April 4, 2024 • 50 mins
FULL SHOW: Thursday, April 4th, 2024
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I always tell people that this show won't make you smarter,
but it should make you laugh, all right, So yeah,
enjoy the full show. It starts right now.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Has our show finally hit the big time?
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Really?
Speaker 2 (00:12):
It's broken? Jeffrey in the morning. I'm not even talking
about having close to seven hundred thousand TikTok followers.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
That's pretty impressive, thanks everyone.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
I mean it's really not that impressive. My mom has
over eight hundred thousand. Sure, mom, I'm not talking about
Brooke launching her own successful side podcast called how to
Start your Own Third World Sweatshop with less than one
hundred k and that's taken off.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Yeah, we interview the children. That was dark.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I'm sorry he's by sustainable.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
But in maybe the biggest news of all for our show,
we just found out that our own Alexis Fuller got
accepted onto the exclusive top tier VIP dating app.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Yea, yeah, this was if you could start dating a
celebrity and make some tabloids, would be really helpful for us.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Let's loose celebrity term on there. Obviously they let.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
You in, So I don't think Alexis you realize the
greatness that you have achieved here. This is something you
see contestants on The Bachelor trying to get on a list.
Actors have used Rayah before. Alexis, you know this isn't
just about you getting onto the end. This is about us.
Now we need to use this as a marketing tool
(01:29):
for our show. What do you think about posting the
top loser line of the week on your dating profile?
More beautiful and famous people listening.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
You don't think they're going to allow that on there's
always suspended.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Screen grab.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Your plan is just to use this to marry a Hemsworth.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
I don't want to marry him, Jeff.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
The most forgettable Jonas brother, phil or Luke or whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Nobody wants a Jonas brother.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
You have to stop being so selfish, Alexis and think
of the show first. We can say this what you're
doing at the Prince of Mumbai's Grand Palace once with him?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
I mean that'd be better than our local events.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
I kind of liked what you doing to the bus stop.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
This show is on an upward trajectory. Thank you, Alexis.
Now let's move on and get back into the shock
collar question of the day with our own star of
the show. Sort of.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
Thanks Joe sounded very genuine. Yeah, his name is Digital Jake.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
You're a start of my mom, Jake.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
He's too good for riots. Take it away, Jake.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
His movies have grossed over fourteen billion dollars worldwide.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Whoa.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
He was named Time magazine sixty seventh most Influential person
of two thousand and eight seven. And he's the only
human being that can rock a go tea better than
Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
It's the Prince of Mumbai.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Wait, why does Santa have a goateee?
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Some call him Sherlock Holmes, some call him iron Man,
but we know him as Robert Downey Junior. And today's birthday.
But did you know he shares it with another even
more famous celebrity who in their career had an estimated
net worth of ninety nine million dollars before they passed
(03:19):
away in twenty nineteen. Oh my god, I'm talking about
the one, the only Tartar Sauce aka Grumpy Cat.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Oh, it's a birthday Cat, And.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
To celebrate these two legends of entertainment and their shared birthday.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Fee Cat and Robert Downey June.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
That's right, Brooks, say it again. We're gonna play a
special Robert Downey Versus Grumpy Kitty edition of plenty of twenty.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Please tell me it's one of those who said it.
Where you read a quote, we have to guess.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
We'll go around the room and you give me a
number one through twenty and I'll read you a title
and you have to tell me if it's the name
of a Grumpy Cat video or a Robert Downey Junior film.
Guess correctly, and you stay in the game. This is
so We'll start with the woman who has a shirtless
photo of Grumpy Cat up in her cubicles, and that's Alexis.
(04:12):
Even the cats, I've never seen a shirt full photo real. Alexis,
give me a number one through twenty. Please ten, number
ten too much? Son? Was that a Grumpy Cat video
title or Robert Downey Junior movie?
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Game?
Speaker 1 (04:28):
This is the game.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
This is the game. This has always been the game.
And you better rise the occasion.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Grumpy Cat got a little grumpy when he.
Speaker 4 (04:36):
Was out, Alexis said, Grumpy Cat, that is correct. That's
a nineteen ninety one our DJ philm are you. I
would never lie about Robert Downey Junior versus Grumpy Is
It just hid been sunburn film After what it's actually
a multimillionaire is making out his will and his gay
(04:58):
son and his daughter a lesi in yet he vows
to leave his fortune to the first one who can
produce a grandchild.
Speaker 6 (05:03):
Oh wow, wow's sun.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
But it's a playoff. Is there too much? You'll never know?
Tell you watch it, Alexis, you're out embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Let's move over to Jose.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
Give me number one through twenty please.
Speaker 7 (05:19):
I'm gonna go twelve. I love that number.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
Jose, this is a hard one. Oh no, grump of Thrones.
Speaker 5 (05:25):
No?
Speaker 4 (05:27):
Is that a grumpy Cat clip or a Downy Junior flick?
Speaker 6 (05:31):
Okay, but imagine after iron Man dies, Robert Downey Junior
is like, you know, has a new career.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
It's a grum wait iron Man.
Speaker 7 (05:39):
Oh spoiler alert.
Speaker 4 (05:40):
Sorry, it could.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Have been like one of those like side passion projects
that the actors like to do after they do like
a big blockbuster film, they like to do an indie
movie that like speaks more to their soul.
Speaker 7 (05:51):
And now I am.
Speaker 6 (05:53):
I'm gonna say this is a grumpy Cat extravaganza.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
Jose said, grumpy Cat. That is correct. Ten years ago
they put him on the actual throwne the Iron Throne
from Game of Thrones and you know what, Grumby Cat
he didn't like classic.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Somebody needs to write the movie though Thrones and cast
Robert Downey Jr.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
In it.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Let's go to Brook Brooki me number one through twenty seven. Brook,
your title is back to School? Is that a Grumpy
Cat video or a Robert Downey Junior movie.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
That sounds like a terrible comedy where.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
He's the father or the janitor that gives advice to all.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
The or it's like a playoff of Billy Madison where
he's like going back to school. Right, Robert Downey Junior
did a lot of questionable films, but I can also
see Grumby Cat a little backpack on, just.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Really upset about his first day.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Of came But I'm gonna stick with RDJ.
Speaker 4 (06:50):
WHOA Brooks said Robert Downey Junior. That is correct. It's
actually booth Oh, the nineteen eighty six comedy starring r.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
E J.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
And his dad Rodney Dangerfield when they attend the same college.
And then in twenty twelve, grumpy Cat, equipped with a
tiny backpack, makes his way to a local school following
a trail of chicken and liver Cat trees.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
So I got both plots right, Yeah, you.
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Kind of did, Jeffrey, you gotta get this one right
or Robert Downey Junior and Grumpy Cat is over forever, Jeffrey,
give me number one through twenty please thirteen, Jeffery, your
title is rented lips. Was that a Robert Downey Junior
movie or a Grumpy Cat video?
Speaker 6 (07:31):
I hope this one's a Robert Downy to follow up
to the pre movie.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Have you seen the mouth on that grumpy Cat. He's
got like down like you focus right in on that mouth,
and I would rent those lips.
Speaker 4 (07:44):
Frown.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
I picture him with those wax lips. Yeah, get wax lips.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
On the mind immediately went to grumpy Cat on that
give me.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Grumpy Cat, jeff said, grumpy Cat, that is incorrect. That's
a nineteen eighty eight Robert Downey Junior film where two
friends are given the chance to cree their passion project,
a musical on Indian farming. That means you've won this
edition of Plenty of Plenty from Kennedy Brown.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
So Jose gets to choose who gets shocked, and they're
going to be singing Promiscuous by Nelly for time.
Speaker 7 (08:15):
I don't know who I want to get shocked? Can
I choose myself? Yeah, this is for you, grubby.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
Cat bro shock me okay from.
Speaker 7 (08:23):
Misuse cat you will.
Speaker 4 (08:28):
I'm glad you stopped that happened.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
That's your shock collar question of the day.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Fifteen to twenty years ago, there was a middle school
kid who was running probably one of the first ever
internet scams, a middle school kid, and you may have
been a victim of it. Oh, up until this point,
he's never told anyone about this, But after you hear it,
you might think, dang, that could be the smartest middle
(08:59):
school kid ever. And he owes me my two hundred
bucks back. Wait what you're gonna hear it? In a
brand new mass speaker that's coming up.
Speaker 8 (09:09):
You don't hear me?
Speaker 4 (09:11):
Concession. I can't take back earl arms.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
Little mouse speaker got a text to seventy eight five
nine two says I just witnessed my wife of fourteen
years slice up a banana using scissors, and I don't
know if I'll ever recover from that mental image.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
I want to try it, don't I used?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
No, dude, kitchen scissors are money. I use it to
cut up chicken breast.
Speaker 5 (09:38):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
It's so good. It's a good PSA at all the wives.
Don't scissor your husband's bananas. Okay. We learn all sorts
of important lessons on this segment of what not to
do in your life. I'm supposed to do that.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
You may say it differently.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
Maybe we'll learn a new lesson from today's guest caller,
who's chosen to go by Jason as his alias. So, Jason,
welcome to the show.
Speaker 9 (10:00):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Hello, how are you doing? Jason?
Speaker 4 (10:04):
Good?
Speaker 5 (10:04):
Good god?
Speaker 1 (10:05):
How are you okay? I mean, even with the voice changer,
you seem pretty chill.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Yeah, voice changer is on for it. You're the mass speaker. Now,
whenever you're ready, we want to hear your confession.
Speaker 9 (10:14):
All right. So, back when I was in like the
seventh grade, I was, uh, I was kind of an
internet camera.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
You just dropped that castle. I mean you're a twelve
year old internet scammer? Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (10:31):
Yeah, yeah, it was an inn camera.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Why are you so casual about this?
Speaker 5 (10:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (10:37):
I mean I was thinking about three hundred dollars a month.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (10:42):
What was the scam you were running.
Speaker 9 (10:45):
Well, I mean back then, like I go to the
website Nickelodeon dot com. Yeah, and they had this game
called nick Tropolis. Okay, they said, what Ukraine an avatar
build a house, furnish it even you.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Won't okay, just interact. Look did you play this, Selexis?
I don't know. It sounded familiar.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I thought it kind of sounds like the Sims, but
like a kid's version of that. Yeah.
Speaker 9 (11:10):
Yeah, and there was these options about nice of furniture TVs.
Speaker 6 (11:15):
Okay, okay, I will say, because I'm a big Fortnite guy,
when you buy a rare skin, kids know, they're like,
oh my gosh, you have.
Speaker 7 (11:24):
The Dark Night from season.
Speaker 4 (11:27):
Yeah, so I can see you.
Speaker 7 (11:29):
Find a rare couch and people being like.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Oh damn.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
It's funny how in this game you could be like
a little bougie Seventh.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
I don't understand where the skim comes in though, so
you you play and what.
Speaker 9 (11:44):
It comes So back then, you know, if you forget
your password to your account, one of the security questions
you could choose was what is your eye color?
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Okay okay, and.
Speaker 9 (11:54):
If you got it right, it would tell you your
past were right there? Oh right, well yeah, so I
decided to use that information for my own benefits.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
What hell.
Speaker 9 (12:05):
So in the game, I go to popular locations in
nick Tropolis and I just write down random people's use
the name, so I thought, and I log out type in.
Speaker 10 (12:16):
To use the name.
Speaker 9 (12:18):
Each of them had a security questions that to.
Speaker 5 (12:21):
What is the eye color?
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Oh? You just gall I mean I would assume everybody's brown.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Pople at brown Eyes is all right, you get into it,
you're getting done.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Oh, we're almost as smart as the twelve.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Year old you.
Speaker 9 (12:35):
Yeah, most of us had eye colors.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
The question the easiest one.
Speaker 6 (12:42):
Yeah, because you don't have you know, what was your
you know, great ants, middle or your first job one.
Speaker 9 (12:49):
Se see y'all, see, y'all kitching all.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
You're kitching on.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
Okay, so you've hacked into their nick Tropolis account. Now
what what do you do with that?
Speaker 7 (12:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (12:57):
Okay, So when I'm in there and I would go
to that houses, yeah, basically I raise them.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
You would raise their virtual house.
Speaker 10 (13:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 9 (13:06):
Yeah, no, So I sent all of this furniture and
decorations to my.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Account you can gift to other people.
Speaker 7 (13:14):
Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
So, I mean that sucks, But like, where does the
three hundred dollars come in? How are you making three
hundred dollars a month on this?
Speaker 9 (13:23):
Well, you have to go to the store in the game.
But I can say I don't say I quote.
Speaker 5 (13:28):
Unquote purchased myself.
Speaker 9 (13:32):
So I'm taking those things and I took from the
other people, and I'm reselling them at a lower price.
Speaker 6 (13:38):
All people do this in baseball games where they they
get stubs and they resell.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Them in the video game.
Speaker 7 (13:45):
Yeah, in the video game abundance of things, and it
turns into like.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
That's kind of this would not fly on Club Penguin.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Let me wait, this big screen TV looks exactly like
the one that was stolen from my house.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Wait did you ever get caught by any of the users?
Did they call you out?
Speaker 9 (14:04):
No? No, it's surprised and they never got cout.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
The beauty of the early days of like Nickelodeon, dot
com and it's just.
Speaker 7 (14:11):
A small crime.
Speaker 6 (14:12):
Imagine going to your mom and crying, like, mom, someone
took all the furniture in the video game.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
Are they going to kid?
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (14:20):
Good luck?
Speaker 1 (14:22):
Wow, So you were you were a burglar?
Speaker 7 (14:26):
Burglar?
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Yeah, why do you sound so happy about it, like
you're admitting to scamming all these like poor little kids
out of their accounts.
Speaker 9 (14:36):
I mean that I needed but it was funny.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
Oh, it's so funny.
Speaker 9 (14:46):
But I think it hit me in real life. Now
I'm a used car.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
No old stuff. You're not stealing those cars that you're
selling first, right the question?
Speaker 1 (14:59):
No? No, no, okay, somebody else is he buys him
with a board?
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Okay, Well, thanks for that confession. I'm a little bit
scared to talk to you, but text in seven eight,
five nine too. If you have a confession you've been
holding on to, will hide your identity, mask your voice,
and make you the next mass speaker.
Speaker 5 (15:17):
Your phone TAP's coming up next, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
In today's prank, two roommates have been living in a
house together, and after a whole year, one finally convinced
the other to hire a professional house cleaner. Really really, now.
The guy we're about to call never wanted anybody to
come over to his place. He was worried that they'd
steal stuff or rearrange things in a weird way because
he never had one growing up, so he was very,
(15:43):
very wary, with good reason. Though, because his roommate listens
to our show and called us with a wild idea, saying,
let's have Brooke be the house cleaner who's stuck in
a dark room and can't find her way out. Yep,
you're gonna hear it in your phone. Tap right Now's
Mornings on the twenty.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Hello, Hi, Trevor, Trevor.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
Speaking.
Speaker 11 (16:10):
How can I help you?
Speaker 5 (16:11):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Hi, I'm a I'm the housekeeper you hired for today.
Speaker 11 (16:16):
Oh oh hey, how you doing?
Speaker 7 (16:18):
Probably to call my roommate you're the one that hired you.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Yeah, well I tried to call him. He didn't answer,
and I'm sorry. I just I need some help.
Speaker 3 (16:30):
Help with what? How can I help you?
Speaker 7 (16:33):
You know what?
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Funny thing happened to me? So I'm in a room
and I I can't get out.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
You're in a room that you can't get out.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
Where are you at?
Speaker 11 (16:44):
You're on the first floor.
Speaker 3 (16:45):
No, I'm up on the second floor and it's just
so dark and I can't find the light switch anywhere.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
So wait, you're you're the house cleaner and you're went
into a room where there was no lights.
Speaker 3 (16:58):
And you could just let me know, like light switches
usually left wall, right, wall in the middle.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
What was that?
Speaker 1 (17:10):
What was what? Didn't hear anything?
Speaker 10 (17:13):
I heard it Lloyd's room?
Speaker 3 (17:15):
Are you in, Like I said, I'd love to tell you,
but I can't see it.
Speaker 7 (17:21):
Real problem.
Speaker 3 (17:22):
I'm just I'm kind of like putting my hands out
and feeling along that.
Speaker 10 (17:29):
What are you doing.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
I'm just trying to get out of here. There's anything
valuable around here? Do you?
Speaker 2 (17:35):
I don't know if you're in my room or not,
but like you can just easily just open the drape
that way you can just see, you know, have some light.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
That's a great idea. I did not think of that.
Now I just need to find which.
Speaker 12 (17:48):
Oh my god, what there.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Was just something in the middle of the floor. That's weird,
right to keep things in.
Speaker 7 (17:56):
The middle of the floor.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
Knocking over my well.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
I don't know if it's your stuff.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
I can't see anything, so, I mean, it's amazing. I
could hold my hand in front of my face. I
got nothing. If I swing my arm around me.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
I just thought if I swung that way, it'd be fine.
But maybe if I just swing the other way.
Speaker 12 (18:22):
This is what I did not want him to get a.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Oh man, this is gonna be a lot of cleaning.
I don't know what my company, what.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Kind of quote they gave you, but they take me
another hour or so.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
What are you doing just trying to.
Speaker 8 (18:41):
Find a light switch, a drake?
Speaker 4 (18:45):
Oh my.
Speaker 7 (18:47):
Bugger.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
At this point, I think you're just you're just purposely making.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Okay, listen, listen, I hear you. But good news. I
don't want to lose good news. I found my vacuum.
I've got it right here.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (19:11):
I say, this is a big.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Room, this is a.
Speaker 4 (19:17):
Whatever you're doing, let me ask.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
You a question that's totally unrelated. How's your insurance like
Runner's insurance?
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Are you saying that because you broke all my.
Speaker 8 (19:29):
Out?
Speaker 5 (19:30):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (19:30):
Man, that was on my knee out.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
You know, it's interesting that you're not worried about me
in this situation, because you're.
Speaker 12 (19:39):
The one that's wiping everything thats walking around the house.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
I'm pretty sure most of this stuff was broken when
I got here.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Did you want a big party last night?
Speaker 4 (19:50):
Oh? My god?
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Now that one that one I dropped.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Oh my god, I'm gonna call my room right now
and tell him.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Actually, you know, I forgot to mention at the beginning
when I was looking.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Around here that I have already talked to him.
Speaker 4 (20:06):
Eric.
Speaker 3 (20:08):
Him, Yeah, yeah, I talked to him when he set
you up for this prank phone call.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
What oh god, Yeah, that's actually our studio. This is
actually Brook for Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. We're
doing a phone tap on you. Those sound effects.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
God, did you really think I was a house cleaner
that couldn't find a life switch?
Speaker 2 (20:32):
I thought everything that I owned wind Oh, oh my god.
Speaker 4 (20:38):
That's so nervous that that one.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Was your television. But I'm sure you have a warranty
I do, but still.
Speaker 5 (20:45):
Oh my god, wake every morning with slow tap weekday
mornings on the twenties Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
In a new relationship, there's all sorts of little things
that can give you the ICKND like if they part
their hair the same way your dog does, is right
in half, or if after every kiss they giggle and
in a baby voice say do it again, mama, Yeah,
(21:17):
you know, coming back from those. That's why one of
our listeners needs our help today because she's been dating
this great guy and the one thing that might be
giving him the ick is the awkward text exchanges that
they've been having. And like just this morning, she got
a message she has no idea how to respond to.
So we're gonna try and step in and help her
(21:39):
out with a brand new textual healing coming up.
Speaker 8 (21:45):
I like it.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Text you will, then text you will needless to say.
This morning show has many many skins using our fingers,
pencil tricks, tummy tickles, me and Jose pinching our noses
when we pass by Brooks lunch. We are very very
good with our fingers.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
You can spell cauliflowers so much. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
Yeah, it's not pleasant, especially when you put it in
the microwaves.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Yes, with spinach.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
But you know what, maybe our best finger skill is texting,
and we have to help our listeners come up to
our level with this segment called textual Healing, where we
help somebody with their texting conversation when they don't quite
know what to say. And today's honored guest who needs
some tender textual healing is Dory. So let's welcome Dory
to the show.
Speaker 10 (22:44):
How you doing, tie, everybody?
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Are you hungry? You want some lunch? I'll give you some?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Yeah, say no, say no.
Speaker 11 (22:57):
Ye.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Story. You reached out for us because you need help
with some texting. Who are we going to be texting today?
Speaker 10 (23:06):
Yes, you guys, I met this guy and we've been
going out three or four weeks.
Speaker 12 (23:13):
It's not exclusive.
Speaker 10 (23:15):
We haven't had the exclusive talk. But in real life,
I really really like him.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
In virtual life, do you like him too?
Speaker 12 (23:26):
Not so much?
Speaker 10 (23:31):
No, in texting life, it's a problem. The thing is,
when we're together, it's great, I have no issues.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
I really like.
Speaker 10 (23:38):
Him again, But when it comes to texting, we're off.
Speaker 7 (23:43):
Really really, I know exactly what you mean.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Maybe he's just not I mean, I feel like there's
a lot of people out there that don't know how
to keep a conversation going on text.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
Is that what it is? Does it feel like you
text him and then things just stop?
Speaker 10 (23:56):
I'm just not sure what it is.
Speaker 12 (23:59):
It's really not vibing.
Speaker 10 (24:00):
It's like it's so different from how we are when
we're together.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Like, do you have an example of like how you're
texting is in meshing with each other?
Speaker 5 (24:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 10 (24:11):
Actually I do. So. One time he texted me and
he said, when you come over later, the neighbor's kids
have challenged us to a water fight.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Okay, that's cute.
Speaker 12 (24:26):
That is cute, right, right?
Speaker 10 (24:28):
That was a cute text, and so I texted back,
I said, oh, that sounds like fun I'm.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
In Yeah, that's a good response, square gut emoji.
Speaker 10 (24:37):
And then he texted, should I wait for you to
boil the water? Oh?
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Wait, he's gonna pour boiling water on the neighbor children.
It's funny, right, yeah.
Speaker 12 (24:51):
I mean I was confused. I was like what, and
then he was just like, oh, he was just joking.
Speaker 10 (24:58):
But that's an example I'm trying to say of why
it's off in real life.
Speaker 12 (25:03):
I don't seem to have that confusion.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
In real life.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
You get jokes on you where you could see your
water boiling in real life. That way, there's no question.
Speaker 7 (25:13):
This is a thing. You have bad text chemistry.
Speaker 4 (25:16):
Usually if you talk.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
About this a lot, they'll say is that a bad thing?
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Though?
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Is it like bad for a relationship?
Speaker 7 (25:22):
You know, excited to text him?
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Like are you worried about but you're doing You're not
gonna text all day anyway? That's true.
Speaker 10 (25:28):
I mean I am a little bit worried about it
because it sets a dynamic off like I don't know
to go forward or what.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Okay, So you you feel like every time that you
guys do a text conversation, it's like subtracting from your
relationship in real life. So where are you at right
now in your convo with him via text?
Speaker 10 (25:49):
It's still confusing to me, Like, actually, today he texted
me something. That's why I'm calling you, guys. I don't
know how to respond.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Okay, So I sent him with let me.
Speaker 12 (26:00):
Read it to you.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Okay.
Speaker 10 (26:02):
I said, Hey, that computer that you let me borrow,
do you know how much ram it has?
Speaker 2 (26:11):
Okay?
Speaker 7 (26:12):
It sounds like a bad pick up life.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Do you let you borrow a computer?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 12 (26:15):
Well he let me a computer.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Okay.
Speaker 13 (26:18):
It was a really serious question I needed to.
Speaker 10 (26:20):
Know for downloading or whatever.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Okay.
Speaker 10 (26:23):
So I was serious about it, and he responded, you guys,
he said, sorry, I don't know. It was a friend
of mine and he's dead.
Speaker 11 (26:34):
Now.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
Wow, okay, how do you read that?
Speaker 7 (26:42):
Very dark?
Speaker 10 (26:43):
I don't know what to think.
Speaker 13 (26:45):
I mean, I didn't respond or text back because I
don't know whether to make a joke. If he was joking,
you know, if it's really true, then I might say
something that's insensitive to a dead man.
Speaker 5 (27:00):
Yeah. Help.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
So we're responding back to this text with you right
now about his friend, we're possibly dying?
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Yes, okay, can you just right back? Are you serious? Question?
Speaker 2 (27:12):
Markers sounds kind of cold and heartless. I think that
no matter what happens, especially early on in a relationship,
you want to keep things as light and as playful
as possible.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
You mentioned a friend, but maybe.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
But he was joking about the water balloons and boiling
water on top of children. His sense of humor is
a little bit different.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
So what if you.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
Write back and you say, uh, oh is this computer cursed?
Speaker 2 (27:35):
Okay, no, no, no.
Speaker 7 (27:37):
If he's dark, you gotta go darker?
Speaker 6 (27:38):
Be like, how did you kill him?
Speaker 7 (27:42):
How did you murder your friend?
Speaker 1 (27:43):
That curse was dark enough?
Speaker 2 (27:45):
What about what if you said, how about we get
out the Ouiji board and ask him?
Speaker 7 (27:51):
That's dark?
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Stry? What do you think? I have lots of options
to choose from.
Speaker 6 (27:56):
There, none of them are being normal at this point, though,
you have to get back with a dark song.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
Well, she didn't come to us for a normal response
to be like, oh sorry, we need a fun, playful response.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
You want a saance to talk to the friend to
figure out them.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
I mean that's acknowledging what he said. It's joking back
in a not mean way. What do you think, Torri?
Speaker 10 (28:18):
I do like where you're coming from, So I feel
like I could say something like, well, can we have
a sayance so we can find out.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
Okay, I like that.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
You could use that crystal ball emoji.
Speaker 3 (28:30):
Oh yeah, whatever, but whatever, the message will come through
either way.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
Why don't you Why don't you type that out and
send it to your your new guy friend here.
Speaker 12 (28:44):
I'm want to do it right now, you guys, Okay,
you have.
Speaker 7 (28:48):
To do it right now.
Speaker 2 (28:48):
That's the.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Name.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
We didn't ask for his name.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Okay, need it?
Speaker 12 (28:55):
Okay right now?
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Yeah, I don't want to distract her and ruin the
text laughing.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
Okay, she makes so funny?
Speaker 7 (29:02):
Is funny?
Speaker 12 (29:04):
All right, I'm gonna send it.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
All right, let's do it.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
And okay, all.
Speaker 7 (29:11):
Right, there's no way he's like, actually, my friend does
haunt me.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
It couldn't come back to this Friday, so that works
out perfectly.
Speaker 7 (29:21):
But this is fun enough.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
We've laid the groundwork for a nice, playful conversation for
the rest of the way. We're gonna come back and
see if he responds to that.
Speaker 5 (29:29):
For the other.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Friend, what's his name? Who are we texting? Andre Andre.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
We'll see if Andre responds and we continue textual healing
right after this. We're in the middle of textual healing
with our listener Dory, and normally we get a lot
of relationship stuff on this segment about how to text
your crush or the ups guy, how to text Brooks
husband to get him out of the house so Roy
the traveling salesman can come over, but a.
Speaker 7 (29:59):
Lot of excuses for that.
Speaker 3 (30:00):
Yeah, the text with Roy is fine, though, Yeah, I'm
kidding any if you're listening, there's no This.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Is a little bit different though, because Dorry needs our
help texting the guy that she's just started dating. All
their in person chemistry is off the charts, it's just
when they're on the phone texting it can get a
little bit rocky and they can't tell when the other
person is joking or not.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
Oh my god, you know, I still don't fully know either.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
Yeah, that's why she emailed us today, because she was
asking him over text about a computer that she borrowed
and how much ram it has. He responded with, I
don't know. That computer belonged to my dead friend. So
that put us at an interesting fork in the road.
Do we take that seriously or assume that it was
a joke.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
I mean, like Alexis said, this is why emojis were invented.
Speaker 1 (30:47):
He needs them.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
He joked before with a previous text. So we went
down that road again and wrote back, well, maybe we
should do a seance to find out. Yeah, trying to
be played. Yeah, and I'm thinking, like, after we did it,
I'm worried, like, did we really do that? That's a
little bit it is a little bit dangerous.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
We can apologize.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
I am interested to see if Andre has replied to it, dorry,
Have you gotten any word back?
Speaker 5 (31:15):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (31:17):
Oh no?
Speaker 1 (31:17):
What did he say?
Speaker 10 (31:19):
Okay? He said, oh snap, do you believe in that too?
We should one hundred percent emoji do a seance for
our next date.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
Okay, okay, he continues.
Speaker 10 (31:36):
If he responds, you're gonna love him. He's a great guy.
Speaker 7 (31:43):
Yeah, that's what I'm worried.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
How do you how do you read that door? Do
you think he's joking back or is he being serious?
Speaker 5 (31:49):
Now?
Speaker 10 (31:50):
I think he believes in ghosts?
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Where do you stand on that belief? Are you down
having a seance with your new boyfriend?
Speaker 7 (31:59):
She's not gonna have a really saying.
Speaker 3 (32:01):
Does mean that it actually is the friend's laptop and
the friends did see.
Speaker 7 (32:04):
I'm one hundred percent on the joking side.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
People.
Speaker 7 (32:08):
People want to joke around NonStop, like me, never stop.
That's why it says non stop, Brook, he just took
it too far exactly. He's not gonna stop.
Speaker 2 (32:16):
I don't know if he is, because if he'd sent
the text without mentioning the friends specifically, then I would
think it's a joke. But the fact that he's bringing
up his friend might mean that that's serious.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
And then you're going to meet him. I think he
thinks you're going to meet him. It should be cool.
That's a step in a relationship. Friends.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
Is it a little bit too soon to be meeting
the dead? Friends?
Speaker 5 (32:41):
Okay?
Speaker 7 (32:42):
Okay, now meet Grandma. Let's find her relatives.
Speaker 12 (32:45):
You guys, I'm so worried now, I mean, what do
I say?
Speaker 3 (32:49):
Okay, Okay, Now we gotta legitimately find out if this
is a joke or not?
Speaker 6 (32:54):
Right?
Speaker 5 (32:55):
Do we need to do that?
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Brook?
Speaker 5 (32:56):
Well?
Speaker 1 (32:57):
What else do we do?
Speaker 3 (32:57):
We just keep on the road and we don't know
whether we should show up on Friday night.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
The trains in motion, don't jump in front and try
to stop it.
Speaker 7 (33:05):
Now keep joking.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Why do you say this? What do you say?
Speaker 2 (33:08):
This?
Speaker 1 (33:08):
Truth is it'd be my first seance. What should I
bring to that type of date?
Speaker 7 (33:13):
What do I wear?
Speaker 2 (33:15):
I just doesn't like it? Now?
Speaker 7 (33:17):
Is being polite?
Speaker 2 (33:18):
She always says, totally.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
Want to know what you need to know? Like do
you bring a bottle of wine? Do you need to
wear a black dress?
Speaker 9 (33:26):
Like?
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Where are we at?
Speaker 2 (33:27):
Are you actually open to a seance here? Dorri for real?
Speaker 10 (33:31):
Not really?
Speaker 2 (33:34):
But maybe there's a way we can joke in back home.
Speaker 10 (33:36):
I really, I really like you guys response.
Speaker 12 (33:38):
That's truth.
Speaker 10 (33:39):
It'll be my first seance.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
What should I bring?
Speaker 10 (33:42):
I like?
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Now you do? Okay, then just send that. Let's just
send it, okay, you guys.
Speaker 12 (33:49):
I've texted, okay, texted it, and now.
Speaker 7 (33:51):
We'll only I think be able to tell from this text.
Speaker 6 (33:53):
Because if he says wear something nice and be respectful
for the.
Speaker 7 (33:57):
Dead, then you'll know he's serious. If he's like a
bunny costume.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Then you know he's go to a pet cemetery and
dig up a dead animal. We meet the bones from it.
Speaker 12 (34:07):
You guys, you guys, he touched it back.
Speaker 2 (34:11):
Okay, that was really quick for a geez. He's really
excited about this.
Speaker 10 (34:16):
He said, Oh, are you serious? That could be a
deal breaker for me.
Speaker 3 (34:23):
Doing it or not doing it, no asking, no admitting
that it's her first time.
Speaker 10 (34:28):
That or or me being into it is a deal breaker.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
I don't know why. Yeah, just say I was joking
and just leave it at that, and then and then
he can decide what the joke was.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Can we joke back and say, like, oh, thank god,
because I was worried I was gonna fall in love
with your dead friend, or you.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
Were worried his friend was going to hit on you.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
I mean, because remember, like our mission here is just
to try and connect with Andre this guy that she's.
Speaker 1 (35:08):
Texting, and it is off still it is.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
Well, we're talking too much about Andrea's possibly dead friends.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
I like, I like your joke. I think your joke's funny. Okay,
like I do.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
I liked your version of it, though a little bit
better than mine.
Speaker 1 (35:21):
Oh okay, I was worried that he was going to
hit on me anyway.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
Yeah, ghosts have a thing for me, So I was
worried he was going to fall in love with me anyway.
What you're showing by by doing that is that you're
like a light, playful person. You don't take things too seriously.
You're just trying to like have a good time with him, right.
Speaker 10 (35:39):
I'm not being judgmental or yeah, let's just send that.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Maybe you can put a laugh emoji on the end
because it's a little ghosts it's a joke.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
Yeah, smile. Remind him he can use those two.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Lead by example.
Speaker 10 (36:00):
Okay, all right, so let's see I'm getting it, Okay,
I thank god.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Do you always have this big of like like a
build up every time you send a text to anybody
you have to hype yourself up for it?
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Maybe?
Speaker 10 (36:14):
And no, it's just because you know it's so new
and I really like him and I don't want to Okay,
So all right, so okay, I've written it.
Speaker 2 (36:24):
Button said, there we go.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
Okay, you feel like you're text with your mom right now?
Speaker 2 (36:31):
All right? I mean, I just feel like we're not
like crossing the line here. We're not being offensive. We're
just being playful and joky and fun stay in.
Speaker 7 (36:38):
The middle, which is good.
Speaker 4 (36:39):
Dude.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
If he writes back and is like, no, sances on.
Speaker 5 (36:45):
He wrote that.
Speaker 2 (36:45):
Guy, he wrote that, Oh god, he's really fast. What
did he say?
Speaker 10 (36:50):
He said to laugh emoji.
Speaker 12 (36:52):
Yes, okay, he said, I was just messing with you.
I don't have a dead friend, thank god. But we
should text more.
Speaker 10 (37:07):
You're funny.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Oh no, text wary.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
Yeah, I don't know if we can be there for
every single text conversation that you have. But you know
what we'll do. We'll give you Brooks new landline. So
she's the only one in the entire city who has one.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
Now you know she's gonna be answered or the kids
will answer.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
That whole Family's funny. You feel like we've held you
out there, Dori. Can we leave you to it now?
Speaker 12 (37:36):
I think you guys an amazing job.
Speaker 10 (37:39):
I think going forward, our texts will dive better together now.
Speaker 3 (37:44):
I think, yeah, you need to read every text from
this man as a joke.
Speaker 1 (37:49):
On texts.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
Do those voice texts from now on?
Speaker 4 (37:52):
Amaze?
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Yeah, just so that you don't frustrate people with your
slow texting.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
Okay, anyway, that's textual. It's brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 5 (38:01):
Brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
We have an early nominee for Employee of the Year
after a Walmart worker shared the hilarious thing that happened
during her work break and it instantly went viral. Plus
a brand new dating hat that forces your biggest crush
to think about you all the time wherever they go,
and you don't even have to stalk to them this time, Alexis,
(38:28):
let's work for you. All of that is coming up
in a brand.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
New TikTok click shot.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
We're doing it. Oh my gosh, did you guys read
the latest Vogue? Apparently? Yeah, all of them. Apparently. The
new summer fashion this year is bleached brows, yellow clogs,
and then hanging out of the back of your cargo pants.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
Is your TikTok click shot.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Old fashion moves. When we do TikTok click shot where
we talk about the biggest tiktoks of the past week,
We're gonna get right to your first TikTok click shock,
which is from a Walmart employee named Brook. So right there,
you know she's nothing but trouble. This could be for
her user name is big Bicep Brook.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
Although I did a lot of push ups yesterday, I'm
trying to get there.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Well this Brook has got a couple hundred thousand views
on her latest video talking about what she did during
her latest shift working at Walmart.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
Okay, bruh.
Speaker 11 (39:29):
I usually take naps at work on my lunch break
and I send an alarm, And today I sent an alarm.
I guess I turned it off because I woke up
like two hours later and my shift is over.
Speaker 5 (39:42):
Oh it was a.
Speaker 11 (39:45):
Good nap, though, I'm going back home to finish that nap.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
That did basically silenced her alarm when it went off.
Kept on napping right through the entire rest of her shift.
Speaker 4 (39:57):
And I bet a dollar.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
That's not a good sign. Nobody at your work knows
that you're gone.
Speaker 5 (40:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:05):
The people in the comments weren't even mad at her, saying,
a win's a win, girl, Get that rest.
Speaker 3 (40:10):
I have taken so many car parking lot now. You
always tell me to take the side of the road sometimes.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Too, hopefully not in the middle of your work shift.
Speaker 1 (40:18):
You'll never know.
Speaker 2 (40:20):
One person said, I would just tell him you forgot
to clock back in after your break was over. Car
steal from the company, great idea, it is Walmart.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
Yeah, who feels guilty about that? If you're an employee,
Come on, Jeff.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
Okay, steal from stealing money from your companies is officially
brook approved.
Speaker 7 (40:39):
If I knew how to steal from our company, I would. Yeah,
there's just no cash registry.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
I take toilet paper when we're out at home.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
That's a TikTok click shot. Let's go to your.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Next TikTok click shot from.
Speaker 2 (40:50):
A woman named Theevia Let's spelled with a pH pheba.
Her video has been viewed over a million times and
it's going viral for her wild new dating hack called
the kavoodle Effect. Do you guys know what a kvoodle is?
Speaker 1 (41:05):
I know, No, I know what a kubboodle is.
Speaker 2 (41:07):
It's one of those fancy designer dogs. I have a
picture here kavoodles combined poodles with Cavalier King Charles.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
Very fancy teddy bears.
Speaker 2 (41:19):
Yeah, very cute. But Phoeba describes the kovoodle dating.
Speaker 14 (41:23):
Method step one, have something that you are extremely obsessed with.
For example, mine is kavoodles. I talk about them all
the time. I unknowingly talked about them so much with
an X of mine, so so so much, to the
point where every single time he saw something.
Speaker 2 (41:39):
Kavoodedly or a kavoodle is a dog. Okay, it's the
type of dog. I've got one.
Speaker 14 (41:43):
He would think of me. Whenever he saw a kvoodle,
he'd be like for Veyl, like kavoodles for Veya, kavoodle
kavoodle for Veya. He would send me Instagram reels, tiktog
reels everything before we started dating. Fast forward we start dating.
I asked him what made you what to date me?
And he said, everywhere I went there was a kavoodle.
I thought, of you, use this method on a boy
that you like, and you will be stuck in his
(42:04):
head forever.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Essentially, develop an unhealthy obsession with something and talk about
it so much that your crush will instantly think of
you whenever they see that thing.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
I like it, except that she said it's her ex
didn't work.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Yeah, that worked on the next guy too. Now that
Ox hates kaboodles. I mean honestly, it loses. Anytime any
of your excess at crop top, I can guarantee they
think of you.
Speaker 2 (42:26):
I thought Alexis kavoodle effect was car accidents.
Speaker 1 (42:31):
Got a couple of them. That's good. I want to
keep on their toes. It could be me right there, definite.
Speaker 2 (42:37):
Maybe jose yours is bowls of ramen effect.
Speaker 3 (42:40):
See that by soup dumpling video game, any sort of
food blog.
Speaker 7 (42:45):
Maybe colorful lights. I forgot what we were talking about.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
It everything, but try the kovoodle method. You'll either land
yourself a new boyfriend or girlfriend, or possibly a restraining order.
Speaker 4 (42:59):
Either way.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
This shot, that's a TikTok click shot. Let's get to
your final TikTok click shot, which was posted by someone
named the Kiffness, and he's had This guy has had
viral videos before where he takes random dog and cat
videos and remixes them with popular songs. So today he's
(43:23):
using a French bulldog named Walter singing Ryan Gosling song
from the Barbee movie. I'm just canting now the start,
you're gonna hear a little bit of gossling just to
set the tone for it, and then Walter takes over. Okay,
here we go and where else? Sad testife.
Speaker 8 (43:58):
I'm having a conversation, conversing me again. You're getting me
in trouble.
Speaker 7 (44:17):
I follow Walter.
Speaker 3 (44:19):
I put celebrity sleeves up on our website every day,
and I actually blew out all of the actual headlines
of celebrities and featured that dog.
Speaker 2 (44:28):
Walter is our new Kvoodle of webs The video got
two point nine million views.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
It deserves more. Yeah, nothing to I mean, sorry Jeffrey
for your parody song.
Speaker 2 (44:41):
I don't compare it to Walter, but the verdict is
Walter is enough. Those are your TikTok stories for the day.
Speaker 5 (44:50):
Brooking Jeffrey in the morning, we got a.
Speaker 2 (44:58):
New player, Alyssa the Phone, who is the mother to
two daughters aged one and five years old.
Speaker 1 (45:05):
Are you in it right now?
Speaker 2 (45:07):
They were apparently born on the same day those four
years apart. But she does feel bad because her kids
are constantly sick and she brings them into school and
daycare anyway, Oh do you do that all the time? Right?
You know what? It's their issue. The teachers will heal.
Speaker 7 (45:25):
Yeah, okay, so now we know where COVID started.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
You know what's sad is I just got off the
phone with my daughter who's homesick. But my husband he
does video shoots, so my daughter's literally laying in the
back of the car right now.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Yes, well, this isn't about you and your family book.
This is about Alyssa and her family. So Alyssa, welcome
to the show.
Speaker 5 (45:42):
Hi.
Speaker 3 (45:42):
Everyone, who's the easiest of the daughters?
Speaker 1 (45:46):
The older or the younger?
Speaker 2 (45:48):
Ah, the younger right now?
Speaker 1 (45:49):
Oh, it is easier.
Speaker 10 (45:51):
Yeah, I mean the oldest just talks a lot and
takes a lot of space.
Speaker 1 (45:57):
Space.
Speaker 2 (45:59):
Maybe try not to teach the younger one how to talk. Yeah,
it'll never talk back to.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
You every time she tries to walk. Push her down.
Speaker 2 (46:06):
Yeah, we're gonna raise some easy children for you. Alyss
Okay Brooks leaving the studio, So let's go over the
rules real quick. You got thirty seconds to answer as
many questions as possible. If you don't know when, you
could say pass, But you do have to beat her
outright if you want to win. Are you ready? Good luck?
Your time starts now. Today is National Ramen Noodle Day.
(46:26):
Which country eats the most instant ramen per year? The US,
Japan or China?
Speaker 4 (46:32):
Japan.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
What is the only state that borders three Canadian provinces?
Speaker 12 (46:37):
Washington? Oh, Washington.
Speaker 2 (46:38):
The sun is made up of two elements helium and
what else?
Speaker 5 (46:43):
I don't know?
Speaker 14 (46:44):
Pass.
Speaker 2 (46:44):
The leopard is the number one most endangered species in
the world. What African mammal rake? Second? What do you
call the number below the line of a fraction?
Speaker 14 (46:57):
The denominator?
Speaker 2 (46:58):
All right? Good? Work there. Lissa Brook's going to come
back into this studio. How do you feel like you
did there? Not great, I will say some of the
questions are a little bit tougher this time around. But
let's look at the phone screen. It says that you
plan events and meetings and you don't really get to
have fun, but you get to see everybody else have fun.
Speaker 14 (47:19):
Yes, exactly, because then by the time you get home,
you're just exhausted.
Speaker 7 (47:24):
Okay, so you're having vicarious fun.
Speaker 12 (47:26):
Yes, yes, of course you're in a bad.
Speaker 3 (47:28):
Planner, and you really don't want to throw any birthday
parties for your own kids because that's what you do
you in your day job, right, Yes.
Speaker 10 (47:35):
And then the expectation for when you do your own
party is so high for everyone's.
Speaker 1 (47:41):
So you're screwed either way.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
Brooke, it's your turn. Are you ready?
Speaker 1 (47:45):
I'm ready?
Speaker 2 (47:46):
Your time starts now. Today is National Ramen Noodle Day.
Which country eats the most instant ramen per year? The US,
Japan or China?
Speaker 1 (47:54):
I feel like the US.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
What is the only state that borders three Canadian provinces?
Speaker 3 (47:59):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (48:00):
The sun is made up of two elements helium and
what else?
Speaker 1 (48:04):
Hydrogen?
Speaker 2 (48:05):
The leopard is the number one most endangered species in
the world. What African mammal ranks seconds? What do you
call the number below the line of a fraction.
Speaker 1 (48:16):
Denominator?
Speaker 2 (48:20):
Just in time, we're gonna go over the scoreboard to
check out how you both did with jose heyny Man.
Speaker 6 (48:30):
I hate it when people say that, Elisa, you got
one correct today.
Speaker 2 (48:34):
Oh Man, all right, and.
Speaker 7 (48:38):
Brook Brook gets too.
Speaker 2 (48:43):
She edges you out for the victory today. Sorry about that,
Eliza Day. All right, we need to get these answers in.
It's National Ramen Noodle Day. The country that it's the
most instant ramen per year is China, with forty six
billion packets every year.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
We always want to eating.
Speaker 4 (48:58):
I know, I know.
Speaker 2 (48:59):
The only state that borders three Canadian provinces is Montana,
borders between British Columbia, Alberta, and Saskatchewan. The sun is
mainly made up of two elements, helium and hydrogen. Leopard's
the number one most endangered species in the world. Behind
them is rhinos the second, and the number that's below
(49:19):
the line of a fraction is the denominator, so alyssa. Unfortunately,
it wasn't enough to beat brook today. But the good
news is just for playing you do win a pair
of tickets to see The Barbie Movie in concert, Dance
the Night Away with the Barbie land Sinfignette as they
debut their summer twenty twenty four North American Amphitheater tour.
Speaker 10 (49:39):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (49:40):
Yeah, well, I hope motherhood continues to go well for you, Melissa.
Speaker 12 (49:46):
I hope wish me a lot.
Speaker 1 (49:47):
YEP, that's what I'm doing.
Speaker 7 (49:49):
Luck, we love you.
Speaker 2 (49:51):
Come back and play anytime you want. Okay, letssa, You're
welcome anytime.
Speaker 8 (49:54):
Thank you.
Speaker 7 (49:54):
Love the show girl said they loved me.
Speaker 1 (49:57):
Jeff did I color Melissa instead of all of a sudden.
Speaker 10 (50:00):
Yeah, it happens all the time.
Speaker 2 (50:03):
We've all messed up your name by Clarks. Have a
good day. We're gonna do wind drugs Block the same
time
Speaker 5 (50:10):
Tomorrow, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
I always tell people that this show won't make you smarter,
but it should make you laugh, all right, So yeah,
enjoy the full show. It starts right now.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Has our show finally hit the big time?
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Really?
Speaker 2 (00:12):
It's broken? Jeffrey in the morning. I'm not even talking
about having close to seven hundred thousand TikTok followers.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
That's pretty impressive, thanks everyone.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
I mean it's really not that impressive. My mom has
over eight hundred thousand. Sure, mom, I'm not talking about
Brooke launching her own successful side podcast called how to
Start your Own Third World Sweatshop with less than one
hundred k and that's taken off.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Yeah, we interview the children. That was dark.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
I'm sorry he's by sustainable.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
But in maybe the biggest news of all for our show,
we just found out that our own Alexis Fuller got
accepted onto the exclusive top tier VIP dating app.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Yea, yeah, this was if you could start dating a
celebrity and make some tabloids, would be really helpful for us.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Let's loose celebrity term on there. Obviously they let.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
You in, So I don't think Alexis you realize the
greatness that you have achieved here. This is something you
see contestants on The Bachelor trying to get on a list.
Actors have used Rayah before. Alexis, you know this isn't
just about you getting onto the end. This is about us.
Now we need to use this as a marketing tool
(01:29):
for our show. What do you think about posting the
top loser line of the week on your dating profile?
More beautiful and famous people listening.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
You don't think they're going to allow that on there's
always suspended.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Screen grab.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Your plan is just to use this to marry a Hemsworth.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
I don't want to marry him, Jeff.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
The most forgettable Jonas brother, phil or Luke or whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Nobody wants a Jonas brother.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
You have to stop being so selfish, Alexis and think
of the show first. We can say this what you're
doing at the Prince of Mumbai's Grand Palace once with him?
Speaker 3 (02:11):
I mean that'd be better than our local events.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
I kind of liked what you doing to the bus stop.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
This show is on an upward trajectory. Thank you, Alexis.
Now let's move on and get back into the shock
collar question of the day with our own star of
the show. Sort of.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
Thanks Joe sounded very genuine. Yeah, his name is Digital Jake.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
You're a start of my mom, Jake.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
He's too good for riots. Take it away, Jake.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
His movies have grossed over fourteen billion dollars worldwide.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
Whoa.
Speaker 4 (02:42):
He was named Time magazine sixty seventh most Influential person
of two thousand and eight seven. And he's the only
human being that can rock a go tea better than
Santa Claus.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
It's the Prince of Mumbai.
Speaker 1 (02:54):
Wait, why does Santa have a goateee?
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Some call him Sherlock Holmes, some call him iron Man,
but we know him as Robert Downey Junior. And today's birthday.
But did you know he shares it with another even
more famous celebrity who in their career had an estimated
net worth of ninety nine million dollars before they passed
(03:19):
away in twenty nineteen. Oh my god, I'm talking about
the one, the only Tartar Sauce aka Grumpy Cat.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Oh, it's a birthday Cat, And.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
To celebrate these two legends of entertainment and their shared birthday.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Fee Cat and Robert Downey June.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
That's right, Brooks, say it again. We're gonna play a
special Robert Downey Versus Grumpy Kitty edition of plenty of twenty.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Please tell me it's one of those who said it.
Where you read a quote, we have to guess.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
We'll go around the room and you give me a
number one through twenty and I'll read you a title
and you have to tell me if it's the name
of a Grumpy Cat video or a Robert Downey Junior film.
Guess correctly, and you stay in the game. This is
so We'll start with the woman who has a shirtless
photo of Grumpy Cat up in her cubicles, and that's Alexis.
(04:12):
Even the cats, I've never seen a shirt full photo real. Alexis,
give me a number one through twenty. Please ten, number
ten too much? Son? Was that a Grumpy Cat video
title or Robert Downey Junior movie?
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Game?
Speaker 1 (04:28):
This is the game.
Speaker 4 (04:30):
This is the game. This has always been the game.
And you better rise the occasion.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Grumpy Cat got a little grumpy when he.
Speaker 4 (04:36):
Was out, Alexis said, Grumpy Cat, that is correct. That's
a nineteen ninety one our DJ philm are you. I
would never lie about Robert Downey Junior versus Grumpy Is
It just hid been sunburn film After what it's actually
a multimillionaire is making out his will and his gay
(04:58):
son and his daughter a lesi in yet he vows
to leave his fortune to the first one who can
produce a grandchild.
Speaker 6 (05:03):
Oh wow, wow's sun.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
But it's a playoff. Is there too much? You'll never know?
Tell you watch it, Alexis, you're out embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Let's move over to Jose.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
Give me number one through twenty please.
Speaker 7 (05:19):
I'm gonna go twelve. I love that number.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
Jose, this is a hard one. Oh no, grump of Thrones.
Speaker 5 (05:25):
No?
Speaker 4 (05:27):
Is that a grumpy Cat clip or a Downy Junior flick?
Speaker 6 (05:31):
Okay, but imagine after iron Man dies, Robert Downey Junior
is like, you know, has a new career.
Speaker 4 (05:37):
It's a grum wait iron Man.
Speaker 7 (05:39):
Oh spoiler alert.
Speaker 4 (05:40):
Sorry, it could.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Have been like one of those like side passion projects
that the actors like to do after they do like
a big blockbuster film, they like to do an indie
movie that like speaks more to their soul.
Speaker 7 (05:51):
And now I am.
Speaker 6 (05:53):
I'm gonna say this is a grumpy Cat extravaganza.
Speaker 4 (05:56):
Jose said, grumpy Cat. That is correct. Ten years ago
they put him on the actual throwne the Iron Throne
from Game of Thrones and you know what, Grumby Cat
he didn't like classic.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Somebody needs to write the movie though Thrones and cast
Robert Downey Jr.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
In it.
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Let's go to Brook Brooki me number one through twenty seven. Brook,
your title is back to School? Is that a Grumpy
Cat video or a Robert Downey Junior movie.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
That sounds like a terrible comedy where.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
He's the father or the janitor that gives advice to all.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
The or it's like a playoff of Billy Madison where
he's like going back to school. Right, Robert Downey Junior
did a lot of questionable films, but I can also
see Grumby Cat a little backpack on, just.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
Really upset about his first day.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
Of came But I'm gonna stick with RDJ.
Speaker 4 (06:50):
WHOA Brooks said Robert Downey Junior. That is correct. It's
actually booth Oh, the nineteen eighty six comedy starring r.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
E J.
Speaker 4 (07:03):
And his dad Rodney Dangerfield when they attend the same college.
And then in twenty twelve, grumpy Cat, equipped with a
tiny backpack, makes his way to a local school following
a trail of chicken and liver Cat trees.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
So I got both plots right, Yeah, you.
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Kind of did, Jeffrey, you gotta get this one right
or Robert Downey Junior and Grumpy Cat is over forever, Jeffrey,
give me number one through twenty please thirteen, Jeffery, your
title is rented lips. Was that a Robert Downey Junior
movie or a Grumpy Cat video?
Speaker 6 (07:31):
I hope this one's a Robert Downy to follow up
to the pre movie.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Have you seen the mouth on that grumpy Cat. He's
got like down like you focus right in on that mouth,
and I would rent those lips.
Speaker 4 (07:44):
Frown.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
I picture him with those wax lips. Yeah, get wax lips.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
On the mind immediately went to grumpy Cat on that
give me.
Speaker 4 (07:51):
Grumpy Cat, jeff said, grumpy Cat, that is incorrect. That's
a nineteen eighty eight Robert Downey Junior film where two
friends are given the chance to cree their passion project,
a musical on Indian farming. That means you've won this
edition of Plenty of Plenty from Kennedy Brown.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
So Jose gets to choose who gets shocked, and they're
going to be singing Promiscuous by Nelly for time.
Speaker 7 (08:15):
I don't know who I want to get shocked? Can
I choose myself? Yeah, this is for you, grubby.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
Cat bro shock me okay from.
Speaker 7 (08:23):
Misuse cat you will.
Speaker 4 (08:28):
I'm glad you stopped that happened.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
That's your shock collar question of the day.
Speaker 5 (08:34):
Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
Fifteen to twenty years ago, there was a middle school
kid who was running probably one of the first ever
internet scams, a middle school kid, and you may have
been a victim of it. Oh, up until this point,
he's never told anyone about this, But after you hear it,
you might think, dang, that could be the smartest middle
(08:59):
school kid ever. And he owes me my two hundred
bucks back. Wait what you're gonna hear it? In a
brand new mass speaker that's coming up.
Speaker 8 (09:09):
You don't hear me?
Speaker 4 (09:11):
Concession. I can't take back earl arms.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
Little mouse speaker got a text to seventy eight five
nine two says I just witnessed my wife of fourteen
years slice up a banana using scissors, and I don't
know if I'll ever recover from that mental image.
Speaker 3 (09:31):
I want to try it, don't I used?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
No, dude, kitchen scissors are money. I use it to
cut up chicken breast.
Speaker 5 (09:38):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
It's so good. It's a good PSA at all the wives.
Don't scissor your husband's bananas. Okay. We learn all sorts
of important lessons on this segment of what not to
do in your life. I'm supposed to do that.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
You may say it differently.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
Maybe we'll learn a new lesson from today's guest caller,
who's chosen to go by Jason as his alias. So, Jason,
welcome to the show.
Speaker 9 (10:00):
Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
Hello, how are you doing? Jason?
Speaker 4 (10:04):
Good?
Speaker 5 (10:04):
Good god?
Speaker 1 (10:05):
How are you okay? I mean, even with the voice changer,
you seem pretty chill.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
Yeah, voice changer is on for it. You're the mass speaker. Now,
whenever you're ready, we want to hear your confession.
Speaker 9 (10:14):
All right. So, back when I was in like the
seventh grade, I was, uh, I was kind of an
internet camera.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
You just dropped that castle. I mean you're a twelve
year old internet scammer? Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (10:31):
Yeah, yeah, it was an inn camera.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Why are you so casual about this?
Speaker 5 (10:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (10:37):
I mean I was thinking about three hundred dollars a month.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (10:42):
What was the scam you were running.
Speaker 9 (10:45):
Well, I mean back then, like I go to the
website Nickelodeon dot com. Yeah, and they had this game
called nick Tropolis. Okay, they said, what Ukraine an avatar
build a house, furnish it even you.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Won't okay, just interact. Look did you play this, Selexis?
I don't know. It sounded familiar.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I thought it kind of sounds like the Sims, but
like a kid's version of that. Yeah.
Speaker 9 (11:10):
Yeah, and there was these options about nice of furniture TVs.
Speaker 6 (11:15):
Okay, okay, I will say, because I'm a big Fortnite guy,
when you buy a rare skin, kids know, they're like,
oh my gosh, you have.
Speaker 7 (11:24):
The Dark Night from season.
Speaker 4 (11:27):
Yeah, so I can see you.
Speaker 7 (11:29):
Find a rare couch and people being like.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Oh damn.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
It's funny how in this game you could be like
a little bougie Seventh.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
I don't understand where the skim comes in though, so
you you play and what.
Speaker 9 (11:44):
It comes So back then, you know, if you forget
your password to your account, one of the security questions
you could choose was what is your eye color?
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Okay okay, and.
Speaker 9 (11:54):
If you got it right, it would tell you your
past were right there? Oh right, well yeah, so I
decided to use that information for my own benefits.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
What hell.
Speaker 9 (12:05):
So in the game, I go to popular locations in
nick Tropolis and I just write down random people's use
the name, so I thought, and I log out type in.
Speaker 10 (12:16):
To use the name.
Speaker 9 (12:18):
Each of them had a security questions that to.
Speaker 5 (12:21):
What is the eye color?
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Oh? You just gall I mean I would assume everybody's brown.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Pople at brown Eyes is all right, you get into it,
you're getting done.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Oh, we're almost as smart as the twelve.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
Year old you.
Speaker 9 (12:35):
Yeah, most of us had eye colors.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
The question the easiest one.
Speaker 6 (12:42):
Yeah, because you don't have you know, what was your
you know, great ants, middle or your first job one.
Speaker 9 (12:49):
Se see y'all, see, y'all kitching all.
Speaker 5 (12:51):
You're kitching on.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
Okay, so you've hacked into their nick Tropolis account. Now
what what do you do with that?
Speaker 7 (12:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (12:57):
Okay, So when I'm in there and I would go
to that houses, yeah, basically I raise them.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
You would raise their virtual house.
Speaker 10 (13:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 9 (13:06):
Yeah, no, So I sent all of this furniture and
decorations to my.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Account you can gift to other people.
Speaker 7 (13:14):
Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 3 (13:17):
So, I mean that sucks, But like, where does the
three hundred dollars come in? How are you making three
hundred dollars a month on this?
Speaker 9 (13:23):
Well, you have to go to the store in the game.
But I can say I don't say I quote.
Speaker 5 (13:28):
Unquote purchased myself.
Speaker 9 (13:32):
So I'm taking those things and I took from the
other people, and I'm reselling them at a lower price.
Speaker 6 (13:38):
All people do this in baseball games where they they
get stubs and they resell.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Them in the video game.
Speaker 7 (13:45):
Yeah, in the video game abundance of things, and it
turns into like.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
That's kind of this would not fly on Club Penguin.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Let me wait, this big screen TV looks exactly like
the one that was stolen from my house.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Wait did you ever get caught by any of the users?
Did they call you out?
Speaker 9 (14:04):
No? No, it's surprised and they never got cout.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
The beauty of the early days of like Nickelodeon, dot
com and it's just.
Speaker 7 (14:11):
A small crime.
Speaker 6 (14:12):
Imagine going to your mom and crying, like, mom, someone
took all the furniture in the video game.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
Are they going to kid?
Speaker 2 (14:19):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (14:20):
Good luck?
Speaker 1 (14:22):
Wow, So you were you were a burglar?
Speaker 7 (14:26):
Burglar?
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Yeah, why do you sound so happy about it, like
you're admitting to scamming all these like poor little kids
out of their accounts.
Speaker 9 (14:36):
I mean that I needed but it was funny.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
Oh, it's so funny.
Speaker 9 (14:46):
But I think it hit me in real life. Now
I'm a used car.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
No old stuff. You're not stealing those cars that you're
selling first, right the question?
Speaker 1 (14:59):
No? No, no, okay, somebody else is he buys him
with a board?
Speaker 2 (15:06):
Okay, Well, thanks for that confession. I'm a little bit
scared to talk to you, but text in seven eight,
five nine too. If you have a confession you've been
holding on to, will hide your identity, mask your voice,
and make you the next mass speaker.
Speaker 5 (15:17):
Your phone TAP's coming up next, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
In today's prank, two roommates have been living in a
house together, and after a whole year, one finally convinced
the other to hire a professional house cleaner. Really really, now.
The guy we're about to call never wanted anybody to
come over to his place. He was worried that they'd
steal stuff or rearrange things in a weird way because
he never had one growing up, so he was very,
(15:43):
very wary, with good reason. Though, because his roommate listens
to our show and called us with a wild idea, saying,
let's have Brooke be the house cleaner who's stuck in
a dark room and can't find her way out. Yep,
you're gonna hear it in your phone. Tap right Now's
Mornings on the twenty.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Hello, Hi, Trevor, Trevor.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
Speaking.
Speaker 11 (16:10):
How can I help you?
Speaker 5 (16:11):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Hi, I'm a I'm the housekeeper you hired for today.
Speaker 11 (16:16):
Oh oh hey, how you doing?
Speaker 7 (16:18):
Probably to call my roommate you're the one that hired you.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Yeah, well I tried to call him. He didn't answer,
and I'm sorry. I just I need some help.
Speaker 3 (16:30):
Help with what? How can I help you?
Speaker 7 (16:33):
You know what?
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Funny thing happened to me? So I'm in a room
and I I can't get out.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
You're in a room that you can't get out.
Speaker 4 (16:43):
Where are you at?
Speaker 11 (16:44):
You're on the first floor.
Speaker 3 (16:45):
No, I'm up on the second floor and it's just
so dark and I can't find the light switch anywhere.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
So wait, you're you're the house cleaner and you're went
into a room where there was no lights.
Speaker 3 (16:58):
And you could just let me know, like light switches
usually left wall, right, wall in the middle.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
What was that?
Speaker 1 (17:10):
What was what? Didn't hear anything?
Speaker 10 (17:13):
I heard it Lloyd's room?
Speaker 3 (17:15):
Are you in, Like I said, I'd love to tell you,
but I can't see it.
Speaker 7 (17:21):
Real problem.
Speaker 3 (17:22):
I'm just I'm kind of like putting my hands out
and feeling along that.
Speaker 10 (17:29):
What are you doing.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
I'm just trying to get out of here. There's anything
valuable around here? Do you?
Speaker 2 (17:35):
I don't know if you're in my room or not,
but like you can just easily just open the drape
that way you can just see, you know, have some light.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
That's a great idea. I did not think of that.
Now I just need to find which.
Speaker 12 (17:48):
Oh my god, what there.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Was just something in the middle of the floor. That's weird,
right to keep things in.
Speaker 7 (17:56):
The middle of the floor.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
Knocking over my well.
Speaker 1 (18:01):
I don't know if it's your stuff.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
I can't see anything, so, I mean, it's amazing. I
could hold my hand in front of my face. I
got nothing. If I swing my arm around me.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
I just thought if I swung that way, it'd be fine.
But maybe if I just swing the other way.
Speaker 12 (18:22):
This is what I did not want him to get a.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Oh man, this is gonna be a lot of cleaning.
I don't know what my company, what.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Kind of quote they gave you, but they take me
another hour or so.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
What are you doing just trying to.
Speaker 8 (18:41):
Find a light switch, a drake?
Speaker 4 (18:45):
Oh my.
Speaker 7 (18:47):
Bugger.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
At this point, I think you're just you're just purposely making.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Okay, listen, listen, I hear you. But good news. I
don't want to lose good news. I found my vacuum.
I've got it right here.
Speaker 5 (19:08):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (19:11):
I say, this is a big.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Room, this is a.
Speaker 4 (19:17):
Whatever you're doing, let me ask.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
You a question that's totally unrelated. How's your insurance like
Runner's insurance?
Speaker 2 (19:25):
Are you saying that because you broke all my.
Speaker 8 (19:29):
Out?
Speaker 5 (19:30):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (19:30):
Man, that was on my knee out.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
You know, it's interesting that you're not worried about me
in this situation, because you're.
Speaker 12 (19:39):
The one that's wiping everything thats walking around the house.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
I'm pretty sure most of this stuff was broken when
I got here.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Did you want a big party last night?
Speaker 4 (19:50):
Oh? My god?
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Now that one that one I dropped.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
Oh my god, I'm gonna call my room right now
and tell him.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Actually, you know, I forgot to mention at the beginning
when I was looking.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Around here that I have already talked to him.
Speaker 4 (20:06):
Eric.
Speaker 3 (20:08):
Him, Yeah, yeah, I talked to him when he set
you up for this prank phone call.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
What oh god, Yeah, that's actually our studio. This is
actually Brook for Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. We're
doing a phone tap on you. Those sound effects.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
God, did you really think I was a house cleaner
that couldn't find a life switch?
Speaker 2 (20:32):
I thought everything that I owned wind Oh, oh my god.
Speaker 4 (20:38):
That's so nervous that that one.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Was your television. But I'm sure you have a warranty
I do, but still.
Speaker 5 (20:45):
Oh my god, wake every morning with slow tap weekday
mornings on the twenties Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
In a new relationship, there's all sorts of little things
that can give you the ICKND like if they part
their hair the same way your dog does, is right
in half, or if after every kiss they giggle and
in a baby voice say do it again, mama, Yeah,
(21:17):
you know, coming back from those. That's why one of
our listeners needs our help today because she's been dating
this great guy and the one thing that might be
giving him the ick is the awkward text exchanges that
they've been having. And like just this morning, she got
a message she has no idea how to respond to.
So we're gonna try and step in and help her
(21:39):
out with a brand new textual healing coming up.
Speaker 8 (21:45):
I like it.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Text you will, then text you will needless to say.
This morning show has many many skins using our fingers,
pencil tricks, tummy tickles, me and Jose pinching our noses
when we pass by Brooks lunch. We are very very
good with our fingers.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
You can spell cauliflowers so much. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (22:16):
Yeah, it's not pleasant, especially when you put it in
the microwaves.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Yes, with spinach.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
But you know what, maybe our best finger skill is texting,
and we have to help our listeners come up to
our level with this segment called textual Healing, where we
help somebody with their texting conversation when they don't quite
know what to say. And today's honored guest who needs
some tender textual healing is Dory. So let's welcome Dory
to the show.
Speaker 10 (22:44):
How you doing, tie, everybody?
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Are you hungry? You want some lunch? I'll give you some?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Yeah, say no, say no.
Speaker 11 (22:57):
Ye.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Story. You reached out for us because you need help
with some texting. Who are we going to be texting today?
Speaker 10 (23:06):
Yes, you guys, I met this guy and we've been
going out three or four weeks.
Speaker 12 (23:13):
It's not exclusive.
Speaker 10 (23:15):
We haven't had the exclusive talk. But in real life,
I really really like him.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
In virtual life, do you like him too?
Speaker 12 (23:26):
Not so much?
Speaker 10 (23:31):
No, in texting life, it's a problem. The thing is,
when we're together, it's great, I have no issues.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
I really like.
Speaker 10 (23:38):
Him again, But when it comes to texting, we're off.
Speaker 7 (23:43):
Really really, I know exactly what you mean.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Maybe he's just not I mean, I feel like there's
a lot of people out there that don't know how
to keep a conversation going on text.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
Is that what it is? Does it feel like you
text him and then things just stop?
Speaker 10 (23:56):
I'm just not sure what it is.
Speaker 12 (23:59):
It's really not vibing.
Speaker 10 (24:00):
It's like it's so different from how we are when
we're together.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Like, do you have an example of like how you're
texting is in meshing with each other?
Speaker 5 (24:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 10 (24:11):
Actually I do. So. One time he texted me and
he said, when you come over later, the neighbor's kids
have challenged us to a water fight.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Okay, that's cute.
Speaker 12 (24:26):
That is cute, right, right?
Speaker 10 (24:28):
That was a cute text, and so I texted back,
I said, oh, that sounds like fun I'm.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
In Yeah, that's a good response, square gut emoji.
Speaker 10 (24:37):
And then he texted, should I wait for you to
boil the water? Oh?
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Wait, he's gonna pour boiling water on the neighbor children.
It's funny, right, yeah.
Speaker 12 (24:51):
I mean I was confused. I was like what, and
then he was just like, oh, he was just joking.
Speaker 10 (24:58):
But that's an example I'm trying to say of why
it's off in real life.
Speaker 12 (25:03):
I don't seem to have that confusion.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
In real life.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
You get jokes on you where you could see your
water boiling in real life. That way, there's no question.
Speaker 7 (25:13):
This is a thing. You have bad text chemistry.
Speaker 4 (25:16):
Usually if you talk.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
About this a lot, they'll say is that a bad thing?
Speaker 2 (25:20):
Though?
Speaker 1 (25:20):
Is it like bad for a relationship?
Speaker 7 (25:22):
You know, excited to text him?
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Like are you worried about but you're doing You're not
gonna text all day anyway? That's true.
Speaker 10 (25:28):
I mean I am a little bit worried about it
because it sets a dynamic off like I don't know
to go forward or what.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
Okay, So you you feel like every time that you
guys do a text conversation, it's like subtracting from your
relationship in real life. So where are you at right
now in your convo with him via text?
Speaker 10 (25:49):
It's still confusing to me, Like, actually, today he texted
me something. That's why I'm calling you, guys. I don't
know how to respond.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
Okay, So I sent him with let me.
Speaker 12 (26:00):
Read it to you.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Okay.
Speaker 10 (26:02):
I said, Hey, that computer that you let me borrow,
do you know how much ram it has?
Speaker 2 (26:11):
Okay?
Speaker 7 (26:12):
It sounds like a bad pick up life.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Do you let you borrow a computer?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 12 (26:15):
Well he let me a computer.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Okay.
Speaker 13 (26:18):
It was a really serious question I needed to.
Speaker 10 (26:20):
Know for downloading or whatever.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Okay.
Speaker 10 (26:23):
So I was serious about it, and he responded, you guys,
he said, sorry, I don't know. It was a friend
of mine and he's dead.
Speaker 11 (26:34):
Now.
Speaker 2 (26:35):
Wow, okay, how do you read that?
Speaker 7 (26:42):
Very dark?
Speaker 10 (26:43):
I don't know what to think.
Speaker 13 (26:45):
I mean, I didn't respond or text back because I
don't know whether to make a joke. If he was joking,
you know, if it's really true, then I might say
something that's insensitive to a dead man.
Speaker 5 (27:00):
Yeah. Help.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
So we're responding back to this text with you right
now about his friend, we're possibly dying?
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Yes, okay, can you just right back? Are you serious? Question?
Speaker 2 (27:12):
Markers sounds kind of cold and heartless. I think that
no matter what happens, especially early on in a relationship,
you want to keep things as light and as playful
as possible.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
You mentioned a friend, but maybe.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
But he was joking about the water balloons and boiling
water on top of children. His sense of humor is
a little bit different.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
So what if you.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
Write back and you say, uh, oh is this computer cursed?
Speaker 2 (27:35):
Okay, no, no, no.
Speaker 7 (27:37):
If he's dark, you gotta go darker?
Speaker 6 (27:38):
Be like, how did you kill him?
Speaker 7 (27:42):
How did you murder your friend?
Speaker 1 (27:43):
That curse was dark enough?
Speaker 2 (27:45):
What about what if you said, how about we get
out the Ouiji board and ask him?
Speaker 7 (27:51):
That's dark?
Speaker 2 (27:53):
Stry? What do you think? I have lots of options
to choose from.
Speaker 6 (27:56):
There, none of them are being normal at this point, though,
you have to get back with a dark song.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
Well, she didn't come to us for a normal response
to be like, oh sorry, we need a fun, playful response.
Speaker 3 (28:07):
You want a saance to talk to the friend to
figure out them.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
I mean that's acknowledging what he said. It's joking back
in a not mean way. What do you think, Torri?
Speaker 10 (28:18):
I do like where you're coming from, So I feel
like I could say something like, well, can we have
a sayance so we can find out.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
Okay, I like that.
Speaker 1 (28:28):
You could use that crystal ball emoji.
Speaker 3 (28:30):
Oh yeah, whatever, but whatever, the message will come through
either way.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
Why don't you Why don't you type that out and
send it to your your new guy friend here.
Speaker 12 (28:44):
I'm want to do it right now, you guys, Okay,
you have.
Speaker 7 (28:48):
To do it right now.
Speaker 2 (28:48):
That's the.
Speaker 1 (28:51):
Name.
Speaker 2 (28:52):
We didn't ask for his name.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
Okay, need it?
Speaker 12 (28:55):
Okay right now?
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Yeah, I don't want to distract her and ruin the
text laughing.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
Okay, she makes so funny?
Speaker 7 (29:02):
Is funny?
Speaker 12 (29:04):
All right, I'm gonna send it.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
All right, let's do it.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
And okay, all.
Speaker 7 (29:11):
Right, there's no way he's like, actually, my friend does
haunt me.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
It couldn't come back to this Friday, so that works
out perfectly.
Speaker 7 (29:21):
But this is fun enough.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
We've laid the groundwork for a nice, playful conversation for
the rest of the way. We're gonna come back and
see if he responds to that.
Speaker 5 (29:29):
For the other.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Friend, what's his name? Who are we texting? Andre Andre.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
We'll see if Andre responds and we continue textual healing
right after this. We're in the middle of textual healing
with our listener Dory, and normally we get a lot
of relationship stuff on this segment about how to text
your crush or the ups guy, how to text Brooks
husband to get him out of the house so Roy
the traveling salesman can come over, but a.
Speaker 7 (29:59):
Lot of excuses for that.
Speaker 3 (30:00):
Yeah, the text with Roy is fine, though, Yeah, I'm
kidding any if you're listening, there's no This.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Is a little bit different though, because Dorry needs our
help texting the guy that she's just started dating. All
their in person chemistry is off the charts, it's just
when they're on the phone texting it can get a
little bit rocky and they can't tell when the other
person is joking or not.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
Oh my god, you know, I still don't fully know either.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
Yeah, that's why she emailed us today, because she was
asking him over text about a computer that she borrowed
and how much ram it has. He responded with, I
don't know. That computer belonged to my dead friend. So
that put us at an interesting fork in the road.
Do we take that seriously or assume that it was
a joke.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
I mean, like Alexis said, this is why emojis were invented.
Speaker 1 (30:47):
He needs them.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
He joked before with a previous text. So we went
down that road again and wrote back, well, maybe we
should do a seance to find out. Yeah, trying to
be played. Yeah, and I'm thinking, like, after we did it,
I'm worried, like, did we really do that? That's a
little bit it is a little bit dangerous.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
We can apologize.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
I am interested to see if Andre has replied to it, dorry,
Have you gotten any word back?
Speaker 5 (31:15):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (31:17):
Oh no?
Speaker 1 (31:17):
What did he say?
Speaker 10 (31:19):
Okay? He said, oh snap, do you believe in that too?
We should one hundred percent emoji do a seance for
our next date.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
Okay, okay, he continues.
Speaker 10 (31:36):
If he responds, you're gonna love him. He's a great guy.
Speaker 7 (31:43):
Yeah, that's what I'm worried.
Speaker 2 (31:45):
How do you how do you read that door? Do
you think he's joking back or is he being serious?
Speaker 5 (31:49):
Now?
Speaker 10 (31:50):
I think he believes in ghosts?
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Where do you stand on that belief? Are you down
having a seance with your new boyfriend?
Speaker 7 (31:59):
She's not gonna have a really saying.
Speaker 3 (32:01):
Does mean that it actually is the friend's laptop and
the friends did see.
Speaker 7 (32:04):
I'm one hundred percent on the joking side.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
People.
Speaker 7 (32:08):
People want to joke around NonStop, like me, never stop.
That's why it says non stop, Brook, he just took
it too far exactly. He's not gonna stop.
Speaker 2 (32:16):
I don't know if he is, because if he'd sent
the text without mentioning the friends specifically, then I would
think it's a joke. But the fact that he's bringing
up his friend might mean that that's serious.
Speaker 1 (32:26):
And then you're going to meet him. I think he
thinks you're going to meet him. It should be cool.
That's a step in a relationship. Friends.
Speaker 2 (32:36):
Is it a little bit too soon to be meeting
the dead? Friends?
Speaker 5 (32:41):
Okay?
Speaker 7 (32:42):
Okay, now meet Grandma. Let's find her relatives.
Speaker 12 (32:45):
You guys, I'm so worried now, I mean, what do
I say?
Speaker 3 (32:49):
Okay, Okay, Now we gotta legitimately find out if this
is a joke or not?
Speaker 6 (32:54):
Right?
Speaker 5 (32:55):
Do we need to do that?
Speaker 1 (32:56):
Brook?
Speaker 5 (32:56):
Well?
Speaker 1 (32:57):
What else do we do?
Speaker 3 (32:57):
We just keep on the road and we don't know
whether we should show up on Friday night.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
The trains in motion, don't jump in front and try
to stop it.
Speaker 7 (33:05):
Now keep joking.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Why do you say this? What do you say?
Speaker 2 (33:08):
This?
Speaker 1 (33:08):
Truth is it'd be my first seance. What should I
bring to that type of date?
Speaker 7 (33:13):
What do I wear?
Speaker 2 (33:15):
I just doesn't like it? Now?
Speaker 7 (33:17):
Is being polite?
Speaker 2 (33:18):
She always says, totally.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
Want to know what you need to know? Like do
you bring a bottle of wine? Do you need to
wear a black dress?
Speaker 9 (33:26):
Like?
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Where are we at?
Speaker 2 (33:27):
Are you actually open to a seance here? Dorri for real?
Speaker 10 (33:31):
Not really?
Speaker 2 (33:34):
But maybe there's a way we can joke in back home.
Speaker 10 (33:36):
I really, I really like you guys response.
Speaker 12 (33:38):
That's truth.
Speaker 10 (33:39):
It'll be my first seance.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
What should I bring?
Speaker 10 (33:42):
I like?
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Now you do? Okay, then just send that. Let's just
send it, okay, you guys.
Speaker 12 (33:49):
I've texted, okay, texted it, and now.
Speaker 7 (33:51):
We'll only I think be able to tell from this text.
Speaker 6 (33:53):
Because if he says wear something nice and be respectful
for the.
Speaker 7 (33:57):
Dead, then you'll know he's serious. If he's like a
bunny costume.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Then you know he's go to a pet cemetery and
dig up a dead animal. We meet the bones from it.
Speaker 12 (34:07):
You guys, you guys, he touched it back.
Speaker 2 (34:11):
Okay, that was really quick for a geez. He's really
excited about this.
Speaker 10 (34:16):
He said, Oh, are you serious? That could be a
deal breaker for me.
Speaker 3 (34:23):
Doing it or not doing it, no asking, no admitting
that it's her first time.
Speaker 10 (34:28):
That or or me being into it is a deal breaker.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
I don't know why. Yeah, just say I was joking
and just leave it at that, and then and then
he can decide what the joke was.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Can we joke back and say, like, oh, thank god,
because I was worried I was gonna fall in love
with your dead friend, or you.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
Were worried his friend was going to hit on you.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
I mean, because remember, like our mission here is just
to try and connect with Andre this guy that she's.
Speaker 1 (35:08):
Texting, and it is off still it is.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
Well, we're talking too much about Andrea's possibly dead friends.
Speaker 1 (35:14):
I like, I like your joke. I think your joke's funny. Okay,
like I do.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
I liked your version of it, though a little bit
better than mine.
Speaker 1 (35:21):
Oh okay, I was worried that he was going to
hit on me anyway.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
Yeah, ghosts have a thing for me, So I was
worried he was going to fall in love with me anyway.
What you're showing by by doing that is that you're
like a light, playful person. You don't take things too seriously.
You're just trying to like have a good time with him, right.
Speaker 10 (35:39):
I'm not being judgmental or yeah, let's just send that.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Maybe you can put a laugh emoji on the end
because it's a little ghosts it's a joke.
Speaker 1 (35:52):
Yeah, smile. Remind him he can use those two.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Lead by example.
Speaker 10 (36:00):
Okay, all right, so let's see I'm getting it, Okay,
I thank god.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Do you always have this big of like like a
build up every time you send a text to anybody
you have to hype yourself up for it?
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Maybe?
Speaker 10 (36:14):
And no, it's just because you know it's so new
and I really like him and I don't want to Okay,
So all right, so okay, I've written it.
Speaker 2 (36:24):
Button said, there we go.
Speaker 1 (36:25):
Okay, you feel like you're text with your mom right now?
Speaker 2 (36:31):
All right? I mean, I just feel like we're not
like crossing the line here. We're not being offensive. We're
just being playful and joky and fun stay in.
Speaker 7 (36:38):
The middle, which is good.
Speaker 4 (36:39):
Dude.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
If he writes back and is like, no, sances on.
Speaker 5 (36:45):
He wrote that.
Speaker 2 (36:45):
Guy, he wrote that, Oh god, he's really fast. What
did he say?
Speaker 10 (36:50):
He said to laugh emoji.
Speaker 12 (36:52):
Yes, okay, he said, I was just messing with you.
I don't have a dead friend, thank god. But we
should text more.
Speaker 10 (37:07):
You're funny.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Oh no, text wary.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
Yeah, I don't know if we can be there for
every single text conversation that you have. But you know
what we'll do. We'll give you Brooks new landline. So
she's the only one in the entire city who has one.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
Now you know she's gonna be answered or the kids
will answer.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
That whole Family's funny. You feel like we've held you
out there, Dori. Can we leave you to it now?
Speaker 12 (37:36):
I think you guys an amazing job.
Speaker 10 (37:39):
I think going forward, our texts will dive better together now.
Speaker 3 (37:44):
I think, yeah, you need to read every text from
this man as a joke.
Speaker 1 (37:49):
On texts.
Speaker 2 (37:50):
Do those voice texts from now on?
Speaker 4 (37:52):
Amaze?
Speaker 1 (37:52):
Yeah, just so that you don't frustrate people with your
slow texting.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
Okay, anyway, that's textual. It's brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 5 (38:01):
Brooking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
We have an early nominee for Employee of the Year
after a Walmart worker shared the hilarious thing that happened
during her work break and it instantly went viral. Plus
a brand new dating hat that forces your biggest crush
to think about you all the time wherever they go,
and you don't even have to stalk to them this time, Alexis,
(38:28):
let's work for you. All of that is coming up
in a brand.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
New TikTok click shot.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
We're doing it. Oh my gosh, did you guys read
the latest Vogue? Apparently? Yeah, all of them. Apparently. The
new summer fashion this year is bleached brows, yellow clogs,
and then hanging out of the back of your cargo pants.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
Is your TikTok click shot.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Old fashion moves. When we do TikTok click shot where
we talk about the biggest tiktoks of the past week,
We're gonna get right to your first TikTok click shock,
which is from a Walmart employee named Brook. So right there,
you know she's nothing but trouble. This could be for
her user name is big Bicep Brook.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
Although I did a lot of push ups yesterday, I'm
trying to get there.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Well this Brook has got a couple hundred thousand views
on her latest video talking about what she did during
her latest shift working at Walmart.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
Okay, bruh.
Speaker 11 (39:29):
I usually take naps at work on my lunch break
and I send an alarm, And today I sent an alarm.
I guess I turned it off because I woke up
like two hours later and my shift is over.
Speaker 5 (39:42):
Oh it was a.
Speaker 11 (39:45):
Good nap, though, I'm going back home to finish that nap.
Speaker 2 (39:50):
That did basically silenced her alarm when it went off.
Kept on napping right through the entire rest of her shift.
Speaker 4 (39:57):
And I bet a dollar.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
That's not a good sign. Nobody at your work knows
that you're gone.
Speaker 5 (40:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:05):
The people in the comments weren't even mad at her, saying,
a win's a win, girl, Get that rest.
Speaker 3 (40:10):
I have taken so many car parking lot now. You
always tell me to take the side of the road sometimes.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Too, hopefully not in the middle of your work shift.
Speaker 1 (40:18):
You'll never know.
Speaker 2 (40:20):
One person said, I would just tell him you forgot
to clock back in after your break was over. Car
steal from the company, great idea, it is Walmart.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
Yeah, who feels guilty about that? If you're an employee,
Come on, Jeff.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
Okay, steal from stealing money from your companies is officially
brook approved.
Speaker 7 (40:39):
If I knew how to steal from our company, I would. Yeah,
there's just no cash registry.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
I take toilet paper when we're out at home.
Speaker 2 (40:46):
That's a TikTok click shot. Let's go to your.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
Next TikTok click shot from.
Speaker 2 (40:50):
A woman named Theevia Let's spelled with a pH pheba.
Her video has been viewed over a million times and
it's going viral for her wild new dating hack called
the kavoodle Effect. Do you guys know what a kvoodle is?
Speaker 1 (41:05):
I know, No, I know what a kubboodle is.
Speaker 2 (41:07):
It's one of those fancy designer dogs. I have a
picture here kavoodles combined poodles with Cavalier King Charles.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
Very fancy teddy bears.
Speaker 2 (41:19):
Yeah, very cute. But Phoeba describes the kovoodle dating.
Speaker 14 (41:23):
Method step one, have something that you are extremely obsessed with.
For example, mine is kavoodles. I talk about them all
the time. I unknowingly talked about them so much with
an X of mine, so so so much, to the
point where every single time he saw something.
Speaker 2 (41:39):
Kavoodedly or a kavoodle is a dog. Okay, it's the
type of dog. I've got one.
Speaker 14 (41:43):
He would think of me. Whenever he saw a kvoodle,
he'd be like for Veyl, like kavoodles for Veya, kavoodle
kavoodle for Veya. He would send me Instagram reels, tiktog
reels everything before we started dating. Fast forward we start dating.
I asked him what made you what to date me?
And he said, everywhere I went there was a kavoodle.
I thought, of you, use this method on a boy
that you like, and you will be stuck in his
(42:04):
head forever.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Essentially, develop an unhealthy obsession with something and talk about
it so much that your crush will instantly think of
you whenever they see that thing.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
I like it, except that she said it's her ex
didn't work.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Yeah, that worked on the next guy too. Now that
Ox hates kaboodles. I mean honestly, it loses. Anytime any
of your excess at crop top, I can guarantee they
think of you.
Speaker 2 (42:26):
I thought Alexis kavoodle effect was car accidents.
Speaker 1 (42:31):
Got a couple of them. That's good. I want to
keep on their toes. It could be me right there, definite.
Speaker 2 (42:37):
Maybe jose yours is bowls of ramen effect.
Speaker 3 (42:40):
See that by soup dumpling video game, any sort of
food blog.
Speaker 7 (42:45):
Maybe colorful lights. I forgot what we were talking about.
Speaker 2 (42:50):
It everything, but try the kovoodle method. You'll either land
yourself a new boyfriend or girlfriend, or possibly a restraining order.
Speaker 4 (42:59):
Either way.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
This shot, that's a TikTok click shot. Let's get to
your final TikTok click shot, which was posted by someone
named the Kiffness, and he's had This guy has had
viral videos before where he takes random dog and cat
videos and remixes them with popular songs. So today he's
(43:23):
using a French bulldog named Walter singing Ryan Gosling song
from the Barbee movie. I'm just canting now the start,
you're gonna hear a little bit of gossling just to
set the tone for it, and then Walter takes over. Okay,
here we go and where else? Sad testife.
Speaker 8 (43:58):
I'm having a conversation, conversing me again. You're getting me
in trouble.
Speaker 7 (44:17):
I follow Walter.
Speaker 3 (44:19):
I put celebrity sleeves up on our website every day,
and I actually blew out all of the actual headlines
of celebrities and featured that dog.
Speaker 2 (44:28):
Walter is our new Kvoodle of webs The video got
two point nine million views.
Speaker 1 (44:35):
It deserves more. Yeah, nothing to I mean, sorry Jeffrey
for your parody song.
Speaker 2 (44:41):
I don't compare it to Walter, but the verdict is
Walter is enough. Those are your TikTok stories for the day.
Speaker 5 (44:50):
Brooking Jeffrey in the morning, we got a.
Speaker 2 (44:58):
New player, Alyssa the Phone, who is the mother to
two daughters aged one and five years old.
Speaker 1 (45:05):
Are you in it right now?
Speaker 2 (45:07):
They were apparently born on the same day those four
years apart. But she does feel bad because her kids
are constantly sick and she brings them into school and
daycare anyway, Oh do you do that all the time? Right?
You know what? It's their issue. The teachers will heal.
Speaker 7 (45:25):
Yeah, okay, so now we know where COVID started.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
You know what's sad is I just got off the
phone with my daughter who's homesick. But my husband he
does video shoots, so my daughter's literally laying in the
back of the car right now.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Yes, well, this isn't about you and your family book.
This is about Alyssa and her family. So Alyssa, welcome
to the show.
Speaker 5 (45:42):
Hi.
Speaker 3 (45:42):
Everyone, who's the easiest of the daughters?
Speaker 1 (45:46):
The older or the younger?
Speaker 2 (45:48):
Ah, the younger right now?
Speaker 1 (45:49):
Oh, it is easier.
Speaker 10 (45:51):
Yeah, I mean the oldest just talks a lot and
takes a lot of space.
Speaker 1 (45:57):
Space.
Speaker 2 (45:59):
Maybe try not to teach the younger one how to talk. Yeah,
it'll never talk back to.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
You every time she tries to walk. Push her down.
Speaker 2 (46:06):
Yeah, we're gonna raise some easy children for you. Alyss
Okay Brooks leaving the studio, So let's go over the
rules real quick. You got thirty seconds to answer as
many questions as possible. If you don't know when, you
could say pass, But you do have to beat her
outright if you want to win. Are you ready? Good luck?
Your time starts now. Today is National Ramen Noodle Day.
(46:26):
Which country eats the most instant ramen per year? The US,
Japan or China?
Speaker 4 (46:32):
Japan.
Speaker 2 (46:32):
What is the only state that borders three Canadian provinces?
Speaker 12 (46:37):
Washington? Oh, Washington.
Speaker 2 (46:38):
The sun is made up of two elements helium and
what else?
Speaker 5 (46:43):
I don't know?
Speaker 14 (46:44):
Pass.
Speaker 2 (46:44):
The leopard is the number one most endangered species in
the world. What African mammal rake? Second? What do you
call the number below the line of a fraction?
Speaker 14 (46:57):
The denominator?
Speaker 2 (46:58):
All right? Good? Work there. Lissa Brook's going to come
back into this studio. How do you feel like you
did there? Not great, I will say some of the
questions are a little bit tougher this time around. But
let's look at the phone screen. It says that you
plan events and meetings and you don't really get to
have fun, but you get to see everybody else have fun.
Speaker 14 (47:19):
Yes, exactly, because then by the time you get home,
you're just exhausted.
Speaker 7 (47:24):
Okay, so you're having vicarious fun.
Speaker 12 (47:26):
Yes, yes, of course you're in a bad.
Speaker 3 (47:28):
Planner, and you really don't want to throw any birthday
parties for your own kids because that's what you do
you in your day job, right, Yes.
Speaker 10 (47:35):
And then the expectation for when you do your own
party is so high for everyone's.
Speaker 1 (47:41):
So you're screwed either way.
Speaker 2 (47:44):
Brooke, it's your turn. Are you ready?
Speaker 1 (47:45):
I'm ready?
Speaker 2 (47:46):
Your time starts now. Today is National Ramen Noodle Day.
Which country eats the most instant ramen per year? The US,
Japan or China?
Speaker 1 (47:54):
I feel like the US.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
What is the only state that borders three Canadian provinces?
Speaker 3 (47:59):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (48:00):
The sun is made up of two elements helium and
what else?
Speaker 1 (48:04):
Hydrogen?
Speaker 2 (48:05):
The leopard is the number one most endangered species in
the world. What African mammal ranks seconds? What do you
call the number below the line of a fraction.
Speaker 1 (48:16):
Denominator?
Speaker 2 (48:20):
Just in time, we're gonna go over the scoreboard to
check out how you both did with jose heyny Man.
Speaker 6 (48:30):
I hate it when people say that, Elisa, you got
one correct today.
Speaker 2 (48:34):
Oh Man, all right, and.
Speaker 7 (48:38):
Brook Brook gets too.
Speaker 2 (48:43):
She edges you out for the victory today. Sorry about that,
Eliza Day. All right, we need to get these answers in.
It's National Ramen Noodle Day. The country that it's the
most instant ramen per year is China, with forty six
billion packets every year.
Speaker 1 (48:57):
We always want to eating.
Speaker 4 (48:58):
I know, I know.
Speaker 2 (48:59):
The only state that borders three Canadian provinces is Montana,
borders between British Columbia, Alberta, and Saskatchewan. The sun is
mainly made up of two elements, helium and hydrogen. Leopard's
the number one most endangered species in the world. Behind
them is rhinos the second, and the number that's below
(49:19):
the line of a fraction is the denominator, so alyssa. Unfortunately,
it wasn't enough to beat brook today. But the good
news is just for playing you do win a pair
of tickets to see The Barbie Movie in concert, Dance
the Night Away with the Barbie land Sinfignette as they
debut their summer twenty twenty four North American Amphitheater tour.
Speaker 10 (49:39):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (49:40):
Yeah, well, I hope motherhood continues to go well for you, Melissa.
Speaker 12 (49:46):
I hope wish me a lot.
Speaker 1 (49:47):
YEP, that's what I'm doing.
Speaker 7 (49:49):
Luck, we love you.
Speaker 2 (49:51):
Come back and play anytime you want. Okay, letssa, You're
welcome anytime.
Speaker 8 (49:54):
Thank you.
Speaker 7 (49:54):
Love the show girl said they loved me.
Speaker 1 (49:57):
Jeff did I color Melissa instead of all of a sudden.
Speaker 10 (50:00):
Yeah, it happens all the time.
Speaker 2 (50:03):
We've all messed up your name by Clarks. Have a
good day. We're gonna do wind drugs Block the same
time
Speaker 5 (50:10):
Tomorrow, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Hosts And Creators
Brooke Fox
Jeffrey "Young Jeffrey" Dubow
Alexis Fuller
Jose Bolanos
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