March 18, 2024 • 20 mins
Hi guys! I did it! I decided to go through with IVF after all. In this episode I share when I did it, why I decided to pull the trigger, I tell you all about my experience, and I also talk about cost. Plus, I also share a recent visit with my OBGYN, which ultimately uncovered something that may have prevented me from getting pregnant naturally all along!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
O La bian Benigos to Cheeky's and Chill. Today's episode
is going to be an interesting one. I have some
news to tell you guys, something that I've been on
the fence about for quite some time, and today I'm
going to talk about it. It's about IVF. Okay, So
spoiler alert, guys. I went through with it. Okay. So
(00:25):
let me take you guys back, because I have talked
about this on the pod quite a bit. The last
episode in which we talked about IVF, I had decided
not to go through with it. I wasn't feeling it.
I started the injections. I bought my medication, which was
very expensive, but I just wasn't ready mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually.
(00:47):
I just wasn't ready. I remember injecting myself and I
was just like in a bad mood. I just it
just didn't feel like the right time, and I said, Okay,
I'm going to give myself a year to get pregnant
if it happens. I wasn't trying to get pregnant. I
really wasn't trying to get pregnant at all. I wasn't
like I'm not on birth control or anything like that.
I was just like, Okay, if it happens, it happens.
But it didn't, and I feel that everything happens for
(01:08):
a reason. I was like, I know my body can
do this on its own. I know it can because
I get a period regularly, Like I can do it. Anyways,
didn't happen. I went to get, you know, a pap smear,
and then I found out I had pollups and they
had to remove those. And so my obgyn said, hey,
you know, if you guys want to have kids, because
Aamlio was with me, if you guys want to have kids,
(01:29):
we really have to start figuring out what we're gonna do.
I remember her telling me you will never regret having
a kid, but you will regret not having one. So
I was like, oh shit, that really hit me, and
I said, oh my god. Okay. So then Emilia and
I started kind of like talking about it and entertaining
the conversation a bit more because then I thought, okay,
(01:52):
I had these poll ups and the polyps were huge.
You guys, like, there were eight of them at first,
she only saw three. For those of you that don't
know what pollups are, so are like this, It's like tissue,
tissue that's filled with like blood and just like gunk.
I don't know exactly, but it was in the lining
of my uterus. So they're just like like chunks of meat,
really filled with blood. And I had eight of them.
(02:15):
At first she thought I had three, But when she
went in and I had to get and removed, she's like,
you know, cause I was bleeding and usually I was
like spotting like for two months, kind of NonStop, and
I was say, what's wrong with me? So that's why
I went to the doctor to go get that check.
So anyways, I find out that I have pollups. We
set a day for the surgery and she cleaned me
all up and she said, hey, I just wanted to
(02:36):
let you know you had eight, not three, and they
were pretty big and they were covering your fallopian tubes.
They were just all up in there. We don't know
how long they were there, so maybe that's what was
keeping you from getting pregnant naturally. So I said, okay, cool,
So then you know that's what happened. Then Emilia and
I left and we were talking about it, like talking about, okay,
are we gonna have kids? Like what are we really
(02:56):
going to do and more and more as I'm getting older,
I'm getting more mature. I'm thinking, you know what, I'm
so happy and I'm so satisfied and content and grateful
with how things are going in my career that I
feel like, this year, I want to continue doing music
(03:18):
and touring and stuff like that, but I am going
to want to slow down next year, you know, And
what does that look like? So we thought, you know what,
I don't want to just have an oops, oops, I'm pregnant.
I was like, you know now that the polyps aren't there.
Then I started talking about I'm like, okay, wait a second,
now this can really happen. Should I get on birth control?
We both decided no, we're not going to get on
(03:38):
birth control. We're just going to use a little mappy thing,
you know, the period tracker, because that's what I use,
so whenever I'm ovulating or fertile, let's you know, let's
be careful sort of thing. And I said, okay, well,
the clock is ticking. I am going to be a
year older, and every year you lose more eggs and
you lose more of the chance of getting pregnant naturally,
(04:00):
you know. So I said, you know what to take
the pressure off of me, Let me just do it,
let me do the IVF. And I had already given
myself December and January to be off and just say
even February, but it didn't happen that way. So I
was like, Okay, we're busy. That's good. Work has come in,
that's great. But I said, you know what, I'm going
to take January to get my boobs done. I'm also
(04:23):
going to take January to start IVF. I did quite
a bit in January. It was very busy, you guys,
which caused a whole other a whole lot of things
that I'll all tell you guys about. But I got
my boobies done first. I got them redone and all
that whole situation that we already talked about. And then
I made the appointment to do the IVF. I met
a new doctor. His name is Andy Wong. He's amazing.
(04:43):
He has helped many people with their IVF journey and
having children and people that I just wouldn't feel comfortable mentioning,
but people that I'm sure you guys know, very famous people.
And he was great and he made it happen like this.
I had the appointment with him. While I was in
Zo for New Years, I was out there with Emilio
(05:03):
and I had a zoom meeting with him, and everything
just happened. It just honestly all fell into place. I
feel like, Okay, this is meant to be you, guys,
because I wanted to take off the pressure of like
this year, I want to focus on a new album,
on a new tour. I have so many golds when
it comes to my music that I just wanted to
have the control of saying, Okay, I'm not going to
get pregnant naturally. I don't want it necessarily. I want
(05:26):
to have a plan. So now we have a plan. Anyways,
came back from Zion, did my boobs and did IVF
and once I swear to you, I went to the
doctor and he's like, Okay, we'll start in February, and
I said, damn, I don't want to start in February.
He's like, well, it's because your period. It all happens
with your period. You have to be on your period
when you start. Guys. Why did my period start like
(05:47):
two days after I saw him. I don't know if
it was because of my hormones were all crazy because
of the boob surgery. I have no idea, but my
period came early, so it all just happened. I called
to him, he said, call me as soon as you
get your period. Supposed to get a period at the
end of the month. I got it in the middle
of the month, so I was like, okay, this is
already like too perfect. I really wanted to start it
and be done with it in January. It happened. So anyways,
(06:10):
got my period, went in there and started the process.
I skipped which was the scariest part for me because
I've never been on birth control pills. The only type
of birth control I've ever done is the IUD, which is,
you know, the copper one, the ten year one that
has no hormones. Because I'm already like, I'm a cancer girl.
I'm like the moon and I It's just it's a lot.
So I was like, oh my god, if I'm on
birth control, I'm going to be like this crazy bitch.
(06:32):
So I was like, okay, I don't want to do
birth control pills, and what dude, I didn't have to.
I skipped that whole thing because He's like, Okay, no worries,
you started your period. Come in. We started the process.
I went straight to estrogen and I was only on that,
like on estrogen for like a few days, and everything
just happened so quickly. He put me on my injections,
and by the end of the month, we retrieved twelve eggs.
(06:54):
You guys, twelve eggs is a lot for my age.
So I was like, oh my god, so I have
twelve healthy eggs. Well, I don't know if they're healthy yet,
but I have twelve eggs. And usually it's about forty
percent of what you get that is healthy, because not
every egg is gonna be healthy. So I got twelve,
which is He's like, I just want to be in
the double digits, and we were thank god. I was
(07:15):
afraid of having to do another round because honestly, I'm
gonna tell you guys, it's a lot the injecting. It
hurts more and more because you have to do it.
Gets to the point where you do four injections in
one day. So I started off with one, then two,
then four. Then you feel bloated and your emotions are everywhere.
My skin was crazy, you guys, mind you I had
(07:36):
just got my boobs done, so imagine all these hormones
in my body, all this stuff that I'm injecting, and
my boobs are already super super sensitive, so then they
were like very sensitive, like extremely sensitive with everything. I
was very bloated. It was just a lot. It was
a lot. I don't regret it. I'm very happy that
I did it because now I don't feel that pressure.
Now I know, okay, there's twelve eggs, so I don't
(07:57):
regret it. It was great. I'm happy I don't have
to kind of worry. I have twelve eggs waiting for
me whenever I want to fertilize them or make embryos
or put them together. But it was it was a lot,
and it was very expensive. And the only reason I'm
telling you guys that it was expensive is just to
be honest. You guys know, I'm very transparent and honest
(08:18):
with you guys. But I feel like it was worth
every single penny, every single penny, mind you. My doctor
also does payment plans, which I think was awesome, where
it's like, okay, if you don't want to pay it all,
we'll do it in like increment's, you know, and installment payments,
which is awesome. And you know, again, his name is
doctor Andy Wong. He has an office in Redondo Beach,
in Beverly Hills, and once somewhere else I don't remember,
(08:41):
but he's great. The entire staff was awesome. And anyways,
it was about all in all, about twenty thousand dollars,
you guys, So it was hefty, and thank goodness, I'm
going to keep working this year so that we can
just you know, I'm when I have my kid, i'm'll
be like you already owe me twenty eight thousand dollars
a day it's born. I'm like, you aren't in debt
(09:03):
with me for twenty thousand dollars. I'm just kidding. But
but yes, it was expensive, but I do feel that
it is worth it. And again there are payment plans.
If there are any women out there that either are
in their twenties or in their early thirties or even
their late thirties, if you're looking into like doing IVF,
I do highly recommend it. I was on the fence
for a very long time and I did not feel
(09:24):
any pressure from a media. It wasn't about that. It
was more about to be honest about my career. It
was more about I want this year I'm going to
be a year older this year. You know, the account
goes way low every year. We lose so much. So
I said, you know what, I want to be able
to work comfortably and do what i'm doing without that
pressure of, oh my god, what if I do get
(09:44):
pregnant and it messes up the plan, which, regardless, a
baby would be a blessing. That's not what I'm saying.
But if I have that control issue, I'd rather just
control that a little bit more. And it did remove
a lot of pressure. I feel like I can breathe
you guys. I feel like I'm like, oh, I'm glad
I did it. So whenever we start planning, which I
think we might do it I don't know next year,
(10:07):
or we're going to try to do it naturally now
that we don't have those polyps in the way, I'll
try to do it naturally and if not, then I
have my backup plans. So I wanted to share that
with you guys because it is something super intimate. It
is something super personal. But I've shared everything with you
guys on this podcast, and I feel like if I
can help anybody, anyone that has felt like me, that
(10:30):
has been kind of like one foot in, one foot out,
and then both feed out and then that. Because I've
been like that, I've been like, I don't know, dude.
So I finally did it, and honestly, I feel so
good about it. I really do. I think I made
the right decision for me. I made the right decision
for me, not for anyone else, Not because I'm meant
to have a kid, not because I have to, not
because people are telling you. No, It's for me and
(10:52):
for Emilia and I and we were both on the
same page, and he was with me the entire way.
You guys, like he only missed one doctor's appointment, because
you have to go almost every other day to go
get everything checked and get an ultrasound, you know, to
make sure that the eggs are growing nice and big
and fluffy, and they call it what do they call it,
They call it, oh juicy. They're like, okay, oh these
look juicy, you know, so you have to check them.
(11:13):
But he was with me every single way. He would
like mix the medicine for me and sometimes inject me,
and he was very very patient. So that also helped
me a lot. But even if you do it by yourself,
it's okay as long as you have a friend someone
that can just you can speak to about it and
express your feelings because it is a rollercoaster of emotions,
and I definitely felt it. I had hot flashes, like
(11:36):
a motherfucker hot flashes. I was like, WHOA, I was like,
I wanted to be naked, and then I wanted to
be covered, and then most of the time I just
wanted to be naked. So it was crazy, but it
was definitely worth it. Definitely worth it. From what I hear.
When you do IVF, twins are very very common. You
(11:58):
can either Usually some will transfer two eggs at a
time to make sure that one stick. Sometimes both sticks.
Sometimes one egg divides into two. So it's very common,
especially with like my age and stuff like that, to
have twins. I wouldn't want twins, but if that's God's
will for my life, then I will figure it out.
(12:19):
I figure everything else out in my life. But for
a long time I wanted a boy. Now I'm okay
with whatever God wants. I do want to get, like
the genetic testing, I do want to do that. Emilia
and I talked about like what if you know, what
(12:40):
if there's only one healthy egg, you know what I mean.
If we're not able to get pregnant naturally, what would
we do? And what if that one egg had signs
of down syndrome. We've thought about that and Emidios more
of like, damn, I don't know if I want my
child to go through that. I'm more of like, well,
if that's the only egg we have, we really want
to have the baby, then that's what God wanted for me,
(13:04):
and I would go through with it. It's a lot.
This whole process has brought so many different things. We've
even thought about, Okay, like you know, we want to
have a civil wedding. We want to have, you know,
a spiritual wedding. Would I be okay with getting pregnant
because a spiritual wedding won't be until next year, So
what if I am pregnant? Then I was like, I'm fine.
So many things have changed, things that used to be
(13:26):
important to me, where it's like, oh my God, I
needed to look snatch for my wedding blah blah blah,
And now I'm like, you know what, no time is
of the essence. But now that I have my eggs,
I can be pregnant at forty five if I wanted to, like,
it doesn't matter. That's one thing that my doctor was like, Look,
you're young, your body's young, your uterus will never age.
(13:48):
It's the eggs. Everything else is fine. It's just the
eggs that are just like, hey, putting a little bit
more pressure. But now that we have that out of
the way, even if I wanted to wait to be
freaking pregnant at fifty, I can do that. I don't
know if that's what I want to do, but I'm
just saying, you know what I mean. So things have changed.
My perspective on things have changed so much, and I
swear to you guys, I feel like I could just
I could just breathe. I don't know. I'm just like
(14:11):
I can sigh and say, Okay, it's done. It taken
care of. But I did not want to go through
it again. To be honest, I was praying. I was like, God, no,
I was like, this is a lot. It's a lot.
Especially me. I'm so in tune with my body. I
feel everything. I know when something's wrong, I know when
I've taken something that's made me feel a certain way.
I'm very in tune with my body. So I was like,
(14:32):
it was a lot emotionally, but it was definitely worth it,
So I do recommend it. It's nothing out of this
world that you can't handle. Us women are fucking built
for freaking childbirth, you guys. We are built for so much.
And not just because I'm a feminist and yeah, but yeah,
you know, you know, freaking women, we're the badass, you know.
But honestly, like, we got this, We we got it.
(14:56):
So it's nothing out of this world, nothing that you
can't handle if that's what you decide to do, you know.
With all this IVF and then even this past weekend,
Emilio and I were talking a lot about baby stuff,
you know, and I feel that e Media is definitely
more ready than I am to have a baby. It's
(15:17):
crazy because I've been a parent to my siblings. I
feel like I've had freaking four kids, you know, with
the experience that I've lived with them and I've gone
through everything with them, as you guys know, I talk
about this on my podcast every day or all the time.
So anyways, but he, I think it's something he'd be
very good at at being a dad. And I know
you can't compare a dog to an actual real baby.
(15:40):
But the way that I see that he's with our dogs,
especially little baby one, ryu like, I'm just like, he's
so patient ever since we got him, like taking him
out to potty every four hours. That's a huge commitment.
I honestly wouldn't do it. I honestly, I was just like,
I don't know how this guy's doing it, because it
was like three months of it, of waking up in
the middle of the night, of being like super insistent.
(16:00):
I was like, dude, he'd be a great dad, you know,
to the point where I was even telling my friends,
I'm like, I feel that it's important to be careful
or if I have the opportunity to. Obviously has choose
the father of my child. Now I know, like he
makes me feel safe, and he makes me feel like
God forbid something happens to me, you know, I'm no
longer on earth, or we split up, God forbid, Like,
(16:23):
I know my child will be in good hands and
I don't have to worry about any other baby mama drama.
I've been through that, and I just I feel good
with him. And yes he's younger, and I feel like
he's gonna have a lot more energy, and we talked
about it this weekend. I was like, Hey, are you
gonna be okay with waking up and feeding the baby
and all this stuff. He's like, Oh, yeah, I'll do it,
(16:43):
don't even worry about it. I don't know. Maybe he'll
say that now to try to convince me to have
a kid, but it seems like he'll be really, really good,
and I know the type of mom I will be.
I can talk all this crap and be like, oh,
he's gonna do everything and blah blah blah, he's gonna
change all the diapers. But I already know myself. I
already know I'm gonna want to, like, you know, make
sure my baby's okay, and do anything and everything that
(17:06):
I can to give my baby the best life possible
before we go. Before we go, I'm gonna pull a card.
This is a game called We're Not Really Strangers. I'm
not sure if you guys have heard about it, but
if you haven't, check it out, I'm just gonna pull
a card. I feel like this would be different for
us to just try, and it could be. I don't know.
We'll see what kind of question that I can quickly
answer for you guys. Okay, So the question is if
(17:28):
you could have it your way, who would you be with,
where would you be what would you be doing? Oh
that's cute, Okay. So if I had it my way, hmmm,
I think that I would choose to be with my mother,
and I would be with her on my last birthday,
(17:50):
the last birthday that I spent with her, when she
took me and surprised me to the movie. She took
all of us to the movies, my siblings and I
And because that's like so me so janey, you know,
to go to the movies and have to do something
relaxing for my birthday, I would definitely go back to
that moment if I could. Right now, I like this
and no they're not paying me, you guys. I just
(18:11):
I love this game, and yeah, I thought it would
be something different. So yeah, guys, that's it' that's my
IVF journey. I did want and feel the responsibility to
let you guys know because I have taken you through everything,
even my first doctor and then me not doing it
and I'm trying in the whole thing. So now you
guys know it's out in the open. I did it,
(18:33):
so that's that you guys. It's always beautiful to be
able to speak to you guys about everything on the podcast.
I feel like this is definitely my safe place. Thank
you for making it that way. Thank you for listening
to this new episode. I hope you enjoy it, and
I hope that it inspires you or it's informative or
whatever it is. I just hope it touches your heart.
(18:53):
So yeah, guys, maybe you'll see me as a mommy.
I don't know if anytime soon, but soon in the
near future. Okay, guys, all right, well, thank you so much,
and I will see you on the next episode of
Cheeks and Chill. Do you need advice on love, relationships,
health emails? I'm so excited to share with you that
(19:15):
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drop each week. I'll be answering all your questions. Just
leave me a voice message. All you have to do
is go to speak pipe dot com slash Cheeky's and
Chill Podcast and record your questions. I can't wait to
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O La bian Benigos to Cheeky's and Chill. Today's episode
is going to be an interesting one. I have some
news to tell you guys, something that I've been on
the fence about for quite some time, and today I'm
going to talk about it. It's about IVF. Okay, So
spoiler alert, guys. I went through with it. Okay. So
(00:25):
let me take you guys back, because I have talked
about this on the pod quite a bit. The last
episode in which we talked about IVF, I had decided
not to go through with it. I wasn't feeling it.
I started the injections. I bought my medication, which was
very expensive, but I just wasn't ready mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually.
(00:47):
I just wasn't ready. I remember injecting myself and I
was just like in a bad mood. I just it
just didn't feel like the right time, and I said, Okay,
I'm going to give myself a year to get pregnant
if it happens. I wasn't trying to get pregnant. I
really wasn't trying to get pregnant at all. I wasn't
like I'm not on birth control or anything like that.
I was just like, Okay, if it happens, it happens.
But it didn't, and I feel that everything happens for
(01:08):
a reason. I was like, I know my body can
do this on its own. I know it can because
I get a period regularly, Like I can do it. Anyways,
didn't happen. I went to get, you know, a pap smear,
and then I found out I had pollups and they
had to remove those. And so my obgyn said, hey,
you know, if you guys want to have kids, because
Aamlio was with me, if you guys want to have kids,
(01:29):
we really have to start figuring out what we're gonna do.
I remember her telling me you will never regret having
a kid, but you will regret not having one. So
I was like, oh shit, that really hit me, and
I said, oh my god. Okay. So then Emilia and
I started kind of like talking about it and entertaining
the conversation a bit more because then I thought, okay,
(01:52):
I had these poll ups and the polyps were huge.
You guys, like, there were eight of them at first,
she only saw three. For those of you that don't
know what pollups are, so are like this, It's like tissue,
tissue that's filled with like blood and just like gunk.
I don't know exactly, but it was in the lining
of my uterus. So they're just like like chunks of meat,
really filled with blood. And I had eight of them.
(02:15):
At first she thought I had three, But when she
went in and I had to get and removed, she's like,
you know, cause I was bleeding and usually I was
like spotting like for two months, kind of NonStop, and
I was say, what's wrong with me? So that's why
I went to the doctor to go get that check.
So anyways, I find out that I have pollups. We
set a day for the surgery and she cleaned me
all up and she said, hey, I just wanted to
(02:36):
let you know you had eight, not three, and they
were pretty big and they were covering your fallopian tubes.
They were just all up in there. We don't know
how long they were there, so maybe that's what was
keeping you from getting pregnant naturally. So I said, okay, cool,
So then you know that's what happened. Then Emilia and
I left and we were talking about it, like talking about, okay,
are we gonna have kids? Like what are we really
(02:56):
going to do and more and more as I'm getting older,
I'm getting more mature. I'm thinking, you know what, I'm
so happy and I'm so satisfied and content and grateful
with how things are going in my career that I
feel like, this year, I want to continue doing music
(03:18):
and touring and stuff like that, but I am going
to want to slow down next year, you know, And
what does that look like? So we thought, you know what,
I don't want to just have an oops, oops, I'm pregnant.
I was like, you know now that the polyps aren't there.
Then I started talking about I'm like, okay, wait a second,
now this can really happen. Should I get on birth control?
We both decided no, we're not going to get on
(03:38):
birth control. We're just going to use a little mappy thing,
you know, the period tracker, because that's what I use,
so whenever I'm ovulating or fertile, let's you know, let's
be careful sort of thing. And I said, okay, well,
the clock is ticking. I am going to be a
year older, and every year you lose more eggs and
you lose more of the chance of getting pregnant naturally,
(04:00):
you know. So I said, you know what to take
the pressure off of me, Let me just do it,
let me do the IVF. And I had already given
myself December and January to be off and just say
even February, but it didn't happen that way. So I
was like, Okay, we're busy. That's good. Work has come in,
that's great. But I said, you know what, I'm going
to take January to get my boobs done. I'm also
(04:23):
going to take January to start IVF. I did quite
a bit in January. It was very busy, you guys,
which caused a whole other a whole lot of things
that I'll all tell you guys about. But I got
my boobies done first. I got them redone and all
that whole situation that we already talked about. And then
I made the appointment to do the IVF. I met
a new doctor. His name is Andy Wong. He's amazing.
(04:43):
He has helped many people with their IVF journey and
having children and people that I just wouldn't feel comfortable mentioning,
but people that I'm sure you guys know, very famous people.
And he was great and he made it happen like this.
I had the appointment with him. While I was in
Zo for New Years, I was out there with Emilio
(05:03):
and I had a zoom meeting with him, and everything
just happened. It just honestly all fell into place. I
feel like, Okay, this is meant to be you, guys,
because I wanted to take off the pressure of like
this year, I want to focus on a new album,
on a new tour. I have so many golds when
it comes to my music that I just wanted to
have the control of saying, Okay, I'm not going to
get pregnant naturally. I don't want it necessarily. I want
(05:26):
to have a plan. So now we have a plan. Anyways,
came back from Zion, did my boobs and did IVF
and once I swear to you, I went to the
doctor and he's like, Okay, we'll start in February, and
I said, damn, I don't want to start in February.
He's like, well, it's because your period. It all happens
with your period. You have to be on your period
when you start. Guys. Why did my period start like
(05:47):
two days after I saw him. I don't know if
it was because of my hormones were all crazy because
of the boob surgery. I have no idea, but my
period came early, so it all just happened. I called
to him, he said, call me as soon as you
get your period. Supposed to get a period at the
end of the month. I got it in the middle
of the month, so I was like, okay, this is
already like too perfect. I really wanted to start it
and be done with it in January. It happened. So anyways,
(06:10):
got my period, went in there and started the process.
I skipped which was the scariest part for me because
I've never been on birth control pills. The only type
of birth control I've ever done is the IUD, which is,
you know, the copper one, the ten year one that
has no hormones. Because I'm already like, I'm a cancer girl.
I'm like the moon and I It's just it's a lot.
So I was like, oh my god, if I'm on
birth control, I'm going to be like this crazy bitch.
(06:32):
So I was like, okay, I don't want to do
birth control pills, and what dude, I didn't have to.
I skipped that whole thing because He's like, Okay, no worries,
you started your period. Come in. We started the process.
I went straight to estrogen and I was only on that,
like on estrogen for like a few days, and everything
just happened so quickly. He put me on my injections,
and by the end of the month, we retrieved twelve eggs.
(06:54):
You guys, twelve eggs is a lot for my age.
So I was like, oh my god, so I have
twelve healthy eggs. Well, I don't know if they're healthy yet,
but I have twelve eggs. And usually it's about forty
percent of what you get that is healthy, because not
every egg is gonna be healthy. So I got twelve,
which is He's like, I just want to be in
the double digits, and we were thank god. I was
(07:15):
afraid of having to do another round because honestly, I'm
gonna tell you guys, it's a lot the injecting. It
hurts more and more because you have to do it.
Gets to the point where you do four injections in
one day. So I started off with one, then two,
then four. Then you feel bloated and your emotions are everywhere.
My skin was crazy, you guys, mind you I had
(07:36):
just got my boobs done, so imagine all these hormones
in my body, all this stuff that I'm injecting, and
my boobs are already super super sensitive, so then they
were like very sensitive, like extremely sensitive with everything. I
was very bloated. It was just a lot. It was
a lot. I don't regret it. I'm very happy that
I did it because now I don't feel that pressure.
Now I know, okay, there's twelve eggs, so I don't
(07:57):
regret it. It was great. I'm happy I don't have
to kind of worry. I have twelve eggs waiting for
me whenever I want to fertilize them or make embryos
or put them together. But it was it was a lot,
and it was very expensive. And the only reason I'm
telling you guys that it was expensive is just to
be honest. You guys know, I'm very transparent and honest
(08:18):
with you guys. But I feel like it was worth
every single penny, every single penny, mind you. My doctor
also does payment plans, which I think was awesome, where
it's like, okay, if you don't want to pay it all,
we'll do it in like increment's, you know, and installment payments,
which is awesome. And you know, again, his name is
doctor Andy Wong. He has an office in Redondo Beach,
in Beverly Hills, and once somewhere else I don't remember,
(08:41):
but he's great. The entire staff was awesome. And anyways,
it was about all in all, about twenty thousand dollars,
you guys, So it was hefty, and thank goodness, I'm
going to keep working this year so that we can
just you know, I'm when I have my kid, i'm'll
be like you already owe me twenty eight thousand dollars
a day it's born. I'm like, you aren't in debt
(09:03):
with me for twenty thousand dollars. I'm just kidding. But
but yes, it was expensive, but I do feel that
it is worth it. And again there are payment plans.
If there are any women out there that either are
in their twenties or in their early thirties or even
their late thirties, if you're looking into like doing IVF,
I do highly recommend it. I was on the fence
for a very long time and I did not feel
(09:24):
any pressure from a media. It wasn't about that. It
was more about to be honest about my career. It
was more about I want this year I'm going to
be a year older this year. You know, the account
goes way low every year. We lose so much. So
I said, you know what, I want to be able
to work comfortably and do what i'm doing without that
pressure of, oh my god, what if I do get
(09:44):
pregnant and it messes up the plan, which, regardless, a
baby would be a blessing. That's not what I'm saying.
But if I have that control issue, I'd rather just
control that a little bit more. And it did remove
a lot of pressure. I feel like I can breathe
you guys. I feel like I'm like, oh, I'm glad
I did it. So whenever we start planning, which I
think we might do it I don't know next year,
(10:07):
or we're going to try to do it naturally now
that we don't have those polyps in the way, I'll
try to do it naturally and if not, then I
have my backup plans. So I wanted to share that
with you guys because it is something super intimate. It
is something super personal. But I've shared everything with you
guys on this podcast, and I feel like if I
can help anybody, anyone that has felt like me, that
(10:30):
has been kind of like one foot in, one foot out,
and then both feed out and then that. Because I've
been like that, I've been like, I don't know, dude.
So I finally did it, and honestly, I feel so
good about it. I really do. I think I made
the right decision for me. I made the right decision
for me, not for anyone else, Not because I'm meant
to have a kid, not because I have to, not
because people are telling you. No, It's for me and
(10:52):
for Emilia and I and we were both on the
same page, and he was with me the entire way.
You guys, like he only missed one doctor's appointment, because
you have to go almost every other day to go
get everything checked and get an ultrasound, you know, to
make sure that the eggs are growing nice and big
and fluffy, and they call it what do they call it,
They call it, oh juicy. They're like, okay, oh these
look juicy, you know, so you have to check them.
(11:13):
But he was with me every single way. He would
like mix the medicine for me and sometimes inject me,
and he was very very patient. So that also helped
me a lot. But even if you do it by yourself,
it's okay as long as you have a friend someone
that can just you can speak to about it and
express your feelings because it is a rollercoaster of emotions,
and I definitely felt it. I had hot flashes, like
(11:36):
a motherfucker hot flashes. I was like, WHOA, I was like,
I wanted to be naked, and then I wanted to
be covered, and then most of the time I just
wanted to be naked. So it was crazy, but it
was definitely worth it. Definitely worth it. From what I hear.
When you do IVF, twins are very very common. You
(11:58):
can either Usually some will transfer two eggs at a
time to make sure that one stick. Sometimes both sticks.
Sometimes one egg divides into two. So it's very common,
especially with like my age and stuff like that, to
have twins. I wouldn't want twins, but if that's God's
will for my life, then I will figure it out.
(12:19):
I figure everything else out in my life. But for
a long time I wanted a boy. Now I'm okay
with whatever God wants. I do want to get, like
the genetic testing, I do want to do that. Emilia
and I talked about like what if you know, what
(12:40):
if there's only one healthy egg, you know what I mean.
If we're not able to get pregnant naturally, what would
we do? And what if that one egg had signs
of down syndrome. We've thought about that and Emidios more
of like, damn, I don't know if I want my
child to go through that. I'm more of like, well,
if that's the only egg we have, we really want
to have the baby, then that's what God wanted for me,
(13:04):
and I would go through with it. It's a lot.
This whole process has brought so many different things. We've
even thought about, Okay, like you know, we want to
have a civil wedding. We want to have, you know,
a spiritual wedding. Would I be okay with getting pregnant
because a spiritual wedding won't be until next year, So
what if I am pregnant? Then I was like, I'm fine.
So many things have changed, things that used to be
(13:26):
important to me, where it's like, oh my God, I
needed to look snatch for my wedding blah blah blah,
And now I'm like, you know what, no time is
of the essence. But now that I have my eggs,
I can be pregnant at forty five if I wanted to, like,
it doesn't matter. That's one thing that my doctor was like, Look,
you're young, your body's young, your uterus will never age.
(13:48):
It's the eggs. Everything else is fine. It's just the
eggs that are just like, hey, putting a little bit
more pressure. But now that we have that out of
the way, even if I wanted to wait to be
freaking pregnant at fifty, I can do that. I don't
know if that's what I want to do, but I'm
just saying, you know what I mean. So things have changed.
My perspective on things have changed so much, and I
swear to you guys, I feel like I could just
I could just breathe. I don't know. I'm just like
(14:11):
I can sigh and say, Okay, it's done. It taken
care of. But I did not want to go through
it again. To be honest, I was praying. I was like, God, no,
I was like, this is a lot. It's a lot.
Especially me. I'm so in tune with my body. I
feel everything. I know when something's wrong, I know when
I've taken something that's made me feel a certain way.
I'm very in tune with my body. So I was like,
(14:32):
it was a lot emotionally, but it was definitely worth it,
So I do recommend it. It's nothing out of this
world that you can't handle. Us women are fucking built
for freaking childbirth, you guys. We are built for so much.
And not just because I'm a feminist and yeah, but yeah,
you know, you know, freaking women, we're the badass, you know.
But honestly, like, we got this, We we got it.
(14:56):
So it's nothing out of this world, nothing that you
can't handle if that's what you decide to do, you know.
With all this IVF and then even this past weekend,
Emilio and I were talking a lot about baby stuff,
you know, and I feel that e Media is definitely
more ready than I am to have a baby. It's
(15:17):
crazy because I've been a parent to my siblings. I
feel like I've had freaking four kids, you know, with
the experience that I've lived with them and I've gone
through everything with them, as you guys know, I talk
about this on my podcast every day or all the time.
So anyways, but he, I think it's something he'd be
very good at at being a dad. And I know
you can't compare a dog to an actual real baby.
(15:40):
But the way that I see that he's with our dogs,
especially little baby one, ryu like, I'm just like, he's
so patient ever since we got him, like taking him
out to potty every four hours. That's a huge commitment.
I honestly wouldn't do it. I honestly, I was just like,
I don't know how this guy's doing it, because it
was like three months of it, of waking up in
the middle of the night, of being like super insistent.
(16:00):
I was like, dude, he'd be a great dad, you know,
to the point where I was even telling my friends,
I'm like, I feel that it's important to be careful
or if I have the opportunity to. Obviously has choose
the father of my child. Now I know, like he
makes me feel safe, and he makes me feel like
God forbid something happens to me, you know, I'm no
longer on earth, or we split up, God forbid, Like,
(16:23):
I know my child will be in good hands and
I don't have to worry about any other baby mama drama.
I've been through that, and I just I feel good
with him. And yes he's younger, and I feel like
he's gonna have a lot more energy, and we talked
about it this weekend. I was like, Hey, are you
gonna be okay with waking up and feeding the baby
and all this stuff. He's like, Oh, yeah, I'll do it,
(16:43):
don't even worry about it. I don't know. Maybe he'll
say that now to try to convince me to have
a kid, but it seems like he'll be really, really good,
and I know the type of mom I will be.
I can talk all this crap and be like, oh,
he's gonna do everything and blah blah blah, he's gonna
change all the diapers. But I already know myself. I
already know I'm gonna want to, like, you know, make
sure my baby's okay, and do anything and everything that
(17:06):
I can to give my baby the best life possible
before we go. Before we go, I'm gonna pull a card.
This is a game called We're Not Really Strangers. I'm
not sure if you guys have heard about it, but
if you haven't, check it out, I'm just gonna pull
a card. I feel like this would be different for
us to just try, and it could be. I don't know.
We'll see what kind of question that I can quickly
answer for you guys. Okay, So the question is if
(17:28):
you could have it your way, who would you be with,
where would you be what would you be doing? Oh
that's cute, Okay. So if I had it my way, hmmm,
I think that I would choose to be with my mother,
and I would be with her on my last birthday,
(17:50):
the last birthday that I spent with her, when she
took me and surprised me to the movie. She took
all of us to the movies, my siblings and I
And because that's like so me so janey, you know,
to go to the movies and have to do something
relaxing for my birthday, I would definitely go back to
that moment if I could. Right now, I like this
and no they're not paying me, you guys. I just
(18:11):
I love this game, and yeah, I thought it would
be something different. So yeah, guys, that's it' that's my
IVF journey. I did want and feel the responsibility to
let you guys know because I have taken you through everything,
even my first doctor and then me not doing it
and I'm trying in the whole thing. So now you
guys know it's out in the open. I did it,
(18:33):
so that's that you guys. It's always beautiful to be
able to speak to you guys about everything on the podcast.
I feel like this is definitely my safe place. Thank
you for making it that way. Thank you for listening
to this new episode. I hope you enjoy it, and
I hope that it inspires you or it's informative or
whatever it is. I just hope it touches your heart.
(18:53):
So yeah, guys, maybe you'll see me as a mommy.
I don't know if anytime soon, but soon in the
near future. Okay, guys, all right, well, thank you so much,
and I will see you on the next episode of
Cheeks and Chill. Do you need advice on love, relationships,
health emails? I'm so excited to share with you that
(19:15):
my Cheeky's and Chill podcast will have an extra episode
drop each week. I'll be answering all your questions. Just
leave me a voice message. All you have to do
is go to speak pipe dot com slash Cheeky's and
Chill Podcast and record your questions. I can't wait to
hear from you. This is a production of iHeartRadio and
(19:38):
the Microldura podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram at Michael
Dura podcasts and follow me Cheeky's That's c h i
q u i s. For more podcasts from iHeart, visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite podcast, and check us out on YouTube
Host
Chiquis
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