August 25, 2021 • 49 mins
Okay, not hippopotamus with insomnia, but we are talking 1. people who die from lack of sleep and 2. the dangerous yet cutie patootie hippo. Wow!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:08):
School of Humans. Hello, welcome to another episode of Cadaver Gals,
where we talk about the ways people have died throughout
history to cope with our own fragile mortality. I'm your host, Nika,
along with Gabby Hello, oh and Taylor Hi, hi e e.
(00:29):
This is our first show that we've recorded in like
two weeks, so we might be a little rusty. We'll
have to see. So on today's show, we're going to
be covering some light subjects. But here's a trigger warning. Um,
death of a child and animal maaling and diabetes in insomnia.
So if any of those you're like, I don't I
don't do well with that. Um, you know, skip skip
(00:51):
the episode. You are not missing out on anything. Bananas.
To be fair, actually there's some ancient Egyptians we don't
know that. Yeah, talking abouts it could be bananas. Oh
whoa some secrets and oh. On today's show, we're gonna
be covering the dangers of being speepy, which is sleepy,
and why you should stay at a respectful distance from
(01:12):
hippo's lest you get pregnant. That makes sense. Later, que
Illi get her music. So Taylor, I only slept four
(01:36):
hours last night and I would love to hear how
that might kill me? Do you want to go first? Sure?
Oh no, Naka's dead. I'm literally dead. I went to
sleep at like one ish and woke up at five
to take my brother at the airport. Brothers are canceled.
Brothers are canceled. Yes, So I don't know about how
(01:57):
y'all find your your cases, but I try and find
things that are relevant to my life to scare myself more,
I guess, but like something that I see or experience,
And right now I am so tired. I'm so tired.
I feel like I could die. I feel like that
is like a feeling. This feels like it's going to
be connected to your story. Yeah. Well, people get angry,
(02:19):
and I am the one. I'm the type of person
that gets like sleep angry, Like if I cannot find
a place to sleep when I'm tired, or if I
can't go to sleep for some reason, I get so mean.
Oh I become a different person. I literally I think
last night I was like hitting myself on the head
because I just was like, I need to go to bed,
I knock myself out. I need to do something, and
I was out of weed. So yeah, it's just like
(02:40):
I get so mean. Well, anyway, there's this one perfect Okay, Gabby,
I actually know for a fact that you suffer from
severe insomnia. Yeah, but I'm also perfect in spite of myself. Yeah, okay,
therapist work. So there's this one fella who took it
a little too far. In twenty twelve, there was this
(03:03):
Chinese man. His name was not disclosed to protect him,
so I don't know what his name was, but anyway,
he was quite the soccer enthusiast and he was determined
to watch all of the Eurosoccer Tournament in twenty twelve.
He wanted to see every single game. He was a
huge fan of France and England. But still he was like,
(03:25):
I still need to see how everything else goes while
he's in China, remember, and the time zone thing became
quite a problem. So basically what he would end up
doing is he'd go to work and then he'd stay
up through the night to watch all of the games,
go straight up to work and did this for eleven nights. No,
that's a long time. It's a very long This is
(03:47):
why sports are a danger. Yeah, and gaming because a
lot of gamers I feel like that happens to gamers too.
They just like stay up. Oh my gosh, it's so relatable.
I used to do that with Sims all the time. Sims, Yeah,
I'm a gamer, guys. Is that count Yeah? I guess
reely not. But whatever. Well anyway, so eleven nights followed
(04:10):
by a full day of work. I don't really know
what he did for a living, but when he would
watch the games, he'd drink with friends, he'd smoke a little.
And on June nineteenth, he watched Italy beat Ireland two oh,
headed home to shower, got it. He was like, you know,
it's time to get a good night's sleep, do it
all again, Except for this night, he did not wake
(04:31):
back up. He died from exhaustion of staying up for
eleven nights. The alcohol and smoking, for sure didn't help,
but that was not the cause. It was ultimately the
lack of sleep that got him. And like the exhaustion
from like just go go, go, go go. What was
the exact like cause of death. Was it just exhaustion
or was it like heart failure or was it it
(04:53):
was exhaustion? Thing just like like his body, just like
his body was just like I'm done that's just you
have to reset. So interestingly set into a new life. Wow,
he rapped, he rebooted into a new life. Yeah, so interestingly. Actually,
there was this high school teenager in nineteen sixty four
and he was like trying to conduct his own study,
(05:15):
which like in high school, like that's really intense, Like
I'm going to do with study. I was not that ambitious,
but he wanted to see what the effects of like
no sleep would have on a person. And he too
made it to eleven days. He didn't die, but he
suffered a great deal of side effects. He had hallucinations
and loss of muscle control, short term memory loss. He
(05:36):
actually so they were like, you know, he was like
doing all these things, like trying to see like what
he could and couldn't do with like this lack of sleep.
And he was like they're like, okay, can you count
backwards from one hundred? And he would like get through
a few numbers and then just totally forget what he
was doing, like it's that bad. And then at one point,
which this is kind of silly to me, he was
convinced that he was a professional football player and would
(05:59):
like argue with anyone and like get into a fight
with people if they like said, like, no, you're not,
You're just like a high soul student. He was like
losing his sanity. He was losing that's so dangerous mind.
But um, so, I think I think he was also
trying to get like a Guinness Book of World Records.
But like they don't they don't recognize recognize dangerous things
(06:20):
like that anymore, which is kind of weird. I mean,
everything seems dangerous in the Guiness Book World Records. Well, yeah,
that's true, but very extra. There's the Greate challenge right now.
So I feel like, you know, so dumb dangers still
be dangers. Can you tell um listeners what the great
challenges for those who are not on Twitter? I was, okay,
(06:40):
I was out of town. I came back and I
was like, what is going on with these people flying
off of creates? What is happening? Yes, it's like people
are stacking creates like a pyramid, and then you so
it'll be like starting with like one to two to
three to four to five to six to multiple you know,
stacked on top of each other, and the challenges to
walk across them. And so obviously as the taller they
are the more unstable they are, so the more likely
(07:03):
you're going to fall. And they most people see in
the videos, I've seen a lot of people do be
fallen and it looks very painful. So yeah, but I
guess the Guestbook of World Records isn't gonna isn't gonna
acknowledge the tallest crates. So you, guys, if that's what
you're going for, which I don't think. I think literally
it's just tomfoolery and debauchery and the world is the
world is also losing its mind milk. That is true.
(07:27):
Maybe the world needs more sleep. But what I will
say about the milk crate challenge is crates were really dangerous. Okay,
my friend who will be unnamed, and I will not
give any details other than this, they woke up at
night and accidentally like fell on a bunch of crates
and really really damaged their organ they're what they're under
(07:51):
organ oh oh, the genderless genital organ. Yeah, and it
was like really really bad all from like falling on
some crates. So wow, I mean, don't sleep by crates.
Semple fix obviously, I know, I know. Back to the
(08:11):
whole sleep thing. The good news so so against book
World Records, is like that's too dangerous. We're not going
to do stuff that like can like really kill you
like that. But this kid was like after eleven days,
he got fourteen hours of sleep and was like fully recovered.
So like, okay, this guy was fine, but like eleven
days was kind of that's it's just ironic or something
(08:34):
that it was eleven days for both of them. Yeah,
But also this guy was sixteen and maybe he wasn't
doing alcohol and smoking, so that's true. The other guy
was I think twenty six and whatnot whatever it was
that he was doing. But um, but anyway, so smart.
So there was this one comparison that I read throughout
the day. Your brain is just like getting dirty and
(08:56):
like toxic, and and the more that you're awake and
the more that you're like thinking and whatever, you're basically
dirtying up your brain. And sleep is like a way
of washing your brain to clean it up. Which, honestly,
it seems like a very good comparison because to me,
there's nothing like better than a good night's sleep. But
here's the thing, like we not cadaver, we but like
(09:19):
the scientists, we don't really know much about like why
do we sleep? We spend like a third of our
lives in this weird state of pause. But then we
don't really know like why. I mean, we know that
it makes us feel better and it energizes and restores us,
but like why, like evolutionarily speaking, like the why for that,
we just don't really know evolutionary speaking, it doesn't make
(09:40):
sense because if like you close your eyes to sleep
and rest and you're not aware, and then predators will
get you, you know, exactly. So there's a few theories,
right because it just seems like you're you're just a
very vulnerable state. But there's a few theories. Um, like
Harvard did some some study, some science, they did studience,
(10:00):
you know, Harvard sit Harvard exactly. But one is basically inactivity.
You're not moving, you're not alerting predators. Second is like energy,
which you know, that makes sense. I'm just so sort
of still, except for I move a lot when I sleep,
so that that doesn't work. Oh I don't I sleep
like a ballerina? Yeah you do, don't you have your
(10:23):
my little up Nika sleeps with like she lays on
her back. She's got her silk pillow, she's got her
lavender spray. She's got like one knee up, but she's
just like a pirouette. Yeah. Position and hands are like
resting on my tummy. You are just it's not really graceful.
(10:43):
Mine is the eye sleep of the exact opposite. I'm
a gremlin in the cave. Yeah, I love my little gremlins.
So the second the second theory is that it's for
energy conservation. So like at a time when there was
not a lot of food available, you needed to conserve
the energy that the food gives you by resting, so
you have the energy to basically go out and find
(11:05):
more food. And then another theory is that sleep is
just restorative and the body like is literally just like
repairing itself. Like back to that comparison earlier about like
your brain is just being like dirtied up throughout the day,
especially Nika's Oh, Nika's Nika's mind so dirty. All Yeah,
(11:25):
someone complimented my stand up recently saying I was nasty,
So you are nasty, Gabby. The amount of anal jokes,
I mean, oh my goodness. But the thing is, I
love them. It's funny. Change it is funny. And so
the last theory is brain plasticity theory where your brain
is literally building and creating memories and learning, which okay,
(11:45):
I actually have my own theory. So I was living
to say, cada pals give us a theory like like
as a joke, but clearly you know I got one,
and this isn't really a joke. So okay, when my
sister had just had her baby, she was very tired, right,
like obviously, like you have you have just done a
very intense thing. Your body has undergone an insane amount
(12:07):
of like stress and trauma and so like some like
around this time, I was watching TV and there was
like this story about how like the reason you forget
when you drink too much is because sleep is what
stores your memories, and so if you drink too much,
you're not getting that deep rim the right kind of sleep,
so your brain is just not making those memories. Therefore
(12:30):
you forget. Okay, So I think the same thing with kids.
So this probably is going to be very controversial, but
like so as rat torture, so whatever, why people don't
actually care about children, It's just about animals, right right right,
So okay, you're so tired when you have a kid
that you forget how hard it is to have a newborn,
Like you're just you're not making that memory of like, wow,
(12:52):
that was really hard, Like I don't ever want to
Like I imagine there are times I don't have a child, obviously,
but I imagine there are times where you're like, this
is too hard. I don't ever want to do this again.
You know. Wow, that's actually true though, because I was
talking to my friends. My friend was talking about her
sister who has had children, and she's like she would
pop another one out, like if she could right now,
(13:14):
and because she literally doesn't remember how like difficult it
was at the start, and then she just is like, oh,
I want another one, and then go through the entire
cycle again exactly. So you're so sleep deprived that you
forget how hard it is, Like I swear to God,
every like there no one would have more than one
child if they actually got the proper amount of sleep
and remembered, if they could like really take it in. Yeah,
(13:36):
So that's my that's my weird theory about how no
one would have multiple children if you actually were able
to sleep. So I'm just playing women are dumb, um. Well,
I love a good theory. Taylor You're welcome. Yes, But
(13:57):
so I'm gonna I'm gonna flip it a little bit
because I did come across this condition called fatal familial
insomnia or FI, which is basically it's this condition where
people literally just stop sleeping. It's not insomnia or like,
it's just literally or like, you know, just getting distracted
and so you don't fall asleep. It's literally their body
(14:17):
is just like they're just not going to sleep. And
it's the super rare genetic condition where the body is
just like, Nope, no more sleep, I don't do it anymore.
It's so rare that there's only twenty eight families that
have this genetic mutation. Keep them away from me. I
love my sleep. I'm not reproducing with any of those
people in those families, I know. So they're it's fine,
(14:40):
well they basically by fifty yes. But what happens is
is there's this protein that mutates and it makes the
proteins in your brain fold in all these weird ways
and makes these holes in your brain, which is kind
of similar to mad cow disease apparently. But basically what
happens once you're diagnosed, like you will die within the
year and the symptom. Yeah, it's crazy. Oh my gosh.
(15:04):
The symptom are really weird and kind of jarring. They're
just kind of like random, like one day you're kind
of good and then the next you're like, Okay, my
pupils are really small, I'm sweating a lot. My speech
is really weird, memory problems, muscle weakness, involuntary muscle spasms,
kind of like Parkinson's fever, rapid heart rate, high blood pressure,
(15:25):
increased production of tears. Oh my gosh. Yeah. So basically
it's like your body just like falls apart and there's
no treatment like right now. But like I said, it's
super rare and it's genetic. So the odds are there's
only twenty eight families out there that we know of
the habit. They can't they can't like, um, put you
(15:49):
down for no, like put you down for eight hours,
so your body is forced to rest. No, That's what
I'm saying, is your body your brain, like there's something
whatever the protein and your brain does it. Like you
just you don't sleep. You can't do it. It's impossible,
Like I don't even I mean I don't. That's interesting
if you like you're saying like if they put you
(16:11):
on our anesthesia. Yes, yeah, I don't know. I don't
I have no idea. I kind of feel like noum
based on your scientific conclusion. It's like the proteins are
stronger than melatonin, which is easy to do. Honestly, Melotone
is kind of like a pussy drug for like insomniacs. Honestly,
what's your favorite insomnia drug, Gabby? Or is it like
(16:33):
to talk about I started taking melatonein guys. It is great.
I love well. I do take melotone, but I think
they don't know how long you should. You shouldn't take
it as long as I've been taking it. But not
to brag I'm crazy, um, but I used to take
Ambien in college when I was really bad. And let
me tell you, Ambien is so lit because I would
(16:54):
take it and I would stay awake to see like
how long I could stay awake, and I would just
like I would hallucinate. It was pretty fun. That is
so dangerous exactly, Like you have to have sleep, like
we don't know, we don't necessarily know why, but we
know that, like you just have to have sleep like
the most that you can. Like Okay, So I have
this book and I was reading it, m bragging you
(17:16):
read I read a book and too. Yeah, it's called
what really Happens if you get swallowed by a whale
or shot from a cannon or go barreling over dagra
and then you're dead. Yeah. So basically they were like,
if you have the option to sleep or um, what
(17:42):
was it? Why is my brain not processing this? Basically? Yeah, exactly.
Basically it's it says like, if you choose choose, can
choose hunger over sleep deprivation, choose to be hungry, like,
always go to sleep instead because it's less it's it
is a less painful I mean dinner, so it's all miserable. Um.
(18:07):
But my last theory that I will leave you guys with,
which this is something that I very strongly believe in,
is invest in your bed. Okay, here's what. Nika's rolling
her eyes because she's heard me say this. I have,
but also, honestly, I want to steal the covers that
are behind you. I think the collar is so pretty.
And I sleep sometimes I get drunk at Taylor's house
(18:30):
and I stay the night and I stay in her
guest bedroom and it's like this beautiful emerald green bed
and the duvet is fluffy at the pillows are fluffy,
and I wake up so well rested, and she usually
has waffles in the morning. M cadaver Gals is sponsored
by Mattress Firm. Invest in your match. Go to Mattress
form where they have one employee, but there's like twelve
(18:51):
stores next to each other. Are serious, okay, are you ready?
So if you invest in your bed, you need to
have like good sheets, good mattress, good everything, as much
as you know, take the best that you can get,
because if you have a bad night's sleep, you're gonna
have a bad day. You have a bad day, you
go to work, maybe you get fired, you get fired,
(19:12):
you have no money. You have no money, you can't
buy anything. And you can't buy anything. Then that's a
you know, and you can't get a good bad capitalism
okay anyway, and then you die and then die if
you don't want you can't have the things like it'll
literally ruin your life if you have a bad night's sleep.
I'm very convinced of it, Taylor. The stakes are so high, now, yeah,
(19:34):
the stakes are insane. I'm really nervous now, well, you know,
thank you, Taylor, thank you for that. Thank you. Everybody
got to take a nap. Yeah, I'm I want to
stop this right now to go take a nap, but
I won't. Um when we come back, you know, more
sleep talk, Oh more pillow talk, but not in a
sexy way, unless you think death is sexy, right, welcome back?
(19:58):
You know that? As people would say, Um, I don't
know whe that came from, Gabby. I have a question
before we dive into my tangent. What was the weirdest
hallucination that you saw when you were on Ambient? Oh okay,
so I would like hallucinate feelings, so I would like
I felt. I was convinced whenever I would take Ambient,
I was convinced that I had these like guardian angels.
(20:20):
But what they were was that they were fairies and
they had they were like autumnal themed fairies. So they
had like like leaves, like fall leaves, like as wings,
and I didn't I never saw them, but I knew
they were there. Oh my gosh, okay, wait, we believe
in the Faye on this podcast. We believe in them,
So that's amazing. Wow. I thought it was gonna be
(20:43):
creepy because you usually are creepy, but now it was
my autumnal themed fairies that looked over me. I'm gonna cry.
Oh okay, But also I was probably taking too much
sleep medication, so I wouldn't say it's cute. Do you
still think they're with you? Um? I know I forgot
(21:03):
about them because, you know, I realized that I didn't
need to be as stressed out all the time. By that,
I mean I still am, but in a different way,
but in a way that I sleep a little bit
more now. So I don't think about the autumnal themed fairies,
but I do like to think that I like being
reminded that they're there, you know, I remind you so sweet? Yeah,
(21:24):
I love this. Okay, well, thank you for that. So
obviously we've learned the dangers of not letting your peepers rest.
That is scary stuff. I am scared for myself right
now because my eyes are lit to really closing. But
if you are like me and you enjoy sleep, you
enjoy a nap, you enjoy closing your eyes and just
taking a fucking break from the world, or like sometimes
(21:45):
I do the same with glasses. If I'm wearing glasses
and I just have seen enough. I'll just take them off. Yeah, literally,
are you in danger too? Like is that bad for you?
The answer is yes. So, according to asshole researchers, if
you sleep more than hours a night, you are probably
depressed and poor. I'm not kidding. They literally are like
(22:07):
depression and low socioeconomic status, and I feel personally attacked.
And the idea from that, you know, mean theory is
that people who maybe don't have access to healthcare. Hey,
who's uninsured raise your hand? Or who maybe they just
don't get like routine checkups, they seem to have more
undiagnosed illnesses and then they try to like just you know,
(22:29):
quote unquote sleep it off, which I really hate how
like strongly this is hitting me. And then obviously depressed
people have less energy slash motivation, which causes them to
sleep more. Obviously, so those are like two things that
oversleeping can lead to. Slash might be the cause of
hate to say it, researchers are probably right. And they
(22:49):
also found out that oversleeping constantly, usually from like a
medical situation, could actually lead to type two diabetes by
making your body more insulin resistant. Like what the heck,
I'm mad. Also, more than nine hours a night is
like not insane. I like to get like eight to
nine hours. So like, am I gonna die? Well, we're
(23:10):
all gonna die at the end, but in the end,
in the end, we're all gonna die. Also, we'll be
well rusted, right, I mean yeah. When people be like
you sleep when you're dead, I'm like, fuck off, bitch,
Like I don't want my life to be bad by
being tired. It's true. It's true. Like people who go
on like benders. I'm just like, listen, when I'm at
(23:33):
the club, one am rolls around, twelve am rolls around,
and I'm like, um, it's been real nice. The happy
hour drinks are over, Like I got in for free
because I came out at ten, Like I'm ready to go,
you know, It's just I'm ready to wrap it up.
I'm ready to be in bed anyway. Yeah, I'll still
go to the club here, we're big club club gang.
(23:53):
I'm like, ten o'clock rolls around, where's my melotonin? I
love it, Gosh, I love a ten o'clock bedtime. Okay,
that's actually my plan tonight to go to bed at ten. Also,
oversleeping could make you more likely to be obese. And
then because you're more likely to be obese, apparently, it
could make you more likely to suffer from heart disease. Literally,
(24:16):
it's insane, okay, And there's and there's more. There's more. Apparently,
in twenty nineteen, people who reported that they were sleeping
nine hours or more per night, we're twenty three percent
more likely to suffer from a stroke. We I can't win,
I cannot win. But those are just people sleeping in
twenty nineteen. It's a different year. It's a different situation.
(24:37):
You're gonna die of a lot of other things. Now,
there's so many, so many more reasons to die. Um
also ways, you don't know what I meant? Okay, I
have I have just one more. And this one is
like a little bit of a stretch. I mean in
my brain, I'm like, are these male research ours? But
(25:01):
apparent what are you about? Get ready? Get ready for this?
Get ready. Researchers believe that when the circadian rhythm is disrupted,
which is the sleep rhythm or the sleep cycle, women's
internal clock, which is the one that has to do
with fertility and opulation and all that yummy stuff, is
also disrupted. So causing basically infertility. Oh women crazy, yes,
(25:27):
but like I feel like they could use this for
oversleep or for undersleep, like this is all a stretch
and then um yeah, and then the last one is
apparently oversleeping has also been linked to the classic big bad,
which is death. M Um, just yeah, I still, I
just this conversation makes me want to take a nap.
(25:48):
I know that that's not how that I should be reacting.
I should be like, oh, I should go be active.
So boring. No, hey, okay, Gabby, do you have something better? Well,
you better because your story, well, Nica, I guess I
will do my story now if that's all right with you, Um,
that would be fine with me. I think I can
(26:10):
approve that. Yeah. Great. Um. It's going to be mostly
a series of fun facts, and starting with the funnest fact,
which is, um, actually this is not fun at all
what I'm about to say. But in twenty fourteen, we're
in Niger, Africa, okay, and there is a boat of
twelve school children ages twelve, thirteen, fourteen, and they were
(26:32):
on a little river tour and all of a sudden
their boat on the river was attacked and then it
was capsized and they all died or literally what kind
of door are you doing? Like, yeah, what is happening
any more? The end? The end? Okay, no, well, so
(26:53):
what happened was that they were attacked by a hippo
and a hippo capsized their boat and then they either
drowned or also got attacked by the hippo and the
hippo done bit them. So is that a terrible story?
It's terro it's very sad, and it's actually the crazy. Okay,
So hippos, Okay, I'm sorry I'm saying this so cavalierly,
(27:15):
but there was also not as much detail about the stories,
just like this terrible thing happened, and then it's like,
oh shit, yeah that is terrible. But you know, hippos
are you know, one of the most dangerous animals out there.
They you know, they say anywhere from like five hundred
to three thousand people die every year from a hippo attack.
And even it's crazy how COVID has actually increased hippo
(27:39):
attacks and certain parts of Africa for example, So basically
with COVID, like there's this one place in Kenya where
a lot of the money that they make is by
farming and exporting flowers, and because of COVID it's usually
the Europe A lot of Europeans, you know, weren't buying flowers,
so they lost a lot of the money. But they
usually make off of sending exporting products to Europe. So
(28:01):
what ended up happening is a lot more people had
to you know, become fishermen or you know, to actually
had to fish to just stay in their families instead
of just like buying food and so. But also maybe
because of climate change, but also just because of like
um weather patterns. There's this one like that then became
over flooded more like more water than usual, So there's
more hippos. And then also they were fishing. There's just
(28:23):
more people fishing, and then the hippos. Hippos are very territorial,
so with more people fishing, there's more people who have
been attacked and killed by hippos because of COVID. Wow,
and climate change a little bit unintended consequences. Yeah, so
of eating a bat, of eating a bad bad boy. Um, anyway,
(28:47):
it was God, it was good. But I'm mad because
hippos are so cute, you know. I well, Western media
would have you believe that they're so cute just because
they look like they basically look like they're made out
of bubbles. You know, they just are like wrote ton
and then there's like fucking Fantasia. We all saw those
(29:09):
hippos that were ballerinas and we were like, We're like, wow,
look at those big ladies getting in looking good. I
thought that hippos were pink and they're not another like
gray baby baby hippos. That's my that's my um. Adding
(29:29):
to the conversation, I just love them. They're so cute.
It's so frustrating. Yeah, and they're like, you know, we
talked about pigs and I was talking about how they're
all big daddies and ship, but you know, hippos extra
thick daddies because they can get up to like ten
thousand pounds that like like three cars. That's insane. I
(29:50):
know that someone had a sexual awakening at the Madagascar
hippo guy at the Lake Modo. Someone not me. I
actually found it super uncomfy, but I'm sure someone did.
It was very uncomfy. I hated it. Um okay, gappy,
(30:12):
is that your entire story? That the end? Yeah? Okay again,
I'm doing fun fox the closest related species to a hippo.
It's not like a rhino or an elephant. It's a whale.
I didn't know that. Oh, I'm just gonna say, is
that a hippo? Though? They are just like very territorial creatures, okay,
(30:33):
and that's why they're attacking people. But they also you know,
for example, like when boats go over them, a lottimes,
fishermen and you know, other boating folks, they'll like, you know,
kind of like poke around the water because like a
lot oftimes, hippos are just underneath the surface, like grazing
at the bottom of the river, and they will just
pop the fuck out. Isn't that sorry? I would never
(30:54):
do genuine I would never go anywhere near a hippos
area ever. No, I know it's hippos than like crocodiles
or alligators or anything like that. I think hippos are terrifying.
Crocodile files are only responsible for maybe like one hundred
deaths in Africa every year, and hippos are like five
hundred to three thousands. Bananas absolutely not, absolutely not. And
(31:15):
also then some studies it's like basically if a hippo
bites you there is an eighty seven percent chance that
you'll die from it, where a crocodile it's more like
a twenty five percent chance. Also, the study also says
the lower end is a twenty seven percent chance for hippos,
but that stat is not as exciting. It's only a
two percent different with crocodiles, but still fatal, not as exciting.
(31:35):
What is the hip like there? Um? Oh my gosh,
what am I trying to say? They're incisors? Their teeth
I was gonna say their their bite is like yeah,
they can open up to like one hundred and eighty
degrees and like it's so much force and pressure. I
think it's like ten times the strength of like our
human jaws, which doesn't actually stund because my jaws I
got a weak jaw. Not to brag, but I'm a
(31:57):
dainty female. I've just found on the internet a hippocage
diving experience in No, um, we're in Africa one second,
so I don't mind. I do not want to do that. Well, well,
wait till you see what the country is, okay, because
maybe you will want to know. It doesn't matter what
country I would send the Okavongo River Thoughts guys, thoughts.
(32:19):
I do not want to swim with hippos. It better
be a thick ass cage, That's all I'm saying. Yes,
it's hippo and crocodile diving. No people do this. I mean.
It's funny though, because like with shark deaths, which we've
we've talked about, We've talked about everything. It's like only
ten people a year I think die from like shark attacks,
but hippos, it's so many more, you know, And like anyway,
(32:41):
I'm scared. I think that a hippo though, a hippo
mouth would be a great place to cradle a baby
because they're so round. Don't put your baby in a
hippo's mouth, don't you dare. Don't you dare. That's not
where you put a baby. I literally physically can't get pregnant,
so it doesn't matter. That's good because I haven't aud
(33:04):
Because are you going to a sad fertility journey? You know? No,
we're not doing that today. Oh but later we might
be talking about fortilitly Okay. So anyway, basically, if your
boat comes up on them and they're grazing at the
bottom of the river, they're gonna like they're gonna come
and get you. And basically hippo's technically can't swim, but
(33:25):
what they do do is they gallop and they use
the bottom of the river to like propel themselves as
they're just kind of like basically like an astronaut on
like ter the moon. It's kind of like how they move,
you know, they're just like but they can just come
the fuck up and they just like get on your boat.
And they're so heavy and Okay, the fact that you
(33:47):
see it as bouncing and I see it as like
trotting towards death, like it's like a death run, is
just like I don't understand. I know, I think it's
so cute, and come on, they've got to be like
very floaty, right, it probably looks silly when they're doing it,
so but then they will like kill you, so that's
not a silly I mean, I'm terrified of them. But yeah,
(34:07):
also it's like bad. I mean they can also even
though they got those little stubby legs, they can run
up to like twenty twenty five miles an hour. So
when you're on land and if you're between a hippo
and the water, it's gonna be like, get out, get
out the way, because they will travel, like, you know,
maybe a mile away from a body of water to
find other vegetation to eat. And so you know if
(34:30):
you're in the way. Also, if you're between a female
hippo and her baby, she's gonna get pissed and she's
gonna charge. Yeah. And then once they get you, they
they get you, and they get you. Do they eat you?
Do they trample you? Do? They just they bite you
a lot. So there's this one guy. I have this
one quote from a dude who got attacked, who survived
a hippo, and let me say it's he said, it
(34:51):
felt as if a bull was making full use of
the whole lot as he mauled me. A doctor later
counted almost forty puncture wounds and bite marks on my body.
The bull simply went berserk, throwing me into the air
and catching me again, shaking me like a dog with
a doll. That sounds but he doesn't eat. Well, yeah,
(35:12):
they are, they are vegetarians. But they have done some
studies where they have seen hippos eat meat. They have
done that. They've like scavenge. They've also there's been a
couple cases where scientists have stumbled across hippos eating other hippos,
like dead hippos, so they also are can be cannibalistic,
(35:33):
so that's very exciting. But hippos are weird because like
their bodies, the way that their teeth are is like
it doesn't make sense that they eat vegetation because like
they can't pull with their teeth, they have to use
their lips. But then also they're you know, they're tuscred
mostly there their incisors are there for fighting. So also,
if you ever see a hippo that looks like it's yawning,
and it's yawning a bunth, that's it getting ready to
(35:54):
attack you, so like run the fuck away. And also
makes like a laughing sound, which is crazy so cute.
A hippo is a paradox. Yeah, anyway, all this in
style was just enormous exposition for another very short story anyway,
But obviously it would seem like a hippo would not
be a very great pet pet. You know, they're you
(36:15):
know people. Maybe we could do maybe we can do
with dogs. You know, over the sentries, we made wolves
turn into pugs. You know, maybe if one day we
could have a little tiny pip hippo, A pippo, a pippo.
It's like a pig and a hippo idea of it's
actually so sweet. Hey, can I say something right now
that this just came back to me. In Spike Kids,
(36:36):
I don't know which number. I think number two, they
had mini animals, like a mini giraffe and like a
mini hippo and a mini elephant. But they were like
real and they had like shrunk them or something like that,
and I wanted that so bad. Um, well, we'll do
that for you over some years of breeding. We're gonna
make that happen for uniqua um cadavergal's breeding wild, domesticating wild.
(36:59):
Don't be our merch, our merch. You get a small hippo.
Literally no, But I wanted to be real, not I'm
a tron. I want the real thing. Yeah, yeah, we're
gonna do it. That's an abomination according to you, Jeff Bezos.
That's what I want from my birthday. Jeff Bezos. I
mean he's trying to get to say, how did you
see the fit that he was throwing recently? He was
like Elon Musk's company got the contract with NASA and
(37:21):
he's like, it's not fair. He literally said that he
sued NASA and was like, it's not fair. Guh Anyway,
Jeff Bezos is my boyfriend. Okay, um um anyway, okay,
not a good pet. But there was this dude in
South Africa. He was a farmer. His name was Marius
Els and in two thousand and five, there was another
(37:45):
farmer that had this hippo. But he was like, this
hippo was too big. I can't take care of this hippo.
So then Marius was like, I will take the hippo
and I will raise it. Okay. And Marius he loved
his hippo and he named his hippo Humphrey. Pretty cute okay,
um yeah, but end badly, I know. But then Marius
(38:07):
described their relationship as a father son relationship. They'd even
go out swimming in the river together and Marius would, yeah,
Marius would ride Humphrey like a horse, and then you know,
Humphrey would come when he was called. And then sometimes
Marius would like brush Humphreys big teeth and stuff. So
it was just very cute. He would he said this
(38:28):
one quote, he said, Humphreys like a son to me,
he's just like a human. There's a relationship between me
and Humphrey. And that's what some people don't understand. They
think you can only have a relationship with dogs, cats
and domesticated animals. But I have a relationship with the
most dangerous animal in Africa, which is actually fake because
the most dangerous animal in Africa is one mosquitoes and
(38:49):
then human. So anyway, that's really smart. Gubby mosquitoes. Yeah,
they kill like a million people every year. So hippo,
you're gonna have to step up your game if you
want to be the most dangerous Honestly, Oh peez. But
Marius came Covid then the hippo. But Marius, his wife
Louise was obviously kind of like, yo, I know you
(39:12):
love this hippo, but I don't think it's really the
best idea to have it. Because no matter how in
the media, because there's this viral photo of him writing
Humphrey and a lot of people saw it, he was like,
no matter how cool it looks or whatever, you know,
he does get into a lot of tomfoolery humphreedom. Like
Humphrey is kind of a bad boy. He honestly like
one time there's his father and son like walking around
(39:35):
near there, and Humphrey went after them, and then they
were stuck in a tree for hours with Humphrey being like,
I'm gonna eat you me And then it was some tomfoolery.
And it wasn't until like Marius came with an apple
and was like, come eat this apple instead of trying
to eat those people, you know, well, I guess just
like bite them. And then also this was a really
fun thing that I actually really liked, was that there
(39:56):
was a golf course nearby and Humphrey was known to
go and terrorize all the golfers on the gold and
the golf site, golf field, golf thing um and the
greens and yeah, he was also they thought he might
be responsible Humphrey for killing a neighboring farmer's calves. So
(40:17):
they're like, this is a bad boy. Humphrey is a
bad boy, okay. And so in twenty eleven, it might
have not been the biggest surprise to people that Marius's
body was found floating in the nearby river with multiple
puncture and bite marks. Obviously it was a hippo who
(40:38):
had done it, and he died by Jaws. It was
it was Humphrey. If we've learned anything on this podcast,
it's don't have animals that shouldn't be and your pets retweet.
(41:00):
Don't have bears as pets. Don't have hippos as pets.
Um not the EMUs Cassawaris. Don't have a cas Cassawari
guy from Florida. Of course, respect nature, you guys. Yeah,
and especially the hippos because they they are fat or daddies,
the fattest daddies besides the whale daddies. They're just you know,
(41:24):
they're gonna get you. So that is a rant about hippos.
They're gonna get you. What a great way to end
your segment, Gabbiall coming up, we're gonna have some more
hippo talk and it's gonna be fun and cute and
stick around. We're back. We're back. So I got to
(41:48):
research this last night on an aquarious full moon. I
feel hello powerful today, and it's because we're diving into
Egyptian mythology. I feel happy and full and ready to
get into this. Thank you, Gabby for the hippo goddess recommendation.
So hippos, they can be scary, but we love them.
And m Gabby sent me this amazing hippo goddess. So
(42:13):
her name. She's an ancient Egyptian goddess of childbirth and fertility.
Her name is Tawarette, which literally translates to the great One. Okay, queens, yes,
girl boss goddess. She's a goddess with the face and
the body of a hippo, two legs that she walked on.
(42:35):
She's a bipedal creature. Um. She had the tail of
a crocodile, the limbs of a lion, and the pause
of a lion, and a long, hanging, swaying breasts. I
love this for her, like two beautiful supple sausages, which
showed fertility. Basically, also in many of the ambulets and
statues that she was always kind of carved out of. Um.
(42:58):
She was very round, and a lot of people say
that it was either because she always appeared like she
was or she appeared like she could get pregnant, and
because I guess being round and supplement that you were fertile,
which interesting how beauty standards change. Okay, So yeah, Saggy Tennis,
You're ready. You're ready, literally absolutely great good news. Yes
(43:27):
for some people. I guess, okay, Taylor. Um. So, obviously
hippos existed in Egypt long before any dynasty was there,
but now they're extinct, which is really sad because of
the Egyptians basically hunted them all down, which is not good.
But um, they were in the Nile. Yes, they were
in the Nile. So when Egyptians began interacting with them,
(43:47):
they feared and they worshiped the animal, and actually the
male hippos they were like, oh, they're scary, and they
basically they thought the male hippos represented chaos, and so
they thought it was like a symbol of chaos, and
many times pharaohs would actually go out with hunting expeditions
and hunt them because it was like a side of power.
But the female hippos were actually like revered because they
(44:11):
fiercely protected their young and so they were not killed
as much. And this led to the birth of a
lot of hippo deities like Tawerette, who were seen as
these protective kind of goddess creatures. Basically, you could find
a lot of hippo amulets and tower at statues in
domestic settings like in people's little houses and stuff, because
(44:32):
she represented the protection of children, of fertility, and of rejuvenation.
There are like many tower At stories that connect all
of these traits, but one of the most popular is
that the eye of Rap, which is the feminine counterpart
to the sun god, Rap got like angry at her dad.
We've all been there, and she fled to Nubia. We've
all been there in the form of a lioness. And
(44:53):
then yeah, absolutely, yes for you say yeah, eventually she
returns to Egypt, but she comes back in the form
of a hippo, and then she brings the flooding of
the Nile. That's like how according to them, the flooding
of the Nile started. Obviously, like the flooding of the
Nile was very important to Egyptian people because it was
it represented their livelihood. Basically, I'm super important and represented fertility,
(45:18):
as we all know, because the soil was very easy
to grow things in. And that's like, we're most of
the economic power and Egypt came from so Tarette was
considered a very fertile goddess and a protector goddess as well.
Childbearing was extremely important but obviously very dangerous in Egypt,
or like anywhere in the like ancestral times, like I
(45:40):
don't know, Orica right now, poor in America right now,
there we go exactly. But producing a sun and having
the sun reached adulthood was really difficult because the informortality
rate was extremely high. So a protective goddess like Tawarette
hippo goddess queen, she became a very powerful symbol and
(46:01):
there were like shrines for her everywhere that she never
got a state run temple, which is fucked up, but
that's all. Yeah. And also there were like hippo cults.
Can you imagine joining a hippogoddess cult? I just I mean,
I think we should start a hippogoddess cult. I literally
absolutely agree. Is that not what we've already done though?
I mean, yeah, this was the initiation ritual, and everyone
(46:24):
that's listening is now initiated. Yeah, once you finish all
the episodes, you are initiate. You are in the hippo
goddess cult. Do you think everybody's going to do that? No?
And then you venmo me five dollars, Okay, But they
would actually use kind of her symbol as like a
protection kind of spell almost, and so she would be
(46:48):
on like her image would be on people's beds or
in like children's items like cups or plates, which I
find so fascinating that like children's sippy cups in ancient
Egypt had this really amazing looking hippo goddess on them
to protect the child, Like that's amazing. And then if
a woman was in labor, partitioners of magic would use
(47:10):
birth magic on them, like on the women by using
their magical ones made out of hippo tusks, and they
would carve a protective circle around the woman, usually on
sand or if a child was like in danger or
he was like sick, they would also carve a protective
circle around the sleeping child. So with the tusk, with
the hippo tusk, Yes, wow, did it work? I mean
(47:35):
it her hippo, yeah, absolutely, And she was revered for
thousands of years, so probably, Yeah, that's great. Well, I
was thinking, like, you know, when you're saying that the
male hippos they represented chaos, I feel like now whenever
I say may chaos reign? What all specifically mean? It's male?
(47:57):
These hippos coming out of the water. Absolutely, yes, exactly,
They're gonna spring up open their little tests, make of
the water. That's what I imagined. They're like boo and
you kill you and then you're dead. Yes, exactly. So
you know, go to cadavergus dot com for your hippo
(48:20):
amulets um, but not if you don't want to get pregnant,
because and your mattress and your small hippo and your
small real genetically modified hippo. It fits inside my teacup.
It's beautiful. Yeah, I love it. Well. I'm so glad
that we learned so much about fertility, about the importance
(48:42):
of balance, about how easy it is to die. Yes
we did, Taylor. Taylor, if you have saggy titties, you're
about to have a baby. Hippo is very fertile, and
the hippo's gonna be I was imagining what if the
hippo was like the midwife. But also, don't put your
baby in the hippo mouth, Nika. There's so so many
(49:04):
contrad victory elements happening. Like I said, you know, we
contain multitudes. I will see you next time. I will
bubble up to the surface and eat all of your
faces next time. And thanks for listening. Goodbye. Cadaver Gals
(49:36):
is a production of School of Humans and I Heart Radio.
It is hosted, produced, mixed, researched, et cetera by Gabby
Watts nic and Taylor Church. You can follow us on
Instagram and Twitter at CADAVERGAUS. See you next time.
School of Humans. Hello, welcome to another episode of Cadaver Gals,
where we talk about the ways people have died throughout
history to cope with our own fragile mortality. I'm your host, Nika,
along with Gabby Hello, oh and Taylor Hi, hi e e.
(00:29):
This is our first show that we've recorded in like
two weeks, so we might be a little rusty. We'll
have to see. So on today's show, we're going to
be covering some light subjects. But here's a trigger warning. Um,
death of a child and animal maaling and diabetes in insomnia.
So if any of those you're like, I don't I
don't do well with that. Um, you know, skip skip
(00:51):
the episode. You are not missing out on anything. Bananas.
To be fair, actually there's some ancient Egyptians we don't
know that. Yeah, talking abouts it could be bananas. Oh
whoa some secrets and oh. On today's show, we're gonna
be covering the dangers of being speepy, which is sleepy,
and why you should stay at a respectful distance from
(01:12):
hippo's lest you get pregnant. That makes sense. Later, que
Illi get her music. So Taylor, I only slept four
(01:36):
hours last night and I would love to hear how
that might kill me? Do you want to go first? Sure?
Oh no, Naka's dead. I'm literally dead. I went to
sleep at like one ish and woke up at five
to take my brother at the airport. Brothers are canceled.
Brothers are canceled. Yes, So I don't know about how
(01:57):
y'all find your your cases, but I try and find
things that are relevant to my life to scare myself more,
I guess, but like something that I see or experience,
And right now I am so tired. I'm so tired.
I feel like I could die. I feel like that
is like a feeling. This feels like it's going to
be connected to your story. Yeah. Well, people get angry,
(02:19):
and I am the one. I'm the type of person
that gets like sleep angry, Like if I cannot find
a place to sleep when I'm tired, or if I
can't go to sleep for some reason, I get so mean.
Oh I become a different person. I literally I think
last night I was like hitting myself on the head
because I just was like, I need to go to bed,
I knock myself out. I need to do something, and
I was out of weed. So yeah, it's just like
(02:40):
I get so mean. Well, anyway, there's this one perfect Okay, Gabby,
I actually know for a fact that you suffer from
severe insomnia. Yeah, but I'm also perfect in spite of myself. Yeah, okay,
therapist work. So there's this one fella who took it
a little too far. In twenty twelve, there was this
(03:03):
Chinese man. His name was not disclosed to protect him,
so I don't know what his name was, but anyway,
he was quite the soccer enthusiast and he was determined
to watch all of the Eurosoccer Tournament in twenty twelve.
He wanted to see every single game. He was a
huge fan of France and England. But still he was like,
(03:25):
I still need to see how everything else goes while
he's in China, remember, and the time zone thing became
quite a problem. So basically what he would end up
doing is he'd go to work and then he'd stay
up through the night to watch all of the games,
go straight up to work and did this for eleven nights. No,
that's a long time. It's a very long This is
(03:47):
why sports are a danger. Yeah, and gaming because a
lot of gamers I feel like that happens to gamers too.
They just like stay up. Oh my gosh, it's so relatable.
I used to do that with Sims all the time. Sims, Yeah,
I'm a gamer, guys. Is that count Yeah? I guess
reely not. But whatever. Well anyway, so eleven nights followed
(04:10):
by a full day of work. I don't really know
what he did for a living, but when he would
watch the games, he'd drink with friends, he'd smoke a little.
And on June nineteenth, he watched Italy beat Ireland two oh,
headed home to shower, got it. He was like, you know,
it's time to get a good night's sleep, do it
all again, Except for this night, he did not wake
(04:31):
back up. He died from exhaustion of staying up for
eleven nights. The alcohol and smoking, for sure didn't help,
but that was not the cause. It was ultimately the
lack of sleep that got him. And like the exhaustion
from like just go go, go, go go. What was
the exact like cause of death. Was it just exhaustion
or was it like heart failure or was it it
(04:53):
was exhaustion? Thing just like like his body, just like
his body was just like I'm done that's just you
have to reset. So interestingly set into a new life. Wow,
he rapped, he rebooted into a new life. Yeah, so interestingly. Actually,
there was this high school teenager in nineteen sixty four
and he was like trying to conduct his own study,
(05:15):
which like in high school, like that's really intense, Like
I'm going to do with study. I was not that ambitious,
but he wanted to see what the effects of like
no sleep would have on a person. And he too
made it to eleven days. He didn't die, but he
suffered a great deal of side effects. He had hallucinations
and loss of muscle control, short term memory loss. He
(05:36):
actually so they were like, you know, he was like
doing all these things, like trying to see like what
he could and couldn't do with like this lack of sleep.
And he was like they're like, okay, can you count
backwards from one hundred? And he would like get through
a few numbers and then just totally forget what he
was doing, like it's that bad. And then at one point,
which this is kind of silly to me, he was
convinced that he was a professional football player and would
(05:59):
like argue with anyone and like get into a fight
with people if they like said, like, no, you're not,
You're just like a high soul student. He was like
losing his sanity. He was losing that's so dangerous mind.
But um, so, I think I think he was also
trying to get like a Guinness Book of World Records.
But like they don't they don't recognize recognize dangerous things
(06:20):
like that anymore, which is kind of weird. I mean,
everything seems dangerous in the Guiness Book World Records. Well, yeah,
that's true, but very extra. There's the Greate challenge right now.
So I feel like, you know, so dumb dangers still
be dangers. Can you tell um listeners what the great
challenges for those who are not on Twitter? I was, okay,
(06:40):
I was out of town. I came back and I
was like, what is going on with these people flying
off of creates? What is happening? Yes, it's like people
are stacking creates like a pyramid, and then you so
it'll be like starting with like one to two to
three to four to five to six to multiple you know,
stacked on top of each other, and the challenges to
walk across them. And so obviously as the taller they
are the more unstable they are, so the more likely
(07:03):
you're going to fall. And they most people see in
the videos, I've seen a lot of people do be
fallen and it looks very painful. So yeah, but I
guess the Guestbook of World Records isn't gonna isn't gonna
acknowledge the tallest crates. So you, guys, if that's what
you're going for, which I don't think. I think literally
it's just tomfoolery and debauchery and the world is the
world is also losing its mind milk. That is true.
(07:27):
Maybe the world needs more sleep. But what I will
say about the milk crate challenge is crates were really dangerous. Okay,
my friend who will be unnamed, and I will not
give any details other than this, they woke up at
night and accidentally like fell on a bunch of crates
and really really damaged their organ they're what they're under
(07:51):
organ oh oh, the genderless genital organ. Yeah, and it
was like really really bad all from like falling on
some crates. So wow, I mean, don't sleep by crates.
Semple fix obviously, I know, I know. Back to the
(08:11):
whole sleep thing. The good news so so against book
World Records, is like that's too dangerous. We're not going
to do stuff that like can like really kill you
like that. But this kid was like after eleven days,
he got fourteen hours of sleep and was like fully recovered.
So like, okay, this guy was fine, but like eleven
days was kind of that's it's just ironic or something
(08:34):
that it was eleven days for both of them. Yeah,
But also this guy was sixteen and maybe he wasn't
doing alcohol and smoking, so that's true. The other guy
was I think twenty six and whatnot whatever it was
that he was doing. But um, but anyway, so smart.
So there was this one comparison that I read throughout
the day. Your brain is just like getting dirty and
(08:56):
like toxic, and and the more that you're awake and
the more that you're like thinking and whatever, you're basically
dirtying up your brain. And sleep is like a way
of washing your brain to clean it up. Which, honestly,
it seems like a very good comparison because to me,
there's nothing like better than a good night's sleep. But
here's the thing, like we not cadaver, we but like
(09:19):
the scientists, we don't really know much about like why
do we sleep? We spend like a third of our
lives in this weird state of pause. But then we
don't really know like why. I mean, we know that
it makes us feel better and it energizes and restores us,
but like why, like evolutionarily speaking, like the why for that,
we just don't really know evolutionary speaking, it doesn't make
(09:40):
sense because if like you close your eyes to sleep
and rest and you're not aware, and then predators will
get you, you know, exactly. So there's a few theories,
right because it just seems like you're you're just a
very vulnerable state. But there's a few theories. Um, like
Harvard did some some study, some science, they did studience,
(10:00):
you know, Harvard sit Harvard exactly. But one is basically inactivity.
You're not moving, you're not alerting predators. Second is like energy,
which you know, that makes sense. I'm just so sort
of still, except for I move a lot when I sleep,
so that that doesn't work. Oh I don't I sleep
like a ballerina? Yeah you do, don't you have your
(10:23):
my little up Nika sleeps with like she lays on
her back. She's got her silk pillow, she's got her
lavender spray. She's got like one knee up, but she's
just like a pirouette. Yeah. Position and hands are like
resting on my tummy. You are just it's not really graceful.
(10:43):
Mine is the eye sleep of the exact opposite. I'm
a gremlin in the cave. Yeah, I love my little gremlins.
So the second the second theory is that it's for
energy conservation. So like at a time when there was
not a lot of food available, you needed to conserve
the energy that the food gives you by resting, so
you have the energy to basically go out and find
(11:05):
more food. And then another theory is that sleep is
just restorative and the body like is literally just like
repairing itself. Like back to that comparison earlier about like
your brain is just being like dirtied up throughout the day,
especially Nika's Oh, Nika's Nika's mind so dirty. All Yeah,
(11:25):
someone complimented my stand up recently saying I was nasty,
So you are nasty, Gabby. The amount of anal jokes,
I mean, oh my goodness. But the thing is, I
love them. It's funny. Change it is funny. And so
the last theory is brain plasticity theory where your brain
is literally building and creating memories and learning, which okay,
(11:45):
I actually have my own theory. So I was living
to say, cada pals give us a theory like like
as a joke, but clearly you know I got one,
and this isn't really a joke. So okay, when my
sister had just had her baby, she was very tired, right,
like obviously, like you have you have just done a
very intense thing. Your body has undergone an insane amount
(12:07):
of like stress and trauma and so like some like
around this time, I was watching TV and there was
like this story about how like the reason you forget
when you drink too much is because sleep is what
stores your memories, and so if you drink too much,
you're not getting that deep rim the right kind of sleep,
so your brain is just not making those memories. Therefore
(12:30):
you forget. Okay, So I think the same thing with kids.
So this probably is going to be very controversial, but
like so as rat torture, so whatever, why people don't
actually care about children, It's just about animals, right right right,
So okay, you're so tired when you have a kid
that you forget how hard it is to have a newborn,
Like you're just you're not making that memory of like, wow,
(12:52):
that was really hard, Like I don't ever want to
Like I imagine there are times I don't have a child, obviously,
but I imagine there are times where you're like, this
is too hard. I don't ever want to do this again.
You know. Wow, that's actually true though, because I was
talking to my friends. My friend was talking about her
sister who has had children, and she's like she would
pop another one out, like if she could right now,
(13:14):
and because she literally doesn't remember how like difficult it
was at the start, and then she just is like, oh,
I want another one, and then go through the entire
cycle again exactly. So you're so sleep deprived that you
forget how hard it is, Like I swear to God,
every like there no one would have more than one
child if they actually got the proper amount of sleep
and remembered, if they could like really take it in. Yeah,
(13:36):
So that's my that's my weird theory about how no
one would have multiple children if you actually were able
to sleep. So I'm just playing women are dumb, um. Well,
I love a good theory. Taylor You're welcome. Yes, But
(13:57):
so I'm gonna I'm gonna flip it a little bit
because I did come across this condition called fatal familial
insomnia or FI, which is basically it's this condition where
people literally just stop sleeping. It's not insomnia or like,
it's just literally or like, you know, just getting distracted
and so you don't fall asleep. It's literally their body
(14:17):
is just like they're just not going to sleep. And
it's the super rare genetic condition where the body is
just like, Nope, no more sleep, I don't do it anymore.
It's so rare that there's only twenty eight families that
have this genetic mutation. Keep them away from me. I
love my sleep. I'm not reproducing with any of those
people in those families, I know. So they're it's fine,
(14:40):
well they basically by fifty yes. But what happens is
is there's this protein that mutates and it makes the
proteins in your brain fold in all these weird ways
and makes these holes in your brain, which is kind
of similar to mad cow disease apparently. But basically what
happens once you're diagnosed, like you will die within the
year and the symptom. Yeah, it's crazy. Oh my gosh.
(15:04):
The symptom are really weird and kind of jarring. They're
just kind of like random, like one day you're kind
of good and then the next you're like, Okay, my
pupils are really small, I'm sweating a lot. My speech
is really weird, memory problems, muscle weakness, involuntary muscle spasms,
kind of like Parkinson's fever, rapid heart rate, high blood pressure,
(15:25):
increased production of tears. Oh my gosh. Yeah. So basically
it's like your body just like falls apart and there's
no treatment like right now. But like I said, it's
super rare and it's genetic. So the odds are there's
only twenty eight families out there that we know of
the habit. They can't they can't like, um, put you
(15:49):
down for no, like put you down for eight hours,
so your body is forced to rest. No, That's what
I'm saying, is your body your brain, like there's something
whatever the protein and your brain does it. Like you
just you don't sleep. You can't do it. It's impossible,
Like I don't even I mean I don't. That's interesting
if you like you're saying like if they put you
(16:11):
on our anesthesia. Yes, yeah, I don't know. I don't
I have no idea. I kind of feel like noum
based on your scientific conclusion. It's like the proteins are
stronger than melatonin, which is easy to do. Honestly, Melotone
is kind of like a pussy drug for like insomniacs. Honestly,
what's your favorite insomnia drug, Gabby? Or is it like
(16:33):
to talk about I started taking melatonein guys. It is great.
I love well. I do take melotone, but I think
they don't know how long you should. You shouldn't take
it as long as I've been taking it. But not
to brag I'm crazy, um, but I used to take
Ambien in college when I was really bad. And let
me tell you, Ambien is so lit because I would
(16:54):
take it and I would stay awake to see like
how long I could stay awake, and I would just
like I would hallucinate. It was pretty fun. That is
so dangerous exactly, Like you have to have sleep, like
we don't know, we don't necessarily know why, but we
know that, like you just have to have sleep like
the most that you can. Like Okay, So I have
this book and I was reading it, m bragging you
(17:16):
read I read a book and too. Yeah, it's called
what really Happens if you get swallowed by a whale
or shot from a cannon or go barreling over dagra
and then you're dead. Yeah. So basically they were like,
if you have the option to sleep or um, what
(17:42):
was it? Why is my brain not processing this? Basically? Yeah, exactly.
Basically it's it says like, if you choose choose, can
choose hunger over sleep deprivation, choose to be hungry, like,
always go to sleep instead because it's less it's it
is a less painful I mean dinner, so it's all miserable. Um.
(18:07):
But my last theory that I will leave you guys with,
which this is something that I very strongly believe in,
is invest in your bed. Okay, here's what. Nika's rolling
her eyes because she's heard me say this. I have,
but also, honestly, I want to steal the covers that
are behind you. I think the collar is so pretty.
And I sleep sometimes I get drunk at Taylor's house
(18:30):
and I stay the night and I stay in her
guest bedroom and it's like this beautiful emerald green bed
and the duvet is fluffy at the pillows are fluffy,
and I wake up so well rested, and she usually
has waffles in the morning. M cadaver Gals is sponsored
by Mattress Firm. Invest in your match. Go to Mattress
form where they have one employee, but there's like twelve
(18:51):
stores next to each other. Are serious, okay, are you ready?
So if you invest in your bed, you need to
have like good sheets, good mattress, good everything, as much
as you know, take the best that you can get,
because if you have a bad night's sleep, you're gonna
have a bad day. You have a bad day, you
go to work, maybe you get fired, you get fired,
(19:12):
you have no money. You have no money, you can't
buy anything. And you can't buy anything. Then that's a
you know, and you can't get a good bad capitalism
okay anyway, and then you die and then die if
you don't want you can't have the things like it'll
literally ruin your life if you have a bad night's sleep.
I'm very convinced of it, Taylor. The stakes are so high, now, yeah,
(19:34):
the stakes are insane. I'm really nervous now, well, you know,
thank you, Taylor, thank you for that. Thank you. Everybody
got to take a nap. Yeah, I'm I want to
stop this right now to go take a nap, but
I won't. Um when we come back, you know, more
sleep talk, Oh more pillow talk, but not in a
sexy way, unless you think death is sexy, right, welcome back?
(19:58):
You know that? As people would say, Um, I don't
know whe that came from, Gabby. I have a question
before we dive into my tangent. What was the weirdest
hallucination that you saw when you were on Ambient? Oh okay,
so I would like hallucinate feelings, so I would like
I felt. I was convinced whenever I would take Ambient,
I was convinced that I had these like guardian angels.
(20:20):
But what they were was that they were fairies and
they had they were like autumnal themed fairies. So they
had like like leaves, like fall leaves, like as wings,
and I didn't I never saw them, but I knew
they were there. Oh my gosh, okay, wait, we believe
in the Faye on this podcast. We believe in them,
So that's amazing. Wow. I thought it was gonna be
(20:43):
creepy because you usually are creepy, but now it was
my autumnal themed fairies that looked over me. I'm gonna cry.
Oh okay, But also I was probably taking too much
sleep medication, so I wouldn't say it's cute. Do you
still think they're with you? Um? I know I forgot
(21:03):
about them because, you know, I realized that I didn't
need to be as stressed out all the time. By that,
I mean I still am, but in a different way,
but in a way that I sleep a little bit
more now. So I don't think about the autumnal themed fairies,
but I do like to think that I like being
reminded that they're there, you know, I remind you so sweet? Yeah,
(21:24):
I love this. Okay, well, thank you for that. So
obviously we've learned the dangers of not letting your peepers rest.
That is scary stuff. I am scared for myself right
now because my eyes are lit to really closing. But
if you are like me and you enjoy sleep, you
enjoy a nap, you enjoy closing your eyes and just
taking a fucking break from the world, or like sometimes
(21:45):
I do the same with glasses. If I'm wearing glasses
and I just have seen enough. I'll just take them off. Yeah, literally,
are you in danger too? Like is that bad for you?
The answer is yes. So, according to asshole researchers, if
you sleep more than hours a night, you are probably
depressed and poor. I'm not kidding. They literally are like
(22:07):
depression and low socioeconomic status, and I feel personally attacked.
And the idea from that, you know, mean theory is
that people who maybe don't have access to healthcare. Hey,
who's uninsured raise your hand? Or who maybe they just
don't get like routine checkups, they seem to have more
undiagnosed illnesses and then they try to like just you know,
(22:29):
quote unquote sleep it off, which I really hate how
like strongly this is hitting me. And then obviously depressed
people have less energy slash motivation, which causes them to
sleep more. Obviously, so those are like two things that
oversleeping can lead to. Slash might be the cause of
hate to say it, researchers are probably right. And they
(22:49):
also found out that oversleeping constantly, usually from like a
medical situation, could actually lead to type two diabetes by
making your body more insulin resistant. Like what the heck,
I'm mad. Also, more than nine hours a night is
like not insane. I like to get like eight to
nine hours. So like, am I gonna die? Well, we're
(23:10):
all gonna die at the end, but in the end,
in the end, we're all gonna die. Also, we'll be
well rusted, right, I mean yeah. When people be like
you sleep when you're dead, I'm like, fuck off, bitch,
Like I don't want my life to be bad by
being tired. It's true. It's true. Like people who go
on like benders. I'm just like, listen, when I'm at
(23:33):
the club, one am rolls around, twelve am rolls around,
and I'm like, um, it's been real nice. The happy
hour drinks are over, Like I got in for free
because I came out at ten, Like I'm ready to go,
you know, It's just I'm ready to wrap it up.
I'm ready to be in bed anyway. Yeah, I'll still
go to the club here, we're big club club gang.
(23:53):
I'm like, ten o'clock rolls around, where's my melotonin? I
love it, Gosh, I love a ten o'clock bedtime. Okay,
that's actually my plan tonight to go to bed at ten. Also,
oversleeping could make you more likely to be obese. And
then because you're more likely to be obese, apparently, it
could make you more likely to suffer from heart disease. Literally,
(24:16):
it's insane, okay, And there's and there's more. There's more. Apparently,
in twenty nineteen, people who reported that they were sleeping
nine hours or more per night, we're twenty three percent
more likely to suffer from a stroke. We I can't win,
I cannot win. But those are just people sleeping in
twenty nineteen. It's a different year. It's a different situation.
(24:37):
You're gonna die of a lot of other things. Now,
there's so many, so many more reasons to die. Um
also ways, you don't know what I meant? Okay, I
have I have just one more. And this one is
like a little bit of a stretch. I mean in
my brain, I'm like, are these male research ours? But
(25:01):
apparent what are you about? Get ready? Get ready for this?
Get ready. Researchers believe that when the circadian rhythm is disrupted,
which is the sleep rhythm or the sleep cycle, women's
internal clock, which is the one that has to do
with fertility and opulation and all that yummy stuff, is
also disrupted. So causing basically infertility. Oh women crazy, yes,
(25:27):
but like I feel like they could use this for
oversleep or for undersleep, like this is all a stretch
and then um yeah, and then the last one is
apparently oversleeping has also been linked to the classic big bad,
which is death. M Um, just yeah, I still, I
just this conversation makes me want to take a nap.
(25:48):
I know that that's not how that I should be reacting.
I should be like, oh, I should go be active.
So boring. No, hey, okay, Gabby, do you have something better? Well,
you better because your story, well, Nica, I guess I
will do my story now if that's all right with you, Um,
that would be fine with me. I think I can
(26:10):
approve that. Yeah. Great. Um. It's going to be mostly
a series of fun facts, and starting with the funnest fact,
which is, um, actually this is not fun at all
what I'm about to say. But in twenty fourteen, we're
in Niger, Africa, okay, and there is a boat of
twelve school children ages twelve, thirteen, fourteen, and they were
(26:32):
on a little river tour and all of a sudden
their boat on the river was attacked and then it
was capsized and they all died or literally what kind
of door are you doing? Like, yeah, what is happening
any more? The end? The end? Okay, no, well, so
(26:53):
what happened was that they were attacked by a hippo
and a hippo capsized their boat and then they either
drowned or also got attacked by the hippo and the
hippo done bit them. So is that a terrible story?
It's terro it's very sad, and it's actually the crazy. Okay,
So hippos, Okay, I'm sorry I'm saying this so cavalierly,
(27:15):
but there was also not as much detail about the stories,
just like this terrible thing happened, and then it's like,
oh shit, yeah that is terrible. But you know, hippos
are you know, one of the most dangerous animals out there.
They you know, they say anywhere from like five hundred
to three thousand people die every year from a hippo attack.
And even it's crazy how COVID has actually increased hippo
(27:39):
attacks and certain parts of Africa for example, So basically
with COVID, like there's this one place in Kenya where
a lot of the money that they make is by
farming and exporting flowers, and because of COVID it's usually
the Europe A lot of Europeans, you know, weren't buying flowers,
so they lost a lot of the money. But they
usually make off of sending exporting products to Europe. So
(28:01):
what ended up happening is a lot more people had
to you know, become fishermen or you know, to actually
had to fish to just stay in their families instead
of just like buying food and so. But also maybe
because of climate change, but also just because of like
um weather patterns. There's this one like that then became
over flooded more like more water than usual, So there's
more hippos. And then also they were fishing. There's just
(28:23):
more people fishing, and then the hippos. Hippos are very territorial,
so with more people fishing, there's more people who have
been attacked and killed by hippos because of COVID. Wow,
and climate change a little bit unintended consequences. Yeah, so
of eating a bat, of eating a bad bad boy. Um, anyway,
(28:47):
it was God, it was good. But I'm mad because
hippos are so cute, you know. I well, Western media
would have you believe that they're so cute just because
they look like they basically look like they're made out
of bubbles. You know, they just are like wrote ton
and then there's like fucking Fantasia. We all saw those
(29:09):
hippos that were ballerinas and we were like, We're like, wow,
look at those big ladies getting in looking good. I
thought that hippos were pink and they're not another like
gray baby baby hippos. That's my that's my um. Adding
(29:29):
to the conversation, I just love them. They're so cute.
It's so frustrating. Yeah, and they're like, you know, we
talked about pigs and I was talking about how they're
all big daddies and ship, but you know, hippos extra
thick daddies because they can get up to like ten
thousand pounds that like like three cars. That's insane. I
(29:50):
know that someone had a sexual awakening at the Madagascar
hippo guy at the Lake Modo. Someone not me. I
actually found it super uncomfy, but I'm sure someone did.
It was very uncomfy. I hated it. Um okay, gappy,
(30:12):
is that your entire story? That the end? Yeah? Okay again,
I'm doing fun fox the closest related species to a hippo.
It's not like a rhino or an elephant. It's a whale.
I didn't know that. Oh, I'm just gonna say, is
that a hippo? Though? They are just like very territorial creatures, okay,
(30:33):
and that's why they're attacking people. But they also you know,
for example, like when boats go over them, a lottimes,
fishermen and you know, other boating folks, they'll like, you know,
kind of like poke around the water because like a
lot oftimes, hippos are just underneath the surface, like grazing
at the bottom of the river, and they will just
pop the fuck out. Isn't that sorry? I would never
(30:54):
do genuine I would never go anywhere near a hippos
area ever. No, I know it's hippos than like crocodiles
or alligators or anything like that. I think hippos are terrifying.
Crocodile files are only responsible for maybe like one hundred
deaths in Africa every year, and hippos are like five
hundred to three thousands. Bananas absolutely not, absolutely not. And
(31:15):
also then some studies it's like basically if a hippo
bites you there is an eighty seven percent chance that
you'll die from it, where a crocodile it's more like
a twenty five percent chance. Also, the study also says
the lower end is a twenty seven percent chance for hippos,
but that stat is not as exciting. It's only a
two percent different with crocodiles, but still fatal, not as exciting.
(31:35):
What is the hip like there? Um? Oh my gosh,
what am I trying to say? They're incisors? Their teeth
I was gonna say their their bite is like yeah,
they can open up to like one hundred and eighty
degrees and like it's so much force and pressure. I
think it's like ten times the strength of like our
human jaws, which doesn't actually stund because my jaws I
got a weak jaw. Not to brag, but I'm a
(31:57):
dainty female. I've just found on the internet a hippocage
diving experience in No, um, we're in Africa one second,
so I don't mind. I do not want to do that. Well, well,
wait till you see what the country is, okay, because
maybe you will want to know. It doesn't matter what
country I would send the Okavongo River Thoughts guys, thoughts.
(32:19):
I do not want to swim with hippos. It better
be a thick ass cage, That's all I'm saying. Yes,
it's hippo and crocodile diving. No people do this. I mean.
It's funny though, because like with shark deaths, which we've
we've talked about, We've talked about everything. It's like only
ten people a year I think die from like shark attacks,
but hippos, it's so many more, you know, And like anyway,
(32:41):
I'm scared. I think that a hippo though, a hippo
mouth would be a great place to cradle a baby
because they're so round. Don't put your baby in a
hippo's mouth, don't you dare. Don't you dare. That's not
where you put a baby. I literally physically can't get pregnant,
so it doesn't matter. That's good because I haven't aud
(33:04):
Because are you going to a sad fertility journey? You know? No,
we're not doing that today. Oh but later we might
be talking about fortilitly Okay. So anyway, basically, if your
boat comes up on them and they're grazing at the
bottom of the river, they're gonna like they're gonna come
and get you. And basically hippo's technically can't swim, but
(33:25):
what they do do is they gallop and they use
the bottom of the river to like propel themselves as
they're just kind of like basically like an astronaut on
like ter the moon. It's kind of like how they move,
you know, they're just like but they can just come
the fuck up and they just like get on your boat.
And they're so heavy and Okay, the fact that you
(33:47):
see it as bouncing and I see it as like
trotting towards death, like it's like a death run, is
just like I don't understand. I know, I think it's
so cute, and come on, they've got to be like
very floaty, right, it probably looks silly when they're doing it,
so but then they will like kill you, so that's
not a silly I mean, I'm terrified of them. But yeah,
(34:07):
also it's like bad. I mean they can also even
though they got those little stubby legs, they can run
up to like twenty twenty five miles an hour. So
when you're on land and if you're between a hippo
and the water, it's gonna be like, get out, get
out the way, because they will travel, like, you know,
maybe a mile away from a body of water to
find other vegetation to eat. And so you know if
(34:30):
you're in the way. Also, if you're between a female
hippo and her baby, she's gonna get pissed and she's
gonna charge. Yeah. And then once they get you, they
they get you, and they get you. Do they eat you?
Do they trample you? Do? They just they bite you
a lot. So there's this one guy. I have this
one quote from a dude who got attacked, who survived
a hippo, and let me say it's he said, it
(34:51):
felt as if a bull was making full use of
the whole lot as he mauled me. A doctor later
counted almost forty puncture wounds and bite marks on my body.
The bull simply went berserk, throwing me into the air
and catching me again, shaking me like a dog with
a doll. That sounds but he doesn't eat. Well, yeah,
(35:12):
they are, they are vegetarians. But they have done some
studies where they have seen hippos eat meat. They have
done that. They've like scavenge. They've also there's been a
couple cases where scientists have stumbled across hippos eating other hippos,
like dead hippos, so they also are can be cannibalistic,
(35:33):
so that's very exciting. But hippos are weird because like
their bodies, the way that their teeth are is like
it doesn't make sense that they eat vegetation because like
they can't pull with their teeth, they have to use
their lips. But then also they're you know, they're tuscred
mostly there their incisors are there for fighting. So also,
if you ever see a hippo that looks like it's yawning,
and it's yawning a bunth, that's it getting ready to
(35:54):
attack you, so like run the fuck away. And also
makes like a laughing sound, which is crazy so cute.
A hippo is a paradox. Yeah, anyway, all this in
style was just enormous exposition for another very short story anyway,
But obviously it would seem like a hippo would not
be a very great pet pet. You know, they're you
(36:15):
know people. Maybe we could do maybe we can do
with dogs. You know, over the sentries, we made wolves
turn into pugs. You know, maybe if one day we
could have a little tiny pip hippo, A pippo, a pippo.
It's like a pig and a hippo idea of it's
actually so sweet. Hey, can I say something right now
that this just came back to me. In Spike Kids,
(36:36):
I don't know which number. I think number two, they
had mini animals, like a mini giraffe and like a
mini hippo and a mini elephant. But they were like
real and they had like shrunk them or something like that,
and I wanted that so bad. Um, well, we'll do
that for you over some years of breeding. We're gonna
make that happen for uniqua um cadavergal's breeding wild, domesticating wild.
(36:59):
Don't be our merch, our merch. You get a small hippo.
Literally no, But I wanted to be real, not I'm
a tron. I want the real thing. Yeah, yeah, we're
gonna do it. That's an abomination according to you, Jeff Bezos.
That's what I want from my birthday. Jeff Bezos. I
mean he's trying to get to say, how did you
see the fit that he was throwing recently? He was
like Elon Musk's company got the contract with NASA and
(37:21):
he's like, it's not fair. He literally said that he
sued NASA and was like, it's not fair. Guh Anyway,
Jeff Bezos is my boyfriend. Okay, um um anyway, okay,
not a good pet. But there was this dude in
South Africa. He was a farmer. His name was Marius
Els and in two thousand and five, there was another
(37:45):
farmer that had this hippo. But he was like, this
hippo was too big. I can't take care of this hippo.
So then Marius was like, I will take the hippo
and I will raise it. Okay. And Marius he loved
his hippo and he named his hippo Humphrey. Pretty cute okay,
um yeah, but end badly, I know. But then Marius
(38:07):
described their relationship as a father son relationship. They'd even
go out swimming in the river together and Marius would, yeah,
Marius would ride Humphrey like a horse, and then you know,
Humphrey would come when he was called. And then sometimes
Marius would like brush Humphreys big teeth and stuff. So
it was just very cute. He would he said this
(38:28):
one quote, he said, Humphreys like a son to me,
he's just like a human. There's a relationship between me
and Humphrey. And that's what some people don't understand. They
think you can only have a relationship with dogs, cats
and domesticated animals. But I have a relationship with the
most dangerous animal in Africa, which is actually fake because
the most dangerous animal in Africa is one mosquitoes and
(38:49):
then human. So anyway, that's really smart. Gubby mosquitoes. Yeah,
they kill like a million people every year. So hippo,
you're gonna have to step up your game if you
want to be the most dangerous Honestly, Oh peez. But
Marius came Covid then the hippo. But Marius, his wife
Louise was obviously kind of like, yo, I know you
(39:12):
love this hippo, but I don't think it's really the
best idea to have it. Because no matter how in
the media, because there's this viral photo of him writing
Humphrey and a lot of people saw it, he was like,
no matter how cool it looks or whatever, you know,
he does get into a lot of tomfoolery humphreedom. Like
Humphrey is kind of a bad boy. He honestly like
one time there's his father and son like walking around
(39:35):
near there, and Humphrey went after them, and then they
were stuck in a tree for hours with Humphrey being like,
I'm gonna eat you me And then it was some tomfoolery.
And it wasn't until like Marius came with an apple
and was like, come eat this apple instead of trying
to eat those people, you know, well, I guess just
like bite them. And then also this was a really
fun thing that I actually really liked, was that there
(39:56):
was a golf course nearby and Humphrey was known to
go and terrorize all the golfers on the gold and
the golf site, golf field, golf thing um and the
greens and yeah, he was also they thought he might
be responsible Humphrey for killing a neighboring farmer's calves. So
(40:17):
they're like, this is a bad boy. Humphrey is a
bad boy, okay. And so in twenty eleven, it might
have not been the biggest surprise to people that Marius's
body was found floating in the nearby river with multiple
puncture and bite marks. Obviously it was a hippo who
(40:38):
had done it, and he died by Jaws. It was
it was Humphrey. If we've learned anything on this podcast,
it's don't have animals that shouldn't be and your pets retweet.
(41:00):
Don't have bears as pets. Don't have hippos as pets.
Um not the EMUs Cassawaris. Don't have a cas Cassawari
guy from Florida. Of course, respect nature, you guys. Yeah,
and especially the hippos because they they are fat or daddies,
the fattest daddies besides the whale daddies. They're just you know,
(41:24):
they're gonna get you. So that is a rant about hippos.
They're gonna get you. What a great way to end
your segment, Gabbiall coming up, we're gonna have some more
hippo talk and it's gonna be fun and cute and
stick around. We're back. We're back. So I got to
(41:48):
research this last night on an aquarious full moon. I
feel hello powerful today, and it's because we're diving into
Egyptian mythology. I feel happy and full and ready to
get into this. Thank you, Gabby for the hippo goddess recommendation.
So hippos, they can be scary, but we love them.
And m Gabby sent me this amazing hippo goddess. So
(42:13):
her name. She's an ancient Egyptian goddess of childbirth and fertility.
Her name is Tawarette, which literally translates to the great One. Okay, queens, yes,
girl boss goddess. She's a goddess with the face and
the body of a hippo, two legs that she walked on.
(42:35):
She's a bipedal creature. Um. She had the tail of
a crocodile, the limbs of a lion, and the pause
of a lion, and a long, hanging, swaying breasts. I
love this for her, like two beautiful supple sausages, which
showed fertility. Basically, also in many of the ambulets and
statues that she was always kind of carved out of. Um.
(42:58):
She was very round, and a lot of people say
that it was either because she always appeared like she
was or she appeared like she could get pregnant, and
because I guess being round and supplement that you were fertile,
which interesting how beauty standards change. Okay, So yeah, Saggy Tennis,
You're ready. You're ready, literally absolutely great good news. Yes
(43:27):
for some people. I guess, okay, Taylor. Um. So, obviously
hippos existed in Egypt long before any dynasty was there,
but now they're extinct, which is really sad because of
the Egyptians basically hunted them all down, which is not good.
But um, they were in the Nile. Yes, they were
in the Nile. So when Egyptians began interacting with them,
(43:47):
they feared and they worshiped the animal, and actually the
male hippos they were like, oh, they're scary, and they
basically they thought the male hippos represented chaos, and so
they thought it was like a symbol of chaos, and
many times pharaohs would actually go out with hunting expeditions
and hunt them because it was like a side of power.
But the female hippos were actually like revered because they
(44:11):
fiercely protected their young and so they were not killed
as much. And this led to the birth of a
lot of hippo deities like Tawerette, who were seen as
these protective kind of goddess creatures. Basically, you could find
a lot of hippo amulets and tower at statues in
domestic settings like in people's little houses and stuff, because
(44:32):
she represented the protection of children, of fertility, and of rejuvenation.
There are like many tower At stories that connect all
of these traits, but one of the most popular is
that the eye of Rap, which is the feminine counterpart
to the sun god, Rap got like angry at her dad.
We've all been there, and she fled to Nubia. We've
all been there in the form of a lioness. And
(44:53):
then yeah, absolutely, yes for you say yeah, eventually she
returns to Egypt, but she comes back in the form
of a hippo, and then she brings the flooding of
the Nile. That's like how according to them, the flooding
of the Nile started. Obviously, like the flooding of the
Nile was very important to Egyptian people because it was
it represented their livelihood. Basically, I'm super important and represented fertility,
(45:18):
as we all know, because the soil was very easy
to grow things in. And that's like, we're most of
the economic power and Egypt came from so Tarette was
considered a very fertile goddess and a protector goddess as well.
Childbearing was extremely important but obviously very dangerous in Egypt,
or like anywhere in the like ancestral times, like I
(45:40):
don't know, Orica right now, poor in America right now,
there we go exactly. But producing a sun and having
the sun reached adulthood was really difficult because the informortality
rate was extremely high. So a protective goddess like Tawarette
hippo goddess queen, she became a very powerful symbol and
(46:01):
there were like shrines for her everywhere that she never
got a state run temple, which is fucked up, but
that's all. Yeah. And also there were like hippo cults.
Can you imagine joining a hippogoddess cult? I just I mean,
I think we should start a hippogoddess cult. I literally
absolutely agree. Is that not what we've already done though?
I mean, yeah, this was the initiation ritual, and everyone
(46:24):
that's listening is now initiated. Yeah, once you finish all
the episodes, you are initiate. You are in the hippo
goddess cult. Do you think everybody's going to do that? No?
And then you venmo me five dollars, Okay, But they
would actually use kind of her symbol as like a
protection kind of spell almost, and so she would be
(46:48):
on like her image would be on people's beds or
in like children's items like cups or plates, which I
find so fascinating that like children's sippy cups in ancient
Egypt had this really amazing looking hippo goddess on them
to protect the child, Like that's amazing. And then if
a woman was in labor, partitioners of magic would use
(47:10):
birth magic on them, like on the women by using
their magical ones made out of hippo tusks, and they
would carve a protective circle around the woman, usually on
sand or if a child was like in danger or
he was like sick, they would also carve a protective
circle around the sleeping child. So with the tusk, with
the hippo tusk, Yes, wow, did it work? I mean
(47:35):
it her hippo, yeah, absolutely, And she was revered for
thousands of years, so probably, Yeah, that's great. Well, I
was thinking, like, you know, when you're saying that the
male hippos they represented chaos, I feel like now whenever
I say may chaos reign? What all specifically mean? It's male?
(47:57):
These hippos coming out of the water. Absolutely, yes, exactly,
They're gonna spring up open their little tests, make of
the water. That's what I imagined. They're like boo and
you kill you and then you're dead. Yes, exactly. So
you know, go to cadavergus dot com for your hippo
(48:20):
amulets um, but not if you don't want to get pregnant,
because and your mattress and your small hippo and your
small real genetically modified hippo. It fits inside my teacup.
It's beautiful. Yeah, I love it. Well. I'm so glad
that we learned so much about fertility, about the importance
(48:42):
of balance, about how easy it is to die. Yes
we did, Taylor. Taylor, if you have saggy titties, you're
about to have a baby. Hippo is very fertile, and
the hippo's gonna be I was imagining what if the
hippo was like the midwife. But also, don't put your
baby in the hippo mouth, Nika. There's so so many
(49:04):
contrad victory elements happening. Like I said, you know, we
contain multitudes. I will see you next time. I will
bubble up to the surface and eat all of your
faces next time. And thanks for listening. Goodbye. Cadaver Gals
(49:36):
is a production of School of Humans and I Heart Radio.
It is hosted, produced, mixed, researched, et cetera by Gabby
Watts nic and Taylor Church. You can follow us on
Instagram and Twitter at CADAVERGAUS. See you next time.
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