Becoming Sofi Fowler: The Neovagina Episode

In this episode, Carmen and Janie sit down with their friend Sofi Fowler (The Robin Shakedown Band, Three Women The Band) who has just had her bottom surgery 4 weeks prior. In this fun chat, we make a few detours to discuss our favorite movies while masterfully staying on the main topic: Sofi's Neovagina! Listen to this episode to learn all about the ins and outs of bottom surgery for trans women.

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For more Beauty Translated, Carmen Laurent and Janie Danger visit: @beautytranslatedpod @thecarmenlaurent @janie_danger

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
I think trans is beautiful because it's kind of magic.
These things that we think are set in stone are
very kind of like fluid in the way and like changeable.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
At Janie, I'm okay, I'm tired. Yeah, I'm fucking I'm here,
but I'm really really excited for another episode of Beauty Translated.

Speaker 3 (00:40):
So excited.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
What have you been up to since last week's episode
came out.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
Since we recorded it, or since it came out? Because
I'm the chronology of my life is getting kind of
like fucked up. I feel like I'm in like a
Slaughterhouse five situation right.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Now, where we're switching timelines a lot.

Speaker 3 (01:00):
I feel like my life is like, I don't know,
one of those like rip off of pulp fiction movies
where there's like eight different stories happening at the same time.

Speaker 2 (01:09):
Well, Slaughterhouse five is very fitting just thematically for I've
never read it. I have no fucking clue what it's about.
Most of the references that you make, Janey, I just
nod and smile and hope that it's something gay that
I will get.

Speaker 3 (01:24):
Yeah, you can just use context loose for most of
the real I mean, that's what I'm doing with the
plot of Slaughterhouse five, which I haven't read.

Speaker 2 (01:33):
I thought I assuming a trans woman getting her her vagina.

Speaker 3 (01:37):
Done, getting all five of her vaginas?

Speaker 2 (01:41):
Is that not what Slaughterhouse five is about?

Speaker 3 (01:44):
You know, I'm gonna I'm gonna be the bigger woman
here and admit I haven't read it, so probably I
don't know how to read. How about that?

Speaker 1 (01:54):
Yeah, I'm trying to one up here.

Speaker 3 (01:56):
That's what we call that. I haven't been doing shit, Carmen.
I work, and that's about it. I have anything exciting
right now. This is not a very exciting day for me.

Speaker 2 (02:06):
It's not an exciting time in general in the world.
It's just kind of like, you know, it's January.

Speaker 3 (02:11):
It's January. It's fuck you, it's January. It's cold. It's
very cold.

Speaker 2 (02:17):
It is, which is sitting in a brass bra which.

Speaker 3 (02:20):
You're getting a lot of mileage out of I am
always getting is absurd amount.

Speaker 2 (02:28):
If I had a sound I just want like a
soundboard and we can get a sound I could make
a soundboard. That would be one of my soundboard sounds.
My other one I would want would be ship fire
and save matches. But it's got to be real country
like ship far and safe matches.

Speaker 1 (02:45):
I hate that.

Speaker 3 (02:46):
I like it, it's just fun. I don't like that
it's just fun to say. I don't like the old
Southern women saying ship that sounds gross. Was to light
the match off of the fart fire shipping file is absurd?

Speaker 2 (03:02):
Ship fire, safe matches?

Speaker 3 (03:03):
All right? You keep.

Speaker 1 (03:09):
Okay? Sorry?

Speaker 2 (03:10):
Do you not have a silly little saying to contribute
to this mess?

Speaker 3 (03:13):
A silly little saying before.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
We let the guests take it away with our interview.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
I one of my favorite sayings is being like, this
is just like the plot of Slaughterhouse five. That's one
of my famous sayings.

Speaker 1 (03:27):
What if her favoite Janie.

Speaker 2 (03:29):
She's always saying, She's always saying, this dinner is just
like the plot of Slaughterhouse fives.

Speaker 3 (03:34):
Oh, this scrumptious dinner. It's just like the flow of
Slaughterhouse five.

Speaker 2 (03:39):
Well, Janie, thank you for entertaining me on that foray
into Carmenisms and jeneisms.

Speaker 3 (03:45):
I think, if I, if I remember correctly, we me
you and Sophie had we started this with one of
my It was a bit that was going through my
head for a while. So if I may, Yeah, I may,
because you normally do this, but if I may, for once,
please introduce, please enjoy our interview with Sophie Fowler, friend

(04:11):
of the show. Awesome interview. We talk a lot about surgery,
a topic that you know, I talk about David Cronenberg
a lot, but I don't actually talk about the specific
topic of surgery because it kind of freaks me out.
So trigger warning if it freaks you out too.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
We're here today with our friend, Sophie Fowler. And Sophie
is a friend of the pod. She's a friend of
past guest Robin Danger, with no affiliation to Janey Danger whatsoever.
I like her, though, I know, yeah, you two should
collad you two should collab.

Speaker 3 (04:47):
I want to play a show with her one day.
I just haven't found like that right, Yeah, I don't know,
maybe like more of a festival thing, like something that
would fit more together. But yeah, shout out to her.
She's cool.

Speaker 4 (04:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (04:57):
And so Sophie's in your band is three women in
the band.

Speaker 1 (05:02):
So I'm in two bands, three Women in the Band
and then the Robin Chakedown Band with both with Robin.

Speaker 3 (05:08):
Is that a reference to the John Cassavetes movie Three
Women so.

Speaker 1 (05:12):
It's actually a Robert Altman movie.

Speaker 3 (05:14):
Oh that's right. Sorry, Oh yeah, that's her bag. Look
at me trying to I should have figured that was
Cassavetes for some reason. It has a similar vibe.

Speaker 1 (05:23):
Yeah, yeah, I.

Speaker 3 (05:24):
Think I used to confuse that. And also the movie Sisters,
the Brian de Palmer movie, that's very different.

Speaker 2 (05:30):
Yeah, everybody in this room has a letterbox account.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
Everybody, And that's the last one.

Speaker 3 (05:34):
That's the only one I see.

Speaker 2 (05:36):
Can you tell everybody? That occurs like a not a
movie person. So he's totally oblivious.

Speaker 3 (05:41):
Oh that sucks.

Speaker 1 (05:43):
He's cycles.

Speaker 2 (05:45):
So, Sophie, thank you for being with us here today.
And you reached out to me and you said and
I was very glad you did, of course, because you
said you wanted to come on and talk about your
recent bottom surgery that you just had.

Speaker 3 (05:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:58):
So I was just sitting in the hospital watching hours
and hours of vander Pump Rules and just like, you
know what, I want to talk about this experience of
I feel like a lot of people want bottom surgery,
but I want to, like, I don't want to sugarcoat it.
It's not like an easy process. There's a lot of hurdles,

(06:19):
you have to go through, lots of logistics you have
to figure out, but it's worth it in the end. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
Yeah, So I'm excited to talk about it with you today,
But I guess before we get into your story about
your surgery and how you got here and all of that,
do you want to tell us a little bit about
your journey and deciding you wanted to transition and then
deciding you wanted bottom surgery, Like, just tell us about
all of that.

Speaker 1 (06:44):
So basically, like a lot of people, the pandemic hit,
I'm just sitting at home nothing to do for the
first time in like my whole life. I was not
going to school, i wasn't going to work. You know,
I'm just sitting at home and sitting with your thoughts
like that, and like not having to put up the performance.

(07:06):
You kind of just like it starts to deconstruct and
break down and then like it just was kind of revealed,
like I got to do this, I got a transition. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (07:15):
Well, so you are, and we've talked a lot about
it on the podcast in the past. You are a
part of the Great egg Cracking of twenty twenty, where
lots of people were in that same situation where they
were at home with their thoughts for the first time
and they realized like, oh, I haven't been living my

(07:36):
life like I want to. So you came to that
decision in twenty twenty. Wow, And I just have to say, like,
did you like get on the waiting list right away?

Speaker 1 (07:46):
Was that?

Speaker 5 (07:47):
So? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (07:48):
That is kind of a short period of time.

Speaker 2 (07:50):
Because yeah, three, I mean, I'm not saying that that's an.

Speaker 3 (07:54):
Yeah, no, not to be judgment.

Speaker 2 (07:55):
That's amazing, that's fantastic that you had the because even
I having transition for like fifteen whatever years now, haven't
haven't gotten there yet, And so it takes a lot
of dedication and like the hurdles you have, do you
want to talk about just like what the process of
even getting yourself to a consultation is, Like.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
Yeah, so I basically just did a bunch of research,
looked up like every surgeon I could find on the internet,
and the closest surgeon to Atlanta is in Nashville. Yeah,
and I looked up this surgeon. Yeah. Yeah. It's it's
a shame that Atlanta doesn't have somebody doing bottom surgery

(08:38):
at Vanderbilt University. At Vanderbilt in Nashville.

Speaker 3 (08:41):
We've talked about Tennessee a handful of times.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
We have talked about Tennessee a lot, and Sophia a
very hitler zone. Yeah, and Sophie and I actually we
have a little bit to talk about Tennessee if we can.
I want to do a little a little flashback to
when we went to Nashville. But so you had your
bottom surgery there in Nashville, and that is what's crazy, Like,
like during my consultation the same day in downtown Nashville,

(09:06):
there was a protest organized I think by Matt Walsh,
friend of the show, end of the show, against like
Vanderbilt's bottom surgery, like the whole transgender surgeries that they
provide at Vanderbilt, right, right, So it was just like
the surreal thing. I'm seeing billboards advertising this protest as

(09:29):
I'm driving up my consultation.

Speaker 3 (09:32):
Oh my god, Yeah they're baby killer.

Speaker 2 (09:38):
So yeah, that's like obviously crazy and intense. Like I
couldn't even imagine like pursuing, yeah, bottom sworgery in an
environment like that.

Speaker 1 (09:48):
But.

Speaker 3 (09:49):
I feel like I'd be a little like defiant about it, right, Yeah,
I throw my balls at them when I leave.

Speaker 2 (09:59):
I I've talked about in the past about how crazy
it is that Atlanta is in the South. Atlanta is
a hub for like gay and trans people essentially, but
there are no hospitals here that will allow surgeons to
perform bottom surgery exactly. Yeah, and so that's why there

(10:20):
are no there is no one providing bottom surgery here
in Georgia. Apparently Emory I've heard whatever.

Speaker 3 (10:28):
That's no, it wasn't allowed.

Speaker 2 (10:29):
It's not allowed, like none of the hospitals that are
here will allow surgeons to perform it because of like whatever.
I don't fucking know.

Speaker 1 (10:38):
It's crazy.

Speaker 2 (10:39):
But so yeah, for those of you that don't know,
like trans women in Atlanta and in lots of places
in the South, we do have to travel to be
able to have the surgery. So traveling is obviously one
hurdle that you have to overcome. But were you covering
this with insurance?

Speaker 1 (10:56):
So it was kind of a complicated thing to get
like the entry parents sorted out because it's out of state,
so that was kind of a complex thing just dealing
with that and then calling the hospital and the clinic
and everything, and just making phone calls after phone calls
to sort things out. And unfortunately I spent one extra

(11:17):
night in the hospital. I prepaid for surgery, got insurance, whatever.
But my last night I was about to be discharged
and I had a fever that night, so they kept
me an extra day and I got a bill yesterday
for the one extra night in the hospital one hundred

(11:38):
and twenty two thousand dollars. Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (11:40):
Absolutely insane. Wow, but yes, absolutely, just.

Speaker 3 (11:45):
Signal translated to just don't.

Speaker 1 (11:47):
I've been doing it.

Speaker 3 (11:49):
Why did you don't? They're not? What are they going
to break your legs? I will have to go back
with off.

Speaker 1 (11:54):
They're gonna like you know, do They're going to do
a fallow plastic see yeah, repo the Genetic Pussy Opera.

Speaker 2 (12:05):
Sorry, that's a really deep cut.

Speaker 1 (12:06):
I love that, I go That movie has been on
my watch list. So you've never seen it? I have, no.
I love it. It's so corny. I love it.

Speaker 2 (12:12):
I used to like watch it a lot, and I
like know I was very corny anyway.

Speaker 3 (12:18):
Got such a fag.

Speaker 1 (12:19):
I know Paris Helton's in that movie though, Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (12:23):
Yes, Neil Patrick Harrows right, No, the guy who plays
one of the doctors from Doctor Who is in it.
I think, does doctor who do bottom surgery, you know
he should go around Turf Islands?

Speaker 1 (12:39):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (12:39):
Actually so yeah, let's okay. So you have to travel
to Nashville and just even just getting the letters, there's
two letters you have to get.

Speaker 1 (12:48):
Yes, So I have a therapist in Atlanta. I went
to him. He wrote a letter. I've been seeing him
since my I started my transition. Then I had to
drive to Chattanooga to be in the state of Tennessee
to do a video call with Vanderbilt's Behavioral Health Clinic
to get my second letter. Okay, so I pulled into

(13:11):
a Chick fil A right across the border. There's a
Chick fil A pulled into the Chick fil A parking lot,
use their Wi Fi to get my second letter.

Speaker 2 (13:20):
That's fabulous.

Speaker 1 (13:21):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (13:22):
And so when did you begin the whole process if
you had to say, like when did the whole process
from like consultation to having your surgery? You just had
your surgery? What a month ago?

Speaker 1 (13:32):
Now? Four weeks ago today? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (13:34):
Congratulations, thanks, congratulations.

Speaker 1 (13:37):
So actually my first consultation was last October, so it
has been it was about a year. A lot of
that was like nine months of hair removal, getting laser, electrolysis, organizing,
making sure I have like accommodations, making sure like I
have a friend that's going to be in the hospital

(13:58):
with me, my parents came up, just organizing all that
right logistically. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (14:04):
And so that waiting period, I mean, obviously you're doing
a lot of work, and I'm thinking about my I'm
in my own waiting right now, my own limbo right now.
How was that process for you? Was it agonizing?

Speaker 1 (14:16):
There was moments I've kind of like doubt, like, am
I just rushing this? Am I doing this too fast?
But the fact that I've been like thinking about this
for three years and like going through the pain of
like laser and electrolysis, just sitting there like while somebody's
like electrocuting, you know, your your private party, each individual

(14:40):
hair follicle. Yeah, yeah, you know, you have a lot
of time to think there. And if you can make
it through that, I think you're dedicated enough, right exactly.

Speaker 3 (14:51):
Yeah, why do they have to do laser on your
genitals before? And I just I don't understand.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
So I had the penile incision, so basically they just
flip it inside out.

Speaker 3 (15:05):
I think I get a so you don't want hair
inside of you. It's like an we all hate having
an in grown hair.

Speaker 2 (15:15):
Yeah, yeah, and so yeah, if you and we can
talk about that too. I mean, most surgeons in the
US are going to require that you have a laser
or an electrolysis and like a specific area in your
genital so that inside the vagina no hair is going
to grow. There are some surgeons too, It's harder to

(15:36):
find in the US, but it's very popular in Thailand
where they'll do follicular scraping in surgery.

Speaker 1 (15:43):
So my surgeon actually did that for most Like he
specified like certain areas I have to do electrolysis, everything else, he.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
Did follicular scraping. That's beautiful.

Speaker 3 (15:55):
I love that.

Speaker 2 (15:56):
So you didn't even have to do like as much
as you might have had to have done. What is
vellicular scrapings, Like it's a surgical techniccalating, Yeah, yeah, it's
a surgical technique where when they are performing surgery on
those two like they have the tissues outside of the
body and they literally are below like the top layer

(16:19):
of the skin, and they're scraping away the follicles and
killing the follicles so that it's tissue without a very
hardcore Yeah, it's like tissue without a follicle so that
it'll be completely hairless, which is what electrolysis does.

Speaker 1 (16:35):
But it, uh, you know, it's like each individual hair. Yeah,
unless they're just like taking that chainsaw and just sh.

Speaker 3 (16:42):
Yeah, like like mowing the grass, like when you put
the mower to like the lowest setting.

Speaker 1 (16:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:48):
Yeah, so that's one on one about not having hair
in your vagina. Yeah. So yeah, the process took about
a year from the time you had your concation to
the time that you had surgery. And when did you know,
when did you even have a date?

Speaker 1 (17:05):
Probably I would say I got my date and maybe
August or so. Yeah, so about two and a half
months out. Okay, Yeah, so that whole time you're preparing
your don't really know when it's going to happen, but
you know it's going to happen. I had, like said
sometime in October, and then they came back to dates

(17:26):
October twenty fourth or the Friday the thirteenth, or.

Speaker 3 (17:32):
Did you do it on thirteen?

Speaker 1 (17:34):
I did it on the twenty fourth. Spooky for me.

Speaker 3 (17:38):
I'm not a superstitious person, but getting your pussy on
Friday the thirteenth. Yeah, I should get a pizza, but
I don't know if I want to order my pussy though.

Speaker 2 (17:48):
Sophie texted the group chat, should I get my pussy
on brid and I was like, no, absolutely, absolutely not,
it can wait until the twenty fourth.

Speaker 3 (17:56):
Yes, you get a tattoo on Friday the wee Yes, yeah.

Speaker 1 (18:00):
But thirteen dollars exactly.

Speaker 3 (18:02):
So I'm glad something you'll probably regret more than getting
your genitals removed.

Speaker 2 (18:06):
And right, oh yeah, I loved it when you sent
us a screenshot of the surgical rundown. Essentially, it was like.

Speaker 1 (18:15):
Like it was looked like a hardcore emo punk fan lineup.

Speaker 3 (18:19):
It was like, yeah, it was like like a poster
for like like like a black model there. Yeah, ripping
out the follicles, flipping in the pen.

Speaker 1 (18:31):
Amputation, pen islan version or chay ectomy like all of that.

Speaker 3 (18:36):
Yeah, that's dope.

Speaker 2 (18:45):
So we went to Nashville before your surgery, which was
a lot of fun. We went to see Ethel Caine.

Speaker 3 (18:50):
I knew, ye, Yes, we went to see Ethel Cain
with who who was she playing with? Karmel?

Speaker 2 (18:58):
I think her name was Caroline Puli Check pulp to
check though before.

Speaker 3 (19:05):
Oh my god, I'm going to kill both of you.
Why why didn't you just stay for her? You went
all the way to Nashville.

Speaker 1 (19:13):
I don't know why didn't we I think we want
to go to lesbian bar? We did?

Speaker 3 (19:17):
We didn't. You're not even a lesbian.

Speaker 1 (19:20):
I have fun? Yeah, May got May was flirting a
little bit.

Speaker 2 (19:26):
Oh yeah, we got hit on it. Then the second
we told the girl we were trans, she was like,
all of a sudden, just like not interested.

Speaker 3 (19:33):
Didn't you have May on the show? Yes, the first
time we ever met. She like was hitting on me
like instantly, and.

Speaker 1 (19:41):
Yeah, you made out?

Speaker 3 (19:42):
Yes, I think I think we did. She's I think
she says that it's very possible we did. I don't
remember all I remember. Let's just say we did, but
I remember I was. I had to walk my friend
of the car because she was really drunk, and she
was like, are you coming back?

Speaker 1 (19:58):
Oh my god, I'm back.

Speaker 3 (20:00):
And then I came back and she's like like scream
sobbing to my friend like student. I was like, all right,
I'm just gonna go.

Speaker 1 (20:11):
That sounds like make halloway for us.

Speaker 3 (20:13):
Yeah, hell yeah, I think it's a funny story, one
of the most lesbian stories you can think of.

Speaker 2 (20:19):
She has a lot of sapphic yearning for a girl
who is straight.

Speaker 1 (20:24):
I sexual.

Speaker 3 (20:26):
No, that's that's a very good way to describe me too.

Speaker 2 (20:30):
She totally called herself bisexual at the Lesbian.

Speaker 1 (20:32):
Bar and I've killed me. Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (20:34):
I was like, Wow, that's the first time you've ever
told anyone you're bisexual before, mate.

Speaker 1 (20:39):
It is a big coming out moment. Yeah, at the
at the lesbian bar. But yeah.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
We went to Nashville to see Ethel Caine, which was
kind of fun because it was sort of like a, oh,
I'm going to be coming here in a few months,
you know. For Sophie, it was sort of like a
it was a fun girls trip, you know, the three
of us, me, you and may I know.

Speaker 1 (20:57):
It's a it's I've like had to travel to Nashville
like five times in the past year just for consultations
and follow ups, so it's become kind of like us
and I lived there for three months a couple of
years ago, so it's kind of become like the special
place I have. My favorite vegan restaurant is there.

Speaker 6 (21:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (21:16):
My favorite movie is Nashville set there.

Speaker 5 (21:19):
So.

Speaker 2 (21:21):
Yeah, that's right. We went to the Parthenon. Yes, that
was so much fun. But yeah, like Nashville is a
really special city. I like it a lot too. And
you've got me wanting to get bottom surgery in Nashville. Vanderbilt,
let's just talk about for a minute. So when Matt
Walsh was there protesting blah blah blah blah blah. I
don't know exactly what the story is, but Vanderbilt they

(21:44):
just like gave over like a whole registry of people.

Speaker 1 (21:48):
What is that about. Yeah, so basically I don't know
the full how it works. But now that I've had
bottom surgery, you're on a round Nashville, the state of Tennessee.
Nor Billy he like has my name and the dress
and you're pussy has like a little barcode inside. Yeah,
he's you know, he's got a binder full of women Like.

Speaker 2 (22:12):
Yeah, and that's kind of scary to think about. I mean,
we're joking about it, but like it's scary to think
about the fact that like they've just like given over
without even like needing to be subpoenaed. Uh, they just
so like here, here's everyone, We've ever given a sex
change at our hospital before.

Speaker 3 (22:29):
We We've talked about this a few times on the
show before too, but like it is very like, I
don't know, it is very scary how much especially this year,
Like we talked about this during like the Pride and
like how like weird and.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
The targets were being bombed, Like.

Speaker 3 (22:45):
Yeah, like just how much people capitulated to right wing psychopaths,
whether it was like you know, bud Light with Dila
Molvany or Target being like so we moved our Pride
section to get it away from normal people so you
don't have to see that yucky that yucky ship.

Speaker 1 (23:02):
They've got it. It's like the old movie Rentals story, right,
the gay Right, you know.

Speaker 3 (23:08):
I went and the target I was. I was in
there like like like the meme of the game Dune,
like where's the Pride section? But I went, I was like,
where's where's the tucking underwear? I couldn't find it. I'll
find the the tucking underwear for children, like.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
Yeah, yeah, the one that couldn't find it for adults either,
for eighteen month olds. Yeah right, that's so that's I know.
It was insane and I actually avoided Target that entire
month and now they have the gay Nutcracker they do,
which is.

Speaker 3 (23:42):
The Nutcracker has always been a little fruity. Let's be real.
He was black Nutcracker. The Nutcracker.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
Come on, I call my surgeon.

Speaker 2 (23:51):
Yeah, okay, so yeah, let's get back more into the surgery.
Let's talk more about the surgery. So you had your surgery.
I was October twenty first. That was twenty fourth, twenty four,
twenty fourth, that's ritten.

Speaker 1 (24:02):
Yeah. So the day before, me and my best friend
we drove up to Nashville, got a hotel just kind
of like hung out. And it was a tough day
because you have to take bowel prep. They you know,
want you all cleared up. So we're in the hotel room.
I am just like shitting my brains out. Everything's coming out.

(24:23):
I'd fasted for like two days, and we're watching the
Notebook and I can see it from the toilet of
crying and like from the movie. So it was it
was an emotional day, I.

Speaker 2 (24:36):
Can say have I mean, I would have probably passed
out if I didn't get to eat for two days.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
Yeah, So I did eat some broth of miso soup.
Didn't get to eat the little tofu bits though. Wow, yeah,
and so did you have to discontinue your estrogen and
stuff or is that for two days before and then
the whole time I was in the hospital. Okay, Yeah,
so I was in the hospital eight days.

Speaker 3 (24:59):
I thought it was I mean, this could be like
an antiquated thing. But I thought that like for surgery,
you have to, like like my friends Olivia had to
like stop estrogen for like a month before her like
breast augmentation.

Speaker 1 (25:12):
That was my fear, and I like reached out to
my surgeon and asked, and I guess it's kind of
an antiquated thing, but there's it's a blood thinner kind
of thing or plants or something.

Speaker 3 (25:23):
Yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 2 (25:24):
I guess they've determined I think, yeah, it's like an
antiquated thing, and like more recently they've stopped doing it
for as long because I think that they've determined that
it's like more detrimental for you to be like completely
hormonally imbalanced.

Speaker 3 (25:37):
Yeah, like that's kind of what I would think. Yeah,
it's it's hard to tell. With a lot of like
trans healthcare, what like is like a sensible like precaution
or like measure and what is just like I don't know,
like doctors being like too lazy to like actually figure
out like what the best thing for a trans person

(25:59):
would be.

Speaker 1 (26:00):
Yeah, they're like still have the mentality it's like the nineties,
yeah something.

Speaker 3 (26:05):
Yeah, it's for someone like me. It's hard for me
to like like find what's like valuable information because like
I don't want to trust like a medical system that
doesn't like, you know, fully understand my needs. And I
also don't want to just trust like autistic furries on

(26:27):
the Internet.

Speaker 5 (26:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (26:28):
So I did a lot of like research. I've looked
at a bunch of like subreddits like of hearing different
people's surgery journeys and like and the lead up to
it and after surgery, just looking up what to expect.
But and it was just everything was different some people.
I was back to work in like six days, and
some people are like, oh, I've been in bed bound

(26:50):
for two years. Yeah, so you just you don't know, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (26:58):
Yeah, And so I mean that. I mean you can
literally go on to Reddit and you can type in
the name of any surgeon onto Reddit and you will
find people talking about their experiences, sharing photos, you know,
answering questions about their experiences with that particular surgeon. And
if you can't, that's probably like I don't know, I wouldn't.

Speaker 3 (27:19):
There's like some trans women that talk about these surgeons
like they're like NBA players.

Speaker 1 (27:24):
Yeah, there's like the celebrity surgeons. There's like the famous ones,
like just saying their name.

Speaker 3 (27:29):
It's like, oh, yeah, I've never looked up a surgeon
because I'm like too. I mean, for one, I don't
really know if I want SRS that much. And also
I'm just way too poor to afford like a breast
augmentation or anything right now, so I just haven't even.

Speaker 2 (27:45):
Yeah, well, I mean for breast dog. For breast dog,
you can really have anyone do that, But for like
FFS and like Pussie, you really want to know who you're.

Speaker 3 (27:55):
Yes, see, I don't know if I would ever get
I would maybe get like a nose job, but mostly
just like fix my divia. It's up them. But that's
another thing for another day.

Speaker 2 (28:05):
Well, so you had to completely empty out your bowels.

Speaker 1 (28:11):
Yeah, yeah, where you want to.

Speaker 2 (28:16):
We had to completely empty out your bowels so that
you could be prepared for surgery in two days.

Speaker 1 (28:22):
Yeah, and then I get to the hospital Tuesday morning,
five am, just like the anxiety there, just waiting and waiting.
They pulled me back to the back room. Then they
give me some I believe vaaluumra. Yes. Yeah, so that
was really nice. I love that. And then like fifteen
different people come into like the room and start checking

(28:46):
on you, checking out me, like they're part of the
surgical team. So I learned that the surgeon he has
a whole surgical team, so he's not doing the entire surgery.
There's like six seven different doctors in the room that
are either observing or kind of learning, which is nice
because then hopefully that means there will be more surgeons

(29:08):
in the future.

Speaker 3 (29:09):
That's like a pussy workshop. Yeah yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (29:13):
Well so then once you went back, you knocked out.
You woke up like you'd never been asleep.

Speaker 1 (29:21):
It was like it was like I just had this
ten minute, very visceral dream. And then I'm like talking
to the anesthesiologists and he's getting married, like he was
telling me about that. As he's like wheeling me to
like the postop room, and I'm just like, what flowers
are you gonna do it? You just ask him, like,

(29:42):
oh my god, you should do hydranges.

Speaker 2 (29:45):
That's adorable.

Speaker 1 (29:46):
So you're all goofy and loopy, and then you look
down and there's I had a wound back on. I
have like four different like drains coming out. I have
a catheter coming out. So you don't get to see
your results right right away. It was probably for the
better day six when the wind back came off and

(30:07):
then I looked down and like just this joy like
just overcame me. And that was when I was like, Okay,
this was definitely worth it, this like indescribable feeling.

Speaker 2 (30:20):
And that's when we sent us photos, yes, and we
got to see the photos, and I was stunned, honestly
that you.

Speaker 1 (30:28):
Looked amazing. On day six.

Speaker 2 (30:30):
I was like holy shit, like wow, and the wound
back thing, I have to say that must be new too.

Speaker 1 (30:38):
Yeah, Like I when I was looking up different people's
surgery journeys and stuff, most people it was like day
one or day two that they got to see the
results right because they don't have a woundback.

Speaker 4 (30:49):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:50):
And I kind of preferred the wound back because I
think it kept it all clean, kept it like so
the swelling was going down exactly, and I think that's
why your results looked as good as they did on
day sex, and you didn't look like a mangled like Yeah.
I've seen like, you know, looked up like people's results
and it's like, oh god, this is yeah. And I
guess one of the interesting things about that for me

(31:11):
about this is, you know, having been transitioning for as
long as I have, I've been researching surgery for all
of that time, and I guess it's really interesting for
me to see how the surgery has advanced even in
just the amount of time that I've been researching it.
Because that woundback thing, I've never heard of that before.
And when I saw it on you know that they

(31:33):
had put that on, I was like, wow, that looks
like it's like going to be really helpful for everything. Yeah,
because I've seen some afters that were like the day
after that looked like really really really bad, you know. Yeah,
Like I don't understand people that like are just like
going home like they're thirty day. I know that's how

(31:54):
it was back in the days. I was literally trapped
in the bed, yeah for those five or sixteen Yeah,
and you didn't even walk until you're sixth day, right, Yeah. Yeah,
And what was that the first time you use the bathroom?
It was the same day, Yeah, and it was it
was interesting, you know, because I'm like, how the fuck

(32:14):
do you aim this thing for the first time? Yeah,
it's like like you know, a hose nozzle, Yeah, like
the jet one, and then I'm going to like the
soaker one where it just comes out like every direction.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
I've noticed when I use the ladies room that I
wonder if like turfs have ever like caught onto this,
because sometimes like I'll sit down pee and it's a
little and then the bitch next to me is like, yeah,
Like I wonder if anyone has ever like clocked a
trans woman by her her piss stream is too tight.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
That actually, I think is a thing, and I.

Speaker 3 (32:56):
Could figure it out, like.

Speaker 2 (32:59):
Clock practicing for years how to get my pist stream
to sound as natal females.

Speaker 3 (33:06):
Sneaking in like a cup of water to like don't there,
or or playing piss sounds on your phone like yeah
next to the the residents. Yeah, that's that's a vagina.

Speaker 2 (33:22):
Well, Sophie doesn't have to worry about that anymore. Yes, Well,
I guess backing up, you know, just to just to
kind of give I guess a little bit of perspective,
because we've talked about how much goes into this and
how much work prep and it's work that you have

(33:43):
to put in an order to be able to have
the surgery. What was the biggest motivating factor and what
was the thing that kept you going and reminding you like, Okay,
this is what I want. So just as I was transitioning,
you know, my body's starting to change, just like things
are looking different, and there's just this one part that's

(34:05):
just very incongruous with the rest. It wasn't like I
had intense bottom dysphoria and hated having a penis, but
it just like felt out of place. Yeah, and so esthetically,
aesthetically and just like mentally and just all of these
different ways, and I just was like, okay, it's got

(34:28):
to go. Like and then like now looking in the mirror,
things make so much more sense.

Speaker 1 (34:35):
Yeah, So happy for you. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (34:38):
So see, like bottom dysphoria is like something that I
relate to, just because it's the first type of dysphoria
that I can remember experiencing prior to experiencing puberty, and
that feeling of like it doesn't quite fit, not quite right,
and I can imagine you know, myself with something else

(35:00):
and liking that much more. Do you want to talk
a little bit about just like what the days after
we're like, I mean, so your sixth day, you finally
got up and you went pee and got to experience
your new stream and all that, and why don't we

(35:24):
talk about dilation?

Speaker 1 (35:26):
Yes, So dilation. It actually the first like week I
was dilating, it was like, oh, this is not bad
at all, Like I'm reaching the milestone and yeah. So
I was also kind of surprised because I'd read online
heard everything about like dilation is the worst, like blah

(35:47):
blah blah blah blah, and it just hasn't been too bad.
I think the worst part is it's just like a
hassle where it's like I'm just like chilling on the
couch with my friends. It's like, God, I have to
fucking get my like dog peepad out for all the
like loop discharge and loop that comes out. H got

(36:10):
to like clean my dilators, got to like set up,
got to get the mirror like my pillows, and then
the clean up after. So it's like I'm only dilating
for you know, like fifteen minutes, three times a day,
three times a day, but then the whole process takes
like forty five minutes just to set up and getting
everything cleaned out, so it's more just like a inconvenience

(36:35):
at this point.

Speaker 3 (36:36):
How long do you have to do that?

Speaker 1 (36:38):
So three days, three times a day for three months,
and then down to one time a day for like
six months, and then I think it kind of like
you taper off from there. As long as you're as
long as something's coming in there once a week, you're
probably good. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (36:55):
And the biggest you know issue, I mean, the reason
you want to dilate, and if you neglect your dial,
you lose vaginal depth, which.

Speaker 3 (37:03):
If you wanted to be deep, yeah, I wanted to
take if that baby's over, biggest possible.

Speaker 2 (37:08):
I'm sorry, but I'm not getting a vagina and not
sit on some dicks. So yeah, I think you should
definitely try to have as much vaginal depth as you can.

Speaker 1 (37:18):
Yeah, And my mom she told me like she was
all worried, like, you know, you have to dilate like
three times a day, Like are you going to be
able to keep up with that? You never even wore
your retainer.

Speaker 3 (37:30):
You know that's so true.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
Well, you know, it's funny though, Like I was thinking,
I thought about this was a consideration I had in
a different lifetime. Like, so, I actually about eight years ago,
I guess seven or eight years ago, I made a
down payment with Marcie Bowers, famous NBA celebrity, she really is,
made a down payment with Marcy Bowers. I had both

(37:54):
my letters and everything was good to go, except my
insurance denied my surgery, so I didn't get surgery, which
I'm kind of glad because Marcy Bowers is no longer
my preferred surgeon. So yeah, at that time, when I
was an esthetician, I was like, when the fuck am
I going to be able to dilate three times a day? Yeah,
because there was no way with my job and my

(38:16):
lifestyle that that was ever going to be possible.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
Yeah, So, like I'm trying to. My goal is to
get back to work by the end of this month.
I work at a flower shop plant store, so I'm
on my feet all day, so it's going to be tough.
But like, thankfully, my job is very accommodating and I'll
be able to work like kind of shorter shifts to
fit in dilating right, at least for the first couple

(38:41):
of months and then just take it from there.

Speaker 3 (38:43):
How long were you off work?

Speaker 1 (38:45):
So I will probably be off work a total of
like five weeks or so five and a half. I'm
not terrible.

Speaker 3 (38:55):
No, I wouldn't be able to fucking pay rounds if
I was off work like two weeks even so.

Speaker 2 (39:00):
You had to I'm sure save said a lot of money.

Speaker 3 (39:02):
Yeah, I did not.

Speaker 1 (39:05):
I did, like got people to like chip in for
food when I was like, you know, because I couldn't
drive for the first three or four weeks, so like
just people, I've had people bring by food and stuff
and it's been like really nice. Yeah I haven't. I'm sorry,

(39:27):
And like the other side of town, I do. I do.
I've been like I was.

Speaker 2 (39:32):
I was like, we're going to come see you in
Nashville while you're in the hospital. We're going to come
visit you. And I was just like, well, we'll talk
to you from the but no, can we talk about sensation.
Have you had an orgasm?

Speaker 1 (39:50):
No? Not yet? I did so yesterday I had my
second follow up appointment and the doctor like, you know,
he's got the speculum in there. He's poking around doing whatever.
And then he asked like, oh, well, have you had
any platoral sensation yet? And I have. I was like, no,
I haven't. I haven't even like tried to dig around

(40:13):
to find it yet.

Speaker 3 (40:14):
Just sounds like the setup to like a porno simulation.

Speaker 1 (40:18):
Well let's let's try that out. So then he like
kind of like put a finger and like like touched
it a little bit.

Speaker 2 (40:25):
I was like, he touched your clip. Yeah, the doctor
touched your clip.

Speaker 1 (40:31):
Yeah, so it was it was quite a sensation. So
I'm excited, and you know, I'm probably it's still probably
a few few weeks on the road before before any orgastles.

Speaker 2 (40:43):
Right, any fireworks?

Speaker 1 (40:45):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
Sorry, I don't know if that's sort of a question
to ask, but I do know that, like they say,
you should start playing around on there pretty early on
to get those get those the neural pathways. I want
you to start a good Yeah, you start gooning as
soon as you get home.

Speaker 3 (41:06):
Actually get used to it.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
Your new life now, gooning and dilating.

Speaker 3 (41:13):
Have you guys seen the movie The Skin I Live on?
Scarlett Johansson one, No, it's under it's a pedro.

Speaker 1 (41:22):
That movie yeah, yeah, is it the one that we watched,
So it's someone like the training, like creating a whole
new faces.

Speaker 3 (41:34):
It's very true. I mean I don't really like it,
to be honest, but I don't like it because I
was going to mention it for a few reasons. But one,
it's the first movie that I ever saw a dilater
and and it was also.

Speaker 2 (41:47):
I saw one and that was the first time on
trans America.

Speaker 1 (41:50):
Oh my god.

Speaker 3 (41:50):
Sorry, Oh yeah, we've talked about we should we should
do some more movie episodes so we can get fuller
into this areon.

Speaker 6 (41:57):
Hell.

Speaker 3 (41:57):
Yeah, it's basically a like a kind of a mad
Scientist movie where this guy, I'm about to spoil the
whole movie, so if you want to see this, like ski,
but it's like about this like mad Scientists played by
Antonio Banderas who like this guy like rapes his daughter
and so he like kidnaps him and like basically like

(42:19):
force him and turns him into a woman. And it's
very unrealistic like the first Like I mean, it's like
a soap opera because yeah, exactly exactly. It's I just
don't know if I particularly like the idea of like
forced feminization as like punishment for me.

Speaker 1 (42:40):
I just really the.

Speaker 3 (42:42):
Thing is, I just find that very silly.

Speaker 1 (42:44):
That's getting a little into the crossroad.

Speaker 4 (42:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (42:48):
Once I realized what the movie was doing is like
it's making this guy a beautiful man into a beautiful
woman like candy. But it is kind of a it's
kind of it's a movie like that where it's someone
in captivity having things forced upon their body.

Speaker 2 (43:07):
So Pedro Alamavar really likes. He's like a fascination.

Speaker 3 (43:10):
He translat.

Speaker 1 (43:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 6 (43:11):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (43:12):
Since I've been at home, I've been just watching movies
all day, so I've watched a couple more of his.
I've seen like eight or nine of his movies.

Speaker 3 (43:19):
Now, I don't know, I haven't seen enough of his movies,
but I've liked a few that i've seen. I just
didn't really care for her skin. I live in that much.

Speaker 2 (43:28):
So you had your follow up yesterday. So you were
in Nashville again yesterday yesterday. Yeah, and my best friend,
one of my best friends, Robin, friend of the show,
friend of the pod. She came up because she may
be also like I want to, you know, let people
know what the reality is of bottom sorgry, Like it's not.

(43:50):
There's a lot of like things you just don't know
until you like ask people's like personal experience. Like if
you go on the internet, it's all like this either
random people and Reddit or like you know, all this
academic language about stuff. Yeah, and I don't think either
of those really captures what the reality is. And was

(44:11):
it anything that you thought it was going to be
or worse?

Speaker 1 (44:16):
So it's been like like there's things like if I
drop something on the ground, it's like, oh my god,
this is going to be like a grabber. I should
get a grammer. Putting on socks the worst. Yeah, So
there's just little things like you're kind of just I
was so used to just being able to do whatever

(44:37):
I want, being global and yeah yeah, but now it's like,
oh god, I'm kind of worn out after walking like
to the bathroom and stuff. Or when I was bedbound
in the hospital and my phone charger falls on the ground,
I'm like nurse. So it's a lot more like you're
a lot weaker than you expected to be and a

(45:00):
lot less mobile than you thought you'd be. And that's
all temporary, of course. Yeah, And it's like it kind
of feels like it's going to be forever. But even
compared to where I was last week to now, yeah,
I'm much more mobile, like I would not. I wasn't
able to drive until a couple of days ago, so
I drove here. Ya, So like there's a lot of

(45:21):
I'm able to get out and do stuff. So it
gets better.

Speaker 2 (45:24):
Yeah, well I'm happy it gets better.

Speaker 1 (45:27):
Kids.

Speaker 2 (45:28):
You heard it here first, So yeah, I'm really happy
to hear that. And I guess I mean, there's not
really a whole lot much else. We don't have any
further updates yet until you take that thing out for
a span.

Speaker 1 (45:40):
Yeah, so that's well, you call us. Yeah, can we
get a follow up? Yeah, I'm going to live stream it.

Speaker 3 (45:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (45:47):
Yeah, that's like another thing. Like so like I'm single
now and I'm like, like you guys hear them? Yeah, yeah,
anybody out there's.

Speaker 3 (45:58):
Bisexual, call the Beauty translated love line. We'll get you
on time.

Speaker 1 (46:04):
Actually we do have one now, please call us. But
like I've been thinking about, like do I want just
some random guy off of like Hide for Tender to
be the first guy to consecrate? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (46:17):
Yeah, do you treat it ask something very sacred? Or
do you treat it ask something very just kind of like.

Speaker 1 (46:22):
Yeah, so that's like something I'm kind of like, you know,
dealing with, Like do I want it to be like
a special moment losing my second virginityil do you.

Speaker 3 (46:33):
Also want to put that like I don't know the
way people like uh idolatrize like virginity, you know, like
like I.

Speaker 1 (46:42):
Don't want to put it on a pedestal, but like
I don't.

Speaker 3 (46:45):
I just made up a word.

Speaker 1 (46:46):
I was a good word.

Speaker 4 (46:59):
Well.

Speaker 1 (47:00):
Another aspect about being a trans woman who is postop
and something that we've all experienced as trans women are
most commonly fetishized for our penises yours now. So yeah, So,
like I was actually talking with a guy on Hinge,
I believe, and he was We were talking about movies.

(47:21):
We like, it was great conversations, talking for a couple
of days, and then I told him I was trans,
and like he was cool with how big is it? Yeah,
he was cool with it. Everything. Well it's six inches deep,
and like I, you know, had mentioned like how I'm
like recovering from a surgery, and then he asked what surgery.

Speaker 3 (47:43):
I told him it wasn't my wisdom, and then.

Speaker 1 (47:47):
He unmatched with me. Wow, it was cool with a
trans woman with a dick with a dick. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (47:53):
So yeah, and that's the thing, Like, that's the reality
that a lot of us have to consider with surgery,
is that, like, like because you know, obviously that's one
of my goals one day, is that I want to
have surgery. But are men that thought I was desirable
as a trans woman before I had surgery going to

(48:13):
still be interested in me? And in most cases not.
But you gotta like realize, like, I'm doing this for me. Yeah,
it's not for like fuck all these you know, chasers
whatever out there, But you just gotta like, you know,
I'll find the right person exactly. You're going to find
somebody who loves you for for the person and the

(48:34):
woman that you are, not for the fact that you
had a penis at one point, you know, Yeah, exactly so,
and that's like what we're all looking for, you know,
out there in the world. So call us in the
Beauty Translated love line, Yes, do you have any other
things you want to say about your surgery? About your experience.

Speaker 1 (48:56):
It's tough, you know, it's it's a tough process, and
like you know, I had to like prepare getting money
saved up. I had to prepare like getting time off
of work. I had to get pet sitters, I had
to get you know, accommodations. There's just so many things
you have to consider. So I don't want anybody to

(49:17):
like rush into this. I want people to kind of
do their research and like I don't know, I'm like
happy to educate people, like I've wanted to be like
as open as possible. Like my friend who came to
my postop appointment yesterday, I invited her to like the
room if she wanted to like see what this process

(49:39):
is like, and she like saw me dilating and saw
like what this process is, you know, just because that's
the reality. It's not some kind of like fantasy thing.
I demystifies it a lot. Yeah, And with these types
of I think nowadays it's changing because there's becoming more
common and more like just like every day like that
people are getting to different like surgeries and stuff. But

(50:04):
definitely there's like this like air of like mystery around
like what is you know, bottom surgery and all of that.
Because like I love movies, So one of the movies
I watched a few week a few months ago. Myrabreckenridge
from nineteen seventy. Yeah, could considered.

Speaker 3 (50:23):
The Candy Darling movie.

Speaker 1 (50:25):
Right, she's a Quel Welch.

Speaker 3 (50:27):
Oh yeah, where she's like a Transloman.

Speaker 1 (50:29):
Yeah, so she, you know, is a man at first
goes into this crazy, weird surgery surreal set and like,
you know, it's just like this just the averagest looking
dude ever. And then it's Raquel and it's Raquel Welch
and you know that's.

Speaker 3 (50:50):
Basically what happened to you.

Speaker 1 (50:52):
Yeah, that's what I was hoping like surgery would do.
And it's that's not the reality, right, It's not like
a one you know second and you're good, right, and
the big scheme of things, it's a small part of
your transition when you've got so many other changes that
your body is going through and so many other things
like socially and met like all these other things that

(51:13):
are happening. So yeah, because like me and my friend
when we were in Nashville, we had some car trouble
along the way, so we dealt with like mechanics and
like tow truck drivers.

Speaker 2 (51:26):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (51:26):
And like it's very thumb on, Louise, Yes, very thumb
on Louise, and like our whole motto for the trip
was don't be clocky. Don't be clocky. Oh my god.
So we get like Darland a lot like that, all
these like you know, blue collar men are just like
you know, and that was it's a hard thing to

(51:47):
deal with, like when you're used to like just being
paranoid all the time, like am I passing? Am I passing?
Like like how do I how am I perceived around me?
And then all of a sudden it's like like, oh,
like I am passing, Like nobody's like really worried and stuff, right,
but you still have that paranoia anxiety. So it's a weird,

(52:11):
a weird transition there.

Speaker 3 (52:13):
Tells me all the time when I'm at work, I'm
always very worried about it. And then like I'm talking
to like a table of like six construction workers and
my Mom's like, I'm like, you said you wanted a
sweet teeth, Like it feels really good on in my opinion.

Speaker 2 (52:31):
Yeah, and yeah, I mean it is nice to just
be able to like forget about that, you know. And
I think it's one reason why I fantasize about just
going stealth after having.

Speaker 1 (52:41):
Myne Yeah, especially. Yeah, that's like because now it seems like, oh,
it's kind of like a possibility now, like I could
like go seuth, but then you lose your identity with
the trans community that I've kind of been somewhat somewhat
into the past few years.

Speaker 3 (53:01):
Yeah, I think that, like if you're like basing your
I don't know, if you're like a trans person that
is so I don't know, it's like the complete opposite
of like like there's like the uber Stacey assimilationists, and
then there's like the girl that's like no one should
pass ever. I don't know, I feel like, yeah, it's

(53:25):
some ship like that, Like I feel like we can
kind of meet somewhere along here, Like I don't think
you need to like base like who's in the trans
community and who's not by who passes it? Like shut up,
shut the fuck up, Like like just just shut up.
I shouldn't even have to explain why this all sounds stupid.
You just just just shut up. Let's all be nice

(53:47):
to each other. Yeah, we've all we've all gone through
a lot, I mean, and talking to you ladies like
about your like srs and stuff and making me realize
that like I am fake in a transen I'm a
bisexual trans identified.

Speaker 2 (54:02):
Male bisexuals are just confused.

Speaker 3 (54:09):
Well, that's true.

Speaker 1 (54:10):
I'm never gonna take a side.

Speaker 3 (54:12):
I have never been not confused in my life.

Speaker 2 (54:16):
So no, I'm not saying that that anyone should have
like have to live at stealth. I'm just saying that
there are times in my life when I I not
acknowledging my transness is very convenient.

Speaker 3 (54:27):
Oh, there's I think there's definitely like i'd say most
of the time I want to be stealth, but I
mean not saying, like other times I want to be
like clocky, but like there's definitely other times where like
I let my guard down and I don't feel like
I have to talk in my customer service voice, Like
I don't know, there's a lot of like because my

(54:47):
that's just my personal relationship with my trans womanhood, Like
I don't I don't know. Everyone's like a little different,
I guess, and that's okay, that's something that like should
be celebrated. I think.

Speaker 1 (54:59):
Yeah, Like there are aspects of the trans support and
community that I've had a lot of trans friends I've
got over the last couple of years, and it's amazing.
It's like, there are parts of this community that I
really love, but then when I'm at work walking down
the street, I just want to be like a normal girl.
I just want to blend in.

Speaker 3 (55:19):
Yeah, yeah, I totally get that.

Speaker 1 (55:22):
Yeah yeah, And that's all we're saying.

Speaker 2 (55:24):
Jane, Okay, I don't There's a lot of trans people
that like always want to talk about trans shit, and
I'm like, can we talk about Halo?

Speaker 6 (55:35):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (55:35):
Can we talk about.

Speaker 4 (55:38):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (55:40):
Yeah, Yeah, let's so, let's all dual wheeled the needler,
go out there, go to Matt Walsh's house, light them up.

Speaker 1 (55:50):
Yeah. Well, Sophie, thank you so much for being here.
Of course, thank y'all for having me.

Speaker 2 (55:56):
I really appreciate it. And in the spirit of what
I used to do in season one of the podcas
cast that I've just forgotten about. Is there anything that
you have to share about why you think being trans
is beautiful?

Speaker 1 (56:07):
That's a tough question. I mean, I think trans is
beautiful because it's kind of magic. Like these things that
we think are set in stone, like facial structures, yeah, things, sex, gender, whatever,
are very kind of like fluid in a way and
like changeable and like being able to change that and

(56:28):
kind of form your own image of yourself. That's like
magic and that is beauty.

Speaker 3 (56:37):
That was better than my answer.

Speaker 1 (56:38):
Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (56:40):
Well I love talking about this. Thank you for being
our first guest to dive deep into the world of Neopussy.
Thank you past the Last stot.

Speaker 3 (56:51):
Yea past the last stot. Thanks for keeping me from
just going on like inane riffs like.

Speaker 2 (56:58):
I had a lot of riffs too, and out that
I was I was going to be really crude, like
I was gonna be like, all right, well we're here,
like I was gonna do like remember, like there's so
many there's so many great jokes, Like I was in
like the music studio with our producer where my band
is working on an album.

Speaker 3 (57:16):
You want to plug your band?

Speaker 1 (57:17):
Oh yeah, you should plug your band. So our band,
Robin Shakedown. We have some spring days in Atlanta, and
then we're planning a summer tour going up through Nashville, Cincinnati, Chicago,
and then coming back down. Wow.

Speaker 2 (57:34):
So starting in the land of her homeland of her vagina.

Speaker 3 (57:37):
Yes, yeah, I think we mentioned this earlier, but yeah,
hopefully we can hopefully we can do something together.

Speaker 1 (57:42):
Yes, yeah, that would be amazing. Yeah, you should tour. Yeah,
Jane trying.

Speaker 3 (57:47):
To tour next year, Yeah, a whole other. Yeah, I
have an album coming out next year, so I'm hoping
to be able to go on tour for that.

Speaker 1 (57:56):
Yeah. Yeah, we have our EP. We're going to be
releasing single throughout the winter and spring for the Robin
Shakedown Baron, so look out for that.

Speaker 3 (58:05):
Our listeners will have already heard of listening a good playlist.

Speaker 1 (58:09):
We should do that.

Speaker 2 (58:10):
Actually, we should have a Beauty translated with all the
people that have been on the show.

Speaker 3 (58:14):
Yeah, thank y'all for listening, Thank you, thank you. All right,
that was a dope interview. I do we want to
take some calls?

Speaker 2 (58:28):
Yes, Jane, I would love to take some calls. So
they're standing by. Cool, let's roll it.

Speaker 5 (58:34):
What we got Hi, Beauty Translated. I'm dying to know
what you think is the trends are going to be
for twenty twenty four and also how much you think
we should follow them. Should we stick to our own
style or is it good to know what's in the
zeitgeist to feel stylish in the world. Can't wait to

(58:56):
see what you have to say. Thanks so much for
your show.

Speaker 3 (58:59):
Okay, thank you.

Speaker 1 (59:02):
That's a great question.

Speaker 3 (59:04):
Yeah, that's a good question because we have talked about
doing an in and out list, but it's a little
too the years kind of already underway.

Speaker 1 (59:12):
Yeah, I don't know, but this.

Speaker 3 (59:13):
Gives us, This gives us a little excuse. Carmen, do
you have any did you write down any ends for
twenty twenty four?

Speaker 2 (59:20):
Fine, I just want to say, like I think, for
me and is going to be like masculinity and femininity
in whatever form more shape that takes for each person.
But like I just think gender gender is back, baby
gender is and troe androgyny is out. Androgyny is out,
and you owe it to us, Okay, but yeah, no,

(59:43):
I just think I just think I want to see
more like fabulous like super gendered people.

Speaker 3 (59:50):
I sort of agree with that. I think the age
of the non binary barista is coming to a close.

Speaker 2 (59:55):
We're closing the door on the spiritual realm.

Speaker 3 (59:58):
Yeah, you're you're You're not get much a lot of today.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
Because it is because now it's something that's like a
noticeable physiogoy physiognomy or like I think that usually like
once things become like that, like they usually start dying
out like a like a noticeable style, like it's honestly yeah,
right right right, like all those AI pictures of like
Beyonce like with the shape and.

Speaker 3 (01:00:26):
Like Taylor, but yeah, like working as a Barissa like
on like it seems like something that's like reaching an apex.
And also I'm already seeing a lot of this the whole,
like AmeriCorps like car hearts, like kind of like you
think that that is what's replacing the non binary super androgyny.

Speaker 1 (01:00:50):
Kind of labor chic labor laborer chic.

Speaker 3 (01:00:53):
And just to clarify this is none of that being
non binary is going out. I think that's and that's fine.
I'm just saying more like the uh, theational Yeah, the
aesthetics of it, I think are waning a little bit.
And I think you're right. I think that you'll see
more people lean into like hyperfelm or hyper masque kind

(01:01:16):
of things and kind of like gender bending those in
their own way. And I think that's pretty nice too.
I think that's cool, And.

Speaker 2 (01:01:23):
I say, do it. Look up Joey Aria, I'm gonna
can we talk about some of my favorite gender benders
for a moment?

Speaker 3 (01:01:29):
Can we answer her question.

Speaker 2 (01:01:30):
Oh my god, you're so right.

Speaker 3 (01:01:31):
I think you should also do what you want. I
don't think you should pay attention to anything.

Speaker 2 (01:01:36):
I think fast fashion is out, and that means that
trends are out.

Speaker 3 (01:01:41):
I'll say this. I'll say this, and this is kind
of like my mo for fashion. My whole life is
like I think that if I don't think it's bad
to be aware of like trends and stuff, or it's
bad to be aware of like seasonal fashion and stuff
like that. But if you have a sense of that's

(01:02:01):
unique to yourself, that is something that like I it's
it's if you have like Janey core, like if you
have your name core, like that is a that is
something that will never go out of style because it
will always fit you. So I would I would highly
advise everyone to find, you know, try in as many

(01:02:23):
hats as possible and find your own core so then
it doesn't really matter what's in and what's out because
you're in.

Speaker 2 (01:02:31):
And just to like wrap all that up, I say
that for me, healthy hair, skin, nails, and teeth are
always in. So yeah, take good care of yourself in
the year twenty twenty four, and I think you'll be sparkling.

Speaker 1 (01:02:46):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:02:46):
I'm being gay now, Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:02:48):
Yeah, I think I think. I think reading is in
reading people sessions over, we're not watching TV. I think
reading's in. I think uh, I think downers are in.
Last year. Last year was a big year. Well it's
been it's been uppers for a while. I think we
should bring the downers backe please. I think fentanyl is out.

Speaker 2 (01:03:14):
Self diagnosing yourself off of TikTok's out?

Speaker 3 (01:03:17):
Okay, yeah, self diagnosis should be out. Let's know. How
about this? How about this? Self diagnosis is out? Peer
diagnosis is innosing. We're letting our homies tell us what's
wrong with.

Speaker 2 (01:03:31):
Which personality disorder do I have?

Speaker 3 (01:03:33):
Janie?

Speaker 2 (01:03:33):
Have you figured it out yet?

Speaker 3 (01:03:35):
We're doing like BuzzFeed quizes to figure out what medications
we should be on.

Speaker 2 (01:03:42):
Yeah, I think we. I think we thoroughly answered.

Speaker 3 (01:03:44):
Yeah, I think we. I think we freaked it.

Speaker 1 (01:03:47):
We freaked baby.

Speaker 3 (01:03:48):
Do we got any other calls? Maybe one or two more?

Speaker 4 (01:03:51):
Hey, guys, I would like to be anonymous and in
thirty year.

Speaker 3 (01:03:57):
Old Atlanta familiar.

Speaker 4 (01:04:03):
Well, not so recently, but my boyfriend, my ex boyfriend,
recently broke up with me back step from there. We
broke up mostly because he is gay.

Speaker 6 (01:04:15):
First of all, I I was wondering, I recently started
dating somebody just a few months after our breakup.

Speaker 4 (01:04:32):
I recently started dating a trance man and are dating
My has been very successful. Everything's going well, beautifully, seemingly,
so nice. He's been so validating and so accepting in
me to see exact opposite of the relationship I was

(01:04:56):
in before.

Speaker 5 (01:04:58):
But my question is.

Speaker 4 (01:04:59):
I about a year almost two years, honestly, and my
question is that early to jump into a different relationship?

Speaker 3 (01:05:14):
My god, all right, we get it. I heard the question.
I heard the question. That's a.

Speaker 1 (01:05:25):
Cut.

Speaker 3 (01:05:25):
The camera's dead ass, Yeah, okay, that you took way
fucking too long to get to that question. Keep it
under a minute. I think I know who your voice is.
I'm gonna start guessing names. Oh no, I'm just kidding.
That voice said sound pretty familiar, though, Uh I didn't.

(01:05:46):
Did you catch how long it's been since the breakup?
I didn't quite touch that part.

Speaker 2 (01:05:52):
I thought she said like a year? What did she
say a year? No?

Speaker 1 (01:05:56):
A month?

Speaker 2 (01:05:57):
That they were together for a year and they broke
up a month ago. I mean, I should be writing
down the book. I will say from experience, I've been
in a lot of long term relationships, and usually they've
been like chained after another, Like I've my adult life,
I will not spend more than like two or three

(01:06:18):
months like single. Like honestly, like since I've been like twenty,
I like twenty two. It's a survival mechanism out here.

Speaker 1 (01:06:27):
I got.

Speaker 3 (01:06:27):
I don't know. I mean, I told myself after my
last relationship that I was going to like be single
for a while, and then a lot of I don't
really want to talk about my personal life, but yeah,
I mean it depends, like I would say, like it
sounds like you're hurt. It sounds like you're hurt from
this relationship. And I think that like having another partner

(01:06:51):
and just doing your best to move on is fine.
But I do think it's also not a bad idea
to play it safe, you know, play it like slow,
you know, hold up on the I love yous, like
hold up on moving in together, just go slow, close

(01:07:11):
slow yet because or maybe for a while. Yeah, I
don't necessarily think that's bad at all. I'm happy for you.
I think that that's a that's totally cool. I just
I would advise I would not advise you to like
just jump in this is the love of my fucking
life a lot, because it is very tempting to go

(01:07:32):
on a very BPD kind of like journey with your
new partner, So I would advise against that. But otherwise, journey,
it's story of my life. Story, It's like the story
of Slaughterhouse Live.

Speaker 2 (01:07:44):
It's probably the story of my life. I need a diagnosis.
I'm gonna I'm gonna ask for a pure diagnosis. Well,
my feelings on this are, first of all, congrats, you know,
on getting out of a relationship with somebody who probably
won't be attracted to you like long term as you
go through your transition. I think being in a relationship

(01:08:04):
with another trans person, as we've talked about on the
show many times, is like very affirming and of course
you're going to find a lot of comfort in each
other and just knowing that you each have a very
similar kind of shared experience navigating the world. And I've
never experienced that. I have only ever dated, I've only

(01:08:26):
ever dated sis men my entire life. In my opinion,
you know, there's pros and there's cons to everything. Okay,
my favorite thing about being in a relationship with a
straight CIS man is that he is so oblivious to

(01:08:46):
everything that just like everything, he has no idea just
about all the stupid gay and like LGBT shit out there,
Like he just doesn't know how dumb it is. So
he's just completely separated from that world. Is kind of
a little bit freeing, you know. But on on the
other hand, he can't relate, you know, So there are

(01:09:08):
times when I'm like, wow, I wish he could maybe
relate a little bit more. Now that being said, when
you're both in the community, it raises a little bit
of a of an issue, an issue if things, you know,
start going south right like, because then it's just becomes like,

(01:09:28):
I don't know, there's like many many memes have been
made about, like the the epic meltdown of like a
tea for tea relationship ending. And I'm not saying that
it's not worth pursuing, but sometimes two trans people in
a relationship with all the shit that we've got going on,
just you know, emotionally and everything, it's a lot I

(01:09:52):
would think, you know, I mean, sometimes it's hard because
sometimes I you know, want to be a little less
in that kind of world, you know.

Speaker 3 (01:10:02):
Yeah, I M I would also say that, like from
my experience, I've I've only been in relationship with SIS people,
sis women and SIS men. I've had like sexual experiences
with trans people, but nothing like long term. It's not

(01:10:24):
for me personally. It's not that I'm not like open
to it or anything. It's just it's just honestly hasn't happened.
And that's that's just kind of is what it is.
But I would just say from like because I've talked
to a lot of people that like are like strictly
tea for tea and they always talk about the like yeah,
like what you said, like the affirmation aspect, and I

(01:10:46):
gotta say, just speaking for me personally, that's not something
that's not important to me, Yeah, I like you said, Carmen,
like I would rather someone just like not really care
forget about it, like not really like like me and
my partner we like just kind of joke about it
and stuff, and like it's nice like for me, like

(01:11:06):
it's nice like knowing that like he is like like
trans like amorists, and like he thinks I'm hot and
I like that. Like it doesn't really it doesn't matter
to me that he's not trans, Like, that's not something
that like matters to me that much. So this is
all to say that, like, I don't like, I think

(01:11:30):
you should weigh how much that like validation aspect really
means to you, because I feel like that's something that
one you can kind of get from a lot of people,
a lot of like platonic relationships, and two like, I mean,
I just don't really know like how rewarding that will be,

(01:11:54):
like if that's something that like, like I feel like
that's just something you would get really really used to. Yeah,
you know, after you've been been with your trans partner
for like fil years, are you still going to be thinking, like, god,
I feel so validated, Like I don't know, like, and
to be fair, and I will just say this one
more time, this is not something I personally have experience with.

(01:12:16):
So if I'm talking out of my ass and this
is not something that applies to you, that's fair enough.
And that's fine. If this is like something that like you,
if you're like hearing what I'm saying and you're like,
oh no, like twenty thirty years down the line, I
would still love the validation. I don't know I'm not
making fun of that. I don't genue, I don't think, don't.
I'm just telling you from my perspective, that's not something

(01:12:39):
that particularly I need in a relationship for me that much.
I need a small like if we're like like putting
our stats into like a Skyrim build, like I just
I don't, I don't my validation stat would be low,
like like I'm I'm spect all the way into like

(01:13:00):
umer sex and access service, access service.

Speaker 1 (01:13:06):
I love that.

Speaker 3 (01:13:06):
Yeah, I think. I think if you're if you're worried
about this being like a quick thing, like moving into
it fast, you know, just take a step back coat
it takes things a little slower and just just evaluate
things and evaluate like what you actually want out of
a relationship and uh yeah, and see if this is
a viable means for you to get it.

Speaker 2 (01:13:28):
Yeah, agreed, But yeah, thank you all so much for
listening to this week's episode of Beauty Translated. We hope
you loved it, And if you want to hear your
voicemail and have us answer it on next week's episode,
please give us a call over on the Beauty Translated Loveline, which.

Speaker 3 (01:13:46):
Is six seven eight five six one two seven eight five.
For all your problems, we will make them worse. Wink think,
think and we can I Oh, I'm sorry. Can I
plug something super quick? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, I have two
shows coming up. If you're in the Atlanta area, you

(01:14:07):
can catch me at Factors in a Little five Points
on January twenty seventh and South Bend Commons on February first.
And is there going to be some fun ones, So
come on out if you're in the.

Speaker 1 (01:14:19):
Area, show out. Jane Heads.

Speaker 3 (01:14:22):
Thank you for listening. We love you, We love you.

Speaker 2 (01:14:25):
Thank you so much. Have about great week. We'll see
you next week. Bye, bab, Thank you for listening to
Beauty Translated. Beauty Translated is hosted by me Carmen Laurent
and Janie Danger.

Speaker 3 (01:14:39):
Produced by Kurt Garan and Jess Krinchitch so special thanks
to Ali Perry and Ali Cantor. Our theme music is
done by Aaron Kaufman and Beauty Translated is proud to
be a part of the Outspoken Network from iHeart Podcasts.

Speaker 2 (01:14:54):
For more iHeart podcast visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcast.

Speaker 6 (01:15:01):
Oh