downstairs,
Luke goes to bed. We were just downstairs talking and
I hear my mom yellow Taylor, Taylor, do you have
(22:26):
fucking someone down there? And I was like, oh my god,
I didn't even think of like that. And then so
I've walked upstairs with my tail between my legs and
I'm like, oh, yeah, it's just my friend. Like he's
he's just here, like we're not doing anything. He's just
downstairs chilling. And she's like, you got to your fucking
bedroom now, So I got a bed, just sleep.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
He left me downstairs. He left me downstairs, and I'm
thinking she's brought me back to the house to do
what sit by myself in the sunroom.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
It is a nice room, that backroom. Yeah, and then
it gets worse. I forget my dad's a sheeft worker.
So Dad's alarm goes off. Twenty minutes later, he goes
downstairs to make breakfast and I'm sitting there.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
Jesus, I'm sitting in the sun room. He walks down.
He's probably seeing He probably thinks she's he's trying to
rob the out walks here, there's a black fellow in
the in his sun room. I just probably thinking, what what,
Who's this? And I'm and I'm sitting They're going, mate,
what has she done in me? She stitched me up,
literally And it was a big It was small talk.
I was so it was so am I said, I'm
(23:26):
just going to.
Speaker 6 (23:26):
Leave, yeah, and you just left? How embarrassing is that
of me? And I got into so much trouble the
next what happened. My mom was like, who the fuck
are you to bring a guy home? Like this isn't
just a hotel where you bring your mates in. There's
a brothel it's my mom's favorite line.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
It's not a brothel.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
I'm like, who's having sex in this house?
Speaker 2 (23:48):
My mom's She always says to us when we're younger,
it's not a hotel.
Speaker 1 (23:51):
Oh yeah, my mom loves that too. You just come
and leave your staff. Yeah, yeah, we don't living for you.
Well you do, we do?
Speaker 2 (23:59):
What's it for? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Yeah, I was. I was so like off myself that night,
and I said to myself, Oh, if these days around
after this, Jesus, he's got to like you, because no
one would do that. In a few weeks later, picture
up from the airport. You just got home from Fiji.
No bags, you left them all in Fiji. And then
(24:25):
we're in traffic. It was New Year's Eve. We're in
traffic going out paramatt away and M four join me,
my girlfriend. I was like, is that it? That's the
big build up?
Speaker 2 (24:36):
How are you supposed to as?
Speaker 1 (24:37):
I don't know. I was expecting a bit more than that.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
Imagine these days with everyone on social media, you just
text it really well, you do a TikTok video. Yeah,
We're everything's so extravagant these days that people probably take
him here buying flowers. Shut up, No, one cares.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
What would you do exact same thing?
Speaker 2 (24:56):
I do the exact same thing in the car ask
that way, no one. So now I'm sociales in the
whole world. Who are you dating now? No one cares.
Speaker 1 (25:04):
We're back here every week.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
But it's Jesus.
Speaker 1 (25:09):
Give you material.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
That's my you know what, that's my material all the
way through this podcast. Wherever this podcast takes us.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
You know, this podcast is on socials. Yeah, I know,
it's so embarrassing for you.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
It's not because I told you I don't want to
see anything.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I don't care over this show.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
People say I don't care likes, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
I don't care about these comments anymore. I'm done. I'm
just going to start chuning you out. Well yeah, well
we've come. We've come a long way, mate. So that
was out all started people and they wanted to know
that's how we met. And we're at work when I
was at work cheerleading, when you were in the sheds
(25:50):
twenty you're in the twenties back then, ye don't you
think it was cute that you'd get butterflies when you
cross me in the sheds?
Speaker 2 (25:56):
Really?
Speaker 1 (25:56):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Cool? I wasn't thinking of but I was thinking about
playing foot.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Well, can I just say, well, I was thinking about
his you, mate, I'm going to go cheer my fucking
ass off.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
For him shaking your pomp pomps.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
No, we weren't even cheering for your team. We were
doing first grade. So now i'd be cheering for you
if I'm still a cheerleader.
Speaker 2 (26:18):
Yeah, what's the point of cheerleaders?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (26:22):
That's what I'm asking. What's the point Yeah, dancing? You
can't tell me right, I'm not being disrespectful. I'm trying
to be like I want to say this the nicest
way possible. Right.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
That means it's going to be bad.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
When people go and buy tickets to a game, they
go to watch the team play, right. Yeah, it doesn't
sound the ticket. Here's your ticket to the chair.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
It's part of the game day entertainment.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
Stop trying to brush the fight.
Speaker 1 (26:48):
I don't want to go there. I'm done. We get it.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Well, this is what I'm saying. No one cares about him.
Check a few pomp poms. Wave your head left to right.
Guess what, I don't care. No one cares. Get out
the waist so we can play. Move off the field
so we can run the ball. How about that?
Speaker 1 (27:06):
No one cares about you fucking running the balls. Come
so you're on the wing beach. People barely see you. Okay,
so shut up. You're one step away from the actual cheerleaders.
You're the closest player. Keep becoming a cheerleader on the side.
Shut up that sort of the world. No fucking on
(27:26):
your line in here. I'm done, I'm done. You can
fuck off.
Speaker 2 (27:30):
I love it. I love it so obviously when you're
with someone for so long. We've been together next years,
ten years. We haven't been married for long, only two years. Yeah,
(27:51):
but it feels like we have. Someone took a bit longer,
but it feels like we have. You still have these
little things, this little extra pish you off about the
person that you love. Agreed, you know one of mine
is with you?
Speaker 1 (28:02):
Oh, here we go.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Yeah, it's the dishwasher.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (28:07):
How so I know the dishwasher. We have a nice one,
so after you use it and normally drives up everything
in there, right, But if you put containers in there,
your lunchbox containers, it doesn't dry the lunchbox containers up.
There's not there's not like a little person in there
walking around with a with a towel hand dry and
the lunch boxes in there.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
There's little person.
Speaker 2 (28:30):
There's when I unload the dishwasher, I do that. I
do that.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Yeah, because you have nowhere else better? No me, baby,
I've got shit on my side.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
No, it's because you're dirty. So what you know, listen, listen,
let me finish, Let me finish. And this is what
you do. This is what Taylor does. Listeners. She gets
the lunch boxes, well, there's a little bit of water
in there still, and just puts it straight in the cupboard.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
That's fine, that's not fine.
Speaker 6 (28:54):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
You know what water, you know what can go from
that mold? Mold, and we put food in there. You
don't do that.
Speaker 4 (29:00):
But you know what, he's science and that's my little
one of my little ex dries still, walle it's in
the cupboard. It doesn't doesn't stop drying, doesn't say oxygen.
You're out now, because we're in the cupboard.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
A little bit of water, not not not not puddles.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
Of it, puddles and it's droplets at the most.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
I've opened the cupboard up and I've seen in.
Speaker 1 (29:21):
There, what a flood keets you in the face, literally,
get fuck.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
I'm serious, And that's one of my ex I don't want.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
To go any your ex. One of my ex is
when we go out to somewhere right. We went to
the baby ex the other day and mate, I didn't
have one vendor bother me. They just see me have
face and they're not even going to bother your fucking
Everyone comes to you because you look so friendly and
like open, and they say that no, but they know
(29:53):
that because they know all he would go, we'll get
you fucking bypointless ship. And then I have to look
like the beach when you're like, oh, here's the mom here, mummy,
do you want something? No, we're fine, we don't need that.
Sorry you just said yes.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
You just said to me earlier on that when you
first farnd me, are like, I had a scary face.
Here you do. So all these people coming up saying
I look friendly.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Now, No, it's scary and I want to spend money.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
No, it's not very that's been more interested that we're
having twins. You don't even care. Ah, So we walked
through there. If I didn't buy you that strap, that
belt strap, how are you going to feed the girls.
How are you going to feed them to It's.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Called pillows, which we already own. They're just on the couch.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
One do you want to do the He's going to
help me do that when I'm not home and I'm
at training. You can't have two girls. Louis grabbed the pillows.
You can't grab the pillows.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Hello, women are one to women. We get shipped down
like that. Your mom had this fucking pillow in Fiji
when she raised you and four your three other brothers.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
No, so that was twenty eight years ago, my love time, she.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Still got the job done. Look at you, you bloody healthy.
It's fine.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Times have changed and you need that. So we've got
that right. We needed to get a bathtub. We got
the bathtub, which is we have a shower stand with
them in the shower. I'm just trying to save us
money before she hits the fan later. You just don't
even think with that part of your brain. You're you
(31:17):
whatever exactly whatever. People say you need this.
Speaker 1 (31:20):
You need this, You're like, oh, yeah, you don't need it.
Speaker 2 (31:23):
What did we buy?
Speaker 1 (31:25):
You just said it?
Speaker 2 (31:26):
What did we buy that? People told me to buy
the pillow the bathtub because I was having a yarn
with her, and she said, this is what I'll be
perfect for your wife.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Of course she's gonna say that, she's not gonna stay. Oh,
don't worry, keep walking. This is shit. Of course she
wants your money.
Speaker 2 (31:41):
But I see, Marvin, she had one of those as well,
and she used.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
It your sister in law. Yes, yeah, well cool, great,
I could just borrow hers. Then that's not for tweens.
You're a tight ass. Yeah I am? I am? Is
that another one in your egs? Y you'll say me
when I'm not getting paid on the two need to
leave me?
Speaker 2 (32:01):
But actually is on of my ex is it is
that you.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Your open arms when it comes to budgets.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Or budgets it's important. If it's important, we've got to
get it right. There are kids on away coming.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
We can we invest in a dishwasher that fucking dries containers.
Then we can't because that seems like a good good
news about money.
Speaker 2 (32:23):
There's no there's no little person that gets in there
that can do that. Do it yourself.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
Yes, I'm not going to be that little person either.
I don't care about a little water job. But in
a container that just has his food in the fucking freezer.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
No, the bigger one.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
No, I don't care about that either. I'm the other
one that eats tell a container. So do you care
if I'm eating mold?
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Because you want me to cop that? Because you're dirty.
That's why you dirty. I need to take shortcuts. Those
are my.
Speaker 1 (32:46):
Ex It's called being time effiicient. I wish I had
the luxury of you and taking my time with all
these little activities. I don't.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
It's not taking the time. The way you do one
thing is the way you do everything. That's how it is.
That's how life is, all right, Taylor. If it was
about the podcast, you'd bend over backwards for it. But
because it's the dishwasher, you don't want.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
To touch it. I'm going to ask Ourheart Radio if
we can go back to exploring other opportunities.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
This isn't a work because you don't like the truth,
and sometimes the truth hurts.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
Like I want to talk to Adam producer. See I said,
I didn't sign up for a weekly doctor phel fucking
session with my husband. I just want a lighthearted beans.
Speaker 2 (33:30):
Well, sometimes you don't like the truth, the truth hurts.
Just copy your l's take it. Because it's the truth.
Speaker 1 (33:35):
Can you please promise me you're not going to be
this annoying with the daughters, because I don't deserve will be.
I'm not if on.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Social media like this. Hey guys, it's me again. They're
not doing that.
Speaker 1 (33:50):
Don't talk about our daughter's like that. If they want
to get it out of social media, be like.
Speaker 3 (33:55):
Hey, guys, we are they're not doing that.
Speaker 1 (33:59):
I'm going to be a blogger with the two gals.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
I'm gonna gets fine, but they're not doing it.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
Yeah, they're going to be in my videos.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Well guess what they're gonna know how to do? Make
their bed properly like you don't know, Dry the dishes
and just wash it properly like you don't do. I'll
be teaching them and all the little things. Do it properly.
When you get up in the morning, make your bed
before you go to bed, brush your teeth when you
wake up in the morning, brush your teeth.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
I can't stand you brush your hair. Are you insinuating
that I don't do all of your bus.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
I'm no, I'm just saying that's how parent my kids.
I will.
Speaker 1 (34:35):
I don't wash my teeth at night. I don't believe
in it dirty. I don't, but I'm going to wake
up and wash it in the morning.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
That's the point. By so everything you've eaten for dinner
or whatever you have for dessert, SIT's in your mouth
or a night.
Speaker 1 (34:47):
Pluk ros, you're going to wash it in the morning,
doesn't matter. What do you mean?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
That's what I mean. I'm not a Coldgate scientist. I
can't tell you what.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
You shouldn't talk on the matter then, but that's the
way it should. I'm gonna get one of these days,
I'm going to get an expert on this podcast to
ask if it if it does anything, it does?
Speaker 2 (35:06):
I reckon you were cool.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
You keep wasting your time because guess what, while you're
in there doing your whole that's you washing your teeth.
You fucking make yourself gag that that long with five minutes,
I have to go to bed you So while you're
doing that, I guess I'm already onto my second dream.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
You're not. You're on your phone again, stro up and
down tiktoks.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Yeah, because I struggled to fall asleep when you're not
next to me. AnyWho?
Speaker 2 (35:35):
That was that was a few thank you the one.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
So I'm you threw it, and.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
I've got more in my back pocket. Of course, all.
Speaker 1 (35:45):
Right, are you clever? Because guess so, I've got plenty
more to come to, plenty more to come on that note, yeah,
so will while why I want to talk about the subject.
I've got a beauty up my sleeve, mate, not us,
thank you for once. I think we've just gotten rid
of all ours out there, but my mom and Dad.
(36:05):
So it's a nightly routine that I facetimed them all
their FaceTime me because they live in Sydney, so whatever
face time we can get with each other is good.
So I just stopped on the phone with them the
other day when you were in Sydney, and it was
just Mom who answered, which is weird because normally Dad's
always wherever Sueye is. He's two steps behind. They say
(36:30):
they ate each other, but god, they could not live
without each other. They had tied at the hip, those two.
And so I was just Mom and I'm talking to
her and I'm sensing like something's a bit off, and
then I'm like, oh, he's Dad, and she's like he's
in the kitchen. I was like, oh yeah, cool, Like
is everything okay? She's like, and that's that's rare for
(36:50):
my mom to be silent. She's like me, like we
talk about every day, and I'm like, oh, yeah, what's
wrong And she's like, me and your father aren't talking
at the moment, I said, Oh, what's happened? And so
he's the story. It's a fucking classic. It's one of
my favorite Lombardy stories evers. So, uh, they've just went
(37:11):
and got some new flooring done upseas, so my mom
had to move all the furniture downstairs. And she's got
this mirror that she's decided. Now that I've brought that down,
it kind of looks quite good on this war. So
she's hung this mirror on the wall. The wall is
part of the lounge room, but it also shares a
(37:34):
sharing war with the study. So if you see, if
you sit on the couch now and you can use
that mirror to see everything my dad's doing in the
commar And if you know my dad's history, which I've
mentioned it a few times, my dad's full time job
has been in that study. He loves his iTunes library,
(37:55):
he loves his music, that's his hobbies. He loves live streaming,
train rides from Land to Rome. He's a live cam
fanatic webcam fanatic. Sorry, we both me and him enjoy
watching Mount Everest live streams. He's always in there, blessed
men of the world when it comes to the Internet.
So my mom's just innocently on the couch watching an
(38:17):
episode of The Sopranos, a great show. It's about an
Italian family involved in the mafia. See a lot of
similarities in that show with my family, obviously, not the
drugs and corruption, but just angry Italian people exactly like
they just goes zero to one hundred, everything's a big deal.
So she's watching Tony Soprano, which is the main character,
(38:39):
and he's winching about it. The chef, the chef, and
he's saying things like he's always miserable, he complains about everything.
He's never happy about anything. Rah rah run, my mom'st
my mom's gona sounds familiar, and she catches my dad
in the mirror. Go like this like that, just like
(39:00):
that too to my mom. So he flicks the bird
at her. He puts the rude finger up and she
pounces and goes, I saw that inch sucked in. I
got you. I saw that He he jumped so fast
off his computer, cheers, what did you see, Jess? You
just fucking sucked the finger up at me and say no,
I didn't sure. I swear to god, I do know.
I sweat have got it in. I went like this,
(39:21):
I went like this, I put my glasses down. There
was a fly in my nes used every excuse under
the sun, and she's gone, fuck you, I saw everything.
He got caught out, sucked in. And then so they're
not talking. So when she's telling me this story on FaceTime,
I'm like, wait, mom, but mate, I've been at your hair.
Else when Dad's turned around, if you've done the finger
(39:42):
till they find his back Jess, he at least is
stupid to realize his son. But even while she's retelling
me this soy on face. So my dad's pounced from
the kitchen, go, oh, you're not telling Taylor about it.
I swear to god, I didn't stick the figure. But
your mom, I was going like this with my glasses,
(40:02):
all this stuff, and he's just on message damage control
right now.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
And then I could imagine what he like, what was
going through his mind as well when she's seen it?
Did he know that she put the mirror there.
Speaker 1 (40:14):
Yeah, but he wouldn't have thought or he's surveillance in me.
Speaker 2 (40:19):
I think she might be onto something new.
Speaker 1 (40:21):
Yeah, So they're going to come to New Zealand in
a few weeks to visit us. So I want to
get them on the podcast because I want to get
dad's side of the story, and then her mom started
the story, and that we could judge who's telling the truth.
I'm gonna say it's not looking too good for and
knowing his previous experience with behavior like that, so.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
When that gets nervous too, and end gets nervous, he
always rubbed his eyebrows.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
Does He's a nervous twitch.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
So if we get him on the podcast and.
Speaker 7 (40:53):
He rubbed his eyebrows and he was wrong, he's like,
so I see waters at the Lombardy house at the moment,
So it was a weird face time.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
They're fine now until we bring it up on this
week's episode and then they're listening to that fucking the
dinner and have you have you ever flipped flipped? Is
that flipped the bird? Flip the bird of me?
Speaker 2 (41:17):
Never?
Speaker 1 (41:18):
Never? No, you were just doing as joking A.
Speaker 2 (41:22):
Yeah, like my mouth gestures to.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
You, Oh, Yeah, well's immature, isn't it.
Speaker 2 (41:28):
You're talking ship and here talking.
Speaker 1 (41:34):
What can I just tell you when you went off
for me.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
Drive the lunchboxes property?
Speaker 1 (41:38):
Yeah? What am I doing behind your back when you
talking to that? I think I've ever had the need
to deal with you because I just tell you it's
your face. That's what needs to do to get the
courage to go to shut up. Anyways, I think that's enough. Okay, bye,
(41:59):
I see you Next week
Speaker 6 (42:03):
Is down.
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