Listener Mail: Guaranteed to Work Perfectly for 1,000 Years

Once more, it's time for a weekly dose of Stuff to Blow Your Mind and Weirdhouse Cinema listener mail...

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to Stuff to Blow Your Mind, a production of
My Heart Radio. Hey, welcome to Stuff to Blow your Mind.
Listener mail. This is Robert Lamb and I'm Joe McCormick,
and it's Monday, the day of the week. We read
back some messages from the mail bag provided by our
loyal mail bought Carney. Let's see, today's episode is probably

(00:24):
gonna be heavier with Weird House Cinema responses than usual,
mainly on account of the absolute del uge of messages
we have received about Return to Oz. I think this
maybe our biggest weird house mail bag ever. Yeah, it's certainly.
It's certainly got a lot of responses from folks, a
lot of strong memories of the Return to Oz. But
before we get to that, I thought we could do

(00:45):
a couple of messages about our episode on whistling. Um.
Let's see, Rob I'm gonna start off with some selections
from an email from Lurch, who write it's in a
good bit. Uh this email had a lot of good parts,
but it's long, so I'm just gonna pull out a
couple of sections. Uh. So Lurch rights when I was

(01:08):
still young. I think this may have been before the
brothers Graham actually wrote their books. My grandmother used to
tell me stories at bedtime. One of the stories was
similar to the pied piper story, except instead of using
pipes to lure the rats and then children out of town,
he whistled. I've never heard of this version elsewhere, so

(01:29):
it may be particular to her Swedish family. Either that,
or Jacob and Wilhelm had their own aversion to whistling.
Some years later, I served in the United States Coast
Guard coincidentally where I met my wife. On my first ship,
I was happily whistling a tune on the fantail when
the boson came by and admonished me not to do that.

(01:50):
When I asked why not, he said it was because
I might whistle up a storm. He was at least
half serious, adding some gruesome curly cues krakens sirens end
I rate chiefs. Well, this is interesting in in two ways.
I've never heard of that version of the pipe piper
story before. I always heard of it, uh with a pipe,
I guess in my brain I always kind of compared

(02:12):
it to that image of the snake charmer who plays
an instrument or a pipe or clarinet type instrument of
some sort um and then uh yeah, and then regarding
the coast guard, I am kind of surprised to hear
so recent a story. I assume Lurch, I know you,
you say you are quite old, but I assume this
was in the twentieth century at least. Still, I wouldn't
It wouldn't have to be too long ago, because, like

(02:33):
like we discussed, you get out on the ocean, you
get into the wild, and uh, you know, the modern
brain kind of slips away and you have to to
fall back on older patterns of thinking. I wonder how
this relates to military discipline, Like if if a commander
in the in a military command structure orders you not
to do something because it may have magical ill effects,

(02:56):
do you have to obey that order? I guess you
have to obey, no matter what the reasoning is, right,
I don't know. I mean, it sounds like, at least
on TV, that would be grounds for mutiny, right if
the commanding officer is invoking krakens and sirens, or if
not mutiny, at least like some sort of official grounds
for removing them from duty, Like if one's commander tells

(03:17):
you to stop combing your hair because it will incite
the wrath of a banshee. Do you have to stop
good good questions to Paupla. Yeah, I don't know about that.
All right, here's another one. This one comes to us
from Pamela. Pamela Rides High, Robin Joe. I'm a longtime

(03:38):
listener and love this show and thank you from the
bottom of my heart for not having seasons and disappearing
for two months every ten shows. I don't get to
stop working every two months, so I appreciate you sticking
it out with me. Well, Pamela, I did want to
have a note on this. I thank you for saying that.
But also to be fair to our peers in the
podcasting space, uh the shows that take time off in

(03:59):
between season are almost certainly not doing it because they're lazy.
They've just got they've got different production process. They need
time to develop a new season of content. We have
a different production process. Uh so, so just different kinds
of shows. And they also, I think a lot of
podcasters out there also have various other things going on,
or they have they have other gigs, they have like

(04:20):
their main gig. And yeah, for us, this this is
our main gig. So you know, everybody's everybody's life, everybody's
life or balance is a little different. But anyway, Pamela continues, anyway,
to the purpose of my message. One of the most
unique whistling pieces I can think of in modern popular
music is the German band band ram Stain's uh ingle angle.

(04:43):
To non German speakers, I have attached to I was
not expecting this uh this sister mail to end up
in Ramstein territory. Here I have attached a link to
the official music video with the whistling lead in. What
makes it so attractive and recognizable is the simplicity. Once
you here this played through, you can hear the first
two notes and know what's coming. Okay, I'm going I'm

(05:06):
gonna listen to it now and uh and see if
I am familiar with this tune. Rob is doing Ramstein research.
Let's get some Ramstein research music. All right, Okay, I
just heard heard it. Maybe we even played a little

(05:28):
bit of it there, but yeah, yeah, that's that's that's
Neat starts with the with just the whistling, and then
here come the beats, here comes the industrial edge. Pamela continues,
evidently David Lynch was a big Ramstein early adopter and
had himself as Gordon Cole whistled the intro to Angel

(05:49):
in a scene in Twin Peaks, but he flutters the
ending of the stanzas and ruins it. It hurts me
to watch. Anyway, you guys are the best. I will
be here hanging near the Capitol, thinking deep thoughts with
you while I listen. Take care, Pamela. I love to
get a message from a I think I've said the

(06:09):
name several different ways now a Romstein fan is it Romstein? Ramstein? Ramstein.
I've never talked about them out loud before, you know.
I mean, I'm familiar with them through you know, industrial music.
They've never been a group that I've listened to a
lot directly, but occasionally they're involved or they have some

(06:29):
involvement with another act. I think there's a there's a
Sugar did a remix one of their tracks, or they
did a remix of a Sugar track years back, you
know that sort of thing. Yeah. Well, so at first
I didn't believe this claim about Twin Peaks because I
was thinking, wait a minute, that that show came out
before Ramstein was a band or at least before this
song came out. But then I realized it was referring

(06:50):
to the recent revival series and it what Pamela says
is true. I dug up a clip. There is a
clip of David Lynch in costume, in character as like
an FB agent whistling this this Romstein song, and that's
pretty weird. I would have had no idea what kind
of music David Lynch listened to, but if I had

(07:11):
to guess, I would think he was, like, I don't know,
listening to weird experimental music that was just like pitch
modulation of people screaming. Or you could go totally the
other way and say it's all entirely like ambient jazz. Well,
at any rate, Pamela, thanks for writing in. It's interesting. Okay,

(07:34):
we got a lot of return to OZ to get to,
so I think maybe we should go straight to the
weird house responses. Let's do it all right. This first
message comes from d D says Hello, Joe Robin Seth.
First off, thank you for the hours upon hours of
education and entertainment I've gotten. I've been a regular listener
since I took a job that required a monstrous commute
back in I still remember the first episode I listened

(07:57):
to on my first day on the job, Talos the
On's automaton, and I've been hooked ever since. That was
an episode I'd wanted to write several times before, but
but hadn't gotten to it. But your recent Weird House
on Return to OZ finally pushed me over the edge.
I believe Robert had asked about people who had seen this,
notably in the theater, and what their impressions were. I'll

(08:20):
relate a story as part of that. My parents were
divorced in the early nineteen eighties, and as divorced parents
are wont to do, my dad would take me to
the movies as it was a fun bonding experience and
he was a fan of Weird House before it was
a thing, having worked for David Cronenberg in the early seventies. Well,
that would do it. I can't this is a Cronenberg

(08:41):
legacy email d continues. The challenge was that his picks
for child appropriate cinema were suspect, this being the late
nineteen eighties and his background in the arts being what
it was. Many selections, even if child friendly, ended up
being a little too dark he had already caught flak
in the month prior for taking seven year old me

(09:01):
to Indiana. Jones and the Temple of Doom, and VCRs
were an expensive luxury, this being the era when many
people rented the player as well as the movies, so
he figured that Return to Oz would be a nice
safe pick among what was playing at the time. It
ended up being worse. Seven year old me may have
thought that Mola Ram's heart extraction scene was pretty cool

(09:24):
and that the dinner scene was awesomely gross referring to
a Temple of Doom, but Returned to OZ gave me
nightmares for days afterwards. I'd kept swearing I'd seen faces
in the wall paper at night. Mombi's Hall of Heads
made my hair stand on end, and I still find
the Wheelies creepy to this day. There was really something

(09:44):
special about children's films from the late nineteen seventies and
early nineteen eighties. My father, bless him, did rent a
VCR for our next family movie night, only to unintentionally
terrify us further with what I think would make an
excellent weird house selection ninety seventy eight Watership Down, which
is a quote movie based on a book about bunny rabbits,

(10:06):
in the same way that Kujo is quote a movie
based on a book about a dog. He really could
not win. Regardless, Thank you for the great work that
you do. I appreciate the thoroughness, levity, and enthusiasm you
throw into your topics. You're my go to podcast and
easily top of the heap. Please keep up the great work.
D oh Well, that that was great. I mean, like

(10:27):
you said, there's a there's a David Cronenberg connection in
this email mentioned some other thoroughly strange films in their
own way. I've never actually, I've never seen Coujo. It
just never was a film that that called to me,
nor a book that called to me. And I don't
think I ever watched Watership Down either, But I've listened
to the art Garfuncle song from Watership Down, Bright Eyes

(10:48):
a Lot, That's a that's a real it's a real
heart wrencher. I haven't seen Watership Down. I have seen Coujo.
Don't know if i'd recommend it. It's it's not a
very fun time. Yeah, I mean, does the dog even talk? No,
it's a it's a movie about rabies. I mean, it's
just it's just not very fun. It's it's so weird
to look back at those early King novels. Um and

(11:11):
I don't think that. I think Salem's Lot is the
earliest King novel I actually read. But you look back
at some of them and it's it's like, here's a
guy who had so many ideas and would continue to
to bust out so many great ideas. But if you
were just looking at those first few novels, you might
you might wonder how much was really in the tank, right,
because it's like the psychic girl Uh novel and there's

(11:32):
psychic boy in a hotel novel, Killer Dog novel. It
maybe didn't look like there was like a ton of
variety ready that you know, inside that head charge to
to take over the world. But it turns out there
there was all right. This one comes to us from Beck.

(11:54):
Beck says hello from Sydney, Australia. I was so excited
to see this podcast episode. I saw Return To as
a child when it came out, and it was my
absolute favorite movie. Even now as an adult, I think
about saying oz when I see a green figurine. It
was the right level of scary as a kid, although
the Wheelers particularly scared me. I had a similar mirror

(12:14):
to the one Ozma appears in, and I would move
it like Dorothy did in the hopes she'd appear in
the mirror. For so long, no one I knew had
seen or even heard of this movie. I only rewatched
it again about five years ago, and it was amazing
to watch it as an adult and pick up on
so many things I missed as a kid. I also
also realized the VHS version I had taped from TV

(12:37):
was slightly sanitized, so I discovered some new scenes, which
was just thrilling. The movie inspired some of my fan
art as well. And here's some Labyrinth art too, Thanks
so much, guys. Cheers back and she includes several pictures
here from her her Instagram account. Be Beck's a great artist.

(12:57):
I love these paintings. Oh yeah, there's Jack Pumpkinhead. There's
Jack Pumpkinhead and Dorothy. Then there's I think Ozma holding
a Jack o lantern. I think this is from the
scene in the in the clinic where she like gives
the pumpkin to Dorothy. There's what Oh sorry, I skipped
ahead to hoggle. Yeah, from Labyrinth Yeah, that's a good one. Yeah,

(13:18):
the mirror thing is is very interesting. Pusic course, of course,
That's one of the fun but also kind of haunting
textures in Return to Oz that Dorothy is in the
real world trying to reconnect with Oz and the adults
in her world do not understand this, and they think
this is a problem. And as a viewer, we're kind
of we since we don't really see Oz manifest at

(13:39):
that point in the film, we were kind of led
to believe this as well, like this doesn't Maybe there's
the scene is a little creepy early on because we're
we kind of buy into this idea that the that
the adults are telling us, like like Dorothy needs to
get her head back on the ground here because she
is becoming too fascinated with the imaginary and those attempts

(14:00):
to reconnect with Os or part of that. I think
there is something poignant there too. You have the of
the return to Oz, the desire to return to something
which as adults, of course, we all have feelings of nostalgia,
and we and perhaps to more nuanced understanding and realistic
understanding of what it is to return to. Some of
these ideas that previously engaged us so and captured our imagination.

(14:23):
But there is I feel like there is that time
period as a child where you're still so close to
the imaginary being real that you can reach back, and
you can you can the ability to sort of reach
out and grab hold of these things, uh is is
more real, you know, because they haven't really drifted that

(14:44):
far from you. Be at some sort of a belief
be it's something like the you know, the Easter bunny
or something um or or something you know more more
poignant than that, Like you're you're closer to them, You're
closer to the dream um and and sometimes it is
an actual dream, Like I remember having dreams, vivid dreams
as a child, and there was a feeling when you
woke up from them that they were still within reach. Yes,

(15:06):
I remember that feeling too. I mean, this is something
that definitely comes through and I think especially a lot
of you know, fantasy literature because it is made by adults,
and a lot of what's going on is nostalgia for
the child's power to believe that like you, you know,
you wish in a way that you could at least
temporarily reoccupy that mind space where things that are impossible

(15:29):
for you to believe now seemed more plausible. Yeah, and
and occasionally you do find authors that are able to
really capture all of this. I think there's a Richard
Matheson short story about a little boy who believes that
he's a vampire. And of course it's this is Richard
Mathison story. So it's a it's a it's a chiller,
you know, it's a it's a horror, it's a thriller,
it's all that. Uh, he's going for a totally different vibe.

(15:52):
But if I remember, like it's it's one of these
short story, but it brings you right to this this
point in the in the story where you're not sure
which way is going to go, Like the boy believes
he has a vampire, and he is either he's either
about to have that belief crushed by the realities of
the grown up world, or it's going to go in
the other direction. It's going to go into that into

(16:13):
that direction that veers into the supernatural, and you don't
really know which way it's going to go. And both
both direction like one is one I guess his heartbreaking,
and the other is potentially horrific as well, because it
involves vampires. Right, by the way, I just looked it up.
I think the name of the short story is Blood Sun.
But it's been a long time since I've read it,

(16:35):
but I remember now as being being quite good at
the time. All right, This next message is from Pat,
also about return to Oz. Pat says, guys, another great
weird house. I also feel regret in having missed the
original release. I remember word of mouth being particularly bad.

(16:57):
I have since developed a wariness of peer pressure. I
would have loved this movie. I paused your podcast to
watch the film for Rusa. Bulk is an actress with
a special identity who is like her. She's so good
in this film. If I knew Nicole Williamson was in it,
I would have seen it earlier. I am a big fan.
I recall seeing him in a vanity production on Broadway

(17:18):
which is called Jack a Night on the Town with
John Barrymore. And by the way I looked this up,
it looks like it was a one man show with
Nicole Williamson as the famous American stage actor John Barrymore,
who I think was active in the in the first
half of the twentieth century. Pat goes on about Williamson.
He was powerful and hilarious. I recall a mean spirited

(17:41):
reviewer referring to his performance as quote one drunk playing another.
Who is to say, but as a guy who loves
his whiskey. I thought Nicole was drinking during the performance.
But Pat goes on, I don't think Returned to Oz
had very much to do with the classic film. Rather,
it's a tribute to the original stories. The dual role

(18:02):
of Warlie and the Gnome King is an opportunity to
explore fantasy in the mind of a child and adults
inability to understand. We were all children, but when most
of us grow, we build barriers to childish fantasy. Not Bomb,
referring to the author of the books, as always, thanks
for the great job of analysis. Please do keep it up. Pat,
that's it. There's a good point about Bomb. Kind of

(18:24):
a what a William Blake figure in that respect, Man,
I would love to see a live one man performance
by Nicole Williamson. It sounds it sounds like it could
have been a precarious situation that if you don't know
exactly how it's going to go, but it's but again,
it was a great actor. So if if he is

(18:46):
going to excel anywhere, it's going to be on the
stage or in front of the camera. All right, this
next one comes to us from Naja. Naja writes, Dear
Robert and jo I wanted to write into you, guys,
as I was particularly delighted by your episode on Return
to Oz, which I was lucky enough to see in

(19:07):
the cinema way back when I would have been about
eight or nine at the time, and I found the
darker scenes at the of the film being deliciously scary.
They grounded the plot in reality somehow, and even though
by that age I knew places like Oz or Narnia
couldn't be real. Starting off the movie from a point
where Dorothy was under threat from an evil psychiatrist because

(19:28):
of her delusions seemed a much more palpable and realistic
threat than a tornado to someone who doesn't live in
Tornado Alley. At least, by the time I saw Return
to Oz, I had already seen quite a few disturbing
adult films such as brazil Um, the Twilight Zone movie,
and parts of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, So

(19:48):
Returned to Oz was a fun level of dark atmosphere.
In comparison, I remember that when the movie came out
in Perth, the main bookshops stocked reprints of the OZ sequels.
O MG, I never knew there was more than one book.
The sequels were never listed in my copy of Wizard
of Oz in our local library only had the original,

(20:09):
so I literally never knew there was a treasure trove
of OZ books. A very happy day for me, indeed.
Further on OZ media, there is a young adult series
of books set in the OZ, beginning with Dorothy Must Die.
In this series, Dorothy and her companions are the evil
rulers of Oz. The Scarecrow does vile experiments on captured citizens,

(20:32):
the Tin Man is a slasher, and the Lion and
Man Eater Momby is part of an underground resistance movement
fighting the evil regime. OZ characters also make many appearances
in the Vertico series Fables, and of course there's a
Jack Pumpkinhead in The Sandman, though he's not a sweet,
innocent character, more like a groundskeeper Willie. The original OZ

(20:55):
movie was something I was absolutely obsessed with since I
saw it on TV when I was around on five.
I remember checking the TV guide every week to see
if it would be on again, and every couple of
years I was rewarded by another showing all the days
before VCR. However, this brings me to my next movie obsession,
which was ex Caliber. My uncle, who worked with computers

(21:17):
and was the only technophile in the family, lent us
his VCR for a week, knowing I was a kid
into a Thurian legends. One of the videos he included
was ex Caliber, which I watched at least once a
day for that week. The movie completely blew my mind.
Even the fact of it being a seriously cut down
version of the original saga couldn't spoil it for me.

(21:38):
To this day, I can conjure up various scenes in
my head along with the Wagnerian score, and every time
I hear Carl Orff's Carmina Verona, I see nights galloping
on horseback in my mind. I think this movie would
make a great weird house cinema. It has some great
actors such as Patrick Stewart and Helen Mirian, and seriously,

(21:59):
the very best Merlin ever committed to film. Sorry, Sam Neil,
you were good, but not that good. I never realized
it was the same actor as the Nome King slash Psychiatrist.
But to be fair, I was only six or seven
when I saw Excalibur. The sets and costumes look great.
In the whole movie is extremely atmospheric. Yes, I've seen
it since and parts of it have aged a little poorly,

(22:20):
But along with Monty Python and The Holy Grail, I
think it's the best adaptation of the Outherian legends. Naja, Wow,
thanks Naja. So now I'm really starting to feel left
out not having seen Excalibur. Was that was the same
director as Deliverance? Right, yeah it was. It was John
Boorman oh as as Deliverance and same director as The

(22:41):
Exorcist to yes, that happened? I have no idea. Yeah, yeah,
a major director. He directed The Emerald Forest. Czar does
Zar does. That's one when I've I've never seen. It's
well known for its weirdness, but I don't I don't
think that's when we could cover on Weird House. Yeah,

(23:01):
it's been a while. I recall it having some uh
some kind of bummer elements if we were to do
it on the show. But at the same time, it
does have like the parts that are good are really good.
It's got Sean Connery and like this weird red speedo
costume with a ponytail and a mustache and flying heads right,

(23:23):
big kind of flying flying head in the sky. Oh
and for a weird connection. Now, maybe you should switch
off the podcast now if you don't want any spoilers
for this nineteen seventies movie. But to spoil the ending
of Czardas it's a movie about a like dystopian future
with a sort of imposed mythology that is actually based

(23:44):
on the Wizard of Oz. Zardaws is a short the
Wizard of Oz that's like the twist ending. Yeah, see
it comes it active what we were talking about in
the Return to Oz episode. Like you you can feel
however you feel about the original Wizard of oz Holm
or the Wizard of Oz books, but like the Wizard
of Oz has just been so influential, uh in in

(24:06):
in fiction and fantasy that you can't separate, you can't
remove it, Like the p is in the pool at
this point. Yeah, that the p is even in zardas well.
We'll we'll have to look at I haven't seen ex
caliber and forever. I'll have to look back at it
and make sure it's a It would be a good pick,
but it's it's very shiny. It's a very shiny film.

(24:29):
And I don't think we've have we covered anything that
has authority and elements in it thus far. I don't
know not that Merlin shown up. Merlin showed up in something? Right? Yeah?
Why not? Surely? I surely Merlin has showed up in
a weird house film already. I would be surprised if
he hasn't. Maybe I'm I misremembering. Okay, well, either way,
I gotta watch Excalibur. But I think that does it

(24:51):
for today's mail bag. That's right. We're going close it
up today, but we'll be back, so keep them coming.
We do listener mail every Monday, and the stuff will
blow your mind. Podcast Need we do core episodes on
Tuesdays and Thursday's a short form Monster fact or Artifact
on Wednesdays, and on Friday's we do Weird How Cinema.
That's our time to set aside most serious concerns and
just talk about a weird film, huge things. As always

(25:12):
to our excellent audio producer Seth Nicholas Johnson, if you
would like to get in touch with us with feedback
on this episode or any other to suggest a topic
for the future, or just to say hello. You can
email us at contact at stuff to Blow your Mind
dot com. Stuff to Blow Your Mind is a production

(25:34):
of I heart Radio. For more podcasts for my heart Radio,
visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
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