July 3, 2024 • 7 mins
Tinder is fun, but the dates don’t always work out, and can sometimes be really… really bad. Two of our listeners battle HEAD-to-HEAD to see who has the most tragic dating life!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Two hopeless das one dating app then dares you.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Guys, swipe right.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
The question is.
Speaker 4 (00:07):
Whose love life is more tragic.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
It's Battle Love the Tender Dates. It's the dating game
show that's sold out of Vibrating pens. Apparently they were
all sent to a B Foxes.
Speaker 5 (00:24):
I don't think it's gotta find some way to smile.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
I guess it's better than vibrating forks. It's where two
of our listeners go head to head to find out
whose dating life is the most tragic. We'll explain the
rules in just a second. First, let's meet today's contestants.
In this corner, he spent hours watching National Geographic so
he could perfectly imitate the mating call of an African
honey badger Wow. That's why the ladies know him as
(00:51):
orin warrin.
Speaker 4 (00:52):
Wow Hello, Hello honey badger high.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
And in the other corner, he says there's only one
musical group that he trusts to put on his bedroom playlist,
and they set the mood every time. Meet Bone Thug
does meet you at the crossroads.
Speaker 5 (01:13):
Hey, guys, one contestant is gonna start by telling one
of their worst dating stories, and then the other will
try and counter with the nightmare story of their own.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
We're going back and forth for three rounds till we
declare a winner. We're gonna start things off with orin Warren.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Okay, let's go. Okay. So this date was in a
jiu jitsu class day.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
Is that something you and her did already?
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Well, she definitely had.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
We hadn't done it together, and I'm not a big
jiu jitsu guy.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
All right, Okay, how'd that go?
Speaker 2 (01:46):
It was a little intimidated at first, Like she's a
brown belt and so that was interesting.
Speaker 5 (01:51):
So she just beat you up.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Well, I'm bigger than her, and so like she kept
yelling like attack me, attack me.
Speaker 5 (02:00):
You guys think I'm aggressive on the first day.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
You haven't said that on a first day, So what
would you do.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
I wasn't doing anything at first. They didn't want to
hurt her.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
And then her teacher or her sense or whatever, he
started calling me like a coward and things like that.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Hello, they do that. I think that's the way of
martial arts.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
What did you do?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Basically, I went for it.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I closed my eyes and I hit her and I
pumped her in the throat.
Speaker 5 (02:28):
I don't think that's what you're supposed to do.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Man, I'm supposed to defend it.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
You're a black belt.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
You didn't even know it.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
Yeah, it was to say that the date was over
when the ambulance came.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
You didn't kiss her after that?
Speaker 5 (02:40):
Oh, the ambulance had to get called.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
From zero to one hundred. We're going over to Doug.
I popped a vocal cord, Doug, can you hit back?
No pun intendant?
Speaker 2 (02:53):
All right.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
So I'm having a chill night with a girl in
my apartment and we ordered some Uber eat. So the
driver gets there, she goes to the door and she
started flirting with him. So at first I said, you know,
maybe she'd just be a nice but then she invites
him in to hang out. Its getting weird. Did he
(03:15):
come in? Yeah, and he was a better looking guy
than I am. They end up sitting on the couch
talking together all night. I ended up being the third
wheel in my own plate and he ate my fries.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
That was probably all after you added the tip to
four star rating on that around two Warren, What do
you got?
Speaker 1 (03:41):
So my date shows up to the restaurants and I
know she had like a file folder with her. No
big deal, I thought, she had just had papers.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
From work or something like that. No, it was a
bit more shocking than that. She proceeds to pull out all.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
This background in for me, me and basically grilled me
about some things.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
And she said she needs to ask me a bunch
of questions.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Oh my god, Alexis, you went out with Warren.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
She just keeps it in her hand.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
My car, you got a counter. So this one girl
btes me over and when I get there, I see
that she made those dinosaur chicken nuggets.
Speaker 5 (04:26):
Also, as with Alexis.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
You know, I'm not a snob. I thought that was fine,
but then she took my shirt off and she put
ketchup on me and started pretending that the dinosaurs were
eating me.
Speaker 5 (04:45):
I'm fell into a geyser.
Speaker 4 (04:47):
It's my belly button.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
We could call the game right there, but we got
to go on the round three, Roaring Warren, last chance,
let's go.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
So I'm on another's dinner date and everything's going fine,
and then she gets up to go to the restroom,
and then I noticed my phone was gone, So I'm
looking everywhere for it, dead drop it and she comes
back and now.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
My phone's back, and so.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
I'm thinking that maybe she transferred some money or some
money on my accounts or something like that.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
That is kind of a classic move lately.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
Did she No?
Speaker 1 (05:25):
It turns out she actually unfollowed every girl on my
Instagram and changed my on screen to like my junk pick.
Speaker 5 (05:33):
Whoa to see yourself?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Jokes on you guys, I married her? Oh wait?
Speaker 3 (05:47):
What what the heck?
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Someone put there for everyone but phones Doug, Doug, this
is the last shot, let's hear it.
Speaker 4 (05:55):
So i'magine for the girl. We're both in the cars,
she tells me on the date, I want to show
what I'm working on. So I met her outside this
junk yard, and I'm expecting to see, you know, like
a classic like a Mustang or you know, charges, But
she has this old Honda accord. If he tells me
we're gonna play a game, we could climb over the
(06:15):
gate first and steal the most parts that she needs.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Yeah, she literally just needs someone to help her with
a heavy car.
Speaker 5 (06:25):
It's not her accord either.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Who won that? Yeah, there's the final bell that means
the match is over. We need to score this. So judges, alexis,
who are you gonna give it to?
Speaker 1 (06:39):
I'm gonna go Doug having the third wheel in his
own house.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Brook Dude, For sure, Doug, I was going with the
car theft girl. Congratulations bone Thug Doug of the Week.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Yeah, I'm not sure I want to win, but thank you.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
Nora doesn't count.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
He married one of his bad dates.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
That's his prise. Congratulations Saul. That's Battle of the Tender Dates.
We got phone tap coming up next.
Two hopeless das one dating app then dares you.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Guys, swipe right.
Speaker 3 (00:06):
The question is.
Speaker 4 (00:07):
Whose love life is more tragic.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
It's Battle Love the Tender Dates. It's the dating game
show that's sold out of Vibrating pens. Apparently they were
all sent to a B Foxes.
Speaker 5 (00:24):
I don't think it's gotta find some way to smile.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
I guess it's better than vibrating forks. It's where two
of our listeners go head to head to find out
whose dating life is the most tragic. We'll explain the
rules in just a second. First, let's meet today's contestants.
In this corner, he spent hours watching National Geographic so
he could perfectly imitate the mating call of an African
honey badger Wow. That's why the ladies know him as
(00:51):
orin warrin.
Speaker 4 (00:52):
Wow Hello, Hello honey badger high.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
And in the other corner, he says there's only one
musical group that he trusts to put on his bedroom playlist,
and they set the mood every time. Meet Bone Thug
does meet you at the crossroads.
Speaker 5 (01:13):
Hey, guys, one contestant is gonna start by telling one
of their worst dating stories, and then the other will
try and counter with the nightmare story of their own.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
We're going back and forth for three rounds till we
declare a winner. We're gonna start things off with orin Warren.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Okay, let's go. Okay. So this date was in a
jiu jitsu class day.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
Is that something you and her did already?
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Well, she definitely had.
Speaker 1 (01:41):
We hadn't done it together, and I'm not a big
jiu jitsu guy.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
All right, Okay, how'd that go?
Speaker 2 (01:46):
It was a little intimidated at first, Like she's a
brown belt and so that was interesting.
Speaker 5 (01:51):
So she just beat you up.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Well, I'm bigger than her, and so like she kept
yelling like attack me, attack me.
Speaker 5 (02:00):
You guys think I'm aggressive on the first day.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
You haven't said that on a first day, So what
would you do.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
I wasn't doing anything at first. They didn't want to
hurt her.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
And then her teacher or her sense or whatever, he
started calling me like a coward and things like that.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Hello, they do that. I think that's the way of
martial arts.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
What did you do?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Basically, I went for it.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I closed my eyes and I hit her and I
pumped her in the throat.
Speaker 5 (02:28):
I don't think that's what you're supposed to do.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Man, I'm supposed to defend it.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
You're a black belt.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
You didn't even know it.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
Yeah, it was to say that the date was over
when the ambulance came.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
You didn't kiss her after that?
Speaker 5 (02:40):
Oh, the ambulance had to get called.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
From zero to one hundred. We're going over to Doug.
I popped a vocal cord, Doug, can you hit back?
No pun intendant?
Speaker 2 (02:53):
All right.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
So I'm having a chill night with a girl in
my apartment and we ordered some Uber eat. So the
driver gets there, she goes to the door and she
started flirting with him. So at first I said, you know,
maybe she'd just be a nice but then she invites
him in to hang out. Its getting weird. Did he
(03:15):
come in? Yeah, and he was a better looking guy
than I am. They end up sitting on the couch
talking together all night. I ended up being the third
wheel in my own plate and he ate my fries.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
That was probably all after you added the tip to
four star rating on that around two Warren, What do
you got?
Speaker 1 (03:41):
So my date shows up to the restaurants and I
know she had like a file folder with her. No
big deal, I thought, she had just had papers.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
From work or something like that. No, it was a
bit more shocking than that. She proceeds to pull out all.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
This background in for me, me and basically grilled me
about some things.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
And she said she needs to ask me a bunch
of questions.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Oh my god, Alexis, you went out with Warren.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
She just keeps it in her hand.
Speaker 4 (04:15):
My car, you got a counter. So this one girl
btes me over and when I get there, I see
that she made those dinosaur chicken nuggets.
Speaker 5 (04:26):
Also, as with Alexis.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
You know, I'm not a snob. I thought that was fine,
but then she took my shirt off and she put
ketchup on me and started pretending that the dinosaurs were
eating me.
Speaker 5 (04:45):
I'm fell into a geyser.
Speaker 4 (04:47):
It's my belly button.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
We could call the game right there, but we got
to go on the round three, Roaring Warren, last chance,
let's go.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
So I'm on another's dinner date and everything's going fine,
and then she gets up to go to the restroom,
and then I noticed my phone was gone, So I'm
looking everywhere for it, dead drop it and she comes
back and now.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
My phone's back, and so.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
I'm thinking that maybe she transferred some money or some
money on my accounts or something like that.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
That is kind of a classic move lately.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
Did she No?
Speaker 1 (05:25):
It turns out she actually unfollowed every girl on my
Instagram and changed my on screen to like my junk pick.
Speaker 5 (05:33):
Whoa to see yourself?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Jokes on you guys, I married her? Oh wait?
Speaker 3 (05:47):
What what the heck?
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (05:50):
Someone put there for everyone but phones Doug, Doug, this
is the last shot, let's hear it.
Speaker 4 (05:55):
So i'magine for the girl. We're both in the cars,
she tells me on the date, I want to show
what I'm working on. So I met her outside this
junk yard, and I'm expecting to see, you know, like
a classic like a Mustang or you know, charges, But
she has this old Honda accord. If he tells me
we're gonna play a game, we could climb over the
(06:15):
gate first and steal the most parts that she needs.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
Yeah, she literally just needs someone to help her with
a heavy car.
Speaker 5 (06:25):
It's not her accord either.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Who won that? Yeah, there's the final bell that means
the match is over. We need to score this. So judges, alexis,
who are you gonna give it to?
Speaker 1 (06:39):
I'm gonna go Doug having the third wheel in his
own house.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
Brook Dude, For sure, Doug, I was going with the
car theft girl. Congratulations bone Thug Doug of the Week.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
Yeah, I'm not sure I want to win, but thank you.
Speaker 5 (06:56):
Nora doesn't count.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
He married one of his bad dates.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
That's his prise. Congratulations Saul. That's Battle of the Tender Dates.
We got phone tap coming up next.
Hosts And Creators
Brooke Fox
Jeffrey "Young Jeffrey" Dubow
Alexis Fuller
Jose Bolanos
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