I Can’t Sleep
Trouble sleeping? Let me read you something boring. Three nights a week, I use a soothing voice to quietly share slow, factual content—usually from Wikipedia. No plot twists. No drama. Just calm, sleepy facts.
Episodes
June 1, 2025 • 33 mins
If you’re looking for a relaxing deep dive into something both fragile and oddly durable, this episode about glass should do the trick. From its sleepy silicate beginnings to its many transparent moods, there’s plenty here to lull your brain into a gentle stupor. Perfect for fans of insomnia relief, bedtime stories, and long, slow explanations of materials you never think about.
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May 29, 2025 • 37 mins
Perfect for winding down, this bedtime read takes you on a slow, dirt-level journey through the surprisingly meticulous world of terrariums. If miniature glass ecosystems don’t put you to sleep, the Latin plant names probably will. A calm, relaxing choice for insomnia relief and fans of low-stakes greenery.
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May 27, 2025 • 35 mins
Flaky, hollow, and suspiciously light, choux pastry is the kind of delicate French dough that somehow became the backbone of everything from éclairs to swans. It’s made by cooking the flour before baking, which feels like cheating but makes for excellent bedtime reading. A soothing deep dive into pâte à choux—ideal for pastry fans, sleep seekers, and anyone too tired to whisk anything.
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May 25, 2025 • 34 mins
Deep sea relaxation meets crushing geological indifference as we drift down to the Mariana Trench, Earth’s most famous abyss and arguably its least inviting vacation spot. Perfect for insomnia relief or anyone who needs to feel small before bed.
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May 22, 2025 • 36 mins
Rhythmic clattering and plastic cups might not scream “bedtime,” but the soothing repetition of sport stacking’s oddly competitive world just might. Ideal for insomniacs who find NASCAR too subtle, this episode stacks up nicely for sleep.
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May 20, 2025 • 35 mins
If your insomnia demands something with spikes but no real drama, hedgehogs may do the trick. These solitary, nocturnal insectivores bumble through gardens and folklore alike without stirring much excitement. Ideal bedtime material.
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May 18, 2025 • 36 mins
Drift off with a calming exploration of hydrogen, the element that somehow manages to be both the most abundant in the universe and the least interesting at dinner parties. This relaxing bedtime story about atomic simplicity, star fuel, and flammable gas is sure to bore your insomnia into submission.
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May 15, 2025 • 31 mins
City sounds too exciting? Don’t worry—Chengdu’s sprawling history, panda diplomacy, and ancient irrigation systems are somehow still perfect for insomnia relief. Settle in for a bedtime story about tea, temples, and very slow urban development.
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May 13, 2025 • 37 mins
Mercury spins slowly, scorches in sunlight, and freezes in shadow—perfect conditions for a relaxing bedtime story about planetary extremes. Its lack of atmosphere and general refusal to support life make it oddly peaceful. Ideal for insomnia relief and planetary trivia lovers.
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May 11, 2025 • 45 mins
If you’re looking for sleep, try contemplating the multiverse—an infinite number of universes where you still can’t find your keys. Theoretical physics has rarely been so quiet, or so unconcerned with practical application. Ideal for insomnia relief and cosmic-scale bedtime stories.
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May 8, 2025 • 35 mins
Cold-blooded and weirdly talented, frogs have been hopping quietly through evolution with their sticky tongues and surprise screams. This episode covers the amphibians’ bizarre lives in enough detail to cure even the most persistent insomnia. Perfect for sleep, relaxation, and background bedtime stories.
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May 6, 2025 • 39 mins
Relax into the surprisingly uneventful tale of hot dogs, from old-world sausages to ballpark staples. A sleep-friendly stroll through culinary trivia perfect for bedtime stories, relaxation, and mild curiosity before dozing off.
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May 4, 2025 • 37 mins
Heavy-duty diesel engines, fuel systems, and emissions control—everything you never knew could put you to sleep faster than melatonin. Ideal for fans of bedtime stories about torque curves, or anyone hoping to snore through the history of internal combustion. Your insomnia never stood a chance.
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May 1, 2025 • 32 mins
Sleep through the slow burn of redemption arcs, father issues, and jasmine-scented wisdom—perfect for bedtime, insomnia relief, or firebending cooldowns.
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This content is derived from the Wikipedia article on Unc...
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April 29, 2025 • 39 mins
Dental hygienist duties like tartar scraping and floss lectures might not scream “bedtime story,” but somehow, here we are. A slow drift into dental monotony for your insomnia relief.
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This content is derived from the W...
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April 27, 2025 • 36 mins
Pure mathematics: the tranquil wilderness of logic where numbers frolic without purpose. No real-world applications here—just soothing abstractions to lull you into oblivion. Great for sleep, boredom, or philosophical insomnia relief.
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April 24, 2025 • 33 mins
Sand dollars: those flat, slow sea creatures you vaguely remember from beach trips are here to bore you to sleep with echinoderm trivia. Perfect for bedtime, ocean facts, and surrendering to that nap you’ve been fighting.
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April 22, 2025 • 35 mins
Mochi: glutinous rice gently transformed into a sticky, chewy tradition that’s lasted over a thousand years—perfect for bedtime stories, sleepy facts, and those who enjoy their history slow and mildly sweet.
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This conte...
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April 20, 2025 • 36 mins
Drift off with a soothing dive into Earth Day—its origins, oddly specific dates, and how it became the planet’s favorite low-effort holiday. Ideal for eco-friendly bedtime stories and insomnia relief that’s 100% biodegradable.
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April 18, 2025 • 35 mins
Good Friday observances, fasting rules, and calendar math—perfectly solemn content to lull you into gentle, reverent sleep. Ideal for insomnia, not introspection.
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This content is derived from the Wikipedia article on G...
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