May 28, 2025 • 39 mins
Bombing with Eric Andre will return with new episodes next week. Please listen to this classic episode with comedian, Sarah Squirm!
Eric and pal of the pod, Sarah Squirm, talk about opening for parents weekend and how it's hard to make mom and dad laugh. Talks of SNL ensue and how it's great to collectively bomb as a cast and why people get the rush of stress on live television. This isn't TikTok, this isn't Instagram, THIS IS LIVE TELEVISION BABY!
Tell us your most cringeworthy bombs! Call 716-BOMBING (716-266-2464) and leave a voicemail.
For all things Eric Andre and Bombing follow @ericfuckingandre (Instagram) and @ericandre (TikTok).
Rate and review Bombing with Eric Andre here!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Another week, another episode. Do you know how it goes? People?
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Come on, It's me you boy, Eric Andre, and thanks
for tuning in to another illustrious episode of Bombing, the
podcast where I talk with friends, comedians, musicians, and other
creative people about their worst moments on stage, absolutely tanking
in front of a live audience. Our guest is another
good friend, the phenomenal hilarious Sarah Sherman aka Sarah Squirm.
(00:25):
She's on TV and you can find her touring her
show live and in the flesh. We got to be
in person and hang out as always. Please subscribe to
the podcast to.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Get new episodes every week rate of five stars and
on Apple podcast subscriber Big Money Players Diamond to get
an exclusive clip from my chat with Squirm, plus add
free episodes weekly.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Let's get into it Bombing with Eric Andre. Okay, so
tell us your.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
Have a list?
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Okay, yeah, tell us your bobbing. Sorry, let's the worst
you ever bobbed on stage?
Speaker 4 (01:03):
Recently?
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Oh no, yes, no, I was doing a.
Speaker 4 (01:07):
Show at University of Connecticut.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Shout out, were you headlining or opening?
Speaker 4 (01:12):
It was me and James Austin Johnson for US and
l CO headlining okay, because listen, I'm just like you
common people. I co headline to Okay, it doesn't have
to help me. The stars and we were both supposed
to do I think like forty five minutes. And it
was parents weekend at Yukon, so I was like, also
the parents like bringing the younger siblings. Oh, they were
(01:34):
like ten year old, eleven year old mommy daddy?
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Why why are you think? What do they want?
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Here's the thing, the job of the comedian, truly, I
believe this. If you're getting paid to do a show,
just get her done. Just just if I'm getting paid
to do a show. It's like I'm a mechanic, get
got to fix the car. Okay, So if you're gonna
I know I'm weak.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
But if you're a jazz musician and they want death amount,
then don't.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
But it's like, if you're a jazz musician and you're
hired to do Parents begin at Yukon, just do parent
Just do that. And for some reason, I literally like, okay,
forty five minutes to the host. Jake Nordwin, really funny
writer at SNL, was hosting the show and he told
a story where he was doing a stand up show
(02:23):
at Cornell, and he in the story he's bombing so
hard at Cornell that somebody in the audience stands up
and says, we don't like this. So he tells that
story and then he brings me up. And then I'm
literally pin drop crickets, silent bomb, shelter, blown out, nuclear
(02:44):
disaster zone, silence, bombing, bombing, bombing, like literally Heroshima bombing
forty five minutes. I'm twenty five minutes into complete and
total death, deathly hollows, silence, and a kid in the bag,
and goes.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
We don't like that, No, so his story set up
the kid in the the kid got to like slam
dunk a call back from the previous thing. He job.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
I'm like literally standing ovation lap. I still have like
twenty minutes to go, and I didn't even have a
good comeback, like in the moment you always wish you
could have a good comeback, like I think I just.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Went like oh like O.
Speaker 4 (03:28):
I went, but I went like I just didn't have it.
It was such a like like shot in the face
like AK forty seven. Then I didn't I didn't have anything.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
And then I all alone too. No one's on your
side at that point.
Speaker 4 (03:42):
That's the amazing thing about us. And hell, dude, like
I coming from stand up, I've always been alone. And
then all of a sudden, it's like, wait a minute,
now I have a job wearing with other people because
you can bomb on us now in a sketch. But
guess what you get like five and the people with
you on stage?
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, you can spread them, could
spread the blame or like also the U didn't write
the sketch too, but your stand up you wrote.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
So I've written sketches that have bombed, and then I've
written sketches that have bombed, and then it takes everyone
down with me. But at least I don't have to
go down alone.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
But you look to your life, look to your right,
and you go like, eh, sorry.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Do you really have old school cute cards like from
back in the day? Not a teleprompter written because the
show is it was it's a steampunk show.
Speaker 4 (04:28):
It's a steampunk show.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
They used technology from like fifty years ago.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Commits to the pavement it's literally.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
What what does that mean? Hooves to the pavement.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
We're going, Who's to the pavement? Locomotive style?
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Hooves to the pavement is crazy.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
Boots to the cobblestone steampunk.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Okay, that's how we're going We're going wrong old school.
There's somebody that writes the.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
Because everything changes last minute, Like you could be changing
in Joe.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
Changing were they changing last minute for who? Once that
changed that last minute?
Speaker 4 (05:04):
Well, it could literally be like we literally because it's
like live television, it could be like, oh, we literally
have to end the show in five minutes, which means
that you have to take thirty seconds out of your sketch.
So you're there doing like like Jigsaw puzzle, figuring out,
cutting shit out, how to like condense sketches because you're
like have to some some There was a really popular
(05:25):
sketch this season called Lisa from Temecula that, like Chay
wrote on that like blew up when exploded, went totally
viral and it's really funny. And they were live editing
that sketch while it was happening. No, yes, so like
were changing. Yes?
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Why make it so stressful? Who? What is the point
of that stretch? Who is that for?
Speaker 4 (05:51):
It's like me terror?
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Why it doesn't need to be live either, just pre
film it? Why selling something like as live It's like
that's Stephen Funk too, Like it's live, baby, Like, so
sports need to be live nothing else.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
People do watch us, and I like at sports, like
they'll be like Sarah Sherman's having a flop of a season.
I've been looking at her stats. She's in four schedule,
you know.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
But that's not healthy. But there's no point to that stress.
Just filming, filming the day before filming Friday, guess, and
then you have your Saturday off.
Speaker 5 (06:27):
Look what's happening, Look, what's happening. What's happening? Look like
I'm Eric Andre I'm gonna tict it to my phone.
I'm adicted to Instagram. I'm gonna take it to TikTok.
I go guess what. How about I take you back
to the good old days of real live razzle, dazzle lights.
Speaker 4 (06:40):
Can't action show business, Honey, this is showbiz. This isn't TikTok.
Watch me make a sandwich in my dirty kitchen. This
is Hollywood.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
You wouldn't have to be rewriting the thing thirty seconds
into the thing. You can film Friday, then Saturday you
have your whole week en off. You can go for
a little walk.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Sleep and think a lot of it's good. It's because
it's like, guess what when you're it's live, I have
to rewrite everything. Guess what. Guess what you're not doing
thinking about how miserable your stupid little life.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
That's okay. So you like the pressure of it. You
like woholism.
Speaker 4 (07:16):
There was I had. So I get really nervous and
sometimes I like literally have to project out puke like
seconds before going on.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Really, yes, I was like that. I think I would
be addicted to like Xanax and Booze if I worked
on that show, because it seems like unbelievable.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
Famously that happens most people are, well, it's not really,
and actually it's not. The vibes at SNL right now
are not drugs, which is interesting. If coffee is a drug,
me a drug famously, But I what I am addicted to.
The drug that I am addicted to from SNL is
(07:52):
zofran Caroin. It's like it like literally magically stops you
from puking because I get nervous and.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
I'm like, have you really vomited fully before? You're not
hyper well because you seem very brave. You don't seem
ever nervous when I see you perform.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 1 (08:15):
I've never seen you get nervous before performance.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
You actually are the person who called me out for
my cope with nerves. On stages, I will have like
laughter dysmorphia, and like literally people will be hooting and
hollering and I won't hear it body, And so then
I'll start doing the thing on stage rum like why
aren't you guys laughing at thiszy fucking idiots? And then
(08:38):
you literally, after what I was opening for you on tour,
you were like, dude, stop saying you're bombing when you're
not bombing.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
You're like, people do that.
Speaker 4 (08:46):
You're like, why are you giving people?
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Don't? Yeah, because then it sex people out, sexy people
out that are laughing. They're like, is she bombing? I
was enjoying the ride, but now she's saying she's bombing
it just like unnecessarily hypnotizes them and wrong direction, I think.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
And I liked what you said. I can't remember exactly
what you said because I don't care. You said something interesting.
You were like, don't for one second let people think
that you're not confident. Why would you do that? You're confident?
You believe in yourself. Why are you even giving them?
Speaker 6 (09:17):
Like?
Speaker 4 (09:18):
It was like amazing. And then the whole rest of
the tour, I was being good.
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Shit, I was talking. I was just talking.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
You're talking, you were on stage, or your dick tuck
between your legs. But this drug that stops you from puking.
So I had to puke really badly. And I was
doing a sketch with Pedro Pascal where like everyone, who
(09:47):
was he.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
So famous all of a sudden because I thought he
was amazing in Narcos. Oh he's got a new.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
Show, I guess, Oh, the Mushroom Show.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
But the show is anti mushroom.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
Somebody told me, oh, because the evil guys are mushrooms.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
I haven't watched it, to be honest, okay, but very attractive.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
He's very hot, and I think everybody's like, I think
he's popping off right now because everyone's like, wait a minute,
he's been slaying this whole time, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
People are catching up right.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
As opposed to people. You know, everyone always knows that
Eric Andre slays everybody. That's true, everybody and no one's
everybody's always saying Eric slays. Eric slayze is.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
I don't know if that's true, but I'll take it.
I will take it. Now, tell me more about bombing.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
Well, in the whole I'm telling you this, So in
the sketch that I have to do with Pedro Pascal, yeah,
the whole time, people are saying crazy stuff to me,
and the whole sketch, all I do is go like hey,
and I'm like reacting with my mouth open like this,
like yeah or whatever. And then right before the sketch,
I really had to peek my brains out, but I couldn't,
(10:49):
so I took a zofran but it wasn't like the chewable,
fast acting kind. So I was like, fuck, I have
to make this happen now, oh God, And so I
chewed up this like supposed to be. It was so disgusting.
It was like, you know, you're supposed to swallow or whatever,
and it turned my tongue pure white, and the whole
sketch I'm supposed to be with my mouth open like
(11:10):
so I was like, well, I have to dye my
tongue so that I ate a bunch of candy. But
I had a puke. So I'm like downing gummy bears
like right, before you go on stage. And if you
watch the sketch, my mouth is open the whole time,
like and my tongue is like bright orange. Some like
a bright orange song. These are this is. I actually
told this story to Hamilton Morris the other night and
(11:33):
he laughed that was my.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Bomb inside I need to laugh.
Speaker 4 (11:39):
So does that counts a social bomb?
Speaker 1 (11:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (11:42):
Oh yeah, I mean I have so many bombing This
wasn't bombing kind of but I was opening for Sandler
at those like Giants.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
I can't imagine.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Have you done a fifteen thousand person arena?
Speaker 1 (11:54):
No I don't. I'm trying to think, well, I have
done fat like I did Coachella and some and like
Beach Goth Festival and I did like.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
But those are outside right.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Yeah so far. I did like Eric Andre Show live,
but I've never done like at Coachella. I just played
the thereman with a dildo for Mac DeMarco for a
not stand up Beach God. I started trying to do
stand up and like the crowd was like, I'm fifty
five different drugs. So I just started like I don't
remember what, just crowd work and just screaming, and then
I just got out of there, and then the other
(12:29):
one was Eric. I never like had to do like
half an hour or whatever for like that many. That
sounds that sounds insane. It doesn't sound like, it doesn't
sound possible, like it's like comedy, like it's impossible.
Speaker 4 (12:44):
It's it's the out outdoors that just reminded me of
another fucking bombing storry. Jesus Christ, how many I have,
like hundreds of bombs.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
It's everybody does.
Speaker 4 (12:55):
The outside one is just like comedy outside you're little,
You're dealing with Oh I'm getting heckled by the sun. Awesome, Yeah,
the God's greatest power, the sun.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:07):
I opened for do you know that band Black MIDI.
They're awesome, They're They're literally I begged to open for them.
They're like my favorite band. It was Central Park summer
stage last year, ninety five degrees out, pure, pure, blinding
son and they have a very young like fan base,
(13:29):
and it was like all ages and I'm like showing
my poopy butthole videos and I'm like, oh, these sixteen
year olds will need to see these poopy buttholes. And
I'm like feeling that a bomb. It was a bomb,
and then apparent and then my friend sent me a
Reddit thread. They said, yo, check this out lol, and
sent me a Reddit thread that was like a video
(13:50):
of my set at Summer Stage again ninety five degree
he pure blazing sun. So I'm being like, Sarah, squirm,
kill yourself, you.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Sung, Why would your friends send that to you?
Speaker 4 (14:01):
Like literally send it to me, like l O L.
People always be doing right.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Yeah. I think people think it's like, oh, yeah, you're
gonna be great.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
But you have where people are are like you, you're crazy.
You're gonna like this crazy thing someone said about you.
And then some you know, someone sends me a YouTube
comment that's like serious, squirm, I'm gonna come in your
mouth till you explode or something. It's like, I don't
want to.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
See that to you. That's fun.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
But the outside is one thing. It's like, forget about it.
But like the inside stadium shows are like because so
much of my stand up is just like I'm screaming
in repetition, like and it's like absurdist noises, so it's
like it echoes like off the dome. So I get
And then I was getting all confused because I would
(14:50):
just hear myself back at me and i'd be like,
oh no, I want to. But it's really it is
fun because you're like, oh my god, this is like
a once in a lifetime opportunity. I can imagine it's fun.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
I don't think I've done a show like a fifth
of that big that's like for like the super Bowl, right.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
Yes, well, so, so I opened for Sandler in Kansas
City the day before the super Bowl. But I guess
the Kansas City team, Oh.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
God, Kansas City bugles.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
The bugles were not the super Bowl wasn't in Kansas City,
somewhere else, but like everybody showed up to Sandler show,
like in the.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Bugle and the Chiefs in the gear, in the Chiefs gear.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
And so I was like, oh, it's super Bowl weekend.
I'll do like my big super Bowl joke or whatever
that was. I literally think I said, like, the super
Bowl is this weekend, honey. The only super Bowl I
care about is like the giant toilet Bowl. I'm gonna
need to accomminate all the liquid shit I have spewing
(15:53):
out of my tiny little Jewish asshole from all the
fucking Kansas City barbecue, like a full joke or like
the super Bowl, I need a super Bowl that's super
big enough. Well, my, the diarrhea coming out of as
or whatever.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, and so so irony is not for the like
ironic like a joke that's this is what I have
to learn over twenty years hard way. The joke that's
funny because it's ironically bad is not for the masses.
Speaker 4 (16:24):
And I kind of lost track with that too.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Probably funny me too, like literally like that's for the
for the because there's no like there's the irony doesn't translate,
especially when.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
It's when you're in a room that big. It's just
set up punchline, get in, get out. Yeah, you just
it's so massive that the sound has to be simple.
The ideas shouldn't be that complicated. The rhythm has to
be smooth. And it's like, I'm just I was just
beefing it. And so I said the super Bowl joke,
and then the entire higher fifteen thousand people start going
(17:02):
like I thought it was booing because it sounded like boo,
but it's so I was like, I'm like Bobby for
fucking Adams, like the goat or whatever, but it's their
Their chant is cheeve. So I said, I was like
(17:23):
sober I'll got my big Jewish as Harry ass diarrhea,
and then I just hear boo and I'm likely they
were saying, jeez, that is confusing.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
It's a strange thing.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
But he like, literally whatever, it's gonna sound like I'm
kissing kissing his ants over here. But it's like he
tears in the giant stadiums. He rips it out and
he's a rock star. Yeah, he's got the guitar music.
He puts on like a show and it's really fun.
You're like, it's awesome to be in a room that big,
and you're like, oh my god, all these people love
(17:58):
Billy Madison.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
That's not gonna azic, it's fucking amazing. It's amazing. What
did he ever do a Billy Madison too? Why did
he never do two's? He never does sequels.
Speaker 4 (18:08):
Because he's like got new ideas everything.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Why is it always like a one er?
Speaker 4 (18:11):
Are you? Are you a sequel?
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Am I a sequel?
Speaker 4 (18:14):
Are you missed a sequel?
Speaker 1 (18:15):
I don't have that guy's career. I'm making three hundred
bucks a week over an adult swim factory.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
Well, I think like he just like has like one
hundred new ideas a day, Like even when I was.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
Madison's So Good, Billy Madison, Happy Go More my two
favorite ones.
Speaker 4 (18:34):
When I was opening for him, I did like two
nights in a row. And his show he does, He'll
do two hours fully and there will be they will
be different hours. It's crazy. He has new ships.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Con took me seventeen years to write forty five minutes for.
Speaker 4 (18:49):
I have a good ten minutes. I've been doing sand
for ten years. I have ten minutes solid. I know.
That's why it's like I wish.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I think when you're like rich, like because what do
you gotta worry about? But I'm like, you have special
doctors playing like blood special bloods inside you and stuff
like that. Oh so you can just like go, so
you could just do like four new hours a day.
Speaker 4 (19:10):
I'm not talking about Adam Sandler with this one, but
there are people who've gotten a little too rich and
their comedy has gotten.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
Oh yeah, not good, very well.
Speaker 4 (19:19):
The jokes have evaporated into thin air. Yes, they've gotten
a little too comfortable.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I've seen some very famous people's specials, like recent specials.
A couple there was no jokes. It was like what
what am I? What is this.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
It's like I'm the queen of not having jokes, so
like I'm one to talk. But it's like we got
it's good.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
We gotta be.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Having a job well. And it's like did they tour
this material and it was doing well? Like how did
they get to this material? The materials?
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Well? What they're just so famous that people go googoo gaga,
But it doesn't matter.
Speaker 6 (20:06):
With Aricodre. With Aricdre, all right, tell me more about bombing.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
You're like you burnt through all your bombing stories already here.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
No, No, that's great. I'm glad that you can't.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
Prepared well because I'm like, obviously bombing is so painful,
but I've done it literally every single day in my life.
So I'm like, but I've never actually sat your you
having to come on this podcast, I like actually had
to like literally develop consciousness around all my bombs and failures,
which is interesting. Like I was like, oh, yeah, this
is a good exercise to like sit down and actually
(20:47):
meditate on all my fucking catastrophic Like I've bombed so
hard that you hear the like like after a bomb
in a movie, when you just hear the like like
like like your and everything's in slow motion.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
Oh.
Speaker 4 (21:07):
One time I was like I was in well because
I came up in.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
The Midwest, Chicago.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Baby angels, what's wasted?
Speaker 1 (21:13):
You have been on stage?
Speaker 7 (21:15):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (21:15):
I like trash all let on stage.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
I like took. I can't do weed, yeah, ego deash
it makes me freak.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (21:24):
I had like the worst of all the drugs. Literally,
it's it's the most powerful drug known to man.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
It's the most it's the worst. It's a guaranteed bad trip.
Every single time.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
I write that down, Hamilton, I had two weed mints.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Next mints mints could be powerful. You don't have any.
Speaker 4 (21:46):
Blacked out for three days and that like full like googling,
am I having a heart attack for three days? And
so I'm like lock out where I was in a
literally could to sleep for three days, to the point
where I made I didn't have a car. I made
my friends take me to Griffith Park at like midnight,
in the middle of the night so I could run
(22:07):
around in circles to tucker myself out because I was
like so jacked up. I was like wired. So it's like, okay,
just take me to Griffth Park. Well, it was also
just save me to the Griffith Park. I'm gonna run
around circles until I get tuckered down and then I'll
finally be tired after days. And then I was running
around and I heard the coyotes or whatever that's what
(22:27):
they are, right yeah, And I like, they're not gonna.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
They're in park right.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
There, literally, and so I hear them like cackling or whatever,
and I get so wigged out that it's like great
now I was up for three more days. So then
I was like, Okay, how do.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
I do a show? Like?
Speaker 4 (22:49):
How do I come down from this? I'll take xanax,
no problem. But then the xanax weirdly kind of makes
me freaked. It like cracks me out in a weird
way where it makes me anxious. Yeah, And so I
was like.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
I don't believe you.
Speaker 4 (23:05):
It makes me, I think, because I'm like, I'm like zonked,
And then I'm like, what's happened? Why is it? But
it makes then I get like I'm still and then
I'm anxious about how it's making me turn into like
a dufis kind of and so then I'm on like
stand up is so physical? You're like you're reacting in
(23:27):
the moment to how an audience has reacted to you,
so your reflexes have to be on. And I'm literally like.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
You were on a weed min no sleep, and then
you took a xanax. Then you went on and I
was like, a show in that stand, why don't you
just can't because I'm addicted? What show this?
Speaker 4 (23:48):
It was like at the satellite or whatever. And I
was like like not and like someone was like, there's
like a Netflix exect here, and I was like, and
I think and and I did this bit like a
guided meditation bit thing. But because I was like so
like fried, I was like getting into my own meditation.
(24:09):
I was kind of like losing the plot. Like I
was kind of like didn't do well. No, of course,
not like sweating. I saw pictures of me. There's like
a line are dripping down my face. I can't perform.
I don't get freaked up anymore, but I can't perform
freaked up?
Speaker 1 (24:26):
What is freaked up?
Speaker 4 (24:27):
Man? Cracked out, suited, whacked.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
You're like a nark from the.
Speaker 4 (24:36):
I am weed is bad.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
It's the worst joke. It's the worst joke I've ever done.
Speaker 4 (24:41):
Lock her up.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
We Lady Jane. All right, so you you came. You
started in the Midwest.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
So I've had like you know, like me, I like
me getting on stage and being like I did a
show in Ohio once, like in this island and that's
like like literally in the middle of Lake Erie that
you have to take a ferry together. It's cool, it's
like it's a party island. It's awful, like parrot heads.
(25:10):
But he's like a sunburnt like Hawaiian shirt. And I
was like, I'm Jewish and someone went Schwitz and I
was like, I was literally like again I didn't have
a good comeback.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Bro's crazy for somebody.
Speaker 4 (25:31):
I'm Jewish Schwitz and I think I was like, yeah,
very good. That's like a lot of my bombs just
like like not handling like I wish I had like
a like like that's all those clips that go viral
online right now. It's like epic stand up comedian like
totally destroyed one heckler dot dot speechless. He did a
(25:55):
total fatality do this dot dot dot Heckler that just
reminded me of another bomb. One time, my first paid
stand up gig, I had a joke that was like
it was like about pubes or something, and there was
like a rhetorical question set up that was like why
do you want women to be hairless? Like so you
(26:17):
could oil them up and send send them down a
toboggan shoot or something like that was a joke, not funny,
It's okay, it's okay, it was it was really it
was like why do you want a hairless woman? So
you could oil him up and send them down a
toboggan shoot or something like that. But the rhetorical question
is like why do you want a hairless woman? Or something?
And like an old Irish guy who was like at
an Irish pub literally six people in the audience or
(26:38):
something like that. He was like, I was like, why
do you want a hairless woman? He goes cause it
feels good again? No comeback, no comeback. I was like, awesome,
What am I supposed to say? Like, I'm like, all
I have is like, okay, you're a pedophile.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Like I don't know what it's you should have just
like vibed out with them.
Speaker 8 (27:00):
Report with Aridre. With Aridre, what's the worst bob You've
ever seen? That you were at a part that you
just saw somebody going through.
Speaker 4 (27:21):
Some ship like I don't want to name. I'm like
trying to like.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
You can you can you can protect the innocent, you
say you can call them mister and missus A or
B or something.
Speaker 4 (27:29):
Well, I hosted an open mic in Chicago. Three years
I hosted Cole's open mic. Shout out. My first comedy
job ever Coleman Bryce. Yes, he the legend paid me.
That was my first comedy job was hosting an open
mic at Cole's Bar and awesome. Me and Rebecca O'Neil
(27:50):
hosted it. And we would put up like fifty comics
a night. So it's like, honey, what I have want
I've seen?
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Do you remember a specific Uh, well.
Speaker 4 (27:56):
There was a guy tweaked out on drugs who wouldn't
get off the stage, and he was screaming that's cool,
and so we had to like physically we had a physic.
We had to literally I had to like call the
bar guys like physically remove them. So I was like, bro,
we got to get through fifty comics and you're on
stage for longer than four minutes and I'm gonna have
to physically move you from the stage. And he was
(28:17):
like to weeaking and then like one time, oh, there
was this guy there's because we would get weirdos. There
was an open mic, and I like, all my ship like,
I'm just like such, you know, I'm not good at
I'm not good at stand all. My jokes are about
being Jewish whatever. So this one you're supposed to say,
(28:37):
you're amazing tucker herself up. But I had like a
lot of jokes about being Jewish. And this guy gets
up and he was like, he was like, I don't
mind the Jewish. I'd suck and and all that longe
like I'd do something, you know, he was like, And
I was like, you don't mind that I'm Jewish. You'd
(28:57):
suck on it all my or something like that. And
he was like, I'd let you do what I read.
I'd go freak mode on it. He said, sougn crazy.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
And everyone was like, you're Jewish, already off to the races, already,
shaky star. I suck it all that.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
I can't remember what what he said, something really good,
but he went in like graphic detail about what it
would be like to have sex.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
With me and stand up. That was bit.
Speaker 4 (29:31):
That was his bit, and well he was he was
a little bit of a one of the town characters.
So honestly, it didn't really bomb that bad, but he
was like in graphic Also, I can't remember if this
is a characters. He's one of the town characters. And
he was. I don't want to say one of his
jokes on the podcast because it's like he on the pod,
(29:53):
because because it's like I want him to have credit
for this joke, and I don't want to just like
say a joke out of turn that I.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
Don't it doesn't matter, just say it is a guy
still doing stand up. I don't think he is well.
Speaker 4 (30:05):
He he used to he I guess was.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
In that man's name Tom Sigur.
Speaker 4 (30:13):
Like in my memory, he had a joke that was
like a riff on like what is it? What is it?
Puff puff pass? But he was like in prison and
he didn't have any teeth, and so he talked about
being in prison and doing a slurp slurp pass blow
drops again and so but it's like, again, this is
(30:35):
not my joke, and I want all credit to him.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Yeah, but it.
Speaker 4 (30:40):
Was like he said, and he would say that.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
He sounds cool.
Speaker 4 (30:44):
Let up, I let go up. After he literally went
on stage was like, I hate Jews, but I fres
got you crazy.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
I was like, all right into it. You were like.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
He did.
Speaker 7 (31:09):
He had two words, my husband, that is how Literally
the the Detroit Bomb, This is really good trouble.
Speaker 4 (31:27):
Is it already done? Bored?
Speaker 1 (31:31):
We keep going.
Speaker 4 (31:33):
This is a good one. So it was like the
punk house in Detroit. We were doing a d Y
touring and we were doing like we were like playing
with a bunch of noise people. We were doing like
d I y houses, so Troumble Flex. The floor was
dirt and it was like all crusties, so it was
like more dogs there than people. And literally, my friend
(31:54):
Ruby McAllister best median the planet, was heckled by a
candle a guy who was like tweeked out on crazy drugs.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
This is a drug, that's what you call them. A candle.
Speaker 4 (32:07):
He was tweeked down on crazy drugs and he had
a like candlelabra candle lit and he just like walked
up to the stage like right against the lip of
the stage and just held a candle, a lit candle,
held a lit candle just like in her face. And
she was like, oh, I'm literally getting heckled by a
candle and we all just like fucking bombed. And then
(32:30):
there was like the whole show. There was a guy
in the back of the venue scribbling on the wall
with grayons. And then there was a Jugglo in the
back of the house the whole time, sitting there silently
in full Jugglo makeup. And his name was Freshness. Shout
out the freshness of the juggler in the droit. He
came correct.
Speaker 7 (32:48):
He had a sequin Fedora full jug whoa.
Speaker 4 (32:54):
Fling shirt with like like magic eight balls on it
that flames, and he brought little picture of me. He
drew a picture.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Oh he was like your first fan, first fan. Yeah,
that's sick.
Speaker 4 (33:05):
He drew a picture. Thank you, Sarah for bringing your
Chicago comedy to Oh.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
So he was like a sweetie, Pat, He's a sweetie.
Speaker 4 (33:14):
But he saw the bomb.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Can the candle?
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Can you how threatening fire?
Speaker 1 (33:23):
Well? This is hell chop this hell chop, this is
the hell This is the hell tap tour that you
talked about.
Speaker 6 (33:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (33:28):
Yeah, I went on tour with the show called hell
Trap Nightmare. And of course if you're going to do
a show called hell Drop Nightmare, you are going to
be inviting hell trap nightmare?
Speaker 1 (33:39):
What was that door?
Speaker 6 (33:39):
Like?
Speaker 4 (33:40):
Well awesome? We were like sleeping in the bathtub, literally
like waking up everybodd bed bugs. We would like do
shows in like people's living rooms and then be like, hey,
do you guys have a microphone? They'd be like no,
like sleeping.
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Rust punk Squatter was like squatter literally squatters right, it's
the Squatters.
Speaker 4 (34:01):
Right, And I was like doing my I would be like,
so I'm Jewish?
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Were you guys eating like bread sandwiches?
Speaker 4 (34:08):
We would like literally e mcdonald' every morning and then
be like, why do we feel sick? Any bugles? Wah wah?
Get an ice coffee froma wah?
Speaker 1 (34:18):
No nutrients in your body.
Speaker 4 (34:19):
The whole tour, the whole tour we would do like
it was I mean it was legitimately awesome because we'd
be like we do like a show in Pittsburgh with
these performance artists who literally played a scarf as an instrument.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
It was were we going to go see the Residents
fifty year anniversary?
Speaker 4 (34:35):
And no pasted already it was in Manhattan, but we
were going to go. I literally texted you I got
his tickets, but then I have works We couldn't go.
But you weren't even in town. It wasn't but.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Oh yeah, we'll wait for their seventy of the university.
Speaker 4 (34:53):
We missed it.
Speaker 1 (34:54):
Oh man, you gotte me to stuff. Man, I don't know.
I was sitting in my apartment. I stare at the wall.
Speaker 4 (35:01):
I buy it. Literally every single time I do anything,
I buy one ticket for me, one ticket for Dan,
one ticket for then I get. Every day you're like,
I'm at the next game.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
I go, thanks for I've been to two Knicks games.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
Every single day. You go, I'm at the next gamp.
Oh I went to Gary Newman without you. That's what
I did.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
Yeah, I'm still upset. I the podcast would be twice
as long if you didn't do that to me. That's
why I'm cutting it short. This is actually the longest episode.
Speaker 4 (35:29):
Because you're like, I'm hungry, my allergies hurt, I gotta
go home. Thanks for coming.
Speaker 1 (35:34):
How do you want to end this?
Speaker 4 (35:35):
I want to think of like a really good bomb
one time. One time I opened up for a metal
band and I really bombed. But I like doing those
shows like Black Mini. Please have me open up for
you again. Even though I talked about how I bombed
opening for you, please seriously, I love you guys, You're
the best man. That was all me when I when
I'm mom well because my bombs are huge, because I
literally show videos of poopy buttholes, and I was like
(35:58):
showing videos a poopy butthole and this all right.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
You already told that story.
Speaker 4 (36:02):
No, it's a new one. I was opening for this
metal band and this guy went fuck you news suck
and everyone's like yeah, yeah. And then the headliner band
that got on, this pump band, meat Wave, who is awesome,
was like to whoever said like they got a stage
and they're like, whoever said, Sarah squirm you suck? Fuck
(36:23):
you Yeah? And then they played cool music.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
That's that's rough. Fuck you.
Speaker 4 (36:32):
You haven't had that.
Speaker 1 (36:34):
Yeah, But I've only open up for bands maybe once
or twice and immediately realized it was bad and like,
never do it. Play played an outdoor played an outdoor festival.
I'd rather be in the perfect environment for stand up
and create a bunch of chaos than be in a
chaotic environment and try to keep up. It's way higher
(36:55):
stakes to go to the laugh factory, yes, or the
comedy store and throw shit all over the stage. And
jump in the audience and be crazy because you're subverting
the convention. If you're already in an environment that's already
punk rock, there's kind of nowhere to go. Sure, So yeah,
I'd rather be like punk rock in the traditional environment.
Speaker 4 (37:21):
And like, I'd rather be a masochist and go into
a no win situation.
Speaker 1 (37:28):
I feel I've been in a million of I've been
in a million of those, but I no longer have
the strength. I can't even do a regular show. I
can't read and I can't do a regular sh I
just a quarantine, like a different I drank so much
(37:49):
in quarantine that I came out.
Speaker 4 (37:50):
You had to read all those cocktail.
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Books, Yeah, there you go. Oh yeah, I would read
through those like crazy. Any other was.
Speaker 4 (37:57):
Reading through a cocktail list ingredient when you get you're
always like asking me, like what am I supposed to
think of, like the conflict in the Middle East, And
I'll send you and I'm like, oh, thanks for the question.
Here's an article. I send you an article you can't
read this reward ass Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
Well, also, I'm on my phone already, so I'm already distracted.
I'm gonna stop down from Instagram to read like some
grueling grim history and Instagram. Yeah, Sarah scrim love yours,
(38:39):
give it up to God, good night, and I'll tell
you where you didn't bomb this podcast with a recon.
All right, listen up, we got some special for you.
Speaker 9 (38:54):
Got a burning story that you're itching to tell about
when you bombed or absolutely failed in life. Now's your
chance to tell me all about it, Babe. I want
to hear your worst, most cringe worthy what the fuck
was I thinking?
Speaker 1 (39:07):
What just happened? Moment?
Speaker 9 (39:08):
So pick up your phone and dial seven one six
Bombing at seven one six two six six twenty four
sixty four and leave me a voicemail and we might.
Speaker 1 (39:18):
Just play it on a future episode.
Speaker 9 (39:20):
Bombing with Eric Andre is brought to you by Will
Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcast. Our executive
producer is Olivia Aguilar, Our producer is Bei Wang, Our
research assistant is David Carliner, our editor in sound designers
Andy Harris, and our art is by Dylan Vanderberg. Go
rate us five stars and drop a review on your
podcast app a choice
Another week, another episode. Do you know how it goes? People?
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Come on, It's me you boy, Eric Andre, and thanks
for tuning in to another illustrious episode of Bombing, the
podcast where I talk with friends, comedians, musicians, and other
creative people about their worst moments on stage, absolutely tanking
in front of a live audience. Our guest is another
good friend, the phenomenal hilarious Sarah Sherman aka Sarah Squirm.
(00:25):
She's on TV and you can find her touring her
show live and in the flesh. We got to be
in person and hang out as always. Please subscribe to
the podcast to.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Get new episodes every week rate of five stars and
on Apple podcast subscriber Big Money Players Diamond to get
an exclusive clip from my chat with Squirm, plus add
free episodes weekly.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Let's get into it Bombing with Eric Andre. Okay, so
tell us your.
Speaker 4 (00:59):
Have a list?
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Okay, yeah, tell us your bobbing. Sorry, let's the worst
you ever bobbed on stage?
Speaker 4 (01:03):
Recently?
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Oh no, yes, no, I was doing a.
Speaker 4 (01:07):
Show at University of Connecticut.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Shout out, were you headlining or opening?
Speaker 4 (01:12):
It was me and James Austin Johnson for US and
l CO headlining okay, because listen, I'm just like you
common people. I co headline to Okay, it doesn't have
to help me. The stars and we were both supposed
to do I think like forty five minutes. And it
was parents weekend at Yukon, so I was like, also
the parents like bringing the younger siblings. Oh, they were
(01:34):
like ten year old, eleven year old mommy daddy?
Speaker 1 (01:38):
Why why are you think? What do they want?
Speaker 4 (01:41):
Here's the thing, the job of the comedian, truly, I
believe this. If you're getting paid to do a show,
just get her done. Just just if I'm getting paid
to do a show. It's like I'm a mechanic, get
got to fix the car. Okay, So if you're gonna
I know I'm weak.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
But if you're a jazz musician and they want death amount,
then don't.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
But it's like, if you're a jazz musician and you're
hired to do Parents begin at Yukon, just do parent
Just do that. And for some reason, I literally like, okay,
forty five minutes to the host. Jake Nordwin, really funny
writer at SNL, was hosting the show and he told
a story where he was doing a stand up show
(02:23):
at Cornell, and he in the story he's bombing so
hard at Cornell that somebody in the audience stands up
and says, we don't like this. So he tells that
story and then he brings me up. And then I'm
literally pin drop crickets, silent bomb, shelter, blown out, nuclear
(02:44):
disaster zone, silence, bombing, bombing, bombing, like literally Heroshima bombing
forty five minutes. I'm twenty five minutes into complete and
total death, deathly hollows, silence, and a kid in the bag,
and goes.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
We don't like that, No, so his story set up
the kid in the the kid got to like slam
dunk a call back from the previous thing. He job.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
I'm like literally standing ovation lap. I still have like
twenty minutes to go, and I didn't even have a
good comeback, like in the moment you always wish you
could have a good comeback, like I think I just.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Went like oh like O.
Speaker 4 (03:28):
I went, but I went like I just didn't have it.
It was such a like like shot in the face
like AK forty seven. Then I didn't I didn't have anything.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
And then I all alone too. No one's on your
side at that point.
Speaker 4 (03:42):
That's the amazing thing about us. And hell, dude, like
I coming from stand up, I've always been alone. And
then all of a sudden, it's like, wait a minute,
now I have a job wearing with other people because
you can bomb on us now in a sketch. But
guess what you get like five and the people with
you on stage?
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, you can spread them, could
spread the blame or like also the U didn't write
the sketch too, but your stand up you wrote.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
So I've written sketches that have bombed, and then I've
written sketches that have bombed, and then it takes everyone
down with me. But at least I don't have to
go down alone.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
But you look to your life, look to your right,
and you go like, eh, sorry.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Do you really have old school cute cards like from
back in the day? Not a teleprompter written because the
show is it was it's a steampunk show.
Speaker 4 (04:28):
It's a steampunk show.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
They used technology from like fifty years ago.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Commits to the pavement it's literally.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
What what does that mean? Hooves to the pavement.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
We're going, Who's to the pavement? Locomotive style?
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Hooves to the pavement is crazy.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
Boots to the cobblestone steampunk.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Okay, that's how we're going We're going wrong old school.
There's somebody that writes the.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
Because everything changes last minute, Like you could be changing
in Joe.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
Changing were they changing last minute for who? Once that
changed that last minute?
Speaker 4 (05:04):
Well, it could literally be like we literally because it's
like live television, it could be like, oh, we literally
have to end the show in five minutes, which means
that you have to take thirty seconds out of your sketch.
So you're there doing like like Jigsaw puzzle, figuring out,
cutting shit out, how to like condense sketches because you're
like have to some some There was a really popular
(05:25):
sketch this season called Lisa from Temecula that, like Chay
wrote on that like blew up when exploded, went totally
viral and it's really funny. And they were live editing
that sketch while it was happening. No, yes, so like
were changing. Yes?
Speaker 1 (05:43):
Why make it so stressful? Who? What is the point
of that stretch? Who is that for?
Speaker 4 (05:51):
It's like me terror?
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Why it doesn't need to be live either, just pre
film it? Why selling something like as live It's like
that's Stephen Funk too, Like it's live, baby, Like, so
sports need to be live nothing else.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
People do watch us, and I like at sports, like
they'll be like Sarah Sherman's having a flop of a season.
I've been looking at her stats. She's in four schedule,
you know.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
But that's not healthy. But there's no point to that stress.
Just filming, filming the day before filming Friday, guess, and
then you have your Saturday off.
Speaker 5 (06:27):
Look what's happening, Look, what's happening. What's happening? Look like
I'm Eric Andre I'm gonna tict it to my phone.
I'm adicted to Instagram. I'm gonna take it to TikTok.
I go guess what. How about I take you back
to the good old days of real live razzle, dazzle lights.
Speaker 4 (06:40):
Can't action show business, Honey, this is showbiz. This isn't TikTok.
Watch me make a sandwich in my dirty kitchen. This
is Hollywood.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
You wouldn't have to be rewriting the thing thirty seconds
into the thing. You can film Friday, then Saturday you
have your whole week en off. You can go for
a little walk.
Speaker 4 (07:01):
Sleep and think a lot of it's good. It's because
it's like, guess what when you're it's live, I have
to rewrite everything. Guess what. Guess what you're not doing
thinking about how miserable your stupid little life.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
That's okay. So you like the pressure of it. You
like woholism.
Speaker 4 (07:16):
There was I had. So I get really nervous and
sometimes I like literally have to project out puke like
seconds before going on.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Really, yes, I was like that. I think I would
be addicted to like Xanax and Booze if I worked
on that show, because it seems like unbelievable.
Speaker 4 (07:32):
Famously that happens most people are, well, it's not really,
and actually it's not. The vibes at SNL right now
are not drugs, which is interesting. If coffee is a drug,
me a drug famously, But I what I am addicted to.
The drug that I am addicted to from SNL is
(07:52):
zofran Caroin. It's like it like literally magically stops you
from puking because I get nervous and.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
I'm like, have you really vomited fully before? You're not
hyper well because you seem very brave. You don't seem
ever nervous when I see you perform.
Speaker 4 (08:15):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 1 (08:15):
I've never seen you get nervous before performance.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
You actually are the person who called me out for
my cope with nerves. On stages, I will have like
laughter dysmorphia, and like literally people will be hooting and
hollering and I won't hear it body, And so then
I'll start doing the thing on stage rum like why
aren't you guys laughing at thiszy fucking idiots? And then
(08:38):
you literally, after what I was opening for you on tour,
you were like, dude, stop saying you're bombing when you're
not bombing.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
You're like, people do that.
Speaker 4 (08:46):
You're like, why are you giving people?
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Don't? Yeah, because then it sex people out, sexy people
out that are laughing. They're like, is she bombing? I
was enjoying the ride, but now she's saying she's bombing
it just like unnecessarily hypnotizes them and wrong direction, I think.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
And I liked what you said. I can't remember exactly
what you said because I don't care. You said something interesting.
You were like, don't for one second let people think
that you're not confident. Why would you do that? You're confident?
You believe in yourself. Why are you even giving them?
Speaker 6 (09:17):
Like?
Speaker 4 (09:18):
It was like amazing. And then the whole rest of
the tour, I was being good.
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Shit, I was talking. I was just talking.
Speaker 4 (09:25):
You're talking, you were on stage, or your dick tuck
between your legs. But this drug that stops you from puking.
So I had to puke really badly. And I was
doing a sketch with Pedro Pascal where like everyone, who
(09:47):
was he.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
So famous all of a sudden because I thought he
was amazing in Narcos. Oh he's got a new.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
Show, I guess, Oh, the Mushroom Show.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
But the show is anti mushroom.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
Somebody told me, oh, because the evil guys are mushrooms.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
I haven't watched it, to be honest, okay, but very attractive.
Speaker 4 (10:00):
He's very hot, and I think everybody's like, I think
he's popping off right now because everyone's like, wait a minute,
he's been slaying this whole time, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
People are catching up right.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
As opposed to people. You know, everyone always knows that
Eric Andre slays everybody. That's true, everybody and no one's
everybody's always saying Eric slays. Eric slayze is.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
I don't know if that's true, but I'll take it.
I will take it. Now, tell me more about bombing.
Speaker 4 (10:28):
Well, in the whole I'm telling you this, So in
the sketch that I have to do with Pedro Pascal, yeah,
the whole time, people are saying crazy stuff to me,
and the whole sketch, all I do is go like hey,
and I'm like reacting with my mouth open like this,
like yeah or whatever. And then right before the sketch,
I really had to peek my brains out, but I couldn't,
(10:49):
so I took a zofran but it wasn't like the chewable,
fast acting kind. So I was like, fuck, I have
to make this happen now, oh God, And so I
chewed up this like supposed to be. It was so disgusting.
It was like, you know, you're supposed to swallow or whatever,
and it turned my tongue pure white, and the whole
sketch I'm supposed to be with my mouth open like
(11:10):
so I was like, well, I have to dye my
tongue so that I ate a bunch of candy. But
I had a puke. So I'm like downing gummy bears
like right, before you go on stage. And if you
watch the sketch, my mouth is open the whole time,
like and my tongue is like bright orange. Some like
a bright orange song. These are this is. I actually
told this story to Hamilton Morris the other night and
(11:33):
he laughed that was my.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Bomb inside I need to laugh.
Speaker 4 (11:39):
So does that counts a social bomb?
Speaker 1 (11:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (11:42):
Oh yeah, I mean I have so many bombing This
wasn't bombing kind of but I was opening for Sandler
at those like Giants.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
I can't imagine.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Have you done a fifteen thousand person arena?
Speaker 1 (11:54):
No I don't. I'm trying to think, well, I have
done fat like I did Coachella and some and like
Beach Goth Festival and I did like.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
But those are outside right.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Yeah so far. I did like Eric Andre Show live,
but I've never done like at Coachella. I just played
the thereman with a dildo for Mac DeMarco for a
not stand up Beach God. I started trying to do
stand up and like the crowd was like, I'm fifty
five different drugs. So I just started like I don't
remember what, just crowd work and just screaming, and then
I just got out of there, and then the other
(12:29):
one was Eric. I never like had to do like
half an hour or whatever for like that many. That
sounds that sounds insane. It doesn't sound like, it doesn't
sound possible, like it's like comedy, like it's impossible.
Speaker 4 (12:44):
It's it's the out outdoors that just reminded me of
another fucking bombing storry. Jesus Christ, how many I have,
like hundreds of bombs.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
It's everybody does.
Speaker 4 (12:55):
The outside one is just like comedy outside you're little,
You're dealing with Oh I'm getting heckled by the sun. Awesome, Yeah,
the God's greatest power, the sun.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:07):
I opened for do you know that band Black MIDI.
They're awesome, They're They're literally I begged to open for them.
They're like my favorite band. It was Central Park summer
stage last year, ninety five degrees out, pure, pure, blinding
son and they have a very young like fan base,
(13:29):
and it was like all ages and I'm like showing
my poopy butthole videos and I'm like, oh, these sixteen
year olds will need to see these poopy buttholes. And
I'm like feeling that a bomb. It was a bomb,
and then apparent and then my friend sent me a
Reddit thread. They said, yo, check this out lol, and
sent me a Reddit thread that was like a video
(13:50):
of my set at Summer Stage again ninety five degree
he pure blazing sun. So I'm being like, Sarah, squirm,
kill yourself, you.
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Sung, Why would your friends send that to you?
Speaker 4 (14:01):
Like literally send it to me, like l O L.
People always be doing right.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Yeah. I think people think it's like, oh, yeah, you're
gonna be great.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
But you have where people are are like you, you're crazy.
You're gonna like this crazy thing someone said about you.
And then some you know, someone sends me a YouTube
comment that's like serious, squirm, I'm gonna come in your
mouth till you explode or something. It's like, I don't
want to.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
See that to you. That's fun.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
But the outside is one thing. It's like, forget about it.
But like the inside stadium shows are like because so
much of my stand up is just like I'm screaming
in repetition, like and it's like absurdist noises, so it's
like it echoes like off the dome. So I get
And then I was getting all confused because I would
(14:50):
just hear myself back at me and i'd be like,
oh no, I want to. But it's really it is
fun because you're like, oh my god, this is like
a once in a lifetime opportunity. I can imagine it's fun.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
I don't think I've done a show like a fifth
of that big that's like for like the super Bowl, right.
Speaker 4 (15:08):
Yes, well, so, so I opened for Sandler in Kansas
City the day before the super Bowl. But I guess
the Kansas City team, Oh.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
God, Kansas City bugles.
Speaker 4 (15:22):
The bugles were not the super Bowl wasn't in Kansas City,
somewhere else, but like everybody showed up to Sandler show,
like in the.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
Bugle and the Chiefs in the gear, in the Chiefs gear.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
And so I was like, oh, it's super Bowl weekend.
I'll do like my big super Bowl joke or whatever
that was. I literally think I said, like, the super
Bowl is this weekend, honey. The only super Bowl I
care about is like the giant toilet Bowl. I'm gonna
need to accomminate all the liquid shit I have spewing
(15:53):
out of my tiny little Jewish asshole from all the
fucking Kansas City barbecue, like a full joke or like
the super Bowl, I need a super Bowl that's super
big enough. Well, my, the diarrhea coming out of as
or whatever.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, and so so irony is not for the like
ironic like a joke that's this is what I have
to learn over twenty years hard way. The joke that's
funny because it's ironically bad is not for the masses.
Speaker 4 (16:24):
And I kind of lost track with that too.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Probably funny me too, like literally like that's for the
for the because there's no like there's the irony doesn't translate,
especially when.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
It's when you're in a room that big. It's just
set up punchline, get in, get out. Yeah, you just
it's so massive that the sound has to be simple.
The ideas shouldn't be that complicated. The rhythm has to
be smooth. And it's like, I'm just I was just
beefing it. And so I said the super Bowl joke,
and then the entire higher fifteen thousand people start going
(17:02):
like I thought it was booing because it sounded like boo,
but it's so I was like, I'm like Bobby for
fucking Adams, like the goat or whatever, but it's their
Their chant is cheeve. So I said, I was like
(17:23):
sober I'll got my big Jewish as Harry ass diarrhea,
and then I just hear boo and I'm likely they
were saying, jeez, that is confusing.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
It's a strange thing.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
But he like, literally whatever, it's gonna sound like I'm
kissing kissing his ants over here. But it's like he
tears in the giant stadiums. He rips it out and
he's a rock star. Yeah, he's got the guitar music.
He puts on like a show and it's really fun.
You're like, it's awesome to be in a room that big,
and you're like, oh my god, all these people love
(17:58):
Billy Madison.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
That's not gonna azic, it's fucking amazing. It's amazing. What
did he ever do a Billy Madison too? Why did
he never do two's? He never does sequels.
Speaker 4 (18:08):
Because he's like got new ideas everything.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Why is it always like a one er?
Speaker 4 (18:11):
Are you? Are you a sequel?
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Am I a sequel?
Speaker 4 (18:14):
Are you missed a sequel?
Speaker 1 (18:15):
I don't have that guy's career. I'm making three hundred
bucks a week over an adult swim factory.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
Well, I think like he just like has like one
hundred new ideas a day, Like even when I was.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
Madison's So Good, Billy Madison, Happy Go More my two
favorite ones.
Speaker 4 (18:34):
When I was opening for him, I did like two
nights in a row. And his show he does, He'll
do two hours fully and there will be they will
be different hours. It's crazy. He has new ships.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Con took me seventeen years to write forty five minutes for.
Speaker 4 (18:49):
I have a good ten minutes. I've been doing sand
for ten years. I have ten minutes solid. I know.
That's why it's like I wish.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I think when you're like rich, like because what do
you gotta worry about? But I'm like, you have special
doctors playing like blood special bloods inside you and stuff
like that. Oh so you can just like go, so
you could just do like four new hours a day.
Speaker 4 (19:10):
I'm not talking about Adam Sandler with this one, but
there are people who've gotten a little too rich and
their comedy has gotten.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
Oh yeah, not good, very well.
Speaker 4 (19:19):
The jokes have evaporated into thin air. Yes, they've gotten
a little too comfortable.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I've seen some very famous people's specials, like recent specials.
A couple there was no jokes. It was like what
what am I? What is this.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
It's like I'm the queen of not having jokes, so
like I'm one to talk. But it's like we got
it's good.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
We gotta be.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Having a job well. And it's like did they tour
this material and it was doing well? Like how did
they get to this material? The materials?
Speaker 4 (19:57):
Well? What they're just so famous that people go googoo gaga,
But it doesn't matter.
Speaker 6 (20:06):
With Aricodre. With Aricdre, all right, tell me more about bombing.
Speaker 4 (20:20):
You're like you burnt through all your bombing stories already here.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
No, No, that's great. I'm glad that you can't.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
Prepared well because I'm like, obviously bombing is so painful,
but I've done it literally every single day in my life.
So I'm like, but I've never actually sat your you
having to come on this podcast, I like actually had
to like literally develop consciousness around all my bombs and failures,
which is interesting. Like I was like, oh, yeah, this
is a good exercise to like sit down and actually
(20:47):
meditate on all my fucking catastrophic Like I've bombed so
hard that you hear the like like after a bomb
in a movie, when you just hear the like like
like like your and everything's in slow motion.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
Oh.
Speaker 4 (21:07):
One time I was like I was in well because
I came up in.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
The Midwest, Chicago.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Baby angels, what's wasted?
Speaker 1 (21:13):
You have been on stage?
Speaker 7 (21:15):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (21:15):
I like trash all let on stage.
Speaker 4 (21:18):
I like took. I can't do weed, yeah, ego deash
it makes me freak.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 4 (21:24):
I had like the worst of all the drugs. Literally,
it's it's the most powerful drug known to man.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
It's the most it's the worst. It's a guaranteed bad trip.
Every single time.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
I write that down, Hamilton, I had two weed mints.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Next mints mints could be powerful. You don't have any.
Speaker 4 (21:46):
Blacked out for three days and that like full like googling,
am I having a heart attack for three days? And
so I'm like lock out where I was in a
literally could to sleep for three days, to the point
where I made I didn't have a car. I made
my friends take me to Griffith Park at like midnight,
in the middle of the night so I could run
(22:07):
around in circles to tucker myself out because I was
like so jacked up. I was like wired. So it's like, okay,
just take me to Griffth Park. Well, it was also
just save me to the Griffith Park. I'm gonna run
around circles until I get tuckered down and then I'll
finally be tired after days. And then I was running
around and I heard the coyotes or whatever that's what
(22:27):
they are, right yeah, And I like, they're not gonna.
Speaker 1 (22:32):
They're in park right.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
There, literally, and so I hear them like cackling or whatever,
and I get so wigged out that it's like great
now I was up for three more days. So then
I was like, Okay, how do.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
I do a show? Like?
Speaker 4 (22:49):
How do I come down from this? I'll take xanax,
no problem. But then the xanax weirdly kind of makes
me freaked. It like cracks me out in a weird
way where it makes me anxious. Yeah, And so I
was like.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
I don't believe you.
Speaker 4 (23:05):
It makes me, I think, because I'm like, I'm like zonked,
And then I'm like, what's happened? Why is it? But
it makes then I get like I'm still and then
I'm anxious about how it's making me turn into like
a dufis kind of and so then I'm on like
stand up is so physical? You're like you're reacting in
(23:27):
the moment to how an audience has reacted to you,
so your reflexes have to be on. And I'm literally like.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
You were on a weed min no sleep, and then
you took a xanax. Then you went on and I
was like, a show in that stand, why don't you
just can't because I'm addicted? What show this?
Speaker 4 (23:48):
It was like at the satellite or whatever. And I
was like like not and like someone was like, there's
like a Netflix exect here, and I was like, and
I think and and I did this bit like a
guided meditation bit thing. But because I was like so
like fried, I was like getting into my own meditation.
(24:09):
I was kind of like losing the plot. Like I
was kind of like didn't do well. No, of course,
not like sweating. I saw pictures of me. There's like
a line are dripping down my face. I can't perform.
I don't get freaked up anymore, but I can't perform
freaked up?
Speaker 1 (24:26):
What is freaked up?
Speaker 4 (24:27):
Man? Cracked out, suited, whacked.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
You're like a nark from the.
Speaker 4 (24:36):
I am weed is bad.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
It's the worst joke. It's the worst joke I've ever done.
Speaker 4 (24:41):
Lock her up.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
We Lady Jane. All right, so you you came. You
started in the Midwest.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
So I've had like you know, like me, I like
me getting on stage and being like I did a
show in Ohio once, like in this island and that's
like like literally in the middle of Lake Erie that
you have to take a ferry together. It's cool, it's
like it's a party island. It's awful, like parrot heads.
(25:10):
But he's like a sunburnt like Hawaiian shirt. And I
was like, I'm Jewish and someone went Schwitz and I
was like, I was literally like again I didn't have
a good comeback.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Bro's crazy for somebody.
Speaker 4 (25:31):
I'm Jewish Schwitz and I think I was like, yeah,
very good. That's like a lot of my bombs just
like like not handling like I wish I had like
a like like that's all those clips that go viral
online right now. It's like epic stand up comedian like
totally destroyed one heckler dot dot speechless. He did a
(25:55):
total fatality do this dot dot dot Heckler that just
reminded me of another bomb. One time, my first paid
stand up gig, I had a joke that was like
it was like about pubes or something, and there was
like a rhetorical question set up that was like why
do you want women to be hairless? Like so you
(26:17):
could oil them up and send send them down a
toboggan shoot or something like that was a joke, not funny,
It's okay, it's okay, it was it was really it
was like why do you want a hairless woman? So
you could oil him up and send them down a
toboggan shoot or something like that. But the rhetorical question
is like why do you want a hairless woman? Or something?
And like an old Irish guy who was like at
an Irish pub literally six people in the audience or
(26:38):
something like that. He was like, I was like, why
do you want a hairless woman? He goes cause it
feels good again? No comeback, no comeback. I was like, awesome,
What am I supposed to say? Like, I'm like, all
I have is like, okay, you're a pedophile.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Like I don't know what it's you should have just
like vibed out with them.
Speaker 8 (27:00):
Report with Aridre. With Aridre, what's the worst bob You've
ever seen? That you were at a part that you
just saw somebody going through.
Speaker 4 (27:21):
Some ship like I don't want to name. I'm like
trying to like.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
You can you can you can protect the innocent, you
say you can call them mister and missus A or
B or something.
Speaker 4 (27:29):
Well, I hosted an open mic in Chicago. Three years
I hosted Cole's open mic. Shout out. My first comedy
job ever Coleman Bryce. Yes, he the legend paid me.
That was my first comedy job was hosting an open
mic at Cole's Bar and awesome. Me and Rebecca O'Neil
(27:50):
hosted it. And we would put up like fifty comics
a night. So it's like, honey, what I have want
I've seen?
Speaker 1 (27:54):
Do you remember a specific Uh, well.
Speaker 4 (27:56):
There was a guy tweaked out on drugs who wouldn't
get off the stage, and he was screaming that's cool,
and so we had to like physically we had a physic.
We had to literally I had to like call the
bar guys like physically remove them. So I was like, bro,
we got to get through fifty comics and you're on
stage for longer than four minutes and I'm gonna have
to physically move you from the stage. And he was
(28:17):
like to weeaking and then like one time, oh, there
was this guy there's because we would get weirdos. There
was an open mic, and I like, all my ship like,
I'm just like such, you know, I'm not good at
I'm not good at stand all. My jokes are about
being Jewish whatever. So this one you're supposed to say,
(28:37):
you're amazing tucker herself up. But I had like a
lot of jokes about being Jewish. And this guy gets
up and he was like, he was like, I don't
mind the Jewish. I'd suck and and all that longe
like I'd do something, you know, he was like, And
I was like, you don't mind that I'm Jewish. You'd
(28:57):
suck on it all my or something like that. And
he was like, I'd let you do what I read.
I'd go freak mode on it. He said, sougn crazy.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
And everyone was like, you're Jewish, already off to the races, already,
shaky star. I suck it all that.
Speaker 4 (29:19):
I can't remember what what he said, something really good,
but he went in like graphic detail about what it
would be like to have sex.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
With me and stand up. That was bit.
Speaker 4 (29:31):
That was his bit, and well he was he was
a little bit of a one of the town characters.
So honestly, it didn't really bomb that bad, but he
was like in graphic Also, I can't remember if this
is a characters. He's one of the town characters. And
he was. I don't want to say one of his
jokes on the podcast because it's like he on the pod,
(29:53):
because because it's like I want him to have credit
for this joke, and I don't want to just like
say a joke out of turn that I.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
Don't it doesn't matter, just say it is a guy
still doing stand up. I don't think he is well.
Speaker 4 (30:05):
He he used to he I guess was.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
In that man's name Tom Sigur.
Speaker 4 (30:13):
Like in my memory, he had a joke that was
like a riff on like what is it? What is it?
Puff puff pass? But he was like in prison and
he didn't have any teeth, and so he talked about
being in prison and doing a slurp slurp pass blow
drops again and so but it's like, again, this is
(30:35):
not my joke, and I want all credit to him.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Yeah, but it.
Speaker 4 (30:40):
Was like he said, and he would say that.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
He sounds cool.
Speaker 4 (30:44):
Let up, I let go up. After he literally went
on stage was like, I hate Jews, but I fres
got you crazy.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
I was like, all right into it. You were like.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
He did.
Speaker 7 (31:09):
He had two words, my husband, that is how Literally
the the Detroit Bomb, This is really good trouble.
Speaker 4 (31:27):
Is it already done? Bored?
Speaker 1 (31:31):
We keep going.
Speaker 4 (31:33):
This is a good one. So it was like the
punk house in Detroit. We were doing a d Y
touring and we were doing like we were like playing
with a bunch of noise people. We were doing like
d I y houses, so Troumble Flex. The floor was
dirt and it was like all crusties, so it was
like more dogs there than people. And literally, my friend
(31:54):
Ruby McAllister best median the planet, was heckled by a
candle a guy who was like tweeked out on crazy drugs.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
This is a drug, that's what you call them. A candle.
Speaker 4 (32:07):
He was tweeked down on crazy drugs and he had
a like candlelabra candle lit and he just like walked
up to the stage like right against the lip of
the stage and just held a candle, a lit candle,
held a lit candle just like in her face. And
she was like, oh, I'm literally getting heckled by a
candle and we all just like fucking bombed. And then
(32:30):
there was like the whole show. There was a guy
in the back of the venue scribbling on the wall
with grayons. And then there was a Jugglo in the
back of the house the whole time, sitting there silently
in full Jugglo makeup. And his name was Freshness. Shout
out the freshness of the juggler in the droit. He
came correct.
Speaker 7 (32:48):
He had a sequin Fedora full jug whoa.
Speaker 4 (32:54):
Fling shirt with like like magic eight balls on it
that flames, and he brought little picture of me. He
drew a picture.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Oh he was like your first fan, first fan. Yeah,
that's sick.
Speaker 4 (33:05):
He drew a picture. Thank you, Sarah for bringing your
Chicago comedy to Oh.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
So he was like a sweetie, Pat, He's a sweetie.
Speaker 4 (33:14):
But he saw the bomb.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
Can the candle?
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Can you how threatening fire?
Speaker 1 (33:23):
Well? This is hell chop this hell chop, this is
the hell This is the hell tap tour that you
talked about.
Speaker 6 (33:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (33:28):
Yeah, I went on tour with the show called hell
Trap Nightmare. And of course if you're going to do
a show called hell Drop Nightmare, you are going to
be inviting hell trap nightmare?
Speaker 1 (33:39):
What was that door?
Speaker 6 (33:39):
Like?
Speaker 4 (33:40):
Well awesome? We were like sleeping in the bathtub, literally
like waking up everybodd bed bugs. We would like do
shows in like people's living rooms and then be like, hey,
do you guys have a microphone? They'd be like no,
like sleeping.
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Rust punk Squatter was like squatter literally squatters right, it's
the Squatters.
Speaker 4 (34:01):
Right, And I was like doing my I would be like,
so I'm Jewish?
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Were you guys eating like bread sandwiches?
Speaker 4 (34:08):
We would like literally e mcdonald' every morning and then
be like, why do we feel sick? Any bugles? Wah wah?
Get an ice coffee froma wah?
Speaker 1 (34:18):
No nutrients in your body.
Speaker 4 (34:19):
The whole tour, the whole tour we would do like
it was I mean it was legitimately awesome because we'd
be like we do like a show in Pittsburgh with
these performance artists who literally played a scarf as an instrument.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
It was were we going to go see the Residents
fifty year anniversary?
Speaker 4 (34:35):
And no pasted already it was in Manhattan, but we
were going to go. I literally texted you I got
his tickets, but then I have works We couldn't go.
But you weren't even in town. It wasn't but.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Oh yeah, we'll wait for their seventy of the university.
Speaker 4 (34:53):
We missed it.
Speaker 1 (34:54):
Oh man, you gotte me to stuff. Man, I don't know.
I was sitting in my apartment. I stare at the wall.
Speaker 4 (35:01):
I buy it. Literally every single time I do anything,
I buy one ticket for me, one ticket for Dan,
one ticket for then I get. Every day you're like,
I'm at the next game.
Speaker 1 (35:11):
I go, thanks for I've been to two Knicks games.
Speaker 4 (35:14):
Every single day. You go, I'm at the next gamp.
Oh I went to Gary Newman without you. That's what
I did.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
Yeah, I'm still upset. I the podcast would be twice
as long if you didn't do that to me. That's
why I'm cutting it short. This is actually the longest episode.
Speaker 4 (35:29):
Because you're like, I'm hungry, my allergies hurt, I gotta
go home. Thanks for coming.
Speaker 1 (35:34):
How do you want to end this?
Speaker 4 (35:35):
I want to think of like a really good bomb
one time. One time I opened up for a metal
band and I really bombed. But I like doing those
shows like Black Mini. Please have me open up for
you again. Even though I talked about how I bombed
opening for you, please seriously, I love you guys, You're
the best man. That was all me when I when
I'm mom well because my bombs are huge, because I
literally show videos of poopy buttholes, and I was like
(35:58):
showing videos a poopy butthole and this all right.
Speaker 1 (36:01):
You already told that story.
Speaker 4 (36:02):
No, it's a new one. I was opening for this
metal band and this guy went fuck you news suck
and everyone's like yeah, yeah. And then the headliner band
that got on, this pump band, meat Wave, who is awesome,
was like to whoever said like they got a stage
and they're like, whoever said, Sarah squirm you suck? Fuck
(36:23):
you Yeah? And then they played cool music.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
That's that's rough. Fuck you.
Speaker 4 (36:32):
You haven't had that.
Speaker 1 (36:34):
Yeah, But I've only open up for bands maybe once
or twice and immediately realized it was bad and like,
never do it. Play played an outdoor played an outdoor festival.
I'd rather be in the perfect environment for stand up
and create a bunch of chaos than be in a
chaotic environment and try to keep up. It's way higher
(36:55):
stakes to go to the laugh factory, yes, or the
comedy store and throw shit all over the stage. And
jump in the audience and be crazy because you're subverting
the convention. If you're already in an environment that's already
punk rock, there's kind of nowhere to go. Sure, So yeah,
I'd rather be like punk rock in the traditional environment.
Speaker 4 (37:21):
And like, I'd rather be a masochist and go into
a no win situation.
Speaker 1 (37:28):
I feel I've been in a million of I've been
in a million of those, but I no longer have
the strength. I can't even do a regular show. I
can't read and I can't do a regular sh I
just a quarantine, like a different I drank so much
(37:49):
in quarantine that I came out.
Speaker 4 (37:50):
You had to read all those cocktail.
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Books, Yeah, there you go. Oh yeah, I would read
through those like crazy. Any other was.
Speaker 4 (37:57):
Reading through a cocktail list ingredient when you get you're
always like asking me, like what am I supposed to
think of, like the conflict in the Middle East, And
I'll send you and I'm like, oh, thanks for the question.
Here's an article. I send you an article you can't
read this reward ass Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:18):
Well, also, I'm on my phone already, so I'm already distracted.
I'm gonna stop down from Instagram to read like some
grueling grim history and Instagram. Yeah, Sarah scrim love yours,
(38:39):
give it up to God, good night, and I'll tell
you where you didn't bomb this podcast with a recon.
All right, listen up, we got some special for you.
Speaker 9 (38:54):
Got a burning story that you're itching to tell about
when you bombed or absolutely failed in life. Now's your
chance to tell me all about it, Babe. I want
to hear your worst, most cringe worthy what the fuck
was I thinking?
Speaker 1 (39:07):
What just happened? Moment?
Speaker 9 (39:08):
So pick up your phone and dial seven one six
Bombing at seven one six two six six twenty four
sixty four and leave me a voicemail and we might.
Speaker 1 (39:18):
Just play it on a future episode.
Speaker 9 (39:20):
Bombing with Eric Andre is brought to you by Will
Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcast. Our executive
producer is Olivia Aguilar, Our producer is Bei Wang, Our
research assistant is David Carliner, our editor in sound designers
Andy Harris, and our art is by Dylan Vanderberg. Go
rate us five stars and drop a review on your
podcast app a choice
Host
Eric Andre
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