Phone Tap: Automated Driving Test

Today’s Phone Tap victim recently renewed his driver’s license but before it’s official we have one more tiny quiz for him to take to seal the deal!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
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Speaker 2 (00:16):
We call a guy who needs to renew his driver's
license and he thinks it's already a done deal because
he's paid the money online. He got a confirmation notice,
but unfortunately we tell him he has to complete one
final step with the help of our AI chat Botty flour. No,
it's always fun when he comes on. It's your phone
tap right now?

Speaker 3 (00:42):
Hello, Hi, this is Oliver Clothes off from the Department
of Licensing. Is this mister Michael Resh?

Speaker 4 (00:48):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (00:49):
This is this is him.

Speaker 3 (00:50):
I'm calling because we receive your request to renew your
driver's license. Yeah, yeah, it's me. Great, okay, so it
looks like you already paid the renewal fee, which is awesome.
You have to do in order for me to process
this is just pass the test and then we can
move forward. What at the test? Yeah, the test. According
to our records it's been about fifteen years since you've

(01:11):
taken the actual driving test, so we need you to wait.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
You're asking me to come down to the DMV and
take a driving test again.

Speaker 3 (01:19):
Well, no, no, we can actually do it over the
phone nowadays. It's just an oral exam through the automated system.

Speaker 1 (01:25):
Oh my god, are you kidding?

Speaker 3 (01:27):
It only asks you a few basic questions about driving,
and all you have to do is get eighty percent correct.

Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's really simple.

Speaker 2 (01:34):
Everyone passes.

Speaker 4 (01:36):
Okay, it's a test over the phone.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
You're gonna ask me questions.

Speaker 3 (01:40):
Well, I won't be the one doing it. The automated
system does all the work. I just need your permission
to send you through.

Speaker 4 (01:46):
Sure.

Speaker 3 (01:47):
Great, Please hold up.

Speaker 1 (01:54):
Uh, I'm taking a drogging test, give me a stack,
and I'm taking.

Speaker 4 (02:01):
A Welcome to the DMV's automated test for driver's fluency.
Please answer the following questions. Shall we begin? Oh?

Speaker 1 (02:11):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (02:12):
Question one? In the United States of America, which side
of the road do you drive on? Hey, the right
side be the left side, see whatever side you want
to What is this d I am not comfortable choosing
sides because of my religious beliefs. The right side I

(02:38):
am sorry, that's incorrect. What the correct answer was, Hey,
the right side.

Speaker 1 (02:44):
That's right, said mist and D.

Speaker 4 (02:47):
As a nation, we need to respect all people's religious beliefs.

Speaker 2 (02:51):
Oh my god.

Speaker 4 (02:52):
Question two. When driving towards a stop sign located inside
a stop oriented stop zone upon the first spotting of
said stops indicating an upcoming stopping point, where must one
stop at the stop indicated line stoppage?

Speaker 1 (03:08):
Is this a joke?

Speaker 4 (03:09):
Your options are ay at the stop sign, B at
the sign of the first stop sign spotting now at
the stop the top spot of the stop sign at
the spot before the time of stop sign stoppage, or
D don't stop, just keep on driving anymore.

Speaker 1 (03:29):
A A A A A.

Speaker 4 (03:32):
I am sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer was the
top spot of the stop sign at the spot before
the time of stop sign stoppage.

Speaker 3 (03:40):
What the hell is wrong with this?

Speaker 1 (03:42):
I don't want to take the test anymore.

Speaker 4 (03:44):
Last question, No, No, you have just turned left right
at the end of the lane that you have just
left before reversing right into a space left of the
left hand lane on the right hand of the lane
where you just left. What should you do? Options are, Hey,
this is too stupid. Turn left, turn left twice, then

(04:06):
right at the end of the street. Four c to
the left, to the left. Everything you own in a
box to the left.

Speaker 1 (04:14):
That's a Stricken Beyonce song.

Speaker 4 (04:17):
I am sorry, that's incorrect.

Speaker 1 (04:19):
I'm sorry, you're incorrect.

Speaker 4 (04:21):
Thank you for taking the DMV's automated test for drivers.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
Thank you, Thank you.

Speaker 4 (04:26):
Have score day zero percent.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
I love living here.

Speaker 4 (04:29):
The next time you are eligible to apply for renewal
is in four years from today. Goodbye, stupid, this is and.

Speaker 3 (04:37):
Now I gotta wait for the Hey, Michael, this is
all over?

Speaker 1 (04:42):
Yeah, hey, body was.

Speaker 3 (04:43):
You said you finished the test? How'd you do?

Speaker 4 (04:45):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (04:46):
I didn't get anything right? This what is it?

Speaker 4 (04:48):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (04:48):
Are you talking about the fake driving test I made
you take or the print call I just did on you?

Speaker 2 (04:54):
You gotta be kidding me.

Speaker 3 (04:56):
Yeah, because this is jose from Brook and Jeffrey in
the morning. We're doing a phone tap on you.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
That's the dumbest Yeah, no, no, y'all are.

Speaker 4 (05:05):
It's funny?

Speaker 2 (05:06):
Come on, all right, give me a second to find
it funny? Freaking me out?

Speaker 3 (05:11):
Yeah, I don't know what your problem is, man, It's
pretty simple. I mean, the top spot of a stop
zone you never to stop at the stop sign? Or
do you stop when you.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
Top top of the top.

Speaker 3 (05:22):
Everybody knows the answer to that, Bro, you can get
off the road.

Speaker 1 (05:26):
It gave me like flashbacks for the very first time
I actually took the tab

Speaker 4 (05:32):
The week of every morning was foom taps weekday mornings
on the twenties, Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning,