June 3, 2024 • 6 mins
We scoured the back pages of Craigslist to find the best (or is it Worst?) entries from their Missed Connections section! Whether you're a hopeless romantic or just plain hopeless, Missed Connections might be the place for you!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey City Misconnections.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
That was me staring.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
There's only two places to find true love in this world.
One is at the Olive Garden after turning that giant
bubbling vat of marenera sauce into a mini hot tub.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
For two okay because the share an.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
The other is on the pages of craigslist dot org.
We scour that website every week to find the best
misconnections that they have to offer, like this first one
titled care for some Lama Sutra haha man for woman
thirties Downtown. I noticed you while I was attending the
Moonlight Lama yoga.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Class at the Community Center.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
So cute. You were the thin blonde with the Camo
sports bra and invisible eyebrows.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Where did they go? Are they just not?
Speaker 1 (00:48):
There?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Went pretty ham in the late nineties. I love a
woman wrapped in mystery.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
At one point I heard the instructor call out to you, Yulia,
what a gorgeous name is that Chinese if Sonhow.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Maybe he's a much more worldly man I've never met.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
We were both trying to find our zen in the
midst of curious lamas wandering around.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
That is amazing. I want to go to Lama ya.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
And that's when I noticed you staring, and I didn't
shy away.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
I stared right back at you.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
That lasted for about twenty seconds until I realized you
were trying to draw my attention to a rogue lama
who was chewing on my yoga mat like it was
a piece of dried mango.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh goat yoga as well, yeah everything, yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Later, I tried to get your attention by attempting a
new move I called awkward alpaca. It's similar to downward dog,
but with a lot more neck. Let me know if
you want to get some boba and hit up a
different yoga class this time, no lama drama.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
That's from Blaine. This is one of my favorite children's books.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
This next misconnection is titled missed Enchantment Man for Woman,
twenties Renaissance fairse and it literally says trumpet sounds at
the start, so.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Here hear ye in the days of yore, at the
fair of Renaissance, I came upon thy tent of fortune
telling and laid mine eyes on the fairest.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Of temptresses I had ever seen.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
That's was you, sweet lady, pythought, I thought, Pythoart Thart part.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
It's better.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
I don't understand with words most cryptic and Bosom's most bountiful,
you gave it to me mine future. You speaketh that
I would soon encounter the love of my life. Ah, And,
judging by your wandering eye and fickled tongue, I pondered,
did you mean thyself perchance.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
For their tongue?
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Emboldened by love, I left, drank some grog and vanquished
some pitiful nights, then returned with a flower I hath
stolen off another maiden's dress. Yes, I can be a
naughty lark at times. When I doth returned, you had vanished,
like Merlin the enchanter. Oh, perhaps to participate in the
(03:30):
wet tunic contest happening yonder by the pumpkin Tribuche That happened,
sadly I missed it because my job at ye local
car wash was a calling. Hence, if ye fair maiden
doth lay eyes on this confession of love, wave the
flag of romance over the spot where we first met
at the nearest full moon. Oh, wow, I will wait
(03:54):
for you in earnest or cometh by ye old car wash. Yeah,
for fan maidens like yourself, I think the car wash.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Is going to be a safe for bet my man
than to flag it at what moonlight fla.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
This is also a horse walk that was signed to
Oliver I love it.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
He deserves some love.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
This next misconnection is titled tag You're Definitely it oh
Man for woman thirties laser tag Arena. Oh, you were
the only other solo adult that I got paired with
at a birthday party full of twelve year old boys.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
I haven't been since I was twelve. Shit, I didn't
tell you. I went down long ago.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
Fun it is, but everything feels smaller when you were a.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Kid because it was a huge build. Totally. They go on,
were you the mom?
Speaker 1 (04:48):
I'm not sure, but you did approach me and asked
if I knew any of the children.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Oh, I mean it. You don't want the one strange
dude in a dark room. That's a red flash.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
I did, But to tell you the truth, I made
that up only because I've been asked that before and
then got promptly escorted out of the premise.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I didn't want that to happen again. But you were smart.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
A few seconds later you asked my name, and I
told you John Stamos nineteen eighty three.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
No, you are not that handle. That's my code name online.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Yes, if you want, you can use that to see
my bio on the professional laser tag ranking sites.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Dude, I feel like that adds some legitimacy to him,
though he.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Says I was actually in the top three hundred a
few years ago, but dropped out because of COVID. That
and my ex girlfriend spread rumors about me juicing my
laser and ranked competitions, which.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Is complete bs. By the way, bring his own laser?
Is it by laser?
Speaker 1 (06:00):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Anyway, It was fun to play with you, even if
you are an amateur.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Did you notice during the second game I human shielded
you by the barricade. That's when I took the opportunity
to smell your hair. Is that Suave Essentials Ocean Breeze?
I only know because my aunt uses the same one
Ocean Breeze.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Even blue Bottle.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
Maybe we can hang out sometime and play a little
one on one this time, no guns, no kids, and
definitely no clothes, but still.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Lasers of course. Yeah yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Signed John Stamos nine three aka Dougie Peterson Junior.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Okay, I'm company to bleep. That did you put your
whole name on here?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
That's your Craigslist smithsconnections for the week.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
We're gonna do your phone tap right after this. Brooking
Jeffrey in the morning
Hey City Misconnections.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
That was me staring.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
There's only two places to find true love in this world.
One is at the Olive Garden after turning that giant
bubbling vat of marenera sauce into a mini hot tub.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
For two okay because the share an.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
The other is on the pages of craigslist dot org.
We scour that website every week to find the best
misconnections that they have to offer, like this first one
titled care for some Lama Sutra haha man for woman
thirties Downtown. I noticed you while I was attending the
Moonlight Lama yoga.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Class at the Community Center.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
So cute. You were the thin blonde with the Camo
sports bra and invisible eyebrows.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Where did they go? Are they just not?
Speaker 1 (00:48):
There?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Went pretty ham in the late nineties. I love a
woman wrapped in mystery.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
At one point I heard the instructor call out to you, Yulia,
what a gorgeous name is that Chinese if Sonhow.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
Maybe he's a much more worldly man I've never met.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
We were both trying to find our zen in the
midst of curious lamas wandering around.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
That is amazing. I want to go to Lama ya.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
And that's when I noticed you staring, and I didn't
shy away.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
I stared right back at you.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
That lasted for about twenty seconds until I realized you
were trying to draw my attention to a rogue lama
who was chewing on my yoga mat like it was
a piece of dried mango.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh goat yoga as well, yeah everything, yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:45):
Later, I tried to get your attention by attempting a
new move I called awkward alpaca. It's similar to downward dog,
but with a lot more neck. Let me know if
you want to get some boba and hit up a
different yoga class this time, no lama drama.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
That's from Blaine. This is one of my favorite children's books.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
This next misconnection is titled missed Enchantment Man for Woman,
twenties Renaissance fairse and it literally says trumpet sounds at
the start, so.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Here hear ye in the days of yore, at the
fair of Renaissance, I came upon thy tent of fortune
telling and laid mine eyes on the fairest.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Of temptresses I had ever seen.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
That's was you, sweet lady, pythought, I thought, Pythoart Thart part.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
It's better.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
I don't understand with words most cryptic and Bosom's most bountiful,
you gave it to me mine future. You speaketh that
I would soon encounter the love of my life. Ah, And,
judging by your wandering eye and fickled tongue, I pondered,
did you mean thyself perchance.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
For their tongue?
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Emboldened by love, I left, drank some grog and vanquished
some pitiful nights, then returned with a flower I hath
stolen off another maiden's dress. Yes, I can be a
naughty lark at times. When I doth returned, you had vanished,
like Merlin the enchanter. Oh, perhaps to participate in the
(03:30):
wet tunic contest happening yonder by the pumpkin Tribuche That happened,
sadly I missed it because my job at ye local
car wash was a calling. Hence, if ye fair maiden
doth lay eyes on this confession of love, wave the
flag of romance over the spot where we first met
at the nearest full moon. Oh, wow, I will wait
(03:54):
for you in earnest or cometh by ye old car wash. Yeah,
for fan maidens like yourself, I think the car wash.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Is going to be a safe for bet my man
than to flag it at what moonlight fla.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
This is also a horse walk that was signed to
Oliver I love it.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
He deserves some love.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
This next misconnection is titled tag You're Definitely it oh
Man for woman thirties laser tag Arena. Oh, you were
the only other solo adult that I got paired with
at a birthday party full of twelve year old boys.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
I haven't been since I was twelve. Shit, I didn't
tell you. I went down long ago.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
Fun it is, but everything feels smaller when you were a.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Kid because it was a huge build. Totally. They go on,
were you the mom?
Speaker 1 (04:48):
I'm not sure, but you did approach me and asked
if I knew any of the children.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Oh, I mean it. You don't want the one strange
dude in a dark room. That's a red flash.
Speaker 1 (05:00):
I did, But to tell you the truth, I made
that up only because I've been asked that before and
then got promptly escorted out of the premise.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I didn't want that to happen again. But you were smart.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
A few seconds later you asked my name, and I
told you John Stamos nineteen eighty three.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
No, you are not that handle. That's my code name online.
Speaker 1 (05:26):
Yes, if you want, you can use that to see
my bio on the professional laser tag ranking sites.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Dude, I feel like that adds some legitimacy to him,
though he.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Says I was actually in the top three hundred a
few years ago, but dropped out because of COVID. That
and my ex girlfriend spread rumors about me juicing my
laser and ranked competitions, which.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Is complete bs. By the way, bring his own laser?
Is it by laser?
Speaker 1 (06:00):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Anyway, It was fun to play with you, even if
you are an amateur.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Did you notice during the second game I human shielded
you by the barricade. That's when I took the opportunity
to smell your hair. Is that Suave Essentials Ocean Breeze?
I only know because my aunt uses the same one
Ocean Breeze.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Even blue Bottle.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
Maybe we can hang out sometime and play a little
one on one this time, no guns, no kids, and
definitely no clothes, but still.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Lasers of course. Yeah yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Signed John Stamos nine three aka Dougie Peterson Junior.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
Okay, I'm company to bleep. That did you put your
whole name on here?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
That's your Craigslist smithsconnections for the week.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
We're gonna do your phone tap right after this. Brooking
Jeffrey in the morning
Hosts And Creators
Brooke Fox
Jeffrey "Young Jeffrey" Dubow
Alexis Fuller
Jose Bolanos
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