Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya Red and I
Heart Radio podcast. Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in. It's Monday, Monday, Monday,
Monday Funday. It's the best Monday ever because there's so
much talk about period. Period that was just like, how
(00:24):
many people message you and thought that that weird block
of silence last week? They were like, I thought my
phone died. I thought it froze. I will say, the
living took off, really took off, started a movement, started
a movement, and you know I took that movement into
my weekend and I really was living okay. But you know,
(00:45):
it was kind of held against you when you want
to do the TikTok with me because the amount of
people that were like, Tanya is not living, let me,
living with an EID does not equal tiktoking. Oh but
I will say, I actually do want to do it
with you, because I'm living. Us is about supporting your
(01:06):
friends and going along with the fun ideas other people have.
You know what upset me the most about that whole
thing wasn't even that she wanted to do the TikTok
to me. The tone was upsetting, but also what was
upsetting is that afterwards? Because I was like, oh my gosh,
people are upset with you, like they're really disappointed you're
not doing this with me, but you always dance with
(01:27):
Brad like all this stuff. And then she was like,
oh my gosh, I don't like how all the Becca's
side with you and then all the Tania side with me.
And I was like, I don't know. I think a
lot of these people actually are Tanya's and they're upset
they're feeling her by you. I got a couple of
d ms from some Becca's and they were on my
side with it, so you know, so that's they're saying.
(01:50):
It wasn't all you tried to separate, you try to
start because I realized in your d MS you get
the backup of like yeah yeah yeah, and then my
d MS I get the backup of like yeah yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah yeah. But the two do not cross yeah yeah
yeah no, they didn't not in that situation, and I
do want to do that TikTok with you. Interesting is
that because you saw Joe Jonas do it? No, but yes,
(02:13):
kind of I realize how much easier it is than
I thought, Like I think I can learn it pretty quickly,
and I've been learning it for you. TikTok, I've been
learning it for you. Are not meant to be hard
because like they're supposed to be something that everyone can
participate in, So it's not just like professional dancers can
do it. Some people look better doing it, some people
look a little more crisp when they do it. But
(02:37):
learning it, thank you. I can't wait to see it,
see it in action. Yeah, so we're gonna do it
together at some point. Great, I can't wait. I still
net to practice AWE. But I do want to support
the song because I love the song. The song is
so fun. I say, balencia is as if it's a
real word. So good. So you took notes? What okay?
So on my path to live this weekend, and um,
(03:01):
I have a lot to talk about. First of all,
I want to talk about because this isn't much of
a topic. But we I didn't escape room on Friday night.
I haven't done one of those. And there was like
these red stars that were like on the stuff in
the room and they like explained to you kind of
the room before you go in, and he was like,
you guys are gonna see red stars everywhere, and I
(03:22):
was like, you know, this is so significant. He was
with me and we were all like what does it mean?
And they were like, they mean absolutely nothing. Don't think
anything into it. I was like, oh, this feels dark,
not not the significance you're looking for. Correct. Correct. But
so my Friday night was like super fun. I got
really drunk, I broken nail, I was really hungover, and
(03:44):
so Saturday I enjoyed some pigs in a blanket. Mm hmmm.
And let me tell you, no, finder of a delicacy,
where have those been on my wow? I'm surprised to
hear you say this because you're so clean all the time,
but I am with you on those same They're underappreciated,
they don't They're not talked about enough, not talked about
(04:08):
at all. Like I've never I don't even know if
I've ever had a pig in a blanket. Surely at
least those. I think we polished off the plate at
this that this party that we were at because we
were both so hungover and I was just like dipping
those and ketchup and mustard was all I needed. And
(04:31):
let me tell you, if you have not had the
pigs in a blanket from David Busters. Those are it?
They have like this salty seasoning on the outside of
the bread, and that's what these felt like. They were
everything but the bagel seasoning around. I don't know, but
it was so good. And I went on a little
(04:51):
rant on my Instagram about it, and so many people
were like, wow, Becca would really appreciate this, and I
was like, sure enough, she has responded and she does.
Thank you for talking about this subject. It's not talked
about enough. And I it brought back a memory when
we were like The Bachelor, when they had roast ceremony nights.
They put out like catered food and you know, they'd
(05:12):
have like little snacks and stuff, and I would be
like hovering over the pigs in a blanket plate because
they would go so fast and if you didn't get
in quick, they were gone. They're always snatched up. I
never knew this is a whole new world. So I
want to figure out a way to make it my
new hobby. What does that mean or what does that
look like? I don't know, but like making them were
(05:34):
eating them as your hobby, Like no, just just discovering
the world of pigs in a blanket different like the variety,
like how they're made, you get them, you know, like
your own. Yeah, maybe make my own. I'm cooking a
lot this week, so you know, you can check out
my cooking. You're Tanya as a cooking show now. But
(06:00):
I'm really trying to kind of get back into my
routine of you know how I was very pre pandy.
I was very like buttoned up, and I'd always make
my food the night before. And I feel like I
got so off track that I'm trying to like real
it back in. I kind of like off tracked Tanya
a little bit, Like she's a little chaotic and there's
something like nice about it. But I understand, like for
your sanity, maybe you need to balance it out a
(06:22):
little bit on the weekends. But it's so funny. So
I'm eating the pigs in a blanket and I looked
down and I'm wearing this like white blazer and at
this birthday party with all of Robbie's family, and I
have just like mustard stains all over my white blazer
and it's like in my hair. And he was like,
you were chowing down, Like how embarrassing that I have
all this mustard all over me? And I was like,
did you all see the girl over at the pigs
(06:43):
in a Blanket station? She didn't breathe. Yeah, oh god,
it was so good though, so uh, I just really
wanted to share my admiration for that. Well, thank you.
I mean, like I said, I don't know if it's
talked about her appreciate it enough, delicious because nobody has
recommended those to me in my life. And maybe they're
not talked about because they're always the first thing gone,
(07:04):
so people don't get to try. They don't even get
a chance to try. Our next live show, we should
have pigs in a blanket Yeah, yeah, like people can
just snatch up a pigs and blanket on the way
and popcorn like in a little popcorn back. You guys
go out with a basket and throw them out to
the audience, like you do even better. I would be
kind of upset though, if I just got like pegged
(07:25):
in that blanket. Yeah, like oh grease stained. Oh ain't
a waste of a pig in a blanket? Yeah? Maybe
that we'll we'll figure out a way to do that.
We I hope we have a live show soon. That
would be great. Um. Oh next, she's going down her
notes page, I wanted to talk about the Ava Max
(07:47):
song because I feel like it's not getting enough love
and appreciation. And I swear, as Bob is my witness,
it's going to be the song of the summer. It
is so good. Can we get a taste of it
from you? How does it go? You should take a
little finger and just pointed in the mirror, baby, maybe
you're the problem. Okay? You you just like instead, you
(08:12):
should take a little finger and just pointed in the mirror, baby,
maybe you're the problem. Wow. Yeah, it's my favorite song
right now. It's so good. It's called maybe You're the
Problem by mm X. It's so good. It's so good.
So I just want to check back in at the
end of August and Okay, I'm sure we'll do that.
Mark put it in the calendar, Okay, checking back in.
(08:33):
If I know us, we'll be hitting that hit it
real hard at all summer and check back in. I
feel like, as it was already, is the song of summer.
You know, that could be your vote. That's fine. I
feel like that's the song is the Spring Like I'm
gonna associate that song with the spring, like the flowers
anywhere anytime soon. Well, I think his album is going
to come out, so I think it might turn into,
(08:56):
you know, some something different. You have a pitch for
a song of the summer. Yeah, I'm gonna go for
the Girls by Haley Kiyoko. Oh wow, this which also
feels like it has a little bias to it, which
also drops may. What's nineteen? Yeah, the Night of the nineteen. Um,
(09:16):
it's so fun. It goes some as for the girls
and girls are like girls and girls are like boys
and girls and girls. Yeah alright, alright, so we all
have our pitches and we'll check back in August and
we'll see East and I are on the same page
that was last on my notes. Aside from Mother's Day,
(09:37):
How was your mother? Did you have a great first
Mother's Day? Yeah, honestly it was. And I got our
sweet card from Sunny. She wrote it all out and
she thanked me for making her food and care of
her and that she's she really lucked out in the
dog mom world. Yeah, that's really sweet. She's a sweet girl.
(09:59):
She's this weetest girl, and she gave it to me
in her little mouth, And I know I was gonna say,
I'm so like, I know she's advanced, but the fact
that she's riding cards already is impressive. She had a
little up from her dad, but the sentiment was hers
I'm sitting at the nail salon last week and I
am just relaxing getting a pedicare manicure. I walked there,
(10:22):
so I was like, it was a long walk and
I was just like cooling off, enjoying, and I see
Tanya and Sonny come in, and I'm like, I'm not
gonna say anything because it was really crowded, okay, and
I don't like drawing attention to myself in those situations
in general. And so Tanya looks, makes eye contact and
she goes, oh, and it just becomes like I think
(10:44):
everyone in there heard our whole conversation. Sonny was like
going crazy. It was absolute chaos and my kind of
dream country. I was like, oh my god. Everyone turns looks,
and I'm like, oh, this is this is I was like,
do you want to hold sun in, like throwing her
in her lap a massage, and She's like, I like,
(11:05):
don't have hands, mocking my nails done. Sonny's in my lap,
liking my face. It was It was fun but you
know what's so funny what I got a lot of
d m s about that nail salon encounter, and I
was like, they were saying, um, if I parted, and
I was like, no, I held it together. But funny enough,
Sonny farted. Remember I was smelling her button. I was like,
(11:27):
what are the odds of my dog first in a
nail salon. Okay, this is weird to me because Tonya
literally puts her nose like right next to her butt
and takes a deep whiff and she's like, oh, I
think she farted. I'm like, why go what was I
want to make sure it was hers. I smelled something
and I was like, I thought it was you. First
of all, I don't fart in nail salon. M O. Okay,
(11:50):
that is all you. That's what you're known for. You
left a legacy in Brentwood and put it on my
Instagram bio. They have your photo of your one did
there's a warrant um, But yeah, it was a good time.
It was fun surprise to see you in there. It
was a great surprise. Um, I'm trying to think Mother's Day. No,
(12:13):
she didn't. Phoebe and I have Phoebe has been going
through some things, like with her health. I'm trying to
figure out she has this really crazy cough and she
they said she has a collapsing trachea, which is very
common in Pomeranians. But I just can't seem to get
under control. And I love her so much, and like,
(12:34):
I'm devastated because I know it's like uncomfortable for her
because it's like her whole little body doing it. But
it happens between the hours of two am and about
five AM, and I have not slept through the night
since I don't even know when because she does it
almost every single night. I give her cough medicine. I'm
I'm giving her medicine. And I've spent so much money
(12:56):
taking her to these different bets and I'm like, if
I get an answer, I'm happy to spend the money.
But I don't know. I'm I'm the next move. I
guess is trying a cardiologist, but they don't have any
availability till June. I know it's really stressful, So I've
been really stressed out with Phoebe. So it's okay that
she didn't give me a car. She's not feeling well
(13:18):
to say she's off the hook this year the hook, yeah,
or Phoebe. I'm I know, it's really sad, and I'm like,
I'm just trying to I just want her to be
comfortable and I want her to live forever, So don't
even I'm already bracing myself for Sunny spay appointment that day.
Everybody have eyes on me on my seventeenth because I'm
(13:40):
going to be a wreck that day. Next week, next week, yeah, yeah,
my little girl is not is not becoming a woman
and woman is being taken. I am going to be
a total I already told Red Star I was like,
just chicken on me every once in a while because
(14:03):
I'm not going to be good that day. Yeah, she's
gonna be great, I know, but it's a whole like
twelve hours I leave her. Yeah, just no photos being
sent to me. You probably wouldn't want photos of her
in that position, no text updates how she's doing, Just
gone for twelve hours. Yeah, she's gonna be great. Yeah,
and then maybe she'll stop pumping. Y'all have no I
(14:25):
have never seen a female dog hump like Sunny, So
I'm like she is her mother's dog that's also an
upsetting text that I get on the regular with the
video of Sunny humping is tell me she isn't just
like her mother. I'm like, okay, so she inherited your
gassiness at nails. Yes, and she had inherited red Stars,
(14:50):
chicken allergy, and metabolism. They poop on the same schedule. Super,
that's great. No, we're putting that out there. It's okay, um, okay,
so too much? I don't know, It's never too much
with you. Taylor, Solets released her version of This Love
(15:25):
Taylor's version, and for some reason, I don't I need
to listen to them, like side by side. It is
so good. No, they're not. There's something different. No, there,
I promise you. They're not identical. There is something different.
And maybe it's the association with this new movie. It's
like in the trailer and that amplified it. But that
(15:48):
song takes me back to you, I know. I was like,
the song honestly is quite triggering for me because it was.
I listened to it on repeat while we were broken up,
and it was like, this love is good, this love
is bad, this love is alive, back from the dead.
These hands had to let it go. Free and this
(16:12):
love came back to me. Uh wow, that was It
took me out of the podcast mode. Um. It reminds me.
It's so funny because I think of you dancing in
my living room in my old apartment to that song.
And then I also remember when I heard it that
I think I've talked about this before, but um, on
(16:34):
Christ this season, that's all we had was Taylor Slips
nine album. I had in like a seedy disc player
because that's all I was allowed to have. And after
the Fantasy Suites, when I was just like waiting in
my room for the roast ceremony, that was the song
that I kept playing. It was like so dramatic. I
be like, if it's meant to be, it's come back
(16:56):
to me. Yeah. But do you think the rerelease of
nine nine is coming soon? What are your theories on that?
I do? I mean, it's like what else would it
be speaking out? Okay, but she's already released this one
and Wildest Dreams Now wild the Dreams came out her
(17:17):
room that I feel like, if she's gonna do an album,
she's gonna do the album. She's not gonna piecemeal it
and do just a song. And a year later a
different song from that album. If she's only two songs
from the album, I feel like we're there. Yeah, I
think we're there. I'm excited. Man, those songs, the balt
songs are going. That's gonna be insanty. What does that mean?
(17:43):
Like insane? Oh yeah, in sonity? Yeah, Like, how do
they get better than what we got? Or actually no,
they're probably worse because they didn't make the album. I
don't know, though. I think it's like our us have
to choose a certain amount, and maybe they were, like
she was, just like it was a toss up between
(18:05):
maybe they didn't fit into the story she's trying to tell.
But now the story is okay to tell. She can
do anything because really we didn't get very many Harry
style songs aside from style, so maybe there's gonna be
some more Harry songs. Mm hmm about him? You mean, yes,
I would like a feature with Harry and I don't
(18:25):
think that's in the car. Well, if you watch TikTok,
I mean she would never do this, but if she
released rerelease on the day Harry's House comes out, she
wouldn't do that. They don't have a bout blood do
they No, But she's not a petty like that with
people that she likes. I think they're good because they
had a moment at that was that the Grammys, but
(18:49):
this was like Scooter or something. It's so funny how
we cares so much about like celebrity relationships. I was
thinking this the other day because Chrischell uh announced her
relationship with g Flip on the Selling Sudset reunion and
g Flip is a non binary Australian artist, and everyone
(19:11):
like freaked out and they were like Chris Shell's having
a midlife crisis. And I'm like, these people don't even
know this person, Like they don't even know Chrischelle and
they're just like having all these opinions and thoughts about
her dating life and like diagnosing her being like she's
not well. And I'm like, as someone who knows her,
it's so frustrating because I'm like, she's so happy. I
(19:32):
feel like she's happy, she's living her life. Okay, So
I actually got the download on that because I've never
watched an episode of Selling Sunset and I actually don't
think I like it because they don't just fight with
each other. No, I think it's just I think it's
just like any other real It's like Love Island but
real estate. Tommy, Okay, I'm sorry, you cannot compare Love
Island because they don't choose each other. They treat each
(19:53):
other with respect and and it's actually really quite amazing.
Side note, Molly May and Tommy on Love Island are
visiting Los Angeles. They're all like this Los Angeles. And
I've been wanting Molly me on the podcast forever and
I'm just like, how have I not bumped into her?
But anyways, um, so I never watched the show, but
I got a little background on why people were so
(20:15):
uh taken aback by the news, and that's because a
big thing that she has talked about mark just yonder
really big. So there is I'm sorry, it's Monday. I'm
not really invested in Critchelle, but go ahead. But they, um,
she has been really voke about wanting to have a baby,
like wanting to have a baby, and like she keeps
(20:35):
breaking up with these people because they don't want to
have a baby. So then they're like, oh, now it's
gonna be even harder for you to have a baby.
But she could still have a baby. Yeah, but that's
I guess what the controversy was. I know, but I
think like we're way past that way of thinking of
being like, oh, you can't have a baby if, like
I don't know, I think it's just and even if
(20:56):
maybe it was like that's what she thought she wanted
with Jason, and then when they were woke up, she
was like, that's not a priority right now. And the
other guy she needed too, that's why they broke up, allegedly,
the or the guy from day to at this don't
know the guy she was married to. Oh, Justice, I
don't know. But my whole point is that I just
find it so fascinating how invested we get into people's
(21:17):
lives and people like make assumptions without even know, like
literally no one knows her that's making these claims against her.
And I really appreciated she posted something and she was like,
you know, um, I understand like some of y'all are confused,
but I'm not. And I really liked that because it's
like I get it. Maybe you don't understand it, or
(21:39):
maybe it wasn't what you expected, but it's I'm not
confused about it, you know, And it's my life so
it was just kind of an eye opener, and we
do it with like I'm so fascinated by other celebrities
to let me tell you, I am so invested in
the Jonas brothers lives, Like it's not even funny. I'm
really invested in them, Like I genuinely feel like you're
(22:00):
kind of my friends, kind of friends with them, so
that kind of and not really, I'm invested in people
like people. I know. I don't feel weird being invested
in their love life, but like it's like strangers that
if someone started, like Jennifer Aniston is dating so and so,
I'd be like like all about it, you know, but
why does it matter. I'm not her friend, I don't
(22:23):
have any association. I want to be her friends so badly.
But you know, actually I saw I went to this
John Legend listening thing last week and I met John
Legend and everybody, all the scrubbers were messaging. I mean,
they're like, did you ask him to get Christie on
the podcast? And I was like, no, no, because we're
there to hear his music. And I didn't want to
use it as like a in to get her because
(22:45):
I feel like we could get her on our own,
you know, like I didn't need to interrupt his love
and about the music. You know, it's about more about
the music, yeah, instead of it was scrubbing in. Yeah, okay,
they been inappropriate. Next time you see him, because you'll
be like John Antonia, I remember, like totally remember you. Yeah,
(23:06):
and he'll be like, oh yeah she was. She did.
She was just like appreciating the music. But now it's
time to go in with the big, big ask Yeah,
the big ask um. Okay, we're gonna take a break
and then we'll be right back. I wanted to talk
about part of the Matt Gala, was Kim Kardashian fitting
into the dress. I don't know if you've had this
conversation on the morning show, but I wanted to talk
(23:26):
about on the podcast. So we'll be right back with that. Okay,
we're back. So there was this, uh, during one of
(23:47):
the interviews at the Matt Gala, Kim kardashi and they
were asking about her dress and she was saying it
was Marilyn Monrose, and she said she lost sixteen pounds
in three weeks and she basically were like a sweatsuit,
ran on the treadmill and she basically eat carbs or sugar.
And it was a big controversy because obviously the Kardashians
are there, Uh, there are women that young girls and
(24:12):
people are watching and like copying and modeling after their lives.
Um and Lily Reinhardt came out and she didn't address
Kim Kardashian by name, but she was just like, can
we please stop giving these celebrities attention? You know, like
this is well, Like she was being praised for it,
and I think that's the thing that is unhealthy to
(24:36):
like be like, God, that's so cool she lost sixteen
pounds and three He's like, yeah, let's starve ourselves and
like running a sweatsuit. See. I guess I didn't see
a lot of the praise for it. I just saw
like what in the heck? Like that is crazy that
your body can do that? But I also is it
I think where I struggle sometimes with this is that
(24:58):
like do I think it's health see or do I
think it's like what is it something that I would do?
And no? But is it her fault that people praise
her for that? Like I guess I took it more
as like her just being honest about what the process
was to fit into this dress. That was like this
iconic moment, and she wasn't saying like this is what
(25:19):
everyone should do. She was just saying, like, this is
what I did to fit into the dress. Because a
lot of people were like, how did like Kim Kardashian's
body type fit into Like they have a very different shape.
Let me tell you what your girl would have done,
because I'm one day without sugar in my coffee and
it's rough. If I were him, I would have just
gone a little more of that fabric maybe from the
(25:39):
bottom of the dress and just stitched it run up
the middle. Well, I don't think there's allowed to do
anything for the dress, And I think that a lot
of people were like all that to fit into a dress,
like why not just wear something else? But she committed
to being in the dress, So I think, I I
it's hard because I see both sides of it, of
like not praising this lifestyle, of like you have to
(26:02):
look a certain way and lose this much weight in
this amount of time, But it's also like the unhealthy.
It's it's the it's the praise of the I think
what Lily is saying is it's the praise of the
unhealthyness of it all, the like losing sixteen pounds, and
then she went on the Red carpet was talking about
how she's gonna have this pizza and donuts party after
and like that, you know, like it's the the yo
yo and the I'm gonna starve myself and then I'm
(26:23):
gonna like, you know, binge eat after. And it's I
think that's what she's talking about for people that you know,
I have eating disorders or have had eaten disorders. It's
like triggering and and it's harmful to kind of spread
that that message of like starve yourself to fit into
a dress and then eat a bunch of pizza and
(26:44):
donuts after because you deserve it. You know. It's like, uh, yeah,
I guess, I don't know. Sometimes I I guess when
you have that big of a platform, you do have
to consider all of these things and who's watching you
and who's paying attention to and what you're saying. But
I just didn't think that it was Kim being like
(27:04):
everyone should do this to achieve. I just took it
more as like this is what I didn't To be honest,
I imagine so many other people did similar things to
fit into their met Gala outfits, like why there was
that extreme and she was just honest about it. So
I I understand both sides, Like I see the danger
in it, and I also I'm like, is that Kim
Kardashians like fault if she Yeah, no, I know, I
(27:29):
think it's But also it's like she does have such
a huge, huge platform, and I think people, you know,
I think that you can kind of be naive to
those things sometimes because you know, I've been talking a
lot about how I want to cut out sugar, and like,
you know, I talked about that and somebody actually wrote
me a really kind of meaningful message about how that's
harmful because sugar is not you know, there's not the
(27:50):
devil and stuff. But for me, it's causing personally, it's
I want to just get rid of my addiction, because
it's the addiction to it that I don't like, not
necessarily the fact that it's sugar in a sense, but
I'm just so addicted to it and I don't like that.
I'm not addicted to it um But I don't see
it from somebody else's perspective because I haven't lived that
(28:11):
their experience, you know what I mean. So it's like,
you know, just being cautious and and how you how
you say things and and express things because I think,
you know, eating disorders and uh, relationship with food for
unfortunately for women is a really really touchy, touchy subject,
you know, Like I think there's like a stat where
(28:33):
it's just like some crazy number of women aren't happy
with their bodies and have gone to like extremes to
you know, whether it's starving themselves or purging and you know,
things like that. So I don't know, I think it's
Lily's onto something because I think it's just spreading like
a I agree, I get what you're saying, like, don't
don't think that this is what you have to do
(28:55):
to feel good about yourself, Like you don't don't feel
like you have to follow this example of this. And
on the flip side, I don't know that Kim Kardashian
was doing anything other than stating like, yeah, I worked
my ass off to get into this dress, Like literally
worked my ass off to get into this dress because
I it was this iconic moment I wanted to have
at the Met Gala. So I don't know, I just
(29:18):
found It was like an interesting conversation because I was
reading Lily's oh the article about Lily, and I was like,
I totally get this, and I see this. You know,
I saw a lot of I saw a lot of
articles that were like talking really negatively about what Kim
was saying and stuff and how it's problematic now. And
so it was definitely, um, she knows how to get
(29:39):
people talking. That's one thing, how to get people. I
was more along, like looking at her, I'm saying, how
did her roots look so blond? Like how do I
get that going? I guarantee her scalp was burnt from that.
It looked like somebody took a cute tip and dipped
in and bleach and just went straight in there. But
you know what I'm gonna Tony this thing on. Not
(30:01):
it off our hairdresser, this is the podcast, But yeah,
you know what I'm looking for next time, get a
look cute tip in there going. I mean, there's just
a lot of it's a lot of talk about I mean,
even in our climate right now, with the potential possible
overturn of reverse wade, it's that conversation about our bodies
(30:23):
and our responsibility to them and I personally, I I
have so many people in my life who are genuinely
scared by this news and like the their rights being
taken away. And it's not official yet, it hasn't been overturned.
Am I speaking? Yeah? Um, But I think there's just
(30:45):
a huge I've seen so many beautiful points about this,
and I am able to see. Unfortunately, I see everything
from both sides. And I grew up very conservative, very Christian.
I was very my like there is. It was very
black and white. For me. It was very much like abortion.
(31:06):
You know. I did not agree with that. I did
not support it. And now I I've seen so many
things where it's saying I am not I don't love abortion,
but I I feel like everyone deserves the right to choose. Well,
that's the whole thing. Like, you know, for me, I
I could not get an abortion, but I don't think
(31:28):
it's for me to say what somebody else can or
can't do. That makes sense. So it's like for me,
that's what I choose for myself. But I don't think
anybody should tell somebody me or anybody else what to
do with my body. That's my choice, that's the thing.
And I think it's it's not so black and white,
like I've seen so many people who had a different
(31:48):
stance and then they had kids and their stance change
or they had something happened to them. And I don't
think it's for someone else to make that decision of
what what is right for that person, and not everyone
has the same religious reliefs around it, and I don't
think it's it's one group. And I also I hate
(32:09):
this about social media. Part of it is because on
both sides of the coin do this where they share
the most extreme version of a group of people, and
it will show someone who is saying like horrible things,
um hateful things, evil things, And I'm like, you could
pick people out from any group of people and show
(32:29):
that example and everyone would agree that that is not right.
But that is not the majority. The majority is saying
everyone deserves the chance to do what they want with
their body, how they want to do it. And that's
not saying that you love abortion. It's just saying, like
it is someone it is someone's personal choice to do
that too with their body what they want. And I
(32:52):
think that the conversations have gotten so um nasty and
hateful and it's just It's as simple as someone having
the right to choose, and you don't have to make
that decision. If you don't believe in it, that is
fully your decision. And um so I think it's just
I think it's a scary time, and I think the
fact that it's men. I am not someone who is
(33:15):
like all men are terrible, we hate men, I think
I'm not. I think there are wonderful men, are there.
I don't like that. I just don't like that mentality
of like that we they just think about women. They
just think about themselves. Some men do. And I'm saying
I don't want to group them all together, just like
(33:35):
I wouldn't want to be grouped together with everything I
believe with like the intense extremes, you know, Like I
don't want to be grouped with those people for what
I believe. But I just hate that something that is
so specific and personal to a woman is being controlled
and dictated by men who have never experienced any of
(33:56):
the things that women go through. It is just like
mind boggling, Unlike guys can just go around and like
they well, I read this whole threat and I wish
I had it saved. I'm sure I can find it, um,
but it was talking about how, um, there should be
a law where men that men have to get a
(34:18):
vasectomy or something too, because it's not just all on women,
like so much of the blame and the pressure and
everything gets put on women and it's not there's it
takes two to dango here and there's I think I
don't know who the conversation was with, and it may
have been between Kamala and um Brett Kavanaugh, but she
(34:40):
was saying, can you think of any law that uh
what does she say? Like any law that is required
of a man with his body? And he said something
along the lines of like not that I can think
of right now. And I was thinking, think of all
of the laws that we have not had, we have
not been able, we've not always been able to vote,
(35:02):
we've always been able to have a bank account, and
now it's this. So I think I think the anger
and frustration is surrounding that aspect of it, and it's
it's scary, and I think it's I mean, I don't know.
I I hope that it doesn't happen. I I you guys,
(35:22):
you mentioned men, and I wish these men in charge
didn't think about women so much, but honestly, they seem
obsessed with it. They obsessed with controlling women. It's an
attack on women. It's a war on women. They don't
want you women having that kind of controlled over your
body and who you have sex with and all that stuff.
They don't want that, and they're very scared of that.
I've been talking to my daughters a lot about this
(35:42):
over the past week, and they're pissed. And I'm proud
of them for being pissed because they should be, because
they should be able to make these choices for themselves. Now,
I know a lot of I know that you two
now are going to get heat from your Facebook group.
I know there's a lot of people in the scrubbing
world that don't agree with you on poor choice. I
just want to address them. I'm anti abortion. I would
never get one. I would never want my wife or
(36:03):
daughters to get one. But there are things we can
do for society that actually reduces the number of abortions.
It's sex education, it's access to contraception, it's free clinics,
women's health clinics, their availability and accessibility, those actually bring
the numbers down. Banning abortion in any state isn't going
to bring the numbers down, but it's going to kill women.
Women are going to die because of this in the thousands,
(36:26):
depending on how long it's on the books. And that's
bad and we should have a problem with that. And
if you really think this is these politicians are just
good hearted people who are just trying to save the babies,
you haven't looked into this enough. And if you really
think that it's a baby the second that man ejaculates,
you haven't looked into this enough. And if you think
that it's just about stopping abortion, you haven't looked into
(36:47):
this enough. Because they're not going to stop with that.
They want to get rid of contraception. They're already in
states talking about banning e u d s. They wanted
to get rid of same sex marriage, which some of
you are probably fine with, but they want to get
rid of into social marriage. I mean, everything is on
the table right now unless somebody does something, just stop
this before it officially goes into place. So anyway, that's
(37:08):
my rent. Now, that was a good point, And I
think there's a huge misconception that roverse weight is just
about abortion. It's not. It's about like all the care
and the prevention and the education surrounding sex education. And
I think I'm with you Mark. I am against abortion.
I don't believe in an abortion, but that is my decision.
(37:31):
And so let's do real things that stop the number
of unwanted pregnancies. You can do that because it's not
about abortion, it's not about babies. It's about control. Yeah,
it really is about control. And like these politicians are
not they're not good, they're not like thinking of the
doing good. They're just like I just can't yeah, um
(37:59):
so yeah, I mean I'm always prepared to get you know,
heat over these things. But I did think it was
something to be addressed and to talk about. And I,
um just I think it's a good conversation to have
and to be having with each other. And I think
there is a I've seen people do it in respectful way,
but people are mad and people are scared, and I
(38:21):
think when people are mad and they're scared, things escalate
and that's what happened. So but I also think too,
there's something that happened with like religion and politics where
it was like just because you're this, you have to
do this, and it's like again, yes, I am I
I I am against abortion. I would not get one myself,
(38:42):
but that's not for me to choose for anybody else,
you know what I mean, Like I would never It's
like me pushing my religion on somebody else. Like my
religion is that, that's my My relationship with God is
my own. Like I'm not. I'm not sitting here and
trying to you know, right, and now everyone has to
make you do it, like you know what I mean, Like,
(39:02):
I know, it gets really tricky, the merge of politics
and religion, and it's it's shouldn't be merged. The same
people saying hey, just adopt those the same people trying
to stop gay couple from adopting it. I know. That's
what's so frustrating. It's like, okay, so then everyone who
gets pregnant has to have the baby, and and yeah,
(39:25):
you can put it up for adoption. It's not saying
that you have to raise the baby, put it up
for adoption. And then a gay couple says, hey, we'd
love to adopt a baby and give a baby at home,
and they're like, but we can't your your same sex,
So that's not gonna work. It does not make any
sense to me, and it is infuriating. I've always had
that thought of like how difficult it is, How the
(39:49):
how the same people that want to force people to
have babies also will not let to loving people adopt
the baby because their love looks different. Yeah, don't get
me started on that. I just want to say, really quick,
if I've never had any competitive d M in my
(40:10):
entire life, but I'm extremely pro choice. If you have
something to say, it a vacantinia, send it my way instead,
give it to me. I'm gonna be like that that
soldier standing over the child in the bed. Send me
to angry d m s. I don't care. I'm an atheist.
I don't wink. God is real. Send those d ms
on my way. My instagram is at Eastern al and
I will take it. Send him to me. That's all
(40:32):
I have to say. Oh I got I mean, honestly,
it's like I can take it. Um, it's just mm hmm.
I think we should take a break. Yeah, let's take
a break. We'll be right back. All right, you guys,
(41:06):
we are back and we have some emails, so mark
take it away, all right back, Thank you very much.
This is from Rachel to get directed to the point.
I'm a virgin and there's a chance I will be
on my period on our wedding night slash honeymoon. I'm
just wondering what to do here. He's also a virgin.
I just want to know what you think. Do I
(41:27):
try not to worry about it, just go with it
in a normal way. Do I try a disk or
something similar? Will that make it weird? Considering it's my
first time, I'm curious what you girls would do, and
from a guy's perspective, what East and Mark can speak
to as well as an unbiased perspective. Well, it's the
wrong girl. Oh yeah, I bless you, thank you. I
(41:47):
feel like I could be speaking wrong on this. So
I don't know if there's anyone here who can help me.
But I think that you're guy. No can I don't.
I don't know if you're You're gonna try and tell
us a per period birth control bills? Yes, it was
like messing with your hormones. Okay, don't do don't listen
to me. I've never done. I've never been on birth control,
(42:08):
so I don't know what but I just have known.
People are like, yeah, I'm just gonna skip. Okay, don't
listen to me bad advice. I mean, it's just you
don't want to tinker with your hormones like that. In
my I've done it before, and I I wish I
could go turn the hands of time and not. Yeah,
but um, I love period sex, so I just embrace it,
(42:30):
girl the first time, so so it only gets better
from there. I say, embrace it, you know, like as
long as it's not your heavy flow day like game
on girl, well it might help. Okay, Yeah, I don't know.
I would just say. I mean, I also would say, like,
(42:51):
if you feel comfortable, like just you know, have have it,
lay a towel down, and yeah, lay a towel down.
But I wouldn't I would pockets stressed or over stressed.
Like I would not overstress about that because it's already
gonna be a little like nervous and anxious going into it,
being both of your first time, So don't like overthink
it with that aspect of it, and just see what happens.
(43:12):
Maybe you won't start your period around that time, maybe
it'll naturally delay itself for you. But I would just say,
don't don't stress yourself out more than you're already going
to be stressed, and let let what happens happens. And
if you wait a few more days, you've waited this,
it's fine. It's not the end of the world. If
it doesn't happen on your wedding night, it's okay. Save
it for the honeymoon. I don't think you're going to
(43:33):
be in that problematic for the wedding night and your
entire honeymoon. It's fine. Just go with it. He'll be fine.
Your advice is to wait. Well that I was kind
of thinking that too. I'm like, I always have said
how exhausted couples must be after the wedding, Like I
feel like I would just want to go home and
be like, go to sleep and then wake up the
(43:54):
next day and that be like the day. But I
would say, you've waited as long as you have. I
don't know how old is. You're fine if you don't
want it. If you don't want your first time to
be period sex, and you don't, I don't think you do.
I think you do. I'm team period sex. It is great. Innously,
I don't know what it's like obviously from the female perspective,
but y'all don't seem to love it, excepting Tanya, and
(44:18):
so until you're gonna love it, I want you to
be able to not worry about it. And also like
the first time, it's like I don't know how graphic
we can be, but like kind of dry and like,
you know, just as like natural lubricant. Oh my god,
thank me later, everybody who's listening, just try it. With
(44:39):
my experience, I think sex is an awkward thing for
a while. I think you gotta put points on the
board first, you know, you gotta like you gotta run
the clock a bit, so like it's just it's gonna
be awkward anyway. I say, if you want to do it,
go for it. I didn't have sex on my wedding, right, uh,
you know, because we were tired, and uh, you know,
it's just it's a crazy like culmination of so much
(45:00):
planning and stress and everything, and like, I'm sorry, the
last thing you want to do is do that. So
like put it off to the I'm with the way
till the honeymoon situation. But if you want to do it,
do it. It's gonna be awkward anyway. Yeah, like I'm
out numbered here, but wait, we said we're agreeing with you,
just not as graphically like excited about what you said.
(45:21):
We're just saying, like, go with go with the flow.
If it's flow, just go with the flag. There's only
one tailor sliss song, and that is red Wow. Good
one actually wrote a list of all the we didn't
need it today, all right. This is from anonymous. She says,
(45:44):
My boyfriend and I have been together four years. Met
through mutual friends after college. I've always thought he was
my soul mate. We're best friends. He's so kind, love
and respectful, not like other boyfriends I've had in the past.
That was in an emotionally abusive relationship before him, a
narcissist who made me apologize for everything all the time.
When I got out, I promised myself I would never
be treated that way again. Well, fast forward four years
(46:05):
into my current relationship. I'm ready for him to propose.
I love him so much, so does my family. We
live together, we have a dog and everything. It's going
so good. But he confessed to me that he's been
lying about two things. One, I asked him not to
watch porn, but apparently he's been lying to me and
watching it since Thanksgiving. Two a month ago, he was
(46:27):
away from me for three weeks in a work trip
and then went straight to a wedding with his college buddies.
I wasn't invited, and he missed his flight the next morning.
He told me it was because he got too drunk,
but really he stayed out till four a m with
his buddies partying and another girl's hotel room. He's being
honest now, but he lied initially, and now I'm going
back to feelings so insecure about myself in a relationship
and feeling I can't trust him. I just feel like
(46:48):
we're drifting apart and I don't know what to do.
M hmm. This seems very fixable to me in my opinion. Sure,
I mean, look, I don't like that he covered it
up and now he's telling you the truth. But I
(47:09):
don't like that, and I trust to me is everything.
But I feel like it's salvageable if you guys can
kind of like commit to coming back to the basics
of your relationship and maybe do some couples therapy and
kind of get to the root of why he lied
and why he didn't tell you the truth initially. You
know what I mean, Because maybe you know, there's a
(47:30):
reason for that. Maybe there's, you know, a reason why
he kept that from you. Maybe he felt like you
guys were growing apart and he didn't want to rock
the boat, you know, which is not an excuse. I'm
just saying, like, I don't know, kind of get to
the root of why he covered those things up. Um,
I don't know. I mean the porn thing I'm less
concerned about, But I think the porn thing is more
(47:51):
that he lied in. You know. Um, I think this
is tough because she was in a relationship that made
her question herself and her confidence, and I think him
doing this has like brought back feelings of that relationship,
and she said she would never let herself be treated
like that again. So I also think that trying something
(48:15):
like a couple of therapy or counseling or something where
y'all can both have an open space, because maybe it
is something like he's scared, like maybe there's a certain
reason why he feels that it's better for him to
lie than just be honest about it. And I think
that um, having that space to both be open and
honest together in front of someone who's not biased, would
(48:38):
be really helpful. But I also think, like, listen to
your gut, because if you've experienced this before and you're
feeling like it's making you question yourself again, then it's
you know, you've got to really pay attention to that
feeling because you don't want to end up in the
same situation you were in you do. But also, this
email services kind of like, you know, when you're trying
to make a decision, need to make a pros and
(48:59):
cons list. This email is a pros and cons list,
And even in this email your pros way outway your cons. Lying,
I think is uh an easier bridge to cross than cheating.
Cheating is tough. Lying you know, he's probably afraid of
your reaction. Blah blah blah. It's not good. But I
think it's something that you guys can work on and
(49:21):
regain that trust. I think that is fixable. Like Tanya said,
like always, I agree with Tany, but just not as graphically. Um,
I like it. I think it's fine. I think it's
gonna be okay. I think you guys can sleep together more.
I think that will help with the porn situation. And
the rest is just about honesty. He didn't do anything
he didn't cross any lines. Yeah, I lied, but he
(49:41):
didn't cross any lines. I think you're gonna be okay
because I think you're crazy about him. I think your
past trauma is causing you to question everything. But you
guys can work through this, all right, Taylor Swift song,
I need you to think about, like, what's really going on? Um,
where's your list? It's in my bag downstairs, in the
(50:03):
list I wrote it down. Yea. Um, this is this love? No, no, no,
I think this is um. I think this is delicate.
I think this is message in a bottle. What you
just how? Because I feel as though maybe she just
(50:29):
needs to write him a letter and put in a
bottle and make it like, let's work on. This is
not buying that load. Yeah, Tanya doesn't even buy her.
Maybe we can get a cliff Notes version of the
emails so that we don't have to bog down the time.
We just pre prescribed, okay, pre prescriptions. Okay, all right,
(50:53):
Well for today we're gonna go with nobody, no crime
and that that's pretty good. Actually, that's pretty good. Um.
And on that note, that is actually really good because
it's really good. There's no body involved. Um, we do
not have an episode this Thursday, but I did want
(51:14):
to remind you about Wango Tango because the tickets are selling.
It's going to be a part t in the US
of A should we were exposed thongs? Yeah, you have
to look now, like I don't know if my body
is ready for the exposed long look, but you and
(51:37):
put a pin in that and maybe I'll try to
find a cohesive fit that goes with the exposed though.
All right, um, we love you all, have a great week.
And um, you know what time it is? What? It's
thick thirty? Bye this Thelizza song, it's bad bitch o'clock. Yeah,
(51:58):
it's thick thirty. Wait, I was gonna give the do
I need to talk about the Wingo Tango tickets and
how to get the wheels are falling off this joint
Wango Tango tickets. Get them now, get them while they're hot.
SEC access dot com and the code is scrubber. Yes,
that is right. Okay, it's what time? It's thick alright,
(52:21):
thick thirty. We gotta gonna go up by love by