Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Sorry, did we do that.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Scrubbing in with Becca Tilly and Tanya rap An iHeartRadio Podcast.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Hello, everybody, we are scrubbing it.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Scrub a dub dub.
Speaker 3 (00:14):
We have royalty in the o R, so we're just gonna.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
Get right to it.
Speaker 4 (00:18):
Seven year anniversary, Like one of the chances we're doing
today are.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
Actual seven years scrubbing in anniversary.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
That's crazy.
Speaker 5 (00:25):
It is kismet and it actually like makes me emotional
that we have the two of you because obviously we've
had Camilla. We love you like you are fan favorite,
but we've been like feral over getting you Jessica Capshaw.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
So this is like really just seven am be careful
what you wish for.
Speaker 5 (00:43):
This is like a seven year anniversary gift gift gift gifts.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Yeah, yeah, no seriously.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Well that makes me so happy. That makes me so happy,
That makes my like my heart warm.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
So we left off.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Teeser.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
Oh yeah, yes, the teaser on If you haven't listened,
go listen to part on this episode.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Don't call it what it is?
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Yes, And.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
The question I ended that part one with was have
you kissed a woman since your Gray's Anatomy? Since as
Arizona Robbins.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
I love that that was a teaser question, and when
you asked it, you looked straight into my soul.
Speaker 6 (01:27):
So much.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
I was like.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Me, think about its obvious. No, I have not, but
I really had to think about it. The way she
was looking at me, I know, I was like, does
she know something I don't know? She does know, so
so the answer is no, you little tease doing the teasers.
I was. I love so much what you what you
both just said. I feel so I feel like it's
(01:57):
a gift to be in the space because seven years ago,
certainly I didn't even know. I don't even know that
I knew what a podcast was seven years ago.
Speaker 5 (02:04):
I really really makes me feel better because we've been
trying to get you for a minute.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
I never I never knew people have been keeping us apart.
Speaker 5 (02:20):
I know I did like to tread the line of
like bandgirl, but we try to keep it professional.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
I feel like it's like professional do.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
A great the point, but I really did not know.
But what I do know is that my first experience
of you two was also doing something that I had
not really done, which was doing a live event with
the Grays cast in Los Angeles, and I found the
event a little bit overwhelming because it was sort of
in my mind, it was the tipping point of when
(02:48):
Grays started getting watched in the rewatch world.
Speaker 7 (02:51):
People were streaming, yeah, the streaming world, and so it
it enumerated the exposure of the show and just how
many were watching it and therefore walking around the world
knowing who was in it, and it was live, and
I had never witnessed in person the passion that people
felt for the show.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
So I'd had the like, oh, I likes Anatomy, or
known that it did well, or like seen things on
message boards or whatever it was, but I had never
seen in person how the show made people feel. And
so it was it was an insane event. But getting
to the point, which was that we had the Q
and A and we saw the people and the people
were coming on the stage and everything else. But there
(03:34):
was this moment where there were escalators. I remember there
being near an escalator, this.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Carpet was that where it was.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
I remember we were there with the whole cast, But
I remember being closest to Jesse Williams at the time,
and I remember just being like, like just I truly
stayed very close to him because I was so intimidated
by the whole experience because it was just so vibrant
and like right there and such heightened emotions. And I
remember seeing you too, with your bright and shiny faces
(04:02):
and your enthusiasm, and you're just like and you were
dressed in scrubs. Yeah, and you guys were so excited,
and I remember thinking, hold on in my brain, like, Jessica,
hold on to that, like, hold on to that bright,
shiny excitement. That's what this is. It's not intimidating, it's
not that. It's just this is joyous, like be here
for the joy. So you guys, you all brought the
(04:24):
joy to that that time, and I felt like that
was a gift to me because it actually, I was
unclear at that moment. I sort of felt again intimidated.
It with a lot of people, a lot of stuff
and you all, seeing you all sort of like snapped
the picture into focus for me and helped me understand
why we were there and what we were doing.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
Wow, that is that is nice.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
We showed up in scrubs and everyone had their microphones and.
Speaker 5 (04:45):
Their their lights, like their mic flags, like everybody we
were with, like all the press, like cameras and stuff
when we have our iPhones.
Speaker 4 (04:54):
Mismatched blue scrubs were like, they're probably who are these girls,
But y'all were so one, so kind to us.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
Yeah, I felt like we were like I remember what
I was wearing.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
I remember your outfit, my favorite outfit of the day.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I remember that.
Speaker 5 (05:11):
I'm actually really sad because remember Kevin McKidd was there,
and we hated him at the time, like we don't
want to talk to his character. Yeah, we didn't like
his characters. We were like, we don't want to talk
to Owen Hunt. But I'm sad because I feel like
a misopportunity because you like.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
You've got him on the show to I told him,
told him, and I told him.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
I was like, I have hated you for I don't
remember how many years since he came.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
On sind On Christina.
Speaker 5 (05:36):
Since he cheated and when Teddy cheated on him, I
was like, good for her, you deserve it. And then
we had him on the podcast and he was so
lovely and so nice that I was like, I love
Owen Hunt now and he turned me into a lover
and it felt weird, but I shift.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
The shift character for like hearing like we hate you,
and he's like, it's cool, I'm on the pot.
Speaker 5 (05:59):
Like I love it was so game, he like did
not he didn't take it personal at all.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
I remember early Owen Hunt was also just always so intense. Yeah,
and still it's like that.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
I think Owen's just intense. He's more intense you in
the musical episode.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
How intense he was.
Speaker 6 (06:18):
Going to be?
Speaker 2 (06:19):
My can we know? As your question was, did But
his part of it was like, you know, it was
the one where he was like him and Kyler and
they were operating.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
It was like, oh, dont breathe, just breathe just actually
look look.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
What did he send the kids?
Speaker 8 (06:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (06:49):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. I love it, Kevin.
But yeah, it was a lot. It was just like
very It was like, yeah, he was like the Jets
of the Sharks.
Speaker 4 (06:58):
It was like, I just need to know what y'all
did when you got the news that you were doing
a musical episode.
Speaker 1 (07:05):
I want to know this too.
Speaker 4 (07:08):
I would never about three people who were thriving excited
about it.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
You were one of them.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
No, No, there's so many things I can say.
Speaker 8 (07:22):
Well, I have a little bit of a puppy dog
energy in the sense that when someone like gets excited
about something, I'm like, yeah, would we do you would
do that?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Okay, that's okay. That's so I was a little puppy
dog and I was like, were you in a musical episode?
Of course we're doing a musical episode. That makes perfect sense,
does it? I don't know, but yeah, for sure, we're
going to do that. And so I was a little
bit that energy. I just had a baby, so I
was a little bit also hormonal, tired and hormonal energy.
(07:55):
And then once I went to the coaching session where
we were to be assessed to figure out who was
going to say which song, I think I had higher
expectations for how many songs I was going to get
than I was actually given. And so it was maybe
a little disappointing when we found out that I, you know,
saying one line.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
It was impactful though, let me tell you it was impactful.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Thank you. And then I was like the chorus for
how to Save Life? So you know, I mean I was.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Out.
Speaker 3 (08:32):
I don't think you realized.
Speaker 5 (08:33):
So Becka has been watching Grey's Anatomy since she was
like in high school, like she's been she's been watching.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
Like Live like to Grays.
Speaker 5 (08:40):
I started watching when I was I don't know how,
maybe ten years ago, and I binge like the first
nine or ten seasons in like a matter of months.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
And so I got to the musical episode and she
was like.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Get ready, ready, ready for watch it.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
And I was like, I love this episode.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
I want to take an edible and watch I want
to watch it with a like taking with the.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Higher consciousness.
Speaker 4 (09:15):
Rand experiencing that because it felt like a fever dream,
totally sober.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Well, you know, I'm gonna say something I've I've never
said before. Do you remember Seene where CALLI and are
driving and I.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
Like falls on the orby the finger.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yeah, the finger wiggle. We had a choreographer for that.
Speaker 9 (09:36):
With the finger for the fingers, they didn't all literally
had a choreographer on set to help me time out
my finger going back and forth.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
And I was so afraid of perform by the way,
I was just lip syncing, but I I was I
even singing or was it actually I don't even.
Speaker 3 (10:03):
Singing.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
I definitely think it was a lipsing situation.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
My no joke choreographer for that finger.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
Well, I loved it. I think the episode deserved more
to be honest, more respect.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Okay, okay, someone sitting to a small minority.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
I'm in the minority with this.
Speaker 5 (10:21):
But I feel like I really loved Arizona Robbins, Like
to me, she was she was me like I was,
like if I were.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
In a the lesbian thing.
Speaker 5 (10:31):
Yeah, my lesbian thing, but I would be like skating
around like that would like I loved your character like
I loved.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yeah, I'm still here. But you know it's so crazy
and super nerdy?
Speaker 9 (10:46):
Is that? So?
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Did I? And I love that because that means I've
done my job. Well, I am, but I'm really not.
Speaker 1 (10:58):
Yeah, I think you guys are so actually real.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
I always thought you were, but I'm realizing that you're sure.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
You give me beca energy which is not Arizona.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Mine is the queer bar.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
Yeah, interesting enough.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
But you know, I I think that as the character
came together, there were so many things that I mean,
there's so many things that I do that I that
that she does and behaviors that are are similar to me.
But but no, we're very different.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Positivity is the same. You're extremely positive.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
I am. I am. I really tried it. Yeah, I
that it is. It's actually I don't. It's actually not effort.
It's it's really mindset I had. I was telling people
I have this. I had this wild epiphany there to
day where I realize and it's where we really learn
a lot from each other, I find because she represents
a different perspective and I not only want it, I
actually genuinely need it in my life. But I found,
(12:00):
or I realize that very often when people are hurtful,
or when someone hurts my feelings, or when I see
other people hurt other people's feelings that I love and
I have some investment in it, I almost instantly go
to throwing love at that person and feeling sort of
bad for them. Like when people hurt people, I'm like, oh, man,
like what must you be feeling like that? You need
to do that.
Speaker 4 (12:21):
I do not, but because most people just take it
and they're like, I'm hurt, they don't. They don't even
have the awareness to go, oh, they're hurting, so let
me show them love.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
That's a practice, It's it's just.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
An automatic for me. It just happens, and I'm I
do love that about me, and sometimes it's not right,
you wish and I'm like, they're also any.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Are you a Scorpio? Oh no, you're a sagittarius.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Okay, Yeah, well I have a little scorpio, but I
was raised.
Speaker 5 (12:54):
By Okay, yeah, yeah, that's interesting. It's a similar dynamic.
Speaker 1 (12:58):
Yeah, I was gonna ask because we talked about this on.
Speaker 3 (13:02):
Scorpio.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
You're a scorpio and what are you cancer? Okay? What's
your rising though? Is that the one you're perceived as.
I'm a libra.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I'm a Leo.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
So that's why I'll get along because she's a leo.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
She's a leo.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Yeah, wow, I'm leo.
Speaker 6 (13:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:31):
Before we went on part one of this, go listen
and call it what it is, we y'all asked how
we met and then I said she wasn't super warm,
and then you had a huge reaction.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
To that I did, and we didn't get to hear
the story about it. So I want to hear now
and you can take your sides and let us know you.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
I feel like I'm going to be with.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
Interesting. Here's what happened, and then Jessica can tell her
lies after. Okay. In I was my first year on
the show. I was not even a series regular. I
was recurring, and I didn't know that like food trucks,
you know once in a while came on to set
(14:17):
and were a gift from somebody, right, Like they were
treating everybody.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
To like a food truck. Right.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
So this food truck was on set, came in and
it was a Burger truck and on the little signage
on it said like, thank you cast and crew from
Shonda Rhymes. And I was like, oh my god, that's
very cool and sweet and it's Shonda. Well, I need
to like I'm appreciative, Like I'm gonna take a picture
of this and I'm gonna tweet it out and be like,
this is so awesome that Shanda did this, like thank you,
(14:43):
And that's what I did. And then I went and
I sat down in my little cast chair, and why
don't you explain what happened?
Speaker 3 (14:52):
Hey, what's wrong with that?
Speaker 1 (14:54):
Yeah? What is wrong with that?
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Well? In the picture that she hook, there might have
been a Jessica cap shot on her on her on
her lunch break food break. Yeah, yea with a.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Heartily dressed burger. She was motivating a burger in the picture.
I didn't know that, but she had like she was
like shoving it down. She was deep throating a burger
and I was not aware, and.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
You know, you might have been eaten in one bite perhaps,
And Jessica Stormed became the dragon that I am, and
she was like inside dragon to me, and I was like,
she's inflated. Honestly, every time she tells the story.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Story save for.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
The screws.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
Pointed and she literally roared like you have to ask permission?
Are you host a picture? Don't you? What are you
new here? Yeah? And from then on it was icy.
I thought she was strategic a sabotage. Yeah, she thought
(16:14):
it was sabotage. You guys, we call her burger Gate.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
Burger sabotage Hersha and nannies.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Yeah, I saw that.
Speaker 3 (16:23):
Mom here.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
You know, well, you don't really have to be aside
because look how it ended up. I think that there's
a lot of reasons why. But it's actually for me
because it makes me think of something I haven't thought
of before. And you you touched on it in the
other podcast, the one that's on our.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
I don't call it what it is, which is you
were wrong.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
No, that's what I was gonna say. What I was
gonna say is this, I think that I was very
much living in you know whatever that was, which was
probably ten years ago, fifteen years ago, was I was
still learneder the impression that you had to be perfect
right right, that anything that was out there of you
(17:03):
needed to be perfect, perfect, or at least needed to
be what you wanted to be like it had to
be polished. Yeah, but I mean or if your if
your image was not polished, then not polished. But it
had to be consistent with whatever it was that you
were right with the fan saw, Yeah, and I think
(17:24):
that there was a there was a little bit more.
It was I was a little slower to understanding that
the belonging and the connection piece hinges on being able
to be real. And sometimes you have just gone back
from having a baby and you're on set with your
(17:45):
gorgeous new costar who you don't know very well, and
a Burger truck comes and you put a lot of
stuff on that double double cheeseburger.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Then you eat and someone takes a picture of it.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Well, by the way, no one could find the picture.
It's probably never existed, or it got existed, and then
it did.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
It definitely existed after you yelled, she probably deleted it
right away.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
I didn't pointed yell.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
It was maybe minutes I walked from the picture and
within like ten minutes it was like it was like
a tornado.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
But here's how I'm telling you, what did I like?
Speaker 1 (18:25):
What did you feel? Because your news still wanted to
I remember turning to my interns, and you know what's
really funny, this is kind of the dynamic on the show, right,
being like, oh my god, she's so mad, I don't
know what to do. I don't know what to say.
And it was like very much like intern attending like
you screwed, you know.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
But that's probably a really good example of what I'm
a call back to what something I just admitted that
I do, which is like I was likely hurt.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
Ye, then I had something to do and I.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Gave it to show because it was equal.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Rights for all, and so I think that I I
definitely definitely think that that's what was happening.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And it was tough though, because we we it was.
I knew that she thought that I was like not
just like a typical like actress of like ha haha,
I'm coming in and yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Can down the house, you know. And in fairness, I
had worked with a lot of people who were like, yeah,
so I had like lived experience, right, it was a
fair potential assessment.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
Yeah, No, it's a different.
Speaker 5 (19:33):
It was like such a different because I feel like
twelve years ago when I started on the morning show
and like the dynamic there was like not what it
is now. It's it was not women helping women. It
was the opposite. Yeah, women on for themselves.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
You know.
Speaker 5 (19:48):
So it's like I get where your headspace was because
it just wasn't like it is now. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Yeah, because I very much had experiences when it worked
that were truly like sitting in the makeup chair having
you know, your post lunch touch up and as you know,
someone who'd been there for longer than you or higher
up on the call sheet coming over and being like,
yeah can you pause? You need to stand up and
walk out. And because it's my turn, like I've.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
Been, I mean, and I think that.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
I try very hard to. I'm proud of myself for this.
I adapt. Yeah, you know, I just I figured out
I don't have a huge ego, so I don't have
like I don't go there. I sort of go to
what makes everybody? What what makes what's the price a piece?
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Here?
Speaker 6 (20:41):
Right?
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Talking about herself as a recovering people pleaser. Yes, me too.
Oh my god, you guys are so bad. Yeah, it's
so hard to bring.
Speaker 4 (20:50):
Do you feel like you're done with that? But I
do feel like I'm much better. Like I think I
have a lot more of Like I think of myself
ten years ago and I think of how different that
mentality was versus now when I think about things that
I would like people please so much on. But it's
pretty ingrained. Yeah, it's ingrained to me. Yeah, it takes
(21:12):
effort to like not people please for me.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Yeah. Yeah, Well, I think there's also two aspects that
I've heard you say that might contribute that I share
as well. Mine's more Midwestern, but being from the Midwest
and being a woman. Yeah, I mean, we talked about
this with Julian Huff. It's there's a sort of collective
there's a collective belief that girls are meant to be
(21:37):
kind and be accommodating and make things okay. If, by
the way, that actually is in your talent set right,
because there's some people who actually can't. It's actually it
actually has a talent to be able to make everybody happy.
It's not one that everybody can do right, and those
people just sort of get to like sidestep the responsibility.
But if you can do that, and I mean, I
(21:58):
grew up as a child of divorce. I grew up
in you know, going back and forth between two families.
I grew up going to thirteen different schools before I
was thirteen. Like if I didn't figure out how to
make new situations, okay friends, and I didn't for a while,
and that was not fun. So when I finally got
into and I remember saying to my mom because my
mom wasn't an actress, well, no, she was an actress.
(22:19):
My mom was an actress. I would go wherever she
went to make a movie. And I remember being like twelve,
going into like seventh grade, and I still can't believe
that I would have the strength to do this, because
I did understand that we went places, because that's how
she made a living. But I said, I'm done. I'm like,
(22:42):
no more. I can't, I can't do it again. I
cannot move one more time. I cannot be the new girl.
I cannot have no friends. I cannot, I cannot, I cannot.
And that's when she had to adjust her life to
create the life in Los Angeles and then go off
and do jobs. And seventh and eighth grade was really
hard for me because I didn't have any friends. And
(23:02):
it wasn't until ninth grade that I actually I found
my people and I understood how the greatest talk about gift,
I mean, the greatest gift in the world is connection
and feeling like you have a team, feeling like you
have somebody who's gonna notice if you're sick that day. Yeah,
And I only I honestly think it only takes one
(23:24):
if you have more grade. But truly, I've always been
sort of like that's always been my mindset too. I've
never belonged to like one big group of girlfriends. I've
always had, you know, really deep and meaningful relationship with
a bunch of different people. And I'm a little bit
of a floater. But those times where you can, you know,
make friends, that made the difference, and that really was
the difference between sadness and happiness for me in middle
(23:47):
school going into high school.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Wow, that impacts you. It's such an age where you're
like so imparted to that.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Where was the shift after Burger Gate where y'all said
I love you?
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (23:58):
I want to be your best friend and do a podcast.
We were we were slowly warming up a little bit
towards the end of the season. I remember the episode
where there's the storm and the lights go out and
the tree comes in and Alex and Joe have like
their first kiss and Arizona and Cali.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
Wait, what when Arizona chief that cheeze?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
Yes, that episode we had to work together. We were
doing this with the baby, and I remember feeling like, oh,
it's getting a little warmer. I was getting warmer vibes.
And then it was the end of the season and
there was a rat party and we had we were
friends with so many people that we were friends with
so many of the same people, and we invited everyone
(24:43):
to a dinner before the rat party, and nobody showed
up but us.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
That's so sad that I think that the key part
of that, as you were talking that were like, no,
it was substantial.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
It wasn't like we were being left.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
It was actually it was actually genuinely because they will.
But as you were telling that story, I just flashed
on the fact that because we didn't spend a ton
of time together, and probably because you were new and
I was an I don't know is that when we
finally had time to be together. I mean the gold,
(25:20):
the magic, like the thing that you have like no
other is how funny you are.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
Well, we laugh and you guys do too. We laughed
so much. You're so funny though, Like, I don't know
if people realize how funny. They can't.
Speaker 2 (25:33):
They don't.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
They can't they well because.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
They wouldn't know it from Joe Wilson. And I mean, like,
you're not funny, but like you're funny and you're going
one You're not serious, she's not funny, but Camilla is
very funny.
Speaker 3 (25:48):
Fun to her finding fun to her.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
No, I mean they've they've written in more comedy over
the years, but but no, that was like the actually,
you know what the coolest thing about that dinner was
because there was a part of me that was like, well,
grew you for being like a little bit mean. But
she at that dinner, she said, hey, I'm so sorry
about that incident. I was feeling just really insecure at
(26:12):
the time and I was having I just had the baby,
and I was and I thought that was so fucking cool. Yeah,
that because it's hard to do and to not just
say I'm sorry about that moment. That was like not
I was not feeling it or myself or whatever. And
then to also like be vulnerable and tell me that
all her feelings and I was like, I love her.
(26:35):
I was like, if she wants me best friends, I'm
in Like, I just love that vulnerable.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
That's tough.
Speaker 1 (26:40):
It's really hard.
Speaker 4 (26:41):
And to say I was feeling insecure and like admit
where you yeah, we're in the wrong, is like that
not I would say, majority of people don't have the
emotional best or maturity to do that.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
No, they don't.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
No. And then I love just and then it was
just love it.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
And then it was just like it was like.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
Seasons after the season nine, this is twenty twelve.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
Yeah, but then how was it for you? When Arizona
Robbins left the cell?
Speaker 2 (27:10):
That was just.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
The meanest thing they've ever done. Honestly, it was happening nowhere.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
It felt so like abrupt and I was like, what happened?
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Yeah, what happened? So many things? So many things?
Speaker 1 (27:25):
I did you know it was coming?
Speaker 9 (27:27):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
We talk about this a lot because this is a
story that has a day some day to be told.
It's not today.
Speaker 10 (27:51):
Champagne, bottom of Champagne.
Speaker 1 (27:55):
It was a multi layered situation. Have you ever been
asked that before? I think this might be the first
time you've been asked that.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
I've been asked that before, and I've never said what
I feel, which is that there is a story and
that I'm just not ready to talk about it.
Speaker 9 (28:15):
Then.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
And I will, but I'm just not there yet. So
when other people have asked me before, I think I've
just sort of bed and switched. And in the spirit
of the things that we've been talking about, I think
can take over and you can just sort of figure
out how to say, you know, I mean, you can
say you can pivot, pivot, yeah, and you and and
and that and and and I stand by that that's
that that was appropriate and and and so yeah, there's
(28:42):
a time and a place, and there's probably on a podcast.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
And I think, as with all stories, you know, and
all experiences, the the one that I would relay is mine. Right,
So there's a lot of different things that were going on.
I think that you know, there were It's funny because
there was so much speculation and people were so upset.
Speaker 3 (29:05):
I was devastated, devastating devastated.
Speaker 2 (29:08):
I will speak to that which is that was that
was very very hard for me to be dealing with
my own processing and the fans that there was a
collective sadness or a feeling for those people that did that,
(29:28):
that that that character was important.
Speaker 3 (29:30):
You just wink at us twice and we can start some.
Speaker 5 (29:32):
Somebody can start some petitions like you just give us
the nod and we have a force behind us.
Speaker 3 (29:40):
Let me tell you.
Speaker 1 (29:41):
The scrubbers they are. They're ready to go.
Speaker 3 (29:44):
They want us to People's Choice Awards, so they can
do anything.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
They can do anything.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
I do actually that and I will say that you
know what what I what I mean by how how
I was affected by people's feelings is a true, true
compliment to the way in which our fans express their
excitement and their gratitude and their their connection and the
(30:13):
and just how much it means to them. Because you know, listen,
at the end of the day, you know, if we
screamed it, and if we screamed it into a vacuum,
it wouldn't matter, right, if it all happen like in
the middle of the woods where everyone's watching, right, it
would not be satisfying. It would not be what it is,
and it is truly because when people say this, and
you right, but I think they say it because they
mean it. We're literally nothing without the people who watch
(30:36):
the show. And so the fact that we have people
who watch the show with their whole hearts and believe
and in things and trust in things and and and
give us as performers on the show their time, it's
everything I mean. And also it just doesn't happen all
that often, you know, I mean, not at this level.
And so when you watch, you know, I'm I love
(30:56):
being an audience member and I love watching things, and
I have that feeling when I'm super immersed and I
completely I'm just double downed on watching something. It's it's
one of the greatest feelings ever. So the fact that
I get to be on the other side of that
sometimes is She's super lucky.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
It's true, though you change. I mean, I literally this
is like a.
Speaker 4 (31:15):
I've talked about this, like when before I was with
my girlfriend, before I even had thoughts because I was
so like Christian that I never even thought of a woman.
But I was obsessed with Callian Arizona. I would read
fan fiction of Meredith and Derek and Callian Arizona, which
it's not for someone who's just fully straight, is not
(31:39):
for if you're reading cal Zona fan fiction Reassessed for
listeners out there, there's a surprise.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
Coming for you, coming, She's coming, But you did you change?
Like that relationship game?
Speaker 4 (32:01):
I mean it was like one of the first relationships
that a lot of queer people saw that they were like.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
We talked about that in life.
Speaker 4 (32:05):
You know, I see I see myself and someone on
on my TV on a network television show, which was
so important.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
And that I did not see coming from the beginning,
And when it was revealed that Arizona was gay and
like absolutely, unapologetically, steadfastly with full permanent and strength of
heart and conviction and total like when we were talking
(32:34):
about like which parts of her are me and which
parts are not? I've never been as confident as Arizona
is ever. And in the play there were oftentimes where
I would say to the writers like is there like
is there any should she play this? Like a little
unsure of what of what she's thinking, saying, feeling the past.
(32:57):
And it was always and this is because sometimes you
just got to trust the system. Ye Shanda and the
powers that be that were writing those words and creating
those characters. It was always, always, always Arizona is resolutely,
always has been, always will be a strong, proud gay woman.
(33:22):
And that hadn't been happening on television.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
No, yeah, no, And she was she was a feminine
and Barbie, Yeah, she's like Barbie, Barbie, literally.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
Do we have that?
Speaker 1 (33:39):
We do? They should be in the.
Speaker 2 (33:46):
Mark it out?
Speaker 3 (33:47):
Mark it out?
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
But I mean I think that that was that was
a sort of incredible thing that happened, and that was
that was magic, like that was bigger than all of
us and m hm. And I do think that it
was very purposeful sort of having her come in the
way that she did.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
Camilla.
Speaker 4 (34:22):
First of all, do you like you on link together
on the show?
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Camilla?
Speaker 4 (34:25):
Joe?
Speaker 1 (34:26):
God? This again you guys, I know you hate them together? Skylar? Yeah,
isn't he here? Yeah, we're talking tomorrow.
Speaker 4 (34:40):
But we heard you talk about how like you thought
that was gonna be Joe's person, And I.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
Was like, yes, well here's what happened. I knew that
they were going to bring someone in for Joe and
you know, recur, and I thought like, any we know this,
any recurring on the show can stand the test of
time and end up a permanent because you were both
case and case in point case and point. So they're
bringing a guy on, and I said, if you bring
(35:05):
a guy on and he's anything like Alex corrupt, it's
not gonna work. Right, Like, my pitch for you guys
is that you bring on someone that's like cute, nerdy, funny,
like brings out a different side of her. And that's
kind of where they were going with it. Anyway, they
were of the same mind, right, And then Christa Vernoff,
(35:26):
our showrunner, text me and said it's gonna be Skylar Aston,
who already was like, oh my god, this is gonna
be amazing because hello, he's fantastic and everything he's in
and he encompasses all of those things. But you never
know what chemistry is gonna be like with someone. And
when he got to set, we met before he even
started filming. He'd come in for something I forget, maybe
(35:48):
a costume fitting, and I ran into him. Then we
walked back to base camp and I was like, Hey,
I'm gonna be like your new girlfriend for a little bit,
and and we just had really natural chemistry, like it
just worked. And he made me laugh so much. He's
so charming and and and it was just really easy.
(36:11):
And I thought this is going to be it. This
could be it for her because it brought out a
new side. It was so different, it was lighter, like
I just thought it could go somewhere. Skyler brooked a show.
He was not a series regular on our show, and
he booked and that was it. And but they were
(36:32):
already teasing, like the Link thing. How do you wait?
I have to ask you guys, how do you feel
about Link right now?
Speaker 4 (36:40):
Saying, first of all, I love him. He was on
our podcast and we love him as a Yeah, this
on his.
Speaker 1 (36:48):
Actual Yeah, it's not quite.
Speaker 3 (36:52):
It's not it's not quite.
Speaker 1 (36:54):
About Link and Joe together.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
It's just it's just's it.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
It's not you feel like there's chemistry or no, I
feel like you have chemistry. But it feels very friendly.
It feels friend chemistry.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
Frank Cam, you have.
Speaker 3 (37:07):
Friend Yeah, not bed Cam, but y'all have.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
Alex, I have Beg camon Allan are you wait hold on,
I'm sorry because I'm not up to speed.
Speaker 2 (37:17):
How deep are we in with Link? Are you married?
Speaker 4 (37:21):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Well, well she's at the end of the season last
year with his baby. Okay, she hasn't told me. People
pregnant all the time. It doesn't matter on the show.
They're pretty they're pretty deep.
Speaker 3 (37:36):
They're pretty deep. It's not for me.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
Do you feel like they're in game?
Speaker 3 (37:41):
It's not for me. You're not asking me.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
No, no, this is not a spoiler. Last time I
went in, they gave me a laundry list of reasons
why it was not going to work. There was something
he'd done early on our set, and you're like, you're
they're real pregnant. I I think, yeah, I think yes.
(38:08):
But what's hard for me too, is you have to
remember that, like I work with Chris Karmic, I love
Chris Carmack, is also that element of like when you
adore the actor you're working with you yeah, yes.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
But also, isn't it funny how sometimes you hear all
these stories about how when when the actors get along
really well, it's actually not as much chemistry as when
the characters and then I don't get along.
Speaker 4 (38:33):
That's like Rachel McAdams and Ryan and the Notebook, that's
a hard one together and they ended.
Speaker 3 (38:38):
Up dating, but they didn't like each other.
Speaker 1 (38:40):
Each other, but they almost had to recast. It was
so bad. Yes, they did not. I will never forget
seeing that movie.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
I made my girls watch Jerry Maguire in The Notebook
to learn what romance.
Speaker 1 (38:55):
Which one they like better.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
They were so hard I rolling when we were watching Notebook.
I might have gotten them on the tag on the
attack watch that.
Speaker 5 (39:03):
You gotta watch Love Island with them.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Like I need the romans.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
I gotta send up for the kids here I gotta be.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
But by the way I speak, you know, I actually
did laugh really hard because my girls are now fine.
They didn't really care about Graysnonomy at all, but then
all their friends did, and so now they're watching, and
now they're really into it, and so uh they're both
at different parts, and uh, I think they just crossed
over to when I arrived. Arrived, and I keep reading
like I can't wait to see how this all goes,
(39:38):
because they know they were there.
Speaker 1 (39:41):
Do you like worry about like your nude stuff?
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Okay, so this is my point. So Poppy says to me,
Oh my gosh, I got the episode. Blah blah blah
blah blah. But then all of a sudden, the door
opened and you're in the shower with CALLI and I
look away. Yes, of course it's gonna be weird. But
when when I was doing when, I mean they were
all tiny, Yeah, you were basically I don't think that
(40:06):
on some levels, like I thought I would die there, right.
Speaker 5 (40:09):
But again it's also like your it's not I mean,
it's you, but it's not you, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (40:14):
Obviously we talked about that a lot. But but again,
I'm the daughter of an actress and I remember my
mom did a show one time and I think she like.
Speaker 10 (40:21):
Showed her butt and I was like, oh god, yeah,
that could be the day that my kids find out
about Californication is going to be a situation.
Speaker 3 (40:32):
Hold are your kids now, I.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
Mean they're watching that. Anytime there's a problem in my household. Yeah,
it's going to be a I mean, like, you know,
another ten years, like that's that's tough, that's I know.
I mean, ill at school is going to be like
I saw your mom's for.
Speaker 2 (40:49):
Sure, But that was a while ago. I last year
was I was going to do something that let's just
put it this way. We had to. So when you're
when there's a possibility of you doing nudity. You have
to like clause it out with your lawyers, like you
got to have real explicit Have you guys.
Speaker 1 (41:08):
Ever had anyone talk about this with you guys? I
don't know there was a nudity clause. Tell we gotta
tell you guys a little bit.
Speaker 2 (41:16):
Yeah, leave you with this when you are when something
is written, well, actually I don't even know how to
describe it. So let's do it together.
Speaker 8 (41:27):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (41:28):
You'll read a script and and either the nudity or
the sex scenes are either explicit or they're just sort
of like general, like it's not it's not explicit what
they're going to do. It might just be like and
they fall into bed and then whatever. But it's not explicit, right,
It's not like and then her hand goes to and
(41:48):
then his tongue, his tongue, his whatever, whatever whatever combination.
And if it's explicit, then you know what you're signing
up for. But if it's just a love scene, then
you make it need to figure out what as an
actor you're comfortable doing. And so that's when the lawyers
(42:08):
come in and it becomes very explicit. Like I remember
having one where it was like and she will.
Speaker 10 (42:13):
Show up to the first three quarters of her back
but not below the Yeah.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
I remember in my Californication when it was like literally
my lawyer called me. He was like, okay, so because
I was topless, I shot my butt. But they wanted
to know how far down by the vagina they could shoot.
So he had to like go through like how like
how many inches of pubic hair down? And it was
like that detailed because you had to protect yourself. You
(42:44):
had to be really specific because they.
Speaker 3 (42:48):
Go down to your butt.
Speaker 1 (42:50):
It could be the butt hole, the butle. I feel
like I actually clause to the clause.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
Always so we didn't know. We didn't have used to.
I mean when I was there, we didn't have intimacy coordinators,
which that I would have been very grateful for.
Speaker 1 (43:09):
We did not, not till last night. But it very
it's very recent.
Speaker 2 (43:14):
It's very recent.
Speaker 4 (43:15):
But the whole industry you just the director telling you
how to move and what yes.
Speaker 2 (43:22):
And I think that that's always a very sort of
very talking about vulnerable, a very vulnerable thing because very hard.
It's also like okay, what's like where is the action happening?
And is it happening? Like is it between action and
cut and then are you like, obviously it is, but
but there's it's just a very nuanced.
Speaker 3 (43:40):
And how many times are you doing that?
Speaker 2 (43:42):
And how many times are you doing it? And also
where are like where is your hand going? And where
is your So I was the first time I was
lesbian on television. I was on The L Word and
I was myself and Jennifer Peels and I'm supposed to
be like the naughty, like hot for teacher girl and
and she had been on it was probably like their
fourth season, so she was she had so much experience
(44:05):
with all the love scenes. She's like the most. She's
an incredible actress. She's been working for so long. And again,
so many love scenes me like zero love scenes. And
I was terrified. And it wasn't that I was that
I wasn't wanting to show up and do everything that
I was meant to be doing and bringing I was
so insecure. I was like, worried, I put my hand
(44:26):
where she put her hand, How is this going to
look like?
Speaker 1 (44:29):
All that?
Speaker 2 (44:30):
And she was such a pro and she was so
kind and we really genuinely talked about choreographing. We choreographed
the scene. It was in a car, and it was
like it was I just kept thinking of my head.
I'm she felt goes and buckled, hand goes to boob
and goes to the left, just.
Speaker 9 (44:51):
Nipple.
Speaker 3 (44:53):
I could never be an.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
You know.
Speaker 2 (45:06):
It was it was a real I mean so, I
you know, we again, we choreographed it on our own.
But I mean, I think I imagine it might be
really really great for actors that find that more challenging
to have someone just really like saying like, here's here's
what we're doing, and everybody knows what we're doing, so
no one's surprised by hand going someplace like there's rules,
(45:26):
there's it's not boundaryless. It's because guys, what we're at work,
it's not it's not. No one's in a volunteer position.
And no one's doing this because they want to make
out someone else. They're doing it because it's a story.
Speaker 3 (45:38):
They're so crazy, it's crazy. It's crazy.
Speaker 5 (45:42):
I put myself in that position, Like I think about
myself doing that.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
I'm like, you can't, no, I can't imagine that.
Speaker 3 (45:48):
Oh my gosh, nothing would be harder.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
Do you watch Sex and the City, Oh gosh, I
mean not that have not called sexy and just.
Speaker 4 (46:00):
I have not.
Speaker 2 (46:01):
I haven't watched one frame of it.
Speaker 3 (46:03):
Callie. Callie is yes, there are.
Speaker 2 (46:07):
And there Chay.
Speaker 4 (46:09):
We were having this conversation earlier on the podcast about
how people fall in love with you when they first
see you, right from what they first saw you in
so then it's like they evolve with you, because what
a true fan will do. They evolve with you, but
they'll always remember what they.
Speaker 3 (46:24):
Always remember your first time.
Speaker 2 (46:25):
Yeah, yes, and I know what it's like. I mean,
there are some characters that will live in my mind
forever that started out as really evil, dark, awful characters
and I'm like, never again, Like I will never watch this.
I cannot see that person.
Speaker 1 (46:39):
Oh yeah, yeah of course, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (46:42):
You never forget your first time.
Speaker 1 (46:43):
You never You'll never forget.
Speaker 5 (46:45):
Never forget that, We'll never forget our first time with you.
We also wanted to pass along our message from our
good friend Kate Walsh.
Speaker 1 (46:52):
She says high, she says, sigh.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
I love her. I love Kate Walsh. You know what,
she 's an incredible role model because she she My
experience of her is that she is resolutely, confidently and
supremely herself. I never saw I mean, given that I
sort of wish that there was not so much people
pleasing on my end of things. She is like a badass.
(47:14):
She comes in, she's like, that's what that is. That's
what that is.
Speaker 5 (47:16):
We met her today at the panel and then we
told her that we were and she was like, oh,
tell them.
Speaker 2 (47:20):
I said hi, and I was like, oh, I was
texting with her as we wrap this up, scrubbing in,
call it what it is?
Speaker 1 (47:28):
Can we promise that we do this again?
Speaker 2 (47:30):
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 6 (47:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (47:32):
And there's nothing better to me than having any sort
of podcast with wine.
Speaker 3 (47:37):
Every podcast we have with Wine is like, this.
Speaker 1 (47:39):
Is our first, by the way, you popped our cherry,
this is our first alcohol pop goes here we go,
our first alcohol podcast.
Speaker 3 (47:49):
These are my favorite. I love them.
Speaker 2 (47:51):
I love it you.
Speaker 1 (47:51):
Okay, thank you for the podcast.
Speaker 2 (47:59):
Cheers call it bought it and we call it scrub
as we do. Oh yeah, let's call it scrubbing in.
Speaker 6 (48:20):
Mm hmmm.