September 14, 2023 • 42 mins
In this episode of Comeback Stories, Darren and Donny reunite with Trent Shelton, the former NFL player who reshaped his life as a motivational speaker. Join them as they revisit Trent's upbringing in New Orleans and the transformative moments that defined his journey. Delve into 'the dark work' as Trent and Darren share their personal battles with instant gratification and self-numbing. Trent's poignant reflections on coping with the loss of his mother provide profound insights into the 'art of fulfillment.' Don't miss this empowering episode that encourages you to release your potential and rekindle your passion for life.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:04):
Come Back Stories is a production of Inflection Network and iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
What's going on, everyone, It's Darren Waller tying in from
the New York Giants, excited to welcome you guys back
to another episode to come Back Stories. I'm here with
my boy, my brother, my man Donnie.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
Donnie. How you doing today, Bro?
Speaker 4 (00:21):
I'm doing well. Welcome everyone.
Speaker 5 (00:24):
Yeah, it's great to be here, great to be carrying
the message of recovery, healing, transformation, and that's exactly what
we're going to do today on our episode with our
guest Trent Shelton, who is actually coming back for round two.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
Trent, how you doing, my man? Man?
Speaker 3 (00:41):
I'm doing good, you know. Thanks for having me, Donnie
and Darren. And it's always great to come back, you know,
to a podcast. So I'm grateful for you guys having me.
Speaker 4 (00:51):
Since the last episode.
Speaker 5 (00:53):
There's been a lot of adversity, a lot of pain,
a lot of change, a lot of loss in your life.
So I think I'll ask you the same question I
just asked you, but maybe with a little bit more
sincerity of how are you doing?
Speaker 3 (01:09):
I'm good in this current moment. It's been a tough
season for me over the last few years. But you know,
I've been able to battle a lot of things mentally, spiritually,
and it's laying my relationship closer to God even even more,
it's allowed me to sit down with this injury and
be able to connect and focus on the things that
really matter. So I would say, even in this storm,
(01:32):
it's definitely helped me find just goodness in my life
and focus on the things that truly matter.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
What do you feel like matters that maybe didn't matter before?
Speaker 3 (01:41):
Yeah, just man, just presence, Like you know, my family
obviously matter before, but just even you know, losing my
mother and then my grandmother, all these things that happened,
it just made me realize, like, you know, we don't
have forever. You know, fever comes with an expiration, dayton.
So it's made me sit down and be able to
enjoy the small things and things that really matter. The
(02:01):
memories that could be made, whether playing outside of my
key kids, are going to a trip, or just doing
the most random things that mean everything. Because when I
look back on my life, it's those moments that were
so simple. I call it simple happiness that I missed
so much. With those I can't create it no more
so that simple happiness bug has bit me, and I'm
like super excited about creating simple moments that mean everything.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
I feel like you have the perspective to be able
to enjoy the simple moments that come from an adverse
situation like this, because a lot of people may not
know that you've been facing pretty substantial adversity much of
your life. Could you take us through some of your
childhood and some of the adversity that you faced early
on for people that haven't heard your story.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Yeah, for sure, just childhood wise. You know, my child
was pretty good. I grew up in Louisiana, the youngest
of two older brothers. My biggest adversity was the thing
of like having two older brothers, and I always had
this success guilt where it's like, man, the attention is
all on me, but those guys helped me become who
(03:04):
I was, Like it was always me versus them playing
football and basketball, But it was always that thing of like, man,
I don't want all their attention. And I think honestly
that instilled a fear of success for me my whole
entire life, even now working through this, because it's like, man,
if I'm successful, like what am I going to lose?
Are people going to be jealous? Or all these things?
And so I had to work through that limited belief.
(03:25):
And my biggest adversity was sports man after college, you know,
going to NFL as a free agent and bouncing around
getting cut eight or nine times, being very unsure of
my situation, you know, day to day, you know, coming
off the practice field and getting released and like, oh,
what I'm going to do now? So that was tough,
and that process me just having a son, like how
am I going to provide for my son? Who am
I without the sport? So that was the hardest thing
(03:47):
of my life, trying to find an identity outside of
something that's been my identity my whole life.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
I'd like to.
Speaker 5 (03:52):
Ask real quick on the success guild thing, just from
a personal level. When you said those two words, that
really resonated with me on a lot of levels. Just
I had that same thing growing up, and how to
a brother a year and a half older than me
who achieved a ton of success, like more than most athletically,
let's say, but maybe compared to me, it wasn't as successful,
(04:17):
And so oftentimes I would find myself very uncomfortable receiving
that acknowledgment, and I've seen that show up in my
life later on, where when I am acknowledged, I often
want to diminish or dim my light, if you will.
So I'm curious for you, like, how have you seen
that show.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Up for you later?
Speaker 5 (04:39):
And what was some of the work you did to
release that old story?
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Yeah? Man, I think even right now, just being totally transparent,
I'm still working through that because all the compliments that
I get are you helped me do this, or you
help me do that, and all the accolades, which really
doesn't do anything for me, and I've always kind of
downplayed it and pushed it away. And I realized that
in my mind that really helped me this. I was like, man,
(05:05):
I'm not being grateful for the blessings God gave me,
you know what I mean? Like I should be able
to under those blessings and feel good about it because
the people in my life that are truly happy for me,
they're going to be happy for my success, happy for
my happiness. And I realized that the wrong people, yeah,
they might have a problem with it, and that those
aren't my people. And so I've learned to really acknowledge
(05:25):
it I've learned to accept it, and it's really helped
me because I felt like in me not accepting the
recognition or whatever it may be, it was almost like
my purpose and my gift became a burden in a sense,
and I was like, I never wanted that to be
a thing. So I acknowledge it, but always point it
back to God as the reason of who I am
(05:46):
and the purpose he asked for my life. And that's
really helped me. But to be totally transparent something I
struggle with to this day.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I want to stay on what you said about people
thanking you for what you've done for them. I want
to ask you, do you feel like it's easy to
slip into like being so caught up and helping other
people that sometimes when it's time to maybe help yourself
that it may be a little difficult Because I find myself.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
In that area.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Sometimes I'm like people of addiction, like I do so
much for them, I speak so much into the lives
of people with mental health awareness, and I'm, you know,
kind of like out here on the front lines of it.
But then sometimes it's like when it comes to my
own things, sometimes I feel like I kind of struggle
do you feel.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
That way at all? A thousand percent man? And this
was exposed to me. It was I don't know who
it was and said this. It might have been like
ay Mini or something like that, but he had said
in a tweet that like he has talked about God
so much to other people that he's forgetting to actually
talk to God for himself. And that resonated me, like
(06:46):
on a spiritual level, but also on the personal level.
It's like, Yeah, I'm doing all these things for everybody else,
I'm pouring in everybody else. I'm making sure everybody else
is straight, and I'm not giving that to myself, right
And so I'm kind of the season right now, and
it seems like a selfish season, but it's not as
more self aware. It's just like being my unapologetically, my
unapologetic season where I'm really focusing on me so I
(07:06):
can be the best me for the world, for the
people who follow me, for my family, and making sure
that I'm giving to myself what I'm trying to instill
in them. So it's a process, man, that I'm working through.
But I realized when I didn't do that, my cup
was super empty and I was running on fumes. So
I think it's important to sit back and relax, have
(07:28):
time to disconnect for yourself. And so for me that's
early in the morning, late at night. I call it
reflection therapy. To be able to give myself in my
life what I need.
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Wow, I think that's amazing.
Speaker 5 (07:39):
And this just reaffirms why Darren and I wanted to
start this podcast where they may see two or three
individuals up here talking that ultimately are preaching these things
and teaching these things. And I think you get like
sixty million listeners every week that are listening to you
(07:59):
do your thing. But I think it's important to remember
that we are as teachers or coaches, that we are
still tripping over the same things that we're teaching all
the time. Like we are in this work with you
every single day.
Speaker 3 (08:13):
Absolutely. I mean, once you stop being a student, then
you stop learning. You know, even if I'm teaching, I
tell people all the time and they say, like, how
did you know I'm going through this? And I was like,
nine out of ten either I've been through it or
I'm going through it right now. I'm just sharing my
experience with it. And so I never positioned myself as
an expert, like I'm an expert to this expert of that,
(08:35):
my expertise is just going through this progression of life,
and I'm sharing my journey with you. Yes, it's some
things I might know a little bit more about, but
I'm sharing and being an open book. And I think
that's what you know you talked about the sixty million.
I think that's what has allowed me to be successful
is I'm not at the mountaintop telling you how to
get up here, right even if I've been up there, cool,
(08:55):
but I'm like back down this struggle with you. And
so even over the last few years, me being open
and sharing my journey of like, this is what I'm
dealing with, this is what I'm going through, but also
this is how I'm getting through it in real time.
And I know that builds a connection with those that
follow you, those that watch you, because it's like we're
inspired by perfection, but we're impacted through truth, through purpose,
(09:18):
through progression. So I'm always trying to show people like, yeah,
this is what I'm going through right now, and this
is how I'm getting through it, no doubt.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Man, There's three students that are on this conversation right now,
that's for sure. But I want to ask you two guys,
because I know you guys could be teachers on this
one subject. I know both of you guys had to
reach a point where it was a transformation of your
identity from leaving your sports and the pain that that caused.
(09:47):
I know there are a lot of people out there
that may have certain dreams or see themselves doing certain things,
and for some reason or another, they have to go
into a different direction, and that separation is tough, That
transition is tough. Can you speak to some of the
emotions that come and what it looked like practically to
kind of cut your way through everything that may have
(10:08):
been trying to hold you right where you were.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
That's the hardest journey that I faced, for sure, is
trying to understand who I am without that identity put
on my name right and it's just very, very hard.
And you know, as an athlete, I mean, I talk
to athletes all the time, and that's some of the
things that I help them work through. It's like, man,
there's more to your life, and we hear these things,
but sometimes we don't want it to be more to
(10:32):
our life. I know I didn't at that time. Simply put,
for me, it came with me facing my reality first, right,
my reality is that this is over my realities. I
don't even love it no more my realities. I'm just
in it because I don't know what else to do
with my life, and so there has to be another chapter.
And my biggest fear man was not having another chapter
(10:52):
to my life outside of this, and so I faced
that reality. I dealt with it. Always say you'll never
win your war by running from your battle. So that
was hard. And then after I faced my reality to
release some things in my life, you know, and whatever
that looked like at the time, maybe it was my circle,
maybe it was the identity, and I had to burn
those bridges where I knew I couldn't go back. I
(11:14):
had to move forward. The last part of the process
is the repair process. And you know, we have these
voids in our life, but we have to be able
to repair, and repair to me means putting the strength
back into a weakness. And that was a very hard process,
but I ended up finding my purpose. I said, okay, well,
what qualities can I take from this thing that I
(11:35):
spent so much of my life on and apply this
to my real life perseverance, endurance, how to deal with adversity,
hard work, all the things that we learn as athletes.
And I say, you know what, I want to put
this into my current work. And at first, you know,
it wasn't nothing happening, right, It wasn't like it was
an external like validation and this is it for your life.
But I always tell people this and simply put for me,
(11:58):
because I get this question a lot, like how did
you know like this transition was right for you? And
the best way I can put it is it was
the piece in the midst of uncertainty, in the midst
of chaos in my soul that I knew this was
what I was created to do, even though there was
no external like validation of it. Internally, I knew that
(12:19):
this was I was created to do. And once I
really locked into that and stripped away, and I'm still
stripping away, like I still miss sports. I still that's
why I tore my achilles now thinking I'm an athlete
still and trying to play my nephew outside in basketball
in that rupture. But I'm still working through that process.
But now I realize that, man, you know, there is
something more to my life because I listened to that
(12:39):
piece and not necessarily my circumstances at that time.
Speaker 5 (12:43):
Man, hearing your shift into this other identity, into this
other life, it just it gets me thinking about how
rare that is and how many people don't find a
way out. And for me, the transformation happened because of
an addiction and because my life was so painful, so
(13:03):
self destruct hurting so many other people that I had
to surrender. But that's not where like this new identity
and this new purpose came from for me. Like I've
heard your quotes say, your transparency leads to transformation, And
that was the moment. It was like progressing and gaining
(13:24):
these spiritual tools, becoming a yoga teacher, becoming a coach,
and then ultimately sharing my story, sharing the pain, sharing
the shit. That was the moment that I shared that
at this event, like everything changed for me. But I'm
so grateful that I was able to find a way
out because I work with and talk to so many
people that haven't found a way out or never found
(13:47):
a way out and ultimately ended their lives through addiction
or mental health or suicide because of it. So for
me to be sitting on here with you two and
just knowing Trent, you're.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
Doing all the same work. You didn't have the addiction.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
You found a way and kind of had that awareness
encouraged to step into it. But it's it's been the
greatest gift and now to be able to teach that
back to athletes, like I mean, Darren was one of
the first ones that actually completely stepped totally into this,
and you know, he was doing music and you know
now the podcast and his foundation and he has all
(14:23):
these other things. So football is just a platform to
reach people, you know, and I'm speaking.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
For him right now, but it's so much bigger than that.
Speaker 5 (14:33):
And all you got to do is just look at
what number he is this year for the New York
Football Giants and that says everything.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Yeah, that's major. And I want to just ask even
Darren on this like question because I'm just curious, like
what's your transition because I noticed that about you and
I love it how you know, you have so many
different faces that you're like, you know, yes, I'm a
football player, cool, but you know these are the things
that I care about. WHI while I have this platform,
I'm going to push these things, Like is it tough
(15:00):
doing that, you know, like, is it ever from the
fans like, oh, like you should be focused on this
or that, or you should be a football player because
I know the box put like, how how do you
handle that part of it? I'm just curious. Yeah, there
is that. That is a reality.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
So if we look at just like music, for example,
I've been doing music since I got suspended from the
league for over a year in twenty seventeen, I was
really locking it on music and I put an album
out when I was in Oakland in twenty nineteen, and
that was when like I really started taking off and
making a name for myself and my performance on the field.
(15:38):
And I was playing every game and doing well, and
people were like, oh, the music is the music is dope,
Like they're playing in the stadium, Like nobody was really
saying anything.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
You get a couple of.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
People that was like, all stick to football, like but
that that's that is what it is. But this past season,
I was putting out videos and stuff like that that
I had filmed in the summer before training camp even started,
and I think I put one out. I'd already scheduled
to put it out, like on a Friday and it
was after we had played like a Thursday.
Speaker 3 (16:07):
Game and didn't win the game and I.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Had been injured, and so people were like, what is this,
Like you don't care about the game, you don't care
about the craft, and and so that that kind of
became a theme. I think like people kind of like
picked up on that and like it just became like
a cool thing to do, and it's and it's tough,
you know. So it's like, you know, people look at
your performance and it's like, if you're performing to my
(16:33):
liking and entertaining me to the level that I would like,
I'm gonna let you live. I'm gonna let you do
what you do. But if you're not, nah, we need
to we need to stick to your day job. And
you know, people don't really know that I'm not doing
the music to be popular or to have this brand.
Like this is just me doing something that I love
to do, I would do for free, I would do
if I never posted it again. And it's just a
(16:55):
great balance from everything that football demands, you know. And
so I've received that. I've received that with a lot
of things. And you got to kind of learn to
focus in and be like a lot of these people
are came in because of the performance.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Some people are here for me, but some people are
here for the performance.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
If the performance isn't always there, because I'm an imperfect
human being and it's not always going to be that way,
you got to risk being able to lose some of
that because that's not the deep, affectionate, unconditional love that
we long for. That's and we have to be able
to find ways to differentiate from that. But that's not
to say it wasn't like a little bit stung a
(17:37):
little bit, you know, because these are people that were
your fans and support you and and all that. But
it's all learning, it's all recognizing like, okay, like this
is what it is.
Speaker 3 (17:47):
But I can't let.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
It deter me from doing what I feel called to
do because I feel like I have a voice in
this music. I feel like I have a voice in
these activities that I do. I'm not just out here
putting out a whole bunch of nonsense, you know. I
feel like I have something to say and I want
to communicate it in the way that I want to
communicate it. But also at the same time, everything that
I do, like Donnie a quote you ought to say
that I love is how you do something is how
(18:09):
you do everything. And so I'm going to be excellent
in everything that I do and not short one area
to put more time and effort into another, and just
stand tall on my convictions and feel good about what
I see when I look in the mirror. And because
I spent way too much of my life worried about
what other people's opinions were of me.
Speaker 5 (18:27):
Well, there's a lot there bro a couple things Darren
touched on. Well, when I hear you so clearly articulate
how you stay focused, how you find your center, like
that shit doesn't happen overnight, and it doesn't it doesn't
come with a ton of work and discipline and focus
and whatever the practices are that you've had, and continue it,
(18:48):
continue to level up to find those practices right to
be able to eliminate the noise, and yeah, the dedication
that you've had to find that and a lot of
it is also getting to the core wound of this
like not enough, not black enough, different story, right, And
I wanted to actually segue that into trends story because
(19:12):
I think Trent, I've heard you say before that the
first time that you ever felt like you weren't enough
was when you got drafted, right.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
Yeah, absolutely, yeah, Well I wasn't. I wasn't drafting right,
So I was waiting two days. I was supposed to
fifth or sixth round, but it didn't happen. And that
was the first moment of my life where you know,
obviously I was telling everybody I was good, I was okay,
I'm not worried about it, but deep down inside I
was hurt. I was like, man, like, am I not
good enough? Like, you know, I put up the numbers,
(19:42):
like I ran when I was supposed to run, Like
what's up? And at that moment, I was like, man,
maybe I'm not cut out for this. And I went
through a little bit of what I now know like
a small form of depression until my phone rang, you know,
as a hot paraty free agent, and then that that
shift happened. Even going in there, you know, you're starting
off the bottom of the totem poles. So even then
(20:03):
I'm like, man, like, am I even supposed to be here?
It's like the first time in my life where I
questioned my skills, my ability, and just myself in general.
Speaker 4 (20:11):
How dark did that get?
Speaker 5 (20:12):
Like what was the bottom or the darkest place that
not enough story or that maybe just the transition if
you even fast forward to when you knew football wasn't
going to be a reality, Like where did you go?
Speaker 3 (20:26):
Yeah, so I went to the things that I probably
shouldn't have went to, you know. I went to the drugs, alcohol,
the club and all the things that numbed it, you
know what I mean. And I was saying that was
self care, right, that was my thing. I'm just taking
care of myself, right, that's the self care that I
thought was self care at the time, But really it
was me running from my reality at the time, and
(20:48):
my lowest point had to be well two thousand and nine,
and you know I've told this story before, but you know,
I was with the Seahawks that released me, and I
was back home in Dallas. They called me and say, hey,
like we want you to come, you know, up here.
So I rush home from Dallas to Fortworth. It's about
like a forty five minute drive through some stuff in
the suitcase. You know, I'm on Facebook at the time.
Tell everybody I'm going back, you know, I tell my parents,
(21:10):
everybody's happy. I get to the airport, and I can
laugh about it now. I wasn't laughing at but I
can get to the airport, and I get to the
airport and you know that two o six number calls
and I'm like it's weird, okay, hey this like have
you left yet? And I was like nah, and it
was like, well, we have the plans on things like
don't leave, like we'll bring you back later, and they
never brought me back. So at that moment, I was like, like,
(21:31):
I was so hurt, and I was like, man, you know,
I felt like that door had shut. I didn't love
the game anymore or anything like that, and I just
really felt like, man, you know what, I'm just gonna
live my life. I'm gonna just do the things that
I know make me feel good. And I ran to
those things, and obviously that just feeled avoid temporarily and
(21:51):
doed me in a deeper depression.
Speaker 5 (21:53):
What we suppress turns into depression. Right, that's another one
of your lines. I mean, there's a lot of stuff
as I'm revisiting our conversation and just how much First
I want to just reac anology for how much of
an inspiration you've been in my life and always showing
up and then watching you on stage live, Like, there's
a lot of motivational speakers out there, but Trent's like
(22:14):
on a whole other level in addition to the level
of authenticity just his stage presence and then what he's
talking about is I mean, you've always just spoken right
right straight to my heart. So thank you for that, man, and.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
I appreciate it. Man.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
I want to I want to enlighten the people about
what you talked about on our first conversation was the
dark work. I don't think people may know about that
or have an adequate definition of what that is. Could
you explain that to everybody else listening.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
Yeah, it's just the work that you're doing in the dark.
It's that work that doesn't get celebrated, you know, the athlete.
I'm telling this to my son. We worked out this
morning in the garage, and like, this is the work
that sucks, right, but you fall in love with this
work because this is the work that when you show
up on the field and you're doing the thing, people
call you lucky, but they don't know that you're putting
this dark work over time. And so whether it's sports
(23:06):
or whether it's mentally it's the prayers, is to getting
into your word's to reading the books and things that
aren't sexy that nobody sees. It's the working on your craft.
It's to being addicted to the mastery right in your
craft and really putting your best foot forward with music,
whatever it may be, and nobody sees that process. But
then those are the things that really help you shine
the light, right, those are the things that people celebrate
(23:27):
you for, and those are things that people recognize you for.
So the dark work isn't sexy. I always say, progression
is an ugly role that leads to a beautiful place.
So now I get this all the time, bro, Like
they're like, oh man, your overnight success. It's like what
I've been doing this since two thousand and nine, Like
go look at the dark work of the videos on
YouTube where I'm like, ah, that's terrible, but I was
still proud of myself for stepping into that moment. So
(23:50):
that dark work, man, is the things that aren't celebrated,
But it's the reason that people will celebrate you. You
know maybe in two or three years or a year
when that harvest actually comes from the seed that you
plan it.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
Yeah, because there's so many in this world today, I
feel like dark work bankrupts this idea of a pain free,
completely comfortable, obstacle free experience that we all want, you know,
like no matter you know, even today, Like with the
discipline and practice I have in place, sometimes I wish
(24:22):
results and certain things would come faster than they do.
It's just kind of in us as human beings. But
I love that term and that idea because if we
could get that into young people earlier on, like this pain,
this suffering isn't breaking you, it's not gonna keep you down.
It's actually gonna help you build. It's actually gonna help
(24:44):
lay a foundation for anything that you're going to try
to do, anything that you any challenge you may come across.
If we could just circulate that message, I feel like
that could go a long way, more than anything else
you may explain, just like, hey, when you get to
something hard, go through it, stick with it, embrace because
(25:05):
one day you're going to look back on it and
be grateful for it, as opposed to run from it
or numb from it. It's a big deal because it's
all across my story. I'm a drug addict and alcoholic
in recovery because my addiction form because I didn't want
to feel things like That's really the basis behind my
(25:26):
using was I just don't want to go through that.
I don't want to feel this, get rid of this
as soon as possible. I don't want to have to
sit with it and deal with it and work through it.
And that's why I feel like this. Just the messaging
behind that is so universal. And I had to get
you to speak on that for a couple of minutes.
Speaker 3 (25:44):
For sure, Man, I appreciate that. And you said that
word suffering, like I think suffering comes with a negative thing,
Like yes, there's I would say, choose your suffering.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
There is a.
Speaker 3 (25:53):
Negative suffering that I like to say use it comes
from regret because you look back and like, man, I
wish I would have. But there's a positive suffering, right,
Suffering builds, Perseverance builds and do lareance builds faith. You know,
we have to go through our suffering, you know, in
order to get to certain things in our life. And
so I've been trying to even with myself and my
(26:14):
kids and the athletes I'm around are just people in general,
Like you know, there's certain things that You've got to
go through to be able to get to the thing
that you want. So this is a part of it.
So enjoy it, you know, I mean celebrate it. And
you know, sometimes it's hard for people that accept that,
but you know, I think when they look back and realize, like, oh,
this is the sacrifice I got to make in order
to get this, and they realize, you know, like this
(26:36):
is a part of the process in order to be great, it.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
Makes me think of another trend Shelton quote.
Speaker 5 (26:42):
That's the only way to harbor true strength is to
conquer the pain at its deepest level.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
And I'd love to ask.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
You, I can't imagine any more pain than the loss
of a parent, Like what has that been?
Speaker 4 (26:56):
Like what is the dark work.
Speaker 5 (26:58):
And the grief and how is that grief that grieving
process continuing to unfold as you really lean into that pain.
Speaker 3 (27:08):
Yeah, that's definitely the hardest thing ever, you know, losing mom,
and especially for me, Mom was, you know, my biggest supporter.
I always give her credit my dad to my dad
is phenomenal, but Mom was the was the one bringing
me with her to conferences and like instilling this in me.
And I even know that you know at such a
(27:29):
young age, and so seeing her go through her suffering,
you know, and the thing that I tell people, like
what really changed it for me? You know when you
see man stuff, when you see your mom you know,
for six months, you know, in hospice, and she's still
keeping faith. Like she had brain cancer, she had breast cancer,
she had liver cancer, and she's still keeping her faith.
(27:52):
And it's like this is a different type of faith
that I've never seen. She's still thanking God even when
she's dying. And the day that she passed, you know,
I got to call at four him in the morning.
I already knew what it was. My dad called me
and I went over there and I had just seen
her two days before that and she had her hardest day,
like she was struggling to breathe everything, Like I thought
(28:13):
I was gonna lose her in that moment. And when
I went over there after she passed, just looked at
so much at peace. And the thing that I told
my mom on that Friday before she passed, I said, Mom,
you're healing. You know what I mean, It's okay, you're healing.
You don't have to fight like you're healing it's good.
And she left that Saturday night early Sunday morning. And
when you see somebody you know with a body bag
(28:35):
and put it in the you know, the hearse, it's
just reality. And so I made my mom this promise
to take care of everybody, and I put that burden
on myself and I wasn't even allowing myself to heal
because I was making sure everybody else was okay. And
it got to a point, man, where I was looking
in the mirror one day, and this is what really
turned I call it my grief into my greatness. And
(28:57):
there's days, bro even today, like when I'm about being
on stage, let me text my mom, or fourth of July,
like I'm like, dang, it's the reality is she's not here,
but she's still here more than ever. And I remember,
probably a year after she passed, Man, I was in
the bathroom and I remember looking in the mirror and
I was at a very very very low point, very
(29:21):
low point. Nobody would know because I was smiling for
the camera, you know, but I was really dying behind
the scenes, as I say, And I just had this
thought and I thought about my kids, and I said,
man passed away. I wouldn't want to be the reason
why my kids gave up. I wouldn't want to be
the reason why they lived in the depression. I wouldn't
(29:42):
want to be the reason why they stopped going hard
like I would want to be the reason why they
went harder. You know what I mean? Do it for daddy,
You know what I mean. Let's go. And I sat
there and I said, man, my mom was such like
she worried about everything, bro Like she would call me
like like I pray for you to take out the
treasure you okay, Like she worried about everything. So I said,
I know my mom is worrying right now if she
(30:03):
can hap you know, happen to be able to see
this right she's worrying. She's sad because her baby boy
and even her boys like they're giving up. And at
that moment, I said, man, I felt these words and
I don't know if it's true to certainly, I said
my mother, Mom, I know you can't rest in peace
UNCEI I'm living in peace. And that switched everything for me.
(30:25):
I said, now was the moment where yes, I'm gonna
go through my hard times with grief, but I'm gonna
make sure she stays alive forever. I'm gonna make sure
the legacy is carried on. I'm gonna make sure generations
have we have generational healing, generational health, you know what
I mean. I'm gonna make sure of that. Because she
ran this race of life and I refuse to allow
that race to be in vain. I need to do
(30:46):
my part. So I got the baton and at that
moment it changed everything for me, just like that, And
now the tears are happy instead of sad tears.
Speaker 4 (30:55):
Wow, thank you for sharing that.
Speaker 5 (30:59):
I mean, I'm thinking about as you walked us through
that and hearing how she used to worry about everything.
But really, at the end, what most people are so
worried about dying, there was this unshakable faith where she
was mirroring, mirroring and modeling that unwavering faith when she
was about to leave this earth. So to be able
(31:21):
to plant that seed for you, And yeah, the way
that you turn around things and maybe this is something
that you've talked about before. Maybe you can touch on this.
Those those three questions that you'll you'll ask maybe if
you're needing, if you're stuck, or you're needing a perspective
shift with how am I going to respond what does
this mean to you? Or what does this mean to me?
And then how am I going to use it? And
(31:44):
then maybe touch on that last piece where you say,
instead of saying what does this mean, it's what is
this going to mean?
Speaker 4 (31:53):
So maybe you can touch on that.
Speaker 5 (31:55):
You can articulate it a lot better than I can,
but I'd love to hear about it.
Speaker 4 (31:59):
Now.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
That's it, man. You know I talk a lot about
if anybody can be a title I wwould say I
really help people like shift their perspective right from their
prison to their power. I think perspective is everything in life.
Speaker 4 (32:11):
Right.
Speaker 3 (32:11):
We can look at a thing and we can see
the worst in it or we can see the best
in it. And I've been living by these words because
of that, and it's a simple phrase that helps me shift.
And the words are it could be worse, it will
get better. So always tell myself that when I'm going
through a hard time, it could be worse, which you could,
it will get better. And that helps me shift into
(32:32):
my power of my in my perspective and so perspective
I like to tell people it's like a set of lenses, right,
it's like you're set of lenses of how you see
the world. We can't control the experiences most times, we
can control the meaning we give to the experience. So
I always say, like, life is not about what happens
to you, It's about the meaning that you give it, right,
(32:53):
It's about how you use it. If you're down at halftime,
you're not going to be like all this means that
you know, we ain't coming back as an athlete, we
know now this means we're gonna have a comeback. That's
what this means. We're gonna mean the Patriots with Atlanta.
This means we have the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history,
you know. So that is kind of the mindset that
I've taken to everything in my life. When something happens,
(33:15):
that's that's different right there.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
Man, that I read a quote a couple of days ago.
I think it's Mark Twain. It said, the ancestor of
an action is a thought, And like you just put
such great wording to it, because somebody can't write a
new story, write a comeback story without first a perspective
(33:41):
of this is worth writing, or I have the power
to write it. Experience and healing and wisdom is going
to come for me to write this story. And it's
a choice in every single moment, But a lot of
us we feel like there isn't one, or we aren't
present to the fact that there is one. We're not
(34:01):
present to the fight that is there right in front
of our face for us to take that perspective anytime
that we want to.
Speaker 3 (34:09):
And it's just, man, it's crazy.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
And I keep going back to thinking about what your
mom being at peace, right, And it kind of goes
back to thinking own asses are like she was her
treasure of her heart in the right place. Like the
things that she valued her entire life and sought after
allowed her to be at peace, whereas most people at
that point in life may be fighting for if I
(34:35):
could have one more moment, if I could have one
more chance to if I can have a little bit
more time with my dad or my brother. It's like,
are people just not focused on the right things? Are
people like? Are we eternally distracted in a way? What
do you think that that speaks to? Yeah, I think
(34:56):
you hear the nail on the head. I think we
are distracted. I mean more than ever. Right, we live
in a world.
Speaker 3 (35:01):
For other distractions, and I like to tell people like,
fulfillment is what matters. Right. You could have everything and
not be fulfilled, and we know it, and you're not
going to be at peace in your life. I've seen
highly successful people. I've been there at the point in
my life where I have all the success, right, I
check all the boxes, but I'm not doing what I
truly love, and there's a sense of like, man, I'm
(35:22):
not fulfilled in life. And I've had the opposite where yeah,
I'm not checking off all the boxes as far as
in the world's eyes, but I'm checking off all the
boxes that I care about in my life. Kind of
what you talked about earlier, what you're doing music and
the things that you care about the podcast. You're checking
off those boxes. So you're having that sense of fulfillment,
that sense of meaning, like I'm doing the things that
mean something to me with my mother. And it's funny
(35:44):
you mentioned that, man, because I'm currently writing my book
Protect Your Piece, and I talk about that in the
process of like even the athletes, I say, you see
the athlete that has peace in the big moment, like
maybe the last second shot, it'd be Jordan or whatever.
It may be or the big time catch, you know,
and fourth down, it's just like they have pieces because
they prepare for that, right, they position themselves for that
(36:04):
over and over and over. They suffered in those practices
for that. And so when I look at my mom's life, Yeah,
she died in peace because she lived in priority. Right,
she died in peace because she lived in priority. So
like the things that matter to her, she did those things.
She spent time with her kids, right, she instilled the
things in her kids that she wanted to instill. She
(36:25):
had the values, and like she lived a life by that.
And I took that and one of the things that
I tell people today and it kind of hits people
in the heart, and I say, you know, the thing
that I realized with my mother because when she died,
like I was in my phone, like I was listening
to like even like the Jay Electric Jee Electronicals on
with Jayzon. I don't know if you heard it, but
it's like literally to the tea of what I was
(36:46):
dealing with. Like I'm scrolling texts all day long, like
trying to find things my mom left me, and then
it hit me, It's like it's not by what she
left for you. It's about what she left in you
and her car went back to the dealership, right. Her
jewelry got dispersed through her family, her clos are still there,
like all the things, all the possessions, like they didn't
go with her, you know what I mean. So I realized, like, wow,
(37:09):
what did live on is everything she's putting us. And
so this quote I created from this. Your life is
not multiplied through your possessions. It's multiplied through your purpose.
So if we want to multiply our life, we want
to continue to live on, we want to continue to
create change even when we're no longer here. It's all
about purpose, because our possessions die when we die. Right.
(37:31):
So that's really taught me a lot about that process
of like what matters most, what's going to live on
even when I move on, you know, and transition and
so oh yeah, man, it's something that I'm trying to
live by day by day.
Speaker 5 (37:44):
It sounds like everything you do and how you show
up each day is ultimately to protect your piece.
Speaker 4 (37:51):
And I know that's the name of your next book.
Speaker 5 (37:53):
So maybe maybe we can bring this all full circle
and you can just share a little bit about the book,
Why those words protect your piece matters so much to you?
Speaker 4 (38:02):
And when that book's going to be coming out.
Speaker 3 (38:05):
Yeah, So the book comes out January twenty twenty four.
It's words that I've been living by man since two
thousand and probably ten twenty eleven. And protect your peace
means different things for everybody, right, But the thing I
like to explain is it's hard to experience peace in
(38:25):
your life. Right when you're trying to control things that
out of your control. Right, you'll never be at peace.
So peace is being able to let go of controlling
situations and just be good with just trusting the process,
being good with trusting God's playing for your life, and say,
you know what, everything is going to work out. Peace
doesn't mean the storm doesn't exist. Right, It's not naive
to say, oh, the storm doesn't exist. No, the storm exists.
(38:46):
But I have peace and knowing the storm show path
that's where my peace comes in. So I can learn
how to dance in the rain. I can have that
gardener's mindset and celebrate the rain because I understand that
the rain, just like in the real world with a gardener,
it's growing the garden and it's also growing things in
my life. It's growing my faith, it's growing my perseverance,
my endurance, it's growing my what me folks on what
really matters. And so it's non principles in the book
(39:10):
Throbbing in the Chaotic World, and you know, it's broken
down in three sections. So I break down protect your
peace in these three sections. The first is protect your energy, right.
I mean we do that by disconnecting often, we do
that by setting boundaries. We do that by doing our worth.
We give energy away so freely and as if we
have an infinite amount. That's why we live in a
world full the burnout. We live in a world full
(39:31):
of stress because we're not taking care of our energy.
The second part of the book is protect your mind. Right.
That is kind of what we talk about. What's your perspective,
what's your vision right, the things that you want to do.
Protecting that because the world, as we know, is going
to tell you that you shouldn't be doing this, you
shouldn't be doing that's impossible, So it's about really protecting that.
And then the last part is protect your soul. And
(39:52):
that's the deep work of you know, as I call
it soul fulfillment. That's the deep work of creating simple happiness.
And where I learned that from is looking at my kids,
I'm like, where did we get to? Where we made
happin is so hard to obtain, right, Like we got
to have all these things checked off to be happy.
And if you look at the people who are have
(40:14):
the most, and there's a thing what like you know
you happiness works off of what's happened, and I kind
of I agree with that to an extent. But the
kind of happens I'm talking about is that internal happiness
that more like joy that doesn't depend on what's happening
in your life. So you look at your kids and
I call it morning Marley. So that's my baby girl.
And I wrote this in the book because it was
(40:36):
a morning that she does this all the time. She
came in our room and said, it's morning. This morning,
she loved up. She was so happy it was morning,
and it clicked like, Man, I want that type of
joy where I just wake up and be happy that
it's just morning time. And I just studied her and
just watched it that whole day and she just happy
for the flowers and the things that as we grow
up as adults we overlook and we take for granted,
(40:56):
and so the whole book is just really bringing people
back home to their soul and in such a chaotic world.
I think Nipsey said it best right, and I don't
know if it's his cool, but I know that, you know,
I saw the video and he said, you know, would
you rather be at peace with the world and at
war with yourself or vice versa? Be at peace with
yourself and at war with the world. And that's what
(41:19):
protecting your piece is all about. In the nutshell, it's
being at peace with yourself no matter what's going on,
you and everything is going to be okay and workout. Man.
Thank you, Trent.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
You are a blueprint not to just respond to adversity
one time or come back one time, but to make
responding to adversity successfully a lifestyle. Man. So appreciate the
way that you just use your words and how impactful
you are just as yourself. And thank you for your time.
Speaker 3 (41:48):
Man.
Speaker 2 (41:49):
I know it's valuable and we appreciate you spending it
with Donnie and I but with everybody listening as well.
So thank you, bro. Everybody that's listening, keep coming back,
keep listening to us, because that's what we're gonna do.
That's who we are. And check us out anywhere you
get your podcasts and download, and check us out in
Inflection Point YouTube as well, and we'll see you guys
(42:12):
again soon.
Speaker 4 (42:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (42:14):
If you're not one of the millions of followers already
following Trent Shelton, check them out. I think it's at
Trent Shelton on all platforms, right.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Yes, sir at Tren Sheldon Man. I want to say
I appreciate y'all of what y'all do and keep doing it.
You guys, share this podcast, Share Comeback Stories, because this
is very rare to have two guys like this really
giving y'all nuggets and tools to really help your life.
So thank you and saluting you guys for what y'all do.
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Comeback Stories is a production of Inflection Network and iHeartRadio.
For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Come Back Stories is a production of Inflection Network and iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
What's going on, everyone, It's Darren Waller tying in from
the New York Giants, excited to welcome you guys back
to another episode to come Back Stories. I'm here with
my boy, my brother, my man Donnie.
Speaker 3 (00:20):
Donnie. How you doing today, Bro?
Speaker 4 (00:21):
I'm doing well. Welcome everyone.
Speaker 5 (00:24):
Yeah, it's great to be here, great to be carrying
the message of recovery, healing, transformation, and that's exactly what
we're going to do today on our episode with our
guest Trent Shelton, who is actually coming back for round two.
Speaker 4 (00:40):
Trent, how you doing, my man? Man?
Speaker 3 (00:41):
I'm doing good, you know. Thanks for having me, Donnie
and Darren. And it's always great to come back, you know,
to a podcast. So I'm grateful for you guys having me.
Speaker 4 (00:51):
Since the last episode.
Speaker 5 (00:53):
There's been a lot of adversity, a lot of pain,
a lot of change, a lot of loss in your life.
So I think I'll ask you the same question I
just asked you, but maybe with a little bit more
sincerity of how are you doing?
Speaker 3 (01:09):
I'm good in this current moment. It's been a tough
season for me over the last few years. But you know,
I've been able to battle a lot of things mentally, spiritually,
and it's laying my relationship closer to God even even more,
it's allowed me to sit down with this injury and
be able to connect and focus on the things that
really matter. So I would say, even in this storm,
(01:32):
it's definitely helped me find just goodness in my life
and focus on the things that truly matter.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
What do you feel like matters that maybe didn't matter before?
Speaker 3 (01:41):
Yeah, just man, just presence, Like you know, my family
obviously matter before, but just even you know, losing my
mother and then my grandmother, all these things that happened,
it just made me realize, like, you know, we don't
have forever. You know, fever comes with an expiration, dayton.
So it's made me sit down and be able to
enjoy the small things and things that really matter. The
(02:01):
memories that could be made, whether playing outside of my
key kids, are going to a trip, or just doing
the most random things that mean everything. Because when I
look back on my life, it's those moments that were
so simple. I call it simple happiness that I missed
so much. With those I can't create it no more
so that simple happiness bug has bit me, and I'm
like super excited about creating simple moments that mean everything.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
I feel like you have the perspective to be able
to enjoy the simple moments that come from an adverse
situation like this, because a lot of people may not
know that you've been facing pretty substantial adversity much of
your life. Could you take us through some of your
childhood and some of the adversity that you faced early
on for people that haven't heard your story.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Yeah, for sure, just childhood wise. You know, my child
was pretty good. I grew up in Louisiana, the youngest
of two older brothers. My biggest adversity was the thing
of like having two older brothers, and I always had
this success guilt where it's like, man, the attention is
all on me, but those guys helped me become who
(03:04):
I was, Like it was always me versus them playing
football and basketball, But it was always that thing of like, man,
I don't want all their attention. And I think honestly
that instilled a fear of success for me my whole
entire life, even now working through this, because it's like, man,
if I'm successful, like what am I going to lose?
Are people going to be jealous? Or all these things?
And so I had to work through that limited belief.
(03:25):
And my biggest adversity was sports man after college, you know,
going to NFL as a free agent and bouncing around
getting cut eight or nine times, being very unsure of
my situation, you know, day to day, you know, coming
off the practice field and getting released and like, oh,
what I'm going to do now? So that was tough,
and that process me just having a son, like how
am I going to provide for my son? Who am
I without the sport? So that was the hardest thing
(03:47):
of my life, trying to find an identity outside of
something that's been my identity my whole life.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
I'd like to.
Speaker 5 (03:52):
Ask real quick on the success guild thing, just from
a personal level. When you said those two words, that
really resonated with me on a lot of levels. Just
I had that same thing growing up, and how to
a brother a year and a half older than me
who achieved a ton of success, like more than most athletically,
let's say, but maybe compared to me, it wasn't as successful,
(04:17):
And so oftentimes I would find myself very uncomfortable receiving
that acknowledgment, and I've seen that show up in my
life later on, where when I am acknowledged, I often
want to diminish or dim my light, if you will.
So I'm curious for you, like, how have you seen
that show.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Up for you later?
Speaker 5 (04:39):
And what was some of the work you did to
release that old story?
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Yeah? Man, I think even right now, just being totally transparent,
I'm still working through that because all the compliments that
I get are you helped me do this, or you
help me do that, and all the accolades, which really
doesn't do anything for me, and I've always kind of
downplayed it and pushed it away. And I realized that
in my mind that really helped me this. I was like, man,
(05:05):
I'm not being grateful for the blessings God gave me,
you know what I mean? Like I should be able
to under those blessings and feel good about it because
the people in my life that are truly happy for me,
they're going to be happy for my success, happy for
my happiness. And I realized that the wrong people, yeah,
they might have a problem with it, and that those
aren't my people. And so I've learned to really acknowledge
(05:25):
it I've learned to accept it, and it's really helped
me because I felt like in me not accepting the
recognition or whatever it may be, it was almost like
my purpose and my gift became a burden in a sense,
and I was like, I never wanted that to be
a thing. So I acknowledge it, but always point it
back to God as the reason of who I am
(05:46):
and the purpose he asked for my life. And that's
really helped me. But to be totally transparent something I
struggle with to this day.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I want to stay on what you said about people
thanking you for what you've done for them. I want
to ask you, do you feel like it's easy to
slip into like being so caught up and helping other
people that sometimes when it's time to maybe help yourself
that it may be a little difficult Because I find myself.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
In that area.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Sometimes I'm like people of addiction, like I do so
much for them, I speak so much into the lives
of people with mental health awareness, and I'm, you know,
kind of like out here on the front lines of it.
But then sometimes it's like when it comes to my
own things, sometimes I feel like I kind of struggle
do you feel.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
That way at all? A thousand percent man? And this
was exposed to me. It was I don't know who
it was and said this. It might have been like
ay Mini or something like that, but he had said
in a tweet that like he has talked about God
so much to other people that he's forgetting to actually
talk to God for himself. And that resonated me, like
(06:46):
on a spiritual level, but also on the personal level.
It's like, Yeah, I'm doing all these things for everybody else,
I'm pouring in everybody else. I'm making sure everybody else
is straight, and I'm not giving that to myself, right
And so I'm kind of the season right now, and
it seems like a selfish season, but it's not as
more self aware. It's just like being my unapologetically, my
unapologetic season where I'm really focusing on me so I
(07:06):
can be the best me for the world, for the
people who follow me, for my family, and making sure
that I'm giving to myself what I'm trying to instill
in them. So it's a process, man, that I'm working through.
But I realized when I didn't do that, my cup
was super empty and I was running on fumes. So
I think it's important to sit back and relax, have
(07:28):
time to disconnect for yourself. And so for me that's
early in the morning, late at night. I call it
reflection therapy. To be able to give myself in my
life what I need.
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Wow, I think that's amazing.
Speaker 5 (07:39):
And this just reaffirms why Darren and I wanted to
start this podcast where they may see two or three
individuals up here talking that ultimately are preaching these things
and teaching these things. And I think you get like
sixty million listeners every week that are listening to you
(07:59):
do your thing. But I think it's important to remember
that we are as teachers or coaches, that we are
still tripping over the same things that we're teaching all
the time. Like we are in this work with you
every single day.
Speaker 3 (08:13):
Absolutely. I mean, once you stop being a student, then
you stop learning. You know, even if I'm teaching, I
tell people all the time and they say, like, how
did you know I'm going through this? And I was like,
nine out of ten either I've been through it or
I'm going through it right now. I'm just sharing my
experience with it. And so I never positioned myself as
an expert, like I'm an expert to this expert of that,
(08:35):
my expertise is just going through this progression of life,
and I'm sharing my journey with you. Yes, it's some
things I might know a little bit more about, but
I'm sharing and being an open book. And I think
that's what you know you talked about the sixty million.
I think that's what has allowed me to be successful
is I'm not at the mountaintop telling you how to
get up here, right even if I've been up there, cool,
(08:55):
but I'm like back down this struggle with you. And
so even over the last few years, me being open
and sharing my journey of like, this is what I'm
dealing with, this is what I'm going through, but also
this is how I'm getting through it in real time.
And I know that builds a connection with those that
follow you, those that watch you, because it's like we're
inspired by perfection, but we're impacted through truth, through purpose,
(09:18):
through progression. So I'm always trying to show people like, yeah,
this is what I'm going through right now, and this
is how I'm getting through it, no doubt.
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Man, There's three students that are on this conversation right now,
that's for sure. But I want to ask you two guys,
because I know you guys could be teachers on this
one subject. I know both of you guys had to
reach a point where it was a transformation of your
identity from leaving your sports and the pain that that caused.
(09:47):
I know there are a lot of people out there
that may have certain dreams or see themselves doing certain things,
and for some reason or another, they have to go
into a different direction, and that separation is tough, That
transition is tough. Can you speak to some of the
emotions that come and what it looked like practically to
kind of cut your way through everything that may have
(10:08):
been trying to hold you right where you were.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
That's the hardest journey that I faced, for sure, is
trying to understand who I am without that identity put
on my name right and it's just very, very hard.
And you know, as an athlete, I mean, I talk
to athletes all the time, and that's some of the
things that I help them work through. It's like, man,
there's more to your life, and we hear these things,
but sometimes we don't want it to be more to
(10:32):
our life. I know I didn't at that time. Simply put,
for me, it came with me facing my reality first, right,
my reality is that this is over my realities. I
don't even love it no more my realities. I'm just
in it because I don't know what else to do
with my life, and so there has to be another chapter.
And my biggest fear man was not having another chapter
(10:52):
to my life outside of this, and so I faced
that reality. I dealt with it. Always say you'll never
win your war by running from your battle. So that
was hard. And then after I faced my reality to
release some things in my life, you know, and whatever
that looked like at the time, maybe it was my circle,
maybe it was the identity, and I had to burn
those bridges where I knew I couldn't go back. I
(11:14):
had to move forward. The last part of the process
is the repair process. And you know, we have these
voids in our life, but we have to be able
to repair, and repair to me means putting the strength
back into a weakness. And that was a very hard process,
but I ended up finding my purpose. I said, okay, well,
what qualities can I take from this thing that I
(11:35):
spent so much of my life on and apply this
to my real life perseverance, endurance, how to deal with adversity,
hard work, all the things that we learn as athletes.
And I say, you know what, I want to put
this into my current work. And at first, you know,
it wasn't nothing happening, right, It wasn't like it was
an external like validation and this is it for your life.
But I always tell people this and simply put for me,
(11:58):
because I get this question a lot, like how did
you know like this transition was right for you? And
the best way I can put it is it was
the piece in the midst of uncertainty, in the midst
of chaos in my soul that I knew this was
what I was created to do, even though there was
no external like validation of it. Internally, I knew that
(12:19):
this was I was created to do. And once I
really locked into that and stripped away, and I'm still
stripping away, like I still miss sports. I still that's
why I tore my achilles now thinking I'm an athlete
still and trying to play my nephew outside in basketball
in that rupture. But I'm still working through that process.
But now I realize that, man, you know, there is
something more to my life because I listened to that
(12:39):
piece and not necessarily my circumstances at that time.
Speaker 5 (12:43):
Man, hearing your shift into this other identity, into this
other life, it just it gets me thinking about how
rare that is and how many people don't find a
way out. And for me, the transformation happened because of
an addiction and because my life was so painful, so
(13:03):
self destruct hurting so many other people that I had
to surrender. But that's not where like this new identity
and this new purpose came from for me. Like I've
heard your quotes say, your transparency leads to transformation, And
that was the moment. It was like progressing and gaining
(13:24):
these spiritual tools, becoming a yoga teacher, becoming a coach,
and then ultimately sharing my story, sharing the pain, sharing
the shit. That was the moment that I shared that
at this event, like everything changed for me. But I'm
so grateful that I was able to find a way
out because I work with and talk to so many
people that haven't found a way out or never found
(13:47):
a way out and ultimately ended their lives through addiction
or mental health or suicide because of it. So for
me to be sitting on here with you two and
just knowing Trent, you're.
Speaker 4 (13:58):
Doing all the same work. You didn't have the addiction.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
You found a way and kind of had that awareness
encouraged to step into it. But it's it's been the
greatest gift and now to be able to teach that
back to athletes, like I mean, Darren was one of
the first ones that actually completely stepped totally into this,
and you know, he was doing music and you know
now the podcast and his foundation and he has all
(14:23):
these other things. So football is just a platform to
reach people, you know, and I'm speaking.
Speaker 4 (14:29):
For him right now, but it's so much bigger than that.
Speaker 5 (14:33):
And all you got to do is just look at
what number he is this year for the New York
Football Giants and that says everything.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Yeah, that's major. And I want to just ask even
Darren on this like question because I'm just curious, like
what's your transition because I noticed that about you and
I love it how you know, you have so many
different faces that you're like, you know, yes, I'm a
football player, cool, but you know these are the things
that I care about. WHI while I have this platform,
I'm going to push these things, Like is it tough
(15:00):
doing that, you know, like, is it ever from the
fans like, oh, like you should be focused on this
or that, or you should be a football player because
I know the box put like, how how do you
handle that part of it? I'm just curious. Yeah, there
is that. That is a reality.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
So if we look at just like music, for example,
I've been doing music since I got suspended from the
league for over a year in twenty seventeen, I was
really locking it on music and I put an album
out when I was in Oakland in twenty nineteen, and
that was when like I really started taking off and
making a name for myself and my performance on the field.
(15:38):
And I was playing every game and doing well, and
people were like, oh, the music is the music is dope,
Like they're playing in the stadium, Like nobody was really
saying anything.
Speaker 3 (15:46):
You get a couple of.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
People that was like, all stick to football, like but
that that's that is what it is. But this past season,
I was putting out videos and stuff like that that
I had filmed in the summer before training camp even started,
and I think I put one out. I'd already scheduled
to put it out, like on a Friday and it
was after we had played like a Thursday.
Speaker 3 (16:07):
Game and didn't win the game and I.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Had been injured, and so people were like, what is this,
Like you don't care about the game, you don't care
about the craft, and and so that that kind of
became a theme. I think like people kind of like
picked up on that and like it just became like
a cool thing to do, and it's and it's tough,
you know. So it's like, you know, people look at
your performance and it's like, if you're performing to my
(16:33):
liking and entertaining me to the level that I would like,
I'm gonna let you live. I'm gonna let you do
what you do. But if you're not, nah, we need
to we need to stick to your day job. And
you know, people don't really know that I'm not doing
the music to be popular or to have this brand.
Like this is just me doing something that I love
to do, I would do for free, I would do
if I never posted it again. And it's just a
(16:55):
great balance from everything that football demands, you know. And
so I've received that. I've received that with a lot
of things. And you got to kind of learn to
focus in and be like a lot of these people
are came in because of the performance.
Speaker 3 (17:12):
Some people are here for me, but some people are
here for the performance.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
If the performance isn't always there, because I'm an imperfect
human being and it's not always going to be that way,
you got to risk being able to lose some of
that because that's not the deep, affectionate, unconditional love that
we long for. That's and we have to be able
to find ways to differentiate from that. But that's not
to say it wasn't like a little bit stung a
(17:37):
little bit, you know, because these are people that were
your fans and support you and and all that. But
it's all learning, it's all recognizing like, okay, like this
is what it is.
Speaker 3 (17:47):
But I can't let.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
It deter me from doing what I feel called to
do because I feel like I have a voice in
this music. I feel like I have a voice in
these activities that I do. I'm not just out here
putting out a whole bunch of nonsense, you know. I
feel like I have something to say and I want
to communicate it in the way that I want to
communicate it. But also at the same time, everything that
I do, like Donnie a quote you ought to say
that I love is how you do something is how
(18:09):
you do everything. And so I'm going to be excellent
in everything that I do and not short one area
to put more time and effort into another, and just
stand tall on my convictions and feel good about what
I see when I look in the mirror. And because
I spent way too much of my life worried about
what other people's opinions were of me.
Speaker 5 (18:27):
Well, there's a lot there bro a couple things Darren
touched on. Well, when I hear you so clearly articulate
how you stay focused, how you find your center, like
that shit doesn't happen overnight, and it doesn't it doesn't
come with a ton of work and discipline and focus
and whatever the practices are that you've had, and continue it,
(18:48):
continue to level up to find those practices right to
be able to eliminate the noise, and yeah, the dedication
that you've had to find that and a lot of
it is also getting to the core wound of this
like not enough, not black enough, different story, right, And
I wanted to actually segue that into trends story because
(19:12):
I think Trent, I've heard you say before that the
first time that you ever felt like you weren't enough
was when you got drafted, right.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
Yeah, absolutely, yeah, Well I wasn't. I wasn't drafting right,
So I was waiting two days. I was supposed to
fifth or sixth round, but it didn't happen. And that
was the first moment of my life where you know,
obviously I was telling everybody I was good, I was okay,
I'm not worried about it, but deep down inside I
was hurt. I was like, man, like, am I not
good enough? Like, you know, I put up the numbers,
(19:42):
like I ran when I was supposed to run, Like
what's up? And at that moment, I was like, man,
maybe I'm not cut out for this. And I went
through a little bit of what I now know like
a small form of depression until my phone rang, you know,
as a hot paraty free agent, and then that that
shift happened. Even going in there, you know, you're starting
off the bottom of the totem poles. So even then
(20:03):
I'm like, man, like, am I even supposed to be here?
It's like the first time in my life where I
questioned my skills, my ability, and just myself in general.
Speaker 4 (20:11):
How dark did that get?
Speaker 5 (20:12):
Like what was the bottom or the darkest place that
not enough story or that maybe just the transition if
you even fast forward to when you knew football wasn't
going to be a reality, Like where did you go?
Speaker 3 (20:26):
Yeah, so I went to the things that I probably
shouldn't have went to, you know. I went to the drugs, alcohol,
the club and all the things that numbed it, you
know what I mean. And I was saying that was
self care, right, that was my thing. I'm just taking
care of myself, right, that's the self care that I
thought was self care at the time, But really it
was me running from my reality at the time, and
(20:48):
my lowest point had to be well two thousand and nine,
and you know I've told this story before, but you know,
I was with the Seahawks that released me, and I
was back home in Dallas. They called me and say, hey,
like we want you to come, you know, up here.
So I rush home from Dallas to Fortworth. It's about
like a forty five minute drive through some stuff in
the suitcase. You know, I'm on Facebook at the time.
Tell everybody I'm going back, you know, I tell my parents,
(21:10):
everybody's happy. I get to the airport, and I can
laugh about it now. I wasn't laughing at but I
can get to the airport, and I get to the
airport and you know that two o six number calls
and I'm like it's weird, okay, hey this like have
you left yet? And I was like nah, and it
was like, well, we have the plans on things like
don't leave, like we'll bring you back later, and they
never brought me back. So at that moment, I was like, like,
(21:31):
I was so hurt, and I was like, man, you know,
I felt like that door had shut. I didn't love
the game anymore or anything like that, and I just
really felt like, man, you know what, I'm just gonna
live my life. I'm gonna just do the things that
I know make me feel good. And I ran to
those things, and obviously that just feeled avoid temporarily and
(21:51):
doed me in a deeper depression.
Speaker 5 (21:53):
What we suppress turns into depression. Right, that's another one
of your lines. I mean, there's a lot of stuff
as I'm revisiting our conversation and just how much First
I want to just reac anology for how much of
an inspiration you've been in my life and always showing
up and then watching you on stage live, Like, there's
a lot of motivational speakers out there, but Trent's like
(22:14):
on a whole other level in addition to the level
of authenticity just his stage presence and then what he's
talking about is I mean, you've always just spoken right
right straight to my heart. So thank you for that, man, and.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
I appreciate it. Man.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
I want to I want to enlighten the people about
what you talked about on our first conversation was the
dark work. I don't think people may know about that
or have an adequate definition of what that is. Could
you explain that to everybody else listening.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
Yeah, it's just the work that you're doing in the dark.
It's that work that doesn't get celebrated, you know, the athlete.
I'm telling this to my son. We worked out this
morning in the garage, and like, this is the work
that sucks, right, but you fall in love with this
work because this is the work that when you show
up on the field and you're doing the thing, people
call you lucky, but they don't know that you're putting
this dark work over time. And so whether it's sports
(23:06):
or whether it's mentally it's the prayers, is to getting
into your word's to reading the books and things that
aren't sexy that nobody sees. It's the working on your craft.
It's to being addicted to the mastery right in your
craft and really putting your best foot forward with music,
whatever it may be, and nobody sees that process. But
then those are the things that really help you shine
the light, right, those are the things that people celebrate
(23:27):
you for, and those are things that people recognize you for.
So the dark work isn't sexy. I always say, progression
is an ugly role that leads to a beautiful place.
So now I get this all the time, bro, Like
they're like, oh man, your overnight success. It's like what
I've been doing this since two thousand and nine, Like
go look at the dark work of the videos on
YouTube where I'm like, ah, that's terrible, but I was
still proud of myself for stepping into that moment. So
(23:50):
that dark work, man, is the things that aren't celebrated,
But it's the reason that people will celebrate you. You
know maybe in two or three years or a year
when that harvest actually comes from the seed that you
plan it.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
Yeah, because there's so many in this world today, I
feel like dark work bankrupts this idea of a pain free,
completely comfortable, obstacle free experience that we all want, you know,
like no matter you know, even today, Like with the
discipline and practice I have in place, sometimes I wish
(24:22):
results and certain things would come faster than they do.
It's just kind of in us as human beings. But
I love that term and that idea because if we
could get that into young people earlier on, like this pain,
this suffering isn't breaking you, it's not gonna keep you down.
It's actually gonna help you build. It's actually gonna help
(24:44):
lay a foundation for anything that you're going to try
to do, anything that you any challenge you may come across.
If we could just circulate that message, I feel like
that could go a long way, more than anything else
you may explain, just like, hey, when you get to
something hard, go through it, stick with it, embrace because
(25:05):
one day you're going to look back on it and
be grateful for it, as opposed to run from it
or numb from it. It's a big deal because it's
all across my story. I'm a drug addict and alcoholic
in recovery because my addiction form because I didn't want
to feel things like That's really the basis behind my
(25:26):
using was I just don't want to go through that.
I don't want to feel this, get rid of this
as soon as possible. I don't want to have to
sit with it and deal with it and work through it.
And that's why I feel like this. Just the messaging
behind that is so universal. And I had to get
you to speak on that for a couple of minutes.
Speaker 3 (25:44):
For sure, Man, I appreciate that. And you said that
word suffering, like I think suffering comes with a negative thing,
Like yes, there's I would say, choose your suffering.
Speaker 4 (25:53):
There is a.
Speaker 3 (25:53):
Negative suffering that I like to say use it comes
from regret because you look back and like, man, I
wish I would have. But there's a positive suffering, right,
Suffering builds, Perseverance builds and do lareance builds faith. You know,
we have to go through our suffering, you know, in
order to get to certain things in our life. And
so I've been trying to even with myself and my
(26:14):
kids and the athletes I'm around are just people in general,
Like you know, there's certain things that You've got to
go through to be able to get to the thing
that you want. So this is a part of it.
So enjoy it, you know, I mean celebrate it. And
you know, sometimes it's hard for people that accept that,
but you know, I think when they look back and realize, like, oh,
this is the sacrifice I got to make in order
to get this, and they realize, you know, like this
(26:36):
is a part of the process in order to be great, it.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
Makes me think of another trend Shelton quote.
Speaker 5 (26:42):
That's the only way to harbor true strength is to
conquer the pain at its deepest level.
Speaker 4 (26:48):
And I'd love to ask.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
You, I can't imagine any more pain than the loss
of a parent, Like what has that been?
Speaker 4 (26:56):
Like what is the dark work.
Speaker 5 (26:58):
And the grief and how is that grief that grieving
process continuing to unfold as you really lean into that pain.
Speaker 3 (27:08):
Yeah, that's definitely the hardest thing ever, you know, losing mom,
and especially for me, Mom was, you know, my biggest supporter.
I always give her credit my dad to my dad
is phenomenal, but Mom was the was the one bringing
me with her to conferences and like instilling this in me.
And I even know that you know at such a
(27:29):
young age, and so seeing her go through her suffering,
you know, and the thing that I tell people, like
what really changed it for me? You know when you
see man stuff, when you see your mom you know,
for six months, you know, in hospice, and she's still
keeping faith. Like she had brain cancer, she had breast cancer,
she had liver cancer, and she's still keeping her faith.
(27:52):
And it's like this is a different type of faith
that I've never seen. She's still thanking God even when
she's dying. And the day that she passed, you know,
I got to call at four him in the morning.
I already knew what it was. My dad called me
and I went over there and I had just seen
her two days before that and she had her hardest day,
like she was struggling to breathe everything, Like I thought
(28:13):
I was gonna lose her in that moment. And when
I went over there after she passed, just looked at
so much at peace. And the thing that I told
my mom on that Friday before she passed, I said, Mom,
you're healing. You know what I mean, It's okay, you're healing.
You don't have to fight like you're healing it's good.
And she left that Saturday night early Sunday morning. And
when you see somebody you know with a body bag
(28:35):
and put it in the you know, the hearse, it's
just reality. And so I made my mom this promise
to take care of everybody, and I put that burden
on myself and I wasn't even allowing myself to heal
because I was making sure everybody else was okay. And
it got to a point, man, where I was looking
in the mirror one day, and this is what really
turned I call it my grief into my greatness. And
(28:57):
there's days, bro even today, like when I'm about being
on stage, let me text my mom, or fourth of July,
like I'm like, dang, it's the reality is she's not here,
but she's still here more than ever. And I remember,
probably a year after she passed, Man, I was in
the bathroom and I remember looking in the mirror and
I was at a very very very low point, very
(29:21):
low point. Nobody would know because I was smiling for
the camera, you know, but I was really dying behind
the scenes, as I say, And I just had this
thought and I thought about my kids, and I said,
man passed away. I wouldn't want to be the reason
why my kids gave up. I wouldn't want to be
the reason why they lived in the depression. I wouldn't
(29:42):
want to be the reason why they stopped going hard
like I would want to be the reason why they
went harder. You know what I mean? Do it for daddy,
You know what I mean. Let's go. And I sat
there and I said, man, my mom was such like
she worried about everything, bro Like she would call me
like like I pray for you to take out the
treasure you okay, Like she worried about everything. So I said,
I know my mom is worrying right now if she
(30:03):
can hap you know, happen to be able to see
this right she's worrying. She's sad because her baby boy
and even her boys like they're giving up. And at
that moment, I said, man, I felt these words and
I don't know if it's true to certainly, I said
my mother, Mom, I know you can't rest in peace
UNCEI I'm living in peace. And that switched everything for me.
(30:25):
I said, now was the moment where yes, I'm gonna
go through my hard times with grief, but I'm gonna
make sure she stays alive forever. I'm gonna make sure
the legacy is carried on. I'm gonna make sure generations
have we have generational healing, generational health, you know what
I mean. I'm gonna make sure of that. Because she
ran this race of life and I refuse to allow
that race to be in vain. I need to do
(30:46):
my part. So I got the baton and at that
moment it changed everything for me, just like that, And
now the tears are happy instead of sad tears.
Speaker 4 (30:55):
Wow, thank you for sharing that.
Speaker 5 (30:59):
I mean, I'm thinking about as you walked us through
that and hearing how she used to worry about everything.
But really, at the end, what most people are so
worried about dying, there was this unshakable faith where she
was mirroring, mirroring and modeling that unwavering faith when she
was about to leave this earth. So to be able
(31:21):
to plant that seed for you, And yeah, the way
that you turn around things and maybe this is something
that you've talked about before. Maybe you can touch on this.
Those those three questions that you'll you'll ask maybe if
you're needing, if you're stuck, or you're needing a perspective
shift with how am I going to respond what does
this mean to you? Or what does this mean to me?
And then how am I going to use it? And
(31:44):
then maybe touch on that last piece where you say,
instead of saying what does this mean, it's what is
this going to mean?
Speaker 4 (31:53):
So maybe you can touch on that.
Speaker 5 (31:55):
You can articulate it a lot better than I can,
but I'd love to hear about it.
Speaker 4 (31:59):
Now.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
That's it, man. You know I talk a lot about
if anybody can be a title I wwould say I
really help people like shift their perspective right from their
prison to their power. I think perspective is everything in life.
Speaker 4 (32:11):
Right.
Speaker 3 (32:11):
We can look at a thing and we can see
the worst in it or we can see the best
in it. And I've been living by these words because
of that, and it's a simple phrase that helps me shift.
And the words are it could be worse, it will
get better. So always tell myself that when I'm going
through a hard time, it could be worse, which you could,
it will get better. And that helps me shift into
(32:32):
my power of my in my perspective and so perspective
I like to tell people it's like a set of lenses, right,
it's like you're set of lenses of how you see
the world. We can't control the experiences most times, we
can control the meaning we give to the experience. So
I always say, like, life is not about what happens
to you, It's about the meaning that you give it, right,
(32:53):
It's about how you use it. If you're down at halftime,
you're not going to be like all this means that
you know, we ain't coming back as an athlete, we
know now this means we're gonna have a comeback. That's
what this means. We're gonna mean the Patriots with Atlanta.
This means we have the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history,
you know. So that is kind of the mindset that
I've taken to everything in my life. When something happens,
(33:15):
that's that's different right there.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
Man, that I read a quote a couple of days ago.
I think it's Mark Twain. It said, the ancestor of
an action is a thought, And like you just put
such great wording to it, because somebody can't write a
new story, write a comeback story without first a perspective
(33:41):
of this is worth writing, or I have the power
to write it. Experience and healing and wisdom is going
to come for me to write this story. And it's
a choice in every single moment, But a lot of
us we feel like there isn't one, or we aren't
present to the fact that there is one. We're not
(34:01):
present to the fight that is there right in front
of our face for us to take that perspective anytime
that we want to.
Speaker 3 (34:09):
And it's just, man, it's crazy.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
And I keep going back to thinking about what your
mom being at peace, right, And it kind of goes
back to thinking own asses are like she was her
treasure of her heart in the right place. Like the
things that she valued her entire life and sought after
allowed her to be at peace, whereas most people at
that point in life may be fighting for if I
(34:35):
could have one more moment, if I could have one
more chance to if I can have a little bit
more time with my dad or my brother. It's like,
are people just not focused on the right things? Are
people like? Are we eternally distracted in a way? What
do you think that that speaks to? Yeah, I think
(34:56):
you hear the nail on the head. I think we
are distracted. I mean more than ever. Right, we live
in a world.
Speaker 3 (35:01):
For other distractions, and I like to tell people like,
fulfillment is what matters. Right. You could have everything and
not be fulfilled, and we know it, and you're not
going to be at peace in your life. I've seen
highly successful people. I've been there at the point in
my life where I have all the success, right, I
check all the boxes, but I'm not doing what I
truly love, and there's a sense of like, man, I'm
(35:22):
not fulfilled in life. And I've had the opposite where yeah,
I'm not checking off all the boxes as far as
in the world's eyes, but I'm checking off all the
boxes that I care about in my life. Kind of
what you talked about earlier, what you're doing music and
the things that you care about the podcast. You're checking
off those boxes. So you're having that sense of fulfillment,
that sense of meaning, like I'm doing the things that
mean something to me with my mother. And it's funny
(35:44):
you mentioned that, man, because I'm currently writing my book
Protect Your Piece, and I talk about that in the
process of like even the athletes, I say, you see
the athlete that has peace in the big moment, like
maybe the last second shot, it'd be Jordan or whatever.
It may be or the big time catch, you know,
and fourth down, it's just like they have pieces because
they prepare for that, right, they position themselves for that
(36:04):
over and over and over. They suffered in those practices
for that. And so when I look at my mom's life, Yeah,
she died in peace because she lived in priority. Right,
she died in peace because she lived in priority. So
like the things that matter to her, she did those things.
She spent time with her kids, right, she instilled the
things in her kids that she wanted to instill. She
(36:25):
had the values, and like she lived a life by that.
And I took that and one of the things that
I tell people today and it kind of hits people
in the heart, and I say, you know, the thing
that I realized with my mother because when she died,
like I was in my phone, like I was listening
to like even like the Jay Electric Jee Electronicals on
with Jayzon. I don't know if you heard it, but
it's like literally to the tea of what I was
(36:46):
dealing with. Like I'm scrolling texts all day long, like
trying to find things my mom left me, and then
it hit me, It's like it's not by what she
left for you. It's about what she left in you
and her car went back to the dealership, right. Her
jewelry got dispersed through her family, her clos are still there,
like all the things, all the possessions, like they didn't
go with her, you know what I mean. So I realized, like, wow,
(37:09):
what did live on is everything she's putting us. And
so this quote I created from this. Your life is
not multiplied through your possessions. It's multiplied through your purpose.
So if we want to multiply our life, we want
to continue to live on, we want to continue to
create change even when we're no longer here. It's all
about purpose, because our possessions die when we die. Right.
(37:31):
So that's really taught me a lot about that process
of like what matters most, what's going to live on
even when I move on, you know, and transition and
so oh yeah, man, it's something that I'm trying to
live by day by day.
Speaker 5 (37:44):
It sounds like everything you do and how you show
up each day is ultimately to protect your piece.
Speaker 4 (37:51):
And I know that's the name of your next book.
Speaker 5 (37:53):
So maybe maybe we can bring this all full circle
and you can just share a little bit about the book,
Why those words protect your piece matters so much to you?
Speaker 4 (38:02):
And when that book's going to be coming out.
Speaker 3 (38:05):
Yeah, So the book comes out January twenty twenty four.
It's words that I've been living by man since two
thousand and probably ten twenty eleven. And protect your peace
means different things for everybody, right, But the thing I
like to explain is it's hard to experience peace in
(38:25):
your life. Right when you're trying to control things that
out of your control. Right, you'll never be at peace.
So peace is being able to let go of controlling
situations and just be good with just trusting the process,
being good with trusting God's playing for your life, and say,
you know what, everything is going to work out. Peace
doesn't mean the storm doesn't exist. Right, It's not naive
to say, oh, the storm doesn't exist. No, the storm exists.
(38:46):
But I have peace and knowing the storm show path
that's where my peace comes in. So I can learn
how to dance in the rain. I can have that
gardener's mindset and celebrate the rain because I understand that
the rain, just like in the real world with a gardener,
it's growing the garden and it's also growing things in
my life. It's growing my faith, it's growing my perseverance,
my endurance, it's growing my what me folks on what
really matters. And so it's non principles in the book
(39:10):
Throbbing in the Chaotic World, and you know, it's broken
down in three sections. So I break down protect your
peace in these three sections. The first is protect your energy, right.
I mean we do that by disconnecting often, we do
that by setting boundaries. We do that by doing our worth.
We give energy away so freely and as if we
have an infinite amount. That's why we live in a
world full the burnout. We live in a world full
(39:31):
of stress because we're not taking care of our energy.
The second part of the book is protect your mind. Right.
That is kind of what we talk about. What's your perspective,
what's your vision right, the things that you want to do.
Protecting that because the world, as we know, is going
to tell you that you shouldn't be doing this, you
shouldn't be doing that's impossible, So it's about really protecting that.
And then the last part is protect your soul. And
(39:52):
that's the deep work of you know, as I call
it soul fulfillment. That's the deep work of creating simple happiness.
And where I learned that from is looking at my kids,
I'm like, where did we get to? Where we made
happin is so hard to obtain, right, Like we got
to have all these things checked off to be happy.
And if you look at the people who are have
(40:14):
the most, and there's a thing what like you know
you happiness works off of what's happened, and I kind
of I agree with that to an extent. But the
kind of happens I'm talking about is that internal happiness
that more like joy that doesn't depend on what's happening
in your life. So you look at your kids and
I call it morning Marley. So that's my baby girl.
And I wrote this in the book because it was
(40:36):
a morning that she does this all the time. She
came in our room and said, it's morning. This morning,
she loved up. She was so happy it was morning,
and it clicked like, Man, I want that type of
joy where I just wake up and be happy that
it's just morning time. And I just studied her and
just watched it that whole day and she just happy
for the flowers and the things that as we grow
up as adults we overlook and we take for granted,
(40:56):
and so the whole book is just really bringing people
back home to their soul and in such a chaotic world.
I think Nipsey said it best right, and I don't
know if it's his cool, but I know that, you know,
I saw the video and he said, you know, would
you rather be at peace with the world and at
war with yourself or vice versa? Be at peace with
yourself and at war with the world. And that's what
(41:19):
protecting your piece is all about. In the nutshell, it's
being at peace with yourself no matter what's going on,
you and everything is going to be okay and workout. Man.
Thank you, Trent.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
You are a blueprint not to just respond to adversity
one time or come back one time, but to make
responding to adversity successfully a lifestyle. Man. So appreciate the
way that you just use your words and how impactful
you are just as yourself. And thank you for your time.
Speaker 3 (41:48):
Man.
Speaker 2 (41:49):
I know it's valuable and we appreciate you spending it
with Donnie and I but with everybody listening as well.
So thank you, bro. Everybody that's listening, keep coming back,
keep listening to us, because that's what we're gonna do.
That's who we are. And check us out anywhere you
get your podcasts and download, and check us out in
Inflection Point YouTube as well, and we'll see you guys
(42:12):
again soon.
Speaker 4 (42:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (42:14):
If you're not one of the millions of followers already
following Trent Shelton, check them out. I think it's at
Trent Shelton on all platforms, right.
Speaker 3 (42:22):
Yes, sir at Tren Sheldon Man. I want to say
I appreciate y'all of what y'all do and keep doing it.
You guys, share this podcast, Share Comeback Stories, because this
is very rare to have two guys like this really
giving y'all nuggets and tools to really help your life.
So thank you and saluting you guys for what y'all do.
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Comeback Stories is a production of Inflection Network and iHeartRadio.
For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast,
or wherever you get your podcasts.
Hosts And Creators
Eric Balchunas
Donny Starkins
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