May 29, 2025 • 45 mins
The Kern family discovers what Joel was really doing on the clock. The investigation into his misconduct only scratches the surface.
If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team, email us at betrayalpod@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram at @betrayalpod.
To access our newsletter and additional content and to connect with the Betrayal community, join our Substack at betrayal.substack.com.
You can listen new episodes of Betrayal Season 4 completely ad-free and 1 week early with an iHeart True Crime+ subscription, available exclusively on Apple Podcasts.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey guys. Before we dive into the episode, we have
exciting news. Betrayal is coming to substack, which is an
online community. We're calling our substack Beyond Betrayal, a place
where we dive deeper into the stories you hear on
this show. Please consider joining our community to gain access
to exclusive content, engage with me and subjects, as well
(00:23):
as connect with others who have experienced betrayal. Just head
to Betrayal dot substack that's sub s T A c K.
Or just go to substack dot com, search beyond Betrayal
and hit subscribe.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
I'm embarrassed, I'm familiar, I'm ashamed. I know what I did.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
I's wrong.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I'm very sorry for it.
Speaker 4 (00:50):
Again, I take Floy's possibility from all my actions and
oh yes for mercy.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal, Season four, Episode two,
Cat and Mouse. In the last episode, we met Caroline
Brega and learned about her husband, former Colorado Springs Police
Lieutenant Joel Kern. On the outside, they were the perfect
American family. Then, on April eleventh, twenty twenty two, Joel
(01:31):
detonated a bomb on his life, a bomb that would
destroy his family. It started with the text he sent
to his wife that read.
Speaker 5 (01:41):
I was caught receiving oral sex from two women in
my cop car I lied about it during an internal
affairs investigation. I am now penning termination.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
April eleventh is now called D Day by Caroline and
her kids. Here's Caroline and Joel's daughter Nicole.
Speaker 6 (02:02):
That evening, I had a lacrosse game, and so I
started kind of getting ready for my lacrosse game.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
It started as a normal day, but it soon would
become an inflection point.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
My mom called me to follow her into the bathroom,
and I don't even remember what she was doing, maybe
taking down her hair from her updeal. She just was
acting off, and so I said what's wrong? And she
didn't respond.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
She was scared something was wrong. Did something happen?
Speaker 6 (02:43):
And then I said, is daddy okay?
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Caroline was at a loss for words. They all lived
with the fear that one day Joel wouldn't come home
from work. But Joel wasn't injured or killed in the
line of duty. Still nothing was okay. Caroline and Joel's
son was a freshman in college far from home.
Speaker 7 (03:08):
I get a call from my sister and so I
send it to voicemail. I get another call, and then
I had the text to reply, and I say, I'm
about to walk into a chemistry medterm. Can I call
you after? And she texted back no, it's an emergency.
So I pick up the phone and I call her,
and I remember my mom and my sister shaken up
(03:34):
in tears.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
The family met in the living room. Nicole and Caroline
sat on the couch. Caroline and Joel's son was on
speaker phone, and Joel stood in front of the fireplace.
It was the most bizarre family meeting you could imagine.
It felt like someone else's life, but no, it was
happening in their home.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
Our daughter's sitting right next to me, our son's on
the phone, and the three of us are just in hysterics.
You can hear our son hysterically crying, our daughter's hysterically crying.
And I said, you need to tell the kids what's
going on.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
What was going on? Well, to understand the events of
April eleven, twenty twenty two, we need to go back
a few months prior to February fifth. That day, a
stranger showed up on Caroline and Joel's doorstep. Joel was
(04:33):
home and answered the door. The whole interaction happened to
be recorded. The sound isn't great, but you'll get the
gist of it. And we've distorted the stranger's voice to
protect his privacy.
Speaker 8 (04:46):
A nine dogs man, Oh chance?
Speaker 9 (04:51):
Was it here?
Speaker 10 (04:52):
Who I am?
Speaker 9 (04:53):
Here's my wife out here? The one that you're talking
your priiser? What are you talking about?
Speaker 2 (04:59):
I'm not here to arrest, but I'm saying, Joel, Yeah,
I'm talking about you.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Okay, my wife. Okay, my wife is there, Dave. I
wouldn't want to know if you know her. I have
no idea you're talking about.
Speaker 9 (05:12):
And if that's the case, then I owe you an apology.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
I'm not, like I said, I'm.
Speaker 11 (05:15):
Not here if I was wrong to leave, why are
you here?
Speaker 9 (05:18):
So if you don't know my property, my property.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
Like I said, I'm not hearing her, ask you, I will.
Speaker 9 (05:23):
That's not what I'm trying to do.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
I just wanted to know you know my wife.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
No, I don't.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
I know you're a pop and all that stuff.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
Man, I know that, but that's not cool.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
That that's not cool.
Speaker 12 (05:33):
I just want you to stay away from my wife.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
You can't even look me in the face and tell
me you made a mistake.
Speaker 12 (05:39):
I know, I don't even know who she is, so leave.
Speaker 13 (05:43):
I thought you didn't be able to look at me,
man de mand.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
And say, yeah, I did fuck your wife. I'm sorry for.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Ruining your marriage.
Speaker 8 (05:47):
No, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
You need to check your wife out because I'm not
doing anything.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
And with that, the couple took off and Joel was
left alone to contemplate what just happened. This man managed
to find his house and came right to his front door.
Caroline had been out on a run and missed the
whole confrontation by minutes, but Joel wasn't home alone. Nicole
was in the basement just doing her homework.
Speaker 6 (06:14):
Usually I would have went up and just saw who
was at the door with him, but for whatever reason,
I just continued to do my homework, and so later
on I asked him, you know who was at the door,
and then he just said like some solicitor.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Joel carried on as if nothing happened. In fact, later
that night, Joel and Caroline went to a party. He
also never mentioned the confrontation to his family.
Speaker 14 (06:51):
It was a.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
Yellowstone theme party and I'm throwing on a blond wig
pretending to be Beth and got him a beard to
be ripped. We left and we were going to a
friend's house who we had been to their home hundreds
of times. And he pulled up to the wrong house
and I said, what are you doing? And so he
was like, what do you mean? And I said, you
(07:13):
pulled up to the wrong house. He said, oh, I
didn't know that, And so, you know, we back out,
go to the right house. Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Caroline laughed it off in the moment. Looking back now,
she sees that Joel's mind was somewhere else that night.
But there was bad news for Joel. The stranger who
came to his door made another stop that day. After
he pulled out of Joel's driveway, he and his wife
drove straight to the Colorado Springs Police Department or CSPD,
(07:47):
and filed an official complaint against Joel. After all, an
officer having sex in his police car while on duty
would be a major professional violation. We filed an records
request so we could get those investigation records. Over the
past year, we received hundreds of pages from CSPD, all
(08:08):
relating to Joel Kern. We were also given actual audio
recordings from the investigation. What you're about to hear is
from one of those recordings. It's Joel's boss, Commander Strassner,
being interviewed by Internal Affairs about Joel's alleged misconduct.
Speaker 9 (08:28):
How did you become aware of this investigation? Can you
kind of walk me through?
Speaker 15 (08:31):
That's about February seventh. I got a call just advising
me that there was internal a complete that was filed
over the weekend regarding the tenant Kern possibly having sex
in the back of his vehicle.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Strawsner was one of the first people Joel went to.
When you heard about the complaint, He.
Speaker 15 (08:52):
Adamantly denies anything happened because I don't even know these people.
I don't know what they're talking about. I haven't seen
him before. There's no way I would do that in
a police car. He goes, made the statement of I
didn't have sex in the back of my car when
I was in high school or college. I'm sure's the
heck not going to do that now kind of thing.
(09:13):
Very visibly upset, almost in tears, and just really angry
about how somebody could file a false complaint and turn
his entire world upside down, in his family upside down.
So he was really upset and really pissed off.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
But was his rage really directed at the couple from
making the complaint or was it directed at the Internal
Affairs department for taking the complaint? Seriously? Joel was an experienced,
respected police lieutenant. This investigation threatened to take all that away.
Speaker 15 (09:46):
He goes, I just don't understand why this couldn't have
been a preliminary inquiry.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
I tell you no, and this thing be closed.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
A preliminary inquiry is like an initial check to see
if there's any valid reason to suspect that the officer
has done something wrong. Internal affairs can then decide to
move forward with the investigation or close the matter.
Speaker 15 (10:06):
I said, look, Joel, do you know why it couldn't
have been a preliminary inquiry? They got to go through
the process.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Let's be clear. What the complaint was alleging was no
ordinary affair. They were claiming police misconduct, an officer abusing
his badge, having sex in a taxpayer funded vehicle on
the public's time and in public. Remember, Joel had worked
in internal affairs years earlier. He understood how it operated. Ironically,
(10:38):
he had worked in the department with Commander Strassner sudden,
they have to.
Speaker 15 (10:43):
Do a thorough job, and he's like, yeah, I get it,
but he was very angry.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
But Strawsner also gave Joel some reassurance.
Speaker 15 (10:53):
I said, look, I have no reason not to believe
anything that you're telling because if you didn't do this,
as you're saying, either one or two things, they're completely
lining and they need to be charged with false reporting
or somebody's impersonating you. We need to get to the
end of that. And so we got to do this thoroughly,
and I'm going to make sure I stay in contact
(11:13):
with internal affairs to make sure it's a complete and
thorough investigation.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Strassner could tell that Joel was distraught. This was a
serious matter. Someone could be filing a false report or
impersonating him. Strawsner assured Joel that if someone was victimizing him,
they would be held accountable. To complete the investigation, the
CSPD took Joel's police vehicle and his department issued phone.
Speaker 15 (11:42):
If it was me and his shoes and as he's saying,
all of it is fabricated, I would be incredibly upset
and angry. And to me it seemed very genuine and authentic.
I maan, I got no reason to doubt.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
What he see.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
This was recorded in February twenty twenty two. The investigation
into Joel had been going on for two months, two
months where he knew his life was on the brink
of collapse. Meanwhile, Caroline was completely in the dark. Joel
didn't tell her about the man on their doorstep or
the misconduct investigation. It seemed like Joel thought that with
(12:25):
his rank in years of service, he would be able
to talk his way out of this, but the CESPD
was taking it seriously. They went ahead and looked for
any evidence that would support the couple's claim, and that
included interviewing the man and his wife. Yes, the couple
who showed up at Joel's door agreed to cooperate, so
(12:47):
Internal Affairs sat with the woman Joel adamantly denied ever
seeing before. Here are some of that interview.
Speaker 16 (12:56):
Okay, this is a center on Field Chance I with
the Colorado Springs Police Department Internal Affairs Section Today's February seventeenth,
twenty twenty two. Also president is the General Affairs, Sergeant
Drew Jealous.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
Lieutenant Chanza asked the woman about how she met Joel.
She explained it was on a fetish and king social
network called betlife dot com. And as a note, we've
altered the voices of all the civilians interviewed by CSPD
to protect their privacy.
Speaker 16 (13:24):
What was it that initially drew your attention to the
person we're talking about today?
Speaker 17 (13:28):
He contacted me, just like Facebook has messenger, that there's
a messenger within it.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
Joel had suggested that they meet at a public park.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
I drove in my vehicle to go meet him.
Speaker 17 (13:44):
When I got to the location, which was Memorial Park,
he was in what looked like an unmarked police car.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
I imagine the first question would be, how would I
know that. I've got a number.
Speaker 17 (13:58):
Of officers in my family who I've seen their unmarked vehicles.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
I do know what they look like. He could see.
I was nervous.
Speaker 17 (14:09):
I was shaken, and at that point it probably should
have stopped.
Speaker 16 (14:16):
Did the two if you have anything in common, any
fetishes as you describe them, that that kind of made
you kind of continue the conversation.
Speaker 17 (14:26):
Yes, he was into domination and I was into submission.
He told me that he would enjoy spanking me and
fisting me and.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
Choking me and pulling my hair.
Speaker 9 (14:46):
So what leads you to believe that this person was
a police officer?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Stated he was?
Speaker 9 (14:51):
Can you tell us a little more about that.
Speaker 17 (14:53):
He eventually told me his name, and you know, eventually
told me that he was a police officer with Springs
Police told me he did traffic investigations.
Speaker 9 (15:07):
So when he told you his name, what name did
he give you?
Speaker 3 (15:12):
Joel Kerr?
Speaker 16 (15:17):
Were you physically harmed in any way? I know you
said it bruised. Were you harmed in any way during
this encounter?
Speaker 17 (15:25):
I mean I was bruised, and that's about the extent
of it.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
The dammage Jo's suffer is on me.
Speaker 16 (15:32):
Was there any aspect of this meeting that was non consensual?
Speaker 17 (15:37):
From your perspective, this isn't about digging into his life
and trying to harm him. It is simply about as
an officer, he should not be using his vehicle to
(15:57):
have what I imagine this probably not the first rendezvous.
Speaker 9 (16:03):
What makes you say that that that you believe this
wasn't his.
Speaker 17 (16:06):
First because he discussed enjoying having meetups such as this.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
This woman had come to regret her actions and confessed
to her husband. She gave her husband access to her
computer and all her passwords. She was remorseful about the
encounter and took responsibility for her part in it. The
woman fully disclosed her actions to her husband and agreed
to accompany him to Joel's house. However, as you heard,
(16:38):
things didn't.
Speaker 5 (16:39):
Go as planned.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
They of course reported him. The woman's story was credible,
and when police searched Joel's phone and computer, they found
evidence supporting her story. And then they identified another woman
Joel had met up with. He planned this one on
his work phone, but it seemed like he forgot to
delete a few messages from the exchange. This woman had
(17:05):
also met Joel on fet life. Although she was cooperative,
she seemed less eager to discuss the encounter. An internal
affairs sergeant contacted her by phone.
Speaker 12 (17:16):
So you started talking, you think online in August twenty
twenty one. You spoke on the phone, he would call you,
and you spoke through WhatsApp. When's the first time you
said you met. When's the first time you actually met
in person.
Speaker 18 (17:28):
I believe that he was a conference in Denver and
we just met briefly when he was on his way back,
like the last day that he was going back to
the Springs.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
The woman and Joel had talked and texted for several weeks.
He had attended a work conference in Denver. After talking
online and on the phone, there was an opening to
meet up. On the way back from the conference, they
met in the parking lot of a sporting goods store.
But here was the information Internal affairs was really after
(17:58):
had Joel used his police car to have sex with her?
And was it while he was on duty?
Speaker 12 (18:05):
Was there anything in that vehicle that made you think
that it was probably not his personal vehicle radio, the.
Speaker 18 (18:12):
Police radio with Canner or whatever you call him.
Speaker 12 (18:15):
You got into a silver Esub you don't remember the
maker model, but you believe it was a police vehicle
because it has a radio in it. Maybe there for
twenty to thirty minutes and engaged in vaginal sex in
the backseat of that vehicle. Yeah, And other than that,
there was no other meetings. You've still talked as friends,
(18:37):
but no sex. No, no, And let me ask this.
I was reading through some text messages between you and Joel,
and one of them says like something about there's been
some drama and I've deleted everything not to worry about it.
Do you remember that text thread?
Speaker 18 (18:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (18:58):
What was that about?
Speaker 18 (19:00):
I mean, he told me that there was something going on.
I didn't really go into detail, but I guess that
wasn't surprise when I got your message yesterday.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Despite Joel's adamant denials, it appeared he had in fact
had sex in his police vehicle during work hours. CSPD
conducted a full investigation. Internal affairs even ordered a forensic
analysis of the car's interior. They determined that the complaint
was true. Joel had been having sex with women in
(19:58):
his police car in public on company time. On April eleventh,
Joel was summoned to a meeting with his commander, and
you'll hear that meeting in a later episode. And it
was on that day that he could no longer hide
the investigation from Caroline and their kids. In the early
(20:20):
evening on April eleventh, twenty twenty two, Joel was home
with his family. Caroline and Nicole sat huddled together on
the living room sofa. There were tears, accusations, and grief.
Their son was on speakerphone from college, alternating between anguish
and disgust.
Speaker 5 (20:39):
As he sat in our home. He swore up and
down to the kids. It was only two times. It
was only these two people.
Speaker 6 (20:44):
That's it.
Speaker 5 (20:45):
It was only these two people.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
He was only admitting to what the CSPD had already uncovered. Meanwhile,
he told his family a tearful story about what happened.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
He said, I started going down a rabbit hole online
when I worked at night, and I would see these
different websites, and out of curiosity, I started corresponding with
different people on different websites, and that's how I met
these two people. It was only these two times. It
was only these two times.
Speaker 6 (21:14):
I was just astonished that he could do this to
our family.
Speaker 7 (21:20):
Well I could keep saying, was how could you do
this to my mom and my sister?
Speaker 15 (21:25):
How could you do this?
Speaker 5 (21:28):
You know, it's one thing to try to digest that
when you have just been betrayed by your spouse, but
see here and watch your kids. It's just a completely
different level.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
Joel insisted that he only had been unfaithful with two people,
but Caroline wasn't naive. She knew there had to be more.
Speaker 14 (21:53):
You know, I had enough sense to say, if I
secure a divorce attorney and they were to do an
open records Request act, what else would they find in
your file and he looked terrified.
Speaker 1 (22:08):
With Caroline's words still hanging in the air, Joel dropped
another bombshell. Back in episode one. We learned he'd been
tapped form one of the departments and most sought after roles,
the public information officer. He'd be the face of the department,
the media liaison, the voice. He'd already done the job temporarily,
(22:30):
then out of nowhere, the offer vanished.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
He said, I had a falling out with the chief.
And I said, you had a falling out with the
chief of police, and he said, I had a falling
out with him, and he's taken away my opportunity to
be the public information officer.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
But that had been a lie. There hadn't been an
issue with the chief. The issue had been with Joel.
Speaker 5 (22:56):
He did not get the public information officer position because
of sexual harassment.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
While Joel served as temporary public Information officer in twenty sixteen,
he asked female reporters to use an encrypted app to
communicate with him, and what he said there unnerved the reporters.
When one reporter heard Joel Kern was going to be
appointed the permanent Public Information officer in twenty nineteen, she
was alarmed and wrote a letter here's how it began
(23:28):
to the Colorado Springs Police Department. I'm writing to voice
my concerns about naming Lieutenant Jul Kern the next PIO.
To accuse anyone of inappropriate behavior is a risk, But
to accuse an officer, especially one that controls which media
members get information and how fast, could be career suicide.
(23:49):
But that is what most emboldened me to voice my concerns. Now,
this letter led to Joel Kern's first internal affairs investigation
for sexually harassing female news reporters. The CSPB started by
interviewing the reporter that wrote the letter.
Speaker 11 (24:08):
This is Commander Tishossky with Carrs Friends Police Department Internal
Affairs Section. Today's February seventh, twenty nineteen.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
Internal Affairs asked the reporter about the app J'll ask
her to download.
Speaker 8 (24:21):
He encouraged me to get the WhatsApp so that we
could communicate in a way that his phone would be
more secure from the police department, as in, if he
was giving me tips of some sort, so that it
would be encrypted and it would be on his personal
phone and it could be taken That kind of stuff.
(24:42):
He never explicitly said, do you want to do anything
with me? Or like he never explicitly asked me out,
or you know, things like that. Nature it is all
very sneaky, and about interpretation, you mean sneaky sneakyism. He
(25:03):
would use words that would be suggestive or language that
would be suggestive, and it felt to me like a
test to see how I took it. He brought up
sexual relations with his wife, and again I don't remember
exactly what was said, but I remember that he was
on vacation or at his son's base, or not baseball,
(25:27):
but some kind of sporting event away, and he mentioned
like something along the lines of, you know, maybe I'll
get lucky, or when you have kids, the only time
you have sex is when you're away, or something like that.
That obviously was inappropriate and kind of opened the door
(25:48):
if I wanted to talk about sexual relations.
Speaker 11 (25:51):
You had wrote that this became obvious that the friendlier
I was.
Speaker 5 (25:56):
The more beneficial it could be.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
So tell me about this.
Speaker 11 (26:00):
What do you mean by friendlier?
Speaker 8 (26:02):
If I would have accepted his advances or been sexual
in return, or you know, when I explained, I felt
like he was opened the door to talk about my
sexual life. If I would have done that kind of stuff,
like just given that green light that I'm okay with
this behavior.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Okay, So what was the benefit?
Speaker 8 (26:23):
The benefit was the whole point in telling us, telling
me to get what zapp was. You know, this was
a way for him to give us tips. So the
benefit was if we're friendly, if we had this good relationship,
then he would give us good scoops and tips about
things going on in the police department.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
The reporter knew of other women who felt the same way,
but they either decided it was too risky to complain
or felt it didn't rise to the level of needing
to report. So without any other complaints, the investigation was
relatively thin and it looked like Joel was going to
talk his way out of this one. We actually received
(27:03):
the recording of Joel doing exactly that.
Speaker 11 (27:09):
This is Commander of Ty Sholshski with Colshman's Police Department
Professional Standards Division. Today is February eleventh, twenty nineteen. I
am interviewing Lieutenant Joel Kern in regards to internal Affairs
case nineteen zero three zero.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Oshevski asked Joel to explain why he had urged reporters
to download WhatsApp, an encrypted app that his supervisors couldn't monitor.
This was a violation of department rules, and Joel knew it.
Speaker 9 (27:39):
At the time.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
There was like this big thing in the media about
you know, stories being lead and released, and then there's
different apps that people communicate the reporters about to be
like a safe method of communication with the reporters or whatever.
Speaker 3 (27:52):
Safe meaning like secure.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
At first, Joel said it was for security, but the
IA officer wasn't.
Speaker 11 (27:59):
By I'm not, I guess I don't understand if you're
worried about stories leaking, why was it only these two women?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Well, I mean, I see where you're going with that.
And again it's because I was communicating with them the most,
like one.
Speaker 9 (28:18):
That was always asking the questions the most.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
I don't think it was.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Anything that would be like a targeting thing or anything
like that.
Speaker 11 (28:25):
Were you trying to just target? When you say target,
I mean I think get more friendlier with those two,
maybe hoping it might go somewhere.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
I think if I was honest with myself, then I
would say, yeah, that would be an.
Speaker 9 (28:37):
A curious statement.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Are they young? Are they old or middle aged?
Speaker 9 (28:44):
I guess like twenties, arly, thirties.
Speaker 11 (28:47):
Okay, middle aged Joel, it's like fifty okay.
Speaker 18 (28:53):
Are they attractive? Are they not?
Speaker 5 (28:55):
Okay?
Speaker 11 (28:58):
So you were saying that you were singling those two
out for the WhatsApp of it?
Speaker 3 (29:05):
That sounds bad of it.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Yeah, I think that, if I'm honest with myself, that
would be a fair statement. You know, they're very smart
and like I say, witty and there's fun to talk to.
And then so I think then that's where the flirtation
came in, and then the sexual uino It wouldn't be
something that i'd want my wife or kids reading obviously.
Speaker 11 (29:31):
So Joel, when you're talking about the flirtation, was that
on your part?
Speaker 3 (29:36):
Well, whose part was that on?
Speaker 4 (29:38):
I think it was.
Speaker 9 (29:41):
I think it's like mutual flirtation.
Speaker 10 (29:43):
And then.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
Things weren't good at home.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Right as the conversation gets to the heart of the issue,
his abuse of power, Dole pivots. He wells up with
tears and changes the subject too what he's been going
through recently.
Speaker 11 (30:03):
Why did you have these conversations with them, the sexual
innuendo conversation.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
That was in a bad place with my marriage at
the time, and emotionally, and then I think I got
maybe just like sucked into a trap or reading things
into things that were being said that we're not really there.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Caroline had no idea her marriage was in a bad
place in twenty nineteen. If you remember from episode one,
Caroline shared Joel had a few breakdowns and ultimately started therapy.
He had mentioned witnessing the carnage from fatal accident scenes
and his fear about their kids starting to drive, but
she'd been there for him and they worked through it
(30:52):
as a couple. As the interview continued, Joel read the room,
he realized his best strategy would be to fall on
the sword.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
I'm embarrassed, I'm humiliated, I'm ashamed. I know what I
did was wrong. I'm very sorry for it, and I've
taken proactive steps to help myself get better again. I
take four responsibility for my actions, and I asked for mercy.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
Joel had been on the record pleading for mercy three
years before his official suspension, which was on April eleventh,
twenty twenty two, and on April eleventh, the truth was
finally being laid bare. In their living room, Caroline and
their daughter were on the couch and their son was
on speakerphone. They listened to Joel confess that he'd been
(31:48):
lying and covering his tracks for years.
Speaker 5 (31:52):
And then he went on a tirade of continuing to
blame me and said that he didn't think we had
sex enough, and then he started making crass comments about
his sexual needs. Our daughter was just wailing and crying,
and our son hung up. He never removed his wedding ring.
(32:13):
He always kept an one, but then he struggled.
Speaker 6 (32:17):
For a long time.
Speaker 5 (32:19):
It finally gets his ring off inside of it I
had engraved forever and ever, sets it down on the fireplace,
walks over and fills up his yetti cup, and just
walked out the door.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Caroline's entire world had come apart in a single afternoon. Immediately,
she reached out to a close friend who would soon
take on a greater role in her life.
Speaker 19 (33:07):
My name is Don and I'm a family law attorney.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
Don was a good friend to both Caroline and Joel.
Speaker 19 (33:15):
I was shocked, absolutely shocked when I heard the news.
For me to not even have an inkling of his
other side, I guess bothered me because they usually have
a pretty good gut feeling about people.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
Don normally made it policy not to represent her friends
in a divorce, but she made an exception this time,
not so much for Caroline, but for the kids.
Speaker 19 (33:39):
The children are very proud of their parents accomplishments. They
really appreciated and respected what they did. That was part
of their identity is that their parents were so great.
So when this all happened, my inkling for the children
(33:59):
was everything that they know, everything that they thought was
good and pure or whatever real is not.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
The kids had to find a way to keep going.
Their son wanted to come home from college, but Caroline
wouldn't allow it, and their daughter.
Speaker 6 (34:20):
Everything happened on a Monday, and that Wednesday, I took
my SATs. I had a plan, like I still needed
to go to college. So, you know, she kind of ingraining.
I guess, the sort of motivation where you need to
do something, you just get it done.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
As for Caroline, she was on autopilot. Her friends came
to her with some unsettling but important advice.
Speaker 5 (34:47):
You know, they let me know, you really should set
doctor's appointment to make sure that I don't have anything
and have a full STI STD screen and so I
called this facility humili asked if I could schedule an
appointment specifically for this. They said yes, And when I
walked in, I tried to keep myself together. And then
(35:10):
I sat in the exam room and this nurse practitioner
who I had seen dozens of times for my kids'
sports physicals, she walked in the room and I just
immediately lost it. I'm in this exam room, I'm crying.
I'm telling her these very personal details of what's just
(35:33):
been revealed. And so she does a full exam and
she leaves the room, and when she came back in,
she just had this horrible, fearful look on her face.
And I just was sobbing, and I said, you can
tell I have something, can't you. You can already tell I
(35:55):
have something, And she shook her head and she said no.
She was debating on telling me that Joel had essentially
been blacklisted from seeing her because he had come in
four different appointments before and had been and appropriate with
(36:16):
his commentary and very sexualized with his commentary toward her.
And I was mortified. And she said, given what I
was going through, if she was in my shoes, she'd
want to know.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
Caroline had as drol repeatedly, what else, what else have
you done? She didn't want any more surprises. There had
to be more than just two affairs, and this experience
was confirmation that her instincts were dead on.
Speaker 5 (36:47):
I was just humiliated hearing from another female that my
husband had approached them in a manner that made them
feel so uncomfortable that they could not even professionally see.
It was humiliating, absolutely humiliating. I got to the parking
lot and I called him and he answered, and I
(37:10):
said to him, this is what was just told to me.
And he was very calm, and he said, I'm sorry.
And I said, you knew this and he said yes,
they let me know, and I knew how I behaved,
and I'm embarrassed. And he was just so matter of
(37:30):
fact about it. And I was infuriated, absolutely infuriated. And
I saw his location and I drove to the campsite
where he was at at the RV park.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Joel was staying in their family RV at a campground.
Speaker 5 (37:47):
And I just started banging on the door and he
opened the door and I told him, do not lie
to me, do not lie to me. I want to
know what you have done. You are someone who I
don't even know, and I want to know the secret
life that you have lived behind our backs.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Nicole was at school when she noticed Caroline's location on
their Family Life three sixty app.
Speaker 13 (38:17):
I don't really want to have my mom alone with
my dad because I was really scared of my dad
because I thought like he did all this stuff without
us knowing.
Speaker 5 (38:30):
I don't know what he's capable of. Next thing, you know,
there's banging at the door of our RV. She just
got up and left her classroom at the high school
and drove to where we were at, and as we
were sitting there, she walked calmly over to a laptop
(38:50):
he had taken from our home.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
Nicole grabbed Joel's computer and started looking through it, logging
onto various websites and reading his emails and text messages.
They were there for the truth. All those long nights
on duty. What else had Joel been up to? How
far did his misconduct go?
Speaker 5 (39:10):
Suddenly, through our daughter's forensic reveal of his computer, the
number of people he had sex with just started growing dramatically.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
Nicole dialed in her older brother. She wanted him to
hear everything, so it became the next family meeting, and
then Nicole started recording on her phone. She wanted documentation.
She and her mom were running on adrenaline.
Speaker 9 (39:40):
Cat and mouse, Cat and mouse, Cat and mouse.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
You just have to keep being caught.
Speaker 1 (39:44):
Why can't you just spell it all out?
Speaker 9 (39:46):
Because I can't remember everything because you.
Speaker 5 (39:48):
Had so many people.
Speaker 6 (39:51):
How many people didn't talk to?
Speaker 5 (39:54):
Fifteen one hundred? What's the range?
Speaker 10 (39:58):
Fifty sounds good?
Speaker 5 (40:01):
How many times did you actually physically meet someone?
Speaker 2 (40:07):
This is why I'm telling you, like around the seven ten.
Speaker 6 (40:12):
And then another thought I had today, I cannot drive
around the city without questioning. I wonder if my did
received oral sex.
Speaker 3 (40:22):
And this parking lot.
Speaker 13 (40:26):
Remember that day we went.
Speaker 10 (40:27):
To Memorial Park.
Speaker 6 (40:28):
We looked at the police memorial.
Speaker 5 (40:31):
And all that you wanted us to see the police memorial.
Speaker 6 (40:34):
We ran races over by Memorial Park.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
Memorial Park was where Joel met the first woman to
have sex in his cop car. At first he denied
he was working when they met up.
Speaker 6 (40:46):
But then I know.
Speaker 3 (40:48):
Where I told you after work earlier, but.
Speaker 10 (40:55):
I'm pretty sure it was like mid morning or lunchtime
or whatever. And then went back to work and then
worked out and took a shower and all that, so you.
Speaker 5 (41:07):
Left work, went and had sex with someone on the
city's dime.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
Everyone thought Joel was one of the good ones, an
honorable cop. They had sacrificed so much for his career.
She didn't recognize this man. In fact, she didn't recognize
her life at all. Her life was now split into two,
two realities running parallel tracks. There were her memories, and
(41:40):
then there was everything Joel was doing.
Speaker 5 (41:42):
Behind her back.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
All of those late nights, the miss sports games, the holidays.
Where was he? Her brain never went there. She didn't
know what was real anymore. It was a sad and
terrifying feeling.
Speaker 5 (42:00):
The kids and I thought we were living this life
of love and a family. I'm purity more things perfect,
of course not do we argue about taking trash out
and who was going to pick up from dinner yup?
(42:21):
But never did I think that anything like this was
going on behind our backs.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
Ever, So was this finally the full picture? We're all
of Joel's secrets out in the open. No, not even close.
Here's Caroline and Joel's son.
Speaker 7 (42:44):
I'm not naive to the fact that all of us
are human, and everybody makes mistakes, and everybody has their shortcomings,
and everybody has flaws and demons that they with but
to me, there's a clear line here between being a
(43:07):
fallible person and monstrosity.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
On the next episode of Betrayal, Caroline comes to the
realization that Joel has been gaslighting her for years.
Speaker 5 (43:23):
So I'm literally watching the phone where I can see
him speeding to our house. He's not at another accident,
he's not at the hospital. He's coming from somewhere. And
so when he got home, I said, are you lying
to me?
Speaker 1 (43:40):
And more revelations about his double life are exposed. Thank
you for listening to Betrayal season four. If you would
like to reach out to the Betrayal team, email us
at Betrayal Pod at gmail dot com. That's Betrayal Pod
at gmail dot com. Also, please be sure to follow
(44:01):
us on Instagram at Betrayal Pod and me Andrea H.
Gunning for all Betrayal content, news and updates. One way
to support the series is by subscribing to our show
on Apple Podcasts. Please rate and review Betrayal. Five star
reviews help us know you appreciate what we do. Betrayal
is a production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment.
(44:23):
Group in partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive
produced by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Fason. Betrayal is hosted
and produced by me Andrea Gunning, written and produced by
Carrie Hartman, also produced by Ben Fetterman. Our associate producers
are Caitlin Golden and Kristin Melcurie. Our iHeart team is
Ali Perry and Jessica Crincheck. Story editing by Monique Leboard,
(44:48):
audio editing and mixing by Matt Delvecchio, editing by Tanner Robbins,
and special thanks to Caroline and her family. Betrayal's theme
is composed by Oliver Baines. Music library provided by mid
Music and For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts,
Hey guys. Before we dive into the episode, we have
exciting news. Betrayal is coming to substack, which is an
online community. We're calling our substack Beyond Betrayal, a place
where we dive deeper into the stories you hear on
this show. Please consider joining our community to gain access
to exclusive content, engage with me and subjects, as well
(00:23):
as connect with others who have experienced betrayal. Just head
to Betrayal dot substack that's sub s T A c K.
Or just go to substack dot com, search beyond Betrayal
and hit subscribe.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
I'm embarrassed, I'm familiar, I'm ashamed. I know what I did.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
I's wrong.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I'm very sorry for it.
Speaker 4 (00:50):
Again, I take Floy's possibility from all my actions and
oh yes for mercy.
Speaker 1 (01:07):
I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal, Season four, Episode two,
Cat and Mouse. In the last episode, we met Caroline
Brega and learned about her husband, former Colorado Springs Police
Lieutenant Joel Kern. On the outside, they were the perfect
American family. Then, on April eleventh, twenty twenty two, Joel
(01:31):
detonated a bomb on his life, a bomb that would
destroy his family. It started with the text he sent
to his wife that read.
Speaker 5 (01:41):
I was caught receiving oral sex from two women in
my cop car I lied about it during an internal
affairs investigation. I am now penning termination.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
April eleventh is now called D Day by Caroline and
her kids. Here's Caroline and Joel's daughter Nicole.
Speaker 6 (02:02):
That evening, I had a lacrosse game, and so I
started kind of getting ready for my lacrosse game.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
It started as a normal day, but it soon would
become an inflection point.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
My mom called me to follow her into the bathroom,
and I don't even remember what she was doing, maybe
taking down her hair from her updeal. She just was
acting off, and so I said what's wrong? And she
didn't respond.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
She was scared something was wrong. Did something happen?
Speaker 6 (02:43):
And then I said, is daddy okay?
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Caroline was at a loss for words. They all lived
with the fear that one day Joel wouldn't come home
from work. But Joel wasn't injured or killed in the
line of duty. Still nothing was okay. Caroline and Joel's
son was a freshman in college far from home.
Speaker 7 (03:08):
I get a call from my sister and so I
send it to voicemail. I get another call, and then
I had the text to reply, and I say, I'm
about to walk into a chemistry medterm. Can I call
you after? And she texted back no, it's an emergency.
So I pick up the phone and I call her,
and I remember my mom and my sister shaken up
(03:34):
in tears.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
The family met in the living room. Nicole and Caroline
sat on the couch. Caroline and Joel's son was on
speaker phone, and Joel stood in front of the fireplace.
It was the most bizarre family meeting you could imagine.
It felt like someone else's life, but no, it was
happening in their home.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
Our daughter's sitting right next to me, our son's on
the phone, and the three of us are just in hysterics.
You can hear our son hysterically crying, our daughter's hysterically crying.
And I said, you need to tell the kids what's
going on.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
What was going on? Well, to understand the events of
April eleven, twenty twenty two, we need to go back
a few months prior to February fifth. That day, a
stranger showed up on Caroline and Joel's doorstep. Joel was
(04:33):
home and answered the door. The whole interaction happened to
be recorded. The sound isn't great, but you'll get the
gist of it. And we've distorted the stranger's voice to
protect his privacy.
Speaker 8 (04:46):
A nine dogs man, Oh chance?
Speaker 9 (04:51):
Was it here?
Speaker 10 (04:52):
Who I am?
Speaker 9 (04:53):
Here's my wife out here? The one that you're talking
your priiser? What are you talking about?
Speaker 2 (04:59):
I'm not here to arrest, but I'm saying, Joel, Yeah,
I'm talking about you.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Okay, my wife. Okay, my wife is there, Dave. I
wouldn't want to know if you know her. I have
no idea you're talking about.
Speaker 9 (05:12):
And if that's the case, then I owe you an apology.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
I'm not, like I said, I'm.
Speaker 11 (05:15):
Not here if I was wrong to leave, why are
you here?
Speaker 9 (05:18):
So if you don't know my property, my property.
Speaker 3 (05:20):
Like I said, I'm not hearing her, ask you, I will.
Speaker 9 (05:23):
That's not what I'm trying to do.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
I just wanted to know you know my wife.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
No, I don't.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
I know you're a pop and all that stuff.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
Man, I know that, but that's not cool.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
That that's not cool.
Speaker 12 (05:33):
I just want you to stay away from my wife.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
You can't even look me in the face and tell
me you made a mistake.
Speaker 12 (05:39):
I know, I don't even know who she is, so leave.
Speaker 13 (05:43):
I thought you didn't be able to look at me,
man de mand.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
And say, yeah, I did fuck your wife. I'm sorry for.
Speaker 2 (05:46):
Ruining your marriage.
Speaker 8 (05:47):
No, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
You need to check your wife out because I'm not
doing anything.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
And with that, the couple took off and Joel was
left alone to contemplate what just happened. This man managed
to find his house and came right to his front door.
Caroline had been out on a run and missed the
whole confrontation by minutes, but Joel wasn't home alone. Nicole
was in the basement just doing her homework.
Speaker 6 (06:14):
Usually I would have went up and just saw who
was at the door with him, but for whatever reason,
I just continued to do my homework, and so later
on I asked him, you know who was at the door,
and then he just said like some solicitor.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Joel carried on as if nothing happened. In fact, later
that night, Joel and Caroline went to a party. He
also never mentioned the confrontation to his family.
Speaker 14 (06:51):
It was a.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
Yellowstone theme party and I'm throwing on a blond wig
pretending to be Beth and got him a beard to
be ripped. We left and we were going to a
friend's house who we had been to their home hundreds
of times. And he pulled up to the wrong house
and I said, what are you doing? And so he
was like, what do you mean? And I said, you
(07:13):
pulled up to the wrong house. He said, oh, I
didn't know that, And so, you know, we back out,
go to the right house. Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Caroline laughed it off in the moment. Looking back now,
she sees that Joel's mind was somewhere else that night.
But there was bad news for Joel. The stranger who
came to his door made another stop that day. After
he pulled out of Joel's driveway, he and his wife
drove straight to the Colorado Springs Police Department or CSPD,
(07:47):
and filed an official complaint against Joel. After all, an
officer having sex in his police car while on duty
would be a major professional violation. We filed an records
request so we could get those investigation records. Over the
past year, we received hundreds of pages from CSPD, all
(08:08):
relating to Joel Kern. We were also given actual audio
recordings from the investigation. What you're about to hear is
from one of those recordings. It's Joel's boss, Commander Strassner,
being interviewed by Internal Affairs about Joel's alleged misconduct.
Speaker 9 (08:28):
How did you become aware of this investigation? Can you
kind of walk me through?
Speaker 15 (08:31):
That's about February seventh. I got a call just advising
me that there was internal a complete that was filed
over the weekend regarding the tenant Kern possibly having sex
in the back of his vehicle.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Strawsner was one of the first people Joel went to.
When you heard about the complaint, He.
Speaker 15 (08:52):
Adamantly denies anything happened because I don't even know these people.
I don't know what they're talking about. I haven't seen
him before. There's no way I would do that in
a police car. He goes, made the statement of I
didn't have sex in the back of my car when
I was in high school or college. I'm sure's the
heck not going to do that now kind of thing.
(09:13):
Very visibly upset, almost in tears, and just really angry
about how somebody could file a false complaint and turn
his entire world upside down, in his family upside down.
So he was really upset and really pissed off.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
But was his rage really directed at the couple from
making the complaint or was it directed at the Internal
Affairs department for taking the complaint? Seriously? Joel was an experienced,
respected police lieutenant. This investigation threatened to take all that away.
Speaker 15 (09:46):
He goes, I just don't understand why this couldn't have
been a preliminary inquiry.
Speaker 3 (09:51):
I tell you no, and this thing be closed.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
A preliminary inquiry is like an initial check to see
if there's any valid reason to suspect that the officer
has done something wrong. Internal affairs can then decide to
move forward with the investigation or close the matter.
Speaker 15 (10:06):
I said, look, Joel, do you know why it couldn't
have been a preliminary inquiry? They got to go through
the process.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Let's be clear. What the complaint was alleging was no
ordinary affair. They were claiming police misconduct, an officer abusing
his badge, having sex in a taxpayer funded vehicle on
the public's time and in public. Remember, Joel had worked
in internal affairs years earlier. He understood how it operated. Ironically,
(10:38):
he had worked in the department with Commander Strassner sudden,
they have to.
Speaker 15 (10:43):
Do a thorough job, and he's like, yeah, I get it,
but he was very angry.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
But Strawsner also gave Joel some reassurance.
Speaker 15 (10:53):
I said, look, I have no reason not to believe
anything that you're telling because if you didn't do this,
as you're saying, either one or two things, they're completely
lining and they need to be charged with false reporting
or somebody's impersonating you. We need to get to the
end of that. And so we got to do this thoroughly,
and I'm going to make sure I stay in contact
(11:13):
with internal affairs to make sure it's a complete and
thorough investigation.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
Strassner could tell that Joel was distraught. This was a
serious matter. Someone could be filing a false report or
impersonating him. Strawsner assured Joel that if someone was victimizing him,
they would be held accountable. To complete the investigation, the
CSPD took Joel's police vehicle and his department issued phone.
Speaker 15 (11:42):
If it was me and his shoes and as he's saying,
all of it is fabricated, I would be incredibly upset
and angry. And to me it seemed very genuine and authentic.
I maan, I got no reason to doubt.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
What he see.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
This was recorded in February twenty twenty two. The investigation
into Joel had been going on for two months, two
months where he knew his life was on the brink
of collapse. Meanwhile, Caroline was completely in the dark. Joel
didn't tell her about the man on their doorstep or
the misconduct investigation. It seemed like Joel thought that with
(12:25):
his rank in years of service, he would be able
to talk his way out of this, but the CESPD
was taking it seriously. They went ahead and looked for
any evidence that would support the couple's claim, and that
included interviewing the man and his wife. Yes, the couple
who showed up at Joel's door agreed to cooperate, so
(12:47):
Internal Affairs sat with the woman Joel adamantly denied ever
seeing before. Here are some of that interview.
Speaker 16 (12:56):
Okay, this is a center on Field Chance I with
the Colorado Springs Police Department Internal Affairs Section Today's February seventeenth,
twenty twenty two. Also president is the General Affairs, Sergeant
Drew Jealous.
Speaker 1 (13:08):
Lieutenant Chanza asked the woman about how she met Joel.
She explained it was on a fetish and king social
network called betlife dot com. And as a note, we've
altered the voices of all the civilians interviewed by CSPD
to protect their privacy.
Speaker 16 (13:24):
What was it that initially drew your attention to the
person we're talking about today?
Speaker 17 (13:28):
He contacted me, just like Facebook has messenger, that there's
a messenger within it.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
Joel had suggested that they meet at a public park.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
I drove in my vehicle to go meet him.
Speaker 17 (13:44):
When I got to the location, which was Memorial Park,
he was in what looked like an unmarked police car.
Speaker 3 (13:54):
I imagine the first question would be, how would I
know that. I've got a number.
Speaker 17 (13:58):
Of officers in my family who I've seen their unmarked vehicles.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
I do know what they look like. He could see.
I was nervous.
Speaker 17 (14:09):
I was shaken, and at that point it probably should
have stopped.
Speaker 16 (14:16):
Did the two if you have anything in common, any
fetishes as you describe them, that that kind of made
you kind of continue the conversation.
Speaker 17 (14:26):
Yes, he was into domination and I was into submission.
He told me that he would enjoy spanking me and
fisting me and.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
Choking me and pulling my hair.
Speaker 9 (14:46):
So what leads you to believe that this person was
a police officer?
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Stated he was?
Speaker 9 (14:51):
Can you tell us a little more about that.
Speaker 17 (14:53):
He eventually told me his name, and you know, eventually
told me that he was a police officer with Springs
Police told me he did traffic investigations.
Speaker 9 (15:07):
So when he told you his name, what name did
he give you?
Speaker 3 (15:12):
Joel Kerr?
Speaker 16 (15:17):
Were you physically harmed in any way? I know you
said it bruised. Were you harmed in any way during
this encounter?
Speaker 17 (15:25):
I mean I was bruised, and that's about the extent
of it.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
The dammage Jo's suffer is on me.
Speaker 16 (15:32):
Was there any aspect of this meeting that was non consensual?
Speaker 17 (15:37):
From your perspective, this isn't about digging into his life
and trying to harm him. It is simply about as
an officer, he should not be using his vehicle to
(15:57):
have what I imagine this probably not the first rendezvous.
Speaker 9 (16:03):
What makes you say that that that you believe this
wasn't his.
Speaker 17 (16:06):
First because he discussed enjoying having meetups such as this.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
This woman had come to regret her actions and confessed
to her husband. She gave her husband access to her
computer and all her passwords. She was remorseful about the
encounter and took responsibility for her part in it. The
woman fully disclosed her actions to her husband and agreed
to accompany him to Joel's house. However, as you heard,
(16:38):
things didn't.
Speaker 5 (16:39):
Go as planned.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
They of course reported him. The woman's story was credible,
and when police searched Joel's phone and computer, they found
evidence supporting her story. And then they identified another woman
Joel had met up with. He planned this one on
his work phone, but it seemed like he forgot to
delete a few messages from the exchange. This woman had
(17:05):
also met Joel on fet life. Although she was cooperative,
she seemed less eager to discuss the encounter. An internal
affairs sergeant contacted her by phone.
Speaker 12 (17:16):
So you started talking, you think online in August twenty
twenty one. You spoke on the phone, he would call you,
and you spoke through WhatsApp. When's the first time you
said you met. When's the first time you actually met
in person.
Speaker 18 (17:28):
I believe that he was a conference in Denver and
we just met briefly when he was on his way back,
like the last day that he was going back to
the Springs.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
The woman and Joel had talked and texted for several weeks.
He had attended a work conference in Denver. After talking
online and on the phone, there was an opening to
meet up. On the way back from the conference, they
met in the parking lot of a sporting goods store.
But here was the information Internal affairs was really after
(17:58):
had Joel used his police car to have sex with her?
And was it while he was on duty?
Speaker 12 (18:05):
Was there anything in that vehicle that made you think
that it was probably not his personal vehicle radio, the.
Speaker 18 (18:12):
Police radio with Canner or whatever you call him.
Speaker 12 (18:15):
You got into a silver Esub you don't remember the
maker model, but you believe it was a police vehicle
because it has a radio in it. Maybe there for
twenty to thirty minutes and engaged in vaginal sex in
the backseat of that vehicle. Yeah, And other than that,
there was no other meetings. You've still talked as friends,
(18:37):
but no sex. No, no, And let me ask this.
I was reading through some text messages between you and Joel,
and one of them says like something about there's been
some drama and I've deleted everything not to worry about it.
Do you remember that text thread?
Speaker 18 (18:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (18:58):
What was that about?
Speaker 18 (19:00):
I mean, he told me that there was something going on.
I didn't really go into detail, but I guess that
wasn't surprise when I got your message yesterday.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Despite Joel's adamant denials, it appeared he had in fact
had sex in his police vehicle during work hours. CSPD
conducted a full investigation. Internal affairs even ordered a forensic
analysis of the car's interior. They determined that the complaint
was true. Joel had been having sex with women in
(19:58):
his police car in public on company time. On April eleventh,
Joel was summoned to a meeting with his commander, and
you'll hear that meeting in a later episode. And it
was on that day that he could no longer hide
the investigation from Caroline and their kids. In the early
(20:20):
evening on April eleventh, twenty twenty two, Joel was home
with his family. Caroline and Nicole sat huddled together on
the living room sofa. There were tears, accusations, and grief.
Their son was on speakerphone from college, alternating between anguish
and disgust.
Speaker 5 (20:39):
As he sat in our home. He swore up and
down to the kids. It was only two times. It
was only these two people.
Speaker 6 (20:44):
That's it.
Speaker 5 (20:45):
It was only these two people.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
He was only admitting to what the CSPD had already uncovered. Meanwhile,
he told his family a tearful story about what happened.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
He said, I started going down a rabbit hole online
when I worked at night, and I would see these
different websites, and out of curiosity, I started corresponding with
different people on different websites, and that's how I met
these two people. It was only these two times. It
was only these two times.
Speaker 6 (21:14):
I was just astonished that he could do this to
our family.
Speaker 7 (21:20):
Well I could keep saying, was how could you do
this to my mom and my sister?
Speaker 15 (21:25):
How could you do this?
Speaker 5 (21:28):
You know, it's one thing to try to digest that
when you have just been betrayed by your spouse, but
see here and watch your kids. It's just a completely
different level.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
Joel insisted that he only had been unfaithful with two people,
but Caroline wasn't naive. She knew there had to be more.
Speaker 14 (21:53):
You know, I had enough sense to say, if I
secure a divorce attorney and they were to do an
open records Request act, what else would they find in
your file and he looked terrified.
Speaker 1 (22:08):
With Caroline's words still hanging in the air, Joel dropped
another bombshell. Back in episode one. We learned he'd been
tapped form one of the departments and most sought after roles,
the public information officer. He'd be the face of the department,
the media liaison, the voice. He'd already done the job temporarily,
(22:30):
then out of nowhere, the offer vanished.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
He said, I had a falling out with the chief.
And I said, you had a falling out with the
chief of police, and he said, I had a falling
out with him, and he's taken away my opportunity to
be the public information officer.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
But that had been a lie. There hadn't been an
issue with the chief. The issue had been with Joel.
Speaker 5 (22:56):
He did not get the public information officer position because
of sexual harassment.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
While Joel served as temporary public Information officer in twenty sixteen,
he asked female reporters to use an encrypted app to
communicate with him, and what he said there unnerved the reporters.
When one reporter heard Joel Kern was going to be
appointed the permanent Public Information officer in twenty nineteen, she
was alarmed and wrote a letter here's how it began
(23:28):
to the Colorado Springs Police Department. I'm writing to voice
my concerns about naming Lieutenant Jul Kern the next PIO.
To accuse anyone of inappropriate behavior is a risk, But
to accuse an officer, especially one that controls which media
members get information and how fast, could be career suicide.
(23:49):
But that is what most emboldened me to voice my concerns. Now,
this letter led to Joel Kern's first internal affairs investigation
for sexually harassing female news reporters. The CSPB started by
interviewing the reporter that wrote the letter.
Speaker 11 (24:08):
This is Commander Tishossky with Carrs Friends Police Department Internal
Affairs Section. Today's February seventh, twenty nineteen.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
Internal Affairs asked the reporter about the app J'll ask
her to download.
Speaker 8 (24:21):
He encouraged me to get the WhatsApp so that we
could communicate in a way that his phone would be
more secure from the police department, as in, if he
was giving me tips of some sort, so that it
would be encrypted and it would be on his personal
phone and it could be taken That kind of stuff.
(24:42):
He never explicitly said, do you want to do anything
with me? Or like he never explicitly asked me out,
or you know, things like that. Nature it is all
very sneaky, and about interpretation, you mean sneaky sneakyism. He
(25:03):
would use words that would be suggestive or language that
would be suggestive, and it felt to me like a
test to see how I took it. He brought up
sexual relations with his wife, and again I don't remember
exactly what was said, but I remember that he was
on vacation or at his son's base, or not baseball,
(25:27):
but some kind of sporting event away, and he mentioned
like something along the lines of, you know, maybe I'll
get lucky, or when you have kids, the only time
you have sex is when you're away, or something like that.
That obviously was inappropriate and kind of opened the door
(25:48):
if I wanted to talk about sexual relations.
Speaker 11 (25:51):
You had wrote that this became obvious that the friendlier
I was.
Speaker 5 (25:56):
The more beneficial it could be.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
So tell me about this.
Speaker 11 (26:00):
What do you mean by friendlier?
Speaker 8 (26:02):
If I would have accepted his advances or been sexual
in return, or you know, when I explained, I felt
like he was opened the door to talk about my
sexual life. If I would have done that kind of stuff,
like just given that green light that I'm okay with
this behavior.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Okay, So what was the benefit?
Speaker 8 (26:23):
The benefit was the whole point in telling us, telling
me to get what zapp was. You know, this was
a way for him to give us tips. So the
benefit was if we're friendly, if we had this good relationship,
then he would give us good scoops and tips about
things going on in the police department.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
The reporter knew of other women who felt the same way,
but they either decided it was too risky to complain
or felt it didn't rise to the level of needing
to report. So without any other complaints, the investigation was
relatively thin and it looked like Joel was going to
talk his way out of this one. We actually received
(27:03):
the recording of Joel doing exactly that.
Speaker 11 (27:09):
This is Commander of Ty Sholshski with Colshman's Police Department
Professional Standards Division. Today is February eleventh, twenty nineteen. I
am interviewing Lieutenant Joel Kern in regards to internal Affairs
case nineteen zero three zero.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
Oshevski asked Joel to explain why he had urged reporters
to download WhatsApp, an encrypted app that his supervisors couldn't monitor.
This was a violation of department rules, and Joel knew it.
Speaker 9 (27:39):
At the time.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
There was like this big thing in the media about
you know, stories being lead and released, and then there's
different apps that people communicate the reporters about to be
like a safe method of communication with the reporters or whatever.
Speaker 3 (27:52):
Safe meaning like secure.
Speaker 1 (27:54):
At first, Joel said it was for security, but the
IA officer wasn't.
Speaker 11 (27:59):
By I'm not, I guess I don't understand if you're
worried about stories leaking, why was it only these two women?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Well, I mean, I see where you're going with that.
And again it's because I was communicating with them the most,
like one.
Speaker 9 (28:18):
That was always asking the questions the most.
Speaker 3 (28:20):
I don't think it was.
Speaker 2 (28:21):
Anything that would be like a targeting thing or anything
like that.
Speaker 11 (28:25):
Were you trying to just target? When you say target,
I mean I think get more friendlier with those two,
maybe hoping it might go somewhere.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
I think if I was honest with myself, then I
would say, yeah, that would be an.
Speaker 9 (28:37):
A curious statement.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Are they young? Are they old or middle aged?
Speaker 9 (28:44):
I guess like twenties, arly, thirties.
Speaker 11 (28:47):
Okay, middle aged Joel, it's like fifty okay.
Speaker 18 (28:53):
Are they attractive? Are they not?
Speaker 5 (28:55):
Okay?
Speaker 11 (28:58):
So you were saying that you were singling those two
out for the WhatsApp of it?
Speaker 3 (29:05):
That sounds bad of it.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Yeah, I think that, if I'm honest with myself, that
would be a fair statement. You know, they're very smart
and like I say, witty and there's fun to talk to.
And then so I think then that's where the flirtation
came in, and then the sexual uino It wouldn't be
something that i'd want my wife or kids reading obviously.
Speaker 11 (29:31):
So Joel, when you're talking about the flirtation, was that
on your part?
Speaker 3 (29:36):
Well, whose part was that on?
Speaker 4 (29:38):
I think it was.
Speaker 9 (29:41):
I think it's like mutual flirtation.
Speaker 10 (29:43):
And then.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
Things weren't good at home.
Speaker 1 (29:50):
Right as the conversation gets to the heart of the issue,
his abuse of power, Dole pivots. He wells up with
tears and changes the subject too what he's been going
through recently.
Speaker 11 (30:03):
Why did you have these conversations with them, the sexual
innuendo conversation.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
That was in a bad place with my marriage at
the time, and emotionally, and then I think I got
maybe just like sucked into a trap or reading things
into things that were being said that we're not really there.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Caroline had no idea her marriage was in a bad
place in twenty nineteen. If you remember from episode one,
Caroline shared Joel had a few breakdowns and ultimately started therapy.
He had mentioned witnessing the carnage from fatal accident scenes
and his fear about their kids starting to drive, but
she'd been there for him and they worked through it
(30:52):
as a couple. As the interview continued, Joel read the room,
he realized his best strategy would be to fall on
the sword.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
I'm embarrassed, I'm humiliated, I'm ashamed. I know what I
did was wrong. I'm very sorry for it, and I've
taken proactive steps to help myself get better again. I
take four responsibility for my actions, and I asked for mercy.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
Joel had been on the record pleading for mercy three
years before his official suspension, which was on April eleventh,
twenty twenty two, and on April eleventh, the truth was
finally being laid bare. In their living room, Caroline and
their daughter were on the couch and their son was
on speakerphone. They listened to Joel confess that he'd been
(31:48):
lying and covering his tracks for years.
Speaker 5 (31:52):
And then he went on a tirade of continuing to
blame me and said that he didn't think we had
sex enough, and then he started making crass comments about
his sexual needs. Our daughter was just wailing and crying,
and our son hung up. He never removed his wedding ring.
(32:13):
He always kept an one, but then he struggled.
Speaker 6 (32:17):
For a long time.
Speaker 5 (32:19):
It finally gets his ring off inside of it I
had engraved forever and ever, sets it down on the fireplace,
walks over and fills up his yetti cup, and just
walked out the door.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Caroline's entire world had come apart in a single afternoon. Immediately,
she reached out to a close friend who would soon
take on a greater role in her life.
Speaker 19 (33:07):
My name is Don and I'm a family law attorney.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
Don was a good friend to both Caroline and Joel.
Speaker 19 (33:15):
I was shocked, absolutely shocked when I heard the news.
For me to not even have an inkling of his
other side, I guess bothered me because they usually have
a pretty good gut feeling about people.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
Don normally made it policy not to represent her friends
in a divorce, but she made an exception this time,
not so much for Caroline, but for the kids.
Speaker 19 (33:39):
The children are very proud of their parents accomplishments. They
really appreciated and respected what they did. That was part
of their identity is that their parents were so great.
So when this all happened, my inkling for the children
(33:59):
was everything that they know, everything that they thought was
good and pure or whatever real is not.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
The kids had to find a way to keep going.
Their son wanted to come home from college, but Caroline
wouldn't allow it, and their daughter.
Speaker 6 (34:20):
Everything happened on a Monday, and that Wednesday, I took
my SATs. I had a plan, like I still needed
to go to college. So, you know, she kind of ingraining.
I guess, the sort of motivation where you need to
do something, you just get it done.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
As for Caroline, she was on autopilot. Her friends came
to her with some unsettling but important advice.
Speaker 5 (34:47):
You know, they let me know, you really should set
doctor's appointment to make sure that I don't have anything
and have a full STI STD screen and so I
called this facility humili asked if I could schedule an
appointment specifically for this. They said yes, And when I
walked in, I tried to keep myself together. And then
(35:10):
I sat in the exam room and this nurse practitioner
who I had seen dozens of times for my kids'
sports physicals, she walked in the room and I just
immediately lost it. I'm in this exam room, I'm crying.
I'm telling her these very personal details of what's just
(35:33):
been revealed. And so she does a full exam and
she leaves the room, and when she came back in,
she just had this horrible, fearful look on her face.
And I just was sobbing, and I said, you can
tell I have something, can't you. You can already tell I
(35:55):
have something, And she shook her head and she said no.
She was debating on telling me that Joel had essentially
been blacklisted from seeing her because he had come in
four different appointments before and had been and appropriate with
(36:16):
his commentary and very sexualized with his commentary toward her.
And I was mortified. And she said, given what I
was going through, if she was in my shoes, she'd
want to know.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
Caroline had as drol repeatedly, what else, what else have
you done? She didn't want any more surprises. There had
to be more than just two affairs, and this experience
was confirmation that her instincts were dead on.
Speaker 5 (36:47):
I was just humiliated hearing from another female that my
husband had approached them in a manner that made them
feel so uncomfortable that they could not even professionally see.
It was humiliating, absolutely humiliating. I got to the parking
lot and I called him and he answered, and I
(37:10):
said to him, this is what was just told to me.
And he was very calm, and he said, I'm sorry.
And I said, you knew this and he said yes,
they let me know, and I knew how I behaved,
and I'm embarrassed. And he was just so matter of
(37:30):
fact about it. And I was infuriated, absolutely infuriated. And
I saw his location and I drove to the campsite
where he was at at the RV park.
Speaker 1 (37:44):
Joel was staying in their family RV at a campground.
Speaker 5 (37:47):
And I just started banging on the door and he
opened the door and I told him, do not lie
to me, do not lie to me. I want to
know what you have done. You are someone who I
don't even know, and I want to know the secret
life that you have lived behind our backs.
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Nicole was at school when she noticed Caroline's location on
their Family Life three sixty app.
Speaker 13 (38:17):
I don't really want to have my mom alone with
my dad because I was really scared of my dad
because I thought like he did all this stuff without
us knowing.
Speaker 5 (38:30):
I don't know what he's capable of. Next thing, you know,
there's banging at the door of our RV. She just
got up and left her classroom at the high school
and drove to where we were at, and as we
were sitting there, she walked calmly over to a laptop
(38:50):
he had taken from our home.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
Nicole grabbed Joel's computer and started looking through it, logging
onto various websites and reading his emails and text messages.
They were there for the truth. All those long nights
on duty. What else had Joel been up to? How
far did his misconduct go?
Speaker 5 (39:10):
Suddenly, through our daughter's forensic reveal of his computer, the
number of people he had sex with just started growing dramatically.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
Nicole dialed in her older brother. She wanted him to
hear everything, so it became the next family meeting, and
then Nicole started recording on her phone. She wanted documentation.
She and her mom were running on adrenaline.
Speaker 9 (39:40):
Cat and mouse, Cat and mouse, Cat and mouse.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
You just have to keep being caught.
Speaker 1 (39:44):
Why can't you just spell it all out?
Speaker 9 (39:46):
Because I can't remember everything because you.
Speaker 5 (39:48):
Had so many people.
Speaker 6 (39:51):
How many people didn't talk to?
Speaker 5 (39:54):
Fifteen one hundred? What's the range?
Speaker 10 (39:58):
Fifty sounds good?
Speaker 5 (40:01):
How many times did you actually physically meet someone?
Speaker 2 (40:07):
This is why I'm telling you, like around the seven ten.
Speaker 6 (40:12):
And then another thought I had today, I cannot drive
around the city without questioning. I wonder if my did
received oral sex.
Speaker 3 (40:22):
And this parking lot.
Speaker 13 (40:26):
Remember that day we went.
Speaker 10 (40:27):
To Memorial Park.
Speaker 6 (40:28):
We looked at the police memorial.
Speaker 5 (40:31):
And all that you wanted us to see the police memorial.
Speaker 6 (40:34):
We ran races over by Memorial Park.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
Memorial Park was where Joel met the first woman to
have sex in his cop car. At first he denied
he was working when they met up.
Speaker 6 (40:46):
But then I know.
Speaker 3 (40:48):
Where I told you after work earlier, but.
Speaker 10 (40:55):
I'm pretty sure it was like mid morning or lunchtime
or whatever. And then went back to work and then
worked out and took a shower and all that, so you.
Speaker 5 (41:07):
Left work, went and had sex with someone on the
city's dime.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
Everyone thought Joel was one of the good ones, an
honorable cop. They had sacrificed so much for his career.
She didn't recognize this man. In fact, she didn't recognize
her life at all. Her life was now split into two,
two realities running parallel tracks. There were her memories, and
(41:40):
then there was everything Joel was doing.
Speaker 5 (41:42):
Behind her back.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
All of those late nights, the miss sports games, the holidays.
Where was he? Her brain never went there. She didn't
know what was real anymore. It was a sad and
terrifying feeling.
Speaker 5 (42:00):
The kids and I thought we were living this life
of love and a family. I'm purity more things perfect,
of course not do we argue about taking trash out
and who was going to pick up from dinner yup?
(42:21):
But never did I think that anything like this was
going on behind our backs.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
Ever, So was this finally the full picture? We're all
of Joel's secrets out in the open. No, not even close.
Here's Caroline and Joel's son.
Speaker 7 (42:44):
I'm not naive to the fact that all of us
are human, and everybody makes mistakes, and everybody has their shortcomings,
and everybody has flaws and demons that they with but
to me, there's a clear line here between being a
(43:07):
fallible person and monstrosity.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
On the next episode of Betrayal, Caroline comes to the
realization that Joel has been gaslighting her for years.
Speaker 5 (43:23):
So I'm literally watching the phone where I can see
him speeding to our house. He's not at another accident,
he's not at the hospital. He's coming from somewhere. And
so when he got home, I said, are you lying
to me?
Speaker 1 (43:40):
And more revelations about his double life are exposed. Thank
you for listening to Betrayal season four. If you would
like to reach out to the Betrayal team, email us
at Betrayal Pod at gmail dot com. That's Betrayal Pod
at gmail dot com. Also, please be sure to follow
(44:01):
us on Instagram at Betrayal Pod and me Andrea H.
Gunning for all Betrayal content, news and updates. One way
to support the series is by subscribing to our show
on Apple Podcasts. Please rate and review Betrayal. Five star
reviews help us know you appreciate what we do. Betrayal
is a production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment.
(44:23):
Group in partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive
produced by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Fason. Betrayal is hosted
and produced by me Andrea Gunning, written and produced by
Carrie Hartman, also produced by Ben Fetterman. Our associate producers
are Caitlin Golden and Kristin Melcurie. Our iHeart team is
Ali Perry and Jessica Crincheck. Story editing by Monique Leboard,
(44:48):
audio editing and mixing by Matt Delvecchio, editing by Tanner Robbins,
and special thanks to Caroline and her family. Betrayal's theme
is composed by Oliver Baines. Music library provided by mid
Music and For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts,
Popular Podcasts
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
True Crime Tonight
If you eat, sleep, and breathe true crime, TRUE CRIME TONIGHT is serving up your nightly fix. Five nights a week, KT STUDIOS & iHEART RADIO invite listeners to pull up a seat for an unfiltered look at the biggest cases making headlines, celebrity scandals, and the trials everyone is watching. With a mix of expert analysis, hot takes, and listener call-ins, TRUE CRIME TONIGHT goes beyond the headlines to uncover the twists, turns, and unanswered questions that keep us all obsessed—because, at TRUE CRIME TONIGHT, there’s a seat for everyone. Whether breaking down crime scene forensics, scrutinizing serial killers, or debating the most binge-worthy true crime docs, True Crime Tonight is the fresh, fast-paced, and slightly addictive home for true crime lovers.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com