July 26, 2022 • 44 mins
Tanya went to Selena Gomez’s 30th birthday party and has some stories to share! Did she run into Jennifer Aniston?? Which celebrities did she hang out with?? We get a full recap on Sel’s big night!
Becca shares some advice for a Scrubber going through a long distance relationship.
And we get down and dirty about water parks.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya Red and I
Heart radio podcast. Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in. We
are scrubbing in. It is a Monday, and um you know,
I told Becca I had a very frantic, uh morning,
(00:21):
and I decided that I'm going to switch it around
today right now, and it's not gonna be frantic. It's
gonna be pleasant and we're gonna have fun on the podcast.
That's right, that's right, that's right. You know what they say,
you know what they say, what goes down must come up.
And you may have heard in your life what goes
up must come down, But Tanya says today today what
(00:44):
is down must come up correct And that has many
different connotations depending on where your mind is that today.
Oh you mean, like a wiener, when it goes down,
it can always come back up. God willing um Mark
(01:05):
is in a what looks to be a garage or basement.
It's hard to say it's a basement. It's my father
in law's work bench. I am in Franklin, Wisconsin with
the family, although the family has abandoned me. They're up
in the Wisconsin Dells at a water park. The biggest
water park in North America. It's called Noah's Ark. Stuck
in this basement working this week. Is it really called
(01:27):
Noah's Ark? Yeah? Is it? Is it religious based or
it's what happened if we didn't escape on the arc,
like you endure the flood at this water park? Water
parks I have Like when I was a young, water
park was like the ultimate destination. I couldn't think of
anything I'd rather do than go to a water park.
(01:47):
But as an adult, I have I have changed from that?
Did you are you kidding me? I thrived at water park?
I would like count my lucky stars if I go.
I loved water parks. Were you just trape thing around,
like flirting with boys, flopping around? Did you like fake
a drowning or something? But like the wave pools, like
(02:07):
where everything went down? Do you all picture Tanya kind
of like in the sand lot the guy who like
sees the lifeguard and and tries to get her attention,
Like Tanya doing that with a cute lifeguard boy. This
is like when Glenn Powell was on the Morning Show
and we had a whole scheme concocted that one will
pretend her microphone doesn't work so she has to share
his or his didn't work, so she had to hear
(02:29):
whatever to try to get them both on the same microphone.
It's the same concept. It's a damsel in distress. Yeah,
we um. We went and we saw a Top Gun
Maverick and I was telling Robbie about how I'm friends
with Glennon. He's like, how are you friends with this guy?
And I was like, funny you ask because it all
started out with UM listeners thinking he'd be a good
(02:50):
match for me. So I told him the whole story
and he was like, you faked that your microphone. I
was like, Tubs was involved with it. Everybody was like
involved with this, so we had to share chair with me.
It didn't work out, but we are. We became fast friends.
He's great in Top Gun Man. He's really good. You
remind me of Matthew McConaughey and that movie. Yeah, but
(03:13):
I'm like, we're trying to get him on the podcast
because I just love him. We're trying, We're trying, but
you know what, we will wait for Glen Powell, because
you know, things come to those who wait. That's so true.
Good thing good, so far, A little higher. I have
mixed emotions about the water park because I missed my
(03:35):
family and they're all having a great time and be
fun to be with them. But also, water parks are
kind of gross. That's kind of where I am and
I think they are. It's not it's a feat thing
for me. It's a lot of bare feet sharing the
same areas. There's also something about like like the not
(03:55):
knowing if these people have showered recently, but then but
they're already in the water, so it's fine. No, they're germs,
They're no, their germs are just scattering amongst us. This
makes no sense because the oceans are just as dirty.
This is Tanya. I'm gonna warn you before we get
into this debate that you're not gonna win this one.
(04:18):
They're just a dirty and there's no chlorine in the oceans.
It's salt. It's so acdic with salt, and it's like cleansing.
And the oceans never standing still. It's not stagnant, it's
always moving, so they're always getting into new water. Yeah,
that's what they're doing at the water parks too, like
they're flushing it out like a giant to I don't
think there's a whole lot of flushing out. I think
they're repurposing it. I also think that UM water parks
(04:42):
are being frowned upon now because I think they're a
waste of water. Well, certainly in southern California. I don't
know how you justify having a water park unless they
have some sort of plan for, you know, using reclaimed
water or something. But here they have no problem with water.
In Wisconsin. Yeah, there's no water shortage in Wisconsin, plenty
of it. Yeah, the fee thing really resonates with me, Mark,
I really appreciate you bringing that up, because there's just
(05:04):
like it's like a rubber matt and that guy over
there had his bear feet on it, and now I
have my bear feet on it and it's all bad.
And also like other parts of the body. I don't know. Yeah,
a big potential for swimming in urine at the water
think about absolutely, you haven't swam in a little urine.
(05:25):
Does Tanya have a Raging Water's endorsement? We don't know
if Kanya has a deal with Hurricane Harbor exactly. Alright,
So Tanya, maybe maybe UM, you and Robbie and the
kids can go to a water report summer bucket list,
(05:47):
but I think we could squeeze in it. When was
the last time you went to a water park long time? Yeah,
a long time, so I don't know. I'd also because
it's the same feeling for me as getting in a
pool in Vegas. I'm just not doing it. And I've
been really hot and drunk and had to like stumble.
(06:08):
I like, I hate, I hate to even say stumbled.
I slithered into the pool because I thought I was
going to pass out. I literally got so hot and tipsy.
I only had one drink, but I thought I was
gonna have fat. So it was like so crowded you
could barely even find a spot to stand, and I
like slithered into the pool. Speaking of drinking, Oh you're
(06:31):
never doing it. We've heard this before. Yeah, I can't
do it anymore. My body is shutting down on me.
I just had a rager of a week. I feel
like it was I just had birthday after birthday after birthday,
and it was a lot, and so I realized I
need to detox. So I quitting drinking. How long do
(06:52):
you think I'm gonna last? Um? I bet Friday, you'll
drink again. Okay, yeah, I'll give you till Friday. All right,
I'm sorry, I'll give you till Thursday. I was gonna
say Talco tuesdays tomorrow, but you said you weren't going
to drink that I was. I think you can last
at least a day and a half. Okay, I'm giving
you enough credit that I think you can go a
day and app I had the opposite this week where
(07:16):
I drank Tuesday through I didn't drink lass night Tuesday
through Saturday. I went out to like dinners and stuff,
and I drank every night and I didn't feel hungover
one time. So I don't know if I I also
ate so much carbs this week that maybe I was
just like really balancing it out. I felt great. I
(07:38):
was like, man, oh, I feel the opposite. I feel
like a slug. I feel um uh, you know, like
um uh. You know. I can't really describe them, but
you know, like if beer goggles on. I've never warned them,
but I know what it's like to feel like I
was like film. I feel like there's like al of
(08:00):
like film, not in my actual eyes, but just like
in my life right now because of the hungover nous.
So as a non drinker, This may be a silly suggestion,
but wouldn't it make more sense rather than going cold
turkey for I don't know, three days or something, to
just decided to drink in moderation moving forward. So it's
not that when I really it's like I don't have
(08:21):
I don't know, I don't I can go a day
without drinking. It's when i'm social, And it's so interesting.
I was talking to this woman who was pregnant over
the weekend and she was like, I didn't realize how
much I drank until I got pregnant, because she's like,
you just do it at social functions, so like you
can have a glass of wine and another glass of
wine they started at six o'clock, beer outtil ten, Like
it just adds up. You don't like, I don't intentionally
(08:44):
getting like wasted, I except on Saturday night I got
really wasted. Would not just be intentionally moderate about it? Yeah?
And then stop right? Yeah, I think that's what I did.
I think I I never felt Saturday was the only
night where I was like, like kind of remember feeling
like but every other night I just like felt good,
(09:05):
I felt fun. But even one two glasses of wine
makes me feel bad the next day. Well that's a
tolerance issue. It's not like aside from Saturday. It wasn't
like I was popping back, you know, shots and stuff.
I would. I just what I've gathered about myself as
I'd much rather take an edible than drink. It's way
(09:28):
more fun. I'm relaxed. I don't have any like I
don't feel bad at all the next day. Yeah, maybe
I'll try that someday. Please please let me be with you.
I gotta chance. I gotta figure. Yeah, I gotta figure.
I gotta figure something out because I'm I'm just a
little a little sluggish. But I will say so on
(09:50):
what day? Uh so whatever, I guess a Saturday. Saturday
was Selena's thirtieth birthday party. And I haven't seen some
of these people in like pre pandemic, so you know
me not Tania like in her Tania mode. I was
just having this like reaction. Yes, and for Robbie do know,
(10:11):
but I mean he knew, like obviously are close friends
that were there. But I was just like having this
I was having like a you know when you're so
excited and you're like so high on LFE that you
just want to keep like I don't know, I just
was so wanting to keep going and going and going,
and then I was just so drunk. You know, Robbie
is really good for you in that way that like
he can hold his own because when you get excited
(10:32):
and you see people, you don't forget about the people
you're with, but you put so much. You know, this
is my first impression of you. So I've been on
both sides of the coin, but I feel like he's
good in the sense like he can hold his own
and like he could talk to literally a pole in
the middle. Like I saw this guy, um, one of
(10:53):
my friends Jordan, who I haven't seen in years, and
I've known this guy since we were back at the
days because he's one of Jason Kennedy's best friends. And
I was like, oh my gosh, I'm talking and Robbie
just comes right on it and he's like, whoa, what
do you you know? Like where are you from? What
do you do? Like how do you guys know each other?
And then then they're having their own private little conversation.
I was like, all right, I'll go over here and
you know, say how to my other friend. You know,
I know it's this is casual for you and you
(11:14):
do things like this all the time. But going to
something like I know, there's not like I don't I
don't even know what you can or will talk about.
But going to Selena Gomez is thirtieth birthday party is
a pretty big deal. That's not everyday thing that Like
the way her and her friends were talking about it
at her birthday dinner, They're like, you know, um on
Cells Cells party on Saturday. I know. I was like,
(11:38):
who's the sell person I haven't met? And then I realized, oh,
Selena Gomez, so that's a big deal, is a big deal,
and then it was like a big party. It was
a bash. It was it was a birthday bash. Remember
enjoying her on season two of Only Murders in the Building. Yeah,
(12:01):
it's so I'm this. So we are. We haven't finished
season one yet, but we're in the thick of season one.
I think we're on episode nine and we're really really
loving it people. It's very it's it's very light. You know,
when you get when you finish a stranger Things or
a berry or something like that, you can really cleanse
the palette with some Only Murder. Yeah, but it's like
a murder mystery. But it's like, um, I actually told
(12:22):
her that we were we were watching it, and she's
I guess, um, what did she said? It's like cotton
candy murderer mystery or something like that. Yeah, I like
that candy murder because it still has that murder mystery aspect,
which I don't even likely. I'm not a big you know,
murder mystery gal, but I'm really really liking it. I
(12:45):
find you're so charming and cute on the show about
And it's a crime that she wasn't nominated for an
Emmy and Stephen Martin were nominated for Emmy's. That is
bullcrap criminal. Yeah with they both were, right, Stephen Martin,
what happened? I cannot speak for the Academy. Let's start
(13:07):
a petition like that's messed up. I would also you
know who else? And I've only seen clips of this
because I've ben't watching in a long time, but the
fact that Mandy Moore didn't get an Emmy for this
is us Like have you seen the clips of bread?
She's she's amazing and she has been on that show
from the beginning, and she played three different generations of
the same more than that, but definitely teenager mom and grandma. Yeah, yeah,
(13:33):
that's that's not easy to pull off playing one character
as a teenager and as a grandmother. But we got
to talk to these Emmy's people. I gotta call up
these Emmy's people. Will start with Selena, then we'll do
Mandy next. Okay, yeah, but that yeah, like, what the heck,
what the heck? What the heck? Justice for Selena Gomez
(13:54):
is Emmy Yeah, justice for all the Emmy's that should
have been, I mean, nominations that should have been. Okay.
(14:18):
So the other day, I see that Chelsea Handler is
on Glennon Doyle's podcast and they just posted a clip
and let me Glenn and Doyle on this podcast, Glennon
and Abbey Like, I want both of Abby Wambach and
Glenn and Oyle. They're amazing. Anyways, Chelsea, Glenn and says
how are you doing? And Chelsea goes to answer and
(14:41):
she like her voice cracks, and you know, we're like,
we're I feel like all of us are not used
to seeing Chelsea have like emotion and being like soft
and vulnerable. But I felt like her relationship with Joe
coy like really like softened her. And so she starts saying,
She's like, I'm okay, Like I think I'm doing okay.
(15:02):
I'm he like that he blew my basically, like he
opened my heart to love like I've never experienced. So
I text Tanya and I'm like, I don't know much
about them, but I'm sad because she seems so happy
and like so in love. And I was thinking, you
know of people who I mean even I for some
reason thought about Tanya and how like when she fell
(15:25):
in love with Robbie and that love story and then
like to hear it it ended, I was like devastated
emotional attachment to this Jelsea Handler. Really, I'm like, who
are you who hardened your heart? You don't believe in
true love like this? And to be honest, I wasn't
(15:47):
like a big stand of their relationship, like I love
I liked him because she liked him so much, but
I never loved him. Well, I don't know. I just
know them as like a couple. I don't know anything
about him separate from her exactly. So what is it about?
(16:07):
That's the thing. I just that's the thing I think
she needs to be with somebody that's like a partner
to her, Oh, you didn't feel like he was a partner.
I didn't feel that he felt like she was. It
was a one sided romance. No, not one sided. I
think they obviously both were in love, but like, all
I'm saying is they just felt like he wasn't her
(16:29):
partner if you know what i mean, like a partner
in life. You know what I mean. Because he's younger. No, yeah,
I just need a little clarity because he's not a partner.
But he's not. He's a partner, but he's not a partner. No,
Like I'm saying, because you said you don't feel like
(16:50):
they love each other, it was a one side of relationship. No,
I don't think it was one sided. But I just
don't feel like he was a good partner. You can
say it's only and deliberately as you want. It's not
going to help us understand what you're saying. But she
posted this really sweet message basically announcing their breakup, but
also being like we love each other so much, like
(17:10):
he has a new movie coming out, like go support him,
and I'm just like want not her peer is that
he's not like at her level no, because I don't
think you need to be on someone's level. He's just
not like a partner. For some reason, I thought he
was younger than her. He is like five years older
(17:31):
than Chelsea, So I'm sorry, Oh yeah, I was like,
I don't I don't know his age. Yeah, but like
what it comes down to is he's just not a partner,
partner partner, Okay, all right, now Chelsea back on and
see if she agrees, like like a partner, you know,
(17:51):
a partner helps you when you're down, A partner helps you.
Probably these things. I don't know. I just had a feeling.
I know you. So we're facing this whole breakup and
you having like not being connected to it on the
fact that you think that he did not. That's what
celebrity culture is. None of us know any of these people,
(18:14):
and we just have these like you don't know that
he's had strong opinions, Like, look, I was team Jolsey
from the beginning. I was all in on that relationship.
But you, uh, like when Jeffin and Selena broke up
for the first time, you were horrified by that, and
that was like, I don't know if that was before
you guys are friends or whatever I think it was.
But I just remember you being the only one that
was surprised. Most of the times when celebrities breakup, you're
(18:35):
the one that takes it hard, where everybody else was
like yeah, figured yeah. But for some reason, like because
I just felt like they were never partnered. Got it
just to clear the air. Nothing's been cleared In case
you guys were wondering. I just was never Yeah. It
was just like not partnership. I just know. I just
(18:56):
know one that have taught me had a conversation with him,
she would be like, I changed my mind. He is amazing.
That's true. Maybe I didn't know enough. Maybe I didn't
know enough about him, that's truesting Okay, okay, I didn't
know much about him. He was the first celebrity I
ever met working in radio. He was performing at the
(19:17):
San Jose Improv in two thousand and nine and he
came by KSCO Radio and Santa Crista dude interview came
in studio. It's not a not a short drive, and
he was so cool and we talked about Jordan's and
he was the nicest guy in the world to a
bread eye and bushy tail. Easton Allen. So therefore, Joe
Cole and I are close friends and I was always
excited for him to get to I enter this relationship,
(19:38):
and I'm sad to see it ends. Right, he's a partner.
I try. I trust Easton in this one's the partner.
But oh, you know what else was really devastating, Like
you talk about Selena and Justin Brad Pitton, Jennifer Anderson
is like such a vivid memory in my lifetime of
(20:01):
not breakup. Becca's biggest thing was if you see jen
Anison Selena's birthday, I have envy, like I don't, and
she was just like, going on, I didn't. I texted it,
and that's not the tone I was saying it, but
those are the words I use. I was just like,
at first I saw Taylor Swish posted or someone posted
a photo of Taylor Slifton Selena celebrating her thirtieth and
(20:24):
I was like, Tanya, Taylor's there tomorrow, like you know,
we need stories, and She's like, I don't think she's coming,
Like that's why they went to dinner tonight, and I
was like cool, And then I started remembering that like
Jennifer Anderson Selena somehow connected. There's like a connection there,
and I was like, Jennifer Aiston, I feel like, all
of a sudden, I'm jealous about this party because like
(20:46):
what if Jennifer Anderson's there? And she was like, oh,
I don't know she's gonna be there or whatever. But
I was like, I have envy because like I don't
get a ton of fomo or like jealousy. I mean,
I just I think it's That's why I think it's
cool that Tanya goes to you saying, but I feel
like intimidated by like that party level scares me a
little bit, but I was like it diferated. Is there
(21:08):
a movie so jealous? My whole point of the Jinn
Paradis the thing was to bring up how bleep and
good Brad Pitt looked on the press tour for his
new movie. I think it's called Bullet Train. Trailer looks
really good. Have you seen the pics? Uh No? The
man has aged like the finest of wine. But you
(21:33):
like him. I love him even though he screwed a
jen for over. It's complicated. I think they've healed their relationships,
so I think I get to feel this way again,
all right, fair. Yeah, but do you like to Angelina Jolie? Okay, alright,
alright forever. I hate that because I feel like a
lot of people were like, I hate Angelina Jolie and
(21:55):
I'm like, but you still like Brad Pitt. Oh No,
I actually like all three of them. It was my girl,
my god, and then I mean not my god, but like,
my god, he's so hot. I was not really confusing.
And then Angeline is just like a stunning human and
it seems to be a good person. Yeah. So Jennifer
was not at the party. No, Jennifer was not there,
(22:16):
but I did spend a lot of time with Becky
g who is just the cutes literally the nicest thing ever.
She is really sweet. Yeah, um, yeah, she's the cutest thing.
There were some big names there. I'm not saying like
it wasn't star studded. It's just the people who I
felt jealous over, the Jennifer Anderson's of the world exactly. Yeah,
(22:38):
she was not there, but I am trying to get
her manager on the podcast because I'm obsessed with her.
I would love that. She's like so so badass. She's
literally like modern woman energy. I heard her speak, Um,
Selena did something for International Women's Day for Rare Beauty,
did like an event and Eleen was her manager, spoke
(22:59):
at it and I literally pulled out my phone and
was taking notes because she was just so inspiring and
like not trying to be inspiring, just like telling stories
about being a woman in the industry. And it was
so moving and so powerful, do you know what I mean?
Like you know some people, you know, like they're getting
to it like a crescendo and they're making a point
and they you know, that was not her. She was
(23:20):
just literally like talking about stories and sharing her insights,
and I was just like, I'm obsessed with you. The
memory I have Eileen. Tanya was following her around the
whole party, being like, Elan, we have to get a
photo together, and she's like, Tanya, I really don't feel
like we'll do it another time. I don't feel like cute.
(23:43):
I don't want to do it, Tanya. Multiple times I
heard Tanya trying to convince her to take a photo.
I was like, Tanya, she doesn't want to take a photo. Yeah, okay,
But I was trying to get her on the podcast,
which I think she will. Well, you know what's sad
is that these days, like your gift, they're giving a
speech and the audience is watching. There's no difference in
(24:06):
whow this speech is so inspiring? I have to take
notes in my phone and I'm so bored. I'm texting
my friends like if people are so into it or
if they're just bored? Because if I were up there
on stage and that's how people on their phones, I'm like,
well I lost them. You know what's interesting. I think
she knew because I was raising my hand and like
asking questions. I wasn't like, you know, sure raising your
(24:28):
hand and yes I was, Yes I was. I'm with you, Mark.
I never thought about that. I would also think the
same thing. But also I do. I guess you have
to get people. Yeah, but church like everyone. I mean,
I guess the church is another good example. I think
people would be annoyed by someone texting, or so they think,
(24:51):
but now you have by the Bible app on your
phone offense. If you see someone like a notepad like this, like,
oh my god, they're take notes. I used to do
a lot of doodling on my in my church days,
in my youth, on the envelopes for the offering um
(25:13):
but I was gonna say something about Oh I saw
it was an old concert and it was a Google
Dolls and it was like this really cool one in
the rein of them singing Iris. I was obsessed with
the Google Dolls. Yeah, they were like iconic. Why were
you watching? As it was a TikTok and it was
(25:34):
like I just go and watch old concerts for they
were performing. The Google Dolls performed on Live with Kelly
and Ryan one day when I was there, and I
was like, it's taking everything in me not to go
up to this guy and say that I'm like wildly
obsessed with you. But the video it's pouring rain, they're
on stage singing Iris and it pants to the crowd
(25:57):
and not I mean there were no phone, there were
no cell phones, and everyone's like zoned in dancing, passionately singing,
And I was like, man, I know that like having
a phone, there's a great a lot of great things,
but wow, like we were so desensitized to just being
black balloon is black balloon makes sir fly? It was
(26:21):
like underrated in my opinion, yes, well not underrated. I
think they had their time. I don't think they had
the time. They deserved. Yeah, they had a song on
the chart like two years ago. Oh I don't think
they get cold Play and trade and somebody. Yeah, man
Goo dolls were my Oh man, have you ever been
(26:42):
to a cold Play concert? Yes, that's on my bucket list.
Many envy, there's the envy again, Envy. They did a
really intimate eyheart performance when you're at Oh No, I
want like a stadium where I can see all the
phone like they did. Um. I remember it was they
did the Rose Bowl and it was Alessia Carra was
opening for them, and I went with Alessia Carra's team,
(27:05):
so I have to go backstage, and I was watching
like Chris Martin playing like Hacky Sack back there and
like just being so cool with every person I was
working backstage. I was just like this guy Tony doesn't
even know what she's yeah and no, no, I knew that.
I was like, did Chris Martin Just He's just like
kicking it with people right now backstage. It's like early,
(27:27):
like he probably need to be at the venue at
that point. Wow. He got emotional recently at a concert,
like they were seeing sky full of stars and he
had to stop singing, like he just left the crowd
singing because he got emotional. God, I love him so much.
I love him. It comes in and he's so nice
to everybody that you feel like, is it I must
an act, But then it's clear it's not. It's not.
(27:48):
I just just and it's like so genuine. That's that's amazing,
because at his level he could be He honestly could
be horrible. He guess American top fort you last year,
and he like, was so nice, and then halfway through
he stopped. He's like, Eastern, I just want you to know.
This script is brilliant. This is these jokes are so funny,
and I was like, oh my god, I listen to
(28:10):
that clip over and over. He's the best. If you
ever need a boost, a morale boost frequent um. Speaking
of the holding up your phone light, I got to
explain to my kids the other day of what we
used to do before we had phones and the lighter
out there. They were very surprised that that many people
had lighters at a concert, like, why, well, there's plenty
(28:31):
of smoking back then, and that's the only reason I
can think of. Yeah, that is fascinating though, like that
that many people smoked yeah, if you had a twenty
people concert, there were twenty thousand lighters out there, which
seems dangerous, I was gonna say, And also that they
were just allowed. Is that Can you still bring lighters
into a venue? Know? I think so? I don't know.
(28:53):
Oh crazy, Okay, I don't think we've taken a single break.
So we're gonna take a break and right back, like
when the flow is slow and he's got to go
with the flow. All right, we're back and we have
(29:20):
some emails, so Mark take it away from the basement,
all right, Becka, thank you very much. Apologies for the
hum in the background. That's a water heater. Here we
go from anonymous. I have a cousin that I'm super
close with. He has a girlfriend and he has had
her since January. And this girlfriend has a five year
old son. We see them every single time we go
over there. She's very sweet. He's really into her, and
(29:41):
he told me he wants to ask her and her
son to move in with him. Here's the dilemma. I
also recently found out from a friend who bartends that
he knows her and that she has an only fans account.
He showed me your page and said, he knows people
that subscribe to it. She's been doing it for about
a year, very active on the account, uses a fake name,
and films herself having sex with other men. Wow, only fans.
(30:06):
I know for a fact what I know for a fact.
My cousin would not be okay with this. He has
no clue and wants to ask you to move in.
I'm looking for advice. I can't bring myself to tell him.
I even have a friendship with her and sometimes we
text and make plans to hang out. How do I
look at her now? I'm so uncomfortable. Help give me
some guidance. Thank you. She has to tell the girl
(30:28):
that she saw her account and that I think. I
think that's the way to do it too. Yeah. I
think you take her aside and say, look, I do
you know this bartender Guss. Yeah, I met Gus and uh,
he showed me your account. And I know that cousin
is not going to be happy with this. I think
you got to tell him, because if you don't, I will. Yeah,
but then what does she do If she doesn't tell him,
(30:50):
then you gotta tell your cousin. You can't let him
walk into this trap like it's like you do you girl,
like get get, get the money, do what you gotta do.
But you gotta be upfront about what you're doing because
there's someone like someone that I love involved, and I
just know that knowing him, we're really close, I know
he wouldn't be okay with this, So I wanted to
(31:11):
come to you first. Make it seem like you're just
like like you're not trying to go against her, You're
just you're you're looking out for your cousin who you love. Yeah,
I mean that is still cheating on him. If you're
having sex with other men, even if it's not only fans,
that is cheating and dangerous. You're right. I sorry, in
my mind, I was thinking only fans being more like photos,
(31:34):
she's cheating on him. So I think it's like there's
not there's not many jobs where like you can get
clamydia from another person, park if you kept that a secret,
that would be a bad sign. Yeah, yeah, I think
I agree that. I think going to her first and
giving her the chance, and then if she doesn't, then
(31:56):
I do. I mean, I would look out for your
cousin because it's already it's already not great that this
is happening and he doesn't know, so I would do
it as soon as possible. Yeah, I mean having like
having an only fans account would not bother me, honestly,
but he still should know about that. Even you wouldn't
(32:19):
care if Robbie hood of only fans account, well yeah
if yeah, I would care, but I would less care
if he was not having sex with people. I think
you would care all around, but I don't know. The
sex really throws it to another level because you're cheating, right.
I didn't know only fans with that graphic. I also
(32:40):
didn't I didn't know that either. So if Robbie had
an only fans and all he would doing was kind
of a puppet show with his genitalia, that's it, a
puppet show, something from any sort of reality that like,
I can't even put myself in the situation. That's good though,
(33:00):
Eastern he's cutting fish nude. As someone who knows what
triggers your jealousy, I can guarantee you'd not be okay.
You would not be okay with any of it. Yeah,
it would. It would stress me out for sure, But
I'm saying I probably wouldn't like break up with him
over it. But then again, if it's been years and
(33:21):
I didn't know, that's like super slot. No. Yeah, if
he didn't tell you, that's that's the betrayal. That yeah, yeah, alright, man,
that's stuff. This is from Shaney. Shaney says, my wife
and I haven't married for six years, and together for eight.
We spent a healthy amount of time apart trips with friends,
work retreats, so forth. However, I may be traveling for
work starting next year in Israel or Ireland. I live
(33:44):
in Portland, Oregon for up to a year. I'll be
able to come home every once in a while, and
she'll be able to visit me. But I know Becca
has experience in long distance and time apart from Hailey
when she's on tour. I'm very secure in my relationship
and there are no trust issues or anything like that.
I'm just worried about being homesick and being about being homesick, sorry, homesick,
and being away from her and the dogs for so long.
(34:05):
We have two huskies named Elvis and Fox, and do
you have any advice on what I can do to
make it a little easier. Those are both Harry Potter references.
By the way, those dogs oh, I've never seen or
read Harry Potter, but that's a that's a red flag
for for Haley and for me honestly. Um. I actually
(34:27):
so when Haley and I first started dating, she basically
immediately went on tour. So that was their first year
of our relationship basically, and we didn't know anything else.
So that first year was pretty I mean, it was hard,
but we just adjusted to it because there was no
other option, and I would go out and visit when
I could. Um. But Haley is actually about to leave
(34:48):
on tour again in August for eight weeks. It's gonna
be so different because like we had the whole pandemic together.
We've spent so much time together and she's gonna be
gone and I obviously I'm the same way. I'm very
secure in our relationship. I trust her. It's more about
me feeling alone, you know, and being by myself and
(35:09):
her not being there and like our normal routine. But
we've like just made made it clear of like making
sure that we have a time at some point to
at least FaceTime or talk on the phone at some
point during the day. I mean, being in a different
country makes it way harder because I remember when she
was in Europe, like that was really challenging finding times
that worked for both of us to talk. But um,
(35:32):
that was the one thing. Was like making sure we
have time to like catch up on our day that
feels like something that we normally do, and then like
once a week checking in, like you know, like something
we appreciate about each other, you know, just like validating
and making sure that both feelings are heard and needs
are hurt. Because even I'm like I always sall Haley,
(35:54):
like I don't need a ton of attention in the
sense of like phone calls and facetimes, but just like
a text here and they're like, hey, thinking about you,
just so in the middle of her routine and like
work schedule, knowing that she's thinking about me. Because we've
been together for four years, so it'll be different compared
to like our first year together. Crazy, but like our
(36:14):
first year together, we were like so obsessed, like we
were just like waiting for the text like any time
we could get it. And obviously I'll be more that
way when she's gone, but um, I just told her, like,
you know, I'll communicate what I need as I need it,
But I'm not like I'm not unrealistic. So I think
it's just figuring out times to talk and like catch
up on your day and have face times and maybe
(36:37):
some like letters that's cute and romance or postcards, nudes,
nudes like whatever you need, but don't make anybody's day,
you know, like they do. And I'm going to travel
a lot. I think I'm just gonna like try and
(36:58):
pack my schedule. And I'm also going to go on
tour for like different stuffs. So it is a weird thing.
I was actually having. I don't know if I was
having this conversation with you, but I was having with
one of my friends, and I was like when I
was in my single dumb of those years of just
like super single, I was sleeping home by myself every night,
like thriving, like fine, you know, I don't need anybody
(37:20):
to sleep without my vibrator, like chilling. Now that I'm
in my relationship, like I don't want to spend a
night away from him, like I don't ever, like I
don't can't tell you the last time I spent the
night don't without him, but I can't, Like I'm like
people that are married for however many years, like that's
such a crazy because you get so used to it,
(37:42):
Like I'm just so used to having him, and I've
never had that before, you know what I mean. It's
like a weird thing to think about. That happened in
a matter of like a year and a half. I think, oh, yeah,
it's struggle, real bad. But wait, this is so funny
because like, for a long time, I'm Tanya only sought
(38:02):
out men that were like distance, like there was like
some sort of protection this guy, another New York guy.
But like thinking about your relationship with Robbie, Like if
if you felt that way about any of these guys,
that would have never worked. I know, but I think, Okay,
So when I was doing calling in the one, I
realized that was my pattern. I was going for men
(38:24):
that were like either emotionally or physically unavailable so I
couldn't attach myself to them, so that I couldn't get hurt.
I get it. I mean, I think a lot of
people probably do that without even realizing they do it.
It's very like psychologically. I also think there's podcast episodes
where I talked about like wanting to have separate beds
from the person I ended up with, Like I was like,
(38:46):
I love sleeping alone, Like I can't imagine like always
having someone, like like getting used to sleeping with someone
in the bed with my back. I was like, like
another body and now I know. Well, we were saying
before the podcast, like there's I was saying, how there
was this guy that he's now married with a child
and he had d M me like way before he
(39:09):
met his wife. But I was and we were just laughing,
saying like how funny it is now he's married with
the baby and all the other things that have changed
since that time. And I was like, oh my gosh,
probably half of Los Angeles has d MS from me,
at least at least half of l Anny Beck. I
saw a hot guy in Trader Joe's. I only saw
(39:30):
his profile, but I noticed he had an earring and
he had a slight facial hair. He's probably about five tin.
Let's try and find him. You had nikes on I did,
and sometimes I found them. We did. We Yeah, there
was some good investigation. Well did I give any good
advice on that? Yes, I think you did. I don't
(39:52):
feel any dad to it. I have nothing to add
to it, because I would be horrible. Yeah, I hope
you never have to go through up. Yeah. It sucks,
it really does. And I will be honest. When Haley
went to she went to like Europe and Portugal recently,
and I was not. It wasn't like my best portrayal
(40:14):
of myself, you know, because it was our first time
basically since before the pandemic, that we had been long
distance for that amount of time, and she was the
time difference was challenging for me. Struggled because like in
the beginning of our relationship, I only spent half of
my nights with him because I didn't meet the kids,
(40:34):
you know, I didn't meet his kids until a year
in and so I was kind of used to like
the fifty fifty of it, like I didn't sleep with
him every night. I slept with him some nights, um,
and then once I met the kids and was around
when I was around them more, now I just, um,
I always sleep there. But it it's so crazy, how
like now I can't even I can't imagine it. I
(40:54):
remember actually when you were fifty fifty that you would say,
like you still slept really well in your bed by yourself. Yeah,
I was like totally fine. And now if I had
I would be like, it's like a full We gotta
like really take care of Tanya if she ever has
to sleep alone at her apartment. Tragic, tragic, truly, Okay, Tanya,
(41:15):
we gotta address first of all, we gotta get you
back in the Facebook scrubbing. You know, I just keep
trying to tell me to double authenticate myself and I'm
just like, oh my gosh, I can't. Anyway, I didn't
share what a scrubber has done, and no problem because
a lot of people dammed it to me. That's that's
how I saw it. Um. But her name's Jenna, and
we were talking about j Lo's newsletter on the podcast
(41:37):
last week and I was like, should I get a newsletter?
She literally mocked up a Tanya newsletter that was really cute.
The Tanya Times, how to start Living Sunny, woke Up,
cute butterfly sightings this week felt be significant. I mean
notable stories this week, how to get hands, like Robbie
(41:57):
getting through, getting through a phase of songs, have your
own Taco Tuesday. I mean, this is high. What's her name?
I'm going to hire her as a graphic designer. It's
so cute and like her drawing of Sunny is like perfect, perfect,
I mean she was a model, Jenna. Is it door
door on? Dorian? I don't know. We're on the run, Jenna.
(42:21):
I'm reaching out to you because you are so talented,
so talented, and it's so cute, and it made me
kind of want to do a newsletter, you know what.
It made me want for you to get back into
the scrubbing anger. I know, I'm going to try because
I think so I had like scan something. I think
if I have my computer and my phone, I can
figure it out who kicked out of Facebook. I was
talking to Crystal and I was saying, like, we I'm
(42:43):
gonna start. I'm gonna make a scrubbing in TikTok and
like upload you know, the clips and stuff that she
puts together, and then also just like you know, weird
or funny things Tanya and I do. Once she starts
doing TikTok's with me soon and she was like, you know,
I'm so protective because TikTok, like it goes out to
so many people that aren't even maybe listeners of the
(43:04):
podcast or no our personalities or who we are. And
she's like, I just don't want them to be mean,
and I was like, yeah, I get that. I was like,
but at least if they're not listeners or they're like
stranger danger to us and don't know us, it doesn't
sting as bad as it does when someone who's like
a scrubber and like knows our personality says something. You
(43:26):
agree hmmm. I don't know about that, do you? But no,
that will bear bring it on to calm itself. Just
leave it. No, I have a shield. I have a
force shield. Okay, she has a for shield, so I
think three five. I can't get past this. That's right,
(43:46):
And shout out to Alison, who had a birthday yesterday's
Happy birthday, Alison Allen. Such a cute a literally alliteration name.
That's why she married me. She wanted the name. Yes,
she always she always says that, thank you very much.
That will be very special when she listens to this
um later in the month. All Right, I hope you
(44:12):
all have a great week. We'll be back Thursday with
Karen Fox, so check that out. And we love you,
love you bye.
Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya Red and I
Heart radio podcast. Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in. We
are scrubbing in. It is a Monday, and um you know,
I told Becca I had a very frantic, uh morning,
(00:21):
and I decided that I'm going to switch it around
today right now, and it's not gonna be frantic. It's
gonna be pleasant and we're gonna have fun on the podcast.
That's right, that's right, that's right. You know what they say,
you know what they say, what goes down must come up.
And you may have heard in your life what goes
up must come down, But Tanya says today today what
(00:44):
is down must come up correct And that has many
different connotations depending on where your mind is that today.
Oh you mean, like a wiener, when it goes down,
it can always come back up. God willing um Mark
(01:05):
is in a what looks to be a garage or basement.
It's hard to say it's a basement. It's my father
in law's work bench. I am in Franklin, Wisconsin with
the family, although the family has abandoned me. They're up
in the Wisconsin Dells at a water park. The biggest
water park in North America. It's called Noah's Ark. Stuck
in this basement working this week. Is it really called
(01:27):
Noah's Ark? Yeah? Is it? Is it religious based or
it's what happened if we didn't escape on the arc,
like you endure the flood at this water park? Water
parks I have Like when I was a young, water
park was like the ultimate destination. I couldn't think of
anything I'd rather do than go to a water park.
(01:47):
But as an adult, I have I have changed from that?
Did you are you kidding me? I thrived at water park?
I would like count my lucky stars if I go.
I loved water parks. Were you just trape thing around,
like flirting with boys, flopping around? Did you like fake
a drowning or something? But like the wave pools, like
(02:07):
where everything went down? Do you all picture Tanya kind
of like in the sand lot the guy who like
sees the lifeguard and and tries to get her attention,
Like Tanya doing that with a cute lifeguard boy. This
is like when Glenn Powell was on the Morning Show
and we had a whole scheme concocted that one will
pretend her microphone doesn't work so she has to share
his or his didn't work, so she had to hear
(02:29):
whatever to try to get them both on the same microphone.
It's the same concept. It's a damsel in distress. Yeah,
we um. We went and we saw a Top Gun
Maverick and I was telling Robbie about how I'm friends
with Glennon. He's like, how are you friends with this guy?
And I was like, funny you ask because it all
started out with UM listeners thinking he'd be a good
(02:50):
match for me. So I told him the whole story
and he was like, you faked that your microphone. I
was like, Tubs was involved with it. Everybody was like
involved with this, so we had to share chair with me.
It didn't work out, but we are. We became fast friends.
He's great in Top Gun Man. He's really good. You
remind me of Matthew McConaughey and that movie. Yeah, but
(03:13):
I'm like, we're trying to get him on the podcast
because I just love him. We're trying, We're trying, but
you know what, we will wait for Glen Powell, because
you know, things come to those who wait. That's so true.
Good thing good, so far, A little higher. I have
mixed emotions about the water park because I missed my
(03:35):
family and they're all having a great time and be
fun to be with them. But also, water parks are
kind of gross. That's kind of where I am and
I think they are. It's not it's a feat thing
for me. It's a lot of bare feet sharing the
same areas. There's also something about like like the not
(03:55):
knowing if these people have showered recently, but then but
they're already in the water, so it's fine. No, they're germs,
They're no, their germs are just scattering amongst us. This
makes no sense because the oceans are just as dirty.
This is Tanya. I'm gonna warn you before we get
into this debate that you're not gonna win this one.
(04:18):
They're just a dirty and there's no chlorine in the oceans.
It's salt. It's so acdic with salt, and it's like cleansing.
And the oceans never standing still. It's not stagnant, it's
always moving, so they're always getting into new water. Yeah,
that's what they're doing at the water parks too, like
they're flushing it out like a giant to I don't
think there's a whole lot of flushing out. I think
they're repurposing it. I also think that UM water parks
(04:42):
are being frowned upon now because I think they're a
waste of water. Well, certainly in southern California. I don't
know how you justify having a water park unless they
have some sort of plan for, you know, using reclaimed
water or something. But here they have no problem with water.
In Wisconsin. Yeah, there's no water shortage in Wisconsin, plenty
of it. Yeah, the fee thing really resonates with me, Mark,
I really appreciate you bringing that up, because there's just
(05:04):
like it's like a rubber matt and that guy over
there had his bear feet on it, and now I
have my bear feet on it and it's all bad.
And also like other parts of the body. I don't know. Yeah,
a big potential for swimming in urine at the water
think about absolutely, you haven't swam in a little urine.
(05:25):
Does Tanya have a Raging Water's endorsement? We don't know
if Kanya has a deal with Hurricane Harbor exactly. Alright,
So Tanya, maybe maybe UM, you and Robbie and the
kids can go to a water report summer bucket list,
(05:47):
but I think we could squeeze in it. When was
the last time you went to a water park long time? Yeah,
a long time, so I don't know. I'd also because
it's the same feeling for me as getting in a
pool in Vegas. I'm just not doing it. And I've
been really hot and drunk and had to like stumble.
(06:08):
I like, I hate, I hate to even say stumbled.
I slithered into the pool because I thought I was
going to pass out. I literally got so hot and tipsy.
I only had one drink, but I thought I was
gonna have fat. So it was like so crowded you
could barely even find a spot to stand, and I
like slithered into the pool. Speaking of drinking, Oh you're
(06:31):
never doing it. We've heard this before. Yeah, I can't
do it anymore. My body is shutting down on me.
I just had a rager of a week. I feel
like it was I just had birthday after birthday after birthday,
and it was a lot, and so I realized I
need to detox. So I quitting drinking. How long do
(06:52):
you think I'm gonna last? Um? I bet Friday, you'll
drink again. Okay, yeah, I'll give you till Friday. All right,
I'm sorry, I'll give you till Thursday. I was gonna
say Talco tuesdays tomorrow, but you said you weren't going
to drink that I was. I think you can last
at least a day and a half. Okay, I'm giving
you enough credit that I think you can go a
day and app I had the opposite this week where
(07:16):
I drank Tuesday through I didn't drink lass night Tuesday
through Saturday. I went out to like dinners and stuff,
and I drank every night and I didn't feel hungover
one time. So I don't know if I I also
ate so much carbs this week that maybe I was
just like really balancing it out. I felt great. I
(07:38):
was like, man, oh, I feel the opposite. I feel
like a slug. I feel um uh, you know, like
um uh. You know. I can't really describe them, but
you know, like if beer goggles on. I've never warned them,
but I know what it's like to feel like I
was like film. I feel like there's like al of
(08:00):
like film, not in my actual eyes, but just like
in my life right now because of the hungover nous.
So as a non drinker, This may be a silly suggestion,
but wouldn't it make more sense rather than going cold
turkey for I don't know, three days or something, to
just decided to drink in moderation moving forward. So it's
not that when I really it's like I don't have
(08:21):
I don't know, I don't I can go a day
without drinking. It's when i'm social, And it's so interesting.
I was talking to this woman who was pregnant over
the weekend and she was like, I didn't realize how
much I drank until I got pregnant, because she's like,
you just do it at social functions, so like you
can have a glass of wine and another glass of
wine they started at six o'clock, beer outtil ten, Like
it just adds up. You don't like, I don't intentionally
(08:44):
getting like wasted, I except on Saturday night I got
really wasted. Would not just be intentionally moderate about it? Yeah?
And then stop right? Yeah, I think that's what I did.
I think I I never felt Saturday was the only
night where I was like, like kind of remember feeling
like but every other night I just like felt good,
(09:05):
I felt fun. But even one two glasses of wine
makes me feel bad the next day. Well that's a
tolerance issue. It's not like aside from Saturday. It wasn't
like I was popping back, you know, shots and stuff.
I would. I just what I've gathered about myself as
I'd much rather take an edible than drink. It's way
(09:28):
more fun. I'm relaxed. I don't have any like I
don't feel bad at all the next day. Yeah, maybe
I'll try that someday. Please please let me be with you.
I gotta chance. I gotta figure. Yeah, I gotta figure.
I gotta figure something out because I'm I'm just a
little a little sluggish. But I will say so on
(09:50):
what day? Uh so whatever, I guess a Saturday. Saturday
was Selena's thirtieth birthday party. And I haven't seen some
of these people in like pre pandemic, so you know
me not Tania like in her Tania mode. I was
just having this like reaction. Yes, and for Robbie do know,
(10:11):
but I mean he knew, like obviously are close friends
that were there. But I was just like having this
I was having like a you know when you're so
excited and you're like so high on LFE that you
just want to keep like I don't know, I just
was so wanting to keep going and going and going,
and then I was just so drunk. You know, Robbie
is really good for you in that way that like
he can hold his own because when you get excited
(10:32):
and you see people, you don't forget about the people
you're with, but you put so much. You know, this
is my first impression of you. So I've been on
both sides of the coin, but I feel like he's
good in the sense like he can hold his own
and like he could talk to literally a pole in
the middle. Like I saw this guy, um, one of
(10:53):
my friends Jordan, who I haven't seen in years, and
I've known this guy since we were back at the
days because he's one of Jason Kennedy's best friends. And
I was like, oh my gosh, I'm talking and Robbie
just comes right on it and he's like, whoa, what
do you you know? Like where are you from? What
do you do? Like how do you guys know each other?
And then then they're having their own private little conversation.
I was like, all right, I'll go over here and
you know, say how to my other friend. You know,
I know it's this is casual for you and you
(11:14):
do things like this all the time. But going to
something like I know, there's not like I don't I
don't even know what you can or will talk about.
But going to Selena Gomez is thirtieth birthday party is
a pretty big deal. That's not everyday thing that Like
the way her and her friends were talking about it
at her birthday dinner, They're like, you know, um on
Cells Cells party on Saturday. I know. I was like,
(11:38):
who's the sell person I haven't met? And then I realized, oh,
Selena Gomez, so that's a big deal, is a big deal,
and then it was like a big party. It was
a bash. It was it was a birthday bash. Remember
enjoying her on season two of Only Murders in the Building. Yeah,
(12:01):
it's so I'm this. So we are. We haven't finished
season one yet, but we're in the thick of season one.
I think we're on episode nine and we're really really
loving it people. It's very it's it's very light. You know,
when you get when you finish a stranger Things or
a berry or something like that, you can really cleanse
the palette with some Only Murder. Yeah, but it's like
a murder mystery. But it's like, um, I actually told
(12:22):
her that we were we were watching it, and she's
I guess, um, what did she said? It's like cotton
candy murderer mystery or something like that. Yeah, I like
that candy murder because it still has that murder mystery aspect,
which I don't even likely. I'm not a big you know,
murder mystery gal, but I'm really really liking it. I
(12:45):
find you're so charming and cute on the show about
And it's a crime that she wasn't nominated for an
Emmy and Stephen Martin were nominated for Emmy's. That is
bullcrap criminal. Yeah with they both were, right, Stephen Martin,
what happened? I cannot speak for the Academy. Let's start
(13:07):
a petition like that's messed up. I would also you
know who else? And I've only seen clips of this
because I've ben't watching in a long time, but the
fact that Mandy Moore didn't get an Emmy for this
is us Like have you seen the clips of bread?
She's she's amazing and she has been on that show
from the beginning, and she played three different generations of
the same more than that, but definitely teenager mom and grandma. Yeah, yeah,
(13:33):
that's that's not easy to pull off playing one character
as a teenager and as a grandmother. But we got
to talk to these Emmy's people. I gotta call up
these Emmy's people. Will start with Selena, then we'll do
Mandy next. Okay, yeah, but that yeah, like, what the heck,
what the heck? What the heck? Justice for Selena Gomez
(13:54):
is Emmy Yeah, justice for all the Emmy's that should
have been, I mean, nominations that should have been. Okay.
(14:18):
So the other day, I see that Chelsea Handler is
on Glennon Doyle's podcast and they just posted a clip
and let me Glenn and Doyle on this podcast, Glennon
and Abbey Like, I want both of Abby Wambach and
Glenn and Oyle. They're amazing. Anyways, Chelsea, Glenn and says
how are you doing? And Chelsea goes to answer and
(14:41):
she like her voice cracks, and you know, we're like,
we're I feel like all of us are not used
to seeing Chelsea have like emotion and being like soft
and vulnerable. But I felt like her relationship with Joe
coy like really like softened her. And so she starts saying,
She's like, I'm okay, Like I think I'm doing okay.
(15:02):
I'm he like that he blew my basically, like he
opened my heart to love like I've never experienced. So
I text Tanya and I'm like, I don't know much
about them, but I'm sad because she seems so happy
and like so in love. And I was thinking, you
know of people who I mean even I for some
reason thought about Tanya and how like when she fell
(15:25):
in love with Robbie and that love story and then
like to hear it it ended, I was like devastated
emotional attachment to this Jelsea Handler. Really, I'm like, who
are you who hardened your heart? You don't believe in
true love like this? And to be honest, I wasn't
(15:47):
like a big stand of their relationship, like I love
I liked him because she liked him so much, but
I never loved him. Well, I don't know. I just
know them as like a couple. I don't know anything
about him separate from her exactly. So what is it about?
(16:07):
That's the thing. I just that's the thing I think
she needs to be with somebody that's like a partner
to her, Oh, you didn't feel like he was a partner.
I didn't feel that he felt like she was. It
was a one sided romance. No, not one sided. I
think they obviously both were in love, but like, all
I'm saying is they just felt like he wasn't her
(16:29):
partner if you know what i mean, like a partner
in life. You know what I mean. Because he's younger. No, yeah,
I just need a little clarity because he's not a partner.
But he's not. He's a partner, but he's not a partner. No,
Like I'm saying, because you said you don't feel like
(16:50):
they love each other, it was a one side of relationship. No,
I don't think it was one sided. But I just
don't feel like he was a good partner. You can
say it's only and deliberately as you want. It's not
going to help us understand what you're saying. But she
posted this really sweet message basically announcing their breakup, but
also being like we love each other so much, like
(17:10):
he has a new movie coming out, like go support him,
and I'm just like want not her peer is that
he's not like at her level no, because I don't
think you need to be on someone's level. He's just
not like a partner. For some reason, I thought he
was younger than her. He is like five years older
(17:31):
than Chelsea, So I'm sorry, Oh yeah, I was like,
I don't I don't know his age. Yeah, but like
what it comes down to is he's just not a partner,
partner partner, Okay, all right, now Chelsea back on and
see if she agrees, like like a partner, you know,
(17:51):
a partner helps you when you're down, A partner helps you.
Probably these things. I don't know. I just had a feeling.
I know you. So we're facing this whole breakup and
you having like not being connected to it on the
fact that you think that he did not. That's what
celebrity culture is. None of us know any of these people,
(18:14):
and we just have these like you don't know that
he's had strong opinions, Like, look, I was team Jolsey
from the beginning. I was all in on that relationship.
But you, uh, like when Jeffin and Selena broke up
for the first time, you were horrified by that, and
that was like, I don't know if that was before
you guys are friends or whatever I think it was.
But I just remember you being the only one that
was surprised. Most of the times when celebrities breakup, you're
(18:35):
the one that takes it hard, where everybody else was
like yeah, figured yeah. But for some reason, like because
I just felt like they were never partnered. Got it
just to clear the air. Nothing's been cleared In case
you guys were wondering. I just was never Yeah. It
was just like not partnership. I just know. I just
(18:56):
know one that have taught me had a conversation with him,
she would be like, I changed my mind. He is amazing.
That's true. Maybe I didn't know enough. Maybe I didn't
know enough about him, that's truesting Okay, okay, I didn't
know much about him. He was the first celebrity I
ever met working in radio. He was performing at the
(19:17):
San Jose Improv in two thousand and nine and he
came by KSCO Radio and Santa Crista dude interview came
in studio. It's not a not a short drive, and
he was so cool and we talked about Jordan's and
he was the nicest guy in the world to a
bread eye and bushy tail. Easton Allen. So therefore, Joe
Cole and I are close friends and I was always
excited for him to get to I enter this relationship,
(19:38):
and I'm sad to see it ends. Right, he's a partner.
I try. I trust Easton in this one's the partner.
But oh, you know what else was really devastating, Like
you talk about Selena and Justin Brad Pitton, Jennifer Anderson
is like such a vivid memory in my lifetime of
(20:01):
not breakup. Becca's biggest thing was if you see jen
Anison Selena's birthday, I have envy, like I don't, and
she was just like, going on, I didn't. I texted it,
and that's not the tone I was saying it, but
those are the words I use. I was just like,
at first I saw Taylor Swish posted or someone posted
a photo of Taylor Slifton Selena celebrating her thirtieth and
(20:24):
I was like, Tanya, Taylor's there tomorrow, like you know,
we need stories, and She's like, I don't think she's coming,
Like that's why they went to dinner tonight, and I
was like cool, And then I started remembering that like
Jennifer Anderson Selena somehow connected. There's like a connection there,
and I was like, Jennifer Aiston, I feel like, all
of a sudden, I'm jealous about this party because like
(20:46):
what if Jennifer Anderson's there? And she was like, oh,
I don't know she's gonna be there or whatever. But
I was like, I have envy because like I don't
get a ton of fomo or like jealousy. I mean,
I just I think it's That's why I think it's
cool that Tanya goes to you saying, but I feel
like intimidated by like that party level scares me a
little bit, but I was like it diferated. Is there
(21:08):
a movie so jealous? My whole point of the Jinn
Paradis the thing was to bring up how bleep and
good Brad Pitt looked on the press tour for his
new movie. I think it's called Bullet Train. Trailer looks
really good. Have you seen the pics? Uh No? The
man has aged like the finest of wine. But you
(21:33):
like him. I love him even though he screwed a
jen for over. It's complicated. I think they've healed their relationships,
so I think I get to feel this way again,
all right, fair. Yeah, but do you like to Angelina Jolie? Okay, alright,
alright forever. I hate that because I feel like a
lot of people were like, I hate Angelina Jolie and
(21:55):
I'm like, but you still like Brad Pitt. Oh No,
I actually like all three of them. It was my girl,
my god, and then I mean not my god, but like,
my god, he's so hot. I was not really confusing.
And then Angeline is just like a stunning human and
it seems to be a good person. Yeah. So Jennifer
was not at the party. No, Jennifer was not there,
(22:16):
but I did spend a lot of time with Becky
g who is just the cutes literally the nicest thing ever.
She is really sweet. Yeah, um, yeah, she's the cutest thing.
There were some big names there. I'm not saying like
it wasn't star studded. It's just the people who I
felt jealous over, the Jennifer Anderson's of the world exactly. Yeah,
(22:38):
she was not there, but I am trying to get
her manager on the podcast because I'm obsessed with her.
I would love that. She's like so so badass. She's
literally like modern woman energy. I heard her speak, Um,
Selena did something for International Women's Day for Rare Beauty,
did like an event and Eleen was her manager, spoke
(22:59):
at it and I literally pulled out my phone and
was taking notes because she was just so inspiring and
like not trying to be inspiring, just like telling stories
about being a woman in the industry. And it was
so moving and so powerful, do you know what I mean?
Like you know some people, you know, like they're getting
to it like a crescendo and they're making a point
and they you know, that was not her. She was
(23:20):
just literally like talking about stories and sharing her insights,
and I was just like, I'm obsessed with you. The
memory I have Eileen. Tanya was following her around the
whole party, being like, Elan, we have to get a
photo together, and she's like, Tanya, I really don't feel
like we'll do it another time. I don't feel like cute.
(23:43):
I don't want to do it, Tanya. Multiple times I
heard Tanya trying to convince her to take a photo.
I was like, Tanya, she doesn't want to take a photo. Yeah, okay,
But I was trying to get her on the podcast,
which I think she will. Well, you know what's sad
is that these days, like your gift, they're giving a
speech and the audience is watching. There's no difference in
(24:06):
whow this speech is so inspiring? I have to take
notes in my phone and I'm so bored. I'm texting
my friends like if people are so into it or
if they're just bored? Because if I were up there
on stage and that's how people on their phones, I'm like,
well I lost them. You know what's interesting. I think
she knew because I was raising my hand and like
asking questions. I wasn't like, you know, sure raising your
(24:28):
hand and yes I was, Yes I was. I'm with you, Mark.
I never thought about that. I would also think the
same thing. But also I do. I guess you have
to get people. Yeah, but church like everyone. I mean,
I guess the church is another good example. I think
people would be annoyed by someone texting, or so they think,
(24:51):
but now you have by the Bible app on your
phone offense. If you see someone like a notepad like this, like,
oh my god, they're take notes. I used to do
a lot of doodling on my in my church days,
in my youth, on the envelopes for the offering um
(25:13):
but I was gonna say something about Oh I saw
it was an old concert and it was a Google
Dolls and it was like this really cool one in
the rein of them singing Iris. I was obsessed with
the Google Dolls. Yeah, they were like iconic. Why were
you watching? As it was a TikTok and it was
(25:34):
like I just go and watch old concerts for they
were performing. The Google Dolls performed on Live with Kelly
and Ryan one day when I was there, and I
was like, it's taking everything in me not to go
up to this guy and say that I'm like wildly
obsessed with you. But the video it's pouring rain, they're
on stage singing Iris and it pants to the crowd
(25:57):
and not I mean there were no phone, there were
no cell phones, and everyone's like zoned in dancing, passionately singing,
And I was like, man, I know that like having
a phone, there's a great a lot of great things,
but wow, like we were so desensitized to just being
black balloon is black balloon makes sir fly? It was
(26:21):
like underrated in my opinion, yes, well not underrated. I
think they had their time. I don't think they had
the time. They deserved. Yeah, they had a song on
the chart like two years ago. Oh I don't think
they get cold Play and trade and somebody. Yeah, man
Goo dolls were my Oh man, have you ever been
(26:42):
to a cold Play concert? Yes, that's on my bucket list.
Many envy, there's the envy again, Envy. They did a
really intimate eyheart performance when you're at Oh No, I
want like a stadium where I can see all the
phone like they did. Um. I remember it was they
did the Rose Bowl and it was Alessia Carra was
opening for them, and I went with Alessia Carra's team,
(27:05):
so I have to go backstage, and I was watching
like Chris Martin playing like Hacky Sack back there and
like just being so cool with every person I was
working backstage. I was just like this guy Tony doesn't
even know what she's yeah and no, no, I knew that.
I was like, did Chris Martin Just He's just like
kicking it with people right now backstage. It's like early,
(27:27):
like he probably need to be at the venue at
that point. Wow. He got emotional recently at a concert,
like they were seeing sky full of stars and he
had to stop singing, like he just left the crowd
singing because he got emotional. God, I love him so much.
I love him. It comes in and he's so nice
to everybody that you feel like, is it I must
an act, But then it's clear it's not. It's not.
(27:48):
I just just and it's like so genuine. That's that's amazing,
because at his level he could be He honestly could
be horrible. He guess American top fort you last year,
and he like, was so nice, and then halfway through
he stopped. He's like, Eastern, I just want you to know.
This script is brilliant. This is these jokes are so funny,
and I was like, oh my god, I listen to
(28:10):
that clip over and over. He's the best. If you
ever need a boost, a morale boost frequent um. Speaking
of the holding up your phone light, I got to
explain to my kids the other day of what we
used to do before we had phones and the lighter
out there. They were very surprised that that many people
had lighters at a concert, like, why, well, there's plenty
(28:31):
of smoking back then, and that's the only reason I
can think of. Yeah, that is fascinating though, like that
that many people smoked yeah, if you had a twenty
people concert, there were twenty thousand lighters out there, which
seems dangerous, I was gonna say, And also that they
were just allowed. Is that Can you still bring lighters
into a venue? Know? I think so? I don't know.
(28:53):
Oh crazy, Okay, I don't think we've taken a single break.
So we're gonna take a break and right back, like
when the flow is slow and he's got to go
with the flow. All right, we're back and we have
(29:20):
some emails, so Mark take it away from the basement,
all right, Becka, thank you very much. Apologies for the
hum in the background. That's a water heater. Here we
go from anonymous. I have a cousin that I'm super
close with. He has a girlfriend and he has had
her since January. And this girlfriend has a five year
old son. We see them every single time we go
over there. She's very sweet. He's really into her, and
(29:41):
he told me he wants to ask her and her
son to move in with him. Here's the dilemma. I
also recently found out from a friend who bartends that
he knows her and that she has an only fans account.
He showed me your page and said, he knows people
that subscribe to it. She's been doing it for about
a year, very active on the account, uses a fake name,
and films herself having sex with other men. Wow, only fans.
(30:06):
I know for a fact what I know for a fact.
My cousin would not be okay with this. He has
no clue and wants to ask you to move in.
I'm looking for advice. I can't bring myself to tell him.
I even have a friendship with her and sometimes we
text and make plans to hang out. How do I
look at her now? I'm so uncomfortable. Help give me
some guidance. Thank you. She has to tell the girl
(30:28):
that she saw her account and that I think. I
think that's the way to do it too. Yeah. I
think you take her aside and say, look, I do
you know this bartender Guss. Yeah, I met Gus and uh,
he showed me your account. And I know that cousin
is not going to be happy with this. I think
you got to tell him, because if you don't, I will. Yeah,
but then what does she do If she doesn't tell him,
(30:50):
then you gotta tell your cousin. You can't let him
walk into this trap like it's like you do you girl,
like get get, get the money, do what you gotta do.
But you gotta be upfront about what you're doing because
there's someone like someone that I love involved, and I
just know that knowing him, we're really close, I know
he wouldn't be okay with this, So I wanted to
(31:11):
come to you first. Make it seem like you're just
like like you're not trying to go against her, You're
just you're you're looking out for your cousin who you love. Yeah,
I mean that is still cheating on him. If you're
having sex with other men, even if it's not only fans,
that is cheating and dangerous. You're right. I sorry, in
my mind, I was thinking only fans being more like photos,
(31:34):
she's cheating on him. So I think it's like there's
not there's not many jobs where like you can get
clamydia from another person, park if you kept that a secret,
that would be a bad sign. Yeah, yeah, I think
I agree that. I think going to her first and
giving her the chance, and then if she doesn't, then
(31:56):
I do. I mean, I would look out for your
cousin because it's already it's already not great that this
is happening and he doesn't know, so I would do
it as soon as possible. Yeah, I mean having like
having an only fans account would not bother me, honestly,
but he still should know about that. Even you wouldn't
(32:19):
care if Robbie hood of only fans account, well yeah
if yeah, I would care, but I would less care
if he was not having sex with people. I think
you would care all around, but I don't know. The
sex really throws it to another level because you're cheating, right.
I didn't know only fans with that graphic. I also
(32:40):
didn't I didn't know that either. So if Robbie had
an only fans and all he would doing was kind
of a puppet show with his genitalia, that's it, a
puppet show, something from any sort of reality that like,
I can't even put myself in the situation. That's good though,
(33:00):
Eastern he's cutting fish nude. As someone who knows what
triggers your jealousy, I can guarantee you'd not be okay.
You would not be okay with any of it. Yeah,
it would. It would stress me out for sure, But
I'm saying I probably wouldn't like break up with him
over it. But then again, if it's been years and
(33:21):
I didn't know, that's like super slot. No. Yeah, if
he didn't tell you, that's that's the betrayal. That yeah, yeah, alright, man,
that's stuff. This is from Shaney. Shaney says, my wife
and I haven't married for six years, and together for eight.
We spent a healthy amount of time apart trips with friends,
work retreats, so forth. However, I may be traveling for
work starting next year in Israel or Ireland. I live
(33:44):
in Portland, Oregon for up to a year. I'll be
able to come home every once in a while, and
she'll be able to visit me. But I know Becca
has experience in long distance and time apart from Hailey
when she's on tour. I'm very secure in my relationship
and there are no trust issues or anything like that.
I'm just worried about being homesick and being about being homesick, sorry, homesick,
and being away from her and the dogs for so long.
(34:05):
We have two huskies named Elvis and Fox, and do
you have any advice on what I can do to
make it a little easier. Those are both Harry Potter references.
By the way, those dogs oh, I've never seen or
read Harry Potter, but that's a that's a red flag
for for Haley and for me honestly. Um. I actually
(34:27):
so when Haley and I first started dating, she basically
immediately went on tour. So that was their first year
of our relationship basically, and we didn't know anything else.
So that first year was pretty I mean, it was hard,
but we just adjusted to it because there was no
other option, and I would go out and visit when
I could. Um. But Haley is actually about to leave
(34:48):
on tour again in August for eight weeks. It's gonna
be so different because like we had the whole pandemic together.
We've spent so much time together and she's gonna be
gone and I obviously I'm the same way. I'm very
secure in our relationship. I trust her. It's more about
me feeling alone, you know, and being by myself and
(35:09):
her not being there and like our normal routine. But
we've like just made made it clear of like making
sure that we have a time at some point to
at least FaceTime or talk on the phone at some
point during the day. I mean, being in a different
country makes it way harder because I remember when she
was in Europe, like that was really challenging finding times
that worked for both of us to talk. But um,
(35:32):
that was the one thing. Was like making sure we
have time to like catch up on our day that
feels like something that we normally do, and then like
once a week checking in, like you know, like something
we appreciate about each other, you know, just like validating
and making sure that both feelings are heard and needs
are hurt. Because even I'm like I always sall Haley,
(35:54):
like I don't need a ton of attention in the
sense of like phone calls and facetimes, but just like
a text here and they're like, hey, thinking about you,
just so in the middle of her routine and like
work schedule, knowing that she's thinking about me. Because we've
been together for four years, so it'll be different compared
to like our first year together. Crazy, but like our
(36:14):
first year together, we were like so obsessed, like we
were just like waiting for the text like any time
we could get it. And obviously I'll be more that
way when she's gone, but um, I just told her, like,
you know, I'll communicate what I need as I need it,
But I'm not like I'm not unrealistic. So I think
it's just figuring out times to talk and like catch
up on your day and have face times and maybe
(36:37):
some like letters that's cute and romance or postcards, nudes,
nudes like whatever you need, but don't make anybody's day,
you know, like they do. And I'm going to travel
a lot. I think I'm just gonna like try and
(36:58):
pack my schedule. And I'm also going to go on
tour for like different stuffs. So it is a weird thing.
I was actually having. I don't know if I was
having this conversation with you, but I was having with
one of my friends, and I was like when I
was in my single dumb of those years of just
like super single, I was sleeping home by myself every night,
like thriving, like fine, you know, I don't need anybody
(37:20):
to sleep without my vibrator, like chilling. Now that I'm
in my relationship, like I don't want to spend a
night away from him, like I don't ever, like I
don't can't tell you the last time I spent the
night don't without him, but I can't, Like I'm like
people that are married for however many years, like that's
such a crazy because you get so used to it,
(37:42):
Like I'm just so used to having him, and I've
never had that before, you know what I mean. It's
like a weird thing to think about. That happened in
a matter of like a year and a half. I think, oh, yeah,
it's struggle, real bad. But wait, this is so funny
because like, for a long time, I'm Tanya only sought
(38:02):
out men that were like distance, like there was like
some sort of protection this guy, another New York guy.
But like thinking about your relationship with Robbie, Like if
if you felt that way about any of these guys,
that would have never worked. I know, but I think, Okay,
So when I was doing calling in the one, I
realized that was my pattern. I was going for men
(38:24):
that were like either emotionally or physically unavailable so I
couldn't attach myself to them, so that I couldn't get hurt.
I get it. I mean, I think a lot of
people probably do that without even realizing they do it.
It's very like psychologically. I also think there's podcast episodes
where I talked about like wanting to have separate beds
from the person I ended up with, Like I was like,
(38:46):
I love sleeping alone, Like I can't imagine like always
having someone, like like getting used to sleeping with someone
in the bed with my back. I was like, like
another body and now I know. Well, we were saying
before the podcast, like there's I was saying, how there
was this guy that he's now married with a child
and he had d M me like way before he
(39:09):
met his wife. But I was and we were just laughing,
saying like how funny it is now he's married with
the baby and all the other things that have changed
since that time. And I was like, oh my gosh,
probably half of Los Angeles has d MS from me,
at least at least half of l Anny Beck. I
saw a hot guy in Trader Joe's. I only saw
(39:30):
his profile, but I noticed he had an earring and
he had a slight facial hair. He's probably about five tin.
Let's try and find him. You had nikes on I did,
and sometimes I found them. We did. We Yeah, there
was some good investigation. Well did I give any good
advice on that? Yes, I think you did. I don't
(39:52):
feel any dad to it. I have nothing to add
to it, because I would be horrible. Yeah, I hope
you never have to go through up. Yeah. It sucks,
it really does. And I will be honest. When Haley
went to she went to like Europe and Portugal recently,
and I was not. It wasn't like my best portrayal
(40:14):
of myself, you know, because it was our first time
basically since before the pandemic, that we had been long
distance for that amount of time, and she was the
time difference was challenging for me. Struggled because like in
the beginning of our relationship, I only spent half of
my nights with him because I didn't meet the kids,
(40:34):
you know, I didn't meet his kids until a year
in and so I was kind of used to like
the fifty fifty of it, like I didn't sleep with
him every night. I slept with him some nights, um,
and then once I met the kids and was around
when I was around them more, now I just, um,
I always sleep there. But it it's so crazy, how
like now I can't even I can't imagine it. I
(40:54):
remember actually when you were fifty fifty that you would say,
like you still slept really well in your bed by yourself. Yeah,
I was like totally fine. And now if I had
I would be like, it's like a full We gotta
like really take care of Tanya if she ever has
to sleep alone at her apartment. Tragic, tragic, truly, Okay, Tanya,
(41:15):
we gotta address first of all, we gotta get you
back in the Facebook scrubbing. You know, I just keep
trying to tell me to double authenticate myself and I'm
just like, oh my gosh, I can't. Anyway, I didn't
share what a scrubber has done, and no problem because
a lot of people dammed it to me. That's that's
how I saw it. Um. But her name's Jenna, and
we were talking about j Lo's newsletter on the podcast
(41:37):
last week and I was like, should I get a newsletter?
She literally mocked up a Tanya newsletter that was really cute.
The Tanya Times, how to start Living Sunny, woke Up,
cute butterfly sightings this week felt be significant. I mean
notable stories this week, how to get hands, like Robbie
(41:57):
getting through, getting through a phase of songs, have your
own Taco Tuesday. I mean, this is high. What's her name?
I'm going to hire her as a graphic designer. It's
so cute and like her drawing of Sunny is like perfect, perfect,
I mean she was a model, Jenna. Is it door
door on? Dorian? I don't know. We're on the run, Jenna.
(42:21):
I'm reaching out to you because you are so talented,
so talented, and it's so cute, and it made me
kind of want to do a newsletter, you know what.
It made me want for you to get back into
the scrubbing anger. I know, I'm going to try because
I think so I had like scan something. I think
if I have my computer and my phone, I can
figure it out who kicked out of Facebook. I was
talking to Crystal and I was saying, like, we I'm
(42:43):
gonna start. I'm gonna make a scrubbing in TikTok and
like upload you know, the clips and stuff that she
puts together, and then also just like you know, weird
or funny things Tanya and I do. Once she starts
doing TikTok's with me soon and she was like, you know,
I'm so protective because TikTok, like it goes out to
so many people that aren't even maybe listeners of the
(43:04):
podcast or no our personalities or who we are. And
she's like, I just don't want them to be mean,
and I was like, yeah, I get that. I was like,
but at least if they're not listeners or they're like
stranger danger to us and don't know us, it doesn't
sting as bad as it does when someone who's like
a scrubber and like knows our personality says something. You
(43:26):
agree hmmm. I don't know about that, do you? But no,
that will bear bring it on to calm itself. Just
leave it. No, I have a shield. I have a
force shield. Okay, she has a for shield, so I
think three five. I can't get past this. That's right,
(43:46):
And shout out to Alison, who had a birthday yesterday's
Happy birthday, Alison Allen. Such a cute a literally alliteration name.
That's why she married me. She wanted the name. Yes,
she always she always says that, thank you very much.
That will be very special when she listens to this
um later in the month. All Right, I hope you
(44:12):
all have a great week. We'll be back Thursday with
Karen Fox, so check that out. And we love you,
love you bye.
Hosts And Creators
Tanya Rad
Rebecca Tilley
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