Al Pacino is set to star in a new movie about a man who wins the World Knitting Championship. (+ 18 more dad jokes!)

Daily Dad Jokes (16 Apr 2025)

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Jokes sourced and curated from reddit.com/r/dadjokes.

Joke credits: GiborDesign, Left-Distribution-13, go_zarian, Healthy_Ladder_6198, dadjokeschannel, TooOldToBePunk, CitizenOfTheWorld42, No-Suggestion2467, ThimbleBluff, Kingisonhisway, IrishAmerican95, Leominster845, , Civil-Insurance8668, Opposite-Nebula842, so-bored78, Prudent_District704, firedude1314, Middle-Luck-997, pup_fang

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Tequila will probably not solve your problems, but it's worth
a shot.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work a stick?

Speaker 1 (00:19):
Did you know that the sixth Sense is the sequel
to Titanic?

Speaker 2 (00:23):
Icy?

Speaker 1 (00:23):
Did? People?

Speaker 2 (00:29):
Al Pacino is set to star in a new movie
about a man who wins the world knitting championship. It's
called Scarface.

Speaker 1 (00:38):
Two cowboys are lost in the desert. One cowboy sees
a tree that's draped in bacon. A bacon tree. We're saved,
he says. He runs to the tree and is shot
up with bullets. It wasn't a bacon tree. It was
a ham bush.

Speaker 2 (00:59):
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get the
song Delilah out of my head. I went to see
a psychologist. He told me I had Tom Jones syndrome.
I told him I'd never heard of that before. He said,
it's not unusual.

Speaker 1 (01:18):
What did one uranium nucleus say to the other one?
I have to split?

Speaker 2 (01:28):
My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives.
I replied, no, I don't hate your relatives. In fact,
I like your mother in law a lot better than
I like mine.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
Hey, Dad, who would win a burpen contest, you or me.
I don't know. Son, your gas is as good as mine.

Speaker 2 (01:56):
Roses are dead, violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

Speaker 1 (02:03):
I hate that my friend's funeral was at nine am.
I'm just not a morning person. Did you hear about
the man who was buried alive? I'm told it was
a grave mistake. We'll resume the fund and left. Right

(02:29):
after this message, I had trouble breathing, so I called
my doctor. First of all, he said, stop running. I
can't understand a word you are saying.

Speaker 2 (02:46):
How does Mario surf the web with an internet bowser?

Speaker 1 (02:55):
What's the difference between a well dressed man and a
tired dog a well dressed man? Where's a suit of
tired dog? Just pants?

Speaker 2 (03:09):
What is another name for a grandfather? Clock? An old timer.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
I'm not sure if I like my new mustache or not,
but it's growing on me.

Speaker 2 (03:24):
I've tried to learn the alphabet, but only memorize twenty
five of the letters. I still don't know why I'm
Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones. Stay tuned until the
end of the episode for a bonus joke. We're on
a mission to spread the laughs and groans far and wide,
So please share one of these jokes with your family

(03:46):
and friends today.

Speaker 1 (03:54):
Looking for more dad joke humor to share, then subscribe
to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly roundup
of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for you
to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign up today.
Check the sign up link in the show notes page
or visit dailydadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad Jokes Podcast

(04:19):
is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes page
for social media links and joke credits. This show was
recorded in front of a canned studio audience. What's the
difference between an oral and directal thermometer? The taste