Battleship Tricks

Becca and Tanya are back from our iHeartRadio Jingle Ball and have a ton of behind the scenes stories! 

Becca spills some major secrets about the Bachelor Mansion about what happens when the mics are off. 

Plus, would Tanya and Becca be better at Survivor… or Squid Game??

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Scrubbing in with Tilly and Tanya rap An iHeartRadio podcast.
Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
Yes we are, my girl, my girl.

Speaker 1 (00:18):
Yeah, you've been staring at me with that look in
your eye since I walked in.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
I just am so loving you lately.

Speaker 1 (00:25):
I don't know why I have just done anything to
deserve that.

Speaker 3 (00:30):
Yes, you have, and you are and it's just your
essence and your being and who you are. So I
don't know why you're so squeamish about it, like accept
the love except the love I want to give you
and show you.

Speaker 1 (00:41):
I accept it. I just am like, why out of nowhere,
I haven't done like I haven't. We haven't spent time
together in like an intimate setting, so I'm just trying to.

Speaker 2 (00:53):
Gage it very intimate lately, quite frankly.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
Not that intimate.

Speaker 2 (00:59):
Hell, so just like chilling like a villain.

Speaker 3 (01:03):
Okay, yeah, actually no, we're not in our backguard living room, Hags.

Speaker 1 (01:08):
We did have some living room, Hans. Yeah, I have
a Kinker store right now. And let me just tell
you debilitating.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Oh is it on your right side? I can see swollen.

Speaker 1 (01:18):
My whole lift is swollen. I get them so bad
and they're so dramatic, and I was thinking, you know,
I was thinking earlier, I was like, I want to
wish this on my worst end to me, but I
was like, you know what, this would be the perfect
thing to wish because it's not like death, but it's
like pain.

Speaker 2 (01:34):
Yeah, it looks like could I pop it?

Speaker 1 (01:36):
No, you can't pop it.

Speaker 2 (01:38):
It looks poppable, it's not.

Speaker 1 (01:40):
That's just like what don't no, please listening, Please never
try to pop a anchor.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
Sword spoiler alert.

Speaker 1 (01:50):
Yeah, so that's been just really tough. And then Haley
and I went and ate dinner and I was aggressively
eating pasta because it was so good and I bit
it and that's where it went downhill.

Speaker 2 (02:02):
I literally can see it from here.

Speaker 1 (02:04):
So yeah, so every time Haley goes to kiss me,
I'm like, no, like just because the other side of
my mouth.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
You know what you should do?

Speaker 3 (02:12):
Though, Whenever I have a canker swore, I take this
is I'm not a doctor, so just take.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
This just so it's worth just a disclaimer.

Speaker 3 (02:19):
Disclaimer, but it works for me like a charm. Okay,
whenever I have a canker swore, I take a Q
tip and I dip it in warm water, and then
I stick it in a pile of salt, like Himalayan
pink salt, and then I put it right on the
canker swore, and I just hold it there, and I
just hold it there, and I just hold it there
and then I do that like duck. Yeah, but I

(02:40):
do that like two or three times, and then the
next day it's like significantly better.

Speaker 1 (02:45):
So I've heard of this. I have dealt with cankers
like they come when I'm stressed, which I haven't been stressed,
So I don't.

Speaker 2 (02:52):
Know why I'm stressed about let's talk about that.

Speaker 1 (02:53):
No, I'm not stressed, but you know what I think happened.
I've been baking and using like so much sugar and
like butter and flour, and I think and I've been
eating cookies like the literal cookie.

Speaker 2 (03:05):
Monster canker stores from sugar.

Speaker 1 (03:08):
Can you you don't think I don't know. I don't
think so, because I haven't really been stressed, unless it's
like a delayed something from being stressed.

Speaker 4 (03:17):
They're caused by emotional stress, dietary deficiencies, menstrual period.

Speaker 2 (03:22):
Not excessities excessivities.

Speaker 1 (03:26):
Yeah, but I imagine I'm very deficient in nutrients as we
can imagine, as I'm eating like four to five chocolate
chip cookies.

Speaker 4 (03:37):
For meal, consuming a lot of sugar foods. That's on there,
totally feeding me facts about canker.

Speaker 1 (03:46):
Thank you Mark for the canker facts.

Speaker 5 (03:48):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (03:50):
Yeah, so I think that could be it because I
got on this ever since Thanksgiving all of a sudden,
I'm like a baker. It's just in my it's passion. Yeah,
it's my fixation of the month.

Speaker 3 (04:04):
I guess instead of scrubbing in and we should call
it baking in, baking in.

Speaker 1 (04:09):
It's just like we talked about baking or what.

Speaker 2 (04:12):
Yeah. Yeah, our new recipe of the week could be cute.

Speaker 1 (04:15):
Well, I can't be doing it because it's causing me
kinger saurce.

Speaker 2 (04:19):
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.

Speaker 1 (04:20):
Thank you so much.

Speaker 2 (04:21):
Yeah, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (04:22):
Wow, we had a big weekend, Well you had a
big weekend. Min was pretty fine. That's pretty good.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
It it was a big weekend. And you know what,
I realized.

Speaker 3 (04:33):
What when I and I don't know if it's age,
and I'm just gonna have to chalk it up to age.
I cannot not have a good night's sleep and function
normally the next day, like I had.

Speaker 2 (04:45):
Do you ever get chills when you're really tired?

Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, I get like achy, like I feel like I'm
going to get sick.

Speaker 3 (04:50):
I had the chills all weekend long, like just like
I was frigid all weekend because I was just so tired.

Speaker 1 (04:56):
It was actually pretty cold in Malibu too, so I
think jingle Ball.

Speaker 3 (05:01):
So yeah, it's a combination of all things. But I
was like, wow, I've never I've never had like the
chills for a full weekend.

Speaker 2 (05:08):
But totally worth it.

Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah, I mean totally worth it for the chills.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:13):
I loved your jingle Ball outfit. I thought you got
this stylist.

Speaker 3 (05:17):
I know, Becca Goes did Brian style you. I was like,
this is a Tanya rad special baby.

Speaker 1 (05:22):
I love that designer resiic.

Speaker 2 (05:25):
I don't know how that's it by.

Speaker 1 (05:29):
Ariel, who is a designer. Aril Resik at a dinner
that I went to and we were just talking and
she was like, oh, yeah, I have a clothing line
and I was like, oh what is it? And she
told me and I would I would always see it
on my feed and I was like, oh my gosh,
I love your stuff. So when you when you wore
it and I saw you tag, I was like, there

(05:50):
she is.

Speaker 2 (05:51):
There, there she is.

Speaker 3 (05:52):
And I was going to actually get it in white,
because you know, like jingle Ball, So I did it
in green, but and then I found the US on Amazon.

Speaker 2 (06:03):
I mean I literally typed in green.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
I think I typed in like Emerald green heels, and
this was like one of the front I was like
crossing my fingers that it would match, and it matched perfectly.

Speaker 2 (06:12):
And they were very comfortable too.

Speaker 1 (06:14):
You gonna ask were they of comfort?

Speaker 2 (06:15):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (06:16):
I mean I wouldn't say like, no, heel to me
is like of comfort, Like it's not like I'm walking around.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
Like a hookah.

Speaker 3 (06:21):
But hokkah, hookah, hakka, hokah.

Speaker 1 (06:26):
She's gone downhill.

Speaker 2 (06:28):
It's not like I'm walking around a hookah. But for heels,
they were very comfortable. Great, Well, you looked great, Thank
you so much.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
How was jingle Ball super super cute?

Speaker 3 (06:39):
Do you know who I'd love to have on the
podcast if he's around, although not really sure where he's
living these days.

Speaker 1 (06:47):
Let me guess, did he perform yes? Flow Rider?

Speaker 5 (06:52):
No?

Speaker 1 (06:56):
He I don't even know who.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
Because I got's flow Rider and that's.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
All Rodrigo and Brina Carpenter and flow Rider.

Speaker 3 (07:05):
No Easton gotta guess uh a Jr.

Speaker 2 (07:11):
Nope, but close.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
I don't close.

Speaker 3 (07:15):
I remember who played all right, I'm just gonna tell
you now Horn Oh we love now.

Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (07:22):
I haven't seen him since before the pandemic. Oh yeah,
Like it's been a minute. And we were in the
hallway together and walking down we like walked out of
the doors at the same time, and he goes, I
hair congratulations on order, and I was like, you are
the cutest thing in the whole world.

Speaker 1 (07:40):
I weirdly feel like I feel like he's so massive,
and yet he feels attainable for our show.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
I think so too.

Speaker 1 (07:46):
Something to work on.

Speaker 2 (07:47):
Something to work on.

Speaker 3 (07:48):
Although twenty twenty three was the year for Patrick Dempsey
and it's coming really to the end.

Speaker 1 (07:53):
I have a strong feeling, not to be negative or
Debbie Downer, that we're not going to get we will
not have him in doing twenty three.

Speaker 3 (08:00):
You know what, I don't like that attitude. I know
you want it up until December thirty. First, I'm gonna
hold out hope.

Speaker 1 (08:09):
I love that about you.

Speaker 2 (08:11):
Thank you, and if not, maybe we get a Patrick
dempsty impersonator or something.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
I want the real thing.

Speaker 2 (08:18):
I want the real thing too.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
I sit here and stare at him and marvel at him.

Speaker 3 (08:23):
Yeah, but now Horn was super super cute and actually
he was watching. At the end of the night, Olivia
Rodrigo ended the show she like closed, you know, like
the headliner, and he was standing on the side of
the stage watching her performance, which I love when artists
watch other artists perform.

Speaker 2 (08:40):
I think it's like the cutest thing ever.

Speaker 1 (08:42):
You think he was trying to shoot a shot.

Speaker 3 (08:44):
Uh No, I don't think he was trying to shoot
a shot. I think it was just like chillin' okay,
but it was so cute. Is Nil Horn single?

Speaker 2 (08:53):
I don't know what about him. For Raquel, I'd be
into it.

Speaker 3 (08:58):
Yeah, but I do feel somebody's probably tried to set
them up already at some point. I don't know for sure,
but I feel like that path might have already been.

Speaker 1 (09:08):
Okay, I'm just over here trying to match make where
I can end her text? Have you everyone I asked
her about She's like.

Speaker 4 (09:15):
No, she's pretty pick I believe he's in a relationship.
I was gonna say, I feel like I have designer
shoe buyer.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
Okay, congrats Nia. We will not be trying to set
her up with our friend Raquel. I mean, I'm up
with our friend.

Speaker 3 (09:31):
No, we will not be trying to set them upright,
It's still cute.

Speaker 2 (09:34):
Nonetheless, what was.

Speaker 1 (09:36):
Who was your favorite performer?

Speaker 2 (09:38):
Alvia Rodrigo?

Speaker 3 (09:40):
So you know Olivia is managed by Aleen Kashishian. If
you don't know who Aleen Kashishian is, she is a
manager to the stars. So I met her because she's
Selena gomezz.

Speaker 1 (09:51):
Oh yeah, I was like, I heard that same.

Speaker 3 (09:53):
But she's so badass, like she always has all these
talks and she's like such a super like women for women,
like female empowerment, just super cool, like she does Paul
Rudd and I want to say she doesn't one with Paltrow.

Speaker 1 (10:09):
Two mm hmm. But she's just like super and.

Speaker 3 (10:12):
Jennifer Anison, she's just like badass.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
Okay, well, I feel like you have her number.

Speaker 2 (10:18):
I do have her number.

Speaker 1 (10:20):
So you're telling me we're is that one degree from
Jennifer Anderson?

Speaker 6 (10:24):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (10:25):
Where's Yeah?

Speaker 2 (10:28):
Uh, I can say the same things to you. Where's
Sophia bush At? You got her in your phone book.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
I don't have her phone number.

Speaker 2 (10:34):
What do you have a person?

Speaker 1 (10:35):
Nothing? You don't have Haley has.

Speaker 3 (10:37):
Her number, you don't have her DMS, No, don't talk
via nothing, events always each other.

Speaker 2 (10:45):
Jennifer Andison does feel like a bit of a stretch.

Speaker 3 (10:51):
Okay, okay, but I'll think about it, think about it.

Speaker 4 (10:56):
I've been soft floating the idea to Sophia Bush. I
just want to know, oh, because I do have her number.
But our texts are all Hi, Sophia, can you reboot
your computer? Yes? Thank you. That's that's our text.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
Further than I have, much further than I have.

Speaker 4 (11:13):
We wish each other happy birthday. But that's again as
far as it goes. But when we do the podcast,
I've told her like, oh, you know, hey, I work
with Beckatilly. She has nothing but good things to say
about you. She has a really fun podcast, and she's like,
oh cool, that's so sweet. It feels good, feels like
we're moving in the right direction right now.

Speaker 1 (11:31):
I am tired of being the podcast where people say
oh cool, fine, but them being like, oh my gosh,
would you connect us? I'd love to be on that podcast.
What have you said that about?

Speaker 2 (11:47):
Call her? Daddy. Oh, like you'd want to be on
call her daddy.

Speaker 1 (11:50):
I would love to have her on our podcast. I'd
love to be on her podcast. Yeah. Yeah, she's also
I don't listen to podcasts.

Speaker 3 (11:58):
See, That's the thing, Like, I feel like there's not
very many podcasts that people would say, oh, I'd love.

Speaker 2 (12:02):
To be on that podcast.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
I think there are really, Like I feel like chicks
in the office people would say that Lady Gang.

Speaker 3 (12:12):
Yeah, Lady Gang Che's office yet. Okay, but it's not
like you're not saying a ton of podcasts.

Speaker 1 (12:19):
I'm not a podcast listener though. Oh, I think there's
probably many.

Speaker 3 (12:24):
Yeah, Like I don't even know how that'll go down,
because I've never actually I have Allen's number, but I've
never actually texted her.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
Hey, can I have Jennifer Aniston on my podcast?

Speaker 1 (12:31):
Just yeah, let's get better, let's like elevate our podcast.
Before we go to dinner, fran and.

Speaker 3 (12:36):
I said, okay, well maybe Olivia Rodrigo. So the reason
why I was saying that was because we were backstage,
like behind the stage, about to introduce Olivia Oldrigo and
Aleen runs up to me. She gives me a hug,
She's like, hey, how are you? And she's like, have
you ever met Olivia? And I'm like no, and I haven't.

Speaker 2 (12:51):
She was come over here. She's literally about to perform.

Speaker 3 (12:53):
She has like her in years in and Allen introduces
me to Olivia and she could not have been cuter.
It gives me a hug, super super cute, literally about
to perform and is like oh yeah, but I'm just
like to me, Aleen is like, I would love to
have a leen Maybe we get a leen On as
a guest, because she has these like amazing stories of

(13:15):
how she started such incredible brands, like these huge brands
and manages these like massive, massive names. She's a really
cool story and I think she'd be really empowering and
insightful for our listeners because I've heard her speak and
I was like moved.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
I'll be honest, I might be more interested in having
someone like Eileen as opposed to one of the celebrities
to get the inside scoop of like not about them,
but like how you get into that position. Yeah, But
who was her first big celebrity right?

Speaker 2 (13:45):
And I want to say.

Speaker 3 (13:46):
She started it with like a big firm and then
she created her own company.

Speaker 2 (13:54):
I think in her forties.

Speaker 3 (13:57):
So yeah, it's like a pretty cool she has a
really cool story, and maybe I reach out to her
and get her on as a guest, because I do.
I think she has some like really cool and interesting stories.

Speaker 1 (14:08):
Great, that's a good goal. I like that.

Speaker 2 (14:10):
Okay, great.

Speaker 1 (14:12):
So then we had we had jingle Ball or you
had jingle Ball. And then there was the iHeart Christmas Party,
which was at.

Speaker 3 (14:21):
Day holiday party. What holiday party? We don't exclude Hanukkah or.

Speaker 1 (14:27):
Oh sorry, okay. It was the Christmas plus many other
holiday party the holiday party for iHeart And it was
at No Boo Malibu and it was We did it
there last year and it was so fun and this
year was like even bigger. Like we walked in and
I was like, what rams it was? It was a

(14:49):
packed house party time. Yeah, but it was super fun.
Easton and Mark both were there.

Speaker 4 (14:56):
That was very exciting. We did not go last year,
but this year we went, Yeah other's dates and it
was really fine.

Speaker 1 (15:01):
I felt like Mark really raged this weekend.

Speaker 2 (15:04):
He did didn't you Mark out and about more in
my life out.

Speaker 1 (15:09):
In a boot in a boat and he got his
daughter a photo with Olivia Rodrigo and then uh he
got a Fallen. I literally saw that photo and I
was like, did I miss something? Are they friends? Like
it looked like a photo that you take with your
friend because they were post.

Speaker 3 (15:26):
Jimmy Fallon was totally down to do whatever. Like I
got a picture of Jimmy Fallen too, because he was
just backstage taking selfies with people, romping around, like just smiley,
so approachable, like you know, like sometimes when artists and
stuff are backstage, they're kind of being like walked to
and fro, kind of like don't look at me.

Speaker 2 (15:46):
He could not have been the opposite.

Speaker 3 (15:48):
He was like looking around, smiling, just like happy to
be there.

Speaker 1 (15:52):
It was the people's choice, yes, of jingle Ball.

Speaker 3 (15:56):
Yes he was the people's choice of jingle Ball, but yeah.
One of Mark's daughters got a photo with Olivia and
the other one was watching Ajar, and Mark was like, Hey,
Olivia's going to be backstage, so you can meet her
potentially not one hundred percent, or stay and watch AJR.
So one of the daughters went with him for the

(16:17):
chance to meet Olivia and the other one stayed to
watch Ajar, And then the one that went to go
see Olivia met her and got a photo with her, and,
like I know, is.

Speaker 4 (16:27):
A risky taken life.

Speaker 1 (16:28):
It really is all about the risk it is it is.

Speaker 2 (16:33):
I would have taken the risk too.

Speaker 4 (16:35):
You can see Ajar again. I'm sorry AJF.

Speaker 5 (16:38):
They love Ajar, and I do think she slightly regrets it,
but also she might have regretted missing Ajar.

Speaker 1 (16:44):
Wow, you think she would have regretted missing Ajr. She
had met Olivia.

Speaker 5 (16:48):
I'm glad she did, only because if it would have
been Ali and her friend and Brooklyn, it would have
not been the moment Brooklyn got to have the one
on one time with Olivia. That's a real gift her
sister gave heard. I'm trying to tell my oldest to
focus on that she was a giver.

Speaker 1 (17:05):
Yeah, yeah, it'd be upset.

Speaker 5 (17:08):
It was a fantastic weekend. Jingle Ball was one of
the true highlights of my nearly twenty years with iHeartRadio.
It was phenomenal. And then Saturday and I had such
a blast. It's so great to see Robbie and Haley,
and of course Ben Higgins and Dean Angler and Jared Haben.
These are my favorite people, so it was great. It
was a great, great weekend.

Speaker 1 (17:25):
Yeah, it was really fun to have you guys there.
And everyone Eastern posted the photo and Mark is holding
a glass of water and everyone was like, I know,
that's water in Mark's glass. They're like the scrubbers. No,
that's water in Mark's glass.

Speaker 5 (17:41):
That's hilarious, And of course it was. Yes, I had
many waters that night. You got to be holding something.

Speaker 1 (17:47):
Yeah, it is true. It's like a security, just like
having a drink in your hand.

Speaker 2 (17:51):
I love having a drink in my hand.

Speaker 1 (17:53):
We both do.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
I love it.

Speaker 1 (17:56):
We love having a drink in our hand. I had
two bodies.

Speaker 2 (18:00):
Uh huh.

Speaker 1 (18:01):
I was fine.

Speaker 2 (18:01):
Actually no, we drink at all on jingle Ball.

Speaker 3 (18:05):
I drink yeah on Saturday, and I was I think
I maybe blacked out a little bit.

Speaker 2 (18:15):
Was just the whole time. Yeah yeah, no, not really.

Speaker 3 (18:18):
I didn't black out, but I woke up on Sunday
and I was like, I am a hungover.

Speaker 1 (18:22):
Well, I also think that your body you were just
like in go go go mo, so you're probably Sunday you.

Speaker 2 (18:26):
Were like just able to release.

Speaker 1 (18:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (18:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (18:30):
But the thing is, I love a Leachi Martini. It's
like my favorite drink, and not everywhere can do it right.
Like sometimes they use Leachi liqueur, which is like not
the same vibe. So when a Leachi martini is done right,
I can suck them down.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
Can you explain what's in a Leitchi martini?

Speaker 3 (18:47):
To be honest, I don't know, but I think it's
just vodka and Leachi juice.

Speaker 2 (18:53):
It's like a it's a martini. Yeah, fresh leachy juice.

Speaker 3 (18:56):
And then they like put like you know, they put
like an olive for a martini, they do lechi so
it's like.

Speaker 2 (19:00):
Sweeter m It's delicious.

Speaker 1 (19:03):
I feel like Robbie uh introduced you to the martini
world because.

Speaker 2 (19:09):
You were at girl never a martini girl. Well he
does like a crazy.

Speaker 3 (19:13):
Gin martini with the two olives, two onions and a twist,
a little splash of removeth I don't even know what
I'm ordering when I say it, but I'm like, this
is the order.

Speaker 1 (19:23):
Wait, what was that?

Speaker 3 (19:24):
It's it's a it's a gin martini, okay, with a
rinse I think you said, like a rinse of remooth
the so it just goes in and out, okay, and
then two olives, two onions in a twist.

Speaker 1 (19:35):
Wow, decadence.

Speaker 3 (19:38):
That's our order. That's very martini tasting. The Leachi martini
tasted like dessert.

Speaker 1 (19:44):
Yeah, I'll try it next time because I I can
imagine every martini I've tasted is not like dessert.

Speaker 3 (19:50):
No, it's like very potent, yeah, very vodka, yeah, very strong.

Speaker 1 (19:56):
Robbie and I were like sitting closest to the ocean,
so we were like frozen. But there was this funny
photo of us like up against the heater.

Speaker 2 (20:02):
We both like have our hands, so cute.

Speaker 1 (20:06):
And he was funny because they brought out blankets and
I was like, oh, I only need one because Hayley's like, here,
do you need another? I'm okay, and Robbie is freezing.
I was like give it to Robbie and he's like,
I can't take a blanket. I'm a man.

Speaker 2 (20:18):
I was like, oh god, he's a mirror on their mirror.

Speaker 7 (20:22):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (20:23):
He was like shivering and then he finally took it.
He's like, that's really what a man does. Exactly said
I'm cold, and he takes the health given.

Speaker 2 (20:30):
Exactly a modern man.

Speaker 1 (20:32):
A modern man.

Speaker 2 (20:34):
So we actually came to a.

Speaker 3 (20:35):
Discovery at that dinner that I want to get to
when we come back.

Speaker 7 (20:39):
Great tease you know what I'm trying to say.

Speaker 1 (21:00):
All right, we're back. What discovery did you come to?

Speaker 3 (21:04):
So spoiler alert if you are not aware. I am
obsessed with Survivor and I found out on Saturday night
that Dean Belle formerly Dean Anglert wants to be on Survivor.
H like actually legitimately wants to be on the show.

Speaker 2 (21:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:26):
I don't know anybody at CBS except for the girl
behind their instagram, which is pretty good. Yeah, I'm gonna
try dming. I don't really know how that people do
they do you nominate people, do.

Speaker 2 (21:38):
They like apply?

Speaker 1 (21:41):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (21:44):
Watching Dean on Survivor would be top tier television in
my opinion.

Speaker 1 (21:50):
He doesn't want he said, he doesn't want to like
go through an audition process. He just wants them to
come to him and say, like, we want you on
the show. He doesn't want to have to go through
like any like do they have an audition process? No,
but probably like how the Bachelor, it was like you
went and and and then I don't know, tell me, oh, okay,
this is a fun little I don't know if I've

(22:12):
ever told this. Maybe I have. We've had it's been
six years of this podcast heard it.

Speaker 3 (22:18):
I didn't know there was a process. So you sent
in a tape and then they pick you.

Speaker 1 (22:21):
No, no, no, So Laura nominated me.

Speaker 8 (22:24):
Yeah, and I uh like she would always she watched
it like loyally at the time, and she would always
be like, Becca, let's send in a video of you
for the Bachelor.

Speaker 1 (22:35):
And I was like, oh, I'll never do that, you know.
It was very like straight laz, I'm not chasing a man. Hello,
And and so she texted me it was like on
a Tuesday, and she was like, Hey, did you know
that all you have to do to nominate someone for
the Bachelor is send in a paragraph about them in
a photo. And I was kind of like, no, I

(22:56):
didn't know that. And then that weekend I got off
a plane. I was in Chicago, and I do you
remember the Do you remember mag Con? It was like, fortunately,
I've worked read the guy who was like one of
the like started mag Con. I was like, here's you
have one of the founding fathers. I was like his assistant.

(23:17):
And so we were in Chicago and I got off
the plane and I had a voicemail and he was like, Hi,
this is Scott from the Bachelor. Your friend Laura nominated
you and we would love to meet with you. And
so I texted her and I'm like I just got
a call from the Bachelor and She's like, I literally
did that this week. I can't believe they called you
so fast. And I was like, I'm not doing it.

(23:37):
She was like, you have to do it. So I
got home and I had a call with them, and
then I went up. I came up to La from
San Diego and I met with them. This is in March.

Speaker 2 (23:46):
We didn't start with them, meaning like you meet for
coffee or like I.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
Went to their offices. It was like on the West side,
off like Olympic or something, and yeah, so I met
with them and and they were, you know, they did
the whole thing like we think you'll go very far,
which I'm sure they told everyone that who doesn't leave
that going like I'm my destiny is above like set

(24:10):
ahead of me. So I go, I go home. This
is a March. I every like month or so, they'd
call and be like, hey, just checking in, like are
you still single? Are you still interested in going on
the show? And I was like, yeah, still single, so interested.
And then the final casting weekend came and it was
like all the like having to do like meet with

(24:31):
an investigator, investigator like a private investigator to see if
you had anything in your past. Yeah, and then we
took like photos and stuff, I think, and then yeah,
and then I went home and I waited to hear
if I made it to the final like to go
on the show.

Speaker 2 (24:50):
So it's a meeting, it's like a phone call, a
meeting investigating.

Speaker 1 (24:54):
Some people like it's immediate, like depending on timing of
when they meet. Like Caitlin Bristow actually had put submitted
a tape for the season before ours, and they really
liked her, but they were like, we're gonna wait and
put her on this next season because I think they
wanted her for Crystals because she was so like such good.
She was just like a great person to have on

(25:15):
TV and like him being from like Farmland, Iowa, and
she was this like spunky firecracker and like so funny
and like was.

Speaker 2 (25:23):
The Bachelor before Crystals Wan Pablo, Yeah, Caitlin try to date. Well, yeah,
that she was what she wanted to do. Wow.

Speaker 1 (25:34):
So yeah, it was like a really interesting thing. But
like some people, I think Jordan Rodgers got called like
the week of to go on JoJo's season, Like it
was really fast.

Speaker 3 (25:43):
So Dean could potentially be the Jordan Rogers of sin.

Speaker 1 (25:46):
I think will only do it if he had.

Speaker 2 (25:48):
The Jordan Rogers. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (25:49):
Before we move on from your early Bachelor experience, I
went to the Bachelor mansion for the first time. That
was a thrill and I wanted to you hear all
the only stories about this place, you know, and I
got to like walk the grounds. It was crazy. Do
you remember what room you were in there?

Speaker 1 (26:07):
Yeah? Yeah, So on Chris's season, like when you went
up the stairs, I was to the right, like I
was on the very end.

Speaker 3 (26:15):
Wow, yeah, I stood there are there like rooms with
bunk beds, Like is it like a sleeping porch and
a sorority?

Speaker 1 (26:21):
Oh my gosh. Every room has like multiple bunk beds
in it.

Speaker 2 (26:24):
It's like my dream.

Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah. Yeah, you would have thrived just in that part
of the Bachelor, h you would have thrived. And then
on Ben's season, I was the middle room which had
the bathroom was like the grated, like the grate on
it the mirror. Yeah yeah yeah, that was very challenging.

Speaker 4 (26:39):
Can you just go in that pool? Whenever you want.

Speaker 1 (26:42):
So they don't warm the pool because they don't want
you to get in it because you have to take
your mic off. So if I wanted a break from
the mic, I would be like, I just want to
go dip in the pool. And they were like, it's freezing,
and I'm like, that's okay, it sounds nice, just so
I could like, because you wear like a pack on
your back and you have it on twenty four to
seven and it's so uncomfortable, not when you sleep, but

(27:03):
like you always have it on, and so they would
like the bathroom. Yeah, they were like they were like,
we're not listening to it. I always switched mine off though,
I would always switch myne off. I'm like, this is
so uncomfortable.

Speaker 2 (27:16):
So yeah, and like what if you're like changing your
tampon and like.

Speaker 1 (27:20):
What noises are like changing your pad?

Speaker 2 (27:22):
It's like sh I.

Speaker 1 (27:24):
Mean yeah, I think they probably see in here so
much that they're like.

Speaker 2 (27:28):
Ever, that's like, yeah, inappropriate.

Speaker 1 (27:32):
So uh. And I was telling Ben it was really
weird because on Chris the season, I felt like we
didn't sleep at all, Like we would have to wake
up so early and stay up so late, like five
or six, Like we wouldn't go to sleep till like
four or five from a rose ceremony, and then they'd
have us up like six or seven for like Dick
card stuff.

Speaker 2 (27:51):
I'd be a mess.

Speaker 1 (27:53):
It was brutal. But then on Ben's season they would
I just would go up to the room and I'd
sleep like they would never bother me.

Speaker 2 (28:00):
Interesting.

Speaker 1 (28:01):
So I don't know if they were just like like
she's not gonna give us anything like that entertaining, just
like don't even let her go, let her be.

Speaker 2 (28:07):
Yeah, but I appreciated that.

Speaker 1 (28:10):
But yeah, the Bachelor Mansion lots of memories. It's it's, uh,
it's such an interesting place because it's like so people
were like why won't they paint it? Like why won't
they update it?

Speaker 4 (28:23):
It's it's bizarre, like like all the I mean, it's
clearly just the house they ran out for stuff, and
it's like we got there and like, not only is
there no furniture in there, there's no light fixtures in
a lot of the room. So like after the sun
went down, like I was like using my flashlight to
get into my back by my gosh.

Speaker 1 (28:36):
I was like, gosh, yeah, because they always just have
all the studio lighting. Yeah, I don't even think about that.

Speaker 4 (28:42):
It was it was cool being there, though.

Speaker 1 (28:43):
You know, how are the Golden Bachelor women.

Speaker 4 (28:45):
They were awesome. I I uh, I've met a lot
of Bachelor people in my life. I've never wanted a
picture with one of them until Sandra came in.

Speaker 1 (28:55):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (28:55):
I love Sandra. I got a photo with Sandra. She
was my favorite.

Speaker 1 (28:58):
The fart around the world heard around the world.

Speaker 4 (29:01):
Uh, there's a part where they're playing pickleball and Jesse
Palmer's like, here comes Sandra. She's had two knee replacements
and she's missing her daughter's waiting to be here. And
I started crying from laughing at that. I love Sandra
and she was so cool. All the bachel Golden Bachelor
ladies were awesome. They're so great. I hope they'll get
their own shows. I hope they're all the.

Speaker 3 (29:19):
Bachelorette I do you know what I have pitched the
next Bacherette one of the Golden Bacher contestants.

Speaker 1 (29:26):
I mean, I hope so it was so I felt
like it was such a hit. It would be such
a miss for them to not do it. But my
dream is a bachelor in Paradise, Golden Bachelor in Paradise,
and they're like in Palm Springs or something. Yes, like
you know, like pickleball.

Speaker 4 (29:39):
With the West Palm Beach.

Speaker 1 (29:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (29:42):
Do we have any facts of like how the Golden
Bachelor did? Is that like public knowledge?

Speaker 4 (29:48):
I don't. I'll pull up the exact numbers. But I
remember seeing that the finale was like the best viewed
one since the pandemic. I think, why.

Speaker 1 (29:56):
Did you watch it? Have you? Did you ever watch
it or catch up or anything I did.

Speaker 3 (30:01):
I kept trying, okay, but it's the death that was
hard for me. Every single week hearing about somebody's spouse
dying before I went to sleep.

Speaker 2 (30:11):
I just I just it made me sad.

Speaker 4 (30:13):
Robbie told me that too.

Speaker 3 (30:15):
At Nobuy, he only gave it. I went a lot
further than Robbie. Robbie gave it one episode.

Speaker 4 (30:20):
I was like, everybody dies, bro it comes for.

Speaker 2 (30:22):
Us all it does. Robbie after that, yeah, the storyline.

Speaker 3 (30:26):
He was out after the first episode, but I kept going.
I was like, I'm gonna keep giving it a shop
then because I was like, okay, maybe I'll just get
through Jerry's Gary's, Gary's you know, story and then it
was every date after talking about how they lost their spouse,
and I was like, I can't do it.

Speaker 2 (30:42):
It just makes me too sad.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
Well, spoiler alert, there was a finale and he chose
I know who he chose. Okay, so we're watching it's me,
Haley and Taylor Banks and Hailey is like, heaving, she's
solving so much during the breakup.

Speaker 2 (30:57):
Oh, because he had to send one of them home. Yeah,
I knew who was at.

Speaker 1 (31:01):
Home, Leslie, And it was like painful because it felt
like that heartbreak of that you're so angry and you're
sad and you're embarrassed and you're just like I want
to tell them to get out, but also be like
don't leave, you know, like if you could feel it,
and knowing that she you know, she was like, this
is so embarrassing and it's happening on national television, and

(31:24):
she was like and I'm at least grateful that you
came and told me in my room as opposed to
doing it like at the like making me come and
get dressed up in a fancy dress. And it was
just like pain and he was like sobbing, was like
are you good? Really? Are you good. This show like
wrecked her.

Speaker 3 (31:44):
So yeah, that's what I feel like. I just feel
like I was always sad and like wanting to cry.

Speaker 1 (31:49):
Yeah, well it's pretty upset. I mean it was, but
it was really sweet. It was a great season.

Speaker 2 (31:56):
So is now Leslie like the front runner to be
the Bacheorette?

Speaker 1 (32:00):
So I think Leslie or there was this woman who
went like left kind of early on because her daughter, Yeah,
get Joan. She's like a TikTok star. She does a
lot of tiktoks and people are like Joan for Bachelorette
and she so that I think it would be between
those two, but maybe maybe someone else. Okay, But I
was mostly jealous about the Bachelor Mansion because of the

(32:22):
Golden Bachelor woman in the bachi that looked fun.

Speaker 4 (32:26):
Oh yeah, that I was working. I couldn't do that.

Speaker 2 (32:29):
You couldn't dabble in the bottom.

Speaker 4 (32:31):
I did not know. I saw them practicing.

Speaker 2 (32:34):
No soy sauce for you.

Speaker 4 (32:35):
No soy sauce. I got pizza later, lies true.

Speaker 1 (32:41):
What kind of pizza though?

Speaker 4 (32:42):
Pepperoni?

Speaker 2 (32:44):
Oh my gosh, can I tell you something.

Speaker 3 (32:46):
I've never wanted a piece of pizza more than I
did on Friday night sidebar.

Speaker 2 (32:52):
There's something about it Get one no, because it was
going to a different crew and I just like watched
it go bye, smelled it.

Speaker 4 (32:57):
I was like, when you're working an event like that
and it's a long day, I feel like nothing hits
better than pizza or in and out.

Speaker 3 (33:04):
Yeah after yes, And like I had the Sophie's choice
at the end of the day because I got there,
I really hadn't eaten. I didn't eat anything, and then
when you're at the venue, I'm eating like nuts and chips,
and like I didn't really have a meal.

Speaker 1 (33:16):
Yeah, we got to get to your what you eat
in a day?

Speaker 3 (33:19):
No, but that was like a weird day because you're
at the forum, so you just have to kind of
eat what's there. Yeah, And so I didn't really have
a meal, and it's eleven o'clock we do Olivia Rodrigo.

Speaker 2 (33:29):
I'm leaving.

Speaker 3 (33:30):
It's like eleven thirty, and I was like starving, So
I wanted to go to In and Out, but then
I really just wanted to get to bed, and I
was I went straight to bed, and I regreted not
going in and out.

Speaker 1 (33:40):
You have to end a night like that with a
delicious meal. I no, no, but for myself, I had a
lot of fun to do it.

Speaker 2 (33:48):
When you're like with someone, it.

Speaker 1 (33:50):
Is, you know, fun. But it's great alone too, is it?

Speaker 7 (33:53):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (33:53):
Have you ever in I've never in and outed it alone.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
You're missing out.

Speaker 4 (33:59):
I have done it a lot.

Speaker 2 (34:01):
I've never never in and it alone.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
Wow, you should do that. Take yourself on a little
in and out date.

Speaker 6 (34:06):
Yeah, Okay.

Speaker 1 (34:23):
All I'm gonna say is I watch the most disturbingly
crazy cult documentary that I've ever watched. And I can't
talk about it because if I describe what it is,
You're gonna stare at me like you always do when
I describe something that you don't watch, and it's like
crazy insane. But I need someone to message me and

(34:45):
talk about this documentary which is on HBO Max and
it's called Love has Won the Cult of Mother God.

Speaker 2 (34:53):
Why would you ever watch that?

Speaker 1 (34:56):
Because someone was saying, oh, Taylor Banks was telling me
like this, have you I love a good like kind
of like crime documentary, love a good cold documentary. Nothing.
I don't know that anything will ever top this wow insanity,
but just be prepared. It is graphic. So yeah, I
just that's been on my brain and I need a

(35:18):
palate cleanse ace.

Speaker 2 (35:20):
You know, it's a great palate cleanses. Survivor.

Speaker 3 (35:22):
Oh yeah, well Survivor. I just finished season forty, which
was like the Winners at War, best season I've ever
watched a Survivor because they brought back it was all
the winners. So it was like twenty seventeen or twenty
winners from past seasons.

Speaker 1 (35:37):
Did you know all of them?

Speaker 3 (35:38):
No, because I haven't watched one through seventeen and I
knew most of them. Yeah, yeah, so good. And then
what was crazy is I'm watching the whole season. I'm
so into it. And then the finale they used to
do their finales live from LA but it was COVID
and so it was on Zoom and I was watching it. Actually,
we watched it last night. We finished it, and I
was like, that sucked because it was such a great,

(36:02):
powerful season. And then we just got the Zoom ending
and they're all on Zoom and their homes and I was.

Speaker 2 (36:08):
Like, damn.

Speaker 1 (36:10):
Yeah. The pandemic sucked for many reasons, including the Survivor finale.

Speaker 3 (36:15):
The no I know, but like I guess, I think
we were so used to just like watching stuff like
we were like, I'd rather get it on zoom and
like have them do it.

Speaker 1 (36:23):
We were just they were doing stuff right right.

Speaker 3 (36:25):
But now looking back and watching it, I was like, oh,
I wish I could have asked Mo, like, you know,
like ask more questions, Yeah, to my TV that and
then Jeff Probes would know and ask the contestants.

Speaker 1 (36:37):
Yeah, we did catch up on the Squid Games.

Speaker 2 (36:42):
Have you watched the Battleship episode yet?

Speaker 1 (36:44):
Yeah, we've a We're literally as caught up as you
can be.

Speaker 2 (36:47):
Oh my, the Battleship episode was iconic.

Speaker 1 (36:51):
It's so luck based in a show like I think this, Haley,
I think you'd be really good at this, and I'm like,
I don't think so, because it's you don't even have
to have skill. You just have to be maybe to
an extent, but a lot of it.

Speaker 3 (37:06):
Now Because if you were skilled, if you were really
good at Battleship, you'd say I want to be the
captain because I'm gonna win this for my team.

Speaker 2 (37:13):
That's skill. That's not luck.

Speaker 1 (37:16):
No, if your battleship is just getting lucky with.

Speaker 2 (37:19):
Your guests, no, it's not. There's skill in Battleship.

Speaker 1 (37:23):
Guessing where the other boats are? Isn't luck?

Speaker 4 (37:26):
No, what can you describe the skill?

Speaker 3 (37:29):
So I don't have it, so I can't describe it,
but there is a skill to it, like people who
play battleship often are gonna be better at battleship.

Speaker 2 (37:38):
Then let's say me playing Battleship's patterns.

Speaker 4 (37:40):
I guess you could probably patterns like.

Speaker 3 (37:42):
C four is like a common like missile thrower. People
always want to throw at C four. There's some skill.
I'm sure if you look on Reddit, I'm sure you'll
find something.

Speaker 4 (37:52):
Okay, slash Battleship.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
Okay, you know, not worth the argument, But a lot
of the other stuff is.

Speaker 2 (38:00):
Luck Like which one the one?

Speaker 1 (38:04):
Where did you finish it?

Speaker 7 (38:07):
No?

Speaker 2 (38:07):
I just finished the Battleship episode.

Speaker 1 (38:09):
Oh you're so far behind? Oh?

Speaker 2 (38:10):
Really, the best show you've ever watched?

Speaker 1 (38:12):
And you're are you watching Survivor finale instead of because.

Speaker 2 (38:16):
I'm watching Winners at War? Are you kidding me? Top
tier television?

Speaker 1 (38:21):
I'm trying to think if we watched anything else?

Speaker 7 (38:24):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (38:25):
Oh Special Forces? Did you finish that?

Speaker 2 (38:27):
Not finish yet?

Speaker 3 (38:28):
But what I don't have that many hours in a
day to watch TV.

Speaker 1 (38:32):
You watch like fourteen seasons of Survivor.

Speaker 2 (38:36):
I watched I.

Speaker 3 (38:38):
Watched two episodes of television a night usually, so it
depends when we have the kids, we watch something that
I watch with the kids. So, like, you're not gonna
watch Lego Masters, No I'm not. It's actually not bad TV.
I kind of quite like Lego Masters. But that's where
I watch all my baking shows. And then I'll watch
like one episode of something that I want to watch
before I fall asleep. Uh huh, not that much time.

Speaker 1 (39:01):
Well maybe for the sake of like having discussions about things,
you can watch one episode.

Speaker 2 (39:08):
If you told me ahead of time, I would do.

Speaker 1 (39:11):
I assume I got caught up because you said it
was the greatest show you've ever watched, and you can't
get over how amazing it is.

Speaker 2 (39:17):
I know, I love it. I'm still watching it.

Speaker 1 (39:19):
You're just giving it like a weekly you're treating it
like a weekly episode TV show.

Speaker 3 (39:23):
I can't we watch it with the kids, so I
can only watch it when we have them. So we
watch it when we have them, and when we don't
have them, I can't watch it.

Speaker 1 (39:30):
Oh, you're watching squid games with the children?

Speaker 7 (39:32):
Correct?

Speaker 1 (39:32):
Gotcha? All right, Well, I'll be more intentional about saying, Hey,
I'm caught up to this point on this show that
you're watching. Are you gonna be able to catch up
on it this weekend so we can talk about on
the podcast.

Speaker 3 (39:46):
Yeah, a little proactive would be Okay, appreciate it.

Speaker 1 (39:50):
I rushed through it thinking that you were being caught up.
And now we wait till like December ninth for the finale.
Well yeah, four days, yeah, four days, all right, because
then next week, if you watch it, if you get
all caught up, we can talk about the finale. Okay, Okay,

(40:11):
We're gonna take a break and we have some emails.

(40:35):
All right, we are back. Easton is going to fill
in for reading the emails today.

Speaker 4 (40:42):
Thank you. It's my pleasure to do this because I
can read. This is from Ali. Hello friends, Becca, Tanya, Mark,
and Easton smiley face. I would love your objective opinion
on what to do. Four years ago, I met my
husband while we were both living in Colorado. He is
originally from Nebraska, so after dating a while, we moved
to Lincoln. Fast forward to now. His dad is awful.

(41:02):
He is so rude. He has made it known that
he does not like me very much. For no reason.
He is mean to his wife, my mother in law,
and just makes everyone's life hell. We've gone family therapy
to try to fix it, but he's just older and
he's set in his ways. Here's my dilemma. I feel alone.
My husband does not have many friends here in town,
and it's hard. We're going on year three of trying
for a baby and dealing with the many struggles of infertility.

(41:25):
I missed my sisters and family back in Colorado, and
part of me wants to move back. My husband is
open to it and willing to move back, but it
can't shake the feeling of guilt. He loves Nebraska, he
is Nebraska. It's his happy place here, and a part
of me would always feel selfish for taking him away
from it. I just feel like with his parents getting
older and he does not have any friends or siblings here.
Once we finally get our miracle baby, we won't have

(41:46):
any help or community and it feels so isolating. So
my question is how do I look past the guilt
of it? Do we move? Do we say help? Love
you all? I'm a day win scrubber.

Speaker 1 (41:57):
It doesn't feel like he's particular cularly happy there either.

Speaker 2 (42:03):
Well, she says that he is Nebraska, so no, I
think he.

Speaker 1 (42:06):
Loves being home, but I don't feel like he's like
integrated into like a friend group or like super close
with like connecting with his family. And if he's willing
to move to Colorado, I think maybe he's trying to say, like,
I love where I'm from, and I'm also willing to
go where you're going to be happy.

Speaker 4 (42:24):
I'm sure there's Cornfield's in Colorado they can find.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
Yeah, But I feel like we're missing a part in
the email where we don't know what his thoughts are,
like how she brought it up to him yet, or
is this just stuff that she's like going through in
her head before she talks to him, Like she's like,
I feel bad asking him to do that. I feel
like you have to just be open and honest and
ask him his opinion and then he might say no,
I don't want to do it, and then you can

(42:49):
kind of come figure out a solution or a compromise.
But I feel like you got to just ask yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:56):
And I also think like it feels with his dad
and the family dynamic being stressful, Like y'all don't feel
like you're in a good routine. And I think that
you met in Colorado, so he obviously has he likes
Colorado because he moved there, and then you moved for
him to where he loves to be. And now it's

(43:18):
kind of like, do we go and create our new
you know, life somewhere that we're both happy and like
can meet people and community and have you know, go
visit Nebraska when when we can, but not feel stuck there.

Speaker 4 (43:34):
It seems to me like this is like if she
just says, let's move to Colorado, he would be he
would say sure, Like it seems like she's over Yeah,
like she's she feels guilty about it. But I mean
it's not like he said I'm not leaving Nebraska like that. Yeah,

(43:55):
I know, as I was doing an xcent and I
felt bad immediately, but I'm sorry everyone in Nebraska. I
love Cornesker State. Yeah, I mean, it's not like you
put his foot down. And also, when you have a kid,
you're gonna want to be in your family that will
help you out.

Speaker 3 (44:09):
I know, But I feel like, not this, she's not
really liking her father in law.

Speaker 4 (44:14):
That's what I'm saying. Like the because she's from Colorado, right,
oh yeah, yea, So they go back to Colorado. I
assume there's gonna be more of a network there. Yeah,
to care for this child instead of this terrible father
in law. You got just move. I bring it up
to him. He's probably gonna be down for it.

Speaker 3 (44:30):
And you know what always works as a pros and
cons list? Yes, pros and cons lists.

Speaker 2 (44:34):
Are top tier.

Speaker 4 (44:38):
List.

Speaker 3 (44:39):
Yeah, like I know, a persuasion, Oh yeah, tactics. I feel
like a pros and cons list could do you some
real good and you make the pros list really really long.

Speaker 1 (44:49):
But it sounds like he's open and wants you to
be happy. So I think it's worth like trying to
start your life in a place where both of you
can set roots in. He's willing to do that for you,
and I think that it feels time to make that
decision and start fresh.

Speaker 3 (45:10):
And do it then in the next couple of weeks,
because twenty twenty four is about to be here.

Speaker 1 (45:16):
Yeah, we don't feel rushed, you know, yeah, sure, sure, sure,
fresh start, fresh start, but good luck.

Speaker 2 (45:21):
We love you, we love you.

Speaker 4 (45:24):
Uh one more. Yeah, let's uh here's anonymous. Uh. I'm
writing and seeking advice my fiance and I have been
engaged almost a year and together for four years. Getting
married getting married to day bro woo hoo. I was
excited about that woo hoo part. I am so ready,
But there is one thing I've been struggling with. He
is very into sports, mostly football. We go to all

(45:46):
our college football games together, which is so fun. However,
he is almost two into it. He spends ninety nine
percent of the day, mostly Friday through Monday, on his
phone looking at sports betting and quote unquote making his
picks for the week. To give you an idea, his
screen time was ten hours one day and he has
a full time job. I am all for having hobbies,
but it's really become an issue because I feel like

(46:07):
we never talk. He's pretty quiet at baseline, and he
hasn't made an effort to be intimate or plan any
fun date nights. I can't even remember the last time
we went on a date. He's, without a doubt, the
guy for me, and this is just a little hump
we need to get over. But I'm unsure how to
approach the situation. I brought it up a couple months
ago and he said he'd be better about being attentive
and intentional all their time, but nothing has changed. He

(46:27):
really is a good guy and a hard worker. He
has a great career, and he treats me well besides
not prioritizing quality time. But I feel like he has
definitely been more attentive in the past and now it
feels like we're just living together as pals. And I
really think it's from sports.

Speaker 1 (46:41):
Yeah, so so drive me crazy.

Speaker 3 (46:43):
I mean I kind of experienced it, not on that level,
but like I get what she's saying, because but there
has to be a compromise.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
The way that she's explaining it, that would make me.

Speaker 3 (46:56):
So frantic and so unsettled, because like last night was
Monday Night football, but we were we wanted to finish
off this season of Survivor, so probably didn't watch.

Speaker 2 (47:07):
He was watching it on his phone.

Speaker 3 (47:09):
Whatever, she says, picking his bets or picking his picks
or checking up on his squad or whatever they do.

Speaker 2 (47:14):
And it is very annoying because he's like on his phone.

Speaker 3 (47:17):
So it's like I get it, but I'm like, he's
making the compromise because we're watching Survivor, so he's still like,
you know, playing with his team on his phone. Yeah,
And Sundays are kind of the same. He's like very
locked into football on Sundays. But if it was Friday
through Monday, that's like Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

Speaker 2 (47:32):
That's four days out of the week.

Speaker 3 (47:35):
Being locked into your phone and like not being attentive,
and that is a lot. And so I feel like
you need to say something. And even if it's okay,
maybe he still wants to have his Friday to Monday.
Maybe you can do some compromises and maybe you could
do a date night on like a Wednesday, so you
still feel like you're getting that quality time.

Speaker 1 (47:54):
I just don't think Friday through Monday needs to be
fully attend attention to one thing. That feels like excessive
no matter what. I don't care how much I am
all about hobbies and having passions and football is on
the weekends, but it's like set a time of like
how long you're going to be on your phone looking
at that stuff and if you want to watch one

(48:16):
of the games. But that's so unfair to your partner
to put them in that position.

Speaker 4 (48:21):
There's a big red flag coming out to me about this.
And I don't think this is a sports issue. I
think this is a gambling problem, because she says he
spends all most ninety percent of the day on the
weekends looking at sports betting and making his picks for
the week. So that means because at first I thought like, oh,
he's just in front of the TV the whole time.

(48:42):
But I think this man is I don't say addicted
to gambling, but I think gambling is a big component yes, betting,
and that leads to a lot of other problems that
will not go away and only get worse.

Speaker 3 (48:55):
Okay, So then that's like a trickier thing because how
do you It's like, how do you tell someone they
have a problem. You can't tell someone they have to
have a problem. They have to figure it out themselves.

Speaker 4 (49:03):
Yeah, and he probably sees he's like, this is.

Speaker 2 (49:06):
What I like, is what I like to do, right,
he calls it a hobby.

Speaker 4 (49:09):
Yeah, and hey, hey, hey babe, I'm getting money from
this and I'm getting rich here.

Speaker 2 (49:12):
But honestly, I would seek a professional.

Speaker 1 (49:16):
Yeah, maybe a couple therapy.

Speaker 3 (49:18):
Yeah, or if you want to do a couple sapy,
maybe like you go to like a professional that can
help you pro talk to him in like a way
that's gonna help him versus. I feel like if you
went to him and you were like, you have a
gambling problem, He's gonna shut it down, you know what
I mean, Like, you can't just do that. There's probably
a more methodical way that you can go about doing it.

Speaker 7 (49:37):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (49:38):
I don't want to freak you out, Anonymous, but you
say it's your fiance. As you get closer that wedding day,
there's gonna be I'm sure there's gonna be some financial
problems that will come to light. I'm just gonna say, yeah,
right now, you probably don't know about them, but I'm
not saying the exist. But a guy who spends the
whole weekend looking at sports betting.

Speaker 1 (49:55):
And also, like you don't feel chosen, You don't feel
like he puts He puts all his effort and energy
into football, like you deserve to for someone to look
after you and your needs, and this feels very selfish
on his part. So I think you just need to
approach him, and maybe you do need a professional that

(50:15):
can help you do it in a way that's productive
and not like just riddled with anger and make him
defensive but accusatory. But good luck, that's very, very challenging
I'm sorry. I feel like this last one's funny because
it won't take many a long time.

Speaker 4 (50:34):
Let's do it. This from Chloe sos re listening to
one of the episodes from twenty twenty one with Chelsea
Handler Good Vibes only as the title, and in the
thirty ninth minute we Love a Timestamp, Tanya says she'd
rather buy a house than thinking about the money would
take to throw a wedding. I truly can't believe my
ears right now. Listen how excited she is in real
time as an engaged girl. Mind blown emoji. Just had

(50:56):
to bring this to someone's attention. Love the pod.

Speaker 3 (50:59):
Wow, that is the whole problem. That's why I haven't
started planning my wedding because it's like you see, as
you get older, you look at how much everything is,
and I'm like, I don't want to spend this on
a wedding. I'd rather buy put a down payment on
a house. So it's like very debilitating because like you're
it's kind of like you're in that space. I can't

(51:20):
make it. That's why I just can't make a decision.
But then you get into like your bridal era and
you're like so excited about all that stuff. So I'm
like so excited about it and I want to do it,
but then I get debilitated because I'm like, but I
don't want to spend I mean.

Speaker 2 (51:35):
It's it's so crazy, it's so crazy. And so.

Speaker 1 (51:41):
You still have the same mindset, but you also are
just like, now that it's happening, you can't imagine not
having a wedding.

Speaker 2 (51:47):
I can't imagine not having a wedding, for sure.

Speaker 3 (51:50):
I definitely want to do it, but like the way
that I want to do it, I feel like I
can't what I mean, it's so expensive. I'd rather save
that and buy a house.

Speaker 1 (51:58):
Oh oh, well, could you do like a cute little
courthouse thing.

Speaker 2 (52:03):
I don't want to do that.

Speaker 1 (52:04):
Oh.

Speaker 3 (52:05):
So, like when you think about the when I think
about the wedding of my dreams.

Speaker 1 (52:11):
You'd like regret not having a wedding.

Speaker 2 (52:13):
I'd regret not doing anything correct.

Speaker 1 (52:15):
Living in your mansion but correct.

Speaker 2 (52:18):
Yeah. Yeah, well you bought a.

Speaker 1 (52:20):
House and then eventually you did a ceremony.

Speaker 2 (52:23):
Like have a wedding in like ten years, No.

Speaker 1 (52:26):
Not ten years, ye, like yeah, like a couple of years.

Speaker 3 (52:32):
Yeah, I feel like the further and further along you go, Like,
I have friends who got married. They did like a quick,
quickie wedding because they got pregnant and they were going
to like have a wedding after the baby came, and
now they're just like, eh, yeah, I feel like you
just get more and more less motivated. Yeah, correct, Right, Well,

(52:53):
so that girl is still there who talked to Chelsea Hammler,
which is why I feel like I'm in a predicament.

Speaker 1 (52:58):
That I'm in a predicament because she won the house
and she wants a wedding.

Speaker 3 (53:01):
Yeah, and I have not said millionaires. So it really
puts you in a pickle.

Speaker 1 (53:08):
A pickle of sorts. But I think if even if
you have the wedding, which is what you desire and want,
I think the time will come when you feel ready
to buy house. It all lines, you know.

Speaker 3 (53:20):
Yeah, So yep, just trying to keep you know, just
work a little harder.

Speaker 1 (53:25):
Yeah, just.

Speaker 2 (53:28):
A little harder, next two to three years.

Speaker 1 (53:32):
All right, Well, we'll be back next week. And I
think there's two episodes next week. Yeah, yes, yeah, there.

Speaker 4 (53:39):
Are two episodes next week. Where are they going to be?

Speaker 1 (53:41):
Only time will tell, Only time will tell, and only
we know and.

Speaker 2 (53:45):
Sneak peaks here.

Speaker 1 (53:47):
Greeks, it's our final book Club episode. Just kidding. We
love you so much and hope you have a wonderful
week and we'll be back next week.

Speaker 2 (53:59):
I love you, love you, Bye.

Speaker 7 (54:10):
Hm.