July 10, 2024 • 16 mins
Our anonymous guest reveals the shocking conclusion to her office romance and ultimate betrayl. The conversation highlights the need to listen to intuition and the role of external signs in revealing the truth. The importance of not blaming the messenger and taking accountability for one's choices.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
My stomach sank and everything stopped for a moment, and
I thought, I'm either gonna die or I'm going to
kill somebody.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
She's a woman with strategies.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Welcome to cheaters and backstabbers. I'm Shoddy Diaz, New York
City stand up comedian, and we love a good cheating story,
especially when I can share it with my girl, Kate.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Thank you, my friend.
Speaker 4 (00:29):
I am Kate Robarts, And we are back to hear
more about the juicy stories from one of the worst
cheater stories I've ever heard. It's scandalous, and today we're
here for part two of a crazy wild story.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
So here with part two, you guys are gonna hear
where we left off. She was explaining that she found
out that her man was cheating through the eyes or
the voice of her. And this was at a corporate party, y'all.
This was buttoned up. Everyone was just like on their
p's and q's. But you know, can you imagine I
(01:08):
can't imagine if.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
It were me.
Speaker 4 (01:10):
I don't care how corporate it is. I would have
smashed plates. I would have unbuttoned some buttons, taken off.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
The ear right right.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
You know that some basoline called hr because I'm about
to go buck wild in here, right, But I'm from Texas.
You know, we don't really affect it's there for I'm kidding. Yeah,
I know, you're right, everybody, I'm cheating out there.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Taking back to that moment when you heard your insertancy
her mother is friends with your man's girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
My stomach sank and everything stopped for a moment, and
I thought, I'm either going to die.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Or I'm going to kill somebody. So that's that moment
that you go.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
You know, you have like angel over here, Devil over here,
and they're both telling you, hey, whatever you do is
cool because it.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
Deserves the situation.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
But I did see a few years ahead me in
a jail cell and I didn't like that image.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Not cute. No, no, it's not cute. And I had
my prayer and sued on.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
So instead what I did was I grabbed my Gucci
purse off the table that was say that Gucci. I
flipped my head bag, I listed my nails, flipped my
hair bag. Just to quote a few other artists out there,
we'd love to have him on the show.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
We have to have I'm sure you would.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
And I grabbed my purse and I went around beating
with it.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
It was my Gucci bag. There were all those moments.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
I go back to that moment, and I wish I
had right there just hit him with the purse, pull
his hair, just wrestle him down to the ground and
beat his eyes.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
But I didn't do that because I was composed.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
I was a lady, and I took my bag and
I went around to him, and I said, you have
exactly two seconds to make it to that BMW that
you have in the parking lot.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
And so in my head, I.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Was channeling Angela Bassett and I was watching waiting Sam
to exhale.
Speaker 5 (03:12):
She was his lover and his secretary. No, that's also
showing my age. Okay, never mind working hear the song
from the movies. And she didn't send his car on fire?
Did you go like and with all of his clothes?
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Like? Did you go to his apartment?
Speaker 6 (03:24):
I get his clothes? Did you?
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Full on? I had to did it in part right?
So I went to the parking She's a woman with strategy.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Yes, definitely. I so fast forward. I don't have to
tell you because it went something like that, right, And
I go back and composed myself straighten on my clothes.
I go back to the table where everyone in the
table was staring at me, like, oh, it just happened.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
So I write my phone.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Number down and I give it to the young lady
and I say, can you please give this to your
mom's friend and tell it.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
Give me a call? And that was it.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
He was parnew He didn't know what was going to happen.
And that was the reveal. That was the big reveal.
Speaker 6 (04:09):
How did that make you feel like after that night?
Speaker 2 (04:11):
Like what did you.
Speaker 6 (04:12):
Feel driving home or driving to wherever you were going
to go?
Speaker 1 (04:16):
I was devastated because as a person who had I
keep saying educated because I think sometimes we think that
education and work can somehow protect you or seal you
from betrayal and relationship.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
I know that's dumb. I know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
It's stupid because everyone experiences this. But you think because
you're being intellectual about the relationship and you're giving the
person the benefit of the doubt, and you're giving the
person some sort of runway to be honest, because I
always said, if you don't want to be here, you
(04:57):
just got to go. Yeah, you don't have to stay
and betray me you can just go. I'm not gonna
hold you accountable. We're not married, we don't have to
stay here. It's okay for you to go.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
So for a person to stay.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
And then to stay in something else, that's where I
felt the betrayal. That I felt like I was above
it all.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
And I really do think I should have taken my aunt.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Advice and just drive up there and find out for
myself what was actually going on. And he was his
his woman lived next door, so of course he was
next door. He wasn't quite where he said he was,
and so but for me, it was a moment of reflection.
(05:38):
It was a moment of anger, it was a moment
of wanting to kill somebody. But I also knew I
wasn't going to go there because I didn't want to
just sort of go to that level with him.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
He wasn't worth It wasn't worth me given up everything
I had worked for. He just wasn't worth my time.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
And I think we have to change this conversation about
cheaters to be about feeling like a victim.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
I was never feeling like a victim.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
I was in that relationship because I wanted to be
and I was in that relationship as long as I
wanted to be, and I could leave when I want to.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
And this was a moment.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Where if I was refusing to see the signs along
the way, I finally had to face the truth that
there were signs. When I look back, there were so
many signs. But it was working for me right because
I was building something and I had the freedom that
I wanted to have, and I had the relationship that
I wanted to have, and.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
So it just to fit my lifestyle. So I'm owning that, right.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
I'm owning the responsibility for staying. But I'm also owning
that moment.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
That I left.
Speaker 6 (06:45):
That's so badass of you.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
I love that for you.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Now, I do have a question about like when your
aunt asked you, who like driven by his house?
Speaker 6 (06:56):
So, how much time went by before you found out?
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Right, because I feel like that's planting the sea.
Speaker 7 (07:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (07:03):
I was like, oh, could something be a miss?
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Yeah? I think maybe a couple months.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
Again, busy doing things, the conference was coming up, working
on that.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
You know, And after d C, after the.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Big conference and the big reveal, I felt like, Okay,
it's all open. I can date, I can go out
with people, you know, and I have plenty of people
interested in dating me, and I yes. I called back
and I said, sure, I'll go out with you, because
at that point I felt like, why was I being loyal.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
And he wasn't, And things in fact got worse after DC.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
We came back, and when he saw that I had
choices and that I was dating other people, he said,
you know, I took a trip and I reflected on
a relationship and I realized, do.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
You want me to marry you? Fine, I'll marry you.
And I was like, ho up, wait a minute. That
is not my romance story.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Is not what I'm going to tell my children one
day that my man said.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
And I'll marry you.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
No, that is not getting on your knees and writing
my name in the sky and asking me the proper way.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
So, no, thank you, Look what you've already done.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
What do you think I'm going to get married to
somebody who already disrespected.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Me in that way? And it didn't matter how in
love I was. It had to.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Do with me honoring myself and knowing that I deserved better,
and that as painful as it was to leave him,
that it was more painful to stay and not honor
what I was feeling.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
So I took that time to keel.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
I took that time to really understand what I was
looking for in a relationship and to really honor myself.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Right. And so the young woman did get the phone.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Number and she did call me. And when she called,
I realized that I'm a woman oriented woman. And what
I mean by that is that I believe in helping
a sister. Right. I wasn't going to backstab. I was
not trying to fight. I wasn't trying to do any
of that. Right, if you want them, you can have them.
I'm going to cut up.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
A few of his suits.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
I'm going to put him in a bag, and I'm
going to take him to your house. That's the way
we're going to handle this. And so she sent me flowers.
She was like, you're so nice, and she sent me flowers.
And I had a friend, my Cuban friend that is
always with me, and she was just like, I wouldn't
do it shows flowers if I was you.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
You don't even know what kind of stuff.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
She put flower wen he could be allergic.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
I was like, oh, this is sweet, Like, no, thanks,
I have enough friends. I don't really need more friends.
I don't my friend took the flowers and ducked him
in the trush. And so she called me a few weeks.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Later time when and I was again trying to heal myself,
and she called me and she said.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
You know, I haven't seen him in a few weeks.
Is he there? And I'm going, why are you alone?
You are not my friend? Why this is not my
problem anymore? But I haven't seen him in Weeksit I
missed my period this month. Bro, they always do.
Speaker 6 (10:17):
Everyone gets pregnant.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
At the end. Why did she she purposely? Yeah, that's
actually a very sad she got pregnant.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
So I said, oh my god, but wait, she didn't
get pregnant by herself, so clearly there was stuff.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Going on, and so I was devastated.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
So I experienced the betrayal again, right, but experience it
in so many different ways.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
So there were so many moments at that point.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
And so that's the point that I said, get out
of my life in a very bad tone, get out
of my life.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
And I never want to see you again.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
And do you know that I have never seen this
person again. And when I say never, I mean we're
in the same circles, we have similar friends, we're in
the same industry.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
And I've never seen this person again.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
The reason and the way that I survived this was
in understanding that I had to honor myself and that
I deserve someone that wanted to be with me, that
wanted to know my family, that wanted to hold my
hand walking down the street.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
He never wanted those things.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
And so if I was just the booty call, then
maybe it took me six years to figure that out.
Speaker 8 (11:25):
What you call we should promote toy. She should be
giving tips on actually, how do I become a six
years a podcast?
Speaker 7 (11:39):
Actually you need to build him he owes you reparations,
there's some kind of yeah, let's vendo request six years
six years.
Speaker 6 (11:51):
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for sharing that.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
That was crazy. Yeah, well, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
And I don't know how you guys feel like this
can help listeners, but thank you for allowing me to
share my story and for hopefully reminding somebody that if
your auntie tells you to drive by that house, you
better listen to your eat because they've been here longer
and they know how this works.
Speaker 6 (12:18):
Yeah, I agree, and I'm already proud of you.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
I'm happy, you know, look at where you are now,
and I'm happy that you honor yourself till this day.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Like it's an.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Ongoing thing, and I know that he Lee is with
linear and it probably comes in ways, but I'm happy
that you can share the story now without like crying
about it. Now we could laugh about it and like
joke about it, you know, And I think that's the
best way to teach.
Speaker 6 (12:41):
Other people who are going through it at the moment.
So who does see you. I'm happy for.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
You, thank you, And there's no like I love it.
Speaker 5 (12:48):
It's like six years, like there's there's no amount of
time that's too long and too short, because you know,
people who've been their whole life. Somebody dies and then
you find out they had a whole o their family
or whatever. But it's like there's no time stamp on
treachery and we hear those stories.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
And you think it's never gonna happen to me. I'm
too smart. I know the signs.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
And you can't be too smart, too educated, too uneducated,
too like down from down round the way, wherever your
background is, there's betrayal and you're not the victim, right
I think at some point you realize I was there,
I participated in that relationship. I refused to see the
(13:30):
signs and I stayed. So there's some accountability that comes
from that as well.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
But yes, healing.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Comes with time, a sister and my brothers, you know,
because there's it goes both ways. I think a lot
of times we think this is a female story, but
this is a people story.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
And something else.
Speaker 5 (13:48):
I love about your stories that you didn't blame the messenger,
because I feel like so often in these stories, you know,
like the little intern that ended up spilling the beans, right,
how was that relationship?
Speaker 2 (13:59):
What was that relationship of Like that was fine.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
She was a young girl, had absolutely no idea what
she just said to me.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
She had absolutely no idea. So she was used by
the universe to give me another message.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
I was just about to say that, because you know,
I always say, whatever come, whatever you do in the dark,
unt always comes out in my life, always happens, and
I feel like the universe has send you people.
Speaker 6 (14:21):
First, it was your aunt that didn't work. You didn't
go to this house, wasn't bold enough?
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Yeah yeah, But then this girl was like, all right,
then this is what it is instead of you going
to look.
Speaker 6 (14:33):
For it, it came to you. So it usually it
usually is like that.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
And you know, it's good to have those type of
people in your life that.
Speaker 6 (14:42):
Are probably gonna like shine light.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
You know.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Wait, you have to act. You have to act at
some point. You have to act or you choose to stay.
And there are people who choose to stay. Yeah, and
I know you either have to act.
Speaker 5 (14:55):
Like I don't know what this is, I don't believe
what happened, or yeah. I mean one of my takeaways
is that I need a Gucci purse because that can
help me in troubling.
Speaker 6 (15:07):
Times and I can go on.
Speaker 5 (15:09):
I will be able to move on a little better
if I have that bag. Yeah, but thank you for
sharing that beautiful story. And you didn't even need alcohol,
Like wow, No, that means that she's really healed, she's.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Good, she really ready to go.
Speaker 5 (15:26):
This is really why I say never ever get involved
with someone you work at. This is why I say
never get involved with someone you work with.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Absolutely and also make sure you listen to your thet
all the time.
Speaker 6 (15:41):
She knows best.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
I'm a thief.
Speaker 6 (15:43):
I tell my nieces all the time what to do.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
They don't listen to me, but one day they're gonna
look back and be like, you know what, I should
have drove right by.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
That guy's house.
Speaker 6 (15:53):
Moral of the story, listen to your thet H.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Thanks so much for listening everyone.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
I'm Kate Robo, I'm Shy Ideas, and we'll be back
next time for another episode of Cheaters and Backstabbers
My stomach sank and everything stopped for a moment, and
I thought, I'm either gonna die or I'm going to
kill somebody.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
She's a woman with strategies.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Welcome to cheaters and backstabbers. I'm Shoddy Diaz, New York
City stand up comedian, and we love a good cheating story,
especially when I can share it with my girl, Kate.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Thank you, my friend.
Speaker 4 (00:29):
I am Kate Robarts, And we are back to hear
more about the juicy stories from one of the worst
cheater stories I've ever heard. It's scandalous, and today we're
here for part two of a crazy wild story.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
So here with part two, you guys are gonna hear
where we left off. She was explaining that she found
out that her man was cheating through the eyes or
the voice of her. And this was at a corporate party, y'all.
This was buttoned up. Everyone was just like on their
p's and q's. But you know, can you imagine I
(01:08):
can't imagine if.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
It were me.
Speaker 4 (01:10):
I don't care how corporate it is. I would have
smashed plates. I would have unbuttoned some buttons, taken off.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
The ear right right.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
You know that some basoline called hr because I'm about
to go buck wild in here, right, But I'm from Texas.
You know, we don't really affect it's there for I'm kidding. Yeah,
I know, you're right, everybody, I'm cheating out there.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Taking back to that moment when you heard your insertancy
her mother is friends with your man's girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
My stomach sank and everything stopped for a moment, and
I thought, I'm either going to die.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Or I'm going to kill somebody. So that's that moment
that you go.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
You know, you have like angel over here, Devil over here,
and they're both telling you, hey, whatever you do is
cool because it.
Speaker 2 (02:02):
Deserves the situation.
Speaker 1 (02:04):
But I did see a few years ahead me in
a jail cell and I didn't like that image.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Not cute. No, no, it's not cute. And I had
my prayer and sued on.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
So instead what I did was I grabbed my Gucci
purse off the table that was say that Gucci. I
flipped my head bag, I listed my nails, flipped my
hair bag. Just to quote a few other artists out there,
we'd love to have him on the show.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
We have to have I'm sure you would.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
And I grabbed my purse and I went around beating
with it.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
It was my Gucci bag. There were all those moments.
Speaker 1 (02:40):
I go back to that moment, and I wish I
had right there just hit him with the purse, pull
his hair, just wrestle him down to the ground and
beat his eyes.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
But I didn't do that because I was composed.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
I was a lady, and I took my bag and
I went around to him, and I said, you have
exactly two seconds to make it to that BMW that
you have in the parking lot.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
And so in my head, I.
Speaker 1 (03:04):
Was channeling Angela Bassett and I was watching waiting Sam
to exhale.
Speaker 5 (03:12):
She was his lover and his secretary. No, that's also
showing my age. Okay, never mind working hear the song
from the movies. And she didn't send his car on fire?
Did you go like and with all of his clothes?
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Like? Did you go to his apartment?
Speaker 6 (03:24):
I get his clothes? Did you?
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Full on? I had to did it in part right?
So I went to the parking She's a woman with strategy.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Yes, definitely. I so fast forward. I don't have to
tell you because it went something like that, right, And
I go back and composed myself straighten on my clothes.
I go back to the table where everyone in the
table was staring at me, like, oh, it just happened.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
So I write my phone.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Number down and I give it to the young lady
and I say, can you please give this to your
mom's friend and tell it.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
Give me a call? And that was it.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
He was parnew He didn't know what was going to happen.
And that was the reveal. That was the big reveal.
Speaker 6 (04:09):
How did that make you feel like after that night?
Speaker 2 (04:11):
Like what did you.
Speaker 6 (04:12):
Feel driving home or driving to wherever you were going
to go?
Speaker 1 (04:16):
I was devastated because as a person who had I
keep saying educated because I think sometimes we think that
education and work can somehow protect you or seal you
from betrayal and relationship.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
I know that's dumb. I know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
It's stupid because everyone experiences this. But you think because
you're being intellectual about the relationship and you're giving the
person the benefit of the doubt, and you're giving the
person some sort of runway to be honest, because I
always said, if you don't want to be here, you
(04:57):
just got to go. Yeah, you don't have to stay
and betray me you can just go. I'm not gonna
hold you accountable. We're not married, we don't have to
stay here. It's okay for you to go.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
So for a person to stay.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
And then to stay in something else, that's where I
felt the betrayal. That I felt like I was above
it all.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
And I really do think I should have taken my aunt.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
Advice and just drive up there and find out for
myself what was actually going on. And he was his
his woman lived next door, so of course he was
next door. He wasn't quite where he said he was,
and so but for me, it was a moment of reflection.
(05:38):
It was a moment of anger, it was a moment
of wanting to kill somebody. But I also knew I
wasn't going to go there because I didn't want to
just sort of go to that level with him.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
He wasn't worth It wasn't worth me given up everything
I had worked for. He just wasn't worth my time.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
And I think we have to change this conversation about
cheaters to be about feeling like a victim.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
I was never feeling like a victim.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
I was in that relationship because I wanted to be
and I was in that relationship as long as I
wanted to be, and I could leave when I want to.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
And this was a moment.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
Where if I was refusing to see the signs along
the way, I finally had to face the truth that
there were signs. When I look back, there were so
many signs. But it was working for me right because
I was building something and I had the freedom that
I wanted to have, and I had the relationship that
I wanted to have, and.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
So it just to fit my lifestyle. So I'm owning that, right.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
I'm owning the responsibility for staying. But I'm also owning
that moment.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
That I left.
Speaker 6 (06:45):
That's so badass of you.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
I love that for you.
Speaker 3 (06:48):
Now, I do have a question about like when your
aunt asked you, who like driven by his house?
Speaker 6 (06:56):
So, how much time went by before you found out?
Speaker 2 (07:01):
Right, because I feel like that's planting the sea.
Speaker 7 (07:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (07:03):
I was like, oh, could something be a miss?
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Yeah? I think maybe a couple months.
Speaker 1 (07:09):
Again, busy doing things, the conference was coming up, working
on that.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
You know, And after d C, after the.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Big conference and the big reveal, I felt like, Okay,
it's all open. I can date, I can go out
with people, you know, and I have plenty of people
interested in dating me, and I yes. I called back
and I said, sure, I'll go out with you, because
at that point I felt like, why was I being loyal.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
And he wasn't, And things in fact got worse after DC.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
We came back, and when he saw that I had
choices and that I was dating other people, he said,
you know, I took a trip and I reflected on
a relationship and I realized, do.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
You want me to marry you? Fine, I'll marry you.
And I was like, ho up, wait a minute. That
is not my romance story.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
Is not what I'm going to tell my children one
day that my man said.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
And I'll marry you.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
No, that is not getting on your knees and writing
my name in the sky and asking me the proper way.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
So, no, thank you, Look what you've already done.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
What do you think I'm going to get married to
somebody who already disrespected.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Me in that way? And it didn't matter how in
love I was. It had to.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Do with me honoring myself and knowing that I deserved better,
and that as painful as it was to leave him,
that it was more painful to stay and not honor
what I was feeling.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
So I took that time to keel.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
I took that time to really understand what I was
looking for in a relationship and to really honor myself.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Right. And so the young woman did get the phone.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Number and she did call me. And when she called,
I realized that I'm a woman oriented woman. And what
I mean by that is that I believe in helping
a sister. Right. I wasn't going to backstab. I was
not trying to fight. I wasn't trying to do any
of that. Right, if you want them, you can have them.
I'm going to cut up.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
A few of his suits.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
I'm going to put him in a bag, and I'm
going to take him to your house. That's the way
we're going to handle this. And so she sent me flowers.
She was like, you're so nice, and she sent me flowers.
And I had a friend, my Cuban friend that is
always with me, and she was just like, I wouldn't
do it shows flowers if I was you.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
You don't even know what kind of stuff.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
She put flower wen he could be allergic.
Speaker 2 (09:34):
I was like, oh, this is sweet, Like, no, thanks,
I have enough friends. I don't really need more friends.
I don't my friend took the flowers and ducked him
in the trush. And so she called me a few weeks.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Later time when and I was again trying to heal myself,
and she called me and she said.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
You know, I haven't seen him in a few weeks.
Is he there? And I'm going, why are you alone?
You are not my friend? Why this is not my
problem anymore? But I haven't seen him in Weeksit I
missed my period this month. Bro, they always do.
Speaker 6 (10:17):
Everyone gets pregnant.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
At the end. Why did she she purposely? Yeah, that's
actually a very sad she got pregnant.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
So I said, oh my god, but wait, she didn't
get pregnant by herself, so clearly there was stuff.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Going on, and so I was devastated.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
So I experienced the betrayal again, right, but experience it
in so many different ways.
Speaker 2 (10:39):
So there were so many moments at that point.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
And so that's the point that I said, get out
of my life in a very bad tone, get out
of my life.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
And I never want to see you again.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
And do you know that I have never seen this
person again. And when I say never, I mean we're
in the same circles, we have similar friends, we're in
the same industry.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
And I've never seen this person again.
Speaker 1 (11:02):
The reason and the way that I survived this was
in understanding that I had to honor myself and that
I deserve someone that wanted to be with me, that
wanted to know my family, that wanted to hold my
hand walking down the street.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
He never wanted those things.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
And so if I was just the booty call, then
maybe it took me six years to figure that out.
Speaker 8 (11:25):
What you call we should promote toy. She should be
giving tips on actually, how do I become a six
years a podcast?
Speaker 7 (11:39):
Actually you need to build him he owes you reparations,
there's some kind of yeah, let's vendo request six years
six years.
Speaker 6 (11:51):
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for sharing that.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
That was crazy. Yeah, well, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
And I don't know how you guys feel like this
can help listeners, but thank you for allowing me to
share my story and for hopefully reminding somebody that if
your auntie tells you to drive by that house, you
better listen to your eat because they've been here longer
and they know how this works.
Speaker 6 (12:18):
Yeah, I agree, and I'm already proud of you.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
I'm happy, you know, look at where you are now,
and I'm happy that you honor yourself till this day.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Like it's an.
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Ongoing thing, and I know that he Lee is with
linear and it probably comes in ways, but I'm happy
that you can share the story now without like crying
about it. Now we could laugh about it and like
joke about it, you know, And I think that's the
best way to teach.
Speaker 6 (12:41):
Other people who are going through it at the moment.
So who does see you. I'm happy for.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
You, thank you, And there's no like I love it.
Speaker 5 (12:48):
It's like six years, like there's there's no amount of
time that's too long and too short, because you know,
people who've been their whole life. Somebody dies and then
you find out they had a whole o their family
or whatever. But it's like there's no time stamp on
treachery and we hear those stories.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
And you think it's never gonna happen to me. I'm
too smart. I know the signs.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
And you can't be too smart, too educated, too uneducated,
too like down from down round the way, wherever your
background is, there's betrayal and you're not the victim, right
I think at some point you realize I was there,
I participated in that relationship. I refused to see the
(13:30):
signs and I stayed. So there's some accountability that comes
from that as well.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
But yes, healing.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Comes with time, a sister and my brothers, you know,
because there's it goes both ways. I think a lot
of times we think this is a female story, but
this is a people story.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
And something else.
Speaker 5 (13:48):
I love about your stories that you didn't blame the messenger,
because I feel like so often in these stories, you know,
like the little intern that ended up spilling the beans, right,
how was that relationship?
Speaker 2 (13:59):
What was that relationship of Like that was fine.
Speaker 1 (14:01):
She was a young girl, had absolutely no idea what
she just said to me.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
She had absolutely no idea. So she was used by
the universe to give me another message.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
I was just about to say that, because you know,
I always say, whatever come, whatever you do in the dark,
unt always comes out in my life, always happens, and
I feel like the universe has send you people.
Speaker 6 (14:21):
First, it was your aunt that didn't work. You didn't
go to this house, wasn't bold enough?
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Yeah yeah, But then this girl was like, all right,
then this is what it is instead of you going
to look.
Speaker 6 (14:33):
For it, it came to you. So it usually it
usually is like that.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
And you know, it's good to have those type of
people in your life that.
Speaker 6 (14:42):
Are probably gonna like shine light.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
You know.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Wait, you have to act. You have to act at
some point. You have to act or you choose to stay.
And there are people who choose to stay. Yeah, and
I know you either have to act.
Speaker 5 (14:55):
Like I don't know what this is, I don't believe
what happened, or yeah. I mean one of my takeaways
is that I need a Gucci purse because that can
help me in troubling.
Speaker 6 (15:07):
Times and I can go on.
Speaker 5 (15:09):
I will be able to move on a little better
if I have that bag. Yeah, but thank you for
sharing that beautiful story. And you didn't even need alcohol,
Like wow, No, that means that she's really healed, she's.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
Good, she really ready to go.
Speaker 5 (15:26):
This is really why I say never ever get involved
with someone you work at. This is why I say
never get involved with someone you work with.
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Absolutely and also make sure you listen to your thet
all the time.
Speaker 6 (15:41):
She knows best.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
I'm a thief.
Speaker 6 (15:43):
I tell my nieces all the time what to do.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
They don't listen to me, but one day they're gonna
look back and be like, you know what, I should
have drove right by.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
That guy's house.
Speaker 6 (15:53):
Moral of the story, listen to your thet H.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Thanks so much for listening everyone.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
I'm Kate Robo, I'm Shy Ideas, and we'll be back
next time for another episode of Cheaters and Backstabbers
Hosts And Creators
Shari Diaz
Kate Robards
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