November 30, 2025 • 16 mins
Guest host Ryan Wrecker and author Joel Steele discuss the benefits of mindset shifting.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Now here's a highlight from coast to coast AM on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Maybe I should look at this in the opposite type
of way, and maybe this is not what these type
of books are meant for. But what are some things
I shouldn't be doing? Like, let's look at the don'ts.
Do you have any advice for they stay away from
this type of stuff because it's not helping you.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
Well, I would say, don't use the book to prop.
Speaker 4 (00:24):
Up a table.
Speaker 5 (00:26):
You know, I would say, don't use it to warm
your house in the fireplace.
Speaker 6 (00:31):
Uh huh.
Speaker 4 (00:32):
But but no, I don't have a lot of don'ts.
Speaker 5 (00:35):
This This book is not designed to beat people over
the head.
Speaker 4 (00:38):
But you know, don't do this, do that.
Speaker 5 (00:40):
It's telling my story of when I have lived on
and when I have lived off and the realization that
everybody has.
Speaker 4 (00:49):
This switch in their brain. And you hear people talk
about it.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Sometimes it's from the podium after a game, you know,
a basketball or football game. Hey, you know I flipped
the switch or the switch went off, or I had a.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Moment or epiphany.
Speaker 5 (01:02):
It's that switching your brain and your brain itself that
drives everything from there.
Speaker 4 (01:07):
You know, your brain drives your body.
Speaker 5 (01:09):
Whoever your thoughts are is where kind of the rest
of you gravitates towards. So hopefully you don't have negative
thoughts and gravitate that way. But the idea is to
use this switch that you have, use the energy, the passion,
whatever your purpose is, towards something positive because if people
(01:29):
do that, I just think this world will be a
better place. People will be less miserable, people will be
happier and feel that they're getting more out of their life.
They're getting their money's worth, so to speak. So that's
really the main focus there. But when I talk about
on versus OP, that's the whole life switch concept, and
that's why I named it that because I think it's
(01:50):
something you could really imagine in your head like a switch.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
You can literally flip it on and off.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
And I'm not someone to tell you that I'm always on.
I usually am, but I've had moments where I've been
major lay off.
Speaker 6 (02:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Well, one thing you mentioned about negative thoughts, and it
reminded me of when I was taking my driver's lessons
when I was, you know, fifteen or whatever it was,
before getting the license at sixteen, and one of the
things they tell you is when you're driving, whatever you're
looking at, you tend to veer towards.
Speaker 6 (02:21):
Is that what negative thoughts are like?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
If that's what you're paying attention to, If that's what
you're thinking about, naturally you're going to veer towards it.
As a person, is that what you're finding one hundred percent?
Speaker 5 (02:31):
And it's it's negative or positive, it works both ways.
So yeah, if you're if you're looking at something, you
are going to start to shift that way.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
And if it's negativity that.
Speaker 5 (02:42):
You find popping up a lot, I think a lot
of people view to the they skew to the negative.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
I do sometimes myself. I don't know why just.
Speaker 5 (02:50):
Is that way, but I almost view it like a
song that pops song You can just skip it, you know,
you can give that song a thumbs down or just
literally skip that song.
Speaker 4 (03:00):
And so why can you not? Why can you not
skip a thought in your brain?
Speaker 5 (03:04):
It's a nope, not going to listen to this and
just skip it right over it.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
And I encourage people to.
Speaker 5 (03:10):
Do that and to think about think about it in
that way that you don't have to listen to this
stuff if you don't want to.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
What I've noticed too, and we've learned a lot about
social media in the last five years, especially since the
congressional hearings and a lot of people raising awareness to
the manipulation that goes on, particularly to young people, which
is very troubling, and you start to realize that miserable
has a market. So if you are having a problem
(03:38):
with something, these social media websites, these tech companies can
pick up on that and they use that as a
marketing plot point to you, as it is just one
extra thing in your profile that they know they can
advertise to, which is kind of a shame if you
think about it, and it's unfortunate. So how can you
tell if something or someone is taking advantage of you?
Meaning how can you tell that you know something may
(04:03):
be holding you back that you don't know is holding
you back. It may seem invisible, but I know that
there are things out there that do have that effect
on people.
Speaker 5 (04:13):
Yeah, you're right about that, and it's manipulation and it's financed,
and it's terrible because it gets people that their lowest oftentimes,
And that's another benefit of spending time with yourself. You
know you're not going to have any AI or or
any kind of marketing. Behavioral marketing go through your own head.
I mean, do you have advertisements in your own brain?
Of course not, and so you.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
Need you, you know, you need to really unplug to
know for sure that these are real thoughts through yours
and not being piped or fed in there.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
And that's an important thing.
Speaker 5 (04:47):
But you know, I almost got rid of all my
social media before I launched the book because I was
so tired of it and the thoughts that I put
in my head and the things I was looking at,
the things I was, you know, scrolling through. It. Used
to tell my kids, if you find me on LinkedIn,
and I've reached the height of boredom, and please shake
me out of the state. And now I'm using LinkedIn
all the time to promote the book. And it's because
(05:09):
of that. You know, if you want to get your
book out in the world, or anything out in the world,
you've got to get out in the world. And these
days most things are done on mine in the computer world,
and it drives me crazy.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
But that's just where we're at. You know.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
It's like we joke around with all this AI and
TEX stuff. It's like, have these people not seen the
terminator and the sky network or whatever.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
It was called.
Speaker 5 (05:31):
So we're walking walking right into this here, and you know,
what are you going to do? But when you unplug
from all this stuff, you really can find those emotions,
those feelings.
Speaker 4 (05:42):
You know, if it's negative feelings, what do you do
with that? What can you do with that? What shouldn't
you do?
Speaker 5 (05:48):
And you usually have emotions to say, well, Okay, I
want to be like this or I don't want to
be like that. Like I give you a short example,
like I had an abusive father that my mom pulled
us away from, and I, for whatever reason, I didn't
have any training. I just decided to use that as
an example.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
Of who I didn't want to be and who.
Speaker 5 (06:09):
You know, wanted to be nothing Like I wanted to
be the best dad I could be, and I would
like the.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Personal plug for myself.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
Think I've done that in my own little world here,
and that's just something I went through. But I think
for everyone else, you go through something bad. Okay, Yah
had no surprise. Everybody does. But do you want to
perpetuate that or do you want to cut that and
end that and never have that be that way again?
And I was talking to my brother with Thanksgiving. You know,
my father was so bad. I didn't even know so
(06:37):
much of it because I was two years younger. But
my brother was telling me the story about my dad
started a pizza fight and the mall years ago. And
I remember the pizza fight because when two grown men
are throwing pizza at each other, you you know, you think.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
You remember that. And my brother said, do you remember
how that started?
Speaker 5 (06:53):
Us said, well, like, the guy bumped into our dad, right,
and he goes, no, there's this kid on crutches and
he was coming and our dad was coming and our
dad didn't move. And subsequently, the kid with crutches hits
my dad's pizza, knocks it over and he starts yelling
at this kid on crutches and his parents, and then
he throws the first.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Life and it's just like how could Like it was
years later and not even remembering that part of it,
I was like embarrassed to be this guy's kid.
Speaker 5 (07:21):
You know, I don't know who the kid was in
the mall and all that, but I'm like, how can
people be so rotten? And again, I just decided I
didn't want to be like this guy at all. And
I think again, for a lot of people, you've gone
through something. It could be tragic, traumatic, but you can
use that as a catalyst in one way or the other,
either to just be like that, you know, be like
your parent in this example, or be nothing like it.
(07:43):
And again, it's when you're aware and plugged into that
moment you can make these choices, these decisions. And I
think life is a series of choices, you know, I
mentioned option A versus option B. I think generally there's
two broad choices of how you can take things, and
I think people know what the best choices, but it's
sometimes not the easiest.
Speaker 6 (08:03):
I have to say, a pizza fight is so absurd.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I shouldn't be laughing at that, but I never encountered
a food fight in real life. Just the concept and
the visual is humorous to me, not the trauma that
comes with it as a child. But you know what
I found too, it's kind of interesting when you emphasize
tuning in and taking the time really looking into yourself.
(08:28):
But there's so much noise that goes on in the
world that you mentioned that the first part. If you're
in your own mind, hopefully the ads don't start creeping in.
It's only a matter of time before it becomes more direct.
But let's say I'm sitting quietly and I'm going to
think about things like, oh, I haven't had a mcribb
in a while, and because an advertisement will creep in
(08:51):
and like oh yeah, they find ways to get into
your brain if you like it or not. So how
do you turn off that static, that noise when it
starts to creep in? Is there some sort of mechanism
you can use to, I guess, get yourself off that mindset?
Speaker 5 (09:08):
Well, you know, in the beginning, when you first, you know,
take that time, You're gonna have all kind of thoughts,
probably some weird ones like mcribs flying by and other
things like that. But when you do it, you start
to get used to it. You also realize that you
can decide to sort of go with certain thoughts or
say nope, not going that path.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
And I do that sometimes. I wake up.
Speaker 5 (09:26):
I try to be very positive and grateful for everything
in my life. When I first get out of bed
on my phone is nowhere near my bed. I wake
up before I even get out. I open my eyes
and I lay there and I think about these things
that I'm thankful for. Grateful for And sometimes I start
thinking about business, I start thinking about some of my
clients or the market or whatever, and I.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Just kind of said, nope, nope, keep going, like I'm
not going to grab on to you and ride you out.
Speaker 5 (09:52):
So it's grabbing on to certain thoughts and going for
a ride or just deciding no, I'm not going to
take that one. It's kind of like deciding when your
body's or surfing is you're going to ride awave or not.
Ye know, I'm gonna let that one go. And that's
what you want to do with these thoughts. Let some
go rite others.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
I also find this, and this is going to sound weird,
but in my own life is I pull examples of
me as a way to understand the nature of just
how things work. And feel free to tell me if
I'm just a weird guy and no one else is
like this. But I found that laziness is a powerful
(10:30):
tool to turn off negative things in your life. Meaning
you may have bad ideas and you know they're bad ideas.
They may be impulses to do the wrong thing, knowing
that it is wrong, but whatever something inside you says,
just go do it anyway.
Speaker 6 (10:43):
Who cares. But I found that if you lean on laziness.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
To say I just I don't feel like doing it,
it makes those thoughts go away. And it's probably the
wrong way to look at it. But I think laziness
could be used as a tool in some ways.
Speaker 5 (10:59):
Ryan, and might be able to but I cannot come
up with any for you. I'm sorry.
Speaker 6 (11:05):
Go ahead and tell me that it's a bad idea.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
I mean, you want to be able to defeat certain
things that pop in there, especially as you live your
life and you're trying to make it better yourself in life.
So let's talk about the pizza fight again. Did that
when you go back and reflect on those things. I'm sorry,
but I'm sure a lot of people listening here they
have those moments when they were kids they reflect back
(11:28):
on these things, or maybe they just kind of, you know,
bury it down and they haven't thought about it. For you,
it was something that was reintroduced and you gave it
a second thought. So can you use moments like that,
and maybe you know people listening here moments like that
and just say to yourself, all right, I can make
something of this and look at where I've come from.
(11:50):
Maybe if we were to take this as one pinpoint
in my life and look at it where I'm in today.
It shows that if we were to pinpoint this very moment,
I'm going to be pretty far away from this in
the future.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
The goal, yeah, I mean, if you picture anything that
you've done or doing, imagine a mirror being held up
to you. Or maybe even better yet, is if someone
videotaped it. Because we were I don't know how old
you are, Ryan, but I'm forty six. When I was
growing up, they didn't have cell phones and cameras everywhere,
and it was a great time to be alive because
(12:20):
you'dn't have to worry about people, you know, making a
video of you in a in a frustrated state, a
drunken state, in college or wherever you might have been.
And so most things were just not there except for
the people that were in that moment. But if you
think about some of the acts of the things that
you've done, or you're doing or might do, how would
you view yourself if you were sitting there in your
house or on your phone watching a video of you.
(12:43):
So if you're in my dad's case watching a video
of you throwing pizza at this you know this disabled kid?
Speaker 4 (12:49):
Essentially, how does that make you feel? Does that make
you want to double down and get a second second pie?
Speaker 5 (12:54):
You don't throw that pizza too, or just stop what
you're doing and be completely ashamed of yourself and never
do something like that again. And so a big part
of me is when I'm doing things, I think about that, like,
am I being you know, a jerk? How does this look?
Speaker 4 (13:08):
Am I?
Speaker 1 (13:09):
You know?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Am I doing something because I think I'm right? Or
is it actually right? And just how would this be
viewed by somebody else? Because we have our perception of
what we think makes sense, and it's not always right.
So when you empathize, which is a powerful another basic tool,
you could really start to see things in your life
from a different perspective someone else's and maybe realize, you
know what, I shouldn't be doing this. So that can
(13:31):
be certainly helpful. But you know, we talk about our
minds or such powerful places, but for some people it's
a wasteland. And if you can get rid of some
of that junk that cluttered that noise, clear out a bit,
you can start to plant some seeds, and you can
plant whatever kind of seeds you want hopefully positive seeds,
and when you do, those seeds can then sprout into
very positive harvests which can can result in success, happiness, fulfillment,
(13:56):
becoming a more positive person, all.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
This good stuff.
Speaker 6 (13:59):
What about fulfillment for someone else?
Speaker 2 (14:01):
So let's say you're a parent and you want the
best for your kids, and you know, I know that
you as an individual, you should also look at it
as a personal way. You want to be able to
develop yourself. You want to be able to better yourself,
and if you could put yourself in a better position,
you should be able to then in turn help the
position of your kids. But let's look at it as
(14:22):
maybe your purpose is to help your kids. Can you
look at it in that standpoint, as in, I'm going
to better myself so I can use this in a
way to better them.
Speaker 5 (14:31):
Yeah, I think you can provide frameworks. And the whole
underlying framework framework of my book is the three p's
or are the three p's, And it's in the subtitle
how to experience the Power of Living on by discovering
your potential, passion and purpose.
Speaker 4 (14:48):
And if you want to help a kid, or your kid, or.
Speaker 5 (14:51):
Yourself, you have to try to fulfill your potential, whatever
that is, right, whatever your sky's the limit is, and
your passion is the interesting part, and I break the
book down in three parts. The potential is the exciting part,
because like, what is your potential?
Speaker 4 (15:08):
You know, to me, that's just an exciting question.
Speaker 5 (15:10):
You know who, like someone listening tonight can be someone
of significant importance in this world, maybe a bunch of
people can.
Speaker 4 (15:17):
I just find that exciting.
Speaker 5 (15:19):
Passion is the interesting part because whatever makes you excited
and gives you an adrenaline rush and you jump out
of bed, you know, and it could be something ridiculously silly,
But everyone has passion, and some people don't know what
that is. So you want to figure out what you're
passionate about, and it's usually there's usually a connection in
your past. Things you've done, things you've gravitated towards in
(15:41):
the past when you were a kid, you had more time,
you didn't have the obligations of the real world so much.
You did things you were passionate about. So it's interesting
to see what that is. And then the third pay
is purpose, and everybody should have a defined purpose of
why they're doing everything, and so that's it's the framework.
(16:01):
And so like for my kids, like, I don't I
don't care what they what their job title is. I
don't care where they go to college, even though we're
looking at that a lot. For my son, I just
want them to realize that they can fulfill their potential,
reach their potential. And the little secret is once you
reach that, you realize that there's even more of it
to go.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
It's kind of unlimited.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Listen to more Coast to Coast AM every weeknight at
one am Eastern, and go to Coast to coastam dot
com for more
Now here's a highlight from coast to coast AM on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Maybe I should look at this in the opposite type
of way, and maybe this is not what these type
of books are meant for. But what are some things
I shouldn't be doing? Like, let's look at the don'ts.
Do you have any advice for they stay away from
this type of stuff because it's not helping you.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
Well, I would say, don't use the book to prop.
Speaker 4 (00:24):
Up a table.
Speaker 5 (00:26):
You know, I would say, don't use it to warm
your house in the fireplace.
Speaker 6 (00:31):
Uh huh.
Speaker 4 (00:32):
But but no, I don't have a lot of don'ts.
Speaker 5 (00:35):
This This book is not designed to beat people over
the head.
Speaker 4 (00:38):
But you know, don't do this, do that.
Speaker 5 (00:40):
It's telling my story of when I have lived on
and when I have lived off and the realization that
everybody has.
Speaker 4 (00:49):
This switch in their brain. And you hear people talk
about it.
Speaker 5 (00:51):
Sometimes it's from the podium after a game, you know,
a basketball or football game. Hey, you know I flipped
the switch or the switch went off, or I had a.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Moment or epiphany.
Speaker 5 (01:02):
It's that switching your brain and your brain itself that
drives everything from there.
Speaker 4 (01:07):
You know, your brain drives your body.
Speaker 5 (01:09):
Whoever your thoughts are is where kind of the rest
of you gravitates towards. So hopefully you don't have negative
thoughts and gravitate that way. But the idea is to
use this switch that you have, use the energy, the passion,
whatever your purpose is, towards something positive because if people
(01:29):
do that, I just think this world will be a
better place. People will be less miserable, people will be
happier and feel that they're getting more out of their life.
They're getting their money's worth, so to speak. So that's
really the main focus there. But when I talk about
on versus OP, that's the whole life switch concept, and
that's why I named it that because I think it's
(01:50):
something you could really imagine in your head like a switch.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
You can literally flip it on and off.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
And I'm not someone to tell you that I'm always on.
I usually am, but I've had moments where I've been
major lay off.
Speaker 6 (02:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Well, one thing you mentioned about negative thoughts, and it
reminded me of when I was taking my driver's lessons
when I was, you know, fifteen or whatever it was,
before getting the license at sixteen, and one of the
things they tell you is when you're driving, whatever you're
looking at, you tend to veer towards.
Speaker 6 (02:21):
Is that what negative thoughts are like?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
If that's what you're paying attention to, If that's what
you're thinking about, naturally you're going to veer towards it.
As a person, is that what you're finding one hundred percent?
Speaker 5 (02:31):
And it's it's negative or positive, it works both ways.
So yeah, if you're if you're looking at something, you
are going to start to shift that way.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
And if it's negativity that.
Speaker 5 (02:42):
You find popping up a lot, I think a lot
of people view to the they skew to the negative.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
I do sometimes myself. I don't know why just.
Speaker 5 (02:50):
Is that way, but I almost view it like a
song that pops song You can just skip it, you know,
you can give that song a thumbs down or just
literally skip that song.
Speaker 4 (03:00):
And so why can you not? Why can you not
skip a thought in your brain?
Speaker 5 (03:04):
It's a nope, not going to listen to this and
just skip it right over it.
Speaker 4 (03:09):
And I encourage people to.
Speaker 5 (03:10):
Do that and to think about think about it in
that way that you don't have to listen to this
stuff if you don't want to.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
What I've noticed too, and we've learned a lot about
social media in the last five years, especially since the
congressional hearings and a lot of people raising awareness to
the manipulation that goes on, particularly to young people, which
is very troubling, and you start to realize that miserable
has a market. So if you are having a problem
(03:38):
with something, these social media websites, these tech companies can
pick up on that and they use that as a
marketing plot point to you, as it is just one
extra thing in your profile that they know they can
advertise to, which is kind of a shame if you
think about it, and it's unfortunate. So how can you
tell if something or someone is taking advantage of you?
Meaning how can you tell that you know something may
(04:03):
be holding you back that you don't know is holding
you back. It may seem invisible, but I know that
there are things out there that do have that effect
on people.
Speaker 5 (04:13):
Yeah, you're right about that, and it's manipulation and it's financed,
and it's terrible because it gets people that their lowest oftentimes,
And that's another benefit of spending time with yourself. You
know you're not going to have any AI or or
any kind of marketing. Behavioral marketing go through your own head.
I mean, do you have advertisements in your own brain?
Of course not, and so you.
Speaker 3 (04:33):
Need you, you know, you need to really unplug to
know for sure that these are real thoughts through yours
and not being piped or fed in there.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
And that's an important thing.
Speaker 5 (04:47):
But you know, I almost got rid of all my
social media before I launched the book because I was
so tired of it and the thoughts that I put
in my head and the things I was looking at,
the things I was, you know, scrolling through. It. Used
to tell my kids, if you find me on LinkedIn,
and I've reached the height of boredom, and please shake
me out of the state. And now I'm using LinkedIn
all the time to promote the book. And it's because
(05:09):
of that. You know, if you want to get your
book out in the world, or anything out in the world,
you've got to get out in the world. And these
days most things are done on mine in the computer world,
and it drives me crazy.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
But that's just where we're at. You know.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
It's like we joke around with all this AI and
TEX stuff. It's like, have these people not seen the
terminator and the sky network or whatever.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
It was called.
Speaker 5 (05:31):
So we're walking walking right into this here, and you know,
what are you going to do? But when you unplug
from all this stuff, you really can find those emotions,
those feelings.
Speaker 4 (05:42):
You know, if it's negative feelings, what do you do
with that? What can you do with that? What shouldn't
you do?
Speaker 5 (05:48):
And you usually have emotions to say, well, Okay, I
want to be like this or I don't want to
be like that. Like I give you a short example,
like I had an abusive father that my mom pulled
us away from, and I, for whatever reason, I didn't
have any training. I just decided to use that as
an example.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
Of who I didn't want to be and who.
Speaker 5 (06:09):
You know, wanted to be nothing Like I wanted to
be the best dad I could be, and I would
like the.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Personal plug for myself.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
Think I've done that in my own little world here,
and that's just something I went through. But I think
for everyone else, you go through something bad. Okay, Yah
had no surprise. Everybody does. But do you want to
perpetuate that or do you want to cut that and
end that and never have that be that way again?
And I was talking to my brother with Thanksgiving. You know,
my father was so bad. I didn't even know so
(06:37):
much of it because I was two years younger. But
my brother was telling me the story about my dad
started a pizza fight and the mall years ago. And
I remember the pizza fight because when two grown men
are throwing pizza at each other, you you know, you think.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
You remember that. And my brother said, do you remember
how that started?
Speaker 5 (06:53):
Us said, well, like, the guy bumped into our dad, right,
and he goes, no, there's this kid on crutches and
he was coming and our dad was coming and our
dad didn't move. And subsequently, the kid with crutches hits
my dad's pizza, knocks it over and he starts yelling
at this kid on crutches and his parents, and then
he throws the first.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Life and it's just like how could Like it was
years later and not even remembering that part of it,
I was like embarrassed to be this guy's kid.
Speaker 5 (07:21):
You know, I don't know who the kid was in
the mall and all that, but I'm like, how can
people be so rotten? And again, I just decided I
didn't want to be like this guy at all. And
I think again, for a lot of people, you've gone
through something. It could be tragic, traumatic, but you can
use that as a catalyst in one way or the other,
either to just be like that, you know, be like
your parent in this example, or be nothing like it.
(07:43):
And again, it's when you're aware and plugged into that
moment you can make these choices, these decisions. And I
think life is a series of choices, you know, I
mentioned option A versus option B. I think generally there's
two broad choices of how you can take things, and
I think people know what the best choices, but it's
sometimes not the easiest.
Speaker 6 (08:03):
I have to say, a pizza fight is so absurd.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I shouldn't be laughing at that, but I never encountered
a food fight in real life. Just the concept and
the visual is humorous to me, not the trauma that
comes with it as a child. But you know what
I found too, it's kind of interesting when you emphasize
tuning in and taking the time really looking into yourself.
(08:28):
But there's so much noise that goes on in the
world that you mentioned that the first part. If you're
in your own mind, hopefully the ads don't start creeping in.
It's only a matter of time before it becomes more direct.
But let's say I'm sitting quietly and I'm going to
think about things like, oh, I haven't had a mcribb
in a while, and because an advertisement will creep in
(08:51):
and like oh yeah, they find ways to get into
your brain if you like it or not. So how
do you turn off that static, that noise when it
starts to creep in? Is there some sort of mechanism
you can use to, I guess, get yourself off that mindset?
Speaker 5 (09:08):
Well, you know, in the beginning, when you first, you know,
take that time, You're gonna have all kind of thoughts,
probably some weird ones like mcribs flying by and other
things like that. But when you do it, you start
to get used to it. You also realize that you
can decide to sort of go with certain thoughts or
say nope, not going that path.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
And I do that sometimes. I wake up.
Speaker 5 (09:26):
I try to be very positive and grateful for everything
in my life. When I first get out of bed
on my phone is nowhere near my bed. I wake
up before I even get out. I open my eyes
and I lay there and I think about these things
that I'm thankful for. Grateful for And sometimes I start
thinking about business, I start thinking about some of my
clients or the market or whatever, and I.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Just kind of said, nope, nope, keep going, like I'm
not going to grab on to you and ride you out.
Speaker 5 (09:52):
So it's grabbing on to certain thoughts and going for
a ride or just deciding no, I'm not going to
take that one. It's kind of like deciding when your
body's or surfing is you're going to ride awave or not.
Ye know, I'm gonna let that one go. And that's
what you want to do with these thoughts. Let some
go rite others.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
I also find this, and this is going to sound weird,
but in my own life is I pull examples of
me as a way to understand the nature of just
how things work. And feel free to tell me if
I'm just a weird guy and no one else is
like this. But I found that laziness is a powerful
(10:30):
tool to turn off negative things in your life. Meaning
you may have bad ideas and you know they're bad ideas.
They may be impulses to do the wrong thing, knowing
that it is wrong, but whatever something inside you says,
just go do it anyway.
Speaker 6 (10:43):
Who cares. But I found that if you lean on laziness.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
To say I just I don't feel like doing it,
it makes those thoughts go away. And it's probably the
wrong way to look at it. But I think laziness
could be used as a tool in some ways.
Speaker 5 (10:59):
Ryan, and might be able to but I cannot come
up with any for you. I'm sorry.
Speaker 6 (11:05):
Go ahead and tell me that it's a bad idea.
Speaker 2 (11:07):
I mean, you want to be able to defeat certain
things that pop in there, especially as you live your
life and you're trying to make it better yourself in life.
So let's talk about the pizza fight again. Did that
when you go back and reflect on those things. I'm sorry,
but I'm sure a lot of people listening here they
have those moments when they were kids they reflect back
(11:28):
on these things, or maybe they just kind of, you know,
bury it down and they haven't thought about it. For you,
it was something that was reintroduced and you gave it
a second thought. So can you use moments like that,
and maybe you know people listening here moments like that
and just say to yourself, all right, I can make
something of this and look at where I've come from.
(11:50):
Maybe if we were to take this as one pinpoint
in my life and look at it where I'm in today.
It shows that if we were to pinpoint this very moment,
I'm going to be pretty far away from this in
the future.
Speaker 5 (12:00):
The goal, yeah, I mean, if you picture anything that
you've done or doing, imagine a mirror being held up
to you. Or maybe even better yet, is if someone
videotaped it. Because we were I don't know how old
you are, Ryan, but I'm forty six. When I was
growing up, they didn't have cell phones and cameras everywhere,
and it was a great time to be alive because
(12:20):
you'dn't have to worry about people, you know, making a
video of you in a in a frustrated state, a
drunken state, in college or wherever you might have been.
And so most things were just not there except for
the people that were in that moment. But if you
think about some of the acts of the things that
you've done, or you're doing or might do, how would
you view yourself if you were sitting there in your
house or on your phone watching a video of you.
(12:43):
So if you're in my dad's case watching a video
of you throwing pizza at this you know this disabled kid?
Speaker 4 (12:49):
Essentially, how does that make you feel? Does that make
you want to double down and get a second second pie?
Speaker 5 (12:54):
You don't throw that pizza too, or just stop what
you're doing and be completely ashamed of yourself and never
do something like that again. And so a big part
of me is when I'm doing things, I think about that, like,
am I being you know, a jerk? How does this look?
Speaker 4 (13:08):
Am I?
Speaker 1 (13:09):
You know?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Am I doing something because I think I'm right? Or
is it actually right? And just how would this be
viewed by somebody else? Because we have our perception of
what we think makes sense, and it's not always right.
So when you empathize, which is a powerful another basic tool,
you could really start to see things in your life
from a different perspective someone else's and maybe realize, you
know what, I shouldn't be doing this. So that can
(13:31):
be certainly helpful. But you know, we talk about our
minds or such powerful places, but for some people it's
a wasteland. And if you can get rid of some
of that junk that cluttered that noise, clear out a bit,
you can start to plant some seeds, and you can
plant whatever kind of seeds you want hopefully positive seeds,
and when you do, those seeds can then sprout into
very positive harvests which can can result in success, happiness, fulfillment,
(13:56):
becoming a more positive person, all.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
This good stuff.
Speaker 6 (13:59):
What about fulfillment for someone else?
Speaker 2 (14:01):
So let's say you're a parent and you want the
best for your kids, and you know, I know that
you as an individual, you should also look at it
as a personal way. You want to be able to
develop yourself. You want to be able to better yourself,
and if you could put yourself in a better position,
you should be able to then in turn help the
position of your kids. But let's look at it as
(14:22):
maybe your purpose is to help your kids. Can you
look at it in that standpoint, as in, I'm going
to better myself so I can use this in a
way to better them.
Speaker 5 (14:31):
Yeah, I think you can provide frameworks. And the whole
underlying framework framework of my book is the three p's
or are the three p's, And it's in the subtitle
how to experience the Power of Living on by discovering
your potential, passion and purpose.
Speaker 4 (14:48):
And if you want to help a kid, or your kid, or.
Speaker 5 (14:51):
Yourself, you have to try to fulfill your potential, whatever
that is, right, whatever your sky's the limit is, and
your passion is the interesting part, and I break the
book down in three parts. The potential is the exciting part,
because like, what is your potential?
Speaker 4 (15:08):
You know, to me, that's just an exciting question.
Speaker 5 (15:10):
You know who, like someone listening tonight can be someone
of significant importance in this world, maybe a bunch of
people can.
Speaker 4 (15:17):
I just find that exciting.
Speaker 5 (15:19):
Passion is the interesting part because whatever makes you excited
and gives you an adrenaline rush and you jump out
of bed, you know, and it could be something ridiculously silly,
But everyone has passion, and some people don't know what
that is. So you want to figure out what you're
passionate about, and it's usually there's usually a connection in
your past. Things you've done, things you've gravitated towards in
(15:41):
the past when you were a kid, you had more time,
you didn't have the obligations of the real world so much.
You did things you were passionate about. So it's interesting
to see what that is. And then the third pay
is purpose, and everybody should have a defined purpose of
why they're doing everything, and so that's it's the framework.
(16:01):
And so like for my kids, like, I don't I
don't care what they what their job title is. I
don't care where they go to college, even though we're
looking at that a lot. For my son, I just
want them to realize that they can fulfill their potential,
reach their potential. And the little secret is once you
reach that, you realize that there's even more of it
to go.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
It's kind of unlimited.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Listen to more Coast to Coast AM every weeknight at
one am Eastern, and go to Coast to coastam dot
com for more
The Best of Coast to Coast AM News
Host
George Noory
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