September 2, 2025 • 33 mins
Today on Golden Hour we're getting into more of your questions! We kick things off getting into the question of the day: have you ever seen someone ruin a relationship solely from how they handled a situation? Then, we get into your questions! This week, our fans are flirting with bosses for revenge and getting all the laughs in the group chat - but at what cost? We're dishing out advice all about relationship damage control and jokes that rub your friends the wrong way. Plus, we end things off with another Golden Spotlight: retirement! Tune in now to hear all this and more and be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks so
much for joining us again. We're so excited to be back.
How are you, Kathy.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
I am fabulous. I am sitting cooling my heroes on vacasion,
loving the cool weather. But today we are going to
be answering more of your fan questions. Make sure you're
submitting them. We love reading them. Just go to Bachelor
nation dot com slash Golden Hour and submit away.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Send us everything, your questions, your updates, and your opinions.
We want all of it. And you can also dm
us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Okay, so before we get into the episode, we're going
to start with the question of the day. But can
I just say to you my favorite part? But I
just want to say, you know, I'm on vacation, I'm
in Canada. Do you just love the cool weather even
in summer?
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Yes, till September. It gets real cool at night and
then the mornings are chilly and then it's really nice
all day.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I mean, this is such a tree for me because
I'm wearing sweaters and long pants in Texas, Like I
won't get with like this till like November.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
But so lucky because when I was in Canada last
year it was one hundred and five.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Well, you know, stay away from Canada. You're ruining this country,
all right. And by the way, I'll bring you some
maple syrup because I know you like to kick it.
All right, Here we go a question of the day.
Have you ever seen someone ruin a friendship or a
relationship just by how they handled something? What do you think?
Speaker 1 (01:46):
It's hard for me to remember, but yes, people do
stupid things.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
I mean I have I haven't personally done this, but
I have seen people let their mouth run away with
them and they'll say something that really offends the other person.
And I'm watching this squad, really did you just say that? Right?
Speaker 1 (02:12):
And they regretted after all, some regot it afterwards.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
But yeah, I mean, I think I think it's unfortunate though,
I mean, I think sometimes, you know, your mouth gets
away with you.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
You were you ever in a situation where two of
your friends and one of them was being a dick
to the other one, and you're trying not to pass judgment,
I open my big mouth. It's none of my business.
But I was in the same car and I'm like, yo,
don't talk to him like that.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Wait, and then did their friendship deteriorate?
Speaker 1 (02:44):
No, they're married, But no, I've.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Had I mean, look at look at Teresa me. I
told her to zip it and how long did it take? Yeah?
I mean, but how long did it take? Right? It's
I think people sometimes don't think. And again we're older,
so we think First's.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Something I learned in my golden years.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
We think first before we speak, and so I will
say I've been guilty. This I have been guilty of.
I don't think it's ever ruined or relationship, but I
have been guilty of saying something. My sister will often
say to me, Kathy, you are an English major. You're
a wordsmith. Beise with no no, no, no, not grammar. Be
(03:29):
precise with your words so that you mean what you say,
and you say what you mean. Sometimes I will say
something and it's like, well, I didn't mean it that way.
So I think sometimes people have to remember that what
you say, what comes out of your mouth is what.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
People hear, hand in hand with the delivery. That's right
to soften things up. Even though you're saying something that's
not a positive thing, but the way you say it,
people can accept it a little easier sometimes, but if
you say it like harshly, it's an immediate defense.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
You and I just talked about this. I met a
woman recently in Bachelor World who reminded me of me
and her delivery. I was like, wow, it was like
holding a mirror up and because I liked her a lot,
I liked her a lot, but I could see where
what she was saying was right. There was you know
(04:29):
so so, but I've never lost a friendship over it.
Then I'm aware of I've never lost a relationship today.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
When I said earlier about the recap on Bachelor in Paradise,
how I related to Parisa, and I'm so glad that
I saw it because I used to be a lot
like that, Like pullback, Susan, don't give it all because
it could be a turn off. It's smothering.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Oh a minute, well, we don't have time to get
back into that today. But I thought you were saying
earlier that you thought it was great that Parisa complimented him.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
I did because I used to do the same things,
smother them with good, good, good, good good. And then
you know so basically what that means is it's all
about to chase with men, and if you're too available?
Speaker 2 (05:16):
So now whoa we just changed the question of the day.
We did. We're going to talk about this. You're telling
me if you're too available, the relationship isn't going to
work out.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
A lot of times, like they enjoyed the chase, when
you're and I'm not good at it, when you're playing
a little hard to get if you will? You know
the books that says be busy when they call. What
do you mean I'm not busy? I want to go
out with them?
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Would I do that? Susan's like, wait a minute, I
need ten minutes to put on my eyeliner. I'll be
right there.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Do you ever do that? Did you ever say you
were busy?
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You think I play games?
Speaker 1 (05:58):
I forgot she didn't they she got married and went
to Berlin. No, not Scotland, Scotland. Okay, with Susan, we
have a little test here. Berlin is in what country?
Berlin is Teresa, Scotland is Kathy. And we just had
a tiny little bit of a technical difficulty that I
had to take a picture of your face that was frozen.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Kathy was adorable. And with that being said, we're going
to give a questions. All right, we'll get into our
fan questions for today. I'm going to start us off
with the first one. You ready, ready, Hey, ladies, I think.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
I messed up and I need some help. I was
at my boyfriend's company party this past Friday. It was
fun at first until I looked over and saw my
boyfriend chatting with one of his coworkers let's call her Mia.
To me, their conversation seemed super flirty, and it was
(06:57):
really pissing me off. He has a tendency to be
a social butterfly and bounce around the room while I'm
feeling awkward. I don't usually clam up in social situations,
but being around your partner's coworkers that you don't know
is really intimidating. When I went over to grab him,
he said, one sec I'm telling Mia about X, Y
(07:21):
and Z. I was really annoyed and in the moment
felt like he was picking her over me all and
my jealousy got the best of me. So I started
passively flirting with his boss. Nothing inappropriate, just being a
little flirty and friendly. Well, apparently, one of my boyfriend's
(07:41):
work friends noticed and asked him if I was cool.
With that, he politely asked if we could head home
because he was tired. I thought nothing of it, so
I said sure and we said our goodbyes. The car
ride home was completely silent. He told me he needed
some space and was really hurt and embarrassed. How do
(08:02):
I fix this? Was I really in the wrong for
what I did? I'm really confused right now? Thanks, ladies?
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Can I go first? Helly, Yeah, you were really wrong.
You don't never flirt with the boss. I don't care
if it's your boss, your boyfriend's boss, your sister's boss,
your grandmother's boss. You do not work with the.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
Boss a jealousy will do?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Oh? Come on? First time?
Speaker 1 (08:28):
I couldn't she, Kathy? Why couldn't she? When he said,
wait just one second, I'm telling her about X, Y
and Z, chime right in and be a part of it.
Oh my gosh, Yes, wait to hear this part like
and be a part of that conversation instead of feeling insecure.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Well, so let me just tell you, you and I
Shocker are both outgoing. We can walk into it's one
of my strongest suits, and I know it's one of yours.
We can walk into a cocktail party with no one
we know and leave with one hundred best friends because
you and I can enter. We have that capo. My
husband was the guy who would stand around while I
(09:04):
was talking and then get angry with me that I
didn't stand by his side because he was not outgoing.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
But so, did you ever feel like he left you
to talk to somebody?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
I would know, but he felt that I left him
to talk to people, and he would get very angry.
Now it wasn't flirting. I was just having conversations. Here's
where you went wrong, Anonymous. Your boyfriend your Susan's right,
Your jealousy got in the way. Your boyfriend is your boyfriend.
If you don't have the faith and the trust in
(09:35):
your relationship, and you see a red flag because he's
chit chatting with a workmate who happens to.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Be sounds like that's his personality.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Like she said, I'm saying, if that is your worry
that you cannot trust your boyfriend because he's chatting with
a girl a workmate, you have bigger issues in your relationship.
That's what I think you need to get at the
heart of why you don't trust your boyfriend. That's what
I would say.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
What do you think the only way out of it,
and it's not even out of it, is tell the truth.
Just say I was a little jealous. I saw you.
To me, it looked like you were flirting with me,
and I felt uncomfortable. So I decided to do this.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
So I decided to flirt with your boss. Well, I
got to tell you his name. The roles were reversed.
I'd have to rethink that relationship. I hate to sound harsh,
but if I were digging a guy and he started
flirting with my boss, I don't want that, would you?
I mean, I wouldn't want to do it.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I understood where she was coming from about he leaves
her at his work party. But of course you're going
to his people.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
So chat. Go find some of the chat with don't
hit on his boss. You got a room full of people, friend.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
She did, though she said, you don't care, I don't care.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
The point here is she thought it was flirting.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Beg forgiveness. But now I can't let go of the
fact that how it was making her feel that he
didn't have the decency to include her in a conversation
with Mia.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:14):
She's standing there by herself. She don't know these people,
and we talked.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
No, I'm sorry you and I shocker are going to disagree.
Yet again, you are not talking about a ten year old.
We are talking about adults who are in adult relationships.
If your boyfriend is talking with someone else, be it
male or female, you know what you do. Strike up
a conversation with the guy or gown next to you,
(11:41):
find something to talk about the cumulus clouds overhead, find
something to be He has not gab like you, though, Well,
she had the gift to gab with his boss.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I think she should have stayed in the conversation with
the X, Y and Z with Mia. That's what my
butt would be if I thought he was flirting with her.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Be right, So great answer. Hang out with Mia and
your boyfriend in chit chat, or talk to the male
or female next to you about what color socks the
waiter has on there with the boss. Do not, ever,
it is an axiom of life. Never forgot the thing
(12:23):
to do. So I'm sorry that your boyfriends need space.
I don't blame her. Do I sound harsh? My delivery harsh?
Isn't if I felt? Yes?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
But she was wrong for doing that with the boss.
I get it, because he didn't even notice. Somebody had
to tell him. That's the best part. Maybe he isn't
the one for you. Oh, she said, share with him.
Do you share with him that you felt uncomfortable that
he was flirting. It seemed like he was flirting. That
didn't give you the right to do what you did.
You admit fault. However, if you feel that way, then
(12:57):
go be a part of it. And you still feel
uncomfort rippled and freaking leave.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Yeah, I'm just saying, in the future, do anything, Anonymous,
anything but go hang up the lady's room. Do anything,
pick dust off the carpet, you know, ask him there's
a vacuum cleaner because you want to vacuum the drapes.
Do anything, but do not flirt with your boyfriend's boss.
(13:33):
All Right, We're moving on now that I've tortured her,
and I'm really sorry, and I hope, I hope you
guys get back together, Anonymous, but I really would encourage
you to look in the mirror and evaluate why you
don't trust your boyfriend, because that's really what is a
part of this. It's really not funny, Kathy. It brings
to mind Frederick is very friendly, and we're all French people.
(13:55):
Nobody speak in my language, and he writes everybody and
everybody loves them and write a little weird a couple
of times. Not that I thought he was flirting, but
just like, hey, I'm over here, and I did I
tried to strike up a conversation and can't speak the language.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
So what do you do then?
Speaker 2 (14:14):
I mean, listen, when in doubt, go to the bar
and get a drink, or your case, go to one
of the boutiques and go buy yourself something. Let's move
on along, moving wrong on the next one. Hi, Kathy
and Susan. I need to know if I'm the bad
guy here the other day. What can I just say
(14:35):
before we get to this question When people write in
and say, I need to know if I'm in the wrong,
I need to know if I'm the bad guy. I
need to know if I made a mistake. The rule
of thumb is if you think you did, you probably did.
Let's just say you know. Let's just cut it there, Okay,
(14:55):
I need to know if I'm the bad guy here
the other day? I poked fun there you go at
my friend Lilah in our group Chap She's always sending
us updates about her really shitty first dates, usually live texting,
and all in good fun. So yesterday, when she said, ugh,
another one bites the dust, I replied, Sis, I'm starting
(15:20):
to think it's you crying emoji. Everyone in the group
chap laughed, reacted to it, and we all quickly followed
up with questions and jokes as usual. Well, she didn't
respond after I sent that and left the group chat
at the end of the night. When I texted her
after she left the chat to see if she was
upset with me, she didn't answer. It's been almost two
(15:44):
days and I still haven't heard from her. What should
I do? My friends are all staying out of bit
but reassured me that it wasn't a big deal and
to just give her time to cool off. I'm honestly
really annoyed with her. Am I justified in feeling that way?
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Thanks, ladies, Yes, you are justified, because if she does
this repeatedly and you're joking and saying maybe it's you,
maybe there's nothing wrong with that. That was funny. Kathy's
face is telling me different.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, I'm like kind of stunned that you said that.
I think what if it had been me. I you know,
I don't like texting because there's no emotion in texting.
You can't read the emojis, right, you don't. That's the
problem texting. But had I done that and said something
like maybe it's you, maybe she feels like there is
(16:37):
something wrong with her. So what I would have done
later is I would have texted Lyla said hey girlfriend
or him, you know, hey, friend, I was kidding. I
didn't mean it. I hope you didn't take a sense
at it. No, no, no, he said that. She left
(16:57):
the group chat and yels she texted her, and she
left the chat to see if she was upset. She
didn't answer, it's been two days. She left the chat
to see she texted.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Her in the group.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
I wouldn't. I wouldn't have texted to see if she
was upset. I would have said, hey, I'm really sorry.
I don't think it's you. I don't you know. I
didn't mean to offend you.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
Maybe I was just teasing.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
I was teasing, and I'm sorry. I understand you probably
didn't find it funny.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
You know, I don't think it was funny. I was
just busting them a little bit.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Yeah, and I'm sorry and I won't do it again.
But the fact that a girl not to join back
in the text for two days over that, well, maybe
that's why the dates are bad. I'm saying, maybe she
feels badly, Maybe she feels like there is something wrong
with her and that's why things started her feeling Another
(17:56):
one bit that maybe she's feeling but it sounds like
she can put it out there.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Another one bites it does. Oh, but she can't take it,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (18:06):
Maybe that's the case, Susan. Maybe she can't take it. Oh,
look at you really take it? Can't take it on
crying in a corner. What are you going to do?
Speaker 1 (18:19):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
I said? Now I can't take it. I'm crying in
a corner. You're going to say, see a land.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
When you buy your hair and say, snap the freak
out of it. Cat, let's go.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
I'll get you a pizza and I will drink the
tequila and Susan will have two slices of pizza. I
don't know. I don't think this person has the whoever
it is, I don't think. I don't think this person
els the right to be annoyed.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
I think she's asking us, Am I in the wrong?
Is that how she started this one?
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Yeah? I think you're in the wrong. Not for what
you did. I think you're in the wrong for not
reaching back out and again, and let's talk about it.
Let's talk about your friendship has valued to me. I
care about you, I love you. Let's not let this
come between us. Come on, let's talk then, Anonymous, I
(19:13):
would say, if you make an honest effort to talk
with her, get it out in the open, what's really
bothered her and she still doesn't talk to you, then
that's her problem, not yours. But right now, I think
you owe it. Do you agree to it.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
I wouldn't want to hurt anybody's feelings, and I don't
think she was intending to hurt her feelings because this
is no. I don't even there every time and she
just everybody laughs.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
But some people are sensitive, Susan, especially if she's always getting.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Consensitive when she goes another one bites the dust. That's
not being real sensitive.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
No, that she said about herself. I know, I know,
but maybe she's sensitive that guys break up with her.
Who knows.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
No, she's saying the date sucks. She said she can't.
Always sends updates about her really shitty first dates, usually
live texting, and all in good fun. So yesterday she says,
another one bites the dust. Yes, but Susan, your way,
(20:18):
you crying emoji?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
That's funny. It is funny. But here's the thing. If
you know, you and I make jokes all the time,
but sometimes people make jokes when they're really hurting inside.
And maybe she's hurting. So I'm just saying, maybe she's
hurting that none of these dates ever go well. And
if it were me, I would be thinking what's wrong
(20:40):
with me? So for someone to voice that, I could
see what she would feel bad. So I would try
it again. Long and short of this is before we
move on, I would try again to reach out to her, apologize,
make sure she understands how she is valuable to you,
you value your friendship with her, and try to make amend.
And like Susan said, if she's still then that's her problem.
(21:02):
You got to move on and let her cool off.
All right, are you ready? But you are going to
do a Golden spotlight suasan where we talk about something
that impacts the Golden community. Okay, today we're talking about
my favorite topic, retirement. Okay, so I want the things
I want to talk about. I'm interested in other people's opinion.
(21:26):
You know, I am retired, you're not really retired yet.
But I don't want to day a guy who's not retired,
because then he can't travel. He's limited to two or
three weeks. Here. Look what Joan and Chalk are going through.
She's retired. I mean, she's doing stuff the Bachelor, but
she doesn't have a full time job. Chalk does not choice,
(21:49):
though I don't care. It's by choice. He's not retired,
she is. I am retired. I don't want a data
guy who's not retired. How do you feel about that?
That is a big issue.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
I think a guy that's not retired and I have
more free time than he, I mean than Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
But you're not really retired either, so you guys balance
the balance though.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I guess so now that would suck because you have
to wait for him to be able to.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
And for me, when I retired, I did have a
bit of an adjustment. You know, I didn't have the
rigid structure of the schedule anymore. I could kind of
do what I want when I want, and so when
guys have asked me out. I've had some guys in
their fifties and early sixties asked me out. I don't
really want to do it. Remember that guy we met
(22:38):
in California at the hotel. The guy was fifty eight. Yes,
and he was really interested in me. And I said, yeah,
but you work full time. He goes, we can make
it work. He by coastal and he works full time.
I mean, what do you think.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
I think just adjusting to retirement. Like I over the
years had many many clients that one was retiring but
the other one wasn't. And that adjustment. You know that
he's home all the time and she's like, oh my gosh,
you know he needs a hobby or whatever. It is
an adjustment. And if you don't plan on what activities
(23:14):
or what you want to do, Yeah, you just got
to think about it as it comes. Yeah, I do
prepare for that.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
You have to. It's like dating again almost. It's like
res kindling her friendship, a relationships.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Definitely give him more chores since he was the one
at home and I'm still worship.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
With Susan hamming down here with a mop and sponge
on the kitchen.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Clean the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Okay, so there's though, there are those things, the adjustment
of time, like everyone has more time when you're retired dating.
You know, I just said I want to date someone
who's retired. What about I hit the elephant in the room,
the nancys when you're.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Retired and you didn't prepare well.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
Some people don't prepare well. But again it's you have
the time and you want to balance the resources. Like
do you think goldens, I don't know. Do you think
goldens spend enough time thinking about what retirement's going to be,
like can to finance what they want to do?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
Well? Goldens are in that you think younger people. I
think younger people should focus more on what it's going
to be to retire and start saving. Now I did
it backwards and right, gret it because I always thought, oh,
he's making a ton of money. I don't have to worry, right,
I thought we were going to get a divorce, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Right? But but I mean I'm not saying my question right.
Let's try this again. When when goldens when we're retired,
Now we're golden, whether you're sixty, whatever it is, we're retired.
I think that goldens. I've dated some guys who are like, hey,
I'm retired, I can do anything I want. Come to
(25:02):
find out they can't because we're living longer. And I
don't think goldens think enough about once they're retired.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Do you mean financially like they did.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
I think that's one of the things that I've known, this.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
Golden somebody from traveling like crazy or spending money. They
have to be on a budget because they know what's
left and how they have to live.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
But I'm saying I have met a lot of goldens
who don't get any thought. It's not I'm not talking
about what I agree with what you're saying. Young people
need to think back, you know, think hey, I'm going
to be retired someday. I'm talking about the people I've
met who are retired, who are spending like it's Christmas
every day and they're like, yeah, I'll worry about that later.
(25:44):
I'm like, I don't think they've figured out that we're
living longer, we're healthier. I find that amazing. You haven't
come across.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
One of the things that I've always said to people,
everybody back back when this is our parents and our grandparents,
and they would not they would do with that, They
wouldn't go on trips because they were saving it to
their golden years. I totally disagree with that. I think,
go while you're healthy and young, and you work for it,
and you go and take your holiday, and then you
(26:17):
pay for it and you save up for the next
time when it's finally retirement. A lot of times Kathy
who needs a knee replacement, who I know, my dad,
bless him. He retired. A week later, he got a
knee replacement, and six weeks later he passed, so he
never got to enjoy his retirement. So it just happens.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
But that's what I'm saying. Retirement looks so different today.
People who are retired still want to Some people who
are retired want to volunteer full time because they want
things to do. I will be honest with you. Most
of my friends, in fact, I would say ninety five
(27:00):
percent of my friends are not retired. They're between age
forty and sixty.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
And that's frustrating for us because we want to go
do things and they can't because they're still working or rightet.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
But and so I find that I find having as
much energy as I have as much time as I
have and the desire to do things. I think sometimes
people think retirement is going to be this opportunity to
do everything you want to do. But you know what,
I find I have to find people to do it
with me. And it's like a whole new set of
(27:36):
friends sometimes because you got to find people who can
do those things with you. And I think retirement is
not I mean, in my parents' generation, our parents do
live length that we're living our grandparents right.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Right right, And everybody's different, like they're not healthy enough
to go enjoy things, like they can't do it because
their health has been altered somehow.
Speaker 2 (27:59):
Yeah. I think my advice to Golden is not that
anyone's asking me today, but hey, what the hell? I
think Golden should spend more time concerned about their health
so that they can live active years. You know.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Can I say something else, Kathy, something that I didn't realize. Okay,
some people live on Medicare and they take.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
It no no, no, you mean social Security.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Social Security and they take out for Medicare and they
take out for this, and then they own a home,
they have to pay taxes. There's nothing left for them.
And and I don't think people think about that. You
don't realize That's.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
What I'm saying. I think, I think, I think you
and I are doing a free advertisement for AIRP today sign.
But I do think that. I do think that retirement
looks very different today and that and I think that's
a good thing. But I will say I have had
some challenges finding people active, in to date, finding girlfriends
(29:03):
who can afford to travel or even want to travel.
Retirement looks very different in twenty twenty five than it did.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Our kids and our grandkids that are learning. You know,
I can't tell them enough, put them away, put away
for a ranger. Yeah, I'm telling you. I'm not telling
you do you have it?
Speaker 2 (29:22):
But do you tell your kids? Because I know we
have young grandchildren. I tell my kids all the time.
First of all, you know you and I travel a lot.
We're doing different things, and our kids are like, wait
a minute, we need you to babysit. Yeah, sorry, I
won't be home. But I always say to my kids
how energetic we are. Do you think our kids appreciate
(29:45):
how much energy we have in our retirement.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (29:48):
I do.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
My kids just worry about me spending their inheritance.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Well, that you know what that is Actually another question
for retirement. Do you do you think we should be
saving for to give money to our kids and should
we be spending every time in our retirement.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
Well, nobody spends every dime. But yes, you're hoping something's
left for them. But I'm not going to go with
al because I want to leave more. You're not not selfish.
I worked all my life, you know, so you with
them though, I like to go with them on vacation,
Like I just came back from the Outer Banks with
my son Christopher's family and a bunch of other people.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
So yeah, I brought my own family to Canada. Yes,
I that, But in retirement again, it's very different. My
retirement is very different from my parents when they retired.
But but that is another thing I want when you
talk about dating and retirement, I know you you have Frederick,
but I still talk about in retirement. I want someone
(30:51):
who wants who were family is important. I love spending
time with my family in retirement. I think, to me,
it's almost a red flag if I go out on
a date with a guy and he's like my kids,
that's their problem, you know. I'm I'm here to have fun,
do you. I'm that's a red flat for me, because
retirement is about.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
Having They wish I was around even more because.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
My kids you too. I don't know. I just think that,
you know, people talk about being invisible once they retire,
once they hurt sixty, being invisible. I just think retirement
today looks very different. Words active, We travel, we do things,
and I love that. And I hope all the people
out there who are listening today who are retired, to
(31:35):
realize that the misconceptions that you know you're retired, you
crow up on a sofa and read a book and
go to sleep. I hope people realize that that is
not what retirement is anymore.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
Still still being alive and enjoying your life and your families.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
You know, get now in life. I mean I want
retirement for me. Well, first of all, I plan on
living another account and tell my kids at thirty.
Speaker 1 (32:00):
More years, oh I'll be long gone. Cat, I'll save
you a spot. And that was fun.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
You're leaving me, Susan.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Yes, today for you, but everybody, let us know what
you thought about this conversation and where you're at in life.
You know, my retirement, you are retired, Some not those
of you that haven't looked into retirement savings.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Get busy.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
That is Susan's because thank you so much for joining
us today.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
Yeah, it's really great. I think I think these topics
are all interesting and we hope that you know we
gave you something to chew on, something to think about today. Yes,
but in the meantime, be sure to follow us. That's
our happy Hour because we have new episodes coming out
every week. You don't want to miss it this week
of retirement. Next week we're having a whole episode about dating.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Twenty year olds or I don't know, you never know.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
What interests sex with twenty year olds.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Listen in and make sure to submit your questions to us.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
And you know how to do that.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Just go to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or
dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio
app or wherever you listen to podcasts. Until next time,
have a great week.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
Jaff
Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks so
much for joining us again. We're so excited to be back.
How are you, Kathy.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
I am fabulous. I am sitting cooling my heroes on vacasion,
loving the cool weather. But today we are going to
be answering more of your fan questions. Make sure you're
submitting them. We love reading them. Just go to Bachelor
nation dot com slash Golden Hour and submit away.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Send us everything, your questions, your updates, and your opinions.
We want all of it. And you can also dm
us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Okay, so before we get into the episode, we're going
to start with the question of the day. But can
I just say to you my favorite part? But I
just want to say, you know, I'm on vacation, I'm
in Canada. Do you just love the cool weather even
in summer?
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Yes, till September. It gets real cool at night and
then the mornings are chilly and then it's really nice
all day.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I mean, this is such a tree for me because
I'm wearing sweaters and long pants in Texas, Like I
won't get with like this till like November.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
But so lucky because when I was in Canada last
year it was one hundred and five.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Well, you know, stay away from Canada. You're ruining this country,
all right. And by the way, I'll bring you some
maple syrup because I know you like to kick it.
All right, Here we go a question of the day.
Have you ever seen someone ruin a friendship or a
relationship just by how they handled something? What do you think?
Speaker 1 (01:46):
It's hard for me to remember, but yes, people do
stupid things.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
I mean I have I haven't personally done this, but
I have seen people let their mouth run away with
them and they'll say something that really offends the other person.
And I'm watching this squad, really did you just say that? Right?
Speaker 1 (02:12):
And they regretted after all, some regot it afterwards.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
But yeah, I mean, I think I think it's unfortunate though,
I mean, I think sometimes, you know, your mouth gets
away with you.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
You were you ever in a situation where two of
your friends and one of them was being a dick
to the other one, and you're trying not to pass judgment,
I open my big mouth. It's none of my business.
But I was in the same car and I'm like, yo,
don't talk to him like that.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Wait, and then did their friendship deteriorate?
Speaker 1 (02:44):
No, they're married, But no, I've.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Had I mean, look at look at Teresa me. I
told her to zip it and how long did it take? Yeah?
I mean, but how long did it take? Right? It's
I think people sometimes don't think. And again we're older,
so we think First's.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Something I learned in my golden years.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
We think first before we speak, and so I will
say I've been guilty. This I have been guilty of.
I don't think it's ever ruined or relationship, but I
have been guilty of saying something. My sister will often
say to me, Kathy, you are an English major. You're
a wordsmith. Beise with no no, no, no, not grammar. Be
(03:29):
precise with your words so that you mean what you say,
and you say what you mean. Sometimes I will say
something and it's like, well, I didn't mean it that way.
So I think sometimes people have to remember that what
you say, what comes out of your mouth is what.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
People hear, hand in hand with the delivery. That's right
to soften things up. Even though you're saying something that's
not a positive thing, but the way you say it,
people can accept it a little easier sometimes, but if
you say it like harshly, it's an immediate defense.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
You and I just talked about this. I met a
woman recently in Bachelor World who reminded me of me
and her delivery. I was like, wow, it was like
holding a mirror up and because I liked her a lot,
I liked her a lot, but I could see where
what she was saying was right. There was you know
(04:29):
so so, but I've never lost a friendship over it.
Then I'm aware of I've never lost a relationship today.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
When I said earlier about the recap on Bachelor in Paradise,
how I related to Parisa, and I'm so glad that
I saw it because I used to be a lot
like that, Like pullback, Susan, don't give it all because
it could be a turn off. It's smothering.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Oh a minute, well, we don't have time to get
back into that today. But I thought you were saying
earlier that you thought it was great that Parisa complimented him.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
I did because I used to do the same things,
smother them with good, good, good, good good. And then
you know so basically what that means is it's all
about to chase with men, and if you're too available?
Speaker 2 (05:16):
So now whoa we just changed the question of the day.
We did. We're going to talk about this. You're telling
me if you're too available, the relationship isn't going to
work out.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
A lot of times, like they enjoyed the chase, when
you're and I'm not good at it, when you're playing
a little hard to get if you will? You know
the books that says be busy when they call. What
do you mean I'm not busy? I want to go
out with them?
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Would I do that? Susan's like, wait a minute, I
need ten minutes to put on my eyeliner. I'll be
right there.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Do you ever do that? Did you ever say you
were busy?
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You think I play games?
Speaker 1 (05:58):
I forgot she didn't they she got married and went
to Berlin. No, not Scotland, Scotland. Okay, with Susan, we
have a little test here. Berlin is in what country?
Berlin is Teresa, Scotland is Kathy. And we just had
a tiny little bit of a technical difficulty that I
had to take a picture of your face that was frozen.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Kathy was adorable. And with that being said, we're going
to give a questions. All right, we'll get into our
fan questions for today. I'm going to start us off
with the first one. You ready, ready, Hey, ladies, I think.
Speaker 1 (06:36):
I messed up and I need some help. I was
at my boyfriend's company party this past Friday. It was
fun at first until I looked over and saw my
boyfriend chatting with one of his coworkers let's call her Mia.
To me, their conversation seemed super flirty, and it was
(06:57):
really pissing me off. He has a tendency to be
a social butterfly and bounce around the room while I'm
feeling awkward. I don't usually clam up in social situations,
but being around your partner's coworkers that you don't know
is really intimidating. When I went over to grab him,
he said, one sec I'm telling Mia about X, Y
(07:21):
and Z. I was really annoyed and in the moment
felt like he was picking her over me all and
my jealousy got the best of me. So I started
passively flirting with his boss. Nothing inappropriate, just being a
little flirty and friendly. Well, apparently, one of my boyfriend's
(07:41):
work friends noticed and asked him if I was cool.
With that, he politely asked if we could head home
because he was tired. I thought nothing of it, so
I said sure and we said our goodbyes. The car
ride home was completely silent. He told me he needed
some space and was really hurt and embarrassed. How do
(08:02):
I fix this? Was I really in the wrong for
what I did? I'm really confused right now? Thanks, ladies?
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Can I go first? Helly, Yeah, you were really wrong.
You don't never flirt with the boss. I don't care
if it's your boss, your boyfriend's boss, your sister's boss,
your grandmother's boss. You do not work with the.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
Boss a jealousy will do?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Oh? Come on? First time?
Speaker 1 (08:28):
I couldn't she, Kathy? Why couldn't she? When he said,
wait just one second, I'm telling her about X, Y
and Z, chime right in and be a part of it.
Oh my gosh, Yes, wait to hear this part like
and be a part of that conversation instead of feeling insecure.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Well, so let me just tell you, you and I
Shocker are both outgoing. We can walk into it's one
of my strongest suits, and I know it's one of yours.
We can walk into a cocktail party with no one
we know and leave with one hundred best friends because
you and I can enter. We have that capo. My
husband was the guy who would stand around while I
(09:04):
was talking and then get angry with me that I
didn't stand by his side because he was not outgoing.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
But so, did you ever feel like he left you
to talk to somebody?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
I would know, but he felt that I left him
to talk to people, and he would get very angry.
Now it wasn't flirting. I was just having conversations. Here's
where you went wrong, Anonymous. Your boyfriend your Susan's right,
Your jealousy got in the way. Your boyfriend is your boyfriend.
If you don't have the faith and the trust in
(09:35):
your relationship, and you see a red flag because he's
chit chatting with a workmate who happens to.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Be sounds like that's his personality.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Like she said, I'm saying, if that is your worry
that you cannot trust your boyfriend because he's chatting with
a girl a workmate, you have bigger issues in your relationship.
That's what I think you need to get at the
heart of why you don't trust your boyfriend. That's what
I would say.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
What do you think the only way out of it,
and it's not even out of it, is tell the truth.
Just say I was a little jealous. I saw you.
To me, it looked like you were flirting with me,
and I felt uncomfortable. So I decided to do this.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
So I decided to flirt with your boss. Well, I
got to tell you his name. The roles were reversed.
I'd have to rethink that relationship. I hate to sound harsh,
but if I were digging a guy and he started
flirting with my boss, I don't want that, would you?
I mean, I wouldn't want to do it.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I understood where she was coming from about he leaves
her at his work party. But of course you're going
to his people.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
So chat. Go find some of the chat with don't
hit on his boss. You got a room full of people, friend.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
She did, though she said, you don't care, I don't care.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
The point here is she thought it was flirting.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Beg forgiveness. But now I can't let go of the
fact that how it was making her feel that he
didn't have the decency to include her in a conversation
with Mia.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:14):
She's standing there by herself. She don't know these people,
and we talked.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
No, I'm sorry you and I shocker are going to disagree.
Yet again, you are not talking about a ten year old.
We are talking about adults who are in adult relationships.
If your boyfriend is talking with someone else, be it
male or female, you know what you do. Strike up
a conversation with the guy or gown next to you,
(11:41):
find something to talk about the cumulus clouds overhead, find
something to be He has not gab like you, though, Well,
she had the gift to gab with his boss.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I think she should have stayed in the conversation with
the X, Y and Z with Mia. That's what my
butt would be if I thought he was flirting with her.
Speaker 2 (12:00):
Be right, So great answer. Hang out with Mia and
your boyfriend in chit chat, or talk to the male
or female next to you about what color socks the
waiter has on there with the boss. Do not, ever,
it is an axiom of life. Never forgot the thing
(12:23):
to do. So I'm sorry that your boyfriends need space.
I don't blame her. Do I sound harsh? My delivery harsh?
Isn't if I felt? Yes?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
But she was wrong for doing that with the boss.
I get it, because he didn't even notice. Somebody had
to tell him. That's the best part. Maybe he isn't
the one for you. Oh, she said, share with him.
Do you share with him that you felt uncomfortable that
he was flirting. It seemed like he was flirting. That
didn't give you the right to do what you did.
You admit fault. However, if you feel that way, then
(12:57):
go be a part of it. And you still feel
uncomfort rippled and freaking leave.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Yeah, I'm just saying, in the future, do anything, Anonymous,
anything but go hang up the lady's room. Do anything,
pick dust off the carpet, you know, ask him there's
a vacuum cleaner because you want to vacuum the drapes.
Do anything, but do not flirt with your boyfriend's boss.
(13:33):
All Right, We're moving on now that I've tortured her,
and I'm really sorry, and I hope, I hope you
guys get back together, Anonymous, but I really would encourage
you to look in the mirror and evaluate why you
don't trust your boyfriend, because that's really what is a
part of this. It's really not funny, Kathy. It brings
to mind Frederick is very friendly, and we're all French people.
(13:55):
Nobody speak in my language, and he writes everybody and
everybody loves them and write a little weird a couple
of times. Not that I thought he was flirting, but
just like, hey, I'm over here, and I did I
tried to strike up a conversation and can't speak the language.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
So what do you do then?
Speaker 2 (14:14):
I mean, listen, when in doubt, go to the bar
and get a drink, or your case, go to one
of the boutiques and go buy yourself something. Let's move
on along, moving wrong on the next one. Hi, Kathy
and Susan. I need to know if I'm the bad
guy here the other day. What can I just say
(14:35):
before we get to this question When people write in
and say, I need to know if I'm in the wrong,
I need to know if I'm the bad guy. I
need to know if I made a mistake. The rule
of thumb is if you think you did, you probably did.
Let's just say you know. Let's just cut it there, Okay,
(14:55):
I need to know if I'm the bad guy here
the other day? I poked fun there you go at
my friend Lilah in our group Chap She's always sending
us updates about her really shitty first dates, usually live texting,
and all in good fun. So yesterday, when she said, ugh,
another one bites the dust, I replied, Sis, I'm starting
(15:20):
to think it's you crying emoji. Everyone in the group
chap laughed, reacted to it, and we all quickly followed
up with questions and jokes as usual. Well, she didn't
respond after I sent that and left the group chat
at the end of the night. When I texted her
after she left the chat to see if she was
upset with me, she didn't answer. It's been almost two
(15:44):
days and I still haven't heard from her. What should
I do? My friends are all staying out of bit
but reassured me that it wasn't a big deal and
to just give her time to cool off. I'm honestly
really annoyed with her. Am I justified in feeling that way?
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Thanks, ladies, Yes, you are justified, because if she does
this repeatedly and you're joking and saying maybe it's you,
maybe there's nothing wrong with that. That was funny. Kathy's
face is telling me different.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
Yeah, I'm like kind of stunned that you said that.
I think what if it had been me. I you know,
I don't like texting because there's no emotion in texting.
You can't read the emojis, right, you don't. That's the
problem texting. But had I done that and said something
like maybe it's you, maybe she feels like there is
(16:37):
something wrong with her. So what I would have done
later is I would have texted Lyla said hey girlfriend
or him, you know, hey, friend, I was kidding. I
didn't mean it. I hope you didn't take a sense
at it. No, no, no, he said that. She left
(16:57):
the group chat and yels she texted her, and she
left the chat to see if she was upset. She
didn't answer, it's been two days. She left the chat
to see she texted.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Her in the group.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
I wouldn't. I wouldn't have texted to see if she
was upset. I would have said, hey, I'm really sorry.
I don't think it's you. I don't you know. I
didn't mean to offend you.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
Maybe I was just teasing.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
I was teasing, and I'm sorry. I understand you probably
didn't find it funny.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
You know, I don't think it was funny. I was
just busting them a little bit.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Yeah, and I'm sorry and I won't do it again.
But the fact that a girl not to join back
in the text for two days over that, well, maybe
that's why the dates are bad. I'm saying, maybe she
feels badly, Maybe she feels like there is something wrong
with her and that's why things started her feeling Another
(17:56):
one bit that maybe she's feeling but it sounds like
she can put it out there.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Another one bites it does. Oh, but she can't take it,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (18:06):
Maybe that's the case, Susan. Maybe she can't take it. Oh,
look at you really take it? Can't take it on
crying in a corner. What are you going to do?
Speaker 1 (18:19):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (18:20):
I said? Now I can't take it. I'm crying in
a corner. You're going to say, see a land.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
When you buy your hair and say, snap the freak
out of it. Cat, let's go.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
I'll get you a pizza and I will drink the
tequila and Susan will have two slices of pizza. I
don't know. I don't think this person has the whoever
it is, I don't think. I don't think this person
els the right to be annoyed.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
I think she's asking us, Am I in the wrong?
Is that how she started this one?
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Yeah? I think you're in the wrong. Not for what
you did. I think you're in the wrong for not
reaching back out and again, and let's talk about it.
Let's talk about your friendship has valued to me. I
care about you, I love you. Let's not let this
come between us. Come on, let's talk then, Anonymous, I
(19:13):
would say, if you make an honest effort to talk
with her, get it out in the open, what's really
bothered her and she still doesn't talk to you, then
that's her problem, not yours. But right now, I think
you owe it. Do you agree to it.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
I wouldn't want to hurt anybody's feelings, and I don't
think she was intending to hurt her feelings because this
is no. I don't even there every time and she
just everybody laughs.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
But some people are sensitive, Susan, especially if she's always getting.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
Consensitive when she goes another one bites the dust. That's
not being real sensitive.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
No, that she said about herself. I know, I know,
but maybe she's sensitive that guys break up with her.
Who knows.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
No, she's saying the date sucks. She said she can't.
Always sends updates about her really shitty first dates, usually
live texting, and all in good fun. So yesterday she says,
another one bites the dust. Yes, but Susan, your way,
(20:18):
you crying emoji?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
That's funny. It is funny. But here's the thing. If
you know, you and I make jokes all the time,
but sometimes people make jokes when they're really hurting inside.
And maybe she's hurting. So I'm just saying, maybe she's
hurting that none of these dates ever go well. And
if it were me, I would be thinking what's wrong
(20:40):
with me? So for someone to voice that, I could
see what she would feel bad. So I would try
it again. Long and short of this is before we
move on, I would try again to reach out to her, apologize,
make sure she understands how she is valuable to you,
you value your friendship with her, and try to make amend.
And like Susan said, if she's still then that's her problem.
(21:02):
You got to move on and let her cool off.
All right, are you ready? But you are going to
do a Golden spotlight suasan where we talk about something
that impacts the Golden community. Okay, today we're talking about
my favorite topic, retirement. Okay, so I want the things
I want to talk about. I'm interested in other people's opinion.
(21:26):
You know, I am retired, you're not really retired yet.
But I don't want to day a guy who's not retired,
because then he can't travel. He's limited to two or
three weeks. Here. Look what Joan and Chalk are going through.
She's retired. I mean, she's doing stuff the Bachelor, but
she doesn't have a full time job. Chalk does not choice,
(21:49):
though I don't care. It's by choice. He's not retired,
she is. I am retired. I don't want a data
guy who's not retired. How do you feel about that?
That is a big issue.
Speaker 1 (21:59):
I think a guy that's not retired and I have
more free time than he, I mean than Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
But you're not really retired either, so you guys balance
the balance though.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I guess so now that would suck because you have
to wait for him to be able to.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
And for me, when I retired, I did have a
bit of an adjustment. You know, I didn't have the
rigid structure of the schedule anymore. I could kind of
do what I want when I want, and so when
guys have asked me out. I've had some guys in
their fifties and early sixties asked me out. I don't
really want to do it. Remember that guy we met
(22:38):
in California at the hotel. The guy was fifty eight. Yes,
and he was really interested in me. And I said, yeah,
but you work full time. He goes, we can make
it work. He by coastal and he works full time.
I mean, what do you think.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
I think just adjusting to retirement. Like I over the
years had many many clients that one was retiring but
the other one wasn't. And that adjustment. You know that
he's home all the time and she's like, oh my gosh,
you know he needs a hobby or whatever. It is
an adjustment. And if you don't plan on what activities
(23:14):
or what you want to do, Yeah, you just got
to think about it as it comes. Yeah, I do
prepare for that.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
You have to. It's like dating again almost. It's like
res kindling her friendship, a relationships.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Definitely give him more chores since he was the one
at home and I'm still worship.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
With Susan hamming down here with a mop and sponge
on the kitchen.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Clean the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Okay, so there's though, there are those things, the adjustment
of time, like everyone has more time when you're retired dating.
You know, I just said I want to date someone
who's retired. What about I hit the elephant in the room,
the nancys when you're.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Retired and you didn't prepare well.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
Some people don't prepare well. But again it's you have
the time and you want to balance the resources. Like
do you think goldens, I don't know. Do you think
goldens spend enough time thinking about what retirement's going to be,
like can to finance what they want to do?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
Well? Goldens are in that you think younger people. I
think younger people should focus more on what it's going
to be to retire and start saving. Now I did
it backwards and right, gret it because I always thought, oh,
he's making a ton of money. I don't have to worry, right,
I thought we were going to get a divorce, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (24:41):
Right? But but I mean I'm not saying my question right.
Let's try this again. When when goldens when we're retired,
Now we're golden, whether you're sixty, whatever it is, we're retired.
I think that goldens. I've dated some guys who are like, hey,
I'm retired, I can do anything I want. Come to
(25:02):
find out they can't because we're living longer. And I
don't think goldens think enough about once they're retired.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Do you mean financially like they did.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
I think that's one of the things that I've known, this.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
Golden somebody from traveling like crazy or spending money. They
have to be on a budget because they know what's
left and how they have to live.
Speaker 2 (25:23):
But I'm saying I have met a lot of goldens
who don't get any thought. It's not I'm not talking
about what I agree with what you're saying. Young people
need to think back, you know, think hey, I'm going
to be retired someday. I'm talking about the people I've
met who are retired, who are spending like it's Christmas
every day and they're like, yeah, I'll worry about that later.
(25:44):
I'm like, I don't think they've figured out that we're
living longer, we're healthier. I find that amazing. You haven't
come across.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
One of the things that I've always said to people,
everybody back back when this is our parents and our grandparents,
and they would not they would do with that, They
wouldn't go on trips because they were saving it to
their golden years. I totally disagree with that. I think,
go while you're healthy and young, and you work for it,
and you go and take your holiday, and then you
(26:17):
pay for it and you save up for the next
time when it's finally retirement. A lot of times Kathy
who needs a knee replacement, who I know, my dad,
bless him. He retired. A week later, he got a
knee replacement, and six weeks later he passed, so he
never got to enjoy his retirement. So it just happens.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
But that's what I'm saying. Retirement looks so different today.
People who are retired still want to Some people who
are retired want to volunteer full time because they want
things to do. I will be honest with you. Most
of my friends, in fact, I would say ninety five
(27:00):
percent of my friends are not retired. They're between age
forty and sixty.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
And that's frustrating for us because we want to go
do things and they can't because they're still working or rightet.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
But and so I find that I find having as
much energy as I have as much time as I
have and the desire to do things. I think sometimes
people think retirement is going to be this opportunity to
do everything you want to do. But you know what,
I find I have to find people to do it
with me. And it's like a whole new set of
(27:36):
friends sometimes because you got to find people who can
do those things with you. And I think retirement is
not I mean, in my parents' generation, our parents do
live length that we're living our grandparents right.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Right right, And everybody's different, like they're not healthy enough
to go enjoy things, like they can't do it because
their health has been altered somehow.
Speaker 2 (27:59):
Yeah. I think my advice to Golden is not that
anyone's asking me today, but hey, what the hell? I
think Golden should spend more time concerned about their health
so that they can live active years. You know.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Can I say something else, Kathy, something that I didn't realize. Okay,
some people live on Medicare and they take.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
It no no, no, you mean social Security.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
Social Security and they take out for Medicare and they
take out for this, and then they own a home,
they have to pay taxes. There's nothing left for them.
And and I don't think people think about that. You
don't realize That's.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
What I'm saying. I think, I think, I think you
and I are doing a free advertisement for AIRP today sign.
But I do think that. I do think that retirement
looks very different today and that and I think that's
a good thing. But I will say I have had
some challenges finding people active, in to date, finding girlfriends
(29:03):
who can afford to travel or even want to travel.
Retirement looks very different in twenty twenty five than it did.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Our kids and our grandkids that are learning. You know,
I can't tell them enough, put them away, put away
for a ranger. Yeah, I'm telling you. I'm not telling
you do you have it?
Speaker 2 (29:22):
But do you tell your kids? Because I know we
have young grandchildren. I tell my kids all the time.
First of all, you know you and I travel a lot.
We're doing different things, and our kids are like, wait
a minute, we need you to babysit. Yeah, sorry, I
won't be home. But I always say to my kids
how energetic we are. Do you think our kids appreciate
(29:45):
how much energy we have in our retirement.
Speaker 1 (29:47):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (29:48):
I do.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
My kids just worry about me spending their inheritance.
Speaker 2 (29:53):
Well, that you know what that is Actually another question
for retirement. Do you do you think we should be
saving for to give money to our kids and should
we be spending every time in our retirement.
Speaker 1 (30:05):
Well, nobody spends every dime. But yes, you're hoping something's
left for them. But I'm not going to go with
al because I want to leave more. You're not not selfish.
I worked all my life, you know, so you with
them though, I like to go with them on vacation,
Like I just came back from the Outer Banks with
my son Christopher's family and a bunch of other people.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
So yeah, I brought my own family to Canada. Yes,
I that, But in retirement again, it's very different. My
retirement is very different from my parents when they retired.
But but that is another thing I want when you
talk about dating and retirement, I know you you have Frederick,
but I still talk about in retirement. I want someone
(30:51):
who wants who were family is important. I love spending
time with my family in retirement. I think, to me,
it's almost a red flag if I go out on
a date with a guy and he's like my kids,
that's their problem, you know. I'm I'm here to have fun,
do you. I'm that's a red flat for me, because
retirement is about.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
Having They wish I was around even more because.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
My kids you too. I don't know. I just think that,
you know, people talk about being invisible once they retire,
once they hurt sixty, being invisible. I just think retirement
today looks very different. Words active, We travel, we do things,
and I love that. And I hope all the people
out there who are listening today who are retired, to
(31:35):
realize that the misconceptions that you know you're retired, you
crow up on a sofa and read a book and
go to sleep. I hope people realize that that is
not what retirement is anymore.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
Still still being alive and enjoying your life and your families.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
You know, get now in life. I mean I want
retirement for me. Well, first of all, I plan on
living another account and tell my kids at thirty.
Speaker 1 (32:00):
More years, oh I'll be long gone. Cat, I'll save
you a spot. And that was fun.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
You're leaving me, Susan.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Yes, today for you, but everybody, let us know what
you thought about this conversation and where you're at in life.
You know, my retirement, you are retired, Some not those
of you that haven't looked into retirement savings.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Get busy.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
That is Susan's because thank you so much for joining
us today.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
Yeah, it's really great. I think I think these topics
are all interesting and we hope that you know we
gave you something to chew on, something to think about today. Yes,
but in the meantime, be sure to follow us. That's
our happy Hour because we have new episodes coming out
every week. You don't want to miss it this week
of retirement. Next week we're having a whole episode about dating.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Twenty year olds or I don't know, you never know.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
What interests sex with twenty year olds.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Listen in and make sure to submit your questions to us.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
And you know how to do that.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Just go to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or
dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
Listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio
app or wherever you listen to podcasts. Until next time,
have a great week.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
Jaff
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