Masked Speaker: Crazy Fish Lady

One of our listeners says her life was changed forever in the most bizarre way, and it all started when she decided to accept a job at a pet store... now she needs to confess what happened!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
You don't hear me confession. I can't take back o arms.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
Speak text to seventy eighty five Nine's who says? Birthday
notifications on my Facebook usually remind me of people I
completely forgot existed, so I like to celebrate the occasion
by unfriending them immediately.

Speaker 1 (00:25):
Oh, I do.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Not engagement sometimes like I'm engaging, like, oh there's such
a cute copy. I have no chance anymore. I mean,
I would say delete your entire Facebook if that's how
you feel. But then where you're gonna hear your elderly
family members rant about all the problems with modern society, yeah, or.

Speaker 3 (00:43):
See your little cousin six.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
Exactly, So at least you can still hear people ranting
about their lives and their secrets right here anonymously on
the mass speaker. And we have a woman who's chosen
to use Cora as.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
Her fake identity today.

Speaker 2 (00:57):
So Cora, welcome to the show.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
Hello, how are you? Yea?

Speaker 3 (01:03):
On Facebook too?

Speaker 2 (01:07):
They're never going to know, but the voice changer is on.
You are the mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, let's hear
your confession.

Speaker 1 (01:12):
All right, perfect, So here's my confession. I absolutely love animals.

Speaker 2 (01:18):
Over hard take.

Speaker 3 (01:26):
Break it to you.

Speaker 1 (01:27):
I was like, maybe somewhere than others, but there is
more to the story. Again. A couple of years back,
I got a job at a pet storm. It was
and I really enjoyed it for the most part. But
there was one thing that was really hard. Okay, the
better fish in the store. And I know some people

(01:49):
say data, but I think the pronunciation is better. You
can use both, like the little colorful, tiny fish, but
aren't also.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
The ones that are aggressive?

Speaker 1 (01:59):
Yeh have to be alone. You have to have to
separate them.

Speaker 3 (02:03):
They're literally the fish that everyone buys for their elementary
school kid.

Speaker 2 (02:06):
Yeah, we do know them.

Speaker 1 (02:09):
What about them, Well, at this particular store, I would
say they cheat them really, just very very poorly. Oh
you know the policy, at least in my store. I've
heard other stores too. They're left in these tiny little
plastic cups.

Speaker 3 (02:27):
Oh, I've seen that. I mean they're almost it's like
one step up from getting a goldfish at the fair
in a baggy.

Speaker 1 (02:34):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Are you saying that they get put in those cups
and then they never come out.

Speaker 1 (02:37):
Yeah, they never come out. I would just stand at
the cast register which faces you know these cup a fish,
and it completely broke my heart.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
I've seen them at the end where they're like it's
almost like an n rack on a sales like it looks.

Speaker 2 (02:53):
So, yeah, that's definitely hard to look at every single day.

Speaker 1 (02:57):
I'n sure. It was really hard. And as you can imagine,
sometimes the pet store is busy, other times it's quite boring.
Oh so I started naming them all. I thought it
was cute, and I told the manager, I can replace
the water in the cups if you need to, and
he was just like, it's not worth the effort. So

(03:18):
I think I'm the only one that cares about these.
So after a month of seeing this happen, I thought
somebody has to do something. Okay, Okay, So I started
saving up my money and using my own money to
buy them, and I would take them my apartment and
give them a proper home.

Speaker 3 (03:38):
Dude, you're such a kind of person. I would have been, like,
I worked for the store. I'm going to take those yeah,
and then I'm just going to tell my manager that
they died.

Speaker 1 (03:46):
How did you have separated?

Speaker 2 (03:47):
You put them in cups?

Speaker 1 (03:48):
Honestly, that was really smart. I should have done that,
but I want to but yeah, like you were saying,
you can't put two together because they'll kill each other.
They fight each other off. So what did you do? So?
I basically had to start buying little fish tanks for
every betefish that I rescued, the environments and stuff.

Speaker 2 (04:11):
Well, how many are we talking here? Oh that's a
good question. I mean how many fish tanks can you
have in one apartment room?

Speaker 1 (04:19):
I literally had about thirty tanks all over my room
with one fish in each of them. Oh my, what
it was like the world's saddus most like low budget aquarium.

Speaker 3 (04:32):
Teaching to do tricks and charge people entry, just like you.
But why is this a secret that sounds like a
lovely thing to do?

Speaker 1 (04:40):
Rescue them? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (04:41):
And you love your beta, right?

Speaker 1 (04:43):
I do? But I guess not everyone does. Because one
night I had a date and they came back to
my place and I totally forgot I have a wall
of fish, and it completely streaked this guy out, and
I realized that I have to stop rescuing every fish.

Speaker 2 (05:03):
Yeah, because you have an aquarium in your house.

Speaker 1 (05:05):
Big.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
Instead of crazy cat lady, she's crazy fish ladies.

Speaker 1 (05:08):
Yeah, yeah, that's true. I definitely had to quit my
job at the pet store because if I didn't quit
would have been saving all the things. Yeah, wow, and
the turtles.

Speaker 3 (05:20):
You'll find the person who loves animals just as much
as you do.

Speaker 1 (05:23):
You find a zoo keeper a date. I hope that'd
be great.

Speaker 2 (05:27):
Yeah, he's gonna steal animals from the zoo.

Speaker 1 (05:29):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (05:30):
So what way did you come on to the mass speaker?
Do you regret your decisions?

Speaker 1 (05:34):
Like?

Speaker 2 (05:35):
Why do you feel so guilty about it?

Speaker 1 (05:37):
Do I forget what I didn't know? I don't, but
I do it again. Yes, I would, but it's one
of the reasons why I can't go into pet stores anymore.
Save all of them.

Speaker 3 (05:49):
And you can't leave for vacation on the weekend because
somebody's got to feed all those damn fish.

Speaker 1 (05:52):
Yeah, oh yeah, exactly.

Speaker 3 (05:55):
Also, don't get any cats.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Oh, that would be an awful situation. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
I think Beetafish like to fight and scratch each other.
Two cats in the same room, Oh my god, I
met the cats. Oh, I met the cats. We eat
each other, cats get along. We've been some violent, violent cats.

Speaker 3 (06:11):
Where I dress how cats work?

Speaker 2 (06:13):
Okay, Well, you're doing God's work for us. Save all
those betefish, keep them separated, and text in seventy five
nine too. If you have a confession you've been holding
on to, we can hide your identity, mask your voice,
and make you our next mass speaker.

Speaker 1 (06:28):
Your phone's apps coming up Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.