May 30, 2025 • 6 mins
In this week’s monologue, Ed Zitron walks you through the awesome world of handheld gaming PCs - and why you should pick one up over a Nintendo Switch 2.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
All ze media, hell, and welcome to this week's Better
Offlying Monologue. I'm your host ed zytron. What and let's
start with one point. Fuck Nintendo. Back in February, Nintendo
said that shortages of the Nintendo Switch will not be
(00:22):
a problem and came up with a genius to quote
motiple outlets means of keeping scalpus from buying them all
by requiring those buying on Nintendo dot Com to have
at least twelve months of Nintendo Online memberships as well
as fifty combined hours of Nintendo Switch gameplay. Two weeks
before launched, Nintendo America boss Doug Bowser and yes that
is his name, said that the company believed it would
have enough units to meet consumer demand throughout the holidays.
(00:46):
Guess what, They didn't make enough, and now the Nintendo
Switch too is sold out everywhere, with scalpus charging hundreds
of dollars extra on eBay. If you're someone who's gonna
email saying you are easily able to buy one, you're
an exception to the rule and you fucking know it.
Fuck Nintendo. They do this shit every time, creating artificial
scarcity and then blaming on unanticipated demand that they know
(01:06):
will be there. They do this every single time. They
did it back with the fucking Wei. It happens every
time I despise this company. They have this weird, fucked
up relationship with consumers where they turn them into pay pigs,
where it's just like, Hey, we're gonna re We're gonna
do the new Zelda game you want? You want to
do that dance for me, you little piglert. And I
say this to someone who's bought a Nintendo Switch. Ah No,
(01:28):
I'm just of the companies I'm most tired of kind
of Nintendo's up there. While they may have their nice ecosystem, Wait,
I'm not talking about a Nintendo here. I have a
better suggestion, a much better suggestion, by a portable gaming
PC instead. Since the Steam Deck launched in twenty twenty two,
you've been able to play a remarkable amount of very
very good games like Eldon Ring and boarders Gate three
(01:50):
with better graphics. No need to have cash to a
company that fucking lies to you every time they launch
a console. There's the Steam Deck and it's o led
screened upgrade. Pick. There's the MSI cl or seven. Lenova's
leadion go and one I actually got sent by Aesus recently.
They're rog Alix, and I really like it. One thing, though,
there is a downside other than in the case of
(02:10):
the Steam Deck, and it's Windows. Windows eleven is really
really funky with these handhelds. I'm gonna do a far
more developed episode than the rog Alix and others when
I've spent more time with it. But Windows really does
not like the handheld form factor, and Microsoft has clearly
not made much of an effort to make sure that
probably the most interesting form factor in PC gaming, if
not gadgets, in years, actually fucking works now. The reason
(02:34):
I've kind of said the steam Deck is different is
they use their own operating system, steam OS, which is
a Linux based system that really works very well except
for when it comes to anti cheap measures, but that's
just something you'll have to deal with. I know others
are considering doing Steam Os integrations. I really hope so,
because I love steam Os. It's really good. And the
reason I don't play my steam Deck that much is because,
(02:55):
like I got like, I just don't like it doesn't
feel good in my hands. Okay, a lot of these
things are going to be like that for you. It's
why later on I suggest you don't and play with one.
But across the board there's another challenge. There's a battery
life problem two to eight hours allegedly, but if I'm honest,
running a rock Alix at full tilt tobo mode is
going to drain the battery pretty quickly. I haven't done
(03:16):
official battery tests. I was still able to play for
a couple of hours. It was good. I was playing
stuff on full tilt too. But this is one case
where I'm fully willing to say we're only a few
years in battery tech, and chips will get smaller and
these things will last longer. Right now, they fit nicely
in the hand, but they're a touch heavy and get
a little harm which is gannab seleviy for PC gaming.
Either way. While I've played with a few of these handhelds,
(03:37):
the Steam Deck and rock Alix are the ones I've
had the most time with, and Thesis is really great.
It can't really run Doom the Dark Ages very well.
It looks like a PS four PS three version. It's
been great for playing Madden twenty five, Redacted Hades two,
the new Oblivion Reymaster, and a bunch of emulation stuff.
Both the steam Deck and the rock Alix also use
power delivery, which is in a lot of modern charges,
(04:00):
though I will add the rog Alix wanted to charge
at ninety once when I plugged in the other day.
Kind of weird, but I also was playing something a
little bit taxing on it. These things are also not cheap,
and while the steam Deck is three hundred and ninety
nine dollars, it's getting on a bit, and the more
recent yet year old rock Alix is eight hundred bucks,
though we should add it's more powerful and has one
hundred and twenty eight hurt screen. I also really like it,
(04:21):
like I've just been I've been playing with a lot. Yeah,
I know on this show I'm constantly bitching about stuff
such as like one minute ago, But I really do
like the rock Alix. The steam Deck is just too
chunky for me. Too chunky, oh oh if I've got
small hands, but for my hands they're kind of chubby,
just like the rog Alix. More and I will say,
there are other options, two more powerful options, and look,
(04:44):
the GPD Win four it is like a thousand dollars.
It's too much. It doesn't do enough it's not worth
your money. The rock Alix R eight hundred bucks. I
actually really like I think you could. You will be
using this thing for years and you'll be very happy
with them, and you could probably plug it into a
battery when you're charging as well. So going and I'll
say this segment is probably the most exciting part of
the tech industry for me at the moment, and it's
(05:05):
also the way I do most of my gaming. These
consoles work really well. Yeah they're a little bulky right now.
Yeah they got heating things, but there have been significant
leaps between generations as far as power and battery life goes.
I really hope we see more companies get into this space,
and as they do, I'll probably end up playing with
their versions too. I want to do a bigger episode
on handheld PC gaming. I've not done my rounds with
(05:28):
all of them yet, but if you somehow INPRF for
one of these things, email me easy at better Offline
dot com. And I'm looking forward to on a larger
level doing more gaming stuff. Gamers can be a little
bit angry, and I'm sure someone is gonna hear me
say fuck Nintendo and get really upset, But you know
what gaming industry needs a look at too, But there
are really positive things. PC gaming rocks right now. There
(05:50):
are tons of fun games you can play, but also
these handheld gaming there's years of games that work on
them really really well. I mean, I played madd in
twenty five because it's like ASMR for me, but it's nice,
it works really well. I love these things and I
think you will too, So I really recommend if you can.
I think like Best Buy has a lot of them,
go and play with them, pick them up, fill them
(06:10):
in your hands. It's a very personal choice. And yeah,
buy that instead of a Nintendo Switch too. You don't
need to play the latest version of Mario kar Mariocar
has been the same goddamn game for years. You know it,
and so do I. Anyway, that's going to get me
in trouble too. But give these things a go, and yeah,
here you go. A semi positive monologue view for Bloody Once.
(06:31):
Thanks for listening.
All ze media, hell, and welcome to this week's Better
Offlying Monologue. I'm your host ed zytron. What and let's
start with one point. Fuck Nintendo. Back in February, Nintendo
said that shortages of the Nintendo Switch will not be
(00:22):
a problem and came up with a genius to quote
motiple outlets means of keeping scalpus from buying them all
by requiring those buying on Nintendo dot Com to have
at least twelve months of Nintendo Online memberships as well
as fifty combined hours of Nintendo Switch gameplay. Two weeks
before launched, Nintendo America boss Doug Bowser and yes that
is his name, said that the company believed it would
have enough units to meet consumer demand throughout the holidays.
(00:46):
Guess what, They didn't make enough, and now the Nintendo
Switch too is sold out everywhere, with scalpus charging hundreds
of dollars extra on eBay. If you're someone who's gonna
email saying you are easily able to buy one, you're
an exception to the rule and you fucking know it.
Fuck Nintendo. They do this shit every time, creating artificial
scarcity and then blaming on unanticipated demand that they know
(01:06):
will be there. They do this every single time. They
did it back with the fucking Wei. It happens every
time I despise this company. They have this weird, fucked
up relationship with consumers where they turn them into pay pigs,
where it's just like, Hey, we're gonna re We're gonna
do the new Zelda game you want? You want to
do that dance for me, you little piglert. And I
say this to someone who's bought a Nintendo Switch. Ah No,
(01:28):
I'm just of the companies I'm most tired of kind
of Nintendo's up there. While they may have their nice ecosystem, Wait,
I'm not talking about a Nintendo here. I have a
better suggestion, a much better suggestion, by a portable gaming
PC instead. Since the Steam Deck launched in twenty twenty two,
you've been able to play a remarkable amount of very
very good games like Eldon Ring and boarders Gate three
(01:50):
with better graphics. No need to have cash to a
company that fucking lies to you every time they launch
a console. There's the Steam Deck and it's o led
screened upgrade. Pick. There's the MSI cl or seven. Lenova's
leadion go and one I actually got sent by Aesus recently.
They're rog Alix, and I really like it. One thing, though,
there is a downside other than in the case of
(02:10):
the Steam Deck, and it's Windows. Windows eleven is really
really funky with these handhelds. I'm gonna do a far
more developed episode than the rog Alix and others when
I've spent more time with it. But Windows really does
not like the handheld form factor, and Microsoft has clearly
not made much of an effort to make sure that
probably the most interesting form factor in PC gaming, if
not gadgets, in years, actually fucking works now. The reason
(02:34):
I've kind of said the steam Deck is different is
they use their own operating system, steam OS, which is
a Linux based system that really works very well except
for when it comes to anti cheap measures, but that's
just something you'll have to deal with. I know others
are considering doing Steam Os integrations. I really hope so,
because I love steam Os. It's really good. And the
reason I don't play my steam Deck that much is because,
(02:55):
like I got like, I just don't like it doesn't
feel good in my hands. Okay, a lot of these
things are going to be like that for you. It's
why later on I suggest you don't and play with one.
But across the board there's another challenge. There's a battery
life problem two to eight hours allegedly, but if I'm honest,
running a rock Alix at full tilt tobo mode is
going to drain the battery pretty quickly. I haven't done
(03:16):
official battery tests. I was still able to play for
a couple of hours. It was good. I was playing
stuff on full tilt too. But this is one case
where I'm fully willing to say we're only a few
years in battery tech, and chips will get smaller and
these things will last longer. Right now, they fit nicely
in the hand, but they're a touch heavy and get
a little harm which is gannab seleviy for PC gaming.
Either way. While I've played with a few of these handhelds,
(03:37):
the Steam Deck and rock Alix are the ones I've
had the most time with, and Thesis is really great.
It can't really run Doom the Dark Ages very well.
It looks like a PS four PS three version. It's
been great for playing Madden twenty five, Redacted Hades two,
the new Oblivion Reymaster, and a bunch of emulation stuff.
Both the steam Deck and the rock Alix also use
power delivery, which is in a lot of modern charges,
(04:00):
though I will add the rog Alix wanted to charge
at ninety once when I plugged in the other day.
Kind of weird, but I also was playing something a
little bit taxing on it. These things are also not cheap,
and while the steam Deck is three hundred and ninety
nine dollars, it's getting on a bit, and the more
recent yet year old rock Alix is eight hundred bucks,
though we should add it's more powerful and has one
hundred and twenty eight hurt screen. I also really like it,
(04:21):
like I've just been I've been playing with a lot. Yeah,
I know on this show I'm constantly bitching about stuff
such as like one minute ago, But I really do
like the rock Alix. The steam Deck is just too
chunky for me. Too chunky, oh oh if I've got
small hands, but for my hands they're kind of chubby,
just like the rog Alix. More and I will say,
there are other options, two more powerful options, and look,
(04:44):
the GPD Win four it is like a thousand dollars.
It's too much. It doesn't do enough it's not worth
your money. The rock Alix R eight hundred bucks. I
actually really like I think you could. You will be
using this thing for years and you'll be very happy
with them, and you could probably plug it into a
battery when you're charging as well. So going and I'll
say this segment is probably the most exciting part of
the tech industry for me at the moment, and it's
(05:05):
also the way I do most of my gaming. These
consoles work really well. Yeah they're a little bulky right now.
Yeah they got heating things, but there have been significant
leaps between generations as far as power and battery life goes.
I really hope we see more companies get into this space,
and as they do, I'll probably end up playing with
their versions too. I want to do a bigger episode
on handheld PC gaming. I've not done my rounds with
(05:28):
all of them yet, but if you somehow INPRF for
one of these things, email me easy at better Offline
dot com. And I'm looking forward to on a larger
level doing more gaming stuff. Gamers can be a little
bit angry, and I'm sure someone is gonna hear me
say fuck Nintendo and get really upset, But you know
what gaming industry needs a look at too, But there
are really positive things. PC gaming rocks right now. There
(05:50):
are tons of fun games you can play, but also
these handheld gaming there's years of games that work on
them really really well. I mean, I played madd in
twenty five because it's like ASMR for me, but it's nice,
it works really well. I love these things and I
think you will too, So I really recommend if you can.
I think like Best Buy has a lot of them,
go and play with them, pick them up, fill them
(06:10):
in your hands. It's a very personal choice. And yeah,
buy that instead of a Nintendo Switch too. You don't
need to play the latest version of Mario kar Mariocar
has been the same goddamn game for years. You know it,
and so do I. Anyway, that's going to get me
in trouble too. But give these things a go, and yeah,
here you go. A semi positive monologue view for Bloody Once.
(06:31):
Thanks for listening.
Host
Ed Zitron
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