February 27, 2025 • 37 mins
It hasn't even been three weeks since the Super Bowl, and Erin and Charissa are convinced that summer is over! On this episode there are updates galore; more tales of reentry, Erin is getting more time with Mack, they are reading more and learning how to not worry about the things they can't control. After a while, it becomes clear that there are many tales of getting back to regular life over the summer to come on the Calm Down podcast!
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
He wasn't pissed, he wasn't happy, he was just in
four loud shrieks. A Calm Down with Aeron and Carissa
is a production of iHeartRadio. Hi everyone, welcome to the
(00:20):
Calm Down Podcast. Ye, Aaron and I are matchams that
were both wearing hooded sweatshirts. I have horses, and I
need to talk about your sweatshirt because your sweet husband
had this sweatshirt on on the flight home from the
super Bowl and we were all like, oh, I love
that sweatshirt and then cutie mccute did what he went
(00:41):
and got them and I love it. It was a
cute NFL collab with G four, really great great material.
I love it, love it. G four. Let's do a collab,
oh please, and we'll be on a G four or five. Interesting.
I'm really bad about buying merch from like those kinds
(01:03):
of events, But then in retrospect, I'm I was like, oh,
I want something like that. It's like commemorative and nice.
Although I do have my Rebecca mincuff wear by Aaron
Andrews leather jacket. That's great. That's good, you know what.
That's a great club. Okay, welcome. Also that shirt that
that Neon one that I ended up being a big hit.
(01:24):
I love that shirt and I love that shirt when
you wore that day to year rehearsal. That shirt was
ended up being real cute. So how does that work
if people wanted I mean after the fact, like for me,
if I'm oh, we're going to do them next year
for next year Super Bowl, and I think we're going
to do it for the All Star Game because that
was a big hit. So giddy on up. But thanks
(01:45):
for the support this weekend. Yes, tell us everything. Okay,
you guys, there was an amazing event happening. I'll let
Aaron speak to it. Because you partially hosted the event.
I didn't realize you were doing so much with it,
but you were spending your time for a great cause.
Tell everyone about it. So the Los Angeles Kings and
the NHL, they really did a great event on Sunday
(02:09):
and they hosted kind of a celebrity game. They had
four different teams hosted by like Snoop Dogg, Will Ferrell,
Danny DeVito, Vince Vaughn, Michaels, Michael and I didn't get
to see him. There were so you dinner there. I
didn't get to see I was working noo and thank
you to Fox for giving me permission and a thumbs up.
I was told I was doing the in house kind
(02:30):
of like interviews of some of the LA heroes, and
then it went, you know, to the different stations that
were covering it. So thank you so much to our
bosses for being so sweet. It was so much fun,
and I was so proud of the organization and the
league and my husband. My husband worked really really hard
on the event. He's he's so great and I have
to tell you this, our friends in the NFL. I
(02:52):
was kind of giving him a hard time about it.
He uh, he reached out to Travis, he reached out
to Tom, he reached out to I'm forgetting somebody else
with the NFL. He reached out to and he got
all these videos done from guys in the NFL. And
I was like, oh, well, you got him done because
they're my friends. And he was like, babe, and he's
so sweet and so nice, and he did such a
(03:15):
great job getting all this stuff done. And yeah, they
had a lot of the first responders, they had a
lot of people that lost their homes. They had a
lot of people that you know, are trying to help
people get back to life and get back to the
real world with all of it, and they are still
running this LA Strong event and there is still time
to donate, and I'm going to make our social media
(03:37):
people put up the code. But it was really really
fun and these guys came out and they were skating.
I posted a picture with Mackie Babes with Justin Bieber,
which was so cute. Mark Metchnew, who I wanted a picture,
was so bad. Yeah, it was a lot, a lot
of fun and then great people like Andrew Whitwre showed up.
He coached a teenager. Edelman brought his daughter. We had
(03:57):
a big family skate before there's just in a really
neat moment. I wish I was there. I was out
of town, but I just love that. And here's the
thing about those kinds of events, to your point about
Jarrett and the effort, like they don't just happen. That's
a lot of time and effort for people to organize that,
and also for crypto like using you know those venues
(04:18):
and everything that like goes into that, but for obviously
for an incredible cause, and that's the thing too about
these you know, devastating situations, whether it's a hurricane or
whether it's the fires. Like there's the immediate help, right
there's someone's like, oh, I want to help. I want
to help. But then it's like as unfortunately, like life
moves on for people, but it's like life doesn't move
(04:40):
on for the person that's still living sometimes out of
their car or at a relative's house or at a rental.
Like if you're lucky enough you can get that's the
time where it's like you got to check in on
the people that are going through it because everyone helps
right at the beginning, and then you know, life moves
on and sadly like for these individuals. But it's really cool,
and you were interviewing some of the people that just
(05:03):
stepped in into you know, in the world that we
live in, and sometimes people are inherently selfish. When you
see people like that, like the guy that organized all
the meals and those kinds of things, it's just really
special that people step up. So kudos Jared Kings and
everybody who was a part of that. You Matthew Stafford
was the other video. I'm so sorry, but he got
all these guys and it was so neat. Guess who
(05:24):
got the biggest applause though when his face came up,
Can you guess Travis? It was crazy. It was so wild,
like we're like, who it's really special. Yeah, he's the best.
I love that we are in our our re entry
off season phase. Aaron just got back home. I'm coming
(05:47):
back home in a couple of days. Avoiding reality, but
we have a lot that we want to discuss. Aaron
has stepped into the world of let them. We will
discuss that. We all so like many girlfriends do. There's
always that funny meme where it's like we communicate via
text via DMS back and forth and have multiple conversations
(06:08):
going with each other at the same time. Aaron sent
me a great DM that was from Kate Winslet that
resonated with both of us. We'll talk about that. We
got a re entry update. I was saying how last
week when we were talking, how I need to be
less bitchy about things and let stuff go. So I'll
fill you guys in on that, and then also just
(06:29):
what's happening in our world of off season. I know
it's not really an off season because this gal's already
booked and busy. She's got a lunch date, so we're
recording this podcast early so she can go. But all right,
so that's what you were up to over the weekend.
You also before we jumped on here, and you told
me that you started reading the Mel Robbins phenomenon. That is,
(06:50):
let them your thoughts. I know you're early on, but
why did you want to pick up this book? And
now there's dogs barking out there. I don't know much
about Mels. I just she ended up being on my algorithm,
which was refreshing, and I stopped and I listened and
watched her clips from her podcast, and I started sending
them to you, and I think Constance was sending them
(07:12):
to me, and I just was like, okay, I don't
this is a time where I'm not reading the daily
clips about whatever game I'm covering. Let's do something useful
besides watching Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, which I
am deep into right now. I need an update on that.
I haven't seen anything since you told me to watch
the one that went to like got arrested and was like, yeah,
(07:33):
there's a lot happening. Okay, I don't know anything. I
need a recap there. It's so good, Like I don't
do that during the season because I just feel guilty
and I don't really have time. So now I'm full
blown in this is like when I'm doing my skincare
routine or I'm like plucking or whatever, I've got it
on in the bathroom, like it's making me happy, or
I'm purging or I'm trying to put stuff away. It's on,
(07:56):
Like it's on, I'm happy. But then to balance out
the trash and I'm not calling those women trash, but
let's you know, just like bing like yeah, reality tale,
it's reality television. Yeah. I was like, I want to
start reading this book. I need. I'm interested, and I
really love the vibe of let Them Now. I'm not
there yet. I only got like ten pages in and
(08:19):
that was her introduction about the five second what is
it method that she does, which I thought that was
fascinating because she for those of you that haven't joined
the phenomenon that is the let Them train, It's this
idea that she was getting. You know, she was unmotivated
and she was just like lying in bed and she
was had this theory that like a space shuttle, like
(08:39):
five four three two one, and just get yourself out
of bed, just propel yourself and so just something sit
as simple as that was sort of I think that
was her first book, right, that was her first book.
But then anyways, that idea of just you got to
start somewhere, and so that was something. But then the
let them theory is predicted on something that her son.
(09:02):
I think it touched about it. Anyways, I'll let you
guys read the book. You don't want me to tell
it because you're further than I am. Tell me what
you've gotten out of it so far and what's resonated
with you. What do you love? Yeah, I mean even
just that theory of not or the theory that don't
you can't control the things you can't control. So the
idea for her came about when her son was going
(09:23):
to homecoming and he didn't have a reservation for a
restaurant and her daughter was like, who cares if he
doesn't have a reservation, Like, let him deal with the
fact that he's going to get to the restaurant and
they're not going to be full. Or the cursage she
didn't get a carssage or whatever is it called curso
for the his date, or that he didn't have the
tucks or all these things, and like the mother wanted
to she wanted to control this, like we have to
get a touch, you have to get a reservation. You
(09:44):
haven't done that, like, oh my god. And so the
daughter's like just let him, let him fail and all
of these things. But ultimately, like he had a great
time and it didn't matter that he didn't have the reservation.
It didn't matter. So that theory applied to everyday life
is if you don't get invited to a bunch of
your girlfriends at a brunch and you didn't because you
on Instagram or whatever and you didn't get invited, instead
(10:05):
of being upset about it, you're like, well, just let
them like that was they wanted to go to brunch,
you weren't invited, Like, don't obsess about the things that
you can't control. Yeah, And so if somebody wants to
be in a bad mood, like if Steve, Steve doesn't
wake up at a bad But I'm just saying like, if
you know somebody's upset about something, you know, like let them,
(10:26):
Like that's their problem, it's not yours to take on.
So just that continuous ideas is sort of what and again,
what page am I know, I'm pretty pretty part I'm
on page No, I'm only on page forty one. I'm
on that part of let them a tool to implement wisdom.
But anyways, so my sister and my niece are both
(10:48):
reading this book as well, and I just I like,
I like that it's become something that everyone, not everyone,
but a lot of people are adapting and adopting because
it's clear that we all tried to meddle in things
that or control aspects of our life. And so if
this book has resonated with so many people, that means
(11:08):
that everyone needs to just fucking chill out a little bit,
you know. I mean, there's a reason that in this
book they talk about people have like are getting tattoos,
and what if my niece got a tattoo with this?
But just I don't know, I think hopefully, if there's
like this wave of people that are all operating with
a new intention of just being more chill, then maybe
(11:29):
it has a I don't know, maybe it has a
resounding effect somewhere. Maybe she's always something. I love how
she said. And again, I'm only ten pages in, but
she talked about how she was she was asked to
speak at something and she had a nineteen minute panic
attack throughout it, and then she blanked out and she
ended up talking about the five second method was something
she wasn't even going to discuss, and little did you know,
(11:52):
that was the beginning of Ted Talk, and she blew
the fuck up. That's amazing. And so what you think
in your own mind might be like your worst moment
could end up helping. But I think there's a lot
of that too in vulnerability. You and I and know
even when the therapy that I've been through in my life,
it was it's all about for me in particular, it's
(12:12):
been about vulnerability that the more vulnerable I've been, the better.
The more success I've had in relationships, the more success
I've had in friendships, the more success that I've just had,
even in work relationships where I've said to my boss
like I'm really sorry, or I got that wrong. That
one's on me. You know, like in basketball when someone
commits a turnover and they run back down the court
and they're like chap tap their chest like my bad
(12:34):
or you know, you see Baker Mayfield did it. I
saw him do in the playoff game and he fumbled
or something, and he was like sitting on the bench
and he kept going to his team. He's like, my bad,
like taking responsibility for your mistakes or your actions. I
think that there's also so much to be said about that,
but yeah, I'm excited. I'm glad that you're reading it too.
So let's maybe so we catch up and we can
(12:55):
do it together. Oh calm down. Book club, Yeah, I
would love that, andbody else that wants to jump on
board if you haven't already, let's just do it together.
I think it would be really fun and then something
we can discuss to that. I've always wanted to be
in a book club. My friends had a dirty book club,
but I just it started, like, you know, then going
(13:16):
into football, and I was like, listen, these clubs are
as dirty as they can be. You know, I just can't.
I've never read a dirty novel, although I did just
open up to chapter thirteen, which is very apropos how
to create the best friendships of your life cut Yeah yeah, no, no, no,
I'm just saying it was like that was a side
note on this thing, but yeah, jump on board. They
(13:37):
let them train I've never read a dirty novel? Did
you ever have to hide it? Like? Yeah, we talked
about this, like I was trying to keep up with
the book club. By the way, right now, what I'm doing,
I'm telling the book club story, but I'm also trying
to see what other books does old Mel Robbins have
because it's exciting. I letting them very five second one. Right,
(13:57):
that was for sure? We go Yeah the half did
Mel Robin on the podcast here and I know she's busy.
Take Control of your life was in twenty nineteen. The
high five is a journal, work it out the high
five five second rule and let them This is great.
I'm going to be a new mean watch out watch
Out world. Okay, so we're not going to get that
(14:28):
let them tattoos just because I already have too many
tattoos that I shouldn't have gotten. Not that this would
be bad, but anyways, but Aaron, you and I do
need to do a couple of things. We're going to
give ourselves an off season to do list a trip,
another earring. Also, we talked about it on the pregame.
Aaron and I are going to we don't know where yet,
we don't know what we're going to do. But we
(14:48):
have to do a vacation together in the off season.
You know what's crazy, though the off season is already over.
It's over. I mean we talk about I lost over.
I was like, we have to sit down and do
a schedule because every time I turn around in an email,
something's popping up and I'm like, wait, why is this already?
I'm the summer's gone. I don't like that feeling. I
(15:10):
don't like that feeling at all. So we have to
build in some stuff because if not, oh yeah, we're screwed.
I'm excited about like events and dates, but I hate
getting the email where it's like, hey, it's on this
date or it's something's on this date. No, I don't
want to do any dates. Like our nanny the other
day just said to me, when are you going out
(15:30):
of town? Again? When are you doing this? And I said,
I don't know, because I think it's like with football,
you are so it's such a routine. There's such a schedule.
I got on Thursday, I've got this feature Friday, I've
got the game on Sunday. I like acting like I
don't know what anything is. Now I know I've got
stuff coming up. We're going to Tampa together. We're going
to do on podcast at the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Women Summit.
(15:52):
Excited for that, yep, hearing rumors about who may stop buy,
which could be super fun and a time. By the way,
But I like acting like I'm loosey goosey right now
and I don't have a schedule. But summer's over. Off
season is over. Yeah, it's already done, do you Because
when I'm here at the ranch, I am well, I
(16:14):
just billed half mine. I am very It's so I
don't know if you're like this. I like doing things
here that I don't like doing at home, emptying the dishwasher,
doing laundry, like okay, I was wondering if you had
that same thing, Like I wake up here early, like
(16:34):
i'm here like, well, I guess the same kind of
time in LA between six thirty seven's like late, get up,
I feed the animals. I have my own little routine there.
I make my coffee, I go for a walk with
the dogs up to this one little area that I like.
And then I like doing the tasks that I hate
doing at home, like all the homemaker stuff. I make
cookies the other day, Like I don't make fucking cookies
(16:56):
at home, Like what I know. I'm such a like
homemaker here. And as I was folding tells this morning,
I thought to myself, like, I could totally be a
stay at home mom. I don't have any kids, but
like I thought to myself, like I could do that.
I probably couldn't because I'd be bored after like five seconds.
But I don't know. I just have this like maternal
thing is I don't know. I don't know. Like I
(17:16):
meet the bed because Jen was here, so I like
she She's like wanting to strip the bed. I was like,
oh no, I'll do it. I made the bed all
not all these things. And I'm like, I hate doing
I don't. I don't like doing any of that shit
when I'm home. I wonder why. I like, maybe because
we're not in our normal routine and so it just
feels like we have the time to do it. I
don't know, but I kind of liked it because you
(17:38):
don't look at the ranch as like a place where
you know, we're at home, and it's like I got
this closet and I got to weed out. It's like
all my Fox, shit's in there, all my rein gear,
all the craft. It's like, that's still ranch is still
kind of your vaca, your vacation. Yeah, and maybe that's
the way. I don't know, but I just thought to
(17:59):
myself and not like the stay at home but you
know what I'm saying, Like where it was like I
liked being a little homemaker and I liked, like, I
don't even like cooking. And I said Steve last night,
do you want me to make you dinner? And he was like,
are you okay? And I was like, well, what going
to make? Well? I only make three things. I can
only make three things taco, salads, spaghetti, and then like
breakfast for dinner. That's the extent of my cooking. I
(18:21):
don't have any And always there's this girl, Aaron O'Brien
that I follow on Instagram. She is amazing. She does
all of these like quick recipes. I have never made
one of her recipes, but I go in a deep
day of watching them. You have Yeah, I forgot what
it was. I made one of her recipes one time.
You told me about her, so I tried. She makes
one to try so easy wine. Don't this is any
(18:45):
measuring cops. What the hell, No, they don't. And that's
the thing where I'm like, I want to be that person,
and so maybe I'm I don't know, I don't know.
Should I try other than reading? Reading? Other than reading?
What else we do? I think we should have a
checklist for our quote off season, even though we already
(19:05):
say it's over, but before football season starts again. I
think it's important and for anybody else out there, we'd
love some advice, like things that we should do, we
should finish. Obviously, that's embarrassing if we can't finish one book.
So we got to finish this book. Yeah, we'll finish
it like cook once a week. Like, let's think about
our list. Definitely the vacation, we need to clean out
(19:27):
our closets, our purses, all that stuff. Yeah, and then
we need to do something volunteer wise. I don't know.
I'm coming up with a lot of ideas. But then
I think we'll feel very like accomplished by the time
the season rolls around again, and we won't be mad like,
oh my god, the whole off season went by and
we didn't do anything that was a real mel Robins thing.
I think I sent that to you like, do a checklist,
like if you are starting on Sunday night to have
(19:51):
anxiety for the week ahead, like think of the things
you need to get done and write them down. But
I have list, so sister, but I am not. I
have so many lests. Another thing that you sent me
was Kate Winslet. Yeah, had spoke to me. Okay, so
do you explain what it was because I don't know
(20:14):
who did this. I don't know if you were able
to put that together the voices behind it. But there
was some interview that somebody did. It looked recently with
Kate Winslet and they went back and looked at I
don't know if it was like a fashion kind of
show of her. She was on a red carpet and
it must have been promoting Titanic, and they were speaking
(20:37):
about how they thought her dress size was a little
too small for her body and they played that in
front of her, and the interviewer was asking if she
ever confronted the people that said the nasty things about her,
and she said she did, and the interviewer asked what
she said to them, and she said, I hope that
(21:00):
haunts you. And that just spoke to me mmm hmmm,
And I was like, the girl, look at this because
which by the way, let me tell you, working at Fox,
they have this archive, like you can see some of
the amazing costumes from different movies and shows and all
(21:21):
this kind of stuff. Kate Winslet's dressed the famed dress.
Where was the black with the maroon like underlay and
it had the beads. It was like the first one
I think that you see that she's in from like
the dinner the night that like Leo's there, this dress,
the waiste size on it is like this big. It
(21:42):
is so tiny. So the fact that she was fat
shamed at all is fucking insane, like and it's I know,
it's you know, so many conversations about unrealistic expectations for
women and their bodies and the whole thing. But as
it pertained to this, that quote of saying I hope
it haunts them, I think there's a little bit again
(22:03):
this reoccurring theme where let them if they want to
say something about you, if they want to fact shame you,
or if they want to say you're not this, or
they want to let them that's on them, and I
hope it haunts them. I hope they have to live
with that thing instead of letting it be a problem
for her or having her feel bad about it, like, no,
(22:24):
that's their shit, not mine. Like I like that projection
of not projection, but like pushing off of internalizing it,
like just no, get you get to live with the
fact that you're an asshole, like that's your problem, not mine,
because we know somewhere it's like instead of absorbing that
and letting it be something we lose sleep at at
(22:45):
night over people that have you know. And by the way,
I'm not a saint, but I definitely know a few people.
I hope it haunts them. Wait they act you know
what I mean? So that's great. We love Kate Winslet
we love to summarize. But yeah, we're real girls girls,
you know. Yeah. But all that is good. We have
(23:08):
a lot to be thankful for. We have a lot
of exciting things coming up. We're going to make a
list of all the stuff that we wanted to do. Well,
hold on, how's your re entry going? Can we get enough?
Because you were upset about somebody in their loud talking.
(23:31):
How are you guys doing? Where are you with re entry? Better?
Because even in taking my own advice of our is
we posted and when our clips came out, when I'm
like hearing myself, I don't want to be bitchy. I
don't want to be controlling. Steve is so wonderful to me,
especially during the off seats or during the season, and
(23:53):
just taking care of shit at home. So re entry
is going better because I'm putting it on myself to
be more mature about some stuff. Some stuff's good. English's
like English. I'm trying to be better with English stuff.
But also I think it's just being honest about like
(24:15):
I because we're together all the time, you guys are,
and it's fine because I like him, but like up here,
like we're in the middle of nowhere, so it's not
like we're even like going into town and like hanging
out with you know, the people. Like it's just last night,
I was just like looking, He's sent me a text.
I was out doing somebody. He goes, hey, do you
want to come back to the house, And we just
(24:35):
sit at each other, sit on the couch and stare
at each other. That's the text I got. I go, sure,
I'll be down in twenty minutes. We sat on the
couch and it was actually really nice. Steve doesn't like TV,
doesn't not into watching TV. He doesn't share. I always
know that if this guy would have TV's taken out
of his house, if it wasn't for sports. That's the
(24:56):
only thing he likes to watch. Every time he goes, oh,
what are we going to watch? Another? D Dateline? Season
forty two, episode seven. I love Dateline? He goes, Oh, murder,
kill kill. All you want to watch is murder? He goes,
can we watch a comedy? But yeah, he is not
a TV person. I will catch him sitting in a
room listening to Art Pepper, this like jazz musician, and
(25:17):
just staring at the ceiling and I'm like, huh, I
go what does that do to you? And he goes
helps me relax? He goes TV I just like get
inundated and gives me anxiety about like killing and murder.
And I was like, really, because killing and murder makes
me relax because now I don't have to think about
all the things I'm supposed to be doing. I just
think about how great my life is because it's not
that so I don't know it's going good. We just
(25:40):
have to like balance out. I just I miss you.
I think I need a little airon too. Well. Yeah,
I can't get a hold of this chick. She's watching
Dayline and feeding the cows. Where are my friend? So busy?
So it's been two weeks actually, so yeah, I'm ready
to see my girlfriend. Hopefully we get together this weekend.
(26:01):
And I miss Mac. I haven't seen mag what's Mac
been up to? He's busy, fifteen years old. I see
the picture of him and Justin Bieber, which, by the way,
he looks like Justin Bieber. Yeah, and somebody actually said
that to me before I forgot who did. I think
it was somebody at the super Bowl. It was like,
your kid looks like Justin Bieber. I was like really,
(26:22):
And so he's he is cute. He was so good
at that La Strong event we brought him. They were
so loosey goosey about letting him in the locker room.
He was hanging out with dad. Dad was sending me skates.
I know those are the Copauitar's sons. Yakub skates is
so sweet and Jared was like skating with him on
the ice and he loves going fast. That was really fun.
(26:45):
He's good, he's busy, he all right, let's talk about it.
What do we get talk about it? I get it.
He's nineteen months. This is where I am in my life.
We had our babies late. With our baby late, I
was around a lot of people that were having babies
for many years, and I was sitting back and observing.
(27:09):
I went on a lot of family vacations with people
that had kids. I was all my friends from the
La Kings at the time had babies. So I got
to observe a lot of stuff. I realized what I
really liked and what I didn't like. And what I
don't like are kids that have free rein and that
aren't well behaved. What I do like is somebody like
(27:30):
Greg Olsen who has children that walk in, look you
in the eye, shake your hand, and is very are
very respectable. Now I've gone to dinner with Greg and
I've sat next to both of his kids, and Greg
is trying to talk to me and he has said, hey,
it's adult time. Now. I love it. Like listen, no
kid is a saint, No adult is a saint. But
(27:50):
I realize what I want out of a kid. I'm
also having a big struggle of when you learn to
I'm not say discipline, but rack oh yeah, okay. We
went to sushi the other night Jared had to work,
and I love our nanny and she's so great, and
I said, hey, can I take you to sushi tonight?
(28:13):
And twofold can Matt come too? And I think it's
so important to socialize him, and you know, I want
him to sit down and have a meal with me. Now.
Are there times he needs an iPad? Sure, but I
also really get a kick of the fact she's great
to show him you don't need it, and we never
had that. We went to dinner with our parents and
I never had that. Yeah, here's a coloring book and
(28:35):
color crans from the hostess exactly. The one thing I
love about our nanny, Barbara is she is really great
in teaching me how to do things. She is like, Okay,
let's do it this way, let's try it this way,
And so I feel confident and comfortable because I also
have a huge insecurity that I haven't been around for
six months and I want to do it how they've
done it, so I don't mess up the schedule any
(28:57):
whot nanny, my man is not talking yet, but we
are saying something dad, my momm okay, great. He is
so smart. He is very attentive, but we have not
figured out how to lower our voice yet, and we
have stayed while they are related out of nowhere. At Izakaya,
(29:24):
which is a very small sushi restaurant in our town,
one of our favorites. He wasn't pissed, he wasn't happy.
He was just in four loud shrieks where the entire
restaurant turned and looked at me. His father is not there,
and I'm mortified. And I looked at Barbara and I go,
(29:46):
what do we do? What do we do? What do
we do? She goes, it's okay, you're okay, Matt. We
do not yell at the restaurant. We're good. It was
that at the end of the meal, he had had
such a great meal, we gave him ice. But then
in the back of my head, I'm like, am I rougar? Oh?
What am I doing? Because Barbara had said to me
(30:07):
he did that at the park. Everybody turned and looked,
and she said, We're not doing that. We're going to
behave I went home that night and I texted one
of my girlfriends who has kids, and I just said,
at what point. I don't even know if I can
look at him the same after that, because everybody looked
and I was like, what point of I'm like, no,
(30:29):
I wanted to grab him run out, and she's like,
he's nineteen months. He's understand. That's just where I am
right now. I know what I want out of a kid,
and I don't know when to start. She said, you know,
you have to say like, hey, let's not do this.
We're in a place, but he doesn't know what the
help but he does, but he doesn't. Yeah, okay, look
(30:50):
I will step in here only to say this. I
obviously I don't have children. I did grow up. My
mom did daycare for us when we were growing up
because you wanted to stay home with us, and it
was a way for her to make money. So I
was always around kids. I was a nanny. I started
watching it an eleven nine month old when I was
eleven years old, and then stayed with that family until
I graduated high school. Shout out to the Luhamburgers, and
(31:12):
they had three kids, and I would go on vacation
with them and I was the one that would travel
and I was responsible for, you know, when they wanted
to go out to dinner, I was with the kids
and all that kind of stuff. The only thing I
will say about that is like distraction right where it's
And again I'm not the professional nanny that you have,
so I will only say from my own experience, is
that same reason for kids on airplanes. I feel for them.
(31:34):
They don't know what they're doing, their ears are popping,
it feels weird. They're in a confined space, and it's
like they want to move. Especially he's at an age
where it's like he wants to move, he wants to
do things, and so it's like busy. I don't know
about the yelling part, but like that's just more of like, okay,
we don't do that. But like I always feel for
kids when they're like in a situation and they just
want constant distraction, Like take the credit cards out of
(31:56):
your wallet to give them something to do. Here's a
color cran, here's a oh my god, do you see
a bird outside? Like just constantly like give them something
else to do so that they're not like I'm trapped
in this high chair or whatever. Again, I'm not speaking
to that situation that you have. I'm only thinking about
the things that I do with kids. And that's the
part too, where it's like you have went forty to
(32:20):
forty five years without having a child, and now your whole.
I'm so proud of you though, like no one prepares
you for that. Your whole, like your whole and your
whole work. But here I'm gonna say this, and I
don't have an interjection. You guys, Aaron may sit on
here and she's vulnerable about the things that she doesn't
(32:41):
know and all that kind of stuff. She is the
most amazing mom. You will show me pictures of him
sleeping in his crip, will look at the little monitor,
and you'll show me the pain. You are such a
good mother, and I'm really proud of you, like no
one prepares you for how to do that. But I
know that this is like you imagine, you wanted this
for so long and now you have this perfect little boy.
(33:02):
And so if he screams at the restaurant, yeah whatever,
it's true. I was actually thinking of this the other
day and I said this to Jarrett. And I'm very
very also grateful for our help that we have and
we have such a good team in place, and we
are so thankful because whatever, but we are so grateful
for our group. But because it does take a village.
(33:24):
The other day when we got home from Montana, we're back,
We're in our Routineer goes to the office. I was,
you know, with him for a bit. Then I went
to work out, and I was saying to Jarrett, my god,
this is how it's supposed to be. We have such
a lovely like team working with us. But this is
how it is when you don't aren't working and you're
not traveling to Green Bay, or you're not worried about
(33:47):
getting on a conference call. Like I will say this
and not to toot my own horn, it's fucking hard to
do this for a full time job and traveling and
not even traveling like I think of all the football
stories we read where guys talk about their mom and
how they had three to four jobs and they didn't
see their mom during the day and then at night
the mom went to work while they went to bed,
and my mom would go exactly like that is fucking hard.
(34:10):
Like And I'm not saying I didn't give myself enough credit,
but I sat there the last six months thinking about
what a failure I was because I was like God,
I'm like half asking it with foxing, though I wasn't
half asking it with my kid. It is so hard
to do all that. I will sit and I try
to remind you of this. My mom worked three jobs,
(34:31):
my dad was working all the time, like all of
this stuff. And there's never a time, ever, ever, a
time where I look back at my childhood and I
was like, oh, I wasn't loved. All I think about
was I was loved, and my parents were working so
hard so I could have that extra They could make
a hundred oll My mom would make a hundred dollars
at the restaurant, working at a restaurant night so I
(34:52):
could go join the select basketball team where I could
get the new basketball shoes. Like you have to give
yourself the credit, like your kid sitting in that high
chair watching you do that postgame interview and pointing at
the screen and saying, Mama, like I like cried watching
that video. And it's not even my kid. It's just
the fact that like he he sees you working like
that is a beautiful thing. And by the way, if
(35:15):
you don't work, if you stay at home with your
kid all day, that's almost the joy. The hardest job.
I imagine that's the everest job is everybody always says
is the hardest job in the world because it's constant.
So I think all of this is about giving yourself
grace and knowing Like when you got Howie as a puppy,
he would dig, he would chew on things, whatever. How
he's grown up and he's a great dog like mas
(35:38):
a baby, he's like gonna try things until But I'm
really really proud of you and I hope that you're
seeing like instead of instead of focusing on the like,
oh I'm not this or I'm not that, like, I
really hope you give yourself the like this is a
whole different set of you know, things in life that
no one prepares you for and even if you've been
very vocal, you're lucky enough to have help and it's
(36:00):
so really hard. Yeah, yeah, I I love you. Answers
you know, you know went in out. So this in
to summarize. Mel Robbins, we would love for you to
come on the Calm Down Podcast us like you're now
innumerable amount of fans appreciate that you have the vulnerability
(36:20):
to put this down writing so you can help all
of us be better people and just less stressed out
or less you know, upset about things that don't matter
and that we can't control. I'm going to go look
for a new recipe to cook and fold some more
laundry because this is the things I like to do now.
And I love you and I'm going to see you
this weekend. I can't wait to view. Yeah, let's figure
(36:41):
that out. How they tacked? Yep. Okay, you guys, thank
you for listening way in and buy the book if
you haven't already, because we're going to continue to talk
about it. Play along you. Calm Down with Aaron and
Carissa is a production of iHeart Radio. For more podcasts
from iHeart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, app podcast, or
wherever you get your podcasts. M hmm
He wasn't pissed, he wasn't happy, he was just in
four loud shrieks. A Calm Down with Aeron and Carissa
is a production of iHeartRadio. Hi everyone, welcome to the
(00:20):
Calm Down Podcast. Ye, Aaron and I are matchams that
were both wearing hooded sweatshirts. I have horses, and I
need to talk about your sweatshirt because your sweet husband
had this sweatshirt on on the flight home from the
super Bowl and we were all like, oh, I love
that sweatshirt and then cutie mccute did what he went
(00:41):
and got them and I love it. It was a
cute NFL collab with G four, really great great material.
I love it, love it. G four. Let's do a collab,
oh please, and we'll be on a G four or five. Interesting.
I'm really bad about buying merch from like those kinds
(01:03):
of events, But then in retrospect, I'm I was like, oh,
I want something like that. It's like commemorative and nice.
Although I do have my Rebecca mincuff wear by Aaron
Andrews leather jacket. That's great. That's good, you know what.
That's a great club. Okay, welcome. Also that shirt that
that Neon one that I ended up being a big hit.
(01:24):
I love that shirt and I love that shirt when
you wore that day to year rehearsal. That shirt was
ended up being real cute. So how does that work
if people wanted I mean after the fact, like for me,
if I'm oh, we're going to do them next year
for next year Super Bowl, and I think we're going
to do it for the All Star Game because that
was a big hit. So giddy on up. But thanks
(01:45):
for the support this weekend. Yes, tell us everything. Okay,
you guys, there was an amazing event happening. I'll let
Aaron speak to it. Because you partially hosted the event.
I didn't realize you were doing so much with it,
but you were spending your time for a great cause.
Tell everyone about it. So the Los Angeles Kings and
the NHL, they really did a great event on Sunday
(02:09):
and they hosted kind of a celebrity game. They had
four different teams hosted by like Snoop Dogg, Will Ferrell,
Danny DeVito, Vince Vaughn, Michaels, Michael and I didn't get
to see him. There were so you dinner there. I
didn't get to see I was working noo and thank
you to Fox for giving me permission and a thumbs up.
I was told I was doing the in house kind
(02:30):
of like interviews of some of the LA heroes, and
then it went, you know, to the different stations that
were covering it. So thank you so much to our
bosses for being so sweet. It was so much fun,
and I was so proud of the organization and the
league and my husband. My husband worked really really hard
on the event. He's he's so great and I have
to tell you this, our friends in the NFL. I
(02:52):
was kind of giving him a hard time about it.
He uh, he reached out to Travis, he reached out
to Tom, he reached out to I'm forgetting somebody else
with the NFL. He reached out to and he got
all these videos done from guys in the NFL. And
I was like, oh, well, you got him done because
they're my friends. And he was like, babe, and he's
so sweet and so nice, and he did such a
(03:15):
great job getting all this stuff done. And yeah, they
had a lot of the first responders, they had a
lot of people that lost their homes. They had a
lot of people that you know, are trying to help
people get back to life and get back to the
real world with all of it, and they are still
running this LA Strong event and there is still time
to donate, and I'm going to make our social media
(03:37):
people put up the code. But it was really really
fun and these guys came out and they were skating.
I posted a picture with Mackie Babes with Justin Bieber,
which was so cute. Mark Metchnew, who I wanted a picture,
was so bad. Yeah, it was a lot, a lot
of fun and then great people like Andrew Whitwre showed up.
He coached a teenager. Edelman brought his daughter. We had
(03:57):
a big family skate before there's just in a really
neat moment. I wish I was there. I was out
of town, but I just love that. And here's the
thing about those kinds of events, to your point about
Jarrett and the effort, like they don't just happen. That's
a lot of time and effort for people to organize that,
and also for crypto like using you know those venues
(04:18):
and everything that like goes into that, but for obviously
for an incredible cause, and that's the thing too about
these you know, devastating situations, whether it's a hurricane or
whether it's the fires. Like there's the immediate help, right
there's someone's like, oh, I want to help. I want
to help. But then it's like as unfortunately, like life
moves on for people, but it's like life doesn't move
(04:40):
on for the person that's still living sometimes out of
their car or at a relative's house or at a rental.
Like if you're lucky enough you can get that's the
time where it's like you got to check in on
the people that are going through it because everyone helps
right at the beginning, and then you know, life moves
on and sadly like for these individuals. But it's really cool,
and you were interviewing some of the people that just
(05:03):
stepped in into you know, in the world that we
live in, and sometimes people are inherently selfish. When you
see people like that, like the guy that organized all
the meals and those kinds of things, it's just really
special that people step up. So kudos Jared Kings and
everybody who was a part of that. You Matthew Stafford
was the other video. I'm so sorry, but he got
all these guys and it was so neat. Guess who
(05:24):
got the biggest applause though when his face came up,
Can you guess Travis? It was crazy. It was so wild,
like we're like, who it's really special. Yeah, he's the best.
I love that we are in our our re entry
off season phase. Aaron just got back home. I'm coming
(05:47):
back home in a couple of days. Avoiding reality, but
we have a lot that we want to discuss. Aaron
has stepped into the world of let them. We will
discuss that. We all so like many girlfriends do. There's
always that funny meme where it's like we communicate via
text via DMS back and forth and have multiple conversations
(06:08):
going with each other at the same time. Aaron sent
me a great DM that was from Kate Winslet that
resonated with both of us. We'll talk about that. We
got a re entry update. I was saying how last
week when we were talking, how I need to be
less bitchy about things and let stuff go. So I'll
fill you guys in on that, and then also just
(06:29):
what's happening in our world of off season. I know
it's not really an off season because this gal's already
booked and busy. She's got a lunch date, so we're
recording this podcast early so she can go. But all right,
so that's what you were up to over the weekend.
You also before we jumped on here, and you told
me that you started reading the Mel Robbins phenomenon. That is,
(06:50):
let them your thoughts. I know you're early on, but
why did you want to pick up this book? And
now there's dogs barking out there. I don't know much
about Mels. I just she ended up being on my algorithm,
which was refreshing, and I stopped and I listened and
watched her clips from her podcast, and I started sending
them to you, and I think Constance was sending them
(07:12):
to me, and I just was like, okay, I don't
this is a time where I'm not reading the daily
clips about whatever game I'm covering. Let's do something useful
besides watching Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, which I
am deep into right now. I need an update on that.
I haven't seen anything since you told me to watch
the one that went to like got arrested and was like, yeah,
(07:33):
there's a lot happening. Okay, I don't know anything. I
need a recap there. It's so good, Like I don't
do that during the season because I just feel guilty
and I don't really have time. So now I'm full
blown in this is like when I'm doing my skincare
routine or I'm like plucking or whatever, I've got it
on in the bathroom, like it's making me happy, or
I'm purging or I'm trying to put stuff away. It's on,
(07:56):
Like it's on, I'm happy. But then to balance out
the trash and I'm not calling those women trash, but
let's you know, just like bing like yeah, reality tale,
it's reality television. Yeah. I was like, I want to
start reading this book. I need. I'm interested, and I
really love the vibe of let Them Now. I'm not
there yet. I only got like ten pages in and
(08:19):
that was her introduction about the five second what is
it method that she does, which I thought that was
fascinating because she for those of you that haven't joined
the phenomenon that is the let Them train, It's this
idea that she was getting. You know, she was unmotivated
and she was just like lying in bed and she
was had this theory that like a space shuttle, like
(08:39):
five four three two one, and just get yourself out
of bed, just propel yourself and so just something sit
as simple as that was sort of I think that
was her first book, right, that was her first book.
But then anyways, that idea of just you got to
start somewhere, and so that was something. But then the
let them theory is predicted on something that her son.
(09:02):
I think it touched about it. Anyways, I'll let you
guys read the book. You don't want me to tell
it because you're further than I am. Tell me what
you've gotten out of it so far and what's resonated
with you. What do you love? Yeah, I mean even
just that theory of not or the theory that don't
you can't control the things you can't control. So the
idea for her came about when her son was going
(09:23):
to homecoming and he didn't have a reservation for a
restaurant and her daughter was like, who cares if he
doesn't have a reservation, Like, let him deal with the
fact that he's going to get to the restaurant and
they're not going to be full. Or the cursage she
didn't get a carssage or whatever is it called curso
for the his date, or that he didn't have the
tucks or all these things, and like the mother wanted
to she wanted to control this, like we have to
get a touch, you have to get a reservation. You
(09:44):
haven't done that, like, oh my god. And so the
daughter's like just let him, let him fail and all
of these things. But ultimately, like he had a great
time and it didn't matter that he didn't have the reservation.
It didn't matter. So that theory applied to everyday life
is if you don't get invited to a bunch of
your girlfriends at a brunch and you didn't because you
on Instagram or whatever and you didn't get invited, instead
(10:05):
of being upset about it, you're like, well, just let
them like that was they wanted to go to brunch,
you weren't invited, Like, don't obsess about the things that
you can't control. Yeah, And so if somebody wants to
be in a bad mood, like if Steve, Steve doesn't
wake up at a bad But I'm just saying like, if
you know somebody's upset about something, you know, like let them,
(10:26):
Like that's their problem, it's not yours to take on.
So just that continuous ideas is sort of what and again,
what page am I know, I'm pretty pretty part I'm
on page No, I'm only on page forty one. I'm
on that part of let them a tool to implement wisdom.
But anyways, so my sister and my niece are both
(10:48):
reading this book as well, and I just I like,
I like that it's become something that everyone, not everyone,
but a lot of people are adapting and adopting because
it's clear that we all tried to meddle in things
that or control aspects of our life. And so if
this book has resonated with so many people, that means
(11:08):
that everyone needs to just fucking chill out a little bit,
you know. I mean, there's a reason that in this
book they talk about people have like are getting tattoos,
and what if my niece got a tattoo with this?
But just I don't know, I think hopefully, if there's
like this wave of people that are all operating with
a new intention of just being more chill, then maybe
(11:29):
it has a I don't know, maybe it has a
resounding effect somewhere. Maybe she's always something. I love how
she said. And again, I'm only ten pages in, but
she talked about how she was she was asked to
speak at something and she had a nineteen minute panic
attack throughout it, and then she blanked out and she
ended up talking about the five second method was something
she wasn't even going to discuss, and little did you know,
(11:52):
that was the beginning of Ted Talk, and she blew
the fuck up. That's amazing. And so what you think
in your own mind might be like your worst moment
could end up helping. But I think there's a lot
of that too in vulnerability. You and I and know
even when the therapy that I've been through in my life,
it was it's all about for me in particular, it's
(12:12):
been about vulnerability that the more vulnerable I've been, the better.
The more success I've had in relationships, the more success
I've had in friendships, the more success that I've just had,
even in work relationships where I've said to my boss
like I'm really sorry, or I got that wrong. That
one's on me. You know, like in basketball when someone
commits a turnover and they run back down the court
and they're like chap tap their chest like my bad
(12:34):
or you know, you see Baker Mayfield did it. I
saw him do in the playoff game and he fumbled
or something, and he was like sitting on the bench
and he kept going to his team. He's like, my bad,
like taking responsibility for your mistakes or your actions. I
think that there's also so much to be said about that,
but yeah, I'm excited. I'm glad that you're reading it too.
So let's maybe so we catch up and we can
(12:55):
do it together. Oh calm down. Book club, Yeah, I
would love that, andbody else that wants to jump on
board if you haven't already, let's just do it together.
I think it would be really fun and then something
we can discuss to that. I've always wanted to be
in a book club. My friends had a dirty book club,
but I just it started, like, you know, then going
(13:16):
into football, and I was like, listen, these clubs are
as dirty as they can be. You know, I just can't.
I've never read a dirty novel, although I did just
open up to chapter thirteen, which is very apropos how
to create the best friendships of your life cut Yeah yeah, no, no, no,
I'm just saying it was like that was a side
note on this thing, but yeah, jump on board. They
(13:37):
let them train I've never read a dirty novel? Did
you ever have to hide it? Like? Yeah, we talked
about this, like I was trying to keep up with
the book club. By the way, right now, what I'm doing,
I'm telling the book club story, but I'm also trying
to see what other books does old Mel Robbins have
because it's exciting. I letting them very five second one. Right,
(13:57):
that was for sure? We go Yeah the half did
Mel Robin on the podcast here and I know she's busy.
Take Control of your life was in twenty nineteen. The
high five is a journal, work it out the high
five five second rule and let them This is great.
I'm going to be a new mean watch out watch
Out world. Okay, so we're not going to get that
(14:28):
let them tattoos just because I already have too many
tattoos that I shouldn't have gotten. Not that this would
be bad, but anyways, but Aaron, you and I do
need to do a couple of things. We're going to
give ourselves an off season to do list a trip,
another earring. Also, we talked about it on the pregame.
Aaron and I are going to we don't know where yet,
we don't know what we're going to do. But we
(14:48):
have to do a vacation together in the off season.
You know what's crazy, though the off season is already over.
It's over. I mean we talk about I lost over.
I was like, we have to sit down and do
a schedule because every time I turn around in an email,
something's popping up and I'm like, wait, why is this already?
I'm the summer's gone. I don't like that feeling. I
(15:10):
don't like that feeling at all. So we have to
build in some stuff because if not, oh yeah, we're screwed.
I'm excited about like events and dates, but I hate
getting the email where it's like, hey, it's on this
date or it's something's on this date. No, I don't
want to do any dates. Like our nanny the other
day just said to me, when are you going out
(15:30):
of town? Again? When are you doing this? And I said,
I don't know, because I think it's like with football,
you are so it's such a routine. There's such a schedule.
I got on Thursday, I've got this feature Friday, I've
got the game on Sunday. I like acting like I
don't know what anything is. Now I know I've got
stuff coming up. We're going to Tampa together. We're going
to do on podcast at the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Women Summit.
(15:52):
Excited for that, yep, hearing rumors about who may stop buy,
which could be super fun and a time. By the way,
But I like acting like I'm loosey goosey right now
and I don't have a schedule. But summer's over. Off
season is over. Yeah, it's already done, do you Because
when I'm here at the ranch, I am well, I
(16:14):
just billed half mine. I am very It's so I
don't know if you're like this. I like doing things
here that I don't like doing at home, emptying the dishwasher,
doing laundry, like okay, I was wondering if you had
that same thing, Like I wake up here early, like
(16:34):
i'm here like, well, I guess the same kind of
time in LA between six thirty seven's like late, get up,
I feed the animals. I have my own little routine there.
I make my coffee, I go for a walk with
the dogs up to this one little area that I like.
And then I like doing the tasks that I hate
doing at home, like all the homemaker stuff. I make
cookies the other day, Like I don't make fucking cookies
(16:56):
at home, Like what I know. I'm such a like
homemaker here. And as I was folding tells this morning,
I thought to myself, like, I could totally be a
stay at home mom. I don't have any kids, but
like I thought to myself, like I could do that.
I probably couldn't because I'd be bored after like five seconds.
But I don't know. I just have this like maternal
thing is I don't know. I don't know. Like I
(17:16):
meet the bed because Jen was here, so I like
she She's like wanting to strip the bed. I was like,
oh no, I'll do it. I made the bed all
not all these things. And I'm like, I hate doing
I don't. I don't like doing any of that shit
when I'm home. I wonder why. I like, maybe because
we're not in our normal routine and so it just
feels like we have the time to do it. I
don't know, but I kind of liked it because you
(17:38):
don't look at the ranch as like a place where
you know, we're at home, and it's like I got
this closet and I got to weed out. It's like
all my Fox, shit's in there, all my rein gear,
all the craft. It's like, that's still ranch is still
kind of your vaca, your vacation. Yeah, and maybe that's
the way. I don't know, but I just thought to
(17:59):
myself and not like the stay at home but you
know what I'm saying, Like where it was like I
liked being a little homemaker and I liked, like, I
don't even like cooking. And I said Steve last night,
do you want me to make you dinner? And he was like,
are you okay? And I was like, well, what going
to make? Well? I only make three things. I can
only make three things taco, salads, spaghetti, and then like
breakfast for dinner. That's the extent of my cooking. I
(18:21):
don't have any And always there's this girl, Aaron O'Brien
that I follow on Instagram. She is amazing. She does
all of these like quick recipes. I have never made
one of her recipes, but I go in a deep
day of watching them. You have Yeah, I forgot what
it was. I made one of her recipes one time.
You told me about her, so I tried. She makes
one to try so easy wine. Don't this is any
(18:45):
measuring cops. What the hell, No, they don't. And that's
the thing where I'm like, I want to be that person,
and so maybe I'm I don't know, I don't know.
Should I try other than reading? Reading? Other than reading?
What else we do? I think we should have a
checklist for our quote off season, even though we already
(19:05):
say it's over, but before football season starts again. I
think it's important and for anybody else out there, we'd
love some advice, like things that we should do, we
should finish. Obviously, that's embarrassing if we can't finish one book.
So we got to finish this book. Yeah, we'll finish
it like cook once a week. Like, let's think about
our list. Definitely the vacation, we need to clean out
(19:27):
our closets, our purses, all that stuff. Yeah, and then
we need to do something volunteer wise. I don't know.
I'm coming up with a lot of ideas. But then
I think we'll feel very like accomplished by the time
the season rolls around again, and we won't be mad like,
oh my god, the whole off season went by and
we didn't do anything that was a real mel Robins thing.
I think I sent that to you like, do a checklist,
like if you are starting on Sunday night to have
(19:51):
anxiety for the week ahead, like think of the things
you need to get done and write them down. But
I have list, so sister, but I am not. I
have so many lests. Another thing that you sent me
was Kate Winslet. Yeah, had spoke to me. Okay, so
do you explain what it was because I don't know
(20:14):
who did this. I don't know if you were able
to put that together the voices behind it. But there
was some interview that somebody did. It looked recently with
Kate Winslet and they went back and looked at I
don't know if it was like a fashion kind of
show of her. She was on a red carpet and
it must have been promoting Titanic, and they were speaking
(20:37):
about how they thought her dress size was a little
too small for her body and they played that in
front of her, and the interviewer was asking if she
ever confronted the people that said the nasty things about her,
and she said she did, and the interviewer asked what
she said to them, and she said, I hope that
(21:00):
haunts you. And that just spoke to me mmm hmmm,
And I was like, the girl, look at this because
which by the way, let me tell you, working at Fox,
they have this archive, like you can see some of
the amazing costumes from different movies and shows and all
(21:21):
this kind of stuff. Kate Winslet's dressed the famed dress.
Where was the black with the maroon like underlay and
it had the beads. It was like the first one
I think that you see that she's in from like
the dinner the night that like Leo's there, this dress,
the waiste size on it is like this big. It
(21:42):
is so tiny. So the fact that she was fat
shamed at all is fucking insane, like and it's I know,
it's you know, so many conversations about unrealistic expectations for
women and their bodies and the whole thing. But as
it pertained to this, that quote of saying I hope
it haunts them, I think there's a little bit again
(22:03):
this reoccurring theme where let them if they want to
say something about you, if they want to fact shame you,
or if they want to say you're not this, or
they want to let them that's on them, and I
hope it haunts them. I hope they have to live
with that thing instead of letting it be a problem
for her or having her feel bad about it, like, no,
(22:24):
that's their shit, not mine. Like I like that projection
of not projection, but like pushing off of internalizing it,
like just no, get you get to live with the
fact that you're an asshole, like that's your problem, not mine,
because we know somewhere it's like instead of absorbing that
and letting it be something we lose sleep at at
(22:45):
night over people that have you know. And by the way,
I'm not a saint, but I definitely know a few people.
I hope it haunts them. Wait they act you know
what I mean? So that's great. We love Kate Winslet
we love to summarize. But yeah, we're real girls girls,
you know. Yeah. But all that is good. We have
(23:08):
a lot to be thankful for. We have a lot
of exciting things coming up. We're going to make a
list of all the stuff that we wanted to do. Well,
hold on, how's your re entry going? Can we get enough?
Because you were upset about somebody in their loud talking.
(23:31):
How are you guys doing? Where are you with re entry? Better?
Because even in taking my own advice of our is
we posted and when our clips came out, when I'm
like hearing myself, I don't want to be bitchy. I
don't want to be controlling. Steve is so wonderful to me,
especially during the off seats or during the season, and
(23:53):
just taking care of shit at home. So re entry
is going better because I'm putting it on myself to
be more mature about some stuff. Some stuff's good. English's
like English. I'm trying to be better with English stuff.
But also I think it's just being honest about like
(24:15):
I because we're together all the time, you guys are,
and it's fine because I like him, but like up here,
like we're in the middle of nowhere, so it's not
like we're even like going into town and like hanging
out with you know, the people. Like it's just last night,
I was just like looking, He's sent me a text.
I was out doing somebody. He goes, hey, do you
want to come back to the house, And we just
(24:35):
sit at each other, sit on the couch and stare
at each other. That's the text I got. I go, sure,
I'll be down in twenty minutes. We sat on the
couch and it was actually really nice. Steve doesn't like TV,
doesn't not into watching TV. He doesn't share. I always
know that if this guy would have TV's taken out
of his house, if it wasn't for sports. That's the
(24:56):
only thing he likes to watch. Every time he goes, oh,
what are we going to watch? Another? D Dateline? Season
forty two, episode seven. I love Dateline? He goes, Oh, murder,
kill kill. All you want to watch is murder? He goes,
can we watch a comedy? But yeah, he is not
a TV person. I will catch him sitting in a
room listening to Art Pepper, this like jazz musician, and
(25:17):
just staring at the ceiling and I'm like, huh, I
go what does that do to you? And he goes
helps me relax? He goes TV I just like get
inundated and gives me anxiety about like killing and murder.
And I was like, really, because killing and murder makes
me relax because now I don't have to think about
all the things I'm supposed to be doing. I just
think about how great my life is because it's not
that so I don't know it's going good. We just
(25:40):
have to like balance out. I just I miss you.
I think I need a little airon too. Well. Yeah,
I can't get a hold of this chick. She's watching
Dayline and feeding the cows. Where are my friend? So busy?
So it's been two weeks actually, so yeah, I'm ready
to see my girlfriend. Hopefully we get together this weekend.
(26:01):
And I miss Mac. I haven't seen mag what's Mac
been up to? He's busy, fifteen years old. I see
the picture of him and Justin Bieber, which, by the way,
he looks like Justin Bieber. Yeah, and somebody actually said
that to me before I forgot who did. I think
it was somebody at the super Bowl. It was like,
your kid looks like Justin Bieber. I was like really,
(26:22):
And so he's he is cute. He was so good
at that La Strong event we brought him. They were
so loosey goosey about letting him in the locker room.
He was hanging out with dad. Dad was sending me skates.
I know those are the Copauitar's sons. Yakub skates is
so sweet and Jared was like skating with him on
the ice and he loves going fast. That was really fun.
(26:45):
He's good, he's busy, he all right, let's talk about it.
What do we get talk about it? I get it.
He's nineteen months. This is where I am in my life.
We had our babies late. With our baby late, I
was around a lot of people that were having babies
for many years, and I was sitting back and observing.
(27:09):
I went on a lot of family vacations with people
that had kids. I was all my friends from the
La Kings at the time had babies. So I got
to observe a lot of stuff. I realized what I
really liked and what I didn't like. And what I
don't like are kids that have free rein and that
aren't well behaved. What I do like is somebody like
(27:30):
Greg Olsen who has children that walk in, look you
in the eye, shake your hand, and is very are
very respectable. Now I've gone to dinner with Greg and
I've sat next to both of his kids, and Greg
is trying to talk to me and he has said, hey,
it's adult time. Now. I love it. Like listen, no
kid is a saint, No adult is a saint. But
(27:50):
I realize what I want out of a kid. I'm
also having a big struggle of when you learn to
I'm not say discipline, but rack oh yeah, okay. We
went to sushi the other night Jared had to work,
and I love our nanny and she's so great, and
I said, hey, can I take you to sushi tonight?
(28:13):
And twofold can Matt come too? And I think it's
so important to socialize him, and you know, I want
him to sit down and have a meal with me. Now.
Are there times he needs an iPad? Sure, but I
also really get a kick of the fact she's great
to show him you don't need it, and we never
had that. We went to dinner with our parents and
I never had that. Yeah, here's a coloring book and
(28:35):
color crans from the hostess exactly. The one thing I
love about our nanny, Barbara is she is really great
in teaching me how to do things. She is like, Okay,
let's do it this way, let's try it this way,
And so I feel confident and comfortable because I also
have a huge insecurity that I haven't been around for
six months and I want to do it how they've
done it, so I don't mess up the schedule any
(28:57):
whot nanny, my man is not talking yet, but we
are saying something dad, my momm okay, great. He is
so smart. He is very attentive, but we have not
figured out how to lower our voice yet, and we
have stayed while they are related out of nowhere. At Izakaya,
(29:24):
which is a very small sushi restaurant in our town,
one of our favorites. He wasn't pissed, he wasn't happy.
He was just in four loud shrieks where the entire
restaurant turned and looked at me. His father is not there,
and I'm mortified. And I looked at Barbara and I go,
(29:46):
what do we do? What do we do? What do
we do? She goes, it's okay, you're okay, Matt. We
do not yell at the restaurant. We're good. It was
that at the end of the meal, he had had
such a great meal, we gave him ice. But then
in the back of my head, I'm like, am I rougar? Oh?
What am I doing? Because Barbara had said to me
(30:07):
he did that at the park. Everybody turned and looked,
and she said, We're not doing that. We're going to
behave I went home that night and I texted one
of my girlfriends who has kids, and I just said,
at what point. I don't even know if I can
look at him the same after that, because everybody looked
and I was like, what point of I'm like, no,
(30:29):
I wanted to grab him run out, and she's like,
he's nineteen months. He's understand. That's just where I am
right now. I know what I want out of a kid,
and I don't know when to start. She said, you know,
you have to say like, hey, let's not do this.
We're in a place, but he doesn't know what the
help but he does, but he doesn't. Yeah, okay, look
(30:50):
I will step in here only to say this. I
obviously I don't have children. I did grow up. My
mom did daycare for us when we were growing up
because you wanted to stay home with us, and it
was a way for her to make money. So I
was always around kids. I was a nanny. I started
watching it an eleven nine month old when I was
eleven years old, and then stayed with that family until
I graduated high school. Shout out to the Luhamburgers, and
(31:12):
they had three kids, and I would go on vacation
with them and I was the one that would travel
and I was responsible for, you know, when they wanted
to go out to dinner, I was with the kids
and all that kind of stuff. The only thing I
will say about that is like distraction right where it's
And again I'm not the professional nanny that you have,
so I will only say from my own experience, is
that same reason for kids on airplanes. I feel for them.
(31:34):
They don't know what they're doing, their ears are popping,
it feels weird. They're in a confined space, and it's
like they want to move. Especially he's at an age
where it's like he wants to move, he wants to
do things, and so it's like busy. I don't know
about the yelling part, but like that's just more of like, okay,
we don't do that. But like I always feel for
kids when they're like in a situation and they just
want constant distraction, Like take the credit cards out of
(31:56):
your wallet to give them something to do. Here's a
color cran, here's a oh my god, do you see
a bird outside? Like just constantly like give them something
else to do so that they're not like I'm trapped
in this high chair or whatever. Again, I'm not speaking
to that situation that you have. I'm only thinking about
the things that I do with kids. And that's the
part too, where it's like you have went forty to
(32:20):
forty five years without having a child, and now your whole.
I'm so proud of you though, like no one prepares
you for that. Your whole, like your whole and your
whole work. But here I'm gonna say this, and I
don't have an interjection. You guys, Aaron may sit on
here and she's vulnerable about the things that she doesn't
(32:41):
know and all that kind of stuff. She is the
most amazing mom. You will show me pictures of him
sleeping in his crip, will look at the little monitor,
and you'll show me the pain. You are such a
good mother, and I'm really proud of you, like no
one prepares you for how to do that. But I
know that this is like you imagine, you wanted this
for so long and now you have this perfect little boy.
(33:02):
And so if he screams at the restaurant, yeah whatever,
it's true. I was actually thinking of this the other
day and I said this to Jarrett. And I'm very
very also grateful for our help that we have and
we have such a good team in place, and we
are so thankful because whatever, but we are so grateful
for our group. But because it does take a village.
(33:24):
The other day when we got home from Montana, we're back,
We're in our Routineer goes to the office. I was,
you know, with him for a bit. Then I went
to work out, and I was saying to Jarrett, my god,
this is how it's supposed to be. We have such
a lovely like team working with us. But this is
how it is when you don't aren't working and you're
not traveling to Green Bay, or you're not worried about
(33:47):
getting on a conference call. Like I will say this
and not to toot my own horn, it's fucking hard to
do this for a full time job and traveling and
not even traveling like I think of all the football
stories we read where guys talk about their mom and
how they had three to four jobs and they didn't
see their mom during the day and then at night
the mom went to work while they went to bed,
and my mom would go exactly like that is fucking hard.
(34:10):
Like And I'm not saying I didn't give myself enough credit,
but I sat there the last six months thinking about
what a failure I was because I was like God,
I'm like half asking it with foxing, though I wasn't
half asking it with my kid. It is so hard
to do all that. I will sit and I try
to remind you of this. My mom worked three jobs,
(34:31):
my dad was working all the time, like all of
this stuff. And there's never a time, ever, ever, a
time where I look back at my childhood and I
was like, oh, I wasn't loved. All I think about
was I was loved, and my parents were working so
hard so I could have that extra They could make
a hundred oll My mom would make a hundred dollars
at the restaurant, working at a restaurant night so I
(34:52):
could go join the select basketball team where I could
get the new basketball shoes. Like you have to give
yourself the credit, like your kid sitting in that high
chair watching you do that postgame interview and pointing at
the screen and saying, Mama, like I like cried watching
that video. And it's not even my kid. It's just
the fact that like he he sees you working like
that is a beautiful thing. And by the way, if
(35:15):
you don't work, if you stay at home with your
kid all day, that's almost the joy. The hardest job.
I imagine that's the everest job is everybody always says
is the hardest job in the world because it's constant.
So I think all of this is about giving yourself
grace and knowing Like when you got Howie as a puppy,
he would dig, he would chew on things, whatever. How
he's grown up and he's a great dog like mas
(35:38):
a baby, he's like gonna try things until But I'm
really really proud of you and I hope that you're
seeing like instead of instead of focusing on the like,
oh I'm not this or I'm not that, like, I
really hope you give yourself the like this is a
whole different set of you know, things in life that
no one prepares you for and even if you've been
very vocal, you're lucky enough to have help and it's
(36:00):
so really hard. Yeah, yeah, I I love you. Answers
you know, you know went in out. So this in
to summarize. Mel Robbins, we would love for you to
come on the Calm Down Podcast us like you're now
innumerable amount of fans appreciate that you have the vulnerability
(36:20):
to put this down writing so you can help all
of us be better people and just less stressed out
or less you know, upset about things that don't matter
and that we can't control. I'm going to go look
for a new recipe to cook and fold some more
laundry because this is the things I like to do now.
And I love you and I'm going to see you
this weekend. I can't wait to view. Yeah, let's figure
(36:41):
that out. How they tacked? Yep. Okay, you guys, thank
you for listening way in and buy the book if
you haven't already, because we're going to continue to talk
about it. Play along you. Calm Down with Aaron and
Carissa is a production of iHeart Radio. For more podcasts
from iHeart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, app podcast, or
wherever you get your podcasts. M hmm
Hosts And Creators
Erin Andrews
Charissa Thompson
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