May 7, 2025 • 37 mins
Today on “Golden Hour,” we’re back answering more of your questions! We kick off the episode with the question of the day: How important is it to live near your significant other when dating in your Golden years? Then, we dive into your questions! Are age gaps the kiss of the death for all relationships? How do you find community like Kathy and Susan when you’re their age? And is there any way to elevate the mother of the bride look at your daughter’s wedding? You asked and we’re here to help! Everyone needs a little nudge to trust themselves and get out there. Tune in now to hear all this and more and be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Welcome back to about to our happy hours, Golden Hour.
Thanks for joining us today. We are as always excited
to be here and share some time with you.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
How are you doing today, Susan?
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Pretty good? Pretty good, waiting on the pins and the
plates going to be put in my arm here?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
But can I just say, can I just say little
known fact here? Two years ago I broke my wrist
exactly in the same way that Susan.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Why do I need to copy you? Why?
Speaker 2 (00:35):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
I was very foolish. We fell the same way. When
she called me, I was like, oh, let me tell
you what's coming your way? So God, but you know what,
She's good, She's gonna be fine. She's good to be fine.
Your wrist will be as good.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
No cartwheels for a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You know, and no understand.
Speaker 3 (00:53):
We're here to answer more of our fan questions, So guys,
make sure you keep submitting those. We love reading them,
and we definitely love hearing back from you to see
how things wait. You know what to do, Just go
to Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour and submit away,
because we're here to receive them and talk about them.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
And let me just say, since Susan can't do much,
she really wants to read your questions and contemplate her answers.
So please do us all a favor and send and
you know what. You can send us your questions, your updates,
send it to all of us. You'll be doing Susan
a favor. You can also DM us on Instagram at
Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
All right, okay, you ready, Kat, it's time.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
I'll get into the episode.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
And we're going to start with the question of the
day a day. Okay, when dating in your golden years,
how important is it that you live in the same
city or what about the same state? How important is
that when at our age? I mean it's more convenient, I'll.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
Say, uh, you know, I think it depends. I think
it depends on how you meet the person. If you
if you establish a relationship and you then are living
for like, say somebody's in town and you spend three
or four days with them, and you're like, oh, I'd
(02:24):
like to continue dating. I think long distance can work,
but I think it's tough. It's more difficult, it's more expensive.
I don't know many relationships. You know, we've interviewed some
young guys and women from the Bachelor series on our
(02:47):
podcast who have said it's an issue. I think it
is potentially an issue to get to the finish line.
And by the finish line, I don't mean marriage. I
just mean to solidify your relationship. I think it's hard.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
When you're for you, I'm asking you how important it
is is it that he lives in the same state
as you, or.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
It's not important in the beginning. In the beginning, yes,
it would not be It would not be hard as
long as I could fly there. And let's be clear
when I say as long as I could fly there,
as long as he's flying me there, I see. But yeah,
but but but I want I want more than just dating.
(03:31):
So when you're asking me specifically, you know, I don't
want to just date a guy in Seattle, you know,
and see him, you know, one weekend a month. That's
not what I'm looking for. I think it is. It's
more difficult. I got to tell you, though. I know
a guy who said to me that if you're with
(03:55):
a guy, you know, if you're dating him or a
serious relationship, you need to move where he is. He said,
women need to move where the men, where the man
is I don't know. I just tell you that's what
he said.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Well, I don't think who has the better area.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Well, I said to him similar. I said, well, wait
a minute. You know you've got a great job whatever
you're doing, whatever he does. And I said, let's just
pretend I'm a trial attorney and I'm very successful and
I'm only licensed in my state. You well, then he folded.
Then he said, well, if that were the case, then
(04:32):
I would make it a priority to come to see you.
And I said, okay, so I think it's more difficult.
I think you can date long distance, but if you're
asking me specifically, I want to see a guy more often.
So if I really like a guy, I'm going to go.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
I mean it would be important. I think it's easier,
way easier to see each other, to have a relationship.
But like you said, it can be done.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Would you move, Susan, not generally, would you move to
be with the guy you're dating.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Yes, as long as I can come back and see
my family when I want. Yes.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I think at our age, you know, I think this
is hard hard. I think it is difficult for people
who are younger. Maybe listening to our podcast and We're
so glad you are. But at our age you have
to understand.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
That not all in the same city. Cap there's nobody
left here.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Well, that's for you. I have two children here and
two grandchildren.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Now I met men, it's a date.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Oh yeah, well there's that.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
We take them wherever we meet them.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
Yeah, but I'm just saying, our life now is an adventure.
And if I meet a guy that I'm interested in,
he's interested in me, and he says, hey, you know,
make it, come on out here and spend a couple
of weeks in me, I'm gone. I'm going And if
that goes well, then I'm going to spend more time
out there, or he's going to come see me more.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
You know, that's what I'm going to do.
Speaker 3 (06:02):
Yeah, it's fine, but I said, the only thing is
it's a little easier when they're local. But it's not
an end all. You know, if they're not, you make it.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Could you do it? But wait?
Speaker 1 (06:13):
How long could you date long distance? Because for me,
there'd be an expiration.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Date before you moved in with one another, you mean.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Before we committed to each other in a way that
one of us we were either spending you know, much
of the time together. It would depend on moved in,
who's retired and who's not.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Well at our age typically.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Typically, but if you date younger, they're still working so well.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
But see, that's really easy.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
If I were dating a younger man, which I'm happy
to do, by the way, and he's working, I'm going
there because I'm not working right right, that's a no
break or can work.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
Like I said, it's just easier if he's around here.
But it's not a deal breaker.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Just do you think it's harder for younger people.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Maybe because younger people have full time positions, you know,
they have to be they can only do a weekend
and if it's far, if it's on the other side
like California or wherever, that's a long flight to do
for a weekend.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah, some of our younger Bachelor Nation couples, I look
at them, one or both of them.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
You know, they're influencers. They're not tied to a desk.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Or cat from home.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
They can work from so they can travel around and
do what they do. But I think for younger people
who are building a career, if they're not working remote,
it's tough.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
It is. So it's all this.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Conversation to say that you have found me the guy
that wants to date me long distance.
Speaker 3 (07:51):
Give me time, Kath, I'm working on.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
It, all right, all right, all right, we're going to
get into our fan questions here.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
I'm going to read the first one.
Speaker 1 (07:59):
Let's go, Kyla, writes Susan and Kathy, you seem like
so much fun and a friend that everyone.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Would like to have.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Well, thank you, Kyla, we are, but we want you
to be our friend too. Kyla, Okay, if I ever
had the opportunity to meet you, I would talk to
you about so many things. I guess my question would be,
how do I build strong connections and a community around
me like you have with Kathy and the other relationships
(08:27):
you have built. Well, since she's directing it, you go, Susan,
what are you okay?
Speaker 3 (08:31):
Well, for starters, you need to be locked in a mansion,
no phones, weeks at a time with no phones and
no contact with the outside world, and you get to
know each other. I think it's more difficult out in
the real world. But you start with a friendship, somebody
(08:51):
that you enjoy, their company, that makes you feel good
to be around them, and you make them feel good.
Whether it's a joke or just being a positive person.
People like being around us.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
I think, Susan, yes, but you and I also, you know,
everyone thinks we just laugh and giggle all the time,
which we do, but both of us have our issues
with each other. Ride you know she does, I will say,
and I'm there for her. But I will say I
think part of building a strong friendship is listening to
(09:27):
the other person judging the other person, which something I've
had to work on hard in my life.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
So how do you break the rules? And Kathy's not
a rule breaker?
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Wait, excuse me, Bachelor Nation, Susan doesn't break the rules.
Susan shatters the rules and she leaves shattered glass everywhere
she goes and people have to dodge.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
You would like us. I hope you do get to
meet us someday because we're fun. We are, and we
have a serious side that we really do.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
But I would say, Kyla, you know, in the activities
that you're in, however, you meet people whoever it is right,
the friends you have, spend the time listening to them,
asking them it's just like dating in a way.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
And don't asking them to do with you as well?
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Yeah, but asking them about themselves. It's like dating, right,
find out about them.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
Ask too many questions, but be interested in what they come.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
I think people, yes, but I think people want to
feel heard and understood, and whether you're dating or a friend,
and so you need to I mean, I everyone knows Kathy.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Assay, and some days I'll say, Kathy, no more questions,
Let's just talk about life, right.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
But I do ask a lot of questions because that's
how I integrate whatever into my brain is by asking questions.
So I would encourage you, Kyla, the people that you're
friends with, spend time finding out what makes them tick
and what you guys have in common and what you
don't have in common, because that's what builds friendships. Not
(11:11):
it's not you don't want to clone friendships. I'm going
to be exactly like you.
Speaker 3 (11:15):
No, no, And you want to do fun things together,
things that make you smile. You know, maybe somebody likes
comedy and you like comedy. You go or hear music,
live music, It doesn't matter, but that's how you and
then that person, when they enjoy your company, is going
to tell the next person, right, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Like that's and Kylie, if I'm being really honest. The
reason Susan and I are such good friends. She does
a hell of a job cutting my hair and looking
for her and cooking.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
But here's babbling on bait cases.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
What? All right, here's the deal. Her broken wrist is
really cramping my style right now, so I'm gonna have
to get my hair cut somewhere.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
I got order out again.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
Oh and that's just thank you. That's just business as
usual for me, all right.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
You know what, Just be you, be real, and people
will know you're good people.
Speaker 2 (12:10):
Yep, I agree.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Okay, Kathy, Ready for the next one. This one's from Michelle. Hi,
Kathy and Susan. I so loved listening to you ladies
on my way to work. My daughter is getting married
this fall and we are all so excited. However, I
am so stressed out on what to wear. I don't
even know where to start. I am sixty two and
(12:39):
my younger years I could whip an outfit together and
feel fabulous, but not anymore. I don't want a typical
mother of the bride. Look, I don't blame you. My
body has changed so much and just want to feel good.
Where do I shop? This one probably is for Susan.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Loll excuse me or excuse me, Michelle.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
I would like to tell you exactly where to shop,
but I'm going to defer to Susan. In Susan's closet
with the money for the Okay, wait, I think wait,
I actually can take a stab at this because she's
more like me than you. Right, So Susan is a
great shopper, Michelle. But let me tell you Susan's how
(13:22):
and other Nancy, other people have helped me learn how
to shop. Here's what. The first thing you do, you
decide what styles. You're gonna be so proud of me, Susan.
You decide what looks good on you, what colors look
good on you, what styles and shapes you know, what
what yeah of what colors, and what profile looks good
on you?
Speaker 2 (13:42):
And you start with that.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Then get online and go to different department stores and
and just scroll looking at those profiles that you think look.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Good at.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
This is what I make her do. Sometimes I don't
like doing it. My God, I'll be here for for go.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
I hate it. I hate it. I'm just trying to
hate it.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Because here's the thing, Michelle, I'm right with you, I
say to Susan all the time, I don't know what
looks good. I mean, I have to try it on,
like and Susan's.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Like, no, no, certain styles I already know. But you're
You're right, Kathy. You do need to put something on
something sometimes that you don't think is all that, and
you put it on it looks or quite the opposite. Wow,
look at that, and you put it on the Oh,
dear God, take it off.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
Just take it off, get it off, Okay, So give
her some advice, because that's my advice is You've taught
me to go online look at profiles and styles and
colors that I like. And it's still hard, Michelle, because
you know then it's like do I order A four,
A six or an eight because I've worn all three
sizes And there's that issue too, And it.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Depends on your body shape. What is going to look
best on you. I mean, there are people out there
you could actually hire your stylist to dress WSMS. I
know they always have stylists that you go ask the professional,
and so does Niman Marcus. But when I tell you
I can shop.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
This Targart, wait, just Target, Walmart.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
And Nieman Marcus in the same day, it doesn't matter
to me, and I'll wear both garments at the same
time and it looks fabulous together. So it's not only
about how much you're spending. It's not.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Oh, it never is.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
And in fact, Marshalls. You can find things in Marshalls.
Now not for a wedding.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Maybe, yes you can, but I get overwhelmed. Here's the thing,
Michelle and I totally get you. You get overwhelmed Susan.
I have shopped with Susan so many times. We'll walk
into a store. Susan is like a buzzard. She just
go and tell you if she's said a turkey hawk
she sees and she just goes hoo and decides and
(15:49):
yanks stuff off the hanger.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
I'm pathy or I'll say nope, not here, let's go.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
But it's so it's difficult for people like us, Michelle,
you and I. It doesn't come naturally to us. But
you know I can go out and run six miles
and Susan can't. So we all have our strying.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
No, no, it's not that way, because she said back
when she was younger, she could whip together an outfit
really easy. I also, like I never would want to
look like when you google mother of the bride. Oh,
dear God. No, you can go to those dress stores
that are for proms and bob it's fuzz and you
(16:26):
know whatever. They they have so many different styles and
that's the person you say. Okay, I am looking I
am the mother of the bride. However, I don't want
to look like the mother of the bride. I want
to beat good. I want to feel good and it
will help you. Yeah, if not, I will write me
DM me.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
But I will say one other thing Susan has taught me,
which I hate trying on clothes.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
I really do hate shopping. I hate cooking and shopping.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
I don't know what guy wouldn't want me anyway, Susan
has talked me into trying on things to you, even
if I don't think, like if I like the colors,
something attracts me to it. But then I look at
oh no, this one look good on me. Susan will
always say try it, try it. And I have bought things.
One of the dresses I wore to a Bachelor Nation
(17:16):
function actually.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
The blackest shell.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
No, well that one too, but this was a sparkly
copper dress that I wouldn't have tried on in a
month of Sundays, and Susan said, no, try it on,
try to and I loved it and it looked great
on me, and I got so many compliments.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
So my mother said, you never know.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
My other suggestion, Michelle is take your if you have
a daughter, I take my daughter sometimes with me, take
a friend and say, help me pick out some things
to try on because it can be very overwhelming.
Speaker 3 (17:48):
Or DM me, what state do you live in?
Speaker 2 (17:50):
Love?
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Because I swear to God, Susan will shop for you.
She will do it. She with her broken wrist, she
will shop for you.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
I enjoy making people feel good about themselves. Say somebody's
really hippie, you know what I mean? Like wide on
the bottom, what is that a pear shape or something?
Then you're not going to get something that's so fitted
on the bottom and makes your top look invisible. You
want something to compliment an accent your good parts. And
(18:21):
you're right, Kathy. Sometimes color is an amazing, amazing change
in whatever it is. You feel good in it.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
But I don't know. I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
I'm with you, Michelle. It's brutal, but let us know.
Send us pictures yes, and congratulations. By the way, I'm
the upcoming wedding of your daughter. All right, here's the
next one from m okay, which, by the way, if
your name is Emily, my sister's name is Emily and
we called her m so I don't know. Maybe it's
my sister writing this in Hi, Kathy and Susan, I
(18:54):
love your podcast and advice. I was curious how much
of an age difference is too much. I am talking
to a guy who is twenty six and I am twenty.
Obviously that can be two very different stages of life,
although I live a life different from most twenty year
(19:15):
olds and have finished college and work full time. WHOA
do you think this is an issue? Or could it
work out? So far it has been going great, But
interested to see what you guys think.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Twenty and twenty six.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
He's six years older than she is, so well.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
Men when sure way slower than women. I was married
at twenty Susan, so I can't even imagine. I would
say to you, am you seem perceptive that you realize
that you could be at two different stages of life,
but you also seem responsible and mature because you have
finished college and you work full time at twenty. Most
(19:56):
twenty year olds are getting drunk on six straight and
partying and hardy, So you know, you don't seem like
a twenty year old.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
I don't think it's a big deal at all.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
Well, I think she said, do you think this is
an issue?
Speaker 3 (20:09):
Now?
Speaker 2 (20:09):
It could be an issue and could it work out?
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Absolutely? The only way you're going to know is keep
dating them, see how it goes.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
I mean, I'm wondering if she's wondering if he thinks
twenty is too young, you know what I mean? And
I'm sharing that that could be, but I wouldn't.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
I think I think she's insecure. It says like has
been going great.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Keep saying going great. Who cares? It's a number, it's.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
What no number? Your lips to God's ears, It's a number.
It can be a number and it can be real.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
I think that's fifty four and sixty eight.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
I don't know. Would you date someone fifty four?
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Yes? I would?
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Well, there you go, all right.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
So it's I think it's it's individal if it's working them,
you know what, God bless you. I'm so happy you
found your guy, and maybe he's not your permit forever guy.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Maybe he is. You're only going to know.
Speaker 3 (21:10):
That's a good point, Kathy, because you're twenty and he's
twenty six. I don't want to say the odds because,
like you, you got married at twenty and had a
wonderful marriage. I don't know that it's a forever person,
you know what I mean at that age because you
change and you're maturing in your twenties and in your thirties,
(21:33):
you're a little more level headed or settled about what
it is you want and what kind of life you
want with your partner. So right, but I wouldn't change
a thing. Just see what happens.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Yeah, I think you know what. Don't rush you down.
You're twenty. Enjoy the moment you're in, Enjoy the time
you guys have together.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
See where it goes.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
And by the way, you know at the top of
this podcast, am where we always say, right and let
us know we were talking to you and we're talking
to you.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Let us know how it goes.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
Thanks for sharing too, all right. The next one is
from Melissa Hi, Kathy and Susan. I loved the podcast
and wanted some advice about a friend of mine. In
March of this year, me and my four best friends
planned a girl's trip to Miami for four days. We
paid for the flights and the air b and B
(22:26):
Already a couple of weeks after we planned the trip,
one of my friends lost their mom suddenly. The four
of us have given her so much love and support
and are helping her get through this tough time. She
recently brought up not wanting to go on the trip
anymore because she doesn't want to burden us if she
(22:47):
suddenly became sad and won't have a safe place to
go if we're out and about. I told her that
we would be there for her no matter what, but
she budge and wants to be refunded for her part
of the airbnb. Should we try and help her come
on the girl's trip because it won't be the same
(23:09):
without her, or let her stay home and grieve her mom.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Can I say you don't get I love you, Melissa.
You sound like a wonderful group of ladies of girls.
You don't get to let her do anything. I am
talking as a woman who grieved the loss of her husband.
I've lost my mom in the last year and a half.
I lost my dad. You don't get to write the rules.
Speaker 2 (23:36):
Melissa.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I hate to tell you you have to let her
grieve any way she wants. Do you have to refund
the money? No? Is it the kind generous thing to do? Yeah,
all of you and your girlfriend should say to her,
you know what, we want you to come. We hope
you'll change your mind, but we will happily refund your money.
(24:01):
But work on her to come.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
But one of the things she says, I won't have
a safe place to go if I become sad. What
does that mean?
Speaker 1 (24:09):
It just means Susan grief is so it's not linear.
You don't know when you're gonna feel grief.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
How it's gonna be you. But well, that's what she's say.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Go back to the place.
Speaker 1 (24:23):
Maybe maybe she's a I don't know, we don't have
enough information. Maybe, but I know when my husband first died,
I would break down public in public places. I was embarrassed,
I felt.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
And you know now, I, as your friend, if that happened,
would leave the function and go be with you and
talk it out, get it at let you.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Yeah, but I'm saying in the moment, in the moment,
all you can think about is. I don't want other
people to see it. It's my private grief. I mean,
that's how I felt.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
You know.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
I can't speak for Melissa's friend, but I think in
this case you have to let her quote unk quote.
It is her life, it is her grief, it is
her journey through this grief.
Speaker 3 (25:05):
How long since? How long of us?
Speaker 1 (25:09):
She's just said lost their mom suddenly? So I'm guessing
it's recent because they just planned the trip.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
But I also agree with she says, should we try
and help her come on the girl's trip because it
won't be the same without her. I would share those
exact words, but we all care if you. If you
have a meltdown, we're here for you. Yes, you'll be
better in our company and cry it out. We're here
to hug you. It doesn't matter for us. We love you.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
Yes, But I one hundred percent agree with what you
just said, which is scary that I'm one hundred percent
agree with you.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
But it happens.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Don't hold your breath. It's not happening again for the
next ten minutes at least. But but do you agree
Susan that if that they have to, they have to
honor thought her journey through this grief is yes. But
but I'm with you, Susan.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
I sometimes you might feel guilty, like, oh god, I
don't want to ruin it. I'm just not happy. I
don't want to go, but sometimes it's the best thing
to do.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
But I mean, I can tell you I couldn't function.
I couldn't go anywhere. I didn't want people to see me.
I mean, I understand what she's saying.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
When your husband died. You mean, oh my god, I
can't imagine that. I couldn't and that's what happened. And yeah,
I mean I couldn't. And I'm guessing this mom was
real to young My mom just passed away a year
and a half ago, who I loved with all my heart.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
But she was ninety six. Not but and she was
ninety six. I'm guessing this young girl's trip. I'm guessing
this mom died suddenly at a younger age. And so
that is very not very if you're not prepared. So
you are a good friend.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Melissa's kind heart, but do try to encourage her, but
accept what she decides. And you know what, you guys
have to cough up a little more money, Yeah exactly,
But you know what. Regardless of what happens Melissa, whether
she comes or not, go have a good time. Celebrate
your friendships because, as Susan and I can tell you,
(27:16):
good friendships like that don't come at around that often.
So you know, pray for your friend if she doesn't come,
but go and enjoy your telling me to friends, because
that just doesn't come around that often.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
No, doesn't appreciate it. Okay, Cathy, it's king, it's my favorite.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Oh God, would you rather? Here?
Speaker 2 (27:44):
We go?
Speaker 3 (27:44):
We're gonna switch off reading the prompt and both say
which we'd rather do and why? Okay, I'm going to
start with would you rather have a passionate once in
a lifetime romance that heartbreak or a steady loving partnership
(28:05):
that lacks excitement?
Speaker 2 (28:08):
You answer that one.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
I don't like the one that says lax excitement because
what does that mean?
Speaker 2 (28:13):
You're not jumping out an airplane?
Speaker 3 (28:15):
You know, to choose?
Speaker 2 (28:16):
I mean I don't want to choose.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
Wait, Susan, we live in a democratic society. You and
I have free will. We don't have to we don't
have to pick. We can say we would rather have
a passionate once in a lifetime romance that last forever.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
And honestly a loving partnership.
Speaker 1 (28:42):
That Okay, wait, wait, I can make this work. Wait, Susan,
I can make this work. You and I. Here's how
it's going to work. You and I are each going
to find the man that we have a passionate once
in a lifetime romance that ends in heartbreak one day
(29:05):
before we die.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
Done. Got that one figured out. Moving on there, we
go to the next one.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
Would you rather suddenly lose all your cherished memories but
keep your personality intact? Or keep all your memories but
have your personality completely change?
Speaker 3 (29:30):
Oh that's a brainer.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
What's your answer?
Speaker 3 (29:33):
I want my personality to stay just like it is.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
Isn't that funny? I'm exactly the same. So you know
all the fire I don't know, Jesus, I'm gonna have
to get some vodka out here or something. Wait, can
I just say, you know all the fires that were recently,
all the devastations in California that gave me Honestly, first
(29:57):
of all, my heart went out to all the people
a I can't even imagine. But at a very superficial level,
I sat there thinking, Kathy, will you take you know
what I thought I didn't care about.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
Any of my stuff. Isn't that awful?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
I just care about my kids. I would take my
passport like I would have. I have all those papers together,
but in terms of things, I just don't care. No,
Just are you the same or no?
Speaker 3 (30:28):
Yes, I would just be me. I mean I would
be devastated, of course, but I don't want to change
who I am. Yeah, all right. Would you rather relive
your most embarrassing moment once a month for the rest
of your life or have a stranger randomly bring it
(30:51):
up in conversation once a year.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Oh that's easy. I'd have a random stranger bringing up
in conversation once year. I'd be drunk or high, and
I wouldn't give a sh shimped what they said. Did
That was easy?
Speaker 3 (31:05):
That was a real easy one.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
All right?
Speaker 3 (31:07):
Would you rather have all your text and emails from
the last twenty years leaked to the public or have
every thought, have every thought you've ever had about others
spoken out loud?
Speaker 2 (31:24):
You know what this question? I actually like.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
I don't like this game. It's a new second no game.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
No, well wait a minute, wait a minute, wait, there
is a lesson in this Please tell me what it is.
Here's a lesson when and I taught. When I taught
eighth grade speech and communications, I taught the kids this,
you can say whatever you want to say when you
put something in writing on the internet, in a text,
(31:52):
an email, it.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Lives on there going to get this on in perpetuting.
Speaker 1 (31:58):
They were like, purple, what I said, it means it
lives forever. Someone always has access to that. So be
careful what you're right, Be careful what you say. So
in my case, I would rather have all my texts
and emails because I'm very careful about what I write.
Speaker 3 (32:15):
And she's so perfect punctuations grammar.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
I was an English Oh it drives me nuts. Once
an object, I think I would subject.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Agree with you because I don't think I send emails like.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Every thought I've ever had, weight every thought I've ever had.
I would be locked up.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
Prison with no razors.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Yeah, some warm hair.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
And bushy eyebrows.
Speaker 1 (32:44):
Oh god, Susan, you know that would be Susan in prison.
Let me just say, Susan in prison would be saying
what day is the hair salon? What day do we
get our hair done? I need my nails down and
broken nail what day is the nail is the nail
tech coming? And I'd be like, and you know, I'd
be saying, can I please get out and run six miles?
It's true, That's exactly how it would be, all right, Okay.
Speaker 3 (33:09):
Would you rather discover that your entire family secretly hates
your parties or that they have a secret group chat
dedicated to discussing your love life?
Speaker 2 (33:22):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (33:22):
That case it for me, My entire family, my parties
because I don't have them.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
Don't come if you don't like them, don't be talking
about my love life.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Well, can I just tell you my kids have talked
about you when I have dated guys they have.
Speaker 3 (33:39):
Oh yeah, my son's good on my cake? Seriously you
went out with him, Christopher.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
We don't care. We're living our best life, all right.
Would you rather have your deepest Ooh? I like this one.
Would you rather have your deepest secret turned into a
best selling novel that everyone knows is about you, or
have a terrible rumor about you spread that you can
never prove his faults. Oh, I want the book because
I'm doing the book.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
Tour money on it.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
Embarrass me and bring it on it.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
No, I've asked the way.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
Wait, can I just tell you I've often said this,
this is true, and they're all dead, so they can't
say so my mother, I can't. Grew up in a
very abusive family and my life was like mommy Daris
Joan Crawford story, truly that, and I remember I was like,
why can't like why does she get to make all
like I have the same life?
Speaker 2 (34:36):
Well, because I'm not famous.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
But okay, if anyone wants to write a story about me,
I am in. I'll give you all the dirty details
as long as I'm paid upfront for this story.
Speaker 3 (34:48):
Bestsellers, best sellers, best sellers.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
And then I want to made. I want to start
a day. I want to star in the movie season
that they make from the book.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
I go, okay, would you rather find out your best
friend stole from you years ago and never told you,
or that they secretly sabotaged a relationship you had because
they didn't approve.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Oh that's easy for me.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
Yeah, what is it if they stole something from me
that was ten dollars or less?
Speaker 3 (35:23):
But there's no amount. I mean, I think I would
rather they stole than they ruined a relationship.
Speaker 1 (35:32):
But see, I don't see I'm just thinking I'm too logical.
If the relationship were meant to be, they couldn't sabotage it.
Speaker 3 (35:41):
Oh god, God, really just do the question like it is, like,
really pretend? Will you please?
Speaker 1 (35:48):
You have to be say wait, wait, wait, Susan, could
I please have the relationship?
Speaker 2 (35:53):
Can the relationship? What cat? He's going to say, I
need the relationship to see what I want you to
sabotage it. That's the answer to my question.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
We're still in the book. We like the book and.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
The movie the bestseller, and and we want we want royalties.
Oh my god, a whole new life, Susan for us,
our life story. Who wants to write it?
Speaker 3 (36:16):
This has absolutely been a trip today. I hope you
guys enjoyed it like we didn't. And maybe you could
answer some of those questions that we just asked, right
sin and let us know what.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
Your answer because they were hard.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
And while you're answering those questions, please follow us on
that Bachelor happy hour because you know what, we do
this all the time. Weeks on end. We have new
episodes coming. You don't want to miss them. You you
learn little things about us, little tidbits about it.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
But my curiosity is up. I want to know what
other people how they would answer that question. I'm curious.
I'm curious any of those questions we just said. Anytime
I want to know what people say, write us in.
You know how to do it. You just got to
submit your questions or your answers to those questions or
your comments, and all you have to do is go
(37:09):
to bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour and you know
the new on dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
Okay, it's time for us to go. I have to
go meet with an agent about my best selling novel
that it's about to come out about my life.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
I'm getting my tune, my comment owns for the movie.
It's all going to happen in the meeting.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Again, listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the
iHeartRadio app or wherever you.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
Listen to podcasts. Everybody, have a great week. Yeah,
Welcome back to about to our happy hours, Golden Hour.
Thanks for joining us today. We are as always excited
to be here and share some time with you.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
How are you doing today, Susan?
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Pretty good? Pretty good, waiting on the pins and the
plates going to be put in my arm here?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
But can I just say, can I just say little
known fact here? Two years ago I broke my wrist
exactly in the same way that Susan.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Why do I need to copy you? Why?
Speaker 2 (00:35):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
I was very foolish. We fell the same way. When
she called me, I was like, oh, let me tell
you what's coming your way? So God, but you know what,
She's good, She's gonna be fine. She's good to be fine.
Your wrist will be as good.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
No cartwheels for a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You know, and no understand.
Speaker 3 (00:53):
We're here to answer more of our fan questions, So guys,
make sure you keep submitting those. We love reading them,
and we definitely love hearing back from you to see
how things wait. You know what to do, Just go
to Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour and submit away,
because we're here to receive them and talk about them.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
And let me just say, since Susan can't do much,
she really wants to read your questions and contemplate her answers.
So please do us all a favor and send and
you know what. You can send us your questions, your updates,
send it to all of us. You'll be doing Susan
a favor. You can also DM us on Instagram at
Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
All right, okay, you ready, Kat, it's time.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
I'll get into the episode.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
And we're going to start with the question of the
day a day. Okay, when dating in your golden years,
how important is it that you live in the same
city or what about the same state? How important is
that when at our age? I mean it's more convenient, I'll.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
Say, uh, you know, I think it depends. I think
it depends on how you meet the person. If you
if you establish a relationship and you then are living
for like, say somebody's in town and you spend three
or four days with them, and you're like, oh, I'd
(02:24):
like to continue dating. I think long distance can work,
but I think it's tough. It's more difficult, it's more expensive.
I don't know many relationships. You know, we've interviewed some
young guys and women from the Bachelor series on our
(02:47):
podcast who have said it's an issue. I think it
is potentially an issue to get to the finish line.
And by the finish line, I don't mean marriage. I
just mean to solidify your relationship. I think it's hard.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
When you're for you, I'm asking you how important it
is is it that he lives in the same state
as you, or.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
It's not important in the beginning. In the beginning, yes,
it would not be It would not be hard as
long as I could fly there. And let's be clear
when I say as long as I could fly there,
as long as he's flying me there, I see. But yeah,
but but but I want I want more than just dating.
(03:31):
So when you're asking me specifically, you know, I don't
want to just date a guy in Seattle, you know,
and see him, you know, one weekend a month. That's
not what I'm looking for. I think it is. It's
more difficult. I got to tell you, though. I know
a guy who said to me that if you're with
(03:55):
a guy, you know, if you're dating him or a
serious relationship, you need to move where he is. He said,
women need to move where the men, where the man
is I don't know. I just tell you that's what
he said.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Well, I don't think who has the better area.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Well, I said to him similar. I said, well, wait
a minute. You know you've got a great job whatever
you're doing, whatever he does. And I said, let's just
pretend I'm a trial attorney and I'm very successful and
I'm only licensed in my state. You well, then he folded.
Then he said, well, if that were the case, then
(04:32):
I would make it a priority to come to see you.
And I said, okay, so I think it's more difficult.
I think you can date long distance, but if you're
asking me specifically, I want to see a guy more often.
So if I really like a guy, I'm going to go.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
I mean it would be important. I think it's easier,
way easier to see each other, to have a relationship.
But like you said, it can be done.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
Would you move, Susan, not generally, would you move to
be with the guy you're dating.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Yes, as long as I can come back and see
my family when I want. Yes.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I think at our age, you know, I think this
is hard hard. I think it is difficult for people
who are younger. Maybe listening to our podcast and We're
so glad you are. But at our age you have
to understand.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
That not all in the same city. Cap there's nobody
left here.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Well, that's for you. I have two children here and
two grandchildren.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Now I met men, it's a date.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Oh yeah, well there's that.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
We take them wherever we meet them.
Speaker 1 (05:41):
Yeah, but I'm just saying, our life now is an adventure.
And if I meet a guy that I'm interested in,
he's interested in me, and he says, hey, you know,
make it, come on out here and spend a couple
of weeks in me, I'm gone. I'm going And if
that goes well, then I'm going to spend more time
out there, or he's going to come see me more.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
You know, that's what I'm going to do.
Speaker 3 (06:02):
Yeah, it's fine, but I said, the only thing is
it's a little easier when they're local. But it's not
an end all. You know, if they're not, you make it.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Could you do it? But wait?
Speaker 1 (06:13):
How long could you date long distance? Because for me,
there'd be an expiration.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Date before you moved in with one another, you mean.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Before we committed to each other in a way that
one of us we were either spending you know, much
of the time together. It would depend on moved in,
who's retired and who's not.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Well at our age typically.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Typically, but if you date younger, they're still working so well.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
But see, that's really easy.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
If I were dating a younger man, which I'm happy
to do, by the way, and he's working, I'm going
there because I'm not working right right, that's a no
break or can work.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
Like I said, it's just easier if he's around here.
But it's not a deal breaker.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Just do you think it's harder for younger people.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Maybe because younger people have full time positions, you know,
they have to be they can only do a weekend
and if it's far, if it's on the other side
like California or wherever, that's a long flight to do
for a weekend.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
Yeah, some of our younger Bachelor Nation couples, I look
at them, one or both of them.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
You know, they're influencers. They're not tied to a desk.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Or cat from home.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
They can work from so they can travel around and
do what they do. But I think for younger people
who are building a career, if they're not working remote,
it's tough.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
It is. So it's all this.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Conversation to say that you have found me the guy
that wants to date me long distance.
Speaker 3 (07:51):
Give me time, Kath, I'm working on.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
It, all right, all right, all right, we're going to
get into our fan questions here.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
I'm going to read the first one.
Speaker 1 (07:59):
Let's go, Kyla, writes Susan and Kathy, you seem like
so much fun and a friend that everyone.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Would like to have.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Well, thank you, Kyla, we are, but we want you
to be our friend too. Kyla, Okay, if I ever
had the opportunity to meet you, I would talk to
you about so many things. I guess my question would be,
how do I build strong connections and a community around
me like you have with Kathy and the other relationships
(08:27):
you have built. Well, since she's directing it, you go, Susan,
what are you okay?
Speaker 3 (08:31):
Well, for starters, you need to be locked in a mansion,
no phones, weeks at a time with no phones and
no contact with the outside world, and you get to
know each other. I think it's more difficult out in
the real world. But you start with a friendship, somebody
(08:51):
that you enjoy, their company, that makes you feel good
to be around them, and you make them feel good.
Whether it's a joke or just being a positive person.
People like being around us.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
I think, Susan, yes, but you and I also, you know,
everyone thinks we just laugh and giggle all the time,
which we do, but both of us have our issues
with each other. Ride you know she does, I will say,
and I'm there for her. But I will say I
think part of building a strong friendship is listening to
(09:27):
the other person judging the other person, which something I've
had to work on hard in my life.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
So how do you break the rules? And Kathy's not
a rule breaker?
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Wait, excuse me, Bachelor Nation, Susan doesn't break the rules.
Susan shatters the rules and she leaves shattered glass everywhere
she goes and people have to dodge.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
You would like us. I hope you do get to
meet us someday because we're fun. We are, and we
have a serious side that we really do.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
But I would say, Kyla, you know, in the activities
that you're in, however, you meet people whoever it is right,
the friends you have, spend the time listening to them,
asking them it's just like dating in a way.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
And don't asking them to do with you as well?
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Yeah, but asking them about themselves. It's like dating, right,
find out about them.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
Ask too many questions, but be interested in what they come.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
I think people, yes, but I think people want to
feel heard and understood, and whether you're dating or a friend,
and so you need to I mean, I everyone knows Kathy.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Assay, and some days I'll say, Kathy, no more questions,
Let's just talk about life, right.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
But I do ask a lot of questions because that's
how I integrate whatever into my brain is by asking questions.
So I would encourage you, Kyla, the people that you're
friends with, spend time finding out what makes them tick
and what you guys have in common and what you
don't have in common, because that's what builds friendships. Not
(11:11):
it's not you don't want to clone friendships. I'm going
to be exactly like you.
Speaker 3 (11:15):
No, no, And you want to do fun things together,
things that make you smile. You know, maybe somebody likes
comedy and you like comedy. You go or hear music,
live music, It doesn't matter, but that's how you and
then that person, when they enjoy your company, is going
to tell the next person, right, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Like that's and Kylie, if I'm being really honest. The
reason Susan and I are such good friends. She does
a hell of a job cutting my hair and looking
for her and cooking.
Speaker 3 (11:45):
But here's babbling on bait cases.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
What? All right, here's the deal. Her broken wrist is
really cramping my style right now, so I'm gonna have
to get my hair cut somewhere.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
I got order out again.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
Oh and that's just thank you. That's just business as
usual for me, all right.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
You know what, Just be you, be real, and people
will know you're good people.
Speaker 2 (12:10):
Yep, I agree.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Okay, Kathy, Ready for the next one. This one's from Michelle. Hi,
Kathy and Susan. I so loved listening to you ladies
on my way to work. My daughter is getting married
this fall and we are all so excited. However, I
am so stressed out on what to wear. I don't
even know where to start. I am sixty two and
(12:39):
my younger years I could whip an outfit together and
feel fabulous, but not anymore. I don't want a typical
mother of the bride. Look, I don't blame you. My
body has changed so much and just want to feel good.
Where do I shop? This one probably is for Susan.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Loll excuse me or excuse me, Michelle.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
I would like to tell you exactly where to shop,
but I'm going to defer to Susan. In Susan's closet
with the money for the Okay, wait, I think wait,
I actually can take a stab at this because she's
more like me than you. Right, So Susan is a
great shopper, Michelle. But let me tell you Susan's how
(13:22):
and other Nancy, other people have helped me learn how
to shop. Here's what. The first thing you do, you
decide what styles. You're gonna be so proud of me, Susan.
You decide what looks good on you, what colors look
good on you, what styles and shapes you know, what
what yeah of what colors, and what profile looks good
on you?
Speaker 2 (13:42):
And you start with that.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Then get online and go to different department stores and
and just scroll looking at those profiles that you think look.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Good at.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
This is what I make her do. Sometimes I don't
like doing it. My God, I'll be here for for go.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
I hate it. I hate it. I'm just trying to
hate it.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Because here's the thing, Michelle, I'm right with you, I
say to Susan all the time, I don't know what
looks good. I mean, I have to try it on,
like and Susan's.
Speaker 3 (14:14):
Like, no, no, certain styles I already know. But you're
You're right, Kathy. You do need to put something on
something sometimes that you don't think is all that, and
you put it on it looks or quite the opposite. Wow,
look at that, and you put it on the Oh,
dear God, take it off.
Speaker 1 (14:31):
Just take it off, get it off, Okay, So give
her some advice, because that's my advice is You've taught
me to go online look at profiles and styles and
colors that I like. And it's still hard, Michelle, because
you know then it's like do I order A four,
A six or an eight because I've worn all three
sizes And there's that issue too, And it.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Depends on your body shape. What is going to look
best on you. I mean, there are people out there
you could actually hire your stylist to dress WSMS. I
know they always have stylists that you go ask the professional,
and so does Niman Marcus. But when I tell you
I can shop.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
This Targart, wait, just Target, Walmart.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
And Nieman Marcus in the same day, it doesn't matter
to me, and I'll wear both garments at the same
time and it looks fabulous together. So it's not only
about how much you're spending. It's not.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Oh, it never is.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
And in fact, Marshalls. You can find things in Marshalls.
Now not for a wedding.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Maybe, yes you can, but I get overwhelmed. Here's the thing,
Michelle and I totally get you. You get overwhelmed Susan.
I have shopped with Susan so many times. We'll walk
into a store. Susan is like a buzzard. She just
go and tell you if she's said a turkey hawk
she sees and she just goes hoo and decides and
(15:49):
yanks stuff off the hanger.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
I'm pathy or I'll say nope, not here, let's go.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:55):
But it's so it's difficult for people like us, Michelle,
you and I. It doesn't come naturally to us. But
you know I can go out and run six miles
and Susan can't. So we all have our strying.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
No, no, it's not that way, because she said back
when she was younger, she could whip together an outfit
really easy. I also, like I never would want to
look like when you google mother of the bride. Oh,
dear God. No, you can go to those dress stores
that are for proms and bob it's fuzz and you
(16:26):
know whatever. They they have so many different styles and
that's the person you say. Okay, I am looking I
am the mother of the bride. However, I don't want
to look like the mother of the bride. I want
to beat good. I want to feel good and it
will help you. Yeah, if not, I will write me
DM me.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
But I will say one other thing Susan has taught me,
which I hate trying on clothes.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
I really do hate shopping. I hate cooking and shopping.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
I don't know what guy wouldn't want me anyway, Susan
has talked me into trying on things to you, even
if I don't think, like if I like the colors,
something attracts me to it. But then I look at
oh no, this one look good on me. Susan will
always say try it, try it. And I have bought things.
One of the dresses I wore to a Bachelor Nation
(17:16):
function actually.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
The blackest shell.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
No, well that one too, but this was a sparkly
copper dress that I wouldn't have tried on in a
month of Sundays, and Susan said, no, try it on,
try to and I loved it and it looked great
on me, and I got so many compliments.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
So my mother said, you never know.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
My other suggestion, Michelle is take your if you have
a daughter, I take my daughter sometimes with me, take
a friend and say, help me pick out some things
to try on because it can be very overwhelming.
Speaker 3 (17:48):
Or DM me, what state do you live in?
Speaker 2 (17:50):
Love?
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Because I swear to God, Susan will shop for you.
She will do it. She with her broken wrist, she
will shop for you.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
I enjoy making people feel good about themselves. Say somebody's
really hippie, you know what I mean? Like wide on
the bottom, what is that a pear shape or something?
Then you're not going to get something that's so fitted
on the bottom and makes your top look invisible. You
want something to compliment an accent your good parts. And
(18:21):
you're right, Kathy. Sometimes color is an amazing, amazing change
in whatever it is. You feel good in it.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
But I don't know. I'm with you.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
I'm with you, Michelle. It's brutal, but let us know.
Send us pictures yes, and congratulations. By the way, I'm
the upcoming wedding of your daughter. All right, here's the
next one from m okay, which, by the way, if
your name is Emily, my sister's name is Emily and
we called her m so I don't know. Maybe it's
my sister writing this in Hi, Kathy and Susan, I
(18:54):
love your podcast and advice. I was curious how much
of an age difference is too much. I am talking
to a guy who is twenty six and I am twenty.
Obviously that can be two very different stages of life,
although I live a life different from most twenty year
(19:15):
olds and have finished college and work full time. WHOA
do you think this is an issue? Or could it
work out? So far it has been going great, But
interested to see what you guys think.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
Twenty and twenty six.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
He's six years older than she is, so well.
Speaker 1 (19:34):
Men when sure way slower than women. I was married
at twenty Susan, so I can't even imagine. I would
say to you, am you seem perceptive that you realize
that you could be at two different stages of life,
but you also seem responsible and mature because you have
finished college and you work full time at twenty. Most
(19:56):
twenty year olds are getting drunk on six straight and
partying and hardy, So you know, you don't seem like
a twenty year old.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
I don't think it's a big deal at all.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
Well, I think she said, do you think this is
an issue?
Speaker 3 (20:09):
Now?
Speaker 2 (20:09):
It could be an issue and could it work out?
Speaker 1 (20:12):
Absolutely? The only way you're going to know is keep
dating them, see how it goes.
Speaker 3 (20:19):
I mean, I'm wondering if she's wondering if he thinks
twenty is too young, you know what I mean? And
I'm sharing that that could be, but I wouldn't.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
I think I think she's insecure. It says like has
been going great.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Keep saying going great. Who cares? It's a number, it's.
Speaker 2 (20:39):
What no number? Your lips to God's ears, It's a number.
It can be a number and it can be real.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
I think that's fifty four and sixty eight.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
I don't know. Would you date someone fifty four?
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Yes? I would?
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Well, there you go, all right.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
So it's I think it's it's individal if it's working them,
you know what, God bless you. I'm so happy you
found your guy, and maybe he's not your permit forever guy.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Maybe he is. You're only going to know.
Speaker 3 (21:10):
That's a good point, Kathy, because you're twenty and he's
twenty six. I don't want to say the odds because,
like you, you got married at twenty and had a
wonderful marriage. I don't know that it's a forever person,
you know what I mean at that age because you
change and you're maturing in your twenties and in your thirties,
(21:33):
you're a little more level headed or settled about what
it is you want and what kind of life you
want with your partner. So right, but I wouldn't change
a thing. Just see what happens.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Yeah, I think you know what. Don't rush you down.
You're twenty. Enjoy the moment you're in, Enjoy the time
you guys have together.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
See where it goes.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
And by the way, you know at the top of
this podcast, am where we always say, right and let
us know we were talking to you and we're talking
to you.
Speaker 2 (22:04):
Let us know how it goes.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
Thanks for sharing too, all right. The next one is
from Melissa Hi, Kathy and Susan. I loved the podcast
and wanted some advice about a friend of mine. In
March of this year, me and my four best friends
planned a girl's trip to Miami for four days. We
paid for the flights and the air b and B
(22:26):
Already a couple of weeks after we planned the trip,
one of my friends lost their mom suddenly. The four
of us have given her so much love and support
and are helping her get through this tough time. She
recently brought up not wanting to go on the trip
anymore because she doesn't want to burden us if she
(22:47):
suddenly became sad and won't have a safe place to
go if we're out and about. I told her that
we would be there for her no matter what, but
she budge and wants to be refunded for her part
of the airbnb. Should we try and help her come
on the girl's trip because it won't be the same
(23:09):
without her, or let her stay home and grieve her mom.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Can I say you don't get I love you, Melissa.
You sound like a wonderful group of ladies of girls.
You don't get to let her do anything. I am
talking as a woman who grieved the loss of her husband.
I've lost my mom in the last year and a half.
I lost my dad. You don't get to write the rules.
Speaker 2 (23:36):
Melissa.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I hate to tell you you have to let her
grieve any way she wants. Do you have to refund
the money? No? Is it the kind generous thing to do? Yeah,
all of you and your girlfriend should say to her,
you know what, we want you to come. We hope
you'll change your mind, but we will happily refund your money.
(24:01):
But work on her to come.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
But one of the things she says, I won't have
a safe place to go if I become sad. What
does that mean?
Speaker 1 (24:09):
It just means Susan grief is so it's not linear.
You don't know when you're gonna feel grief.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
How it's gonna be you. But well, that's what she's say.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Go back to the place.
Speaker 1 (24:23):
Maybe maybe she's a I don't know, we don't have
enough information. Maybe, but I know when my husband first died,
I would break down public in public places. I was embarrassed,
I felt.
Speaker 3 (24:35):
And you know now, I, as your friend, if that happened,
would leave the function and go be with you and
talk it out, get it at let you.
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Yeah, but I'm saying in the moment, in the moment,
all you can think about is. I don't want other
people to see it. It's my private grief. I mean,
that's how I felt.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
You know.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
I can't speak for Melissa's friend, but I think in
this case you have to let her quote unk quote.
It is her life, it is her grief, it is
her journey through this grief.
Speaker 3 (25:05):
How long since? How long of us?
Speaker 1 (25:09):
She's just said lost their mom suddenly? So I'm guessing
it's recent because they just planned the trip.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
But I also agree with she says, should we try
and help her come on the girl's trip because it
won't be the same without her. I would share those
exact words, but we all care if you. If you
have a meltdown, we're here for you. Yes, you'll be
better in our company and cry it out. We're here
to hug you. It doesn't matter for us. We love you.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
Yes, But I one hundred percent agree with what you
just said, which is scary that I'm one hundred percent
agree with you.
Speaker 2 (25:43):
But it happens.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
Don't hold your breath. It's not happening again for the
next ten minutes at least. But but do you agree
Susan that if that they have to, they have to
honor thought her journey through this grief is yes. But
but I'm with you, Susan.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
I sometimes you might feel guilty, like, oh god, I
don't want to ruin it. I'm just not happy. I
don't want to go, but sometimes it's the best thing
to do.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
But I mean, I can tell you I couldn't function.
I couldn't go anywhere. I didn't want people to see me.
I mean, I understand what she's saying.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
When your husband died. You mean, oh my god, I
can't imagine that. I couldn't and that's what happened. And yeah,
I mean I couldn't. And I'm guessing this mom was
real to young My mom just passed away a year
and a half ago, who I loved with all my heart.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
But she was ninety six. Not but and she was
ninety six. I'm guessing this young girl's trip. I'm guessing
this mom died suddenly at a younger age. And so
that is very not very if you're not prepared. So
you are a good friend.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Melissa's kind heart, but do try to encourage her, but
accept what she decides. And you know what, you guys
have to cough up a little more money, Yeah exactly,
But you know what. Regardless of what happens Melissa, whether
she comes or not, go have a good time. Celebrate
your friendships because, as Susan and I can tell you,
(27:16):
good friendships like that don't come at around that often.
So you know, pray for your friend if she doesn't come,
but go and enjoy your telling me to friends, because
that just doesn't come around that often.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
No, doesn't appreciate it. Okay, Cathy, it's king, it's my favorite.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Oh God, would you rather? Here?
Speaker 2 (27:44):
We go?
Speaker 3 (27:44):
We're gonna switch off reading the prompt and both say
which we'd rather do and why? Okay, I'm going to
start with would you rather have a passionate once in
a lifetime romance that heartbreak or a steady loving partnership
(28:05):
that lacks excitement?
Speaker 2 (28:08):
You answer that one.
Speaker 1 (28:09):
I don't like the one that says lax excitement because
what does that mean?
Speaker 2 (28:13):
You're not jumping out an airplane?
Speaker 3 (28:15):
You know, to choose?
Speaker 2 (28:16):
I mean I don't want to choose.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
Wait, Susan, we live in a democratic society. You and
I have free will. We don't have to we don't
have to pick. We can say we would rather have
a passionate once in a lifetime romance that last forever.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
And honestly a loving partnership.
Speaker 1 (28:42):
That Okay, wait, wait, I can make this work. Wait, Susan,
I can make this work. You and I. Here's how
it's going to work. You and I are each going
to find the man that we have a passionate once
in a lifetime romance that ends in heartbreak one day
(29:05):
before we die.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
Done. Got that one figured out. Moving on there, we
go to the next one.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
Would you rather suddenly lose all your cherished memories but
keep your personality intact? Or keep all your memories but
have your personality completely change?
Speaker 3 (29:30):
Oh that's a brainer.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
What's your answer?
Speaker 3 (29:33):
I want my personality to stay just like it is.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
Isn't that funny? I'm exactly the same. So you know
all the fire I don't know, Jesus, I'm gonna have
to get some vodka out here or something. Wait, can
I just say, you know all the fires that were recently,
all the devastations in California that gave me Honestly, first
(29:57):
of all, my heart went out to all the people
a I can't even imagine. But at a very superficial level,
I sat there thinking, Kathy, will you take you know
what I thought I didn't care about.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
Any of my stuff. Isn't that awful?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
I just care about my kids. I would take my
passport like I would have. I have all those papers together,
but in terms of things, I just don't care. No,
Just are you the same or no?
Speaker 3 (30:28):
Yes, I would just be me. I mean I would
be devastated, of course, but I don't want to change
who I am. Yeah, all right. Would you rather relive
your most embarrassing moment once a month for the rest
of your life or have a stranger randomly bring it
(30:51):
up in conversation once a year.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Oh that's easy. I'd have a random stranger bringing up
in conversation once year. I'd be drunk or high, and
I wouldn't give a sh shimped what they said. Did
That was easy?
Speaker 3 (31:05):
That was a real easy one.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
All right?
Speaker 3 (31:07):
Would you rather have all your text and emails from
the last twenty years leaked to the public or have
every thought, have every thought you've ever had about others
spoken out loud?
Speaker 2 (31:24):
You know what this question? I actually like.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
I don't like this game. It's a new second no game.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
No, well wait a minute, wait a minute, wait, there
is a lesson in this Please tell me what it is.
Here's a lesson when and I taught. When I taught
eighth grade speech and communications, I taught the kids this,
you can say whatever you want to say when you
put something in writing on the internet, in a text,
(31:52):
an email, it.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Lives on there going to get this on in perpetuting.
Speaker 1 (31:58):
They were like, purple, what I said, it means it
lives forever. Someone always has access to that. So be
careful what you're right, Be careful what you say. So
in my case, I would rather have all my texts
and emails because I'm very careful about what I write.
Speaker 3 (32:15):
And she's so perfect punctuations grammar.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
I was an English Oh it drives me nuts. Once
an object, I think I would subject.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Agree with you because I don't think I send emails like.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Every thought I've ever had, weight every thought I've ever had.
I would be locked up.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
Prison with no razors.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Yeah, some warm hair.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
And bushy eyebrows.
Speaker 1 (32:44):
Oh god, Susan, you know that would be Susan in prison.
Let me just say, Susan in prison would be saying
what day is the hair salon? What day do we
get our hair done? I need my nails down and
broken nail what day is the nail is the nail
tech coming? And I'd be like, and you know, I'd
be saying, can I please get out and run six miles?
It's true, That's exactly how it would be, all right, Okay.
Speaker 3 (33:09):
Would you rather discover that your entire family secretly hates
your parties or that they have a secret group chat
dedicated to discussing your love life?
Speaker 2 (33:22):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (33:22):
That case it for me, My entire family, my parties
because I don't have them.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
Don't come if you don't like them, don't be talking
about my love life.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Well, can I just tell you my kids have talked
about you when I have dated guys they have.
Speaker 3 (33:39):
Oh yeah, my son's good on my cake? Seriously you
went out with him, Christopher.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
We don't care. We're living our best life, all right.
Would you rather have your deepest Ooh? I like this one.
Would you rather have your deepest secret turned into a
best selling novel that everyone knows is about you, or
have a terrible rumor about you spread that you can
never prove his faults. Oh, I want the book because
I'm doing the book.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
Tour money on it.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
Embarrass me and bring it on it.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
No, I've asked the way.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
Wait, can I just tell you I've often said this,
this is true, and they're all dead, so they can't
say so my mother, I can't. Grew up in a
very abusive family and my life was like mommy Daris
Joan Crawford story, truly that, and I remember I was like,
why can't like why does she get to make all
like I have the same life?
Speaker 2 (34:36):
Well, because I'm not famous.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
But okay, if anyone wants to write a story about me,
I am in. I'll give you all the dirty details
as long as I'm paid upfront for this story.
Speaker 3 (34:48):
Bestsellers, best sellers, best sellers.
Speaker 2 (34:51):
And then I want to made. I want to start
a day. I want to star in the movie season
that they make from the book.
Speaker 3 (35:00):
I go, okay, would you rather find out your best
friend stole from you years ago and never told you,
or that they secretly sabotaged a relationship you had because
they didn't approve.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
Oh that's easy for me.
Speaker 1 (35:17):
Yeah, what is it if they stole something from me
that was ten dollars or less?
Speaker 3 (35:23):
But there's no amount. I mean, I think I would
rather they stole than they ruined a relationship.
Speaker 1 (35:32):
But see, I don't see I'm just thinking I'm too logical.
If the relationship were meant to be, they couldn't sabotage it.
Speaker 3 (35:41):
Oh god, God, really just do the question like it is, like,
really pretend? Will you please?
Speaker 1 (35:48):
You have to be say wait, wait, wait, Susan, could
I please have the relationship?
Speaker 2 (35:53):
Can the relationship? What cat? He's going to say, I
need the relationship to see what I want you to
sabotage it. That's the answer to my question.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
We're still in the book. We like the book and.
Speaker 1 (36:06):
The movie the bestseller, and and we want we want royalties.
Oh my god, a whole new life, Susan for us,
our life story. Who wants to write it?
Speaker 3 (36:16):
This has absolutely been a trip today. I hope you
guys enjoyed it like we didn't. And maybe you could
answer some of those questions that we just asked, right
sin and let us know what.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
Your answer because they were hard.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
And while you're answering those questions, please follow us on
that Bachelor happy hour because you know what, we do
this all the time. Weeks on end. We have new
episodes coming. You don't want to miss them. You you
learn little things about us, little tidbits about it.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
But my curiosity is up. I want to know what
other people how they would answer that question. I'm curious.
I'm curious any of those questions we just said. Anytime
I want to know what people say, write us in.
You know how to do it. You just got to
submit your questions or your answers to those questions or
your comments, and all you have to do is go
(37:09):
to bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour and you know
the new on dm us on Instagram at Bachelor Happy Hour.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
Okay, it's time for us to go. I have to
go meet with an agent about my best selling novel
that it's about to come out about my life.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
I'm getting my tune, my comment owns for the movie.
It's all going to happen in the meeting.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Again, listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the
iHeartRadio app or wherever you.
Speaker 2 (37:35):
Listen to podcasts. Everybody, have a great week. Yeah,
Hosts And Creators
Joe Amabile
Susan Noles
Serena Pitt
Kathy Swarts
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