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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, we got a brand new full show for you
to start your Monday.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Thanks for being here at Brook and Jeffrey in the morning,
we got to do a second day coming.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Up, new Loser line on the way. We got some lasers.
I mean it's all gonna be good.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Yeah, and we always love to start with some of course,
wonderful listener feedback from people who leave comments that could
be on YouTube on Spotify. Maybe you texted into the
number seven eighty five two. What do we got today,
alexis all right?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Williams.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
By the way, don't text.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Did I say it wrong?
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Bad?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
It's Monday. Did I miss a number?
Speaker 4 (00:30):
Yeah? It's seven eight five nine two.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Oh yeah, okay, you know in my head I got
the number. No, it's important, Williams.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Ben James said, Brooke, can you tell us why your
dad said never trust a plumber. I feel like you've
said it enough times over the years that we deserve
to know why. I think my dad, Oh so, my
dad's an electrical contractor. He owned his own business of
like you know what, most you only ever had like
three employees.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
So Fox Electric woot woo. I think he just has had.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Terrible experience, is with plumbers in his forty plus years ago,
and he's always told me that anyone who chooses.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
To work with crap.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
Oh there sus.
Speaker 5 (01:09):
Basically yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
There's sus. Don't I go.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
I mean that was a lot and I'm sorry. If
you're a plumber, I bet you're a good person.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
If you're a trustworthy plumber comment.
Speaker 5 (01:17):
Yeah, let us know, defend yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Yeah, yeah, defend yourself. Sorry about that said. All right,
let's get this full show started.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
They say in life you need to find your passion.
Oh yeah, something you're really good at and stick to it. Yeah,
it's brooking Jeffrey in the morning. And some people takes
their whole life to figure it out, while others find
their calling at ten years old. Oh my, that's the
case with a little British boy named Cooper Japan.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Dude, please tell me we're going to hear from the
little British boy.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
I absolutely will.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
Oh oh my goodness.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
Because Cooper figured out a few years ago that he
had a unique skill, the ability to sound exactly like
a seagull.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
This is gonna take you so far, Cooper.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
He took his talents to Chesterfield, where they host the
annual Seagull Sounding Competition.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
Oh how many of his girlfriends did he bring?
Speaker 6 (02:17):
So many trips around that Seagle festival.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Cooper got up on stage and that's where he let
his inner seabird shine.
Speaker 7 (02:27):
Here's the audio, the range that hell, he did it
(02:49):
in two octaves, so beautiful?
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Did he win?
Speaker 8 (02:53):
Well?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
The story doesn't end with Cooper because his seven year
old sister Shallby also believes she has the gift of screech.
Let's hear her performance at the Seagull Sounding Show.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
Wait a minute, it's like.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
The baby of the.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
Was more of a sparrow to me.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
Now, I will say. Cooper ended up taking first place,
winning the competition with an unheard of eighty seven point
score from the Wow.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
You saying that gives me chills.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Meanwhile, his sister Shelby got fourth place at still respectable.
So both of them went home with metals, along with
a hamperful of crisps. Okay, that's how brit say potatoes did?
Speaker 1 (03:49):
They throw them up in the air just like they were.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
And the ground. They also got a six pack of
chocolate fizzy drinks. But it just shows there's no talent,
too small, skill, too strange to earn you eternal fame.
This is just the inspiration we needed for the shock
collar question of the day with our digital producer, a
thirty year old American man with the spirit of a
(04:14):
ten year old British boy's right. Jake is his name?
You know what to do?
Speaker 4 (04:18):
Give us a single jake.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
I'm said, I miss as yours festival, but happy single
DeMaio everyone. It's the only holiday where Americans proudly celebrate
a battle they definitely didn't fight in with tequila they
definitely can't handle. Yeah, it's a magical day where white
people start rolling their rs and taco bell sales skyrocket
(04:43):
like it's the Fourth of July and Guadalajara. But behind
all the tacos and tunes and tipsy text to your
ex there's actually a real history and culture behind the celebration. No,
so today we're gonna find out who knows their facts
from their flautas. During a s Cinco de Drinko edition
of twenty of twenty or plenty evente, maybe you guys
(05:11):
say number one through twenty. I'll give you a question
about Sinco to Mayo. It could be about the food,
the history, traditions. Just answered correctly, and you can stay
in the game. We'll start with the woman who you
can always count on for Cinco, Margo Rita's Alex, I
gotta go Sinco.
Speaker 9 (05:26):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Only one, that's a good point.
Speaker 5 (05:28):
Number five alexis how many pounds of avocados are consumed
during Cinco to MYO weekend each year? Is it twenty
forty or eighty million pounds?
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Million?
Speaker 2 (05:40):
God, I feel like I could put down just like,
is this all over the whole leg Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:44):
Collectively around the world.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
It's justin Brooks House, you know, not just GUACAMOLEA you
could be avocado in a different sense.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
What if people are just having avocado toast for breakfast, don't.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Even know contributing, Which is why I'm going the million,
one million, eighty million.
Speaker 5 (06:05):
She's trying to sneak about it. She's very smart.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
Eight million. It goes from twenty eight minutes.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Okay in the middle, forty twenty million.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
Like she says, forty million pounds a vocados are consumed
on Sinco to Myle weekend.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
It was eighty millions.
Speaker 5 (06:24):
It's a big weekend for the big green fruit. Yeah,
brook it's your turn. Cinco was off the board, all right, oh, Joe, Okay,
I only know Cinco is that eight Brook? The reason
we celebrate Cinco Tomyo was back in eighteen sixty two,
Mexico defeated the French against all odds to keep its territory.
What was the name of that famous battle. I'll give
(06:46):
you a hint.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
It was the Battle of the Battle of Pueblo.
Speaker 10 (06:53):
Brook.
Speaker 5 (06:53):
I'm going to give you this, It's the Battle of Puebla.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Well, that's because I'm a white girl. He has terrible Spanish.
Speaker 5 (06:59):
I did count that in My ds.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Are so embarrassed of me constantly.
Speaker 5 (07:04):
Jose, five and eight are off the board.
Speaker 4 (07:06):
Okay, let's go.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
Who know number one? Jose? The world's largest margarita was
created in twenty eleven. It was a ten thousand, five
hundred gallon drink called the Lucky Rita.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
What they made it.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Using over two thousand gallons of just tequila and it
looked more like a colorful swimming pool. Where was it made?
Was it Los Angeles, Las Vegas or Miami?
Speaker 9 (07:31):
MA?
Speaker 4 (07:31):
I could see this in Miami.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
But when you say lucky, yeah, that's the big hands.
Speaker 11 (07:35):
I think of the place I go to to be
unlucky and lose all my money.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
I'm gonna say Vegas.
Speaker 5 (07:40):
He says, Las Vegas. Good use of deduction. Jose Lucky
does mean Vegas. Brook and Jose are still in. Jeffrey,
were over to you? One, five and eight are.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Taken Contrse fourteen, Jeffrey.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Certain food and drink sales spiked so much on may
Fit that some restaurants double their output. Tell me the
number one selling food ordered and cocktail on Cinco to Mayo.
I think it's and cocktail.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
I mean, isn't that so simple?
Speaker 3 (08:09):
The cocktail has gotta be in margarita.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
But the food, there's so many different.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Options, but they're just like the easiest one.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
The taco is the simplest one. I'm a burrito boy
a really good. I'm gonna go with what people are saying,
saying tacos and Marge, jeff.
Speaker 5 (08:29):
One hundred and eighty five thousand margaritas are consumed per
hour on Sinco to Maya Brook. It's your turn, okay,
dos Brook. The largest festival celebrating Sinco happens in la
with seventy thousand plus people, but in Arizona they celebrate
a little different, where hundreds wear sombreros and do what
special activity.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Okay, so we're thinking Mexico culture.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
You're thinking Arizona culture. I think the Mexican culture is
the sombreros.
Speaker 12 (08:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
So if we're going Arizona, they're gonna like battlesnake. I'm
gonna ride horses.
Speaker 5 (09:05):
Jake goes for riding horses. That's incorrect. Big skydiving culture
in Arizona, really big open spaces there, because nothing says
honoring military victory like jumping out of a plane and
sall yeah that boys have one Today's edition out.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Twenty Alright, so I think both the girls are getting
shocked together today while singing Living Levita Loca by Ricky Martin.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Better not mess up?
Speaker 12 (09:34):
Okay, pressure ready, Yeah, upside inside out, She's living Levida Loca.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Shampool you down.
Speaker 5 (09:47):
That was really good.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Yeah, one of you was really good. The third Margarita
was hitting near That means that shot collar question of
the day is done. We're going to do a phone
tap coming up right after this.
Speaker 9 (10:00):
Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning, and I want
you to ask yourself, would you rather start off your
day with a hot cup of coffee? Or a fistful
of spicy tacos.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Oh, I mean I'm not usually I haven't tried a
spicy morning taco.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Yeah you know what I say? Why not both?
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Because it's spicy taco.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
It's sinkle to myo baby. To celebrate, five hour Energy
just announced a new collaboration with the Mexican restaurant Chained
Taco John's to create two new products. One is a
caffeinated mango habanero hot sauce that you can pour over
your tacos.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Wait, it's like this caffeinated caffeine in it.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
The other a two ounce spicy shot of five hour
energy so you can party all night long. I'm shown
the photos of them to my cost here. We'll put
those up on the Brook and Jeffrey Instack.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (11:02):
You're the five hour energy guy, Jeff Like, you're the
guy who drinks it every year.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
I am so excited because I can finally get insomnia
and indigestion. And actually I know a lot of people
like to pour their five hours into their drinks. Call
it stacking. It's perfect. Pour a spicy five hour energy
into your spicy mark today. Okay, really challenge yourself It's
(11:25):
not the first time the five hour has done something
like this, though. Back in twenty twenty four, they came
out with a caffeinated barbecue sauce for Fourth of July.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
It sounds like they need to come out with caffeinated tombs.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
You're gonna need it. But the sauces and the shots
are all being sold on the five Hour Energy website
for a limited time in honor of Sinco and just
for our listeners. Today, we're gonna squirt a little salsa
ver Day over the laser for a spicy Sinco edition
of Laser Stories Chile that's coming up next. It's the
(12:02):
radio segment that believes breakfast should travel with you. That's
why it created the TSA approved smart luggage toaster bag.
So while you waited baggage, claim toast a slice of
bread in your carry on. Yeah, where convenience meets class.
Speaker 4 (12:19):
Imagine that in the overhead the whole plane smells like bread.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
I put butter in my purse.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Now order yours today. With Laser Stories, the segment where
we read weird news stories around the globe just like
everyone else does, except we've got a laser as where
the par face layers just don't. This first laser story
is out of Ohio. A rider in an uber recently
called nine to one one because she said the driver
boasted about having illegal drugs stashed in a fake aerosol
(12:44):
can inside of the car today idiots.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Yeah, that's when he doesn't read Who's cool and who's done?
Speaker 4 (12:51):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 13 (12:52):
True.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Five minutes later cop showed up found the vehicle, but
wasn't sure where the guy was because across from the
street was a food truck that was known as a
pit stop for other uber drivers and had about eight
to ten dudes just milling around the area.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Oh okay, waiting for their decks ride with some tacos?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Was the driver which one did? Officers detained first, the
one that was wearing a shirt that said retired drug dealer.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
No, please tell me that guy can't be that dumb.
Speaker 4 (13:21):
That's amazing.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
If it's right, I guess he came out of retirement,
because that was exactly the right guy.
Speaker 8 (13:26):
No.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
He was ided as Robert Rose, and upon searching the vehicle,
they found the can, which was filled with twenty four
grams of meth, along with pills, a meth pipe, a
digital scale packaging baggies, cash and three cell phones.
Speaker 4 (13:44):
Guy's like very organized.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
Now thinking, do you like retired drug dealers throw parties
like you do? It works for retirements.
Speaker 14 (13:53):
Shirt?
Speaker 1 (13:54):
Yeah I didn't get yeahstead of a gold watch.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
Every time you get into an uber now you have
to be like SODI party.
Speaker 4 (14:03):
I want to go to that retirement.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Party that Robert was charged with drug trafficking, possession of
felony drugs and possession of drug parafignia. There was some
good news for him, though. Police allowed him to wear
his retired drug dealers shirt into jail just for street credit.
Speaker 4 (14:20):
That's a great profile picture.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
This next laser story is out of the Friendly Skies.
Speaker 11 (14:25):
Yay.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Ryanair is Ireland's version of Spirit Airlines.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
Yes, I didn't want to say anything.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
And if you didn't know, they up charged for everything,
have the world's smallest seats and are not really known
for their friendly service, you suck.
Speaker 11 (14:40):
Their social media is hilarious, like it is so funny
on purpose.
Speaker 4 (14:44):
Funny on purpose.
Speaker 11 (14:45):
They literally they'll put like someone's face on their plane
and be like, okay, we.
Speaker 4 (14:50):
Know we overcharged, go away, like they just troll their people.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Okay, okay, okay, edit that out.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Or insert a laugh track behind it. That's why when
the millionaire CEO Michael O'Leary showed up to an airport
restaurant in Dublin, the servers knew they had a once
in a lifetime chance. Yes, wait, the ceo CEO of
this company. So Michael ordered wine and prawns as a starter,
then sea bass for his meal. But when his bill
(15:16):
showed up, it came with some unexpected charges, including seven
dollars and ninety five cents for extra legugy. Yes, the
restaurant charged him nine dollars and ninety five cents for
priority seating. Oh and nineteen dollars in ninety five cents
for a reservation in a quiet area.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Call it bags just too big by an inch? Yeah, sorry,
you're gonna have to deport.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
The restaurant even posted a pick of the tab on
Instagram with the caption it was a pleasure hosting you.
I hope you don't mind if we added a few
extra costs to your bill. So it quickly went viral.
Some fans commented, I hope they gave him a window seat.
Another said, apparently he was alone. Next time, if he
brings a companion, you should put him on separate tables
(16:04):
and ask if he'd like to pay extra to sit together.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
I love it on this restaurant. I hope he tipped them.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Michael did get a laugh out of the bill, paid
it with tip, and then he left apparently.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
Dropped any of the extra charges on his airline.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
Okay, apparently the joke was well timed. Has Ryan Air
just added more fees to flying where Now if travelers
check in less than forty minutes before their flight, they
will have to pay an additional one hundred bucks just
to board.
Speaker 14 (16:36):
Wow?
Speaker 3 (16:36):
What because they're funny fun out?
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (16:42):
This next Lazer story is out of Boston. You've heard
about a pay it forward chain when you go through
a drive through, Yeah, yeah, where somebody pays for the
person behind them, and then you just keep that going. Yeah,
I try to.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Pay it backwards.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
No one else does that to me. It's nice, but
it also puts them in a spot where they have
to decide if they're going to keep doing it for
the person.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
I mean, you run the risk of having a family
of eighteen behind you, do you know?
Speaker 8 (17:04):
Well?
Speaker 3 (17:04):
A woman's going viral on TikTok for sharing her experience
of someone paying it backwards.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
Wait expecting them to pay for wait her to pay
for that.
Speaker 4 (17:15):
He took my joke.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
Her name is Samantha and she was at a Duncan
drive through last week and when she pulled up to
the window, the clerk told her that the guy ahead
of her who just left, told them that she would
be paid for his order.
Speaker 5 (17:30):
It's smart.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
I've always wondered, like, what are the vagan and not
paid workers?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Shouldn't let that guy.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
In the caption to her video, she said to the
random guy in front of me who lied to the employee,
I hope you have the day you deserve it. Samantha
later posted a follow up where she clarified that she
did not pay for his order and the Duncan employees
were very cool about it, even though they were frustrated
that the guy had essentially stole his coffee.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Yeah, he still got it for free.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
She also shared video of her trying to restore goodness
in the worlds by going back to that Duncan and
paying for the person behind her, But that person refused
and kept honking their horn because the entire process was
just taking too long.
Speaker 4 (18:15):
Yeah it happens.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
Speaking of a long process, this guy decided he needed
to get up off his couch and go to the
bathroom last Tuesday.
Speaker 1 (18:22):
Oh I bet that took a while.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
He's only halfway there, Oh my goodness, and he just
realized he left the TV on it. Now he's got
a decision to make. That sound means Laser Stories has
come to an end of the day. We'll do it again,
same time.
Speaker 9 (18:37):
On Wednesday, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
At this point, almost nothing can surprise us when we
check our morning show voicemail machine, except for today when
one guy called to say he made date night plans.
And when I say plans plural, I mean lots and
lots and lots of plans. Also, ladies, what's the worst
(19:03):
thing a guy could say to you mid makeout?
Speaker 5 (19:06):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (19:06):
What the heck? U? One dude decided he should probably
apologize for the embarrassing one word thing he lets slip
out instantly ruined the chemistry. And you'll understand why when
we play their messages during a brand new Loser line
right after this, would you is this.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
The right number?
Speaker 9 (19:28):
It's a line goodby.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
Just call me back if you haven't heard the Loser
line before. It works like this, Let's say a guy
approaches you while you're out at the club and uses
this charming pickup line on you, a gorgeous let me
guess your nickname must be yogurt because for some strange reason,
I want to spoon.
Speaker 8 (19:48):
You right now?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Is that so sweet?
Speaker 3 (19:53):
Whatever you do, do not mock him for already being
in a committed relationship with his creatine. Instead, tell him
that maybe you two should meet by the squad rack
later and Sean, you've got more moves than his battery
powered protein shaker. And that's when you give him the
digits to the loser line. So hopefully he leaves you
an awkward voicemail that we can play on the air,
(20:14):
voicemails like this one.
Speaker 13 (20:17):
Hey, it's so, I went ahead and booked us a
reservation for next Thursday night and Friday, you know, just
in case Thursday goes really really well.
Speaker 9 (20:34):
Oh.
Speaker 13 (20:34):
Also, I reserved a tandem kayak for Saturday.
Speaker 15 (20:38):
Morning in case you stay over and we want to
do a little fun activity together.
Speaker 10 (20:46):
You know. So I hope you like nature and close
physical proximity to handsome fellows.
Speaker 8 (20:57):
So anyway, let me know bye.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
You know, women complain about men who don't plan thing.
Speaker 3 (21:10):
He's not just a planner. He is confident that your
one date is going to roll into four straight days
of NonStop fun.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
Well and how sweet, like you're gonna stay the night
on a Friday night.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
I was thinking it was just a drunk hookup, but
he's got kayaking plans.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
You can make it till Tuesday. I have a surprise.
It's close physical proximity.
Speaker 14 (21:33):
Bryan, this is.
Speaker 11 (21:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 14 (21:39):
I'm just whatever.
Speaker 16 (21:40):
I'm just gonna I'm just gonna put this out there.
I was just thinking, you know what if hypothetically a
person wanted to ask another person out for coffee and uh,
you know, maybe that other person be like, sure, coffee
and open to seeing where that goes. And then like
(22:05):
maybe that first person hypothetically would just really enjoy spend
some time with you and uh maybe going back to
her play hypothetically. And I'm just to bring out there,
so anyway, if you're if you're interested, maybe hypothetically give
(22:28):
that another person like a DM or whatever.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
She really needs to look up what it means to
put something out there. Yeah, she did not put it
out there.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Do you feel like that was the first message that
she left? Why do I feel like that was take
number twelve before she got to you know what, maybe,
hypothetically speaking, I thought.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
She was going to apologize at the end.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
I don't know why, just giving a Lexus vibe yea,
and she was definitely gonna say I'm sorry. I'm a
big fan of the asking for a friend saying yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
But remember we are on YouTube, our shows on TikTok
and so all the other podcast platforms at Brook and Jeffrey,
where you can hear all of our second dates. Our
phone taps are awkward calls and your favorite loser line
messages just like this one.
Speaker 10 (23:17):
Hey, Grace, Sorry I was I was just daydreaming a
little bit. I had to call you, and I just
had to tell you that I can't stop thinking about
your elbows. I don't know if anyone's ever told you this,
but you've got super elegant joint structure, Like no joke.
(23:37):
These are top to your elbows you have, you know,
they just they've been so naturally And some people they
have elbows that are there all sharp and jagged, a
little angry knees, but yours, oh my god, they're like
real elegant princess elbows.
Speaker 8 (23:58):
Anyway, call me if you have some room in.
Speaker 10 (24:01):
Your schedule to hang out a little bit elbow room,
I should probably stop.
Speaker 15 (24:11):
Okay, yeah, you thought that.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Was kind of I'll go.
Speaker 5 (24:16):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
I kind of liked it. I have weird elbows. So
she's like, yeah, is this.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
A thing though, where instead of being like, hey, are
you a boot guy? You're a butt guy, they're like, oh,
you're an elbow guy. Is that trend?
Speaker 2 (24:30):
It's kind of nicer to have those complimented than anything else,
to be honest, next.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
Thing in Cosmo magazine that have elbow models showing off
on page one.
Speaker 8 (24:39):
Yeah for shows.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
Really check out my eyebows.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Coming around on this trend. Actually, I hope this becomes
a thing.
Speaker 15 (24:50):
Hey, it's we we met last night at the bar
with the like the weird bathroom writing thing. I think
it was called the penguin. No right, it was puffing.
(25:11):
I don't know, some arctic animal. But I just wanted
to say sorry again the whole the accidental thing, like
hold out the mom thing right, calling you mom?
Speaker 10 (25:31):
Yeah, I am sorry about that.
Speaker 15 (25:36):
I did not mean to call you mom, obviously, I
just I'm going through some.
Speaker 10 (25:42):
Right now.
Speaker 15 (25:43):
But I only said it because it's like you have
like the exact same color hair, all right, but that's
it seriously so anyway, but yeah, it was cool and
I have fun, So you know.
Speaker 9 (25:59):
Call me.
Speaker 3 (26:01):
Wow one passionate night in a bar bathroom in the
guy calls you mom, and then you're gonna give him
a fake number. Talk about a bad choice.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
You know, jeff, I know that there's some guys that
like daddy issues.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Yeah, no, women like mommy issues.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
Called somebody their mother in makeout. I knew you would.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
Hits too close to home.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
Give him in like three or four chances before you
reject him. Make sure you subscribe to the Brook and
Jeffrey YouTube where you can hear all of your favorite
loser line clips of the week. We highlight them right
there for you, and we're gonna do a phone tap.
Speaker 9 (26:36):
Coming up Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning, Brook.
Speaker 3 (26:39):
And Jeffrey in the Morning, And in today's prank Call,
we reach out to a guy who just created his
very first online dating profile and what he wrote wasn't
exactly working out for him, so he turned to chat
GPT for help on what to say, which is fine,
nothing wrong with that unless you tell your buddies about it. Yeah,
(27:01):
then your buddies are going to reach out to us,
and then we're going to act like we're from the
dating app, and we're going to say we caught you
like we did in your phone tap right now another.
Speaker 8 (27:18):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Hi?
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Is this jim.
Speaker 15 (27:22):
Uh? It is calling Grey.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
I'm calling from the app Heart Dating. My name's Hilda,
Hilda Climb.
Speaker 8 (27:30):
Okay, how can I help you?
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Well, we noticed that you recently created a new profile
with us in the last forty eight hours.
Speaker 15 (27:38):
Great, cool, So what why would you be calling me
about that?
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Well, unfortunately, your page was flagged by our system as
being plagiarized.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
That's funny. How you don't know.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Yah, I'm with the integrity team and we ran your
profile through our originality scanner.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Oh, it's an eighty seven.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Percent identical match to a chat GBT generated romance prompt.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
Caught you what?
Speaker 2 (28:10):
Yeah, the profile's right in front of me and your
opening line is I'm just a husky laugh looking for
my soulmate who loves hot sauce and NPR.
Speaker 14 (28:21):
Okay, I don't understand what's wrong with.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
That hot sauce and NPR.
Speaker 3 (28:26):
Yeah, I mean those things aren't mutually exclusive.
Speaker 14 (28:29):
I don't understand what you're trying to imply.
Speaker 9 (28:31):
Sir.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
Again, I'm with the integrity team, and based on your photos,
I highly doubt you even own hot sauce.
Speaker 5 (28:40):
What do you mean I look like I don't.
Speaker 9 (28:41):
Are you trying?
Speaker 14 (28:42):
Is it because I'm white?
Speaker 1 (28:43):
But we're not here to judge.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
At our company, we require at least two honest, human
generated cringe lines per profile.
Speaker 14 (28:51):
So I'm not cringe enough as the issue.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
You're not human enough?
Speaker 8 (28:55):
What do you mean I'm not human enough? How could
I not be human?
Speaker 14 (28:59):
You're talking to me now, Okay.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
We're going to lower the emotion and we'll just rewrite
it together. So let's ditch the husky laughline you stole.
Speaker 14 (29:08):
They didn't steal it.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
No one's buying it, and I'm going to replace it
with you cry uncontrollably during Pixar movies like that?
Speaker 15 (29:17):
What?
Speaker 1 (29:18):
No, that sounds real.
Speaker 14 (29:20):
It's not real.
Speaker 8 (29:21):
That's not true. I don't even watch Pixar movies.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
Okay, then you tell me how would you make a
woman an emotional sandwich?
Speaker 9 (29:28):
What?
Speaker 8 (29:28):
What kind of question is that?
Speaker 5 (29:30):
Why?
Speaker 8 (29:30):
I don't even understand why I'm having to do this, sir.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
I'm driving the train here, so please just chew two,
get on board. Do we need to have some sort
of raw emotional sentence?
Speaker 8 (29:40):
You're going to get raw emotion.
Speaker 5 (29:42):
Rat understand.
Speaker 8 (29:42):
Why is such a hasshle?
Speaker 2 (29:44):
That is exactly what we're going towards. Yeah, it doesn't
even need punctuation.
Speaker 8 (29:48):
Lady, you're not lady. You are just not getting it.
Speaker 14 (29:50):
This is my dating profile.
Speaker 8 (29:52):
I can say what I want to say.
Speaker 14 (29:53):
I don't need you to monitor it.
Speaker 9 (29:55):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
This is taking a lot of time, so I'm just
gonna put it in myself.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Let's see here.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
No, oh, do not do that.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
I once fell in love with a barista because she
spelled my name right.
Speaker 9 (30:07):
What.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Oh that's human, that's messy. It's hot. Women are gonna
love it.
Speaker 8 (30:12):
What are you doing that makes me sound like some
kind of beta. I'm not some cry baby boos.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
Oh shut up?
Speaker 8 (30:19):
Oh my god, you tell me to shut up.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
You've got to match with your new profile lines. Hold on,
I'm reading it.
Speaker 8 (30:25):
This is unbelievable.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
It is I never thought you'd matche with anyone.
Speaker 4 (30:30):
Are you seeing me right now?
Speaker 16 (30:32):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Look at this.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
It's a vegan who lives out of her van. Two
miles from your location.
Speaker 8 (30:37):
I don't want that. I'm not looking to match with
some crazy, homeless hipie girl.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Should I respond to her and say you're down to
meet up with the organic pea patch to drinkombucha and
discuss political strife.
Speaker 5 (30:47):
Absolutely not.
Speaker 14 (30:48):
I don't want your health. I didn't ask for your health, and.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
If we don't change it, we're gonna have to put
a disclaimer on there with a badge that says this
profile has been lightly AI enhanced.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
Just hard to get rid of.
Speaker 8 (31:01):
Forget this, this is stupid. I don't want it, you
know what, Just delete my profile. I don't want to
be involved in any Actually.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
That's the one thing I can't do.
Speaker 3 (31:09):
Oh my god, because I'm really with.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
The radio show Brook and Jeffrey in the morning and
I don't work for the dating app at all.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Hold right, it's a break phone call.
Speaker 5 (31:21):
Every buddy set.
Speaker 8 (31:22):
You up, kidding me crazy run.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
He wanted us to prank you because you've been using
chat GPT to spice up your dating profile, and he
called you out for it.
Speaker 8 (31:34):
I can't believe you, guys, did I feel so stupid?
Speaker 1 (31:36):
I can't believe you use AI to make up who
you are.
Speaker 8 (31:40):
Well, I put in real stuff.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Yeah, hot sauce and NPR You al right.
Speaker 8 (31:44):
Why wouldn't I be able to do both of those?
And how on earth do I look like?
Speaker 14 (31:47):
I don't use hot sauce?
Speaker 1 (31:49):
You look like pepper's too spicy for you.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
You know how white that is?
Speaker 2 (31:52):
That is so wake up every morning with low taps
weekday mornings on the twenties, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
I think there's fewer and fewer rom com movies being
made now just because people don't meet in real life anymore.
Speaker 4 (32:10):
I mean, that's true.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
It's just not believable. And you can't have a realistic
romantic scene with a drunk dude at two am sliding
into a hot girl's.
Speaker 9 (32:21):
D MS or can you.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
I don't know, just thinking about it, job.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
Maybe maybe someone should try it. But that's why today's
call was so rare, because one of our listeners says
he turned a super awkward moment in real life into
an actual meet cute. It seemed almost too perfect to
be true.
Speaker 4 (32:45):
Way, what do you do after you meet then?
Speaker 3 (32:47):
I don't know, I don't know. We're yeah, let's hear
it in your brand new second date update, right, after
this second date updated. There's a lot of fun things
in life that begin with the word street, street, street, magic, street, Tacos.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Okay, Jeff meets.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
Yeah street walkers, right, I feel like I do that.
I walk down a lot of streets Tacos. Well, today
we're going to talk to a street dater.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
Jeff's like, why are people giving me money for?
Speaker 3 (33:24):
I must have really good hair today. But again, this
guy says he's a street dater. He met someone wal well,
not stereotypically, but he met somebody while out on the street. Oh, okay,
that's what I meant. His name is Drew street Walker. Yeah,
technically Drew street Walker too.
Speaker 8 (33:41):
I think I walked the streets about as much as
everybody else around here.
Speaker 3 (33:44):
Ye, he's a humble street walk Jeff's neighborhood. Okay, we
should probably using But apparently you met somebody while just
walking out and about how did that happen?
Speaker 8 (33:56):
Yeah, I was at a bookstore locally, and I like
to read. So I'm leaving the bookstore and i'm you know,
I have my face buried in the book because I'm
walking and I knock into this woman.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Oh that's kind of a cute. You know, it's sound
like out of a movie. The bookstore is involved.
Speaker 8 (34:12):
Clumsy, her bag fell. I helped her, and then I
gave her a little flirt.
Speaker 4 (34:16):
Wait, wait, did ever really happen in slow motion?
Speaker 1 (34:18):
I think he's joking about that part.
Speaker 3 (34:19):
I know, I imagine the bag falling. He grabbed it,
he picked it up, he ran No, gotcha, you just
knocked her bag out of her hand. By accident.
Speaker 8 (34:30):
Yeah, by accident.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
Oh, you really did knock the bag over.
Speaker 5 (34:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 8 (34:34):
We bumped into each other. It was a pretty big bump,
and you know, everything just kind of flew all over
the place. I helped There's some stuff hell out of
her bag, and I said, you know, it's usually old
ladies I knock over and then I just move on.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
And funny he beats him with her. I get the joke.
Speaker 4 (34:53):
I kind of liked it.
Speaker 8 (34:54):
So we then we started walking and we started going
in the same direction. So I just started to do
and a little more like joking, like you following me?
And she's like, no, you following me? And we laughed again,
trying to build like a little rapporto.
Speaker 11 (35:08):
Bro, like you're turning like kind of a bad situation
or a weird situation into like something positive.
Speaker 1 (35:13):
What point were you able to get her name?
Speaker 8 (35:15):
I did ask her name, but we walked a little more,
and we would love to know the name.
Speaker 4 (35:21):
She's like, don't tell anybody what my real name is.
Speaker 8 (35:23):
Oh that name is Sonia.
Speaker 3 (35:25):
Okay, so you and Sonya are just accidentally walking in
the same direction and kind of flirting with each other.
Speaker 8 (35:30):
It sounds like, yeah, we eventually get to a park
and we start walking through the park.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
What when you got into the park. Is that when
you took her bag?
Speaker 8 (35:38):
Then that's when I knocked her over and ran Okay, yeah.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
Gotcha more escape routes than here.
Speaker 4 (35:47):
Up a tree.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Did you really have to go to the same way
or were you just pretending so you could shock plants?
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Like you both just had free time to keep walking.
Speaker 4 (35:55):
Oh yeah, that's true too.
Speaker 8 (35:56):
I walked through that park all the time. Yeah. No,
this isn't like the fairy. I was going in that
direction anyway. So it is just like a very good
meet cute Okay. Eventually we came across a sketch artist
and he flagged us down. He was like, hey, you
guys want to get a picture. You thought we were
a couple.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
Wait, did you get a character drive?
Speaker 8 (36:15):
Oh look I was down, but she wasn't. Okay, I
think first, I think was freaked down.
Speaker 3 (36:21):
Yeah, it sounds there's so many like perfect things that
are happening to you along the way on this short walk.
You didn't set this whole thing up. It sounds like,
how could he do?
Speaker 8 (36:30):
No, I didn't set anything up.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Well, you just have a friend who's like in the
park with a thing, and he's like, I'm just going
to take her this way.
Speaker 8 (36:36):
I didn't say it was a friend. It was just
a sketch artist. He wasn't a friendly.
Speaker 2 (36:41):
The most that would be the most elaborate setup ever.
You accidentally run into somebody and then suddenly you call
your buddy when she's not looking, who happens to be
an artist, to tell him to set up quickly at
the park.
Speaker 4 (36:51):
I really want to sit down with her for forty
five minutes. This stranger.
Speaker 3 (36:54):
I'm just saying. We've heard people that have like orchestrated
all sorts of weird things in order to meet you.
Speaker 4 (37:00):
That's true, but this doesn't sound like that job.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
How long is this walk going on.
Speaker 8 (37:04):
We're about twenty minutes into the walk by the time
she said no to the picture. But halfway through the
park and we got to the end of the park.
It was probably about a half an hour we were
together and I got a good vibe. So I asked
her number to go out, and she gave me a
number and the date just hasn't materialized.
Speaker 2 (37:21):
And said, Okay, have you guys talked via text or
phone call?
Speaker 8 (37:26):
No? Nothing. I've tried to call a few times. I've
lost a few messages.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
I automatically think that she gave you a fake number.
Speaker 3 (37:33):
Oh, there's no response.
Speaker 8 (37:35):
Yeah, it was her voice on the voicemail.
Speaker 5 (37:37):
It's okay, okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
She gave you the numbers. So I'm assuming she's single.
Did you specifically ask her?
Speaker 8 (37:44):
I didn't ask her if she was dating anyone. No,
but I left a few voicemails and she hasn't answered.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
How many yeah?
Speaker 8 (37:52):
Three? Maybe four?
Speaker 11 (37:54):
Oh, Jack, I don't think I called a girlfriend that
many times in one year.
Speaker 3 (37:59):
I think my mom and calls me. He felt the connection, So.
Speaker 4 (38:03):
Whatever, one's different. Some people love being on the phone.
Speaker 3 (38:05):
So I'm glad you take a break from your extensive
book reading in order to help reach out to the show.
And we're going to try and help you call this girl,
what's her name? Sonya? Yeah, sonor Okay, we'll reach We'll
reach out to Sonia and we'll do your second date
update right after this hold on second date update. If
I hadn't read it on the back of a Blockbuster
(38:27):
movie sleeve, I still wouldn't believe it. But an accidental
sidewalk bumping turned into your classic Hallmark street walker love
story again with.
Speaker 1 (38:38):
The term yeah, that's the wrong use.
Speaker 4 (38:41):
We're trying to make it sound better than it is.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
It's not a Hallmark movie. I'll tell you that one.
Speaker 3 (38:45):
It fits in this scenario because our listener Drew accidentally
ran into a woman outside of a bookstore, knocked over
her bag, and then turned that awkward moment into a
twenty five minute stroll through a local.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
Park thirty I believe, I mean, those five minutes are
going to be presious. When it's only a short amount
of time, you have to get fair.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
And it all seems too perfect to be true. And
maybe it was because she's not responding to any of
his messages.
Speaker 4 (39:11):
It's always the park scene. Yeah, ruins something in that.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
I mean he left.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Okay, here's the thing you left. Four voicemails. We have
not asked what was in the voicemails.
Speaker 8 (39:22):
I just told her, Hey, it's me Drew by the park.
You need a lot of guys by the park.
Speaker 11 (39:26):
I mean it's true, not even from the park, like
the guys that's adjacent.
Speaker 3 (39:30):
Maybe she thinks you live in the park after that
that there's a chance though that if she's not responding
to anything, maybe she wasn't even real he was real.
Speaker 8 (39:42):
Are you sure that would make me crazy exactly?
Speaker 1 (39:45):
What could just mean? You have a bad drug habit?
Speaker 4 (39:47):
Yeah, we're from the park.
Speaker 3 (39:49):
Were you microdosing that day? Omark hasn't done that yet.
A microdosing Christmas lead to this? Well, if you over
micro dose?
Speaker 1 (39:57):
Yeah, some of those kids still in the DARE program.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
I signed that contract.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
Let's let's have all the street walkers unite, because we're
gonna call and we're gonna get an answer from this
woman to figure out what actually happened, if she's real,
and hopefully if there's an explanation, a lot of.
Speaker 6 (40:14):
Kids listening who use that term wrong for the next
Christmas the street.
Speaker 3 (40:21):
This is the education you get here. I'm gonna die
of the number.
Speaker 8 (40:23):
Right now here.
Speaker 9 (40:23):
We go.
Speaker 8 (40:34):
Hello.
Speaker 3 (40:36):
It sounds real, jeff, It sounds like a person. Is
this Sonya?
Speaker 14 (40:39):
Yes, this is Sonya.
Speaker 3 (40:41):
Who is this son Hey? Sonya. We're a radio show
called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 14 (40:45):
Good morning, Hi, Hi, Hey, what's this about.
Speaker 3 (40:51):
This is a segment that we do on our show.
It's called a second Date Update, and we're trying to
help out one of our listeners. His name is Drew,
who you met the other day outside of a bookstore.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
Did you just laugh?
Speaker 12 (41:06):
Are you sorry? I just I can't believe that you're
calling about him.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
You remember, remember Drew you talked you over on accident
outside the bookstore?
Speaker 12 (41:16):
Yeah, yeah, I remember Drew.
Speaker 3 (41:18):
Okay, Well that's great because he said there was like
a meet cute type of situation that happened on the
street and then you guys went through a park for
a bit. He left a few messages.
Speaker 12 (41:29):
Yeah, I mean that did happen, and I was actually
open to seeing him again.
Speaker 14 (41:33):
That's for the messages.
Speaker 12 (41:35):
The messages are the problems.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
Well, we asked him about the messages and he basically,
according to him, he said, it was basically, Hey, this
is Drew from the park. Remember I'm Drew.
Speaker 8 (41:45):
Is that what he said.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
Yeah, well, summary interesting.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
Oh no, I'm not curious, like.
Speaker 12 (41:52):
He left me one message that was so ridiculous. I
actually my roommate and I have been like dying laughing
about it. Oh, I actually I wrote it down.
Speaker 2 (42:03):
Well, you wrote down the message because it was that
funny to you.
Speaker 3 (42:07):
Wow, it would it be okay if we know what
the message said.
Speaker 12 (42:10):
Oh, absolutely, I'd love to read it.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
To you, because we haven't. We haven't heard anything about it.
We just know there was a bunch of messages.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
She is delighted to.
Speaker 12 (42:18):
Yeah, she is, okay, So he told me, he said,
I left you a message you didn't respond to, and
I don't like leaving second messages. But I like you.
You're very elegant, You're very attractive. But I don't play
(42:38):
that game. If I don't hear back by three pm.
Speaker 14 (42:44):
Tomorrow, I'm no longer interested.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
Because he called us, Yeah, it didn't mean it.
Speaker 12 (42:55):
Then she goes on to explain why I should call him.
Speaker 1 (42:58):
Well, you should call him some positives. That's good.
Speaker 12 (43:02):
He says, I'm very smart, I'm great in bed, and
I makes a lot of money.
Speaker 4 (43:09):
A something everybody says.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
I mean, it's one of those things. When you say
it's hard to believe.
Speaker 12 (43:18):
It's so, then he says, believe it or not, I'm
a complete catch. I'm one of the only men in
the city that has no issues.
Speaker 4 (43:31):
Yeah, exactly, I'm the best one.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
I have yet to find a person that doesn't have issues.
Speaker 4 (43:37):
Is like a child trying to do reverse psychology.
Speaker 1 (43:39):
Is that finally the end of the message.
Speaker 12 (43:44):
So I don't know what your situation is.
Speaker 14 (43:46):
If you're just insecure, or if you're.
Speaker 12 (43:49):
On medication as way psychologically normal and you haven't called
me because something bad happened in your life and you.
Speaker 14 (43:59):
Just need it a few days.
Speaker 2 (44:01):
Heck is he reject that got a little hinge, so
started un hinge, then it got a little better.
Speaker 1 (44:09):
Now we're back.
Speaker 4 (44:10):
Now we're unhinged again.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
Okay. Yeah, So clearly there was a lot happening in
that message, and it could help to get insight into
what he meant by it.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
Because it's pretty embarrassed right now.
Speaker 3 (44:20):
Maybe because sonya, he is on the other line listening.
We've got Drew waiting to talk to you.
Speaker 8 (44:26):
Oh hey, hey, Sony, hey hey, is there something that
I said that wasn't true? Was there something that I
said on that voice. Now, that wasn't that was a lie?
Speaker 1 (44:37):
What?
Speaker 8 (44:37):
Yeah, you can't say that, dude.
Speaker 4 (44:39):
You're coming to kind of hot? Yeah, a little bit,
I think defensive.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
No apology.
Speaker 12 (44:45):
Well I'm sorry, Drew. I just like we met for
thirty minutes, we didn't even go on a real date.
And then all of this you're going on about how
great you are, and then you start to come for
me and like blame me for not calling you back.
I just found it all to be a little much
for someone that like, I'm so you agree that I'm right.
Speaker 8 (45:03):
So what with the problem? You don't you don't appreciate
being direct. You don't like guys who are direct. I'm direct,
making a lot of money. I'm smart and I'm good
in bed to being direct.
Speaker 1 (45:16):
More and more doubtful talking about.
Speaker 8 (45:19):
You know you're all laughing now, but you won't be
You'll be crying later when I'm out of your life.
That's what's gonna happen if you don't make the right move.
Speaker 4 (45:27):
I got to find out how good you are in bed, bro, So.
Speaker 8 (45:32):
You didn't call me back was really stupid. I mean,
come on, people like me who are good in bed
and smart and stuff. You know, why do you leave
that stupid person is going to give that up?
Speaker 3 (45:44):
I think points.
Speaker 8 (45:48):
You know, you know, in this city there are no men,
and I'm a total catch. You know that I with
him that I don't know.
Speaker 14 (45:56):
I don't know, Drew.
Speaker 12 (45:58):
I feel like the people who are actually good in
bed don't go around talking about how good they are
in bed. Yeah, I'm not getting the best vibes from you,
to be honest, Like it just feels like that.
Speaker 8 (46:09):
You haven't bragged about being good in bed.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
Yeah, well you're not supposed to.
Speaker 1 (46:13):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 3 (46:15):
Listen to any hip hop music they're all about that.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
Are we going to ignore the rest of the text
about what was that?
Speaker 8 (46:23):
I saw her beg her begs. Everything fell everywhere I
saw her meds.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
You read everyone's on medication.
Speaker 8 (46:32):
Yeah, on medication. You sound crazy smart and well read.
Speaker 1 (46:39):
Sony thought you were going to come to Drew.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
This is honestly, this is shocking to be I thought
we were going to come to Drew and.
Speaker 1 (46:45):
You were going to be humiliated that this voicemail was.
Speaker 3 (46:48):
Out there, But like, no, only somebody who's addicted to
meds would be humiliated. He's perfect broke.
Speaker 2 (46:54):
Yeah, with no narcissistic tendencies at all.
Speaker 8 (46:58):
No, I don't clear good, Sonya?
Speaker 3 (47:02):
Was he right? Are you on the verge of tears
right now?
Speaker 12 (47:05):
I'm just really heartbroken that it can't be with this perfect.
Speaker 8 (47:11):
I'm glad that you can finally admit it, Sonya.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
Don't give up yet, because I'm going to give you
a second chance right now by offering to send you
out with the only perfect man in the entire city.
Speaker 1 (47:22):
With no issues, with no issues.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
She would do that.
Speaker 8 (47:26):
If she went on a date, if she called me
back like a normal person, I wouldn't have to do
what happened. But he just called me back like a
normal person.
Speaker 3 (47:33):
Sonya. It's up to you if you'd like to see
him again or not yelled at a little bit, it's
your choice.
Speaker 12 (47:38):
I appreciate the offer, but I really I'm really.
Speaker 14 (47:41):
Not into the narcism.
Speaker 1 (47:43):
Oh wow, that's shocking.
Speaker 3 (47:47):
She's talking about me though there like and I get that,
But what about Drew?
Speaker 1 (47:51):
That was really shocking.
Speaker 12 (47:53):
I say no to Drew also.
Speaker 9 (47:55):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (47:56):
Wow, really, Sonya, I'll tell her with you at all true.
Speaker 3 (48:05):
If this woman can't see how perfect you are, then
she doesn't deserve you.
Speaker 9 (48:08):
Wow.
Speaker 8 (48:09):
Thank you?
Speaker 2 (48:10):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (48:10):
You can't read sarcasm.
Speaker 8 (48:12):
He's really thanking you, jeff I don't read sarcasm.
Speaker 3 (48:16):
Yeah, you hear it, Brooke exactly. Thank you, Drew, thank you.
Speaker 5 (48:22):
He really is perfect, Jeffrey.
Speaker 3 (48:25):
In the morning. I feel like we should have asked
that guy in part one, how confident are you in
getting a date one to ten? Oh my god, I
felt like maybe he was a four going into it.
He would have said he'd like thirty.
Speaker 1 (48:39):
Yeah, here's the thing.
Speaker 2 (48:40):
He acts so confident, But we never brought up the
fact that on message too, he said he'd never be
interested again if she didn't call him back, and yet
he was still on the phone.
Speaker 1 (48:48):
Yeah, still left her more voicemails. Yeah still, I mean,
all of what he was saying it is not believable.
Speaker 4 (48:54):
It's like a guy who doesn't know how to play
the game.
Speaker 11 (48:56):
But someone told him right like, hey, if you ignore
a girl or you're just this.
Speaker 1 (49:00):
And they love ultimatum.
Speaker 3 (49:04):
Yeah, didn't work, and he was totally shocked that she
wouldn't take him up on the opportunity to be he
is a perfect.
Speaker 1 (49:11):
Man, so many options, he'll be fine.
Speaker 11 (49:14):
Ever said they were perfect and turned out to be
like perfect Like, when has George Clooney.
Speaker 1 (49:18):
Been like, oh my god, do you know what he
said this week that was so annoying to me.
Speaker 3 (49:21):
Let's not go into it.
Speaker 5 (49:23):
I don't want to go into it.
Speaker 3 (49:25):
I don't want to go into it. But look, if
our listeners I kind of do. If our listeners want
to take advantage of the perfect man, you can go
check out our Second Date podcast and listen to me
host that.
Speaker 1 (49:36):
Okay, listen text in if you want to know about
the George Clooney dirt all Share.
Speaker 3 (49:42):
We'll talk about it off air, But go check out
our podcast wherever you get yours online at Brooke and Jeffrey.
Speaker 9 (49:47):
Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3 (49:50):
I was on the dark web again last night.
Speaker 1 (49:53):
Stay off the dark Web.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
I just poured myself a glass of red and started
browsing for bargains.
Speaker 1 (50:00):
You started bart you on illegal things there.
Speaker 3 (50:04):
That's how I unwind. They've got lots of good stuff
on there. Old Soviet spy bananas, DIY vasectomy kits.
Speaker 1 (50:13):
That's not smart. I think you should try it.
Speaker 3 (50:15):
Brooks Bank Routing number wish definitely put that in the cart.
Oh yeah, that's there. But I noticed no matter how hard.
I searched there was one thing you can't buy on
the dark web, and that's true love.
Speaker 4 (50:28):
I wish bro take my money.
Speaker 3 (50:30):
I mean quick, sloppy love. Absolutely, they have lots of that,
but real life, changing, head over heels type of love.
The only website that comes even close to giving you
that is Craigslist.
Speaker 4 (50:45):
And you didn't see that coming.
Speaker 3 (50:47):
I know you're doubting it, but we're going to prove
it when we read some of the messages written there
by real life Romeos and Juliet's in a brand new
misconnections right after.
Speaker 9 (50:55):
This kitty Misconnections that was staring.
Speaker 3 (51:00):
There's only two places to find true love in this world.
One is inside of a CVS pharmacy when you lock
eyes while buying extra strength cold sore cream. True love
can wait, oh usually seven to ten business days.
Speaker 1 (51:17):
See both of the issues turn into a warm sword.
Speaker 3 (51:20):
The other is on the pages of craigslist dot org.
We scour that website every week to find the best
misconnections they have to offer, like this first one titled
from Buffet to Bay.
Speaker 5 (51:34):
I like it.
Speaker 3 (51:35):
That's Man for Woman forties east Side Best Western. He says,
I was at the complimentary Continental breakfast the other morning
around eight am.
Speaker 1 (51:45):
Yeah, it doesn't it feel like a score when a hotel.
Speaker 3 (51:48):
Just perusing the pastries, yogurt and cereals. When I saw
you gingerly sliding in through the side door holding two
medium sized tupperware containers. There you were acting like a
sexy Buffean ninja, and that was intriguing.
Speaker 2 (52:07):
So you're taking it homech Oh, Well, I always, I
always put it in my purse for later, but that's
when I'm a.
Speaker 1 (52:14):
Guest, so I feel like it's Yeah.
Speaker 3 (52:17):
I followed as you made your way to the juice bar,
where I watched you pour at least a half gallon
of OJ into a large ziplock bag.
Speaker 1 (52:27):
I don't know. That's a very trusting person with that ziplog.
Speaker 9 (52:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (52:31):
Your brazenness was enamoring so much, so I knew I
had to say something, So I tapped you on the
shoulder and offered you a waffle and a blackened strip
of bacon in exchange for your time to have breakfast
with me.
Speaker 1 (52:47):
She doesn't have time to stay there, She's got to
get in and get out quick.
Speaker 3 (52:50):
You agreed to it as long as I promised that
you could show my room card to security on the
way out that super smart deal. The next few minutes
we laughed over the free buffet stories you had across
this great country of oust Man.
Speaker 1 (53:06):
I bet she's got some good reviews.
Speaker 3 (53:07):
The one about the Lakina and Pensacola still makes me blush.
I can't believe you had to run out so fast
your bathrobe flew off. Anyway, I enjoyed our time and
sharing food with you, even if you weren't legally allowed
to eat at that establishment for the next decade. But
if you see this, reach out and let's brunch again.
(53:31):
That signed Steve, He says. PS. My room was rifled
through shortly after the buffet. I'm assuming it wasn't you.
Speaker 1 (53:40):
That's Steve incidence.
Speaker 3 (53:43):
Your next Craigslist misconnection is titled just leave your child
with Me Woman for Man twenty five daycare center. Oh wait,
she says you. Mid twenties, short brown hair, single dad
with cute rattail popeing out the back of your official
US conductor's train hat a lot, he says me. Daycare worker,
(54:10):
purple flower dress with tattooed eyebrows and piercings. You couldn't
see but could sense were there. Like you said, you
were interested in finding an open spot for your little
man Damien, so I gave you the grand tour. We
flirted in the booknook as I pulled out a special
(54:30):
pop up story from a shelf the kids can't reach. Oh,
you seemed surprised, but also stirred up. Really I could
smell the ceremonies spelled with ana and a y at the.
Speaker 6 (54:46):
End of the they At one point I admitted to
you that I secretly hate children, but I'd give Damiens
special treatment, a daily fee of apple sauce, fruit snacks,
and canned peas, and she even had the cold medicine
into his like he does the rest of the cap.
Speaker 3 (55:09):
It's been two weeks now and I'm a little insulted
you haven't enrolled him yet. But if money's the issue,
I'd be more than willing to give you the dirty
daddy discount. Oh, you just have to give me something
in return.
Speaker 1 (55:22):
Wait a minute, we could have been getting a deal
on daycare. My husband would have just had to like
a dirty.
Speaker 3 (55:27):
Daddy winky face that signed Sangria wool. Would you ever
let somebody named Sangria watch your kid?
Speaker 4 (55:36):
You know I don't know.
Speaker 2 (55:37):
Alcohol names in general are just kind of a red
flag for me.
Speaker 3 (55:41):
Let's go to your final misconnection titled stoked on Stokes
for you, stokes Man for woman, thirty seven Walgreens Pharmacy. Huh,
he says you were the freckled thirties question mark babe
who filled my prescription yesterday was asking.
Speaker 1 (55:59):
Her age the actual pharmacist you're hitting on.
Speaker 3 (56:02):
I almost missed you. Then I did a quick double
take for a second dose of that face. Now that's
a prescription. I want to take double dose of face.
Please smiley face blush emoji.
Speaker 2 (56:15):
I mean, this is why some of my pharmacists people
are still wearing face masks.
Speaker 3 (56:19):
I I was the cute blonde guy wearing the bike
helmet in under armoured tank. First of all, thanks for
not judging me when I picked up that special cream.
It's not what you think.
Speaker 1 (56:33):
It usually always is.
Speaker 3 (56:34):
When you say that, I promise I'm training for the
Peloton Bikethon and need something for those secret war wounds
down below. I don't know about you, but during our
interaction I could feel the tension between us. The bike
helmet has a tendency to do that to the ladies.
Speaker 2 (56:55):
A bike helmet if he's a peloton going anywhere anyway.
Speaker 3 (56:59):
You seem like a woman who appreciates a man like
myself who's clearly dedicated to his hobbies. That's why I'd
like to offer you a one time deal. Tomorrow night.
I'm free between rides for a few hours, and if
you're lucky, I'll let you make me dinner at your place,
Lasagnia for the much needed carbo load. Please, if you
(57:26):
see this message, text me back what strength was the
hemorrhoids cream you gave me so that I know that
it's you that signed Peloton, Mike, they have a minimal strength.
If you ever wonder why the birthrate is declining in
this country, Craigslist misconnections always gives you a hint. And
(57:51):
that was your Craigslist misconnections for the day.
Speaker 9 (57:53):
Brook and Jeffrey in the morning, We've.
Speaker 3 (58:04):
Got a return player, Mike on the phone, who took
an l last time he appeared on this segment, but
he's come back with a theory. He thinks the reason
that he lost is because Brooke might actually be an AI. Mike,
why do you think that.
Speaker 17 (58:25):
She too damn good at this game?
Speaker 2 (58:26):
Oh God, I am too messy as a human to
be an Ai Brook.
Speaker 3 (58:31):
What's your non binary clapback? To prove that you're not
actually a.
Speaker 1 (58:35):
Computer glitch for a one error?
Speaker 3 (58:41):
You broke her my congratulations?
Speaker 9 (58:43):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (58:44):
Yes, Maybe in the future will finally come clean to
our audience about the truth and change it from beat
Brook to beat Bop. All right, you exit for a second.
Let's go over the rules thirty seconds to answer as
many questions as possible. If you don't know when you
could say pass that you have to beat her out right?
If you want to win? Are you ready?
Speaker 8 (59:03):
Ye?
Speaker 3 (59:03):
Can you beat the machine today?
Speaker 9 (59:05):
Mike?
Speaker 3 (59:06):
Let's find out? Good luck? Your time starts now. Today
is Cinco de Mayo celebrating Mexico's victory over what nation France,
Spain or the US Spain. McDonald's introduced the Big Mac
on this day in what decade? The fifties in Spanish?
What body part is your cabasa.
Speaker 10 (59:30):
Hand?
Speaker 3 (59:31):
What is the only state that begins with the letter pen?
In the Legend of Zelda video game franchise, what's the
name of the Princess no Idea? Princess no Idea? That
would be a brilliant actually would be.
Speaker 4 (59:49):
Lost, She's clueless.
Speaker 3 (59:50):
I'm on a quest to find I have no idea.
Let's see, Brook's gonna come back into the studio here,
and this is exciting. It says on my screen her
that Mike is planning a little summer getaway to Costa Rica.
What's your plans for your trip, Mike? You know, it's
just to get away.
Speaker 17 (01:00:09):
Our daughters graduating high school this year, and it's it'll
be a good send off trip.
Speaker 1 (01:00:15):
And are you just crying and crying? She's leaving.
Speaker 17 (01:00:19):
She's going to the freaking U dub So she's going
to be like twenty minutes away.
Speaker 1 (01:00:23):
Oh yeah, until you take her to Costa Rican.
Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
She meets a hot Costa Rican man and suddenly someone's
living in another country.
Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
Dad, I really got to study abroad.
Speaker 3 (01:00:37):
What activities are you planning in Costa Rica?
Speaker 17 (01:00:40):
We're staying at a resort that is essentially set up
for us to stay there the whole time we're there,
but we'll we'll end up doing some excursions. I'm sure
you know what.
Speaker 6 (01:00:51):
I bet if you asked his wife, she would have
a very long list of detailed Probably, Am I right?
Speaker 3 (01:00:57):
Absolutely?
Speaker 8 (01:00:58):
Absolutely? Well?
Speaker 3 (01:00:59):
Maybe could Brook interest you in a few factory tours
while you're visiting.
Speaker 4 (01:01:03):
Oh, I don't want to go.
Speaker 3 (01:01:05):
Into what she's making or the age of the workers there,
but she is very proud of the black market empire
that she has spent so hard buildings.
Speaker 1 (01:01:13):
It totally cool. As long as you're good to sign
an NDA cool.
Speaker 3 (01:01:19):
We'll send you all the info, maybe over email, Mike,
you can look into it. But now we got to
go to brook for her turn. Are you ready?
Speaker 1 (01:01:25):
You're ready?
Speaker 3 (01:01:25):
Your time starts now. Today is Cinco de Mayo celebrating
Mexico's victory over what nation? France, Spain or the US?
Speaker 1 (01:01:34):
It was France.
Speaker 3 (01:01:35):
McDonald's introduced the Big Mac on this day in what decade?
Speaker 1 (01:01:38):
Eighties?
Speaker 3 (01:01:39):
In Spanish? What body part is your.
Speaker 1 (01:01:41):
Cabasa ca besa is your head?
Speaker 3 (01:01:44):
What is the only state that begins with the letter
P Pennsylvania? In the Legend of Zelda video game franchise,
What is the name of the Princess?
Speaker 1 (01:01:53):
Pass?
Speaker 3 (01:01:54):
Shape of You? And Bad Habits are songs by what artists? Okay,
no answer.
Speaker 5 (01:02:02):
Immediately, way too soon.
Speaker 3 (01:02:04):
I didn't hear her saying a crudely quick I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (01:02:08):
I was trying to get in Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:02:10):
Oh my bad Okay answers are in Apparently, let's go
to the scoreboard to see how you did with Jose.
Speaker 8 (01:02:16):
Features like in the.
Speaker 11 (01:02:23):
Whole Studios Dancing Mike, you got one correct today.
Speaker 1 (01:02:28):
I know it was rough, yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:02:31):
And Brock was just get it over with. You got four.
Speaker 3 (01:02:36):
Torch you o today. But to your credit, she is
an ai, so you didn't really sting the chancewer. Let's
go over the answers for everybody. It's Cinco de Mayo
celebrating Mexico's victory over France. McDonald's introduced the Big Mac
on this day in the nineteen sixties. It came out
in nineteen sixty eight. No idea in Spanish. Your cabasa
(01:02:57):
is your head, Mike, be care for when you're in
Costa Rica talking about your cobasin.
Speaker 9 (01:03:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:03:09):
Only state that begins with the letter P is Pennsylvania.
The legend of Zelda video games, and the name of
the princess is Princess Zelda. Nobody knows Little Tricky shape
of you. Bad Habits both songs by the artist Ed Sheeran. So, Mike,
I'm sorry it was not enough to beat Brooke, but
just for playing, we are going to give you a
pair of tickets to see j Balvin at Climate Pledge
(01:03:31):
Arena on May sixteenth.
Speaker 2 (01:03:34):
Heck yeah, well, have fun Costa Rica, and don't cry
too much when your daughter graduates high school.
Speaker 1 (01:03:42):
Okay, it's embarrassing to her. Yes, that's what I mean.
Speaker 3 (01:03:47):
Heym I come back and play again soon. We're gonna
do win Brooks Bucks, same time tomorrow, Rookie Jeffrey in
the morning.
Hey, we got a brand new full show for you
to start your Monday.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Thanks for being here at Brook and Jeffrey in the morning,
we got to do a second day coming.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Up, new Loser line on the way. We got some lasers.
I mean it's all gonna be good.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Yeah, and we always love to start with some of course,
wonderful listener feedback from people who leave comments that could
be on YouTube on Spotify. Maybe you texted into the
number seven eighty five two. What do we got today,
alexis all right?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Williams.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
By the way, don't text.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Did I say it wrong?
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Bad?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
It's Monday. Did I miss a number?
Speaker 4 (00:30):
Yeah? It's seven eight five nine two.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
Oh yeah, okay, you know in my head I got
the number. No, it's important, Williams.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Ben James said, Brooke, can you tell us why your
dad said never trust a plumber. I feel like you've
said it enough times over the years that we deserve
to know why. I think my dad, Oh so, my
dad's an electrical contractor. He owned his own business of
like you know what, most you only ever had like
three employees.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
So Fox Electric woot woo. I think he just has had.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Terrible experience, is with plumbers in his forty plus years ago,
and he's always told me that anyone who chooses.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
To work with crap.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
Oh there sus.
Speaker 5 (01:09):
Basically yeah, okay.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
There's sus. Don't I go.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
I mean that was a lot and I'm sorry. If
you're a plumber, I bet you're a good person.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
If you're a trustworthy plumber comment.
Speaker 5 (01:17):
Yeah, let us know, defend yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Yeah, yeah, defend yourself. Sorry about that said. All right,
let's get this full show started.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
They say in life you need to find your passion.
Oh yeah, something you're really good at and stick to it. Yeah,
it's brooking Jeffrey in the morning. And some people takes
their whole life to figure it out, while others find
their calling at ten years old. Oh my, that's the
case with a little British boy named Cooper Japan.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Dude, please tell me we're going to hear from the
little British boy.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
I absolutely will.
Speaker 4 (01:52):
Oh oh my goodness.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
Because Cooper figured out a few years ago that he
had a unique skill, the ability to sound exactly like
a seagull.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
This is gonna take you so far, Cooper.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
He took his talents to Chesterfield, where they host the
annual Seagull Sounding Competition.
Speaker 4 (02:14):
Oh how many of his girlfriends did he bring?
Speaker 6 (02:17):
So many trips around that Seagle festival.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Cooper got up on stage and that's where he let
his inner seabird shine.
Speaker 7 (02:27):
Here's the audio, the range that hell, he did it
(02:49):
in two octaves, so beautiful?
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Did he win?
Speaker 8 (02:53):
Well?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
The story doesn't end with Cooper because his seven year
old sister Shallby also believes she has the gift of screech.
Let's hear her performance at the Seagull Sounding Show.
Speaker 4 (03:11):
Wait a minute, it's like.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
The baby of the.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
Was more of a sparrow to me.
Speaker 3 (03:22):
Now, I will say. Cooper ended up taking first place,
winning the competition with an unheard of eighty seven point
score from the Wow.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
You saying that gives me chills.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Meanwhile, his sister Shelby got fourth place at still respectable.
So both of them went home with metals, along with
a hamperful of crisps. Okay, that's how brit say potatoes did?
Speaker 1 (03:49):
They throw them up in the air just like they were.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
And the ground. They also got a six pack of
chocolate fizzy drinks. But it just shows there's no talent,
too small, skill, too strange to earn you eternal fame.
This is just the inspiration we needed for the shock
collar question of the day with our digital producer, a
thirty year old American man with the spirit of a
(04:14):
ten year old British boy's right. Jake is his name?
You know what to do?
Speaker 4 (04:18):
Give us a single jake.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
I'm said, I miss as yours festival, but happy single
DeMaio everyone. It's the only holiday where Americans proudly celebrate
a battle they definitely didn't fight in with tequila they
definitely can't handle. Yeah, it's a magical day where white
people start rolling their rs and taco bell sales skyrocket
(04:43):
like it's the Fourth of July and Guadalajara. But behind
all the tacos and tunes and tipsy text to your
ex there's actually a real history and culture behind the celebration. No,
so today we're gonna find out who knows their facts
from their flautas. During a s Cinco de Drinko edition
of twenty of twenty or plenty evente, maybe you guys
(05:11):
say number one through twenty. I'll give you a question
about Sinco to Mayo. It could be about the food,
the history, traditions. Just answered correctly, and you can stay
in the game. We'll start with the woman who you
can always count on for Cinco, Margo Rita's Alex, I
gotta go Sinco.
Speaker 9 (05:26):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Only one, that's a good point.
Speaker 5 (05:28):
Number five alexis how many pounds of avocados are consumed
during Cinco to MYO weekend each year? Is it twenty
forty or eighty million pounds?
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (05:39):
Million?
Speaker 2 (05:40):
God, I feel like I could put down just like,
is this all over the whole leg Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:44):
Collectively around the world.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
It's justin Brooks House, you know, not just GUACAMOLEA you
could be avocado in a different sense.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
What if people are just having avocado toast for breakfast, don't.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Even know contributing, Which is why I'm going the million,
one million, eighty million.
Speaker 5 (06:05):
She's trying to sneak about it. She's very smart.
Speaker 4 (06:10):
Eight million. It goes from twenty eight minutes.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Okay in the middle, forty twenty million.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
Like she says, forty million pounds a vocados are consumed
on Sinco to Myle weekend.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
It was eighty millions.
Speaker 5 (06:24):
It's a big weekend for the big green fruit. Yeah,
brook it's your turn. Cinco was off the board, all right, oh, Joe, Okay,
I only know Cinco is that eight Brook? The reason
we celebrate Cinco Tomyo was back in eighteen sixty two,
Mexico defeated the French against all odds to keep its territory.
What was the name of that famous battle. I'll give
(06:46):
you a hint.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
It was the Battle of the Battle of Pueblo.
Speaker 10 (06:53):
Brook.
Speaker 5 (06:53):
I'm going to give you this, It's the Battle of Puebla.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Well, that's because I'm a white girl. He has terrible Spanish.
Speaker 5 (06:59):
I did count that in My ds.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Are so embarrassed of me constantly.
Speaker 5 (07:04):
Jose, five and eight are off the board.
Speaker 4 (07:06):
Okay, let's go.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
Who know number one? Jose? The world's largest margarita was
created in twenty eleven. It was a ten thousand, five
hundred gallon drink called the Lucky Rita.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
What they made it.
Speaker 5 (07:20):
Using over two thousand gallons of just tequila and it
looked more like a colorful swimming pool. Where was it made?
Was it Los Angeles, Las Vegas or Miami?
Speaker 9 (07:31):
MA?
Speaker 4 (07:31):
I could see this in Miami.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
But when you say lucky, yeah, that's the big hands.
Speaker 11 (07:35):
I think of the place I go to to be
unlucky and lose all my money.
Speaker 4 (07:38):
I'm gonna say Vegas.
Speaker 5 (07:40):
He says, Las Vegas. Good use of deduction. Jose Lucky
does mean Vegas. Brook and Jose are still in. Jeffrey,
were over to you? One, five and eight are.
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Taken Contrse fourteen, Jeffrey.
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Certain food and drink sales spiked so much on may
Fit that some restaurants double their output. Tell me the
number one selling food ordered and cocktail on Cinco to Mayo.
I think it's and cocktail.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
I mean, isn't that so simple?
Speaker 3 (08:09):
The cocktail has gotta be in margarita.
Speaker 4 (08:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
But the food, there's so many different.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Options, but they're just like the easiest one.
Speaker 3 (08:17):
The taco is the simplest one. I'm a burrito boy
a really good. I'm gonna go with what people are saying,
saying tacos and Marge, jeff.
Speaker 5 (08:29):
One hundred and eighty five thousand margaritas are consumed per
hour on Sinco to Maya Brook. It's your turn, okay,
dos Brook. The largest festival celebrating Sinco happens in la
with seventy thousand plus people, but in Arizona they celebrate
a little different, where hundreds wear sombreros and do what
special activity.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Okay, so we're thinking Mexico culture.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
You're thinking Arizona culture. I think the Mexican culture is
the sombreros.
Speaker 12 (08:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
So if we're going Arizona, they're gonna like battlesnake. I'm
gonna ride horses.
Speaker 5 (09:05):
Jake goes for riding horses. That's incorrect. Big skydiving culture
in Arizona, really big open spaces there, because nothing says
honoring military victory like jumping out of a plane and
sall yeah that boys have one Today's edition out.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Twenty Alright, so I think both the girls are getting
shocked together today while singing Living Levita Loca by Ricky Martin.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
Better not mess up?
Speaker 12 (09:34):
Okay, pressure ready, Yeah, upside inside out, She's living Levida Loca.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Shampool you down.
Speaker 5 (09:47):
That was really good.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Yeah, one of you was really good. The third Margarita
was hitting near That means that shot collar question of
the day is done. We're going to do a phone
tap coming up right after this.
Speaker 9 (10:00):
Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning, and I want
you to ask yourself, would you rather start off your
day with a hot cup of coffee? Or a fistful
of spicy tacos.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Oh, I mean I'm not usually I haven't tried a
spicy morning taco.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Yeah you know what I say? Why not both?
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Because it's spicy taco.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
It's sinkle to myo baby. To celebrate, five hour Energy
just announced a new collaboration with the Mexican restaurant Chained
Taco John's to create two new products. One is a
caffeinated mango habanero hot sauce that you can pour over
your tacos.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Wait, it's like this caffeinated caffeine in it.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
The other a two ounce spicy shot of five hour
energy so you can party all night long. I'm shown
the photos of them to my cost here. We'll put
those up on the Brook and Jeffrey Instack.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (11:02):
You're the five hour energy guy, Jeff Like, you're the
guy who drinks it every year.
Speaker 3 (11:05):
I am so excited because I can finally get insomnia
and indigestion. And actually I know a lot of people
like to pour their five hours into their drinks. Call
it stacking. It's perfect. Pour a spicy five hour energy
into your spicy mark today. Okay, really challenge yourself It's
(11:25):
not the first time the five hour has done something
like this, though. Back in twenty twenty four, they came
out with a caffeinated barbecue sauce for Fourth of July.
Speaker 1 (11:33):
It sounds like they need to come out with caffeinated tombs.
Speaker 3 (11:37):
You're gonna need it. But the sauces and the shots
are all being sold on the five Hour Energy website
for a limited time in honor of Sinco and just
for our listeners. Today, we're gonna squirt a little salsa
ver Day over the laser for a spicy Sinco edition
of Laser Stories Chile that's coming up next. It's the
(12:02):
radio segment that believes breakfast should travel with you. That's
why it created the TSA approved smart luggage toaster bag.
So while you waited baggage, claim toast a slice of
bread in your carry on. Yeah, where convenience meets class.
Speaker 4 (12:19):
Imagine that in the overhead the whole plane smells like bread.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
I put butter in my purse.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Now order yours today. With Laser Stories, the segment where
we read weird news stories around the globe just like
everyone else does, except we've got a laser as where
the par face layers just don't. This first laser story
is out of Ohio. A rider in an uber recently
called nine to one one because she said the driver
boasted about having illegal drugs stashed in a fake aerosol
(12:44):
can inside of the car today idiots.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Yeah, that's when he doesn't read Who's cool and who's done?
Speaker 4 (12:51):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 13 (12:52):
True.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Five minutes later cop showed up found the vehicle, but
wasn't sure where the guy was because across from the
street was a food truck that was known as a
pit stop for other uber drivers and had about eight
to ten dudes just milling around the area.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Oh okay, waiting for their decks ride with some tacos?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Was the driver which one did? Officers detained first, the
one that was wearing a shirt that said retired drug dealer.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
No, please tell me that guy can't be that dumb.
Speaker 4 (13:21):
That's amazing.
Speaker 3 (13:22):
If it's right, I guess he came out of retirement,
because that was exactly the right guy.
Speaker 8 (13:26):
No.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
He was ided as Robert Rose, and upon searching the vehicle,
they found the can, which was filled with twenty four
grams of meth, along with pills, a meth pipe, a
digital scale packaging baggies, cash and three cell phones.
Speaker 4 (13:44):
Guy's like very organized.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
Now thinking, do you like retired drug dealers throw parties
like you do? It works for retirements.
Speaker 14 (13:53):
Shirt?
Speaker 1 (13:54):
Yeah I didn't get yeahstead of a gold watch.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
Every time you get into an uber now you have
to be like SODI party.
Speaker 4 (14:03):
I want to go to that retirement.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Party that Robert was charged with drug trafficking, possession of
felony drugs and possession of drug parafignia. There was some
good news for him, though. Police allowed him to wear
his retired drug dealers shirt into jail just for street credit.
Speaker 4 (14:20):
That's a great profile picture.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
This next laser story is out of the Friendly Skies.
Speaker 11 (14:25):
Yay.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Ryanair is Ireland's version of Spirit Airlines.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
Yes, I didn't want to say anything.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
And if you didn't know, they up charged for everything,
have the world's smallest seats and are not really known
for their friendly service, you suck.
Speaker 11 (14:40):
Their social media is hilarious, like it is so funny
on purpose.
Speaker 4 (14:44):
Funny on purpose.
Speaker 11 (14:45):
They literally they'll put like someone's face on their plane
and be like, okay, we.
Speaker 4 (14:50):
Know we overcharged, go away, like they just troll their people.
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Okay, okay, okay, edit that out.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Or insert a laugh track behind it. That's why when
the millionaire CEO Michael O'Leary showed up to an airport
restaurant in Dublin, the servers knew they had a once
in a lifetime chance. Yes, wait, the ceo CEO of
this company. So Michael ordered wine and prawns as a starter,
then sea bass for his meal. But when his bill
(15:16):
showed up, it came with some unexpected charges, including seven
dollars and ninety five cents for extra legugy. Yes, the
restaurant charged him nine dollars and ninety five cents for
priority seating. Oh and nineteen dollars in ninety five cents
for a reservation in a quiet area.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Call it bags just too big by an inch? Yeah, sorry,
you're gonna have to deport.
Speaker 3 (15:43):
The restaurant even posted a pick of the tab on
Instagram with the caption it was a pleasure hosting you.
I hope you don't mind if we added a few
extra costs to your bill. So it quickly went viral.
Some fans commented, I hope they gave him a window seat.
Another said, apparently he was alone. Next time, if he
brings a companion, you should put him on separate tables
(16:04):
and ask if he'd like to pay extra to sit together.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
I love it on this restaurant. I hope he tipped them.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Michael did get a laugh out of the bill, paid
it with tip, and then he left apparently.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
Dropped any of the extra charges on his airline.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
Okay, apparently the joke was well timed. Has Ryan Air
just added more fees to flying where Now if travelers
check in less than forty minutes before their flight, they
will have to pay an additional one hundred bucks just
to board.
Speaker 14 (16:36):
Wow?
Speaker 3 (16:36):
What because they're funny fun out?
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (16:42):
This next Lazer story is out of Boston. You've heard
about a pay it forward chain when you go through
a drive through, Yeah, yeah, where somebody pays for the
person behind them, and then you just keep that going. Yeah,
I try to.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Pay it backwards.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
No one else does that to me. It's nice, but
it also puts them in a spot where they have
to decide if they're going to keep doing it for
the person.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
I mean, you run the risk of having a family
of eighteen behind you, do you know?
Speaker 8 (17:04):
Well?
Speaker 3 (17:04):
A woman's going viral on TikTok for sharing her experience
of someone paying it backwards.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
Wait expecting them to pay for wait her to pay
for that.
Speaker 4 (17:15):
He took my joke.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
Her name is Samantha and she was at a Duncan
drive through last week and when she pulled up to
the window, the clerk told her that the guy ahead
of her who just left, told them that she would
be paid for his order.
Speaker 5 (17:30):
It's smart.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
I've always wondered, like, what are the vagan and not
paid workers?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Shouldn't let that guy.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
In the caption to her video, she said to the
random guy in front of me who lied to the employee,
I hope you have the day you deserve it. Samantha
later posted a follow up where she clarified that she
did not pay for his order and the Duncan employees
were very cool about it, even though they were frustrated
that the guy had essentially stole his coffee.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Yeah, he still got it for free.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
She also shared video of her trying to restore goodness
in the worlds by going back to that Duncan and
paying for the person behind her, But that person refused
and kept honking their horn because the entire process was
just taking too long.
Speaker 4 (18:15):
Yeah it happens.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
Speaking of a long process, this guy decided he needed
to get up off his couch and go to the
bathroom last Tuesday.
Speaker 1 (18:22):
Oh I bet that took a while.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
He's only halfway there, Oh my goodness, and he just
realized he left the TV on it. Now he's got
a decision to make. That sound means Laser Stories has
come to an end of the day. We'll do it again,
same time.
Speaker 9 (18:37):
On Wednesday, Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
At this point, almost nothing can surprise us when we
check our morning show voicemail machine, except for today when
one guy called to say he made date night plans.
And when I say plans plural, I mean lots and
lots and lots of plans. Also, ladies, what's the worst
(19:03):
thing a guy could say to you mid makeout?
Speaker 5 (19:06):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (19:06):
What the heck? U? One dude decided he should probably
apologize for the embarrassing one word thing he lets slip
out instantly ruined the chemistry. And you'll understand why when
we play their messages during a brand new Loser line
right after this, would you is this.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
The right number?
Speaker 9 (19:28):
It's a line goodby.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
Just call me back if you haven't heard the Loser
line before. It works like this, Let's say a guy
approaches you while you're out at the club and uses
this charming pickup line on you, a gorgeous let me
guess your nickname must be yogurt because for some strange reason,
I want to spoon.
Speaker 8 (19:48):
You right now?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Is that so sweet?
Speaker 3 (19:53):
Whatever you do, do not mock him for already being
in a committed relationship with his creatine. Instead, tell him
that maybe you two should meet by the squad rack
later and Sean, you've got more moves than his battery
powered protein shaker. And that's when you give him the
digits to the loser line. So hopefully he leaves you
an awkward voicemail that we can play on the air,
(20:14):
voicemails like this one.
Speaker 13 (20:17):
Hey, it's so, I went ahead and booked us a
reservation for next Thursday night and Friday, you know, just
in case Thursday goes really really well.
Speaker 9 (20:34):
Oh.
Speaker 13 (20:34):
Also, I reserved a tandem kayak for Saturday.
Speaker 15 (20:38):
Morning in case you stay over and we want to
do a little fun activity together.
Speaker 10 (20:46):
You know. So I hope you like nature and close
physical proximity to handsome fellows.
Speaker 8 (20:57):
So anyway, let me know bye.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
You know, women complain about men who don't plan thing.
Speaker 3 (21:10):
He's not just a planner. He is confident that your
one date is going to roll into four straight days
of NonStop fun.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
Well and how sweet, like you're gonna stay the night
on a Friday night.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
I was thinking it was just a drunk hookup, but
he's got kayaking plans.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
You can make it till Tuesday. I have a surprise.
It's close physical proximity.
Speaker 14 (21:33):
Bryan, this is.
Speaker 11 (21:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 14 (21:39):
I'm just whatever.
Speaker 16 (21:40):
I'm just gonna I'm just gonna put this out there.
I was just thinking, you know what if hypothetically a
person wanted to ask another person out for coffee and uh,
you know, maybe that other person be like, sure, coffee
and open to seeing where that goes. And then like
(22:05):
maybe that first person hypothetically would just really enjoy spend
some time with you and uh maybe going back to
her play hypothetically. And I'm just to bring out there,
so anyway, if you're if you're interested, maybe hypothetically give
(22:28):
that another person like a DM or whatever.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
She really needs to look up what it means to
put something out there. Yeah, she did not put it
out there.
Speaker 3 (22:40):
Do you feel like that was the first message that
she left? Why do I feel like that was take
number twelve before she got to you know what, maybe,
hypothetically speaking, I thought.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
She was going to apologize at the end.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
I don't know why, just giving a Lexus vibe yea,
and she was definitely gonna say I'm sorry. I'm a
big fan of the asking for a friend saying yeah.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
But remember we are on YouTube, our shows on TikTok
and so all the other podcast platforms at Brook and Jeffrey,
where you can hear all of our second dates. Our
phone taps are awkward calls and your favorite loser line
messages just like this one.
Speaker 10 (23:17):
Hey, Grace, Sorry I was I was just daydreaming a
little bit. I had to call you, and I just
had to tell you that I can't stop thinking about
your elbows. I don't know if anyone's ever told you this,
but you've got super elegant joint structure, Like no joke.
(23:37):
These are top to your elbows you have, you know,
they just they've been so naturally And some people they
have elbows that are there all sharp and jagged, a
little angry knees, but yours, oh my god, they're like
real elegant princess elbows.
Speaker 8 (23:58):
Anyway, call me if you have some room in.
Speaker 10 (24:01):
Your schedule to hang out a little bit elbow room,
I should probably stop.
Speaker 15 (24:11):
Okay, yeah, you thought that.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Was kind of I'll go.
Speaker 5 (24:16):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
I kind of liked it. I have weird elbows. So
she's like, yeah, is this.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
A thing though, where instead of being like, hey, are
you a boot guy? You're a butt guy, they're like, oh,
you're an elbow guy. Is that trend?
Speaker 2 (24:30):
It's kind of nicer to have those complimented than anything else,
to be honest, next.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
Thing in Cosmo magazine that have elbow models showing off
on page one.
Speaker 8 (24:39):
Yeah for shows.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
Really check out my eyebows.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
Coming around on this trend. Actually, I hope this becomes
a thing.
Speaker 15 (24:50):
Hey, it's we we met last night at the bar
with the like the weird bathroom writing thing. I think
it was called the penguin. No right, it was puffing.
(25:11):
I don't know, some arctic animal. But I just wanted
to say sorry again the whole the accidental thing, like
hold out the mom thing right, calling you mom?
Speaker 10 (25:31):
Yeah, I am sorry about that.
Speaker 15 (25:36):
I did not mean to call you mom, obviously, I
just I'm going through some.
Speaker 10 (25:42):
Right now.
Speaker 15 (25:43):
But I only said it because it's like you have
like the exact same color hair, all right, but that's
it seriously so anyway, but yeah, it was cool and
I have fun, So you know.
Speaker 9 (25:59):
Call me.
Speaker 3 (26:01):
Wow one passionate night in a bar bathroom in the
guy calls you mom, and then you're gonna give him
a fake number. Talk about a bad choice.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
You know, jeff, I know that there's some guys that
like daddy issues.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Yeah, no, women like mommy issues.
Speaker 3 (26:16):
Called somebody their mother in makeout. I knew you would.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
Hits too close to home.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
Give him in like three or four chances before you
reject him. Make sure you subscribe to the Brook and
Jeffrey YouTube where you can hear all of your favorite
loser line clips of the week. We highlight them right
there for you, and we're gonna do a phone tap.
Speaker 9 (26:36):
Coming up Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning, Brook.
Speaker 3 (26:39):
And Jeffrey in the Morning, And in today's prank Call,
we reach out to a guy who just created his
very first online dating profile and what he wrote wasn't
exactly working out for him, so he turned to chat
GPT for help on what to say, which is fine,
nothing wrong with that unless you tell your buddies about it. Yeah,
(27:01):
then your buddies are going to reach out to us,
and then we're going to act like we're from the
dating app, and we're going to say we caught you
like we did in your phone tap right now another.
Speaker 8 (27:18):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Hi?
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Is this jim.
Speaker 15 (27:22):
Uh? It is calling Grey.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
I'm calling from the app Heart Dating. My name's Hilda,
Hilda Climb.
Speaker 8 (27:30):
Okay, how can I help you?
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Well, we noticed that you recently created a new profile
with us in the last forty eight hours.
Speaker 15 (27:38):
Great, cool, So what why would you be calling me
about that?
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Well, unfortunately, your page was flagged by our system as
being plagiarized.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
That's funny. How you don't know.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Yah, I'm with the integrity team and we ran your
profile through our originality scanner.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
Oh, it's an eighty seven.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Percent identical match to a chat GBT generated romance prompt.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
Caught you what?
Speaker 2 (28:10):
Yeah, the profile's right in front of me and your
opening line is I'm just a husky laugh looking for
my soulmate who loves hot sauce and NPR.
Speaker 14 (28:21):
Okay, I don't understand what's wrong with.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
That hot sauce and NPR.
Speaker 3 (28:26):
Yeah, I mean those things aren't mutually exclusive.
Speaker 14 (28:29):
I don't understand what you're trying to imply.
Speaker 9 (28:31):
Sir.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
Again, I'm with the integrity team, and based on your photos,
I highly doubt you even own hot sauce.
Speaker 5 (28:40):
What do you mean I look like I don't.
Speaker 9 (28:41):
Are you trying?
Speaker 14 (28:42):
Is it because I'm white?
Speaker 1 (28:43):
But we're not here to judge.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
At our company, we require at least two honest, human
generated cringe lines per profile.
Speaker 14 (28:51):
So I'm not cringe enough as the issue.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
You're not human enough?
Speaker 8 (28:55):
What do you mean I'm not human enough? How could
I not be human?
Speaker 14 (28:59):
You're talking to me now, Okay.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
We're going to lower the emotion and we'll just rewrite
it together. So let's ditch the husky laughline you stole.
Speaker 14 (29:08):
They didn't steal it.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
No one's buying it, and I'm going to replace it
with you cry uncontrollably during Pixar movies like that?
Speaker 15 (29:17):
What?
Speaker 1 (29:18):
No, that sounds real.
Speaker 14 (29:20):
It's not real.
Speaker 8 (29:21):
That's not true. I don't even watch Pixar movies.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
Okay, then you tell me how would you make a
woman an emotional sandwich?
Speaker 9 (29:28):
What?
Speaker 8 (29:28):
What kind of question is that?
Speaker 5 (29:30):
Why?
Speaker 8 (29:30):
I don't even understand why I'm having to do this, sir.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
I'm driving the train here, so please just chew two,
get on board. Do we need to have some sort
of raw emotional sentence?
Speaker 8 (29:40):
You're going to get raw emotion.
Speaker 5 (29:42):
Rat understand.
Speaker 8 (29:42):
Why is such a hasshle?
Speaker 2 (29:44):
That is exactly what we're going towards. Yeah, it doesn't
even need punctuation.
Speaker 8 (29:48):
Lady, you're not lady. You are just not getting it.
Speaker 14 (29:50):
This is my dating profile.
Speaker 8 (29:52):
I can say what I want to say.
Speaker 14 (29:53):
I don't need you to monitor it.
Speaker 9 (29:55):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
This is taking a lot of time, so I'm just
gonna put it in myself.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Let's see here.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
No, oh, do not do that.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
I once fell in love with a barista because she
spelled my name right.
Speaker 9 (30:07):
What.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Oh that's human, that's messy. It's hot. Women are gonna
love it.
Speaker 8 (30:12):
What are you doing that makes me sound like some
kind of beta. I'm not some cry baby boos.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
Oh shut up?
Speaker 8 (30:19):
Oh my god, you tell me to shut up.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
You've got to match with your new profile lines. Hold on,
I'm reading it.
Speaker 8 (30:25):
This is unbelievable.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
It is I never thought you'd matche with anyone.
Speaker 4 (30:30):
Are you seeing me right now?
Speaker 16 (30:32):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Look at this.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
It's a vegan who lives out of her van. Two
miles from your location.
Speaker 8 (30:37):
I don't want that. I'm not looking to match with
some crazy, homeless hipie girl.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Should I respond to her and say you're down to
meet up with the organic pea patch to drinkombucha and
discuss political strife.
Speaker 5 (30:47):
Absolutely not.
Speaker 14 (30:48):
I don't want your health. I didn't ask for your health, and.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
If we don't change it, we're gonna have to put
a disclaimer on there with a badge that says this
profile has been lightly AI enhanced.
Speaker 1 (31:00):
Just hard to get rid of.
Speaker 8 (31:01):
Forget this, this is stupid. I don't want it, you
know what, Just delete my profile. I don't want to
be involved in any Actually.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
That's the one thing I can't do.
Speaker 3 (31:09):
Oh my god, because I'm really with.
Speaker 2 (31:11):
The radio show Brook and Jeffrey in the morning and
I don't work for the dating app at all.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
Hold right, it's a break phone call.
Speaker 5 (31:21):
Every buddy set.
Speaker 8 (31:22):
You up, kidding me crazy run.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
He wanted us to prank you because you've been using
chat GPT to spice up your dating profile, and he
called you out for it.
Speaker 8 (31:34):
I can't believe you, guys, did I feel so stupid?
Speaker 1 (31:36):
I can't believe you use AI to make up who
you are.
Speaker 8 (31:40):
Well, I put in real stuff.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Yeah, hot sauce and NPR You al right.
Speaker 8 (31:44):
Why wouldn't I be able to do both of those?
And how on earth do I look like?
Speaker 14 (31:47):
I don't use hot sauce?
Speaker 1 (31:49):
You look like pepper's too spicy for you.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
You know how white that is?
Speaker 2 (31:52):
That is so wake up every morning with low taps
weekday mornings on the twenties, freaking Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
I think there's fewer and fewer rom com movies being
made now just because people don't meet in real life anymore.
Speaker 4 (32:10):
I mean, that's true.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
It's just not believable. And you can't have a realistic
romantic scene with a drunk dude at two am sliding
into a hot girl's.
Speaker 9 (32:21):
D MS or can you.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
I don't know, just thinking about it, job.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
Maybe maybe someone should try it. But that's why today's
call was so rare, because one of our listeners says
he turned a super awkward moment in real life into
an actual meet cute. It seemed almost too perfect to
be true.
Speaker 4 (32:45):
Way, what do you do after you meet then?
Speaker 3 (32:47):
I don't know, I don't know. We're yeah, let's hear
it in your brand new second date update, right, after
this second date updated. There's a lot of fun things
in life that begin with the word street, street, street, magic, street, Tacos.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
Okay, Jeff meets.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
Yeah street walkers, right, I feel like I do that.
I walk down a lot of streets Tacos. Well, today
we're going to talk to a street dater.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
Jeff's like, why are people giving me money for?
Speaker 3 (33:24):
I must have really good hair today. But again, this
guy says he's a street dater. He met someone wal well,
not stereotypically, but he met somebody while out on the street. Oh, okay,
that's what I meant. His name is Drew street Walker. Yeah,
technically Drew street Walker too.
Speaker 8 (33:41):
I think I walked the streets about as much as
everybody else around here.
Speaker 3 (33:44):
Ye, he's a humble street walk Jeff's neighborhood. Okay, we
should probably using But apparently you met somebody while just
walking out and about how did that happen?
Speaker 8 (33:56):
Yeah, I was at a bookstore locally, and I like
to read. So I'm leaving the bookstore and i'm you know,
I have my face buried in the book because I'm
walking and I knock into this woman.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Oh that's kind of a cute. You know, it's sound
like out of a movie. The bookstore is involved.
Speaker 8 (34:12):
Clumsy, her bag fell. I helped her, and then I
gave her a little flirt.
Speaker 4 (34:16):
Wait, wait, did ever really happen in slow motion?
Speaker 1 (34:18):
I think he's joking about that part.
Speaker 3 (34:19):
I know, I imagine the bag falling. He grabbed it,
he picked it up, he ran No, gotcha, you just
knocked her bag out of her hand. By accident.
Speaker 8 (34:30):
Yeah, by accident.
Speaker 1 (34:31):
Oh, you really did knock the bag over.
Speaker 5 (34:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 8 (34:34):
We bumped into each other. It was a pretty big bump,
and you know, everything just kind of flew all over
the place. I helped There's some stuff hell out of
her bag, and I said, you know, it's usually old
ladies I knock over and then I just move on.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
And funny he beats him with her. I get the joke.
Speaker 4 (34:53):
I kind of liked it.
Speaker 8 (34:54):
So we then we started walking and we started going
in the same direction. So I just started to do
and a little more like joking, like you following me?
And she's like, no, you following me? And we laughed again,
trying to build like a little rapporto.
Speaker 11 (35:08):
Bro, like you're turning like kind of a bad situation
or a weird situation into like something positive.
Speaker 1 (35:13):
What point were you able to get her name?
Speaker 8 (35:15):
I did ask her name, but we walked a little more,
and we would love to know the name.
Speaker 4 (35:21):
She's like, don't tell anybody what my real name is.
Speaker 8 (35:23):
Oh that name is Sonia.
Speaker 3 (35:25):
Okay, so you and Sonya are just accidentally walking in
the same direction and kind of flirting with each other.
Speaker 8 (35:30):
It sounds like, yeah, we eventually get to a park
and we start walking through the park.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
What when you got into the park. Is that when
you took her bag?
Speaker 8 (35:38):
Then that's when I knocked her over and ran Okay, yeah.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
Gotcha more escape routes than here.
Speaker 4 (35:47):
Up a tree.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Did you really have to go to the same way
or were you just pretending so you could shock plants?
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Like you both just had free time to keep walking.
Speaker 4 (35:55):
Oh yeah, that's true too.
Speaker 8 (35:56):
I walked through that park all the time. Yeah. No,
this isn't like the fairy. I was going in that
direction anyway. So it is just like a very good
meet cute Okay. Eventually we came across a sketch artist
and he flagged us down. He was like, hey, you
guys want to get a picture. You thought we were
a couple.
Speaker 1 (36:13):
Wait, did you get a character drive?
Speaker 8 (36:15):
Oh look I was down, but she wasn't. Okay, I
think first, I think was freaked down.
Speaker 3 (36:21):
Yeah, it sounds there's so many like perfect things that
are happening to you along the way on this short walk.
You didn't set this whole thing up. It sounds like,
how could he do?
Speaker 8 (36:30):
No, I didn't set anything up.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Well, you just have a friend who's like in the
park with a thing, and he's like, I'm just going
to take her this way.
Speaker 8 (36:36):
I didn't say it was a friend. It was just
a sketch artist. He wasn't a friendly.
Speaker 2 (36:41):
The most that would be the most elaborate setup ever.
You accidentally run into somebody and then suddenly you call
your buddy when she's not looking, who happens to be
an artist, to tell him to set up quickly at
the park.
Speaker 4 (36:51):
I really want to sit down with her for forty
five minutes. This stranger.
Speaker 3 (36:54):
I'm just saying. We've heard people that have like orchestrated
all sorts of weird things in order to meet you.
Speaker 4 (37:00):
That's true, but this doesn't sound like that job.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
How long is this walk going on.
Speaker 8 (37:04):
We're about twenty minutes into the walk by the time
she said no to the picture. But halfway through the
park and we got to the end of the park.
It was probably about a half an hour we were
together and I got a good vibe. So I asked
her number to go out, and she gave me a
number and the date just hasn't materialized.
Speaker 2 (37:21):
And said, Okay, have you guys talked via text or
phone call?
Speaker 8 (37:26):
No? Nothing. I've tried to call a few times. I've
lost a few messages.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
I automatically think that she gave you a fake number.
Speaker 3 (37:33):
Oh, there's no response.
Speaker 8 (37:35):
Yeah, it was her voice on the voicemail.
Speaker 5 (37:37):
It's okay, okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
She gave you the numbers. So I'm assuming she's single.
Did you specifically ask her?
Speaker 8 (37:44):
I didn't ask her if she was dating anyone. No,
but I left a few voicemails and she hasn't answered.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
How many yeah?
Speaker 8 (37:52):
Three? Maybe four?
Speaker 11 (37:54):
Oh, Jack, I don't think I called a girlfriend that
many times in one year.
Speaker 3 (37:59):
I think my mom and calls me. He felt the connection, So.
Speaker 4 (38:03):
Whatever, one's different. Some people love being on the phone.
Speaker 3 (38:05):
So I'm glad you take a break from your extensive
book reading in order to help reach out to the show.
And we're going to try and help you call this girl,
what's her name? Sonya? Yeah, sonor Okay, we'll reach We'll
reach out to Sonia and we'll do your second date
update right after this hold on second date update. If
I hadn't read it on the back of a Blockbuster
(38:27):
movie sleeve, I still wouldn't believe it. But an accidental
sidewalk bumping turned into your classic Hallmark street walker love
story again with.
Speaker 1 (38:38):
The term yeah, that's the wrong use.
Speaker 4 (38:41):
We're trying to make it sound better than it is.
Speaker 1 (38:43):
It's not a Hallmark movie. I'll tell you that one.
Speaker 3 (38:45):
It fits in this scenario because our listener Drew accidentally
ran into a woman outside of a bookstore, knocked over
her bag, and then turned that awkward moment into a
twenty five minute stroll through a local.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
Park thirty I believe, I mean, those five minutes are
going to be presious. When it's only a short amount
of time, you have to get fair.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
And it all seems too perfect to be true. And
maybe it was because she's not responding to any of
his messages.
Speaker 4 (39:11):
It's always the park scene. Yeah, ruins something in that.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
I mean he left.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Okay, here's the thing you left. Four voicemails. We have
not asked what was in the voicemails.
Speaker 8 (39:22):
I just told her, Hey, it's me Drew by the park.
You need a lot of guys by the park.
Speaker 11 (39:26):
I mean it's true, not even from the park, like
the guys that's adjacent.
Speaker 3 (39:30):
Maybe she thinks you live in the park after that
that there's a chance though that if she's not responding
to anything, maybe she wasn't even real he was real.
Speaker 8 (39:42):
Are you sure that would make me crazy exactly?
Speaker 1 (39:45):
What could just mean? You have a bad drug habit?
Speaker 4 (39:47):
Yeah, we're from the park.
Speaker 3 (39:49):
Were you microdosing that day? Omark hasn't done that yet.
A microdosing Christmas lead to this? Well, if you over
micro dose?
Speaker 1 (39:57):
Yeah, some of those kids still in the DARE program.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
I signed that contract.
Speaker 3 (40:04):
Let's let's have all the street walkers unite, because we're
gonna call and we're gonna get an answer from this
woman to figure out what actually happened, if she's real,
and hopefully if there's an explanation, a lot of.
Speaker 6 (40:14):
Kids listening who use that term wrong for the next
Christmas the street.
Speaker 3 (40:21):
This is the education you get here. I'm gonna die
of the number.
Speaker 8 (40:23):
Right now here.
Speaker 9 (40:23):
We go.
Speaker 8 (40:34):
Hello.
Speaker 3 (40:36):
It sounds real, jeff, It sounds like a person. Is
this Sonya?
Speaker 14 (40:39):
Yes, this is Sonya.
Speaker 3 (40:41):
Who is this son Hey? Sonya. We're a radio show
called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 14 (40:45):
Good morning, Hi, Hi, Hey, what's this about.
Speaker 3 (40:51):
This is a segment that we do on our show.
It's called a second Date Update, and we're trying to
help out one of our listeners. His name is Drew,
who you met the other day outside of a bookstore.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
Did you just laugh?
Speaker 12 (41:06):
Are you sorry? I just I can't believe that you're
calling about him.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
You remember, remember Drew you talked you over on accident
outside the bookstore?
Speaker 12 (41:16):
Yeah, yeah, I remember Drew.
Speaker 3 (41:18):
Okay, Well that's great because he said there was like
a meet cute type of situation that happened on the
street and then you guys went through a park for
a bit. He left a few messages.
Speaker 12 (41:29):
Yeah, I mean that did happen, and I was actually
open to seeing him again.
Speaker 14 (41:33):
That's for the messages.
Speaker 12 (41:35):
The messages are the problems.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
Well, we asked him about the messages and he basically,
according to him, he said, it was basically, Hey, this
is Drew from the park. Remember I'm Drew.
Speaker 8 (41:45):
Is that what he said.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
Yeah, well, summary interesting.
Speaker 1 (41:50):
Oh no, I'm not curious, like.
Speaker 12 (41:52):
He left me one message that was so ridiculous. I
actually my roommate and I have been like dying laughing
about it. Oh, I actually I wrote it down.
Speaker 2 (42:03):
Well, you wrote down the message because it was that
funny to you.
Speaker 3 (42:07):
Wow, it would it be okay if we know what
the message said.
Speaker 12 (42:10):
Oh, absolutely, I'd love to read it.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
To you, because we haven't. We haven't heard anything about it.
We just know there was a bunch of messages.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
She is delighted to.
Speaker 12 (42:18):
Yeah, she is, okay, So he told me, he said,
I left you a message you didn't respond to, and
I don't like leaving second messages. But I like you.
You're very elegant, You're very attractive. But I don't play
(42:38):
that game. If I don't hear back by three pm.
Speaker 14 (42:44):
Tomorrow, I'm no longer interested.
Speaker 2 (42:51):
Because he called us, Yeah, it didn't mean it.
Speaker 12 (42:55):
Then she goes on to explain why I should call him.
Speaker 1 (42:58):
Well, you should call him some positives. That's good.
Speaker 12 (43:02):
He says, I'm very smart, I'm great in bed, and
I makes a lot of money.
Speaker 4 (43:09):
A something everybody says.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
I mean, it's one of those things. When you say
it's hard to believe.
Speaker 12 (43:18):
It's so, then he says, believe it or not, I'm
a complete catch. I'm one of the only men in
the city that has no issues.
Speaker 4 (43:31):
Yeah, exactly, I'm the best one.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
I have yet to find a person that doesn't have issues.
Speaker 4 (43:37):
Is like a child trying to do reverse psychology.
Speaker 1 (43:39):
Is that finally the end of the message.
Speaker 12 (43:44):
So I don't know what your situation is.
Speaker 14 (43:46):
If you're just insecure, or if you're.
Speaker 12 (43:49):
On medication as way psychologically normal and you haven't called
me because something bad happened in your life and you.
Speaker 14 (43:59):
Just need it a few days.
Speaker 2 (44:01):
Heck is he reject that got a little hinge, so
started un hinge, then it got a little better.
Speaker 1 (44:09):
Now we're back.
Speaker 4 (44:10):
Now we're unhinged again.
Speaker 3 (44:11):
Okay. Yeah, So clearly there was a lot happening in
that message, and it could help to get insight into
what he meant by it.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
Because it's pretty embarrassed right now.
Speaker 3 (44:20):
Maybe because sonya, he is on the other line listening.
We've got Drew waiting to talk to you.
Speaker 8 (44:26):
Oh hey, hey, Sony, hey hey, is there something that
I said that wasn't true? Was there something that I
said on that voice. Now, that wasn't that was a lie?
Speaker 1 (44:37):
What?
Speaker 8 (44:37):
Yeah, you can't say that, dude.
Speaker 4 (44:39):
You're coming to kind of hot? Yeah, a little bit,
I think defensive.
Speaker 1 (44:43):
No apology.
Speaker 12 (44:45):
Well I'm sorry, Drew. I just like we met for
thirty minutes, we didn't even go on a real date.
And then all of this you're going on about how
great you are, and then you start to come for
me and like blame me for not calling you back.
I just found it all to be a little much
for someone that like, I'm so you agree that I'm right.
Speaker 8 (45:03):
So what with the problem? You don't you don't appreciate
being direct. You don't like guys who are direct. I'm direct,
making a lot of money. I'm smart and I'm good
in bed to being direct.
Speaker 1 (45:16):
More and more doubtful talking about.
Speaker 8 (45:19):
You know you're all laughing now, but you won't be
You'll be crying later when I'm out of your life.
That's what's gonna happen if you don't make the right move.
Speaker 4 (45:27):
I got to find out how good you are in bed, bro, So.
Speaker 8 (45:32):
You didn't call me back was really stupid. I mean,
come on, people like me who are good in bed
and smart and stuff. You know, why do you leave
that stupid person is going to give that up?
Speaker 3 (45:44):
I think points.
Speaker 8 (45:48):
You know, you know, in this city there are no men,
and I'm a total catch. You know that I with
him that I don't know.
Speaker 14 (45:56):
I don't know, Drew.
Speaker 12 (45:58):
I feel like the people who are actually good in
bed don't go around talking about how good they are
in bed. Yeah, I'm not getting the best vibes from you,
to be honest, Like it just feels like that.
Speaker 8 (46:09):
You haven't bragged about being good in bed.
Speaker 3 (46:12):
Yeah, well you're not supposed to.
Speaker 1 (46:13):
What are you talking about?
Speaker 3 (46:15):
Listen to any hip hop music they're all about that.
Speaker 2 (46:17):
Are we going to ignore the rest of the text
about what was that?
Speaker 8 (46:23):
I saw her beg her begs. Everything fell everywhere I
saw her meds.
Speaker 1 (46:30):
You read everyone's on medication.
Speaker 8 (46:32):
Yeah, on medication. You sound crazy smart and well read.
Speaker 1 (46:39):
Sony thought you were going to come to Drew.
Speaker 2 (46:42):
This is honestly, this is shocking to be I thought
we were going to come to Drew and.
Speaker 1 (46:45):
You were going to be humiliated that this voicemail was.
Speaker 3 (46:48):
Out there, But like, no, only somebody who's addicted to
meds would be humiliated. He's perfect broke.
Speaker 2 (46:54):
Yeah, with no narcissistic tendencies at all.
Speaker 8 (46:58):
No, I don't clear good, Sonya?
Speaker 3 (47:02):
Was he right? Are you on the verge of tears
right now?
Speaker 12 (47:05):
I'm just really heartbroken that it can't be with this perfect.
Speaker 8 (47:11):
I'm glad that you can finally admit it, Sonya.
Speaker 3 (47:14):
Don't give up yet, because I'm going to give you
a second chance right now by offering to send you
out with the only perfect man in the entire city.
Speaker 1 (47:22):
With no issues, with no issues.
Speaker 2 (47:25):
She would do that.
Speaker 8 (47:26):
If she went on a date, if she called me
back like a normal person, I wouldn't have to do
what happened. But he just called me back like a
normal person.
Speaker 3 (47:33):
Sonya. It's up to you if you'd like to see
him again or not yelled at a little bit, it's
your choice.
Speaker 12 (47:38):
I appreciate the offer, but I really I'm really.
Speaker 14 (47:41):
Not into the narcism.
Speaker 1 (47:43):
Oh wow, that's shocking.
Speaker 3 (47:47):
She's talking about me though there like and I get that,
But what about Drew?
Speaker 1 (47:51):
That was really shocking.
Speaker 12 (47:53):
I say no to Drew also.
Speaker 9 (47:55):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (47:56):
Wow, really, Sonya, I'll tell her with you at all true.
Speaker 3 (48:05):
If this woman can't see how perfect you are, then
she doesn't deserve you.
Speaker 9 (48:08):
Wow.
Speaker 8 (48:09):
Thank you?
Speaker 2 (48:10):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (48:10):
You can't read sarcasm.
Speaker 8 (48:12):
He's really thanking you, jeff I don't read sarcasm.
Speaker 3 (48:16):
Yeah, you hear it, Brooke exactly. Thank you, Drew, thank you.
Speaker 5 (48:22):
He really is perfect, Jeffrey.
Speaker 3 (48:25):
In the morning. I feel like we should have asked
that guy in part one, how confident are you in
getting a date one to ten? Oh my god, I
felt like maybe he was a four going into it.
He would have said he'd like thirty.
Speaker 1 (48:39):
Yeah, here's the thing.
Speaker 2 (48:40):
He acts so confident, But we never brought up the
fact that on message too, he said he'd never be
interested again if she didn't call him back, and yet
he was still on the phone.
Speaker 1 (48:48):
Yeah, still left her more voicemails. Yeah still, I mean,
all of what he was saying it is not believable.
Speaker 4 (48:54):
It's like a guy who doesn't know how to play
the game.
Speaker 11 (48:56):
But someone told him right like, hey, if you ignore
a girl or you're just this.
Speaker 1 (49:00):
And they love ultimatum.
Speaker 3 (49:04):
Yeah, didn't work, and he was totally shocked that she
wouldn't take him up on the opportunity to be he
is a perfect.
Speaker 1 (49:11):
Man, so many options, he'll be fine.
Speaker 11 (49:14):
Ever said they were perfect and turned out to be
like perfect Like, when has George Clooney.
Speaker 1 (49:18):
Been like, oh my god, do you know what he
said this week that was so annoying to me.
Speaker 3 (49:21):
Let's not go into it.
Speaker 5 (49:23):
I don't want to go into it.
Speaker 3 (49:25):
I don't want to go into it. But look, if
our listeners I kind of do. If our listeners want
to take advantage of the perfect man, you can go
check out our Second Date podcast and listen to me
host that.
Speaker 1 (49:36):
Okay, listen text in if you want to know about
the George Clooney dirt all Share.
Speaker 3 (49:42):
We'll talk about it off air, But go check out
our podcast wherever you get yours online at Brooke and Jeffrey.
Speaker 9 (49:47):
Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 3 (49:50):
I was on the dark web again last night.
Speaker 1 (49:53):
Stay off the dark Web.
Speaker 3 (49:54):
I just poured myself a glass of red and started
browsing for bargains.
Speaker 1 (50:00):
You started bart you on illegal things there.
Speaker 3 (50:04):
That's how I unwind. They've got lots of good stuff
on there. Old Soviet spy bananas, DIY vasectomy kits.
Speaker 1 (50:13):
That's not smart. I think you should try it.
Speaker 3 (50:15):
Brooks Bank Routing number wish definitely put that in the cart.
Oh yeah, that's there. But I noticed no matter how hard.
I searched there was one thing you can't buy on
the dark web, and that's true love.
Speaker 4 (50:28):
I wish bro take my money.
Speaker 3 (50:30):
I mean quick, sloppy love. Absolutely, they have lots of that,
but real life, changing, head over heels type of love.
The only website that comes even close to giving you
that is Craigslist.
Speaker 4 (50:45):
And you didn't see that coming.
Speaker 3 (50:47):
I know you're doubting it, but we're going to prove
it when we read some of the messages written there
by real life Romeos and Juliet's in a brand new
misconnections right after.
Speaker 9 (50:55):
This kitty Misconnections that was staring.
Speaker 3 (51:00):
There's only two places to find true love in this world.
One is inside of a CVS pharmacy when you lock
eyes while buying extra strength cold sore cream. True love
can wait, oh usually seven to ten business days.
Speaker 1 (51:17):
See both of the issues turn into a warm sword.
Speaker 3 (51:20):
The other is on the pages of craigslist dot org.
We scour that website every week to find the best
misconnections they have to offer, like this first one titled
from Buffet to Bay.
Speaker 5 (51:34):
I like it.
Speaker 3 (51:35):
That's Man for Woman forties east Side Best Western. He says,
I was at the complimentary Continental breakfast the other morning
around eight am.
Speaker 1 (51:45):
Yeah, it doesn't it feel like a score when a hotel.
Speaker 3 (51:48):
Just perusing the pastries, yogurt and cereals. When I saw
you gingerly sliding in through the side door holding two
medium sized tupperware containers. There you were acting like a
sexy Buffean ninja, and that was intriguing.
Speaker 2 (52:07):
So you're taking it homech Oh, Well, I always, I
always put it in my purse for later, but that's
when I'm a.
Speaker 1 (52:14):
Guest, so I feel like it's Yeah.
Speaker 3 (52:17):
I followed as you made your way to the juice bar,
where I watched you pour at least a half gallon
of OJ into a large ziplock bag.
Speaker 1 (52:27):
I don't know. That's a very trusting person with that ziplog.
Speaker 9 (52:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (52:31):
Your brazenness was enamoring so much, so I knew I
had to say something, So I tapped you on the
shoulder and offered you a waffle and a blackened strip
of bacon in exchange for your time to have breakfast
with me.
Speaker 1 (52:47):
She doesn't have time to stay there, She's got to
get in and get out quick.
Speaker 3 (52:50):
You agreed to it as long as I promised that
you could show my room card to security on the
way out that super smart deal. The next few minutes
we laughed over the free buffet stories you had across
this great country of oust Man.
Speaker 1 (53:06):
I bet she's got some good reviews.
Speaker 3 (53:07):
The one about the Lakina and Pensacola still makes me blush.
I can't believe you had to run out so fast
your bathrobe flew off. Anyway, I enjoyed our time and
sharing food with you, even if you weren't legally allowed
to eat at that establishment for the next decade. But
if you see this, reach out and let's brunch again.
(53:31):
That signed Steve, He says. PS. My room was rifled
through shortly after the buffet. I'm assuming it wasn't you.
Speaker 1 (53:40):
That's Steve incidence.
Speaker 3 (53:43):
Your next Craigslist misconnection is titled just leave your child
with Me Woman for Man twenty five daycare center. Oh wait,
she says you. Mid twenties, short brown hair, single dad
with cute rattail popeing out the back of your official
US conductor's train hat a lot, he says me. Daycare worker,
(54:10):
purple flower dress with tattooed eyebrows and piercings. You couldn't
see but could sense were there. Like you said, you
were interested in finding an open spot for your little
man Damien, so I gave you the grand tour. We
flirted in the booknook as I pulled out a special
(54:30):
pop up story from a shelf the kids can't reach. Oh,
you seemed surprised, but also stirred up. Really I could
smell the ceremonies spelled with ana and a y at the.
Speaker 6 (54:46):
End of the they At one point I admitted to
you that I secretly hate children, but I'd give Damiens
special treatment, a daily fee of apple sauce, fruit snacks,
and canned peas, and she even had the cold medicine
into his like he does the rest of the cap.
Speaker 3 (55:09):
It's been two weeks now and I'm a little insulted
you haven't enrolled him yet. But if money's the issue,
I'd be more than willing to give you the dirty
daddy discount. Oh, you just have to give me something
in return.
Speaker 1 (55:22):
Wait a minute, we could have been getting a deal
on daycare. My husband would have just had to like
a dirty.
Speaker 3 (55:27):
Daddy winky face that signed Sangria wool. Would you ever
let somebody named Sangria watch your kid?
Speaker 4 (55:36):
You know I don't know.
Speaker 2 (55:37):
Alcohol names in general are just kind of a red
flag for me.
Speaker 3 (55:41):
Let's go to your final misconnection titled stoked on Stokes
for you, stokes Man for woman, thirty seven Walgreens Pharmacy. Huh,
he says you were the freckled thirties question mark babe
who filled my prescription yesterday was asking.
Speaker 1 (55:59):
Her age the actual pharmacist you're hitting on.
Speaker 3 (56:02):
I almost missed you. Then I did a quick double
take for a second dose of that face. Now that's
a prescription. I want to take double dose of face.
Please smiley face blush emoji.
Speaker 2 (56:15):
I mean, this is why some of my pharmacists people
are still wearing face masks.
Speaker 3 (56:19):
I I was the cute blonde guy wearing the bike
helmet in under armoured tank. First of all, thanks for
not judging me when I picked up that special cream.
It's not what you think.
Speaker 1 (56:33):
It usually always is.
Speaker 3 (56:34):
When you say that, I promise I'm training for the
Peloton Bikethon and need something for those secret war wounds
down below. I don't know about you, but during our
interaction I could feel the tension between us. The bike
helmet has a tendency to do that to the ladies.
Speaker 2 (56:55):
A bike helmet if he's a peloton going anywhere anyway.
Speaker 3 (56:59):
You seem like a woman who appreciates a man like
myself who's clearly dedicated to his hobbies. That's why I'd
like to offer you a one time deal. Tomorrow night.
I'm free between rides for a few hours, and if
you're lucky, I'll let you make me dinner at your place,
Lasagnia for the much needed carbo load. Please, if you
(57:26):
see this message, text me back what strength was the
hemorrhoids cream you gave me so that I know that
it's you that signed Peloton, Mike, they have a minimal strength.
If you ever wonder why the birthrate is declining in
this country, Craigslist misconnections always gives you a hint. And
(57:51):
that was your Craigslist misconnections for the day.
Speaker 9 (57:53):
Brook and Jeffrey in the morning, We've.
Speaker 3 (58:04):
Got a return player, Mike on the phone, who took
an l last time he appeared on this segment, but
he's come back with a theory. He thinks the reason
that he lost is because Brooke might actually be an AI. Mike,
why do you think that.
Speaker 17 (58:25):
She too damn good at this game?
Speaker 2 (58:26):
Oh God, I am too messy as a human to
be an Ai Brook.
Speaker 3 (58:31):
What's your non binary clapback? To prove that you're not
actually a.
Speaker 1 (58:35):
Computer glitch for a one error?
Speaker 3 (58:41):
You broke her my congratulations?
Speaker 9 (58:43):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (58:44):
Yes, Maybe in the future will finally come clean to
our audience about the truth and change it from beat
Brook to beat Bop. All right, you exit for a second.
Let's go over the rules thirty seconds to answer as
many questions as possible. If you don't know when you
could say pass that you have to beat her out right?
If you want to win? Are you ready?
Speaker 8 (59:03):
Ye?
Speaker 3 (59:03):
Can you beat the machine today?
Speaker 9 (59:05):
Mike?
Speaker 3 (59:06):
Let's find out? Good luck? Your time starts now. Today
is Cinco de Mayo celebrating Mexico's victory over what nation France,
Spain or the US Spain. McDonald's introduced the Big Mac
on this day in what decade? The fifties in Spanish?
What body part is your cabasa.
Speaker 10 (59:30):
Hand?
Speaker 3 (59:31):
What is the only state that begins with the letter pen?
In the Legend of Zelda video game franchise, what's the
name of the Princess no Idea? Princess no Idea? That
would be a brilliant actually would be.
Speaker 4 (59:49):
Lost, She's clueless.
Speaker 3 (59:50):
I'm on a quest to find I have no idea.
Let's see, Brook's gonna come back into the studio here,
and this is exciting. It says on my screen her
that Mike is planning a little summer getaway to Costa Rica.
What's your plans for your trip, Mike? You know, it's
just to get away.
Speaker 17 (01:00:09):
Our daughters graduating high school this year, and it's it'll
be a good send off trip.
Speaker 1 (01:00:15):
And are you just crying and crying? She's leaving.
Speaker 17 (01:00:19):
She's going to the freaking U dub So she's going
to be like twenty minutes away.
Speaker 1 (01:00:23):
Oh yeah, until you take her to Costa Rican.
Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
She meets a hot Costa Rican man and suddenly someone's
living in another country.
Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
Dad, I really got to study abroad.
Speaker 3 (01:00:37):
What activities are you planning in Costa Rica?
Speaker 17 (01:00:40):
We're staying at a resort that is essentially set up
for us to stay there the whole time we're there,
but we'll we'll end up doing some excursions. I'm sure
you know what.
Speaker 6 (01:00:51):
I bet if you asked his wife, she would have
a very long list of detailed Probably, Am I right?
Speaker 3 (01:00:57):
Absolutely?
Speaker 8 (01:00:58):
Absolutely? Well?
Speaker 3 (01:00:59):
Maybe could Brook interest you in a few factory tours
while you're visiting.
Speaker 4 (01:01:03):
Oh, I don't want to go.
Speaker 3 (01:01:05):
Into what she's making or the age of the workers there,
but she is very proud of the black market empire
that she has spent so hard buildings.
Speaker 1 (01:01:13):
It totally cool. As long as you're good to sign
an NDA cool.
Speaker 3 (01:01:19):
We'll send you all the info, maybe over email, Mike,
you can look into it. But now we got to
go to brook for her turn. Are you ready?
Speaker 1 (01:01:25):
You're ready?
Speaker 3 (01:01:25):
Your time starts now. Today is Cinco de Mayo celebrating
Mexico's victory over what nation? France, Spain or the US?
Speaker 1 (01:01:34):
It was France.
Speaker 3 (01:01:35):
McDonald's introduced the Big Mac on this day in what decade?
Speaker 1 (01:01:38):
Eighties?
Speaker 3 (01:01:39):
In Spanish? What body part is your.
Speaker 1 (01:01:41):
Cabasa ca besa is your head?
Speaker 3 (01:01:44):
What is the only state that begins with the letter
P Pennsylvania? In the Legend of Zelda video game franchise,
What is the name of the Princess?
Speaker 1 (01:01:53):
Pass?
Speaker 3 (01:01:54):
Shape of You? And Bad Habits are songs by what artists? Okay,
no answer.
Speaker 5 (01:02:02):
Immediately, way too soon.
Speaker 3 (01:02:04):
I didn't hear her saying a crudely quick I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (01:02:08):
I was trying to get in Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:02:10):
Oh my bad Okay answers are in Apparently, let's go
to the scoreboard to see how you did with Jose.
Speaker 8 (01:02:16):
Features like in the.
Speaker 11 (01:02:23):
Whole Studios Dancing Mike, you got one correct today.
Speaker 1 (01:02:28):
I know it was rough, yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:02:31):
And Brock was just get it over with. You got four.
Speaker 3 (01:02:36):
Torch you o today. But to your credit, she is
an ai, so you didn't really sting the chancewer. Let's
go over the answers for everybody. It's Cinco de Mayo
celebrating Mexico's victory over France. McDonald's introduced the Big Mac
on this day in the nineteen sixties. It came out
in nineteen sixty eight. No idea in Spanish. Your cabasa
(01:02:57):
is your head, Mike, be care for when you're in
Costa Rica talking about your cobasin.
Speaker 9 (01:03:07):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:03:09):
Only state that begins with the letter P is Pennsylvania.
The legend of Zelda video games, and the name of
the princess is Princess Zelda. Nobody knows Little Tricky shape
of you. Bad Habits both songs by the artist Ed Sheeran. So, Mike,
I'm sorry it was not enough to beat Brooke, but
just for playing, we are going to give you a
pair of tickets to see j Balvin at Climate Pledge
(01:03:31):
Arena on May sixteenth.
Speaker 2 (01:03:34):
Heck yeah, well, have fun Costa Rica, and don't cry
too much when your daughter graduates high school.
Speaker 1 (01:03:42):
Okay, it's embarrassing to her. Yes, that's what I mean.
Speaker 3 (01:03:47):
Heym I come back and play again soon. We're gonna
do win Brooks Bucks, same time tomorrow, Rookie Jeffrey in
the morning.
Hosts And Creators
Brooke Fox
Jeffrey "Young Jeffrey" Dubow
Alexis Fuller
Jose Bolanos
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