Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Did you know, dear listener, that Bad Manners has now
been running for forty five episodes. That's almost a year
of scandal, gossip and me asking serious questions like this.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I don't know if you do you read Nuts magazine.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
I'm not a great reader of Nuts magazine.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Now, yes, it's been quite a year, but all good
things must come to an end, and this episode, believe
it or not, is the last in the series. So,
just like a teacher showing a video and the last
air term, I'm want to go slow. That's why I've
resorted to our old friend chat GPT to introduce this episode.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
Well, well, well, ladies and gents, brace yourselves for a
journey through history that's about as dignified as a cad
in a two DOOO. Welcome to the Bad Manner's History Podcast,
the place where we throw the rule book of stuffy
history out of the window and dive headfirst into the
untold tales, the scandalous stories, and the downright daft moments
that time tried to forget. So far, so good, Ashley,
(01:01):
I'm your delightful guide with the charm of a rogue
and the grace of a three legged cat. Tom Houghton
at your service. Today, we're not just flipping through dusty
old books. We're disco dancing our way through the annals
of history like it's the world's most fabulous ball on
the History Podcast today.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Uh yeah, okay.
Speaker 4 (01:19):
So tighten your historical corsets and straighten your top hats
from the past, because on this history podcast, we're about
to step into the past with me. I'm Tom Houghton.
What this is the Bad Manner's History Podcast where history
meets hilarity and the only thing we take seriously is
having a jolly good time. Let the historical shenanigans begin.
(01:41):
It's a Bad Manner's History podcast and I'm Tom Houghton.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Oh no, sounds just like me. The machines will replace
our jobs. Well, it looks like I have to do
everything around him myself, doesn't it.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Fine, Let's try it again, shall we.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Yes, it's been almost a year since we launched Bad
Manners and this episode marks the end of the road
for now at least. But before we bid you farewell,
we've got some reflecting to do. After all, Like the
robots said, we're a history podcast, and what's a history
podcast without a little reflection? Let the historical shenanigans begin.
(02:27):
It's a Bad Manners History podcast, and I'm Tom Horton.
One of my favorite accidental bonuses of making this podcast
has been the phrases that some people have come up with.
Take this, for example, from our Bletchley Park episode, Research
Officer Tom Cheatham is talking about famous Bletchley alumni Alan
Turing and the movie The Imitation Game.
Speaker 5 (02:50):
Well, the process shown in the film didn't happen. The
entire process and the chronology shown in the film didn't happen.
I think the most egregious sort of infelicity of the
film is that implies that Alan Turing is working with
this spy John Knecross, who I mentioned they never worked
together in real life, but also in the film, Turing
discovers he's a spy and then keeps it to himself,
which would make him a traitor. I think that's quite
(03:11):
a slammer on him, which is completely unjustified by the
historical record. But aside from that, you know, all the
details of the code breaking in the film are pretty inaccurate.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (03:21):
Sure, Egregious infelicity is the phrase I'm taking from that.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Erica's right.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Egregious Infelicity is a hell of a phrase, sounds like
a metal band, and that's not the only metal band
to make it into Bad Manners, Ladies and Gentlemen, Devils
and Sinners. I'll give you the lineup the manifest the
Bad Manners Metal Festival. Starting on the Pain Stage, our headliners.
Speaker 8 (03:48):
Are Egregious Infelicity.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Followed by three legendary bands back to back. The Scavenger's Daughter,
Dead Dog Graveyard is everywhere. Over on the Bad Manners
Introducing Stage, we have three of this year's breakout.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Bears, Sensible Quakers, Rembrandt Up Your.
Speaker 8 (04:10):
Crevice, the Hermitic Order of the Golden.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Dawn in the q stag Gent, we've got stripped down sessions.
Speaker 9 (04:17):
From Veteran of Evil, The Gaze of the Bullgo Beyond
Pandora's Box, the Juicers of Henry the Eighth Grace, some Editions,
and last but not least, an Air of Utrescence.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
And finally we've got DJ sets from the Priest Hunters.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
And specialist Stick Twister.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
What a lineup.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Tickets will be available at a Bad Manner's website, or
at least they would if it was a real festival
and we actually had a website. It's been a real
privilege traveling the country up and down and visiting these
bad manners. But what I love more than anything is
meeting the people at these places, and we've met some
(05:04):
wonderful ones.
Speaker 8 (05:13):
I'm so glad to see you.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
And then you're being really sweet because it's a long journey.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
Now you've been very grateful, very excited to sleep sea vote. Well,
do you know what the castle's going?
Speaker 8 (05:23):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah, what happens We've just seen it from the train.
It's uh. When we visited Topbury Castle in Staffordshire, we
were very kindly picked up from the train station by
the castle's curator, Leslie Smith, with the Bad Manor's crew
squishing her jag.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Leslie and I became very close, very quickly.
Speaker 8 (05:45):
I can't wait to see you'll be there, did you see.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I've been looking forward to that, or yeah, meeting my
leather comes on.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
It's the sensation that's.
Speaker 7 (05:54):
Been seen the WI women.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Then any Sponge resident nor.
Speaker 7 (05:58):
Come in seventy screaming a love and then doctors, you.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Know, i'd come mixed a punch.
Speaker 10 (06:05):
Condo doesn't come down with me episode I'd like to see.
We have a lot of fun as full as it
was to meet Leslie, her driving didn't exactly put me
at ease.
Speaker 11 (06:20):
When I get.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Driving seventy six, that strikes me as you were bad
at driving.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Yeah, yeah, that's not remember of confidence. That means that
you've failed your tests again. I only had my test once.
Speaker 7 (06:37):
But it would have been cheap if to have married
the instructor.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
I didn't realize that was an option. It could be
it are we about to meet your husband?
Speaker 8 (06:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 10 (06:49):
Yeah, the newest one nervous the nervous one one driving test,
but no three three day one of course died survived.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Oh you're half a Henry the eight.
Speaker 9 (07:07):
It's so round.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
No, it's nice. Why not?
Speaker 1 (07:12):
You can't and the last didn't stop in the car.
Leslie continued to bring the lulls during the interview.
Speaker 7 (07:19):
Well, we can actually have a fire in the fireplace
if we want to, but we put a candles in today.
But we find that the smoke tends to put people
off a bit if it's a real blowy job. So
what we do is we have no no.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I mean, if it's like we're gonna get I should
say that.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Yes, you are an expert in sexual contraception of the
fifteen fifties to eighties.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
But that blowy job was not a refersdation.
Speaker 7 (07:41):
No, it wasn't, but we could make it one later.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Leslie Smith Ladies and Gentlemen. The only contributor on Bad
Manners who loves an innuendo more than me? And that's
hard I said, that's hardy. Another standout guest in this
series was Chilliam Castle.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
Sir Humphrey Wakefield, thank you for putting the fire on
as well. He lit a fire for me too, a
real one.
Speaker 6 (08:11):
It's quite meanly literature, its usually blazing more ah.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
That voice.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
Yes, Sir Humphrey was the posius man I've ever met.
He also said one of the most profound things I've
ever heard anyone say on a podcast. We were about
to wrap up. We were about to wrap up our
interview and go on a ghost hunt.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
When I asked him, do you believe in ghosts?
Speaker 6 (08:34):
One can't not. It's like saying to a blind man,
do you believe in color?
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Wow?
Speaker 6 (08:39):
You know it's another dimention. But you know, if you're
a blind man and you have some friends who have
seen color, you can't understand color, but you've never seen it,
But you're a damn foolish bland man. Say it doesn't exist.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
The sage words of Sir Humphrey Wakefield from Chilliam Castle.
Sir Humphrey had away with words that I do not.
My producer Chris has been trolling the archives and the
most intellectual thing.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
He can find me saying is this.
Speaker 8 (09:08):
I don't know what.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
The biggest animal you think you could take in a
fight is myself. I think I can take a penguin.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
No one's gonna post that as an inspirational quote on Instagram,
are they?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Anyway?
Speaker 1 (09:18):
After chatting to Sir Humphrey, we went for our ghost
hunt with this man.
Speaker 8 (09:23):
Hello. My name is Richard Craig and I am Chillingham's
resident ghost hunter.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
About halfway through our highly scientific paranormal investigation, Richard left
me and my producers, Willhelm and Beck's all alone in
the dark.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
This man was a sadist.
Speaker 8 (09:41):
You know we lost our power on that device. Yes,
I've just lost power on that speaker. I'm just gonna
run down and get another speaker.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Are you leaving it here?
Speaker 8 (09:49):
I'll be back in a second.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Look, I've watched enough horror movies know that this is
when the bad stuff starts happening, don't split.
Speaker 8 (09:56):
Up, Yes, it's it's just keep still, you'll be fine.
But there's that's two drilling. As we've hadded in five minutes.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
Why don't we bring batteries with us?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
While he was gone, I took the opportunity to play
with his rod, his divining rods, you perverts, and lo
and behold they started to move, which could only mean
one thing.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
You're going to die. That's what the ghost is telling me.
Speaker 6 (10:25):
You're making that move, right, I'm not yes.
Speaker 10 (10:28):
I'm not promising.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
His beg's going to die tonight.
Speaker 8 (10:40):
Here.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Yes, hm oh, I had a quick fundle of your
rod while you're away, right, yeah, okay, that's exactly what happened.
And from the sounds of it, I don't think Richard
was that impressed. Probably thought we were incredibly unprofessional, and
he right, but you know, and he'd be right.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
But you know what, I'm not.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
The only unette person involved in this podcast. It takes
our whole team of amateurs to make this show. Here's
producer Chris recording a guide track to one of our episodes.
Speaker 12 (11:15):
It's rich history spans nearly one thousand years, which is
a lot longer than King Edward the Second managed to last,
as in thirteen twenty seven he fell victim within its
walls to one mouse. Mouse, he fell victim. It's rich
(11:40):
history spans nearly one thousand years, which is a lot
longer than King Edward managed to last, as in thirteen
twenty seven he fell victim within its walls to one
of the most brutal murders of any mouse.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Right, okay, right, right, right, right right, what a shambles.
Needless to say, mouse is no longer on the payroll.
To be honest, I'm not sure she should have been
in the first place. She brings nothing to the table
apart from the odd stick, and the hiccups don't end
(12:25):
with the staff. Sometimes our contributors have the audacity to
become possessed during our interviews. Here's Meghan Keary from the
Commandery episode, telling us, or at least trying to, about
Saint Wolfston.
Speaker 13 (12:39):
No, yeah, not bad at all.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
That was a weird noise, but don't worry at all.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Luckily you're not speaking directly into a microphone being recorded
for a podcast, so I think you definitely got away
with that.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Talking about the Devil and the Virgin Mary.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
And so they Lucifer crept up your throat and went laugh.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
You can't burt properly? Do you know what you should do?
You know what you should do?
Speaker 1 (13:10):
You should you should pray, just saying Wolf stand to
help you burt properly, rather than making noises like the grudge.
So we're back with the baby Duke. As we go
through this podcast.
Speaker 13 (13:22):
Recording, it was lovely. I want to it was funny
how you were talking about the devil when it happened.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
But as I went into the wow, yeah, yeah, yeah,
You've got in a church and your ungodly the ungodly
(14:07):
Meghan key there, or perhaps it was the devil speaking
through Meghan. Let's go with that. Sounds more dramatic than
an acid reflux. That devil is a pesky bugger.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
You know.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
He got his claws into me a few times while
recording this podcast. As you can imagine, I'm a one
take wonder when it comes to recording these pickups, and
I don't let dogs bark all over the recordings either.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Chris.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
However, on the odd occasion the devil has made me
fluff a line or two or six, who's counting.
Speaker 11 (14:36):
Oldchester Castle episode one pickup and.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
I'm regularly fed.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
There I go, I'm getting back then crimes against if
I was if women were imprisonsful, if women were imprisonsful,
could men be doing? British him tune. There's nothing like
podcast present there I did.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
I feel like spittally.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
People look people in, unimportant, unimportant people in.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
I mean, I could creek.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
And if you love podcasts, mind your manners.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Cool before you judge.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
I'll have you know that saying words is actually quite difficult,
as illustrated in this next clip. And that's just the
and that's just the beginning of an astonishing story. And
and a very long light and a very long light
and a very long night and a very long night
(16:01):
and a very long night at Ripley Castle, and a
very long night and a very long night of Ripley Castle.
Don't miss it until then, don't forget next year, Mark's
last seven hundredth.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
It's the words.
Speaker 8 (16:15):
Enough happen.
Speaker 12 (16:20):
Right stop.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
And if words weren't hard enough, I'm also expected to
pronounce posh people's names.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
That's a nightmare.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
This job is a nightmare. But before we go, do
you remember the story of Sir William Am Cotton. But
before we go, but before we get home, but before
we go, do you remember the story of Sir William
am Cott Ingleby? But before we go, do you remember
(17:03):
the story of Sir William Amcott. Fucking Jesus is stupid
posh cunts, these fucking ridiculous names. Just but before we go,
do you remember the story of Sir William Amcott.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
In fucking But before we go?
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Do you remember the story of Sir William Ancott, William Amcott,
Willy am Amcott in Willi am Amcott.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
That's fucking horrible.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
But before we go, do you remember the story of
William Amcott ingle Fucking these posh people and these stupid
fucking names, Sir William am Kott Ingleby? So William am
Kott Ingleby, that's not a name as a Welsh town.
But before we go, do you remember?
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Like I said, do you know?
Speaker 1 (17:47):
But before we go, do you remember the story of
Sir William and coott Ingley. I did eventually get the
names right, but it was at the expense of several
smash laptops and a very very exhausted producer. Like I said,
I blame the devil. I've never been anything short of professional.
During this series, not once have I ever smashed a
(18:09):
laptop or veered wildly off topic and gone down to
Kevin bacon rabbit hole during the.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
Middle of an interview.
Speaker 9 (18:14):
So great, great figure.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
Never killed anyone directly, but surely indirectly.
Speaker 9 (18:22):
I mean, yeah, but we've all done that indirectly, haven't we.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
We've all killed someone indirectly?
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Have we done?
Speaker 9 (18:30):
How many removes can we go to? Here?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
Have you your full six degrees of separation?
Speaker 9 (18:35):
Then six degrees of separation?
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Well, yeah, my dad's the exit of the British military,
so I think.
Speaker 9 (18:41):
I think that, yeah, you're probably you're probably two steps
away in that course. Then yeah, yeah, with Kevin Bacon,
do you successfully are there?
Speaker 1 (18:48):
I reckon, Kevin Bacon is the lynchpin of every game
of six Degrees of Separation.
Speaker 9 (18:54):
By which the whole cosmos turns. There at the middle
is Kevin Bacon. Don't ask me to link to medieval
members of the Percy family, but I, with enough thought
we could probably get there.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
Part of me really wants to try and do that.
Can we try and link Kevin Bacon to a member
of the Percy family?
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Okay, go on, try I'm interested.
Speaker 9 (19:17):
Okay, So Kevin Bacacon was in x Men First Class
with Michael.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
It's a great start. I love it. Al, okay, so
straight to Michael Fassbender.
Speaker 9 (19:25):
Yeah, Fastbender was in right, we can go two ways
with Fastbender. We can either go Fastbender was in X
Men Apocalypse with Oscar Isaac, who was in June with
Timothy Shallomey who played Henry the Fifth in the King,
which starts with the rebellion of Harry Hotspur of the Percys.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
You've absolutely nailed that without even that's that is very
impro I'm gonna give you a roundom applause.
Speaker 9 (19:49):
Thank you so much, thank you.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
That was so quick.
Speaker 8 (19:52):
Well, I know, Kevin Bacon, I guess yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
Well, also we should mention you are you do do
a historical improv show where you should do six degrees
of Separation on it.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
That's a good game, six.
Speaker 9 (20:04):
Agreews of historical separation, but with Kevin Bacon in all.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Instances, but it all starts with Kevin.
Speaker 9 (20:10):
Bacon to Confucius, go.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
No.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
I love it so much in fact that if Bad
Manners doesn't get a second series, I'm pitching that as
a podcast idea. Look out, iHeart your numbers are about
to go through the roof.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
You're welcome.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
And finally, while we're on the topic of series two,
there are some promises I've made throughout this series that
I'm likely to break if we don't return. For example,
you might remember this ghost story from our Muncaster Castle episode.
Speaker 11 (20:49):
The Tapestry Room, which is our haunted room, or the
one that we used to put family friends in, but
we had too many people complaining that they couldn't sleep
because of a crying child, And of course the whole
thing was there was no crying child there. Lots of
these people had never met each other before, but they
would tell the same story that late in the night
(21:12):
they would start to hear a child crying, and supposedly
the bit that I like hate the love is that
it's fine the child crying. It's just when the nurse
starts singing to try and calm the child that people
get too freaked out and it becomes overwhelming.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Well, I've never really been one to believe in that
kind of thing. In fact, I've been pretty dismissive of
the paranormal in general.
Speaker 8 (21:40):
Quite often a family member might inadvertently bring a spirit
with them.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Really.
Speaker 6 (21:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
In fact, I've been pretty dismissive of the paranormal in general. However,
my skepticism was all set to change when I met.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
This man, Bloody hell.
Speaker 4 (21:57):
Tom.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
That's writer, broadcaster and host of BBC's Uncanny podcast, Danny Robbins.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
Bloody hell all of us.
Speaker 1 (22:04):
The story of the crying girl, whose name was Susan
by the way, had all the hallmarks of an Uncanny episode,
multiple people experiencing the same thing, the history of the
castle corroborating the stories, and a very vivid personal story
from someone who worked there.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
So, in an attempt to.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Get me off the team, Skeptic Bench producer Chris thought
I should approach it with an open mind. So I
presented Danny with the story to see if it was
worth investigating, and here's what he had to say.
Speaker 3 (22:33):
I'd love to know more about this. Basically, you get
back on to him, but you know, because Susan feels
like a name from the kind of you know, more
from a kind of twentieth century name to me. But
then I think there's a good story here. I think again,
going back to that that desire for as humans to
impose stories on things, you know, you know how much
to what extent are we sort of taking these things
and joining the dots and putting them together. But you've
(22:54):
got a lot of strange activity associated with that room,
and it's happening to a lot of different people, to
a lot of different people at different times of their
lives and different times of the castle's history, and it's
frightening them. And I think, you know, we need to
take that seriously.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
I think, so take it seriously. I did. I made
this promise at the end of the episode, rest.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Assured I am now a new man, open minded and
ready to investigate. So join me on a future episode
where I'll be taking everything Danny has taught me today
and applying it to this compelling case. So am I
a man of my word like the Joker? Or am
I just making stuff up like the Joker? You'll have
to stay tuned to find out. Ooh, so, how's that
(23:37):
for a cliffhanger? Take that Game of Thrones or Breaking
Bad or whichever series you watch that's known for cliffhangers.
But seriously, do stay subscribed to Bad Manners, and I
hope we'll see all again soon. It's honestly been a
real pleasure and a privilege to bring you all of
these stories over the last year. So thank you for
listening and for all your kind words. That's all we've
got time for this series, So for the last time ever.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
For now Mind your Manners.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
Thanks for listening to Bad Manners. If you like the pod,
please share it with your friends, Rate it on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Leave a review, and make sure you spill the tea
on any of your favorite bad Manners that we could
feature in future episodes. This podcast was produced by Atamei
Studios for iHeartRadio. It was hosted by me Tom Horton.
(24:29):
It was produced by Willie Lensky, Rebecca Rappaport, and Chris Ataway.
It was executive produced by Face Steur and Zad Rogers.
Our production manager is Caitlin Paramore and our production coordinator
is Bellasolini.
Did you know, dear listener, that Bad Manners has now
been running for forty five episodes. That's almost a year
of scandal, gossip and me asking serious questions like this.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
I don't know if you do you read Nuts magazine.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
I'm not a great reader of Nuts magazine.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Now, yes, it's been quite a year, but all good
things must come to an end, and this episode, believe
it or not, is the last in the series. So,
just like a teacher showing a video and the last
air term, I'm want to go slow. That's why I've
resorted to our old friend chat GPT to introduce this episode.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
Well, well, well, ladies and gents, brace yourselves for a
journey through history that's about as dignified as a cad
in a two DOOO. Welcome to the Bad Manner's History Podcast,
the place where we throw the rule book of stuffy
history out of the window and dive headfirst into the
untold tales, the scandalous stories, and the downright daft moments
that time tried to forget. So far, so good, Ashley,
(01:01):
I'm your delightful guide with the charm of a rogue
and the grace of a three legged cat. Tom Houghton
at your service. Today, we're not just flipping through dusty
old books. We're disco dancing our way through the annals
of history like it's the world's most fabulous ball on
the History Podcast today.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Uh yeah, okay.
Speaker 4 (01:19):
So tighten your historical corsets and straighten your top hats
from the past, because on this history podcast, we're about
to step into the past with me. I'm Tom Houghton.
What this is the Bad Manner's History Podcast where history
meets hilarity and the only thing we take seriously is
having a jolly good time. Let the historical shenanigans begin.
(01:41):
It's a Bad Manner's History podcast and I'm Tom Houghton.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Oh no, sounds just like me. The machines will replace
our jobs. Well, it looks like I have to do
everything around him myself, doesn't it.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
Fine, Let's try it again, shall we.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Yes, it's been almost a year since we launched Bad
Manners and this episode marks the end of the road
for now at least. But before we bid you farewell,
we've got some reflecting to do. After all, Like the
robots said, we're a history podcast, and what's a history
podcast without a little reflection? Let the historical shenanigans begin.
(02:27):
It's a Bad Manners History podcast, and I'm Tom Horton.
One of my favorite accidental bonuses of making this podcast
has been the phrases that some people have come up with.
Take this, for example, from our Bletchley Park episode, Research
Officer Tom Cheatham is talking about famous Bletchley alumni Alan
Turing and the movie The Imitation Game.
Speaker 5 (02:50):
Well, the process shown in the film didn't happen. The
entire process and the chronology shown in the film didn't happen.
I think the most egregious sort of infelicity of the
film is that implies that Alan Turing is working with
this spy John Knecross, who I mentioned they never worked
together in real life, but also in the film, Turing
discovers he's a spy and then keeps it to himself,
which would make him a traitor. I think that's quite
(03:11):
a slammer on him, which is completely unjustified by the
historical record. But aside from that, you know, all the
details of the code breaking in the film are pretty inaccurate.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (03:21):
Sure, Egregious infelicity is the phrase I'm taking from that.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Erica's right.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Egregious Infelicity is a hell of a phrase, sounds like
a metal band, and that's not the only metal band
to make it into Bad Manners, Ladies and Gentlemen, Devils
and Sinners. I'll give you the lineup the manifest the
Bad Manners Metal Festival. Starting on the Pain Stage, our headliners.
Speaker 8 (03:48):
Are Egregious Infelicity.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Followed by three legendary bands back to back. The Scavenger's Daughter,
Dead Dog Graveyard is everywhere. Over on the Bad Manners
Introducing Stage, we have three of this year's breakout.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Bears, Sensible Quakers, Rembrandt Up Your.
Speaker 8 (04:10):
Crevice, the Hermitic Order of the Golden.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Dawn in the q stag Gent, we've got stripped down sessions.
Speaker 9 (04:17):
From Veteran of Evil, The Gaze of the Bullgo Beyond
Pandora's Box, the Juicers of Henry the Eighth Grace, some Editions,
and last but not least, an Air of Utrescence.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
And finally we've got DJ sets from the Priest Hunters.
Speaker 1 (04:38):
And specialist Stick Twister.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
What a lineup.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Tickets will be available at a Bad Manner's website, or
at least they would if it was a real festival
and we actually had a website. It's been a real
privilege traveling the country up and down and visiting these
bad manners. But what I love more than anything is
meeting the people at these places, and we've met some
(05:04):
wonderful ones.
Speaker 8 (05:13):
I'm so glad to see you.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
And then you're being really sweet because it's a long journey.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
Now you've been very grateful, very excited to sleep sea vote. Well,
do you know what the castle's going?
Speaker 8 (05:23):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah, what happens We've just seen it from the train.
It's uh. When we visited Topbury Castle in Staffordshire, we
were very kindly picked up from the train station by
the castle's curator, Leslie Smith, with the Bad Manor's crew
squishing her jag.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Leslie and I became very close, very quickly.
Speaker 8 (05:45):
I can't wait to see you'll be there, did you see.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
I've been looking forward to that, or yeah, meeting my
leather comes on.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
It's the sensation that's.
Speaker 7 (05:54):
Been seen the WI women.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Then any Sponge resident nor.
Speaker 7 (05:58):
Come in seventy screaming a love and then doctors, you.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Know, i'd come mixed a punch.
Speaker 10 (06:05):
Condo doesn't come down with me episode I'd like to see.
We have a lot of fun as full as it
was to meet Leslie, her driving didn't exactly put me
at ease.
Speaker 11 (06:20):
When I get.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Driving seventy six, that strikes me as you were bad
at driving.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Yeah, yeah, that's not remember of confidence. That means that
you've failed your tests again. I only had my test once.
Speaker 7 (06:37):
But it would have been cheap if to have married
the instructor.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
I didn't realize that was an option. It could be
it are we about to meet your husband?
Speaker 8 (06:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 10 (06:49):
Yeah, the newest one nervous the nervous one one driving test,
but no three three day one of course died survived.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
Oh you're half a Henry the eight.
Speaker 9 (07:07):
It's so round.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
No, it's nice. Why not?
Speaker 1 (07:12):
You can't and the last didn't stop in the car.
Leslie continued to bring the lulls during the interview.
Speaker 7 (07:19):
Well, we can actually have a fire in the fireplace
if we want to, but we put a candles in today.
But we find that the smoke tends to put people
off a bit if it's a real blowy job. So
what we do is we have no no.
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I mean, if it's like we're gonna get I should
say that.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
Yes, you are an expert in sexual contraception of the
fifteen fifties to eighties.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
But that blowy job was not a refersdation.
Speaker 7 (07:41):
No, it wasn't, but we could make it one later.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Leslie Smith Ladies and Gentlemen. The only contributor on Bad
Manners who loves an innuendo more than me? And that's
hard I said, that's hardy. Another standout guest in this
series was Chilliam Castle.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
Sir Humphrey Wakefield, thank you for putting the fire on
as well. He lit a fire for me too, a
real one.
Speaker 6 (08:11):
It's quite meanly literature, its usually blazing more ah.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
That voice.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
Yes, Sir Humphrey was the posius man I've ever met.
He also said one of the most profound things I've
ever heard anyone say on a podcast. We were about
to wrap up. We were about to wrap up our
interview and go on a ghost hunt.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
When I asked him, do you believe in ghosts?
Speaker 6 (08:34):
One can't not. It's like saying to a blind man,
do you believe in color?
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Wow?
Speaker 6 (08:39):
You know it's another dimention. But you know, if you're
a blind man and you have some friends who have
seen color, you can't understand color, but you've never seen it,
But you're a damn foolish bland man. Say it doesn't exist.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
The sage words of Sir Humphrey Wakefield from Chilliam Castle.
Sir Humphrey had away with words that I do not.
My producer Chris has been trolling the archives and the
most intellectual thing.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
He can find me saying is this.
Speaker 8 (09:08):
I don't know what.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
The biggest animal you think you could take in a
fight is myself. I think I can take a penguin.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
No one's gonna post that as an inspirational quote on Instagram,
are they?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Anyway?
Speaker 1 (09:18):
After chatting to Sir Humphrey, we went for our ghost
hunt with this man.
Speaker 8 (09:23):
Hello. My name is Richard Craig and I am Chillingham's
resident ghost hunter.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
About halfway through our highly scientific paranormal investigation, Richard left
me and my producers, Willhelm and Beck's all alone in
the dark.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
This man was a sadist.
Speaker 8 (09:41):
You know we lost our power on that device. Yes,
I've just lost power on that speaker. I'm just gonna
run down and get another speaker.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Are you leaving it here?
Speaker 8 (09:49):
I'll be back in a second.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Look, I've watched enough horror movies know that this is
when the bad stuff starts happening, don't split.
Speaker 8 (09:56):
Up, Yes, it's it's just keep still, you'll be fine.
But there's that's two drilling. As we've hadded in five minutes.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
Why don't we bring batteries with us?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
While he was gone, I took the opportunity to play
with his rod, his divining rods, you perverts, and lo
and behold they started to move, which could only mean
one thing.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
You're going to die. That's what the ghost is telling me.
Speaker 6 (10:25):
You're making that move, right, I'm not yes.
Speaker 10 (10:28):
I'm not promising.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
His beg's going to die tonight.
Speaker 8 (10:40):
Here.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Yes, hm oh, I had a quick fundle of your
rod while you're away, right, yeah, okay, that's exactly what happened.
And from the sounds of it, I don't think Richard
was that impressed. Probably thought we were incredibly unprofessional, and
he right, but you know, and he'd be right.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
But you know what, I'm not.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
The only unette person involved in this podcast. It takes
our whole team of amateurs to make this show. Here's
producer Chris recording a guide track to one of our episodes.
Speaker 12 (11:15):
It's rich history spans nearly one thousand years, which is
a lot longer than King Edward the Second managed to last,
as in thirteen twenty seven he fell victim within its
walls to one mouse. Mouse, he fell victim. It's rich
(11:40):
history spans nearly one thousand years, which is a lot
longer than King Edward managed to last, as in thirteen
twenty seven he fell victim within its walls to one
of the most brutal murders of any mouse.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Right, okay, right, right, right, right right, what a shambles.
Needless to say, mouse is no longer on the payroll.
To be honest, I'm not sure she should have been
in the first place. She brings nothing to the table
apart from the odd stick, and the hiccups don't end
(12:25):
with the staff. Sometimes our contributors have the audacity to
become possessed during our interviews. Here's Meghan Keary from the
Commandery episode, telling us, or at least trying to, about
Saint Wolfston.
Speaker 13 (12:39):
No, yeah, not bad at all.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
That was a weird noise, but don't worry at all.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
Luckily you're not speaking directly into a microphone being recorded
for a podcast, so I think you definitely got away
with that.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Talking about the Devil and the Virgin Mary.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
And so they Lucifer crept up your throat and went laugh.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
You can't burt properly? Do you know what you should do?
You know what you should do?
Speaker 1 (13:10):
You should you should pray, just saying Wolf stand to
help you burt properly, rather than making noises like the grudge.
So we're back with the baby Duke. As we go
through this podcast.
Speaker 13 (13:22):
Recording, it was lovely. I want to it was funny
how you were talking about the devil when it happened.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
But as I went into the wow, yeah, yeah, yeah,
You've got in a church and your ungodly the ungodly
(14:07):
Meghan key there, or perhaps it was the devil speaking
through Meghan. Let's go with that. Sounds more dramatic than
an acid reflux. That devil is a pesky bugger.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
You know.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
He got his claws into me a few times while
recording this podcast. As you can imagine, I'm a one
take wonder when it comes to recording these pickups, and
I don't let dogs bark all over the recordings either.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Chris.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
However, on the odd occasion the devil has made me
fluff a line or two or six, who's counting.
Speaker 11 (14:36):
Oldchester Castle episode one pickup and.
Speaker 2 (14:41):
I'm regularly fed.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
There I go, I'm getting back then crimes against if
I was if women were imprisonsful, if women were imprisonsful,
could men be doing? British him tune. There's nothing like
podcast present there I did.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
I feel like spittally.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
People look people in, unimportant, unimportant people in.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
I mean, I could creek.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
And if you love podcasts, mind your manners.
Speaker 2 (15:35):
Cool before you judge.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
I'll have you know that saying words is actually quite difficult,
as illustrated in this next clip. And that's just the
and that's just the beginning of an astonishing story. And
and a very long light and a very long light
and a very long night and a very long night
(16:01):
and a very long night at Ripley Castle, and a
very long night and a very long night of Ripley Castle.
Don't miss it until then, don't forget next year, Mark's
last seven hundredth.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
It's the words.
Speaker 8 (16:15):
Enough happen.
Speaker 12 (16:20):
Right stop.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
And if words weren't hard enough, I'm also expected to
pronounce posh people's names.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
That's a nightmare.
Speaker 1 (16:42):
This job is a nightmare. But before we go, do
you remember the story of Sir William Am Cotton. But
before we go, but before we get home, but before
we go, do you remember the story of Sir William
am Cott Ingleby? But before we go, do you remember
(17:03):
the story of Sir William Amcott. Fucking Jesus is stupid
posh cunts, these fucking ridiculous names. Just but before we go,
do you remember the story of Sir William Amcott.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
In fucking But before we go?
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Do you remember the story of Sir William Ancott, William Amcott,
Willy am Amcott in Willi am Amcott.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
That's fucking horrible.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
But before we go, do you remember the story of
William Amcott ingle Fucking these posh people and these stupid
fucking names, Sir William am Kott Ingleby? So William am
Kott Ingleby, that's not a name as a Welsh town.
But before we go, do you remember?
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Like I said, do you know?
Speaker 1 (17:47):
But before we go, do you remember the story of
Sir William and coott Ingley. I did eventually get the
names right, but it was at the expense of several
smash laptops and a very very exhausted producer. Like I said,
I blame the devil. I've never been anything short of professional.
During this series, not once have I ever smashed a
(18:09):
laptop or veered wildly off topic and gone down to
Kevin bacon rabbit hole during the.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
Middle of an interview.
Speaker 9 (18:14):
So great, great figure.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
Never killed anyone directly, but surely indirectly.
Speaker 9 (18:22):
I mean, yeah, but we've all done that indirectly, haven't we.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
We've all killed someone indirectly?
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Have we done?
Speaker 9 (18:30):
How many removes can we go to? Here?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
Have you your full six degrees of separation?
Speaker 9 (18:35):
Then six degrees of separation?
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Well, yeah, my dad's the exit of the British military,
so I think.
Speaker 9 (18:41):
I think that, yeah, you're probably you're probably two steps
away in that course. Then yeah, yeah, with Kevin Bacon,
do you successfully are there?
Speaker 1 (18:48):
I reckon, Kevin Bacon is the lynchpin of every game
of six Degrees of Separation.
Speaker 9 (18:54):
By which the whole cosmos turns. There at the middle
is Kevin Bacon. Don't ask me to link to medieval
members of the Percy family, but I, with enough thought
we could probably get there.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
Part of me really wants to try and do that.
Can we try and link Kevin Bacon to a member
of the Percy family?
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Okay, go on, try I'm interested.
Speaker 9 (19:17):
Okay, So Kevin Bacacon was in x Men First Class
with Michael.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
It's a great start. I love it. Al, okay, so
straight to Michael Fassbender.
Speaker 9 (19:25):
Yeah, Fastbender was in right, we can go two ways
with Fastbender. We can either go Fastbender was in X
Men Apocalypse with Oscar Isaac, who was in June with
Timothy Shallomey who played Henry the Fifth in the King,
which starts with the rebellion of Harry Hotspur of the Percys.
Speaker 1 (19:44):
You've absolutely nailed that without even that's that is very
impro I'm gonna give you a roundom applause.
Speaker 9 (19:49):
Thank you so much, thank you.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
That was so quick.
Speaker 8 (19:52):
Well, I know, Kevin Bacon, I guess yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:55):
Well, also we should mention you are you do do
a historical improv show where you should do six degrees
of Separation on it.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
That's a good game, six.
Speaker 9 (20:04):
Agreews of historical separation, but with Kevin Bacon in all.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Instances, but it all starts with Kevin.
Speaker 9 (20:10):
Bacon to Confucius, go.
Speaker 4 (20:13):
No.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
I love it so much in fact that if Bad
Manners doesn't get a second series, I'm pitching that as
a podcast idea. Look out, iHeart your numbers are about
to go through the roof.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
You're welcome.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
And finally, while we're on the topic of series two,
there are some promises I've made throughout this series that
I'm likely to break if we don't return. For example,
you might remember this ghost story from our Muncaster Castle episode.
Speaker 11 (20:49):
The Tapestry Room, which is our haunted room, or the
one that we used to put family friends in, but
we had too many people complaining that they couldn't sleep
because of a crying child, And of course the whole
thing was there was no crying child there. Lots of
these people had never met each other before, but they
would tell the same story that late in the night
(21:12):
they would start to hear a child crying, and supposedly
the bit that I like hate the love is that
it's fine the child crying. It's just when the nurse
starts singing to try and calm the child that people
get too freaked out and it becomes overwhelming.
Speaker 1 (21:29):
Well, I've never really been one to believe in that
kind of thing. In fact, I've been pretty dismissive of
the paranormal in general.
Speaker 8 (21:40):
Quite often a family member might inadvertently bring a spirit
with them.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Really.
Speaker 6 (21:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
In fact, I've been pretty dismissive of the paranormal in general. However,
my skepticism was all set to change when I met.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
This man, Bloody hell.
Speaker 4 (21:57):
Tom.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
That's writer, broadcaster and host of BBC's Uncanny podcast, Danny Robbins.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
Bloody hell all of us.
Speaker 1 (22:04):
The story of the crying girl, whose name was Susan
by the way, had all the hallmarks of an Uncanny episode,
multiple people experiencing the same thing, the history of the
castle corroborating the stories, and a very vivid personal story
from someone who worked there.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
So, in an attempt to.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Get me off the team, Skeptic Bench producer Chris thought
I should approach it with an open mind. So I
presented Danny with the story to see if it was
worth investigating, and here's what he had to say.
Speaker 3 (22:33):
I'd love to know more about this. Basically, you get
back on to him, but you know, because Susan feels
like a name from the kind of you know, more
from a kind of twentieth century name to me. But
then I think there's a good story here. I think again,
going back to that that desire for as humans to
impose stories on things, you know, you know how much
to what extent are we sort of taking these things
and joining the dots and putting them together. But you've
(22:54):
got a lot of strange activity associated with that room,
and it's happening to a lot of different people, to
a lot of different people at different times of their
lives and different times of the castle's history, and it's
frightening them. And I think, you know, we need to
take that seriously.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
I think, so take it seriously. I did. I made
this promise at the end of the episode, rest.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Assured I am now a new man, open minded and
ready to investigate. So join me on a future episode
where I'll be taking everything Danny has taught me today
and applying it to this compelling case. So am I
a man of my word like the Joker? Or am
I just making stuff up like the Joker? You'll have
to stay tuned to find out. Ooh, so, how's that
(23:37):
for a cliffhanger? Take that Game of Thrones or Breaking
Bad or whichever series you watch that's known for cliffhangers.
But seriously, do stay subscribed to Bad Manners, and I
hope we'll see all again soon. It's honestly been a
real pleasure and a privilege to bring you all of
these stories over the last year. So thank you for
listening and for all your kind words. That's all we've
got time for this series, So for the last time ever.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
For now Mind your Manners.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
Thanks for listening to Bad Manners. If you like the pod,
please share it with your friends, Rate it on the
iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Leave a review, and make sure you spill the tea
on any of your favorite bad Manners that we could
feature in future episodes. This podcast was produced by Atamei
Studios for iHeartRadio. It was hosted by me Tom Horton.
(24:29):
It was produced by Willie Lensky, Rebecca Rappaport, and Chris Ataway.
It was executive produced by Face Steur and Zad Rogers.
Our production manager is Caitlin Paramore and our production coordinator
is Bellasolini.
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