October 11, 2025 • 36 mins
We’ve assembled a team of sorority women to tell all about the things only Greek gals say, the things only those on the inside know. We’re letting you in on the terms, the words, the phrases…the lingo from the 80s, 90s to now.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sororiti Life with
your hosts me Gia, Judice.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Fessler.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
Hi you guys, So welcome back to another week of
Dirty Rush. I am jen Fessler, and today we have
a couple of producers, a friend of the show. Say
hello to Amy and Lily and Nicky. Amy and Lily
are both producers. Nicki is our friend, and we are
going to talk about lingo. We're going to talk about
(00:31):
it because in the sense of you know, I was
I graduated from University of Texas in nineteen ninety and
Amy and Nicki went through in the nineties and Lily
just graduated. So anyway, the point is that we have
some we're multi generational here. We want to talk about
how lingo has changed over the years, and we you know,
(00:52):
we're I'm just going to like drop drop some expressions
and I want you guys to tell me what you
think that they mean and your take on them. But
how some of the lingo is actually not even acceptable anymore. So,
for instance, I am always amazed. So when I was
going through, I was a Rushie. I went through rush
I was a Rushy. Now and had it took me
(01:13):
a while to figure out what a pn M is.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Yeah, so now you can't use any terminology around the
word rush rushy like it needs to be in this
term like recruitment or P and M is like potential
new member everything.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
When you say you can't use like, what would happen
to you if you used it?
Speaker 4 (01:35):
I mean, so I went to school in La so
pretty like PC and you don't want you don't want,
I think what comes along you get in action?
Speaker 2 (01:43):
No, I mean they didn't get a bed.
Speaker 5 (01:47):
I'm kidding some people would.
Speaker 4 (01:50):
I wouldn't say it was that harsh, but they want
to promote like more inviting language and they don't want
to seem like rush is associated with this idea of
hazing in hazes sing like any kind of I mean,
it's serious, any kind of inkling that there is any
kind of hazing going on in a sorority. You are
immediately reported and you're immediately put on like social probation,
(02:11):
and it really doesn't happen anymore.
Speaker 5 (02:13):
But even so much as and.
Speaker 4 (02:16):
This is getting on a tangent, but even so much
as there being a freshman versus a senior bust to
the football game, it's considered hazing. It's considered like discriminating
based on grade when that's considered hazing.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
But wouldn't pledge be the word that would suggest more hazing?
Speaker 5 (02:36):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (02:37):
But I think this, Yeah rush rush is it's you
use recruitment and you use potential new member, not yeah rushy.
Speaker 6 (02:46):
What does rush mean? I wonder where rush originates from.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
You're just rushing around to every house.
Speaker 6 (02:51):
That's what everybody. I mean.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
I don't know, right, but that's our generation. So let's
stick into this a little bit more, guys. Okay, So,
first of all, when we through in the eighties and nineties,
it was rush. It was an active you were a
rush e all these things. So then, Lily, again, can
you say the words that are used now.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
Now it's potential new member and recruitment.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
What would you call somebody that's an active We would
say active active.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Yeah, you're still allowed to say that because you're an
active member, active member.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Right, And going back to the hazing, it's all about hazing.
Could you not do a party that was only juniors
and seniors?
Speaker 4 (03:31):
No, you could not do like we would want to
have sisterhoods where it was just like freshman bonding and
that was not a thing you could not do.
Speaker 5 (03:41):
Yeah, that was considered hazy.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Really they do it in Texas where my kids go
to school.
Speaker 3 (03:46):
Yeah, well, Rachel, when I know that they were buses
separated and you're not allowed to do that, like.
Speaker 4 (03:50):
You could say if it was really dicey, like if
as a senior you could say.
Speaker 5 (03:55):
Freshmen in the back of the line.
Speaker 4 (03:56):
Because at UCLA are it was a big deal because
UCLA our football stadium is in Pasadena where UCLA is
in Westwood, so it's like an hour drive to get
to our football stadium. And we would charter all these
buses through your sorority. And of course seniors want to
be on the first bus, the first to the game,
first to the tailgate, and they'd be like, freshmen, get
(04:17):
to the back of the line, get to the back
of the bus. If you are caught saying that, you
will be it's a big deal, like immediately to standards.
Even worse because it's considered discriminating and hazing against younger members.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Well, at least it's still called standards. That's what we used.
I was on the standards committee.
Speaker 5 (04:36):
Ours was called NDC Membership Development.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Committee, too many letters to remember.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
No.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Wait, so it's not called standards. No, but you just
called it standards. Yeah, you called it standards. But give
us again what the technical name.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
Was MDC Membership Development Committee Disciplinary.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Sorry, that's weird because I think I don't know. I
didn't know that it was called anything but standard yards.
Speaker 6 (05:00):
Really.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
Yeah, but it's not disciplinary, it's development because it's all
about developing the members.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Are you allowed to have an event that is just pledges?
Speaker 5 (05:11):
No? You could not. That is hazing.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Well, it's almost in my opinion.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
You're like, the whole point of being in a pledge
class is to bond, like these are.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Your sisters or your brothers.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
If you're in a fraternity, and so all of a
sudden to then remove that.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
It almost defeats the purpose in my opinion.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Yeah, and I will tell you because I have boys
that fun fact go to Texas that they do plenty
of things with their pledge class, whether it's mixers with
other freshmen sororities or different.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Things like that. So I wonder if it's just an
UCLA thing. And yeah, because I think a lot of
schools are still doing pledge whatever the name is now
New Me whatever, it is events and how do you
do big little But we'll get to that.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
So Jen, contain, you know, I was just thinking about
because we're just talking about the hazing, and I mean
back in the day when I was, you know, pledging,
we had I don't know what would be if it
wouldn't be allowed today, but there were things that happened.
There was greased pigs that were you know, let go
in the sorority house and things we had aware and.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Wait, wait, wait, wait wait, we're going to need to
explain greased pigs.
Speaker 6 (06:27):
Very Texas, very Texas, very very very Texas.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
What does that mean an actual pig?
Speaker 6 (06:33):
Yes, the well, yes, it was just part of it.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Like you had a there would be a grease pig
and you have a force to like try to catch
the pig.
Speaker 6 (06:41):
And I don't remember exactly.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
I think I probably blocked it, but I mean there
were just a lot of things that were Nothing that
was physically harmful, there was, but there was definitely stuff
that we had to wear, people that we could or
couldn't talk to.
Speaker 5 (06:55):
Wait.
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Jen, you're saying that as a pledge, you were you
like this was kind of part of your initiation. You're
responsible for catching this grease pig.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
No please, no, no, no, no, okay, don't all I
know it was it was a method of torture.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
But there was clearinally some alcohol because you can't remember
what she was doing exactly.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
So I'm sorry, there's an actual I just have to
understand this for people listening. There was a pig, like
a pig with crisco or something all over it, greasy,
running through your sorority house.
Speaker 6 (07:28):
Scare everyone.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
Well, Amy, we didn't do anything like that. Ours was
like we had a sneak. We had a sneak, remember
the Pledge sneak. And I think the job in the
sneak was for us to like kidnap actives and like
take them somewhere. And I do remember as a pledge
people loading up in the back of a U haul,
which I was like, no, no. But there were things.
Speaker 6 (07:51):
Well, I mean we had we had things that was worse.
They were worse.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
There was there was like at one point you went
down and to some dark room and you were we
were lined up and we were all gonna have to
get on a scale and be lined up according to
our weight. We didn't do this, actually did It was
like a tactic but I mean, this is the stuff.
Speaker 5 (08:09):
Imagine that's terrible.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
I know, imagine that they didn't actually do it. I
thought they just scared you that they Yeah, it.
Speaker 6 (08:16):
Was a scare tactic.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
But I mean there was stuff like now you can't
even go to sounds like you can't even say only
freshmen on the bus.
Speaker 6 (08:24):
Like they a line.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Yeah, yeah, because I think there's been so many hazing
things and it's more frat oriented, but the sororities are
always more regulated. And I yeah, I mean all this
stuff you're saying. I also went to school in California,
so it's different in that way too, But I mean
grease pig and laning and lining up on weight.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
But was that Texas or was that Boston?
Speaker 5 (08:49):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (08:49):
I wasn't a sorority until I got to Texas.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Okay, so West Tech well, but it sounds like Texas
back then was almost more agro. But I can tell
you now, like, unless my kids are just not telling
me anything, it seems pretty tame.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
They're probably laughing right now, thinking I'm an idiot. And
even in the nineties at Berkeley, very tame. We I
don't recall one incident of really hate.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
You had to clean up after the upper classmen clean
up any of that.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
No, no way, So what you did, But explain to us, Jen,
what you're talking about. So you had to like clean
their rooms, make their beds.
Speaker 6 (09:22):
What after parties?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
We would have to go in and clean up and
go clean the sorority house after whatever, or after mixers
or matches or none of that.
Speaker 5 (09:30):
That is something that's completely like still around for sure
for guys. For pledges. I mean they do terrible things
to guys.
Speaker 4 (09:37):
I know that for one of the frats on campus,
they made them they wouldn't let them eat anything but
what they called were butter dogs for a week. They
didn't let them have access to their phones. They could
only go to class, but couldn't get any food from
on campus.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
What are butter dogs?
Speaker 4 (09:55):
Butter dogs is like instead of meating the hot dog,
there's a stick of butter ew yes. And they had
to sleep on the floor every night for a week.
And that was like their pledge week.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
We're gonna do an episode soon just all about pledging.
But I can only speak to my experience. Does a
pledge was it was heaven on earth, like you were
just given gifts. I think I was braiding her hair.
I mean, yeah, like you're just given gifts and you're
you know, taken care of, like you're the queen of
the world. So and we weren't allowed to have parties
(10:26):
except you're like you could have parent parties, like your
parents come to visit for you know, pledge Day or whatever.
I don't know. So anyway, Jen keep going through. This
is interesting comparing then and now.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
But I also think it's school to school, Like I
don't even think it's that, and now I just think
it's different.
Speaker 3 (10:44):
And again, guys, I may not be remembering. I just
remember it was like it wasn't like what you're describing.
The one was like giving us gifts and it wasn't like,
you know, we weren't being mothered. It was more like,
you know, we were the lowly pledge class. But and
you know, I'm just thinking about like back to like
the lingo, how much things have really changed like back
in the day. I don't there's so much of the lingo,
(11:06):
you guys that I don't. I don't understand why it
had changed. So one of the most things, one of
the ones that's the most curious for me is why
do you go from big sister, little sister to big
and little.
Speaker 6 (11:16):
Did anyone explain that's a great question. It's so annoying.
Speaker 4 (11:20):
I think it's just like it's more just how we
shorten every our generation shortans everything with texting and whatever.
Speaker 5 (11:26):
You're like, my big, my little.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
It's kind of you're big considered your is her technical name,
your big sister, and you guys just call it big
or do you not use the words?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
You never say big sister. You say she's my big
and then you say my grand big. You don't see
make Graham big sister like my g big and then
you go my gg big.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
I can't that kind of I'm like, really, how lazy
can we be?
Speaker 6 (11:49):
We can't even say the word sister. I can't.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
And like even my friends when my friends are talking
about their kids and they'll be like, oh, Janie's out
with her big and I'm like, honey, you're big what okay,
stop it, just say it a big sister from college.
Speaker 6 (12:05):
I can't take it.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Is the sisterhood of it all, for literally still sort
of a big deal because I think in the you know,
older girls here are era, it is about the sisterhood
and all the things that come with that, do they
still play.
Speaker 5 (12:36):
That up sisterhood?
Speaker 4 (12:38):
I just think it's kind of cringey sister like saying
my sister my sisterhood, like she's my no one. It's
like she's my sorority sister. No one really says that.
But like there's certainly still the alliance that you have
with other with your sorority sisters, like only having friend
groups with that, you know, the clickiness, the only having
(12:58):
friend groups are only friends within a certain sorority. That's
all still relevant and like the loyalty to that is
still there. But the whole idea of sisterhood and my
sister is just kind of like that's.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Interesting because if I was going to introduce Nicky to Jen,
I would say, oh, this is my sorority sister, Nikki.
So you guys don't say that anymore.
Speaker 5 (13:16):
And say we were in the same sorority in college.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
I would say we were in the same sorority in college.
Speaker 6 (13:20):
Well, Amy, you're clearly just not as cool as the
rest of.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Us, Amy, you're so old fashioned.
Speaker 6 (13:26):
Old fashion. What about So we said, like, what about
pledge trainer? Well do you use that still?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Great question? Yes, we were all about the pledge trainer.
Angie was my pledge trainer.
Speaker 6 (13:39):
Do you know what that is?
Speaker 5 (13:40):
This is the first time I've ever heard that.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Somebody you think of somebody disliked. Yes, that sounds like.
Speaker 5 (13:46):
A made up thing. Is that really a thing?
Speaker 2 (13:48):
So the pledge trainer? Yeah, so that was an actual office.
It is for the boys still today. And do they
call it that pledge trainer?
Speaker 5 (13:56):
I have to think about this.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
It's another elongated it's like new member director or something.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Oh my god, so our pledge trainer, yeah, new member director.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Angie was our pledge trainer my year, and she was
like in charge of the pledges, so she would like
I think it was Angie. I feel like Molly maybe,
I don't even remember who mine is. And they kind
of like they're in charge of you, so they would
like help you know what you're doing, and like like
if you were in a meeting, I can kind of
picture a sing in a circle and this pledge trainer
(14:30):
is sort of running the meeting and teaching you things.
And I think there was a binder. I feel like
there was a binder of things we had to memorize
of Kappa stuff, sort.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Of all the violet, all the different facts. We took
a test. Lily, what sorority were you?
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Can you sign in theta? Okay day? I love this.
Speaker 6 (14:46):
I love the comparison. Like just I like watching Lily's face.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
You didn't have a binder full of facts you had
to memorize, like you know, we were. We began in
mon Myth wherever Meth, Illinois, with flirtles everywhere.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
To be honest, it would have been helpful because we
were expected to know like the Evening Grace and all
these songs, and our sorority on campus was the most,
like the most involved in terms of all the songs
and rituals and our things. Like I talk to other
girls and be like what you sing songs A New
Chance and whatever. But like we were just expected to
(15:22):
know it. And people would be like standing around still
munths in and like mumbling the words of the Evening
Grace because no one knew what I was.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
So when you say grace, was it very religious? You're
a sorority? No?
Speaker 4 (15:33):
No, no, yet That's what's interesting is there there were
times where I would look at it was like kind
of God oriented, or maybe it was like where they
could scratched out something where it was saying God or
but and then changed the wording. But it was it
was just used as the word grace. But no, it
wasn't religious.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
It wasn't. It got more old timey, like not religious,
but like the language was real old timey, right did
you do all? And Nikki you can answer this too.
Wear your letters, like would you wear a sweatshirt that
said FDA or would you wear a sweatshirt that said
KKG in your era? Because that was a hard no
go for us in the ninety day. I don't even
(16:12):
know if I had a Kappa sweatshirt. No, I didn't do.
They make them. They totally make them, and it's like
a huge thing. But at cal that would have been
considered a bit embarrassing, Like you would never wear your
in our era, I don't know about now.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
Wait, you guys would never wear merch with there are
our whole businesses back.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
In the day. I was at Texas, I had all.
I had so much A five stuff.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Well, you know at Texas.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
So I have friends that like sm with kids at
SMU and TCU And on the first day of school,
at that point, rush is done and they wear their
letters to the first day of class, which is like
a gut wrench for the people who didn't get a bid,
You almost don't want to go to school because they're
like wearing that stuff proudly.
Speaker 5 (16:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (16:59):
Well, I mean it's a whole like we have merch orders.
There's a whole merch chair about what clothes and t
shirts and stuff and all has your letters on it.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
The only thing we would do is maybe wear a
shirt that was like a party shirt. So like somebody
might create a shirt that was like Kapa Sae party,
But no way would you wear a sweatshirt that said
KKG and that. This is in the nineties, so I don't.
Speaker 5 (17:23):
Know, you know, oh, I feel like that's so cute. Jen.
Speaker 4 (17:26):
The one thing I'll say with this is that the
run rule is that you cannot drink in your letters.
That's a total nogo. You can't drink in your life.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
So if you're going to the bars, you can't wear
your sweatshirt.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
Right, or if you're going to a football game and
you have a you know, k.
Speaker 6 (17:42):
The difference now with you, Lily and us is that
you have social media. You could get caught doing these.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Things exactly, and so it's like if you had a
picture a whole different thing.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Sure, I mean I don't remember that being a rule,
but it's a total different game now.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
I don't remember that rule.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
I remember being on a bus to a formal I
don't know if you were all on this bus, maybe
you weren't there yet, and one of the girls was
so plastered that she stood up in the middle of
the bus and the bus is moving and she fell
forward and vomited everywhere. Seems familiar now if somebody had
a camera or something or a social media can you
imagine if you had like a vendetta against that girl.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
That I have an extremely embarrassing thing. I will admit,
and then you guys can weigh in. So dating even now,
this is like I'm embarrassed to admit this. There's something
about like, if I'm dating someone that was in a fraternity,
I think.
Speaker 5 (18:36):
I know what you're gonna say.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I kind of need it to be a good one.
I think I would be like, no, I donate that.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
I think if it was somebody was like, yeah, I
went to cal I was a cap a sig. I
mentioned I'm making it up, I'd be like, oh.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
Realally, people can reinvent in life, like Amy, I peaked
in high school.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Come on, like it's been a downhill spiral. None of
you guys have that. That you meet someone and they're
like I was an, say my face is bright red,
and you're kind of like, oh, it takes them up
ten notches.
Speaker 5 (19:05):
I'm not gonna lie, I agree with you.
Speaker 3 (19:08):
Thank you. I actually think that the opposite sometimes, like
with my daughter when she finds out my daughter was
in whatever puke when I say it, but she was
in the top the top tiers or whatever it is.
But when she hears about guys that were in also
like she's almost turned off, Like she pictures like, oh god,
it's going to be a frat bro.
Speaker 6 (19:27):
Like she's just not meant Okay.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
Here's the thing that I'm gonna say, though, Amy that
I agree with you, and I'm like this is gonna
sound really bad, but like we went to really nerdy schools,
Like there's a lot of weirdos and even more weirdos
weird guys I would say at cal or UCLA, Like
(19:53):
I don't know, maybe I'm wrong, but Jen, I just
picture like they're being a lot cooler people ut and
there's more like raw and I don't know, would.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
You ever ask someone if you were dating them their
fraternity or would that never come up?
Speaker 3 (20:07):
I do?
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yeah, yeah, people if we're talking about it, I mean,
I asked you guys.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
But I'm just saying, like I'm saying a part of
it a guy, yes, because I just know, like the
chances of them maybe not being super social or being
are just very high if they weren't in a few
just because there were so few I think social guys.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
I'm just being vulnerable and admitting it. I think I
would maybe judge somebody.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
No, I mean I think it's listen, we all judge.
Doesn't matter whatever, it's always it's always something, right. I
don't know if that would be the thing. And also
I think because maybe because I, for whatever reason, I
have like a real aversion to a certain maybe because
of my daughter to like a frat bro type or
(20:56):
like a finance grow living in New York City, and
it's this, it's she describes it to me. It's like
the boy that just still thinks that he's in a frat.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Oh.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Interesting, he's a cliche, right, He's just he's just still
all he wants to do is like party with the
bros and do all the frat crap and for her
that's becoming like a turnoff right like they were adulting
out of that Now, doesn't mean that she wouldn't she
wouldn't judge.
Speaker 6 (21:21):
I guess.
Speaker 3 (21:21):
So she heard that he was in a frat that
had a certain reputation, maybe she would judge.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
But I don't know.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
I mean, listen, we all judge all the time. Unfortunately,
that's what humans do.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
But Amy, if somebody didn't get in a fraternity, would
you judge that person too? So forget being a bad fratunity,
what about somebody who went through rush and just didn't
get a house or Amy?
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Actually, don't ask. Let's not answer that question. I mean
I think so like I think, I'm sorry, I'm telling
the truth. It's anonymous. I'm saying as a person that
was in a sorority and in the Greek system, and
you can judge me. I get it, like be mad
about it and think I'm a big dor but like, yeah,
there might be something, especially if you're from the school
(22:01):
I went to. Maybe I wouldn't judge you if you weren't,
but it definitely takes you up five notches if you were.
Maybe I'll say that, But are you stuck in your
college experience, then of course for sure.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
Well I'm going to piggyback off of Amy, Like I
think I would go as far as if they went
to a different school and I saw that they were
in a frat, I would look up on Greek rank
and see what what's Greek?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
Greek?
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Oh my god, Greek rank is for well, I'm sorry, Lily,
because I'm just what I know of it. It's literally
this this site or whatever where that they get ranked
all the Greek so the houses get ranked, and this
one is for smart boys, this one's for the pretty girls,
this one's right, is that ryes well?
Speaker 5 (22:42):
And it's it's like this is everything. Yes, every school,
it'll say, this is what's the top sorority in top fraternity?
Right now?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Wait, can you Greek rank our sororities?
Speaker 6 (22:53):
Yes, yeah, I could look it right up. It'll tell
you all.
Speaker 5 (22:57):
I'll tell you right now.
Speaker 6 (22:59):
But a Greek or something?
Speaker 2 (23:02):
What is Kappa at cal?
Speaker 5 (23:04):
Let's look, let's just do it.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
I think it's from what I'm told, it's still good.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
But I think to Lily's point, like I think Berkeley
and UCLA is I get it like a bunch of right.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
I mean, we have to be very smart to go there,
but you get.
Speaker 5 (23:19):
A lot of kind of weirdos.
Speaker 4 (23:21):
So I think, like I would ask, why weren't you
in a you know, because I know that those guys
I get it in other schools where they're more fratty
than those like top top frats quote, but I think
at different schools, like at UCLA, it was kind of
like if you weren't in a top frat, you were
kind of weird.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
You know, when you're in college, you're like, oh, I
went to high school with him, he was such a kee.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Hometown pro, hometown con that was some of our lingo.
Nikki explained what hometown pro is, hometown con is.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Okay, so and again you'll know this more Lily, But
it's my understanding that today the only people that can
quote vote on a potential pledgey is somebody that you
actually had talked to and had contact with, whereas with
us back in the day, we would gather at night
and we would all sit at these tables for hours
(24:14):
and a name would be brought up, and if you
had something to say, you know, good or unsavory, you
would get up and you would be like, hometown con
she slept with my best friend's boyfriend. And then you know,
and then your little friends, your click of friends would
like support you, and all of a sudden that person
(24:37):
was kind of had a tough time depending on where
your standing was in the sorority. Right. Similarly, if there
was somebody that was really important you know to you
that you wanted a sorority and maybe tanked. I mean,
one of my best friends, quite frankly, was horrible in
rush and Amy, you weren't there yet, and I sat
(25:01):
up and this was like really important to me, And
I stood up and I was like I would brush
my teeth next to her. That was like the line
that you wouldn't use. It was like best and final on.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
A real estate deal.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
And then your friends if you were quote popular and
the sorority would like vote for you to support your.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Friend getting in. And I don't think it's that way anymore,
is it? Back in our day? What I'll say is,
if you had enough juice, one person was very popular,
well liked in the sorority, they would have enough juice
to get somebody into the sorority or kill literally or
kill out. Can you remember it all, Nikki? When your
(25:44):
sister was going through rush, Like were you nervous? Like,
oh God, now I have to go into this meeting
and they're going to talk about my sister.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
I wasn't nervous her year because legacy mattered. It was
the year before you and I had three friends going
through it. One who was one of my best friends
and we rushed freshman year and she didn't get a house.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Two was my other best friend who was like dead
as a doorknob.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
I mean I was like walking by her and I'd
be like talk talk talk, you know. And then my
other friend was the sister of somebody who had graduated,
and you know, that didn't happen, and.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
So it was a rough Did you get all three in?
I did not? Did you get wan? And I got too?
Speaker 1 (26:31):
And it was a very and I was a sophomore, right,
so I was kind of nothing.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
It was a very rough rush for me.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
When you guys came along, I didn't know I had
met you and said be best friends with my sister.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
But it was Lisa, and she was it was going
to be no issue because legacy then it didn't matter, right,
And I was a legacy also.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
I will tell you at Texas. You know, legacy and
all that. At least in the fraternity, it still exists.
It's my understand with the sororities that it does not.
Speaker 5 (27:02):
No, but hometown votes still are a big deal.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
So so, Lily, that's an interesting question that Nikki brings up. So,
say there was a girl that you knew, how would
you convey that to your sisters, sorry to say sisters,
how would you convey that? Like, hey, you got to
get this girl in. Yeah, you're not.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
Having meetings, okay, well you do like work week prior
the week prior to rush recruitment. You basically we would
have a Now I'm really not supposed.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
To say this, but that's okay. Let it know.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
You would have a presentation of all of the girls
that you were you were looking out for that you
may like, even remotely new, Like this girl's super cute,
she likes to do this.
Speaker 5 (27:50):
Here's some fun facts about her.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Do you show their social media?
Speaker 4 (27:54):
Yeah, you show a picture of them, like the best
picture of them, and you put them in there and
you say you did not.
Speaker 6 (27:59):
Also go back and we had to submit pictures and that.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Would them well with letters, we had wreck letters.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
I had a flashback of Lily won't even know what
this is, that old timey thing. It was like a
big box and it had a light on it and
you would have to put the thing and the piece
of paper on the light thing and somehow the light
would then flash it to a screen like it was
eighteen hundreds. We had a pay phone. That's what we did.
Speaker 7 (28:42):
I mean there was no Also, did did you guys
have like during skits like we so fies would put
all the girls that were really wanted, like in the
first couple of rows.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
No, but you mentioned that, I think in an earlier episode,
and that was interesting. I don't think we were clever
enough to figure out how to get the the girls
you want the most into the front row. But we
knew we had a hit list. We did have a
hit We did have that. Yeah, yeah, And you would
also send a floater. Hey, Like if some like you know,
top notch Active was a floater, you'd be like, get
(29:16):
over there to so and so and get them in.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
But you had matched like your best sorry Lily Active
with the best rushie to make it.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
It was like a signing meeting. That's really what it was.
Speaker 4 (29:31):
Totally that all of that strategy is still very much
roud and you can even like we would have a
voting scale if you knew someone from home and you
were like, you really want it had to be one
way or the other. You had to be really strong
vote them, and it was called a hometown vote, and
you could only vote people zero or four. Zero would
(29:52):
mean she slept with my sister's boyfriend and whatever, she
cannot step foot in here, and you would probably try
to rally some of your friends and say unied hometown
voter to and give her a zero or because all
numbers about your score and about people who talked to
or you could be like, I love her so much,
as Amy said, I would brush my teeth next to her.
Speaker 6 (30:11):
What about did you guys get pro con pro thing?
Speaker 4 (30:14):
Then you just go into normal recruitment and you're talking
them and everyone gives scores. You don't have this thing
at the end of the day where everyone's like raising
their hand and rallying for one.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
Which is so interesting because the meeting was really more
important essentially than like the score, because you could really
get someone's score. They could have a low score and
you could get them up high. So pro con pro
for people listening. There was a method to the madness,
like they didn't want you just having these meetings where
you were like, I don't like her.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
But Amy, we could vote on everybody. But literally, isn't
it true? The only people who can vote is somebody
who actually had direct conversation or interaction with the with
the I'm sorry whatever, what do.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
You call the membership potential pms.
Speaker 4 (30:58):
It had a pan and m yes, yes, I yes,
But I think there are some things that happen under
the table that you do to try to get Like
if you're because everyone wants the best girls, and so
if I know someone from home and I'm like, we
need to get her in here, and God forbid, something
(31:19):
were to happen where she were in which happens all
the time, where she got dropped or whatever, I would try.
I would give her a hometown vote. I'm the only
person like who can do that. But then maybe I
would try to give my friends like say you know
her from home too, you give her a four from
a hometown vote, or you go out and talk to her.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
So pro con pro So everybody listening, that's like, what's
pro con pro? Well, you have to I mean it's
the word. We understand the definition of it, right, Yeah,
But I think people listening don't necessarily understand that. In
this meeting, they would go what do you think of NICKI?
And they might show your photo, and then one girl
could stand up from the room in this big dining
room and say, I went to high school with Nikki.
(31:58):
I love her. She's totally Kapa mater. She's amazing, she's
so smart. You know, she's studying to be a doctor.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
Right.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
But then somebody has the opportunity to stand up. You
have to stand up, if I remember, And then you say,
you know, I talked to her today and I thought
I thought she was a bit dull, you know, sorry
to say, but then you have to end on a pro,
like ending on something positive made it all okay, Like
that was sort of the theory, like she's a total whore,
(32:26):
but I liked your ear rings, yeah, Verry was. If
you ended on this pro, then really we weren't these
terrible people in this room talking about people. And I
remember I helped with Rush at a different school, Uzela,
and they had pro con pro but if they could
(32:48):
not figure out what to say, they would stand up
and say nice, sweet, cute and that actually meant voter out.
What about no comment not the same thing. Yeah, they basically,
but I think you're technically not supposed to say no comments.
So they would say a pro which was nice, sweet cute,
(33:08):
but it was code to the girls, noop, ugly fat
nor Now we never I never experienced anybody saying something
in a meeting. I will say, and we'll end on this,
somebody's saying something about somebody's appearance. That would be that
is I never experienced that. I don't know about the
(33:30):
rest of you, but I never had it in a
meeting where somebody was talking about somebody's I.
Speaker 6 (33:34):
Don't remember it being blatant, but certainly there it was there.
It was hanging out.
Speaker 3 (33:39):
If you have a bunch of rushies or pnms or
whatever you want to call them, coming through, we're talking
about who went into the two front rows or like
it was the prettier girls. I mean, that was just
and I think that's you cannot deny that that's a.
Speaker 6 (33:53):
Big effort all of this. It just is, you know,
what is a top tier sorority. I think that it's
you know, a lot of.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
Times it's dick bait, right, it's the hot girls to
get like the guys and vice versa. Right, And so
even if you look at the tiktoks for sority Rush,
which I watch and thank god I don't have girls,
and I see the girls with their dance moves and
how hot they are.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
And how like sexy they are, and I'm like, oh
my god.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
And there was one TikTok that showed like Rush in
the eighties and nineties compared to Rush now and it
was like bargain basement like posters, handmade posters and so different,
so different.
Speaker 5 (34:35):
Can I give you the Greek rank what it says
for Kappa?
Speaker 2 (34:40):
Definitely good way to end this episode.
Speaker 5 (34:43):
Okay, so how you read Greek rank.
Speaker 4 (34:45):
It's not the actual rankings that are posted, but you
have to go into the discussion section because those are
real people.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
Okay, it's like Reddit and people like Reddit.
Speaker 4 (34:54):
Yeah, like Reddit like people will up arrow it and
down aarrow it if it's right.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
So on August we do.
Speaker 4 (35:01):
They said for the rank for the sorority rankings at
cal Top, it says Kappa one hundred and forty years
of recruiting powerful, rich connected women.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Oh girls.
Speaker 6 (35:15):
So anyway, you guys amazing, right, how lingos have.
Speaker 3 (35:19):
Some things change. The more things change, I never.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
Know whether to like end these episodes feeling like a
little giggle, a little love, or if I need hour.
It's sort of all of the above.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
I feel the same way I loved being in a sorority.
I know my daughter loved being in a sorority. And
then sometimes I think, how in the world could you
have ever been in a sorority?
Speaker 6 (35:39):
How dare you?
Speaker 2 (35:40):
I think it's gotten worse, Like.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
Yeah, it's a vicious it's a lot of good, maybe
some bad as well, but anyway, thanks you guys so much.
Speaker 6 (35:49):
Love talking lingo with you.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
Bye.
Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sororiti Life with
your hosts me Gia, Judice.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Fessler.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
Hi you guys, So welcome back to another week of
Dirty Rush. I am jen Fessler, and today we have
a couple of producers, a friend of the show. Say
hello to Amy and Lily and Nicky. Amy and Lily
are both producers. Nicki is our friend, and we are
going to talk about lingo. We're going to talk about
(00:31):
it because in the sense of you know, I was
I graduated from University of Texas in nineteen ninety and
Amy and Nicki went through in the nineties and Lily
just graduated. So anyway, the point is that we have
some we're multi generational here. We want to talk about
how lingo has changed over the years, and we you know,
(00:52):
we're I'm just going to like drop drop some expressions
and I want you guys to tell me what you
think that they mean and your take on them. But
how some of the lingo is actually not even acceptable anymore. So,
for instance, I am always amazed. So when I was
going through, I was a Rushie. I went through rush
I was a Rushy. Now and had it took me
(01:13):
a while to figure out what a pn M is.
Speaker 4 (01:16):
Yeah, so now you can't use any terminology around the
word rush rushy like it needs to be in this
term like recruitment or P and M is like potential
new member everything.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
When you say you can't use like, what would happen
to you if you used it?
Speaker 4 (01:35):
I mean, so I went to school in La so
pretty like PC and you don't want you don't want,
I think what comes along you get in action?
Speaker 2 (01:43):
No, I mean they didn't get a bed.
Speaker 5 (01:47):
I'm kidding some people would.
Speaker 4 (01:50):
I wouldn't say it was that harsh, but they want
to promote like more inviting language and they don't want
to seem like rush is associated with this idea of
hazing in hazes sing like any kind of I mean,
it's serious, any kind of inkling that there is any
kind of hazing going on in a sorority. You are
immediately reported and you're immediately put on like social probation,
(02:11):
and it really doesn't happen anymore.
Speaker 5 (02:13):
But even so much as and.
Speaker 4 (02:16):
This is getting on a tangent, but even so much
as there being a freshman versus a senior bust to
the football game, it's considered hazing. It's considered like discriminating
based on grade when that's considered hazing.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
But wouldn't pledge be the word that would suggest more hazing?
Speaker 5 (02:36):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (02:37):
But I think this, Yeah rush rush is it's you
use recruitment and you use potential new member, not yeah rushy.
Speaker 6 (02:46):
What does rush mean? I wonder where rush originates from.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
You're just rushing around to every house.
Speaker 6 (02:51):
That's what everybody. I mean.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
I don't know, right, but that's our generation. So let's
stick into this a little bit more, guys. Okay, So,
first of all, when we through in the eighties and nineties,
it was rush. It was an active you were a
rush e all these things. So then, Lily, again, can
you say the words that are used now.
Speaker 4 (03:12):
Now it's potential new member and recruitment.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
What would you call somebody that's an active We would
say active active.
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Yeah, you're still allowed to say that because you're an
active member, active member.
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Right, And going back to the hazing, it's all about hazing.
Could you not do a party that was only juniors
and seniors?
Speaker 4 (03:31):
No, you could not do like we would want to
have sisterhoods where it was just like freshman bonding and
that was not a thing you could not do.
Speaker 5 (03:41):
Yeah, that was considered hazy.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
Really they do it in Texas where my kids go
to school.
Speaker 3 (03:46):
Yeah, well, Rachel, when I know that they were buses
separated and you're not allowed to do that, like.
Speaker 4 (03:50):
You could say if it was really dicey, like if
as a senior you could say.
Speaker 5 (03:55):
Freshmen in the back of the line.
Speaker 4 (03:56):
Because at UCLA are it was a big deal because
UCLA our football stadium is in Pasadena where UCLA is
in Westwood, so it's like an hour drive to get
to our football stadium. And we would charter all these
buses through your sorority. And of course seniors want to
be on the first bus, the first to the game,
first to the tailgate, and they'd be like, freshmen, get
(04:17):
to the back of the line, get to the back
of the bus. If you are caught saying that, you
will be it's a big deal, like immediately to standards.
Even worse because it's considered discriminating and hazing against younger members.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Well, at least it's still called standards. That's what we used.
I was on the standards committee.
Speaker 5 (04:36):
Ours was called NDC Membership Development.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Committee, too many letters to remember.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
No.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Wait, so it's not called standards. No, but you just
called it standards. Yeah, you called it standards. But give
us again what the technical name.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
Was MDC Membership Development Committee Disciplinary.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Sorry, that's weird because I think I don't know. I
didn't know that it was called anything but standard yards.
Speaker 6 (05:00):
Really.
Speaker 4 (05:00):
Yeah, but it's not disciplinary, it's development because it's all
about developing the members.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Are you allowed to have an event that is just pledges?
Speaker 5 (05:11):
No? You could not. That is hazing.
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Well, it's almost in my opinion.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
You're like, the whole point of being in a pledge
class is to bond, like these are.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Your sisters or your brothers.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
If you're in a fraternity, and so all of a
sudden to then remove that.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
It almost defeats the purpose in my opinion.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Yeah, and I will tell you because I have boys
that fun fact go to Texas that they do plenty
of things with their pledge class, whether it's mixers with
other freshmen sororities or different.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Things like that. So I wonder if it's just an
UCLA thing. And yeah, because I think a lot of
schools are still doing pledge whatever the name is now
New Me whatever, it is events and how do you
do big little But we'll get to that.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
So Jen, contain, you know, I was just thinking about
because we're just talking about the hazing, and I mean
back in the day when I was, you know, pledging,
we had I don't know what would be if it
wouldn't be allowed today, but there were things that happened.
There was greased pigs that were you know, let go
in the sorority house and things we had aware and.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Wait, wait, wait, wait wait, we're going to need to
explain greased pigs.
Speaker 6 (06:27):
Very Texas, very Texas, very very very Texas.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
What does that mean an actual pig?
Speaker 6 (06:33):
Yes, the well, yes, it was just part of it.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
Like you had a there would be a grease pig
and you have a force to like try to catch
the pig.
Speaker 6 (06:41):
And I don't remember exactly.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
I think I probably blocked it, but I mean there
were just a lot of things that were Nothing that
was physically harmful, there was, but there was definitely stuff
that we had to wear, people that we could or
couldn't talk to.
Speaker 5 (06:55):
Wait.
Speaker 4 (06:56):
Jen, you're saying that as a pledge, you were you
like this was kind of part of your initiation. You're
responsible for catching this grease pig.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
No please, no, no, no, no, okay, don't all I
know it was it was a method of torture.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
But there was clearinally some alcohol because you can't remember
what she was doing exactly.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
So I'm sorry, there's an actual I just have to
understand this for people listening. There was a pig, like
a pig with crisco or something all over it, greasy,
running through your sorority house.
Speaker 6 (07:28):
Scare everyone.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
Well, Amy, we didn't do anything like that. Ours was
like we had a sneak. We had a sneak, remember
the Pledge sneak. And I think the job in the
sneak was for us to like kidnap actives and like
take them somewhere. And I do remember as a pledge
people loading up in the back of a U haul,
which I was like, no, no. But there were things.
Speaker 6 (07:51):
Well, I mean we had we had things that was worse.
They were worse.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
There was there was like at one point you went
down and to some dark room and you were we
were lined up and we were all gonna have to
get on a scale and be lined up according to
our weight. We didn't do this, actually did It was
like a tactic but I mean, this is the stuff.
Speaker 5 (08:09):
Imagine that's terrible.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
I know, imagine that they didn't actually do it. I
thought they just scared you that they Yeah, it.
Speaker 6 (08:16):
Was a scare tactic.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
But I mean there was stuff like now you can't
even go to sounds like you can't even say only
freshmen on the bus.
Speaker 6 (08:24):
Like they a line.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Yeah, yeah, because I think there's been so many hazing
things and it's more frat oriented, but the sororities are
always more regulated. And I yeah, I mean all this
stuff you're saying. I also went to school in California,
so it's different in that way too, But I mean
grease pig and laning and lining up on weight.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
But was that Texas or was that Boston?
Speaker 5 (08:49):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (08:49):
I wasn't a sorority until I got to Texas.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Okay, so West Tech well, but it sounds like Texas
back then was almost more agro. But I can tell
you now, like, unless my kids are just not telling
me anything, it seems pretty tame.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
They're probably laughing right now, thinking I'm an idiot. And
even in the nineties at Berkeley, very tame. We I
don't recall one incident of really hate.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
You had to clean up after the upper classmen clean
up any of that.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
No, no way, So what you did, But explain to us, Jen,
what you're talking about. So you had to like clean
their rooms, make their beds.
Speaker 6 (09:22):
What after parties?
Speaker 3 (09:23):
We would have to go in and clean up and
go clean the sorority house after whatever, or after mixers
or matches or none of that.
Speaker 5 (09:30):
That is something that's completely like still around for sure
for guys. For pledges. I mean they do terrible things
to guys.
Speaker 4 (09:37):
I know that for one of the frats on campus,
they made them they wouldn't let them eat anything but
what they called were butter dogs for a week. They
didn't let them have access to their phones. They could
only go to class, but couldn't get any food from
on campus.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
What are butter dogs?
Speaker 4 (09:55):
Butter dogs is like instead of meating the hot dog,
there's a stick of butter ew yes. And they had
to sleep on the floor every night for a week.
And that was like their pledge week.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
We're gonna do an episode soon just all about pledging.
But I can only speak to my experience. Does a
pledge was it was heaven on earth, like you were
just given gifts. I think I was braiding her hair.
I mean, yeah, like you're just given gifts and you're
you know, taken care of, like you're the queen of
the world. So and we weren't allowed to have parties
(10:26):
except you're like you could have parent parties, like your
parents come to visit for you know, pledge Day or whatever.
I don't know. So anyway, Jen keep going through. This
is interesting comparing then and now.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
But I also think it's school to school, Like I
don't even think it's that, and now I just think
it's different.
Speaker 3 (10:44):
And again, guys, I may not be remembering. I just
remember it was like it wasn't like what you're describing.
The one was like giving us gifts and it wasn't like,
you know, we weren't being mothered. It was more like,
you know, we were the lowly pledge class. But and
you know, I'm just thinking about like back to like
the lingo, how much things have really changed like back
in the day. I don't there's so much of the lingo,
(11:06):
you guys that I don't. I don't understand why it
had changed. So one of the most things, one of
the ones that's the most curious for me is why
do you go from big sister, little sister to big
and little.
Speaker 6 (11:16):
Did anyone explain that's a great question. It's so annoying.
Speaker 4 (11:20):
I think it's just like it's more just how we
shorten every our generation shortans everything with texting and whatever.
Speaker 5 (11:26):
You're like, my big, my little.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
It's kind of you're big considered your is her technical name,
your big sister, and you guys just call it big
or do you not use the words?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
You never say big sister. You say she's my big
and then you say my grand big. You don't see
make Graham big sister like my g big and then
you go my gg big.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
I can't that kind of I'm like, really, how lazy
can we be?
Speaker 6 (11:49):
We can't even say the word sister. I can't.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
And like even my friends when my friends are talking
about their kids and they'll be like, oh, Janie's out
with her big and I'm like, honey, you're big what okay,
stop it, just say it a big sister from college.
Speaker 6 (12:05):
I can't take it.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
Is the sisterhood of it all, for literally still sort
of a big deal because I think in the you know,
older girls here are era, it is about the sisterhood
and all the things that come with that, do they
still play.
Speaker 5 (12:36):
That up sisterhood?
Speaker 4 (12:38):
I just think it's kind of cringey sister like saying
my sister my sisterhood, like she's my no one. It's
like she's my sorority sister. No one really says that.
But like there's certainly still the alliance that you have
with other with your sorority sisters, like only having friend
groups with that, you know, the clickiness, the only having
(12:58):
friend groups are only friends within a certain sorority. That's
all still relevant and like the loyalty to that is
still there. But the whole idea of sisterhood and my
sister is just kind of like that's.
Speaker 2 (13:10):
Interesting because if I was going to introduce Nicky to Jen,
I would say, oh, this is my sorority sister, Nikki.
So you guys don't say that anymore.
Speaker 5 (13:16):
And say we were in the same sorority in college.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
I would say we were in the same sorority in college.
Speaker 6 (13:20):
Well, Amy, you're clearly just not as cool as the
rest of.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Us, Amy, you're so old fashioned.
Speaker 6 (13:26):
Old fashion. What about So we said, like, what about
pledge trainer? Well do you use that still?
Speaker 2 (13:33):
Great question? Yes, we were all about the pledge trainer.
Angie was my pledge trainer.
Speaker 6 (13:39):
Do you know what that is?
Speaker 5 (13:40):
This is the first time I've ever heard that.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Somebody you think of somebody disliked. Yes, that sounds like.
Speaker 5 (13:46):
A made up thing. Is that really a thing?
Speaker 2 (13:48):
So the pledge trainer? Yeah, so that was an actual office.
It is for the boys still today. And do they
call it that pledge trainer?
Speaker 5 (13:56):
I have to think about this.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
It's another elongated it's like new member director or something.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Oh my god, so our pledge trainer, yeah, new member director.
Speaker 1 (14:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Angie was our pledge trainer my year, and she was
like in charge of the pledges, so she would like
I think it was Angie. I feel like Molly maybe,
I don't even remember who mine is. And they kind
of like they're in charge of you, so they would
like help you know what you're doing, and like like
if you were in a meeting, I can kind of
picture a sing in a circle and this pledge trainer
(14:30):
is sort of running the meeting and teaching you things.
And I think there was a binder. I feel like
there was a binder of things we had to memorize
of Kappa stuff, sort.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Of all the violet, all the different facts. We took
a test. Lily, what sorority were you?
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Can you sign in theta? Okay day? I love this.
Speaker 6 (14:46):
I love the comparison. Like just I like watching Lily's face.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
You didn't have a binder full of facts you had
to memorize, like you know, we were. We began in
mon Myth wherever Meth, Illinois, with flirtles everywhere.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
To be honest, it would have been helpful because we
were expected to know like the Evening Grace and all
these songs, and our sorority on campus was the most,
like the most involved in terms of all the songs
and rituals and our things. Like I talk to other
girls and be like what you sing songs A New
Chance and whatever. But like we were just expected to
(15:22):
know it. And people would be like standing around still
munths in and like mumbling the words of the Evening
Grace because no one knew what I was.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
So when you say grace, was it very religious? You're
a sorority? No?
Speaker 4 (15:33):
No, no, yet That's what's interesting is there there were
times where I would look at it was like kind
of God oriented, or maybe it was like where they
could scratched out something where it was saying God or
but and then changed the wording. But it was it
was just used as the word grace. But no, it
wasn't religious.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
It wasn't. It got more old timey, like not religious,
but like the language was real old timey, right did
you do all? And Nikki you can answer this too.
Wear your letters, like would you wear a sweatshirt that
said FDA or would you wear a sweatshirt that said
KKG in your era? Because that was a hard no
go for us in the ninety day. I don't even
(16:12):
know if I had a Kappa sweatshirt. No, I didn't do.
They make them. They totally make them, and it's like
a huge thing. But at cal that would have been
considered a bit embarrassing, Like you would never wear your
in our era, I don't know about now.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
Wait, you guys would never wear merch with there are
our whole businesses back.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
In the day. I was at Texas, I had all.
I had so much A five stuff.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Well, you know at Texas.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
So I have friends that like sm with kids at
SMU and TCU And on the first day of school,
at that point, rush is done and they wear their
letters to the first day of class, which is like
a gut wrench for the people who didn't get a bid,
You almost don't want to go to school because they're
like wearing that stuff proudly.
Speaker 5 (16:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (16:59):
Well, I mean it's a whole like we have merch orders.
There's a whole merch chair about what clothes and t
shirts and stuff and all has your letters on it.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
The only thing we would do is maybe wear a
shirt that was like a party shirt. So like somebody
might create a shirt that was like Kapa Sae party,
But no way would you wear a sweatshirt that said
KKG and that. This is in the nineties, so I don't.
Speaker 5 (17:23):
Know, you know, oh, I feel like that's so cute. Jen.
Speaker 4 (17:26):
The one thing I'll say with this is that the
run rule is that you cannot drink in your letters.
That's a total nogo. You can't drink in your life.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
So if you're going to the bars, you can't wear
your sweatshirt.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
Right, or if you're going to a football game and
you have a you know, k.
Speaker 6 (17:42):
The difference now with you, Lily and us is that
you have social media. You could get caught doing these.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Things exactly, and so it's like if you had a
picture a whole different thing.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Sure, I mean I don't remember that being a rule,
but it's a total different game now.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
I don't remember that rule.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
I remember being on a bus to a formal I
don't know if you were all on this bus, maybe
you weren't there yet, and one of the girls was
so plastered that she stood up in the middle of
the bus and the bus is moving and she fell
forward and vomited everywhere. Seems familiar now if somebody had
a camera or something or a social media can you
imagine if you had like a vendetta against that girl.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
That I have an extremely embarrassing thing. I will admit,
and then you guys can weigh in. So dating even now,
this is like I'm embarrassed to admit this. There's something
about like, if I'm dating someone that was in a fraternity,
I think.
Speaker 5 (18:36):
I know what you're gonna say.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
I kind of need it to be a good one.
I think I would be like, no, I donate that.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
I think if it was somebody was like, yeah, I
went to cal I was a cap a sig. I
mentioned I'm making it up, I'd be like, oh.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
Realally, people can reinvent in life, like Amy, I peaked
in high school.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Come on, like it's been a downhill spiral. None of
you guys have that. That you meet someone and they're
like I was an, say my face is bright red,
and you're kind of like, oh, it takes them up
ten notches.
Speaker 5 (19:05):
I'm not gonna lie, I agree with you.
Speaker 3 (19:08):
Thank you. I actually think that the opposite sometimes, like
with my daughter when she finds out my daughter was
in whatever puke when I say it, but she was
in the top the top tiers or whatever it is.
But when she hears about guys that were in also
like she's almost turned off, Like she pictures like, oh god,
it's going to be a frat bro.
Speaker 6 (19:27):
Like she's just not meant Okay.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
Here's the thing that I'm gonna say, though, Amy that
I agree with you, and I'm like this is gonna
sound really bad, but like we went to really nerdy schools,
Like there's a lot of weirdos and even more weirdos
weird guys I would say at cal or UCLA, Like
(19:53):
I don't know, maybe I'm wrong, but Jen, I just
picture like they're being a lot cooler people ut and
there's more like raw and I don't know, would.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
You ever ask someone if you were dating them their
fraternity or would that never come up?
Speaker 3 (20:07):
I do?
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yeah, yeah, people if we're talking about it, I mean,
I asked you guys.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
But I'm just saying, like I'm saying a part of
it a guy, yes, because I just know, like the
chances of them maybe not being super social or being
are just very high if they weren't in a few
just because there were so few I think social guys.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
I'm just being vulnerable and admitting it. I think I
would maybe judge somebody.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
No, I mean I think it's listen, we all judge.
Doesn't matter whatever, it's always it's always something, right. I
don't know if that would be the thing. And also
I think because maybe because I, for whatever reason, I
have like a real aversion to a certain maybe because
of my daughter to like a frat bro type or
(20:56):
like a finance grow living in New York City, and
it's this, it's she describes it to me. It's like
the boy that just still thinks that he's in a frat.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Oh.
Speaker 3 (21:04):
Interesting, he's a cliche, right, He's just he's just still
all he wants to do is like party with the
bros and do all the frat crap and for her
that's becoming like a turnoff right like they were adulting
out of that Now, doesn't mean that she wouldn't she
wouldn't judge.
Speaker 6 (21:21):
I guess.
Speaker 3 (21:21):
So she heard that he was in a frat that
had a certain reputation, maybe she would judge.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
But I don't know.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
I mean, listen, we all judge all the time. Unfortunately,
that's what humans do.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
But Amy, if somebody didn't get in a fraternity, would
you judge that person too? So forget being a bad fratunity,
what about somebody who went through rush and just didn't
get a house or Amy?
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Actually, don't ask. Let's not answer that question. I mean
I think so like I think, I'm sorry, I'm telling
the truth. It's anonymous. I'm saying as a person that
was in a sorority and in the Greek system, and
you can judge me. I get it, like be mad
about it and think I'm a big dor but like, yeah,
there might be something, especially if you're from the school
(22:01):
I went to. Maybe I wouldn't judge you if you weren't,
but it definitely takes you up five notches if you were.
Maybe I'll say that, But are you stuck in your
college experience, then of course for sure.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
Well I'm going to piggyback off of Amy, Like I
think I would go as far as if they went
to a different school and I saw that they were
in a frat, I would look up on Greek rank
and see what what's Greek?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
Greek?
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Oh my god, Greek rank is for well, I'm sorry, Lily,
because I'm just what I know of it. It's literally
this this site or whatever where that they get ranked
all the Greek so the houses get ranked, and this
one is for smart boys, this one's for the pretty girls,
this one's right, is that ryes well?
Speaker 5 (22:42):
And it's it's like this is everything. Yes, every school,
it'll say, this is what's the top sorority in top fraternity?
Right now?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Wait, can you Greek rank our sororities?
Speaker 6 (22:53):
Yes, yeah, I could look it right up. It'll tell
you all.
Speaker 5 (22:57):
I'll tell you right now.
Speaker 6 (22:59):
But a Greek or something?
Speaker 2 (23:02):
What is Kappa at cal?
Speaker 5 (23:04):
Let's look, let's just do it.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
I think it's from what I'm told, it's still good.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
But I think to Lily's point, like I think Berkeley
and UCLA is I get it like a bunch of right.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
I mean, we have to be very smart to go there,
but you get.
Speaker 5 (23:19):
A lot of kind of weirdos.
Speaker 4 (23:21):
So I think, like I would ask, why weren't you
in a you know, because I know that those guys
I get it in other schools where they're more fratty
than those like top top frats quote, but I think
at different schools, like at UCLA, it was kind of
like if you weren't in a top frat, you were
kind of weird.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
You know, when you're in college, you're like, oh, I
went to high school with him, he was such a kee.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Hometown pro, hometown con that was some of our lingo.
Nikki explained what hometown pro is, hometown con is.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Okay, so and again you'll know this more Lily, But
it's my understanding that today the only people that can
quote vote on a potential pledgey is somebody that you
actually had talked to and had contact with, whereas with
us back in the day, we would gather at night
and we would all sit at these tables for hours
(24:14):
and a name would be brought up, and if you
had something to say, you know, good or unsavory, you
would get up and you would be like, hometown con
she slept with my best friend's boyfriend. And then you know,
and then your little friends, your click of friends would
like support you, and all of a sudden that person
(24:37):
was kind of had a tough time depending on where
your standing was in the sorority. Right. Similarly, if there
was somebody that was really important you know to you
that you wanted a sorority and maybe tanked. I mean,
one of my best friends, quite frankly, was horrible in
rush and Amy, you weren't there yet, and I sat
(25:01):
up and this was like really important to me, And
I stood up and I was like I would brush
my teeth next to her. That was like the line
that you wouldn't use. It was like best and final on.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
A real estate deal.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
And then your friends if you were quote popular and
the sorority would like vote for you to support your.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Friend getting in. And I don't think it's that way anymore,
is it? Back in our day? What I'll say is,
if you had enough juice, one person was very popular,
well liked in the sorority, they would have enough juice
to get somebody into the sorority or kill literally or
kill out. Can you remember it all, Nikki? When your
(25:44):
sister was going through rush, Like were you nervous? Like,
oh God, now I have to go into this meeting
and they're going to talk about my sister.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
I wasn't nervous her year because legacy mattered. It was
the year before you and I had three friends going
through it. One who was one of my best friends
and we rushed freshman year and she didn't get a house.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Two was my other best friend who was like dead
as a doorknob.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
I mean I was like walking by her and I'd
be like talk talk talk, you know. And then my
other friend was the sister of somebody who had graduated,
and you know, that didn't happen, and.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
So it was a rough Did you get all three in?
I did not? Did you get wan? And I got too?
Speaker 1 (26:31):
And it was a very and I was a sophomore, right,
so I was kind of nothing.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
It was a very rough rush for me.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
When you guys came along, I didn't know I had
met you and said be best friends with my sister.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
But it was Lisa, and she was it was going
to be no issue because legacy then it didn't matter, right,
And I was a legacy also.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
I will tell you at Texas. You know, legacy and
all that. At least in the fraternity, it still exists.
It's my understand with the sororities that it does not.
Speaker 5 (27:02):
No, but hometown votes still are a big deal.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
So so, Lily, that's an interesting question that Nikki brings up. So,
say there was a girl that you knew, how would
you convey that to your sisters, sorry to say sisters,
how would you convey that? Like, hey, you got to
get this girl in. Yeah, you're not.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
Having meetings, okay, well you do like work week prior
the week prior to rush recruitment. You basically we would
have a Now I'm really not supposed.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
To say this, but that's okay. Let it know.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
You would have a presentation of all of the girls
that you were you were looking out for that you
may like, even remotely new, Like this girl's super cute,
she likes to do this.
Speaker 5 (27:50):
Here's some fun facts about her.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Do you show their social media?
Speaker 4 (27:54):
Yeah, you show a picture of them, like the best
picture of them, and you put them in there and
you say you did not.
Speaker 6 (27:59):
Also go back and we had to submit pictures and that.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Would them well with letters, we had wreck letters.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
I had a flashback of Lily won't even know what
this is, that old timey thing. It was like a
big box and it had a light on it and
you would have to put the thing and the piece
of paper on the light thing and somehow the light
would then flash it to a screen like it was
eighteen hundreds. We had a pay phone. That's what we did.
Speaker 7 (28:42):
I mean there was no Also, did did you guys
have like during skits like we so fies would put
all the girls that were really wanted, like in the
first couple of rows.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
No, but you mentioned that, I think in an earlier episode,
and that was interesting. I don't think we were clever
enough to figure out how to get the the girls
you want the most into the front row. But we
knew we had a hit list. We did have a
hit We did have that. Yeah, yeah, And you would
also send a floater. Hey, Like if some like you know,
top notch Active was a floater, you'd be like, get
(29:16):
over there to so and so and get them in.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
But you had matched like your best sorry Lily Active
with the best rushie to make it.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
It was like a signing meeting. That's really what it was.
Speaker 4 (29:31):
Totally that all of that strategy is still very much
roud and you can even like we would have a
voting scale if you knew someone from home and you
were like, you really want it had to be one
way or the other. You had to be really strong
vote them, and it was called a hometown vote, and
you could only vote people zero or four. Zero would
(29:52):
mean she slept with my sister's boyfriend and whatever, she
cannot step foot in here, and you would probably try
to rally some of your friends and say unied hometown
voter to and give her a zero or because all
numbers about your score and about people who talked to
or you could be like, I love her so much,
as Amy said, I would brush my teeth next to her.
Speaker 6 (30:11):
What about did you guys get pro con pro thing?
Speaker 4 (30:14):
Then you just go into normal recruitment and you're talking
them and everyone gives scores. You don't have this thing
at the end of the day where everyone's like raising
their hand and rallying for one.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
Which is so interesting because the meeting was really more
important essentially than like the score, because you could really
get someone's score. They could have a low score and
you could get them up high. So pro con pro
for people listening. There was a method to the madness,
like they didn't want you just having these meetings where
you were like, I don't like her.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
But Amy, we could vote on everybody. But literally, isn't
it true? The only people who can vote is somebody
who actually had direct conversation or interaction with the with
the I'm sorry whatever, what do.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
You call the membership potential pms.
Speaker 4 (30:58):
It had a pan and m yes, yes, I yes,
But I think there are some things that happen under
the table that you do to try to get Like
if you're because everyone wants the best girls, and so
if I know someone from home and I'm like, we
need to get her in here, and God forbid, something
(31:19):
were to happen where she were in which happens all
the time, where she got dropped or whatever, I would try.
I would give her a hometown vote. I'm the only
person like who can do that. But then maybe I
would try to give my friends like say you know
her from home too, you give her a four from
a hometown vote, or you go out and talk to her.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
So pro con pro So everybody listening, that's like, what's
pro con pro? Well, you have to I mean it's
the word. We understand the definition of it, right, Yeah,
But I think people listening don't necessarily understand that. In
this meeting, they would go what do you think of NICKI?
And they might show your photo, and then one girl
could stand up from the room in this big dining
room and say, I went to high school with Nikki.
(31:58):
I love her. She's totally Kapa mater. She's amazing, she's
so smart. You know, she's studying to be a doctor.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
Right.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
But then somebody has the opportunity to stand up. You
have to stand up, if I remember, And then you say,
you know, I talked to her today and I thought
I thought she was a bit dull, you know, sorry
to say, but then you have to end on a pro,
like ending on something positive made it all okay, Like
that was sort of the theory, like she's a total whore,
(32:26):
but I liked your ear rings, yeah, Verry was. If
you ended on this pro, then really we weren't these
terrible people in this room talking about people. And I
remember I helped with Rush at a different school, Uzela,
and they had pro con pro but if they could
(32:48):
not figure out what to say, they would stand up
and say nice, sweet, cute and that actually meant voter out.
What about no comment not the same thing. Yeah, they basically,
but I think you're technically not supposed to say no comments.
So they would say a pro which was nice, sweet cute,
(33:08):
but it was code to the girls, noop, ugly fat
nor Now we never I never experienced anybody saying something
in a meeting. I will say, and we'll end on this,
somebody's saying something about somebody's appearance. That would be that
is I never experienced that. I don't know about the
(33:30):
rest of you, but I never had it in a
meeting where somebody was talking about somebody's I.
Speaker 6 (33:34):
Don't remember it being blatant, but certainly there it was there.
It was hanging out.
Speaker 3 (33:39):
If you have a bunch of rushies or pnms or
whatever you want to call them, coming through, we're talking
about who went into the two front rows or like
it was the prettier girls. I mean, that was just
and I think that's you cannot deny that that's a.
Speaker 6 (33:53):
Big effort all of this. It just is, you know,
what is a top tier sorority. I think that it's
you know, a lot of.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
Times it's dick bait, right, it's the hot girls to
get like the guys and vice versa. Right, And so
even if you look at the tiktoks for sority Rush,
which I watch and thank god I don't have girls,
and I see the girls with their dance moves and
how hot they are.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
And how like sexy they are, and I'm like, oh
my god.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
And there was one TikTok that showed like Rush in
the eighties and nineties compared to Rush now and it
was like bargain basement like posters, handmade posters and so different,
so different.
Speaker 5 (34:35):
Can I give you the Greek rank what it says
for Kappa?
Speaker 2 (34:40):
Definitely good way to end this episode.
Speaker 5 (34:43):
Okay, so how you read Greek rank.
Speaker 4 (34:45):
It's not the actual rankings that are posted, but you
have to go into the discussion section because those are
real people.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
Okay, it's like Reddit and people like Reddit.
Speaker 4 (34:54):
Yeah, like Reddit like people will up arrow it and
down aarrow it if it's right.
Speaker 5 (34:58):
So on August we do.
Speaker 4 (35:01):
They said for the rank for the sorority rankings at
cal Top, it says Kappa one hundred and forty years
of recruiting powerful, rich connected women.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Oh girls.
Speaker 6 (35:15):
So anyway, you guys amazing, right, how lingos have.
Speaker 3 (35:19):
Some things change. The more things change, I never.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
Know whether to like end these episodes feeling like a
little giggle, a little love, or if I need hour.
It's sort of all of the above.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
I feel the same way I loved being in a sorority.
I know my daughter loved being in a sorority. And
then sometimes I think, how in the world could you
have ever been in a sorority?
Speaker 6 (35:39):
How dare you?
Speaker 2 (35:40):
I think it's gotten worse, Like.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
Yeah, it's a vicious it's a lot of good, maybe
some bad as well, but anyway, thanks you guys so much.
Speaker 6 (35:49):
Love talking lingo with you.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
Bye.
Hosts And Creators
Ben Higgins
Ashley Iaconetti
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