April 30, 2025 • 7 mins
Tinder is fun, but the dates don’t always work out, and can sometimes be really… really bad. Two of our listeners battle HEAD-to-HEAD to see who has the most tragic dating life!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Two hopeless daters one dating app, then dares you swipe right.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
The question is.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Whose love life is more tragic.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
It's Battle of the Tinder Dates. It's the dating game
show that just added Hannibal Lecter as his hall passed
who Battle of the Tinder Dates where two of our
listeners go head to head to find out whose dating
life is the most tragic. We'll explain the rules in
just a second, but first let's meet today's contestants. In
this corner, her number one aphrodisiac is eating triple to
(00:35):
recommend a daily dose of potassium, and that's why the
boys call her Banana Joanna.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Oh, I'm glad to put the bandit.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
What is it?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Banana bits clustered.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
And in the other corner, she buys all her sexy
lingerie at the Hudson News in the airport. And that's
why TSA knows her as duty free.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
He's using a charging for it as a g stream.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I know her real secrets. But here's how the game works.
One contestant will start by one of their worst dating stories.
The other will try and counter with a nightmare story
of their own. We're going back and forth for three
rounds until we declare a winner. We're kicking it off
with Banana Joeanna, Let's do it.
Speaker 5 (01:21):
Okay. So I met a guy whose dating profile said
that he rode horses professionally, which to me I thought, okay,
cowboy hot.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Oh really I was thinking like English rider up either way?
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Rich?
Speaker 5 (01:36):
Yeah, that absolutely crossed my mind. He invited me to
watch him, and we go out and I end up
seeing him ride one of those children's mechanical horses at
the mall.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Whoa a bad boy?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
But is he doing tricks and stuff?
Speaker 3 (01:53):
But that's not I mean, he was just trying to
be funny, right, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
You know.
Speaker 5 (01:57):
He tells me that it's a legit sport now for
adult that they have a competition in Germany for whoever
can do it the longest.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
There are some weird stuff that goes down in Germany.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Well, they would literally have competition sports for everything. Seriously,
I wouldn't have let him get away, but.
Speaker 5 (02:14):
Over to you, okay.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
So this guy told me to surprise him for our
first date, which I was cool with. So I pick
him up and I take him to the zoo. Yeah,
except when we got there, he looks really sad and
tells me that we had to go somewhere else. Apparently
he's banned.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
He's banned from I thought he was going to be
sad that the idols were in cages or something.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
How do you get banned from the zoo?
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Well, he didn't go into details, but he did say
it was the giraffe fault.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Oh yeah, actually I believe him. Let's get out of here.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
I see Frederick, so I could google search.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Yeah. I didn't ask any more questions.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
So many in my head.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I don't know if we want to know. We're on
the round two. Joanna tossing it back to you.
Speaker 5 (03:09):
Okay, So I met a guy walking his dog at
the local park and I was there too walking my dog,
so it's kind of natural. We just started walking together.
And once we got back to my place, I tell
him it was, you know, nice to meet him, but
this was my spot, so I got to go, and
he asks if he could check out my backyard to
see how much space I have?
Speaker 2 (03:29):
All right, how much space?
Speaker 3 (03:30):
I mean I would just think it's an excuse to
like be with you longer.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Sure, yeah, but to ask the space thing, that's weird. Well,
it's probably because like they both have dogs and he
wants to know, like how much space for the dogs. God,
I don't have a dog, so I didn't.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Think that way.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
Okay, well that's exactly what I thought. And so we
get back there, and then all of a sudden, he yells,
gotcha and proceeds to tell me that he is in
the hoa and he knew that he hurt a little
fountain that I have in my yard, but he had
to prove it undercover, undercover each way, and he gave
(04:10):
me a huge fine at the end of the day.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Yeah crazy, Yeah you counter.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Okay. So at dinner, I ordered a steak and my
date told me he was vegetarian. Okay, he didn't make
a big deal out of it.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
Yeah. Good.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Only afterwards, when he was driving me home, he pulled
over and stopped the car and started crying. Oh man,
but by a farm where he wanted me to apologize
to the cow and did you absolutely not?
Speaker 3 (04:50):
I mean it would be harder to eat if it
was called cut cow.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
We got to the final round here. We need your
best stories, lady, so Joanna hit us with it.
Speaker 5 (04:59):
Okay. So before our date, this one guy told me
that he might get recognized for being a little famous.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Oh, and I'm.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Kind of intrigued. And then at dinner he tells me why.
And he does this by pulling up a YouTube video
of him falling off a treadmill and completely wiping out.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
Oh.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
It had one hundred and seventy million views.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Seventy million. It's definitely the one I'm thinking of in
my head, Like, there's one guy on YouTube that's just
that's really funny.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
When you're running for our show, don't run that much, runner.
Speaker 5 (05:38):
And ultimately he was right because the waiter did recognize him.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Oh yeah, treadmill family. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (05:45):
Oh my god, I'm going to put your food.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
On the ground because you're gonna end up there anyway.
Here you go, Here we go, duty free, Brie, last Chance.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Okay, I had a date with a guy and it
was so terrible that I ghosted him. But the kicker
is I had met him in the law of my
work and I just thought he was a guest. Turns
out he's the window cleaner for our buildings. So now
I see him every six months and he shows up
looking into my office. Yeah, and he has a homemade
(06:15):
sign that he brings back every time that says text me.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
Back dedicated give him a chance.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
It's the final vow that means the matches over judges.
Let's score this, Alexis.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
So I gotta go.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
Drianna for the h A guy for Joanna.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
I'm the same. I can't get over the h OA.
Gotcha you wish me.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Congratulations Banana, Joanna, you are our lonely Lady of the Week.
And as a prize, Brook will tell you her two
word phrase to seduce any man.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Drake.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Now you know, Joanna, try it at works. Text it
into seventy Jaxson seventy five nine two if you want
up here on the next edition of Battle of the
Tender dates phone taps coming up right after this Brooke
Speaker 3 (07:09):
And Jeffrey in the morning,
Two hopeless daters one dating app, then dares you swipe right.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
The question is.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Whose love life is more tragic.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
It's Battle of the Tinder Dates. It's the dating game
show that just added Hannibal Lecter as his hall passed
who Battle of the Tinder Dates where two of our
listeners go head to head to find out whose dating
life is the most tragic. We'll explain the rules in
just a second, but first let's meet today's contestants. In
this corner, her number one aphrodisiac is eating triple to
(00:35):
recommend a daily dose of potassium, and that's why the
boys call her Banana Joanna.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Oh, I'm glad to put the bandit.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
What is it?
Speaker 3 (00:47):
Banana bits clustered.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
And in the other corner, she buys all her sexy
lingerie at the Hudson News in the airport. And that's
why TSA knows her as duty free.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
He's using a charging for it as a g stream.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
I know her real secrets. But here's how the game works.
One contestant will start by one of their worst dating stories.
The other will try and counter with a nightmare story
of their own. We're going back and forth for three
rounds until we declare a winner. We're kicking it off
with Banana Joeanna, Let's do it.
Speaker 5 (01:21):
Okay. So I met a guy whose dating profile said
that he rode horses professionally, which to me I thought, okay,
cowboy hot.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Oh really I was thinking like English rider up either way?
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Rich?
Speaker 5 (01:36):
Yeah, that absolutely crossed my mind. He invited me to
watch him, and we go out and I end up
seeing him ride one of those children's mechanical horses at
the mall.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Whoa a bad boy?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
But is he doing tricks and stuff?
Speaker 3 (01:53):
But that's not I mean, he was just trying to
be funny, right, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
You know.
Speaker 5 (01:57):
He tells me that it's a legit sport now for
adult that they have a competition in Germany for whoever
can do it the longest.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
There are some weird stuff that goes down in Germany.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Well, they would literally have competition sports for everything. Seriously,
I wouldn't have let him get away, but.
Speaker 5 (02:14):
Over to you, okay.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
So this guy told me to surprise him for our
first date, which I was cool with. So I pick
him up and I take him to the zoo. Yeah,
except when we got there, he looks really sad and
tells me that we had to go somewhere else. Apparently
he's banned.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
He's banned from I thought he was going to be
sad that the idols were in cages or something.
Speaker 2 (02:41):
How do you get banned from the zoo?
Speaker 1 (02:43):
Well, he didn't go into details, but he did say
it was the giraffe fault.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Oh yeah, actually I believe him. Let's get out of here.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
I see Frederick, so I could google search.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Yeah. I didn't ask any more questions.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
So many in my head.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I don't know if we want to know. We're on
the round two. Joanna tossing it back to you.
Speaker 5 (03:09):
Okay, So I met a guy walking his dog at
the local park and I was there too walking my dog,
so it's kind of natural. We just started walking together.
And once we got back to my place, I tell
him it was, you know, nice to meet him, but
this was my spot, so I got to go, and
he asks if he could check out my backyard to
see how much space I have?
Speaker 2 (03:29):
All right, how much space?
Speaker 3 (03:30):
I mean I would just think it's an excuse to
like be with you longer.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Sure, yeah, but to ask the space thing, that's weird. Well,
it's probably because like they both have dogs and he
wants to know, like how much space for the dogs. God,
I don't have a dog, so I didn't.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Think that way.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
Okay, well that's exactly what I thought. And so we
get back there, and then all of a sudden, he yells,
gotcha and proceeds to tell me that he is in
the hoa and he knew that he hurt a little
fountain that I have in my yard, but he had
to prove it undercover, undercover each way, and he gave
(04:10):
me a huge fine at the end of the day.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
Yeah crazy, Yeah you counter.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Okay. So at dinner, I ordered a steak and my
date told me he was vegetarian. Okay, he didn't make
a big deal out of it.
Speaker 5 (04:28):
Yeah. Good.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Only afterwards, when he was driving me home, he pulled
over and stopped the car and started crying. Oh man,
but by a farm where he wanted me to apologize
to the cow and did you absolutely not?
Speaker 3 (04:50):
I mean it would be harder to eat if it
was called cut cow.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
We got to the final round here. We need your
best stories, lady, so Joanna hit us with it.
Speaker 5 (04:59):
Okay. So before our date, this one guy told me
that he might get recognized for being a little famous.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Oh, and I'm.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Kind of intrigued. And then at dinner he tells me why.
And he does this by pulling up a YouTube video
of him falling off a treadmill and completely wiping out.
Speaker 4 (05:22):
Oh.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
It had one hundred and seventy million views.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Seventy million. It's definitely the one I'm thinking of in
my head, Like, there's one guy on YouTube that's just
that's really funny.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
When you're running for our show, don't run that much, runner.
Speaker 5 (05:38):
And ultimately he was right because the waiter did recognize him.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Oh yeah, treadmill family. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (05:45):
Oh my god, I'm going to put your food.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
On the ground because you're gonna end up there anyway.
Here you go, Here we go, duty free, Brie, last Chance.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
Okay, I had a date with a guy and it
was so terrible that I ghosted him. But the kicker
is I had met him in the law of my
work and I just thought he was a guest. Turns
out he's the window cleaner for our buildings. So now
I see him every six months and he shows up
looking into my office. Yeah, and he has a homemade
(06:15):
sign that he brings back every time that says text me.
Speaker 3 (06:19):
Back dedicated give him a chance.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
It's the final vow that means the matches over judges.
Let's score this, Alexis.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
So I gotta go.
Speaker 2 (06:31):
Drianna for the h A guy for Joanna.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
I'm the same. I can't get over the h OA.
Gotcha you wish me.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Congratulations Banana, Joanna, you are our lonely Lady of the Week.
And as a prize, Brook will tell you her two
word phrase to seduce any man.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Drake.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Now you know, Joanna, try it at works. Text it
into seventy Jaxson seventy five nine two if you want
up here on the next edition of Battle of the
Tender dates phone taps coming up right after this Brooke
Speaker 3 (07:09):
And Jeffrey in the morning,
Hosts And Creators
Brooke Fox
Jeffrey "Young Jeffrey" Dubow
Alexis Fuller
Jose Bolanos
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