Why do Sith Lords’ phones have good batteries? (+ 18 more dad jokes!)

Daily Dad Jokes (27 Apr 2025)

The official Daily Dad Jokes Podcast electronic button now available on Amazon. The perfect gift for dad! Click here here to view!

Email Newsletter: Looking for more dad joke humour to share? Then subscribe to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly round-up of the best dad jokes, memes, and humor for you to enjoy. Spread the laughs, and groans, and sign up today! Click here to subscribe!

Listen to the Daily Dad Jokes podcast here: https://dailydadjokespodcast.com/ or search "Daily Dad Jokes" in your podcast app.

Interested in Business and Finance news? Then listen to our sister show: The Daily Business and Finance Show. Check out the website here or search "Daily Business and Finance Show" in your podcast app.

Jokes sourced and curated from reddit.com/r/dadjokes.

Joke credits: pigeon-in-greggs, Masselein, Yuval_Levi, IthinkIknowwhothatis, IntelligentCreme3457, PracticalRate3346, harryharhar9, bigByt3, alanmitch34, Ok-Ebb5960, FoxDesigner2574, ForemostGamer, , devinh313, EarlessBanana, Ra1dspidey, potatoclaymores, maud_brijeulin, Masselein, PGSneakster

Subscribe to this podcast via:

• iHeartMedia
• Spotify
• iTunes
• .css-j9qmi7{display:-webkit-box;display:-webkit-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webkit-flex-direction:row;-ms-flex-direction:row;flex-direction:row;font-weight:700;margin-bottom:1rem;margin-top:2.8rem;width:100%;-webkit-box-pack:start;-ms-flex-pack:start;-webkit-justify-content:start;justify-content:start;padding-left:5rem;}@media only screen and (max-width: 599px){.css-j9qmi7{padding-left:0;-webkit-box-pack:center;-ms-flex-pack:center;-webkit-justify-content:center;justify-content:center;}}.css-j9qmi7 svg{fill:#27292D;}.css-j9qmi7 .eagfbvw0{-webkit-align-items:center;-webkit-box-align:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-items:center;color:#27292D;}

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
I accidentally gave my wife a glue stick instead of
her lipstick. She still isn't talking to me.

Speaker 2 (00:13):
It'd be a big mistake to start flirting with nuns.
Trust me, you don't want to get into that habit.

Speaker 1 (00:23):
My wife told me to take the spider out instead
of killing him, went out, had a few drinks. Nice guy,
he's a web designer.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
My son asked if trees poop, I said, of course.
How do you think we get number two pencils?

Speaker 1 (00:47):
What did the husband say to his wife after accidentally
sticking his arms through the legs of his jeans, Honey,
I just chewed my pants.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
I just read through six pages of the dictionary. I
learned next to nothing.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
The other day I found out my toaster wasn't waterproof.
I was shocked.

Speaker 2 (01:25):
If you lost an eye and the only way to
replace it was using part of a tree, would you
do it?

Speaker 1 (01:30):
I would. One big difference between men and women is
that if a woman says smell this, it usually smells nice.

Speaker 2 (01:47):
I wrote a poem about the bottom of the ocean.
It's pretty deep.

Speaker 1 (01:56):
I know a lot of jokes about retired people, but
none of them work. The laughter is an over We'll
be back after this brief break.

Speaker 2 (02:08):
What's the best move if you're attacked by clowns, Go
for the juggler.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
I grabbed a chemist and forced him to give me
a vial of magnesium sulfate. He claimed it's assault.

Speaker 2 (02:27):
Why do sith Lord's phones have good batteries? They have
unlimited power.

Speaker 1 (02:39):
It's such a bummer that Islam, Christianity, and Judaism have
all been fighting with each other for centuries. Hinduism, on
the other hand, they never had any beef.

Speaker 2 (02:55):
What's a cow's favorite nighttime activity? Stargrazing?

Speaker 1 (03:02):
Even though it's a lucrative profession. Don't force your child
to become a chopper pilot. You don't want to be
a helicopter parent. How many birds does their take to
change a light bulb? One cannot, but two can. I'm

(03:26):
Bob Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones. Tune in until the
end of the episode for a bonus joke. We're on
a mission to spread the laughs and groans far and wide,
so please share these jokes with your family and friends today.
Looking for the gift for Dad, We have the official

(03:48):
Daily Dad Jokes podcast. Electronic Joke Button now available on
Amazon a massive five hundred preloaded dad jokes guaranteed to
make you laugh and grown. Check the show notes page
for the link. The Daily Dad Jokes podcast is produced
by Classic Studios. See the show notes page for social

(04:09):
media links and joke credits. This show was recorded in
front of a canned studio audience. I spent five hundred
dollars renting a Limo, but just learned that the car
doesn't come with a driver. All that money and nothing
to show for it.