July 17, 2025 • 52 mins
SEASON 3 EPISODE 145: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN
A-Block (1:45): Trump self-destructs over the Epstein files: now calls his supporters “weaklings” calls Republicans “stupid” for believing the Epstein story HE sold them, now demands reporters don’t cover it, and demands MAGA stops talking about it.
And now - most meaningfully - HE is connecting his Epstein Cover-up to his Russia Collusion Cover-up and continually tying Epstein to "The Steele Dossier." And what was the most grotesque part of the Steele Dossier story? Sexual perversion. Video. Blackmail.
Trump is himself tying himself and Epstein to the purported pee tape!
And that nauseating link and amazing implications (which he alone is making) are on top of the established reality: Donald Trump is president of the Jeffrey Epstein cover-up.Trump is RUNNING the Jeffrey Epstein cover-up. It’s TRUMP’S Jeffrey Epstein cover-up!
President Pervert. President Epstein. President Pee Tape. President Pedophile. President cover-up. "TRUMP’S EPSTEIN COVER-UP" - I want to hear that every day, from a leading Democrat. Every day and SIX TIMES on Sunday. Forever. I’m delighted Trump is destroying himself; I want Democrats to finish the job. I want it to destroy MAGA. I want it to bury them all, under a mountain of their own amoral, uncaring, "bullshit" – the word Trump just used in an enraged screed against his own MAGA "weaklings" whose support he now claims he no longer wants.
Is pursuing this Shapiro-Steele story disgusting? Yes. Is it sleazy? Yes. Is it what the Trumpist scum would do? Yes. Is it a terrible way to prevent dictatorship and terror? What? There are RULES here? No, there are no rules. Pick up the damn tire iron. This is democracy-saving gold. Every. Damn. Day.
Trump's the one who did this. He's the one who has now linked whatever he's choosing to do in covering up the Epstein story, to whatever there was in the Steele Dossier that would destroy him. He's the one who... crossed the streams.
B-Block (32:00) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Homeland Security Spokesman Micah Bock with a cleverly phrased bit of dishonesty which actually says Texans calling FEMA during the floods had the same chance of getting through as people buying tickets have of winning the lottery. Mehmet Oz, whose senate bid crashed over crudités, now sees his Medicare disembowlin rationalization not cut it over carrot cake, and what trophies did soccer mogul Gianna Infantino let Trump walk away with this time?
C-Block (42:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Twenty years, almost to the day, since I quit smoking and began my MSNBC campaign to get others to quit, too. Which the PRESIDENT of MSNBC naturally responded to...by trying to kill me.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. Donald
Trump is self destructing over the Jeffrey Epstein cover up.
(00:29):
It is up to Democratic leaders and to us to
help him finish this job. Because even before he attacked
MAGA yesterday as weaklings and Republicans as stupid and said
anybody who believes the Epstein story he sold them is
a quote past supporter, and I don't want their support anymore.
(00:51):
Even before he himself tied the Epstein sex scandal to
his Russian conspiracy and that sex scandal, even before he
turned one scandal into three different scandals, Donald Trump had
already become the president of the Jeffrey Epstein cover up.
Trump is running the Jeffrey Epstein cover up. It is
(01:13):
Trump's Jeffrey Epstein cover up, President pervert, President Epstein, president pedophile,
Trump's Epstein cover up. I want to hear this every day.
I want to hear this every day from a leading Democrat,
every day, and six times on Sunday forever. I wanted
(01:39):
to destroy him, one day at a time. I wanted
to destroy MAGA. I wanted to bury them all under
a mountain of their own amoral, uncaring bullshit the term
Trump used yesterday, bullshit. I want them buried under their
own bullshit forever. Is it disgusting yes? Is it sleezy yes?
(02:09):
Is it what the trumpest scum would do? Yes? Is
it a terrible way to prevent dictatorship and terror? What
there are rules here?
Speaker 2 (02:23):
No?
Speaker 1 (02:23):
There are no rules. Pick up the damn tire iron.
This is campaign gold every damn day. Because Trump cannot
steer out of this skid. First of all, he is developing,
if it is not already fully baked, a sense of
(02:44):
complete invulnerability and a simultaneous sense that he can demand
of his base total loyalty, to the point of ordering
them to protect pedophiles. He can't even admit he has
to steer out of it, never mind take the steps
he would need to steer out of it. He can't
even react to the rather shocking and entirely unreported revelation
(03:06):
that there isn't a minute missing from the Epstein suicide
video edited out by Trump's own people. There is two
minutes and fifty three seconds missing. More on what that
could mean going forward in a moment, but for now,
Trump not only avoids acting on it, or just avoids
(03:26):
it he keeps digging every damn hour President pervert, President Epstein,
President pedophile, Trump's Epstein cover up. It is so bad
already less than a week in that even the White
House Stenography Corps has begun to sit up and take
(03:47):
notice the meltdown. The latest meltdown was yesterday this morning.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
And you mentioned past supporters when you're talking about the
the Epstein issue.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Does that mean that you will affect it the disowning
any supporters?
Speaker 4 (04:06):
You want to know, there's a lot of faith in
certain people.
Speaker 5 (04:08):
Yeah, instead of talking about the things we've achieved, We've
had tremendous achievement, they're wasting their time with a guy
who obviously had some very serious problems who died three
or four years ago.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
Instead they want to talk about the Epstein hooks. And
the sad part is it's people that are really doing
the Democrats work.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
They're stupid. People said this was all a hoax.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
Has your attorney general told you this was a hoax?
Speaker 2 (04:42):
What evidence have you at the Attorney General? No, I
know it's a hoax.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
It's started by Democrats. It's been run by the Democrats
for four years. You had Christopher Ray and these characters
and call me before him, and it's a bad group.
It started to actually look at the Steele dossier that
turned out to be a total hoax.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
They were made up by but the Biden, you know,
and we went through years of that with the Russia
Russia Russia hugs. Why does he keep connecting his Epstein
cover up and Jeffrey Epstein to the Steel dossier. Where
would Epstein and the Steel dossier overlap be tape? Yesterday's
(05:32):
latest self incrimination came only after his remarkable post on
truth social again got ratioed to death by his own people.
Referred to my past supporters have bought into this bullshit
hook line and sinker. They haven't learned their lesson and
probably never will, even after being conned by the lunatic
left for eight long years. Blah blah blah blah blah.
(05:54):
All these people want to talk about, with strong prodding
by the fake news and the success starved Dems, is
the Jeffrey Epstein hoax. Let these weaklings continue for forward
and do the Democrats work. He's talking about his own voters.
He is yelling at his own audience. It is professional suicide.
(06:16):
Let these weaklings continue forward and do the Democrats work.
Don't even think about the talking of our incredible and
unprecedented success because I don't want their support anymore. This
can be arranged. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Make America great again. Well, he's really serious. He used
(06:37):
both of his catchphrases madness. It is utter madness, and
they see it for the first time in most cases,
and they don't all have to see it. Just enough,
MAGA are calling him the Antichrist. Just enough, MAGA are
asking if he's now going to pardon Gallaine Maxwell, Just enough,
(07:02):
MAGA saying he's now part of the conspiracy. The worst
of the polling has not broken against him yet. Nobody
has asked the question, do you now believe less in
Trump today than you did a week ago? It hasn't
happened yet, but a you gov this week, seventy five
percent want quote all Jeffrey Epstein case documents released. Seventy
(07:27):
five percent of Republicans one of the morons to whom
they handed those three ring binders marked the Epstein files.
In February, rogan o'handley d C. Draino called for all
(07:48):
documents to be released. Called for that twenty minutes before
Trump attacked MAGA also quote, obviously this is not a
complete hoax. I don't want it to consume his presidency,
said Laura Lumer. Great work, MAGA, keep it up, and
(08:09):
they have to. That's what makes this so inescapable for Trump.
These slime have, in the years since Trump descended, have
created their own careers off things like the Epstein dragon
and their portrayal of Trump as the knight who would
slay it. It's not about his presidency or the cover
(08:31):
up or even the victims. It's about their money. And
if it comes down to their money or Trump's presidency,
guess which one goes up in flames. Do I smell hamburning? No,
that's just Trump. Trump has taught them and taught them well,
(08:51):
always protect your money. Keep getting him angry, Keep distracting
him Democrats, keep making him insist. The Democrats made up
the Epstein files in twenty nineteen when Trump was present. No,
not in twenty nineteen, twenty twenty five, when Trump was
also president. Keep getting him to insist. Epstein died three
(09:12):
or four years ago. That would be when Biden was president,
instead of in twenty nineteen, when Epstein actually died. And
Trump was president. Keep getting him to demand that his
cult violate the physical laws of time and space and counting.
Keep getting him to yell at his own audience every
(09:35):
damn day, and six times on Sunday. Pick up the
damn tire iron for the first time since perhaps the
Access Hollywood tape. The Republicans who embraced the MAGA conspiracy
time bomb had its sown under their chests. They do
not know what to do next, so they keep doing
(09:57):
everything all at once. Congressman Tim Burchett says he doesn't
trust the DOJ wants more data, hours after he voted
against the Democratic bill to force the release of whatever
the DOJ has. Mike Lawler told a CNN anchor it
was nonsense that CNN was covering Epstein. The anchor, John
Berman had the balls to destroy Lawler with quote, the
(10:19):
deputy director of the FBI took workof Friday to protest
the DOJ's handling of this. That's why we're covering it.
Nancy Mace called for the death penalty for child rapists,
thinking that nobody would have noticed that. Hours before she
voted to protect Trump and his cover up of Jeffrey
Epstein and child rapists. Charlie Kirk attacked Trump Saturday, one
(10:45):
eightied Monday, told his sheep to trust the government. One
eightied again Tuesday, demanding Trump release more information and fix
the Epstein mess. Mike Johnson, the Speaker of the House,
who comes from a town full of closets, went from
prostituting himself for Trump to insisting Pam Bondie come forward
and explain herself and release everything, and maybe have Glaine
(11:08):
Maxwell testify to the House of Representatives.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
The question here about it that concerns either testifying or
testimony for Julane Maxwell potentially before Congress.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
Or if you would support.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
Members like Margin, Taylo Green or Anapoline A Luna on
the release of subpoena subpoenaing the Epsteine documents from the
DJ whether you would support either of those.
Speaker 6 (11:32):
Yeah, I haven't talked to Marjorie or Anna about that
specific subject, but I'm for transparency. We're intellectually consistent in this.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
We look.
Speaker 6 (11:39):
Reagan used to tell us we should trust the American people.
I believe in that principle. I know President Trump does
as well, and I trust him. I mean, he put
together a team of his choosing, and they're doing a
great job. It's a very delicate subject, but we should
put everything out there and let the people decide it.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Mike Johnson with Benny Johnson, and that's a couple of
ugly small Johnson's right there. That was Tuesday, yesterday. Mike
Johnson said what he said to Benny Johnson was misrepresented. Well,
if it was, he's the one who misrepresented it. But
in underscores, the Republicans are completely panicked over this. They
(12:16):
have no clue what to do next. This isn't in
their playbook. The moment when the streams cross and the
conspiracies collide with each other and with reality, and one
set of your lies contradicts the other set of your lies,
and you have to choose, and your choice is exactly
what you told your cult would never happen. It's perfect
(12:37):
Trump's Epstein cover up. Every damn day now, the Democratic
hierarchy fear apart from the now standard. We're afraid to
do anything, certainly anything that might dirty our loafers. Let's
(12:58):
listen to Schumer and just let them self destruct like
they did over tariffs. All right, they didn't self destruct
over tariffs, just like they did over the access Hollywood tape.
Oh right, they didn't. We stood aside and they got
away with it. Apart from the standard but old timey
politics will resume if if only we just believe hard enough,
you know, like Peter Pan. This Democratic party fear appears
(13:22):
to be that if Democrats push too hard, Panbondi or
especially Dan Bongino and Cash Patel could easily fabricate and
release a new set of documents that implicates only Democrats.
This is actually logical. It certainly would only be about
a three on the one to ten scale of fascist
lying and evil. On the other hand, Actor Bondi promised
(13:46):
to produce the documents and a client list after they
handed out those neat three ring binders in February. Why
didn't the Republicans do this then? What could have better
served their coup plans? What could have better enshrined their
dictatorship than to seize the Epstein case permanently and perjure
(14:09):
their way to who knows what frenzy among the idiot
magabase by releasing documents that only show Democratic perpetrators give
them exactly what they wanted. Hollywood stars democratic politicians. Case
closed that there wouldn't be any prosecutions or anything else.
(14:31):
Wouldn't matter. Somebody would say, Oh, they're all publicly executed.
You just didn't see it on the news. Why didn't
they just make up the worst shit their perverted lack
of souls could have read from their diaries? I mean
made up. I can't really answer that. But they didn't,
(14:52):
did they, And now it's too late. They chose instead
an alternate path lighting the room. They had all locked
themselves in a blaze. There is no way out. They
chose to stonewall, to cover up, to bullshit, to somehow
manage to insult the intelligence of their cult, even though
(15:13):
their cult doesn't have any intelligence. I guess they could
still make up a new Epstein report blaming, blaming, Zor
and Mamdani. But their problem is now none of the
conspiracy theorists, at least a third of the American voting population,
(15:33):
none of them will believe whatever they are now told
by Trump. They are shaken for the first time in
the last decade. This resonates in a way nothing else
possibly could. All that will stick with them is a
four word sentence, Trump's Epstein cover up. But wait, there's more.
(16:01):
There is one move that could make it even worse
for Trump and even better for Democrats, who recognized that
after ten years of buying candy bars, they have found
the golden ticket, if only they'll stop Schumer from eating it.
Axios reports that one of the responses, the more realistic
of the MAGA infected our pitching as a possible way
to minimalize the damage to get some survivors back to
(16:23):
shore is a Jeffrey Epstein special counsel. Oh my god,
a special counsel targeting Pam Bondy in cash, Fortel and
the Trump deep state. Yes, oh my god, ken star
back from the dead, back from hell, but pointed directly
(16:45):
at Trump's heart. Let's go. Please Lord, Please Lord, Please Lord.
Let them appoint a special counsel. Please Lord, give the
Democrats how much time to keep this going? Every day
for weeks, for months, literally for the next quarter, in
seventy five days, because fortan seventy five days from now
is the midterms. But the wild card here Democrats have
(17:10):
to be willing to do this. I don't need Jeffrey
saying we'll get back to you. I need the Gavin
Newsom approach. I want Gavin Newsom to tweet Trump's Epstein
cover up day eight, day fifty day, seven hundred and twelve.
(17:32):
He seems to have the idea, the light bulb went
off over his head. Let's do this, gave do it,
Not wait for the Republicans to do it themselves. Not
let the media do it like that. Whatever happen, get
out there and attach this to everything that happens. Every
time a Republican speaks, just add well, he's doing that
(17:56):
to cover up for Trump's Epstein cover up. For instance,
Mike Johnson says this.
Speaker 6 (18:03):
God, I'm miraculos spared the president's life. I think it's undeniable.
And he did it for an obvious purpose. And his
presidency and his life are the fruits of divine providence.
And he points that out obviously now all the time,
and he's right to do so.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Mac Johnson says that, yes, God saved Trump. Some Democrats says, yes,
God saved Trump so Trump could lead the Trump Epstein
cover up every damn day and six times on Sunday. Now,
(19:01):
as to what's next on this that Wired story that,
if played correctly not only reignites the thing again if
it ever ever taps down a little bit, but sends
it off to burn down yet another room full of Republicans.
Wired Rights newly uncovered metadata reveals that nearly three minutes
of footage were cut from what the US Department of
(19:22):
Justice and Federal Bureau of Investigation described as full, raw
surveillance video from the only functioning camera near Jeffrey Epstein's
prison cell the night before he was found dead. The
video was released last week as part of the Trump
administration's commitment to fully investigate Epstein's twenty nineteen death, but
it's that has raised new questions about how the footage
(19:42):
was edited and assembled. Now, further analysis shows that one
of the source clips was approximately two minutes and fifty
three seconds longer than the segment included in the final video.
Footage appears to have been trimmed. Oh my god, it's
the equivalent of the Watergate eighteen minute gap. It doesn't
(20:07):
matter what was cut from the original video. It only
matters that something was cut from the original video. It's
like the eighteen minute gap. We think we know what
he was talking about, but it didn't matter in nineteen
seventy four, and it doesn't matter now. It doesn't matter
the stuff cut from the Epstein video could be an
ad for Trump's stakes. It doesn't matter. It's the cover
(20:30):
up that gets you, not the crime. It's what did
the president know and when did he know it? About
how Pam Bondi doctored the video. It's a special prosecutor,
and it's Christmas every day, and it's Gallaine Maxwell textifying
to the House of Representatives, and every Democrat on the
committee would get to ask a different version of this
(20:51):
same question. To your knowledge, miss Maxwell, when did Donald
Trump stop raping children? And then that brings me to
the point I have been hinting at all this time.
There is something else that is either really really stupid,
or really really ominous and grotesque and horrible, or all
(21:14):
of the above. The ex Republican Congressman Justin Amosh wrote yesterday,
there's something so incredibly damaging in those files that Trump
would rather nuke his base in a desperate effort to
get everyone to move on than publicly release the information. Unquote, huh,
(21:37):
something incredibly damaging in a tape about a pedophile sex
trafficking scum? What could it possibly be? I think Trump
has always done this. He always gives us the answer.
(21:59):
He just leaves enough information out there to make a
slight jump. This This is how Trump began his social
media attack on his own cult yesterday. This was the
second sentence quote, the radical left Democrats have hit pay
dirt again, Just like with the fake and fully discredited
Steele dossier. You heard the tape before. He keeps bringing
(22:25):
up the Steel dossier in connection to Epstein. These things
have nothing to do with each other. Or what could
be in the Steele dossier that has anything to do
with Jeffrey Epstein? Quote the Russia Russia, Russia scam itself
a totally fake and made up story. Wait, what's in
the Russia story that it would have anything to do
(22:47):
with Jeffrey Epstein? Where is the Epstein cover up overlap
with the Steele dossier and its lurid speculations and the
Russian conspiracy and its lurid reality. You know exactly where
the overlap is. The not very long leap across the
(23:11):
stream began to emerge the day before yesterday. Why is
he attaching the Steel dossier to Epstein? Sex? In fact,
it's probably more than sex. I think you're in for
(23:35):
a big surprise, Oh, Nancy, right, con.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
Top lap turn Drunkna Din din don.
Speaker 7 (24:07):
Bastu sick got a man fell down from bump, don't kanante.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Falst couple of notes. Still terrified of Trump and still
growing more so. The White House press corps happily fixated
on fiscal policy and whether or not Trump will fire
Jerome Powell. Because the White House press corpse still foolishly
(24:49):
thinks Trump is not the first post reality president, and because,
oh thank god, Jerome Powell has nothing to do with sex.
Each media outlet reported something different about Jerome Powell. Yesterday,
Trump had pulled far right House Republicans had gotten their
permission to fire Powell, scooped Politico. No, it's past that.
(25:09):
It's likely he's going to fire Powell, scooped Bloomberg. No,
he's about to fire Powell, scoop The New York Times.
Then Trump announced, We're not planning on doing anything. And
just to show how far he has separated himself from reality,
he gave us the real story again. He announced quote,
I was surprised he was appointed. Jerome Powell was appointed
(25:30):
by Trump. This is what Politico and Bloomberg and the
Times should be leading with. Trump either does not remember
that he appointed Powell or is trying to lie his
way through that reality in the same vein James Comer's
flailing Biden auto pen investigation. By the way, it'll be
(25:52):
a year Monday since Joe Biden bowed out Comer's investigation documents.
He's been signing them with an auto pen. Then there
is the fascist congressman from Tennessee, Andy Ogles. His second
quarter fundraising numbers are in money raised fifty three thousand,
(26:13):
one hundred and eighty seven dollars, expenses fifty four thousand,
two hundred and twenty five dollars. Andy Ogles is underwater
in campaign money. This may be because most of the
people whose voices Andy Ogles listens to and hears so
clearly in his head don't actually exist. And continuing the
(26:35):
cynical jokes about the campaign by Andrew Cuomo to beat
Zoran Mamdani in the pro forma election for Mayor of
New York in November, after already losing to him in
the actual election the primary a month ago. Here and
the joke is the guy funding Cuomo's campaign is Mamdani.
Because nothing could make mom Danny look better than more
(26:56):
and more Andrew Cuomo. Andrew Cuomo has made a ludicrous
campaign video and posted it on Twitter and other social
media and labeled it in it to win it even
though he already lost it. He got ratioed, not surprising.
The actual material numbers, though, are He got five and
(27:16):
a half thousand likes. Mam Donnie hung a fundraising link
from the video and that got one hundred and eighty
one thousand likes. So the Cuomo video got five thousand
likes for Cuomo and one hundred and eighty one thousand
likes from Hamdani, which prompted this all time classic joke
(27:40):
from somebody supposedly in Sweden named pi Jakobsen quote, If
Andrew Cuomo hates socialism so much, why did he choose
to be publicly owned? Oh that's the best of all time.
(28:02):
Also of interest, here, what's that shiny gold soccer object
in the Oval office? Is it the FIFA Club World
Cup trophy that Trump swiped or is it the bald
head of FIFA president Johnny Infantino. That's next. This is Countdown.
There's his countdown with Keith Oldwoman still ahead on this
(28:46):
new edition of Countdown. I am just about at the
twentieth anniversary of the day I stopped smoking, kind of
all of a sudden. Didn't all get done in one day,
but there was a day where I bought out the
Nicorette supply at two New York City drug stores, and
(29:06):
then I went on the air at MSNBC on a
crusade to try to get across to people one simple
idea that had never previously occurred to me till that day,
that it would be easier to quit smoking if you
didn't have cancer, then if you did have cancer, to
which the president of MSNBC quite naturally responded by trying
(29:27):
to kill me. It was an interesting pro cancer stance
on his part, and cutting to the chase, don't wait
for it to kill you. I'll kill you things I
promised not to tell next first. Believe it or not,
there's still more new idiots to talk about the roundup
of the miss Grants, morons and Dunning Kruger effects specimens
who constitute today's other worse parsons in the world, therons
(29:55):
worse after Trump and Gnome helped kill the drowned kids
of Texas, its Department of Homeland spokesman Mica Bach quote,
it is important to note that every individual in Texas
who called FEMA had the ability to be answered. That's
(30:17):
brilliant phrasing on this idiot's part, the ability to be answered,
which is exactly the same phrasing you would use if
you were trying to explain that everybody who buys a
lottery ticket has the ability to win a billion dollars.
Only the odds are better in a lottery than it
was if you were trying to call FEMA. During the
(30:38):
Texas flooding, actor christinom and Trump got through with killing FEMA.
Micah here Mika was from the Patrick Henry College and
the Claremont Institute, noted for supporting fascism for fifty years,
and he was in the office of Congresswoman's Sparts. So
if you wonder if Trump will destroy American education, Micah
(31:02):
is proof he already has runner up worser. Speaking of
which mehmet Oz, Trump's head of Medicare and Medicaid. And
he went on with poor Stuart Varney, my friend who
literally taught me how to use a teleprompter this time
of year in nineteen eighty one, one of my favorite
(31:23):
people at CNN who got hit by lightning or something,
or who did something so bad that it turned out
this life is clearly proof that this is hell and
hell will be something worse. Stuart gets all of these guys.
He has to sit there and you can see it
pain him. Even though he went through some sort of
(31:43):
religious awakening, conversion, or as I said, he got hit
by lightning. He has to put a smiley face on
kicking millions off Medicaid, just as Trump covers up pedophiles
and RFK Junior eliminates vaccine. Memet Oz comes on Stu's
show and says about Medicaid, We'll be there for you,
(32:07):
the American people when you need help, but you got
to stay healthy yourself. Don't eat carrot cake, eat real food. Well,
this is a kind of oblique argument. I don't know
how much carrot cake is being consumed by people who
are on Medicaid and Medicare. But the point here is
(32:28):
that to underscore this, Oz brought onto the Varney set
a carrot cake. Brought a carrot cake with him on
a stew Varney set and written on it in icing
happy sixtieth anniversary Medicare. So here's a carrot cake, which
Oz then tries to explain to people they can't eat.
(32:48):
I brought it with me to torture you wait, there's
more long before his as you know when you go
shopping for your crudites. The video that helps him get
smoked in the Pennsylvania Senate race, where ninety nine percent
of the viewers said the hell's a cruditae. In twenty fourteen,
(33:10):
Doctor Oz's scam of the month was doctor oz monkfruit
natural sweetener healthy recipe for carrot cake. Doctor Oz boldly
told everyone to throw away sugar and artificial sweeteners in
favor of his next grapevind monkfruits. This natural sweetener has
just one calorie for serving. Try it in Duff Goldman's
(33:33):
monk fruit carrot cake recipe. But the winner Gianni Infantino,
the latest in a succession of slimy presidents of FIFA.
That's the World Soccer Body. No, I'm not playing the
soccer breakdown, although maybe next week. Infantino apparently gave Trump
(33:58):
something called the Club World Cup Trophy, which was played
for by you know, fleets, people who can move their
knees without help, healthy people, not Trump's soccer players playing
in the United States to win. Well, to be fair,
there's a championship in soccer every two weeks. That's why
(34:18):
soccer is popular. We won sixteen different world championships this month.
What was your record? Three and seven? Anyway, he either
gave Trump the club World Cup trophy to keep for
himself and a gold medal, or he let Trump steal them.
(34:38):
This is from the Daily Beast quote. English club Chelsea
easily dispatched France's Paris San German in the final of
the tournament in New Jersey's MetLife Stadium, with Trump joining
the players for the trophy trophy lift. Much to their confusion.
He got up on stage with them. He'll try this
at the Super Bowl if somebody lets him. It has
(34:59):
since been revealed that the intricate prize hoisted aloft by
the London club captain Reached Games was a replica because
the president of football's governing body FIFA has let Trump
use the original as an ornament in the oval office.
Daily Beast reports it's thought to have cost around two
hundred and thirty thousand dollars. They, quoting Trump, said could
(35:23):
you hold this trophy for a little while? We put
it in the oval office, and then I said, when
are you going to pick up the trophy, and Infantino said,
We're never going to pick it up. You can have
it forever in the Oval office, Trump explained in a
midgame interview. He then revealed that the victor's Chelsea actually
received a replica of the original for winning the tournament.
(35:45):
Putin supposedly did this with one of Robert Kraft's Super
Bowl trophies. Didn't he or was it a watch or
a ring? He just kept it. It's not just the
trophy that Trump got his hands on, According to The
Daily Beast, again, The Athletic was among several outlets to
report that Infantino kept a medal aside for his friend
hand it to him after the trophy lifting ceremony. He
(36:08):
didn't actually lift the trophy. But Infantino, who is as
crooked as he is bald, is actually playing the long
game here. He's not as big a moron as he
might see him here. He needs Trump at some point
in the next year to publicly state that no player
or fan who comes here next year for the next
(36:31):
soccer tournament will as much as see Trump isis let
alone be bothered by them, to say nothing of the
upcoming Olympics in La. This is why Infantino keeps giving
Trump shiny gold objects like the goddamned trophy from the tournament. Now, Chelsea,
there are also geniuses here. They're official pictures of them
(36:53):
hoisting the trophy. They photoshop Trump out, just like Maga
will do. Jiohnny Infantino, Trump likes shiny gold stuff. Giohnny,
you better watch shot. He doesn't decide he wants to
keep your golden cube ball noggin in the Oval office
on display. Infantino, Today's other worst person.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
In the cube ball logy.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Finally our number one story in the countdown things. I
promised not to tell him back to my favorite topic, me,
How exactly was I supposed to tell the police that
the man threatening to kill me was the president of MSNBC.
He was chasing me through the studios. He was too
overweight to run. But even though he inexplicably lied and
(37:58):
said he was six foot seven, at six foot five,
this guy his name was Rick Kaplan, and he was
the soon to be ex president of m NBC, just
as he was already the ex president of CNN. He
still had strides as long as my own. Plus On
that night of August eighth two thousand and five. I
was multitasking. I was trying to mentally record everything he
(38:20):
was shouting, while also drawing him away from the live
microphones of the live studio in which he had started shouting,
while also fishing for my office key so I could
lock myself in there if need be, while also figuring
out how I would hit him if it came to that,
while also trying to register the superb double takes from
(38:41):
my colleagues past, whom he was stomping like an out
of shape Frankenstein, while also trying to suppress an overwhelming
and seemingly inappropriate desire to burst into laughter, while still
game planning these soon to be inevitable call to the cops.
A beautiful downtown Secaucus, New Jersey. He's trying to kill me,
(39:07):
my boss, the president of MSNBC. Yeah, yeah, the cable
television network. Yeah, exact down the street from the London
Fog Outlet store YEAP one MSNBC Plaza. I know it's
a dumb address. He's about sixty two seventy five two
(39:27):
hundred and eighty pounds. By the way, he says he's
six foot seven, but he's only six foot five. Why
why does he lie about his height or why is
he trying to kill right? Well, I did a commentary
urging the viewers to stop smoking, and he's afraid of
the mention of blood. Hello.
Speaker 2 (39:43):
Hello.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
As all of this played out in my head, President
Kaplan was huffing and puffing his way through our giant studio,
weaving through the news assignment area, past the makeup room,
down the hallways, nearing the offices of my show Countdown,
and past the bank of a couple of one hundred
television monitors with a different face on every one of them,
each seemingly staring slack at the executive, screaming threats at
(40:07):
the only guy on his own network who got any ratings.
I'll pay you back, I'll get you I'll finish.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Your I'll tell y'all.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
This had all begun roughly ten days earlier, in late
July two thousand and five, an oral surgeon who had
intended to examine a growth on the roof of my
mouth that instead, with one pale look, silently betrayed his
suspicion that it was cancerous. Then he cut the whole
thing out. I was on my way to work anyway.
(40:41):
It was too late to get a replacement, and I
was bleeding so much that our technical director and I
decided to pre record all of my on camera segments
for that night's show, thus reducing the chances of viewers
hearing me say President Bush today while blood oozed out
of my mouth, over my teeth and lips and onto
the desk like I was drecul anchor. When the following Wednesday,
(41:07):
I got the unexpected all clear from the surgeon's office,
I decided to devote some of each night's newscast to
a campaign to help viewers and myself quit smoking. My
premise was a simple one that I had never heard
argued before and have rarely heard argued since, that it
would be a lot easier to quit if you didn't
(41:28):
have cancer then if you did have cancer. I pitched
my producers on the series. I went into Rick Kaplan's
office to get his seal of approval. He was enthusiastic
and supportive, and most rare of all, he was paying attention.
And then I said, I was also going to point
out that if you got the good outcome like I had,
they would merely stick a laser in your mouth and
(41:48):
you'd smell your own flesh burning for like forty eight hours,
and you'd have to keep spitting out your own blood.
Don't say that. He suddenly threw his meaty hands out
towards me in a strangling gesture, and then just as
quickly clamped them over his own ears and closed his
eyes and began actually screaming.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
No no no no no no no no no no
no no no.
Speaker 1 (42:09):
I thought he had gone crazy, as it proved he
was just practicing for going crazy later. I'm sorry, I'm squeamish.
I got the point. I just can't findle references to,
you know, uh the red stuff. Go ahead with the series.
Just toned down the uh, the red stuff. I toned
(42:29):
down the red stuff. And my executive producer is Epovich
sent him the scripts and he told her to tone
down the red stuff a little more. And I went
and I did that too. We all decided to start
the anti smoking series the following Monday, August eighth, two
thousand and five. By nauseating coincidence, that was the day
(42:51):
actor the ABC anchorman Peter Jennings had died of lung cancer.
The MSNBC president had been a producer on jennings newscast.
I had long since written and recorded Jennings obituary, and
now this somewhat cold but still journalistically valid segue would
have to be made. We would have to go directly
from the twelve minute long Jennings oh bit to the
(43:12):
start of our anti tobacco campaign. Eight or nine minutes
into that pre recorded Jennings obituary, Rick Kaplan came out
of his office and walked the fifty feet or so
through the vast open newsroom to where my anchor desk was.
His eyes were full of tears. This is wonderful, he
said quietly. Peter would have liked this. He gave me
(43:32):
a thumbs up. Then he walked to a second desk
another fifty feet away, where his first big hire, a
woman named Rita Cosby, was about to premiere his first
big gamble, her new show immediately following mine. I was
actually moved by Rick Kaplan's comment. I did not once
think of phoning the Secaucus police. But then I began
(43:55):
the anti smoking segment, and as I focused on the
camera and the teleprompter in front of me and detailed
the blood and the gore and the spitting, and how
that was the good outcome out of the corner of
my mind, I saw this weird sight. The President again
left his office and waddled out along the wall thirty
feet ahead of me in the general direction of the
control rooms. Within moments, as I continued to read my script,
(44:17):
he was back in the studio and standing right next
to my camera, gesticulating wildly. I said, they never say it,
but wouldn't it be really easier to quit smoking when
you didn't have cancer than when you did? And Kaplan
responded with the same two handed choking gesture he had
made briefly in his office much earlier. I presumed there
(44:38):
was some simple problem, like that the building was on fire,
but I calculated that I could still make it to
the show's scheduled finished time eight fifty nine to fifty
nine EDT and still survive even if others perished. That's
countdown for this the eight hundred and thirtieth days since
the declaration of misson accomplished in Iraq. I'm Keith Olerman,
good night and good luck you sliver. Rick Kaplan suddenly
(45:01):
screamed from the other anchor desk. I could hear, and
this is my impression of her. Good evening, I'm Rita Cosby.
This is Rita Cosby Live and direct with Rida Cosby,
and I'm Rida Cosby. She was not a big woman,
but she had a voice on her, like the horn
on the Staten Island ferry if it had a cold.
(45:21):
You are over the top. You aren't disgusting. My first
thought was that Kamplan had forgotten that microphones fifty feet
away were live during the premiere of his pet project
sh Rina is On. I actually whispered to him, silly me,
I don't get a half if three days on you
were told by is He Poevits that the piece was
over the top and you needed to cut it, and
(45:41):
you didn't. I still couldn't bring myself to yell back
her in a live studio. I did cut it and
easy read it and approved it. And she said you
had two and Rita's premiere is going on over there
in that sort of direction. Maybe you should yell at
me closer to the assignment desk. Maybe I don't give
a crap. If is He approved it, then she's an
(46:01):
ass and I can't trust you. I can't trust you.
Speaker 2 (46:03):
You're all idiot.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
I can't believe you did this to me. I'm trying
to get Rita's show off the ground, and you start
talking about spitting blood into a garbage can. Well, now
I was getting angry. I couldn't resist. Yes, Rita is
in fact live and direct from that desk right over there.
And if you'll notice, she keeps looking over here at us,
wondering why you are yelling during the first minutes of
(46:26):
her first show. So why don't we move over here? Rick?
I began to move away from him, and we're walking
away from the live mike'son, and we're walking, and we're
walking and Rick and Keith are walking because the noise
isn't really professional. Well we're not talking professionals, are we
We're talking idiots. We were walking and he was still screaming,
(46:47):
you're idiots. I will never trust you again. He had
begun to trot or stumble or whatever he was doing.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
This is not over.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
I will pay you back, self serving garbage. I will
get you, and I'll get that A hole is he
for not staying here and reading that script? How many
times did you intend to say spit blood into a
garbage can before I stopped you. I now realized what
he thought had happened as he had gestured spasmodically at
me while he stood next to my camera. I briefly
(47:16):
let my focus shift to amazement at the fact that
this guy, who had been in TV news for twenty
five years, knew almost nothing about how TV worked. I
explained to him that Izzy and one of her assistants
and I had gone over the script several times and
taken out half of the Gorrier references. Then they suck
at television, and since I can't trust anybody here, since
(47:38):
they won't stand up to you and edit the script,
since you obviously bullied them. He bawled up his fist
and stomped his foot on the floor as he called
me a bully and now going to have to approve
every piece of your copy. By this point, I was
backing into the countdown work area with its array of
(47:58):
desks and all the producers Kaplin had just insulted, and
I knew one of them would dial the phone when
I said, call it cops and call this lunatics boss.
Speaker 2 (48:07):
Did you hear me?
Speaker 1 (48:09):
And if you don't like it and you don't want
to come into work tomorrow, that's fine too. I never
did get that part, but now I had him. I
crossed my arms in front of my chest slowly, like
you have seen every news anchor do in every television
news promo ever shown in the history of the world.
I flashed as evil a slow mo smile as I could, Oh,
(48:30):
I'll be here tomorrow, and then I made a sweeping
gesture back towards my staff, who were both, of course
literally and figuratively behind me, and so will all of them. Suddenly,
at that point, for no apparent reason, Rick Kaplan's hysterics
were replaced by mere confusion. He even stopped huffing at
(48:51):
almost normal volume. He asked me, all of who. Only
at this point did I turn around to discover that
my entire staff had already left the building. There was
nobody there behind me. Of course, there was nobody there.
As Ipovich told me later, he went into the control
room and threatened all them first. So we got on
(49:12):
the phone back to the office. Tell everybody to get
the hell out of the building. She paused and laughed.
I mean, we love you, but we're not crazy. Rick
Kaplan's exorcism was a brief one. He began screaming again,
I'm going to hand your career tomorrow. I'm going to
completely f you up. He turned and stumbled away from
my office. Good luck sleeping tonight. I slept like a stone.
(49:38):
And not because Kaplin had previously threatened to fire me
for not leaving my father's bedside after what they thought
was a heart attack to fly to LA to appear
on the Tonight show. And not because he'd once threatened
to fire me because he didn't like my tie. And
not because he had previously threatened to fire me for
not doing something during live coverage that I had already
done but he thought we hadn't done because he was
(50:00):
watching us, not live but on delay on his DVR
resident of a network. And I slept beautifully, not because
I correctly guessed this would be it for Rick Caplan
and it was. The next day, human resources forced him
to apologize to me, and ten months later his bosses
fired him. Nor did I snooze blessedly because of any
(50:24):
bravery or stoicism or fatalism on my part. But I
slept well simply because of the realization that, even after
all of this, Rick Kaplan was still only the second
or third craziest MSNBC executive I had ever worked for.
(50:55):
I've done all the damage I can do here. Thank
you for listening. I escaped with my life twice that week.
Most of our count on music was arranged, produced, and
performed by Brian Ray and John Phillip Schaneil, our musical
directors of Countdown. It was produced by Tko Brothers. Mister
Ray was on the guitars, bass and drums. Mister Shanelle
handled orchestration and keyboards. Our satirical and pithy musical comments
(51:19):
are by the best baseball stadium organist ever, Nancy Faust,
and she, of course accompanied me on my singing of
Ode to Joy in the original high German. The Olderman
theme from the ESPN two, written by Mitch Warren Davis
Curtesy of ESPN, Inc. Is the sports music. Other music
was arranged and performed by the group No Horns Allowed.
My announcer today was my friend Jonathan Banks from Breaking Bad.
(51:43):
Everything else was, as always my fault. That's Countdown for today.
Day one hundred and seventy nine of America held hostage again,
but just two hundred and eighty four days until the
scheduled end of Trump's lane duck and lame brained term
unless he is removed sooner by Maga and Jeffrey Epstein
(52:06):
be tape. The next scheduled countdown is Monday. Maybe by
then I'll have an announcement on the future of this
whole thing. Till then, I'm Keith Olderman. Good morning, good afternoon,
good night, and good luck. Countdown with Keith Olderman is
(52:35):
a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. Donald
Trump is self destructing over the Jeffrey Epstein cover up.
(00:29):
It is up to Democratic leaders and to us to
help him finish this job. Because even before he attacked
MAGA yesterday as weaklings and Republicans as stupid and said
anybody who believes the Epstein story he sold them is
a quote past supporter, and I don't want their support anymore.
(00:51):
Even before he himself tied the Epstein sex scandal to
his Russian conspiracy and that sex scandal, even before he
turned one scandal into three different scandals, Donald Trump had
already become the president of the Jeffrey Epstein cover up.
Trump is running the Jeffrey Epstein cover up. It is
(01:13):
Trump's Jeffrey Epstein cover up, President pervert, President Epstein, president pedophile,
Trump's Epstein cover up. I want to hear this every day.
I want to hear this every day from a leading Democrat,
every day, and six times on Sunday forever. I wanted
(01:39):
to destroy him, one day at a time. I wanted
to destroy MAGA. I wanted to bury them all under
a mountain of their own amoral, uncaring bullshit the term
Trump used yesterday, bullshit. I want them buried under their
own bullshit forever. Is it disgusting yes? Is it sleezy yes?
(02:09):
Is it what the trumpest scum would do? Yes? Is
it a terrible way to prevent dictatorship and terror? What
there are rules here?
Speaker 2 (02:23):
No?
Speaker 1 (02:23):
There are no rules. Pick up the damn tire iron.
This is campaign gold every damn day. Because Trump cannot
steer out of this skid. First of all, he is developing,
if it is not already fully baked, a sense of
(02:44):
complete invulnerability and a simultaneous sense that he can demand
of his base total loyalty, to the point of ordering
them to protect pedophiles. He can't even admit he has
to steer out of it, never mind take the steps
he would need to steer out of it. He can't
even react to the rather shocking and entirely unreported revelation
(03:06):
that there isn't a minute missing from the Epstein suicide
video edited out by Trump's own people. There is two
minutes and fifty three seconds missing. More on what that
could mean going forward in a moment, but for now,
Trump not only avoids acting on it, or just avoids
(03:26):
it he keeps digging every damn hour President pervert, President Epstein,
President pedophile, Trump's Epstein cover up. It is so bad
already less than a week in that even the White
House Stenography Corps has begun to sit up and take
(03:47):
notice the meltdown. The latest meltdown was yesterday this morning.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
And you mentioned past supporters when you're talking about the
the Epstein issue.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Does that mean that you will affect it the disowning
any supporters?
Speaker 4 (04:06):
You want to know, there's a lot of faith in
certain people.
Speaker 5 (04:08):
Yeah, instead of talking about the things we've achieved, We've
had tremendous achievement, they're wasting their time with a guy
who obviously had some very serious problems who died three
or four years ago.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
Instead they want to talk about the Epstein hooks. And
the sad part is it's people that are really doing
the Democrats work.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
They're stupid. People said this was all a hoax.
Speaker 1 (04:39):
Has your attorney general told you this was a hoax?
Speaker 2 (04:42):
What evidence have you at the Attorney General? No, I
know it's a hoax.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
It's started by Democrats. It's been run by the Democrats
for four years. You had Christopher Ray and these characters
and call me before him, and it's a bad group.
It started to actually look at the Steele dossier that
turned out to be a total hoax.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
They were made up by but the Biden, you know,
and we went through years of that with the Russia
Russia Russia hugs. Why does he keep connecting his Epstein
cover up and Jeffrey Epstein to the Steel dossier. Where
would Epstein and the Steel dossier overlap be tape? Yesterday's
(05:32):
latest self incrimination came only after his remarkable post on
truth social again got ratioed to death by his own people.
Referred to my past supporters have bought into this bullshit
hook line and sinker. They haven't learned their lesson and
probably never will, even after being conned by the lunatic
left for eight long years. Blah blah blah blah blah.
(05:54):
All these people want to talk about, with strong prodding
by the fake news and the success starved Dems, is
the Jeffrey Epstein hoax. Let these weaklings continue for forward
and do the Democrats work. He's talking about his own voters.
He is yelling at his own audience. It is professional suicide.
(06:16):
Let these weaklings continue forward and do the Democrats work.
Don't even think about the talking of our incredible and
unprecedented success because I don't want their support anymore. This
can be arranged. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
Make America great again. Well, he's really serious. He used
(06:37):
both of his catchphrases madness. It is utter madness, and
they see it for the first time in most cases,
and they don't all have to see it. Just enough,
MAGA are calling him the Antichrist. Just enough, MAGA are
asking if he's now going to pardon Gallaine Maxwell, Just enough,
(07:02):
MAGA saying he's now part of the conspiracy. The worst
of the polling has not broken against him yet. Nobody
has asked the question, do you now believe less in
Trump today than you did a week ago? It hasn't
happened yet, but a you gov this week, seventy five
percent want quote all Jeffrey Epstein case documents released. Seventy
(07:27):
five percent of Republicans one of the morons to whom
they handed those three ring binders marked the Epstein files.
In February, rogan o'handley d C. Draino called for all
(07:48):
documents to be released. Called for that twenty minutes before
Trump attacked MAGA also quote, obviously this is not a
complete hoax. I don't want it to consume his presidency,
said Laura Lumer. Great work, MAGA, keep it up, and
(08:09):
they have to. That's what makes this so inescapable for Trump.
These slime have, in the years since Trump descended, have
created their own careers off things like the Epstein dragon
and their portrayal of Trump as the knight who would
slay it. It's not about his presidency or the cover
(08:31):
up or even the victims. It's about their money. And
if it comes down to their money or Trump's presidency,
guess which one goes up in flames. Do I smell hamburning? No,
that's just Trump. Trump has taught them and taught them well,
(08:51):
always protect your money. Keep getting him angry, Keep distracting
him Democrats, keep making him insist. The Democrats made up
the Epstein files in twenty nineteen when Trump was present. No,
not in twenty nineteen, twenty twenty five, when Trump was
also president. Keep getting him to insist. Epstein died three
(09:12):
or four years ago. That would be when Biden was president,
instead of in twenty nineteen, when Epstein actually died. And
Trump was president. Keep getting him to demand that his
cult violate the physical laws of time and space and counting.
Keep getting him to yell at his own audience every
(09:35):
damn day, and six times on Sunday. Pick up the
damn tire iron for the first time since perhaps the
Access Hollywood tape. The Republicans who embraced the MAGA conspiracy
time bomb had its sown under their chests. They do
not know what to do next, so they keep doing
(09:57):
everything all at once. Congressman Tim Burchett says he doesn't
trust the DOJ wants more data, hours after he voted
against the Democratic bill to force the release of whatever
the DOJ has. Mike Lawler told a CNN anchor it
was nonsense that CNN was covering Epstein. The anchor, John
Berman had the balls to destroy Lawler with quote, the
(10:19):
deputy director of the FBI took workof Friday to protest
the DOJ's handling of this. That's why we're covering it.
Nancy Mace called for the death penalty for child rapists,
thinking that nobody would have noticed that. Hours before she
voted to protect Trump and his cover up of Jeffrey
Epstein and child rapists. Charlie Kirk attacked Trump Saturday, one
(10:45):
eightied Monday, told his sheep to trust the government. One
eightied again Tuesday, demanding Trump release more information and fix
the Epstein mess. Mike Johnson, the Speaker of the House,
who comes from a town full of closets, went from
prostituting himself for Trump to insisting Pam Bondie come forward
and explain herself and release everything, and maybe have Glaine
(11:08):
Maxwell testify to the House of Representatives.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
The question here about it that concerns either testifying or
testimony for Julane Maxwell potentially before Congress.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
Or if you would support.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
Members like Margin, Taylo Green or Anapoline A Luna on
the release of subpoena subpoenaing the Epsteine documents from the
DJ whether you would support either of those.
Speaker 6 (11:32):
Yeah, I haven't talked to Marjorie or Anna about that
specific subject, but I'm for transparency. We're intellectually consistent in this.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
We look.
Speaker 6 (11:39):
Reagan used to tell us we should trust the American people.
I believe in that principle. I know President Trump does
as well, and I trust him. I mean, he put
together a team of his choosing, and they're doing a
great job. It's a very delicate subject, but we should
put everything out there and let the people decide it.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Mike Johnson with Benny Johnson, and that's a couple of
ugly small Johnson's right there. That was Tuesday, yesterday. Mike
Johnson said what he said to Benny Johnson was misrepresented. Well,
if it was, he's the one who misrepresented it. But
in underscores, the Republicans are completely panicked over this. They
(12:16):
have no clue what to do next. This isn't in
their playbook. The moment when the streams cross and the
conspiracies collide with each other and with reality, and one
set of your lies contradicts the other set of your lies,
and you have to choose, and your choice is exactly
what you told your cult would never happen. It's perfect
(12:37):
Trump's Epstein cover up. Every damn day now, the Democratic
hierarchy fear apart from the now standard. We're afraid to
do anything, certainly anything that might dirty our loafers. Let's
(12:58):
listen to Schumer and just let them self destruct like
they did over tariffs. All right, they didn't self destruct
over tariffs, just like they did over the access Hollywood tape.
Oh right, they didn't. We stood aside and they got
away with it. Apart from the standard but old timey
politics will resume if if only we just believe hard enough,
you know, like Peter Pan. This Democratic party fear appears
(13:22):
to be that if Democrats push too hard, Panbondi or
especially Dan Bongino and Cash Patel could easily fabricate and
release a new set of documents that implicates only Democrats.
This is actually logical. It certainly would only be about
a three on the one to ten scale of fascist
lying and evil. On the other hand, Actor Bondi promised
(13:46):
to produce the documents and a client list after they
handed out those neat three ring binders in February. Why
didn't the Republicans do this then? What could have better
served their coup plans? What could have better enshrined their
dictatorship than to seize the Epstein case permanently and perjure
(14:09):
their way to who knows what frenzy among the idiot
magabase by releasing documents that only show Democratic perpetrators give
them exactly what they wanted. Hollywood stars democratic politicians. Case
closed that there wouldn't be any prosecutions or anything else.
(14:31):
Wouldn't matter. Somebody would say, Oh, they're all publicly executed.
You just didn't see it on the news. Why didn't
they just make up the worst shit their perverted lack
of souls could have read from their diaries? I mean
made up. I can't really answer that. But they didn't,
(14:52):
did they, And now it's too late. They chose instead
an alternate path lighting the room. They had all locked
themselves in a blaze. There is no way out. They
chose to stonewall, to cover up, to bullshit, to somehow
manage to insult the intelligence of their cult, even though
(15:13):
their cult doesn't have any intelligence. I guess they could
still make up a new Epstein report blaming, blaming, Zor
and Mamdani. But their problem is now none of the
conspiracy theorists, at least a third of the American voting population,
(15:33):
none of them will believe whatever they are now told
by Trump. They are shaken for the first time in
the last decade. This resonates in a way nothing else
possibly could. All that will stick with them is a
four word sentence, Trump's Epstein cover up. But wait, there's more.
(16:01):
There is one move that could make it even worse
for Trump and even better for Democrats, who recognized that
after ten years of buying candy bars, they have found
the golden ticket, if only they'll stop Schumer from eating it.
Axios reports that one of the responses, the more realistic
of the MAGA infected our pitching as a possible way
to minimalize the damage to get some survivors back to
(16:23):
shore is a Jeffrey Epstein special counsel. Oh my god,
a special counsel targeting Pam Bondy in cash, Fortel and
the Trump deep state. Yes, oh my god, ken star
back from the dead, back from hell, but pointed directly
(16:45):
at Trump's heart. Let's go. Please Lord, Please Lord, Please Lord.
Let them appoint a special counsel. Please Lord, give the
Democrats how much time to keep this going? Every day
for weeks, for months, literally for the next quarter, in
seventy five days, because fortan seventy five days from now
is the midterms. But the wild card here Democrats have
(17:10):
to be willing to do this. I don't need Jeffrey
saying we'll get back to you. I need the Gavin
Newsom approach. I want Gavin Newsom to tweet Trump's Epstein
cover up day eight, day fifty day, seven hundred and twelve.
(17:32):
He seems to have the idea, the light bulb went
off over his head. Let's do this, gave do it,
Not wait for the Republicans to do it themselves. Not
let the media do it like that. Whatever happen, get
out there and attach this to everything that happens. Every
time a Republican speaks, just add well, he's doing that
(17:56):
to cover up for Trump's Epstein cover up. For instance,
Mike Johnson says this.
Speaker 6 (18:03):
God, I'm miraculos spared the president's life. I think it's undeniable.
And he did it for an obvious purpose. And his
presidency and his life are the fruits of divine providence.
And he points that out obviously now all the time,
and he's right to do so.
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Mac Johnson says that, yes, God saved Trump. Some Democrats says, yes,
God saved Trump so Trump could lead the Trump Epstein
cover up every damn day and six times on Sunday. Now,
(19:01):
as to what's next on this that Wired story that,
if played correctly not only reignites the thing again if
it ever ever taps down a little bit, but sends
it off to burn down yet another room full of Republicans.
Wired Rights newly uncovered metadata reveals that nearly three minutes
of footage were cut from what the US Department of
(19:22):
Justice and Federal Bureau of Investigation described as full, raw
surveillance video from the only functioning camera near Jeffrey Epstein's
prison cell the night before he was found dead. The
video was released last week as part of the Trump
administration's commitment to fully investigate Epstein's twenty nineteen death, but
it's that has raised new questions about how the footage
(19:42):
was edited and assembled. Now, further analysis shows that one
of the source clips was approximately two minutes and fifty
three seconds longer than the segment included in the final video.
Footage appears to have been trimmed. Oh my god, it's
the equivalent of the Watergate eighteen minute gap. It doesn't
(20:07):
matter what was cut from the original video. It only
matters that something was cut from the original video. It's
like the eighteen minute gap. We think we know what
he was talking about, but it didn't matter in nineteen
seventy four, and it doesn't matter now. It doesn't matter
the stuff cut from the Epstein video could be an
ad for Trump's stakes. It doesn't matter. It's the cover
(20:30):
up that gets you, not the crime. It's what did
the president know and when did he know it? About
how Pam Bondi doctored the video. It's a special prosecutor,
and it's Christmas every day, and it's Gallaine Maxwell textifying
to the House of Representatives, and every Democrat on the
committee would get to ask a different version of this
(20:51):
same question. To your knowledge, miss Maxwell, when did Donald
Trump stop raping children? And then that brings me to
the point I have been hinting at all this time.
There is something else that is either really really stupid,
or really really ominous and grotesque and horrible, or all
(21:14):
of the above. The ex Republican Congressman Justin Amosh wrote yesterday,
there's something so incredibly damaging in those files that Trump
would rather nuke his base in a desperate effort to
get everyone to move on than publicly release the information. Unquote, huh,
(21:37):
something incredibly damaging in a tape about a pedophile sex
trafficking scum? What could it possibly be? I think Trump
has always done this. He always gives us the answer.
(21:59):
He just leaves enough information out there to make a
slight jump. This This is how Trump began his social
media attack on his own cult yesterday. This was the
second sentence quote, the radical left Democrats have hit pay
dirt again, Just like with the fake and fully discredited
Steele dossier. You heard the tape before. He keeps bringing
(22:25):
up the Steel dossier in connection to Epstein. These things
have nothing to do with each other. Or what could
be in the Steele dossier that has anything to do
with Jeffrey Epstein? Quote the Russia Russia, Russia scam itself
a totally fake and made up story. Wait, what's in
the Russia story that it would have anything to do
(22:47):
with Jeffrey Epstein? Where is the Epstein cover up overlap
with the Steele dossier and its lurid speculations and the
Russian conspiracy and its lurid reality. You know exactly where
the overlap is. The not very long leap across the
(23:11):
stream began to emerge the day before yesterday. Why is
he attaching the Steel dossier to Epstein? Sex? In fact,
it's probably more than sex. I think you're in for
(23:35):
a big surprise, Oh, Nancy, right, con.
Speaker 2 (23:48):
Top lap turn Drunkna Din din don.
Speaker 7 (24:07):
Bastu sick got a man fell down from bump, don't kanante.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Falst couple of notes. Still terrified of Trump and still
growing more so. The White House press corps happily fixated
on fiscal policy and whether or not Trump will fire
Jerome Powell. Because the White House press corpse still foolishly
(24:49):
thinks Trump is not the first post reality president, and because,
oh thank god, Jerome Powell has nothing to do with sex.
Each media outlet reported something different about Jerome Powell. Yesterday,
Trump had pulled far right House Republicans had gotten their
permission to fire Powell, scooped Politico. No, it's past that.
(25:09):
It's likely he's going to fire Powell, scooped Bloomberg. No,
he's about to fire Powell, scoop The New York Times.
Then Trump announced, We're not planning on doing anything. And
just to show how far he has separated himself from reality,
he gave us the real story again. He announced quote,
I was surprised he was appointed. Jerome Powell was appointed
(25:30):
by Trump. This is what Politico and Bloomberg and the
Times should be leading with. Trump either does not remember
that he appointed Powell or is trying to lie his
way through that reality in the same vein James Comer's
flailing Biden auto pen investigation. By the way, it'll be
(25:52):
a year Monday since Joe Biden bowed out Comer's investigation documents.
He's been signing them with an auto pen. Then there
is the fascist congressman from Tennessee, Andy Ogles. His second
quarter fundraising numbers are in money raised fifty three thousand,
(26:13):
one hundred and eighty seven dollars, expenses fifty four thousand,
two hundred and twenty five dollars. Andy Ogles is underwater
in campaign money. This may be because most of the
people whose voices Andy Ogles listens to and hears so
clearly in his head don't actually exist. And continuing the
(26:35):
cynical jokes about the campaign by Andrew Cuomo to beat
Zoran Mamdani in the pro forma election for Mayor of
New York in November, after already losing to him in
the actual election the primary a month ago. Here and
the joke is the guy funding Cuomo's campaign is Mamdani.
Because nothing could make mom Danny look better than more
(26:56):
and more Andrew Cuomo. Andrew Cuomo has made a ludicrous
campaign video and posted it on Twitter and other social
media and labeled it in it to win it even
though he already lost it. He got ratioed, not surprising.
The actual material numbers, though, are He got five and
(27:16):
a half thousand likes. Mam Donnie hung a fundraising link
from the video and that got one hundred and eighty
one thousand likes. So the Cuomo video got five thousand
likes for Cuomo and one hundred and eighty one thousand
likes from Hamdani, which prompted this all time classic joke
(27:40):
from somebody supposedly in Sweden named pi Jakobsen quote, If
Andrew Cuomo hates socialism so much, why did he choose
to be publicly owned? Oh that's the best of all time.
(28:02):
Also of interest, here, what's that shiny gold soccer object
in the Oval office? Is it the FIFA Club World
Cup trophy that Trump swiped or is it the bald
head of FIFA president Johnny Infantino. That's next. This is Countdown.
There's his countdown with Keith Oldwoman still ahead on this
(28:46):
new edition of Countdown. I am just about at the
twentieth anniversary of the day I stopped smoking, kind of
all of a sudden. Didn't all get done in one day,
but there was a day where I bought out the
Nicorette supply at two New York City drug stores, and
(29:06):
then I went on the air at MSNBC on a
crusade to try to get across to people one simple
idea that had never previously occurred to me till that day,
that it would be easier to quit smoking if you
didn't have cancer, then if you did have cancer, to
which the president of MSNBC quite naturally responded by trying
(29:27):
to kill me. It was an interesting pro cancer stance
on his part, and cutting to the chase, don't wait
for it to kill you. I'll kill you things I
promised not to tell next first. Believe it or not,
there's still more new idiots to talk about the roundup
of the miss Grants, morons and Dunning Kruger effects specimens
who constitute today's other worse parsons in the world, therons
(29:55):
worse after Trump and Gnome helped kill the drowned kids
of Texas, its Department of Homeland spokesman Mica Bach quote,
it is important to note that every individual in Texas
who called FEMA had the ability to be answered. That's
(30:17):
brilliant phrasing on this idiot's part, the ability to be answered,
which is exactly the same phrasing you would use if
you were trying to explain that everybody who buys a
lottery ticket has the ability to win a billion dollars.
Only the odds are better in a lottery than it
was if you were trying to call FEMA. During the
(30:38):
Texas flooding, actor christinom and Trump got through with killing FEMA.
Micah here Mika was from the Patrick Henry College and
the Claremont Institute, noted for supporting fascism for fifty years,
and he was in the office of Congresswoman's Sparts. So
if you wonder if Trump will destroy American education, Micah
(31:02):
is proof he already has runner up worser. Speaking of
which mehmet Oz, Trump's head of Medicare and Medicaid. And
he went on with poor Stuart Varney, my friend who
literally taught me how to use a teleprompter this time
of year in nineteen eighty one, one of my favorite
(31:23):
people at CNN who got hit by lightning or something,
or who did something so bad that it turned out
this life is clearly proof that this is hell and
hell will be something worse. Stuart gets all of these guys.
He has to sit there and you can see it
pain him. Even though he went through some sort of
(31:43):
religious awakening, conversion, or as I said, he got hit
by lightning. He has to put a smiley face on
kicking millions off Medicaid, just as Trump covers up pedophiles
and RFK Junior eliminates vaccine. Memet Oz comes on Stu's
show and says about Medicaid, We'll be there for you,
(32:07):
the American people when you need help, but you got
to stay healthy yourself. Don't eat carrot cake, eat real food. Well,
this is a kind of oblique argument. I don't know
how much carrot cake is being consumed by people who
are on Medicaid and Medicare. But the point here is
(32:28):
that to underscore this, Oz brought onto the Varney set
a carrot cake. Brought a carrot cake with him on
a stew Varney set and written on it in icing
happy sixtieth anniversary Medicare. So here's a carrot cake, which
Oz then tries to explain to people they can't eat.
(32:48):
I brought it with me to torture you wait, there's
more long before his as you know when you go
shopping for your crudites. The video that helps him get
smoked in the Pennsylvania Senate race, where ninety nine percent
of the viewers said the hell's a cruditae. In twenty fourteen,
(33:10):
Doctor Oz's scam of the month was doctor oz monkfruit
natural sweetener healthy recipe for carrot cake. Doctor Oz boldly
told everyone to throw away sugar and artificial sweeteners in
favor of his next grapevind monkfruits. This natural sweetener has
just one calorie for serving. Try it in Duff Goldman's
(33:33):
monk fruit carrot cake recipe. But the winner Gianni Infantino,
the latest in a succession of slimy presidents of FIFA.
That's the World Soccer Body. No, I'm not playing the
soccer breakdown, although maybe next week. Infantino apparently gave Trump
(33:58):
something called the Club World Cup Trophy, which was played
for by you know, fleets, people who can move their
knees without help, healthy people, not Trump's soccer players playing
in the United States to win. Well, to be fair,
there's a championship in soccer every two weeks. That's why
(34:18):
soccer is popular. We won sixteen different world championships this month.
What was your record? Three and seven? Anyway, he either
gave Trump the club World Cup trophy to keep for
himself and a gold medal, or he let Trump steal them.
(34:38):
This is from the Daily Beast quote. English club Chelsea
easily dispatched France's Paris San German in the final of
the tournament in New Jersey's MetLife Stadium, with Trump joining
the players for the trophy trophy lift. Much to their confusion.
He got up on stage with them. He'll try this
at the Super Bowl if somebody lets him. It has
(34:59):
since been revealed that the intricate prize hoisted aloft by
the London club captain Reached Games was a replica because
the president of football's governing body FIFA has let Trump
use the original as an ornament in the oval office.
Daily Beast reports it's thought to have cost around two
hundred and thirty thousand dollars. They, quoting Trump, said could
(35:23):
you hold this trophy for a little while? We put
it in the oval office, and then I said, when
are you going to pick up the trophy, and Infantino said,
We're never going to pick it up. You can have
it forever in the Oval office, Trump explained in a
midgame interview. He then revealed that the victor's Chelsea actually
received a replica of the original for winning the tournament.
(35:45):
Putin supposedly did this with one of Robert Kraft's Super
Bowl trophies. Didn't he or was it a watch or
a ring? He just kept it. It's not just the
trophy that Trump got his hands on, According to The
Daily Beast, again, The Athletic was among several outlets to
report that Infantino kept a medal aside for his friend
hand it to him after the trophy lifting ceremony. He
(36:08):
didn't actually lift the trophy. But Infantino, who is as
crooked as he is bald, is actually playing the long
game here. He's not as big a moron as he
might see him here. He needs Trump at some point
in the next year to publicly state that no player
or fan who comes here next year for the next
(36:31):
soccer tournament will as much as see Trump isis let
alone be bothered by them, to say nothing of the
upcoming Olympics in La. This is why Infantino keeps giving
Trump shiny gold objects like the goddamned trophy from the tournament. Now, Chelsea,
there are also geniuses here. They're official pictures of them
(36:53):
hoisting the trophy. They photoshop Trump out, just like Maga
will do. Jiohnny Infantino, Trump likes shiny gold stuff. Giohnny,
you better watch shot. He doesn't decide he wants to
keep your golden cube ball noggin in the Oval office
on display. Infantino, Today's other worst person.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
In the cube ball logy.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Finally our number one story in the countdown things. I
promised not to tell him back to my favorite topic, me,
How exactly was I supposed to tell the police that
the man threatening to kill me was the president of MSNBC.
He was chasing me through the studios. He was too
overweight to run. But even though he inexplicably lied and
(37:58):
said he was six foot seven, at six foot five,
this guy his name was Rick Kaplan, and he was
the soon to be ex president of m NBC, just
as he was already the ex president of CNN. He
still had strides as long as my own. Plus On
that night of August eighth two thousand and five. I
was multitasking. I was trying to mentally record everything he
(38:20):
was shouting, while also drawing him away from the live
microphones of the live studio in which he had started shouting,
while also fishing for my office key so I could
lock myself in there if need be, while also figuring
out how I would hit him if it came to that,
while also trying to register the superb double takes from
(38:41):
my colleagues past, whom he was stomping like an out
of shape Frankenstein, while also trying to suppress an overwhelming
and seemingly inappropriate desire to burst into laughter, while still
game planning these soon to be inevitable call to the cops.
A beautiful downtown Secaucus, New Jersey. He's trying to kill me,
(39:07):
my boss, the president of MSNBC. Yeah, yeah, the cable
television network. Yeah, exact down the street from the London
Fog Outlet store YEAP one MSNBC Plaza. I know it's
a dumb address. He's about sixty two seventy five two
(39:27):
hundred and eighty pounds. By the way, he says he's
six foot seven, but he's only six foot five. Why
why does he lie about his height or why is
he trying to kill right? Well, I did a commentary
urging the viewers to stop smoking, and he's afraid of
the mention of blood. Hello.
Speaker 2 (39:43):
Hello.
Speaker 1 (39:45):
As all of this played out in my head, President
Kaplan was huffing and puffing his way through our giant studio,
weaving through the news assignment area, past the makeup room,
down the hallways, nearing the offices of my show Countdown,
and past the bank of a couple of one hundred
television monitors with a different face on every one of them,
each seemingly staring slack at the executive, screaming threats at
(40:07):
the only guy on his own network who got any ratings.
I'll pay you back, I'll get you I'll finish.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Your I'll tell y'all.
Speaker 1 (40:19):
This had all begun roughly ten days earlier, in late
July two thousand and five, an oral surgeon who had
intended to examine a growth on the roof of my
mouth that instead, with one pale look, silently betrayed his
suspicion that it was cancerous. Then he cut the whole
thing out. I was on my way to work anyway.
(40:41):
It was too late to get a replacement, and I
was bleeding so much that our technical director and I
decided to pre record all of my on camera segments
for that night's show, thus reducing the chances of viewers
hearing me say President Bush today while blood oozed out
of my mouth, over my teeth and lips and onto
the desk like I was drecul anchor. When the following Wednesday,
(41:07):
I got the unexpected all clear from the surgeon's office,
I decided to devote some of each night's newscast to
a campaign to help viewers and myself quit smoking. My
premise was a simple one that I had never heard
argued before and have rarely heard argued since, that it
would be a lot easier to quit if you didn't
(41:28):
have cancer then if you did have cancer. I pitched
my producers on the series. I went into Rick Kaplan's
office to get his seal of approval. He was enthusiastic
and supportive, and most rare of all, he was paying attention.
And then I said, I was also going to point
out that if you got the good outcome like I had,
they would merely stick a laser in your mouth and
(41:48):
you'd smell your own flesh burning for like forty eight hours,
and you'd have to keep spitting out your own blood.
Don't say that. He suddenly threw his meaty hands out
towards me in a strangling gesture, and then just as
quickly clamped them over his own ears and closed his
eyes and began actually screaming.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
No no no no no no no no no no
no no no.
Speaker 1 (42:09):
I thought he had gone crazy, as it proved he
was just practicing for going crazy later. I'm sorry, I'm squeamish.
I got the point. I just can't findle references to,
you know, uh the red stuff. Go ahead with the series.
Just toned down the uh, the red stuff. I toned
(42:29):
down the red stuff. And my executive producer is Epovich
sent him the scripts and he told her to tone
down the red stuff a little more. And I went
and I did that too. We all decided to start
the anti smoking series the following Monday, August eighth, two
thousand and five. By nauseating coincidence, that was the day
(42:51):
actor the ABC anchorman Peter Jennings had died of lung cancer.
The MSNBC president had been a producer on jennings newscast.
I had long since written and recorded Jennings obituary, and
now this somewhat cold but still journalistically valid segue would
have to be made. We would have to go directly
from the twelve minute long Jennings oh bit to the
(43:12):
start of our anti tobacco campaign. Eight or nine minutes
into that pre recorded Jennings obituary, Rick Kaplan came out
of his office and walked the fifty feet or so
through the vast open newsroom to where my anchor desk was.
His eyes were full of tears. This is wonderful, he
said quietly. Peter would have liked this. He gave me
(43:32):
a thumbs up. Then he walked to a second desk
another fifty feet away, where his first big hire, a
woman named Rita Cosby, was about to premiere his first
big gamble, her new show immediately following mine. I was
actually moved by Rick Kaplan's comment. I did not once
think of phoning the Secaucus police. But then I began
(43:55):
the anti smoking segment, and as I focused on the
camera and the teleprompter in front of me and detailed
the blood and the gore and the spitting, and how
that was the good outcome out of the corner of
my mind, I saw this weird sight. The President again
left his office and waddled out along the wall thirty
feet ahead of me in the general direction of the
control rooms. Within moments, as I continued to read my script,
(44:17):
he was back in the studio and standing right next
to my camera, gesticulating wildly. I said, they never say it,
but wouldn't it be really easier to quit smoking when
you didn't have cancer than when you did? And Kaplan
responded with the same two handed choking gesture he had
made briefly in his office much earlier. I presumed there
(44:38):
was some simple problem, like that the building was on fire,
but I calculated that I could still make it to
the show's scheduled finished time eight fifty nine to fifty
nine EDT and still survive even if others perished. That's
countdown for this the eight hundred and thirtieth days since
the declaration of misson accomplished in Iraq. I'm Keith Olerman,
good night and good luck you sliver. Rick Kaplan suddenly
(45:01):
screamed from the other anchor desk. I could hear, and
this is my impression of her. Good evening, I'm Rita Cosby.
This is Rita Cosby Live and direct with Rida Cosby,
and I'm Rida Cosby. She was not a big woman,
but she had a voice on her, like the horn
on the Staten Island ferry if it had a cold.
(45:21):
You are over the top. You aren't disgusting. My first
thought was that Kamplan had forgotten that microphones fifty feet
away were live during the premiere of his pet project
sh Rina is On. I actually whispered to him, silly me,
I don't get a half if three days on you
were told by is He Poevits that the piece was
over the top and you needed to cut it, and
(45:41):
you didn't. I still couldn't bring myself to yell back
her in a live studio. I did cut it and
easy read it and approved it. And she said you
had two and Rita's premiere is going on over there
in that sort of direction. Maybe you should yell at
me closer to the assignment desk. Maybe I don't give
a crap. If is He approved it, then she's an
(46:01):
ass and I can't trust you. I can't trust you.
Speaker 2 (46:03):
You're all idiot.
Speaker 1 (46:04):
I can't believe you did this to me. I'm trying
to get Rita's show off the ground, and you start
talking about spitting blood into a garbage can. Well, now
I was getting angry. I couldn't resist. Yes, Rita is
in fact live and direct from that desk right over there.
And if you'll notice, she keeps looking over here at us,
wondering why you are yelling during the first minutes of
(46:26):
her first show. So why don't we move over here? Rick?
I began to move away from him, and we're walking
away from the live mike'son, and we're walking, and we're
walking and Rick and Keith are walking because the noise
isn't really professional. Well we're not talking professionals, are we
We're talking idiots. We were walking and he was still screaming,
(46:47):
you're idiots. I will never trust you again. He had
begun to trot or stumble or whatever he was doing.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
This is not over.
Speaker 1 (46:54):
I will pay you back, self serving garbage. I will
get you, and I'll get that A hole is he
for not staying here and reading that script? How many
times did you intend to say spit blood into a
garbage can before I stopped you. I now realized what
he thought had happened as he had gestured spasmodically at
me while he stood next to my camera. I briefly
(47:16):
let my focus shift to amazement at the fact that
this guy, who had been in TV news for twenty
five years, knew almost nothing about how TV worked. I
explained to him that Izzy and one of her assistants
and I had gone over the script several times and
taken out half of the Gorrier references. Then they suck
at television, and since I can't trust anybody here, since
(47:38):
they won't stand up to you and edit the script,
since you obviously bullied them. He bawled up his fist
and stomped his foot on the floor as he called
me a bully and now going to have to approve
every piece of your copy. By this point, I was
backing into the countdown work area with its array of
(47:58):
desks and all the producers Kaplin had just insulted, and
I knew one of them would dial the phone when
I said, call it cops and call this lunatics boss.
Speaker 2 (48:07):
Did you hear me?
Speaker 1 (48:09):
And if you don't like it and you don't want
to come into work tomorrow, that's fine too. I never
did get that part, but now I had him. I
crossed my arms in front of my chest slowly, like
you have seen every news anchor do in every television
news promo ever shown in the history of the world.
I flashed as evil a slow mo smile as I could, Oh,
(48:30):
I'll be here tomorrow, and then I made a sweeping
gesture back towards my staff, who were both, of course
literally and figuratively behind me, and so will all of them. Suddenly,
at that point, for no apparent reason, Rick Kaplan's hysterics
were replaced by mere confusion. He even stopped huffing at
(48:51):
almost normal volume. He asked me, all of who. Only
at this point did I turn around to discover that
my entire staff had already left the building. There was
nobody there behind me. Of course, there was nobody there.
As Ipovich told me later, he went into the control
room and threatened all them first. So we got on
(49:12):
the phone back to the office. Tell everybody to get
the hell out of the building. She paused and laughed.
I mean, we love you, but we're not crazy. Rick
Kaplan's exorcism was a brief one. He began screaming again,
I'm going to hand your career tomorrow. I'm going to
completely f you up. He turned and stumbled away from
my office. Good luck sleeping tonight. I slept like a stone.
(49:38):
And not because Kaplin had previously threatened to fire me
for not leaving my father's bedside after what they thought
was a heart attack to fly to LA to appear
on the Tonight show. And not because he'd once threatened
to fire me because he didn't like my tie. And
not because he had previously threatened to fire me for
not doing something during live coverage that I had already
done but he thought we hadn't done because he was
(50:00):
watching us, not live but on delay on his DVR
resident of a network. And I slept beautifully, not because
I correctly guessed this would be it for Rick Caplan
and it was. The next day, human resources forced him
to apologize to me, and ten months later his bosses
fired him. Nor did I snooze blessedly because of any
(50:24):
bravery or stoicism or fatalism on my part. But I
slept well simply because of the realization that, even after
all of this, Rick Kaplan was still only the second
or third craziest MSNBC executive I had ever worked for.
(50:55):
I've done all the damage I can do here. Thank
you for listening. I escaped with my life twice that week.
Most of our count on music was arranged, produced, and
performed by Brian Ray and John Phillip Schaneil, our musical
directors of Countdown. It was produced by Tko Brothers. Mister
Ray was on the guitars, bass and drums. Mister Shanelle
handled orchestration and keyboards. Our satirical and pithy musical comments
(51:19):
are by the best baseball stadium organist ever, Nancy Faust,
and she, of course accompanied me on my singing of
Ode to Joy in the original high German. The Olderman
theme from the ESPN two, written by Mitch Warren Davis
Curtesy of ESPN, Inc. Is the sports music. Other music
was arranged and performed by the group No Horns Allowed.
My announcer today was my friend Jonathan Banks from Breaking Bad.
(51:43):
Everything else was, as always my fault. That's Countdown for today.
Day one hundred and seventy nine of America held hostage again,
but just two hundred and eighty four days until the
scheduled end of Trump's lane duck and lame brained term
unless he is removed sooner by Maga and Jeffrey Epstein
(52:06):
be tape. The next scheduled countdown is Monday. Maybe by
then I'll have an announcement on the future of this
whole thing. Till then, I'm Keith Olderman. Good morning, good afternoon,
good night, and good luck. Countdown with Keith Olderman is
(52:35):
a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Host
Keith Olbermann
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