September 6, 2025 • 41 mins
A modern day gladiator, Meghan King is suited up to defend her honor. After allegations and headlines threatened to ruin her reputation (and her career), Meghan is ready to show that divorce has made her a fighter!
She breaks down why it’s crucial for women to support women, in addition to the real dark side of fame and how it can make a divorce even messier.
Plus, we get her unfiltered reaction to recent comments a former OC housewife made on her possible return to the franchise!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
It's I Do Part two and it's your favorite real
life single Gal Louise back on with you. I'm excited
today because I've got a guest who's been on the
pod before. We love her because she keeps it authentic, honest,
and most importantly real. You know her from Real Housewives
of OC. It's Megan King. Hi, Megan, Nice to meet you.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Ky Louise, Nice to meet you as well.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
So let's jump in. I know you have a lot
that you want to talk about today, and on this
pod we talk not just about divorces and dating, but
also the mess that comes after divorce. I'm divorced, so
I got you from your own experience. What's it like
going through the mess and also being in the pub
(01:00):
like I at the same time.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I mean, it's been almost six years for me, so
I'm divorced, and I've been divorced for quite some years now.
But it seems as if when you know, whenever you
just one decides willingly that they're going to be a
public figure, as I did when I signed up for
the Real Housewives of Orange County, it doesn't go away.
It's you signing a deal with the devil and you
(01:23):
gotta handle it, you know, whatever life throws your way
after that. And for me, life through divorce my way
and a very public messy one. I was married to
another public figure and it's it's now the press and
combined with whatever celebrity I may have earned from the Housewives,
has exposed me to the masses, you know, the population
(01:50):
as a villain or you know, however my ex wants
to paint me as or anyone who has anything against
me and so, and this isn't just a typical story
with me. It's a typical story with most people going
through any sort of you know, divorce or high stakes debate, conflict, conflict. Yeah, exactly,
(02:13):
it sucks.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
It really does. Do you actually think that your platform
that you've built is being used against you? Oh?
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
M M.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
I think that When I went in the Real Housewives
Orange County, I showed my life as we do, and
people fall in love with me or they or they
learned to hate me through what you see on TV.
So people feel like they know me. And then I
extend that to my social media. I carefully cultivated my
social media following on Instagram, and I showed people the
real me and they do know me, and so they
(02:45):
have strong opinions about that. Now my ex husband, or
just anyone in general who's an athlete. They are known
for their skill and not their personal lives, and so
no one really truly cares about if you know, Joe
Schmoe hockey player is getting divorced from beautiful Susie Q
(03:07):
because nobody knows Susie C And nobody really cares about
Joe Shmo's personal life. They care about how many goals
he's scoring in the Stanley Cup. So unfortunately, in my situation,
you have, you know, two people with platforms. But I
think my platform is the one where people, well, I know,
my platform is the one there are people care about
my personal life. They like to watch the mess they
like to watch that train wreck and my and because
(03:31):
I have that, it's like anybody who wants to paint
me in any sort of light can push that narrative
out to the press, and I'm the one that has
to deal with the fallout, not the baseball fans, not
the one who put it there. It's me.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
It's actually really really painful. I live in Los Angeles.
I see all the time in the entertainment world as well,
and you know there's usually one person. A lot of
times it's us that is kind of like odd man out,
pushed out, and it's it's very painful. I can speak
to that. Do you think that there's any way at
this point for you to course correct the damage now
(04:09):
that it's been done, or do you come to a
point where it's I'm just not even to try to
prove myself. I know who I am the people in
my life that know me authentically, and I'm not going
to sit here and try to like convince those people.
Otherwise it's become entertainment for them, right, It's fodder for
them because they're boring and they need to get a life. Okay, yes,
(04:30):
So where do you sit on it? Do you feel
compelled to try to clean it up? Or are you
just like, eh, whatever.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
I think it's a combination of all of that. Yes,
of course, the people who know me are going to
know who I am, who the real me is, and
they're going to support me no matter what. Or they're
going to come to me with the true story and
then that's that. Right, I'll tied up in a nice
little bow. But that doesn't mean that the Court of
public opinion has has heard that or believes that, and
that is very important for me. I'm a real turn now.
(04:57):
I have shifted my life for Jet Deory from being
a public figure to really focusing on being a midbost mom,
single mom. You've started a new career that in the
middle of life. I mean, that's a daunting thing to do.
So I'm kind of straddling this world where I'm like, Okay,
I do need to defend myself a little bit in
(05:19):
order to control the narrative, to control my reputation so
that I can continue to get sales.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Well, that's what I was going to ask you. I'm
a realtor too. Has it impacted your business or no?
Because of all the sexy real estate shows and there
are a lot of people that like having the celebrity
also as part of their representative.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
People don't want their Sotheby's agent, their high end me
Sothibe's agent to be this, you know, selling sunset girl.
Speaker 4 (05:49):
No.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
I live in country club, high end Saint Louis, Missouri.
I'm in the middle of the country. It's very Southern
traditional and it on one hand, and it's great because
we protect one another in our community. And our individuals.
On the other hand, it's a small big town, so
everybody knows everything, and word travels fast, and so if
that word is true or not true, it doesn't matter.
(06:11):
Everybody's going to know, going to hear about it. And yes,
it has effect of my business because I have had
quote unquote haters call my brokerage to try to get
me fired and tried to get me kicked off of
a real estate team I was on. And then yesterday
as an article and US Weekly came out, I had
to meet with my broker to explain the real story.
(06:32):
And you know what, gratefully and I'm so grateful my
actions have spoken louder than my words over the last year,
thank God, because my broker says she wouldn't even open
the article. She has seen her yes, and that speaks
for itself.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
So exactly empowered you and you had proven yourself to her.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
Yep, yep, yep. So that felt That feels really good.
But that takes time. That takes to build that trust
and to show people who you truly are. You can't
just tell. That takes time, and so this has been
a huge lesson in the arena of patients for me.
Because I cannot fix the way people think about me,
and other than saying something, if they're not going to
(07:12):
believe me it, I just have to show them over time.
And that is a very freaking humbling experience.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
It is because you have to. So you're living your
life authentically and true to who you are right at
the same time, still obviously posting on social media to
create that and continue that and get clients and show
them that you know how to handle their biggest investments, right,
which is a big deal, and being discreet because we
know everybody's finances. So it's like kind of a big jumble.
(07:42):
And it's almost like, do you, as you're continuing to
curate a bunch of different avenues in your life, do
you feel that you worry that certain things can come
back to bite you that maybe you didn't think about
as much?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Then Oh, my gosh, absolutely, yeah, yes, yes, yes, I
think this is a very like time honored story. Right.
Everybody kind of has their story, especially if you've been
in the public eye. And my days in the public
eye started when I was thirty years old. I'm now
forty almost forty one, and so yeah, I did stupid
stuff when I was thirty that I wouldn't have done today,
or maybe or I should say, in the throes of
(08:19):
a contentious divorce that was well unfolding in the public eye.
At the same time, I found out that my baby
had cerebral palsy and COVID hit. So yeah, I'm gonna
I think that it's suffice to say that one would
probably make some decisions that they might not during a
time like that.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Do you feel like people give you grace on that
or no?
Speaker 3 (08:41):
I don't know. I think I was in such a
tornado at the time I couldn't see my way out
of it. Now, looking back, I think that people meaning that,
like the fans who don't are people who don't know me.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
No, there was no grace. She's crazy.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
She's like, oh look at her spiraling, she's so pathetic
or sad or drama she married him for the money,
or she got this coming, whatever it is they want
to say. But now I think it's it's like they
can watch me and I either continue down whatever path
that was, which was using the media to really try
to vilify my ex husband at the time because I
(09:17):
didn't know which way was up, and I regret doing that.
I think it was messy and tacky, and I'm upset
that I made those choices because now my children are
going to see that one day, or they could if
they want to search it. I will be honest with them.
I knew at the time that they would see it
one day, but I thought, you know, this is true,
This is all true, and I'm gonna be able to
(09:39):
have a strong relationship with my kids where I can
explain that to them. Now, even with that clarity, I
still regret it. But all I can do is change
my approach going forward. But it doesn't really matter if
all of it's in the past, it still comes back
to haunt me. And that's just you know, the bed
that I made, and no I'm laying in it.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
But here's the good news. As somebody who's been divorced
longer than you and who's older than you is you're human.
Lots of people go through very messy divorces that people
love to tune into it, and I hear it all
the time. So and so it is with the pickleball coach,
this personette, whatever, they move on to their own step.
At the end of the day, they're focused on themselves
(10:17):
and other stories that's right. Come up, and you're right
because you will have the relationship with your children. And
you say, guys, it's painful getting divorced, and I hope
that never happens to you. And we're all doing the
best we can. But I love you with my entire heart,
and I'm here and they'll be fine. Kids are resilient, period, right.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
And I just want to be authentic for them and
say when I screw up, but yes, And I think
we all kind of embrace those short sales or short
news cycles and hope that you know, everything blows over
and always does. It just takes a couple of days.
But when stuff hits mainstream media like US Weekly, and
it just it gets out of the blogs into the mainstream,
that's when it starts to bother me. Because you're not
(10:54):
just dealing with the people in their basements with their
hand on their pants.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
Typing on Reddit all day long.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
These are professionals who are going to browse through headlines
and they're going to see that US Weekly headlines. So
that's when it really kind of starts to hit a
little closer to home.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
I totally understand. Do you have people close to you
that you feel support you that have gone through similar situations,
Like if somebody else has walked your path, it feels
like a safer kind of space that you feel supportive
worre you know, instead of somebody who doesn't get it
and you're like, you just don't get it, Like, do
you feel like you've seen other people in these very
similar toxic kind of situations.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
I mean, I think my own personal situation is so
highly unique because of my exposure on the Housewives, being
married to a professional athlete, and then the other you know,
minutia that comes with the rest of my story. But
I think that fame, and that's kind of the platform
that I'm speaking to right now. I think that fame, money,
(11:51):
influence good looks. I think that there's currency to all
of those things as well. And so because of that
and the perception of you know that, like fame is
this elite person or money makes someone elite or whatever
it is, how we perceive, you know, this currency that
someone has a lot of. It's like we want to
(12:13):
watch what it looks like to take them down. And so, yeah,
I might not have the the like direct comparison to me,
but I do have friends who have you know, a
lot of money that people are trying to get to
or take them down or create rumors about them or
friends who you know are in politics or whatever. And
(12:35):
so I think that we need to think about this issue,
not even just you know, being a celebrity, but it's
like sticking it to the proverbial man. And I represent
as a celebrity some sort of proverbial man that people
like to see fall on their on their knees, and
because it kind of helps our simpletons feel better about themselves.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
But it's like the person who's driving and the you know,
there's a car accident, everybody slows down to look. I mean,
it's like it's sad that people want. People are envious,
people are unhappy inherently right now, right, and people want
to see beautiful, rich, successful people that were at the
top of their game fall right, and also kind of
normalizes their own experiences too. So yeah, it's it's like
(13:20):
super super painful.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
I also think, Louise, that this is kind of like
the modern day version of gladiators, like back in the
Roman times, where it's just all these spectators gather around
to watch a blood bath. It's not about what's fair
or how they got there in the first place. It's
not even that they even you don't even know if
they want to be there. Like I think there are
(13:42):
mostly like bad guys that were just like plucked out
for people's entertainment. But I'm one of those gladiators right now.
I'm just in a different arena and I never asked
to be that gladiator. Somebody pulled me in there, and
now I'm a spectacle and it does not matter how
I get out of it, because it's not the truth
that matters. It's the narrative that matters, and that's what
(14:03):
the court of opinion will decide.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
And you have to You're going to continue to negate
that narrative by people like your broker who supported you
and didn't you know, read the article and subscribe to it.
You're gonna do great work with your clients, and you're
gonna build your people around you that you can trust,
that know you, and.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
Then yeah, that's all you can do. I mean, it's
difficult to not get angry in the in the meantime,
you know, when you're building up that trust, like once again,
back to the virtue of patients. It's been a huge challenge,
but that's all that it is. And I told my
kids that, you know, because as my children, my four
sweet children, are products of this very contentious divorce between
(14:39):
their parents. Sometimes they'll hear different things from different sides,
and they'll say, well, somebody, you know, basically somebody's line.
And I'll say to my children, listen, I'm telling you
the truth, but there is no way that you can
know that unless until time happens. So you're gonna so
I'm gonna help you with this, and I'm gonna say,
all right, this is what I said.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Now let's wait till it happens. Blah blah, you know.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
And so I'm trying to teach them like that trust
is built up over time, which is a sad lesson
for seven and eight year.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Old kids because they should always trust their parents.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Do they go back and forth even lead to both houses?
Speaker 2 (15:13):
No, it's not no, it's not even no, it's.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Not even okay, God, Yeah, well, I guess let's talk
about what happens when you're in a contentious divorce and
then there's new partners, because that brings a whole other
kind of animal to it.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I never knew what it would be, what it was
like without a new partner, because I think it was
like I think we'd been maybe split up, like two months,
maybe less.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
I think it might have been less.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
It was okay, we split up the end of October
twenty nineteen, and before twenty twenty hit he was living
with his current.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Well it's over it's overlap.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Yeah, it's overlap.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
It's overlap, which makes it really hard then for the
ex wife and the new woman to be on this
same page.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Right, I don't have a relationship with with his new wife,
so that I don't know. I mean, I think it
would be better for the kids if we did, but
it's it could be worse. I suppose it.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Well, the problem is that the kids are still young, right,
So if there was the ability where everybody could be
some sort of you know, modern family that can you know,
do holidays together and trips and you know, sit at
parent teacher conference is great.
Speaker 3 (16:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Do you feel that you don't have to answer this
like who's the puppeteer in that relationship? Like who's who's
perpetuating the drama that exists now between like you and
her that's making it this way.
Speaker 3 (16:37):
I don't think there is drama between us I don't
talk to her. I don't like, I don't know, Like,
I don't think there is any there's nothing there, there's
no relationship. It's like it's basically like I see a
picture and she's a ghost, you know, it's to me
kind of idea. I like. I like the role that
she plays because she provides consistency for my children. She
(16:59):
sounds like she's calm for the most part as far
as like what my children say to me, and they
like her, So I don't have any problem with her,
Like any issues that she would have with me are
secondary information. They're not you know, she hasn't derived her
opinions about me directly from my relation our relationship. They're
(17:22):
all third party opinions that she's taking a talk yeah yeah,
pillow talk. So I don't but I don't know her
and I don't try to know her. It's she's whatever
to me, except that my kids like her, so that's fine,
and she's not good.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
So what I what I appreciate from you, Megan, is
you actually seem super neutral on it, right, which is
really the best kind of place to be. So maybe
do you think that there could be a world or
what would it take for the situation between the two
of you to be more comfortable.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
I guess between my ex and myself and.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Like any even that, like after a contentious divorce, like
is it time is like what is it? What do
you think can eventually bring people back to you know,
kind of a calm place where you just say, like,
you're a dad, I'm the mom. These are Look, here's
the thing with divorce people. You can get remarried. He
can be remarried. Those three kids belong to the two
of you.
Speaker 4 (18:19):
Yeah, okay, do you think you seem like a girl's
girl to me in the conversation of talking to Right,
So it's important for women to support women, period, Okay, Right, So.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
It seems that a lot of times this is not
the case. I've personally experienced this with people with my
own friends, and it's like a heartbreak. Yes, why do
you think it's important for women to support women? Would
that create.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I think that I think that, like basically, our culture
has groomed us to think that the way that women
communicate is negative or caddy or bad because women are
emotional and they talk about what's going on more small
talk than you know, broad talk like men would stereotypically
(19:22):
be classified as I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
I think that water cooler conversation is some of the
most important conversations in order to keep our communities safe
and and like families, you know, up to date and knowledgeable.
So having said that, fast forward, you know, past your
water cooler days, and here we are today and we
(19:44):
are trying we try to say, like, you know, gossip
is bad, let's reframe that. Like if we can reframe
gossip as being good, as being women helping one another,
then we could be so much more powerful as a sex.
And I think that you know, we're as women, we
are more emotional, but we're all so much more peaceful.
And I think we just want to love everyone more,
(20:07):
so we feel more attached to any sort of you know,
emotionally charged situation. So it can divide us in a
lot of ways, but generally speaking, I think we're all
talking about the same thing, and we're all the generally
the underdog in the situation. Don't even get me started
on family court with.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
That, you know, what's a good idea? Actually, just like
there's life coaches, or there should be a divorce coach.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
I think there are Oh well.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
It's like there's rush, you know, somebody's going through rush.
Like a divorce coach should almost be in contentious situations,
should be mandated by the courts or the lawyers or something.
I mean they have that our family wizard. Yeah, in
terms of are you guys using that for that?
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Oh gosh, oh just got two messages on it, Louise.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
Paper trail is so important.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Yeah, well it doesn't seem like anybody cares though, well
they don't.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
I mean, it's so true, but a divorce coach would
be so good in terms of kind of navigating and.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
And what to say. I think language is so important.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
Like there's certain like like trigger words that I think
the courts hate hearing, which are alienation narcissists. You know,
they hate those words. But if you can describe the behaviors,
that's okay.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
Yeah, no, it's it's it's true. Do you find that
it sounds like in your situation because it's content or
maybe not whatever? Are you are your two household? It
doesn't sound like you guys are on the same parenting page, right,
So there's a lot of kind of re entry, right,
so they come your house, there's like major unwinding of
(21:49):
kind of an unpacking of that and that house, and
then you've got to read bulls to them, to you
and yours and probably right or true, and then they
go back and it's this like repeat thing of Groundhog's Day,
which is so hard to do. It's hard for these kids.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
I mean, I mean, well, you have to understand, I
was a stepmom before I was a biological mother, and
so I saw this this you know, game being played
by this this dance, if you will, between the houses.
I had that with my step kids, and those two
households were much more on the same page than mine is.
(22:27):
But I wouldn't go to great lengths to say that
it was on the same page. But I just think
that's like, I think it's easy to say, Okay, if
we were on the same page, there would be easy
re entry. But I don't agree with that. I think
the re entry is going to be tough no matter
the situation. Children thrive on routine, and switching houses is
not routine. This is not how it was meant to
(22:48):
be done. And so pointing fingers at are ex's is
so easy to do, but really just sucks.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Divorce sucks, and the people who get hurt are the kids? Yep?
Are you a product divorce?
Speaker 3 (23:00):
No, My parents have been married fifty years in May.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Did you grow up in the Midwest?
Speaker 3 (23:06):
Yep. Born and raised Saint Louis, Missouri, oldest of four kids,
Irish Catholic. My parents are so in love, my dad writes,
my mom loves notes that I'll find. My mom was
over at my house last night, just hanging out with
me and my kids, and my dad just drove by
and popped out, kicked the soccer ball with the kids.
I'm talking Americana right here. I grew up in a
really great way. I couldn't have written the script better myself,
(23:28):
and kind of think it hit me up, honestly because
I thought that that's what I was going to get,
and the boy was I in for surprise.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Well, you know, it's interesting because I'm a product of
a tough divorce and I made bad choices, my sister,
I mean, just whatever relationship choices.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
Yeah, of course. And you know I can kind of
under I know what my baggage is right now after
this many years of doing it, like I understand where
it comes from. Super hard to unwind it at.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Fifty totally.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
More clarity though, Yes, but we have default behaviors. It's
very hard I see, yes, right. But it's funny because
a very few people where I live in Los Angeles,
most people are divorced, and I can count on one
hand of my big group of friends two couples that
I think are genuinely happy, okay, And it's interesting to
(24:25):
really kind of take stock of whose parents are still
married and in love and the environment that they grew
up in. And I would say most of the happily
married people are the ones that grew up in that
environment because that example was healthy and so it continued.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
It didn't occur to me that there's bad people in
the world because the only thing that occurred to me
was that people show up authentically in relationship, especially you know,
a partnership. And when that didn't happen, that was just
mind boggling for me. But I thought I had this
great family that could fix him.
Speaker 1 (25:01):
You know.
Speaker 3 (25:02):
I saw that his childhood was more challenging than mine.
My heart goes out to anyone with those any challenges
in childhood. It's not your fault. And I would never.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Blame him for the way he was raised. Or how
that painted him.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
But he's a grown up now, and so if he's
not able to overcome, like you said, even those patterns
are hard to overcome. But you're a grown up now
and it's up to you, you know, to decide if
you're going to let that shape you or not. Now,
I thought that all he needed was, oh, here's a
stable family, and here's good people, and here's Sunday dinners.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
No, that's that's nice.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
That's his childhood wounds in all of his baggage set.
But you know, to your point, like such, when people
choose to have children and there's eyes on us at
all times, like we don't want to continue to perpetuate
the cycle. Right, So it's almost like, okay, so maybe
he didn't get off scott free, or you didn't get
it off scott free, or I didn't, but like you know,
(26:00):
the onus is on us to try to do it differently,
for them to see it differently, right, So you know,
hopefully he'll get there to do that with you.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
I mean, I think I'm on my own journey as well.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
You know, this is not what I thought my life
would look like as a mother and at all, and
this is not the type of mother I thought I
would be. I think I thought I would be a
lot better mom. I have a lot of stress taking
up my time and energy, like lawsuit with my ex
being a major one, and I can't like, once again,
(26:34):
I can't just point the finger at my ex saying
like you drew me in a lawsuit or whatever. I'm
still there, you know, like I'm still in it as well,
and I have to be able to prioritize my values
in order to give my kids the best chance. And
hopefully I'm not totally poking them up.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
Well, I don't think you are, because I think what
they're seeing is a real vulnerability. You know, they'll listen
to this, They'll they know who you are. They can
look in your eyes. You have kind eyes. They're also
around your parents, and they're around that unit, so as
much as maybe they're feeling that kind of family love,
devotion and all of that. So I do think that
it takes a village, and I think you have a village.
(27:16):
You're not alone on that No, it might be on
purely on one side of the fence, because you're not
there in conjunction with your ex husband, but you have
a lot of people they are loving and supporting to
lead by example.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
And I think that's huge and that is a system
that I put in place that I'm proud of myself
that I did for my children because I think there's
you know, a lot of different factors that go into
created in person and who they turn out to be.
And you hear these miraculous stories of these kids with
horrible childhoods who turn out to do great things in life,
and they're quote unquote miraculous stories, but I disagree. I
(27:50):
don't think they're miraculous because the common denominator and all
of those success stories are these children were surrounded by
community with good positive examples. And so when these kids
didn't have you know, their buckets filled at home, they
could find it within the community that they were surrounded by.
And I have at least been able to provide that
for my children. So if I took up in all
(28:12):
the ways, and their dad's up in all the ways,
hopefully their community can carry them through. So at least
I got that right.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
And you know, don't, Megan, don't underestimate what you're showing
them by getting a career working being a strong woman,
like I will tell you. My kids have watched it
and as they went to college, they really commented on that.
So you're setting an incredible example to your child.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
Yeah, I think I am. I hear them talk about it.
They're very proud of me. They like to talk about
how I'm a realtor and I've taken them to houses
and they like to talk about how they went to
work with mommy, and they are proud. It's really cool
to see. And it's not just the work, but I
think it's just something that they like to see that
their mom is doing things that that like are outside
(29:01):
just the norm of.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
You're doing something for yourself and you're making a difference.
And I think it's a really good example. But just
wait till you start taking them to listings of yours
that are not within your reach to buy. That happened
my kids like why do we live here? I'm like,
not in mom's wheelhouse. Sorry. Home is the people, not
the structure.
Speaker 3 (29:20):
My eggs had, you know, this massive, massive, massive, twenty
thousand square foot home and I don't. And so my
kids would used to say to me, well, why don't
we have a bowling now in the basement? Mom? But
when down there why don't we have many golfer a
slide or in a pool, And and so I'm used
to that, which is my kids are used to that.
But you know what, my daughter and my kids, they
(29:42):
feel the energy. And one of my favorite stories, my
daughter's friend's parents just got separated and the mom moved
from a nice house to a little, you know, two
bedroom house, and my daughter, Aspen was picked up from
her dad's house or is twenty thousand square foot brand new,
we're just mansion, and to go to this girl's house.
(30:03):
And she said this. Mom told me that my daughter
Aspen walks in and goes into this little girl's room
and says, oh my gosh, this is the coolest room
I've ever seen. I wish my room looked like this,
and she meant it.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
It's she truly did.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
And the mom told me that she started to cry
so like it's that means the world to me. That
tells me right there that I'm doing something.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Okay, I always lived in a smaller house and place
than my ex husband did, and I didn't quite have
the access and the perks and the trips and the
I mean I really and it was hard for me
at times like I kind of felt less than.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
And I get it.
Speaker 1 (30:40):
I said to my kids one day and I said, look,
and I've always taught them this, and I actually hear
them repeating it, so I know they're absorbing it. So
this is a good one for you to remember. Okay, right,
OM is the people. It's not the structure that's cute.
That's great, and they have learned it, and I, over
the years have felt badly when I can't, you know,
(31:02):
take them to Japan and get them, you know, floor ceasier,
and I feel kind of like I suck, I'm a loser.
And they have said to me, Mom, we love you
for you and we're proud of you. And it doesn't
that it does. And I really believe it, I really
really and my kids are in their twenties.
Speaker 3 (31:20):
They do believe it because it's true. And I can't
do those things for my kids either, but I'm proud
of what I can do. I couldn't take my daughter
to Portugal to Lisbon to go see Taylor Swift this
year with VIPs, but you know what I could do.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
I took her to the.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
Outskirts of Saint Louis and I took her to a
Taylor Swift cover band during the Era's tour, you know,
and she had a blast. And it's like it's it's
just I think so much about the effort and curating
an experience and the time together that.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
I think it's the time. I think it's the time.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
So much more important than anything else, you know. And
I can't afford vacation, crazy elaborate vacations. But I can't
afford to spend money on myself. Was credit card and
get some points and buy tickets for my kids. You know,
I am.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Scrapped, Darlin, I'm kidding, are you?
Speaker 3 (32:11):
I'm both? Actually? Yeah, I do whatever I can and
I get and I get creative with it and scrappy
with it. And I'm proud of myself and I hope
I know my kids see the work that I put
into it.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
So here's another really good thing. And it's something I
started to do. And again, your kids sound old enough
to start doing it. A couple of things. First of all,
I would sit at the dinner table and we I
don't think. I don't know if your kids have phones yet.
Usually kids would divorce do because.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
They have like iPads. But I don't have phone numbers
for them.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Okay, So you sit at the table without devices. Okay,
I got it, and you will be shocked at how
observant and smart kids are at different ages and start
asking open ended questions things like this. If you were
to describe mom and dad separately in three words good
(33:08):
or bad to people who don't know them, what would
you say?
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Oh, that's cute.
Speaker 1 (33:13):
You will be shocked by the answer because they get it. Okay,
and never one What is your happiest memory to date?
I mean, there's so many questions, and I can send
you where I got most of them. But there's an
app you can download called Wholesome holsom and it has
all types of categories of open ended questions, whether it's
(33:36):
for kids of this age, or relationships or humor. And
it makes the conversation at the dinner table more connected,
more textured, and more memorable. And it's going to bring you, guys,
really closer, and I get it's going to show your depth,
and it's going to show you it's going to allow
you to show them who you are because you're going
to answer the same questions. And it's also going to
(33:58):
allow them to feel comfort to have real conversations with you,
and then you're going to eliminate the surface, like how
was school today good? Did you write your friends or Dick?
Speaker 3 (34:07):
I forgot?
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Yeah, like it just makes for a really great, really
good And then the other thing I always did too,
which was important, was to sounds stupid, but you know
everywhere we went, whether it was at night after I
made them. My kids were third and fifth grade, they
were young like yours, and I had each kid pick
a TV show that they were going to watch with me,
(34:30):
and then when they went to dad's house they couldn't
watch it, and then they would come back and it
would be our time together the show. And then the
other thing is Rummy Cube. I don't know if you
play a game with the kids. We do, okay, So
Rubny Cube was like it was easy, it was you know,
you could take it on trips, you could play it
at home, and it was just time spent together to
(34:50):
build the foundation. Because when they get older, they kind
of go out and they're living their lives, which is
what you want. You want them to launch.
Speaker 3 (34:59):
We do. I feel like we do the game Sorry
Uno and Monopoly on repeat. We constantly have a family
puzzle out, so everybody has the role, you know, and
we all sit there whenever, you know, to do the
family puzzle and our but our favorite thing to do
together as a family is hop on our golf cart
(35:22):
and every Sunday we take the cardboard to the recycling center,
which is in our little downtown. Yeah. So like we do.
I really try to do like the absolute most that
I can for my children, and I love it and
they have we have these traditions together that they'll always remember,
you know.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
But that's my point. It doesn't matter we ride our.
Speaker 3 (35:44):
Bikes into the farmer's market and they you know, stuff
like that.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
It's the time spent and the activity and the memory.
It's not the you know, whipping on a private plane.
Speaker 3 (35:53):
And no whatever, which is cool too, by the way,
which is really cool too.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
They're not gonna get from mama.
Speaker 1 (35:59):
No, no, no, no, honestly, what's more important is the small
things and finding joy and appreciation and value in the
small things period. And you're doing that, and you're also
showing them community service too, which is giving back.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
Yeah, that's true, it is, and being an active member
of the community. We go to the local performing arts center,
we're involved in the community center. I do all the things.
I'm such a Midwest mom and like, this is how
I was raised and I'm doing the same thing for
my kids. But I think my first, So my first,
I'm forty one, almost forty one. I'll at least live
(36:35):
to be eighty. So I have you, know less.
Speaker 1 (36:37):
Than half fill twenty five?
Speaker 3 (36:39):
Okay, okay, so holy seventy five more years? Then?
Speaker 1 (36:42):
All right, so I have you for a few more minutes.
I'm just gonna ask a couple more things.
Speaker 5 (36:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, So house wives fans, Well, first of all,
is there anything else now that you have this floor
in this platform that you want to say to address
any of the stuff that's kind of recently been out there,
you know, kind of this is your time to just
(37:06):
hit it home one more time, or do you feel
like you've got out what you wanted to say?
Speaker 3 (37:12):
What I want to say is just super high level
and it's not in the weeds with me specifically. I'm
so over being in the press and the drama that
relates to me specifically. I think that I'm here for
like to try to give voice to a bigger message
here that celebrity is more accessible than ever with the advent,
and like proliferation of reality television, and so it's easy,
(37:36):
it's easier than ever to consume media and to also
use media to villainize others. And I think that it's
just important to be mindful as we scroll through our
phones that of the repercussions that can be held on
these individuals.
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Okay, so Housewive fans have been wanting you to come
back to the OC franchise.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
They have recently.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Your former cast member Vicky, who isn't even on the
show anymore, said no when a fan suggested that you
come back, Soper off, How does that comment make you feel?
And I don't know, do you see you don't live
there anymore? But would you ever go back if they offered?
Or are you pretty set being back with your family
(38:24):
doing real estate, being around the Midwest values none of
that kind of you know, flashy glamorama type stuff and
like hunkering down. Is it a different stage of your
life or does that calling still kind.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Of I'm into all of that.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
It's just like on a more adult level, if you will,
I not missed thirty year old level. I told Alex Baskin,
he's one of the executive producers that I'm open.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
I would be interested in being a friend.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
I told, oh, and I'm friends with I'm friends with
Tracy Tudor, I'm friends with She's she's a real estate
agent on TV Million Dollars Listening, and then so and
I'm friends with Jeff Lewis, who's also in real estate.
So I think it would be fun to do real
estate in California, but I don't have my license. I
mean it's a pipe dream, you know. It's kind of
(39:16):
like playing in house in my head.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
But yeah, i'd go back.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
You would do a real estate show, but maybe not
a housewive back to that whole.
Speaker 3 (39:22):
I don't know if I want to be like on
for my life as much, but I would like to
be a friend that they don't really like dig into
your life as a friend.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
I got it Vicky Is.
Speaker 3 (39:34):
I thought it was funny that she even responded to that,
because like, Vicky doesn't give a fuck about me. I
can promise you that I don't know about her, and
so it's funny that like it's still this beef is
still out there. I think it's kind of cute.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
It's cute, and I think it's also people's way of
still kind of being like relevant.
Speaker 3 (39:51):
In the mix. Yeah, right, we look, we're talking about it.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
We're talking about it. So yeah, it's kind of like
I would teach my kids, like even if somebody's talking,
they're talking about you, it means you matter. It's true, right,
if people aren't talking about you, then like you're irrelevant. Well, Megan,
thank you so much for the honest thanks. I know
many of us you have gone through divorce. They're going
(40:17):
through divorce. Many of my friends are family members, very relatable,
and each time I tell my kids people we know
are getting divorced, they look at me like this, doesn't
everyone get divorced. So I've got a lot to unwind there.
So maybe I'm gonna ship them to the Midwest and
they'd have a better opportunity. Anyways, if you're going through
a difficult divorce and feel like you aren't moving in
(40:39):
a positive direction or you need some help, call us
or email us all the infos in the show notes,
follow us on socials, and make sure to rate and
review the podcast. I do Part two an iHeartRadio podcast
where falling in love is the main objective. And let's
hope your chapter two and my chapter two are like
(41:00):
better and they're.
Speaker 3 (41:01):
Moving on right into the sunset.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
Gotcha all right, Take care, Thanks BYEEE
It's I Do Part two and it's your favorite real
life single Gal Louise back on with you. I'm excited
today because I've got a guest who's been on the
pod before. We love her because she keeps it authentic, honest,
and most importantly real. You know her from Real Housewives
of OC. It's Megan King. Hi, Megan, Nice to meet you.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Ky Louise, Nice to meet you as well.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
So let's jump in. I know you have a lot
that you want to talk about today, and on this
pod we talk not just about divorces and dating, but
also the mess that comes after divorce. I'm divorced, so
I got you from your own experience. What's it like
going through the mess and also being in the pub
(01:00):
like I at the same time.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I mean, it's been almost six years for me, so
I'm divorced, and I've been divorced for quite some years now.
But it seems as if when you know, whenever you
just one decides willingly that they're going to be a
public figure, as I did when I signed up for
the Real Housewives of Orange County, it doesn't go away.
It's you signing a deal with the devil and you
(01:23):
gotta handle it, you know, whatever life throws your way
after that. And for me, life through divorce my way
and a very public messy one. I was married to
another public figure and it's it's now the press and
combined with whatever celebrity I may have earned from the Housewives,
has exposed me to the masses, you know, the population
(01:50):
as a villain or you know, however my ex wants
to paint me as or anyone who has anything against
me and so, and this isn't just a typical story
with me. It's a typical story with most people going
through any sort of you know, divorce or high stakes debate, conflict, conflict. Yeah, exactly,
(02:13):
it sucks.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
It really does. Do you actually think that your platform
that you've built is being used against you? Oh?
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Yeah, I do.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
M M.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
I think that When I went in the Real Housewives
Orange County, I showed my life as we do, and
people fall in love with me or they or they
learned to hate me through what you see on TV.
So people feel like they know me. And then I
extend that to my social media. I carefully cultivated my
social media following on Instagram, and I showed people the
real me and they do know me, and so they
(02:45):
have strong opinions about that. Now my ex husband, or
just anyone in general who's an athlete. They are known
for their skill and not their personal lives, and so
no one really truly cares about if you know, Joe
Schmoe hockey player is getting divorced from beautiful Susie Q
(03:07):
because nobody knows Susie C And nobody really cares about
Joe Shmo's personal life. They care about how many goals
he's scoring in the Stanley Cup. So unfortunately, in my situation,
you have, you know, two people with platforms. But I
think my platform is the one where people, well, I know,
my platform is the one there are people care about
my personal life. They like to watch the mess they
like to watch that train wreck and my and because
(03:31):
I have that, it's like anybody who wants to paint
me in any sort of light can push that narrative
out to the press, and I'm the one that has
to deal with the fallout, not the baseball fans, not
the one who put it there. It's me.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
It's actually really really painful. I live in Los Angeles.
I see all the time in the entertainment world as well,
and you know there's usually one person. A lot of
times it's us that is kind of like odd man out,
pushed out, and it's it's very painful. I can speak
to that. Do you think that there's any way at
this point for you to course correct the damage now
(04:09):
that it's been done, or do you come to a
point where it's I'm just not even to try to
prove myself. I know who I am the people in
my life that know me authentically, and I'm not going
to sit here and try to like convince those people.
Otherwise it's become entertainment for them, right, It's fodder for
them because they're boring and they need to get a life. Okay, yes,
(04:30):
So where do you sit on it? Do you feel
compelled to try to clean it up? Or are you
just like, eh, whatever.
Speaker 3 (04:36):
I think it's a combination of all of that. Yes,
of course, the people who know me are going to
know who I am, who the real me is, and
they're going to support me no matter what. Or they're
going to come to me with the true story and
then that's that. Right, I'll tied up in a nice
little bow. But that doesn't mean that the Court of
public opinion has has heard that or believes that, and
that is very important for me. I'm a real turn now.
(04:57):
I have shifted my life for Jet Deory from being
a public figure to really focusing on being a midbost mom,
single mom. You've started a new career that in the
middle of life. I mean, that's a daunting thing to do.
So I'm kind of straddling this world where I'm like, Okay,
I do need to defend myself a little bit in
(05:19):
order to control the narrative, to control my reputation so
that I can continue to get sales.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Well, that's what I was going to ask you. I'm
a realtor too. Has it impacted your business or no?
Because of all the sexy real estate shows and there
are a lot of people that like having the celebrity
also as part of their representative.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
People don't want their Sotheby's agent, their high end me
Sothibe's agent to be this, you know, selling sunset girl.
Speaker 4 (05:49):
No.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
I live in country club, high end Saint Louis, Missouri.
I'm in the middle of the country. It's very Southern
traditional and it on one hand, and it's great because
we protect one another in our community. And our individuals.
On the other hand, it's a small big town, so
everybody knows everything, and word travels fast, and so if
that word is true or not true, it doesn't matter.
(06:11):
Everybody's going to know, going to hear about it. And yes,
it has effect of my business because I have had
quote unquote haters call my brokerage to try to get
me fired and tried to get me kicked off of
a real estate team I was on. And then yesterday
as an article and US Weekly came out, I had
to meet with my broker to explain the real story.
(06:32):
And you know what, gratefully and I'm so grateful my
actions have spoken louder than my words over the last year,
thank God, because my broker says she wouldn't even open
the article. She has seen her yes, and that speaks
for itself.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
So exactly empowered you and you had proven yourself to her.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
Yep, yep, yep. So that felt That feels really good.
But that takes time. That takes to build that trust
and to show people who you truly are. You can't
just tell. That takes time, and so this has been
a huge lesson in the arena of patients for me.
Because I cannot fix the way people think about me,
and other than saying something, if they're not going to
(07:12):
believe me it, I just have to show them over time.
And that is a very freaking humbling experience.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
It is because you have to. So you're living your
life authentically and true to who you are right at
the same time, still obviously posting on social media to
create that and continue that and get clients and show
them that you know how to handle their biggest investments, right,
which is a big deal, and being discreet because we
know everybody's finances. So it's like kind of a big jumble.
(07:42):
And it's almost like, do you, as you're continuing to
curate a bunch of different avenues in your life, do
you feel that you worry that certain things can come
back to bite you that maybe you didn't think about
as much?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Then Oh, my gosh, absolutely, yeah, yes, yes, yes, I
think this is a very like time honored story. Right.
Everybody kind of has their story, especially if you've been
in the public eye. And my days in the public
eye started when I was thirty years old. I'm now
forty almost forty one, and so yeah, I did stupid
stuff when I was thirty that I wouldn't have done today,
or maybe or I should say, in the throes of
(08:19):
a contentious divorce that was well unfolding in the public eye.
At the same time, I found out that my baby
had cerebral palsy and COVID hit. So yeah, I'm gonna
I think that it's suffice to say that one would
probably make some decisions that they might not during a
time like that.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Do you feel like people give you grace on that
or no?
Speaker 3 (08:41):
I don't know. I think I was in such a
tornado at the time I couldn't see my way out
of it. Now, looking back, I think that people meaning that,
like the fans who don't are people who don't know me.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
No, there was no grace. She's crazy.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
She's like, oh look at her spiraling, she's so pathetic
or sad or drama she married him for the money,
or she got this coming, whatever it is they want
to say. But now I think it's it's like they
can watch me and I either continue down whatever path
that was, which was using the media to really try
to vilify my ex husband at the time because I
(09:17):
didn't know which way was up, and I regret doing that.
I think it was messy and tacky, and I'm upset
that I made those choices because now my children are
going to see that one day, or they could if
they want to search it. I will be honest with them.
I knew at the time that they would see it
one day, but I thought, you know, this is true,
This is all true, and I'm gonna be able to
(09:39):
have a strong relationship with my kids where I can
explain that to them. Now, even with that clarity, I
still regret it. But all I can do is change
my approach going forward. But it doesn't really matter if
all of it's in the past, it still comes back
to haunt me. And that's just you know, the bed
that I made, and no I'm laying in it.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
But here's the good news. As somebody who's been divorced
longer than you and who's older than you is you're human.
Lots of people go through very messy divorces that people
love to tune into it, and I hear it all
the time. So and so it is with the pickleball coach,
this personette, whatever, they move on to their own step.
At the end of the day, they're focused on themselves
(10:17):
and other stories that's right. Come up, and you're right
because you will have the relationship with your children. And
you say, guys, it's painful getting divorced, and I hope
that never happens to you. And we're all doing the
best we can. But I love you with my entire heart,
and I'm here and they'll be fine. Kids are resilient, period, right.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
And I just want to be authentic for them and
say when I screw up, but yes, And I think
we all kind of embrace those short sales or short
news cycles and hope that you know, everything blows over
and always does. It just takes a couple of days.
But when stuff hits mainstream media like US Weekly, and
it just it gets out of the blogs into the mainstream,
that's when it starts to bother me. Because you're not
(10:54):
just dealing with the people in their basements with their
hand on their pants.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
Typing on Reddit all day long.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
These are professionals who are going to browse through headlines
and they're going to see that US Weekly headlines. So
that's when it really kind of starts to hit a
little closer to home.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
I totally understand. Do you have people close to you
that you feel support you that have gone through similar situations,
Like if somebody else has walked your path, it feels
like a safer kind of space that you feel supportive
worre you know, instead of somebody who doesn't get it
and you're like, you just don't get it, Like, do
you feel like you've seen other people in these very
similar toxic kind of situations.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
I mean, I think my own personal situation is so
highly unique because of my exposure on the Housewives, being
married to a professional athlete, and then the other you know,
minutia that comes with the rest of my story. But
I think that fame, and that's kind of the platform
that I'm speaking to right now. I think that fame, money,
(11:51):
influence good looks. I think that there's currency to all
of those things as well. And so because of that
and the perception of you know that, like fame is
this elite person or money makes someone elite or whatever
it is, how we perceive, you know, this currency that
someone has a lot of. It's like we want to
(12:13):
watch what it looks like to take them down. And so, yeah,
I might not have the the like direct comparison to me,
but I do have friends who have you know, a
lot of money that people are trying to get to
or take them down or create rumors about them or
friends who you know are in politics or whatever. And
(12:35):
so I think that we need to think about this issue,
not even just you know, being a celebrity, but it's
like sticking it to the proverbial man. And I represent
as a celebrity some sort of proverbial man that people
like to see fall on their on their knees, and
because it kind of helps our simpletons feel better about themselves.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
But it's like the person who's driving and the you know,
there's a car accident, everybody slows down to look. I mean,
it's like it's sad that people want. People are envious,
people are unhappy inherently right now, right, and people want
to see beautiful, rich, successful people that were at the
top of their game fall right, and also kind of
normalizes their own experiences too. So yeah, it's it's like
(13:20):
super super painful.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
I also think, Louise, that this is kind of like
the modern day version of gladiators, like back in the
Roman times, where it's just all these spectators gather around
to watch a blood bath. It's not about what's fair
or how they got there in the first place. It's
not even that they even you don't even know if
they want to be there. Like I think there are
(13:42):
mostly like bad guys that were just like plucked out
for people's entertainment. But I'm one of those gladiators right now.
I'm just in a different arena and I never asked
to be that gladiator. Somebody pulled me in there, and
now I'm a spectacle and it does not matter how
I get out of it, because it's not the truth
that matters. It's the narrative that matters, and that's what
(14:03):
the court of opinion will decide.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
And you have to You're going to continue to negate
that narrative by people like your broker who supported you
and didn't you know, read the article and subscribe to it.
You're gonna do great work with your clients, and you're
gonna build your people around you that you can trust,
that know you, and.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
Then yeah, that's all you can do. I mean, it's
difficult to not get angry in the in the meantime,
you know, when you're building up that trust, like once again,
back to the virtue of patients. It's been a huge challenge,
but that's all that it is. And I told my
kids that, you know, because as my children, my four
sweet children, are products of this very contentious divorce between
(14:39):
their parents. Sometimes they'll hear different things from different sides,
and they'll say, well, somebody, you know, basically somebody's line.
And I'll say to my children, listen, I'm telling you
the truth, but there is no way that you can
know that unless until time happens. So you're gonna so
I'm gonna help you with this, and I'm gonna say,
all right, this is what I said.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Now let's wait till it happens. Blah blah, you know.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
And so I'm trying to teach them like that trust
is built up over time, which is a sad lesson
for seven and eight year.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Old kids because they should always trust their parents.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Do they go back and forth even lead to both houses?
Speaker 2 (15:13):
No, it's not no, it's not even no, it's.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Not even okay, God, Yeah, well, I guess let's talk
about what happens when you're in a contentious divorce and
then there's new partners, because that brings a whole other
kind of animal to it.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
I never knew what it would be, what it was
like without a new partner, because I think it was
like I think we'd been maybe split up, like two months,
maybe less.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
I think it might have been less.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
It was okay, we split up the end of October
twenty nineteen, and before twenty twenty hit he was living
with his current.
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Well it's over it's overlap.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Yeah, it's overlap.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
It's overlap, which makes it really hard then for the
ex wife and the new woman to be on this
same page.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
Right, I don't have a relationship with with his new wife,
so that I don't know. I mean, I think it
would be better for the kids if we did, but
it's it could be worse. I suppose it.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Well, the problem is that the kids are still young, right,
So if there was the ability where everybody could be
some sort of you know, modern family that can you know,
do holidays together and trips and you know, sit at
parent teacher conference is great.
Speaker 3 (16:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Do you feel that you don't have to answer this
like who's the puppeteer in that relationship? Like who's who's
perpetuating the drama that exists now between like you and
her that's making it this way.
Speaker 3 (16:37):
I don't think there is drama between us I don't
talk to her. I don't like, I don't know, Like,
I don't think there is any there's nothing there, there's
no relationship. It's like it's basically like I see a
picture and she's a ghost, you know, it's to me
kind of idea. I like. I like the role that
she plays because she provides consistency for my children. She
(16:59):
sounds like she's calm for the most part as far
as like what my children say to me, and they
like her, So I don't have any problem with her,
Like any issues that she would have with me are
secondary information. They're not you know, she hasn't derived her
opinions about me directly from my relation our relationship. They're
(17:22):
all third party opinions that she's taking a talk yeah yeah,
pillow talk. So I don't but I don't know her
and I don't try to know her. It's she's whatever
to me, except that my kids like her, so that's fine,
and she's not good.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
So what I what I appreciate from you, Megan, is
you actually seem super neutral on it, right, which is
really the best kind of place to be. So maybe
do you think that there could be a world or
what would it take for the situation between the two
of you to be more comfortable.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
I guess between my ex and myself and.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Like any even that, like after a contentious divorce, like
is it time is like what is it? What do
you think can eventually bring people back to you know,
kind of a calm place where you just say, like,
you're a dad, I'm the mom. These are Look, here's
the thing with divorce people. You can get remarried. He
can be remarried. Those three kids belong to the two
of you.
Speaker 4 (18:19):
Yeah, okay, do you think you seem like a girl's
girl to me in the conversation of talking to Right,
So it's important for women to support women, period, Okay, Right, So.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
It seems that a lot of times this is not
the case. I've personally experienced this with people with my
own friends, and it's like a heartbreak. Yes, why do
you think it's important for women to support women? Would
that create.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I think that I think that, like basically, our culture
has groomed us to think that the way that women
communicate is negative or caddy or bad because women are
emotional and they talk about what's going on more small
talk than you know, broad talk like men would stereotypically
(19:22):
be classified as I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
I think that water cooler conversation is some of the
most important conversations in order to keep our communities safe
and and like families, you know, up to date and knowledgeable.
So having said that, fast forward, you know, past your
water cooler days, and here we are today and we
(19:44):
are trying we try to say, like, you know, gossip
is bad, let's reframe that. Like if we can reframe
gossip as being good, as being women helping one another,
then we could be so much more powerful as a sex.
And I think that you know, we're as women, we
are more emotional, but we're all so much more peaceful.
And I think we just want to love everyone more,
(20:07):
so we feel more attached to any sort of you know,
emotionally charged situation. So it can divide us in a
lot of ways, but generally speaking, I think we're all
talking about the same thing, and we're all the generally
the underdog in the situation. Don't even get me started
on family court with.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
That, you know, what's a good idea? Actually, just like
there's life coaches, or there should be a divorce coach.
Speaker 3 (20:33):
I think there are Oh well.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
It's like there's rush, you know, somebody's going through rush.
Like a divorce coach should almost be in contentious situations,
should be mandated by the courts or the lawyers or something.
I mean they have that our family wizard. Yeah, in
terms of are you guys using that for that?
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Oh gosh, oh just got two messages on it, Louise.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
Paper trail is so important.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Yeah, well it doesn't seem like anybody cares though, well
they don't.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
I mean, it's so true, but a divorce coach would
be so good in terms of kind of navigating and.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
And what to say. I think language is so important.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
Like there's certain like like trigger words that I think
the courts hate hearing, which are alienation narcissists. You know,
they hate those words. But if you can describe the behaviors,
that's okay.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
Yeah, no, it's it's it's true. Do you find that
it sounds like in your situation because it's content or
maybe not whatever? Are you are your two household? It
doesn't sound like you guys are on the same parenting page, right,
So there's a lot of kind of re entry, right,
so they come your house, there's like major unwinding of
(21:49):
kind of an unpacking of that and that house, and
then you've got to read bulls to them, to you
and yours and probably right or true, and then they
go back and it's this like repeat thing of Groundhog's Day,
which is so hard to do. It's hard for these kids.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
I mean, I mean, well, you have to understand, I
was a stepmom before I was a biological mother, and
so I saw this this you know, game being played
by this this dance, if you will, between the houses.
I had that with my step kids, and those two
households were much more on the same page than mine is.
(22:27):
But I wouldn't go to great lengths to say that
it was on the same page. But I just think
that's like, I think it's easy to say, Okay, if
we were on the same page, there would be easy
re entry. But I don't agree with that. I think
the re entry is going to be tough no matter
the situation. Children thrive on routine, and switching houses is
not routine. This is not how it was meant to
(22:48):
be done. And so pointing fingers at are ex's is
so easy to do, but really just sucks.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Divorce sucks, and the people who get hurt are the kids? Yep?
Are you a product divorce?
Speaker 3 (23:00):
No, My parents have been married fifty years in May.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Did you grow up in the Midwest?
Speaker 3 (23:06):
Yep. Born and raised Saint Louis, Missouri, oldest of four kids,
Irish Catholic. My parents are so in love, my dad writes,
my mom loves notes that I'll find. My mom was
over at my house last night, just hanging out with
me and my kids, and my dad just drove by
and popped out, kicked the soccer ball with the kids.
I'm talking Americana right here. I grew up in a
really great way. I couldn't have written the script better myself,
(23:28):
and kind of think it hit me up, honestly because
I thought that that's what I was going to get,
and the boy was I in for surprise.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Well, you know, it's interesting because I'm a product of
a tough divorce and I made bad choices, my sister,
I mean, just whatever relationship choices.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
Yeah, of course. And you know I can kind of
under I know what my baggage is right now after
this many years of doing it, like I understand where
it comes from. Super hard to unwind it at.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
Fifty totally.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
More clarity though, Yes, but we have default behaviors. It's
very hard I see, yes, right. But it's funny because
a very few people where I live in Los Angeles,
most people are divorced, and I can count on one
hand of my big group of friends two couples that
I think are genuinely happy, okay, And it's interesting to
(24:25):
really kind of take stock of whose parents are still
married and in love and the environment that they grew
up in. And I would say most of the happily
married people are the ones that grew up in that
environment because that example was healthy and so it continued.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
It didn't occur to me that there's bad people in
the world because the only thing that occurred to me
was that people show up authentically in relationship, especially you know,
a partnership. And when that didn't happen, that was just
mind boggling for me. But I thought I had this
great family that could fix him.
Speaker 1 (25:01):
You know.
Speaker 3 (25:02):
I saw that his childhood was more challenging than mine.
My heart goes out to anyone with those any challenges
in childhood. It's not your fault. And I would never.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Blame him for the way he was raised. Or how
that painted him.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
But he's a grown up now, and so if he's
not able to overcome, like you said, even those patterns
are hard to overcome. But you're a grown up now
and it's up to you, you know, to decide if
you're going to let that shape you or not. Now,
I thought that all he needed was, oh, here's a
stable family, and here's good people, and here's Sunday dinners.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
No, that's that's nice.
Speaker 1 (25:40):
That's his childhood wounds in all of his baggage set.
But you know, to your point, like such, when people
choose to have children and there's eyes on us at
all times, like we don't want to continue to perpetuate
the cycle. Right, So it's almost like, okay, so maybe
he didn't get off scott free, or you didn't get
it off scott free, or I didn't, but like you know,
(26:00):
the onus is on us to try to do it differently,
for them to see it differently, right, So you know,
hopefully he'll get there to do that with you.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
I mean, I think I'm on my own journey as well.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
You know, this is not what I thought my life
would look like as a mother and at all, and
this is not the type of mother I thought I
would be. I think I thought I would be a
lot better mom. I have a lot of stress taking
up my time and energy, like lawsuit with my ex
being a major one, and I can't like, once again,
(26:34):
I can't just point the finger at my ex saying
like you drew me in a lawsuit or whatever. I'm
still there, you know, like I'm still in it as well,
and I have to be able to prioritize my values
in order to give my kids the best chance. And
hopefully I'm not totally poking them up.
Speaker 1 (26:54):
Well, I don't think you are, because I think what
they're seeing is a real vulnerability. You know, they'll listen
to this, They'll they know who you are. They can
look in your eyes. You have kind eyes. They're also
around your parents, and they're around that unit, so as
much as maybe they're feeling that kind of family love,
devotion and all of that. So I do think that
it takes a village, and I think you have a village.
(27:16):
You're not alone on that No, it might be on
purely on one side of the fence, because you're not
there in conjunction with your ex husband, but you have
a lot of people they are loving and supporting to
lead by example.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
And I think that's huge and that is a system
that I put in place that I'm proud of myself
that I did for my children because I think there's
you know, a lot of different factors that go into
created in person and who they turn out to be.
And you hear these miraculous stories of these kids with
horrible childhoods who turn out to do great things in life,
and they're quote unquote miraculous stories, but I disagree. I
(27:50):
don't think they're miraculous because the common denominator and all
of those success stories are these children were surrounded by
community with good positive examples. And so when these kids
didn't have you know, their buckets filled at home, they
could find it within the community that they were surrounded by.
And I have at least been able to provide that
for my children. So if I took up in all
(28:12):
the ways, and their dad's up in all the ways,
hopefully their community can carry them through. So at least
I got that right.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
And you know, don't, Megan, don't underestimate what you're showing
them by getting a career working being a strong woman,
like I will tell you. My kids have watched it
and as they went to college, they really commented on that.
So you're setting an incredible example to your child.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
Yeah, I think I am. I hear them talk about it.
They're very proud of me. They like to talk about
how I'm a realtor and I've taken them to houses
and they like to talk about how they went to
work with mommy, and they are proud. It's really cool
to see. And it's not just the work, but I
think it's just something that they like to see that
their mom is doing things that that like are outside
(29:01):
just the norm of.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
You're doing something for yourself and you're making a difference.
And I think it's a really good example. But just
wait till you start taking them to listings of yours
that are not within your reach to buy. That happened
my kids like why do we live here? I'm like,
not in mom's wheelhouse. Sorry. Home is the people, not
the structure.
Speaker 3 (29:20):
My eggs had, you know, this massive, massive, massive, twenty
thousand square foot home and I don't. And so my
kids would used to say to me, well, why don't
we have a bowling now in the basement? Mom? But
when down there why don't we have many golfer a
slide or in a pool, And and so I'm used
to that, which is my kids are used to that.
But you know what, my daughter and my kids, they
(29:42):
feel the energy. And one of my favorite stories, my
daughter's friend's parents just got separated and the mom moved
from a nice house to a little, you know, two
bedroom house, and my daughter, Aspen was picked up from
her dad's house or is twenty thousand square foot brand new,
we're just mansion, and to go to this girl's house.
(30:03):
And she said this. Mom told me that my daughter
Aspen walks in and goes into this little girl's room
and says, oh my gosh, this is the coolest room
I've ever seen. I wish my room looked like this,
and she meant it.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
It's she truly did.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
And the mom told me that she started to cry
so like it's that means the world to me. That
tells me right there that I'm doing something.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Okay, I always lived in a smaller house and place
than my ex husband did, and I didn't quite have
the access and the perks and the trips and the
I mean I really and it was hard for me
at times like I kind of felt less than.
Speaker 3 (30:39):
And I get it.
Speaker 1 (30:40):
I said to my kids one day and I said, look,
and I've always taught them this, and I actually hear
them repeating it, so I know they're absorbing it. So
this is a good one for you to remember. Okay, right,
OM is the people. It's not the structure that's cute.
That's great, and they have learned it, and I, over
the years have felt badly when I can't, you know,
(31:02):
take them to Japan and get them, you know, floor ceasier,
and I feel kind of like I suck, I'm a loser.
And they have said to me, Mom, we love you
for you and we're proud of you. And it doesn't
that it does. And I really believe it, I really
really and my kids are in their twenties.
Speaker 3 (31:20):
They do believe it because it's true. And I can't
do those things for my kids either, but I'm proud
of what I can do. I couldn't take my daughter
to Portugal to Lisbon to go see Taylor Swift this
year with VIPs, but you know what I could do.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
I took her to the.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
Outskirts of Saint Louis and I took her to a
Taylor Swift cover band during the Era's tour, you know,
and she had a blast. And it's like it's it's
just I think so much about the effort and curating
an experience and the time together that.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
I think it's the time. I think it's the time.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
So much more important than anything else, you know. And
I can't afford vacation, crazy elaborate vacations. But I can't
afford to spend money on myself. Was credit card and
get some points and buy tickets for my kids. You know,
I am.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Scrapped, Darlin, I'm kidding, are you?
Speaker 3 (32:11):
I'm both? Actually? Yeah, I do whatever I can and
I get and I get creative with it and scrappy
with it. And I'm proud of myself and I hope
I know my kids see the work that I put
into it.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
So here's another really good thing. And it's something I
started to do. And again, your kids sound old enough
to start doing it. A couple of things. First of all,
I would sit at the dinner table and we I
don't think. I don't know if your kids have phones yet.
Usually kids would divorce do because.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
They have like iPads. But I don't have phone numbers
for them.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Okay, So you sit at the table without devices. Okay,
I got it, and you will be shocked at how
observant and smart kids are at different ages and start
asking open ended questions things like this. If you were
to describe mom and dad separately in three words good
(33:08):
or bad to people who don't know them, what would
you say?
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Oh, that's cute.
Speaker 1 (33:13):
You will be shocked by the answer because they get it. Okay,
and never one What is your happiest memory to date?
I mean, there's so many questions, and I can send
you where I got most of them. But there's an
app you can download called Wholesome holsom and it has
all types of categories of open ended questions, whether it's
(33:36):
for kids of this age, or relationships or humor. And
it makes the conversation at the dinner table more connected,
more textured, and more memorable. And it's going to bring you, guys,
really closer, and I get it's going to show your depth,
and it's going to show you it's going to allow
you to show them who you are because you're going
to answer the same questions. And it's also going to
(33:58):
allow them to feel comfort to have real conversations with you,
and then you're going to eliminate the surface, like how
was school today good? Did you write your friends or Dick?
Speaker 3 (34:07):
I forgot?
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Yeah, like it just makes for a really great, really
good And then the other thing I always did too,
which was important, was to sounds stupid, but you know
everywhere we went, whether it was at night after I
made them. My kids were third and fifth grade, they
were young like yours, and I had each kid pick
a TV show that they were going to watch with me,
(34:30):
and then when they went to dad's house they couldn't
watch it, and then they would come back and it
would be our time together the show. And then the
other thing is Rummy Cube. I don't know if you
play a game with the kids. We do, okay, So
Rubny Cube was like it was easy, it was you know,
you could take it on trips, you could play it
at home, and it was just time spent together to
(34:50):
build the foundation. Because when they get older, they kind
of go out and they're living their lives, which is
what you want. You want them to launch.
Speaker 3 (34:59):
We do. I feel like we do the game Sorry
Uno and Monopoly on repeat. We constantly have a family
puzzle out, so everybody has the role, you know, and
we all sit there whenever, you know, to do the
family puzzle and our but our favorite thing to do
together as a family is hop on our golf cart
(35:22):
and every Sunday we take the cardboard to the recycling center,
which is in our little downtown. Yeah. So like we do.
I really try to do like the absolute most that
I can for my children, and I love it and
they have we have these traditions together that they'll always remember,
you know.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
But that's my point. It doesn't matter we ride our.
Speaker 3 (35:44):
Bikes into the farmer's market and they you know, stuff
like that.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
It's the time spent and the activity and the memory.
It's not the you know, whipping on a private plane.
Speaker 3 (35:53):
And no whatever, which is cool too, by the way,
which is really cool too.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
They're not gonna get from mama.
Speaker 1 (35:59):
No, no, no, no, honestly, what's more important is the small
things and finding joy and appreciation and value in the
small things period. And you're doing that, and you're also
showing them community service too, which is giving back.
Speaker 3 (36:14):
Yeah, that's true, it is, and being an active member
of the community. We go to the local performing arts center,
we're involved in the community center. I do all the things.
I'm such a Midwest mom and like, this is how
I was raised and I'm doing the same thing for
my kids. But I think my first, So my first,
I'm forty one, almost forty one. I'll at least live
(36:35):
to be eighty. So I have you, know less.
Speaker 1 (36:37):
Than half fill twenty five?
Speaker 3 (36:39):
Okay, okay, so holy seventy five more years? Then?
Speaker 1 (36:42):
All right, so I have you for a few more minutes.
I'm just gonna ask a couple more things.
Speaker 5 (36:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, So house wives fans, Well, first of all,
is there anything else now that you have this floor
in this platform that you want to say to address
any of the stuff that's kind of recently been out there,
you know, kind of this is your time to just
(37:06):
hit it home one more time, or do you feel
like you've got out what you wanted to say?
Speaker 3 (37:12):
What I want to say is just super high level
and it's not in the weeds with me specifically. I'm
so over being in the press and the drama that
relates to me specifically. I think that I'm here for
like to try to give voice to a bigger message
here that celebrity is more accessible than ever with the advent,
and like proliferation of reality television, and so it's easy,
(37:36):
it's easier than ever to consume media and to also
use media to villainize others. And I think that it's
just important to be mindful as we scroll through our
phones that of the repercussions that can be held on
these individuals.
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Okay, so Housewive fans have been wanting you to come
back to the OC franchise.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
They have recently.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
Your former cast member Vicky, who isn't even on the
show anymore, said no when a fan suggested that you
come back, Soper off, How does that comment make you feel?
And I don't know, do you see you don't live
there anymore? But would you ever go back if they offered?
Or are you pretty set being back with your family
(38:24):
doing real estate, being around the Midwest values none of
that kind of you know, flashy glamorama type stuff and
like hunkering down. Is it a different stage of your
life or does that calling still kind.
Speaker 2 (38:36):
Of I'm into all of that.
Speaker 3 (38:39):
It's just like on a more adult level, if you will,
I not missed thirty year old level. I told Alex Baskin,
he's one of the executive producers that I'm open.
Speaker 2 (38:52):
I would be interested in being a friend.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
I told, oh, and I'm friends with I'm friends with
Tracy Tudor, I'm friends with She's she's a real estate
agent on TV Million Dollars Listening, and then so and
I'm friends with Jeff Lewis, who's also in real estate.
So I think it would be fun to do real
estate in California, but I don't have my license. I
mean it's a pipe dream, you know. It's kind of
(39:16):
like playing in house in my head.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
But yeah, i'd go back.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
You would do a real estate show, but maybe not
a housewive back to that whole.
Speaker 3 (39:22):
I don't know if I want to be like on
for my life as much, but I would like to
be a friend that they don't really like dig into
your life as a friend.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
I got it Vicky Is.
Speaker 3 (39:34):
I thought it was funny that she even responded to that,
because like, Vicky doesn't give a fuck about me. I
can promise you that I don't know about her, and
so it's funny that like it's still this beef is
still out there. I think it's kind of cute.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
It's cute, and I think it's also people's way of
still kind of being like relevant.
Speaker 3 (39:51):
In the mix. Yeah, right, we look, we're talking about it.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
We're talking about it. So yeah, it's kind of like
I would teach my kids, like even if somebody's talking,
they're talking about you, it means you matter. It's true, right,
if people aren't talking about you, then like you're irrelevant. Well, Megan,
thank you so much for the honest thanks. I know
many of us you have gone through divorce. They're going
(40:17):
through divorce. Many of my friends are family members, very relatable,
and each time I tell my kids people we know
are getting divorced, they look at me like this, doesn't
everyone get divorced. So I've got a lot to unwind there.
So maybe I'm gonna ship them to the Midwest and
they'd have a better opportunity. Anyways, if you're going through
a difficult divorce and feel like you aren't moving in
(40:39):
a positive direction or you need some help, call us
or email us all the infos in the show notes,
follow us on socials, and make sure to rate and
review the podcast. I do Part two an iHeartRadio podcast
where falling in love is the main objective. And let's
hope your chapter two and my chapter two are like
(41:00):
better and they're.
Speaker 3 (41:01):
Moving on right into the sunset.
Speaker 1 (41:03):
Gotcha all right, Take care, Thanks BYEEE
Hosts And Creators
Ben Higgins
Ashley Iaconetti
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