December 21, 2025 • 35 mins
Join Jennie and some of her favorite voices from 2025 as they share their most helpful, honest tips for navigating the holiday season with grace and humor. From Candace Cameron Bure and Gabrielle Carteris to Jason Priestley, Yvette Nicole Brown and more, each offers permission to let go of perfection and trust yourself… one moment at a time.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Garl. Hello
and Happy holidays, Happy Holidays, Welcome to I Choose Me.
This podcast is all about making choices, choices that help
create peace and wholeness for you and the people you love.
(00:24):
Doesn't that sound good? This year, I have had the
honor of sitting down with some really incredible guests. I've
been so lucky to have shared some really powerful stories
but also some powerful ways to choose yourself during the holidays,
which can be the hardest time to take care of
(00:44):
our own needs. Let's be honest before we hear from
my fab friends Gabrielle Carteris Evett, Nicole Brown, Candace Cameron
Beret and others. Let me share my very favorite and
very easy I Choose Me moment for this season and
something I'm gonna do. Choose a holiday tradition because you
(01:06):
love it, not because they love it. It could be
watching your favorite holiday movie because you want to watch it.
Don't let them pick the movie. It could be a
recipe that brings back those childhood memories, or maybe you
know something that's going on in your neighborhood. Pick a
(01:26):
local Christmas eve service you know with beautiful music just
make you feel so good. So pick one ritual that
fills you up and make it non negotiable. Because when
you anchor yourself in something that brings you real comfort,
it naturally softens everything else around you. So cheers to
(01:51):
choosing yourself this holiday. Here are some tips from my
friends to have a happy and stress free holiday season.
Candice Cameron Burray, what is the one way that you
find to choose yourself during the holidays to enjoy the
holiday amidst all of the chaos of the season.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
That's fun day.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
It's it's hard because Christmas is, especially when you've raised kids,
it's a lot of work. It's a ton of work,
and you're tired.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
I think, I know, I can I answer this into
you choose which answer you want.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
I love decorating my Christmas tree and I usually do
it on myself because no one wants to help me,
to be honest, but.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
And so I put a Christmas movie on, which is
usually White Christmas or like Miracle on thirty four Streets,
something old, and I just love it, but usually White
Christmas because I love the dancing in it, and I
just I just decorate like by myself, no when no
one else is around, and I like, I love it.
(03:03):
This makes me really happy during the holidays. The other
thing I like in that during Christmas time is I
need everyone to get dressed up. One night. I need
to put on like the Christmas outfit, and nobody ever
wants to do that.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
But I don't know why.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Everyone wants to stay cozy and pjs. But I like
to get like one night of a holiday Christmas y dressed,
fancy cocktail night kind of thing. And I don't know.
I feel like I force everyone to go to something
during the holidays that they don't want to. So mama
wants to get dressed up.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Oh, I think that's great, Jen hat Maker, give me
one tip, one way we can choose ourselves during the
holiday season.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
Oh my god, do not be afraid to say no.
Do not be afraid. You will not ruin everybody's Christmas.
You will not ruin your Christmas. You will not ruin
Christmas itself. If something comes up and it feels like
too much, too long, too far, too hard, too busy,
(04:18):
you with no equivocation, can say thank you so much
for inviting me. I cannot I won't be able to
make that, or I will not be able to put
up a second Christmas tree this year, or I will
not be able to be in that gift exchange, or
I can't come to that party. Thank you, So do
not be afraid to say no. Everybody is inviting everybody
(04:39):
to everything everywhere. So I spent a lot of Christmas
is trying to please everybody who wanted me to be anywhere,
and it was disastrous. So this is your season. You
chart your path, You build out your own rhythms in
a way that feels like delightful to you.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
Perfect Theresa Kabudo, I'm just gonna ask you, how do
you choose yourself during the craziness of Christmas.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Oh, I think it's easier now because my kids are old,
so it's it's easier. But I always put a present
under the tree from Santa to Teresa.
Speaker 6 (05:20):
You are a smart Oh.
Speaker 5 (05:21):
Yeah, I love I love gifts. I love shopping. I
just I just I just love things.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Well, speaking of shopping, be sure to check out your
beautiful jewelry line Divinely Guided, Finely Guided.
Speaker 7 (05:37):
Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
It's so special.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
I mean I really just wanted to create something because
Heaven and Earth really do meat at the smallest moments,
and I want everyone to find that. And that's why,
like even the pieces of wearing tete like this this
cross that we just it's a for our QBC to
kind of give people, no matter what faith they are,
to give them that kind of little their little faith back.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
Just a little reminder.
Speaker 5 (06:01):
This is the let the light impendent.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Okay, you I got that one. That's the one you
sent me. That's the light dependent.
Speaker 5 (06:08):
Yeah, because in our darkest times we have to remember
to let the light in. And this is when the
light hits this. You can see it like it reflects it,
but it also comes in and it's surrounded by on
the top it says grounding strength and power to remind
ourselves to ground us and that we have the strength
and power to let the light in even in our
(06:31):
darkest moment.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Oh my gosh, I gotta go put it on.
Speaker 5 (06:35):
See and then I'm also wearing what my rosary beats.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
Oh my gosh, that's so good. How does Evette Nicole
Brown get through the chaos of the holidays woo.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
By not partaking in any of it?
Speaker 8 (06:52):
I answer, I've heard telling you. I don't. I don't
trick or treat. I don't dress up for halle Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
I usually get me a.
Speaker 8 (07:00):
Little smoked turkey breast from a honey baked ham, like
two weeks before Thanksgiving and make my little meal. And
by the time everybody else eating Thanksgiving, I've already had
my turkey and sweet potatoes over and over again. And
then when it comes to Christmas, you know, I don't
do the family card, I don't do the year letter.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
I feel repulsed by both of those things.
Speaker 3 (07:25):
Yeah, I just think like I can't. I don't have it.
Speaker 8 (07:27):
I don't remember what happened yesterday. Let alone tell you
what happened in January and walk you through it.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
And I may have a Christmas tree that's been up
for two years.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Oh it's just ready.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
So that song.
Speaker 8 (07:40):
We need a little Christmas right this very minute, going
to the family room. There's some Christmas body.
Speaker 3 (07:43):
So I honestly do not. I don't deal with any
of it. I don't do any of it.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
Well, Merry Christmas, happening, all the things forever, we don't
ever have to talk about it again.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Yeah, I don't do it.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Hard enough, I don't want it, says take it easy
on yourselves people.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
That's what I'm trying to tell people. Y'all better relax.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
How about you enjoy the day?
Speaker 9 (08:04):
How about.
Speaker 10 (08:06):
All right?
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Thank you so much for spending time with me. I
really love seeing you.
Speaker 3 (08:10):
Yes, thank you, Brooke Broke.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
What is the one way that you find to separate
yourself from the chaos that is the holiday season?
Speaker 9 (08:22):
So hard? Holidays have always been madness around my house.
I bett they're organizing the clean up. I love the
family time.
Speaker 11 (08:33):
It's hard.
Speaker 9 (08:34):
I feel like my children are older now, so it's
a little bit less is more. You remember the days
of trying to do all these We still do stockings,
by the way, even for my older kids. It's fun
thing in our house. But letting them really, I guess,
get involved and make some wishes and get the more
significant thing instead of a bunch. But I don't compromise
(08:55):
my wellness around the holidays. I find that yoga is
my reset, my therapy, it's my medicine. It's calming for me. Lately,
I'm trying to do one class in the evening because
it helps me really wind down and drop into a
greater sleep state. But I'm walking a lot trying to
take some digestion walks because there's more food, there's more flavors,
(09:18):
there's more decades we're drinking, like whatever your jam is.
There's just a lot more going on. And I maybe
add in a class. It schedule allows during the holidays.
One of the reasons why I like the app world
or the digital world, whether it's with me or somebody else,
even on YouTube, get free content. I don't have to
drive anywhere or go anywhere. I can kind of say
thirty forty minutes and it helps me reset so much
(09:42):
of what I do in fitnesses for my head, my energy,
and my strap and I'm in a much better mood after.
Speaker 11 (09:48):
That work out.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
That's good for the holidays. Everybody wants mama to be
happy during the holidays and not straight.
Speaker 9 (09:56):
It's fun. Maybe you'll join us. We do it a
live stream a turkey burn, a like post turkey sodio
burn Thanksgiving. So it's really I just do it from
your own home. But I think fitness has to be fun,
and it's fun during the holidays to do it with family, friends,
love and just.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Take a walk.
Speaker 9 (10:14):
Yeah yeah, just take a walk, move your body.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Family walks on my list, got it. Gabrielle Carterris. The
holiday season is here.
Speaker 4 (10:25):
It is upon us.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
What do you do to choose yourself during the holidays
to keep saying and to truly enjoy them?
Speaker 6 (10:31):
The holidays are not as hard for me to get
through with peace. So what I say for me enjoy
whatever to get through peace. Make sure to give time
to yourself. I find I am committed to it at
least an hour a day, that's just myself.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
What do you do?
Speaker 6 (10:48):
I get up very early. I get five o'clock. Yeah,
today was four thirty, but at five o'clock I have
thirty I try not to go on my phone. Right
sometimes I do, I go, but I go away from it.
I have a cup of tea. Sometimes I stand outside
just to smell the air because I think that's to
(11:10):
remember where I'm at. And then like today, I woke
up at six thirty, but when the sun came up
to quarter seven, because I won't walk outside by myself
other than I went to start on a three mile
walk and I just smell the air and I literally
just live in gratitude in that moment. That's what I
try to do. And so this holiday will be the
(11:32):
same thing for me, I'll take that time because I
will hope to carry with my to my family. But
for me, because I I'm in a good place with
my family. We're not all there and I know that,
but I would say, family or loved ones, take the
time to see them, don't rush through that moment. Maybe
even let them know what they do for you in
(11:53):
your life.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
And just.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
For me, I will be living in gratitude. I feel
very blessed, and I will shower them all with the
love that I have. And I love this time of year.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
You're a big entertainer. You must be excited.
Speaker 6 (12:09):
It's gonna be great. I'll have tons of parties on
everybody for dinner. I just love it. I love cooking
for everybody. I don't even have to talk. I can
just like listen to them talk. It makes me very happy.
It's my my happy place. You're such a giver, very lucky.
What will you be doing. I get up.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
Earlier now so I have that buff buffer, so that
I know I have time to not look at my phone.
Nobody's awake yet, I don't have to deal with anything.
Speaker 6 (12:38):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
It's quiet, it's quiet. I usually do a little. I
learned this from Brook Burk. Do a little red mask
therapy while I'm meditating in the morning, while I'm thinking
of the things I'm grateful for.
Speaker 6 (12:48):
Great.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Then from there great kind of hit the ground running.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
And the busier you get, the more you have to
take time for yourself. Yes, that's great, Jen, because you
know what, I really believe this, If you take some
time to yourself, more time for Jayley and the holidays,
when you're feeling and you're up against the wall, you'll
get more done.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
You get more done, You're just more present. And isn't
that what the holidays are supposed to be about.
Speaker 6 (13:10):
It's because all this is make believe. But even that
you're doing this stuff, it's all great. Yeah, your family
and your friends in your life, that's the real truth.
I'd pray that's what I'm going to think about you.
But you have that This holiday thank you.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Isn't Gabrielle the best. My guests shared some beautiful I
Choose Me moments for the holidays. But the truth is
these reminders aren't just seasonal. They're kind of like tools
that help us find peace and wholeness all year long.
So congratulations for taking this. I choose me moment to
be with me right now. Here are some more from
(13:51):
this year's conversations with my amazing and wise friends Jason Priestley.
What was your last I Choose me moment?
Speaker 12 (14:01):
You know what, I choose me almost every day when
I go to pilates because it is a totally selfish endeavor.
And whether I'm going there or I'm just going to
the gym. You know, I work out six days a week.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
But that's not selfish.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
I got to stop you.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
That's not selfishish.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
It is no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
No, it's not selfish because you have to take care
of yourself so that you can be there for your
kids and you have to stay healthy.
Speaker 12 (14:25):
Well, that's true.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
You're taking care of yourself so you can be a
better caretaker and okay father figure.
Speaker 12 (14:32):
Yes, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
I don't want you to feel like it's selfish.
Speaker 12 (14:36):
Okay, I don't. I don't think itself is in a
bad way. But I think it's I feel like it's
it is. It is a self serving act, you know what.
You know. I also I also want to keep myself
in shape so I feel better. Yes, right, I mean,
I you know, being being there for my kids and
(14:57):
being a better father for my kids. And it's sort
of a byproduct, but I feel, you know, I don't
I don't ever want to be that guy. And I
was talking to another actor friend of mine about this
the other night and just talking about, you know, like
getting older and how you know, as we get older,
our bodies start eating all our muscle mass, and so
it's really important to you know, to resistance train and
(15:19):
keep your skin bag full so you get because if
you know, once your body eats all its muscle, then
then your bones start to get brittle and you fall
over and you break a hip and next thing you know,
you're you're home sucking a brew. Now that doesn't work there,
I mean.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
The aging thing. It's good to know that you have
conversations like that with your friends, because I do too. Yeah,
conversations I never saw myself having, but they matter. They
mean something to me. And sharing like knowledge and information
with people my same age worrying or thinking or focusing
(15:59):
on this things is so important. Yeah, that's one of
the reasons I love doing this podcast because we can
really share a lot of a lot of information with
a lot of people. And I think you're that message
of that what you're doing and choosing yourself for yourself
and as a byproduct for your family, there's nothing wrong.
That's that's what it's all about, is taking care of
(16:20):
yourself because guess what nobody else.
Speaker 6 (16:23):
Is going to do it?
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Goshcha Oliver Hudson, how do you find your own peace
and wholeness? What was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 13 (16:33):
Mmmm?
Speaker 7 (16:36):
This, it's a good question.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
The last time you said I'm gonna do this for myself.
Speaker 7 (16:41):
I choose Okay. This is great because I think there
are little things. I think you have to choose yourself
at times, many times in the day, little things I
really do I'm going to take this more for myself.
They're the big ones. But I think every day you
(17:02):
have to You have to choose yourself, even if you
have kids, even if you're busy, even if you're you know,
in a workplace. There are the moments where you're choosing
you every day. You have to find that, you know.
I think my big choose me moment was probably in November.
I go on these big fishing trips. Ten days I'm
(17:24):
out to see you can barely get a hold of
me and leave out of San Diego. I'm on a boat.
Don't get off the boat near in the middle of
the ocean, just catching tuna and with the twenty eight people,
you know, random people who now I know after being
on this specific trip. And again, Aaron's amazing and she
knows it's a passion of mine. But you know, I'm
(17:44):
choosing that this is something that I need to do.
It's personal. I love it, it's cleansing. It's the most as
cathartic as you can get in the middle of the ocean,
doing what I love to do and just separating, you know.
So that was my last like choose me moment. And
I'm gone for ten plus days, and it's it's a
long time to be away from the family when I'm
(18:05):
not working, and you know, I do it all well,
it fills you up here.
Speaker 14 (18:10):
Oh my gosh, yeah.
Speaker 7 (18:12):
One hundred percent. And then her, she has hers too.
You know, she's big on her friends, and she goes
to sleepovers, you know, for two or three nights and
I'm with the kids, or you know, she just did
a whole trip to New York with all of her
girlfriends for four nights, you know, and you know, I
think relating it to relationships, you have to let your
(18:32):
partner have those choose me moments whenever the hell they want,
you know.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Yeah, I've learned that kind of the hard way. I
used to be like I felt left out. I don't
know if that's jealousy. I felt. I would feel left out,
I would feel like unincluded, like you know, I had
all those very unhelpful feelings. And then something just sort
of changed where I was like, Okay, you are your
own person. You have your own needs, and I have
(18:57):
my own needs, and there's nothing wrong with each of
us having the things that you know, fill us up
and they don't. They're not always going to be the
same things. Of course, of course we're different people.
Speaker 7 (19:08):
Yeah, one pillar, that codependency. That one. If you're going
to hold up a big stone, you know, slab, one
pillar right there's going to be effected, the wind might blow.
That ship is much easier, it's easier, going to be
easier to tip. And that's the codependency. If you've got two,
that ship is going to stand strong, you know what
(19:29):
I mean, whether that's family, relationship, whatever it is. You know,
that's why you need to have separate lives. You need
to have dependent and relationships independent of each other gets
way too messy. And I've seen it so much with
friends or it's like a dear but what it's up,
(19:49):
you know, like you need to have your own ship.
I mean it's so important and refreshing and you know
it's energizing.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Chelsea Hand. I know you've worked so hard this year.
How have you learned to choose yourself anytime?
Speaker 15 (20:06):
Now that I'm resistant towards anything, I just go for it.
Speaker 11 (20:09):
I'm like, oh, yes, you have.
Speaker 14 (20:11):
To do it.
Speaker 13 (20:11):
Like I'm really bad at dancing, and I'm decided I'm
just going to start dancing.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
I'm very self conscious.
Speaker 5 (20:17):
I know I'm a bad dancer, and i feel like
everyone's staring at me, and I'm like, you know what,
this is good. You're going to start dancing at fifty
and it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
That you were kind of dancing just like solo dancing,
any dancing.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Like I can't even dance to a beat, like at
the tailor shoone, like just go two step and you
feel like you.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Want to dance, but you hold yourself back because it's
not nobody needs to see that.
Speaker 13 (20:38):
Yes, yeah, totally like self conscious It's like, my self
conscious thing is my dancing, and.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
You should be free to just dance. I'm happy you
get to dance the whole year of your I no.
Speaker 5 (20:49):
I'm gonna I'm gonna start dancing and not care what
anyone thinks.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
I love this. This is good.
Speaker 13 (20:54):
Yeah, because I need I need new challenges, you know,
need something else to like be like, Okay, this is
I haven't done.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
I haven't done a lot of acting work recently.
Speaker 11 (21:02):
I'm going to do that decided.
Speaker 8 (21:04):
I'm like, I'm going to do stuff that isn't in
my comfort zone.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
It's like a beauty of it.
Speaker 15 (21:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 13 (21:10):
I feel like fifty is like a reset, like a reset,
like okay.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
Now let me go around.
Speaker 13 (21:15):
It's like you're going back into the hotel room to
look and see what you forgot right before you check out.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
You're like, okay, you let me do one more.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Past my embiolic. You inspire so many people every day.
What was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 10 (21:31):
Wow?
Speaker 14 (21:32):
What was my last I choose me moment?
Speaker 3 (21:36):
You know?
Speaker 14 (21:36):
I was supposed to go to a screening Friday night
to support a friend of mine, and I really wasn't
feeling well. I was listening to my body. And it
was so hard because everything in me was like, go,
you'll be fine, it's okay, blah blah blah, like all
(21:58):
the things like what will they think of me?
Speaker 3 (22:00):
What will like this?
Speaker 14 (22:01):
And I built it up so much and I finally
said to this friend, I was honest. I said I'm
not feeling well and I'm very sorry. I'm not going
to be able to come. And his response was like,
I know how much you love and support me. It's
totally fine. What I'm most excited about is that you're
(22:22):
taking care of yourself.
Speaker 16 (22:23):
Oh, and it doesn't always work like that.
Speaker 14 (22:25):
A lot of times you'll stand up for yourself and
people will be like, you let me down?
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Why not this?
Speaker 14 (22:30):
But it was like a great It was a message
from the universe giving me permission to literally listen to
my body.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
And it was like, there's just yeah.
Speaker 14 (22:40):
And it didn't just make me feel better that I
didn't have to like go out late at night to
this thing.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
It was that I.
Speaker 14 (22:45):
Got that elevator lift feeling for myself, like oh, you're
allowed to advocate for yourself and if you don't feel good,
it's okay. That was a really big one you know,
I watched Family Feud and went to bed.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Oh good night. That's a good night. And that's the
whole point of this podcast. And what I talk about
is that letting people know that it is okay to
choose themselves. And you choose yourself, and you also realized
in that moment, oh, choosing myself feels really good. Ever, Carodane,
(23:21):
what was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 16 (23:23):
I've been thinking about this a lot good.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
And I have two.
Speaker 16 (23:29):
On my I choose me is my garden.
Speaker 11 (23:32):
I don't have a gardener.
Speaker 16 (23:34):
I do our gardening. I do our planting, I do
our trimming, and so like, if I find myself sort
of in the La crazies or spinning, I will just
put my gardening gloves on and my clogs and prune
and weed and we have sort of like a little
English garden and I'm proud of it and I love
how it makes me feel. The other day I did
(23:55):
it barefoot. I was like, maybe that'll be like grounding.
Maybe it's like yeah thing or something like that. That
and then the other thing I did I sort of
was it's so funny when someone's like, what's your choose me?
And you're like, I don't know. I have kids.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
I choose them, A lot of people say.
Speaker 16 (24:10):
But at the end of twenty twenty three, I sort of,
you know how, everyone on social media posts like these
are the books I read this year and Obama's list,
and I'm like, Obama read fifty five books? Like what
am I doing with my time? So at the beginning
of twenty four I started a book group and the
goal was a book a month. And the book group
(24:30):
is kicking ass, and it's this incredible group of like
it's like ten to fifteen of us. We meet every
month and we read a book or two a month
and it's totally awesome and it is a non negotiable.
I have book group on the first Wednesday of every
month period. End of story.
Speaker 9 (24:47):
That's mine.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
I love that. Who's in your book group?
Speaker 16 (24:49):
Who's in my book group? But there's a lot of
people in my book girl you might know as Meredith
Salinger is in my book group, Meredithsealeah, and then a
lot of moms who I've met over the years, either
through preschool or school. And then some other women in
the book group brought in a friend and we all
just sort of mesh great, it's been really it's I
highly recommend a book.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
What book are you reading right now?
Speaker 7 (25:11):
Then?
Speaker 16 (25:11):
Currently we are reading two books because we're like that.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
I know, we're reading over Achievers.
Speaker 16 (25:17):
I know, we just read East of Eden. So we're
sort of revisiting some classics, which if you haven't read,
I really.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
It's been a million.
Speaker 16 (25:25):
It's really good. We read it during the fires, and
it's really a love letter to California. We're reading House
of Mirth, and then we're reading a collection of essays
by a friend called Mothers and Other fictional Characters, which
is also wonderful. And I know the author, Nicole, and
so she's going to zoom in at our next book
group and we're all going to get to kind of
(25:47):
chat with her about her memoir.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
Oh that's exciting, fun, right, it's fun. I love it
that you did that. I heard that if you read
a book for even twenty minutes a day, it has
such significant help of your mental health.
Speaker 16 (26:02):
Absolutely, and like you know a lot of us, I
feel like, and I say this with no judgment, Like
end of the day, I'd be sitting on the chair
looking at my.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
Phone and I was like scrolling.
Speaker 3 (26:11):
Oh, but I want my.
Speaker 16 (26:12):
Kids to see me doing so. I really make an
effort to just at the end of the day for
fifteen minutes or a chapter and just sit out there
and then if they need something, they come out. When
they find me, I have a book in my hand
and my phone.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
I love that. You just inspired me. Thank you. Yes,
I'm going to pick up a book instead of my
phone today when I have it.
Speaker 16 (26:33):
Like ten minutes do it?
Speaker 1 (26:37):
I see mets before I let you go. What was
your last I choose me moment? Oh oh oh could
be today, It could be yesterday, I.
Speaker 11 (26:47):
Can yeah, yeah, for sure. I think it was getting
up and going to the gym, right, Like I chose that,
like I didn't want to me afterward, but starting to day.
That is a little in my little bank, my confidence bank,
(27:10):
or my choosing myself bank, for sure, take a little.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
How do you do that when you're working all the time.
It's you know, I hear people that get up at
four am, five am.
Speaker 11 (27:23):
What I'm like, what, Well, you know, what's weird? I
had no qualms about getting up at four am to
go to set, so okay, so what okay is it?
Because like I can do it for the people why
can't do it for myself?
Speaker 1 (27:37):
You're doing You're doing it because that's your job, right,
But taking care of yourself is your job.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 11 (27:45):
Yeah, so I had to really shift that perspective. I
was like, oh no, like Christy, and as we know,
like spending eighteen hours on the set, you've got to
be in somewhat sort of shape for the endurance to
you know, a long day and what you're doing as well.
Speaker 15 (28:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 11 (28:07):
So I think for today, like that was certainly something
I started my day with and it sets the tone.
Speaker 6 (28:14):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
It definitely like revs yup for the rest of your day.
Speaker 9 (28:18):
Right.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
I love that feeling.
Speaker 11 (28:19):
Yeah, I know. I'm like, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 8 (28:21):
She did it.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
Oh Molly Sims, what was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 3 (28:30):
I think I choose.
Speaker 10 (28:34):
It's gonna make me cry, It's okay, I think instead
of I choose me, I chose us.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
What does that mean to you?
Speaker 10 (28:48):
Just having that, you know, the beginning of being able
to say no to things, to say yes to us,
to say yes to me, to to I choose me
to You know, that's not going to really work for
me right now. And those are really hard words because
I love. I'm from the South. I love to please everyone.
Speaker 4 (29:08):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 10 (29:10):
You know, I've lost some friends along the way because
I really couldn't do any more than what I was doing.
Speaker 9 (29:19):
You know.
Speaker 10 (29:19):
I think with COVID, the fires, you know, losing my
mom and dad, I I cautiously had to take a
step back to choose me.
Speaker 9 (29:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
How does that feel?
Speaker 10 (29:40):
I mean uncomfortable, you know, really, you know, I you know,
I love when people be like, oh, she's not going
to do that. Like Michael, who's my publicist on this
podcast listening right now, He's like, you know what, she's
going to not do it right now, We're going to
revisit this. And like I was like, oh god, I
think you thank you for saying that, you know, like
(30:01):
just really trying to choose me, right, like having people
around me that help me choose me, because if not,
I'm like, you know, I'll just be like, oh I'll
help you do okay, Yeah, no worries, just call me,
I'll interview like oh, well, you know, I but at
choosing me has been a lifesaver in a lot of
ways because there's only so much I can do. I
(30:22):
have to be there for my kids. I only have
so much band with But it takes a lot of honesty, right,
it takes a lot of And I used to do
this as like when I would work and come like
I'm sure you did, when you would come off a
show or you'd come off a stint, or you'd come
off you know, six weeks, ten weeks, three months, you know,
(30:44):
because you did network television, so you were on what
twenty three twenty four episodes was yearly, year round, right,
So when you go on those marathon runs and you stop,
it's like, hey, you.
Speaker 3 (30:58):
Don't even know what to do with your no.
Speaker 10 (31:02):
And b you know, for you then you had three
young girls with Peter and both of your like it
just it gets crazy. Yeah, it's crazy, and then life
happens in top of it. So I think I choose me.
I've chosen me. I choose me in those moments because
(31:23):
I have to do.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
You feel like it's you choosing to reconnect with yourself
and your truth instead of.
Speaker 10 (31:30):
Yeah, yeah, we just level it out, we least balance it,
we balance it out. We kind of start back to zero,
you know. I did I do acupuncture and I'm like, girl,
I was like, I don't know, I can't sleep anymore.
I'm like sweat and like and I was like, you
(31:50):
know all the things that you're going through, and I
was like, I was like, You've got to help me.
I'm like, I just can't sleep. Literally, like in thirty seconds.
Speaker 11 (31:59):
She left my room.
Speaker 14 (31:59):
I was I was like snoring right.
Speaker 10 (32:02):
Like I just needed someone to like just call me.
That has been really good for me in my sense
of just sense of getting back grounded and just have
it again. That's an hour and fifteen minutes just for me.
I took a walk the other day and I'm like,
(32:24):
I'm not gonna go to that sports thing and they
were so upsetting.
Speaker 7 (32:27):
What do you mean?
Speaker 3 (32:28):
What do you mean you're not gonna go.
Speaker 10 (32:30):
I'm like, kids, Mom's gonna take a walk and I'm
not gonna call you. I'm not gonna talk to you.
I don't don't care how you do. I'm just gonna
go take a walk.
Speaker 9 (32:41):
You know.
Speaker 10 (32:41):
But those check ins are important.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
Yeah, you got to listen to your needs. You gotta
put yourself first sometimes. And I'm so happy to hear
that you're doing that because it's vital. Tammeron Hall, what
was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 13 (32:57):
Oh, that's a great one. Oh my last she use
me moment?
Speaker 4 (33:02):
Oh it was this morning.
Speaker 13 (33:04):
So yesterday I had a very early morning and I
had a very intimidating thing that I had to face
and it took a lot of I actually that shy
kid and me showed up yesterday and I had to
deal with her and do this event that I wasn't
prepared for.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Proud of me.
Speaker 13 (33:22):
So this morning, when it was time to wake up
and get my son ready for school, I fought mom
guilt as if one morning of not getting him ready
versus his dad was going to somehow change the trajectory
of his entire life. And I laid in bed and
I did it. Get up and I let my husband
warm the carrot muffin, And not that he wouldn't, but
(33:45):
sometimes even when he's willing to will when he does
do it. And he does it every morning with me.
But I feel guilty if I don't not out there,
like if I'm not you know.
Speaker 7 (33:55):
Give me the kids, you know.
Speaker 13 (33:56):
And I was like, my kid knows he loves me
and I love him, and I'm going to stay in
this bid.
Speaker 11 (34:03):
Have a good day, kiddout.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
Oh my god, that's a good one. Just stay in bed,
Bill Rosenthal, what was your last I Choose me moment?
Speaker 15 (34:16):
Oh?
Speaker 7 (34:17):
I guess right before I got on with you, which
is a very good I choose me moment. Talk to you.
Speaker 9 (34:24):
Uh, I was on the elliptical for a half hour.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
That great, Right, So.
Speaker 15 (34:31):
Not only do I do weights in the morning, but
I find another spot if I want to watch TV.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Don't just sit there, get get up and move a
little bit. Make you do feel better? Yeah, move, move,
move a little yeah. Yeah. Holly Madison, what was your
last I choose me moment?
Speaker 15 (34:51):
This is just so simple and silly, but I just
have to choose to enjoy life because I'm really achievement oriented,
and I tend to throughout my life go through different
phases of like having anxiety of not having achieved enough,
or I'm not on track or I haven't done this yet.
And every day like I'm looking at it right now
because I'm sitting in front of my window, like I
(35:12):
love my backyard. It's so pretty, and every day almost
I take a picture of it and I post up
my Instagram story and I'm like, it's a perfect day.
And I just remind myself to like choose to love
life every day because you could have the most amazing life,
which I feel like I do, and still fall into
this weird funk where you feel like you don't have enough,
you're not achieving enough, and no, no, you just have
(35:33):
to choose to love life.
Speaker 11 (35:36):
So that's mine.
Speaker 1 (35:36):
I Choose Me moment, and there you have it. Happy
Holidays from I Choose Me. We love you. Thank you
for being here and for listening, and especially for choosing
yourself with me.
You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Garl. Hello
and Happy holidays, Happy Holidays, Welcome to I Choose Me.
This podcast is all about making choices, choices that help
create peace and wholeness for you and the people you love.
(00:24):
Doesn't that sound good? This year, I have had the
honor of sitting down with some really incredible guests. I've
been so lucky to have shared some really powerful stories
but also some powerful ways to choose yourself during the holidays,
which can be the hardest time to take care of
(00:44):
our own needs. Let's be honest before we hear from
my fab friends Gabrielle Carteris Evett, Nicole Brown, Candace Cameron
Beret and others. Let me share my very favorite and
very easy I Choose Me moment for this season and
something I'm gonna do. Choose a holiday tradition because you
(01:06):
love it, not because they love it. It could be
watching your favorite holiday movie because you want to watch it.
Don't let them pick the movie. It could be a
recipe that brings back those childhood memories, or maybe you
know something that's going on in your neighborhood. Pick a
(01:26):
local Christmas eve service you know with beautiful music just
make you feel so good. So pick one ritual that
fills you up and make it non negotiable. Because when
you anchor yourself in something that brings you real comfort,
it naturally softens everything else around you. So cheers to
(01:51):
choosing yourself this holiday. Here are some tips from my
friends to have a happy and stress free holiday season.
Candice Cameron Burray, what is the one way that you
find to choose yourself during the holidays to enjoy the
holiday amidst all of the chaos of the season.
Speaker 2 (02:13):
That's fun day.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
It's it's hard because Christmas is, especially when you've raised kids,
it's a lot of work. It's a ton of work,
and you're tired.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
I think, I know, I can I answer this into
you choose which answer you want.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
I love decorating my Christmas tree and I usually do
it on myself because no one wants to help me,
to be honest, but.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
I love it.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
And so I put a Christmas movie on, which is
usually White Christmas or like Miracle on thirty four Streets,
something old, and I just love it, but usually White
Christmas because I love the dancing in it, and I
just I just decorate like by myself, no when no
one else is around, and I like, I love it.
(03:03):
This makes me really happy during the holidays. The other
thing I like in that during Christmas time is I
need everyone to get dressed up. One night. I need
to put on like the Christmas outfit, and nobody ever
wants to do that.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
But I don't know why.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Everyone wants to stay cozy and pjs. But I like
to get like one night of a holiday Christmas y dressed,
fancy cocktail night kind of thing. And I don't know.
I feel like I force everyone to go to something
during the holidays that they don't want to. So mama
wants to get dressed up.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Oh, I think that's great, Jen hat Maker, give me
one tip, one way we can choose ourselves during the
holiday season.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
Oh my god, do not be afraid to say no.
Do not be afraid. You will not ruin everybody's Christmas.
You will not ruin your Christmas. You will not ruin
Christmas itself. If something comes up and it feels like
too much, too long, too far, too hard, too busy,
(04:18):
you with no equivocation, can say thank you so much
for inviting me. I cannot I won't be able to
make that, or I will not be able to put
up a second Christmas tree this year, or I will
not be able to be in that gift exchange, or
I can't come to that party. Thank you, So do
not be afraid to say no. Everybody is inviting everybody
(04:39):
to everything everywhere. So I spent a lot of Christmas
is trying to please everybody who wanted me to be anywhere,
and it was disastrous. So this is your season. You
chart your path, You build out your own rhythms in
a way that feels like delightful to you.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
Perfect Theresa Kabudo, I'm just gonna ask you, how do
you choose yourself during the craziness of Christmas.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Oh, I think it's easier now because my kids are old,
so it's it's easier. But I always put a present
under the tree from Santa to Teresa.
Speaker 6 (05:20):
You are a smart Oh.
Speaker 5 (05:21):
Yeah, I love I love gifts. I love shopping. I
just I just I just love things.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Well, speaking of shopping, be sure to check out your
beautiful jewelry line Divinely Guided, Finely Guided.
Speaker 7 (05:37):
Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
It's so special.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
I mean I really just wanted to create something because
Heaven and Earth really do meat at the smallest moments,
and I want everyone to find that. And that's why,
like even the pieces of wearing tete like this this
cross that we just it's a for our QBC to
kind of give people, no matter what faith they are,
to give them that kind of little their little faith back.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
Just a little reminder.
Speaker 5 (06:01):
This is the let the light impendent.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
Okay, you I got that one. That's the one you
sent me. That's the light dependent.
Speaker 5 (06:08):
Yeah, because in our darkest times we have to remember
to let the light in. And this is when the
light hits this. You can see it like it reflects it,
but it also comes in and it's surrounded by on
the top it says grounding strength and power to remind
ourselves to ground us and that we have the strength
and power to let the light in even in our
(06:31):
darkest moment.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Oh my gosh, I gotta go put it on.
Speaker 5 (06:35):
See and then I'm also wearing what my rosary beats.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
Oh my gosh, that's so good. How does Evette Nicole
Brown get through the chaos of the holidays woo.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
By not partaking in any of it?
Speaker 8 (06:52):
I answer, I've heard telling you. I don't. I don't
trick or treat. I don't dress up for halle Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3 (06:59):
I usually get me a.
Speaker 8 (07:00):
Little smoked turkey breast from a honey baked ham, like
two weeks before Thanksgiving and make my little meal. And
by the time everybody else eating Thanksgiving, I've already had
my turkey and sweet potatoes over and over again. And
then when it comes to Christmas, you know, I don't
do the family card, I don't do the year letter.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
I feel repulsed by both of those things.
Speaker 3 (07:25):
Yeah, I just think like I can't. I don't have it.
Speaker 8 (07:27):
I don't remember what happened yesterday. Let alone tell you
what happened in January and walk you through it.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
And I may have a Christmas tree that's been up
for two years.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
Oh it's just ready.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
So that song.
Speaker 8 (07:40):
We need a little Christmas right this very minute, going
to the family room. There's some Christmas body.
Speaker 3 (07:43):
So I honestly do not. I don't deal with any
of it. I don't do any of it.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
Well, Merry Christmas, happening, all the things forever, we don't
ever have to talk about it again.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Yeah, I don't do it.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Hard enough, I don't want it, says take it easy
on yourselves people.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
That's what I'm trying to tell people. Y'all better relax.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
How about you enjoy the day?
Speaker 9 (08:04):
How about.
Speaker 10 (08:06):
All right?
Speaker 1 (08:06):
Thank you so much for spending time with me. I
really love seeing you.
Speaker 3 (08:10):
Yes, thank you, Brooke Broke.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
What is the one way that you find to separate
yourself from the chaos that is the holiday season?
Speaker 9 (08:22):
So hard? Holidays have always been madness around my house.
I bett they're organizing the clean up. I love the
family time.
Speaker 11 (08:33):
It's hard.
Speaker 9 (08:34):
I feel like my children are older now, so it's
a little bit less is more. You remember the days
of trying to do all these We still do stockings,
by the way, even for my older kids. It's fun
thing in our house. But letting them really, I guess,
get involved and make some wishes and get the more
significant thing instead of a bunch. But I don't compromise
(08:55):
my wellness around the holidays. I find that yoga is
my reset, my therapy, it's my medicine. It's calming for me. Lately,
I'm trying to do one class in the evening because
it helps me really wind down and drop into a
greater sleep state. But I'm walking a lot trying to
take some digestion walks because there's more food, there's more flavors,
(09:18):
there's more decades we're drinking, like whatever your jam is.
There's just a lot more going on. And I maybe
add in a class. It schedule allows during the holidays.
One of the reasons why I like the app world
or the digital world, whether it's with me or somebody else,
even on YouTube, get free content. I don't have to
drive anywhere or go anywhere. I can kind of say
thirty forty minutes and it helps me reset so much
(09:42):
of what I do in fitnesses for my head, my energy,
and my strap and I'm in a much better mood after.
Speaker 11 (09:48):
That work out.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
That's good for the holidays. Everybody wants mama to be
happy during the holidays and not straight.
Speaker 9 (09:56):
It's fun. Maybe you'll join us. We do it a
live stream a turkey burn, a like post turkey sodio
burn Thanksgiving. So it's really I just do it from
your own home. But I think fitness has to be fun,
and it's fun during the holidays to do it with family, friends,
love and just.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Take a walk.
Speaker 9 (10:14):
Yeah yeah, just take a walk, move your body.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Family walks on my list, got it. Gabrielle Carterris. The
holiday season is here.
Speaker 4 (10:25):
It is upon us.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
What do you do to choose yourself during the holidays
to keep saying and to truly enjoy them?
Speaker 6 (10:31):
The holidays are not as hard for me to get
through with peace. So what I say for me enjoy
whatever to get through peace. Make sure to give time
to yourself. I find I am committed to it at
least an hour a day, that's just myself.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
What do you do?
Speaker 6 (10:48):
I get up very early. I get five o'clock. Yeah,
today was four thirty, but at five o'clock I have
thirty I try not to go on my phone. Right
sometimes I do, I go, but I go away from it.
I have a cup of tea. Sometimes I stand outside
just to smell the air because I think that's to
(11:10):
remember where I'm at. And then like today, I woke
up at six thirty, but when the sun came up
to quarter seven, because I won't walk outside by myself
other than I went to start on a three mile
walk and I just smell the air and I literally
just live in gratitude in that moment. That's what I
try to do. And so this holiday will be the
(11:32):
same thing for me, I'll take that time because I
will hope to carry with my to my family. But
for me, because I I'm in a good place with
my family. We're not all there and I know that,
but I would say, family or loved ones, take the
time to see them, don't rush through that moment. Maybe
even let them know what they do for you in
(11:53):
your life.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
And just.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
For me, I will be living in gratitude. I feel
very blessed, and I will shower them all with the
love that I have. And I love this time of year.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
You're a big entertainer. You must be excited.
Speaker 6 (12:09):
It's gonna be great. I'll have tons of parties on
everybody for dinner. I just love it. I love cooking
for everybody. I don't even have to talk. I can
just like listen to them talk. It makes me very happy.
It's my my happy place. You're such a giver, very lucky.
What will you be doing. I get up.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
Earlier now so I have that buff buffer, so that
I know I have time to not look at my phone.
Nobody's awake yet, I don't have to deal with anything.
Speaker 6 (12:38):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
It's quiet, it's quiet. I usually do a little. I
learned this from Brook Burk. Do a little red mask
therapy while I'm meditating in the morning, while I'm thinking
of the things I'm grateful for.
Speaker 6 (12:48):
Great.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Then from there great kind of hit the ground running.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
And the busier you get, the more you have to
take time for yourself. Yes, that's great, Jen, because you
know what, I really believe this, If you take some
time to yourself, more time for Jayley and the holidays,
when you're feeling and you're up against the wall, you'll
get more done.
Speaker 1 (13:05):
You get more done, You're just more present. And isn't
that what the holidays are supposed to be about.
Speaker 6 (13:10):
It's because all this is make believe. But even that
you're doing this stuff, it's all great. Yeah, your family
and your friends in your life, that's the real truth.
I'd pray that's what I'm going to think about you.
But you have that This holiday thank you.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Isn't Gabrielle the best. My guests shared some beautiful I
Choose Me moments for the holidays. But the truth is
these reminders aren't just seasonal. They're kind of like tools
that help us find peace and wholeness all year long.
So congratulations for taking this. I choose me moment to
be with me right now. Here are some more from
(13:51):
this year's conversations with my amazing and wise friends Jason Priestley.
What was your last I Choose me moment?
Speaker 12 (14:01):
You know what, I choose me almost every day when
I go to pilates because it is a totally selfish endeavor.
And whether I'm going there or I'm just going to
the gym. You know, I work out six days a week.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
But that's not selfish.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
I got to stop you.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
That's not selfishish.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
It is no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
No, it's not selfish because you have to take care
of yourself so that you can be there for your
kids and you have to stay healthy.
Speaker 12 (14:25):
Well, that's true.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
You're taking care of yourself so you can be a
better caretaker and okay father figure.
Speaker 12 (14:32):
Yes, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
I don't want you to feel like it's selfish.
Speaker 12 (14:36):
Okay, I don't. I don't think itself is in a
bad way. But I think it's I feel like it's
it is. It is a self serving act, you know what.
You know. I also I also want to keep myself
in shape so I feel better. Yes, right, I mean,
I you know, being being there for my kids and
(14:57):
being a better father for my kids. And it's sort
of a byproduct, but I feel, you know, I don't
I don't ever want to be that guy. And I
was talking to another actor friend of mine about this
the other night and just talking about, you know, like
getting older and how you know, as we get older,
our bodies start eating all our muscle mass, and so
it's really important to you know, to resistance train and
(15:19):
keep your skin bag full so you get because if
you know, once your body eats all its muscle, then
then your bones start to get brittle and you fall
over and you break a hip and next thing you know,
you're you're home sucking a brew. Now that doesn't work there,
I mean.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
The aging thing. It's good to know that you have
conversations like that with your friends, because I do too. Yeah,
conversations I never saw myself having, but they matter. They
mean something to me. And sharing like knowledge and information
with people my same age worrying or thinking or focusing
(15:59):
on this things is so important. Yeah, that's one of
the reasons I love doing this podcast because we can
really share a lot of a lot of information with
a lot of people. And I think you're that message
of that what you're doing and choosing yourself for yourself
and as a byproduct for your family, there's nothing wrong.
That's that's what it's all about, is taking care of
(16:20):
yourself because guess what nobody else.
Speaker 6 (16:23):
Is going to do it?
Speaker 1 (16:24):
Goshcha Oliver Hudson, how do you find your own peace
and wholeness? What was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 13 (16:33):
Mmmm?
Speaker 7 (16:36):
This, it's a good question.
Speaker 1 (16:38):
The last time you said I'm gonna do this for myself.
Speaker 7 (16:41):
I choose Okay. This is great because I think there
are little things. I think you have to choose yourself
at times, many times in the day, little things I
really do I'm going to take this more for myself.
They're the big ones. But I think every day you
(17:02):
have to You have to choose yourself, even if you
have kids, even if you're busy, even if you're you know,
in a workplace. There are the moments where you're choosing
you every day. You have to find that, you know.
I think my big choose me moment was probably in November.
I go on these big fishing trips. Ten days I'm
(17:24):
out to see you can barely get a hold of
me and leave out of San Diego. I'm on a boat.
Don't get off the boat near in the middle of
the ocean, just catching tuna and with the twenty eight people,
you know, random people who now I know after being
on this specific trip. And again, Aaron's amazing and she
knows it's a passion of mine. But you know, I'm
(17:44):
choosing that this is something that I need to do.
It's personal. I love it, it's cleansing. It's the most as
cathartic as you can get in the middle of the ocean,
doing what I love to do and just separating, you know.
So that was my last like choose me moment. And
I'm gone for ten plus days, and it's it's a
long time to be away from the family when I'm
(18:05):
not working, and you know, I do it all well,
it fills you up here.
Speaker 14 (18:10):
Oh my gosh, yeah.
Speaker 7 (18:12):
One hundred percent. And then her, she has hers too.
You know, she's big on her friends, and she goes
to sleepovers, you know, for two or three nights and
I'm with the kids, or you know, she just did
a whole trip to New York with all of her
girlfriends for four nights, you know, and you know, I
think relating it to relationships, you have to let your
(18:32):
partner have those choose me moments whenever the hell they want,
you know.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Yeah, I've learned that kind of the hard way. I
used to be like I felt left out. I don't
know if that's jealousy. I felt. I would feel left out,
I would feel like unincluded, like you know, I had
all those very unhelpful feelings. And then something just sort
of changed where I was like, Okay, you are your
own person. You have your own needs, and I have
(18:57):
my own needs, and there's nothing wrong with each of
us having the things that you know, fill us up
and they don't. They're not always going to be the
same things. Of course, of course we're different people.
Speaker 7 (19:08):
Yeah, one pillar, that codependency. That one. If you're going
to hold up a big stone, you know, slab, one
pillar right there's going to be effected, the wind might blow.
That ship is much easier, it's easier, going to be
easier to tip. And that's the codependency. If you've got two,
that ship is going to stand strong, you know what
(19:29):
I mean, whether that's family, relationship, whatever it is. You know,
that's why you need to have separate lives. You need
to have dependent and relationships independent of each other gets
way too messy. And I've seen it so much with
friends or it's like a dear but what it's up,
(19:49):
you know, like you need to have your own ship.
I mean it's so important and refreshing and you know
it's energizing.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Chelsea Hand. I know you've worked so hard this year.
How have you learned to choose yourself anytime?
Speaker 15 (20:06):
Now that I'm resistant towards anything, I just go for it.
Speaker 11 (20:09):
I'm like, oh, yes, you have.
Speaker 14 (20:11):
To do it.
Speaker 13 (20:11):
Like I'm really bad at dancing, and I'm decided I'm
just going to start dancing.
Speaker 3 (20:16):
I'm very self conscious.
Speaker 5 (20:17):
I know I'm a bad dancer, and i feel like
everyone's staring at me, and I'm like, you know what,
this is good. You're going to start dancing at fifty
and it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
That you were kind of dancing just like solo dancing,
any dancing.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Like I can't even dance to a beat, like at
the tailor shoone, like just go two step and you
feel like you.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Want to dance, but you hold yourself back because it's
not nobody needs to see that.
Speaker 13 (20:38):
Yes, yeah, totally like self conscious It's like, my self
conscious thing is my dancing, and.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
You should be free to just dance. I'm happy you
get to dance the whole year of your I no.
Speaker 5 (20:49):
I'm gonna I'm gonna start dancing and not care what
anyone thinks.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
I love this. This is good.
Speaker 13 (20:54):
Yeah, because I need I need new challenges, you know,
need something else to like be like, Okay, this is
I haven't done.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
I haven't done a lot of acting work recently.
Speaker 11 (21:02):
I'm going to do that decided.
Speaker 8 (21:04):
I'm like, I'm going to do stuff that isn't in
my comfort zone.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
It's like a beauty of it.
Speaker 15 (21:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 13 (21:10):
I feel like fifty is like a reset, like a reset,
like okay.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
Now let me go around.
Speaker 13 (21:15):
It's like you're going back into the hotel room to
look and see what you forgot right before you check out.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
You're like, okay, you let me do one more.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Past my embiolic. You inspire so many people every day.
What was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 10 (21:31):
Wow?
Speaker 14 (21:32):
What was my last I choose me moment?
Speaker 3 (21:36):
You know?
Speaker 14 (21:36):
I was supposed to go to a screening Friday night
to support a friend of mine, and I really wasn't
feeling well. I was listening to my body. And it
was so hard because everything in me was like, go,
you'll be fine, it's okay, blah blah blah, like all
(21:58):
the things like what will they think of me?
Speaker 3 (22:00):
What will like this?
Speaker 14 (22:01):
And I built it up so much and I finally
said to this friend, I was honest. I said I'm
not feeling well and I'm very sorry. I'm not going
to be able to come. And his response was like,
I know how much you love and support me. It's
totally fine. What I'm most excited about is that you're
(22:22):
taking care of yourself.
Speaker 16 (22:23):
Oh, and it doesn't always work like that.
Speaker 14 (22:25):
A lot of times you'll stand up for yourself and
people will be like, you let me down?
Speaker 4 (22:29):
Why not this?
Speaker 14 (22:30):
But it was like a great It was a message
from the universe giving me permission to literally listen to
my body.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
And it was like, there's just yeah.
Speaker 14 (22:40):
And it didn't just make me feel better that I
didn't have to like go out late at night to
this thing.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
It was that I.
Speaker 14 (22:45):
Got that elevator lift feeling for myself, like oh, you're
allowed to advocate for yourself and if you don't feel good,
it's okay. That was a really big one you know,
I watched Family Feud and went to bed.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Oh good night. That's a good night. And that's the
whole point of this podcast. And what I talk about
is that letting people know that it is okay to
choose themselves. And you choose yourself, and you also realized
in that moment, oh, choosing myself feels really good. Ever, Carodane,
(23:21):
what was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 16 (23:23):
I've been thinking about this a lot good.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
And I have two.
Speaker 16 (23:29):
On my I choose me is my garden.
Speaker 11 (23:32):
I don't have a gardener.
Speaker 16 (23:34):
I do our gardening. I do our planting, I do
our trimming, and so like, if I find myself sort
of in the La crazies or spinning, I will just
put my gardening gloves on and my clogs and prune
and weed and we have sort of like a little
English garden and I'm proud of it and I love
how it makes me feel. The other day I did
(23:55):
it barefoot. I was like, maybe that'll be like grounding.
Maybe it's like yeah thing or something like that. That
and then the other thing I did I sort of
was it's so funny when someone's like, what's your choose me?
And you're like, I don't know. I have kids.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
I choose them, A lot of people say.
Speaker 16 (24:10):
But at the end of twenty twenty three, I sort of,
you know how, everyone on social media posts like these
are the books I read this year and Obama's list,
and I'm like, Obama read fifty five books? Like what
am I doing with my time? So at the beginning
of twenty four I started a book group and the
goal was a book a month. And the book group
(24:30):
is kicking ass, and it's this incredible group of like
it's like ten to fifteen of us. We meet every
month and we read a book or two a month
and it's totally awesome and it is a non negotiable.
I have book group on the first Wednesday of every
month period. End of story.
Speaker 9 (24:47):
That's mine.
Speaker 1 (24:47):
I love that. Who's in your book group?
Speaker 16 (24:49):
Who's in my book group? But there's a lot of
people in my book girl you might know as Meredith
Salinger is in my book group, Meredithsealeah, and then a
lot of moms who I've met over the years, either
through preschool or school. And then some other women in
the book group brought in a friend and we all
just sort of mesh great, it's been really it's I
highly recommend a book.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
What book are you reading right now?
Speaker 7 (25:11):
Then?
Speaker 16 (25:11):
Currently we are reading two books because we're like that.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
I know, we're reading over Achievers.
Speaker 16 (25:17):
I know, we just read East of Eden. So we're
sort of revisiting some classics, which if you haven't read,
I really.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
It's been a million.
Speaker 16 (25:25):
It's really good. We read it during the fires, and
it's really a love letter to California. We're reading House
of Mirth, and then we're reading a collection of essays
by a friend called Mothers and Other fictional Characters, which
is also wonderful. And I know the author, Nicole, and
so she's going to zoom in at our next book
group and we're all going to get to kind of
(25:47):
chat with her about her memoir.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
Oh that's exciting, fun, right, it's fun. I love it
that you did that. I heard that if you read
a book for even twenty minutes a day, it has
such significant help of your mental health.
Speaker 16 (26:02):
Absolutely, and like you know a lot of us, I
feel like, and I say this with no judgment, Like
end of the day, I'd be sitting on the chair
looking at my.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
Phone and I was like scrolling.
Speaker 3 (26:11):
Oh, but I want my.
Speaker 16 (26:12):
Kids to see me doing so. I really make an
effort to just at the end of the day for
fifteen minutes or a chapter and just sit out there
and then if they need something, they come out. When
they find me, I have a book in my hand
and my phone.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
I love that. You just inspired me. Thank you. Yes,
I'm going to pick up a book instead of my
phone today when I have it.
Speaker 16 (26:33):
Like ten minutes do it?
Speaker 1 (26:37):
I see mets before I let you go. What was
your last I choose me moment? Oh oh oh could
be today, It could be yesterday, I.
Speaker 11 (26:47):
Can yeah, yeah, for sure. I think it was getting
up and going to the gym, right, Like I chose that,
like I didn't want to me afterward, but starting to day.
That is a little in my little bank, my confidence bank,
(27:10):
or my choosing myself bank, for sure, take a little.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
How do you do that when you're working all the time.
It's you know, I hear people that get up at
four am, five am.
Speaker 11 (27:23):
What I'm like, what, Well, you know, what's weird? I
had no qualms about getting up at four am to
go to set, so okay, so what okay is it?
Because like I can do it for the people why
can't do it for myself?
Speaker 1 (27:37):
You're doing You're doing it because that's your job, right,
But taking care of yourself is your job.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 11 (27:45):
Yeah, so I had to really shift that perspective. I
was like, oh no, like Christy, and as we know,
like spending eighteen hours on the set, you've got to
be in somewhat sort of shape for the endurance to
you know, a long day and what you're doing as well.
Speaker 15 (28:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 11 (28:07):
So I think for today, like that was certainly something
I started my day with and it sets the tone.
Speaker 6 (28:14):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
It definitely like revs yup for the rest of your day.
Speaker 9 (28:18):
Right.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
I love that feeling.
Speaker 11 (28:19):
Yeah, I know. I'm like, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 8 (28:21):
She did it.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
Oh Molly Sims, what was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 3 (28:30):
I think I choose.
Speaker 10 (28:34):
It's gonna make me cry, It's okay, I think instead
of I choose me, I chose us.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
What does that mean to you?
Speaker 10 (28:48):
Just having that, you know, the beginning of being able
to say no to things, to say yes to us,
to say yes to me, to to I choose me
to You know, that's not going to really work for
me right now. And those are really hard words because
I love. I'm from the South. I love to please everyone.
Speaker 4 (29:08):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 10 (29:10):
You know, I've lost some friends along the way because
I really couldn't do any more than what I was doing.
Speaker 9 (29:19):
You know.
Speaker 10 (29:19):
I think with COVID, the fires, you know, losing my
mom and dad, I I cautiously had to take a
step back to choose me.
Speaker 9 (29:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
How does that feel?
Speaker 10 (29:40):
I mean uncomfortable, you know, really, you know, I you know,
I love when people be like, oh, she's not going
to do that. Like Michael, who's my publicist on this
podcast listening right now, He's like, you know what, she's
going to not do it right now, We're going to
revisit this. And like I was like, oh god, I
think you thank you for saying that, you know, like
(30:01):
just really trying to choose me, right, like having people
around me that help me choose me, because if not,
I'm like, you know, I'll just be like, oh I'll
help you do okay, Yeah, no worries, just call me,
I'll interview like oh, well, you know, I but at
choosing me has been a lifesaver in a lot of
ways because there's only so much I can do. I
(30:22):
have to be there for my kids. I only have
so much band with But it takes a lot of honesty, right,
it takes a lot of And I used to do
this as like when I would work and come like
I'm sure you did, when you would come off a
show or you'd come off a stint, or you'd come
off you know, six weeks, ten weeks, three months, you know,
(30:44):
because you did network television, so you were on what
twenty three twenty four episodes was yearly, year round, right,
So when you go on those marathon runs and you stop,
it's like, hey, you.
Speaker 3 (30:58):
Don't even know what to do with your no.
Speaker 10 (31:02):
And b you know, for you then you had three
young girls with Peter and both of your like it
just it gets crazy. Yeah, it's crazy, and then life
happens in top of it. So I think I choose me.
I've chosen me. I choose me in those moments because
(31:23):
I have to do.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
You feel like it's you choosing to reconnect with yourself
and your truth instead of.
Speaker 10 (31:30):
Yeah, yeah, we just level it out, we least balance it,
we balance it out. We kind of start back to zero,
you know. I did I do acupuncture and I'm like, girl,
I was like, I don't know, I can't sleep anymore.
I'm like sweat and like and I was like, you
(31:50):
know all the things that you're going through, and I
was like, I was like, You've got to help me.
I'm like, I just can't sleep. Literally, like in thirty seconds.
Speaker 11 (31:59):
She left my room.
Speaker 14 (31:59):
I was I was like snoring right.
Speaker 10 (32:02):
Like I just needed someone to like just call me.
That has been really good for me in my sense
of just sense of getting back grounded and just have
it again. That's an hour and fifteen minutes just for me.
I took a walk the other day and I'm like,
(32:24):
I'm not gonna go to that sports thing and they
were so upsetting.
Speaker 7 (32:27):
What do you mean?
Speaker 3 (32:28):
What do you mean you're not gonna go.
Speaker 10 (32:30):
I'm like, kids, Mom's gonna take a walk and I'm
not gonna call you. I'm not gonna talk to you.
I don't don't care how you do. I'm just gonna
go take a walk.
Speaker 9 (32:41):
You know.
Speaker 10 (32:41):
But those check ins are important.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
Yeah, you got to listen to your needs. You gotta
put yourself first sometimes. And I'm so happy to hear
that you're doing that because it's vital. Tammeron Hall, what
was your last I choose me moment?
Speaker 13 (32:57):
Oh, that's a great one. Oh my last she use
me moment?
Speaker 4 (33:02):
Oh it was this morning.
Speaker 13 (33:04):
So yesterday I had a very early morning and I
had a very intimidating thing that I had to face
and it took a lot of I actually that shy
kid and me showed up yesterday and I had to
deal with her and do this event that I wasn't
prepared for.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Proud of me.
Speaker 13 (33:22):
So this morning, when it was time to wake up
and get my son ready for school, I fought mom
guilt as if one morning of not getting him ready
versus his dad was going to somehow change the trajectory
of his entire life. And I laid in bed and
I did it. Get up and I let my husband
warm the carrot muffin, And not that he wouldn't, but
(33:45):
sometimes even when he's willing to will when he does
do it. And he does it every morning with me.
But I feel guilty if I don't not out there,
like if I'm not you know.
Speaker 7 (33:55):
Give me the kids, you know.
Speaker 13 (33:56):
And I was like, my kid knows he loves me
and I love him, and I'm going to stay in
this bid.
Speaker 11 (34:03):
Have a good day, kiddout.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
Oh my god, that's a good one. Just stay in bed,
Bill Rosenthal, what was your last I Choose me moment?
Speaker 15 (34:16):
Oh?
Speaker 7 (34:17):
I guess right before I got on with you, which
is a very good I choose me moment. Talk to you.
Speaker 9 (34:24):
Uh, I was on the elliptical for a half hour.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
That great, Right, So.
Speaker 15 (34:31):
Not only do I do weights in the morning, but
I find another spot if I want to watch TV.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Don't just sit there, get get up and move a
little bit. Make you do feel better? Yeah, move, move,
move a little yeah. Yeah. Holly Madison, what was your
last I choose me moment?
Speaker 15 (34:51):
This is just so simple and silly, but I just
have to choose to enjoy life because I'm really achievement oriented,
and I tend to throughout my life go through different
phases of like having anxiety of not having achieved enough,
or I'm not on track or I haven't done this yet.
And every day like I'm looking at it right now
because I'm sitting in front of my window, like I
(35:12):
love my backyard. It's so pretty, and every day almost
I take a picture of it and I post up
my Instagram story and I'm like, it's a perfect day.
And I just remind myself to like choose to love
life every day because you could have the most amazing life,
which I feel like I do, and still fall into
this weird funk where you feel like you don't have enough,
you're not achieving enough, and no, no, you just have
(35:33):
to choose to love life.
Speaker 11 (35:36):
So that's mine.
Speaker 1 (35:36):
I Choose Me moment, and there you have it. Happy
Holidays from I Choose Me. We love you. Thank you
for being here and for listening, and especially for choosing
yourself with me.
Hosts And Creators
Tori Spelling
Jennie Garth
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