Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
What is the mini retirement update? How's it going? Is? It?
Has it started?
Speaker 2 (00:03):
So it's gonna look a little bit different and it's
not as like planned out as I thought it would
be by this point, but it's all coming together. Everything
is fallen into place, and I'm just excited for what's
to come.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
I think that's a word. Especially as moms, we're so unfree. Hey,
ba fan, welcome to the Brown table, Welcome to Brown Ambition.
I have the beautiful, the stunning Nasima McElroy here with
me financially intentional. If you're not already following her on ig,
(00:39):
I'm not sure what you're waiting for. That's your main channel, right,
Are you also TikTok famous? I'm I'm not a TikToker,
not yet. I need to, I need to. But yeah,
it's a lot to man. If they would just be
friends and you could upload one thing there and then both,
but they're both. It's two, they're two petties. It's a
whole different a whole different universe over there. Yeah, but
I'm so grateful. We both just got back for some travel.
(01:03):
I think your trip was probably more beautiful than mine.
But you tell me you were at Lake Tahoe. Yes,
it was. It was actually pretty beautiful with serene.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
It was like hot and I don't know, like most
people don't know like Lake Tahoe facts, but it's so
deep that the water never really warms up, like it's
always super cold.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
But because of.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Global warming, it was kind of tolerable enough that you
can kind of get into get in it. So we
had a good time out there. And I have a
really good friend who is actually in the personal finance community.
Her name is Lisa Peterson. She wrote the book The
Mindful Millionaire. Her daughter has a house out there, and
(01:46):
her daughter has like this crazy social media following she's
called the adventure Addicts. And so yeah, her daughter was
able to buy a house in Lake Tahoe. But I've
been knowing her since her was like still in college,
and so to be able to watch their journey and
then to be able to like go and share and
(02:08):
all that stuff was like beautiful. And it's like she's
one of the kind of people that I look to
for like parenting advice. So it was great. We had
a good Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
So she gets so her daughter hosted that's crazy to
think one day My best was one of my good friends.
Their kid may host me at their house, her daughters
in her.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
And so she was house sitting and so you know,
we got to enjoy the fruits of her labor.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
I love that even more because then you can get
up to no good and you don't have like the
kid whose diapers used to change there watching you get
drunk two in them afternoon for just me.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
But it was it was great. It was a lovely
experience and just oh my goodness, the nature, the whole
familion and all the kids. They really enjoyed themselves. And
we actually used to live around that area. Well we
used to live around like Tahoe as well, but on
in other parts. We had never been to that side,
so it was a good experience. They but they don't
really remember it.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Who yeah, oh ok.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
Yeah, Like this one was born there and she's like,
I want to go back and I want to live there,
and I'm just like.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
You don't even like remember what it was like, but
you can't tell her that. So well, I love that.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Well, the last time you were on the show. It's
been a couple of months since you and you Elli
were on the show, so we were soft launching a
Boo and we were hard launching many retirement. I want
updates on both, which one, which one we're doing? We
can play it cute and skip the boo. We can
go then retirement.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Oh, listen, the boo situation is situationing like it's great.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Oh, I don't know why I got worried. You're playing
it too cool. Yeah, it's We're good. That's going well.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Yeah, you'll see I think you'll see more of that
situation play out.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
So I've been gone for a week though. So my
trip was I went to Atlanta. I was in Atlanta
four oh yes, yes, yes, eight days with me and
Remi ru. My dad just had a kidney transplant, and
I was there to shuttle him from appointments and just
just like have eyes on the eagle because that man
cannot be trusted, especially not with no new organ in
(04:28):
his body, and to babysit him basically while my brother
was out of town. But while I was gone, my
five year old and my husband were here to their
own devices. And I had really had to let go
and let God because I knew I'd be coming back
to all of my beautiful systems being destroyed. I knew
(04:49):
that I knew bedtime was a rap. I knew bathtime
maybe once or twice once. Let's not talk about it.
When he when when real jumped in my arms at
the airport. I mean he smelled okay, but his hair, oh,
oh my god, the hair was neglected. The curls were sad,
they were it was giving. I mean, all hair texture
(05:12):
is beautiful, but it was giving like straw, you know,
like he clearly had not been bathed or his hair
had not been washed and moisturized since pool day last Tuesday,
okay and pool day, Oh god, oh my god, I
don't know. I can't even but I got back yesterday
and I am slowly just piecing this house back together
(05:35):
to uh, did you at least get to see biance again?
Oh my god, on my mouth, my voice back down
to we're jumping all over the place. This is very
adhd of me. Undiagnosed, very much undignosed, diagnosed. I'm very diagnosed.
(05:59):
Oh my god, I see Beyonce again. Yes I did,
And it was the best decision I ever made. I
haven't felt that way about spending money like where since
my wedding. Really, Like I can think of a couple
things that have I have been like, oh, that was
worth every overpriced dollar my wedding, because that was a time, beautiful, stunning,
(06:19):
ten out of ten. I love it and going to
see Beyonce, I'm never not getting fed. Like I'm leaving
there full if you're open, like if you go with
the right mindset, if you go to like have a
good time, because I don't know. I was sitting next
to people when Atlanta who were just sat there like
where I was in the floor seats, but they literally
just wanted to sit in their seats. Yeah, and Atlanta
(06:40):
I was so confused, interesting and weren't singing and screaming
every song. And I'm like the way I come out
of my own body when I'm at a Beyonce show,
i am just like feral. I am singing every lyric,
I am talking to her through the songs. I am
losing my voice. But it was such a good use
(07:02):
of money. I just I love money so much. I
love it so much because it gives me that kind
of experience. And I went by myself, which was very
grown woman. That is very grown. I did have a
bit of drama though I shared this on Yeah, I
was so under it because like the last thing I
saw like it was like your tickets wasn't right. And
(07:24):
then so I bought the ticket because when I booked
my trip to Georgia, it was only a few weeks ago,
and I mean I was I wasn't going. It wasn't
the point of my trip. My point was to be
there for Dad. I stayed a lot longer than I
might have if Beyonce hadn't been in town that weekend.
I was like the volunteers Tribute, I'll take care of dad. Yes,
(07:44):
I'm the best daughter ever. Meanwhile, me get on StubHub
and I don't know why I didn't just go to Ticketmaster.
I forget how I ended up on StubHub. I have
bought tickets on StubHub before. I don't remember it being
a situation where you didn't get your tickets immediately and
you had to wait. And because of that, I bought
the tickets. They were like five hundred dollars made about
(08:06):
a ticket five hundred bucks, and I bought the ticket
I wanted I have been. I just saw her in London,
me and my friend. We we were standing in the
honeybuck and pit on the side of the stage, so
close you know, next to the fans that are blowing
in her. It was an amazing experience. But I wanted
to be more. I wanted to be center. I wanted
(08:26):
to be further out so I can see the whole stage.
And I had a very specific idea of where I
wanted to sit. So that's why I bought that ticket. Okay,
it wastenchional. Also it was a damn good deal. It
was the front row of a floor section because I
don't like being on the floor because you got people's
big ass heads in front of you and you're all
on the same level. And even though I'm tall, I
(08:47):
knew people going to be wearing hats like we're doing
the most. I wanted to be front row. The morning
of the show, I got an email from stub Hub. Well,
first I got a phone call. I'm getting ready for church,
taking ready to church, And I got a phone call
and I was ignoring it because it was like an
eight seven seven number. And then I got the voicemail.
It was like, we're calling from stub Hub. The seller
(09:07):
has had issues, has had issues transferring your tickets. Maybe
they didn't have a ticket mmm mm hmm. I was
so confused. I'm like, what do you need my ticket?
I don't I already have it? No, woman, I didn't
already have the ticket. I was supposed to have it
transferred to me, but I was so used to just
(09:28):
buying a ticket and having it that I didn't like
read the email carefully when I got it. So I
was on the phone with stub Hub and they basically
said that that ticket was no longer available, which I
was in denial because how could it no longer be available?
I paid for it they and their system is that
they send you a link to alternative choices. So the
seller who was clearly some like ticket, you know, ticket,
(09:52):
not as I guess, a scalper galpar yeah, not a
scam per se because I was going to get a
ticket apparently, but a bait and switch happened. So clearly
he had sold my cut my ticket available and sold
it for a higher price the day of the show,
So it was no longer available to me, but he
(10:12):
was offering me and I'm saying he, They said he,
And I was like, how do you know who this
person is? They were on the phone with him apparently
on the other line, and he had I had a
couple of options from him available that were like they
were staged right bound off to the side on the floor,
but off to the side, and I'm like, no, I
wanted to this matters to me. I want to be
dead center. I want to see I want to see
(10:34):
everything from this viewpoint. And I was really upset and
I was kind of like disassociated from it because I'm
taking care of two babies at this point and got
my dad and I got my actual baby, and We're
trying to get to church and anything. And I was like,
you know what, I'm just gonna I'm gonna I'm going
to decline the alternative that he offered, and I'm going
to tell stub Hub exactly what I want. I was like,
(10:56):
I want to be center. I don't want anything else.
And then we went to church, and three hours later,
feah hours later, I oh gotta love church. Three hours later,
I had to claw my way out of that church
because you know, they had two people manning the door
to black people from leaving. I haven't meant to church
(11:17):
in a long time, let alone, like this is my
two people at the door. Oh sorry, sorry, no one
can leave. All pastors praying. I'm like pastor's been praying.
I mean no disrespect. First of all, I'm a heathen.
I haven't been a church in forever. But meanwhile, I
have my roots are in the Black Baptist Church. Like
I'm a Southern Baptist girl, and my aunt Brenda, my
(11:42):
uncle uncle Chrystley, Uncle Booby call him, they're both like
assistant pastors at this really, you know, humble, What other
way can I describe it? Humble? Classic Black Baptist church,
like in the heart of Atlanta, and you know, like,
is the ac gonna work today? We don't know. I
may or. I dressed light, I brought ice water. I
was like, I'm hydrating, Like I know, I pretty much
(12:05):
know what to expect, but I haven't actually been to
the church, despite trying for a while. So me and
Remy and I should have known better because my dad
was like, I'm dropping y'all off. I'm gonna go get
a haircut. I'll see y'all later. I was like, Daddy,
you don't want to come to church, like, may be
part of that right now. I'm like, nah, I'm good,
see y'all later. Bye. Ran for it. But it was
(12:29):
it was actually a really beautiful experience. But two and
a half hours in, I was about done. I felt bad.
My friend and I had to get up out of there.
I have a two year old, he's hungry. I'm hungry.
I got and I wasn't going to tell them because
I don't want to know. And I worshiped a fal
saddle Beyonce, but I was like, I have to go.
(12:52):
I had things to do. And they had two men
at the door. Yes. And at first I was like, oh, oh,
pastor's prying, okay, And this is after the sermon. People
are just going up for their blessing or whatever. And
I'm like, oh, okay, gotcha understood. And then I had
to sit down and talk to myself. I'm like, you're
a grown woman. They can't. They can to stay inside
(13:13):
this building, like for me can knock this door down.
It's a very small church. And I had to go
back and be like, I'm so sorry, I really need
to go. My rides outside and I escaped and it
was and I escaped before I got to I got
and I know my aunt, my aunt has been dying
for me to come and I and and I know
(13:35):
she wanted me to like meet all the meet her
past her, head past her. I know she wanted me
to meet her whole, like the whole whole community. And
I was like, I'm so sorry. Next time. Next time. Now,
I know, when Aunt Brenda tells you to come to
church at eleven, get there at twelve forty five, and
then if you spend two three and a half three
hours there, then you'll be there long enough to be
(13:56):
able to withstand the social interaction at the end. Because
I depleted, depleted, Yeah, it's way too much. Will you try?
You did it? Girl? I couldn't you been a better
person than me? Really not a church girl.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Okay, So I I grew up Muslim, but my dad
was the only Muslim person in the family, and so
everybody else, you know, was Christian, and so I am
very familiar with church, but that's never been my thing,
and so like to be able to sit through something
like that, I couldn't ever.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
Yeah, hey, ba fam, we're gonna take a quick break,
pay some bills, and we'll be right back. All right,
ba fam, We're back. I think only because I knew
half the people, and I mean it's a small trash
because the choir is like, oh, there's my cousin Tuki.
There's my cousin Ruby, There's my cousin Quita. Like it's
family and for me, I love that. Oh two Ki Yeah,
(14:53):
well her real name is Wandra putting all her business
out there. No one has a real name. Everyone's got
it's like Uncle Boo, I mean Uncle Kresley Kresley, Yeah,
and you know, but it was me getting to see
them in this element. It was for me, it felt
like I was watching a show, not to like not
to token eyes or to like diminish the how much
(15:14):
they love it and how how much it means to them.
But it was just really beautiful for me to be
in that environment and to see them do their thing.
I mean I never get to see my I mean,
my aunt brand is always trying to preach to me
on the phone. But it was cool. It was really
cool to see her in her bag, you know, in
the right context, not when I'm trying to like get
her off.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
The phone, get off the phone.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
And seeing my uncle Boo and like seeing the way
that the move the music was moving him. He's you know,
he's my older. These are my great uncles and they
are you know, they're older, they're getting on but he
got and he has a bad back, but he got up.
He was doing his little to his little two step.
The Holy Spirit was moving him. And you know, cousin
Tuki and and Brenda were they were singing, they're doing
(15:57):
and it was and then my cousin be her son
is like on the keys, and then two key and
then another. I forget. I got always cousins. I don't
know which cousin it was who was also on the keys.
Another cousin's doing the drums. It's I don't know. It
felt really, I'm not gonna lie. I got really emotional
during the service and after because I won. I'm coming
off my zoloft finally after five years, so we have withdrawals.
(16:21):
But two All week I had been like running and
anxious and like doing stuff and moving from here to
there with the kid and my dad and all that.
And I had not had any quiet reflection time. And
there was something really special about the like being in
that environment because it invites you. I'm not telling anyone
listening anything new, probably about church, like did you know
(16:41):
at church? Let me tell you something breaking what it
might be teaching me because I don't know, Well, it's
a quiet it's a quiet reflective I mean, full shit,
never mind it my that church was not quiet, but
it is a moment that invites reflection. Yeah, and the
minute I started to reflect on what I had been
going through that week and that day, And yes I
(17:03):
thought about Beyonce tickets during it, but I try not
to be too distract Yeah. Everything, and then and just
the fact that I hadn't been to church in so long,
and that I hadn't really gotten to embrace this part
of my heritage and so long. And I'm just thinking
about me as a baby going to churches like that.
I was so shy and every time my dad would
bring us to church, it would be like an event,
(17:23):
like they would like, talk about us, stand up now
in the back. Who you got back there, Amanda? And
I would be mortified. And I never felt comfortable in
that space. So I started reflecting about all that. And
I'm feeling very connected to Atlanta lately and Georgia and
so anyway, Yeah, I got in my fields. And when
(17:44):
I left church, I thought, this is when I let
go and let God. So when I leave church, they
will have figured out the Beyonce tickets, right, No, no, nothing,
nothing had changed, and I had I was like, either
going to have to fight it, like use more energy.
I have three or four hours, so I'm ready trying
to get to the show and like use that energy
(18:05):
to fight it and get the tickets that I really wanted.
But I was like, you know what, just give me stuff.
Hubba offered me floor tickets, but no longer front row
of the floor section. Now I was in the back.
Oh god. So I took the ticket. I'm like, fine,
I'm still gonna have a great time. I'll fight with
them tomorrow. And I went and I had me a
good ass time and it was so fun nice. I
(18:27):
put together a little fit. Okay, all the girls were
at the country Western stores. Let me tell you, we
had those Mexicans work in hard, very western stores. Like
it's Mexicans, Okay. When the rodeo alive? Right? Oh yeah,
oh for sure. And I'm sure there's another name for
I'm trying to think of the name. What do Mexicans
(18:49):
call the rodeo? Like what their gauchos whatever, that whole
Mexican cowboy thing like that. It's I guess it runs
deep in Georgia, which makes sense. We have a huge,
huge Mexican population in and around Atlanta. But I looked
up the closest country Western store. I was like, I'm
going to get some real authentic shit every time me
why every cowboy, Carter attendee, all the all the girls
(19:11):
had the same idea. We all got on Google, found
the same store and we bought the place out. They
were I mean like there were no boots left, the
hats where they were like those those girls were sweating
running around trying to get what we needed, like and
they were stressed. But tell me why Beyonce was blasting
on the speakers. I knew. I was like, we were
(19:32):
uplifting the local economy. This is amazing. Yes, And I
got a cute got a cute little bit, got some boots,
got a hat, had me as I loved that. Oh
my god. Wait, somehow we got on that whole tangent
when I was trying to ask you about your mini
retirement and I have no idea how, but I had
(19:56):
to get off my chest. So okay, so I went
to Beyonce to what what's your what's your? What is
the mini retirement update? How's it going?
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Is it?
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Has it started?
Speaker 2 (20:04):
So I am taking a break is gonna look a
little bit different. Yeah, I can't. Well, yeah, there's going
to be a break. And there's some stuff that I
have to do with my kids, Like I'm taking my
(20:25):
daughter next week to Columbia for a mommy daughter.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Retreat, which one than the eleven year old.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
Yeah, uh huh. It's like a coming up age like bonding.
You know, it's like the time where they start to
rebel and kind of pull away, but like my you know,
uh source to kind of like bring them back in
and give you the resources that you need to have
those conversations that are really hard to have or that
you never knew how to have because like I didn't
(20:53):
have a mom, so I didn't know how to have
those kinds. I don't know how to have those kinds.
M she left when I was five, and she was
around like I would go there like during holidays or whatever,
but she, you know, she wasn't a mom. You know
a lot of people, there's a lot of people that
don't really want to be moms, but they have kids
(21:16):
because but it's a whole different situations. Like Dad's like
you have you can you can parent, you can have kids,
but you don't know how to parent. It was like
one of those situations, so you know, all of this
stuff about parenting like like just kind of flying. But
you know, I'm just taking along. I believe me, Mandy,
(21:40):
I'm trying, but.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
A good mom. I'm not the best. I didn't say
you were the best and said you were such a
good mom. Yeah, I'm trying.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
I'm trying, like every day, like I'm trying so doing that,
just taking time, just being with the kids because they
need me. I can't get this time back and I
don't have a defined time, but I'm taking some time.
It just looks a little bit different. Like I really
(22:12):
wanted to take the kids to like Costa Rica and
like really explore and like do some world schooling, but
my daddy was like I can't do that, And I
was like fine because I'm not because he's really a
good cull parent and I'm not trying to mess up
the relationship up.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
So you know, I had to give a little bit. Oh,
I understand, you know, I that's really tough. It's even
being in Georgia with my two year old for a
week and having my husband up here. I like I
felt the type of way about him like it was weird.
(22:52):
I was like, I want to see when I was
trying to FaceTime my five year old and like he
wasn't like enriy Kue wasn't my husband wasn't available. Mind you,
we're still married, we're together. And I was like, what
do you mean You're keeping my son from me? You're
keeping my child, I my time, you know, and you
like even you know, even so I can't even imagine,
you know, if that was you know, our forever reality.
(23:16):
So I am sad because I think the last time
you were on the show, you really like, you know,
you had your ideal of what you wanted the many
retirement to look like. But that's some real, real shit. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
It was some like like come to Jesus, like listen,
like you can't move like that because that's not your reality.
And you know, I was like, okay, well it's not
gonna work out like I thought it would, because like
I thought, like I guess, I thought I had communicated
it better and I thought we had the conversation and
(23:46):
even if we did, like at that point, he wasn't
ready for that. And I was like, well, what do
you do? Like I can't sacrifice this relationship. He's worried
about putting a strain on a relationship with this kid,
with the kids, you know.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
So I'm just like, that's very fair, knowingly so, but okay, fine,
right right when they care to be involved, exactly, it's
double edged or it's like, you know, you want them
to be involved, but then they're involved and say you
have to deal with It's not a dictatorship, No, it's not. So.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
I mean, I think it's all gonna work out for
the good. Like it, everything always works out, So I
don't have any bad feelings about it. It just looks
different and it's not as like planned out as I
thought it would be by this point. But it's all
coming together. Everything is falling into place, and I'm just
excited for what's to come.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
I think that's a word. Especially as moms, we're so unfree.
It's so you know, how you try to have like, oh,
it's a beautiful day, it's a nice sunset, let's pack
the kids up and go to the park and just enjoy.
There's no such thing is a simple choice, you know,
even if you can plan for days and weeks and
then the reality of it, of the complications and the
(25:09):
people involved can quickly jerk you in a direction you
never wanted to be in or complicate everything, and so
I just I really appreciate you for sharing that, And
also I think it's a good just for anyone who's
thinking about the way that retirement will look for them,
or the way that their career will look for them,
(25:29):
and the vision that they have for you know, I
hear all the time, I'm gonna work really really hard
until I'm forty five, and then I'm gonna take you know,
then I'm gonna quit. I'm gonna go retire early, and
it's going to look a certain way. But life has
other plans sometimes. And does that mean that we're going
to give up the hope and the goal of getting
(25:50):
that time for rest and for like you said, like
you know, educating your girls globally and really exposing them
to a lot of the world and you know, to
teach all the learnings and teachings that you wanted to
give them. Like that can still happen. There's still time
for it, but maybe it's a week here, a couple
of months there, or whatever, you know, patched together. Yeah,
(26:12):
So what does that mean for you? Job wise? Are
you able to. I mean, you're a nurse, so you're
you have like forever job security in that sense.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Yeah, I'll be okay, Like, like the job is still
there for right now, it's just looks more like me
taking a break, but it's still it's still there. So
I'm trying to take it like in increments of what
that's going to look like, if like when I'm going
(26:42):
to go back, or how it's going to look when
I go back. You know, I still have other stuff
going on, like when you date to one that's across
the country from you. You know, all of that stuff
has a role to play, and like how I'm gonna move.
So I'm just taking my time, letting things kind of
play out and then I just know it'll work out
(27:04):
as it's supposed to be. But like I said, like
it's not as defined as I thought it would be
at this point, and that's okay because it's still is
still all good.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
It's still working out. We're still moving into rows. We're
obsessed with you. I want to I love the idea
of I mean, how beautiful is that to take? How
long You're going to be in Columbia with your eldest
for a week one week. Mm hmm. That's incredible. I
mean I wonder how many parents like this is what
(27:34):
the money is for in a way, like to do
a retreat like this. Yeah, especially like the way you said,
at a time when they're like she's becoming a little
preteen and all the changes and ugh, that's really really special.
And who hosts it is it's like a like is
it for mothers and daughters specifically?
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Yeah, it's it's a mommy and me retreat is specifically
for that. It's the girls have to be a certain
age to participate, like it's in the they have certain
ceremonies that they do, like it's all planned out, like
the retreat space is just for us.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Okay, yeah, it's.
Speaker 2 (28:16):
So I'm looking forward to it because it's like during
the time. Yeah, it's like during the time when you know,
you know, they're in they're they're in their preteen they're
tweens and or teenage years, and they're starting to pull
away and that relationship is starting to become afraid and
I'm starting to feel that. I started to feel that,
and I was just like I don't want that for us,
(28:38):
but you know, but not knowing how to navigate that
situation either it's kind of hard, so it's like right
on time.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
So I'm looking forward to it. So are these like
parenting like are they a therapists or pediatricians? Like what's
is it just not.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
You know what? Certification wise, I'm not a hundred percent sure,
but I know that they've been doing these retreats for
a while and have like some strong testimonies from it,
and so like, yeah, I'm not I'm not caught up
on like certifications and all that kind of stuff, but
I do go off of energy and vibes, and you know,
(29:18):
the energy is like where I needed to be and
what I need, the space that I need my daughter
to be in.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
So as someone who has zero certifications police, I am
not all looking to judge or even like I don't
think that's even what matters. I think the testimonies, like
you said, is amazing. I'm just really curious.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
You know.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
Yeah, beautiful, that's a beautiful like business to have. Costa Rica. Well,
I hope you guys have the best thing. Colombia. Colombia. Oh, Colombia,
that's right, Colombia. Confused, Oh, I hope you're the best
time ever. Even though I missed my five year old
so much. It was nice because two year old Remy
(29:58):
as a daddy's boy and a boy. I mean, if
Daddy's around Mommy gets the he will shove me in
my face to get me out of the way. I'm
not getting I'm like yeah, And that's why I decided
to take him. I could have taken either, you know.
The idea was just you know, I'll take one, and
I was like, no, let's let's recalibrate a little bit.
(30:18):
Daddy and Rion need to have some time Mommy and
the baby. I need to remind this. I need to
remind him who he you know, like who actually burst
him into this world? Right, Like, yeah, he gave me
a run for my money, honey, he is in the town.
He was bad.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
Oh bit god, Oh mine too. And she is very
vocal too, and.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
So much more vocal than big brother was. Big Brother
had a speech to lay till about three thirty three
and a half three thirty three and a half, and meanwhile,
Remy is like, he will tell you exactly. He sings songs,
he repeats everything I say, and he tells me everything
he wants and doesn't want. And it's like.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
Telling you that they went poop again in their diaper
instead of being the toilet.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
I want to take a quick break and I want
to come back. We got some buzzworthy to talk about.
We're going to do brown Boost Brown Break. I also
want to tell BA Fam about our book club pick
and how you can join our first author speaker series
for the BA book Club. So stick around, BA Fam.
We're going to be right back and again. I'm joined
by Nasima McElroy financially intentional da back all right, va Fam,
(31:31):
I'm back. Nasima had to go because she is a
busy woman. So I am here writing solo for one
of the best parts of my week, which is getting
an opportunity to reflect and either take a brown boost
or a brown break. Now I done told y'all every
it Well, Actually no, I haven't, because I could have
talked for hours and hours more about the Beyonce Show
(31:52):
Atlanta Night three. Baby, we really did it. Like Beyonce,
we are her faves. She loves Atlanta. She said we
were best dressed. It was incredible. Not only did I
have an incredible time of the show. After the show,
I'm walking, I'm just like flying. I'm like Hi on
the vibes of the Beyonce concert. Also, I might actually
have been high because the number of people who were
(32:13):
toking up in my row, like in the floor seats,
the contact high it could have been. It might have
been Beyonce. It could have been the fact that jay
Z was a surprise guest on night three. It could
have been the Cutwater Margarita that I had waiting in
line before I got to the show. Like who knows,
But I was feeling good after the show, and I'm
(32:35):
standing on the street corner outside of Mercedes Benz Arena
and they have all these streets blocked off. It's everyone's
kind of like, kind of milling about. No one knows
where the hell we are, even though a lot of
us are from Atlanta. I'm like, why is this city
so damn confusing? Where are the street signs? Where are
they all crooked? Damn? But I'm standing there trying to
figure out where I'm going to meet? My dad is
picking me up and tell me why. I hear screams
(32:58):
and I look to my left and I see this
black suv and the most gorgeous face and the most
gorgeous face. Can I say that again? The most gorgeous
face I'll ever see in the window, like eight inches
of window is cracked down, and I see Beyonce and
she is there. She is smiling, she's waving, and Julius
(33:18):
is in the front seat, and she turns the corner.
I'm right here. I'm around the corner. She turns the corner.
I run around a park car because I'm like, oh,
I'm gonna get to wave to Beyonce. She's right there.
I run around the park car. By the time I
get there and she crosses my path, her window is
going it's pretty much up and Julius. Julius is like
hanging out the window, mean mugging. He is like looking
(33:40):
at that crowd, like I wish yall would try to
run up on this suv right now. I just know
he was scary. But I waved, and I'm just hoping.
I know she had the window up. It was tinted
within an inch of its life. But I hope she
saw me waving. I hope she saw the outfit that
I was wearing. I worked really hard on my fit.
I was joking that I try to look sexy and
like wear the black on black. A lot of the
(34:02):
girls were wearing the black on black, you know, cowboy
hat and the black outfit. But I just I'm wearing
a black two shirt right now, and I really don't
want to be I'm not gonna lie. I don't have
any clean clothes after coming home from Georgia, but I don't.
It just doesn't give me life. I wanted sparkle, I
want it pink. So that's the vibe I went with.
And I really tried to put my all into my outfit,
and it was so gratifying that just to know that
(34:24):
maybe Beyonce saw it. But then I wasn't even able
to be too disappointed. After her, she passed by and
her window was up because the next suv rolled by,
and the second most beautiful face in the world, Blue
Ivy Carter, is in the window and she's waving, and
right behind her is baby's sis Roomy. I just, matter
of fact, by the way, they have their own suv,
(34:44):
so I know Jay was in the suv with Beyonce then,
which means maybe Ja, but Jay was probably not even looking.
But Beyonce rolls by then Blue Ivy and Roomy and
then they passed by, and then who is it? Number three?
Mama Tina, Mama. I don't know who she was riding with,
but Mama Tina had her phone out and she was recording.
(35:06):
And when she passed by me, I was like, Mama Tina,
and I swear we made eye contact, and I was like,
she's recording. I wonder if she's gonna upload it, then
tell me why. I get on IG the next morning
and the first thing I see is Mama Tina uploaded
that video and there I am, my happy ass on
the street corner, waving like a fool. Martina's just so amazing.
(35:26):
And I'm just saying, Beyonce and the Carter family, Y'll
owe me absolutely nothing. I spent seven hundred hard earned
dollars on that show, and I would spend it again.
Not to mention what I spent in London doesn't even matter.
Maybe my brown boosh is just gonna be. This is
what the money is for. Find you in experience like
the one that Find you in experience that brings you
(35:47):
as much joy as Beyonce's shows do for me, and
then do everything you can to experience listings again. So
if that's a sporting event, if it's going the US Open,
the Super Bowl, like, I don't know what are y'all
into out there. If whatever that thing is that lights
you up, that becomes your reason why. It becomes so
(36:10):
much easier to say no to everything else that could
distract you from your goals financially when you know what
you were striving for. And for me, it's like okay, kids, health, family,
and then Beyonce tickets, like that's the north start for
me forever and always. All right, but let me do
a real bron boot brown break. I'm gonna do a
break for let me look this up really quick because
(36:33):
dad da dada, Oh right, fine, I'm like Black women's
equal paydays last week was last week, and I know
everybody wants me to be depressed about it and talk
about how black women have to work an extra seventy
eleven hundred days in order to earn what a mediocre
white man earns. But like I said on Instagram, like
(36:53):
I'm really not too pressed. I don't want to spend
too much time covering headlines like that because Okay, it's
important to know that that's still happening, but also like
it's irrelevant to us, like ba fam, it's irrelevant to us.
You're listening to the show, you're listening to me, You're
getting your career, getting your negotiation advice, you're getting your
money together. It's almost too relevant to us what the
(37:14):
norm is for women of color because we're not the norm. Like,
we're here gathering in this space that Brown Ambition has
offered us and created for us. And why I made
this space for us, you know, ten years ago with Tiffany,
is because we are here to help ourselves and you
become exceptions to the rule. So although statistics like this
very much exist, and I know women of color, like
(37:36):
I know that we are out here and we are struggling.
And if you're a black woman, you're earning something like
fifty something cents to the dollar of a white person,
a white male, And if you're a Latina it's even
less than that, is it fifty cents? I know that
if you're a black woman you're earning something like sixty
cents or seventy cents to the dollar of a white man.
(37:56):
If you're a Latina, it's even worse. Listen, I know
that at the same time, we are here to create
exceptions to those rules. We are not here to internalize
data points like that. In fact, almost to a certain extent,
I wish we would stop giving them as much press
as we do. I want people in decision making positions,
(38:16):
you know, at businesses and on Capitol Hill. I want
them to understand the pay inequality gap. I want them
to understand that black and brown women are chronically underpaid
compared to our white counterparts. It's important for y'all to
understand that it's not important for me to dwell on that.
It's not important for you and me to dwell on that,
and to steep and stew in that feeling that I
(38:38):
think a capitalistic society really benefits from us feeling, which
is as if this is the only path for us,
this is the only outcome. That because the average is
such and such, then we have to expect that or
even less, or if we get a little bit above
that average or even hit that average, that we should
be grateful because this is the average for everyone. So well,
(38:58):
we got here, so I guess we're doing okay. Unfortunately,
you're listening to brown ambition and the ambitious part of
our nature. The reason why we created this show when
we did ten years ago is because we are embracing
the fact that the status quo, the norm, does not
have to be our reality, and that it is okay.
(39:19):
It is safe even and I want to say that
it is safe for us to expect more from ourselves.
It is safe, and it is possible for us to
expect more for ourselves and for us to create the
exceptions to the damn rules. So thank you BA Fan
for listening to this week's episode of Brown Ambition, Thanks
for listening to the Brown Table. Thanks for giving me
(39:39):
this platform. I could not do it without you, and
I want to hear from you. You can leave me
a comment, you can leave me a review. You can
also just email me directly. I'm at Brown Ambition Podcast
on Instagram. You can also email me Brown Ambition Podcast
at gmail dot com. You can join our Patreon don't
forget Patreon. You can join as an unpaid member and
I'll drop in some previews of upcoming shows and I'll
(40:02):
talk to y'all in the little chat. But oh, you
can also join the book club. Brian Ambishon has a
book club. John know that. And our first pick of
the summer was this little gem right here, got it
right here Cibo Campbell Sky Full of Elephants, Meanwhile, this
is the most overdue library book in the in the
history of man. Okay, it's not that overdue. I got
(40:24):
to get the real hard copy though. But we're reading
Sky Full of Elephants by Cebo Campbell. And if you're
in the Patreon, you don't have to be a paid
member to join the book club. Anybody can join the
book club, but do join the patreon because when I
have Cebo, he's coming to the book club in the
next week or two. So you have to be in
the patreon if you want to get a free invite
(40:44):
and a free ticket to that author series, author Q
and a that I'm going to do with Cibo himself.
I can't wait to talk about this book. If you
haven't read yet, there's still time y'all can catch up.
So go to patreon, dot co dot com, lash Brown Ambition,
check the show notes. It's in there somewhere. You can
join the Patreon and then please join us when we
(41:06):
bring Sebo into the patreons, we can have a little
chit chat. But his incredible novel and what comes next?
All right, ba fam, I am Mandy Money. I'm gonna
leave it there. Continue to have a wonderful summer. Thank
you again for all the support for the show, sending
all lots of love. Bye okay Va fam. Thank you
(41:27):
so much for listening to this week's show. I want
to shout out to our production team, Courtney, our editor, Carla,
our fearless leader for idea to launch productions. I want
to shout out my assistant Lauda Escalante and Cameron McNair
for helping me put the show together. It is not
a one person project, as much as I have tried
(41:49):
to make it so these past ten years. I need help, y'all,
and thank goodness I've been able to put this team
around me to support me on this journey and to
y'all bea fam. I love you so so so so much.
Please rate, review, subscribe, make sure your sign up to
the newsletter to get all the latest updates on upcoming episodes,
our tenth year anniversary celebrations to come, and until next time,
(42:14):
talk to you soon via buye