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December 27, 2024 16 mins

George Noory and counselor Howard Riback explore his work helping people overcome their problem gambling, how marketing makes gambling seem easy and fun without acknowledging its dangers, and how his family staged an intervention to address his own gambling addiction.

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Now here's a highlight from Coast to Coast AM on iHeartRadio.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
And welcome back to Coast to Coast George Nori with
Howard Reback as we talk about gambling. What are some
of the signs of a problem gambler, Howard that somebody
can look at and recognize with a loved one or friend.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
I like to answer that by saying, it's something like
when you fall in love. It's something that you just can't.

Speaker 4 (00:28):
Get out of your mind.

Speaker 3 (00:29):
You eat it, you sleep it, you drink it. You
think about it all day long, all during your waking hours.
You think about how and when you're going to gamble next,
Where you're going to gamble next, where the money to
gamble next will come from if you don't have it,
Stories about telling your friends, your family, or your employer

(00:53):
about why you might be missing some time so you
can go gamble. It encompasses your life, George. It literally
takes over your supposed normal thought process and you just
can't shake it. And when you start thinking about gambling
all day long, then God knows you have a problem.

Speaker 4 (01:13):
And that's that's.

Speaker 3 (01:14):
Pretty much how I lived my life for a couple
of years, and in full transparency, and I knew something
was wrong, but I just did not stop. It took
over my life.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
Did you pull out yourself or did somebody help you?

Speaker 3 (01:31):
This is a story. I don't know why I get.
I get very very teary when I whenever I'm asked
that question. But I suppose it means it's real. I
had my family help me, George, And we can digress
for a second in full transparency, that my brother, who
is everything to me, and of course he's he's listening

(01:55):
quietly in his home in Los Angeles, is a friend
of yours. And that's how you and I come together.
And my brother Billy, along with a few cousins in
Los Angeles, in conjunction with my ex wife and my folks,
had me come to LA and arouse on false pretenses.
And of course when I when I got to Los Angeles,

(02:17):
the family had an intervention, George. And as they say,
the jig was up.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
They were waiting for you.

Speaker 4 (02:25):
Huh.

Speaker 3 (02:26):
They were waiting for me, and without the bad pun
they got me in spades. And they did what they
set out to do. And these were professionals, not therapists,
but whatever they did, it worked. They could not have
done a finer job. I never felt so low in

(02:47):
my life, next to a few stories about getting hurt
while I was gambling, but that's for another question or
another date. And my brother and the family, as I mentioned,
did what they had to do. They called me out
on it. If I could say one what one nice

(03:08):
thing about myself at that time was I didn't give
them any trouble. I didn't put up a fight I
was had. They cornered me. But the important thing is George,
more than anything, was that the deal with my family
was if I was to admit that I had a problem,
which I did just about instantly, was they were going

(03:30):
to back me up and help me get out of it.
But as anybody who went to rehab knows, you have
to admit it yourself first and foremost, because if not,
nothing else matters. So insummation, I was in Los Angeles,
the family was.

Speaker 4 (03:50):
Waiting for me.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
They put the puck in the net. They got me
to go to rehab. I admitted everything, and I won't
say that as they say is history. It was a
long and tough journey out, But that's the day it began,
and literally and literally it was like yesterday George. But
it worked, God knows it worked. They did a yeoman job,

(04:13):
they all did. And once again, a very very special
thank you to my brother, who I repeat as listening Billy.
And without him, I really can't tell you where I'd
be right now, George, I really, I really don't know.

Speaker 2 (04:30):
And he's one of Hollywood's a great scriptwriters.

Speaker 4 (04:33):
He's one of the best scriptwriter comedian.

Speaker 3 (04:36):
But to me, his best job is being a brother.
He was a great son and a great friend of mine.

Speaker 4 (04:44):
He stood by anything, and it's he stood by me.

Speaker 3 (04:48):
And I'm very proud to say that. Although he lives
on the different coast, in a different country, three thousand
miles away, we speak at least five times a week,
even if it's to check it with each other or
tell each other a ridiculous joke or talk about baseball.
We never let thirty six hours go without speaking to

(05:09):
each other. He was behind me. He waited for me
to apologize, which I did. He waited for me to
apologize to everybody that had hurt around me, which I did.
And I repeat the rest as I say, is history.
But it wasn't easy. George, and anybody listening right now
to your listeners, anybody going through what I went through
before I had help. I beg you, I urge you,

(05:33):
I ask you, ever so politely, to put up your hand,
speak up, speak out. People do want to help, but
you have to either ask for it or be honest.
It's not just going to always come to you. I
was exceptionally lucky with the family that I had and
that I still had today, but not everybody is that lucky.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah, how many problem gamblers are in denial?

Speaker 3 (06:01):
Oh god, I have to say that any problem gambler
at the beginning are all in denial. And again I
go back to myself in first person, that it's so
hard to explain when you're going through a horrific addiction
and deep down and I'd like to think that I'm

(06:22):
not I mean, I may not be Albert Einstein, but
I'm also not the dumbest guy in the block. I
had to have known, and I think about this often, George,
I have to have known that I had a problem,
but somehow that thought process went away and I kept
on doing what I'm doing. So I think, at the beginning,

(06:43):
until you feel pain, be it with your family, be
it at work, be it in your bank, account. I
think everybody goes through denial until the point when it
begins to hurt you. And hurt comes in all different
all different ways, right, and when it stops, it begins

(07:06):
to alter your life. And Tuesday wasn't the same as Monday,
and Monday wasn't the same as Sunday, and your relationship
with your family wasn't the same as it was a
month ago. Then you have to either change your ways
or you are living in denial. Because again, I repeat,
I think anybody and everybody must know when they're doing

(07:27):
something wrong, and it just takes that that little moment
in time, that little moment in time when we finally
reached our breaking point. And with me, it was sitting
in my brother's living room in his home in Beverly Hills,
when I knew facing the family and I knew that

(07:47):
it was up. The word denial just left my body
and I had a whole new process that I had
to go through. It was a new project that I
had to live through and work. Yet, So to answer
your question, I think everybody's in denial until such time
yours as it begins to hurt your life.

Speaker 4 (08:09):
If that makes.

Speaker 2 (08:09):
Sense, could you go at this point to Vegas, sit
at a blackjack table, have a little fun, and get
up and leave.

Speaker 3 (08:16):
One thousand percent. And I'm not saying nine hundred percent,
one thousand percent or more. Again, when Billy comes home
to Montreal a couple of times a year, we live
the old days. It used to take my mom and
dad when they were alive, to the casino and have dinner.
I sit with Billy. He plays his one hundred bucks

(08:37):
or fifty bucks in THEI Kino machine. I have my one,
two or three diet cokes. I watch the world go by.
I say hello to everybody I know, and I literally
and I want to say this very very politely. It's
not that I couldn't care less, but I have such
a different take on the building that we call the
casino than I used to have that it's not remotely

(09:00):
it's literally black and white, George, it's not the same.
So to answer your question, as a matter of fact,
I've been trying to get to Vegas and meet Billy
in Vegas, and maybe this show will will promote us
to finally go one of these fine days. I'd love
to go, absolutely, but it's very simple. If you're not
going to go with a gazillion dollars on you that

(09:21):
you can't lose, then there's no harm. Why not? I
still love the game of black jack. As a matter
of fact, I consult for a lovely, lovely casino. That is,
for those of you who may not know. I'm in Montreal, Canada,
and halfway between Montreal and Quebec City is a city
called Three Rivers, but an hour and a half drive

(09:43):
from Montreal, and I consult for this casino in Wallenack, Quebec.
It's a native casino and I consult for them for
this sole reason that the people who run the casino,
the general manager and the operation manager. And I'll give
a quick shutout to Carl and JF. The guys that
run the casino, they walk the walk and they talk

(10:04):
to talk, and they care about the customer and nobody
gets hurt in their casino if they should see that.
And my job is to keep the casino basically clean.
If anybody has a problem, I'm there, meaning that I'm
in the casino now more than I used to be
when I gambled, which is comical.

Speaker 4 (10:24):
You know.

Speaker 3 (10:24):
Families hire me George to watch their partner who might
be lying I'm giving a picture. Please see if you
can see John at the casino. So I go in
blah blah blah. So I literally spend more time in
casinos now than I ever did in the throes of
me having a sickness, and I just look at it

(10:45):
completely differently. Obviously it's it's I'm comfortable, but it's a
whole different world. The idea of going in, George and
blowing the kinds of money that I did in what
I call the old days twenty plus years ago, sickens me,
revolts me, disgusts me, and there's no interest at all,

(11:08):
none done.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
What is it about addictive gambling that happens to people?
What are they looking for?

Speaker 3 (11:17):
I think the average look not the average person. I
think the five, six or seven percent, George, that are
the addictive gamblers. I think what they're looking at is
they want all the money in the building, which is
not going to happen unless your steed you win, or
you own the casino or you're the operator.

Speaker 2 (11:37):
And look what happened to good old sleeve.

Speaker 3 (11:39):
Okay, well exactly that's a whole other story. Absolutely, and
it can't be done. You know, people who have the problem.
They have forty chips in front of them, George, they
want sixty. They have sixty chips in front of them.

Speaker 4 (11:57):
They want eighty.

Speaker 3 (11:58):
It's never enough. And there in lies the problem that
it's never enough, which goes back to the beginning of
our conversation almost fifty minutes ago, about being greedy, about
wanting everything everything in moderation. And the problem is, I
said before, they have a great marketing team. Most casinos do,

(12:20):
and they lure you into the building, which is fine,
no different than alcohol companies or celebrities that own tequila companies.

Speaker 2 (12:31):
Or retail companies trying to get you to buy their products.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
I mean, it's exactly.

Speaker 3 (12:37):
I bought one thing an Amazon three weeks ago. I
still at ninety eight ADS a day, exactly exactly, and
that doesn't add in. Good luck to them. That's called marketing,
which is a brand new enterprise in the last thirty years.
But as far as Gambers are concerned, they want easy money.
And the problem is when somebody does win, they think

(12:58):
it's easy. They think why work, I can go to
the casino and make a living that way, And when
you start to think that way, that's when you know
you're really a sick person with a problem. I did.
I thought that way. I was in the clothing business.
I was a pilot. I did okay, But I figured

(13:22):
I could go to the casino and make a month's
salary in an evening. And you know what, I could.
The problem is I would give it back the next
day and some so at the end of the day
or the end of two days, you're negative. Eventually, as
you said before Georgia half an hour ago, Vegas wasn't
built on winters n so invariably people give it back.

(13:45):
The key is if you can walk into a casino
and you know when to leave, and you know when
to stop, and you have a budget, and you listen
to yourself, you wouldhere to that budget. You don't lie
to yourself. You go with two hundred dollars and that
doesn't mean you go in with three and you stop.

(14:07):
I think it's a terrific way to spend an evening.
You can have lots of fun. It's when you lose
yourself that's when the trouble begins. And I lost myself
and that's when the trouble began. And to answer your
question from a few minutes ago, can I go to
Vegas right now and have a great time. Absolutely, absolutely,

(14:27):
matter of fact, I will, and I'll have a great time,
and I won't be sick, and I won't blow my
brains out, and my family will not have to rescue
me again. How's that. That's a promise in front of
all your listeners right now? Okay, George.

Speaker 2 (14:41):
I was there about six months ago and met Wayne Newton,
and that was worth the entire trip to me.

Speaker 3 (14:46):
Howard, he's about three four hundred years old.

Speaker 4 (14:50):
Now, how old is Wayne Newton?

Speaker 2 (14:51):
He's up there, he's up there. But it was fun.

Speaker 4 (14:55):
It was his story.

Speaker 2 (14:57):
I heard a Sinatra story that he was at the Sands,
done with his show, had a line of credit with
the casino. Howard Hughes had just bought the casino and
they didn't get along because they were fighting over Ava Gardner.
And that Frank was sitting at a blackjack table losing,

(15:18):
ran out of money and asked the pit boss give
me my marker because he thought he had like fifty
or one hundred thousand dollars on credit, and Howard Hughes
had already revoked it and they didn't have anything. And
Frank got up and he was so upset, so angry,
gone to a fight with the pit boss, who knocked

(15:39):
out his two teeth, knocked out his front teeth. Sinatra's
teeth got knocked out.

Speaker 3 (15:46):
One thing you learn when you're in the casino business,
never argue or fight with security because.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
You're not going to win. You're not going to win.

Speaker 3 (15:55):
Now, I'm one hundred and fifty pounds five seven jew
from Montreal. It's not a good idea to take on
casino security.

Speaker 4 (16:05):
Here's the good news.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
I now work with them, not against them, So it's
all good. No, but you're you're right. People walk into
the building, George, and luckily it's not a big amount.
But but mathematically it's still too many. And people do
tend to lose themselves. And that's a great story you
just told. I never knew that. I wonder that's a

(16:26):
public story.

Speaker 4 (16:27):
I love it.

Speaker 3 (16:28):
I mean, I've seen I've seen athletes. I work with athletes, entertainers, politicians,
some local big wigs here in Montreal, Toronto, and you'd
be surprised what these people turn themselves into when they're losing,
or they have lost already.

Speaker 1 (16:45):
Listen to more Coast to Coast am every weeknight at
one a m. Eastern and go to Coast to coastam
dot com for more

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