July 27, 2022 • 24 mins
Disgraced game show host Don Saldívar makes his return with this Weakest Link rip-off. Real contestants answer quick-fire general knowledge questions in a desperate hope to not be called a stupid, weak loser.
Martin Urbano is a hip Latino comedian/writer/satirist. He has performed on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Comedy Central, The CW, and recently taped a set for the stand-up comedy series This Joka with Will Smith and Westbrook Studios. Martin was featured as a cast member on the National Lampoon Radio Hour reboot and was one of Vulture's Comics to Watch in 2019. Martin worked as a writer/producer for Danny's House on Viceland and has hosted several episodes of Chris Gethard Presents on MNN. Martin was a 2017 New Face at Just For Laughs. While there, he was added to Howie Mandel's Comedy Gala, which was filmed for The CW. Follow Martin on Instagram at @martinurbanojr and on Twitter at @martinurbano.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Hey, Hi, Yeah, um, what do you want for lunch?
I haven't even thought about it. I have my breakfast
in front of me. Hi. Sorry, did it's already start again?
You guys are both an hour early this time. It's breakfast.
I thought we were on lunch. I'm sorry. I just
flew in from from these coasts. I just flew in
from Prague, So I'm all screwed up. What the hell? Guys? Okay,
(00:29):
it's fine. I mean we're not gonna I don't think
we're gonna be on the same timelines for the rest
of the days. Whatever. Just to sit down, take a seat,
I lie down again. No, no, whatever. It did really
work because the husband Hunt. Let me just say, Stepmom
and the husband Hunt was a huge success success and
it's due to you, due to you know you do well.
(00:50):
I think has a threesome as a three way. We
really crushed it. It was just great to get someone
living in Los Angeles to do to do a podcast. Yeah,
well guess what, it's not stopping there. No, I think
we're open to hearing more from you, Will about other
people you like the you like the first suggestion. I think.
So the trial run was successful. Will okay, and so however,
(01:14):
you need to possession yourself the room. Am I getting
yelled at right now? Okayed? I had my sugar free
red Bull with my As you can see, I'm in
process on my breakfast and the fact that you guys
are so early it doesn't even bump me, do you, guys?
I'm sorry, I have some Athletic Greens. You guys want
some that powder that Tim Ferris loves. This here here,
let me just crack over a can here get Thanks
(01:37):
for handing it to me. Good object work everyone, And
this is this is Athletic Greens. It's got all your
vitamins and all your sort of nutrients in one drink
in the morning. Sorry, I just I think I think
we should just do a beverage every time I'm feeling
this is this is uh, it's it's tastes better than
you think it's gonna taste. Absolutely, but it doesn't taste good. No.
(02:00):
And you know, speaking of the five senses, because taste
is one of them, Let's talk about things we can hear, Hey,
dream us of something here? This is very interesting. Okay.
I don't know if you guys are familiar with Martin
so funny This is just I'm so happy you said
the name Martin because I've been wanted to see something
(02:20):
from him. Yeah, great young talent, and he was tough
to get. I'm not gonna lie, I don't. I'm not
surprised you guys are gonna have to send over some swag,
just duly duly warned, or are some more of the greens.
But he is a hip Latino comedian, writer satirist. He's
(02:40):
performed on Jimmy Kimmel Live, one of the Great Jimmy's
Comedy Central w channel. Now Guess what. Guess what? The
title of his his projects called, let me guess. Don
Sealdvar there Don sell Devar, who is a recently paroled
sleazy game show host. He puts audience members to the
(03:02):
test through multiple intense games to win money and is respect.
It's like we have our own wheel of fortune. It's
like we have our own wheel of fortune, our own cash. Caberne,
who wants to be a millionaire. My imagination is running wild.
C Well, I think you might be honest something here, guys.
I'm just you know, I'm just going with my gut.
(03:23):
You know, I'm just so pleased that you guys are happy,
because I know when you're not happy, it's not fun around. Yeah,
it gets real violent here. You only you only know
that anecdotally because we've never actually been angry at you
just heard. Yeah, and keep telling people. Okay, we want
to be feared. Okay, Marcavelli, who Machiavelli us us. Let's
(03:46):
take a listen to Martin. Yeah, yeah, this is done. Saldivar. Hello,
and welcome to the Weakest Loser. I'm your host, Don Saldivar,
and in your ears, aren't being women to you? And
by that, I mean they aren't playing tricks? Now. I
know it wasn't too long ago that I quit my
(04:08):
other game show, Big Saturday. But the good men and
people here at Clown Parade we're lucky enough to get
me after an intense bidding war, despite any rumors you
might have heard that no one wanted to hire me
after all of those articles came out. But enough about gossip.
We're here to play a game tonight. Three contestants play
(04:30):
for the chance to win dollars and cents. Let's meet
our contestants now, all right, Contestant number one, what's your name? No,
I'm oz Band. Oh no, I'm crazy me too, alright.
Contestant number two, what's your name Rebecca? Nor Rebecca? And
(04:54):
what's something interesting about yourself? Just kidding? Next contestant, what's
your name Francis Siski? Oh, you know, my wife wanted
to name our baby that, but that's why I left her.
All right, Now that that's out of the way, let
me explain the rules. In round number one, each of
you will take turns answering a series of general knowledge
(05:15):
trivia questions. At the end of the round, if you
have the least amount of points, we will throw a
seventy pound dumbbell at you. If you can't catch it
with only one hand, you will be eliminated. Alright, any
questions perfect, Then we'll start round number one of the
(05:39):
weakest loser. All right, we have three minutes on the
clock starting now. No, I have the lyrics tattooed above
my ass. But who wrote the song girl You'll be
a Woman suit? Neil Diamond correct one for noam alright, Rebecca,
(06:01):
which popular nineties sitcom star dated a high school student
during the fifth season of his self titled television show,
sign felt correct, Francis. Some people might think that when
you boil a lobster. You can hear them screaming, but
that noise is actually the lobster going yay we I
(06:24):
love this. But the casual dining restaurant Red Lobster is
known for their what kind of biscuits? Cheese biscuits? I'm
gonna need a slightly more specific answer. Francis cheddar Cheddar
cheese so close? Like Cheddar, I need an exact location
(06:44):
of the Cheddar montsego Is. Fortunately, we can't accept that
cheddar bay Cheddar cheddar Bay biscuits. Alright? Went wrong for
Francis Noah, I love Pepe, which is, of course my
acronym for which children's television show that features six rescue
(07:05):
dogs and a cute young man named writer uh uh
pp dogs so close? I wish I could pitch that show,
but that it is Paw Patrol, Paw Patrol. Alright, Rebecca,
I think the guy from the Da Vinci Code who
(07:26):
whips himself on the back is kind of hot. But
which author wrote the novel The da Vinci Code at
Davincy so close? Dan Brown? Dan Brown? Alright, Francis Naked
and afraid is more than just the only thing I
wrote on my dating profile. It's also a television show
(07:49):
and on the show Naked and Afraid, how many days
are the contestants left Naked and Afraid? Thirty? It's thirty
days twenty one? Are you kidding? Too confident for that?
Wrong of an answer? All right, No, I'm this author
loved to date teenagers. Okay, I'll narrow it down for you.
He also wrote a book called The Catcher in the Rye.
(08:12):
Oh god. J. D. Salinger? Correct, all right, Rebecca. If
I were a star constellation and I wanted to make
myself orgasm, I'd probably use Who's belt? Correct? All right,
Francis Brittney Spears dad seems like a really cool guy.
(08:38):
But which YouTuber went viral for their video leave Brittany Alone?
Oh man, I don't know his name? John John John
Brittany Alone. Guy, unbelievably close. Chris Crocker, Chris Crocker. Okay,
and that is the end of round number one. Wow,
(09:02):
what an exciting round. How does everybody feel? Defeat it? Oh? Well,
then everything is going right on track. All right. I'm
tabulating the score now, and unfortunately, Francis, you have the
least amount of points if you don't catch this seventy
(09:22):
pound dumbbell using only one hand. You are eliminated. Are
you ready? Catch? I didn't get so close. Francis, you
are the weakest loser. Get out of here, you weak,
weak loser. Hello, loser. Now that you lost, let's get
(09:46):
your thoughts. How did you feel about how everything went down? Honestly,
I I don't feel too bad because the questions I
got wrong are questions that I don't think I should know,
So I don't feel too too terrible. Yeah. What do
you think about the host of the show, Dawn Oh Man,
(10:08):
I'm a huge fan of Dawn's man. Donna was his
so solids are ya? Don He's a he's intense man,
um intense presence. He has a musk that is kind
of hard to get out of your nose, but worth it,
you know. Nice guy. Oh, what an exciting turn of events.
(10:32):
But things are only going to get more exciting when
I drink tequila. Dearie, these messages, m h m hm
m all right, we're back. Let's get to meet our contestants.
(10:55):
Just a little bit more. No, I'm it says here,
someone you love is keeping a terrible secret from you.
Tell us more. I have a fifteen month old kid,
and I suspect dark things? Why because he's stone walling me.
I look at him and he won't say any of them.
M that makes sense. I wouldn't trust you with much either. No,
(11:16):
just from the quick vibes I've gotten off of you
since round number one. All right, and Rebecca, I hear
people like to laugh at you behind your back? What's
that about? Just my day to day being. People watched
me and just laugh as I go about my work
and my daily activities. And what do you do for
work or daily activities? I work in tech. Oh, no,
(11:39):
more questions? All right, enough talking to you. Time to
play another round of the Weakest Loser. We have more
general knowledge trivia questions coming your way. But in this round,
we are throwing a seventy one pound dumbbell at the
player with the least amount of points. If you fail
(12:02):
to catch the dumbbell using only one hand, you are eliminated.
Are you ready? Yeah? This time we're gonna put four
minutes on the clock. All right, here we go. No
(12:23):
on al Gore more like Al Snore, That boring ass
bitch made a documentary about climate change called What an
Inconvenient Truth? Correct Rebecca. Hmm Bob bad bad bad baby
Dad Bob bad? Oh? Yeah yeah, m Bob? Who sings
(12:49):
that song? I don't know before my Hansom handsome? Alright,
what's wrong for Rebecca? No on my Ataconda. Don't want
none unless you got what hon buns? Correct Rebecca, Virgin Atlantic.
I'd rather fly the Atlantic? But who founded the company?
(13:13):
Virgin Atlantic? H Virgin Mary? Oh, I wish that is
Richard Branson My Virgin Mary. Rebecca off to a horrible start, Noah.
Although actor Mark Ruffalo is mostly known for playing the
hero in which movie, did he play a journalist at
(13:35):
the Boston Globe? Uh? Spotlight? Correct? All right, Rebecca, you
gotta get back in the game. I've never been more
upset at anything in my entire life. But the female
lad Ghostbusters reboot saw a reunion between Bridesmaids co stars
Kristin Wig and who Uh Melissa McCarthy correct, act alright,
(14:01):
Rebecca getting back in the game. No, I hear she's
difficult to work with. But the sequel to which animated
film is adding the character of an infant executive named
Tina Templeton boss Baby correct alright, Rebecca Yokioo Taco Bell,
which Latino American civil rights activist co founded the National
(14:24):
farm Workers Association and posthumously received the Presidential Medal of
Freedom in nineteen ninety four. If no clue, do you
even repeat it? Yokiero Taco Bell, actual, Latino American civil
rights activist co founded the National farm Workers Association and
posthumously received the Presidential Medal of Freedom in nineteen ninety four.
(14:46):
Pass so close, he got boss Baby and I got
chaves to me, They're one and the same. Alright, No weird.
The rock band Kansas was formed in which US state
um ah man uh Nebraska, Kansas? That is unfortunate? Alright, Rebecca.
(15:19):
In the song Famous, the lyrics state quote I made
that bitch famous. Who is the quote bitch in which
musician Kanye West is referring to correct? All right? No,
I'm I've never played tennis before, but I could probably
win against Serena Williams six to oh. But the current
(15:41):
top ranked women's tennis player, Ashley Bartie is from which country? Uh, France?
Basically the same Australia. All right, and Rebecca, she may
be the definition of pure evil, But which feminist icon
(16:03):
founded Miss Magazine and the Women's Media Center. Um, I
have no clue. Um, Randa Priestley, So so close? Glorious Steinhum,
Glorious steinhum. Alright, Wow, what an exciting round that was? Wow?
(16:29):
How does everybody feel? No? I'm I feel good. I
feel good. I boss baby, say no more? All right, Rebecca,
how do you feel after an intense second round? I
feel heinous right now? What makes you feel so heinous
because you didn't know? Cess our drives or Glorious Steinhum? Yes,
(16:51):
I wish I got the anaconda question, lad, luck of
the draw? All right, I'm tabulating the score right now,
and unfortunately, Rebecca, you have the least amount of points.
You are the weakest loser. Here is a seventy one
pound weight catch. No, that was so close. That was
(17:12):
so close. While unfortunately, because you couldn't catch that with
only one hand, you are eliminated. Get out of my sight,
you week week loser by Hello, a loser. Now that
you lost, let's get your thoughts. How did you feel
about how everything went down? Defeated, devastated, heartbroken? What are
(17:37):
you going to do now? Go back to school? I
have a lot to learn in history specifically, all right, no,
I have you made it to the final round? Will
you win big? Or will you walk away small? Weak
and a loser? Find out when we return to the
(18:01):
weakest loser and we are back. Wow, what an exciting
first two rounds we've had. We're going into the final
(18:21):
round with no. I'm no, I'm you made it to
the final round? How are you feeling? I feel excited,
I feel nervous. I am worried about smashing my right
hand on the Have you wait if I don't do well? Oh,
don't worry about that. We've never had anybody get hurt
and sued us before, so you know. I don't know
(18:43):
if it's the n d as we make them sign beforehand,
or what's keeping us afloat. But no, M I gotta ask,
have you ever want anything in your life? I have? UM?
I have? I actually say no more. All right, let's
get into a final round. No, I'm I'm going to
ask you ten general knowledge trivia questions. If you get
(19:11):
three questions wrong, you walk away with nothing except for
the one hundred pound dumbbell we will be throwing at you,
and if you can't catch it with one hand, you
won't be allowed to keep it. But if you make
it to the end of all ten questions, you will
win dollars and sense. All right, no, I'm are you
(19:38):
ready to get into it? Let's do this, all right?
No time on the clock. You just have ten questions.
You've got to make it through. Noam, Your question number
one is I got kicked out of school because I
wouldn't stop calling Abraham Lincoln of virtue signaling cock. But
Abraham Lincoln served as a member of the House of
Representatives for m which US state? Um from the capital
(20:04):
of the country, Illinois? That is correct? All right? One
for normal question number two, I'd love to perform a
fatality on my wife, if you know what I mean.
But which video game first released in the nineteen nineties
featured fatalities? Uh? Grand Theft Auto so close? Mortal Kombat,
(20:29):
Mortal Kombat. Alright, that's one strike, but you're still in
the game, noam h. In December of nineteen fifty eight,
NASA sent an animal named Gordo into space. Gordo did
not survive. But what kind of animal was Gordo? A primate?
(20:49):
At chimpanzee? It says here monkey, so im and accepted
all right. No, Question number four. Tilla come is my
safe word. But tilla come is also the name of
a whale seen slowly dying in which documentary. Oh um
um ah, blackfish. Correct. Don't don't sound so unsure of yourself.
(21:15):
That is absolutely correct. You sounded like you were just
making that up off the top of your head. But no,
that is absolutely right. And then it would have been
really awkward if that wasn't actually the name of the movie.
Here alright, noam. Question number five Dora the Explorer or
is it's known in the US? Dora the Explorer premiered
on which television network, PBS, so Close, Nickelodeon, Colodeon. No,
(21:43):
I'm that is strike two. You're on question number six.
If you get one more wrong, you are walking away
with nothing. How do you feel about that? Well, hopefully
I get to walk away with a hundred pound bell. Well,
if you can't catch it with one hand, you won't
be able to keep it. But no, I'm there's a
lot writing on these next ship five questions. Here we go.
(22:06):
I always thought it was a vagina, but it's actually
pac Man's mouth. But I'm sure it's a vagina. On
the female version of pac Man, whose exact name is
what Mrs pac Man? Oh it is Ms pac Man.
(22:27):
I don't see a ring on that vagina. No, I'm
you are the weakest of the losers. But of course
I'm gonna throw this one d pound dumbell at you.
That's my good hand. Hello, a loser. Now that you lost,
(22:53):
let's get your thoughts. How did you feel about how
everything went down? It's heartbreaking. Its five questions away from
glory and now I'm a loser. I'm gonna turn to
my fifteen month old kid. Is he keeping secrets from me?
I'm gonna say, your dad's a loser. He's gonna just
look at me because the stone walls. What do you
think about the host of the show. Um, he made
(23:18):
me giddy, he made me happy, and then he broke
my heart. Then he broke my heart. So don can
rotten heell? What are you going to do now? Um
gonna sit that fifteen month old down. I'm gonna look
him in the eye and say, it's time for you
to start telling me secrets. It's time to start letting
(23:39):
it all out. No diapers until you tell me secrets. Son,
h A right, that's our show. Thanks for listening and
until next time, always remember those vicious rumors about me
are completely true. Good Night, m.
Hey, Hi, Yeah, um, what do you want for lunch?
I haven't even thought about it. I have my breakfast
in front of me. Hi. Sorry, did it's already start again?
You guys are both an hour early this time. It's breakfast.
I thought we were on lunch. I'm sorry. I just
flew in from from these coasts. I just flew in
from Prague, So I'm all screwed up. What the hell? Guys? Okay,
(00:29):
it's fine. I mean we're not gonna I don't think
we're gonna be on the same timelines for the rest
of the days. Whatever. Just to sit down, take a seat,
I lie down again. No, no, whatever. It did really
work because the husband Hunt. Let me just say, Stepmom
and the husband Hunt was a huge success success and
it's due to you, due to you know you do well.
(00:50):
I think has a threesome as a three way. We
really crushed it. It was just great to get someone
living in Los Angeles to do to do a podcast. Yeah,
well guess what, it's not stopping there. No, I think
we're open to hearing more from you, Will about other
people you like the you like the first suggestion. I think.
So the trial run was successful. Will okay, and so however,
(01:14):
you need to possession yourself the room. Am I getting
yelled at right now? Okayed? I had my sugar free
red Bull with my As you can see, I'm in
process on my breakfast and the fact that you guys
are so early it doesn't even bump me, do you, guys?
I'm sorry, I have some Athletic Greens. You guys want
some that powder that Tim Ferris loves. This here here,
let me just crack over a can here get Thanks
(01:37):
for handing it to me. Good object work everyone, And
this is this is Athletic Greens. It's got all your
vitamins and all your sort of nutrients in one drink
in the morning. Sorry, I just I think I think
we should just do a beverage every time I'm feeling
this is this is uh, it's it's tastes better than
you think it's gonna taste. Absolutely, but it doesn't taste good. No.
(02:00):
And you know, speaking of the five senses, because taste
is one of them, Let's talk about things we can hear, Hey,
dream us of something here? This is very interesting. Okay.
I don't know if you guys are familiar with Martin
so funny This is just I'm so happy you said
the name Martin because I've been wanted to see something
(02:20):
from him. Yeah, great young talent, and he was tough
to get. I'm not gonna lie, I don't. I'm not
surprised you guys are gonna have to send over some swag,
just duly duly warned, or are some more of the greens.
But he is a hip Latino comedian, writer satirist. He's
(02:40):
performed on Jimmy Kimmel Live, one of the Great Jimmy's
Comedy Central w channel. Now Guess what. Guess what? The
title of his his projects called, let me guess. Don
Sealdvar there Don sell Devar, who is a recently paroled
sleazy game show host. He puts audience members to the
(03:02):
test through multiple intense games to win money and is respect.
It's like we have our own wheel of fortune. It's
like we have our own wheel of fortune, our own cash. Caberne,
who wants to be a millionaire. My imagination is running wild.
C Well, I think you might be honest something here, guys.
I'm just you know, I'm just going with my gut.
(03:23):
You know, I'm just so pleased that you guys are happy,
because I know when you're not happy, it's not fun around. Yeah,
it gets real violent here. You only you only know
that anecdotally because we've never actually been angry at you
just heard. Yeah, and keep telling people. Okay, we want
to be feared. Okay, Marcavelli, who Machiavelli us us. Let's
(03:46):
take a listen to Martin. Yeah, yeah, this is done. Saldivar. Hello,
and welcome to the Weakest Loser. I'm your host, Don Saldivar,
and in your ears, aren't being women to you? And
by that, I mean they aren't playing tricks? Now. I
know it wasn't too long ago that I quit my
(04:08):
other game show, Big Saturday. But the good men and
people here at Clown Parade we're lucky enough to get
me after an intense bidding war, despite any rumors you
might have heard that no one wanted to hire me
after all of those articles came out. But enough about gossip.
We're here to play a game tonight. Three contestants play
(04:30):
for the chance to win dollars and cents. Let's meet
our contestants now, all right, Contestant number one, what's your name? No,
I'm oz Band. Oh no, I'm crazy me too, alright.
Contestant number two, what's your name Rebecca? Nor Rebecca? And
(04:54):
what's something interesting about yourself? Just kidding? Next contestant, what's
your name Francis Siski? Oh, you know, my wife wanted
to name our baby that, but that's why I left her.
All right, Now that that's out of the way, let
me explain the rules. In round number one, each of
you will take turns answering a series of general knowledge
(05:15):
trivia questions. At the end of the round, if you
have the least amount of points, we will throw a
seventy pound dumbbell at you. If you can't catch it
with only one hand, you will be eliminated. Alright, any
questions perfect, Then we'll start round number one of the
(05:39):
weakest loser. All right, we have three minutes on the
clock starting now. No, I have the lyrics tattooed above
my ass. But who wrote the song girl You'll be
a Woman suit? Neil Diamond correct one for noam alright, Rebecca,
(06:01):
which popular nineties sitcom star dated a high school student
during the fifth season of his self titled television show,
sign felt correct, Francis. Some people might think that when
you boil a lobster. You can hear them screaming, but
that noise is actually the lobster going yay we I
(06:24):
love this. But the casual dining restaurant Red Lobster is
known for their what kind of biscuits? Cheese biscuits? I'm
gonna need a slightly more specific answer. Francis cheddar Cheddar
cheese so close? Like Cheddar, I need an exact location
(06:44):
of the Cheddar montsego Is. Fortunately, we can't accept that
cheddar bay Cheddar cheddar Bay biscuits. Alright? Went wrong for
Francis Noah, I love Pepe, which is, of course my
acronym for which children's television show that features six rescue
(07:05):
dogs and a cute young man named writer uh uh
pp dogs so close? I wish I could pitch that show,
but that it is Paw Patrol, Paw Patrol. Alright, Rebecca,
I think the guy from the Da Vinci Code who
(07:26):
whips himself on the back is kind of hot. But
which author wrote the novel The da Vinci Code at
Davincy so close? Dan Brown? Dan Brown? Alright, Francis Naked
and afraid is more than just the only thing I
wrote on my dating profile. It's also a television show
(07:49):
and on the show Naked and Afraid, how many days
are the contestants left Naked and Afraid? Thirty? It's thirty
days twenty one? Are you kidding? Too confident for that?
Wrong of an answer? All right, No, I'm this author
loved to date teenagers. Okay, I'll narrow it down for you.
He also wrote a book called The Catcher in the Rye.
(08:12):
Oh god. J. D. Salinger? Correct, all right, Rebecca. If
I were a star constellation and I wanted to make
myself orgasm, I'd probably use Who's belt? Correct? All right,
Francis Brittney Spears dad seems like a really cool guy.
(08:38):
But which YouTuber went viral for their video leave Brittany Alone?
Oh man, I don't know his name? John John John
Brittany Alone. Guy, unbelievably close. Chris Crocker, Chris Crocker. Okay,
and that is the end of round number one. Wow,
(09:02):
what an exciting round. How does everybody feel? Defeat it? Oh? Well,
then everything is going right on track. All right. I'm
tabulating the score now, and unfortunately, Francis, you have the
least amount of points if you don't catch this seventy
(09:22):
pound dumbbell using only one hand. You are eliminated. Are
you ready? Catch? I didn't get so close. Francis, you
are the weakest loser. Get out of here, you weak,
weak loser. Hello, loser. Now that you lost, let's get
(09:46):
your thoughts. How did you feel about how everything went down? Honestly,
I I don't feel too bad because the questions I
got wrong are questions that I don't think I should know,
So I don't feel too too terrible. Yeah. What do
you think about the host of the show, Dawn Oh Man,
(10:08):
I'm a huge fan of Dawn's man. Donna was his
so solids are ya? Don He's a he's intense man,
um intense presence. He has a musk that is kind
of hard to get out of your nose, but worth it,
you know. Nice guy. Oh, what an exciting turn of events.
(10:32):
But things are only going to get more exciting when
I drink tequila. Dearie, these messages, m h m hm
m all right, we're back. Let's get to meet our contestants.
(10:55):
Just a little bit more. No, I'm it says here,
someone you love is keeping a terrible secret from you.
Tell us more. I have a fifteen month old kid,
and I suspect dark things? Why because he's stone walling me.
I look at him and he won't say any of them.
M that makes sense. I wouldn't trust you with much either. No,
(11:16):
just from the quick vibes I've gotten off of you
since round number one. All right, and Rebecca, I hear
people like to laugh at you behind your back? What's
that about? Just my day to day being. People watched
me and just laugh as I go about my work
and my daily activities. And what do you do for
work or daily activities? I work in tech. Oh, no,
(11:39):
more questions? All right, enough talking to you. Time to
play another round of the Weakest Loser. We have more
general knowledge trivia questions coming your way. But in this round,
we are throwing a seventy one pound dumbbell at the
player with the least amount of points. If you fail
(12:02):
to catch the dumbbell using only one hand, you are eliminated.
Are you ready? Yeah? This time we're gonna put four
minutes on the clock. All right, here we go. No
(12:23):
on al Gore more like Al Snore, That boring ass
bitch made a documentary about climate change called What an
Inconvenient Truth? Correct Rebecca. Hmm Bob bad bad bad baby
Dad Bob bad? Oh? Yeah yeah, m Bob? Who sings
(12:49):
that song? I don't know before my Hansom handsome? Alright,
what's wrong for Rebecca? No on my Ataconda. Don't want
none unless you got what hon buns? Correct Rebecca, Virgin Atlantic.
I'd rather fly the Atlantic? But who founded the company?
(13:13):
Virgin Atlantic? H Virgin Mary? Oh, I wish that is
Richard Branson My Virgin Mary. Rebecca off to a horrible start, Noah.
Although actor Mark Ruffalo is mostly known for playing the
hero in which movie, did he play a journalist at
(13:35):
the Boston Globe? Uh? Spotlight? Correct? All right, Rebecca, you
gotta get back in the game. I've never been more
upset at anything in my entire life. But the female
lad Ghostbusters reboot saw a reunion between Bridesmaids co stars
Kristin Wig and who Uh Melissa McCarthy correct, act alright,
(14:01):
Rebecca getting back in the game. No, I hear she's
difficult to work with. But the sequel to which animated
film is adding the character of an infant executive named
Tina Templeton boss Baby correct alright, Rebecca Yokioo Taco Bell,
which Latino American civil rights activist co founded the National
(14:24):
farm Workers Association and posthumously received the Presidential Medal of
Freedom in nineteen ninety four. If no clue, do you
even repeat it? Yokiero Taco Bell, actual, Latino American civil
rights activist co founded the National farm Workers Association and
posthumously received the Presidential Medal of Freedom in nineteen ninety four.
(14:46):
Pass so close, he got boss Baby and I got
chaves to me, They're one and the same. Alright, No weird.
The rock band Kansas was formed in which US state
um ah man uh Nebraska, Kansas? That is unfortunate? Alright, Rebecca.
(15:19):
In the song Famous, the lyrics state quote I made
that bitch famous. Who is the quote bitch in which
musician Kanye West is referring to correct? All right? No,
I'm I've never played tennis before, but I could probably
win against Serena Williams six to oh. But the current
(15:41):
top ranked women's tennis player, Ashley Bartie is from which country? Uh, France?
Basically the same Australia. All right, and Rebecca, she may
be the definition of pure evil, But which feminist icon
(16:03):
founded Miss Magazine and the Women's Media Center. Um, I
have no clue. Um, Randa Priestley, So so close? Glorious Steinhum,
Glorious steinhum. Alright, Wow, what an exciting round that was? Wow?
(16:29):
How does everybody feel? No? I'm I feel good. I
feel good. I boss baby, say no more? All right, Rebecca,
how do you feel after an intense second round? I
feel heinous right now? What makes you feel so heinous
because you didn't know? Cess our drives or Glorious Steinhum? Yes,
(16:51):
I wish I got the anaconda question, lad, luck of
the draw? All right, I'm tabulating the score right now,
and unfortunately, Rebecca, you have the least amount of points.
You are the weakest loser. Here is a seventy one
pound weight catch. No, that was so close. That was
(17:12):
so close. While unfortunately, because you couldn't catch that with
only one hand, you are eliminated. Get out of my sight,
you week week loser by Hello, a loser. Now that
you lost, let's get your thoughts. How did you feel
about how everything went down? Defeated, devastated, heartbroken? What are
(17:37):
you going to do now? Go back to school? I
have a lot to learn in history specifically, all right, no,
I have you made it to the final round? Will
you win big? Or will you walk away small? Weak
and a loser? Find out when we return to the
(18:01):
weakest loser and we are back. Wow, what an exciting
first two rounds we've had. We're going into the final
(18:21):
round with no. I'm no, I'm you made it to
the final round? How are you feeling? I feel excited,
I feel nervous. I am worried about smashing my right
hand on the Have you wait if I don't do well? Oh,
don't worry about that. We've never had anybody get hurt
and sued us before, so you know. I don't know
(18:43):
if it's the n d as we make them sign beforehand,
or what's keeping us afloat. But no, M I gotta ask,
have you ever want anything in your life? I have? UM?
I have? I actually say no more. All right, let's
get into a final round. No, I'm I'm going to
ask you ten general knowledge trivia questions. If you get
(19:11):
three questions wrong, you walk away with nothing except for
the one hundred pound dumbbell we will be throwing at you,
and if you can't catch it with one hand, you
won't be allowed to keep it. But if you make
it to the end of all ten questions, you will
win dollars and sense. All right, no, I'm are you
(19:38):
ready to get into it? Let's do this, all right?
No time on the clock. You just have ten questions.
You've got to make it through. Noam, Your question number
one is I got kicked out of school because I
wouldn't stop calling Abraham Lincoln of virtue signaling cock. But
Abraham Lincoln served as a member of the House of
Representatives for m which US state? Um from the capital
(20:04):
of the country, Illinois? That is correct? All right? One
for normal question number two, I'd love to perform a
fatality on my wife, if you know what I mean.
But which video game first released in the nineteen nineties
featured fatalities? Uh? Grand Theft Auto so close? Mortal Kombat,
(20:29):
Mortal Kombat. Alright, that's one strike, but you're still in
the game, noam h. In December of nineteen fifty eight,
NASA sent an animal named Gordo into space. Gordo did
not survive. But what kind of animal was Gordo? A primate?
(20:49):
At chimpanzee? It says here monkey, so im and accepted
all right. No, Question number four. Tilla come is my
safe word. But tilla come is also the name of
a whale seen slowly dying in which documentary. Oh um
um ah, blackfish. Correct. Don't don't sound so unsure of yourself.
(21:15):
That is absolutely correct. You sounded like you were just
making that up off the top of your head. But no,
that is absolutely right. And then it would have been
really awkward if that wasn't actually the name of the movie.
Here alright, noam. Question number five Dora the Explorer or
is it's known in the US? Dora the Explorer premiered
on which television network, PBS, so Close, Nickelodeon, Colodeon. No,
(21:43):
I'm that is strike two. You're on question number six.
If you get one more wrong, you are walking away
with nothing. How do you feel about that? Well, hopefully
I get to walk away with a hundred pound bell. Well,
if you can't catch it with one hand, you won't
be able to keep it. But no, I'm there's a
lot writing on these next ship five questions. Here we go.
(22:06):
I always thought it was a vagina, but it's actually
pac Man's mouth. But I'm sure it's a vagina. On
the female version of pac Man, whose exact name is
what Mrs pac Man? Oh it is Ms pac Man.
(22:27):
I don't see a ring on that vagina. No, I'm
you are the weakest of the losers. But of course
I'm gonna throw this one d pound dumbell at you.
That's my good hand. Hello, a loser. Now that you lost,
(22:53):
let's get your thoughts. How did you feel about how
everything went down? It's heartbreaking. Its five questions away from
glory and now I'm a loser. I'm gonna turn to
my fifteen month old kid. Is he keeping secrets from me?
I'm gonna say, your dad's a loser. He's gonna just
look at me because the stone walls. What do you
think about the host of the show. Um, he made
(23:18):
me giddy, he made me happy, and then he broke
my heart. Then he broke my heart. So don can
rotten heell? What are you going to do now? Um
gonna sit that fifteen month old down. I'm gonna look
him in the eye and say, it's time for you
to start telling me secrets. It's time to start letting
(23:39):
it all out. No diapers until you tell me secrets. Son,
h A right, that's our show. Thanks for listening and
until next time, always remember those vicious rumors about me
are completely true. Good Night, m.
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