July 4, 2022 • 53 mins
Blair welcomes her dear friend Danielle Perez (Russian Doll, Curb Your Enthusiasm) to the podcast. She comes on to read an ode to her favorite singer, the Queen of Christmas.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello everyone, it's your boy Blair back for another week
of Dear Own Wilson and I just want to, once again,
as I do weekly, thank your assis for listening to
my little program. I really appreciate it. It's great to
be with you. I love you all, and I hope
you're getting through this craziness that's happening right now. Oh
(00:22):
my god, it's hard. It's very hard. God. The country,
I don't know, it feels, it feels sad, it feels bad.
And I guess what can I contribute right now when
there can be these feelings of you know, sadness and hopelessness.
(00:43):
I guess I can try to do my little comedy work.
If that can brighten up someone's day, even for a second, Um,
then that's a good thing. So I'm glad to be
with you guys, and I love you all. Um. We
have such an exciting guest on this week, my friend
and Yelle Perez. She is such an amazing stand up comedian.
(01:04):
She makes me last so hard. Um. She's really blowing
up right now and you can see her on this
brand new season of Russian Doll on Netflix. Really exciting
that she got to work with Natasha Leone and UM.
You can follow her for stand up dates online on
Instagram and Twitter at Diva Deluxe. UM, so make sure
(01:25):
you follow Danielle and yeah rates of scribe review These
reviews really carry the program and determine whether I have
get another season. So I hope if you have a
few seconds you can take the time to leave a review.
I want to start shouting out some of my favorite
reviews so that I can show my appreciation. Pages, what
(01:50):
a great name wrote. Um, just listen to a few
hours of this podcast that consisted of talking about Guy
Fiery and Alvin and the Chipmunks and was really entertained
for every minute. This means something. Yes, thank you, Pages,
I really appreciate your review. It means so much to me.
Thank you, thank you and yeah, also if you can
(02:14):
tell a friend send an episode to a friend. I'm
trying to get the word out, get these reviews and
subscriptions up. Anyways, please enjoy this episode. It was so
funny and so much fun. Danielle is amazing. Follow me
at Blair SAKI B L A I R S O,
C C I UM for all my stand up dates.
(02:34):
I'm gonna be in Seattle and San Francisco this coming weekend.
Then I'll be in Montreal and I'm gonna be bouncing
all around. So if you want to see me, yeah,
look it up. Alright, guys, I love you, Take care
of yourself. Hello everyone, and welcome back to the Dear
(02:59):
Oh Wilson Podcast. See your favorite podcast in mine. Also,
that's why it's my podcast. Drive a treat for you
guys today. And I know that you guys trust me
to come back every single week, weekend and week out
and bring you the best guests, the best guests in Hollywood,
(03:24):
the best guests that you could even dream of. And
boy do I deliver every goddamn week. Is crazy how
much I deliver. Wow. Without further ado, I want to
introduce you to today's guests. You know we're from all
over your motherfucking TV. Please welcome my friend and yours,
(03:48):
Danielle Prez Hi, Danielle, thank you for coming on today.
What a get for us? Oh my god, Blair, thank
you for having me. I feel so I feel so special.
(04:12):
You should feel special. You are a special baby, incredibly special.
And you know you are an alumni of our live show. Yes, yeah,
and you are thrilled on there UM, so it's great
to be with you here in this iteration. I'm so excited.
I know. Now we're on a podcast and it's for posterity.
(04:33):
People come into this forever. That's twenty years from now.
People will be like, oh my god, that's a scary thought. Um,
please forgive me my children that I hoped you have. Um, Danielle,
how are you. What's been up? You've been busy as hell, bitch.
Oh my god, UM, I am good. I'm excited because
(04:57):
I'm in the new season of Russian Dolls. So I
saw that. But you stay booking. It's incredible. I can't
wait to watch. I'm so excited. Think I'm so excited too. Yeah,
it's it was like crazy shooting it. It was so amazing.
Natasha was like I was like acting with her and
then like she's directing, and I'm just, oh my god,
(05:18):
Like you're a boss bitch. You're doing it all. It's like,
and you know that's what I say about you behind
your back, that you're a boss bitch doing it all.
Oh my god, we love to hear it. Yeah, but
you are. I mean, you work your ass off. You're
so funny, you're so talented. And yeah, it feels like
(05:39):
you're really just blasting off. Oh my god, I feel
the same way about you. Really, that's kind of you
to say, thank you. Oh my god. You're doing stand up,
You tour all over you have this podcast, you have
like all these like cool animated series. You're voicing characters,
(06:00):
you know, you know, um even cold. We are produced
Comedy Central animated show. You're killing it, blushing, You're killing it.
You're Oh, I'm getting so shy, Danielle. We're all thrilled
(06:21):
here at the dear On Wilson Headquarters, uh to have
such a celeb and are midst and so I think,
without further ado, we should probably get into your letter
if you could do the honors. Yes, okay, I will
get into my letter. Dear Mariah Carey, Honey was my
(06:43):
summer anthem. I would play it over and over again
as I would dive into my pool fully clothed, only
to emerge from the water in my bathing suit. To
say that you were the soundtrack to my youth is
an understatement. You had a number one single for each
year of the nineties. And while I know you write
all of your songs, the haters do not abandonedly, acquiescent,
(07:05):
and mity incandescent ly. I may not know how to
spell these words, but because of you, I know how
to use them in a sentence. Glitter, charm, bracelet, butterfly, rainbow, Maria.
You remind me that it's okay to be an adult
woman with emotional maturity of a Lisa Frank sticker collection. Well,
I have never worn only a T shirt and heels
while manically passing out ice cream bars on TRL. I
(07:28):
have been ghosted by a man who sleeps on a couch,
and that feels similar. Your episode of MTV Cribs was
nothing short of iconic. Not only did you refuse to
show the cameras and by extension us the viewers Marilyn
Monroe's white piano because you need to keep some things
for yourself, exercised on your treadmills in still Lettos, and
(07:50):
ended the episode from your bathtub. I too, am famous
for my proximity to treadmills, like when I won one
on the Prices Right. Did you see that episode? It
went viral. I appreciate this peek into your life because
it mirrors my own, and I like looking at myself.
I feel like you can relate. I am so inspired
by your generosity and charity work. Whether it's starring alongside
(08:14):
Academy Award winning actress Mirror Sorvino in the two thousand
two Mobster film Wise Girls, or marryed Nick Cannon. You're
always giving back. Jlo may bathe in Virgin's blood, but
you bathe in champagne. Whitney Houston died in a bath tub,
and bathtubs are where you thrive. Speaking of Whitney, she
(08:34):
may have turned the national anthem into a number one record,
but you invented rococo melissamitic singing. I don't know what
that is, but it sounds expensive. Maria. You give hope
to the petty and strength to the shady. You dance
like I do, stairs reluctantly. I aspire to live each
day like you on Year's Eve, closing out, not giving
(08:55):
us a single tuck. Yours truly, Danielle perev Oh wow,
I love her so much? What a letter. I love her.
She's incredible. I mean, she's a once in a generation,
(09:18):
she's a survivor. She's really she's been through it all.
I mean, her career is like decades and she still
stays cranking out number one. Yeah, I mean the way
that she can seeing is there's no one like her
on the earth, and the fact that she's like, you know,
she's in on it now, you know, like a kick
(09:41):
pop with her kids. She just has fun being a
silly mom. She like unapologetically loves Christmas like it's so
corny and she just leans into it. Yeah. And also,
you know what's crazy because I love reading these female
pop stuff, our celebrity memoirs. Uh. They're always such a
(10:03):
good read and you can read them in like one night,
you know, and they have all been all these super
successful women have been through so much shit. It's crazy,
Like you just don't even understand, Like it's I don't know,
is it are those those things that made helped make
(10:24):
them successful or were they just like a crazy part
of like a fate destiny sort of situation. I don't know.
I don't know. I feel like it's a mix of both.
I mean I think it is that like they are
so you know, so much of it I think is
a testament to like their drive and they're just like
I want this and I'm going to make it happen,
(10:46):
you know. And Clawn and scratch my way, you know,
through all this ship. But then I think part of
it is just like that's just like kind of what
you had to deal with. I know, I know, you're right,
they had to deal with so much shit. Like not
only did they have to deal with so much it
once they became celebrities, but it was like they all
had like these brutal family situations and yeah, and then
(11:13):
also it's like, you know, she had her like terrible
like Svengali husband manager, Oh my god, yes, that she
had to uh find, oh my god. And then he
like totally like screwed her. He gave I mean literally
he made j Lo to spite maright Gary, right, right, Okay,
(11:34):
got it. I never knew that was went to such extremes.
Literally all of like Jlo's like first like a few albums,
like all those songs were meant for other people, and
he just met thirty years older than her, right, Yeah,
It's all very disgusting, disgusting, disgusting, sick. Okay, Well, Danille,
(12:01):
it's time that we get into the hard hitting interview.
And since you have stopped by before, you do know
the shrewd interviewing style that you are about to get
involved in, so there's no need to preface and buckle up. Okay,
pass in your seatbelt, Danielle. Danielle. According to Lucian Wiggles,
(12:26):
you remember Lucien right, my private detective I met in
the current River who does all my research in making
sure I get the truth from the people that I interview.
Bringing any bells, Danielle, Lucien um is sounding very familiar. Right, Well,
he's about to sound even more familiar when we get
(12:47):
into these questions, okay, Danielle. According to Lucien Wiggles, Mariah
Carey is known as the Queen of Christmas. Would you
also identify as the Queen of Christmas? If not, which
day would you call yourself the queen of Okay? I
(13:08):
am definitely not the Queen of Christmas? I hate Christmas?
You hate Christmas? Yeah? Because I have to be around
my family? Wow? You never hear people say they hate Christmas.
I don't love Christmas? Okay? Right? And so what do
you usually do at Christmas? So? So, like, do Christmas
(13:28):
songs and Christmas decor do they really get under under
your skin? I don't like Christmas decor because I think
it's tacky. But I do enjoy songs. Okay, so you
like Christmas music that celebrates the holiday that you do
not like? Yeah, because Christmas songs are generally like catchy
(13:48):
and fun, right right right, right, right right, Okay, So
do you like Mariah's Christmas song? I will listen to
that all year round. All I wanted this is you iconic,
Like that's just a joyous song. I love. You know
what I love. I love like hip hop remixes of
Christmas classics hilarious. So I can't say I've ever heard
(14:12):
a person say that before. It's like they're so cheesy.
But like I remember like as a kid, there was
like the c D and I think I had like
a TLC remix of like I'll take any I'll take
any iteration of TLC there is. But do you know
what I'm saying? And it's like also that like you
know that Wilson Phillips Last Christmas, it gave you a
(14:34):
part Like there's like fun stuff, you know, like there's
like I'm not talking about jingle bell rock like funk
that ship. You know, I want the pop songs, the
fun pop Christmas songs, and you're talking about also, you
know a Christmas song done by one of the greatest
vocalists of all times. So you you like you want
(14:56):
a high caliber star singing your Christmas Wilson Phillips Mariah,
and you'll take nothing less. Basically, Okay, Well, what day
would you call yourself the queen of? We are here
and now in this moment forcing you to declare your
queendom over a day. I guess I am the queen.
(15:20):
Oh my god, um, I'm the queen of Like, um,
what's the day when you get an extra hour of sleep? Savings?
That's me? Okay, she's up sleeping in an extra hour, right, Okay?
(15:45):
Simple yet true? Really, just cutting difficult to please. She's
not taking one of the main holidays. No, No, you
can keep Easter, you can keep the Solstice. Look, I'm
an astro bitch. I love you know, I love conjunctions.
(16:06):
Just give me that extra hour of sleep. How are
you feeling after yesterday's Neptune Jupiter conjunction? You know, I
honestly I think it took a lot out of me.
I did do some meditation. I did, like, you know,
say what I want, and I think it's working. You know,
I'm exhausted. I am so exhausted today. And also the
(16:28):
energy I know it was supposed to be like a
loving like release, like, oh things are a little positive
swirl now has come into the ether. When I felt
like yesterday when I was noticing in the air, uh,
the energy felt very chaotic to me, like it was
like sirens wind. The wind was really it was intensity.
(16:50):
It felt like a lot of intensity in the air
to me. Yeah, it felt really Yeah, the wind was
it was too much. It was like this is I'm
feeling rattled? Yeah. Do you think someone in Oklahoma is
listening to the last two minutes of this podcast and
it's like, what the funk are these l a bitches
talking about? You know, they're like, oh, Twister is coming, babies.
(17:14):
You know my followers and fans that are all around
the entire globe and even intergalactically. No that I'm a
crazy bitch. So uh, there's nothing to hide here. We're
all welcome here, and they all welcome. They welcome all
of us. Danielle, I love it. What a safe space.
Oh it's sah, just say space. Thank you for saying so. Okay, So,
(17:39):
according to Lucian Wickeles, in high school, Mariah's nickname was
Mirage because she was always missing school to work as
a demo singer. Danielle, What is your nickname that the
public may or may not know about? Wow um. In
(18:09):
my early twenties, basically until I started doing stand up,
my nickname was Diva. It sounds like somebody else, it's
like really Danielle. So people were like, hey, Diva. People
would just call me Diva, Diva d Literally one time
I was at H and M with my sister and
(18:30):
I got stuck in the elevator and okay, terrifying, Yeah,
you know, I was like, oh my god, I'm literally
just trying to try on like some some dress that's
like not going to fit, made out of like just
like the cheapest polyester fabric. But I'm like stuck in
(18:51):
this elevator and H and M, and my sister's like screaming.
She's like Diva, Diva. She's like freaked out. And then
all of a sudden, I hear like the h the
manager be like Diva remain called but he thought that
was my name. That's hilarious. It's like real people just
like thought my name was Diva, like because everyone would
(19:12):
call me that. Literally, elevator operator in one of the
most harrowing moments of your life, calms over the loud
speaker to speak to you in a way to calm you. Diva. Listen, Diva,
Calm down, Diva. We will be getting you soon. Diva.
(19:33):
What it sounded like basically mortifying but also hilarious, but
also an incredible moment truly to have. And as it's
the queen entire store, be like, there's a Diva in
the elevator. Oh my god? So so do some people
still call you Diva? Can I call you Diva? You
(19:53):
can call me Diva. One thing that's actually really funny
but also terrifying is that, like, you know, I have
like a life for a stand up which can you believe?
I did too? I started late in my life and
I didn't know anything about it before I started. Also, same, same, same, same,
So every now and then I'll be out and about
and someone will just be like Diva, and I'm just like,
(20:15):
because it's likely gotten, you know what I mean. It's
like my past has come back to haunt me. All
these these chickens have come to roost, you know what
I mean? Oh no, what did I do to you?
In a blackout? What did I say? Who did I fuck?
Who did I steal from? Or name? And injure you
know what I mean, It's like, you know, I know
that I'm like kind of notorious, is like oh Janail
(20:37):
is like pretty wild and crazy, and it's like this
is me, this is this is a restrained calm focus
to Yale. If you can only imagine, if you can,
I wrought when I was going by Diva yea God,
I would love to have seen that. I would have
(20:58):
loved you been in that store and recognized the queendom
diva Diva, the diva de Yeah, okay, okay. So I
also feel like my high school nickname could have been
(21:20):
Mirage because like I missed more school than anyone on earth. Um,
you were just ditching sort of yeah, like my mother
ate it in a bedded me because I went to
a private school and I committed to u c l
A early for volleyball, like beginning of my junior year.
So like I already knew I was. I was just
(21:40):
like a ship at kid and I already knew I
had gotten into college, you know what I mean, Like
I'm glad I don't need to do this like I
was like, I'm not really interested. Um no, I actually
really loved school and stuff, but I would I was
just a like dumb teenager, like I was usually reading
a novel in the class, like such a shoot head,
I love you. Um, we're trying to talk to you
(22:02):
about like the geometry. Yeah, and you're just like I
would rather read. It's like, I'm busy if you could
just not bother me, thank thank you. Oh god, it's
so disrespectful to be a teenager. Like, oh my god,
teens are the worst. Have you been watching that the
(22:23):
Girl from plain View? No, I can't watch that ship
Like it makes me sick. I'm too sensitive. Okay, is
it good? It's interesting. I think like Dakota Fanning or whatever,
or l Fanning, I don't know, she's amazing. She's amazing,
she's great, but like, okay, the thing about it is
(22:44):
it's like, okay, teenagers are the worst. They're actually annoying
and fucking like they suck. But also mental illness is terrible. Yeah,
but also like, oh my god, teenagers are the world. Yeah. Yeah,
it's like this really weird mix of like, God, I
hate all of these kids, and I'm you know, but
(23:04):
then it's like, oh, it is sad that like he
killed himself, but also, fuck man, how do you help
someone who's just in such a dark place, very sad,
A lot of mix of emotions. Yeah. I don't really
know the story. All I know is that like a
lot of teenagers are feeling, they're feeling so intensely, have
(23:27):
not learned or lived enough life to develop self regulation
unless they have like very conscious parents that are there
to help rare. Yeah, and I think like that's part
of it and not to be like we gotta blame
the parents, but it's like the girl's parents, it's like
they're so like it's clearly like they're very like upper
(23:47):
middle class and stuff, and it's like you have the resources. Yeah,
but that generation also really doesn't believe in therapy and
like all the tools that are generation does like they
remain sort of disconnected from themselves, and even whether it's
subconscious or conscious, I do believe that they maybe subconsciously
(24:11):
still have this idea or stigma that therapy is for
people that are messed up or like mad. Yeah. So
it's like, but then why weren't they in therapy as well?
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know really
(24:31):
any of my friend's parents who are in therapy. If
they are, it's like a miracle. Um okay, So, according
to Lucien Wigles, Mariah has sold over two twenty million
records worldwide and is one of the best selling artists
of all time. Danielle, do you secretly plan to take
(24:54):
her crown? You already are rapidly taking over television and
what I see as a Macavellian way, how good to
you coming to take Mariah's recording crown? Tell us the truth?
What are your plans? Oh? I mean, I would never
even think to try to snatch myse crown. I mean
(25:16):
to even be in the vicinity of a crown already
would be such a coup. Do you know what I mean? Yeah?
I am. You know what. I like to sing, but
I'm a terrible singer. But I haven't making voice lessons
because like it just is fun for me. I really
want to do that too, because, um, have you improved? Like,
(25:39):
how is it I have improved? I booked a musical?
Are you fucking kidding me? I'm see you aren't such
an inspiration, You're not an asshole. That's like the most
incredible thing I've ever Like, you are so inspiring to
me in every way. You're so kind, I mean fully,
(26:00):
like I think, I'm like, that's amazing. You're just like
really doing it. Um. Yeah, it's funny because I m
am now working with the same acting coaches you. Yeah,
I'm such a man because like when I heard that
you were one of her clients that literally sinched the
deal for me because I was like, Danielle literally stays booking,
(26:23):
Like I maybe this is gonna help me. Um, But
she said, because you know, I lose my voice really easily,
as you can imagine. Um. And then you know on stage,
I'm sort of in a fugue state, So I know
what you mean. So I lose my voice easily. And
I have been told many times that taking yeah, yeah,
(26:47):
because like you learn to use your breath and um
from the throat. Yeah. Because the same thing for me,
Like if I do, like anytime I could do a
comedy festival where I'm like gone per weekend, or if
I go and do shows for a week somewhere, it's
like my voice by the end of it is just
like raw me too completely. But even if I don't
(27:10):
drink a drop of alcohol, Like I'm fully responsible, trying
to take such good care of myself. It's like the
traveling just and being on stage at long, but so
much of like singing is like breathing, which is like yeah,
it's like breathing properly, breath control, and like yeah, but
(27:32):
I'm enjoying it. I like it. It's fine. Have you
been doing it, um for like since since like uh February? Wow? Cool?
And you just started it for fun? Yeah? I started
for fun. My friend James, like he does vocal lessons
(27:56):
and he's like a really great like singer, like he
studied opera and stuff like that. So and I know
that he like does voice lessons like um, like in person,
but he's in San Francisco, so we do it a
resume and but it's like I like, say, I don't know,
I've been trying to like in this pandemic. It's like
(28:16):
what do I like? What do I enjoy? And let
me like kind of focus on those things. I'm doing
the exact same thing. And it's actually been so enriching
to my life, even though I've gotten significantly weirder in
those ships that I've been pursuing. Wow, yeah, but I
(28:37):
feel like it's like those things, It's like that's what
makes you you, That's what makes you like exciting and different,
and like that's what people are gonna relate to and
be excited about. You know. Here's helping Danielle myself. I
don't know. Yeah, I'm just I'm like I mean, not
(29:01):
to derail. No, I love to derail. And here we
always come back. We we even And now that's what
it's about over here. But like at the beginning of
the pandemic, I was so like, oh my god, like
everything I worked towards is gone and stand up, stand up,
you know. I was so like show show shows, And
now it's just like what do what Am I really
(29:22):
interested in? What am I reading? What sparks joy creatively?
You know? And I think the stuff that's like more
important done sets, sets, sets, you know what I mean.
It's like that's the stuff that's going to like bring
like cool ideas to maybe like develop like shows or
live shows or just stuff. You know. Yeah, I just
(29:45):
think it makes you also more vibrant to be like
breaking things up, changing things up, you know, getting new
energy and trying new things and like having more fun
in your life, like just makes you a more attractive person.
Yeah out, Oh my god, should we like call Tony
Robbins and tell him that he's done and we're taking
(30:06):
his place? Finished? Bye bye, Tony. Okay, So, danielle O
Mariah was married to infamous Impregnator procreator Octo father Nick
Cannon from two thousand eight to two thousand sixteen. Please
tell our listeners do you also plan to have a
(30:28):
baby with Nick Cannon? I do not plan on having
a baby. Really will tell us why you do not
plan to have a baby with Nick Cannon. I don't
know if he can support any more children, right, I mean,
that's the truth, you know what I mean. It's baby daddy.
(30:50):
Don't need a broke baby daddy. It's not like you know,
little Wayne has a whole department, you know, just sending
out those baby mama checks and I don't. Yeah, I
don't wilding out and paying that good, you know what
I mean? MTV now part of the paramount plus not
I don't know if they can cut checks like that. Yeah, okay,
(31:15):
fair enough, good reason. Yeah, I think I think that's
probably smart. Like at this point, I think you'd have
our time remembering the names of all his kids. You know, yeah,
I just like Eddie Murphy can afford to have ten kids, right, yeah, yeah,
because he was just like making hits left and right. Yeah. Yeah.
(31:38):
He's got residies coming in, right. We need to get
residies also, we're trying to get those resigies. Want resigy money, Yeah,
we need those residies. Okay. So in two thousand five,
Mariah came out with the Emancipation of Mimi, which became
the best selling album in the US and included one
(32:00):
of the best tracks ever in the world, we Belong Together.
Please tell us what is the emancipation of Danielle and
who do you belong with? Oh? The Emancipation of Danielle
is um, Oh my god, the Emancipation of Danielle I
think has really been um mommy doing stand up? Frankly, Yeah,
(32:25):
how did you start? Like? What? What? What made you
start stand up? Okay for real? So Madison my bff,
Madison Shepherd, Yes, lover. Um. She was living with this
comedian and so we started going to his shows and
by the third one, I was like, he's not funny,
I'm funny. I was like, madisone how do we do
(32:46):
stand up. He's not funny. I'm funny. Oh god, I
feel like that's so many female stand ups origin story.
And she's like, we go to open Miggs and I
was like okay. So we went and open mic and
I really thought we were there to watch, and then
she like signed our names up and I was like what,
(33:06):
and she's like, it's okay, I'll go first. So she
was like number seven and I was number eight. And
it was at this literally is at this coffee shop
that doesn't even exist anymore on Sunset across from Meldown.
It was called rock Paper, but like I just like
started talking about my life and people like we're paying
attention to me. I'm laughing, and I was like, oh
(33:27):
my god, I need this for the rest of my life.
I was like, I've never done Heroin, but I feel
like it's something close to that, just like chasing that
dragon Jason that high, and I just yeah, immediately fell
in love and was like, Okay, I guess we do
stand up now. And like it was just like doing
(33:48):
open mics constantly, fully obsessed. And I think like also
just because like I started in l a like very
soon like after I started, it was like and Strick
and Williams did Conan and I was like, and in
Solomon did Georgio did Conan, and it was like, oh,
I see, like kind of what can happen with stand up,
(34:09):
you know, And I was like, okay, well I want
that to happen for me, so I have to just
like work really hard to do stand up so that
I can't that. I just like, yeah, I immediately fell
in love with it, and I like, I started stand
up at thirty like a lunatic. Like literally, I love
the illusional woman, like I have a thirty year old
woman and I'm gonna start entertainment. I love that though,
(34:34):
like because you know, so many people live their whole
lives with never ever listening to that thing inside them
of what they want to do, because they just have
too many logical reasons why not to, you know, like
there's every reason in the world not to start stand
up or do stand up be in dignities. But it
was just like you felt it and it was true
(34:56):
for you. Yeah, that was definitely like the emancipation of Danielle.
I feel that's so cool. I love it. And who
do you belong with? Danielle? I belong with Angus Cloud.
Was Angus Cloud, he's fast from Euphoria. Oh you know,
(35:20):
my asses not watching you for it. I'm obsessed with him.
He's such a cutey. He's such a high little I'm
googling him. Cuty just fully out to a lot and
she just fully just like, oh no, I should the
clip of this guy yes where he like couldn't even
answer the question. He was like, do how is it
(35:44):
emotional for you? And he said no, thanks? What a name?
Angus Cloud. He's from like Oakland in the Bay Area. Wow,
he sounds like he's like in um from Grapes of
Wrath or something. Um. Okay, didn't yell and Angus Cloud
(36:08):
forever move over? LEXI No, because everyone talks about how
Euphoria is like the best show we had show. It's
truly not. It's like it's fine, but people love it
and like I think it's drama. Its intensity, you know,
(36:28):
it's like beautiful, Like here's the thing, it's gorgeous. It's beautiful.
There are like really amazing moments, but it's like, if
we're gonna be real, it's it's very thinly written, like
it's not great writing. Okay, last you are the producer, writer, director,
and you're hearing this and you think I'd be perfect
for it. Um, besides that, for sure, Sam Levinson listening,
(36:54):
we're both avail well. I mean he did a really
amazing choice in hiring Martha to Kelly as like this
incredible villain. I mean, yeah, we just had her on
and we were talking about it, and I was telling
her because we share Mortha and I are like both
so sensitive, like don't watch a lot of scary or
intention like that, and I was like more of a
(37:16):
I heard you were on and I was dying to
watch it, but I couldn't because, like I tried to
get through the first episode and it made me feel sick.
It's you know what's like funny, did you see Like
Britney Spears is like Instagram post about how watching Euphoria
calms her down right and from anxiety, and it's like,
oh my god, what the traumas that Britney has been
(37:36):
through that this is soothing for her. I think that's
like a very normal phenomenon for a lot of people.
You know me, I'm very deep into the psychological theories
of today and when you're used to that those extreme
chemicals of that you get from hit to emotion, like
you want to keep those going, or like it feels
(37:58):
almost like a relief from numbness sometimes, don't you think,
Like a lot of people that are really into horror,
I'm not into horror, so I don't understand it, right, Yeah,
I don't either. I'm like, I don't want to see
someone get brutally murdered. But maybe I'm weak Danyell, Oh
my god, are you are not weak? You're not at all?
(38:18):
Were strong at people? I know? Yeah? Then guilt? Oh
thanks bitch? Oh my god, they're nowhere to be found today.
But who needs anyways. According to Lucian Wiggles, Mariah sites
(38:45):
Marilyn Monroe as one of her biggest idols. Danielle, who
is your biggest idol? Lucian told me that he thinks
that you were going to say him. Um, he bet
me a new fresh water fishing lure and a bag
of worms that you would say he is your idol,
but you barely remember who he was, so it looks
like I'm getting motherfucking bag of worms. Get those worms,
(39:09):
enjoy those worms, Blair, Yeah, because Maria is my idol
and true idol she is like I truly am obsessed
with Maria, Like I want, I want, like I want
everything Maria has. I want to just like live in
my bathtub, hang out and like gorgeous gowns. I do
(39:34):
love the gowns. She's always in a gown like sort
of a Grecian sort of a Grecian thing going. I
always want to have like a fresh blowout. Yeah yeah,
I feel like shady when people like you know someone
I don't like and just be like I don't know her.
I love that. I don't blow out my own hair.
(39:57):
I go to dry bar. You're the BA, so you're
such as diva. But you know what Maria carry level.
They come to her, you know what. I know that's
the next level. I think you'll be there soon. But
you do bring a lot of glamour to you, like
you always have like a beat face, the nails, the
hair like out like you really come come ready. Thank you,
(40:20):
we're trying. Yeah that's m C m C squared level. Um, okay,
well thank you. I am now the proud new owner
of a new freshwater fishing lure and a bag worms yea.
According to Lucien, Mariah famously said about Jennifer Lopez. I
(40:42):
don't know her. We all know that quote. What is
your personal favorite way to shade your enemies? And then
please list all of them for us? Oh my god? Um,
and don't leave any thank you? Oh my god. I
(41:04):
mean a classic is not remembering them? Right? Okay? Oh
so that's a purposeful, calculated shade, hysterical. It is cruel,
and it is evil. It's pretty mean, but it drives
(41:26):
people insane. That's so funny because you know what that's. Um,
it seems to be amongst my friends like comedians, number
one thing that trigger they get upset about, which is
so funny to me. I've never understood that. I always
people get mad when I reintroduced myself, and it's not
because I forget them. It's because I don't expect them
(41:47):
to remember remember me, and not in like a low
self esteem way. It's just like I don't need the book. Yeah. Yeah,
but that's really funny. That really makes you laugh. I
will be thinking about that for a long time. Um,
you did you do follow your idol? Okay? And if
you could list your enemies now one through ten? Oh,
(42:11):
is this going to be bleeved? We can negotiate. My
enemies are the DoorDash driver that forgot my orange Fanta yesterday.
Oh okay, yeah that was really I really was looking
forward to that, right, I was the where do you
(42:33):
order from? By the way? Popeyes? Okay? Good? Yeah, I'm
so curious, you know what I mean? How are you
going to have Popeyes and not have like, you know,
like a orange Like A'm not gonna eat drink water
with that. I want the orange soda, you know. Yeah,
you really completely robust flavor beverage. Exactly right. I get
(43:00):
what you're saying. Um, my enemies, Um the inaccessibility at
Dynasty Typewriter. Oh sure, okay, yeah, just full stairs, no ramps. Um,
how do you deal with that? Does? What do you
do in those situations? Because like that's a whole another thing,
(43:23):
Like you're such a badass. I mean, I mean it's like,
I don't know, It's to the point where I'm just
like I'm so tired of it, you know. Yeah, I
feel like I'm like I've been a good sport for
seven years. I can't even you are you know, get
a ramp at this point. It's like you're not going anywhere.
(43:48):
Yeah no, But it's like people have to carry me,
which is like, you know, we all are doing like
the best we can find, but it's like it's not
really fair to um, it's not really fair to me.
It's like, you know, frankly, not very safe for any
of us. You know, you know, something happens to them.
It's like, well, you know, right, just get a ramp,
(44:13):
get a ramp, get a ramp. So that's an enemy
of mine. Um, it was my third enemy. My third
enemy is do I have any more enemies? I'd have
to say if I could say one of mine, which
you know, I try not to have enemies because yeah,
(44:35):
I'm working on that. I'm not really at Mariah's level.
But my dentists. Yeah, if I can call my dentist
my enemy because I feel, um, I feel that she
doesn't have my best interest and um, that she doesn't
know me enough. And I'm always like oh yeah, and
I'm like, no, not for cleaning, just for like bullshit
(45:00):
whatever they're doing in there, And I'm like this, give
me laughing, gus, bitch, I feel you're trying to uh,
you're not listening to me. Yeah, just like gass me up, girl. Yeah,
So okay, next time I go to my dentist, I
will say nice to meet you, and uh, it's going
to be my strategy. Nice to meet you, Larry. You've
(45:25):
been coming here for five years. It's really good to
meet you. Um okay. According to Lucian Wiggles, the song
Obsessed is about Eminem, who apparently kept shifting on Maria
(45:46):
for a while. I do remember this in multiple songs,
and my question to you is how do you personally
deal with any haters? And is it always through song
like your idol? You know I I don't deal with
the haters through song to Maria. I deal with haters
(46:08):
by talking trash about them to all of my friends
number one, letting them know they are persona and on Gratta,
letting them know they're on the ship list. I want
I block you, got a block to oh whoa? I
literally truly if I don't like someone, I don't funk
with them. I just blocked them on social media. Really yeah,
(46:32):
because odds of me running into them I r l
in a pandemic girl never right, okay, then some of
them seeing them even out and about It's like I'm
mostly gonna mostly the easiest way for you to find
me or interact with me is online, so we're cutting
that right off. Wow, oh my god, So I like
(46:53):
I sort of like this bold moves telling the universe
exactly where you're at, energetically extremely clear. No one is confused,
No one's confused. It's like blocked done by not not
not engaging, refusing to interact, because what are you gonna do?
Are you gonna come up to me and be like,
why did you block me? That's so aggressive and actually crazy? Um,
(47:20):
so do you block all your exes? Then? Uh? Yeah, wow? Nice,
Yeah I do. Oh my god, this is soul enlightening
to me. Okay. Danielle Mariah's fan base is known as
the Lamily Yes, a combination of the word lamb and family. Danielle,
(47:48):
what unhinged and unwell? Combination of words do you use
to refer to your pants? Oh my fans? Okay, So
I definitely think stand is one of stands stand stand
(48:10):
music stands, except for their Danielle freaks. Danielle freaks. Uh,
I just I want stands to be one of the words. Okay,
you can have that. You're the boss here, you're the
orchestrated doctor. Yes, you are, bitch. Oh my god. Um,
(48:34):
I'm all like blow stands. I'm so stupid. How do
you can find words? I'm like blowout, I'm like what
does what? What are things? Danielle likes diva diva song, singing,
being rich and on TV. Yes, she loves it on TV. Um, okay,
(48:56):
are we going to go with stands? Inn? But stands
are so basic? Yeah, but sometimes simple packs a big punch, folks.
I guess we can keep thinking on it too. Well, Workshop,
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not bringing the rapid
fire quick. Janielle, don't worry. You come as you are,
(49:17):
just like del Mariah Carry And I think that's a
lesson for all of us today. It's just to be
where you're at, Be where you up. Baby, I'll come
in for the crown. Actually, um, Danielle doesn't want to
snatch up at eye will that leaves an opening for me? Okay, Blair,
(49:44):
I'm not mad at it. I know everyone's clamoring for
me to begin my singing career. Um okay. Well, that
has been the conclusion of our shrewd and hard hitting interview.
We do one segment lift that we like to ask
our guests and it's called Fan on the Street. Okay,
(50:07):
Tree Tree Tree, Yes, world famous segment where we ask
our guests if they've had any fun celebrity encounter anecdote
(50:29):
that they'd like to share with the class. Oh like
me with a celebrity, Like I have a fun one.
Oh okay, uh funs love encounter. Um okay. I was,
this is so silly, It's very silly. I love it.
(50:51):
We love silly here. So um oh my god. This
was like literally years ago. This was like early two thousand's,
you know when like um, Rachel Zoe dressed like Lindsay
and all the girls. She was dressing all the dolls,
and so I was on Robertson you know where the
(51:14):
IVY is, you know this kids and uh kids in
and all that, and I was like in a boutique
and um, I was like looking at clothes and then
like this woman was like, oh my god, I love
everything they have, and I like turned her. I was like,
I know it's also cute. And I'm like having a
full conversation about how cute. All this closes and then
(51:36):
like during the conversation I realized I'm talking to Brandy,
like I want to be down Brandy like Brandy for
my youth, Brandy like Brandy went to the problem with
Kobe Bryant Brandy and so when yes, oh my god,
Blair coming for the crowd. But um, and so I'm
(52:01):
like having this like very like normal like you know,
like how like girls like you know, girls in the
dressing room have a conversation kind of vibe. But like
I realized I'm talking to Brandy, and so all of
a sudden, my eyes just like bug out and I
start freaking out because I'm like, I'm talking to Brandy.
But she was like totally normal and really nice, and
that was really cool. She sounds so nat That is
(52:24):
a really that's a really fun one. I was fun.
That was nice for our time, for our youth. That's
a really good one. That's a really fun one. That
was a fun one. And I am enjoying Brandy and
even immensely in the show Queens right now. Yes, it
it's so good. It makes me happy. I'm like really glad.
I'm like the music I love. Yes, it's really fun. Well, Danielle,
(52:51):
thank you so much for coming on the show. It's
been a real gift to us and all the fans. Worldwide.
Thank you and if you're a fan of me, you know,
just be a stand. Stands, be a stand. You already
here first folks, Dan yell love you by love you Blair. Bye,
Hello everyone, it's your boy Blair back for another week
of Dear Own Wilson and I just want to, once again,
as I do weekly, thank your assis for listening to
my little program. I really appreciate it. It's great to
be with you. I love you all, and I hope
you're getting through this craziness that's happening right now. Oh
(00:22):
my god, it's hard. It's very hard. God. The country,
I don't know, it feels, it feels sad, it feels bad.
And I guess what can I contribute right now when
there can be these feelings of you know, sadness and hopelessness.
(00:43):
I guess I can try to do my little comedy work.
If that can brighten up someone's day, even for a second, Um,
then that's a good thing. So I'm glad to be
with you guys, and I love you all. Um. We
have such an exciting guest on this week, my friend
and Yelle Perez. She is such an amazing stand up comedian.
(01:04):
She makes me last so hard. Um. She's really blowing
up right now and you can see her on this
brand new season of Russian Doll on Netflix. Really exciting
that she got to work with Natasha Leone and UM.
You can follow her for stand up dates online on
Instagram and Twitter at Diva Deluxe. UM, so make sure
(01:25):
you follow Danielle and yeah rates of scribe review These
reviews really carry the program and determine whether I have
get another season. So I hope if you have a
few seconds you can take the time to leave a review.
I want to start shouting out some of my favorite
reviews so that I can show my appreciation. Pages, what
(01:50):
a great name wrote. Um, just listen to a few
hours of this podcast that consisted of talking about Guy
Fiery and Alvin and the Chipmunks and was really entertained
for every minute. This means something. Yes, thank you, Pages,
I really appreciate your review. It means so much to me.
Thank you, thank you and yeah, also if you can
(02:14):
tell a friend send an episode to a friend. I'm
trying to get the word out, get these reviews and
subscriptions up. Anyways, please enjoy this episode. It was so
funny and so much fun. Danielle is amazing. Follow me
at Blair SAKI B L A I R S O,
C C I UM for all my stand up dates.
(02:34):
I'm gonna be in Seattle and San Francisco this coming weekend.
Then I'll be in Montreal and I'm gonna be bouncing
all around. So if you want to see me, yeah,
look it up. Alright, guys, I love you, Take care
of yourself. Hello everyone, and welcome back to the Dear
(02:59):
Oh Wilson Podcast. See your favorite podcast in mine. Also,
that's why it's my podcast. Drive a treat for you
guys today. And I know that you guys trust me
to come back every single week, weekend and week out
and bring you the best guests, the best guests in Hollywood,
(03:24):
the best guests that you could even dream of. And
boy do I deliver every goddamn week. Is crazy how
much I deliver. Wow. Without further ado, I want to
introduce you to today's guests. You know we're from all
over your motherfucking TV. Please welcome my friend and yours,
(03:48):
Danielle Prez Hi, Danielle, thank you for coming on today.
What a get for us? Oh my god, Blair, thank
you for having me. I feel so I feel so special.
(04:12):
You should feel special. You are a special baby, incredibly special.
And you know you are an alumni of our live show. Yes, yeah,
and you are thrilled on there UM, so it's great
to be with you here in this iteration. I'm so excited.
I know. Now we're on a podcast and it's for posterity.
(04:33):
People come into this forever. That's twenty years from now.
People will be like, oh my god, that's a scary thought. Um,
please forgive me my children that I hoped you have. Um, Danielle,
how are you. What's been up? You've been busy as hell, bitch.
Oh my god, UM, I am good. I'm excited because
(04:57):
I'm in the new season of Russian Dolls. So I
saw that. But you stay booking. It's incredible. I can't
wait to watch. I'm so excited. Think I'm so excited too. Yeah,
it's it was like crazy shooting it. It was so amazing.
Natasha was like I was like acting with her and
then like she's directing, and I'm just, oh my god,
(05:18):
Like you're a boss bitch. You're doing it all. It's like,
and you know that's what I say about you behind
your back, that you're a boss bitch doing it all.
Oh my god, we love to hear it. Yeah, but
you are. I mean, you work your ass off. You're
so funny, you're so talented. And yeah, it feels like
(05:39):
you're really just blasting off. Oh my god, I feel
the same way about you. Really, that's kind of you
to say, thank you. Oh my god. You're doing stand up,
You tour all over you have this podcast, you have
like all these like cool animated series. You're voicing characters,
(06:00):
you know, you know, um even cold. We are produced
Comedy Central animated show. You're killing it, blushing, You're killing it.
You're Oh, I'm getting so shy, Danielle. We're all thrilled
(06:21):
here at the dear On Wilson Headquarters, uh to have
such a celeb and are midst and so I think,
without further ado, we should probably get into your letter
if you could do the honors. Yes, okay, I will
get into my letter. Dear Mariah Carey, Honey was my
(06:43):
summer anthem. I would play it over and over again
as I would dive into my pool fully clothed, only
to emerge from the water in my bathing suit. To
say that you were the soundtrack to my youth is
an understatement. You had a number one single for each
year of the nineties. And while I know you write
all of your songs, the haters do not abandonedly, acquiescent,
(07:05):
and mity incandescent ly. I may not know how to
spell these words, but because of you, I know how
to use them in a sentence. Glitter, charm, bracelet, butterfly, rainbow, Maria.
You remind me that it's okay to be an adult
woman with emotional maturity of a Lisa Frank sticker collection. Well,
I have never worn only a T shirt and heels
while manically passing out ice cream bars on TRL. I
(07:28):
have been ghosted by a man who sleeps on a couch,
and that feels similar. Your episode of MTV Cribs was
nothing short of iconic. Not only did you refuse to
show the cameras and by extension us the viewers Marilyn
Monroe's white piano because you need to keep some things
for yourself, exercised on your treadmills in still Lettos, and
(07:50):
ended the episode from your bathtub. I too, am famous
for my proximity to treadmills, like when I won one
on the Prices Right. Did you see that episode? It
went viral. I appreciate this peek into your life because
it mirrors my own, and I like looking at myself.
I feel like you can relate. I am so inspired
by your generosity and charity work. Whether it's starring alongside
(08:14):
Academy Award winning actress Mirror Sorvino in the two thousand
two Mobster film Wise Girls, or marryed Nick Cannon. You're
always giving back. Jlo may bathe in Virgin's blood, but
you bathe in champagne. Whitney Houston died in a bath tub,
and bathtubs are where you thrive. Speaking of Whitney, she
(08:34):
may have turned the national anthem into a number one record,
but you invented rococo melissamitic singing. I don't know what
that is, but it sounds expensive. Maria. You give hope
to the petty and strength to the shady. You dance
like I do, stairs reluctantly. I aspire to live each
day like you on Year's Eve, closing out, not giving
(08:55):
us a single tuck. Yours truly, Danielle perev Oh wow,
I love her so much? What a letter. I love her.
She's incredible. I mean, she's a once in a generation,
(09:18):
she's a survivor. She's really she's been through it all.
I mean, her career is like decades and she still
stays cranking out number one. Yeah, I mean the way
that she can seeing is there's no one like her
on the earth, and the fact that she's like, you know,
she's in on it now, you know, like a kick
(09:41):
pop with her kids. She just has fun being a
silly mom. She like unapologetically loves Christmas like it's so
corny and she just leans into it. Yeah. And also,
you know what's crazy because I love reading these female
pop stuff, our celebrity memoirs. Uh. They're always such a
(10:03):
good read and you can read them in like one night,
you know, and they have all been all these super
successful women have been through so much shit. It's crazy,
Like you just don't even understand, Like it's I don't know,
is it are those those things that made helped make
(10:24):
them successful or were they just like a crazy part
of like a fate destiny sort of situation. I don't know.
I don't know. I feel like it's a mix of both.
I mean I think it is that like they are
so you know, so much of it I think is
a testament to like their drive and they're just like
I want this and I'm going to make it happen,
(10:46):
you know. And Clawn and scratch my way, you know,
through all this ship. But then I think part of
it is just like that's just like kind of what
you had to deal with. I know, I know, you're right,
they had to deal with so much shit. Like not
only did they have to deal with so much it
once they became celebrities, but it was like they all
had like these brutal family situations and yeah, and then
(11:13):
also it's like, you know, she had her like terrible
like Svengali husband manager, Oh my god, yes, that she
had to uh find, oh my god. And then he
like totally like screwed her. He gave I mean literally
he made j Lo to spite maright Gary, right, right, Okay,
(11:34):
got it. I never knew that was went to such extremes.
Literally all of like Jlo's like first like a few albums,
like all those songs were meant for other people, and
he just met thirty years older than her, right, Yeah,
It's all very disgusting, disgusting, disgusting, sick. Okay, Well, Danille,
(12:01):
it's time that we get into the hard hitting interview.
And since you have stopped by before, you do know
the shrewd interviewing style that you are about to get
involved in, so there's no need to preface and buckle up. Okay,
pass in your seatbelt, Danielle. Danielle. According to Lucian Wiggles,
(12:26):
you remember Lucien right, my private detective I met in
the current River who does all my research in making
sure I get the truth from the people that I interview.
Bringing any bells, Danielle, Lucien um is sounding very familiar. Right, Well,
he's about to sound even more familiar when we get
(12:47):
into these questions, okay, Danielle. According to Lucien Wiggles, Mariah
Carey is known as the Queen of Christmas. Would you
also identify as the Queen of Christmas? If not, which
day would you call yourself the queen of Okay? I
(13:08):
am definitely not the Queen of Christmas? I hate Christmas?
You hate Christmas? Yeah? Because I have to be around
my family? Wow? You never hear people say they hate Christmas.
I don't love Christmas? Okay? Right? And so what do
you usually do at Christmas? So? So, like, do Christmas
(13:28):
songs and Christmas decor do they really get under under
your skin? I don't like Christmas decor because I think
it's tacky. But I do enjoy songs. Okay, so you
like Christmas music that celebrates the holiday that you do
not like? Yeah, because Christmas songs are generally like catchy
(13:48):
and fun, right right right, right, right right, Okay, So
do you like Mariah's Christmas song? I will listen to
that all year round. All I wanted this is you iconic,
Like that's just a joyous song. I love. You know
what I love. I love like hip hop remixes of
Christmas classics hilarious. So I can't say I've ever heard
(14:12):
a person say that before. It's like they're so cheesy.
But like I remember like as a kid, there was
like the c D and I think I had like
a TLC remix of like I'll take any I'll take
any iteration of TLC there is. But do you know
what I'm saying? And it's like also that like you
know that Wilson Phillips Last Christmas, it gave you a
(14:34):
part Like there's like fun stuff, you know, like there's
like I'm not talking about jingle bell rock like funk
that ship. You know, I want the pop songs, the
fun pop Christmas songs, and you're talking about also, you
know a Christmas song done by one of the greatest
vocalists of all times. So you you like you want
(14:56):
a high caliber star singing your Christmas Wilson Phillips Mariah,
and you'll take nothing less. Basically, Okay, Well, what day
would you call yourself the queen of? We are here
and now in this moment forcing you to declare your
queendom over a day. I guess I am the queen.
(15:20):
Oh my god, um, I'm the queen of Like, um,
what's the day when you get an extra hour of sleep? Savings?
That's me? Okay, she's up sleeping in an extra hour, right, Okay?
(15:45):
Simple yet true? Really, just cutting difficult to please. She's
not taking one of the main holidays. No, No, you
can keep Easter, you can keep the Solstice. Look, I'm
an astro bitch. I love you know, I love conjunctions.
(16:06):
Just give me that extra hour of sleep. How are
you feeling after yesterday's Neptune Jupiter conjunction? You know, I
honestly I think it took a lot out of me.
I did do some meditation. I did, like, you know,
say what I want, and I think it's working. You know,
I'm exhausted. I am so exhausted today. And also the
(16:28):
energy I know it was supposed to be like a
loving like release, like, oh things are a little positive
swirl now has come into the ether. When I felt
like yesterday when I was noticing in the air, uh,
the energy felt very chaotic to me, like it was
like sirens wind. The wind was really it was intensity.
(16:50):
It felt like a lot of intensity in the air
to me. Yeah, it felt really Yeah, the wind was
it was too much. It was like this is I'm
feeling rattled? Yeah. Do you think someone in Oklahoma is
listening to the last two minutes of this podcast and
it's like, what the funk are these l a bitches
talking about? You know, they're like, oh, Twister is coming, babies.
(17:14):
You know my followers and fans that are all around
the entire globe and even intergalactically. No that I'm a
crazy bitch. So uh, there's nothing to hide here. We're
all welcome here, and they all welcome. They welcome all
of us. Danielle, I love it. What a safe space.
Oh it's sah, just say space. Thank you for saying so. Okay, So,
(17:39):
according to Lucian Wickeles, in high school, Mariah's nickname was
Mirage because she was always missing school to work as
a demo singer. Danielle, What is your nickname that the
public may or may not know about? Wow um. In
(18:09):
my early twenties, basically until I started doing stand up,
my nickname was Diva. It sounds like somebody else, it's
like really Danielle. So people were like, hey, Diva. People
would just call me Diva, Diva d Literally one time
I was at H and M with my sister and
(18:30):
I got stuck in the elevator and okay, terrifying, Yeah,
you know, I was like, oh my god, I'm literally
just trying to try on like some some dress that's
like not going to fit, made out of like just
like the cheapest polyester fabric. But I'm like stuck in
(18:51):
this elevator and H and M, and my sister's like screaming.
She's like Diva, Diva. She's like freaked out. And then
all of a sudden, I hear like the h the
manager be like Diva remain called but he thought that
was my name. That's hilarious. It's like real people just
like thought my name was Diva, like because everyone would
(19:12):
call me that. Literally, elevator operator in one of the
most harrowing moments of your life, calms over the loud
speaker to speak to you in a way to calm you. Diva. Listen, Diva,
Calm down, Diva. We will be getting you soon. Diva.
(19:33):
What it sounded like basically mortifying but also hilarious, but
also an incredible moment truly to have. And as it's
the queen entire store, be like, there's a Diva in
the elevator. Oh my god? So so do some people
still call you Diva? Can I call you Diva? You
(19:53):
can call me Diva. One thing that's actually really funny
but also terrifying is that, like, you know, I have
like a life for a stand up which can you believe?
I did too? I started late in my life and
I didn't know anything about it before I started. Also, same, same, same, same,
So every now and then I'll be out and about
and someone will just be like Diva, and I'm just like,
(20:15):
because it's likely gotten, you know what I mean. It's
like my past has come back to haunt me. All
these these chickens have come to roost, you know what
I mean? Oh no, what did I do to you?
In a blackout? What did I say? Who did I fuck?
Who did I steal from? Or name? And injure you
know what I mean, It's like, you know, I know
that I'm like kind of notorious, is like oh Janail
(20:37):
is like pretty wild and crazy, and it's like this
is me, this is this is a restrained calm focus
to Yale. If you can only imagine, if you can,
I wrought when I was going by Diva yea God,
I would love to have seen that. I would have
(20:58):
loved you been in that store and recognized the queendom
diva Diva, the diva de Yeah, okay, okay. So I
also feel like my high school nickname could have been
(21:20):
Mirage because like I missed more school than anyone on earth. Um,
you were just ditching sort of yeah, like my mother
ate it in a bedded me because I went to
a private school and I committed to u c l
A early for volleyball, like beginning of my junior year.
So like I already knew I was. I was just
(21:40):
like a ship at kid and I already knew I
had gotten into college, you know what I mean, Like
I'm glad I don't need to do this like I
was like, I'm not really interested. Um no, I actually
really loved school and stuff, but I would I was
just a like dumb teenager, like I was usually reading
a novel in the class, like such a shoot head,
I love you. Um, we're trying to talk to you
(22:02):
about like the geometry. Yeah, and you're just like I
would rather read. It's like, I'm busy if you could
just not bother me, thank thank you. Oh god, it's
so disrespectful to be a teenager. Like, oh my god,
teens are the worst. Have you been watching that the
(22:23):
Girl from plain View? No, I can't watch that ship
Like it makes me sick. I'm too sensitive. Okay, is
it good? It's interesting. I think like Dakota Fanning or whatever,
or l Fanning, I don't know, she's amazing. She's amazing,
she's great, but like, okay, the thing about it is
(22:44):
it's like, okay, teenagers are the worst. They're actually annoying
and fucking like they suck. But also mental illness is terrible. Yeah,
but also like, oh my god, teenagers are the world. Yeah. Yeah,
it's like this really weird mix of like, God, I
hate all of these kids, and I'm you know, but
(23:04):
then it's like, oh, it is sad that like he
killed himself, but also, fuck man, how do you help
someone who's just in such a dark place, very sad,
A lot of mix of emotions. Yeah. I don't really
know the story. All I know is that like a
lot of teenagers are feeling, they're feeling so intensely, have
(23:27):
not learned or lived enough life to develop self regulation
unless they have like very conscious parents that are there
to help rare. Yeah, and I think like that's part
of it and not to be like we gotta blame
the parents, but it's like the girl's parents, it's like
they're so like it's clearly like they're very like upper
(23:47):
middle class and stuff, and it's like you have the resources. Yeah,
but that generation also really doesn't believe in therapy and
like all the tools that are generation does like they
remain sort of disconnected from themselves, and even whether it's
subconscious or conscious, I do believe that they maybe subconsciously
(24:11):
still have this idea or stigma that therapy is for
people that are messed up or like mad. Yeah. So
it's like, but then why weren't they in therapy as well?
I don't know. I don't know. I don't know really
(24:31):
any of my friend's parents who are in therapy. If
they are, it's like a miracle. Um okay, So, according
to Lucien Wigles, Mariah has sold over two twenty million
records worldwide and is one of the best selling artists
of all time. Danielle, do you secretly plan to take
(24:54):
her crown? You already are rapidly taking over television and
what I see as a Macavellian way, how good to
you coming to take Mariah's recording crown? Tell us the truth?
What are your plans? Oh? I mean, I would never
even think to try to snatch myse crown. I mean
(25:16):
to even be in the vicinity of a crown already
would be such a coup. Do you know what I mean? Yeah?
I am. You know what. I like to sing, but
I'm a terrible singer. But I haven't making voice lessons
because like it just is fun for me. I really
want to do that too, because, um, have you improved? Like,
(25:39):
how is it I have improved? I booked a musical?
Are you fucking kidding me? I'm see you aren't such
an inspiration, You're not an asshole. That's like the most
incredible thing I've ever Like, you are so inspiring to
me in every way. You're so kind, I mean fully,
(26:00):
like I think, I'm like, that's amazing. You're just like
really doing it. Um. Yeah, it's funny because I m
am now working with the same acting coaches you. Yeah,
I'm such a man because like when I heard that
you were one of her clients that literally sinched the
deal for me because I was like, Danielle literally stays booking,
(26:23):
Like I maybe this is gonna help me. Um, But
she said, because you know, I lose my voice really easily,
as you can imagine. Um. And then you know on stage,
I'm sort of in a fugue state, So I know
what you mean. So I lose my voice easily. And
I have been told many times that taking yeah, yeah,
(26:47):
because like you learn to use your breath and um
from the throat. Yeah. Because the same thing for me,
Like if I do, like anytime I could do a
comedy festival where I'm like gone per weekend, or if
I go and do shows for a week somewhere, it's
like my voice by the end of it is just
like raw me too completely. But even if I don't
(27:10):
drink a drop of alcohol, Like I'm fully responsible, trying
to take such good care of myself. It's like the
traveling just and being on stage at long, but so
much of like singing is like breathing, which is like yeah,
it's like breathing properly, breath control, and like yeah, but
(27:32):
I'm enjoying it. I like it. It's fine. Have you
been doing it, um for like since since like uh February? Wow? Cool?
And you just started it for fun? Yeah? I started
for fun. My friend James, like he does vocal lessons
(27:56):
and he's like a really great like singer, like he
studied opera and stuff like that. So and I know
that he like does voice lessons like um, like in person,
but he's in San Francisco, so we do it a
resume and but it's like I like, say, I don't know,
I've been trying to like in this pandemic. It's like
(28:16):
what do I like? What do I enjoy? And let
me like kind of focus on those things. I'm doing
the exact same thing. And it's actually been so enriching
to my life, even though I've gotten significantly weirder in
those ships that I've been pursuing. Wow, yeah, but I
(28:37):
feel like it's like those things, It's like that's what
makes you you, That's what makes you like exciting and different,
and like that's what people are gonna relate to and
be excited about. You know. Here's helping Danielle myself. I
don't know. Yeah, I'm just I'm like I mean, not
(29:01):
to derail. No, I love to derail. And here we
always come back. We we even And now that's what
it's about over here. But like at the beginning of
the pandemic, I was so like, oh my god, like
everything I worked towards is gone and stand up, stand up,
you know. I was so like show show shows, And
now it's just like what do what Am I really
(29:22):
interested in? What am I reading? What sparks joy creatively?
You know? And I think the stuff that's like more
important done sets, sets, sets, you know what I mean.
It's like that's the stuff that's going to like bring
like cool ideas to maybe like develop like shows or
live shows or just stuff. You know. Yeah, I just
(29:45):
think it makes you also more vibrant to be like
breaking things up, changing things up, you know, getting new
energy and trying new things and like having more fun
in your life, like just makes you a more attractive person.
Yeah out, Oh my god, should we like call Tony
Robbins and tell him that he's done and we're taking
(30:06):
his place? Finished? Bye bye, Tony. Okay, So, danielle O
Mariah was married to infamous Impregnator procreator Octo father Nick
Cannon from two thousand eight to two thousand sixteen. Please
tell our listeners do you also plan to have a
(30:28):
baby with Nick Cannon? I do not plan on having
a baby. Really will tell us why you do not
plan to have a baby with Nick Cannon. I don't
know if he can support any more children, right, I mean,
that's the truth, you know what I mean. It's baby daddy.
(30:50):
Don't need a broke baby daddy. It's not like you know,
little Wayne has a whole department, you know, just sending
out those baby mama checks and I don't. Yeah, I
don't wilding out and paying that good, you know what
I mean? MTV now part of the paramount plus not
I don't know if they can cut checks like that. Yeah, okay,
(31:15):
fair enough, good reason. Yeah, I think I think that's
probably smart. Like at this point, I think you'd have
our time remembering the names of all his kids. You know, yeah,
I just like Eddie Murphy can afford to have ten kids, right, yeah, yeah,
because he was just like making hits left and right. Yeah. Yeah.
(31:38):
He's got residies coming in, right. We need to get
residies also, we're trying to get those resigies. Want resigy money, Yeah,
we need those residies. Okay. So in two thousand five,
Mariah came out with the Emancipation of Mimi, which became
the best selling album in the US and included one
(32:00):
of the best tracks ever in the world, we Belong Together.
Please tell us what is the emancipation of Danielle and
who do you belong with? Oh? The Emancipation of Danielle
is um, Oh my god, the Emancipation of Danielle I
think has really been um mommy doing stand up? Frankly, Yeah,
(32:25):
how did you start? Like? What? What? What made you
start stand up? Okay for real? So Madison my bff,
Madison Shepherd, Yes, lover. Um. She was living with this
comedian and so we started going to his shows and
by the third one, I was like, he's not funny,
I'm funny. I was like, madisone how do we do
(32:46):
stand up. He's not funny. I'm funny. Oh god, I
feel like that's so many female stand ups origin story.
And she's like, we go to open Miggs and I
was like okay. So we went and open mic and
I really thought we were there to watch, and then
she like signed our names up and I was like what,
(33:06):
and she's like, it's okay, I'll go first. So she
was like number seven and I was number eight. And
it was at this literally is at this coffee shop
that doesn't even exist anymore on Sunset across from Meldown.
It was called rock Paper, but like I just like
started talking about my life and people like we're paying
attention to me. I'm laughing, and I was like, oh
(33:27):
my god, I need this for the rest of my life.
I was like, I've never done Heroin, but I feel
like it's something close to that, just like chasing that
dragon Jason that high, and I just yeah, immediately fell
in love and was like, Okay, I guess we do
stand up now. And like it was just like doing
(33:48):
open mics constantly, fully obsessed. And I think like also
just because like I started in l a like very
soon like after I started, it was like and Strick
and Williams did Conan and I was like, and in
Solomon did Georgio did Conan, and it was like, oh,
I see, like kind of what can happen with stand up,
(34:09):
you know, And I was like, okay, well I want
that to happen for me, so I have to just
like work really hard to do stand up so that
I can't that. I just like, yeah, I immediately fell
in love with it, and I like, I started stand
up at thirty like a lunatic. Like literally, I love
the illusional woman, like I have a thirty year old
woman and I'm gonna start entertainment. I love that though,
(34:34):
like because you know, so many people live their whole
lives with never ever listening to that thing inside them
of what they want to do, because they just have
too many logical reasons why not to, you know, like
there's every reason in the world not to start stand
up or do stand up be in dignities. But it
was just like you felt it and it was true
(34:56):
for you. Yeah, that was definitely like the emancipation of Danielle.
I feel that's so cool. I love it. And who
do you belong with? Danielle? I belong with Angus Cloud.
Was Angus Cloud, he's fast from Euphoria. Oh you know,
(35:20):
my asses not watching you for it. I'm obsessed with him.
He's such a cutey. He's such a high little I'm
googling him. Cuty just fully out to a lot and
she just fully just like, oh no, I should the
clip of this guy yes where he like couldn't even
answer the question. He was like, do how is it
(35:44):
emotional for you? And he said no, thanks? What a name?
Angus Cloud. He's from like Oakland in the Bay Area. Wow,
he sounds like he's like in um from Grapes of
Wrath or something. Um. Okay, didn't yell and Angus Cloud
(36:08):
forever move over? LEXI No, because everyone talks about how
Euphoria is like the best show we had show. It's
truly not. It's like it's fine, but people love it
and like I think it's drama. Its intensity, you know,
(36:28):
it's like beautiful, Like here's the thing, it's gorgeous. It's beautiful.
There are like really amazing moments, but it's like, if
we're gonna be real, it's it's very thinly written, like
it's not great writing. Okay, last you are the producer, writer, director,
and you're hearing this and you think I'd be perfect
for it. Um, besides that, for sure, Sam Levinson listening,
(36:54):
we're both avail well. I mean he did a really
amazing choice in hiring Martha to Kelly as like this
incredible villain. I mean, yeah, we just had her on
and we were talking about it, and I was telling
her because we share Mortha and I are like both
so sensitive, like don't watch a lot of scary or
intention like that, and I was like more of a
(37:16):
I heard you were on and I was dying to
watch it, but I couldn't because, like I tried to
get through the first episode and it made me feel sick.
It's you know what's like funny, did you see Like
Britney Spears is like Instagram post about how watching Euphoria
calms her down right and from anxiety, and it's like,
oh my god, what the traumas that Britney has been
(37:36):
through that this is soothing for her. I think that's
like a very normal phenomenon for a lot of people.
You know me, I'm very deep into the psychological theories
of today and when you're used to that those extreme
chemicals of that you get from hit to emotion, like
you want to keep those going, or like it feels
(37:58):
almost like a relief from numbness sometimes, don't you think,
Like a lot of people that are really into horror,
I'm not into horror, so I don't understand it, right, Yeah,
I don't either. I'm like, I don't want to see
someone get brutally murdered. But maybe I'm weak Danyell, Oh
my god, are you are not weak? You're not at all?
(38:18):
Were strong at people? I know? Yeah? Then guilt? Oh
thanks bitch? Oh my god, they're nowhere to be found today.
But who needs anyways. According to Lucian Wiggles, Mariah sites
(38:45):
Marilyn Monroe as one of her biggest idols. Danielle, who
is your biggest idol? Lucian told me that he thinks
that you were going to say him. Um, he bet
me a new fresh water fishing lure and a bag
of worms that you would say he is your idol,
but you barely remember who he was, so it looks
like I'm getting motherfucking bag of worms. Get those worms,
(39:09):
enjoy those worms, Blair, Yeah, because Maria is my idol
and true idol she is like I truly am obsessed
with Maria, Like I want, I want, like I want
everything Maria has. I want to just like live in
my bathtub, hang out and like gorgeous gowns. I do
(39:34):
love the gowns. She's always in a gown like sort
of a Grecian sort of a Grecian thing going. I
always want to have like a fresh blowout. Yeah yeah,
I feel like shady when people like you know someone
I don't like and just be like I don't know her.
I love that. I don't blow out my own hair.
(39:57):
I go to dry bar. You're the BA, so you're
such as diva. But you know what Maria carry level.
They come to her, you know what. I know that's
the next level. I think you'll be there soon. But
you do bring a lot of glamour to you, like
you always have like a beat face, the nails, the
hair like out like you really come come ready. Thank you,
(40:20):
we're trying. Yeah that's m C m C squared level. Um, okay,
well thank you. I am now the proud new owner
of a new freshwater fishing lure and a bag worms yea.
According to Lucien, Mariah famously said about Jennifer Lopez. I
(40:42):
don't know her. We all know that quote. What is
your personal favorite way to shade your enemies? And then
please list all of them for us? Oh my god? Um,
and don't leave any thank you? Oh my god. I
(41:04):
mean a classic is not remembering them? Right? Okay? Oh
so that's a purposeful, calculated shade, hysterical. It is cruel,
and it is evil. It's pretty mean, but it drives
(41:26):
people insane. That's so funny because you know what that's. Um,
it seems to be amongst my friends like comedians, number
one thing that trigger they get upset about, which is
so funny to me. I've never understood that. I always
people get mad when I reintroduced myself, and it's not
because I forget them. It's because I don't expect them
(41:47):
to remember remember me, and not in like a low
self esteem way. It's just like I don't need the book. Yeah. Yeah,
but that's really funny. That really makes you laugh. I
will be thinking about that for a long time. Um,
you did you do follow your idol? Okay? And if
you could list your enemies now one through ten? Oh,
(42:11):
is this going to be bleeved? We can negotiate. My
enemies are the DoorDash driver that forgot my orange Fanta yesterday.
Oh okay, yeah that was really I really was looking
forward to that, right, I was the where do you
(42:33):
order from? By the way? Popeyes? Okay? Good? Yeah, I'm
so curious, you know what I mean? How are you
going to have Popeyes and not have like, you know,
like a orange Like A'm not gonna eat drink water
with that. I want the orange soda, you know. Yeah,
you really completely robust flavor beverage. Exactly right. I get
(43:00):
what you're saying. Um, my enemies, Um the inaccessibility at
Dynasty Typewriter. Oh sure, okay, yeah, just full stairs, no ramps. Um,
how do you deal with that? Does? What do you
do in those situations? Because like that's a whole another thing,
(43:23):
Like you're such a badass. I mean, I mean it's like,
I don't know, It's to the point where I'm just
like I'm so tired of it, you know. Yeah, I
feel like I'm like I've been a good sport for
seven years. I can't even you are you know, get
a ramp at this point. It's like you're not going anywhere.
(43:48):
Yeah no, But it's like people have to carry me,
which is like, you know, we all are doing like
the best we can find, but it's like it's not
really fair to um, it's not really fair to me.
It's like, you know, frankly, not very safe for any
of us. You know, you know, something happens to them.
It's like, well, you know, right, just get a ramp,
(44:13):
get a ramp, get a ramp. So that's an enemy
of mine. Um, it was my third enemy. My third
enemy is do I have any more enemies? I'd have
to say if I could say one of mine, which
you know, I try not to have enemies because yeah,
(44:35):
I'm working on that. I'm not really at Mariah's level.
But my dentists. Yeah, if I can call my dentist
my enemy because I feel, um, I feel that she
doesn't have my best interest and um, that she doesn't
know me enough. And I'm always like oh yeah, and
I'm like, no, not for cleaning, just for like bullshit
(45:00):
whatever they're doing in there, And I'm like this, give
me laughing, gus, bitch, I feel you're trying to uh,
you're not listening to me. Yeah, just like gass me up, girl. Yeah,
So okay, next time I go to my dentist, I
will say nice to meet you, and uh, it's going
to be my strategy. Nice to meet you, Larry. You've
(45:25):
been coming here for five years. It's really good to
meet you. Um okay. According to Lucian Wiggles, the song
Obsessed is about Eminem, who apparently kept shifting on Maria
(45:46):
for a while. I do remember this in multiple songs,
and my question to you is how do you personally
deal with any haters? And is it always through song
like your idol? You know I I don't deal with
the haters through song to Maria. I deal with haters
(46:08):
by talking trash about them to all of my friends
number one, letting them know they are persona and on Gratta,
letting them know they're on the ship list. I want
I block you, got a block to oh whoa? I
literally truly if I don't like someone, I don't funk
with them. I just blocked them on social media. Really yeah,
(46:32):
because odds of me running into them I r l
in a pandemic girl never right, okay, then some of
them seeing them even out and about It's like I'm
mostly gonna mostly the easiest way for you to find
me or interact with me is online, so we're cutting
that right off. Wow, oh my god, So I like
(46:53):
I sort of like this bold moves telling the universe
exactly where you're at, energetically extremely clear. No one is confused,
No one's confused. It's like blocked done by not not
not engaging, refusing to interact, because what are you gonna do?
Are you gonna come up to me and be like,
why did you block me? That's so aggressive and actually crazy? Um,
(47:20):
so do you block all your exes? Then? Uh? Yeah, wow? Nice,
Yeah I do. Oh my god, this is soul enlightening
to me. Okay. Danielle Mariah's fan base is known as
the Lamily Yes, a combination of the word lamb and family. Danielle,
(47:48):
what unhinged and unwell? Combination of words do you use
to refer to your pants? Oh my fans? Okay, So
I definitely think stand is one of stands stand stand
(48:10):
music stands, except for their Danielle freaks. Danielle freaks. Uh,
I just I want stands to be one of the words. Okay,
you can have that. You're the boss here, you're the
orchestrated doctor. Yes, you are, bitch. Oh my god. Um,
(48:34):
I'm all like blow stands. I'm so stupid. How do
you can find words? I'm like blowout, I'm like what
does what? What are things? Danielle likes diva diva song, singing,
being rich and on TV. Yes, she loves it on TV. Um, okay,
(48:56):
are we going to go with stands? Inn? But stands
are so basic? Yeah, but sometimes simple packs a big punch, folks.
I guess we can keep thinking on it too. Well, Workshop,
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not bringing the rapid
fire quick. Janielle, don't worry. You come as you are,
(49:17):
just like del Mariah Carry And I think that's a
lesson for all of us today. It's just to be
where you're at, Be where you up. Baby, I'll come
in for the crown. Actually, um, Danielle doesn't want to
snatch up at eye will that leaves an opening for me? Okay, Blair,
(49:44):
I'm not mad at it. I know everyone's clamoring for
me to begin my singing career. Um okay. Well, that
has been the conclusion of our shrewd and hard hitting interview.
We do one segment lift that we like to ask
our guests and it's called Fan on the Street. Okay,
(50:07):
Tree Tree Tree, Yes, world famous segment where we ask
our guests if they've had any fun celebrity encounter anecdote
(50:29):
that they'd like to share with the class. Oh like
me with a celebrity, Like I have a fun one.
Oh okay, uh funs love encounter. Um okay. I was,
this is so silly, It's very silly. I love it.
(50:51):
We love silly here. So um oh my god. This
was like literally years ago. This was like early two thousand's,
you know when like um, Rachel Zoe dressed like Lindsay
and all the girls. She was dressing all the dolls,
and so I was on Robertson you know where the
(51:14):
IVY is, you know this kids and uh kids in
and all that, and I was like in a boutique
and um, I was like looking at clothes and then
like this woman was like, oh my god, I love
everything they have, and I like turned her. I was like,
I know it's also cute. And I'm like having a
full conversation about how cute. All this closes and then
(51:36):
like during the conversation I realized I'm talking to Brandy,
like I want to be down Brandy like Brandy for
my youth, Brandy like Brandy went to the problem with
Kobe Bryant Brandy and so when yes, oh my god,
Blair coming for the crowd. But um, and so I'm
(52:01):
like having this like very like normal like you know,
like how like girls like you know, girls in the
dressing room have a conversation kind of vibe. But like
I realized I'm talking to Brandy, and so all of
a sudden, my eyes just like bug out and I
start freaking out because I'm like, I'm talking to Brandy.
But she was like totally normal and really nice, and
that was really cool. She sounds so nat That is
(52:24):
a really that's a really fun one. I was fun.
That was nice for our time, for our youth. That's
a really good one. That's a really fun one. That
was a fun one. And I am enjoying Brandy and
even immensely in the show Queens right now. Yes, it
it's so good. It makes me happy. I'm like really glad.
I'm like the music I love. Yes, it's really fun. Well, Danielle,
(52:51):
thank you so much for coming on the show. It's
been a real gift to us and all the fans. Worldwide.
Thank you and if you're a fan of me, you know,
just be a stand. Stands, be a stand. You already
here first folks, Dan yell love you by love you Blair. Bye,
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