No More Sugar Coating

Dean, Jared & Vanessa keep finding ways to improve at dating, but maybe the best choice is no relationship at all.

We talk to Brendon Watt, author of "Relationship, Are You Sure You Want One?".  Get rid of the "fairy tale complex", and find new levels of intimacy. 

Then we hear from Brett and Devon Kolomyjec about their app "Happily", which is a one stop shop relationship resource. 

Plus, Dean, Vanessa & Jared break down all the new guys on Hannah B's season of The Bachelorette.

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hell, Hi Suck At Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared
and I Heart Radio Podcast. Hello everyone, thank you so
much for joining us on another episode of Help I
Suck At Dating and Boy oh boy, do we have
a special episode for you Today. We're gonna be talking
with Brendan Watt, the author of Relationship. Are you sure

(00:21):
you want one? We're gonna be talking with Brett Colo Magic.
I'm gonna I'm sorry, miss pronounce, who has invented an
app that will help you break out of the rut
of the boring, monotonous dates that you go on. We're
gonna talk. I guess what's going on in our lives.
But this past weekend was Mother's Day. Um and Jared,

(00:42):
I know you have a mother. Vanessa, I know you
have a mother. So how was your guys weekend? What'd
you do to celebrate? I called my mother, I said
Happy Mother's Day. We talked for quite a while. She
had to work, but she lives in Rhode Island. I'm
in California. I should have sent her flowers or chocolate
through the mail. I really did not plan that properly.
I'm a add son. Thank God you're not my son,
because I would I called. We talked for a while.

(01:05):
You know, it was a great I mean I talked
to her on the phone almost every day, so I
guess that's really not any different. Talk to your mom
phone every day, not every day, probably every other so sweet,
it's like a lot. No, I talked to my mom
every either every second day or every day, and my
sister every day. Yeah. It's also it's different because I'm
accustomed to seeing them every few days and now I

(01:27):
don't see them for months at a time. And A no,
we don't FaceTime we I should FaceTime my actually facetimes
her parents. Yeah, I know he was a three times
a day. I know this is a really messed up
thing to ask, But do you guys ever think about
what your life is going to be like after you
don't have them there anymore? Yeah? It scares out of me. Yeah.
I used to have nightmares when I was a kid,
like I didn't want anyone dying around me. I don't

(01:49):
want to die. Um, And I only lost one grandparents.
I still have three other grandparents with me. And it's yeah,
but it's devastating because, like you know, like people get old,
or even if they don't get old people get sick,
and it's just it's hard. It's it's a hard concept
to grasp. I mean, the thing is like, you guys
are gonna have to deal with your parents deaths at
some point, you know, No, I know, it's it scares me.

(02:12):
It honestly is one of the reasons why I want
to move back home, because, you know my parents. My
dad's in his sixties, my mom's in her late fifties,
and you start, you know, you just hear scary things
like I know that, uh, you know, Ben's dad, this
is public knowledge kind of went through a little bit
of health crisis a couple of years ago when Ben

(02:32):
was the Bachelor, and uh, it's just scary, you know,
because it just happened so quickly, and I just, oh,
I think about that constantly about my life after my parents.
It's it's probably my biggest fear is losing them. And
he doesn't send his mom flowers. I talked to my
mom every other day. I should have said through flowers,
I'm a Jericho. It's hard through the mail, and I was.
It was. No, I'm not justifying, I'm justifying of that

(02:54):
I'm a bad son. She knows you love her. No, yeah,
and and you do something special on another day and
it makes it more special because she's not going to
expect it. No, exactly right. Every day is so, so, Vanessa,
what did you do for Mother's Day this past weekends?
So I was a really good daughter and I decided, no, actually,

(03:19):
I want to do something non traditional because I get
together with my family every Sunday, so it's, you know,
always the same song and dance you said around my
gam at this table. We have lunch and then we leave,
and I'm like, well, I want to do something where
they can gain from uh an experience, and so I
brought in a woman who curates this two hour session.
We started the day off with the meditation session, and

(03:40):
then she led us into creating our own vision boards,
which is basically thinking about things that you want to
do for your future and envisioning this, you know, whether
it is something you want to change in your work,
love life, um uh, you know, with your health or whatever.
So we all sat around and we're open about things
that we wanted to change, and um we did this

(04:02):
really really beautiful exercise that I want to do with
you guys too when I'm back in l A we
wrote ourselves a letter, and a year from now, this
woman is going to mail us this letter, and hopefully
all the things that I wrote down in this letter
to myself I will have accomplished in the in this
next year. You remember what you are you willing to
share any of it with us? Or is it something

(04:24):
It's nothing that big? But I think you know, I'm
pretty much an open book, and I just want to
keep this to myself. Surely that's fine, that's fair. Keep
things some personal. Let me are they achieving? Like, are
they very achievable? Or are they things that you would
be very very proud of yourself if in a year
you accomplished this. So it sounds so silly. One thing

(04:46):
that I'm like super happy about. I don't know, Jared,
if it's like you moving to l A was something
that you've always wanted to do and that move is
like the biggest, a really big accomplishment for me. No, Okay,
well I don't know for me. Well, like for me,
coming back to Montreal and living in the Old Port
was something that I never thought I was ever going
to be able to do. And the fact that I
live in my favorite part of the city is something

(05:07):
I'm really proud of. And so it's just like little
things like that that we wake up and we take
for granted. So it's really things that are I know
I'm gonna be able to accomplish, but I feel like
the things are the easiest we kind of let go
of and we don't focus on those things. So I'm
trying to hold myself accountable to some of the smaller
things that I want to accomplished. When totally when you
say we don't focus on them, you're saying like we

(05:27):
don't give ourselves enough credit for the small things that
we're doing for ourselves. Is that what you mean? Yeah, yeah, exactly,
A little like those little, you know, moments of victory
we feel that put things into perspective. Yeah, you know,
you get that all the time. Like I, for example,
I take my health for granted times knock on wood
and you know, you you see people that are going

(05:48):
through very difficult times with their health right now, and
then you realize how lucky you are just to have that.
Um but health, it is a big one. Oh, totally right.
You know. Uh, but when you said writing a letter,
it reminded me off. It's so stupid, But Uh, Dane
Cook wrote himself a letter when he was a kid. Uh.
It was this show called tour Gasm where he him

(06:09):
in like three other comedians went on tour and they're
all filmed it for thirty days. And he wrote a
letter to himself as a kid when he was in
high school about thirty year old Dane you know what
he wanted to be when he wanted to accomplish. And
he read it on the show live and it was
very inspiring and emotional because he just talked about how
he hopes that he's happy and he believes himself and

(06:30):
he knows he's capable of great things. And this was
when Dane Cook was at his height, and now he's
gating a nineten year old model. I would say he's
still at his height. I will I will say I
have a good friend who strongly believes in the vision
board thing, and she does it once a year, and
she's strongly encouraged me to do the vision board. He
should and whenever she says and I'm like, yeah, it
sounds like a great at you. But I just never
put it into practice and I could see how it

(06:51):
could be a positive exercise. So that's cool that you
did that, because that's basically what you You flipped through
like a lot of magazines, you see things that you like,
and then you just kind of plaster on the board
and then hopefully you can kind of will let into
existence at some point or yeah, it could be just
like I I like, I cut out a picture of Tupperwars.
My sisters like tupperwares, and I'm like, well, for me,
when I see tup wears, I see like organization in

(07:13):
the kitchen, you know, Like I want to be able
to to create my own meals throughout the day. And
I'll like, think of what am I cooking at six
o'clock and I'm starving and I have to order something
or find something to eat right now. Like I want
to be able to be more organized when it when
it comes to my cooking, Like just little things like
that that I know would make my day a thousand
times better, because yeah, I think there's a difference between

(07:33):
people who um like there's like a fine line between
people who are successful and others who aren't. And it's
just a it's a matter of being perseverance and a
matter of really dedicating yourself to what you believe in
you could achieve, because we all could achieve all these
little things and big things, but it's just a matter
of following through with them totally. You hear stories about
I hear stories all about musicians and actors and all

(07:54):
these people that are super successful today where they twenty
years ago it came to a point where either this
was gonna work out for them or they were going
to die, you know, Like there was I was listening
to interview with a very famous musician. He was talking
about how he is a very fine line between him
doing what he's doing right now, which is writing songs
and putting them out there and being very successful, and

(08:15):
the other side of that line, which is him sleeping
at his buddy's couch because he can't afford rent. And
like he just got to that point because he realized
that there was no other way. You know, it was
either I'm gonna do this or I'm gonna die trying
and persistance like that is very scary and a lot
of people and I would lose myself in this statement,
play it safe and you don't always get what you
want me to do that, but it's a little bit

(08:36):
more reassuring. I don't know, but I like the idea
of the board because I like the idea of manifesting
your dreams and putting them out because the only way
that will ever happen is if you do put it
out in the universe and try to work towards it.
So yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't really subscribe to the
idea of holidays, but all holidays for the most part, yeah,
I think they're all kind of be yes, honestly, what
about I think Christmas might be the worst of all

(08:58):
of them, to be honest worst and Thanksgiving, uh well, yeah,
I guess to celebrate the genocide of an indigenous culture.
I guess right. That's that's pretty messed up. What are
what are holidays? It's basically obviously have your Hallmark holidays,
right like Valentine's Day, Halloween, those types of things where
it's like literally all they did was create this holiday
so they could either a sell us stuff, give us

(09:19):
something to take our our freaking Roman signmaic another out on,
or you have like religious holidays. And I'm not gonna
get into and start bashing religion and religious holidays, but
a lot of this stuff, a lot of this stuff
is it's just if you, if you really like bring
it back to the origins of it all. It's almost

(09:42):
like it's the same concept of the Hallmark holidays, where
we're just making things up. It's very commercialized. But my
question is us are higher buddies Mark? What's wrong with
making things up? Why not make things up where we
could all put on costumes and go get candy. We
can all profess our love for each other on February fourteens?
What's wrong with making those things up? I get it.
But when you have holidays like Mother's Day where they're like, Okay,

(10:03):
we're gonna one day a year to specifically celebrate Mother's
That's fine, that's great that mothers can feel special and
valued on this day. But also it's like us there
other three sixt or four days to do that, things
like why do you need um manufactured holiday to do that?
But I completely agree, and I have the same feeling
about Valentine's Day. It's like, why do you need Valentine's
Day to do something special for your significant other? Um?

(10:25):
And that's kind of what really gets to me. It's like,
why do we need someone some I guess governing authority
to tell us which days we should set aside to
show value in our appreciation of the people that are
in our lives. You know what I mean. Human beings
need to kick in the ass. Sometimes it's just not
I'm not saying yeah, I'm not saying it's right. The
only one that I can really buy into our birthdays,
and even then, like time is a construct, but I

(10:45):
understand seasons are we're getting deep. I think I think
it's a beautiful I totally agree with you. I never
celebrated Valentine's Day. I don't believe in it. Um things
like Mother's Day, like, yes, I think it's a lot
of mothers like look forward to a day of like
you know, surprises and being pampered. But I think, yes,
like you said, we should be celebrating parents and our

(11:07):
friends and every every day and maybe oh yes, sorry,
go ahead, like things like Christmas and stuff. I like
the idea and Thanksgiving. We don't like Canadians will celebrate
Thanksgiving as heavily as Americans do, But I love the
idea of just getting together right like it gives you
an excuse to really get together, to cook together, laugh
and just get out of your everyday life. And that's

(11:29):
gonna be my point to maybe the reason I'm so
jaded about holidays like Christmas, Thanksgiving, etcetera. Is because of
my broken family dynamic. It's like, I don't really I
don't have a family to get together for for holidays
since I don't have a mom to call her Mother's
Day like that, So it's just gonna be like these holidays.
Bleep that f word. By the way, mark I don't
have are keep that one in there, And I do
understand that that actually makes a lot of sense to me.

(11:51):
That makes a lot of sense. That's how I've just
adopted this like me against the world approach where it's
like holidays, screw that, who cares? I like July fourth,
that one's always fun. You just get together with your
friends in the summer. It's America's birthday. So that's why
I'm right. I'm not the biggest patriot in the world either,
I would say, but it's it's just fun to come
together as a group of friends. I like them as
mile markers throughout the year. I just like it as

(12:11):
just kind of you know, as you're driving to Vegas
up there's the giant thermometer, there's the borders, but here's
I like that. There's Valentine's Quick the drive from Los
Angeles to Las Vegas. You're getting to Las Vegas, that's
your destination. So you're saying that these mile markers are
the mile markers to our death. Well, a part of
the journey is the end. And thought of it that way.

(12:33):
I was thinking more than the mile markers to the
end of the year, the year that ultimately leads what
to the end of the next year, to the end
of the next year, which ultimately and at us dying
at the same time, Like you said, you just can't
prevent that from happening. So we're all on this journey
of just trying to figure out what we want in
life and should try to make that make this the
most we possibly can, Right, But so why would do
we need mile markers to tell us how much we're
enjoying life as we go through which is ultimately leading

(12:56):
up to our death, you know what I mean? And
I've actually thought about this before in like in like
maybe a lighter sense where a lot of my friends
in Los Angeles kind of get they feel like their
time is slipping away from them. And it's because, in
my opinion, there aren't quite as many mile markers here
because seasonally, like it's it's consistently warm. You go to Colorado,
Rhode Island, um, even um Wisconsin. You have these these

(13:16):
seasons where it's like, Okay, in winter six months ago,
I was here, but now six months later in the summer,
I'm here, and so I can still. But now in
Los Angeles, like we don't have that. You know, you
lose track of time. Here it's eighty degrees basically, um,
and so it's kind of like you look back six
months and you're like, oh, I'm in the same spot
I was six months ago. But in Wisconsin, rood in Colorado,
it's like, no, six months ago you were freezing your
ass off, and now you're here. I don't know that's

(13:39):
really smart next time. Yeah, But I also think the
mile markers that Mark was talking about is more to
reminisce about pastimes rather than look forward to future older events.
Does that make sense no? Well, which for example I
guess yeah, yeah, Like for me personally, for Christmas, like
I I love Christmas and New Year's Eve together, but
I lump it in together because I like the idea

(14:00):
of a new year because to me, it's simple. It's
it's symbolic of kind of a fresh start, so to speak,
and also screwed up last year. It's not screwed up,
but it's just it's it is a mile marker because
I think I understand that death will be coming at
some point, and so it is nice to really think about, Wow.
You know, here's the thing. Growing older is not a privilege,

(14:22):
right that everybody has unfortunately, and so like we're lucky
enough to have the all of these experiences. And so
that's the way I kind of look at it that
I'm grateful, like, Wow, another year, Holy crap. I guess
my thing is I never know what I'm gonna get
to Las Vegas, you know what I mean. So it's
like I might as well enjoy it and not really
pay attention to the mile markers along the way. I
think the analogy for I have no idea what I'm
gonna because you're living in a van driving around America.

(14:44):
You have no idea when you're getting in Las Vekers literally,
so kind of work. But also, like you said, I'm
getting a gun again, a gun in a van? Who
wants to date me? Um? What was? But I also
think with the mile markers like you speaked about with
Los Angeles Los Angelinos where they lose track of time

(15:05):
because there isn't that much mile markers. I think for
human beings, we like the idea of mile markers with
holidays because it does help us keep track of time
where it doesn't just slip by another year, like they
provide comfort to us. I understand we're creatures that that,
uh seek comfort at all times. Tony Robbins actually or no,
what was it, Tony Robbins. Someone speaks a lot about
are you a Tony Romans guy? I like kind of am.

(15:27):
I don't subscribe to a lot of his like be
your best self that type of stuff, but he's some
good points. Yeah, no, I agree, Um, I take what
he says with a grain of salt, but I still listen.
But where he were were as a species we just
seek comfort and everything that we do and am I
actually had this conversation just recently. Uh. I don't necessarily
like the idea of comfort because I feel like growth
doesn't happen as much it can happen of course in comfort.

(15:48):
But I think that when you're forcing yourself to be uncomfortable,
like living in a van, you experience more growth, at
least personally, right, Like, obviously we're all different points in
our lives. Um, it's just kind of it's it's how
I've experienced it. I I agree, But I think there's
a gray area there. Oh, oh my god, the biggest
gray area right like it didn't. So you you like
putting yourself in in like experiences, yeah, absolutely, but yeah,

(16:13):
like walking on the side of well, I know I
saw your story in China when you were walking on
the ledge of a mountain. I was walking on the
figurative ledge of a mountain. But Last Bachelor and Paradise
stated two girls, that's true, wild child, there's no stop
in me. So that's that's my Sorry to get us

(16:34):
at track there, that's my bad. No, that was a
very interesting conversation. It makes me question how much comfort
one needs in their own life to continue. I remember,
I remember Tony Robbins brought it back to this one
point that whenever you shower, you always shower in warm
water because we're creatures of comfort and we like being comfortable.
But when you start to shock your system and take
cold showers and all this kind of stuff. We saw
that in this documentary he jump in and how it

(16:57):
can be like rejuvenating and all. This guy has all
these like mental side of facts, all that kind of stuff. Yeah.
I think he wakes up every morning and takes a
cold shower. Yeah, and I can do sometimes. I used
to do that a lot more, but but it sucks, right,
Like you want to be warm in the shower. You
want to get out? Yeah. Yeah, when I shower once
a week, I want to make sure I'm getting that
hot water. Um wow, once a week. Huh, you just

(17:18):
get like three points in my buck. Um. Okay. We're
gonna have Brandon Watt on the phone next, but before that,
we're gonna take one quick break. Dean. Do you have
a bed for your van yet? I do not? Well,
have you considered sleep number? I have what I'm worried
I can't afford one? Oh well, guess what you can Really,
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(17:39):
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(17:59):
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(18:22):
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(18:45):
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(19:05):
I gotta get the bed from my van. So on
the phone right now, we have a special guest. Uh
you can get his brand new book Relationship, Are you
sure you want one? And you can check out his
vlog No More Sugarcoating that is on YouTube. We have
Brendan Watt on the line. Hey b thank you for

(19:26):
having me. Brendon, where you calling from right now? I'm
in l A. You're in l A. You're right down
the street. Should be came in studio. I mean, as
much as we love the sound of phone calls, you
know in studio have been great. But that's okay. But Brendon,
let's talk about you for a second. First, first of all,
who are you? Who are you? And secondly, what are

(19:46):
you doing in l A? Well, I mean, well who
am I is? Uh? Well, I'm kind of loaded question obviously,
but grew up in Australia and actually it was a tribesman,
so most of my younger years and then um started,
you know, doing some different things and facilitating some different

(20:07):
classes and stuff, and now travel the world and help
people out with different areas and changing their lives. And
you are here in l A because you have a
very exclusive to our class that you're hosting tomorrow night.
Can you talk about that for a second? I do.
It's to cost in the l A here called Relationships
Done Different. It's the intra class. So it's going to be, uh,

(20:29):
it's going to be a little bit about the stuff
that we've gotten the book, but also looking at relationship
from a different place so that people you can start
getting a little bit more aware of what works for
them in relationship. I mean for me, I learned how
to do relationship from everybody around me. But the problem
was that was everybody around me didn't know how to
do relationships. So it's already not learning how to not

(20:51):
really do relationship the way it works for me. Um. Well, Brenton,
it's interesting because I don't have a lot of people
know but and Moan and you are you have a
working relationship now, but before that you were partners in
a romantic relationship. I think it was what for a
little bit over seven years. Yeah, we actually we wrote

(21:13):
the book and then um, I think it was a
couple of months before the book was due to get launched.
We actually ended the relationship. But who does that? Who
watched the book relationship and then ended? So how does
someone get from being in a romantic relationship to then
writing a book together and having a work relationship together.

(21:35):
Because there's so many people that ask do you believe
that you can be friends with an ex lover? Um?
And for me, it takes about you know, it takes
a while. It takes a couple of months too close
to a year for those feelings to completely dissolve. So
how did you guys get there? Well, good question, and
this is one that comes up a look because most
people what they do with my separated relationship is they

(21:57):
try and find a separation in order to make themselves
for ending the relationship. So they'll go, well, you did this,
and they'll dig out things from years ago. We did
this years ago. This makes me right in the breakup,
rather than look at it and go okay. One of
the things we talked about in this book, and one
of the things we had in our relationship was Okay,
did it gets to the day that it's not working,

(22:17):
Let's end it, let's celebrate it, and let's move on.
And that's what we really practiced with with us ending
the relationship was Okay, the relationship is not working, can
we still be friends? And because we work a lot
together as well, it was we recognize that our friendship
was still valuable. Mm hmm, Well, I guess the biggest question,
especially for someone like me who gets a lot of

(22:39):
anxiety when things aren't going well or not going as
well as I would hope they would be going either
like a month in two months, in a year. And
how do you know when your relationship is really over. Well,
you've got to be honest with yourself. And I think
that's what a lot of us are really willing to
be in relationship or out of relationship ship when we're

(23:01):
in the relationship and you've got to look at from
the place that okay, is this actually over? And we
all I think that the biggest mistake that we make
in our lives is we act like that we don't
really have an idea what's true for us, Like we'll go, well,
it could be over, but I'm not really sure but
you actually do know when something is not working for
you anymore. So I think he's just being on a

(23:21):
switch yourself and looking at it and going, okay, is
this gonna work anymore? And then I have a question.
I have a question for you. So back to the
topic before that one. Um, you mentioned that you and
your former partner we're writing this book, but you broke
up before it came out. But now you guys are
work partners, right, So how does that work? If you
were to find someone that you were interested in, is
she involved in that process? And vice versa. Are you

(23:42):
guys okay with seeing each other dating other people? Because
that's got to be kind of awkward, right, Well, it
can be, but once again, it's it's the way you
really make it. I Mean, we have this idea that
it's going to take a certain amount of time before
you're over each other. But the thing is when we
have those ideas, is that's how long it's going to type.
One of the things that I've learned is your point

(24:03):
of view create your reality. So if you've got the
point of view that okay, it's gonna take me this long,
and I'm going to be horrified when they get this
together with somebody else, then it's gonna take you that long.
And as soon as they get together with somebody else,
she's going to be horrified. So we talk about it
like we've looked at it and doing okay, Well, I'm
obviously going to be with other people, and you're obviously

(24:23):
going to be with other people, So let's talk about it.
We've looked at it when okay, cool? So yeah, I
respect it. I think as long as you take a
mature approach to it, it can be tricky. But as
long as you're open and communicative and transparent with everything,
I guess that kind of helps avoid a lot of
the issues. Brandon. You talk about asking if you're a
heart tripper, a head tripper, or a crotch tripper, what

(24:44):
are those? What are those three things and what does
each one mean? I know you're gonna talk about the class,
but give us a little brief synopsis and leave a
tease so people have to go tomorrow night. Okay? Cool?
So the head tripper that the three ways that you
can identify yourself, but I mean they mean, they really
have no irrelevance. I'm already calling it. Dean's a crotch tripper.

(25:05):
I don't even know what it means, but Dean's it
so to do out? Now we've got to figure you
do out? Um, But I mean it's irrelevant, but it
gives people a way of identifying, Okay, where am I
functioning from here? So the head tripper is somebody who
will be thinking all the time. There will be somebody
who'll be thinking in a relationships. They'll be when are

(25:26):
they going to call? Why haven't they called? How long?
I can't go to your head tripper? That don't worry,
I'm my head tripper. Two, it's time. Um. The heart
tripper is someone who will be what does this mean?
How meaningful is this? He only got me six roses?
Twelve roses would have meant way more for the heart
tripper of someone who functions a lot from meeting. And

(25:48):
then the crotch tripper, somebody who's always looking to prove
who they are based on their sexuality. You know, I'm
so sexy, looked at me? This is how they come.
I'm getting pointed at in studio. Apparently I'm the cross tripper. No,
I feel like you're the complete opposite, Like, don't you
don't want the attention, You're like, no, I'm not handsome.

(26:12):
Well you can also, you know, you can also function
from all three if that's what works for you. Okay, Yeah,
I feel like I'm a head tripper and a hard tripper,
Like I'm constantly thinking I want to know the meaning
behind someone's actions. But I also I guess that's like
hard and head right, like if they did something for me,
why do they do it and what does it mean?

(26:32):
Instead of just like appreciating it and like being in
the moment. Well united thing with that is because I've
done it, like I'll be I've had so many situations
in my life where I'll head trip about it. I'll
be thinking this is gonna happen, what if it happens,
And I'll be running through all the scenarios in my head,
and then I'll get to the get to the time
when the things occurring and none of what I thought
about Because so I was like, Okay, I just wasted

(26:54):
a wake of my life thinking about how this is
going to show up, and I didn't work that way
at all. So what we do with these three things
is we we give up so much of ourselves and
we were not present with ourselves. So we're wasting all
of this time in our lives in order to figure
out what something is, how something's going to occur, rather
than just go okay, it is what is When it

(27:15):
shows up, I'll deal with it. Then, Brenda, do you
believe in soulmates? No? What's your mind? Well? I started
recognizing that the idea of a soul mate is the
idea that there's one other person that's going to complete
you in this world. So when you have the idea

(27:35):
that one other person is going to complete you, you've
already decided there's something missing. And this is what I
see a lot of people do when they go into relationship,
is they say, well, there's something in me missing that
a relationship will fulfill. Once you go to that, you've
already put the relationship under way too much pressure to
have any freedom with it, because you're already looking for Okay,

(27:57):
how does this person fill in my life? Rather than
how can they add to it? How can they contribute
to it? How much fun can we have? Mm hmm, Well,
I like something that Simone had said about I guess
that they you explore more into the in the book.
You want to make sure you have someone that you're
doing more than what you would be doing if you

(28:18):
were alone. So you want to have a partner that
helps you grow instead of demean or light right, Yeah,
well it's actually twenty times more. Um. But it's that
it's having someone and you lost. That's It's like when
we think that when two of us get together, then

(28:39):
we can create twice as much. But when you get
into a relationship with somebody who actually is willing to
contribute to their energy plus your energy contributing to one thing,
credit is way more than two times. So it's having
that personating loss to Actually, you know that when you
when you're around someone, and usually most of us have

(28:59):
someone in out lot, but when you're around me, just
feel like more. I feel it. I feel like more
of myself right now? What if we could have that
in relationship. There's a there's a great quote from an
Oscar winning movie, uh called Cool Runnings. Yes, I know,
Cool Runnings. There's a there's a line that Herb says.
He says, if you're not enough without it, you'll never

(29:21):
be enough with it, And I think that kind of
applies to the situation as well exactly. Um, And I
heard that quote in that movie. I wrote it down.
I was like, that's a great quote, and so it's
it's refreshing to hear you kind of say something very
very similar to that. Yeah, Brandon, before you go, I
have a quick question. Do you watch Bachelor in Paradise, Australia. No,
I don't. That's a shame. I was on it last year.

(29:42):
It's the only reason I was asking. I've done my homework.
I've looked to you guys up just as you've looked
me up, so I know you're on it. I just
haven't got a chance to watch get sometimes we're all
on The Bachelor in America. But I made a quick
stint on Bachelor in Paradise, Australia last year and it
was funny. Lier this year, there's a couple that came
up to me and they said you're Jared and I

(30:05):
was like yeah, and they're like, oh, we watched Bachelor
in Paradise, Australia. And it was the first time anybody
recognized me from that show. And I felt pretty cool
about it. Night a line. Yeah, I loved it, and
I still haven't been No, unfortunately, what part of Australia
from I'm from the Sunshine Coast, which is I don't
know if you've heard of new stuff, but yeah, but
it's neighbors. That's that's like the chocolate you can buy

(30:26):
in grocery stories right and USA, the little chocolate packs.
Maybe always goes back to chocolate for Jean. Well, Brandon,
thank you so much for checking in with us. We
really appreciate you coming on the podcast. UM and everybody listening.
You guys can get his book Relationship, Are you sure
you want one? So? The class or night at the
Kingston Hotel UM in Hollywood, and you can find the

(30:48):
details on my website, Brandon what dot com. Um, it's
gonna be Irreverend, it's gonna be out rises, it's gonna
be fun and Tom join, which sounds good to be there.
You're gonna be there. I mean it sounds that you're
saying I might stop by and say hi. It's cool.
It's a two hour class. It's just it's right down
the streets at the Everly Hollywood Kimpton Kipton Hotel, which
is beautiful. I've been there a couple of times. It's

(31:10):
a great hotel. Um. What times it start? Because I
don't I didn't see a start time seven pm, and
when we when we say tomorrow, Just to be clear,
it's Tuesday May fourteen at seven pm. Be sure to
check it out. Um, Brendan, thank you so much for
calling in, Thanks for your time, best of luckily everything
and hopefully we'll circle back with you soon. Oh, thank you?
All right by do you know you jet? Leg? Um

(31:33):
a little I'm a little tie tie. When'd you fly back?
I got back yesterday around like noon? N issh? Wow?
So how long were you in China? For? Just like
seven or eight days? Quick little trip? How long is
it again? It's like, um, it was two flights. The
first one was fourteen hours, the next one was like
two hours, but then I had a domestic flight. Um.
Have you guys ever been in China? It's a pretty
cool country. This wasn't just China. This was like rural

(31:56):
China where people in like the main cities in China
like Shanghai don't really speak English. But you go further
inland into the rural areas, no one speaks English. So
eight days I had one conversation the entire time with
another English speaker. But it was kind of nice to
be able to go and detach. So did you just
navigate yourself around the country. International data is a very
very key component to traveling internationally. Act well, I would imagine,

(32:17):
especially for somebody who doesn't speak the language, It doesn't
know anybody, it doesn't know the landscape. No, it was.
I mean that's kind of what's great about it, though.
It's like, you know, I didn't really to talk to anyone. Um,
I just kind of gotta wander around. The weather is
really bad at first, but it cleared up. I was
actually thinking about, like how I'm going to plan another
trip to go back to China, like later in the
year when the weather was nicer. But fortunately the forecast

(32:38):
was wrong, and uh, probably the third or fourth day
the sun started shining a little bit. So well, it's great. Yeah,
it was fantastic, all right. We also have Brenton Devon
coming up on the podcast, and they have an app
called Happily, which includes date Box, which you guys may
have heard of. That's the subscription box that sent to
your door. It's like, uh, it's like games in a
box and there's little snacks and it's meant to like

(32:59):
bod on couples together. I think it's pretty cool, but
that's coming up next. And on the phone, we have
a guest. You might know one of his products called
date Box, but they just launched a new app called Happily,
which can plan your next day. Welcome to the podcast, Brett,
call him I Jack Brett. How you doing, buddy out

(33:20):
of Brett here, appreciate it. Glad to be here. Feeling good.
Feeling good. So you have this brand new app that
you guys just launched will you and your wife Devin,
We're called Happily, which to me it looked like a
date night planner, But why don't you describe it? Yeah,
so we we just forgid we branded our company to Happily. Um,

(33:41):
the app is launched. What the app is is it's
part of the tool for a couple of years to
plan day, night, finish city. And so what you do
is you pop open the app and you answer. You're
showing questions about you know, what's your interests are, and
what you're in the moon to do, and what your
budget is and how much time you have, and in
the apple actually create recommended itineraries for you and kind

(34:02):
of planned the whole date night for you. And um,
you get discounts and different things along the way at
your different thoughts, and there's conversation starters and custom playlists
in the app and all sorts of stuff. So sometimes
this fall that we're building a lay most on the
website right now, and we're super excited about that app.
It sounds like something something that's perfect for me because
I am horrible, horrible, horrible at planning dates and events

(34:25):
and yeah, you know vis here, and I think that's
the biggest thing that we're trying to hit it. I
think like whether you're dating or married or whatever stage
is kind of relationship you're in. I think there's a
thing where it's like we don't want to mess up
the date, right, so like we we kind of default
the same dinner in a movie and it's just like
the same bar. It's not that exciting and it kind
of get pregnant over time. So um, that specifically is

(34:46):
just part of a way to hopefully help people, you know,
find new and exciting things to do. And I can
do a lot of meating with that amage of conversation
and just the experiences to have together socle just to
kind of get coupled out trying new things together. BROT
would you say this is more towards, uh, somebody who's
already in a relationship and trying to plan a special night,

(35:06):
or is it targeted more towards singles trying to set
up a first date. It's definitely more towards people who
already have a day and are kind of more established
in their relationships. So at least that's our story. Like
my wife and I, you know, when we started this
company really out of that specific for us film, which
was you know, over time it just kind of became
more roommates than stuff. Is like we didn't spend a

(35:27):
whole lot together and in our lives scout busy and
um so it really happily as a whole at the
company has really are hard to making our own marriage
to say, let's let's make this the priority, and let's
spend time together and let's still I like together versus
just you know, sort of be together by default. Um,
you know, but even even in the first day scenario,
like I think that so many people are scared to

(35:50):
pick the wrong things for the first date experiences always
as the morbil as a county, and I think if
we could just expose like what those two people might
be interested in doing, and especially for the guy, like
then you don't have to just a fault to like
going to drinks at the bar or going to there
and kind of doing the same old thing. You can
really like separate that experience between the two of you
and feel like just the time to plant something fun

(36:11):
and this is to be memorable, and like this is
going to kick off our relationship if it turns into that,
you know, in a in a different and unique way.
Can you give us some examples about ideas that you
guys have for dates on the app that are a
little bit different. So the app is the app actually
will pull in any location US city, So it really
just depends. What the app does is currently get the

(36:33):
sense for which things being doing and which things um
that you're sort of building your profile around, and then
start of similar areas and similar days and locations to
those things, even throwing in the past that perience disciders.
So it's really built um unique to the individually using
the app. So there's all sorts of different things. I mean,
you know, if you range from from any number of

(36:54):
different experiences in any given city, I have a suggestion.
I mean, obviously I'm sure you have a million of these,
but I was going to go out and buy a
pistol a gun uh, And I was like, yeah, great
first date. I can really wish I had to take
on a date with me because I want to take
them to the shooting range. I feel like that would
be a pretty awesome date. There's like, yeah, there's like

(37:15):
there's always where you're like, like I thought, act at targets,
which is really cool and kind of people have a
whole lot of fun doing that. Like, just don't do
every day that I think a memorable and and just
even like lead a different conversation and and just make
experience overall. Vanessa, how would you feel if somebody asked

(37:37):
you on a first date to go to the gun rage?
I would love it. I'm some Yes, I'm someone that
I prefer experiences over like a fancy dinner or yeah,
I'd rather do something more physical and really on the
first date. Physical All right, Okay, let's stay stay it down.

(38:00):
And it's not like that, but more like you know,
instead of the traditionalists go out for drinks in the
dinner and blah blah blah. I'm like, well, I'm a
little bit picky when it comes to food. So I'd
rather um spend my money on other things that then
you know that I can be making at home. Yeah,
And I think that's the key too, because you know,
I think if we can the whole, the whole whole thing,

(38:20):
and that is the FINESTO would like that, you know,
there aren't going, how do we expose to the person
that's boring to go and plan a date for the
for him and Vanessa? How do we expose that that's
something that she would like, so that that's an option
for him to plan, right, And I think like that's
worth and risk is so high and then if vanest
that doesn't like something like that, that they feel horribly.
But you know, if I'm going on a date with

(38:41):
Vesta and I made that that was something she liked,
I have a chance throwing and make a splash and
make a first presses with something that she will really
enjoy it and might like better than dinner. And so
that some of the whole game is like how do
we expose you know, what those things are and and
help people with tools to plan and discover those things.
And on the flip side of that, if if the
personal connection isn't there, then on the other side, you

(39:03):
have at least something enjoyable to be doing instead of
just sitting across from the table of them eating food
and you're miserable. At least you can be miserable, but
you're doing something fun with them, you know what I mean. Yeah, absolutely,
I actually think that's the space that somebody like I
didn't think the day It's like like a wife on
the Experience app would be really cool. It's like, yeah,

(39:24):
if you don't have fun with the first like doing
something that you're interested in and like you're having a
good time, oh totally. And then you guys also have
the Date Box, which which is what you and Devon
are known for, which is the monthly subscription that gets
sent to your door, which is a great idea because
I'm always trying to get Ashley to play some sort
of board games with me, and she never wants to play.
It's absurd. So I like the idea of date Box

(39:45):
because then it's a it's a monthly box that we
get that has not only you guys don't have just games,
but it's like snacks and stuff that like couples can
bond over, which is pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah, they bought
the countiment alternatives to just like Netflix, you know, to
fie deal. They then I'm not really you know the
Devon and I in the contect time together. That's where

(40:05):
it retreated for us was you know, how do we
how do we find consistency in all time together and
really help other couples do that about thirty years and
we help opp topics, you know ste day Bus and
you know that Daday. We just kind of realized that
there's a lot of areas that couples on you know,
help relationships the whole part. Kids start getting the way

(40:31):
and ast and so you know, the effort to say
want to be part of that journey and with couples
and relationships are so much time you know, dating and
finding the person that would have to do with it.
And you know, from there, we want to help couples
find a way to get creative and keep that sparks alive.
We'll keep doing what you're doing. Brett. Thank you so

(40:51):
much for joining us. You guys can go download Happily
right now if you want to plan your next date.
And I also definitely check out your website because you
guys can get the date Box subscriptions sent to your
door every month. And then also Brenton Devin, you guys
have a podcast podcast called Happily and everybody can listen
to that wherever you listened to podcasts. Brent, thank you

(41:11):
so much for joining us today. We really appreciate it. Yeah,
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So I thought you might find this interesting. On the
scrubbing in Facebook group, somebody posted a bang merry kill

(44:47):
about the bat you can put in whoever you want.
Fifteen people mentioned Dean Jared Vanessa. What do you think that?
How do you think it breaks down? How many want
to bang him, marry him, and kill him? Oh god,
they probably want to bang him and marry him at
the same time. No, I bet, I bet? I mean
the most is definitely bang. I bet it goes bang

(45:09):
kill Mary's third. I bet you it's killed by Auto
Erotica Association. Yeah, all right. Eleven people wanted to bang Dean, Yes,
we wanted to marry Dean, and one wanted to kill you.
If you'd like to go out of that del further,
Caroline has had enough of you, and I would like
to send a personal message out to you, thank you

(45:30):
for putting me out of my misery. I'll give you
a Caroline post. Is it? Bang? Blake h married Bob
Guiney's Kill. He was one of the original Bachelor O
Bachelor's Kill or Robbie Hayes either one blood for for
the We do have a Bachelor atte premiere tonight Monday,

(45:50):
May thirteen. How are we feeling about this? You guys
gonna watch? Yeah, I'm gonna watch course. I want to
watch Hannah be are you How do you feel about
the guys? I mean, I have no idea who they are.
Have you not interviewed you interviews with the girls last No?
We did? Uh? I did interviews with the girls last year,
but this year we we we sat down with Hannah.
I don't know if uh, yeah, but we did not

(46:11):
meet any of the guys. Well, how do you feel
about the guy's reaction shots from there? I saw there
was like one clip that I saw some dude apparently
screaming at the top of his lungs, which is not
a good look. I'm okay, He's like he might be
like the villain. That's what I've been hearing. This guy Luke,
is there ever really a villain though, like in real
life villain? No, I'm saying like that, you know when

(46:34):
people are like the sweetheart, the villain, this whatever, Like
there's no ever really there's there was never anyone that's
really that evil of a person on the show. Oh well,
I wouldn't say that that evil. But Chad was definitely
a villain. I would say's evil, but he did like
when he like threatened to find Jordan after the show
and beat him up. He's not evilain physically threatening people.

(46:58):
He's not evil for sure. No, that was done. Well
was he intoxicated? Um? There are so I obviously don't
know any contestants, but I got it. I had an
experience with the contestant that's all this season. Don't say
the name, but tell us about the experience. It was
only it was like, I'm not gonna say the name. Obviously.
It was a very short interaction. He reached out to

(47:20):
me via Instagram and said, Hey, I'm on this season
of The Bachelorette. I go this far. I was hoping
you to give me some advice on how to move forward.
I was like, I reached back. I was like, yeah,
of course, man, like, obviously, take anything I say with
a big grain of sault blah blah blah blah blah,
but like, whatever I can do to help, just let
me know. He follows up with a message that says,
it looks like you've got a lot of Instagram followers
and I want to know how to do exactly the

(47:41):
same thing. And she's honest, and I never responded, and
he unsent the messages, and now I'm just like, well,
he's probably scared that you're gonna screech on him and
like post him or something. It's just like, come on, dude,
I'm sorry. Good for him for like reaching out and
asking what literally every other person is probably thinking in
their heads. I think it just shows the progression of

(48:02):
the show and the contestants. I just think there's a
time and place build a report, maybe build a level
of trust. Now I'm talking about it on a podcast
because the second thing you said to me was that
you wanted to build your Instagram following it's like, you know, no,
I don't respect for that, and in my opinion, so
now I'm just kind of like, I watch it obviously
because it seems like a nice girl. You met her um,
but yeah, she seems very relatable. But I guess it's

(48:23):
It's definitely to your point, Jared, It's changed, the landscape
has changed a lot, become a lot more centric on that. Yeah,
I'd just like to see it firsthand. It's kind of like, yeah,
I feel like, Yeah, we always say this that a
lot of people used to go on The Bachelor for
the experience of being on the show, and now a
lot of people are going on the show because they
like the experience after the show. Specifically, what this guy
asked about Instagram followers the wrong reasons, if you ask me,

(48:45):
that would be That's the only thing I say might
be the wrong reasons, because everything else, if you like,
I always say when people are like, well, if you
don't go on for love, if you're going off for
the wrong reasons, and I would actually argue that. Alright,
some quick emails because we gotta wrap pretty soon here,
gentlemen and lady. Uh, this is a very nice one
from an anonymous email, and I thought you guys should hear.
I've never once looked at your instagrams or even the

(49:06):
podcast website. I had no idea what you guys looked
like until today. When I finally went on your instagrams.
I've never watched The Bachelor, never seen a single episode.
So many other listeners and consumers of your other media
have a different view of who you are, that you're
plastic or so entwined with The Bachelor in social media
that you aren't quite real anymore. But I see you
as real people, and dare I say it, like friends

(49:26):
I've never known. Over the course of listening to your podcast,
I had some boy problems and flirtation ships that's a
good word, that's a really good word. Then I got
into a relationship and it's not but almost a year.
In a way, you helped me navigate my life, not
just in dating, but in all parts of my life,
as if you were really right there through it all.
I truly believe that your conversations on the podcast have

(49:47):
helped me, and many times I respond to you in
my head as if I were part of the conversation
as well that I don't know, I know, no, this
is very think. I love reading emails like this, or
I mean, when whenever we get then or whenever people
reach out to me personally and talk about Dean and Jared,

(50:08):
and how much like they love you guys, and how
much they love the podcasts, and to me, like into like,
for us, this is why we do it, you know,
like we're we're trying to be as authentic as we
can be, and you know, to get an email like
this just kind of confirms that what we're doing is,
you know, kind of working. I think a part of
the lure of a podcast is it feels like you're
just hanging out and talking with your friends. That's the

(50:30):
way this is going. Is really wonderful, and it's not perfect,
and sometimes we don't do as best of a job
as I think we all hope we could. But I
like to know that we're trying as hard as we
can and people appreciate that. So thank you, Anonymous. I
really wish you said your name. That was a great shot.
Marcoing to deal Anonymous. Sure you don't have this one,
Van S'm sorry this one came in late. This one's

(50:51):
a little bit uh subject dating with herpes. Yeah, last
year I was diagnosed with herpes. After the initial shock
and confusion, I found out it's incredibly common of the
population dealing with the same thing. I am of that percentage.
The majority doesn't even know they have her pies. Even
more astounding, the population has been intimate with someone that
has had herpies unknowingly. After doing the research, I learned

(51:13):
that the stigma behind herpes actually the worst of it.
I'm no actually dating someone new, still in the beginning
getting to know youth stage, but soon enough I'll have
to have that scary conversation with him and hopefully I
will be accepted fully. The reason I email you is
because I want to get your thoughts about dating with
an FTD. Have you ever dated someone that disclosed that
to you? How would you want to be told? Do
you have misconceptions about her pies? I love this email

(51:35):
because I do think there's a huge stigma whenever it
comes to our sexual um experiences in our past, and
this is just a The email for me is like, yes,
I think that there's a huge stigma. I've never personally
dated anyone that's disclosed that kind of information. But then again,

(51:56):
they could have had something and never had told me.
But I've always has gone to get tested at the
beginning of the relationships UM in the middle, Like you know,
whenever I get my POP test, I always get tested UM,
just you know, to be sure, because I'm a little
bit of O c D with that kind of stuff.
But I do know someone who had dated their partner

(52:17):
and the partner had UM an s t I and
this person was extremely honest with them and their partner
was understanding of it, because I think it's in the
way that you communicated. If you come out as like
it's alarming, like you know, like life or death. Like, No,
it's not life or death like you said. Percent of
the people do have it A lot of people. I

(52:37):
don't know if it's eighty percent of people who have
it or eight percent of people don't feel symptoms of
an s t I, especially of herpes UM. So I
think that, Uh, if you have an honest conversation with
your partner and in the way that you make your
partner understand what it is UM, then I'm hoping your

(52:58):
partner will be open to it and accepting UM to
your vulnerability and your openness and your honesty. Yeah, then
that's what happened with the person that I know, Uh,
the couple that I know of, they ended up having
a very healthy sexual Really is that even a term
like an active sexual relationship? Yeah, you're actively having sex.

(53:22):
I think I'm in a similar vote to you, but
that's I've never been in a relationship with someone that
has openly come out and said hey, I have this,
so it's hard to speak from experience for anonymous. UM,
when I was twenty, I had chlamydia. That was kind
of a weird thing. Thank you, thank you. I got
you know, I get my annual check up. Sometimes I
get checked my sear depending on how active I've been
that here. Thank you, good for you for getting checked. Yes, yeah,

(53:45):
thank you. I was twenty and I was dating this
girl and I got checked and they're like, yeah, you
have chlamydia, is super treatable. Just take this the Z
pack and it will be gone in a week. Um,
that conversation was hard because they were like, are you
like sexually active with anyone. I was like, well, yeah,
I'm dating this girl and like okay, here's a pack
for her as well, like make sure you have the
conversation with her, give her this until he get checked
and like going to her and be like, hey, this

(54:05):
is really weird and awkward, but I have this. This
is like super treatable and get rid of it in
like a week. But like, just so you know, you
need to go get checked now too. It was a
weird conversation and it was like, I think herpes might
be a little bit more challenging because it's not quite
as treatable. But it was like one of those moments
where I was like dressing. To Vanessa's point, I was
like dreading. The conversation was like, Okay, how am I
going to pose this? How is this not going to

(54:25):
be awkward? Wight wait till after the food comes before order? Yeah,
it was one of those things and we like we're
still friends to this day and like we continue to
date for a little bit longer after that. Obviously it
fell out for multiple other reasons. I was tony and dumb,
but um, yeah, I think I think openness and honesty
is kind of the big thing. And it's hard, especially
with this, because it's like how long do you wait
until you tell them? Um? Do you want to build

(54:47):
the comfortable comfortability level with them before you jump into it?
So I mean obviously before you get intimate, you need
to tell Oh my gosh, of course, what are the
symptoms of claim idio? I'm not I don't think there
are any that's the things, especially as okay, check for
a reason. It's just like an annual checkup. But as
a guy, it's like there are no symptoms, so it's
like you can't have it for now. I don't think
there are no there are symptoms. Some the thing with

(55:10):
s T I s very few people and I've read
up on this, very few people experienced symptoms. So that's
why it's really important to go get checked. Because even
though you could also be wearing protection, like, there's other
areas and fluids of the body that like mixed together
from wrestling. That's what he told you. I don't know,

(55:31):
because he had a breakout on his like apparently he
was wrestling. I don't know if I'm misinterpreting the story,
but apparently if I remember correctly, Duty had wrestling, had
like a breakout on his forehead and then they were
like wrestling and sweats blood to blood. There's different types
of Yeah, I don't I don't know what type it was.
That's why I don't know the extent of it. But

(55:52):
tell me about it. So what ends up happening is
when even when a child is born, like and then
an ant who has like oral herpes or whatever can
kiss the baby and then the baby gets contracted with herpes.
So it's like, I think it's just this a huge
misconception that is like, oh, like who did you sleep with? Like, no,

(56:13):
it doesn't it doesn't have to be that. Simplex one
is the sores around your mouth. Yeah, Simplex two is
your genitalia. Yes, got it, but I think you can
have one in two and you if you're a Seinfeld fanatic,
you can get them from a tractor. So just be
sure that would be gone. Yeah, she got GNA rhea
from a tract, which is also super treatable. It's like chlamydia.

(56:34):
You take his back, it's cleared up in a week.
But you know, from anonymous, there's a lot of misconceptions
about one more question on that if if you're dating
someone new in the relationship and they told you that,
would you head for z hills? I want to head
for the hills, But listen to one. You're human, right,
So if you're you're you're into somebody and they say,
hey have herpes, you know that's obviously a little I
don't know if i'd head for the hills, but I

(56:54):
would look for the path that would get me to
the hills as quickly as possible, So I would have
an escaped rude if necess there No, no, no, no no,
I mean you don't know, right, I don't know, but
I would make sure the car is turned on and
in driveing anywhere yet but in the you but for you, anonymous,
if this person reacts with hesitation, don't be alarmed by

(57:17):
that either, because I don't think you're going to tell
them and then they're just gonna say, Okay, great, no problem.
It's gonna have to have a conversation. But that doesn't
mean they can't move past, in that you can't move
past together and what she should what he or she
should do? It sounds like they have a pretty good
grasp on it, but like yet as much information as
you can about how it affects you and how it
could potentially affect someone else, because at this point, like
the more you know, the more uh you'll be able

(57:40):
to explain it better to someone else. And I honestly
don't think it's going to be that bad, but it's
gonna challenging conversation. But I think information is definitely something
that you should like and knowledge something you should have
that um, anyways, I'll do it for this week's episode
of Help I Suck at Dating? Thank you so much
to both of my lovely co hosts, Jared and and

(58:00):
sa No, thank you Dean and Mark and Easton. Guys
are the best. You guys don't get in them. Thank you,
but you really? Um, yeah, you guys are awesome. Thank
you Mark, and thank you Easton, and thank you actually
for passively standing by next to us. Well, she's recording
next up here. Big thank you to Brendan Watt. Be
sure to check out his book Relationship Are you sure
you Want One? Um and his vlog No More Sugarcoating.

(58:23):
Big thank you to Brett call My Jack. Be sure
to download Happily from the app store today or go
to happily dot com. UM. Big thank you to our
anonymous emailers. Be sure to email us. We love the emails.
Help I Suck at Dating at iHeart media dot com. Um,
share some stories with us. We'll talk through. What are

(58:43):
we doing next week? Maybe we can just have a
whole email episode. Maybe we can. Yeah, now, that was
a good time to get them in that I Suck
a Dating and I heeart media on the Instagram page.
I'll prompt people to email to help I suck a
dating I heard in Facebook and the Facebook group. Of course,
I think we have a lot more followers and Jared,
you wont tell us about book about Yes, I am big.
Thank you to Buko Pepo and this is your favorite

(59:03):
go to for celebrations, graduations, team parties, prom Father's Day.
BUCA will deliver the party to you. Just go check
out BUCA online at Bucca de Peppo dot com to
find location closest to you or to order online. That's
b U C A D I B E P p
O dot com, Pepo, that's fun to say dot com,

(59:24):
That's fun to say Cool. If you're planning a party, celebration, graduation,
go check them out online. UM. I love both of
you guys so much with all of my heart, and
thank you so much for being part of this with
me every single week. Uh. We can't wait to be
here next week. And I hope you guys as listeners
to come back and join us as well, because maybe
we will suck a little bit less. Follow help by

(59:45):
Suck at Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared on I
Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast