April 29, 2025 • 6 mins
Most people will tell small lies to their grandparents just to make them happy... but one of our listeners told a MUCH BIGGER lie to his grandmother... and now a year later the guilt is still eating him up inside...
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
You don't confession, I can't take back all arms.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Mouse Speaker text to seventy five nine, who says, for
the last ten or so years, whenever my husband and
I vote by mail, I always take our ballots with
me to the grocery store so I can just drop
them in the mailbox.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
There.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Fine, but I only realized last week it's not really
a mailbox I've been using.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
It's a food donation.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Ba.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
I am so embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
I can't tell my husband our votes haven't counted for
ten years.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Yea, god that you've insulted the poor food donation.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Some guys like, is this an edible voting? I just
know the election conspiracy folks are gonna go nuts for
that quote.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
There.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Yeah, I will butt our vote didn't count. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Somebody voted for an Apple Corps. This is why we
keep listeners and non us here on the mass speaker,
so they can confess to rigging and throwing government elections
guilt free on our show. Let's meet today's secret keeper,
who's chosen to go by the name Perry today. Perry Welcome,
Hey guys, he is your last name Winkle, No, that's
(01:17):
not my confession. You got a half laugh from him,
Brooke that that was good.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
Just try to lighten the mood because you sound kind
of serious.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Perry. Well, the voice changer is on. You are the
mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, let's hear your confession.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Man, all right, I need to make a pretty serious confession.
I'm glad you guys are masking my voice.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
Okay, okay, So what's up.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Last year, my grandmother got really thick. I'm sorry, so hard,
thank you. So she was in the hospital. It was
getting serious. The doctors were telling us that they weren't
very optimistic about her chances.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
Yeah, that's so hard, I know.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
So I went into the hospital to see her, thinking,
this is probably the last time I'm going to see her.
And one thing my grandmother she always wanted was for
me to fall in love and get married and have
a family.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Oh sweet Grandma, she actually wanted that.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
She did. She always would ask me about it and stuff,
and I just wanted to make her happy. So I
told her that I got engaged. Okay, but I didn't.
There was no real girl.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
I yes, we're all shocked. Wait, why why.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
I showed her like a random picture of the straw
on Instagram, and I was like, yeah, this is my fiancee.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I thought I was going to show Brooks picture.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Maybe.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I mean, it's kind of like, no harm, no failure. Yeah,
your heart's in the right place.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
I mean, you shouldn't be lying to her, but you're
doing it for the right reasons.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
A couple of weeks went by and she started getting better.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Oh I want to say, oh no, but that's a
good thing.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Yeah, no, it was a good thing. Everyone was very happy.
A couple more weeks but she got out of the hospital.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Grandma, Oh my god, what stubborn old lady. She was
inspired by the news that her grandson is about to
fall in love and get married.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
Wait, I mean, like, you're so happy, but you're probably
also kind of freaking out right.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Yeah, like she thinks I'm still engaged to this day. Yeah,
it's been a year.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Oh my god, why can't you be like most grandmas
and have a bad memory.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Yeah, when you finally actually do get a girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
Though, that's not even like the thing I'm worried about,
that would be great because I could just kind of
fudge the picture a little bit, or maybe I don't know, or.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Maybe blame it on her memory, like, no, Graham, Yes,
she must be like curious about it over if it's
gone on for the past year.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Yeah, I mean she asks me all the time. She's like,
how's mad It's sin she remembers her name and showing
her Yeah, I keep showing her the same picture. I'm like, look,
she's out the brunch with these same girls she loves
going to brunch grandma, you know.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Like it just the same brunch photo.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Brunch picture. Yeah. Remember he's not that great, but like
she's no, like a brunch group.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
So you're gonna get how have you not gotten outed
by another family member?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
No, my mom knows, like I told my mom, And
my mom's like, you cannot tell her.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
They left you.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Like you will? That might kill her. Yeah, you guys,
I don't even think you like she made a Christmas
stocking with her name on it, expects she gave me
a birthday card for her.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
But you at least pocketed the money out of the car.
I mean, yeah, that's fine.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
You're away.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
What do you tell her?
Speaker 1 (04:58):
It gets worse, It gets worse. We're singing. The last
time I saw her, she told me that she wrote
Madison into her will.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Oh oh god, Okay, now we may need to like,
Madison may need to cheat on you or something, you know.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
No, no, that would kill her. That would kill I'm like,
I'm considering hiring an actress at this point.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
Okay, James Madison. That that's rough, man.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
Yeah, I never thought trying to do something nice would
turn out so badly.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
So when are you going to send her her your
wedding invitation or.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
No? I don't know.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
I can't wait to see your guys grandbabies, I mean
her great grandchildren are going to be a door.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Oh yeah, you must be on the like the dating
apps right now with a filter for only Madison's at
this point.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Right, it just has to be a pet name, Jeffrey.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Oh yeah, yeah, Madison.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
Is just her name's Rebecca, but I call her Madison. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
I keep trying to come up with stuff. Oh man,
the longer.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
I feel like, you're really going to meet a girl,
and at this point you're gonna have to have a
fake grandma to introduce her to you.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Now, Yeah, you know you got a lot ahead of you, dude.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
We wish you, like, yeah, here's the good news. You
have been in a successful, committed relationship for an entire
year now, which that's more than most couples that I know,
even if she is imaginary.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
That broke up.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Hey, listen, this couple is perfect. So we are proud
of you, buddy. You keep that going okay, and text
in the seven, eight, five nine too.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
If you have a confession you've been holding on to,
we can hide your identity, mask your voice, and make
you our next mass speaker.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Your phone TAP's coming up right after this, brooking Jeffrey
in the morning,
You don't confession, I can't take back all arms.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Mouse Speaker text to seventy five nine, who says, for
the last ten or so years, whenever my husband and
I vote by mail, I always take our ballots with
me to the grocery store so I can just drop
them in the mailbox.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
There.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Fine, but I only realized last week it's not really
a mailbox I've been using.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
It's a food donation.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Ba.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
I am so embarrassed.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
I can't tell my husband our votes haven't counted for
ten years.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Yea, god that you've insulted the poor food donation.
Speaker 3 (00:42):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Some guys like, is this an edible voting? I just
know the election conspiracy folks are gonna go nuts for
that quote.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
There.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Yeah, I will butt our vote didn't count. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Somebody voted for an Apple Corps. This is why we
keep listeners and non us here on the mass speaker,
so they can confess to rigging and throwing government elections
guilt free on our show. Let's meet today's secret keeper,
who's chosen to go by the name Perry today. Perry Welcome,
Hey guys, he is your last name Winkle, No, that's
(01:17):
not my confession. You got a half laugh from him,
Brooke that that was good.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
Just try to lighten the mood because you sound kind
of serious.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Perry. Well, the voice changer is on. You are the
mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, let's hear your confession.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Man, all right, I need to make a pretty serious confession.
I'm glad you guys are masking my voice.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
Okay, okay, So what's up.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Last year, my grandmother got really thick. I'm sorry, so hard,
thank you. So she was in the hospital. It was
getting serious. The doctors were telling us that they weren't
very optimistic about her chances.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
Yeah, that's so hard, I know.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
So I went into the hospital to see her, thinking,
this is probably the last time I'm going to see her.
And one thing my grandmother she always wanted was for
me to fall in love and get married and have
a family.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
Oh sweet Grandma, she actually wanted that.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
She did. She always would ask me about it and stuff,
and I just wanted to make her happy. So I
told her that I got engaged. Okay, but I didn't.
There was no real girl.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
I yes, we're all shocked. Wait, why why.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
I showed her like a random picture of the straw
on Instagram, and I was like, yeah, this is my fiancee.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I thought I was going to show Brooks picture.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Maybe.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I mean, it's kind of like, no harm, no failure. Yeah,
your heart's in the right place.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
I mean, you shouldn't be lying to her, but you're
doing it for the right reasons.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
A couple of weeks went by and she started getting better.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Oh I want to say, oh no, but that's a
good thing.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Yeah, no, it was a good thing. Everyone was very happy.
A couple more weeks but she got out of the hospital.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Grandma, Oh my god, what stubborn old lady. She was
inspired by the news that her grandson is about to
fall in love and get married.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
Wait, I mean, like, you're so happy, but you're probably
also kind of freaking out right.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Yeah, like she thinks I'm still engaged to this day. Yeah,
it's been a year.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
Oh my god, why can't you be like most grandmas
and have a bad memory.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Yeah, when you finally actually do get a girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
Though, that's not even like the thing I'm worried about,
that would be great because I could just kind of
fudge the picture a little bit, or maybe I don't know, or.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Maybe blame it on her memory, like, no, Graham, Yes,
she must be like curious about it over if it's
gone on for the past year.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Yeah, I mean she asks me all the time. She's like,
how's mad It's sin she remembers her name and showing
her Yeah, I keep showing her the same picture. I'm like, look,
she's out the brunch with these same girls she loves
going to brunch grandma, you know.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Like it just the same brunch photo.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
Brunch picture. Yeah. Remember he's not that great, but like
she's no, like a brunch group.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
So you're gonna get how have you not gotten outed
by another family member?
Speaker 1 (04:21):
No, my mom knows, like I told my mom, And
my mom's like, you cannot tell her.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
They left you.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Like you will? That might kill her. Yeah, you guys,
I don't even think you like she made a Christmas
stocking with her name on it, expects she gave me
a birthday card for her.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
But you at least pocketed the money out of the car.
I mean, yeah, that's fine.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
You're away.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
What do you tell her?
Speaker 1 (04:58):
It gets worse, It gets worse. We're singing. The last
time I saw her, she told me that she wrote
Madison into her will.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Oh oh god, Okay, now we may need to like,
Madison may need to cheat on you or something, you know.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
No, no, that would kill her. That would kill I'm like,
I'm considering hiring an actress at this point.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
Okay, James Madison. That that's rough, man.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
Yeah, I never thought trying to do something nice would
turn out so badly.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
So when are you going to send her her your
wedding invitation or.
Speaker 1 (05:33):
No? I don't know.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
I can't wait to see your guys grandbabies, I mean
her great grandchildren are going to be a door.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Oh yeah, you must be on the like the dating
apps right now with a filter for only Madison's at
this point.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
Right, it just has to be a pet name, Jeffrey.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Oh yeah, yeah, Madison.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
Is just her name's Rebecca, but I call her Madison. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
I keep trying to come up with stuff. Oh man,
the longer.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
I feel like, you're really going to meet a girl,
and at this point you're gonna have to have a
fake grandma to introduce her to you.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Now, Yeah, you know you got a lot ahead of you, dude.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
We wish you, like, yeah, here's the good news. You
have been in a successful, committed relationship for an entire
year now, which that's more than most couples that I know,
even if she is imaginary.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
That broke up.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Hey, listen, this couple is perfect. So we are proud
of you, buddy. You keep that going okay, and text
in the seven, eight, five nine too.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
If you have a confession you've been holding on to,
we can hide your identity, mask your voice, and make
you our next mass speaker.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
Your phone TAP's coming up right after this, brooking Jeffrey
in the morning,
Hosts And Creators
Brooke Fox
Jeffrey "Young Jeffrey" Dubow
Alexis Fuller
Jose Bolanos
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