FULL SHOW: José Lost BIG, Alexis’ Dumbest Sports Moment + 1st Time Tinderer Date (2/19/25)

FULL SHOW: Wednesday, February 19th, 2025

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well, oh, do have a mic?

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Do I sense a lady or a gentleman, it doesn't matter.
I'm want to say you welcome to the phone podcast.
I'm assuming you did when I did, and you just
got off of four hour of how clocked there?

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Mean that's also a hot podcast?

Speaker 3 (00:19):
Okay, we're not gonna do that in this podcast study
at yo.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
Okay, but coming in clomps number second is Brooke and
Jeffrey in podcast and it's a full shol so you
get more than just a couple of minutes.

Speaker 1 (00:28):
That is going to be an extensive an hour.

Speaker 4 (00:30):
It's an hour.

Speaker 2 (00:31):
Yeah, and that's sixty minutes. Okay, So it starts right
now when I say now, okay, okay.

Speaker 1 (00:37):
Now, big sparkly lights, spinning roulette wheels in a pile
of shrimp the size of brooks Kia. Nero, Vegas is
a special place. Yeah, and I know Jose loves to
frequent there all the time. Have you ever been comped
a free meal or a free room because of how

(00:58):
much you've gambled there?

Speaker 5 (01:00):
Because I'm an idiot and I don't sign up for
the rewards things you're not a.

Speaker 4 (01:05):
Member, then they don't know how much.

Speaker 5 (01:07):
But I've lost thousands of dollars they should have.

Speaker 4 (01:09):
Well, they're like, ooh, dude, keep gambling.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
Yeah, crying long Gone are the days of you sitting
at a five dollars blackjack table for a couple hours
expecting the pit boss to come over and give you
a complimentary bar of fancy hotel soap called.

Speaker 3 (01:25):
Seriously, those tables are so expensive on the weekend.

Speaker 1 (01:28):
Real casinos pretty much have a set mark now for
how much you need to spend to be considered a
high roller. And the thing is they won't advertise exactly
what that number is, okay obviously, because then people just
come in and spend exactly that much to get free stuff.

Speaker 3 (01:42):
Is this whole thing to give jose some life goals?

Speaker 4 (01:44):
I'm really no, Seriously, I want to hear that.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Maybe, But because according to a professional gambler, he got
gold status at the Cosmo in Vegas.

Speaker 3 (01:56):
Time.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
He did it after playing seven hours at a five
dollars slot Missie then took his winnings and played at
a twenty five dollars slot machine for four more hours.

Speaker 3 (02:06):
It's more about longevity, not necessarily the amount you're spending.

Speaker 1 (02:10):
Yeah, you want them to take pity on you for
like just trying and trying and failing. But Gold status
got him a free room, free food and drinks for
the rest of his trip. Wound up spending sixty six
thousand dollars while he was there, which actually got him
upgraded to Platinum status, which included free limo rides and

(02:31):
a VIP lounge at the casino, plus a free suite
inside the hotel.

Speaker 4 (02:36):
Nothing is free, guys.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
He just spent sixty six thousand.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
Dollars over the course of the last seven years. He says,
he spent eight hundred and eleven thousand dollars total on
slots and wound up with a net loss of just
thirty five grand. Hey wait, he takes that the deal
because he estimates that with all the free perks that
he got during that time, those were worth over sixty grand.

(03:02):
Roomshole Alexis was right, Yeah, not worth it.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
Not worth it.

Speaker 1 (03:08):
We all encourage you to empty out your savings account
right now, go to bed and sit down at a
slot machine for seventeen hours and rack the rewards.

Speaker 4 (03:17):
How do you stay alone? Nor may I lose one
hundred bucks in three minutes?

Speaker 3 (03:21):
Did you hear the sixty six thousand dollars parts.

Speaker 1 (03:23):
So there we go. One of the perks of being
on this show is being shocked by an electric dog
shock collar. So let's breath the rewards. Jake, give us
something that's shockingly delicious.

Speaker 6 (03:33):
Well, I know, for some using your body to move
up the corporate ladder can be sleazy yet effective.

Speaker 4 (03:39):
Yeah, very effective?

Speaker 6 (03:41):
Is that true?

Speaker 4 (03:41):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (03:42):
Right, you should look at Jeffrey for that one.

Speaker 7 (03:45):
Let's be honest.

Speaker 1 (03:46):
I actually got to moded, so don't look over here.

Speaker 6 (03:49):
For most of us, the only way to rise up
in the business world is by going through the job
interview process, which can be stressful because you desperately want
it to go.

Speaker 1 (03:59):
Well.

Speaker 6 (04:00):
Is why a new survey asked one thousand people to
name something you fear happening during an important job interview. Okay,
let's get into those answers in an all new edition
of Unglued Family Feud. We'll start with the guy who,
in every job interview has uttered the phrase, well, it
wasn't like this in prison, Jeffrey.

Speaker 1 (04:20):
That's a fair point.

Speaker 6 (04:21):
Jeffrey named something you fear happening during an important job interview?

Speaker 1 (04:25):
Well, first thing that happens in a job interview. You're
setting the tone with a handshake. Yeah, And I can't
tell you how many times that's gone wrong for me.

Speaker 3 (04:34):
How handshake?

Speaker 1 (04:35):
Trying to make eye contact while I'm going in for
the shake and before you know, you miss the hand
and you're shaking a different body part.

Speaker 3 (04:42):
You need to look at him for the corporate lad.

Speaker 1 (04:47):
I'm gonna go with handshake mishap for five hundred dollars.

Speaker 6 (04:50):
Please show me handshake mishap. Not in the top four.

Speaker 1 (04:56):
Jeff got demoted again.

Speaker 8 (04:59):
I don't know.

Speaker 9 (04:59):
The whole thing I hate.

Speaker 3 (05:01):
Is it just being too hungover when you come in
for jobs?

Speaker 1 (05:05):
Did come in reeking of booze and cheap love from.

Speaker 3 (05:08):
The Yeah, she knew the industry. This is the.

Speaker 4 (05:14):
Yeah.

Speaker 9 (05:14):
But I'm always scared, you know, like I don't actually
want them to ask about my past jobs and stuff
because I fluffed everything up, like none of it's really true.

Speaker 4 (05:22):
Yeah, I worked as a rocket scientist.

Speaker 8 (05:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (05:25):
They asked for details about your skills and stuff you
could go with, like getting caught lying or exaggerating on
your resume.

Speaker 9 (05:32):
I've definitely had resumes where they'll ask me that like
something Indeed, somebody say getting caught lying.

Speaker 6 (05:37):
Jake getting caught lying.

Speaker 10 (05:40):
In the top four.

Speaker 6 (05:42):
I'm sorry, Jose, name something you fear happening during an
important job interview.

Speaker 5 (05:46):
Well, my first instinct is to say, like some kind
of bathroom or like stomach emergency.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
Of course that's your.

Speaker 5 (05:53):
Every time where I go to the bathroom, like all
the time. So I'm like, what if I have to
be really bad in the million.

Speaker 3 (05:58):
Interview and nerves can make your tummy upset?

Speaker 5 (06:01):
I think I'm gonna go with stomach issues or bathroom emergency.

Speaker 1 (06:04):
Jake, bathroom mishap.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
I think you guys are thinking too deep on this.
I think you need to go more simple, like for me.
You know, I am terrible with names. It is such
a stress for me.

Speaker 1 (06:22):
Is it their name or your name that you forget the.

Speaker 3 (06:25):
Name of the company. It's like it's it's a I
don't know. Is there a disorder where you can't remember names?
Probably because I have it, and it gives me tons
of anxiety forgetting.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Their name, forgetting names.

Speaker 6 (06:39):
That's number four on the list.

Speaker 4 (06:42):
That's Jake, by the way.

Speaker 3 (06:43):
Oh yeah, I've been calling him Jason.

Speaker 6 (06:47):
Call me whatever you want, Brooke, You're safe. Let's go
back over to Jeffrey, something you fear happening during an
important job interview.

Speaker 5 (06:53):
Maybe it's like the way you look, maybe like you
have spinach in your teeth and you don't know it.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
I mean, I showed up to the radio interview here
wearing a full, like two piece suit, which I which.
When I showed up and I saw everybody in very
casual clothes, I realized I was horribly, horribly mistressed. I
also did that.

Speaker 3 (07:10):
I wore a power suit when I was twenty two.

Speaker 8 (07:12):
They teach you that.

Speaker 1 (07:13):
Yeah, but if you're overdressed, or if you're really underdressed
for an interview and you show up in like board
shorts and flips flops.

Speaker 3 (07:20):
Or something, yeah, I think you'd be overdressed.

Speaker 1 (07:22):
Well, I'm just gonna say, if you're not dressed right
for the interview.

Speaker 6 (07:25):
Not being dressed right, that's number three. That's correct, Jeffrey.
To shovel the appearance a missap with your clothing. We'll
count that all for number three. Let's go back over
to Alexis. The next person to get something right is say,
if the other person's getting shot, Alexis, don't steal my answer.

Speaker 4 (07:39):
You always take what I'm.

Speaker 3 (07:40):
I can't think of what else are you nervous about?

Speaker 4 (07:42):
And I have another one.

Speaker 1 (07:43):
What if they just ask you a question and you
just don't have an answer.

Speaker 3 (07:47):
That's what I said, Oh caught lying?

Speaker 1 (07:48):
You said you were lying on the resident. But what
if they're like, what are your goals for the next
five years? And you're like, ah, and do always.

Speaker 3 (07:54):
Get worried They're gonna ask me like a trick question,
like what your musical interests are? You hate? I hate
that question.

Speaker 9 (07:58):
I'd rather not take it. Not having a good answer, Jake.

Speaker 6 (08:03):
Not having a good answer, that's correct, sounding stupid, getting
tongue tied, stuff like that. Let's quickly go over the top.
Four Name something you fear happening during an important job interview.
Alexis got number one, sounding stupid or getting tongue tied.
Number two was sweating physically looking nervous. Number three was

(08:24):
disheveled appearance or clothing. This happened. Number four brook gott,
which was forgetting names.

Speaker 1 (08:29):
All right, well, Jose is going to be taking the
shock this morning. Somebody wanted to hear the song price
tag by Jesse j So Jose, let's hear it.

Speaker 4 (08:37):
It's that about the money, money, money.

Speaker 10 (08:39):
We don't need your money, money money.

Speaker 3 (08:43):
I knew where the lyrics regarding I do.

Speaker 1 (08:47):
That's your shock collar question of the day. Got your
phones have coming up in just a few.

Speaker 8 (08:51):
Minutes, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 1 (08:55):
Sometimes people ask us about how certain segments started on
the show Cow did we come up with them? And
the history behind this next one is actually kind of
interesting because it was years ago when we first had
a quiet, shy, timid little comedian auditioning trying to join
our program. We heard rumors that he was funny, but

(09:19):
we could barely get him to open up about himself
and speak or even make a joke. I know, it's
hard to imagine that he was ever like this. So
we thought, you know what, let's do a segment where
we ask everybody to just be vulnerable and share their
thoughts with the road. And that's when finally Kevin Hart

(09:40):
opened up and it launched his comedy career. Wow, he
looked at what happened to him.

Speaker 3 (09:50):
You're welcome, ket.

Speaker 1 (09:52):
Actually, some say Alexis is the next tiny blonde Kevin
Hart of this generation. Someone sure does. We're gonna hear
her thoughts in launchering the super stardom in a brand
new edition of What's on Your Mind that's coming up
right now. You know, technically a burrito is just a

(10:12):
sleeping bag for food. It's brooken Jeffary in the morning,
and technically our brains are just wet sleeping bags for
our thoughts. Hopefully yours is moist, because right now we're
gonna zip our thought bags and air out what's inside
for a brand new What's on Your Mind, starting with

(10:34):
Brooke Brook, what's zipped up inside your wet thought bag?

Speaker 3 (10:38):
I don't like that. Let me open it up, Jeff.
So last week there was a snow day for our kids.
They had to stay home from school, which used to
be exciting until online learning came along. So they have
to be on the screen all day. And the teachers
are amazing. They're all therese Teacheries in second grade is

(11:00):
teaching twenty five, seven and eight year olds on a
zoom call. It is just pure chaos.

Speaker 11 (11:07):
Shook.

Speaker 3 (11:07):
So at one point they go to recess, so they
have a little break and everybody leaves the zoom call
at even the teacher. Apparently, during her recess time, she
notices that the back awning of her house is drooping
because of the snow, right, and so she goes out
to investigate. Well, the whole thing comes crashing down on
her head. Oh yes, but she wraps her head up

(11:30):
with like an ice pack, and she's teaching. She teaches you, guys,
for the rest of the day. She finishes the stories,
she does the whole thing. Well, turns out she didn't
stop bleeding the entire time, ends up going to the er.
She had taught the class with a fractured school, genuinely
fracture her school. So all I'm saying is that we

(11:54):
are not paying these poor teachers. The teacher came back,
I came and taught my child a broken head.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
Well, you probably can teach the right type of lessons.
If she's got a concussion. You probably need to tell
your son forget everything you learned that day because your
teacher wasn't making any sense.

Speaker 3 (12:12):
She says out this evil It's like, I'm so sorry,
I'm gonna have to take a day off tomorrow because
my head is pressure.

Speaker 8 (12:19):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (12:20):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (12:21):
When they were hungover.

Speaker 1 (12:24):
Those days, Jose, what's on your mind?

Speaker 5 (12:27):
Well, a few of my friends went to the casino
recently to bet on the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 (12:32):
I decided to stay home.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
I'm gonna save money.

Speaker 5 (12:35):
I got vacations coming up, whatever, until I got a
text one of my buddies is like, bro, I can
make bets for you while I am here. So I immediately
changed my mind.

Speaker 3 (12:47):
Easy to give into peer pressure.

Speaker 1 (12:49):
Well, yeah, that's true.

Speaker 5 (12:51):
So I'm like, let's bet on the coin flip. Oh no,
I always say tales never fails. It's my life motto
pretty much.

Speaker 3 (12:58):
Okay, so you're actually betting on the act coins from
the beginning those odd prop bets.

Speaker 4 (13:03):
Yes, there's a prop bet. I say, let's just started out.

Speaker 5 (13:05):
Let's warm up one hundred dollars and on heads.

Speaker 1 (13:09):
Because I always picked tails.

Speaker 5 (13:11):
I always picked tails, guys would.

Speaker 4 (13:16):
I thought this is gonna be different.

Speaker 5 (13:18):
It's tales one hundred dollars immediately, okay, And it's okay,
I know football, I know sports.

Speaker 1 (13:24):
Okay. So then I'm like, well.

Speaker 5 (13:26):
At least the Chiefs are gonna score first, you know
what I mean.

Speaker 4 (13:31):
You know they're gonna be the ones to get the ball.

Speaker 5 (13:34):
Oh, by the way, I put two hundred on that
because I gotta make up for my last bet.

Speaker 1 (13:37):
The Eagles scored first.

Speaker 5 (13:39):
Remember that for a long time you know what happens
when you're down three hundred dollars.

Speaker 4 (13:45):
You think you know what.

Speaker 5 (13:46):
NFL is scripted anyway, Right, So I'm gonna bet yet
another two hundred dollars that the.

Speaker 4 (13:53):
Chiefs are gonna win the game. They're totally gonna win.

Speaker 1 (14:00):
Yeah, so I'm down five dollars.

Speaker 4 (14:03):
I'm not happy. I'm like, this is the whole reason
I didn't go to the casino.

Speaker 5 (14:06):
And then my phone goes off and another text, and
I'm like, what is happening? And the gatorade has just
been dumped on the coach and it was yellow, which
means that I lost the show as well as Bowler's cat.

Speaker 3 (14:24):
I wonder you just answered the group text with damn.

Speaker 1 (14:31):
Maybe next year, alexis what's on your mind?

Speaker 9 (14:34):
So I went bowling the other day for the first
time in year. That's why the last time I went,
and I was killing it were you? I was winning
and I was getting a little cocky, and I'm going
around bragging. I'm like, I'm doing better than everyone here.

Speaker 3 (14:46):
My friend were you in eighth grade?

Speaker 1 (14:48):
Like, yeah, the bumpers were.

Speaker 3 (14:51):
My friend would't let me use bumpers.

Speaker 9 (14:53):
I tried ask, but my friends are like, Alexis, no,
you're not, like, are you really drunk?

Speaker 3 (14:58):
And I was like, no, I'm sober.

Speaker 9 (14:59):
I don't know what you're talking about. And they're not
from here, so I was like, maybe you do bowling
different in Argentina, but here the lowest score wins.

Speaker 3 (15:06):
And I'm in the sixties and you're in the one twenties,
so I am dominating. Are you joking?

Speaker 2 (15:14):
Yes?

Speaker 9 (15:15):
It was confident that the lowest score and bowling wins.

Speaker 8 (15:18):
No.

Speaker 1 (15:19):
So when they were doubling.

Speaker 9 (15:20):
Me, I was like, I am so good, you guys
sixty Yeah, I did get so perfect. Yeah, I did
google it and find out hi Google.

Speaker 1 (15:33):
It's probably like as a child growing up, she was
so terrible and her parents were like, no, no, no, honey,
Lewis score wins in this game.

Speaker 3 (15:41):
Yeah I didn't seeming her credit.

Speaker 9 (15:43):
I don't know, but basically I don't like bowling anymore.
I was a high high for ten minutes there and
then it just you.

Speaker 1 (15:50):
Are go pro like awful, Yeah you thought, yeah.

Speaker 9 (15:52):
Okay, anyways, freedom and bowling just no, all right, everyone's on.

Speaker 1 (15:59):
Your mind right now. Everything in my house is going good. Oh,
for the first time in four months since I bought
the place.

Speaker 3 (16:08):
Do we knock on wood knock on?

Speaker 1 (16:10):
Plumbing is working, electrical, water, septic, and gas all functioning properly.
But there is a new issue that's cropped up.

Speaker 3 (16:21):
What's that?

Speaker 1 (16:21):
And I'd say, now, a couple times a week birds
are flying seventy miles an hour straight into my windows
and they're not surviving.

Speaker 8 (16:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (16:32):
Really, you gotta put some stickers on your windows.

Speaker 1 (16:35):
It's gotten to the point where every night at dusk
I have to walk the perimeter with a broom and
just sweep off everything that's happening.

Speaker 3 (16:42):
If I have a bird lovers not a bird killer.

Speaker 1 (16:44):
You know how much I love birds. It's absolutely horrible,
which is why I came up with a plan. I
got a life side cardboard cutout of a bird watcher,
and I'm going to place it in the giant window
looking out with binoculars.

Speaker 3 (16:58):
You could just put a couple of little reflect stickers.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
But that's like what birds like. They want to see
somebody watching them. That way, the birds won't want to
com akazi my windows anymore.

Speaker 4 (17:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
My one concern is that my neighbors might think I'm
trying to peeping tom them if they see the cardboard
binocular guy in the window, but jokes on them because
I've already been doing that.

Speaker 3 (17:18):
For Yeah, guys, it's a good burglar deterrent.

Speaker 1 (17:23):
Making all the improvements at my house and hopefully no
more bird deaths. Text in to seven eight five nine
two and tell us what's been on your mind. It's
Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 8 (17:33):
Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.

Speaker 1 (17:35):
Get a lot of texts in at seven eighty five
nine two with our listeners wanted to tell us what's
been on their mind because we just shared what's on ours.
This text says what's on my mind. I can't stop
thinking about how cute Jeffrey is. Okay, mom, why do
you keep texting? We block her from this board.

Speaker 3 (17:53):
It's like a compliment for your mom. Finally, yeah, I
mean there's that.

Speaker 1 (17:56):
I'm sick of it. This one says good morning, love
you guys. And what's on my mind is how Alexis
has all these credit cards and Brooke doesn't help her
pay them off ever. Brook the loaded one.

Speaker 3 (18:08):
So you can give a man a fish, but if
you teach him to fish, then he'll do the lifetime
give me money.

Speaker 7 (18:16):
This is credit.

Speaker 1 (18:16):
Cards says, I went on a six hour amazing date
and got pulled over taking her home. Didn't get a ticket,
but she thought I was reckless because of it and
didn't go out with me again. Attractive, Yeah you should,
that's the Probably. The problem is that you didn't peel
out as soon as the complights came out.

Speaker 3 (18:37):
You were polite. Yes, that's what happened.

Speaker 1 (18:43):
Keep your text coming.

Speaker 8 (18:44):
Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 1 (18:47):
Every year has four seasons. Yeah, I'm not talking about spring, summer, winter,
and fall.

Speaker 3 (18:54):
What are you talking about.

Speaker 1 (18:55):
I'm talking about cuffing season, breakup season, random mating season one,
and the one we're in right now, Suffering Singles season,
the time of year where more people than ever find
themselves going on terrible dates. Personally, I look forward to
this time every single team, because I mean I do

(19:18):
love a little gentle suffering myself, but mostly it gives
other people stories that they can bring to our next segment,
because we're doing a brand new Battle of the Tender
Dates celebrating Suffering single season coming up right after this T.

Speaker 8 (19:34):
One dating app Then there's you guys, swipe right. The
question is whose love life is more tragic?

Speaker 1 (19:43):
It's Battle of the Tinder Dates. It is the dating
game show that defied medical science by somehow getting itself
pregnant and cut the whole thing on camera. It's Battle
of the Tinder Dates, where two of our listeners square
off to find out who love life is the most tragic.
We'll explain the rules in just a second. First, let's

(20:04):
meet today's contestants. In this corner, before every kiss, she
likes to give herself citrusy fresh breath by gargling a
bottle of OJ with extra pulp, and that's why she's
known as Juicy Lucy.

Speaker 3 (20:20):
Hey guy, I feel like she does it right after
she brushes her teeth.

Speaker 1 (20:27):
And in the other corner, she can seduce any man
with her patented dance move, the slow motion twerk with
double finger guns pistol rip crystal. Hey guys, what's up?

Speaker 3 (20:44):
Jose just tried to do that in studio. I love it.

Speaker 1 (20:48):
Here's how the game works. One contestant will start by
telling one of their worst date stories. Then we'll try
and counter with a nightmare story of their own. We're
going back and forth for three rounds until we declare winner.
We're gonna start things off with Juicy Lucy, let's go.

Speaker 7 (21:03):
Okay.

Speaker 12 (21:04):
So I was at a guy's place. He took me dinner,
and afterward I asked like, you.

Speaker 7 (21:09):
Know, do you want any help with the dishes?

Speaker 12 (21:11):
And he was like, oh, don't worry about it. His
dog licks all of his plates clean.

Speaker 3 (21:18):
No no, and you had already eaten.

Speaker 7 (21:22):
And he wasn't joking.

Speaker 1 (21:24):
O God, that nasty pistol whip crystal. Can you counter?

Speaker 7 (21:33):
Yeah?

Speaker 13 (21:33):
So I went out to drink with this guy.

Speaker 7 (21:35):
He was he was like.

Speaker 13 (21:36):
Super rich and everything. We had this really fancy upscales,
like bougie piano bar.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Okay.

Speaker 13 (21:42):
When we got there, he requested the pianist to play
baby Shark.

Speaker 1 (21:48):
Only, one of the most romantic songs of all time?

Speaker 3 (21:51):
Was he trying to be funny?

Speaker 13 (21:53):
I mean I thought so the first time, but it
wasn't just one time. I swear it was like six
or seven times.

Speaker 7 (22:00):
Oh way.

Speaker 3 (22:00):
I mean that song gets stuck in your head and just.

Speaker 4 (22:04):
Don't keep requesting it.

Speaker 1 (22:05):
That's part of the fun is to keep repeating it.

Speaker 13 (22:08):
But he was also paying the guary too, so he
was like dropping big money. And this guy, I wear
like fifteen minutes. He must have paid, like I don't know, like.

Speaker 7 (22:15):
Two hundred dollars.

Speaker 8 (22:16):
Oh whoa.

Speaker 13 (22:18):
I was so mortified by the end of it. It
was just like everyone was like, give me the depth stare,
and I was like, oh my god, I gotta get
out of here.

Speaker 3 (22:25):
I'll call you daddy sharp.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
Yeah, there was jealous of you. We're on to round two, Lucy.
Back to you, all right.

Speaker 12 (22:33):
So I was at dinner with a guy when he
got a call and he was like, oh my god,
I'm so sorry.

Speaker 7 (22:38):
I have to take this right.

Speaker 3 (22:39):
Okay.

Speaker 12 (22:39):
So I'm like, oh, it's fine, it's fine.

Speaker 3 (22:41):
It happened.

Speaker 12 (22:41):
Sometimes he gets into an argument with the person.

Speaker 3 (22:47):
About what.

Speaker 7 (22:49):
I wasn't sure at first.

Speaker 12 (22:50):
I could tell it was a woman.

Speaker 1 (22:51):
Oh no, that's not good.

Speaker 12 (22:54):
It turns out it was his mom.

Speaker 3 (22:56):
Oh oh oh yeah, je just like I get this,
I get this.

Speaker 1 (22:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 12 (23:00):
He was like screaming at his mom. And even though
this man was thirty seven years old, he was upset
with him because he didn't finish his chores that day
and she wanted him to come straight.

Speaker 13 (23:15):
Time out.

Speaker 14 (23:18):
Mom.

Speaker 5 (23:18):
The resident are soaking Okay, you'll get to it, Crystal.

Speaker 1 (23:23):
Back to you. Yeah.

Speaker 13 (23:24):
So I went on this coffee date and this guy
showed up wearing scrubs and I was thinking, like, oh,
a doctor, you know, Like yeah.

Speaker 14 (23:33):
I was like, oh, I feel so bad.

Speaker 13 (23:34):
He just got off of work, ita whatever, and he's like,
oh no, it's okay, like, don't worry about it. He
works in insurance. And I was super confused, so I
was like, wait, what do you what do you mean? Well,
apparently he got the scrubs from like the soft store
down the street. And I was like, you're comfany, I guess, but.

Speaker 7 (23:50):
Like why are you wearing them?

Speaker 13 (23:52):
And he's like, oh, well, if I happened to bail
on the date or whatever, he would just use the
scrubs to say he was a doctor. And then he
would go, Hen'll never risk oh.

Speaker 8 (24:02):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (24:02):
And he explained this to you.

Speaker 15 (24:05):
Got to respect a man with a plan, not a
lot of guys.

Speaker 1 (24:09):
On to our third and final round. We need your
best stories here, ladies. So Lucy, what have you got?

Speaker 7 (24:14):
Okay?

Speaker 12 (24:15):
So I hung out with this guy on my birthday.

Speaker 7 (24:18):
Afterwards, we go to his place, right yeah, and when
we when we walk in.

Speaker 12 (24:23):
He had actually hung up a little banner for me.

Speaker 7 (24:27):
It's decorated.

Speaker 12 (24:28):
Yeah, there were party streamers and like he even had
a cake.

Speaker 3 (24:32):
Oh my gosh, I.

Speaker 12 (24:36):
Was over the moon, and so he sang for me,
he took a picture.

Speaker 7 (24:40):
I was like so happy.

Speaker 12 (24:42):
No date had ever done anything like this for me before. Yes,
But then he tells me don't touch any of it
because all the party supplies were pretty expensive and he
had to return them in the morning.

Speaker 8 (25:00):
Even like cake.

Speaker 3 (25:01):
I couldn't even touch the cake.

Speaker 7 (25:03):
It was all for the picture.

Speaker 4 (25:06):
The cake.

Speaker 3 (25:07):
Alexis wants to know if it was his instagram worthy.

Speaker 12 (25:10):
Yeah, I mean I didn't post it, but still, come.

Speaker 1 (25:13):
On, here we go, crystal last shot.

Speaker 13 (25:18):
So I went back to the sky place right because
they had a great date or whatever. But I had
to use the restroom. Okay, so well I'm while I'm
in there, he had one of those kids, like potty
trainings or whatever.

Speaker 8 (25:30):
Kid.

Speaker 1 (25:31):
Yeah, I also worrying about.

Speaker 3 (25:32):
I was like, I didn't know.

Speaker 13 (25:33):
You, you know, had a kid, and he's like, oh, well,
I don't have a kid. The little ponies for me
to use by the couch when I'm too lazy to
walk in the bathroom. Oh literally, just like throw up
the wom out. It was so gross.

Speaker 4 (25:49):
Oh my gosh, put these all over my apartment.

Speaker 1 (25:51):
Just for number one though, Oh god.

Speaker 3 (25:54):
Why would you come on?

Speaker 1 (25:57):
Sorry, we can't go any deeper into that, as much
as we wanted to dis yuh so there was the
final bell. We need to go and score this with
the judges. Alexis, who are you giving it to you?

Speaker 9 (26:05):
Crystal? I have a new fear unlocked that every man
has a little toilet next to his.

Speaker 1 (26:09):
Can We have room for Crystal Broo.

Speaker 3 (26:12):
I just still can't get over the dog licking the
plates clean. I give it to Lucy.

Speaker 1 (26:15):
You're all tied up, jose You read the deciding factor.

Speaker 5 (26:18):
Oh man, Well gotta go with Lucy with the mom
calling him on the.

Speaker 1 (26:22):
Chooras juicy, Lucy, you four thousand of our listeners to
uninstall Tinder forever.

Speaker 3 (26:33):
She's crying, but not for good reasons.

Speaker 1 (26:35):
Text in seven, eight, five nine too, if you want
to appear on the next edition of Battle of the
Tender Days. We got your phone tap coming up right
after this.

Speaker 8 (26:42):
Brooking Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 1 (26:44):
You guys in this room, No, I slay the charity auctions, right,
you do?

Speaker 4 (26:49):
Though that's not even a joke.

Speaker 1 (26:53):
The charity auction circuit. Brook I come in there with
my tucks, throw out some zingers, grab somebody's to pay,
toss back of Martin, raise a cool seven figures, and
then I'm done. But I'll tell you it's not that
easy for everyone. In fact, one woman who's putting one
on for the very first time is freaking out right

(27:14):
now because she hasn't spoken with her.

Speaker 5 (27:16):
MC yet such event they run the whole show.

Speaker 1 (27:22):
She's about to meet him, and it could be possibly
the worst fit ever because his name is Timid Benjamin. Yeah,
he's ready to go all in for charity. With your
phones out right.

Speaker 8 (27:34):
Now as on the twenties.

Speaker 10 (27:40):
Hello, I is this Marianda?

Speaker 7 (27:46):
Yeah?

Speaker 8 (27:47):
Who's this?

Speaker 10 (27:48):
My name is is Benjamin from Speakers and I was
hired to be the MC for your your charity auction
this weekend. You're the m Yes that is that is correct,
or as as the French would say. And I took

(28:12):
one year of French in middle school. I'm sure.

Speaker 16 (28:16):
Okay, I need to talk to you about the charity event.

Speaker 10 (28:20):
Actually I read the event program that you sent.

Speaker 7 (28:25):
Okay, great.

Speaker 10 (28:26):
It says, join us for a night of good food,
great wine, incredible auction items, all in honor of the animals.

Speaker 7 (28:37):
Yeah, I wrote that.

Speaker 10 (28:38):
So I have a question. Will you be selling illegal
animals that night? Or are we raising funds to capture
some what?

Speaker 16 (28:49):
We're raising funds for pets.

Speaker 7 (28:51):
That need homes.

Speaker 16 (28:53):
Why would we be capturing animals?

Speaker 10 (28:57):
I thought that that sounds more exciting.

Speaker 16 (29:00):
Can I ask you about your experience? Have you ever
m seed an event before?

Speaker 10 (29:06):
Well, I built a program on my computer. It's called
Charity Event Simulator. What I've told jokes to thousands of
approving avatars and almost sixty percent.

Speaker 1 (29:21):
Left yeah at some of them.

Speaker 16 (29:23):
I don't think that counts as actual experience.

Speaker 7 (29:26):
Am saying that?

Speaker 10 (29:28):
Excuse me?

Speaker 7 (29:29):
In real life?

Speaker 1 (29:29):
Excuse me with real people?

Speaker 10 (29:32):
Well, I don't think your opinion matters on that, but
excuse me.

Speaker 16 (29:37):
I think my opinion definitely matters. Because it's my charity
event that I'm hosting for the first time, and I'm there.

Speaker 10 (29:45):
Are some stipulations in my contract. You should know them
before the big event.

Speaker 16 (29:50):
I don't even know if you're going to be performing
at the at the event at this point.

Speaker 1 (29:57):
First, are you shooting me?

Speaker 10 (30:00):
Yes? Because I need to tell you I must have
my inhaler on the stage.

Speaker 16 (30:05):
My gosh.

Speaker 10 (30:06):
Yeah. Second, do you have perhaps a DJ? Booked.

Speaker 16 (30:11):
Why would I need a DJ It's it's an auction.

Speaker 10 (30:14):
Well, because I really I cracked up the simulator audience
with my Snoop dog impression.

Speaker 1 (30:20):
Oh okay, b o e p A okay, please stop?

Speaker 10 (30:25):
Snoop dogg is in the.

Speaker 16 (30:26):
How please stop? You have to stop?

Speaker 10 (30:31):
Then that that's from my simulator, Benjamin.

Speaker 1 (30:34):
I don't want to be rude.

Speaker 10 (30:36):
Actually it's actually a soft J. Then you I didn't
say it correctly. Please, I would appreciate if you addressed
me properly, soft J.

Speaker 16 (30:50):
Benmen, what I don't even know how to say what
you're saying. All I'm saying is ven Then.

Speaker 1 (30:57):
Then bow me. You are not well for my event.

Speaker 10 (31:01):
I would appreciate it if you didn't molly coddle me.

Speaker 8 (31:04):
Oh what is that?

Speaker 16 (31:05):
I don't even know what you're talking about.

Speaker 1 (31:07):
I'm open.

Speaker 5 (31:07):
I don't see how you.

Speaker 16 (31:08):
Could ever em see any event in real life.

Speaker 10 (31:11):
I have spoken in real groups before.

Speaker 16 (31:14):
And what and what groups?

Speaker 10 (31:16):
One time at my aunt Helen's bakesale, I had to
make an announcement that the cinnamon twists were two for one.

Speaker 1 (31:23):
Okay, I get goose pimples.

Speaker 10 (31:26):
Just thinking about the moment.

Speaker 16 (31:27):
Listen this is one hundred percent not gonna work. You
tell the company. I'll tell the company that I need
someone with real experience.

Speaker 10 (31:35):
Your partner, Lisa seems to disagree what I talked to her,
and she said, I have plenty of experience to do
a brank phone call on you. A prank phone call, gotcha?

Speaker 1 (31:49):
Oh my god, my real name is jeff from the
radio show Broke and Jeffrey in the Morning. We're doing
a phone tap on you.

Speaker 6 (31:54):
No, oh my god.

Speaker 16 (31:59):
You guys, you didn't sound like yourself.

Speaker 7 (32:04):
Problem.

Speaker 1 (32:05):
It's just me in the room today doing this. But
Lisa is the one who set you up. She says,
this is the first time that you're doing the auction,
and you were kind of nervous that you hadn't had
your speaker locked down. Yetsure.

Speaker 10 (32:17):
Yeah, I'm very very good under pressure, just like my
idle Snoop Dogg.

Speaker 11 (32:28):
Music.

Speaker 1 (32:31):
I'm not.

Speaker 8 (32:37):
Weak up. Every morning was foom taps weekday mornings on
the twenties Broke and Jeffrey in the Morning.

Speaker 1 (32:44):
If you could give one piece of advice to somebody
who's never tried a dating app before, what would it
be like. Maybe lower your expectations?

Speaker 3 (32:53):
Oh, definitely, solid.

Speaker 4 (32:55):
Don't open any pictures, okay from me?

Speaker 1 (32:59):
Sorry, use multiple filters. Yeah, add an extra two and
a half inches to what for your height? Right because
guys like taller girls?

Speaker 3 (33:11):
Right?

Speaker 1 (33:12):
Oh yeah, I'm not. I'm not the pro on this.
That's exactly the kind of help that one of our
listeners needs right now because she was coming out of
a long term relationship and decided to meet a guy
online for the very first time, and it went so
well that she's reaching out to us for help. I

(33:34):
would say she definitely didn't do the two and a
half inches trick. That's probably what it is. But you
know what, we'll see if we can help her on
the other side of it when we do your second
date update, next second date Update. You know, we've talked
about people getting back into the dating game after being
out of it for a while, but we don't normally
speak to people on this segment who are using dating

(33:55):
apps for the very first.

Speaker 3 (33:56):
Time, like ever.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
Ever, it's like a time warp. If you haven't dated
since twenty ten and you met somebody at a grocery store. Nowadays,
you're getting an eggplant, all right, but it's a digital one,
and I don't know if you even wanted it in
the first place. But that's what happened with Rachel. Recently,
she emailed us saying, this is her very first time

(34:18):
being on a dating app, and she actually met a
great guy who's somehow not calling her back. So Rachel, welcome, Hey,
thanks for having me.

Speaker 3 (34:26):
I'm just curious because I've ever been on dating apps, right,
because I met my husband like before, they were huge.
Oh yeah, like what is it like for your first time?

Speaker 14 (34:35):
It made me feel kind of old too, though, I
mean I had been in a relationship since college, so
like seven, you know what I mean. So, like I
just completely knew for me, and when I got flooded
with all these guys, it was exciting. It kind of
boosted my ego. But it took me about like two

(34:57):
and a half weeks to find someone actually fit all
of my criteria and that was Jack.

Speaker 3 (35:07):
Yeah, so you messaged him, so.

Speaker 14 (35:10):
He reached out to me. So I thought that was vulnerable,
you know what I mean, Like, that's pretty hardcore.

Speaker 8 (35:19):
And.

Speaker 1 (35:22):
Thousands of other guys did.

Speaker 5 (35:24):
But it's okay, he said, Hey, he's like, oh my god,
he's so formal.

Speaker 3 (35:29):
I mean, how long did it take you to go
out with him, like between talking to him on the
app and then the actual.

Speaker 14 (35:34):
Date actually about five days, so we started kind of
like Sunday Monday talking and then that weekend he was
free and I was free.

Speaker 3 (35:43):
So and I feel like a weekend date is a
big commitment day. I don't know, like using your weekend
for that.

Speaker 4 (35:50):
I'll take a date any day of the week. It
didn't work out.

Speaker 1 (35:53):
I think single people think anytime is a good time.
Married people like, my weekend is my own time. So
what did you guys end up doing? Rachel?

Speaker 14 (36:03):
So we ended up going to dinner? Okay, it was
really really sweet. We we met there. So I took
an uber.

Speaker 3 (36:10):
And what what was that like for you? Because it's
like your.

Speaker 1 (36:13):
First dating technology is amazing.

Speaker 3 (36:22):
It's her first dating app, it's the first guy she's
met on this, Like, I would be so nervous if
I were you, just because God, that's a lot. It's
a lot.

Speaker 14 (36:32):
I'm a huge fan of broad City, and I felt
like I was in city. What was the actual date, like, Oh, well,
he was just such a gentleman, like he was dreaming.
He was such a good listener to you guys, Like
that's important.

Speaker 1 (36:47):
He was what It's important.

Speaker 3 (36:52):
Did your ex come up a lot, because I mean,
you did mention to us that you were together for
a really, really long time.

Speaker 14 (36:58):
It did because, like I said, it was over a decade,
and each thing that came up, he seemed to roll
with it and it didn't seem to bother him. I mean,
because here's the thing. I was up front with him
from the get go, and I told him straightforward that
I'm not going to go home with him.

Speaker 1 (37:15):
Oh, this is like immediately after the handshake her when
is this?

Speaker 14 (37:19):
This was like after the first appetizer, just because I
wanted to kind of loosen things up, but I just
didn't want to get too loose, if you know what
I mean.

Speaker 4 (37:29):
Okay, but it also sounds good. You want to set
boundaries and he should.

Speaker 3 (37:33):
It could also come across as rude though, like you're
also assuming that that's all he's looking for.

Speaker 1 (37:38):
You know, like Brooks only saying that because she never
never crossed her.

Speaker 3 (37:52):
Okay, he could have been insulted by that was his reaction.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
Were you able to gauge it?

Speaker 14 (37:56):
He was taken aback, but he said he wasn't expecting anything,
So maybe, like you said, he did just kind of
threw him off or whatever. And I mean, here's the thing.
When you talked about bringing out my ex for the
first time, I didn't. I didn't cry. Guys, you know.

Speaker 2 (38:11):
I was da I'm glad.

Speaker 14 (38:16):
Teared up whenever I think is Dylan, you know that's.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
My ex and I I hear Rachel crying right now
even just mentioning it.

Speaker 3 (38:28):
That's hard. You probably were still emotional then. If you're
just like just now not crying talking about him, I.

Speaker 14 (38:35):
Think maybe that the drinks didn't help, you know.

Speaker 4 (38:40):
Enhances it.

Speaker 3 (38:41):
Do you think that that's why Jack isn't calling you back?

Speaker 14 (38:44):
I don't think so. No, he was, like I said,
he didn't see it, like he didn't seem like he
was weirded out by it at all. And no, it
seems time.

Speaker 4 (38:55):
We all know you.

Speaker 5 (38:55):
Obviously didn't hook up, But did you guys like kids
or hug or do anything else that's like intimate.

Speaker 14 (39:02):
No, was a gentleman.

Speaker 9 (39:04):
So we just like sing the side hug like I
do with all my friends.

Speaker 14 (39:10):
Okay, that's it was my first date. Like I haven't
been in a real in person date in over a decade.
By give me a break.

Speaker 1 (39:21):
Yeah, we're.

Speaker 8 (39:23):
On this.

Speaker 1 (39:24):
We're just sorry. We've heard a lot of dating stories,
but your sounds very nice, especially for your first time
back into the dating pool, first time on a dating app.
So let's let's play a song. We'll give not Dylan,
uh Jack, Jack.

Speaker 3 (39:40):
I am so sorry.

Speaker 1 (39:42):
I promise you, Rachel, I will not call him Dylan. Okay.
In fact, this is gonna be the last time I
ever say Dylan on this show. Okay, song, We'll come
back and we'll call Jack for you, not Dylan. Right
after this second date.

Speaker 5 (39:58):
We'll be Dylan's number, dialing as number.

Speaker 1 (40:06):
If you're just joining us for the second date. We're
talking to Rachel, who went on her first first date
in a very long time. Yeah, she said, it's been
more than a decade since she's gone on one, and
she's never been on a dating app before. This was
her first time on a dating app and that was
a little bit overwhelming, which is understandable totally. In fact,
I'm gonna do an impression right now of a guy

(40:28):
seeing fresh meat on a dating apple. Take the music down,
Oh yeah, oh a newbie. We're gonna stay in Applebee's
for twenty minutes and then go back to my mom's
house and she's gonna watch me play Mario kart oh Man.

Speaker 3 (40:43):
So it's like she was dating in college all over again.

Speaker 1 (40:46):
You're saying Jack, who she met, wasn't like that. He
was different, he was a gentleman. And how do I
know that they were a good match because Rachel said
she didn't cry once during their entire.

Speaker 3 (40:58):
Cry about her ex.

Speaker 1 (41:00):
Well cry in general, Yeah, no tears, that's love. Yeah. So, Rachel,
we're about to give Jack a call. How are you feeling?

Speaker 14 (41:07):
Honestly, I'm hoping for the best. There was nothing but
positive vibes. So I feel like something happened, maybe at
his job or family. I don't know. I hope everything's okay,
but he's just perfect.

Speaker 3 (41:18):
And also it's like, you know this is new to you.
There's a lot of options out there that you haven't
even explored.

Speaker 1 (41:25):
I kept talking on the town, right, that's.

Speaker 3 (41:31):
How you get over people, Joe.

Speaker 5 (41:33):
There is there is one thing that doesn't change in dating,
and that's vibes. Like you can tell if something happened
on the date. You could pinpoint a moment usually, so
you don't feel like there was something, then.

Speaker 4 (41:42):
Maybe there was.

Speaker 3 (41:43):
She hasn't even really dated in her adult life. I mean,
you've had the same boyfriend since you were in college,
you know, like just want you to make up for
lost time. But okay, let's call Jack.

Speaker 1 (41:52):
You know what, We're just gonna stop projecting our feelings
and our failed relationships onto you. We're just gonna dial
Jack and see what he has to say.

Speaker 11 (42:00):
Okay, okay, okay, Yes, Hello, Hey is this Jack?

Speaker 7 (42:16):
Yeah? This is Jack?

Speaker 10 (42:17):
Is this hey Jack?

Speaker 1 (42:18):
My name is Jeff from the radio show Brook and
Jeffrey in the Morning.

Speaker 8 (42:21):
Hello.

Speaker 1 (42:23):
Oh, that's that's my co host Brook, who just jumped
in with a weird voice.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
No, it just sounded like how he was hitting on
us when we answered the phone. So I was like
returning the favorite Jack.

Speaker 4 (42:32):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (42:34):
I just think it's interesting because like it was an
unknown number, right, Were you expecting someone else on the phone?

Speaker 8 (42:39):
Jack?

Speaker 7 (42:40):
I'm sorry, what is this all about you?

Speaker 1 (42:42):
I'm sure you're very confused. This lady is talking at
you and kind of hitting on you at the same time.
So we're a morning radio show and we're doing a
segment called the Second Date Update, where we're trying to
help one of our listeners get in touch with you
after you went out. Oh jeez, sounds like fun.

Speaker 7 (42:59):
Right, all right, what do you What do you need
from me?

Speaker 3 (43:05):
Well, we heard a lot of good things about you,
so that's a good start.

Speaker 1 (43:08):
And we heard them from one of our listeners named Rachel.
Oh okay, yeah, yeah, So tell us what you thought
about Rachel.

Speaker 7 (43:18):
I mean, Rachel was she's nice?

Speaker 3 (43:22):
Would she attracted me? Were you attracted to her? Did
you feel like you guys had some chemistry?

Speaker 7 (43:28):
Yeah? You know, Uh, I think she's beautiful, she's really cool,
and I think maybe she's just going through a lot
right now and working through stuff. But what do you mean?
I was not prepared to talk about this.

Speaker 3 (43:43):
It's okay. I mean she told us some stuff about
like her ex and maybe how she talked about that
on the date.

Speaker 1 (43:50):
She's had a lot of really nice things about you,
about how you're a great guy.

Speaker 3 (43:53):
And a good listener. She said, you're a great listener.

Speaker 7 (43:57):
Well that's super nice of her. I she was just
really specific about what she wants and a guy and
kind of went on and on about how I fit those.

Speaker 3 (44:08):
Things, and that was that wasn't good to you.

Speaker 7 (44:12):
I mean, it's nice, it's nice, as I think it
was just like a little much at some point, what
was much like, I don't know, first dates are supposed
to be a little more chill and steer the conversation
towards things that are maybe more fun and getting to
know each other, and it was just basically at one

(44:33):
point I was like, look, I just want to get to.

Speaker 3 (44:35):
Know you, you.

Speaker 7 (44:36):
Know, and she she smiled, and she reached into her
purse and handed me an index card.

Speaker 3 (44:43):
Okay, what was on the index card?

Speaker 1 (44:45):
Index cards are sexy y?

Speaker 3 (44:47):
Is it a recipe from her grandma or something?

Speaker 7 (44:50):
I kind of wish it was on top it said
physical boundaries and kind of listed all these physical things
that she would allow and she also lived. Did them
buy date?

Speaker 3 (45:01):
Oh you mean like like first kiss, three dates in
you can touch my butt.

Speaker 7 (45:07):
Four dates exactly?

Speaker 1 (45:11):
It Wow, really.

Speaker 14 (45:14):
A lot of planning.

Speaker 1 (45:16):
Do you have the card?

Speaker 7 (45:17):
Yeah? Oh yeah, date one fist bump.

Speaker 3 (45:21):
Fist bump, I hug and high five.

Speaker 4 (45:24):
Ah, oh my god, send me the card before the date.

Speaker 1 (45:31):
From what we heard, it sounded like you did that
side hug on the first day.

Speaker 7 (45:35):
Oh yeah, yeah, we definitely we did. Actually we did
do this.

Speaker 1 (45:39):
Yeah. How was it? Oh?

Speaker 7 (45:41):
It was exactly what you did ex fact.

Speaker 3 (45:44):
Okay, so it wasn't necessarily her boundaries, it was the
way they were presented. Is that what you're saying.

Speaker 7 (45:50):
I think it's cool, like her therapist says, always create boundaries,
which she told me, you know, and I think it's
super healthy. That's great, but it's just not what I'm
looking for. It's just a little to me. And especially
talking about on the first date like that.

Speaker 3 (46:03):
You know, maybe there's a more organic way to work
in your boundaries than a five seven.

Speaker 1 (46:08):
Like what's more organic than having her be on the
radio with you and tell her her boundaries right now
because she's been on the other line listening, Jack, and
she wants to talk to you.

Speaker 8 (46:17):
No.

Speaker 3 (46:17):
Yeah, no, she's not respecting your boundary in that way, Rachel.

Speaker 7 (46:22):
No, Jack, Oh, we had some great time.

Speaker 14 (46:31):
I mean you you're such a sweetheart. You just told
me that you you like like you think I'm attractive,
you know, like I'm trying to be a great communicator,
you know what I mean, Like no gray areas I
thought you would appreciate to know exactly what I want,
what I needed, you know, like I'm not I'm not
trying to play games.

Speaker 3 (46:48):
Yeah, that's a hot pitch right there.

Speaker 1 (46:50):
I like, yeah, Jack, feel free to respond.

Speaker 7 (46:54):
Rachel Rachel, Okay, look, this is a I can't believe
you're We're on the radio right now. This is ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (47:00):
Ridiculous.

Speaker 14 (47:03):
Yeah, I think it's very fun.

Speaker 7 (47:05):
It's just even though I think you're a great person,
you were clearly physically attractive, and it's just like the
chemistry was just not there, you know, And like the
way this this whole boundary note card thing was was
brought up, it just kind of killed the vibe.

Speaker 1 (47:22):
And I know, maybe, dude, do you know how many
times a note card would have saved me on one
of my Craigslist meetups, whether or not like you think
it's if it's going too far or it's like taking
the spontaneity out of it. She's just trying to show
you what she's comfortable with doing before things get awkward.

(47:42):
I mean, it's her first day in a really, really
long time, so she's just trying to get her feedback
under her.

Speaker 7 (47:48):
It doesn't mean you need to be a robot, though.
It's like when I walk through your car, I have
to pull out the note card and check what I
can do if it's like bidhog small.

Speaker 14 (47:55):
Fle You said we didn't have any chemistry, but I
guarantee that server what it told you different. And to
be honest, it's your loss, because after date number five,
things really open up.

Speaker 1 (48:09):
The car.

Speaker 8 (48:10):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (48:11):
I mean the thing about Rachel, she sounds like someone
who's very organized and maybe very different from you and
could really bring some other aspects to your life that
you don't have.

Speaker 1 (48:21):
Right now, let's get to the second day on your
note card so we can get to some of that
other stuff, because we'd like to pay for that. What
do you say, Jack, give it another shot, Rachel.

Speaker 7 (48:32):
I just I think it's cool that you think we
had chemistry. I just think that, like a lot of
the fund was kind of drained out of it as
soon as those boundaries came up.

Speaker 3 (48:38):
And we give her a second chance on the second day,
she knows that already. She doesn't have a second note card,
do you, Rachel?

Speaker 14 (48:45):
Do you have another note not any more?

Speaker 2 (48:47):
Now?

Speaker 3 (48:48):
It's maybe you could just change. She's funny. She's funny, Jack,
all right.

Speaker 7 (48:53):
You know, if we can start over, If we can
start over.

Speaker 1 (48:56):
And.

Speaker 4 (49:00):
It's like a punch card, you're gonna get like a
free launches.

Speaker 3 (49:04):
So are you just saying yes? Is that what you're saying?

Speaker 7 (49:06):
Jack, I mean, yeah, okay, I'll say yes, But like
the card never happened.

Speaker 3 (49:12):
Okay, she still wants her Jack.

Speaker 14 (49:17):
I'm actually excited and I'm really happy that I was
vulnerable and called the station. Thank you, guys.

Speaker 1 (49:26):
You barely cried once during this entire call. That must
mean it was a positive experience.

Speaker 4 (49:31):
Yeah, just don't say that code word that makes her cry.

Speaker 8 (49:34):
It's Dylane. Oh God, brooking Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 1 (49:41):
Laser stories coming up in just a second. It's Brooke
and Jeffrey in the Morning. Make sure you follow us
by the way at Broken Jeffrey on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Facebook.

Speaker 3 (49:49):
God, you can see your new studio. It's so pretty. Ye.

Speaker 1 (49:52):
But there was a survey done recently of eight hundred
managers and executives in the US. Almost forty percent of
them admit they've avoided hiring recent college graduates in favor
of older employees instead.

Speaker 3 (50:06):
Really ages of work the other way, they.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
Say, because gen zers just aren't prepared for real life.

Speaker 3 (50:15):
In fact, what what recently graduated college student has ever
been prepared for real life? No matter what generation.

Speaker 1 (50:21):
One in five employers say they've had a recent college
graduate bring a parent along with them to the job interview.
They're just waiting out in the lobby for them to
be finished so they can give them a hug and say, honey,
you did so good and they totally nailed it.

Speaker 10 (50:39):
Now get a job and get out of my freaking house.

Speaker 1 (50:42):
Can you take me to lunch?

Speaker 14 (50:42):
Because I just.

Speaker 1 (50:44):
Over half of employers said gen zers struggle with eye
contact during their interviews.

Speaker 3 (50:52):
Yeah, Alexis doesn't like that even with their friends.

Speaker 4 (50:55):
Yeahs looking down at the floor right now.

Speaker 1 (50:57):
Others have asked for unreasonable compensation during the interview.

Speaker 3 (51:01):
For sure. It doesn't everyone make two hundred k after college.
I mean I thought that's what my professor told me.

Speaker 1 (51:07):
Now that seller sounds good.

Speaker 4 (51:08):
Can I get that all on a signing bonus?

Speaker 8 (51:10):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (51:10):
Most dress inappropriately for work.

Speaker 3 (51:15):
I mean the mid drift.

Speaker 1 (51:16):
They use inappropriate language.

Speaker 3 (51:19):
Management needs to change.

Speaker 15 (51:21):
Not yet, you should hire me because of my riz.

Speaker 1 (51:25):
And finally, sixty three employers say new college grads come
off as entitled and get super offended way too easily.

Speaker 3 (51:36):
Come on, give them a break. You know they're young.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
They don't know I just hope that they're not listening
to Laser Stories, which is guaranteed to offend the gen zs.
It's coming up right after this. It's the radio segment
that's taking the awkwardness out of One night Stands with
a new product called Eat a Sheet edible bed sheets

(52:03):
for the rando who spends the night at your place.

Speaker 3 (52:07):
I don't really get it now.

Speaker 1 (52:08):
It comes in three flavors nacho cheese, tapioca, and buttermilk ranch.
Wake up in the morning and eat a sheet with
that special someone.

Speaker 3 (52:19):
Hey, sorry, I can't leave it.

Speaker 1 (52:20):
I'm still working on You started that corner, I'll start
at this one. We'll meet in the middle last night.
It sounds almost as delicious as Laser Stories, the segment
where we read weird news stories around the globe, just
like everyone else does, except we've got a laser. Those
other mattress munchers just don't. This first Laser Story is
out of winter Park, Florida. Forty one year olds Paul

(52:44):
Kuriak recently stepped into his favorite Dunkin Donuts store when
the call of nature hit.

Speaker 3 (52:50):
Well, coffee will do that to you, yep, So.

Speaker 1 (52:52):
He stepped into the bathroom real quick and then the
unthinkable happened. As he was on the toilet. It explodes.
Did are talking? The toilet blew up him and the
restroom in well, yeah, exactly what you would think.

Speaker 11 (53:13):
Oh my god.

Speaker 8 (53:14):
What.

Speaker 1 (53:16):
Paul sat there and shocked for a couple of seconds,
and then with urine debris and worse all over him,
he bravely walked out of the restroom.

Speaker 3 (53:29):
What to order his donut and coffee?

Speaker 5 (53:32):
Imagine seeing that guy walk out of the bathroom being like, oh,
do not order food here?

Speaker 3 (53:36):
Could go in there?

Speaker 1 (53:38):
And he found the store's manager and asked for help,
but according to Paul, he was brushed off. They quickly
apologized and then they let him know they were aware
of the quote problem with the toilets, as it had
happened before.

Speaker 3 (53:54):
Wait it.

Speaker 15 (53:57):
That wasn't the first time the Duncan's toilet that exploded. Okay,
So Paul has now filed a lawsuit seeking more than
one hundred thousand dollars in damages because he says he
suffered severe and long term injuries due to the incident,
and more than that, he's required mental health care and
counseling just so that he can be brave enough to

(54:19):
use a public restroom again.

Speaker 3 (54:22):
He's never gonna go to a Duncan every again. I mean,
one hundred thousand dollars honestly sounds pretty low to me.
It sounds like he legit just.

Speaker 11 (54:30):
Needs some help.

Speaker 1 (54:31):
You you don't think it sounds legit.

Speaker 3 (54:32):
No, I think it does. Like it sounds legit to me.

Speaker 1 (54:35):
I don't know. I mean, the case is in court
and a retf for Duncan has not publicly responded to
the suit. As for the toilet, word is it's still
not working.

Speaker 3 (54:44):
Probably, but shud they finally put it sign.

Speaker 1 (54:46):
They put an out of order sign up on the door,
so it's not like they've done nothing. It's next to
not should.

Speaker 5 (54:52):
Feel like a little bomb symbolt.

Speaker 1 (54:55):
Enter at your own.

Speaker 3 (54:56):
Risk crime scene.

Speaker 1 (54:58):
This next Lazer story is out of Secret Ceremony.

Speaker 3 (55:01):
Central and we getn't know about it.

Speaker 1 (55:04):
Wedding venues are crazy expensive, so I'm surprised we don't
see this kind of thing more. Maybe it's a new
trend and we will start seeing more of it. But
a coffee shop in Indianapolis called Mansion Society is in
the news today after a couple held a pop up
wedding there and did not ask permission.

Speaker 3 (55:23):
What well, they just did it.

Speaker 1 (55:26):
They just showed up with thirty guests, didn't say anything,
and started the ceremony in one corner of the store.
It's kind of cool.

Speaker 3 (55:36):
Don't have any extra help and you're not putting up
any decorations.

Speaker 1 (55:39):
I guess they had an efficient there, and their photographer
told a barista to wait five minutes when they asked
them to please stop blocking the door.

Speaker 3 (55:49):
No hold on, they haven't just wait for him to
kiss the bride.

Speaker 1 (55:55):
The owners, who normally charged five hundred dollars for private
events there, say they didn't stop it from happening because
footage of them interrupting a wedding could go viral and
the Internet might cancel them.

Speaker 3 (56:08):
That's a good point, so we could do whatever we
want now. I mean, the five hundred dollars for a
wedding venue is not like, yeah, like fifty thousand dollars.

Speaker 1 (56:21):
Well, later, the coffee shop posted a video of it happening,
after initially deciding not to they didn't want to shame
the couple online, but eventually opted to post the footage
after the bride and groom refused to admit that they
had done anything.

Speaker 3 (56:33):
Wrong, money man, I mean they shut down the store, right,
they blocked the entrance.

Speaker 4 (56:39):
Give them like a hundred bucks.

Speaker 3 (56:41):
Everybody buy a coffee?

Speaker 4 (56:42):
Yeah, everybody has.

Speaker 1 (56:44):
Once the comments started rolling in, the bride was shamed
for not paying, and she offered two hundred dollars for
the event.

Speaker 3 (56:51):
Now we're negotiating. I think we're too late for that.

Speaker 1 (56:53):
Well, when they asked her for the full amount, she
called it unreasonable. So now people online are debating whether
it's sudden pop up wedding like this is really a
big deal or not because the whole thing only lasted
twenty minutes.

Speaker 3 (57:06):
Oh that's it, Okay, what they should do?

Speaker 4 (57:08):
They should go back and get a pop up divorce.

Speaker 3 (57:13):
I bet they didn't tell their guests of either. I
bet the guests are like, wait, yeah, I had no idea.

Speaker 1 (57:21):
The stories out of emoji lands. A recent poll of
one thousand employees asked them the name the most inappropriate
emojis to use at work? Can you guess what number
one is?

Speaker 8 (57:32):
Anybody?

Speaker 1 (57:32):
Egg?

Speaker 3 (57:33):
Plan?

Speaker 4 (57:33):
Probably a plan?

Speaker 1 (57:34):
Come on, Well, how you answer might depend on your age,
because for gen Z, it's the peach emoji, the one
that kind of looks like a butt.

Speaker 3 (57:42):
Yeah yeah, I thought that too.

Speaker 1 (57:45):
For millennial age people, it's the beer mug emoji is
inappropriate for work, inappropriate to be sharing around at work.

Speaker 3 (57:54):
Wouldn't you just say it like happy hour beer emoji?
Yeah yeah, no, okay.

Speaker 1 (57:58):
You want to get fired, go ahead. For gen Z people,
it's the egg plant.

Speaker 3 (58:04):
Oh wait, the first people were gen X. I always
get these mixed up.

Speaker 1 (58:08):
Gen Z is peach egg plant. Millennials are beer mug
gen X. Okay, okay, and then baby boomers think the
middle finger emoji is the most unprofessional one.

Speaker 3 (58:21):
That just means I was number one in sales. Number
one sign is that true.

Speaker 1 (58:26):
Baby boomers think that the middle finger emoji is most unprofessional.

Speaker 3 (58:29):
Bro, No, let's send them to my mom. Look, okay.

Speaker 1 (58:34):
The top answers for men and women were also different.
Women think the peach and egg plant emojis are the
most unprofessional. Men say the beer mug and kissing mark
emoji should not be allowed at work.

Speaker 3 (58:46):
Because the men aren't getting sent the egg plant the
peach emoji.

Speaker 8 (58:51):
You know.

Speaker 1 (58:52):
Yeah, the one that got the most votes overall was
the beer mug. So I guess talking about getting drunk
at work is still considered taboo. But we can send like.

Speaker 4 (59:02):
The red bite lip emoji.

Speaker 9 (59:03):
I would paint bottles fine, the wine glass spine, like
the spokes like the smoke puff is okay.

Speaker 1 (59:11):
Yeah, I just make a class. That's what we do.
But that's why this guy never sends emojis. He just
draws a big phallic symbol on every work note that
he sends around the office. No subtlety whatsoever. That means
Laser Stories has come to an end for the day.
We'll do it again, same time on.

Speaker 8 (59:28):
Friday, Brooking Jeffrey in the morning.

Speaker 1 (59:38):
Kelsey from Centralia is back after she has gone oh
and one against Brook. She says, the last time she played,
she knew all of the right answers, but she was
way too nervous and her brain shut off in the
middle of the game. Is that right, Kelsey?

Speaker 7 (59:55):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (59:57):
Sorry, Well, we don't want you to be nervous. I
want to help you relax. So can we get some soft,
spiritual relaxing music for you here? Oh Kelsey, I want
you to take it easy right now. Throw all the
cares and distresses that you have in your life away. Now,
reach into your purse and take out your credit card.

(01:00:18):
Read the numbers on that credit card. Hypnotize, don't forget
the CVV code and the expedition.

Speaker 10 (01:00:26):
This is this is going to soothe you. Are you
feeling soothe?

Speaker 7 (01:00:33):
Super helpful?

Speaker 1 (01:00:33):
Please, let's hear some numbers.

Speaker 10 (01:00:35):
Now, go ahead, do not tell my card number.

Speaker 1 (01:00:39):
Okay, you know what. If you don't want to relax,
then fine anymore, stick with good luck that we're gonna
send Brook out of the studio. And while that happens, Kelsey,
you know the game works. You got thirty seconds answer
as many questions as possible. If you don't know when,
you can say past. But you have to beat Brooke
outright to win? Are you ready?

Speaker 7 (01:00:57):
Yes?

Speaker 10 (01:00:57):
All right?

Speaker 1 (01:00:57):
Deep breath, relax. Time starts now. Today is National Pig Day.
True or false veal comes from a pig? False croissant
translates to what shape? In French question what manufacturer of
dental care products claims to be the brand? More dentists
use coldate name the constellation that's referred to as the Archer.

(01:01:26):
Joe Exotic is best known for starring in what famous
documentary Tiger Team? In Which city is South Beach, Florida?
Located South Beach? She's going with exactly the thing I said.
It's a bold strategy, Kelsey, and I like it. I
can tell you're relaxed. Brook's gonna come back in the

(01:01:46):
studio and I see on my phone screen or Kelsey,
I thought you were going to have a relaxing place
to go on a trip. But you're not going on
a trip, but you're saving for Disney. Yes, we're just
waiting till next year because my son's only three this year,
so we'reing away from a little bit.

Speaker 3 (01:01:59):
I have to wait a little bit longer. They can't
go on any so well, my daughter's nine this year,
so you have to do that too long?

Speaker 1 (01:02:07):
Ye, that window, with the amount of money that you
have to save, it's probably going to take you like
fifteen years. Okay, you get one ride. He's thirty years
old and he finally gets to go because all right, Brook,
your turn. You're ready, Yeah, I'm ready. Your time starts now.
Today is National pig Day. True or false veal comes

(01:02:29):
from a pig. False croissant translates to what shape in
French crescent. What manufacturer of dental care products claims to
be the brand? More dentists use name the constellation that's
referred to as the archer.

Speaker 3 (01:02:45):
Oh gosh Oriyan.

Speaker 1 (01:02:47):
Joe Exotic is best known for starring in what famous
documentary series.

Speaker 3 (01:02:51):
What is It Called Pass?

Speaker 1 (01:02:54):
In which start of the question, you don't think that
which city South Beach, Florida located?

Speaker 3 (01:03:00):
South Beach is in Florida?

Speaker 1 (01:03:01):
Wow, was terrible South Beach. I didn't think we could
get worse than Kelsea's answer.

Speaker 3 (01:03:07):
We heard, Broke mumbled through the question.

Speaker 1 (01:03:10):
We're gonna go to the scoreboard and see what a
train wreck this really was with j.

Speaker 5 (01:03:16):
Do you, Kelsey, was your brain unclogged today?

Speaker 4 (01:03:20):
Were you relaxed? I would say, yeah, you got three correct?

Speaker 3 (01:03:23):
Oh that's pretty good, better than last time. And Brooke
it's Miami. It is Miami. Bites the dost me down?

Speaker 1 (01:03:38):
And Kelsea, congratulations on taken down. Brooke, you like that.

Speaker 7 (01:03:43):
I feel so much better. I got zero last time.

Speaker 1 (01:03:47):
Let's go over the answers for everybody. It's national pig
dave vel comes from a pig. That's false. It comes
from a cow. Croissant translates to crescent in French. Never
knew that as a crescent shaped appears, it makes so
much sense. The manufactor sure of dental care products that
claims to be the brand more dentists used is not Colgate.
It's Oral b No. So clearly that slogan is not

(01:04:09):
doing that any world.

Speaker 3 (01:04:11):
Dennis probably know.

Speaker 1 (01:04:12):
The constellation referred to as the Archer is Sagittarius because
it's shaped like an archer. Joe Exotic, best known for
starring in The Tiger Kane Brook and the city that
South Beach, Florida is located and.

Speaker 3 (01:04:25):
Play the tape back we will, I said city.

Speaker 1 (01:04:29):
It would be in the city of Miami. So Kelsey, congratulations.
Not only do you get one hundred dollars, but you
got some Brook and Jeffrey swag to take home.

Speaker 7 (01:04:38):
Nice, awesome, Thank you all.

Speaker 1 (01:04:40):
Right, put the spiritual music back on you're feeling.

Speaker 4 (01:04:46):
Now, pull your credit card out.

Speaker 1 (01:04:49):
Of cash and slid it across the table to your
good friend Jeffrey.

Speaker 4 (01:04:53):
Oh, she's handing me up.

Speaker 1 (01:04:56):
It always works. Thank you for playing, Kelsey. We'll be
back do Win Brooks Buck same time tomorrow

Speaker 8 (01:05:02):
Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.