March 1, 2023 • 47 mins
Our OGs Bob Guiney and Trista Sutter connect with season 7 Bachelorette Ashley Hebert and get an honest update on her love life after being on the show!
Ashley opens up about her divorce and the unbelievable amount of criticism she received from men on social media, who blame her for the break-up.
Find out if she’ll get married in the future, and learn some difficult but necessary conversations to have with your kids if you and your partner are splitting up.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the almost famous podcast with iHeart Radio. Hi Bob,
how are you? Hi, Trista, I'm fantastic. How are you today?
I'm doing okay even though it's a blizzard outside, but
you know, yeah, that's Colorado for you, at least in
slight and fluffy snow like I think powder when I
think of Colorado. When I think of Michigan stell lately,
(00:21):
I think of like an ice, like black ice. Yeah. Well,
one thing to brighten our day is the fact that
we both get to talk to Ashley today. I'm so excited.
I'm excited too. I can't wait to have her on
talk about an og, talk about Yeah, I'm excited. Hi
(00:46):
are hi? Beautiful Trista, I kind of feel like you
and I look at like a little bit like maybe. Yeah,
so seriously, I feel like when You're a Bachelor and
Bachelorette came out, so many people wrote me saying that
we were twins. Oh yeah, so many people. And I
take it as a huge compliment obviously, but yes, I've
(01:07):
always thought we look alike. I feel yes, it's like
maybe the shape of horse name, I don't know, and
we're just teeny, just teeny little pocket size mind size people.
I love it. How are you? Ye? Work great? How
(01:28):
are you? I'm so excited. So Bob doesn't know this,
but I am going to Miami tomorrow, Bob with Blakeslee
because we're having a Miami Dancer alumni reunion. Oh my gosh,
how I mean, I'm so freaking nervous because I'm going
to be dancing on the court at halftime at the
next game. But yes, I know. Actually I'm done. I'm done.
(01:52):
But I'm beautiful too. It's like summer's coming. You can
feel it. The sun's just PERI actually so excited to
not be in New York right now, given the way
the weather's hit in New York for so many years.
Like I feel like my childhood and my previous life
(02:12):
is like a lifetime ago. Yeah, I mean so, it's like, God,
I would never go back there. I mean, yeah, I
never You know something about Florida that's just so beautiful,
And I think it's important for people to just find
a place that makes them feel happy every day. Like
I walk up, I wake up in the morning, I
look outside. There's so much beauty, There's so much just
(02:34):
there's so much to be grateful for. And I feel
like once you find a place where, no matter what's
going on in your life, you can feel that way about.
It just brings me so much happiness. I know, it's
really important to me. So I love that. I like
hearing that too. That's very lovely. Well, the reason I
brought up the heat thing is because I might get
to see Ashley in person. I know, um, so hopefully
(02:58):
it works out, but if not, it's business schedule yours too.
You know, we're just busy, like non stop. Soccer and
dance and basketball. Are those the things? Soccer in basketball
for forty and he's a dancer, acro yes, tell us,
(03:23):
tell us all the things about the kiddos. Okay, so well,
you know Ford is very athletic. So Ford is a
lot of things. He's very athletic. He likes to move around,
he's very physical. He's tried every sport so and he's
really great at every sport. I have to say, amazing.
But and this is probably personality. When it gets a
(03:45):
little too intense for him, like too demanding, that's when
he pulls back and he wants to try something else.
Very interesting. It's very interesting. So he has an intense
like competitive or intense, like yeah, okay, got it. Time commitment, right,
So he made um like a competitive soccer league, Like
(04:06):
he tried out and he made it. But the practices
were like three times a week, and then there were
games every weekend sometimes both days. It was too much.
The kid just wanted to break because I just want
to go home. I don't want So that's a lot
for a young kid, you know, it really is. Oh yeah, absolutely,
And I feel like we run sometimes we won't maybe maybe,
(04:27):
And that's I'll speak for myself. Sometimes I feel like
we have to fill our kids' schedules with saving things.
To me, feel like we're amazing parents for doing all
these things for them and doing our rest with Bosom.
But also I think the kids need a freaking break. Yeah,
we're going through that right now. We have a four
year old and one and a half year old, and
(04:49):
our four year old like every day, my wife like
loves to have like activities every day, and you know,
the day I was like, I think he just wants
to like sit down and watch Bluey for like an hour,
you know, and we never let them watch I'm like,
let's just chill today, Like let's do not because I
think you're right. I think sometimes it's just like, I mean,
(05:09):
I know for a fact, growing up, I was bored
a lot, and there was nothing wrong with that, you know,
I was okay to not have anything to do. Basically, Yes, yeah, well,
I feel like as they get older, too, like their
schedules will just get worse and worse and more busy
and more busy. I mean, I've said this multiple times.
I feel like, even on the podcast, when my kids
were newborns, I felt like I couldn't be any more
(05:31):
busy because I was feeding them two hours and la la,
and now, oh it beats newborn stage, it beats all
the stages. It's just once they find what they love,
which is a fun process of figuring out what they love,
but finding out what they love and what they're okay
being committed to and then committing to that like, oh gosh,
(05:55):
it is it is crazy town. It is really. Yeah,
it's intense. So those moments of relaxation and just chilling out,
zoning out. Give the phone to them, give the iPad,
give the TV. I'm all for that. Yeah. The end
of the day, like when we're finished at work, when
I go home, I want to be brainless for a
little while, totally. Like once they get home from school
(06:19):
and they always do an activity every school at at
their school. When they get home, I don't demand that
they do their homework right away and get all their
reading done, get all that done. Yeah, allow them at
least an hour and a half sometimes two hours to
yea and their brain to make decisions about what they
(06:40):
want to do in these moments, Like these kids are
so regimented, and like they tell me you have to
go here, and then you gotta move here, and you're
gonna move there. Like I think it's so beautiful for
kids to just have freedom and to explore their own
decisions and make their mistakes and all, like anyway, whatever
I could, Yeah, agreed. Tell us about Essie. What's she
(07:02):
into these days? I know she's your little mini me.
I love my son, He's I know you do. I
know I love him. He's also a little pain in
the butt sometimes, But I love aren't they all? Aren't
they all my daughter I want? But I love her more.
I'm not saying that. I'm saying there's something so unique
about that for me that, like mother Bond, I see
(07:26):
so much of myself and her when she either responds
a specific way or she has a certain emotion, I
can feel like because I'm like, that's how I would feel. Yeah, yeah,
I feel like I understand her and can connect to her,
and I feel like she's just kind of a minime,
and she is a minime, she is, for sure. I
(07:49):
loved the little dancing video that you guys did side
by side. I think I was watching it with someone,
and whoever was watching it with me was like, you
should have done that with Blakesley, like growing up. I
just I don't know, I just don't have time. And
it's fun, but um but I just never did it.
You need to continue to do that because it's really
cute to see, you know, and because you dance like
(08:12):
I just find that she's starting to show injury. I
never wanted to push it on her because but I
wanted her to kind of like come into her own
and she explored soccer and you know, yeah, but she's
she likes something very exciting. I mean, Miami is such
a great place for her because, oh my god, there
(08:34):
are so many studios, so many studios. You are dialed
in in Miami. If she wants to dance that's so
exciting as a dance mom myself. Yes, I know yours.
We are I I love it. I just and we're
boy first girl second. You know so many you know
(08:56):
so many things. We look alike. We love our daughters. No, actually,
I actually, you know. It's really funny. I remember this
is several years ago because one of the kids, I'm
assuming it was Assy, was still I think it was
still in diapers, and there was this video that you
put on, like a video that you put on Instagram.
I sound like I'm even older than I really am.
(09:19):
It was like a real that you made and I'll
never forget it. But you like you made up some
song and I think it might have been JP At
the time, I caught you singing this song. Oh my god,
was so adorable, and it's just just flashed in my
head and I remember like catching myself singing that song
that you basically wrote that day on your Instagram. Like
(09:40):
I'm like you, I can't remember what it is. I'm
gonna look it up later and I'm gonna find it.
I want to text it too, because I remember thinking
how cute it was and I was like, oh my god,
I do that all the time. I'm always like making
up songs to you know, keep my kids kind of
engaged and all right. And I remember seeing that and
I was like, and it was at the time, and
I thought of this. The second I found out we're
gonna get to interview you, I remember thinking, I'm like,
that's it makes it actually so relatable. And white people
(10:01):
love you so much is because you would post these
things of you just being yourself, and you know, you
didn't care if you I mean, he looked obviously you
looked gorgeous at the time, but you didn't care if
you had makeup on or whatever. It's like, you know
a lot of people don't do that, right, A lot
of people, I think, are you know, basically have a
professional film crew following around twenty four seven and I
just love it. Remember my wife, I'm talking about it,
(10:24):
That's true. I remember my wife and I talked about it.
I was like, that is awesome. We would be such
great friends with Ashley if we live near her. Well,
you know, I try to be cool and normal. They
can do they do? They know about the show? The kids? Yeah, yeah,
they do, they do. Actually, there's a really funny video
(10:45):
of my daughter because about a year ago. I think
they've tried. They figured it out a year ago, I
would say. And they're how old right now? So he
four it is eight and say six, So they've always known.
But I just don't think they've never watched this show.
So they don't understand the complexity. They don't understand that
maybe people recognize them, you know, at school or some
(11:07):
of the teachers might like, you know, be you know,
like the girl Yeah, see, like filmed herself on my
phone one day. She's like, she's sitting there and she
goes on, I'm going to re enact because it was
just she's like, you know, she was recording herself, like
as if she was a YouTuber. Okay, everybody knows us,
(11:31):
and I don't know if we're famous or rich. I
don't know which, either of those. But you know, so
they don't will they don't care. They don't know. If
(11:51):
they don't care, they're too young, you know, like maybe
they're teenagers, they'll think it's cool, but no, like too young. Yeah,
if it's on the air and it's I got you know,
a resurgence of ratings, they well, but right now yeah, yeah,
you don't actually and you trist I's hear me say
this story times, but I love it. So we're doing
something together, and um, here's why we know that they
(12:13):
won't think it's cool when they're teenagers. Trists like Max, oh,
I want you to meet my ex boyfriend Bob, and
he goes it's uh yeah, he's just like okay, whatever.
Its just and I'm like, ain't good to see a
man that phase of like they're too cool. So maybe
(12:34):
they won't care for sure. I mean, you never know.
I can't say, of course you know they won't care.
But I just feel like it is exciting for you know,
every so often if one of their friends recognizes or
one of their friends parents recognizes, then they're you know,
kind of get a little ego boost and they're like, oh,
I'm cool, my parents are cool. And then it just
(12:56):
goes away and it becomes like cringey, you know, exactly.
Just always. I just feel living in Miami the Bachelor
Bachelotte world, it's so not in my life, like right,
living in la or living in New York where people
watch it. In Miami, I don't know if I'm just
(13:18):
making a generalization, like nobody knows me here. I walk around,
I mean, I look a little different, but I walk
around like I never get recognized. Really, really do you
get recognized when you travel? Yeah? More, Yeah, if I'm
at an airport or am I saying in a different
city on vacation, like people were recognizing but Miami, I
(13:39):
think it's maybe it's just a different culture. They're not
they don't really, Yeah, that's true. It's a theory I have.
I feel like the Midwest is a big hub like Texas.
I don't know about Michigan, Bob, you can speak to that,
but I feel like and I went back to Saint
Louis got recognized a couple of times, Like I feel
like Texas is a big hub misable right the first
(14:02):
body watching, everybody knew you like everyone was. I don't know.
I just feel like you're way more recognizable the godmother
of the godmother and saying grand I say, you're the
godmother of the grandfather of the franchise. I think as
Michigan's my you know, my home state, and I filmed
(14:25):
all the stuff here and all that kind of stuff.
I think that's why probably Michigan for me is a lot,
But I got a lot in Seattle too. But you
know it's really weird as you're right in Florida unless
I'm at the airport, I can say honestly, and I
was just in Orlando for the better part of a week.
I pretty much moved through that place, you know, with
great anonymity. It was nice. Yeah, yeah, totally. Do you
(14:57):
still watch the show, Ashley, Bachelor, Bachelort in Paradise, any
of it? So? First off, Bachelor in Paradise this last
season was so good. I love you no, right, I
know same? Um, I watch it, okay, so I have
you know, obviously JP and I are divorced, so we
share custody. So every other Monday, when I don't have
(15:18):
the kids, I watch it, But if I have them,
I'm usually like packing, like, yeah, I'm tiring. You don't
have the Bachelor in Paradise in the background. Paradise, excuse
me to excuse me, kids, I need to listen to
this lokated to Bachelor in Paradise. I wouldn't report it.
With Bachelor, I'm kind of like every other week I'll
(15:39):
up don't because I know nobody used me same same. No,
you know you guys are both I'm sure way better
watchers than I am. Because I literally go on these
little things where we do the iHeart stuff and I'm like, Hi,
what's your name? Oh on Clayton, I was just a
bachel me like, but yeah, we're curious about that because
(16:05):
I mean, so you mentioned about you and JP, so
you know, it's kind of interesting because I was curious,
Like I had a question. I was wondering, do you
guys both live in Miami area then? Or did he?
Because I remember I wasn't sure what the timing of things,
you know, kind of was on that. So we moved
to Miami from New York together right when I was
in my son or our son, and we lived here
(16:28):
for what six years, and then we lived together obviously,
and then we divorced, but we both stayed in Miami.
We just live in different parts of Miami, but we're
always ten away. So it's very easy, and you know,
it's been actually pretty seamless in terms of like logistics,
like we're both very dedicated to them and bringing them
(16:51):
to all their dreams and practices. Yeah, you know, I
better have a good relationship if you're going to do
all that together. So it's hard, it's hard. I have
a friend going through right now and if you don't
have a co parent who's as dedicated as you are, yeah, oh,
all that responsibility on you or yell. So, you know,
(17:11):
it was kind of interesting because when I got married
after the Bachelor, of course, but not to anyone from
the show, and we were both in the public eye,
and when we split up, it was so hard, and
I remember thinking, you know, if I wasn't the Bachelor guy,
they wouldn't care, right, And then to be in the
situation that you guys were in, which was the couple
that was formed on the show, to go through that divorce,
(17:32):
that had to be so much pressure, I would imagine
from you know, the outside looking in, was it was.
It had to be other than I know it was
difficult just in and of itself. I know, you guys
actually loved and cared about each other so much, and
I know how hard that can be. But that had
to be a lot to navigate. Yeah, I think there
were a lot of different layers to it, right, So
being in the public eye, certainly it didn't keep us
(17:54):
together and didn't tear us apart. I think that it
put pressure on us to really, like first off, stay
private about everything like we were ever about anything until
we were certain, um, And then I think it does
in a way put a little more pressure on you
to like try, try, try as much as you can, right,
(18:15):
I don't I mean, I don't know if that's the
right answer, but that's and I don't know if JP
feels that way, but I certainly felt like, man, I
want to make sure that we're making the right decision
for my kids. And then also I do subconsciously there's
a party, it's like I'm gonna let down, and I'm
kind of like a people pleaser, like I look to
people right that That's that I could talk a whole
(18:37):
hour about um. But when you're a people pleaser, you
you think more about how it'll affect other people versus yourself. Right,
So I in many years thinking that, you know, like
into the decision when really it shouldn't, like the only
people that should matter are your family or your kids
and yourself. So yeah, that was challenging. But I have
(19:02):
to say the most surprising thing I could talk about
divorce so much because I have to tell you, guys,
when when we separate and we went public, the amount
of hate I WoT on my social media, sure men,
was mind blowing, like the messages. I mean I could
(19:24):
go back and probably look, yeah, that's something that really
was like, Wow, nothing happened. We didn't teat there was
no one fidelity we we I truly feel like we
handled our divorce the best that we could and probably
that anyone could. Like we really put the kids first.
We made decisions based on the kids what we felt
(19:45):
was their well being. We treat each treat each other fairly,
I felt. So it was really hard to read all
those messages. I remember asking JP like, hey, do you
get I remember texting, hey, I'm getting like messages from people.
Do you get anything? He's like nope, really interesting, real
wait a second, So all the hate was going to you,
(20:07):
like everyone thought separated your family, like it was like
I I was the one that did you know nobody?
Do you think it's because you're a mom and that's why,
like people put this onus on the mom to like
make sure your kids are first. Do you think that's why? Like,
looking back, I'm really not sure if I have a theory.
(20:29):
I actually do because I went through it too, And
I think you go through it because you know you're
on this show that basically you had, and I mean
people would say this to me, and I remember thinking
to myself, Oh my god, if they only knew how
the stuff works. But they like, you had thirty guys
that she was from and you still couldn't make it work.
And I when I when Estella and I didn't work out,
(20:50):
so I can only imagine for you actually, But then
when my when my wife and I split up, at
the time my ex wife and I split up, I
remember people were like, you know, oh, they just did
it for the fame they did. It's like, uh, you know,
a lot to go through to try and get you know, Instagram.
I wasn't even around when I was like, I'm like, oh,
when I try to get like, uh my Space followers,
what was I doing this for? You know? Yeah? Yeah.
(21:12):
But I remember thinking to myself, God, it's so pointed, like,
and it was all about the fact that you know,
you were this person, you had this choice to make,
and you still mess it up. How is that possible?
You know? Absolutely? And I actually never thought of it,
but I feel like that that's a that's a really
good theory. But it's funny because I always joke around
with people, like my kids took my our divorce much
(21:34):
better than half of America, Like the divorced with such
grace and they still and I do appreciation and maturity.
My daughter was four, Ford was actually maybe she was
she was foreign. I think he was about to be sick.
(21:55):
I'm trying to think maybe five. But heat when you
when I when we sat in the kitchen and Jake
is like, I can't do it. You have to do it. Really,
when this was before it was happening or during was
this was right, but when we had need the decision,
we're coming open. Yeah, We're sitting in the kitchen and
(22:16):
JP's sitting at the sync and I'm sitting here, and
Ford's there, and SE's there. Es he's young, so I
don't know how much the others stood at the time. Yeah,
never forget. We explained it, you know, like we consulted
with a child psychologist to see how the best way
to present the information was right appropriately for their age.
So when we um, we explained to him in kids turns,
(22:37):
you know, like how people you know when they love
each other and what you do you know, marriage and
then when um, you know, like things don't work out
and you're not being nice kind to each other anymore,
you know whatever. We explained it and that that's what
was happening with us, that we weren't making each other
happy anymore, we weren't being as kind as we wanted
to be our relationship. You know. We're just talking about that.
(22:59):
And you know, he said, he looks, said, I understand,
and I'm okay with it. And I said, so, I
said it again and again and he said, no, Mom,
I get it. I'm okay with it. Understand. You know,
it was really that's a lot of emotional intelligence for
(23:22):
a little kid, you know what I mean. It was,
and they still have been super well adjusted, super you know.
And I think we try to sometimes protect kids from
the world, but know, everybody, divorce is happening. It doesn't
have to be a bad thing. We don't have to
force people to be in a place that's not you know,
(23:43):
working for them anymore. Your kids in a relationship that's
not you know, like just working for everybody. And I
think if you handle it well and you present it well, yeah,
more kids not only will they understand and accept, but
they will flourish. Like I seeing my kids flourish. I
don't know, it's just it's Yeah, you guys are both
(24:07):
such kind and good people. It's like it sounds like
if it has to happen, I mean, you know the
way you handled it. I mean I probably couldn't have
been handled any better. I'm sure. Yeah, I mean we're
not perfect, but I feel like we really did a
pretty good job. Yeah, yeah, it seems like it. So
do you feel like Ford was able to process it
(24:29):
because he saw the way you guys were treating each other.
So that's what everybody, you know, if I ever tell
that story, that's pretty much what the tailor day they observed.
And kids are very smart, So maybe the answer is yes.
But one thing about JP and I is like we're
not fighters, Like we're behind closed doors. We just would
(24:50):
have conversations and it would be tense, but we were
never like me. Yeah, no, I totally get that mentioned too.
There's a possibility about you know that you're right about that.
Maybe he sensed it, Yeah, because I feel like when
Ryan and I argue we're not fighters either, Like, especially
in front of the kids. If we're going to have
(25:11):
a conversation and we know it's going to be you know,
it's going to get heated a little bit. Then we'll
make sure we're private in a bathroom with the door
closed and the fan on or something. You know. Um,
but I feel like anytime I wear it on my face,
like you can see if I'm upset on my face,
Like Blakesley especially is very part of me in tune
(25:34):
with that, and she'll be like, Mom, are you okay? Mom?
What's right? Like? Mom, are you okay? Um? Yeah, yeah,
I get it. I think they can sense that you're right,
like kids just sense what's going on. So maybe he
understood that. I remember when my parents got divorced and
they sat me down and you know the same thing.
(25:56):
You know, we're It's just it's better for everybody involved.
And I think you're right, Like, divorce happens, and you
can still live a happy life after divorce. And obviously
it was an incredible thing that you and JP met
on the show and were able to have, you know,
these two beautiful kids and they have a super happy life.
(26:19):
It seems like so you know, I am all. I
am always of the belief that everything happens for a reason.
And I don't know if you feel that way, but
I you know, like I don't failure. People are like
oh it's a failure and success stories yeah, well does
not mean you're still together like that to get out
(26:40):
of our heads, because the success story is spending time
with someone that brings out the best in you, somebody
that teaches you things about life, somebody that you know
creates another life with you like that success. So I
threw story. Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say you're a
success ready for Florida and see, you know what it's
(27:01):
like that in and of itself, those two beautiful kids
who are just having a blast and you know, enjoying
their life and at the beach while my kids are
fighting off an ice storm. You know, my kids I
think would feel like much more successful if they were
hanging out in Miami right now. Hemmy everybody else's not
(27:23):
as well, right, But so much has happened to you
recently too. Now you obviously moved to Miami, but then
you start your own business, you start your own practice
and go next level there too. So that's going to
be exciting, very exciting. So that has been so I. Yeah.
So I worked as a pediatric dentist here in Miami
for almost seven years at an office and then I
(27:43):
decided to open up my own office, and it has been,
first off, such a blessing, the greatest blessing of my
life really, besides the kids obviously, but yeah, right, really right, yeah,
you got it, yes, but just such a great blessing.
It's taught me so much. Being a business owner is
(28:07):
very challenging, and there's a lot more. You know, it's
very stressful because I'm a perfectionist, so I like everything
to be perfect, everything to be running a specific way. Everything, Like,
I'm very hands on. I'm very hands on a perfection
So that's been the most challenging part is just being
able to control my obsession with perfection. I hear that.
(28:34):
But it's been I mean, it's been a blessing. I'm
so happy that I First off, I'm happy that I
was able to open up my own office because not
everybody is able to. So so yeah, it's been great.
It's been awesome. Question always texts me, call me whatever.
Here's Oh my gosh, Actually I do I mean, seriously,
(28:54):
I don't know. Okay, what is the one tip to
get your kids to brush their teeth? Motivation is very hard, right,
I think that's the most challenging thing. So, first off,
for kids, for people that have little kids is to
spit them off early and be very consistent with the
brushing in their routine. Well, they're especially just to your
(29:19):
kids kids ages, it's more challenging, but I think it's
all about first off, reminding them right, making access to
the supply is easy, and all about routine. It's all
about routine, Like kids love routine. I don't know if
your kids do specific things every night, mind do in
a specific order and brushing in there so as we
(29:41):
can as they get older, I'm just going to continue that.
Sure things can change, the order can change, but for
my kids, it's a non negotiable, Like it's a non negotiable.
They have to brush, they have to philosophy times a week,
like at nine time, absolutely morning and night. Like I'm
kind of crazy about that. It's like taking a shower. Yeah,
(30:01):
I think enforcing it, reminding, making as access easy, and
trying to be really consistent and regimented with them. Yeah.
So I have a specific one. So I have a
four year old who I got it pretty good with
(30:22):
the brushing. I used a little pop patrol, the little
pop Patrol battery operating toothbrush. But is it too early
to flow, and he's never too early to floss, right.
I can't get him to do the floss, so I
do the little tooth picky thingis yeah, okay, okay. So
let me tell you so, usually kids under the age
of four, all of their teeth are spaced out. There's
(30:45):
a space in between all their teeth where the toothbrush
reaches in there. So honestly, technically you don't have to
at that point. But at the age of four, the
back two molars in all four corners of the mouth
they start to touch. That's just developed. The adult teothy're
pushing in pushing forward, so they push them together. As
soon as they're touching, you need to floss in there,
(31:06):
so check it's the back four. If anything touching in
the front, I would flos in there too. I love
the little floss sticks, but you have to do it
for them because at four they just don't have that
deck stery. They can probably do it. Yeah, you really
do need to do the back and what I recommend
doing is dipping your floster in toothpaste and flossing the
(31:26):
toothpaste in between. Because toothpaste has something that they have
to bacterial. It helps a strengthen in between your teeth
and believe it or not, that's where kids in my experience,
especially like six, seven, eight years old, get cavities. It's
in between those baby molars. Yes, I love you at it.
Thank you. I have never heard that before. Love it.
(31:49):
We're doing We're going crazy. We're helping people, helping people
want tooth at a time. Here, I you need guys, anything, Okay, Well,
what I want to know is tell me about the
new love. Tell me about is it Yannie or is
that how you pronounce his name? Yeah, so I knew.
It's just that you're just waiting. You're like, I'm just waiting.
(32:11):
Scoop in there. Okay, this isn't fun. I mean to
know to know. So I love this story because it's
so funny. Okay, I get divorced. It's a year after JP,
a year and a few months after JP and I separate. Okay, Okay,
(32:34):
it's my birthday. My friend plans a dinner for me, okay.
Looking to make a reservation. She knows this guy from
from the hospital. He's a pharmaceutical ren so she knows him.
He's also kind of like a food influencer on the side,
so she kind of kind of big time. It iswallowing.
(32:57):
He's very dedicated to that. So anyway, so she's like, hey,
let me see if I can get he can help
me get a reservation or give recommendation. So they are
talking and whatever. He helps her get a reservation or
something as a thank you, like, hey, thanks for helping me.
Why don't you drop by at the dinner? It's me
and like nine girls. Yes, she's like where she's showing
(33:20):
me the guy, and I don't even think because I
look at him and I'm like, oh, like not really
doesn't seem like physically my type. I was not even
thinking there wasn't in that mindset at all, like at all. Yeah,
we're talking about hooking up with like hooking him up
maybe with one of our other friends who single. Like
we're just like whatever. So we're sitting at the table,
(33:41):
the night's almost over, and then I see this very handsome, tall,
beautiful man walking. I swear it was like slow motion,
like I've never had you just gave me too. That's
not the guy. That's not the guy. And he sits
down and I'm like and I look at my friend.
Why was I not in the running roo? I know
(34:06):
I knew divorce, but like, I don't get why you
didn't even think about Oh, Ashley, no, he's not your type,
like no, no, no, no, She's just like I never
would think of you with him, Like I never would.
So whatever, the night goes on. We finished dinner, we
go to the bar, most of the girls leave. There's
five drols that stick stick around four or five and
we're at the bar talking, drinking and we start, you know,
(34:30):
like maybe I was being a little bit of a flirt.
I don't know, and then that's this history we have
been together for like I guess April will be two years,
so almost that's amazing. I'm looking at his post right
now of like this incredible seafood ensemble and I'm like,
(34:52):
I just got to eat lunch today and I'm super
hungry right now. The funnies. I've never met someone that's
so dedicated to something like that. Like last night he
was over. He was posting from like seven thirty until
one in the morning. What Just like it's a lot
(35:15):
of work, Like people think, yeah it is, Yeah, it's fun,
but it's also a lot of work. And he's so
so dedicated to I love that. Yeah, he's got three
million followers. That doesn't happen by accident, you know, and
they're all authentic, Like he build it from one one followers.
(35:35):
That's amazing stuff. He's like authentically grew that account himself,
buying hand from one follower, So I think that's yeah.
I love it so on all the restaurants and all
the trips, that's amazing. I mean the trips, the trips
like old account couple, Italy trips here and there, right,
(35:58):
I remember Greece. Yeah, has to do it. Yeah, someone
has to do it, and someone has to go along.
I'll be your post one. I'll be sitting like by
cool eating my you know Glacamolean chip, having on and
he's like, You're like, but it's so fun. I really
(36:20):
it's It's been such a wonderful two years and I
can talk a lot. I could talk. I won't bore
you guys with this, but about like dating after marriage
is so interesting, Yeah, because you're going into a relationship
with a completely different perspective. I like what you're right,
Because when you're young, you're like, whant you get married
and don't have kids? What is he going to propose
(36:41):
going into a relationship without those types of expectations is
such a thing because you really get to enjoy the
moments and accept people who they are and the speed
that they want to work at, and it's like it's
so wonderful, it's really cool. It's really was he married
before he was actually for one year or around one year?
(37:04):
And is his wife still? Like? Are they they don't
have kids? Right, he doesn't have any kids. I'd be honest,
I know nothing about her, Like I don't really name. Yeah,
you don't know her name. I don't know her name.
I don't know anything because he's never told you or
because you just don't remember. I'm just like, I don't know.
(37:25):
Oh my god. It's different when you get divorced without kids.
I mean I can speak to this because I've done it,
and other than other than if you are going to
be moving in the same circles. Yeah, my ex wife
and I, you know, are still very friendly because we
have moved in a lot of the same circles. But
it's like, there really isn't a reason to stay connected
to that person other than you know what I mean.
(37:47):
With kids, there's definitely a reason. But when you don't
have children, it's like if you choose to, that's great,
but you know, right, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get that
because she's not like I don't know. I honestly don't know.
I've never even we've talked about it briefly, but like
I don't know, I don't even know her name. Like that,
(38:07):
I need crazy met. You don't need to let me
text him. I think that says a lot about the
confidence you have in your relationship, yet the type of
person to be like, well, I need to know all
of this and I need to be you know who's
texting you. It's like, no, that's why I could text
him and it's no big deal. You'd be like, oh,
you guys are really funny story though on that topic,
(38:27):
because I am very confident, Like that's one thing about
him is he makes me feel like he's not. This
is really I don't know. I explained this. He's the
type of guy he's not. He's not very woman focused,
Like I feel like he doesn't go out and like
look for women. Yeah, kind of to himself. And like
I once was at an event with him. I saw
this girl like kind of like looking at him, going
up to him, talking to him, and he just he
(38:49):
doesn't even like it was or is it. But it's
really funny. So I've always felt very confident. But when
we first started dating, he was on his phone all
the time in the middle of the night, and I'm
because he was doing the foodye stuff, yes, and I'm like,
like I did have questions at that time, like why
(39:12):
are is three in the morning and you're on like
look up and he's on his phone like kind of
turned it and I'm like like, is there something you
need to tell me? Just to light in your eyes
because I'm I'm posting, you know, And I'm don't really
sad because I would like think something was not all
the time you'd be like, no, I'm just posting. I'm
(39:34):
sorry about it. And that was funny because he's on
his phone all the time. So I was thinking like
maybe something but right, So, because both of you have
been divorced, have you thought about what are your thoughts
on marriage in the future. Okay, So when I first
got divorced, I was like, no, I'll never get married
(39:54):
again because I don't have to really. Yeah, totally, we
didn't feel like it didn't makes sense for me. I
think with having kids already and like having a business
and like maybe more assets, Like I felt like it
was going to be complicated, okay, But so I was
very like, oh, I'll never get married again, Noah, girl powers,
sing over whatever whatever in a relationship. And people didn't
(40:19):
agree with me. But I understand because I think people
when they're in a relationship, they want that commitment. It's
not so much about the marriage, but they want that
level of commitment. So for me, I don't want to
get married as long as we're both at the same
level of commitment for now, I think I'm very happy
with as long as we stay committed and you know,
(40:41):
things are going well. I don't think that that'll ever change.
But yeah, you know, I mean I don't know. I
don't know. You're not opposed to it, which is nice,
and you're open to the relationship element, which is she's
opposed to look at that face I learn about marriage.
I feel like it's weird that, like the dad walks
the woman in down the aisle and then he gives
(41:02):
the woman to the man. It feels uncome So yeah,
my personal opinion, I don't need a man panting, like
going from one man to another man, Like I'm all
set that I like them all set. I'm all set.
I respect everybody's beliefs totally, culture and tradition. It just
(41:25):
is probably not for me. Yeah, I hear that, so
would you. Well, I guess it doesn't even matter. I'm
not even gonna ask it. But I feel like when
I got married, the tradition part was really important to me.
And you're right, like after we got married, I still
have this regret that I didn't involve my mom as
(41:45):
much because of the tradition. So, like you know, like
you said, it's tradition for the dad to walk the
bride down the aisle, and I had my dad do that,
and then I had my dad gave like the speech
at the reception and my mom and I. I mean
when my parents divorced in fifth grade, so I lived
(42:07):
with my mom, so I saw my dad like every
other weekend. Um. But I mean, I for I was
really being raised by my mom, you know, just because
we lived together. And I really it's a big regret
of mine to not have involved my mom as much.
So I get that. I totally understand. Every time I
(42:28):
got married, I did it better and better. It's like
my last one. Every time I got married. I gotta
do it every show. Trista, No, I was gonna say,
I don't know your history. So you were married, divorced, remarried.
So here's my history in a nutshell. Everything comes back
to Trista basically for handing me. Hear this, she kicked
(42:53):
me to the curb, so im so. I actually so,
I was a well twenty three year old touring music.
I sent a record deal right on college and I
did the cliche she cliche thing where you marry a model, okay,
and we were married and divorced within a year because
I went on tour with Matchbox twenty as the opener,
and I basically by the time I came home, I
(43:15):
realized that I really wasn't married anymore. So that was awesome.
And then and then a few years later, I end
up on Tristmas season right, and then she, you know,
she rolled the dice with this Ryan character, and thankfully,
you know, because of me endorsing him, they worked out.
(43:36):
I actually really did. I think it's one of my
favorite memories of talking to Tristo about how much I
loved Ryan. But while I was still on the show,
pus um and then um, you know, but it was
one of those things where you know, that was just
such an awesome couple. And then I got married after
being on the show, and that one lasted it's like
six years, and then then we Splepp and now I've
been married every since. So yeah, so technically I should
(43:57):
have gotten annulment probably the first time, but um, I
was too busy traveling around and doing you know the history. Yeah,
so anyway, but I will say to what you were to.
My point three is why even brought that up. Was
my my wife and I got married in twenty sixteen,
and we got it right, you know, like our moms
(44:18):
were our flower girls. My dad was my best man. Yeah,
my sister was the matron of honor. My brother in
law was our reverend you know. Um, so it was
like we really kind of invested in the in those things. Yeah,
that's why I lost it. Yeah, so far, I'm just kidding.
(44:45):
I'm just kidding. I love you and Jess. You guys
were just fine. Thank you. You're all set, as Ashley says,
you're all yes, I'm all set. I'm all well, Ashley.
We I've loved having you hear me, especially, love you
so much. I just feel like whenever we get together,
(45:06):
I just I connect with you so so much. Anytime,
I just actually adore you. Thank you so much for
coming you, Tristo. I feel really connected to you. I
always have thanks for coming. Hopefully I get to see
you in a couple of days, so your schedule so
we can, Okay, I will than I. She is so sweet. Ah,
(45:32):
she's the best. Love her, like, definitely one of my favorite.
I hate that question, like who are your favorite Bachelor
Nation people, because I feel like they're all children, you know,
I can't pick a favorite, but she's definitely one of
my favorites. I mean, one of my favorite memories. We
did this thing in New York um for we TV Bridezillas.
(45:54):
They used to have a show called Bridezillas and it
was me, Yeah, me and her and Dez and Dianna
and I will never forget. We were at this bar
and they started playing um like a Bruno Mars song Finesse,
and we were just in the It seemed like it
was like a like a pub. It wasn't like a club,
it was like a pub. And we were just like
(46:15):
We're just going to get out there and dance. And
one of my favorite memories. Well, especially you being so
like such good dancers. I can only imagine you probably
had some routines in common you'd throw out there in
the dais right. Oh. The thing is, I don't remember
stuff like I literally started learning these routines for this
weekend two days ago, and I Bob, I, I'm so old.
(46:38):
I go to bed like so sort of like rickety,
like my neck is killing me. I know, yeah, Blakeslee
should probably take a video. I'm sure Blakesley will be there.
I don't know, because she came to like the dance
studio that I'm rehearsing at, and she was a lively me.
(47:00):
I'm like, pleasly, Grace, you cannot laugh at your mother
back of the day, I could do this move right now.
I'm gonna take a slower row, like when I do
exercises at home, and they're like for those of you
who can't keep up, you know, I'm like, that's me
because I cannot keep up what I need to totally
all right, Thanks Bob, Thanks everybody, good right, everybody
This is the almost famous podcast with iHeart Radio. Hi Bob,
how are you? Hi, Trista, I'm fantastic. How are you today?
I'm doing okay even though it's a blizzard outside, but
you know, yeah, that's Colorado for you, at least in
slight and fluffy snow like I think powder when I
think of Colorado. When I think of Michigan stell lately,
(00:21):
I think of like an ice, like black ice. Yeah. Well,
one thing to brighten our day is the fact that
we both get to talk to Ashley today. I'm so excited.
I'm excited too. I can't wait to have her on
talk about an og, talk about Yeah, I'm excited. Hi
(00:46):
are hi? Beautiful Trista, I kind of feel like you
and I look at like a little bit like maybe. Yeah,
so seriously, I feel like when You're a Bachelor and
Bachelorette came out, so many people wrote me saying that
we were twins. Oh yeah, so many people. And I
take it as a huge compliment obviously, but yes, I've
(01:07):
always thought we look alike. I feel yes, it's like
maybe the shape of horse name, I don't know, and
we're just teeny, just teeny little pocket size mind size people.
I love it. How are you? Ye? Work great? How
(01:28):
are you? I'm so excited. So Bob doesn't know this,
but I am going to Miami tomorrow, Bob with Blakeslee
because we're having a Miami Dancer alumni reunion. Oh my gosh,
how I mean, I'm so freaking nervous because I'm going
to be dancing on the court at halftime at the
next game. But yes, I know. Actually I'm done. I'm done.
(01:52):
But I'm beautiful too. It's like summer's coming. You can
feel it. The sun's just PERI actually so excited to
not be in New York right now, given the way
the weather's hit in New York for so many years.
Like I feel like my childhood and my previous life
(02:12):
is like a lifetime ago. Yeah, I mean so, it's like, God,
I would never go back there. I mean, yeah, I
never You know something about Florida that's just so beautiful,
And I think it's important for people to just find
a place that makes them feel happy every day. Like
I walk up, I wake up in the morning, I
look outside. There's so much beauty, There's so much just
(02:34):
there's so much to be grateful for. And I feel
like once you find a place where, no matter what's
going on in your life, you can feel that way about.
It just brings me so much happiness. I know, it's
really important to me. So I love that. I like
hearing that too. That's very lovely. Well, the reason I
brought up the heat thing is because I might get
to see Ashley in person. I know, um, so hopefully
(02:58):
it works out, but if not, it's business schedule yours too.
You know, we're just busy, like non stop. Soccer and
dance and basketball. Are those the things? Soccer in basketball
for forty and he's a dancer, acro yes, tell us,
(03:23):
tell us all the things about the kiddos. Okay, so well,
you know Ford is very athletic. So Ford is a
lot of things. He's very athletic. He likes to move around,
he's very physical. He's tried every sport so and he's
really great at every sport. I have to say, amazing.
But and this is probably personality. When it gets a
(03:45):
little too intense for him, like too demanding, that's when
he pulls back and he wants to try something else.
Very interesting. It's very interesting. So he has an intense
like competitive or intense, like yeah, okay, got it. Time commitment, right,
So he made um like a competitive soccer league, Like
(04:06):
he tried out and he made it. But the practices
were like three times a week, and then there were
games every weekend sometimes both days. It was too much.
The kid just wanted to break because I just want
to go home. I don't want So that's a lot
for a young kid, you know, it really is. Oh yeah, absolutely,
And I feel like we run sometimes we won't maybe maybe,
(04:27):
And that's I'll speak for myself. Sometimes I feel like
we have to fill our kids' schedules with saving things.
To me, feel like we're amazing parents for doing all
these things for them and doing our rest with Bosom.
But also I think the kids need a freaking break. Yeah,
we're going through that right now. We have a four
year old and one and a half year old, and
(04:49):
our four year old like every day, my wife like
loves to have like activities every day, and you know,
the day I was like, I think he just wants
to like sit down and watch Bluey for like an hour,
you know, and we never let them watch I'm like,
let's just chill today, Like let's do not because I
think you're right. I think sometimes it's just like, I mean,
(05:09):
I know for a fact, growing up, I was bored
a lot, and there was nothing wrong with that, you know,
I was okay to not have anything to do. Basically, Yes, yeah, well,
I feel like as they get older, too, like their
schedules will just get worse and worse and more busy
and more busy. I mean, I've said this multiple times.
I feel like, even on the podcast, when my kids
were newborns, I felt like I couldn't be any more
(05:31):
busy because I was feeding them two hours and la la,
and now, oh it beats newborn stage, it beats all
the stages. It's just once they find what they love,
which is a fun process of figuring out what they love,
but finding out what they love and what they're okay
being committed to and then committing to that like, oh gosh,
(05:55):
it is it is crazy town. It is really. Yeah,
it's intense. So those moments of relaxation and just chilling out,
zoning out. Give the phone to them, give the iPad,
give the TV. I'm all for that. Yeah. The end
of the day, like when we're finished at work, when
I go home, I want to be brainless for a
little while, totally. Like once they get home from school
(06:19):
and they always do an activity every school at at
their school. When they get home, I don't demand that
they do their homework right away and get all their
reading done, get all that done. Yeah, allow them at
least an hour and a half sometimes two hours to
yea and their brain to make decisions about what they
(06:40):
want to do in these moments, Like these kids are
so regimented, and like they tell me you have to
go here, and then you gotta move here, and you're
gonna move there. Like I think it's so beautiful for
kids to just have freedom and to explore their own
decisions and make their mistakes and all, like anyway, whatever
I could, Yeah, agreed. Tell us about Essie. What's she
(07:02):
into these days? I know she's your little mini me.
I love my son, He's I know you do. I
know I love him. He's also a little pain in
the butt sometimes, But I love aren't they all? Aren't
they all my daughter I want? But I love her more.
I'm not saying that. I'm saying there's something so unique
about that for me that, like mother Bond, I see
(07:26):
so much of myself and her when she either responds
a specific way or she has a certain emotion, I
can feel like because I'm like, that's how I would feel. Yeah, yeah,
I feel like I understand her and can connect to her,
and I feel like she's just kind of a minime,
and she is a minime, she is, for sure. I
(07:49):
loved the little dancing video that you guys did side
by side. I think I was watching it with someone,
and whoever was watching it with me was like, you
should have done that with Blakesley, like growing up. I
just I don't know, I just don't have time. And
it's fun, but um but I just never did it.
You need to continue to do that because it's really
cute to see, you know, and because you dance like
(08:12):
I just find that she's starting to show injury. I
never wanted to push it on her because but I
wanted her to kind of like come into her own
and she explored soccer and you know, yeah, but she's
she likes something very exciting. I mean, Miami is such
a great place for her because, oh my god, there
(08:34):
are so many studios, so many studios. You are dialed
in in Miami. If she wants to dance that's so
exciting as a dance mom myself. Yes, I know yours.
We are I I love it. I just and we're
boy first girl second. You know so many you know
(08:56):
so many things. We look alike. We love our daughters. No, actually,
I actually, you know. It's really funny. I remember this
is several years ago because one of the kids, I'm
assuming it was Assy, was still I think it was
still in diapers, and there was this video that you
put on, like a video that you put on Instagram.
I sound like I'm even older than I really am.
(09:19):
It was like a real that you made and I'll
never forget it. But you like you made up some
song and I think it might have been JP At
the time, I caught you singing this song. Oh my god,
was so adorable, and it's just just flashed in my
head and I remember like catching myself singing that song
that you basically wrote that day on your Instagram. Like
(09:40):
I'm like you, I can't remember what it is. I'm
gonna look it up later and I'm gonna find it.
I want to text it too, because I remember thinking
how cute it was and I was like, oh my god,
I do that all the time. I'm always like making
up songs to you know, keep my kids kind of
engaged and all right. And I remember seeing that and
I was like, and it was at the time, and
I thought of this. The second I found out we're
gonna get to interview you, I remember thinking, I'm like,
that's it makes it actually so relatable. And white people
(10:01):
love you so much is because you would post these
things of you just being yourself, and you know, you
didn't care if you I mean, he looked obviously you
looked gorgeous at the time, but you didn't care if
you had makeup on or whatever. It's like, you know
a lot of people don't do that, right, A lot
of people, I think, are you know, basically have a
professional film crew following around twenty four seven and I
just love it. Remember my wife, I'm talking about it,
(10:24):
That's true. I remember my wife and I talked about it.
I was like, that is awesome. We would be such
great friends with Ashley if we live near her. Well,
you know, I try to be cool and normal. They
can do they do? They know about the show? The kids? Yeah, yeah,
they do, they do. Actually, there's a really funny video
(10:45):
of my daughter because about a year ago. I think
they've tried. They figured it out a year ago, I
would say. And they're how old right now? So he
four it is eight and say six, So they've always known.
But I just don't think they've never watched this show.
So they don't understand the complexity. They don't understand that
maybe people recognize them, you know, at school or some
(11:07):
of the teachers might like, you know, be you know,
like the girl Yeah, see, like filmed herself on my
phone one day. She's like, she's sitting there and she
goes on, I'm going to re enact because it was
just she's like, you know, she was recording herself, like
as if she was a YouTuber. Okay, everybody knows us,
(11:31):
and I don't know if we're famous or rich. I
don't know which, either of those. But you know, so
they don't will they don't care. They don't know. If
(11:51):
they don't care, they're too young, you know, like maybe
they're teenagers, they'll think it's cool, but no, like too young. Yeah,
if it's on the air and it's I got you know,
a resurgence of ratings, they well, but right now yeah, yeah,
you don't actually and you trist I's hear me say
this story times, but I love it. So we're doing
something together, and um, here's why we know that they
(12:13):
won't think it's cool when they're teenagers. Trists like Max, oh,
I want you to meet my ex boyfriend Bob, and
he goes it's uh yeah, he's just like okay, whatever.
Its just and I'm like, ain't good to see a
man that phase of like they're too cool. So maybe
(12:34):
they won't care for sure. I mean, you never know.
I can't say, of course you know they won't care.
But I just feel like it is exciting for you know,
every so often if one of their friends recognizes or
one of their friends parents recognizes, then they're you know,
kind of get a little ego boost and they're like, oh,
I'm cool, my parents are cool. And then it just
(12:56):
goes away and it becomes like cringey, you know, exactly.
Just always. I just feel living in Miami the Bachelor
Bachelotte world, it's so not in my life, like right,
living in la or living in New York where people
watch it. In Miami, I don't know if I'm just
(13:18):
making a generalization, like nobody knows me here. I walk around,
I mean, I look a little different, but I walk
around like I never get recognized. Really, really do you
get recognized when you travel? Yeah? More, Yeah, if I'm
at an airport or am I saying in a different
city on vacation, like people were recognizing but Miami, I
(13:39):
think it's maybe it's just a different culture. They're not
they don't really, Yeah, that's true. It's a theory I have.
I feel like the Midwest is a big hub like Texas.
I don't know about Michigan, Bob, you can speak to that,
but I feel like and I went back to Saint
Louis got recognized a couple of times, Like I feel
like Texas is a big hub misable right the first
(14:02):
body watching, everybody knew you like everyone was. I don't know.
I just feel like you're way more recognizable the godmother
of the godmother and saying grand I say, you're the
godmother of the grandfather of the franchise. I think as
Michigan's my you know, my home state, and I filmed
(14:25):
all the stuff here and all that kind of stuff.
I think that's why probably Michigan for me is a lot,
But I got a lot in Seattle too. But you
know it's really weird as you're right in Florida unless
I'm at the airport, I can say honestly, and I
was just in Orlando for the better part of a week.
I pretty much moved through that place, you know, with
great anonymity. It was nice. Yeah, yeah, totally. Do you
(14:57):
still watch the show, Ashley, Bachelor, Bachelort in Paradise, any
of it? So? First off, Bachelor in Paradise this last
season was so good. I love you no, right, I
know same? Um, I watch it, okay, so I have
you know, obviously JP and I are divorced, so we
share custody. So every other Monday, when I don't have
(15:18):
the kids, I watch it, But if I have them,
I'm usually like packing, like, yeah, I'm tiring. You don't
have the Bachelor in Paradise in the background. Paradise, excuse
me to excuse me, kids, I need to listen to
this lokated to Bachelor in Paradise. I wouldn't report it.
With Bachelor, I'm kind of like every other week I'll
(15:39):
up don't because I know nobody used me same same. No,
you know you guys are both I'm sure way better
watchers than I am. Because I literally go on these
little things where we do the iHeart stuff and I'm like, Hi,
what's your name? Oh on Clayton, I was just a
bachel me like, but yeah, we're curious about that because
(16:05):
I mean, so you mentioned about you and JP, so
you know, it's kind of interesting because I was curious,
Like I had a question. I was wondering, do you
guys both live in Miami area then? Or did he?
Because I remember I wasn't sure what the timing of things,
you know, kind of was on that. So we moved
to Miami from New York together right when I was
in my son or our son, and we lived here
(16:28):
for what six years, and then we lived together obviously,
and then we divorced, but we both stayed in Miami.
We just live in different parts of Miami, but we're
always ten away. So it's very easy, and you know,
it's been actually pretty seamless in terms of like logistics,
like we're both very dedicated to them and bringing them
(16:51):
to all their dreams and practices. Yeah, you know, I
better have a good relationship if you're going to do
all that together. So it's hard, it's hard. I have
a friend going through right now and if you don't
have a co parent who's as dedicated as you are, yeah, oh,
all that responsibility on you or yell. So, you know,
(17:11):
it was kind of interesting because when I got married
after the Bachelor, of course, but not to anyone from
the show, and we were both in the public eye,
and when we split up, it was so hard, and
I remember thinking, you know, if I wasn't the Bachelor guy,
they wouldn't care, right, And then to be in the
situation that you guys were in, which was the couple
that was formed on the show, to go through that divorce,
(17:32):
that had to be so much pressure, I would imagine
from you know, the outside looking in, was it was.
It had to be other than I know it was
difficult just in and of itself. I know, you guys
actually loved and cared about each other so much, and
I know how hard that can be. But that had
to be a lot to navigate. Yeah, I think there
were a lot of different layers to it, right, So
being in the public eye, certainly it didn't keep us
(17:54):
together and didn't tear us apart. I think that it
put pressure on us to really, like first off, stay
private about everything like we were ever about anything until
we were certain, um, And then I think it does
in a way put a little more pressure on you
to like try, try, try as much as you can, right,
(18:15):
I don't I mean, I don't know if that's the
right answer, but that's and I don't know if JP
feels that way, but I certainly felt like, man, I
want to make sure that we're making the right decision
for my kids. And then also I do subconsciously there's
a party, it's like I'm gonna let down, and I'm
kind of like a people pleaser, like I look to
people right that That's that I could talk a whole
(18:37):
hour about um. But when you're a people pleaser, you
you think more about how it'll affect other people versus yourself. Right,
So I in many years thinking that, you know, like
into the decision when really it shouldn't, like the only
people that should matter are your family or your kids
and yourself. So yeah, that was challenging. But I have
(19:02):
to say the most surprising thing I could talk about
divorce so much because I have to tell you, guys,
when when we separate and we went public, the amount
of hate I WoT on my social media, sure men,
was mind blowing, like the messages. I mean I could
(19:24):
go back and probably look, yeah, that's something that really
was like, Wow, nothing happened. We didn't teat there was
no one fidelity we we I truly feel like we
handled our divorce the best that we could and probably
that anyone could. Like we really put the kids first.
We made decisions based on the kids what we felt
(19:45):
was their well being. We treat each treat each other fairly,
I felt. So it was really hard to read all
those messages. I remember asking JP like, hey, do you
get I remember texting, hey, I'm getting like messages from people.
Do you get anything? He's like nope, really interesting, real
wait a second, So all the hate was going to you,
(20:07):
like everyone thought separated your family, like it was like
I I was the one that did you know nobody?
Do you think it's because you're a mom and that's why,
like people put this onus on the mom to like
make sure your kids are first. Do you think that's why? Like,
looking back, I'm really not sure if I have a theory.
(20:29):
I actually do because I went through it too, And
I think you go through it because you know you're
on this show that basically you had, and I mean
people would say this to me, and I remember thinking
to myself, Oh my god, if they only knew how
the stuff works. But they like, you had thirty guys
that she was from and you still couldn't make it work.
And I when I when Estella and I didn't work out,
(20:50):
so I can only imagine for you actually, But then
when my when my wife and I split up, at
the time my ex wife and I split up, I
remember people were like, you know, oh, they just did
it for the fame they did. It's like, uh, you know,
a lot to go through to try and get you know, Instagram.
I wasn't even around when I was like, I'm like, oh,
when I try to get like, uh my Space followers,
what was I doing this for? You know? Yeah? Yeah.
(21:12):
But I remember thinking to myself, God, it's so pointed, like,
and it was all about the fact that you know,
you were this person, you had this choice to make,
and you still mess it up. How is that possible?
You know? Absolutely? And I actually never thought of it,
but I feel like that that's a that's a really
good theory. But it's funny because I always joke around
with people, like my kids took my our divorce much
(21:34):
better than half of America, Like the divorced with such
grace and they still and I do appreciation and maturity.
My daughter was four, Ford was actually maybe she was
she was foreign. I think he was about to be sick.
(21:55):
I'm trying to think maybe five. But heat when you
when I when we sat in the kitchen and Jake
is like, I can't do it. You have to do it. Really,
when this was before it was happening or during was
this was right, but when we had need the decision,
we're coming open. Yeah, We're sitting in the kitchen and
(22:16):
JP's sitting at the sync and I'm sitting here, and
Ford's there, and SE's there. Es he's young, so I
don't know how much the others stood at the time. Yeah,
never forget. We explained it, you know, like we consulted
with a child psychologist to see how the best way
to present the information was right appropriately for their age.
So when we um, we explained to him in kids turns,
(22:37):
you know, like how people you know when they love
each other and what you do you know, marriage and
then when um, you know, like things don't work out
and you're not being nice kind to each other anymore,
you know whatever. We explained it and that that's what
was happening with us, that we weren't making each other
happy anymore, we weren't being as kind as we wanted
to be our relationship. You know. We're just talking about that.
(22:59):
And you know, he said, he looks, said, I understand,
and I'm okay with it. And I said, so, I
said it again and again and he said, no, Mom,
I get it. I'm okay with it. Understand. You know,
it was really that's a lot of emotional intelligence for
(23:22):
a little kid, you know what I mean. It was,
and they still have been super well adjusted, super you know.
And I think we try to sometimes protect kids from
the world, but know, everybody, divorce is happening. It doesn't
have to be a bad thing. We don't have to
force people to be in a place that's not you know,
(23:43):
working for them anymore. Your kids in a relationship that's
not you know, like just working for everybody. And I
think if you handle it well and you present it well, yeah,
more kids not only will they understand and accept, but
they will flourish. Like I seeing my kids flourish. I
don't know, it's just it's Yeah, you guys are both
(24:07):
such kind and good people. It's like it sounds like
if it has to happen, I mean, you know the
way you handled it. I mean I probably couldn't have
been handled any better. I'm sure. Yeah, I mean we're
not perfect, but I feel like we really did a
pretty good job. Yeah, yeah, it seems like it. So
do you feel like Ford was able to process it
(24:29):
because he saw the way you guys were treating each other.
So that's what everybody, you know, if I ever tell
that story, that's pretty much what the tailor day they observed.
And kids are very smart, So maybe the answer is yes.
But one thing about JP and I is like we're
not fighters, Like we're behind closed doors. We just would
(24:50):
have conversations and it would be tense, but we were
never like me. Yeah, no, I totally get that mentioned too.
There's a possibility about you know that you're right about that.
Maybe he sensed it, Yeah, because I feel like when
Ryan and I argue we're not fighters either, Like, especially
in front of the kids. If we're going to have
(25:11):
a conversation and we know it's going to be you know,
it's going to get heated a little bit. Then we'll
make sure we're private in a bathroom with the door
closed and the fan on or something. You know. Um,
but I feel like anytime I wear it on my face,
like you can see if I'm upset on my face,
Like Blakesley especially is very part of me in tune
(25:34):
with that, and she'll be like, Mom, are you okay? Mom?
What's right? Like? Mom, are you okay? Um? Yeah, yeah,
I get it. I think they can sense that you're right,
like kids just sense what's going on. So maybe he
understood that. I remember when my parents got divorced and
they sat me down and you know the same thing.
(25:56):
You know, we're It's just it's better for everybody involved.
And I think you're right, Like, divorce happens, and you
can still live a happy life after divorce. And obviously
it was an incredible thing that you and JP met
on the show and were able to have, you know,
these two beautiful kids and they have a super happy life.
(26:19):
It seems like so you know, I am all. I
am always of the belief that everything happens for a reason.
And I don't know if you feel that way, but
I you know, like I don't failure. People are like
oh it's a failure and success stories yeah, well does
not mean you're still together like that to get out
(26:40):
of our heads, because the success story is spending time
with someone that brings out the best in you, somebody
that teaches you things about life, somebody that you know
creates another life with you like that success. So I
threw story. Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say you're a
success ready for Florida and see, you know what it's
(27:01):
like that in and of itself, those two beautiful kids
who are just having a blast and you know, enjoying
their life and at the beach while my kids are
fighting off an ice storm. You know, my kids I
think would feel like much more successful if they were
hanging out in Miami right now. Hemmy everybody else's not
(27:23):
as well, right, But so much has happened to you
recently too. Now you obviously moved to Miami, but then
you start your own business, you start your own practice
and go next level there too. So that's going to
be exciting, very exciting. So that has been so I. Yeah.
So I worked as a pediatric dentist here in Miami
for almost seven years at an office and then I
(27:43):
decided to open up my own office, and it has been,
first off, such a blessing, the greatest blessing of my
life really, besides the kids obviously, but yeah, right, really right, yeah,
you got it, yes, but just such a great blessing.
It's taught me so much. Being a business owner is
(28:07):
very challenging, and there's a lot more. You know, it's
very stressful because I'm a perfectionist, so I like everything
to be perfect, everything to be running a specific way. Everything, Like,
I'm very hands on. I'm very hands on a perfection
So that's been the most challenging part is just being
able to control my obsession with perfection. I hear that.
(28:34):
But it's been I mean, it's been a blessing. I'm
so happy that I First off, I'm happy that I
was able to open up my own office because not
everybody is able to. So so yeah, it's been great.
It's been awesome. Question always texts me, call me whatever.
Here's Oh my gosh, Actually I do I mean, seriously,
(28:54):
I don't know. Okay, what is the one tip to
get your kids to brush their teeth? Motivation is very hard, right,
I think that's the most challenging thing. So, first off,
for kids, for people that have little kids is to
spit them off early and be very consistent with the
brushing in their routine. Well, they're especially just to your
(29:19):
kids kids ages, it's more challenging, but I think it's
all about first off, reminding them right, making access to
the supply is easy, and all about routine. It's all
about routine, Like kids love routine. I don't know if
your kids do specific things every night, mind do in
a specific order and brushing in there so as we
(29:41):
can as they get older, I'm just going to continue that.
Sure things can change, the order can change, but for
my kids, it's a non negotiable, Like it's a non negotiable.
They have to brush, they have to philosophy times a week,
like at nine time, absolutely morning and night. Like I'm
kind of crazy about that. It's like taking a shower. Yeah,
(30:01):
I think enforcing it, reminding, making as access easy, and
trying to be really consistent and regimented with them. Yeah.
So I have a specific one. So I have a
four year old who I got it pretty good with
(30:22):
the brushing. I used a little pop patrol, the little
pop Patrol battery operating toothbrush. But is it too early
to flow, and he's never too early to floss, right.
I can't get him to do the floss, so I
do the little tooth picky thingis yeah, okay, okay. So
let me tell you so, usually kids under the age
of four, all of their teeth are spaced out. There's
(30:45):
a space in between all their teeth where the toothbrush
reaches in there. So honestly, technically you don't have to
at that point. But at the age of four, the
back two molars in all four corners of the mouth
they start to touch. That's just developed. The adult teothy're
pushing in pushing forward, so they push them together. As
soon as they're touching, you need to floss in there,
(31:06):
so check it's the back four. If anything touching in
the front, I would flos in there too. I love
the little floss sticks, but you have to do it
for them because at four they just don't have that
deck stery. They can probably do it. Yeah, you really
do need to do the back and what I recommend
doing is dipping your floster in toothpaste and flossing the
(31:26):
toothpaste in between. Because toothpaste has something that they have
to bacterial. It helps a strengthen in between your teeth
and believe it or not, that's where kids in my experience,
especially like six, seven, eight years old, get cavities. It's
in between those baby molars. Yes, I love you at it.
Thank you. I have never heard that before. Love it.
(31:49):
We're doing We're going crazy. We're helping people, helping people
want tooth at a time. Here, I you need guys, anything, Okay, Well,
what I want to know is tell me about the
new love. Tell me about is it Yannie or is
that how you pronounce his name? Yeah, so I knew.
It's just that you're just waiting. You're like, I'm just waiting.
(32:11):
Scoop in there. Okay, this isn't fun. I mean to
know to know. So I love this story because it's
so funny. Okay, I get divorced. It's a year after JP,
a year and a few months after JP and I separate. Okay, Okay,
(32:34):
it's my birthday. My friend plans a dinner for me, okay.
Looking to make a reservation. She knows this guy from
from the hospital. He's a pharmaceutical ren so she knows him.
He's also kind of like a food influencer on the side,
so she kind of kind of big time. It iswallowing.
(32:57):
He's very dedicated to that. So anyway, so she's like, hey,
let me see if I can get he can help
me get a reservation or give recommendation. So they are
talking and whatever. He helps her get a reservation or
something as a thank you, like, hey, thanks for helping me.
Why don't you drop by at the dinner? It's me
and like nine girls. Yes, she's like where she's showing
(33:20):
me the guy, and I don't even think because I
look at him and I'm like, oh, like not really
doesn't seem like physically my type. I was not even
thinking there wasn't in that mindset at all, like at all. Yeah,
we're talking about hooking up with like hooking him up
maybe with one of our other friends who single. Like
we're just like whatever. So we're sitting at the table,
(33:41):
the night's almost over, and then I see this very handsome, tall,
beautiful man walking. I swear it was like slow motion,
like I've never had you just gave me too. That's
not the guy. That's not the guy. And he sits
down and I'm like and I look at my friend.
Why was I not in the running roo? I know
(34:06):
I knew divorce, but like, I don't get why you
didn't even think about Oh, Ashley, no, he's not your type,
like no, no, no, no, She's just like I never
would think of you with him, Like I never would.
So whatever, the night goes on. We finished dinner, we
go to the bar, most of the girls leave. There's
five drols that stick stick around four or five and
we're at the bar talking, drinking and we start, you know,
(34:30):
like maybe I was being a little bit of a flirt.
I don't know, and then that's this history we have
been together for like I guess April will be two years,
so almost that's amazing. I'm looking at his post right
now of like this incredible seafood ensemble and I'm like,
(34:52):
I just got to eat lunch today and I'm super
hungry right now. The funnies. I've never met someone that's
so dedicated to something like that. Like last night he
was over. He was posting from like seven thirty until
one in the morning. What Just like it's a lot
(35:15):
of work, Like people think, yeah it is, Yeah, it's fun,
but it's also a lot of work. And he's so
so dedicated to I love that. Yeah, he's got three
million followers. That doesn't happen by accident, you know, and
they're all authentic, Like he build it from one one followers.
(35:35):
That's amazing stuff. He's like authentically grew that account himself,
buying hand from one follower, So I think that's yeah.
I love it so on all the restaurants and all
the trips, that's amazing. I mean the trips, the trips
like old account couple, Italy trips here and there, right,
(35:58):
I remember Greece. Yeah, has to do it. Yeah, someone
has to do it, and someone has to go along.
I'll be your post one. I'll be sitting like by
cool eating my you know Glacamolean chip, having on and
he's like, You're like, but it's so fun. I really
(36:20):
it's It's been such a wonderful two years and I
can talk a lot. I could talk. I won't bore
you guys with this, but about like dating after marriage
is so interesting, Yeah, because you're going into a relationship
with a completely different perspective. I like what you're right,
Because when you're young, you're like, whant you get married
and don't have kids? What is he going to propose
(36:41):
going into a relationship without those types of expectations is
such a thing because you really get to enjoy the
moments and accept people who they are and the speed
that they want to work at, and it's like it's
so wonderful, it's really cool. It's really was he married
before he was actually for one year or around one year?
(37:04):
And is his wife still? Like? Are they they don't
have kids? Right, he doesn't have any kids. I'd be honest,
I know nothing about her, Like I don't really name. Yeah,
you don't know her name. I don't know her name.
I don't know anything because he's never told you or
because you just don't remember. I'm just like, I don't know.
(37:25):
Oh my god. It's different when you get divorced without kids.
I mean I can speak to this because I've done it,
and other than other than if you are going to
be moving in the same circles. Yeah, my ex wife
and I, you know, are still very friendly because we
have moved in a lot of the same circles. But
it's like, there really isn't a reason to stay connected
to that person other than you know what I mean.
(37:47):
With kids, there's definitely a reason. But when you don't
have children, it's like if you choose to, that's great,
but you know, right, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get that
because she's not like I don't know. I honestly don't know.
I've never even we've talked about it briefly, but like
I don't know, I don't even know her name. Like that,
(38:07):
I need crazy met. You don't need to let me
text him. I think that says a lot about the
confidence you have in your relationship, yet the type of
person to be like, well, I need to know all
of this and I need to be you know who's
texting you. It's like, no, that's why I could text
him and it's no big deal. You'd be like, oh,
you guys are really funny story though on that topic,
(38:27):
because I am very confident, Like that's one thing about
him is he makes me feel like he's not. This
is really I don't know. I explained this. He's the
type of guy he's not. He's not very woman focused,
Like I feel like he doesn't go out and like
look for women. Yeah, kind of to himself. And like
I once was at an event with him. I saw
this girl like kind of like looking at him, going
up to him, talking to him, and he just he
(38:49):
doesn't even like it was or is it. But it's
really funny. So I've always felt very confident. But when
we first started dating, he was on his phone all
the time in the middle of the night, and I'm
because he was doing the foodye stuff, yes, and I'm like,
like I did have questions at that time, like why
(39:12):
are is three in the morning and you're on like
look up and he's on his phone like kind of
turned it and I'm like like, is there something you
need to tell me? Just to light in your eyes
because I'm I'm posting, you know, And I'm don't really
sad because I would like think something was not all
the time you'd be like, no, I'm just posting. I'm
(39:34):
sorry about it. And that was funny because he's on
his phone all the time. So I was thinking like
maybe something but right, So, because both of you have
been divorced, have you thought about what are your thoughts
on marriage in the future. Okay, So when I first
got divorced, I was like, no, I'll never get married
(39:54):
again because I don't have to really. Yeah, totally, we
didn't feel like it didn't makes sense for me. I
think with having kids already and like having a business
and like maybe more assets, Like I felt like it
was going to be complicated, okay, But so I was
very like, oh, I'll never get married again, Noah, girl powers,
sing over whatever whatever in a relationship. And people didn't
(40:19):
agree with me. But I understand because I think people
when they're in a relationship, they want that commitment. It's
not so much about the marriage, but they want that
level of commitment. So for me, I don't want to
get married as long as we're both at the same
level of commitment for now, I think I'm very happy
with as long as we stay committed and you know,
(40:41):
things are going well. I don't think that that'll ever change.
But yeah, you know, I mean I don't know. I
don't know. You're not opposed to it, which is nice,
and you're open to the relationship element, which is she's
opposed to look at that face I learn about marriage.
I feel like it's weird that, like the dad walks
the woman in down the aisle and then he gives
(41:02):
the woman to the man. It feels uncome So yeah,
my personal opinion, I don't need a man panting, like
going from one man to another man, Like I'm all
set that I like them all set. I'm all set.
I respect everybody's beliefs totally, culture and tradition. It just
(41:25):
is probably not for me. Yeah, I hear that, so
would you. Well, I guess it doesn't even matter. I'm
not even gonna ask it. But I feel like when
I got married, the tradition part was really important to me.
And you're right, like after we got married, I still
have this regret that I didn't involve my mom as
(41:45):
much because of the tradition. So, like you know, like
you said, it's tradition for the dad to walk the
bride down the aisle, and I had my dad do that,
and then I had my dad gave like the speech
at the reception and my mom and I. I mean
when my parents divorced in fifth grade, so I lived
(42:07):
with my mom, so I saw my dad like every
other weekend. Um. But I mean, I for I was
really being raised by my mom, you know, just because
we lived together. And I really it's a big regret
of mine to not have involved my mom as much.
So I get that. I totally understand. Every time I
(42:28):
got married, I did it better and better. It's like
my last one. Every time I got married. I gotta
do it every show. Trista, No, I was gonna say,
I don't know your history. So you were married, divorced, remarried.
So here's my history in a nutshell. Everything comes back
to Trista basically for handing me. Hear this, she kicked
(42:53):
me to the curb, so im so. I actually so,
I was a well twenty three year old touring music.
I sent a record deal right on college and I
did the cliche she cliche thing where you marry a model, okay,
and we were married and divorced within a year because
I went on tour with Matchbox twenty as the opener,
and I basically by the time I came home, I
(43:15):
realized that I really wasn't married anymore. So that was awesome.
And then and then a few years later, I end
up on Tristmas season right, and then she, you know,
she rolled the dice with this Ryan character, and thankfully,
you know, because of me endorsing him, they worked out.
(43:36):
I actually really did. I think it's one of my
favorite memories of talking to Tristo about how much I
loved Ryan. But while I was still on the show,
pus um and then um, you know, but it was
one of those things where you know, that was just
such an awesome couple. And then I got married after
being on the show, and that one lasted it's like
six years, and then then we Splepp and now I've
been married every since. So yeah, so technically I should
(43:57):
have gotten annulment probably the first time, but um, I
was too busy traveling around and doing you know the history. Yeah,
so anyway, but I will say to what you were to.
My point three is why even brought that up. Was
my my wife and I got married in twenty sixteen,
and we got it right, you know, like our moms
(44:18):
were our flower girls. My dad was my best man. Yeah,
my sister was the matron of honor. My brother in
law was our reverend you know. Um, so it was
like we really kind of invested in the in those things. Yeah,
that's why I lost it. Yeah, so far, I'm just kidding.
(44:45):
I'm just kidding. I love you and Jess. You guys
were just fine. Thank you. You're all set, as Ashley says,
you're all yes, I'm all set. I'm all well, Ashley.
We I've loved having you hear me, especially, love you
so much. I just feel like whenever we get together,
(45:06):
I just I connect with you so so much. Anytime,
I just actually adore you. Thank you so much for
coming you, Tristo. I feel really connected to you. I
always have thanks for coming. Hopefully I get to see
you in a couple of days, so your schedule so
we can, Okay, I will than I. She is so sweet. Ah,
(45:32):
she's the best. Love her, like, definitely one of my favorite.
I hate that question, like who are your favorite Bachelor
Nation people, because I feel like they're all children, you know,
I can't pick a favorite, but she's definitely one of
my favorites. I mean, one of my favorite memories. We
did this thing in New York um for we TV Bridezillas.
(45:54):
They used to have a show called Bridezillas and it
was me, Yeah, me and her and Dez and Dianna
and I will never forget. We were at this bar
and they started playing um like a Bruno Mars song Finesse,
and we were just in the It seemed like it
was like a like a pub. It wasn't like a club,
it was like a pub. And we were just like
(46:15):
We're just going to get out there and dance. And
one of my favorite memories. Well, especially you being so
like such good dancers. I can only imagine you probably
had some routines in common you'd throw out there in
the dais right. Oh. The thing is, I don't remember
stuff like I literally started learning these routines for this
weekend two days ago, and I Bob, I, I'm so old.
(46:38):
I go to bed like so sort of like rickety,
like my neck is killing me. I know, yeah, Blakeslee
should probably take a video. I'm sure Blakesley will be there.
I don't know, because she came to like the dance
studio that I'm rehearsing at, and she was a lively me.
(47:00):
I'm like, pleasly, Grace, you cannot laugh at your mother
back of the day, I could do this move right now.
I'm gonna take a slower row, like when I do
exercises at home, and they're like for those of you
who can't keep up, you know, I'm like, that's me
because I cannot keep up what I need to totally
all right, Thanks Bob, Thanks everybody, good right, everybody
Hosts And Creators
Ben Higgins
Ashley Iaconetti
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