Now that the Pope has passed away, what happens next? (+ 19 more dad jokes!)

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
The bartender says, we don't serve time travelers in here.
A time traveler walks into a bar.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
I accidentally called my iPhone smart assistant surely instead of Siri.
Now my phone is stuck on airplane mode.

Speaker 1 (00:30):
I had a finger amputated today. I asked my doctor
if I could still write with that hand. He said, well,
I wouldn't count on it.

Speaker 2 (00:42):
My daughter finally started looking for a job. I told
her there's an entry level job that people are dying
to get into. When you start with three thousand people
beneath you, working at the graveyard isn't for everyone.

Speaker 1 (00:52):
Though. Now that the pope has passed away, what happens next?
A new one? Pope's up?

Speaker 2 (01:11):
How did the dog get all a's on its report card?
It was the teacher's pet.

Speaker 1 (01:21):
What did Spartaca see when the lion ate his wife? Nothing?
He was gladiator.

Speaker 2 (01:32):
A photon goes to the airport. The ticket agent asks
if there's any luggage to check. The photon replies, no,
I'm traveling light.

Speaker 1 (01:44):
I haven't talked to my wife for almost two years now.
I don't want to interrupt her.

Speaker 2 (01:54):
I wrote a book on how to fall down the stairs.
It's a step by step guide.

Speaker 1 (02:02):
You know the German government hired a bunch of gymnasts
from Prague. Yeah, they wanted a system of checks and balances.
The laughter isn't over. We'll be back after this brief break.

Speaker 2 (02:21):
Are they really going to pick a new pope? Or
are they just blowing smoke?

Speaker 1 (02:30):
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens
a chicken tender?

Speaker 2 (02:39):
What does a clone say to acknowledge the receipt of
a command copy that?

Speaker 1 (02:45):
How many ants do you need to become a landlord? Ten?
You need ten ants?

Speaker 2 (02:56):
How long does a jousting match last until nightfall?

Speaker 1 (03:05):
My wife told me that I should embrace my mistakes.
I gave her a hug.

Speaker 2 (03:14):
Hey, Dad, have you seen my sunglasses? No? Son, have
you seen my dad glasses?

Speaker 1 (03:26):
How did the ancient Romans transport poultry defeed the people
of Rome via the aqueducts? I'm Bob Jeff and I'm
Montgomery Jones. Stay with us until the end of the
episode for a bonus joke. We're on a mission to

(03:46):
spread the laughs and groans far and why help us
out by sharing these jokes with your family and friends today?

Speaker 2 (04:00):
Looking for more dad joke? Humor to share. Then subscribe
to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly roundup
of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for you
to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign up today.
Check the sign up link in the show notes page
or visit Daily dadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad Jokes

(04:20):
Podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes
page for social media links and joke credits. This show
was recorded in front of a canned studio audience. What
did the two day old baby say to the one
day old baby? I was not born yesterday.

All Episodes

Daily Dad Jokes (21 Apr 2025)

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Now that the Pope has passed away, what happens next? (+ 19 more dad jokes!)