November 18, 2025 • 45 mins
Today on “Golden Hour,” we’re back answering your questions! We kick things off with a proper catch-up. Susan has some exciting news and Kathy has some dating updates, so make sure you don’t miss it! Then, we start our advice portion with the question of the day: In a relationship, what’s the difference between compromise and settling? And, of course, we get into your questions; today’s are all about nasty in-laws and the pressure to get married. Plus, we end things with a Golden Spotlight; from how to improve with technology to the ways it’s ingrained in our daily lives, we’re getting into it all. Tune in now and be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
Welcome back everybody to Bachelor Happy Hour's Golden Hour. Thanks
again for joining us, and we're always so excited to
be back, aren't.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
We, Kathy, We are and I love these days because
today we're going to be answering more of your fan questions.
Make sure you're submitting those. We love reading them. All
you gotta do is go to Bachelor Nation dot com
slash Golden Hour and submit away.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Yes, send us everything, your questions, your updates, and your opinions,
all of it. You can also dm us on Instagram
at Bachelor Happy Hour. Oh kay, let's talk about our cruise.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Guess this Bachelor Okay, if you haven't heard, folks, Bachelor
Nation vacation at sea has finally been announced, and we
are so excited. You and I are going. Lots of
Bachelor Nation people are going to be on there, lots
of friends and couples, and.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
It's just going to be a party.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
I think it's going to be a NonStop party. I
have never been to Puerta Plata, but who doesn't love
a good cruise with us with dancing surprises. You know
what I'm most excited about, Susan is meeting so many
of the fans exactly, and I.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Write to us, we chat with them online. We don't
know what they look like or they are, you know
what I mean, just by their notes. And and we're
going to be doing a live podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
A live podcast, so that's going to be really fun. Also,
you know, folks out there, a lot of you are single,
as am I, and so I know it gets expensive
to go on a cruise, but there is a Facebook
page that you can go to. It's called Official Bachelor
Nation Vacation See Cruisers group. Go on Facebook, find that
(01:58):
group and join. It's a great way to make new friends,
maybe find a roommate for the cruise. It's a win win.
You're going to get to meet a lot of your
Bachelor Nation favorites. There are so many. We don't even
know all the surprises yet. But trust me, this is
going to be a cruise of a lifetime. You're going
to have a blast. So if you haven't booked your
(02:19):
cabin yet, go and do it now because you are
going to be so excited to come. And we can't
quit excited.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Everybody there me too.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
You know, people think that we see Bachelor Nation all
of our friends all the time. This is going to
be as much fun for us to see all of
you and chat with you, and you can see what
we're really like in person, which is exactly what we're
like on this podcast, by the way.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
And you'll be seeing us everywhere on that ship, and
I'm sure there's going to be things that we'll be
involved with with you, right. Yeah, we don't know what.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
It's gonna be great, but if we haven't sold you yet,
we're gonna be talking about it again. Book your cabin now.
Go to Bachelor Nation Vacation at Sea dot com and
book your cabin now. You will not regret this decision.
It's gonna be a blast. But okay, you're.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Gonna have fun. I'll have dinner with yous. I mean,
that's one of my favorite things to do, dinner and dancing.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
And as long as I'm shying, as long as gonna
have to cook it, I'm.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
In all right now. So before we dive into today's episode,
we want to do a little ketch up with you guys, like,
what's going on with us, Kathy, what's going on with you?
I know, for me, I'm getting excited because I'm sure
I mentioned it before. I was nominated for efficient of
(03:37):
the Year Award. I don't know if I'll get it,
but the time is come, Kata. I don't know what
to wear. I think I'm gonna do a post like
an evening gowns and have the fans pick one.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
I've seen what the choice is. You're gonna look gorgeous
no matter what you choose. And I'm putting it out
to the universe right now. I think you're gonna win
this award.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Oh my gosh. I don't know about winning, but just
to be there. I mean, it's an international thing and
there's so many titles like you be blown Away. So
I'm going to meet people from all over the world.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
That's so exciting and and you know what, I really
wanted to come, but I know, but I've got too
So this this event is in early December, mid December,
and I've got a couple of Christmas parties with my
family and my grandson has some music concerts, so I
can't be there. But trust and believe me, I will
be rooting for you, and you're gonna win. You're gonna
(04:32):
c cart home somebody.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
Winning is just being around people that you love, and
you know, when you get called up to the stage.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yeah, it's like your nerves, oh people, you.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Know, harder than being behind the cameras. Like being on
the show was not difficult. I forgot the cameras were there.
I was just me. But this is like spotlight you know.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Well, you know it's funny you say that because you
and I just and Nancy just did a an event.
Uh in it was. It's a company out of Jersey.
It's called Wigs and Wishes and they provide wigs for
women and children fighting that dreaded disease called cancer, and
then they give wishes, the grant wishes to children. It's
(05:16):
not make a Wish foundation, it's a grassroots organization. And Susan,
Nancy and I were there as you know, sort of
celebrity hosts whatever. And you're right when you're we all
were up on stage and in that moment, it's much
harder when it's something heartfelt than just having fun.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Because the emotions take over. We're not known.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Yeah, well you know what, you will be great. I
have no doubt. I wish I could be there because
but no, Susan, I'm wishing you well from Afar.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
Thank you, thank you, thank you, and your world.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
What's going on not you know, not so much.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
I know soon we'll be talking about the holidays and
people dating, and a lot of people get off. Some
people I know just get on the dating sites for
the holidays, which I think is crazy.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Well, you know, I'm not a big fan of dating
sites for a variety of reasons. I mean, hasn't been
successful for me, but I did so I've always said
to you I would love to meet somebody through just
a organic way, other than a dating site or whatever.
And I actually had a friend set me up with
(06:31):
a guy. And it's funny because the holidays really are tough,
you know, you go through all the memories and stuff,
but it would be nice to meet someone to share.
So what to share these things with? Right, So my
friend fixes me up and this guy Atlantic Coast Atlantic
East Coast guy. I'm from the East Coast. So I'm thinking, oh,
(06:54):
this could be it, because you know, I don't seem
to jive well with guys with ten gallon hats and
skull and holding up dead fish where I live in Texas.
Uh love Texas, but you know, there it is. And
so I thought, oh this, you know, this could be
my time. And interestingly, I knew his situation. His wife
(07:15):
had passed away, and you know your mind going in dating.
It's so different in our age, right, and so I'm
thinking this could be great. On the other hand, this
guy's lost his wife in the not too distant past.
And honestly, Susan, you know, I called you. We talked
about it, like, what do I do, Susan? Do I
jump in and try to date the guy?
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Knowing that maybe to I give that advice to anyone.
You have to take a chance, right, It doesn't always
work out in your favor, but you need to take
the chance. It stings, it stinks.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
But here's the thing for me, I knew that she
hadn't been gone that long, and so I was like,
and we all know men seem to find another partner
sooner than women and to find their partner. So I thought, well,
I can jump in or not. But if I don't
jump in, then I don't have a chance. And sure
(08:09):
enough I jumped in, and sure enough it became very yeah, well,
very quickly that he wanted somebody local, you know that,
And so I'm left with but.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
From what you told me, he wanted somebody that needed
him and needed somebody to depend on his finances is whatever.
You're very independent, and.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I am only to a point, Susan.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
I know I love our independence, yeah, and sometimes, And
I've been told this all my life, and I want
to know if you feel the same. Men say they
want an independent woman, but they really don't.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
And can I tell you are singing my song. I've
said that a hundred times. They really want someone who needs,
someone who depends on them. At least that's been my experience.
So that was a tough one for me, especially with
the holidays approaching. But you know what, honestly, I was
at a Gallo luncheon today and I was talking with
(09:15):
the woman next to me and we were talking about
She recognized me from the show, and she said, you know,
you're such an inspiration. I can't same old thing. I
can't believe there aren't men just lighting up at your door.
And I said to her, even if I never meet
another man or the man, you know what, Susan, I
am grateful. I have three great kids, I have five
(09:38):
great grandchildren. I have girlfriends, and I have to be
happy with that. And I think sometimes that's more important
being happy with who I am.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
It is, But when you're in the moment and you're
thinking about saving somebody, you forget all that.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
And I would love to meet someone. I would, but
you know what the lesson I learned is, uh, you know,
you have to go for it. If the chance, if
you've given the chance, you have to go for it.
But also I came off of it dis very disappointed.
I mean, you asked me, uh, what I would do
if he called me in a month and said it
didn't work out with the other woman he met, And
(10:17):
I said I would say no, thank you, because no.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
You said he'd have to like move mountains and have
not sitting out there.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Yeah, I said it would. Actually, you're right, I said
it would have for you. I said there would have
to be a very grand gesture, like naming a yacht
after me. Yeah, you're right. I did say.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
We have a friend that's about to meet somebody and
it's long distance and they've been chatting a while. I
won't mention it any names. And yeah, I know you're
nervous about it. I'm more excited about it. Kathy is
more logical about.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
This, you know why, because it's it's it's not that
I'm logical, Like when I hear that. I don't want
to see anybody hurt. I don't like that. And so
you know, as the holidays are coming, I'm hoping that, uh,
that guy is right around the corner for me. But
if not, I have so many things in my life
to be grateful for and that's what I'm holding on
to absolutely.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
And with that said, it's leave season. Can I tell.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
You it's what's the leaves falling? Oh?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
I get out there with my blower, Cathy, and no,
sooner did I finish the front. I get out back
and they're down in the front again.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Okay, I have to tell you I had thirteen I
have a very small yard. You've been to my house.
I had thirteen bags of mult spread the other day.
I didn't think it through, Susan. The acorns. No, the
acorns are now falling on top of the mulcha. And
of I don't get the acorns out, then I have
oak trees. So every day talk about being anal. Every
(11:48):
day I go out and get at least one hundred
of the acorns that have fallen, because it's either getting
them before they sprout or pulling the mini trees out
of the This is what we do when we're not
doing our podcast. Friends, Susan is blowing leaves and Happy
is pulling out.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
I put a post out there, let's start talking about
the mean people out in the world. People with their
comments again, I had the lower and the lawnmower, but
I hadn't opened the brown bags yet. They're the big
leaf bags to dumb people were commenting, what do you do?
Just blow the leaves and mulch them and leave them there,
(12:23):
And other people are saying, well, yeah, I think that's
like fertilization for you.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
For you know what, Susan, I've got an idea for
a video for you. Take your blower and just blow
it at the camera and say all done.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
There's somebody else. Why are you in white? It was
a hoodie. I mean, come on, I.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Was filthy, you know what. Lived interiously, go buy yourself
a cheap wedding gown at Goodwill and you got to
get you know what, give the people what they want.
That's what I say. Go get a wedding gown in
white and start blowing the leaves.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
I'm going to go out my sparkly ill cut the lawn.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
You know what. I gotta be careful though, because mister
Wright may be looking at my posts. So you know,
I don't want the guy thinking what kind of weird
I was out there picking up acorns like I don't.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
Know, and she's not going to need me. Look at her.
She got her power tools going on. Remember that you're
Nancy Caven. We had our face done last year, and
Nancy Caven she was blowing the leaves because I was
out there with the baby right.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Oh my god, I forgot that.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
A year already.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
You know what. Times guys were having fun and we're
having a blast. Okay, it's time to get into the episode.
Let's start with the question of the day, my favorite time.
Are you ready, Susan, Let's do it. Here we go.
Since we've discussed settling in a relationship, our listeners are
(13:54):
curious on how you draw the line between compromise and
settling in a relationship. Ship. So what does compromise look
like in a relationship and can compromise turn into settling? Okay,
so you and I actually we have talked about this, yes,
and the the there is a difference I think between
(14:17):
the compromise to.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
Me, compromises something smaller like settling is something that you
just knew, which is one of your red flags, and
you're going to go be okay with it. That would
be settling for me.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
Well, I think I think compromise is is a healthy,
good choice. Compromising could be something like I don't want
to go for Chinese food. I want to go to
a steakhouse. Well, I, and your partner says something else.
I think those are compromises. I think settling has to
(14:51):
do with a compromise, compromising your own moral compass or
your value system. So it gets a little confusing when
you use that terminology. But settling is for me is
when I have been in a relationship and I know
it's not the relationship for me. I know that I'm
(15:11):
making decisions that don't sit well in my heart, in
my spirit, and I've sort of forced myself to do it.
Going to a steakhouse instead of a Chinese restaurant, to me,
is a compromise, and good relationships make those compromises.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Kathy, what do you feel could compromises turn into settling
in a relationship?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Oh? Well, for me again, at our age, it's a
little bit different. But for me, I'll give you a
very big example for me and people in our age
talk about this all the time. Moving if you find
mister Wright, are you willing to move? So to me,
if I want to be with the man, it is
(16:00):
a compromise. It would be a compromise for me to
not see my grandchildren and my kids every week. But
I would be willing to compromise because I want to
be with the man I'm in love with. That to
me would be a compromise. Settling would be this guy
wants to move to you know, East Overshoe, and I'm
going to see my kids once a year. Then I'm
(16:22):
settling because I know in my heart that I want
to see my kids and my grandkids more. But I'm
afraid of losing this guy. I'm afraid that there won't
be another opportunity. So I say, okay, and I move
to East Overshoe, which is, you know, four thousand miles
around the globe. And I'm miserable I settled.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Probably regret it.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
Oh, I think, I Well, for me, you know what
about you? I mean to be yes, I can't settle,
so I don't me.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Settling is like say you have a picture of what
the person should be like, okay, in his qualities, and
you're going to settle for less because you don't want
to be alone like that is not.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
See okay, this is where you and I are going
to disagree. No, unless you are, you know, Frederick, notwithstanding,
I don't think there is a person out there for
either of us that meets everything. No, absolutely not. Well
you you just said if he doesn't have to, then
you're settling.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
And my list has changed over the years as we
both talked about it many times, because we're not looking
for the same things anymore. Correct. So what I mean
by this is like, for instance, somebody that's rude to
the waitress or the waiter, and you're going to settle
and say I'm okay with that as long as he
says he's going to stop doing it. That's something that's
(17:47):
never going to change, and you will end up resenting
him for it.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
That's just as I don't, I don't, I mean, I
hear you. To me, those aren't settling issues. That that's
a character flaw that maybe was he just had a
bad night. No, just maybe had a bad night in
a restaurant. I mean to me, settling are the really
big issues of life here for me would be settling. Listen,
(18:15):
he says, you know, my my, I'm making these things up.
You know, my daughter lives in London and we're gonna
have to spend every Christmas in London. That's not a compromise.
That is settling. That is a big that's not healthy
for my brain, for my family, for my own well being.
And I think that's what it comes down to. For me.
(18:36):
Settling is when you have that icky feeling that this guy.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Isn't there that you want, yeah, feeling.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
There's oh, I don't know. There's always going to be
things in a relationship that could be improved. But I
think for me it's so clear. I don't know if
I'm articulating it well, but for me, settling is doing something,
is having a relationship with someone that goes against my
(19:07):
inner grain. My spirituality is something that I know that
I should be doing this, but I'm doing it.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
And let me let me put a car, for instance,
I want a car that has this heated steering wheel, Well,
I'll settle for this car even though it doesn't have it.
Like that kind of thing. When it comes to a relationship,
that's a whole other world. It's a relationship. It's something
that you will live to regret if you.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Have you settled in relationships before.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
I don't believe so, oh I've compromised.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Oh I have definitely settled, not long term, because that's
why I but that's why it doesn't. That's why it doesn't.
But anyway, I think that I think people mistake they
mix up the two terms because I could see how Yeah, yeah,
for everyone out there who doesn't who's in a relationship,
(20:03):
who doesn't think you will be compromising, You're going to
make a lot of compromises in your relationship. You're going
to make a lot of sacrifices to.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Make the relationship work. You can't be right all the time.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Right and right. And that's why I'm saying it's it's
it's those really deep, uh guiding force that when you
go against it, then you know you're settling. And it's
that feeling like you just try to push it away
and and and say it's not the part you know
it is, so you know a waight or being rude
to a way to that to me is not that's
(20:37):
not a settling issue that.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
But if that was his trait, that he does it
all the time, that would be something that yeah, both
of you and I both know that we would never
tolerate it. We would never agree that that's okay.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
But yeah, well you know anyway, it's listen. I'd have
to have the relationship to talk about compromise or settling.
So I mean, I would ask you one thing and
you don't have to answer it. What is the biggest
compromise you've made with Frederick so far? Because you've told
me you're not settling, So what's the biggest compromise you've made?
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Being okay with him not being as neat as I am?
Speaker 2 (21:15):
That's the biggest COMPROMI Cath, you know me, that's true.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Huge. All right, let's get into our fan questions for today.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
Frederick get it cleaned up while she's working there to
get that house ship shape. All right, I'm going.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
To start us off, and this is from anonymous Kathy
and Susan. I really need your advice. I've always struggled
with my relationship with my sister in law. When my
husband and I first started dating in college, she and
I weren't around each other much for the first two years.
They barely acknowledged me, and when they finally did, it
(21:52):
often felt like they were poking fun at me. Last fall,
four days after my husband and I got engaged, she
announced she was three weeks pregnant. To make matters worse,
she shared the news at a family dinner that she
had intentionally not included me in Ooh, it felt like
(22:12):
our engagement had been completely overshadowed, and I spiraled. When
my mother in law heard we were upset, she made
us come over to talk. She revealed my sister in
law had admitted she was getting close to me on purpose. Oh,
she wasn't getting close to me on purpose. Excuse me,
(22:35):
My l pressured me. Mother in law pressured me into
confronting her. So I did, honestly and with an open heart.
But instead of apologizing, my sister in law dismissed everything,
made excuses, and told me never to bring it up again.
Not long after my mom scheduled my bridal shower. Three
(22:56):
months before my bridal shower, my mother in law told
me the only weekends she'd like for my sister in
law's baby shower were either the day after my shower
or four days before. I begged her not to schedule
it in the same weekend. Unsurprisingly, most of their skip
(23:16):
Most of them skipped my shower. My sister in law's
baby shower was four days before mine, and she had
a second one the day after mine. By this point
I had been in therapy for months trying to learn
how to best handle their family. Things escalated again when
it came to choosing our bridal party. My husband and
(23:37):
my mother in law initially agreed it would be easiest
if his sister and her husband weren't in the wedding.
I was completely fine with this decision given the history,
but when we told them, it turned into a yelling match.
My sister in law actually said a wedding is an important,
a baby is important. Months later, my mother in law
(24:01):
took me estate sailing and broke down crying about how
devastated she was that they weren't in the wedding. At
that point I caved. I was exhausted from fighting and
just gave in. So they ended up being in the wedding.
After all, Our wedding day itself was beautiful, but their
lack of consideration was obvious. They left early and didn't
(24:25):
even bother to give us a card let, alone a gift.
After everything, it felt like one final reminder of how
selfish they are. I need to get past this as
they are my husband's family. But wow, is that tough?
How would you handle things going forward? Love you both? Woa,
(24:47):
they're bitches.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
You know what? I think this might have been my
sister in law. Oh my, I think this is it's
my sister in law reincarnated.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Well wait, I knew you were going to was something.
But your sister in law too.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
There were two, There were twins. One is the sweetest
one known to man. The other one is from hell.
She rides on a broom. Well, let's not let's not
talk about her, you know, let's just have positive hair. Okay,
here's what I think. I think a couple of things.
The husband. First of all, their their behavior anonymous is
(25:24):
just ridiculous. It's it's intolerable, it is disgraceful, it is rude,
it's unkind. I can you know. I can give you
enough abjectives to fill the hour here. But your husband
and your mother in law agreed that they shouldn't be
in the wedding. And I'm sorry that you quote unquote
(25:45):
caved because you could have just left it alone and
said I'm sorry, you know, your mom, your brother, We
all agreed and pushed it off on her family. You
didn't do that, and I understand, and the moment it
was probably difficult. You're when she says, your sister in
(26:05):
law says babies are important, weddings aren't. I mean that
tells you everything right there. But I'll bet you one thing.
I bet her wedding was important.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
So here's the dare she say?
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Yeah? But here's the thing you But here's the thing.
They're not nice people. You can spend the rest of
your life, Anonymous, getting even, or you and your husband
can have a serious talk about building your own family
when you have children and seeing your in laws, sister
(26:36):
in law, mother in law when it is convenient. And
I'm sorry to say this, but I say it from experience.
Anonymous put away the idea of the Norman Rockwell family
Sunday gatherings kumbayah. It's probably never going to happen. So
(26:59):
you know, be polite, always be polite.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Yes, what do you think? Obviously there's two choices here,
like for them not even to leave a card or
a gift of any sort. To do the same thing
to her is not something I recommend.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
She's already married, already married, she's already.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Saying about the baby gifts. You know what I'm saying
as far as your mother in law is concerned, I mean,
really to start having a hissy fit because they're not
in the wedding and then you do this, well.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
No, no, no change.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
The mother in law be this way.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Yes, but the mother in law and son her husband
agreed for them, not for her not to be in
the wedding. I think it's just as you know the
old in the Old Country. This is a mission us
and you're not going to fix it.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
So how about when they were talking Kathy about please
don't have it the same week as my baby shower,
I mean my wedding shower, and then they did it
four days before. That's just rude. And half the people
didn't go to the second one.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
Yeah, so didn't come to the wedding shower. So so
what you know, focus on the marriage with your husband.
You know, I have a friend in California who I
have this conversation with who has trouble with her mother
in law, similar kind of situation. From you know, she
seems to have the most fabulous husband and she has
a fabulous child. And focus on your family. That's what
(28:27):
I wish I had done more of and just seeing
the mother in law when I had to seeing.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
The But you know that's stung until you did.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
And that's what I'm saying, Anonymous, learn what took me
many years. Be polite. Don't invite them on vacation, invite
them for uh dinner? They can't come, Oh dear, I'm suys,
So maybe another time. Always be aboud.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
I wouldn't all for dinner, No freaking way for her.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
You know why I would because I love.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
She'd probably cancel.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
That's okay. I love my husband, and if it was
important to my husband, I would do it. I didn't
say I would do it. I would say I would invite,
and then when they say no, thank you, I'd look
at my husband and say, I love you so much.
I'm glad we're a family.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
And how about when does sister in law admit it
that she wasn't getting close to her own purpose?
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Anonymous, they're not nice people. Get over it. You have
a lovely husband, Get over the fact that your sister
in law seems to be a selfish bitch. Your mother
in law seems to be totally invested in her daughter.
Get over it. So I'm sorry. I don't mean to
sound hard. I'm giving you the advice Anonymous that I
(29:52):
wished I had taken my own marriage because my mother
in law was brutal and my and my father in
law and it was it really did cause issues for
my husband and myself and I had a great husband,
so I do. I always used to say to my husband,
like did a pity you know? Did you get dropped
by the stork? Like where did you come from?
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Because you exchange gifts at Christmas? Getter an ugly Christmas Sweatery.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
Okay, we're moving on, we're anonymously.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
I feel your pain. I'm honest to God, and I
know from Kathy's experience it's not easy. And it's easy
for us to say, just go about your life, worry
about you and your husband. But it does sting. We're
not going to excuse.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
That, right. It does sting, but it's not going to change.
So don't spend spend your effort making your marriage good,
making your husband happy, building your relationship. When you guys
have children, build your family, because ultimately that is what's
going to matter in your life. And let us know, Anonymous,
how things go. And by the way, congrats on your wedding. Okay,
(30:59):
let's move on to question two from another anonymous writer
and Jesse. Y'all know, don't ever feel like you have
to put your name in when you send us questions.
Were going to answer them whether you put your name
down or not. So good good for you for writing this. Hi, ladies,
(31:23):
I'm wondering what your take is on couples being together
for a long time before they get engaged. I've been
with my boyfriend for three years and we're in our
mid twenties. We're already getting the quote when you're getting
engaged questions, and they're getting more and more and more
frequent from friends and family. My boyfriend and I have
talked about marriage. We're confident we are each other's endgame.
(31:46):
My boyfriend is holding off on marriage due to money,
you know, wedding costs, figuring out where we want to
settle down, and then buying a house, et cetera. For me,
not only do I agree with those reasons, I also
just don't feel ready to get get married. It almost
feels like I'm too young, even though I'm really not.
So I know where I stand in my relationship. But
(32:08):
my question is this Why do people view it as
such a red flag if you are together for a
long time before getting married, should I be concerned that
we don't feel ready yet? I guess I'm just looking
for an outside perspective to help me feel more confident
in how I feel. Thanks, ladies, what do you think?
Speaker 1 (32:25):
Literally not? You do it when you're ready. Don't let
other people influence you one way or the other. I
think it's just old school. You know, you're together so
many years, the next thing in line is the engagement,
and the next thing is the marriage, and then the
next thing is you have a baby. Not You don't
have to necessarily follow that rule. You do you? But
(32:50):
when she says I don't feel ready to get married,
like it's her age that she said, it's almost like
I feel too young, even though I'm not. She's good
in her relationship. But let me ask this, and Kathy,
I want your opinion. If you're with somebody three years
(33:10):
and do you not know what is I'm too young
to get married me?
Speaker 2 (33:19):
Well, they're in their mid twenties and these are all
judgment calls. I think getting married in your mid twenties
is about as early, especially in this world in this
day and time that you want to get married. But
who am I like, I'm not a judge jury here.
I mean my daughter dated a guy three years and
didn't end up marrying. I don't think there's yeah, there's no,
(33:42):
there's no. I think Anonymous. I think Susan's right. People
just tend to go with tradition. They tend to go
with historically people date get married to all those things.
But I do want to say one thing too, Anonymous.
Your boyfriend, you said, is holding off on marriage due
(34:05):
to the wedding costs where you want to settle down
by a house. Let me just tell you those things
are fluid in life. You may buy six houses, you
may move to four different cities. You may decide on
a huge wedding, you may decide to elope, you may
decide you're not ready to have children for five years,
(34:26):
ten years. These are things that change over time. And
so what I don't hear you saying is that your husband, sorry,
your boyfriend, is not ready because of the costs and
those decisions, and you feel like you're too young. So
what I'm hearing is a good relationship where you two
(34:50):
enjoy each other. I'm assuming you both work. You know
where you stand in your relationship and you're comfortable with that,
and you know what that is a sign of charity.
You know what you want today. You don't have to
be looking ten years down the road. But I would
encourage you and your boyfriend to talk about the fact
(35:10):
that you know, is the time ever perfect? I assure
you it's never perfect time to have children. You know,
the house you buy. A year after you buy it,
you make it transferred for work, So be a.
Speaker 1 (35:22):
Little more kathy. What about to say, well, let's just
do us and then when we're twenty nine or thirty,
we'll revisit the marriage thing. Do we still feel like?
I mean, what is the wedding? The marriage you commit
to one another or you're legally binding because of a
piece of paper and marriage. I don't think they're really
(35:42):
sure yet. I don't think they're there yet.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
I don't listen, lots of people have children and they're
not married. Lots of people live together not married, absolutly
lots of people. Define what works for you, Anonymous, define
you and your boyfriend define the relationship that works for you,
and and revel in it, enjoy what you have together
and don't worry so much about the future, you.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Know, well, pleas pertay these comments, Kathy, like she's saying,
why do they always view it as it?
Speaker 2 (36:10):
Right?
Speaker 1 (36:11):
Well, it's when are you going to get married? Just
say someday, someday ready.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
You know, you know you don't even have to say that,
say I'm If your friends are married and Anonymous, you
can say them, I'm so glad you're married and you
have the life you want. Whatever. Your boyfriend, let's call
them Johnny. Johnny and I right now are living our
best lives. We're in this great chapter of our life
and we're so happy. And you know, life gives us
all lots of chapters, and we're in this one right
(36:38):
now and we're having fun and let it go exactly.
And I'm happy that you found happiness because ultimately, Anonymous,
finding love and happiness is the most important thing in life.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
It is. And just do you and enjoy this time
with him?
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Yeah, all right, but let us know, Wait, Susan, you're
losing your touch. I can't believe you didn't make an advertisement.
If they do decide to get married, that you're a
wedding Officiacy.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Well, she's not ready yet.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Okay, well when you do. If you do, Susan, we'll
be available. I can appciate and I'll come throw rose pedals.
All right, we're going to move in to I love this.
We're going to do another Golden Spotlight, and this one
is all about technology. Boy, Okay, let's talk. I mean you,
I don't know about you. I was born with black
(37:25):
and white television. Let's just start with that. When my
kids were young. Yeah, I mean when my kids were young,
we didn't have computers. My first phone was like a suitcase.
I remember the first computer I got my kids. It
was a Macintosh Apple. The thing was just huge. Why
do you think, I mean, I know what I think.
(37:45):
Why do you think Golden struggles so much with technology.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
Because they're not used to it. They weren't taught it
in school. When you do it every day it's a
part of life, then you learn it better. I just
know with my A, my my chat, she he's like
my best friend.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
Okay, yeah, but you know that bothers me that you
use that. Let me just you you went straight to AI.
You know. AI has some great uses, but it.
Speaker 1 (38:14):
Does for it keeps me from having the Google research.
I just asked him if he goes and looks.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Yeah, But see that's lazy, Susan, you're being a lot.
Speaker 1 (38:22):
I don't there's not enough time in the day. Some
days when you want some information, do you not ask
Alexa something like Alexa, what's the weather today?
Speaker 2 (38:30):
No?
Speaker 1 (38:31):
I don't ever ask her what the weather.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
I don't ask Alexa what times? You know? I use
Alexa tron on my music, and I use Alexa set
a timer when I'm baking.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
Before I open my eyes and I'm laying in bed.
I want enough time, and I don't want to look
at a phone or any lights. So I say, Alexa,
what time is it?
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Okay? But that's then Chap gbt write me a letter
to my landlord. So I mean, I just think it's
well worded.
Speaker 1 (38:58):
You wouldn't understand that because you were in English. I
mean I get that.
Speaker 2 (39:02):
Oh well, all right, back to the tell technology that
I think. I think goldens. Uh right. We did grow up.
I know myself. I challenge myself to try to learn things,
and sometimes I failed late. And but once someone I
do want to learn, like I want to learn how
to do as uh, I'll get somebody teach me how
(39:26):
to do it, or I'll research it, like I'll do
a YouTube video. But I think goldens are you know,
they grew up on freaking rotary phones, and you know
what the young people are listening is going, what the
hell is a rotary phone? However, I think I think technology.
I don't know if you if you heard about this,
but families today, thank god my children are grown, because
(39:51):
you know, giving kids smartphones when they're six. I don't
subscribe to it, but a lot of families are going
back to landlines and giving their kids, like, you know,
a phone and a phone number. Yeah, go ahead and
talk to your friends because they don't want them being
being uh involved. Also social media, you know, that's that's
(40:11):
my that's right. And technology is social media. It's a
I I have found doing videos for me. Uh it's
not as intuitive, That's what I would say younger kids,
because they grew up on it. It's intuitive. You know,
click on this highlight post, click, just clicking pieces and
(40:32):
and to me, that's not as intuitive. But I get it.
People say to me, Kathy, how can you write that
so well? I don't know. It's I've done it so long.
It's intuitive. It's just what we grew up with. However,
I think a lot of people our age. My sister
is one for I mean she just told me yesterday
her she has an iPhone six and she has to
(40:55):
get rid of it because it's not being supported anymore.
Speaker 1 (40:57):
I mean she used it updated.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
Yeah, she to call people. I mean she. I take
pride in being twenty nine as I am and learning
new technology all the time. But I don't think people
Golden's necessarily want to how many how many people were
on at before you and I went on the show
because of my job that.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
I hadn't understand Instagram?
Speaker 2 (41:21):
I know, okay, I was on Instagram. I was one
of the first. Uh, I had it when it used
to be and Twitter now my space x when it
was one hundred and forty characters, like from the beginning
of time. But you have to want I think you
have to have a curious mind.
Speaker 1 (41:39):
It does it hard to learn? Yeah? Yeah? And I
stand it. Yeah, And I think that, Well, do you
remember your my grandmother, I'm sure yours when we had
cell phones or a computer and she's like, oh my god,
what is the world coming to?
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Like what does that do?
Speaker 1 (41:56):
They had encyclopedias that we look up things. You know
what I mean.
Speaker 2 (42:00):
I mean, yeah, today, I will say I love for
me all being able to research things online and so
go down rabbit, you know, type in something on my
computer and and you can be like you said, type
that's right there, typewriter. Yeah, but I'm saying I love that.
I love learning new technology. I'm not as good as
(42:22):
I would like to be, but I actually like it.
I will tell you I don't think this affects Golden's
as much, but it's my PSA for the day. My
biggest problem with social media, and it just gets more
with with TikTok and all the different social media platforms.
(42:43):
Young people today do not They first of all, spend
too much time in technology. They're just glued to their phones.
But they also think that everything they see on well
that it's that it's everyone's complete life. And I always say,
back when I was an educational consultant, the world that
(43:03):
we see that people post on Instagram, on TikTok, on
any social media is the lives they want. It's the
lives they want to portray that they're living that kind
of life twenty four to seven, and they're not. And
so I think that is a problem, which it.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Is part of the new age, if you will. Because
me being in hairdressing and I used to give out
a free makeover, color cut, a whole new look makeup,
and that would sell me. People would say, who did.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
Now you could just do it, you could just google
it how to do it.
Speaker 1 (43:37):
Well, no, because now you have to advertise for yourself,
your bolliage. You got to take pictures of every client.
I worked on a thirty minute book. And then when
you're taking pictures, unless you hire a photographer to come
into salon with you, you have to sell yourself out there
on social media for hair just because.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
But see, in some ways, I think that's great. It's
I mean, there's two sides of it. The good side
of the coin is the tech boom has made its connection.
It's made connection to careers, to jobs, to people to
opportunities so much more prevalent. And that's fabulous. I love
that part of it. I don't like the part that
(44:18):
people spend too much time, including Golden's, on technology and
not development.
Speaker 1 (44:24):
We take so much time sometimes because it takes us
a long time to figure it out.
Speaker 2 (44:27):
Kauz, Yeah, well, yeah, I'm better than most. I actually though,
could you give up your phone? Could you give up
no physiastic chat GBT to write our next letter for
I'm going to get you off that.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
I love that, I love it all right. We can
just talk about this for hours, you know that, right always?
And that was fun And I wanted to thank all
of our listeners for joining us today. We really enjoy
talking with you, sharing our ideas with you, and love
when you tell us things.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
Yeah, we we really enjoyed. Be sure to follow us
Batchelor Happy Hour. We have new episodes coming out every week.
You don't want to miss even one.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
Not at well, and make sure you submit your questions
to us, and you remember how to do that. Go
to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or dm us
on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 2 (45:20):
Yeah, please do that. Take a minute to use your
technology to reach out to us. That's what we want.
But in the meantime, listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden
Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to
your podcasts. Until next time, have a great week.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
Thank you,
Welcome back everybody to Bachelor Happy Hour's Golden Hour. Thanks
again for joining us, and we're always so excited to
be back, aren't.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
We, Kathy, We are and I love these days because
today we're going to be answering more of your fan questions.
Make sure you're submitting those. We love reading them. All
you gotta do is go to Bachelor Nation dot com
slash Golden Hour and submit away.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Yes, send us everything, your questions, your updates, and your opinions,
all of it. You can also dm us on Instagram
at Bachelor Happy Hour. Oh kay, let's talk about our cruise.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Guess this Bachelor Okay, if you haven't heard, folks, Bachelor
Nation vacation at sea has finally been announced, and we
are so excited. You and I are going. Lots of
Bachelor Nation people are going to be on there, lots
of friends and couples, and.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
It's just going to be a party.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
I think it's going to be a NonStop party. I
have never been to Puerta Plata, but who doesn't love
a good cruise with us with dancing surprises. You know
what I'm most excited about, Susan is meeting so many
of the fans exactly, and I.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Write to us, we chat with them online. We don't
know what they look like or they are, you know
what I mean, just by their notes. And and we're
going to be doing a live podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
A live podcast, so that's going to be really fun. Also,
you know, folks out there, a lot of you are single,
as am I, and so I know it gets expensive
to go on a cruise, but there is a Facebook
page that you can go to. It's called Official Bachelor
Nation Vacation See Cruisers group. Go on Facebook, find that
(01:58):
group and join. It's a great way to make new friends,
maybe find a roommate for the cruise. It's a win win.
You're going to get to meet a lot of your
Bachelor Nation favorites. There are so many. We don't even
know all the surprises yet. But trust me, this is
going to be a cruise of a lifetime. You're going
to have a blast. So if you haven't booked your
(02:19):
cabin yet, go and do it now because you are
going to be so excited to come. And we can't
quit excited.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
Everybody there me too.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
You know, people think that we see Bachelor Nation all
of our friends all the time. This is going to
be as much fun for us to see all of
you and chat with you, and you can see what
we're really like in person, which is exactly what we're
like on this podcast, by the way.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
And you'll be seeing us everywhere on that ship, and
I'm sure there's going to be things that we'll be
involved with with you, right. Yeah, we don't know what.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
It's gonna be great, but if we haven't sold you yet,
we're gonna be talking about it again. Book your cabin now.
Go to Bachelor Nation Vacation at Sea dot com and
book your cabin now. You will not regret this decision.
It's gonna be a blast. But okay, you're.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Gonna have fun. I'll have dinner with yous. I mean,
that's one of my favorite things to do, dinner and dancing.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
And as long as I'm shying, as long as gonna
have to cook it, I'm.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
In all right now. So before we dive into today's episode,
we want to do a little ketch up with you guys, like,
what's going on with us, Kathy, what's going on with you?
I know, for me, I'm getting excited because I'm sure
I mentioned it before. I was nominated for efficient of
(03:37):
the Year Award. I don't know if I'll get it,
but the time is come, Kata. I don't know what
to wear. I think I'm gonna do a post like
an evening gowns and have the fans pick one.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
I've seen what the choice is. You're gonna look gorgeous
no matter what you choose. And I'm putting it out
to the universe right now. I think you're gonna win
this award.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Oh my gosh. I don't know about winning, but just
to be there. I mean, it's an international thing and
there's so many titles like you be blown Away. So
I'm going to meet people from all over the world.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
That's so exciting and and you know what, I really
wanted to come, but I know, but I've got too
So this this event is in early December, mid December,
and I've got a couple of Christmas parties with my
family and my grandson has some music concerts, so I
can't be there. But trust and believe me, I will
be rooting for you, and you're gonna win. You're gonna
(04:32):
c cart home somebody.
Speaker 1 (04:34):
Winning is just being around people that you love, and
you know, when you get called up to the stage.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yeah, it's like your nerves, oh people, you.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
Know, harder than being behind the cameras. Like being on
the show was not difficult. I forgot the cameras were there.
I was just me. But this is like spotlight you know.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
Well, you know it's funny you say that because you
and I just and Nancy just did a an event.
Uh in it was. It's a company out of Jersey.
It's called Wigs and Wishes and they provide wigs for
women and children fighting that dreaded disease called cancer, and
then they give wishes, the grant wishes to children. It's
(05:16):
not make a Wish foundation, it's a grassroots organization. And Susan,
Nancy and I were there as you know, sort of
celebrity hosts whatever. And you're right when you're we all
were up on stage and in that moment, it's much
harder when it's something heartfelt than just having fun.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Because the emotions take over. We're not known.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Yeah, well you know what, you will be great. I
have no doubt. I wish I could be there because
but no, Susan, I'm wishing you well from Afar.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
Thank you, thank you, thank you, and your world.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
What's going on not you know, not so much.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
I know soon we'll be talking about the holidays and
people dating, and a lot of people get off. Some
people I know just get on the dating sites for
the holidays, which I think is crazy.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Well, you know, I'm not a big fan of dating
sites for a variety of reasons. I mean, hasn't been
successful for me, but I did so I've always said
to you I would love to meet somebody through just
a organic way, other than a dating site or whatever.
And I actually had a friend set me up with
(06:31):
a guy. And it's funny because the holidays really are tough,
you know, you go through all the memories and stuff,
but it would be nice to meet someone to share.
So what to share these things with? Right, So my
friend fixes me up and this guy Atlantic Coast Atlantic
East Coast guy. I'm from the East Coast. So I'm thinking, oh,
(06:54):
this could be it, because you know, I don't seem
to jive well with guys with ten gallon hats and
skull and holding up dead fish where I live in Texas.
Uh love Texas, but you know, there it is. And
so I thought, oh this, you know, this could be
my time. And interestingly, I knew his situation. His wife
(07:15):
had passed away, and you know your mind going in dating.
It's so different in our age, right, and so I'm
thinking this could be great. On the other hand, this
guy's lost his wife in the not too distant past.
And honestly, Susan, you know, I called you. We talked
about it, like, what do I do, Susan? Do I
jump in and try to date the guy?
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Knowing that maybe to I give that advice to anyone.
You have to take a chance, right, It doesn't always
work out in your favor, but you need to take
the chance. It stings, it stinks.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
But here's the thing for me, I knew that she
hadn't been gone that long, and so I was like,
and we all know men seem to find another partner
sooner than women and to find their partner. So I thought, well,
I can jump in or not. But if I don't
jump in, then I don't have a chance. And sure
(08:09):
enough I jumped in, and sure enough it became very yeah, well,
very quickly that he wanted somebody local, you know that,
And so I'm left with but.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
From what you told me, he wanted somebody that needed
him and needed somebody to depend on his finances is whatever.
You're very independent, and.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
I am only to a point, Susan.
Speaker 1 (08:34):
I know I love our independence, yeah, and sometimes, And
I've been told this all my life, and I want
to know if you feel the same. Men say they
want an independent woman, but they really don't.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
And can I tell you are singing my song. I've
said that a hundred times. They really want someone who needs,
someone who depends on them. At least that's been my experience.
So that was a tough one for me, especially with
the holidays approaching. But you know what, honestly, I was
at a Gallo luncheon today and I was talking with
(09:15):
the woman next to me and we were talking about
She recognized me from the show, and she said, you know,
you're such an inspiration. I can't same old thing. I
can't believe there aren't men just lighting up at your door.
And I said to her, even if I never meet
another man or the man, you know what, Susan, I
am grateful. I have three great kids, I have five
(09:38):
great grandchildren. I have girlfriends, and I have to be
happy with that. And I think sometimes that's more important
being happy with who I am.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
It is, But when you're in the moment and you're
thinking about saving somebody, you forget all that.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
And I would love to meet someone. I would, but
you know what the lesson I learned is, uh, you know,
you have to go for it. If the chance, if
you've given the chance, you have to go for it.
But also I came off of it dis very disappointed.
I mean, you asked me, uh, what I would do
if he called me in a month and said it
didn't work out with the other woman he met, And
(10:17):
I said I would say no, thank you, because no.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
You said he'd have to like move mountains and have
not sitting out there.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Yeah, I said it would. Actually, you're right, I said
it would have for you. I said there would have
to be a very grand gesture, like naming a yacht
after me. Yeah, you're right. I did say.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
We have a friend that's about to meet somebody and
it's long distance and they've been chatting a while. I
won't mention it any names. And yeah, I know you're
nervous about it. I'm more excited about it. Kathy is
more logical about.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
This, you know why, because it's it's it's not that
I'm logical, Like when I hear that. I don't want
to see anybody hurt. I don't like that. And so
you know, as the holidays are coming, I'm hoping that, uh,
that guy is right around the corner for me. But
if not, I have so many things in my life
to be grateful for and that's what I'm holding on
to absolutely.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
And with that said, it's leave season. Can I tell.
Speaker 2 (11:12):
You it's what's the leaves falling? Oh?
Speaker 1 (11:16):
I get out there with my blower, Cathy, and no,
sooner did I finish the front. I get out back
and they're down in the front again.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Okay, I have to tell you I had thirteen I
have a very small yard. You've been to my house.
I had thirteen bags of mult spread the other day.
I didn't think it through, Susan. The acorns. No, the
acorns are now falling on top of the mulcha. And
of I don't get the acorns out, then I have
oak trees. So every day talk about being anal. Every
(11:48):
day I go out and get at least one hundred
of the acorns that have fallen, because it's either getting
them before they sprout or pulling the mini trees out
of the This is what we do when we're not
doing our podcast. Friends, Susan is blowing leaves and Happy
is pulling out.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
I put a post out there, let's start talking about
the mean people out in the world. People with their
comments again, I had the lower and the lawnmower, but
I hadn't opened the brown bags yet. They're the big
leaf bags to dumb people were commenting, what do you do?
Just blow the leaves and mulch them and leave them there,
(12:23):
And other people are saying, well, yeah, I think that's
like fertilization for you.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
For you know what, Susan, I've got an idea for
a video for you. Take your blower and just blow
it at the camera and say all done.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
There's somebody else. Why are you in white? It was
a hoodie. I mean, come on, I.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Was filthy, you know what. Lived interiously, go buy yourself
a cheap wedding gown at Goodwill and you got to
get you know what, give the people what they want.
That's what I say. Go get a wedding gown in
white and start blowing the leaves.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
I'm going to go out my sparkly ill cut the lawn.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
You know what. I gotta be careful though, because mister
Wright may be looking at my posts. So you know,
I don't want the guy thinking what kind of weird
I was out there picking up acorns like I don't.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
Know, and she's not going to need me. Look at her.
She got her power tools going on. Remember that you're
Nancy Caven. We had our face done last year, and
Nancy Caven she was blowing the leaves because I was
out there with the baby right.
Speaker 2 (13:26):
Oh my god, I forgot that.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
A year already.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
You know what. Times guys were having fun and we're
having a blast. Okay, it's time to get into the episode.
Let's start with the question of the day, my favorite time.
Are you ready, Susan, Let's do it. Here we go.
Since we've discussed settling in a relationship, our listeners are
(13:54):
curious on how you draw the line between compromise and
settling in a relationship. Ship. So what does compromise look
like in a relationship and can compromise turn into settling? Okay,
so you and I actually we have talked about this, yes,
and the the there is a difference I think between
(14:17):
the compromise to.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
Me, compromises something smaller like settling is something that you
just knew, which is one of your red flags, and
you're going to go be okay with it. That would
be settling for me.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
Well, I think I think compromise is is a healthy,
good choice. Compromising could be something like I don't want
to go for Chinese food. I want to go to
a steakhouse. Well, I, and your partner says something else.
I think those are compromises. I think settling has to
(14:51):
do with a compromise, compromising your own moral compass or
your value system. So it gets a little confusing when
you use that terminology. But settling is for me is
when I have been in a relationship and I know
it's not the relationship for me. I know that I'm
(15:11):
making decisions that don't sit well in my heart, in
my spirit, and I've sort of forced myself to do it.
Going to a steakhouse instead of a Chinese restaurant, to me,
is a compromise, and good relationships make those compromises.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Kathy, what do you feel could compromises turn into settling
in a relationship?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Oh? Well, for me again, at our age, it's a
little bit different. But for me, I'll give you a
very big example for me and people in our age
talk about this all the time. Moving if you find
mister Wright, are you willing to move? So to me,
if I want to be with the man, it is
(16:00):
a compromise. It would be a compromise for me to
not see my grandchildren and my kids every week. But
I would be willing to compromise because I want to
be with the man I'm in love with. That to
me would be a compromise. Settling would be this guy
wants to move to you know, East Overshoe, and I'm
going to see my kids once a year. Then I'm
(16:22):
settling because I know in my heart that I want
to see my kids and my grandkids more. But I'm
afraid of losing this guy. I'm afraid that there won't
be another opportunity. So I say, okay, and I move
to East Overshoe, which is, you know, four thousand miles
around the globe. And I'm miserable I settled.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
Probably regret it.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
Oh, I think, I Well, for me, you know what
about you? I mean to be yes, I can't settle,
so I don't me.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
Settling is like say you have a picture of what
the person should be like, okay, in his qualities, and
you're going to settle for less because you don't want
to be alone like that is not.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
See okay, this is where you and I are going
to disagree. No, unless you are, you know, Frederick, notwithstanding,
I don't think there is a person out there for
either of us that meets everything. No, absolutely not. Well
you you just said if he doesn't have to, then
you're settling.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
And my list has changed over the years as we
both talked about it many times, because we're not looking
for the same things anymore. Correct. So what I mean
by this is like, for instance, somebody that's rude to
the waitress or the waiter, and you're going to settle
and say I'm okay with that as long as he
says he's going to stop doing it. That's something that's
(17:47):
never going to change, and you will end up resenting
him for it.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
That's just as I don't, I don't, I mean, I
hear you. To me, those aren't settling issues. That that's
a character flaw that maybe was he just had a
bad night. No, just maybe had a bad night in
a restaurant. I mean to me, settling are the really
big issues of life here for me would be settling. Listen,
(18:15):
he says, you know, my my, I'm making these things up.
You know, my daughter lives in London and we're gonna
have to spend every Christmas in London. That's not a compromise.
That is settling. That is a big that's not healthy
for my brain, for my family, for my own well being.
And I think that's what it comes down to. For me.
(18:36):
Settling is when you have that icky feeling that this guy.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Isn't there that you want, yeah, feeling.
Speaker 2 (18:46):
There's oh, I don't know. There's always going to be
things in a relationship that could be improved. But I
think for me it's so clear. I don't know if
I'm articulating it well, but for me, settling is doing something,
is having a relationship with someone that goes against my
(19:07):
inner grain. My spirituality is something that I know that
I should be doing this, but I'm doing it.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
And let me let me put a car, for instance,
I want a car that has this heated steering wheel, Well,
I'll settle for this car even though it doesn't have it.
Like that kind of thing. When it comes to a relationship,
that's a whole other world. It's a relationship. It's something
that you will live to regret if you.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Have you settled in relationships before.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
I don't believe so, oh I've compromised.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Oh I have definitely settled, not long term, because that's
why I but that's why it doesn't. That's why it doesn't.
But anyway, I think that I think people mistake they
mix up the two terms because I could see how Yeah, yeah,
for everyone out there who doesn't who's in a relationship,
(20:03):
who doesn't think you will be compromising, You're going to
make a lot of compromises in your relationship. You're going
to make a lot of sacrifices to.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Make the relationship work. You can't be right all the time.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Right and right. And that's why I'm saying it's it's
it's those really deep, uh guiding force that when you
go against it, then you know you're settling. And it's
that feeling like you just try to push it away
and and and say it's not the part you know
it is, so you know a waight or being rude
to a way to that to me is not that's
(20:37):
not a settling issue that.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
But if that was his trait, that he does it
all the time, that would be something that yeah, both
of you and I both know that we would never
tolerate it. We would never agree that that's okay.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
But yeah, well you know anyway, it's listen. I'd have
to have the relationship to talk about compromise or settling.
So I mean, I would ask you one thing and
you don't have to answer it. What is the biggest
compromise you've made with Frederick so far? Because you've told
me you're not settling, So what's the biggest compromise you've made?
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Being okay with him not being as neat as I am?
Speaker 2 (21:15):
That's the biggest COMPROMI Cath, you know me, that's true.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
Huge. All right, let's get into our fan questions for today.
Speaker 2 (21:24):
Frederick get it cleaned up while she's working there to
get that house ship shape. All right, I'm going.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
To start us off, and this is from anonymous Kathy
and Susan. I really need your advice. I've always struggled
with my relationship with my sister in law. When my
husband and I first started dating in college, she and
I weren't around each other much for the first two years.
They barely acknowledged me, and when they finally did, it
(21:52):
often felt like they were poking fun at me. Last fall,
four days after my husband and I got engaged, she
announced she was three weeks pregnant. To make matters worse,
she shared the news at a family dinner that she
had intentionally not included me in Ooh, it felt like
(22:12):
our engagement had been completely overshadowed, and I spiraled. When
my mother in law heard we were upset, she made
us come over to talk. She revealed my sister in
law had admitted she was getting close to me on purpose. Oh,
she wasn't getting close to me on purpose. Excuse me,
(22:35):
My l pressured me. Mother in law pressured me into
confronting her. So I did, honestly and with an open heart.
But instead of apologizing, my sister in law dismissed everything,
made excuses, and told me never to bring it up again.
Not long after my mom scheduled my bridal shower. Three
(22:56):
months before my bridal shower, my mother in law told
me the only weekends she'd like for my sister in
law's baby shower were either the day after my shower
or four days before. I begged her not to schedule
it in the same weekend. Unsurprisingly, most of their skip
(23:16):
Most of them skipped my shower. My sister in law's
baby shower was four days before mine, and she had
a second one the day after mine. By this point
I had been in therapy for months trying to learn
how to best handle their family. Things escalated again when
it came to choosing our bridal party. My husband and
(23:37):
my mother in law initially agreed it would be easiest
if his sister and her husband weren't in the wedding.
I was completely fine with this decision given the history,
but when we told them, it turned into a yelling match.
My sister in law actually said a wedding is an important,
a baby is important. Months later, my mother in law
(24:01):
took me estate sailing and broke down crying about how
devastated she was that they weren't in the wedding. At
that point I caved. I was exhausted from fighting and
just gave in. So they ended up being in the wedding.
After all, Our wedding day itself was beautiful, but their
lack of consideration was obvious. They left early and didn't
(24:25):
even bother to give us a card let, alone a gift.
After everything, it felt like one final reminder of how
selfish they are. I need to get past this as
they are my husband's family. But wow, is that tough?
How would you handle things going forward? Love you both? Woa,
(24:47):
they're bitches.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
You know what? I think this might have been my
sister in law. Oh my, I think this is it's
my sister in law reincarnated.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Well wait, I knew you were going to was something.
But your sister in law too.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
There were two, There were twins. One is the sweetest
one known to man. The other one is from hell.
She rides on a broom. Well, let's not let's not
talk about her, you know, let's just have positive hair. Okay,
here's what I think. I think a couple of things.
The husband. First of all, their their behavior anonymous is
(25:24):
just ridiculous. It's it's intolerable, it is disgraceful, it is rude,
it's unkind. I can you know. I can give you
enough abjectives to fill the hour here. But your husband
and your mother in law agreed that they shouldn't be
in the wedding. And I'm sorry that you quote unquote
(25:45):
caved because you could have just left it alone and
said I'm sorry, you know, your mom, your brother, We
all agreed and pushed it off on her family. You
didn't do that, and I understand, and the moment it
was probably difficult. You're when she says, your sister in
(26:05):
law says babies are important, weddings aren't. I mean that
tells you everything right there. But I'll bet you one thing.
I bet her wedding was important.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
So here's the dare she say?
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Yeah? But here's the thing you But here's the thing.
They're not nice people. You can spend the rest of
your life, Anonymous, getting even, or you and your husband
can have a serious talk about building your own family
when you have children and seeing your in laws, sister
(26:36):
in law, mother in law when it is convenient. And
I'm sorry to say this, but I say it from experience.
Anonymous put away the idea of the Norman Rockwell family
Sunday gatherings kumbayah. It's probably never going to happen. So
(26:59):
you know, be polite, always be polite.
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Yes, what do you think? Obviously there's two choices here,
like for them not even to leave a card or
a gift of any sort. To do the same thing
to her is not something I recommend.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
She's already married, already married, she's already.
Speaker 1 (27:18):
Saying about the baby gifts. You know what I'm saying
as far as your mother in law is concerned, I mean,
really to start having a hissy fit because they're not
in the wedding and then you do this, well.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
No, no, no change.
Speaker 1 (27:32):
The mother in law be this way.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Yes, but the mother in law and son her husband
agreed for them, not for her not to be in
the wedding. I think it's just as you know the
old in the Old Country. This is a mission us
and you're not going to fix it.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
So how about when they were talking Kathy about please
don't have it the same week as my baby shower,
I mean my wedding shower, and then they did it
four days before. That's just rude. And half the people
didn't go to the second one.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
Yeah, so didn't come to the wedding shower. So so
what you know, focus on the marriage with your husband.
You know, I have a friend in California who I
have this conversation with who has trouble with her mother
in law, similar kind of situation. From you know, she
seems to have the most fabulous husband and she has
a fabulous child. And focus on your family. That's what
(28:27):
I wish I had done more of and just seeing
the mother in law when I had to seeing.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
The But you know that's stung until you did.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
And that's what I'm saying, Anonymous, learn what took me
many years. Be polite. Don't invite them on vacation, invite
them for uh dinner? They can't come, Oh dear, I'm suys,
So maybe another time. Always be aboud.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
I wouldn't all for dinner, No freaking way for her.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
You know why I would because I love.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
She'd probably cancel.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
That's okay. I love my husband, and if it was
important to my husband, I would do it. I didn't
say I would do it. I would say I would invite,
and then when they say no, thank you, I'd look
at my husband and say, I love you so much.
I'm glad we're a family.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
And how about when does sister in law admit it
that she wasn't getting close to her own purpose?
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Anonymous, they're not nice people. Get over it. You have
a lovely husband, Get over the fact that your sister
in law seems to be a selfish bitch. Your mother
in law seems to be totally invested in her daughter.
Get over it. So I'm sorry. I don't mean to
sound hard. I'm giving you the advice Anonymous that I
(29:52):
wished I had taken my own marriage because my mother
in law was brutal and my and my father in
law and it was it really did cause issues for
my husband and myself and I had a great husband,
so I do. I always used to say to my husband,
like did a pity you know? Did you get dropped
by the stork? Like where did you come from?
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Because you exchange gifts at Christmas? Getter an ugly Christmas Sweatery.
Speaker 2 (30:19):
Okay, we're moving on, we're anonymously.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
I feel your pain. I'm honest to God, and I
know from Kathy's experience it's not easy. And it's easy
for us to say, just go about your life, worry
about you and your husband. But it does sting. We're
not going to excuse.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
That, right. It does sting, but it's not going to change.
So don't spend spend your effort making your marriage good,
making your husband happy, building your relationship. When you guys
have children, build your family, because ultimately that is what's
going to matter in your life. And let us know, Anonymous,
how things go. And by the way, congrats on your wedding. Okay,
(30:59):
let's move on to question two from another anonymous writer
and Jesse. Y'all know, don't ever feel like you have
to put your name in when you send us questions.
Were going to answer them whether you put your name
down or not. So good good for you for writing this. Hi, ladies,
(31:23):
I'm wondering what your take is on couples being together
for a long time before they get engaged. I've been
with my boyfriend for three years and we're in our
mid twenties. We're already getting the quote when you're getting
engaged questions, and they're getting more and more and more
frequent from friends and family. My boyfriend and I have
talked about marriage. We're confident we are each other's endgame.
(31:46):
My boyfriend is holding off on marriage due to money,
you know, wedding costs, figuring out where we want to
settle down, and then buying a house, et cetera. For me,
not only do I agree with those reasons, I also
just don't feel ready to get get married. It almost
feels like I'm too young, even though I'm really not.
So I know where I stand in my relationship. But
(32:08):
my question is this Why do people view it as
such a red flag if you are together for a
long time before getting married, should I be concerned that
we don't feel ready yet? I guess I'm just looking
for an outside perspective to help me feel more confident
in how I feel. Thanks, ladies, what do you think?
Speaker 1 (32:25):
Literally not? You do it when you're ready. Don't let
other people influence you one way or the other. I
think it's just old school. You know, you're together so
many years, the next thing in line is the engagement,
and the next thing is the marriage, and then the
next thing is you have a baby. Not You don't
have to necessarily follow that rule. You do you? But
(32:50):
when she says I don't feel ready to get married,
like it's her age that she said, it's almost like
I feel too young, even though I'm not. She's good
in her relationship. But let me ask this, and Kathy,
I want your opinion. If you're with somebody three years
(33:10):
and do you not know what is I'm too young
to get married me?
Speaker 2 (33:19):
Well, they're in their mid twenties and these are all
judgment calls. I think getting married in your mid twenties
is about as early, especially in this world in this
day and time that you want to get married. But
who am I like, I'm not a judge jury here.
I mean my daughter dated a guy three years and
didn't end up marrying. I don't think there's yeah, there's no,
(33:42):
there's no. I think Anonymous. I think Susan's right. People
just tend to go with tradition. They tend to go
with historically people date get married to all those things.
But I do want to say one thing too, Anonymous.
Your boyfriend, you said, is holding off on marriage due
(34:05):
to the wedding costs where you want to settle down
by a house. Let me just tell you those things
are fluid in life. You may buy six houses, you
may move to four different cities. You may decide on
a huge wedding, you may decide to elope, you may
decide you're not ready to have children for five years,
(34:26):
ten years. These are things that change over time. And
so what I don't hear you saying is that your husband, sorry,
your boyfriend, is not ready because of the costs and
those decisions, and you feel like you're too young. So
what I'm hearing is a good relationship where you two
(34:50):
enjoy each other. I'm assuming you both work. You know
where you stand in your relationship and you're comfortable with that,
and you know what that is a sign of charity.
You know what you want today. You don't have to
be looking ten years down the road. But I would
encourage you and your boyfriend to talk about the fact
(35:10):
that you know, is the time ever perfect? I assure
you it's never perfect time to have children. You know,
the house you buy. A year after you buy it,
you make it transferred for work, So be a.
Speaker 1 (35:22):
Little more kathy. What about to say, well, let's just
do us and then when we're twenty nine or thirty,
we'll revisit the marriage thing. Do we still feel like?
I mean, what is the wedding? The marriage you commit
to one another or you're legally binding because of a
piece of paper and marriage. I don't think they're really
(35:42):
sure yet. I don't think they're there yet.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
I don't listen, lots of people have children and they're
not married. Lots of people live together not married, absolutly
lots of people. Define what works for you, Anonymous, define
you and your boyfriend define the relationship that works for you,
and and revel in it, enjoy what you have together
and don't worry so much about the future, you.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Know, well, pleas pertay these comments, Kathy, like she's saying,
why do they always view it as it?
Speaker 2 (36:10):
Right?
Speaker 1 (36:11):
Well, it's when are you going to get married? Just
say someday, someday ready.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
You know, you know you don't even have to say that,
say I'm If your friends are married and Anonymous, you
can say them, I'm so glad you're married and you
have the life you want. Whatever. Your boyfriend, let's call
them Johnny. Johnny and I right now are living our
best lives. We're in this great chapter of our life
and we're so happy. And you know, life gives us
all lots of chapters, and we're in this one right
(36:38):
now and we're having fun and let it go exactly.
And I'm happy that you found happiness because ultimately, Anonymous,
finding love and happiness is the most important thing in life.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
It is. And just do you and enjoy this time
with him?
Speaker 2 (36:52):
Yeah, all right, but let us know, Wait, Susan, you're
losing your touch. I can't believe you didn't make an advertisement.
If they do decide to get married, that you're a
wedding Officiacy.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Well, she's not ready yet.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Okay, well when you do. If you do, Susan, we'll
be available. I can appciate and I'll come throw rose pedals.
All right, we're going to move in to I love this.
We're going to do another Golden Spotlight, and this one
is all about technology. Boy, Okay, let's talk. I mean you,
I don't know about you. I was born with black
(37:25):
and white television. Let's just start with that. When my
kids were young. Yeah, I mean when my kids were young,
we didn't have computers. My first phone was like a suitcase.
I remember the first computer I got my kids. It
was a Macintosh Apple. The thing was just huge. Why
do you think, I mean, I know what I think.
(37:45):
Why do you think Golden struggles so much with technology.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
Because they're not used to it. They weren't taught it
in school. When you do it every day it's a
part of life, then you learn it better. I just
know with my A, my my chat, she he's like
my best friend.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
Okay, yeah, but you know that bothers me that you
use that. Let me just you you went straight to AI.
You know. AI has some great uses, but it.
Speaker 1 (38:14):
Does for it keeps me from having the Google research.
I just asked him if he goes and looks.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
Yeah, But see that's lazy, Susan, you're being a lot.
Speaker 1 (38:22):
I don't there's not enough time in the day. Some
days when you want some information, do you not ask
Alexa something like Alexa, what's the weather today?
Speaker 2 (38:30):
No?
Speaker 1 (38:31):
I don't ever ask her what the weather.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
I don't ask Alexa what times? You know? I use
Alexa tron on my music, and I use Alexa set
a timer when I'm baking.
Speaker 1 (38:39):
Before I open my eyes and I'm laying in bed.
I want enough time, and I don't want to look
at a phone or any lights. So I say, Alexa,
what time is it?
Speaker 2 (38:48):
Okay? But that's then Chap gbt write me a letter
to my landlord. So I mean, I just think it's
well worded.
Speaker 1 (38:58):
You wouldn't understand that because you were in English. I
mean I get that.
Speaker 2 (39:02):
Oh well, all right, back to the tell technology that
I think. I think goldens. Uh right. We did grow up.
I know myself. I challenge myself to try to learn things,
and sometimes I failed late. And but once someone I
do want to learn, like I want to learn how
to do as uh, I'll get somebody teach me how
(39:26):
to do it, or I'll research it, like I'll do
a YouTube video. But I think goldens are you know,
they grew up on freaking rotary phones, and you know
what the young people are listening is going, what the
hell is a rotary phone? However, I think I think technology.
I don't know if you if you heard about this,
but families today, thank god my children are grown, because
(39:51):
you know, giving kids smartphones when they're six. I don't
subscribe to it, but a lot of families are going
back to landlines and giving their kids, like, you know,
a phone and a phone number. Yeah, go ahead and
talk to your friends because they don't want them being
being uh involved. Also social media, you know, that's that's
(40:11):
my that's right. And technology is social media. It's a
I I have found doing videos for me. Uh it's
not as intuitive, That's what I would say younger kids,
because they grew up on it. It's intuitive. You know,
click on this highlight post, click, just clicking pieces and
(40:32):
and to me, that's not as intuitive. But I get it.
People say to me, Kathy, how can you write that
so well? I don't know. It's I've done it so long.
It's intuitive. It's just what we grew up with. However,
I think a lot of people our age. My sister
is one for I mean she just told me yesterday
her she has an iPhone six and she has to
(40:55):
get rid of it because it's not being supported anymore.
Speaker 1 (40:57):
I mean she used it updated.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
Yeah, she to call people. I mean she. I take
pride in being twenty nine as I am and learning
new technology all the time. But I don't think people
Golden's necessarily want to how many how many people were
on at before you and I went on the show
because of my job that.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
I hadn't understand Instagram?
Speaker 2 (41:21):
I know, okay, I was on Instagram. I was one
of the first. Uh, I had it when it used
to be and Twitter now my space x when it
was one hundred and forty characters, like from the beginning
of time. But you have to want I think you
have to have a curious mind.
Speaker 1 (41:39):
It does it hard to learn? Yeah? Yeah? And I
stand it. Yeah, And I think that, Well, do you
remember your my grandmother, I'm sure yours when we had
cell phones or a computer and she's like, oh my god,
what is the world coming to?
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Like what does that do?
Speaker 1 (41:56):
They had encyclopedias that we look up things. You know
what I mean.
Speaker 2 (42:00):
I mean, yeah, today, I will say I love for
me all being able to research things online and so
go down rabbit, you know, type in something on my
computer and and you can be like you said, type
that's right there, typewriter. Yeah, but I'm saying I love that.
I love learning new technology. I'm not as good as
(42:22):
I would like to be, but I actually like it.
I will tell you I don't think this affects Golden's
as much, but it's my PSA for the day. My
biggest problem with social media, and it just gets more
with with TikTok and all the different social media platforms.
(42:43):
Young people today do not They first of all, spend
too much time in technology. They're just glued to their phones.
But they also think that everything they see on well
that it's that it's everyone's complete life. And I always say,
back when I was an educational consultant, the world that
(43:03):
we see that people post on Instagram, on TikTok, on
any social media is the lives they want. It's the
lives they want to portray that they're living that kind
of life twenty four to seven, and they're not. And
so I think that is a problem, which it.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Is part of the new age, if you will. Because
me being in hairdressing and I used to give out
a free makeover, color cut, a whole new look makeup,
and that would sell me. People would say, who did.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
Now you could just do it, you could just google
it how to do it.
Speaker 1 (43:37):
Well, no, because now you have to advertise for yourself,
your bolliage. You got to take pictures of every client.
I worked on a thirty minute book. And then when
you're taking pictures, unless you hire a photographer to come
into salon with you, you have to sell yourself out there
on social media for hair just because.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
But see, in some ways, I think that's great. It's
I mean, there's two sides of it. The good side
of the coin is the tech boom has made its connection.
It's made connection to careers, to jobs, to people to
opportunities so much more prevalent. And that's fabulous. I love
that part of it. I don't like the part that
(44:18):
people spend too much time, including Golden's, on technology and
not development.
Speaker 1 (44:24):
We take so much time sometimes because it takes us
a long time to figure it out.
Speaker 2 (44:27):
Kauz, Yeah, well, yeah, I'm better than most. I actually though,
could you give up your phone? Could you give up
no physiastic chat GBT to write our next letter for
I'm going to get you off that.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
I love that, I love it all right. We can
just talk about this for hours, you know that, right always?
And that was fun And I wanted to thank all
of our listeners for joining us today. We really enjoy
talking with you, sharing our ideas with you, and love
when you tell us things.
Speaker 2 (44:59):
Yeah, we we really enjoyed. Be sure to follow us
Batchelor Happy Hour. We have new episodes coming out every week.
You don't want to miss even one.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
Not at well, and make sure you submit your questions
to us, and you remember how to do that. Go
to bachelornation dot com, slash Golden Hour, or dm us
on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 2 (45:20):
Yeah, please do that. Take a minute to use your
technology to reach out to us. That's what we want.
But in the meantime, listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden
Hour on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to
your podcasts. Until next time, have a great week.
Speaker 1 (45:34):
Thank you,
Hosts And Creators
Joe Amabile
Susan Noles
Serena Pitt
Kathy Swarts
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